#i dont rly think i Want the direct reply from ppl but as weird as it is i am just really yearning to scream it from the rooftops
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people found this which is kind of funny but also kind of keeps reminding me that the thing Happened even though my brain has since blocked it out so. mixed bag
i love the grind i love experiencing something devastatingly life altering and getting home just in time to scarf down One meal for the day and sleep immediately so i can get up in time to do the last few days of job that makes me frustrated and guilty inherently. guy in corner meme āthey dont know i witnessed the horrors yesterdayā with name tag that says āim sooooooo normalā
#genuinely no issue btw im just going OH HAHA people#signing my name at the bottom of document saying āventing on a side acc is public and u always do it with some sense that people will seeā#it is not just a slightly more cathartic notes app#anyways cw more venting im doing it in the tags to be secret hush hush#i would use the Vent Channel but#i dont rly think i Want the direct reply from ppl but as weird as it is i am just really yearning to scream it from the rooftops#bc everything has been absurdly normal since and it doesnt feel right#but its not un-right enough to make it worth directly taking someones time#anyways enough of that#everything is too normal! im fine generally and maybe anxious around certain intersections#but managably anxious#my brain and the world have shaken hands and said āthis didnt happen. forget about itā. and im not suffering! but it feels fucked up!#i know its normal and probably good to have it fade that fast but it feels like this entire thing imploded in on itself until it just.#stopped having happened. the opp report hasnt updated. theres no. proof it happened. theres no change and it feels like there should be#and its making me mad because as much as my brain has firewalled the memory i feel like i owe it to those poor fucking souls to take some#meaningful permemnant message from it because i did in the moment and now its gone and i feel like. i saw the world and now i cant. i WANTED#it to stick. it was fucking important#and i feel like its put me on edge just enough that im like. exhausted a lot. and i feel bad about not providing aside from work and that#i want to explain or excuse but i cant because it never happened and also to actually dig in to it would be wildly inappropriate#in any setting aside from with close friends who i ask thoroughly for permission#so im vaguing on my side acc in hash tags#idk. its making me mad ig#i hope the reports update soon because i want to know what happened#i cant believe it fucking happened actually. jesus
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how do u make friends and become a "personality" on tumblr? i dont mean being tumblr famous, im just pretty lonely. asking u since u seem to have a few
oh gosh iām surprised you think of me as havin friends n bein a tumblr personality! thatās kinda a compliment so ty! tho lol i might not be as popular as u think tbh? tho i guess i have an okay number of followers and the ppl iām close to on here are SO AWESOME n i love them? BUT OKAY! iāll tell u how i went about makin friends on tumblr! btw donāt be afraid to dm me like iāll be your friend! iām super shy but like rly friendly so?? ANYWAYS hereās what i did:1. be yourself even if you think ppl wonāt like you. you rly shouldnāt care about the ppl who donāt like u bc theyād prob never like you? and being urself helps you feel good about yourself and is REALLY attractive to ppl who might end up following you. be real. itās your blog, so donāt, for example, let some mean anon tell u how to run your blog.2. that doesnāt mean being insensitive tho! iām constantly tryin to be as fuckin nice as i can within reason. and oh yeah tag stuff like āflashingā or ānsfwā or āgoreā etc even if you use custom tags (i use āhā for nsfw bc i donāt wanna get flagged lol). and donāt repost stuff on here without direct permission. itās like stealing. and donāt delete captions off of original art (but u can remove a rebloggers captions all day).3. post your own ācontentā whether it be text posts or pictures u took or art u make or edits or finds off other sites! even if u think itās too dumb, i promise u thereāll be a buncha ppl who will like it. i thought my gifs were trash and then one day one wound up on tumblrās āradarā (or whatev it used to be called). MAKE SURE U TAG YOUR POSTS. itās fine to not tag reblogs unless theyāre something ppl are sensitive about (flashing,gore). itās fine to just reblog otherās stuff btw like ppl still love blogs like that (thatās most of tumblr tbh).4. your follower count doesnāt matter. the number of notes on posts you make donāt matter. itās so easy to fall into viewing those numbers as a sign of āhow cool u are/how much ppl like youā. donāt start posting things u donāt care about just bc u notice ppl like it. just be yourself. ppl will come anyways.5. talk to people. write little comments on ppls posts. respond to ppl. take the risk and direct message someone (be considerate tho. like if u have a crush on someone donāt open with āi wanna fuck uā lol). if you want friends, be friendly.6. THIS IS IMPORTANT THO. tumblr is easily the shyest community iāve ever encountered. and this is coming from someone who has agoraphobia (or rather a fear of people). even if someone follows you back and likes all your postsā¦ they might not respond to you. THAT DOESNāT MEAN THEY HATE U OR DONāT CARE. a lot of them justā¦ canāt? ur msg very easily made them really happy. sometimes ppl like that just need time. i wonāt lie, of the hundreds of ppl iāve tried to start conv with? maybe only 10% of them even replied. if youāre like me the voice in ur head will tell you āoh they hate you you weirded them out ur awfulā. ignore that dumbass voice. that 10% who responded? or responded later? are some of my best friends on here. ITāS ABSOLUTELY WORTH IT.take the risk. talk to people. rejection can hurt, but itās just like a little scratch compared to the gushing wound we cause ourselves by not trying. see, look at this stupid long unintelligible post i just wrote. and i somehow still have a bunch of friends and followers? iām a huge idiot, but turns out that everybody else is too thank god. so just be yourself and have fun!oh and it takes time btw. like iāve been active on here since 2012 lol. give people time to find u and respond to you. hope it helped even if it was just a little!
#anon#reply#ty for asking#dont worry you'll make friends fine!#long#sorry i mighta gave way too much info but hope this helps???#Anonymous
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