#im drawing this while having a flu

[itsguysnightitsironic]

It's incredible the Effect of Altitude on Cognitive Performance and Mood States

(Also like death and curses, but bah! Details)

I'm so glad the creepy crow is back, keep him Corvidae, no humanoid body, too much for the poor great Duque of hell with thirty armies of demons under his command-

[pletoric0]

who even are these guys

[sanchoyo]

convinced the universe doesnt want me to finish nano bc on top of getting the flu at the start of the month, my (mysterious dead anime mom) illness flaring up out of nowhere for 2 days straight, and possibly having strep, i woke up today with my shoulder blade/dominant arm on FIRE with pain. out of nowhere! I didnt DO anything! I just SLEPT on it weird! what the hell . well I am Not Quitting Nano No matter What >:(

[creative-caramel-coffee]

The Spiders Sister - Chapter 2

Summary: Reader is still a little sick and staying hidden while Wanda and Natasha look after her.

TW: Sickness, asthma

Words: 2.8K

A/n: Part two!!!

It must have been a couple of hours sleep before you woke up again. Somebody was knocking on the door and for a second you panicked, still feeling awful and sleepy your mind was working though a dense fog to catch up.

When you finally managed to recall the events of earlier that morning, you felt a slight bit of relief.

“Come in.” You called, your throat scratchy and sounding like sandpaper on glass.

The door handle turned, and you prayed the girls had kept their promise to not tell the others yet.

Wanda’s face peered into the room, and she glanced around until her eyes fell on you, still holed up in bed under the sheets.

“How are you feeling?” Wanda asked as she came inside, holding a tray. She gently closed the door after her and came to sit on the bed beside you.

“A bit better than I was. But not great.” You mumbled.

“Well, if you don’t mind, Nat and I are happy to look after you until you get better. Peter’s been telling us stories about you, now he can.” She begun and you groaned. Drawing a smile from her. “All good don’t worry. He’s a good kid and it sounds like you’re a good sister. And spider-man at that.” She said with a wink, and you buried your flaming face in your hands.

Wanda carefully pried your fingers away from your blazing cheeks and smiled softly at you.

“Now, I made you some soup and Nat’s gone to steal some of Peter’s enhanced-super cold and flu medicine out of Bruce’s lab for you.” Wanda said as she set the tray down on your bedside table. “Put this under your tongue.” She said handing you a thermometer.

“I’m fine.” You said not taking from her. She raised an eyebrow in challenge. “Really. Im all good now.” You argued and she still wasn’t having it.

Using her magic wanda floated the thermometer up to hover in front of your lips. You gave her a look and opened your mouth.

She beamed at you and the thermometer positioned itself under your tongue.

“Now what?” You mumbled from behind the stick.

“Now we wait for that to beep and go from there.” Wanda said catching the drooping thermometer with her finger before it could fall from your mouth while you spoke.

After a few more seconds of Wanda fussing with the things on the tray and messaging who you assumed must be Nat on her phone, the stick beeped.

Before you had a chance to remove it yourself wanda had stolen from your lips and was closely observing the numbers on the small screen.

She hummed a low note and sent another text to Nat before placing it down on the bedside table.

“Well?” You asked trying not to pout about feeling left out.

“102.3 still a fever.” Wanda said before standing and heading to the door to open it.

Natasha stepped into the room with three bottles of medicine in her arms.

She came over and took a seat next to wanda who had sat back on the bed like before.

She handed the bottles to wanda who looked at the labels and began taking out pills from two of the bottles and measuring out a red liquid from the other.

“Oh, hell nah.” You said. “I am not drinking that.”

Nat raised an eyebrow. “You will be.” She said and you frowned, slouching down and glaring at her which only seemed to make her smirk grow larger.

Wanda finished measuring it all out and handed you the two pills and a glass of water.

“What is this?” You asked.

“Fever reducers and cold and flu meds that were made for peter.” Wanda said and you nodded and took them.

Then wanda held out the small medicine cup of red liquid.

“Nope.” You said pursing your lips. “Not happening.”

“If you don’t take this, I’ll force feed you it myself.” Wanda said and you glared at each other for a second before swiping it out of her hands.

“Fine.” You grumbled and wanda beamed at you.

“Good girl.” She said and you defiantly did not feel your stomach flip at those two words.

However, Natasha seemed to smirk to herself about something while wanda busied herself with the soup.

You took the medicine like a shot and scrunched up your nose after.

“Why is it sweet?” You asked smacking your lips together.

“Peter’s a baby when it comes to gross cough syrup, so he requested it taste like cotton candy.” Nat said and you rolled your eyes.

“Of course he did.” You mumbled.

Before you could find further reason to complain Nat plucked the cup from your hands and wanda set the tray on your lap, fussing over the pillows behind you that were keeping you propped up against the bedhead.

You eyed the tray closely. There was a bowl of thick orange soup with a blob of white sprinkle with small green herbs. Along with a soup spoon and napkin.

“Um? What kind of soup is it?” You asked.

“Pumpkin soup with sour cream and chives.” Wanda said. “It’s an old family recipe from my childhood.” She said seeming to lose her smile for a fraction of a second before it came back.

You nodded. “Thank you. You really didn’t have to go to all the effort wanda.”

She just shrugged. “Its kind of what we do around here.”

“Look after each other, she means.” Nat clarified and you nodded and brought a spoonful of soup to your lips.

It was warm and tasted amazing. You hummed in delight at the taste and Wanda beamed.

“This is really good.” You said taking another spoonful of it.

“I’m glad you like it.” Wanda said.

“So, where’s peter?” You asked, striking up conversation.

“May took him home. Nat managed to convince her that you were fine staying here with us. We are happy to have you and if you like that could be a more permanent offer depending on what the team has to say.” Wanda said and you choked on your soup.

Coughing, you felt Natasha’s strong hands pound your back to help you breathe.

Once the fit had subsided you blinked at wanda who was looking at you with concern in her eyes. You waved her off.

“I’m all good.” You begun but she handed you the glass of water anyways.

“Small sips.” She instructed and you nodded and drank some of it slowly.

“Sorry.” You apologised. “I just wasn’t expecting that.” You mumbled, cheeks warm.

“No need to apologise I probably should have waited until you weren’t eating.” Wanda said and you laughed.

“But in all seriousness… you guys want me here? Like … on the team?” You asked and Nat looked at Wanda before nodding.

“We would need to have Fury sign off. Steve and Tony will have to agree as well, but theres not denying you would be a valuable asset to the team.” Nat begun. “I’m planning on holding a meeting with the team when your up to it. But until then I want you to rest and get better. It’s important you put your best foot forward when starting off with the team.” Nat said and Wanda nodded.

“You’ll do great. The team will love you.” Wanda agreed, throwing in her own two cents to Nat’s speech.

“So, Nat how did you manage to sneak in and out of Bruce’s lab and find peters meds?” Wanda asked with the grin that Natasha returned.

As Nat launched into her story, which included a cabinet of medicine labelled spider-baby, a banner-stark debate over what atom is the best and lastly her spy skills.

By now everyone had gotten themselves comfortable on the bed. You were sat against the headboard with wanda on your left and Natasha on your right.

The king bed managed to squeeze all of you in and left ample room for more space.

As Nat continued her story you found yourself listing to one side. Your eyes drifting half shut as the exhaustion rolled over you.

Blinking harshly, you tried to stay awake until a soft hand guided your head to something soft that smelt like strawberries and vanilla.

You decided to forgo fighting sleep for any longer and left yourself drift off.

Natasha grinned at Wanda who was stroking your hair as you laid on her shoulder asleep.

It was an adorable sight and Nat may or may not have taken a photo of all three of you together with you asleep in the middle.

After the two listened to your slightly wheezy breathing and elected to let you sleep for now and to monitor your breathing, Wanda put on a sit-com on the Tv on a low volume as her and Nat settled in.

Over the course of the afternoon Wanda and Nat kept a close eye on you as you slept. Listening to the wheeze in your exhale and making sure it didn’t get worse or require your asthma inhaler.

Once or twice when Wanda checked your temperature with her hand against your forehead you nuzzled into her palm, still sleeping which warmed the witch's heart

You were adorable in her eyes and the glint in Natasha’s said she felt the same way.

At one point your powers began acting up as Wanda wanted to get up for some water and she found herself stuck to you.

She had looked lost and slightly bewildered while Nat giggled and helped her pry you off her.

“Tony says peter does the same thing when he’s sick. They can’t control it.” Nat had explained to Wanda in a hushed and slightly amused whisper so as not to wake you.

Finally at around five in the evening Wanda decided she needed to get up and cook dinner.

As she slid out of bed you began to wiggle a bit, seeking the warmth that had been there moments ago as you had been tucked into her side.

Wanda watched like a deer in headlights to see if you would wake up.

Instead, you simply rolled over and latched onto Natasha leg. Clinging to it like a baby sloth cuddling its mama.

Natasha had looked surprised almost shocked at the turn of events and Wanda hid a giggle behind her hand at Nat’s comical expression before she schooled her features.

It took a lot to surprise Natasha, but you had managed to do it within only knowing her for two days.

Wanda silently slipped out the door as Natasha looked down at you with a peaceful smile.

No longer paying attention to the Tv she was gazing down at you as she gently traced a pattern on your arm.

Despite having only known you for two days, Wanda and Natasha had found themselves almost entranced by you. From the way your nose scrunched up when you smiled to the way it twitched like a bunny before you sneezed.

Peter had kept telling them stories about you and your escapades as spider-man that had often landed him in trouble with Tony.

Wanda and Natasha had found all the walls they had spent years building over their scarred hearts to have melted in the presence of your sunny disposition, even if it was buried under a little sickness at the moment.

Wanda wanted to learn more about you, she always loved stories as a child, but you seemed like the best novel she may ever get the chance to read. And she wanted nothing more than to write the rest of your chapters together. She would be willing to bleed the ink from her own body to write your happily ever after together on the same page. To exist in a world of you and her. To add to the ecosystem that fed her soul. Because she always felt she had room for more un her heart. She had felt love like this before, once before, and it was double as she had laid in the bed with the both of you.

Natasha dreamed of finding someone that felt like home. After so long running from false families and a broken childhood, she wanted nothing more than to curl up and relax with someone that made her feel safe. Someone that made her feel the same way you do when you drink hot chocolate while watching the snow drift down on a winter wonderland. You were the home she was looking for. The way your heart touched hers, reached for her like a magnet was something she rarely felt. Something she had only ever felt once before. With another redhead who lived in the tower.

Wanda finished making dinner at around six. Before calling the team, she plated up three dishes of food and left the kitchen.

Only once she was safely clear and, in the lift, did she tell Jarvis to alert the team for dinner.

When Wanda stepped back into your room the first thing, she noticed was the concern on Natashas face.

Many may see the black widow as a cold heartless woman, yet that was just her persona in front of the cameras.

Sure, she was hard to crack open at first, but it seems she had taken a liking to you almost immediately.

Behind closed doors Natasha was quite a sweet and caring person for those she loved, showing her affection in indirect manners such as little gifts and cracking jokes at just the right time.

As wanda approached the bed she begun to realise why Nat was worried.

Your breathing which they had been monitoring had grown more wheezy.

Nat looked up from where she had been studying your face to look at wanda.

“I wasn’t sure if I should let her sleep or wake her to use her inhaler.” Nat said.

“No, you did the right thing. We have to wake her up for dinner now anyway, so we’ll have her use it now.” Wanda said with a small smile.

“We should also check her temperature and give her some more medicine.” Nat added and wanda agreed with a nod as she placed the dishes down on the desk.

Natasha gently began to rub your arm. “Y/n/n. Y/n/n wake up.” Nat said softly and after a second you batted her hand away drawing a chuckle from Wanda.

“Noooo let me sleep.” You said but Nat wasn’t having it.

You tried to pull the covers over your head but Nat held them down in place on the bed with her foot.

“Would you get up if I told you wanda made dinner?” Nat asked and wanda stifled a chuckle behind her hand as you cracked one eye open.

“Maybe.” You said and wriggled so you were sat against the headboard.

“Good. But before you get dinner its medicine time.” Nat said and you groaned in protest.

“There’s always a catch.” You grumbled and Wanda winked at you.

“For you? Always.” Wanda grinned and you gave her a half-hearted glare.

Natasha pressed your inhaler into your hand, and you simply blinked at her. “I don’t need it.” You said.

“I’m not asking again.” Nat smiled sweetly.

“Technically you didn’t ask the first time.” You said and looked at wanda for backup where she was leaning against the desk with an amused smile.

“Nope.” She said popping the p. “I can hear you wheezing from here bubs. Take it and breath like the rest of us.” She said smugly.

“Whatever.” You pouted and took the inhaler, ignoring them both and looking at a spot on the wall.

When you were done wanda patted your cheek.

“Good.” She said handing you a thermometer you took and dutifully placed under your tongue.

When it beeped Nat’s quick hands beat you to it and stole the device from your lips.

“99.8 it’s gone down.” Nat said with a smile.

“Yay.” You drawled sarcastically.

Before you could even get another word or remark in Wanda placed two tablets into your hand. “Swallow these.” She instructed and pressed a glass of water into your other hand.

You sighed and did as you were told, making both women smile at each other.

As the three of you ate you complemented Wanda’s cooking and savoured the food.

The two women chatted to you about the avengers asking any questions you had. When dinner was done, they could see you fighting to stay awake.

When do I get to meet the team?” You asked over a yawn you directed into your fist.

“Well, we’ll see how you feel in the morning and go from there.” Wanda smiled as she messed around with the pillows. “Get some sleep Y/n.” She smiled and you nodded, too tired to argue.

Settling down you were asleep before they two had left the room.

PART 3

[504py]

No Compromises

Yandere Canada/Reader – You reunite with an old college friend, though he's nothing like you remember.

⚠️ Yandere content, kidnapping, self-harm, stalking, possible emetophobia (descriptions of gagging and the feeling of illness), no use of Y/N, gender-neutral reader.

IM BACK YAWL 😭😭 just a bit of a filler post and another apology for being away for so long!!! i tried to get this out by halloween but i kept adding more shit LOL

while this is much more aligned with his 2p version, i had no idea if it counts as such since here i portray his 1p and 2p version as the same guy 😭😭 so that's up in the air!

also u may notice the lack of a [oneshot] tag... thats cuz i have a prequel wip for this, but figured i'll just finish and post it if the people desire it LMAO. pls lemme know if y'all do!! anyways so sorry again and i hope u enjoy!!! thanks so much to everyone for sticking around and enjoying what i do 🩵🩵🩵

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

The light drag of a cigarette is the first thing you process when you finally come to your senses.

A man stands before you, singular lightbulb leering ominously above a head of overgrown blond hair, the bright light reflecting in his glasses making you unable to see much of his features. His tall, slender figure is highlighted by the stark overhead shadows that are being cast on his baggy clothing. He exhales, smoke billowing and resting heavily in the dusty, stale air.

"Hey." He says, the friendly, casual tone of his voice making you blink faster in the hopes of gaining more lucidity. His tongue pokes at his cheek as he drops the cigarette to the cemented floor and stomps on it. The gritty sound feels like boiling water in your audio-sensitive drugged up state.

"Are the ropes too tight?" He asks with a quirk of his head, you squint, thinking you'll be able to catch a glimpse of his face, but the dark shadows and your pupils trying desperately to adjust to the lighting in the dim room make the task much too difficult. You didn't even notice you were bound 'till you tugged your wrists at the mention of the word 'rope.'

The mystery man straightens his posture and takes a few steps closer to you. His sneakers are downtrodden. The lacing is asymmetrical, any recognizable color or branding rubbed off, and the hem of his loose jeans caked in what seems to be mud.

"Come on, you can speak, can't you? It's not like I taped up your mouth." The tone of voice he uses here is almost playful, yet too vague. You didn't know if it was condescending, comforting, or cheerful.

"I... I'm... Ropes are okay..." You respond mindlessly, your voice coming out in a hoarse croak. God, it feels like your head could loll off your neck at any moment.

"Poor thing. You sound parched– Tell ya what, I'll give you some water if you kiss me." Even if his face is still hazy, you can make out the glint of a smile. His canines are pointy.

He draws closer, and crouches in front of your seated figure. He's a lot taller than you thought, seeing him up close. You see the indent of a pointed dimple by the edge of his sharp lip corners when he turns his cheek to you. There's a few moles on his pale skin. He smells like tobacco, rust, and rainwater. Smells a bit like something syrupy and moldy, but maybe that's just the room.

You shudder away from his close proximity, and he laughs nervously.

"Aw, I thought that'd work." He chuckles, before facing you fully, still crouching.

You can finally see his face. What you thought were dark brown eyes turned out to be a dull shade of purple, just with his pupils as fully blown as they can go. The stare is creepy, but at least his droopy outer eye corners and straight blond eyelashes soften their impression. His nose is well-structured and pointy, reddish at the tip. His sharp lip corners seem to always point upwards, and were pink like they had just been kissed and bitten. If it weren't for this moment, you'd have thought he was an attractive man with a somewhat docile-looking face. His cheeks are flushed, he tilts his head in wonder, a few pieces of his hair falling over his face.

"Merde, you're really pretty up close. I can't believe you're in front of me right now. I missed you so, so much." He giggles, cold hand reaching out to carefully grasp your chin to try and steady your bobbing head.

He swoons, "So, so pretty." then presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth. The action makes him exhale a shuddered, moaning breath. Whatever is in your system prevents you from reacting too much besides a weak jerk of your body.

"I should get you out of this shitty room, but I wanted to be prepared in case you reacted more violently. I didn't wanna have to drag you around. Don't wanna rough my baby up." He says with a small smile, as if the thought secretly brings him some amusement. Maybe his otherwise comforting smile just comes off as sinister at a time like this.

"You're reacting so much better than I thought you would, though. You're being so, so good, you know?" He coos like you're a pet, taking his hand off your chin and his blunt fingernails gently scratching at the top of your scalp.

Your throat hurts. You swallow dryly. "Who are you?"

The corner of his mouth twitches, and his smile drops slightly. He takes in a deep breath and sighs, cigarette-stained air blowing over your face.

He squints at you. "You really don't remember me?" He says quietly.

You shake your head. His light eyebrows knit in what looks like an expression of heartbreak.

He tries to jog your memory. "Come on, college sweethearts?"

"...I didn't date anyone in college."

His lips part in shock, the wrinkles between his eyebrows deepening.

"It's Mattie. Come on now." He pleads, desperation dripping from every word. The higher, more pathetic register his voice shifts into begins to jog your memory.

The sound of that nickname makes your eyes widen and forces your shoulders to press against the back of the chair. His identity makes things a million times worse.

"...M-Matthew Williams? No, no, c'mon, we never dated. Don't be like this."

"We had something special, though. I missed you. You missed me too, didn't you? You even remembered my full name." Matthew's gentle voice raises, as if trying to convince you of his feelings, trying to justify this situation.

"Th-There must've been a better way to get in contact with me without tying me up."

He shakes his head, frown almost a pout. "I did try! But you'd always blow me off to hang out with your other friends, a-and– and I just couldn't watch when I found out you were starting to see someone else." Resting on his knees and looking up at you, he grasps your bound hands on your lap. The position reminds you of prayer. Worship.

"I love you. Always have. A-And I know I'm different from how I used to be, but maybe you'll like this newer version of me more. You did say you liked a more assertive partner, didn't you?" His head tilts while he nods, like he's trying to convince you of everything he's saying.

His crazed eyes quickly scan your expression for any validation. "Yeah, yeah... I-I was a doormat back then, so that's probably why you didn't return my feelings." He laughs bitterly, and the sight is almost irritatingly funny to you. He's comparing his former pitiful self to the way he is now, as if he had changed. "But I'm different now. I'm not a coward anymore. I'll take care of you, and I'll do it well, I promise. I'll make you so happy."

"Please, Mattie, j-just let me go, and I'll give you a chance–"

He gasps. "You used my nickname." A disgustingly lovestruck grin spreads on his pale freckled face. He presses your bound hands against his flat chest. His heart is beating wildly against his ribcage.

"Feel my heartbeat. It's all for you. It only beats for you. I promise I can make you feel the same way for me. Just let me."

"...Do I even have any other choice? You kidnapped me."

Matthew's smile falters, eyes drooping, and he looks just as pathetic as he did all those years ago. He frowns flimsily. "I-I'm sorry. But I'll be good to you. Really. I'll be so good for you."

You shut your eyes and lean your head back. Your whole body hurts. Weighing out your options, you make a decision. If this Matthew is just as pathetic as the one you remember, then maybe you have a chance to escape if you butter him up enough.

"Fine. Untie me first."

Matthew's eyes widen. "R-Really? If you fight back, though, I'll have to use force, so, please, just... Don't run."

"I get it."

Eagerly, he brings out a knife and cuts through the rope. He rubs and massages your wrists for you when you're freed from your restraints. Dusts your clothes off for you, too. Though, you're wondering if what you think is a needlessly thoughtful action is just an excuse for him to feel you up.

"Let's get out of this basement, yeah? It's much better upstairs. Promise." He says, gently holding onto your hand. His are covered in bruises and small wounds. Butterflies are taking flight like fighter jets in his stomach.

When you stand up, Matthew pauses for a bit, violet eyes raking over your figure.

"Sorry, I just–" He starts, before cutting himself off by quickly stepping closer to you and encasing your body in a hug. He trembles and lets out a shaky breath, tightening his hold.

"I missed you so much," His voice cracks, "So happy you're here. Really. I feel like I'm on top of the world having you all to myself. You're all mine, finally."

Matthew takes in a sharp, obstructed breath. "Ugh, I–" He pulls away and his voice sounds all wet. He's crying. If you weren't so woozy, you would have scolded him when he wipes his face with his dirty jacket sleeve. Even now, you care about him, and maybe that's why he's fallen so helplessly in love with you.

He feels like he's shriveling into himself when all he does is simply breathe and what comes out is a sniffle. It's shameful, to boast about being a changed, stronger man, only to fall apart with a hug.

Wordlessly, he gulps his insecurities down his scratchy throat and grabs your wrist, taking you up the dusty wooden steps and leaving the basement. He does this with such little care it surprises you a little. It forces you to come to your senses in order to not stumble over your own heavy feet.

The actual interior of the house is much less industrial-looking than what you'd assumed from the basement. Rustic is the first word to pop into your mind to describe this place. Cottagecore, like the trendy people say, but... with a whole lot less of that trendy factor. It definitely is comfortable, which is a relief considering the storm outside.

Oh.

Looking out the window makes you realize something dreadful. You were never scared of the dark, pitch-darkness, even, but the vantablack surroundings beyond the glass begins to shroud you in a shadow of realization; there is a total absence of light. There are no lights, there are no houses nearby, there is nothing. You were in the middle of nowhere. You glance down to Matthew's battered sneakers and mud-caked jeans, and wonder how much trouble they went through to get you here.

He senses your staring, and looks to you, following your gaze and flushing.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. This is no outfit for a reunion as important as this." He laughs sheepishly, weakly. He had managed to swallow his tears, with the only evidence left behind being his reddish waterline and nostrils.

"I'll, uh, I'll go change– Just sit down anywhere you'd like. Those drugs will take a bit to leave your system. I'll fix you something up to wash it down as soon as I'm back, sweetie." Matthew stays for a moment, gnawing on his lip like he's weighing something out in his mind, before deciding to just go for it. He leans in to quickly place a kiss to your temple, and despite his attempt at nonchalance, he lets out a thin, shaky breath, before scampering off into what you assume is his bedroom.

Still nauseated, you hobble over to the couch and collapse onto it with more grace than you expected. You spare only a few seconds before forcing yourself back up, making the most of your time alone to examine the area without the pressure of Matthew watching you.

You scan the room quickly, making note of any possible exits. There are only two in this living room. The window, and the lone door against the other side of the room. Nearing and examining the window, you quickly find that it has a keyed lock, and rush over to the door.

Keyed, padlocked, deadbolted. God, he really went through the trouble of installing multiple of these. You could only imagine what his keyring looked like. You wonder if you could nab it.

A long-fingered hand clamps over your shoulder, digging into your collarbones and pulling you back. It's over so quickly you don't even have time to complain and yell about the pain.

"What do you wanna eat?" Matthew asks sweetly. His voice, though recognizable, is different from the way you remember it. His signature softspoken-ness is still there, but it's hoarse, slightly deeper. Maybe it's because he started smoking, but no cigarette can be owed the credit of the subtle confidence in his tone– Maybe not confidence, but some sort of certainty.

Your irises tremble slightly at the startle as you return his stare, before gulping and answering. "...Anything's fine."

"Pancakes it is." He shrugs, a small smile on his lips. As he walks to the quaint kitchen, he pulls a black hair tie off of his bony wrist and begins tidying his wavy, honey blond locks into a low ponytail. His hair's grown so much since you last saw him, and you can't help but think it suits him well.

It's not just his hair, the rest of him has grown, too. Matthew's gained a few inches of height, though he looks slimmer than before. You're unsure if he lost weight, or if his height just makes him look thinner than he actually is. He's aware of it, that he looks slightly worse for wear, but he couldn't help but lose his appetite being away from you for so long. He'll gain it back eventually to look good for you. I have to, he tells himself.

Now that he's rid of his jacket and clad in just a loose, plain graphic shirt, you get a better look of the wounds on his arms. It's mostly around his knuckles and palms, maybe he's clumsy, maybe he does a lot of physical labor, those are strangers to you, but you're familiar with the thin scars on the inside of his wrists. They're faded and old now, thank god, but you remember the long teary nights in college you'd spend trying to convince him not to hurt himself just because you couldn't spend time with him that week. You made him promise he wouldn't do it anymore, and judging by the lack of fresh wounds, he's kept his word. Though those memories make your head throb, you feel slightly proud.

You wobble over to the couch, deciding to take a seat to try and soothe the nausea bubbling about inside you. You remember those red plaid pajamas he's wearing, too. Always wore them whenever you came over. You wince as another wave of pain ripples through your skull, and you wonder if he's purposefully dressed himself like that to remind him of his most favorite time in his life, one that he thought was yours too.

That smell of butter, vanilla, and syrup doesn't help. While your stomach does respond to the smell, you can't help but think of Matthew first before the food. He always smelled faintly of maple syrup, along with hints of lavender and men's shower gel. His old apartment reeked of it. You never thought such an innocuous scent could bring you so much irritation.

Matthew glances behind him, finding your zoned out, furrow-browed stare.

"Your head hurting real bad?" He calls out from behind his back, focusing on the current stack of pancakes he was building by the stove.

"Yeah," You say under your breath. You're not sure why you even bothered responding if you knew you were gonna answer so silently. A part of you felt it rude had you just been unresponsive, but good god, forget the formalities, he'd kidnapped you!

After a few more moments of head-clutching silence, Matthew arrives, sitting on the couch and placing a plate of pancakes on the wooden coffee table in front of you.

"Come on now, you should eat. You've been knocked out for a while, you're about to miss lunch and dinner." He says lightly, a faint sternness in his voice, like he were speaking to a child. You scoff feebly.

"Nah, I... I don't really feel like eating." Despite the apparent hunger pangs in your stomach, you feel terribly sick in the throat, like you were constantly on the verge of retching. As much as you wanted to down the food he's prepared for you, just the thought of eating makes you gag.

He lets out a small laugh. "Want me to feed you?" Scooting closer, he leans down and tilts his head to get a better look at your pallid, gloomy face, heavy with queasiness. You're still so beautiful, he thinks.

You shake your head adamantly at that, immediately regretting it at the dull pain that amounts from the action. "No, no, I'm alright, Mattie," You bite your tongue when you realize you've called him by that stupid nickname again. "I feel like I'm gonna throw up."

He can't help the cheesy expression on his face and the way his heart flutters at the nickname. "It'll get worse if you don't eat." He pouts. "Come on, at least five bites." He picks up a fork, already slicing a small bit for you, and holding it up to your mouth.

You look at it with a small frown and wince in your expression, and his eyes darken.

"I'll tell you where one of the keys are if you eat."

Those words grab your attention immediately, and haplessly, you take a bite of the pancake he offers you. Matthew lets out an airy giggle.

"I remember you used to complain so much about this. Whenever I tried to feed you." He says with a pointy, wistful smile. "You've changed a lot over the years. Still so in love with you, though." His gaze is heartbreakingly warm.

You look at him, heart stopping in your chest for a moment at how sincerely he's looking at you. His heart does the same, but just at the mere action of you meeting his eyes, acknowledging his existence.

"You too." You say simply, despite your thoughts being so much more than those two words imply. When his cheeks redden and his lips gape, you quickly correct yourself. "Uh, that you've changed. Not that I love you." He huffs a dry chuckle.

"Figured, but I wanted to believe it." Matthew cuts up another piece of the pancake and offers it to you. You bite, and his blush only darkens. While you're chewing, he speaks again.

"You're not wearing that bracelet I made you anymore." He makes a sad face.

You swallow, "It's in my apartment. Felt too bad to throw it away." The light returns to his lavender eyes and he grins warmingly at you.

The bracelet is simple, a thin twist bracelet made with red thread, all entwined together with love. Matthew gave it to you during a morning class, blushing and stuttering. He made one for himself, too, like the red string of fate, he giggled when he said this, lovingly looking at the matching bracelets around your wrists. Now that your vision was less foggy, you can now see that what you thought was a wound was actually that same bracelet around his wrist. The color has faded slightly, more dull with dirt and age, while yours is still as vibrant as the day he gave it to you. It's a shame he didn't nab it when abducting you.

"You still care about me." He grins, almond eyes sparkling with mirth.

"To my own detriment." You smile emptily at him, taking the fork from his grasp and quickly eating the rest of what you owe him.

"The key?" You remind him, and he seems like a lost puppy for a moment, before it hits him, his pointy-fanged grin widening. He chuffs bashfully, as if a secret of his had been revealed, before he answers, awfully joyous; "Oh, I was lying." He laughs almost childishly.

A feeling of cold dread and shame drips from your head and down your shoulders. Of course, why did you assume so easily that he'd just hand that to you on a silver platter? At the same time, of course you would, he's Matthew Williams, the same man who gave you his coat and paid your bus fare the first time you two met. He insisted you kept it, said it suited you better and he's got hundreds more like it anyways. You did, you kept using it over the years even when you graduated. You used it this morning, maybe that's why it was so easy for him to recognize you. Your gullibility strikes you with chagrin and you can only retaliate by pushing back.

"What? We made a deal. Why would you lie to me?"

Matthew's usually docile expression falls, and suddenly you feel like you genuinely have no idea who this man is anymore, and you regret thinking that you could just walk all over him and out that door like you did all those years ago.

"Do you think you have any control over this situation, sweetie?" He crawls closer, palms dipping the couch cushions. "Did you really think I'd guard you so loosely? After all these years?" The collar of his shirt hangs from his neck as he leans down, collarbones prominent. "Did you think I'd let you leave me again? Stupid." He spits, though it seems like the final insult was more directed towards himself than you.

You scoot back until your back hits the armrest, and before you can try and slide off the couch, a lithe arm cages you in.

"It tore me up, ripped me to shreds and I came back a different person, but the only thing that stayed, that didn't change, was my love for you– No, my love for you is what broke me in the first place. Please, god, just soothe me a little." Matthew's voice crescendos until it cracks, hysterical expression making you relive the hell that was your college days together.

"Just love me a little." He whimpers weakly, before pressing a desperate kiss to your lips, moaning in surprise as if he wasn't the one to kiss you first. It's short, brief, like it zaps him, too much for his poor racing heart to handle. The bright smile returns to his face when he pulls away, breathless. It stays despite the horrified look on your face.

"Why are you so disgusted? You already tasted plenty of me in those pancakes. You looked so cute eating up my spit." He teases, his glee evident in his voice, the loose strands of his hair tickling your face. The realization of what you had just consumed, what now sits heavily in the pit of your stomach, was something of his, makes you dizzy with abhorrence. You try to push him off, but he slams your shoulder back into the cushions, hands vice-like and heavy against your skin.

Matthew is panting, and when he catches his breath, his eyes widen and his irises shake. You can see his pupils contract and dilate. "I'm sorry, I-I'm sorry– Didn't mean to– Ah, merde." He whimpers, dropping his head to the crook of your neck. He's already reduced to a groveling mess, and you've barely said anything. "Please love me, I didn't mean it, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I love you!" He cries, and you hate that you really do feel sorry for him.

You hate him, hate the shit he keeps putting you through, hate how soft his voice is, hate how pathetic he is, hate how reliant he is on you, hate seeing his tears. You hate how he still manages to pull pity from you despite everything he's put you through.

With a shriek through gritted teeth, you fist his shirt and yank him down, this kiss is intended, and definitely felt like, more akin to an act of harm over love, but poor Matthew can't tell the difference.

He melts into it with a loving sigh despite his bleeding lips.

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

[bougiebutchbinch]

Im so so so so so sorry but I feel like this is the equivalent to a confession box and Im too prideful to face Father Wagner with my sins.

So. Father tripple B please accept my newest thought.

We all know that Logans happy trail isn't a trail but a whole road, a freeway if you will, from his head, down his neck, to his chest, down his abdomen, down between his legs, its all a straight shot, connected. Yeah? Okay?

Hey- Stay on point. Stop thinking about Logans inner thigh hair- Pay attention.

So Wade dosn't have any hair. "Peach fuzz and he can't even grow it." Ahh mfer. What he does have is stomach problems. Stomach problems that leads to stomach aches. As someone who lives with someone who has had stomach cancer, Wade would have intense pain and cramps when digesting glutinous foods such as thick pizza or pancakes. Glucose and Protien would be his best friends. Fuck milk. Fuck fiber, fuck gluten, fuck everything else on this food pyramid.

Weeellll.... I keep thinking about them cuddling on the couch, watching a random movie because his stomach hurts so badly, he's just- dead. A replica of the imfamous melting clock painting, a whining mess completely slumped against him, trying his best to ignore the peircing feeling deep in his gut as he tries his best to digest dinner.

Subconsiously, unprovoked, and not asked, Logan starts mindlessly rubbing his stomach, lazily massasing the muscle and gripping his loose thin skin. He pushes up and gropes the sides, almost oblivious to what he's doing because here's Wade, absolutely putty in his hands.

The way those big paws of his caress and knead at him feels too good, small pleased groans coming from him as Logan has his waist secure in one arm, the weight only adding to the secure feeling.

When he stops, Wade only puts his hand back, shifting to nuzzle his scruffy cheek and encouraging him to put pressure and press upwards with his full hand's girip until he eventually drifts off into a loud as fuck flu like snore that becomes music to Logan's ears.

This also works if ftm Wade because he loves when hes sitting on Logan's lap, reverse cowboy, soaking/cock warming him as Logan feels his own bulge inside of Wade's stomach. 👁👄👁

🤭Telling him how good it feels to be stuffed and Logan telling him how gorgeous he is with him in him like this. Sometimes, they just sit like this for a bit. Logan rubbing over him so much that it not only feels great, but every time he dozes off, logan bucks his hips up. "Shows not over, bub." He tells him, teasing him.

Wade's so warm. So happy. So.. chilled the fuck out, cuddly and for some reason, Logan rubbing his thighs and his stomach drives him just insane enough to obey his every command.

Oh, it's so not fair. Wade's so milky. So ready. So.. tired. And Wolvie won't fuck him OR let him go to sleep. But the thing is, he's drawing him out, trying to get him his max cozy so he will sleep awhile. Going as far as sharing a few blunts with him, blowing smoke in his face playfully and kising him with smoke in his mouth, letting him take big puffs until his body does numb with just how chilled out he is.

When he finally does let him sleep, Logan dosn't move, watching another shitty movie and habing a cigar, drinking some water, rubbing his stomach a bit softer now, whispering how cute his stupid ass was only to fuck him over of the arm of this couch and press him into it the moment he woke up, his viens twitching inside of that hot cunt like wade was sitting on a thrown... maybe he should get him a tiara.. dub him the best pussy in all the land or something corney like that..

Anyway. Goodnight, i'm tired. You're welcome for those thoughts.

PS, I learned what soaking was because of you, so this is your responsibility now. At least you get Thought-Support, though. Here. It's your weekend.

stares at this

stares at this

👁️🫦👁️

haha I'm normal. I'm normal. I'm n o r m a l :said with teeth gritted while clutching the arms of my chair:

in short - yes. YES. use that silly little clown as a cockwarmer as part of his healthcare plan.... he needs to relax thoroughly into subspace so he can get a good night's sleep - and what better way than for him to be slid down real gentle onto Wolvie's cock/strap like it's a throne and then have Logan whispering in his ear about what a good boy he is, while stroking his tumtum and working him soooooo gently into a haze of pleasure....

I want this for him so bad. It would fix him, I think ❤️

[ashecampos]

Riding it out

Aj Campos x sick reader

Reader x Chantal (twins)

Warnings : migraines, nausea, anxiety, basic illness stuff, fluff, my terrible spelling

Summary : reader is sick and her girlfriend aj comes to comfort her, little does aj know reader hasn’t been looking after herself, even going as far as dragging herself into school.

—————

You hated being sick, the word hate would be a massive understatement for how much being sick made you feel. Your parents are out of town attending to the company they own. Leaving you and your twin sister Chantal to fend for yourself.

Another fit of coughs racks your body, your lungs burn with this being the fifth coughing fit already with it only being 8 am, you had another half an hour before school started and you where dreading it. Throwing on one of your girlfriends hoodies and a pair of grey sweatpants you cough again, grabbing some water and your sneakers. Before you knew it you were at school, slowly walking to your home room class.

—

I put my head down on the desk, praying no one notices how bad I’ve gotten in the past 24 hours, the last thing I need is to be sent home and miss out on work, or even worse track. The teacher starts taking the attendance and I notice there is a few people off, probably experiencing the same symptoms I have right now. I am startled out of my thoughts when my phone vibrates in my pocket, lifting my head up I grab the phone to see who was texting me, seeing it’s the group chat,, I ignore it, not ready to face my friends at this moment in time. I know exactly how they will all react once they see the state im in.

——

Fast and curious

(Thursday 8:50am)

*missed call from Stacey Clark*

Timotee🪽: girl why are you calling us right now, why aren’t you in school?

Dillpickle🥴: wait my wife is off today??

Staceye😇: YES im off because SOMEONE gave me the flu…any guesses @y/n/n ???

Dillpickle🥴: oh baby why didn’t you tell me, I’ll ditch and come over in an hour

Gabrii🌺: guys im in home room with y/n now, she doesn’t look too good, what do I do?

Paige🎨: wait why is she in if she’s ill? Also get well soon Stacey 💕

Talía(Chantal): shes ‘riding it out’ her words not mine

Ayjay (aj): wait y/N’s sick? Since when? And why is this the first im hearing of it?

Talía : shit, she told us to not tell you, sorry aj

——-

You are hit with a wave of nausea as you slowly bring your head up off of the desk to look at the teacher who is calling your name, you look over at him and you don’t hear any of the words coming out of his mouth. His normally angered face turns into a one of pity. He shrugs the question off and points to Gabi, signalling for what I assume is for her to take me out of the classroom for some air. Not even a second later a hand is on my lower back, guiding me to the door of the classroom. I look up to see Gabi on the phone to someone while we walk at an incredibly slow pace to a water fountain. She points to the floor and tells me to sit. I slide down the wall, my legs failing on me, making me fall faster. The loud ringing of the break bell hits my ears and the halls are flooded with students. The noise deathening. I close my eyes a little tighter and hold my hands over my ears before they are swiftly took away, I look at the culprit, it obviously being gabi but this time I look at her she has both of our bags in her arms as she holds out a hand for me to take. “Cmon ángel let’s go find ur girl” she says nodding her head towards the door. I take her hand and we start to walk towards our groups hangout spot on the field. I immediately look for AJ, seeing the girl in one of my hoodies and a pair of black jeans with her signature white converse. Her head shoots up as soon as the doors of the school shut behind me and Gabi. She gives me a look of sympathy as I walk to the group. Chantal is the first to greet me “hey sis, feeling any better?” She asks with a worried tone, I simply nod not to draw too much attention to myself “we got sent out of homeroom..so no she is not okay” Gabi says for me, making Aj give me a disapproving look. “Baby cmon im taking you home” the shorter girl says while taking my bag off of me, I groan while looking at her, tears forming in my eyes. “Just one more class and if I don’t feel any better we can go okay?” I plead hoping I’ll feel a little better in an hour or so. “No ángel, we are going now, our next class is gym and im not going to let you be sent to hospital because your too stubborn to admit your too sick” she scolds me, I look over at Gabi and Chantal as if they would help, they are trying to help but im being too stubborn to see they are only doing this in hopes that it’ll make me feel a little better. I hear the doors of the school open again and turn to see Dillon and Tim walking towards us. This is around the same time my body is graced with yet another coughing fit, followed by nausea. I run to the nearest trash can and throw up the contents of my stomach into the can. Someone is thankfully there and is already holding my hair back as I do this. A hand runs down my back, I look back and see a ‘told you so’ look from my girlfriend who now has her car keys in her hand. “dale vamos ángel” (‘let’s go angel’) a very concerned Dillon says as he brushes my hair out of my face while helping me stand up and get back to the group of my concerned friends.

Aj grabs my backpack off of the floor where Gabi placed it, then she walks over and grabs my hand, pulling me along with her to the carpark, the rest of the group saying their goodbyes to me in a mixture of “get well soon” and “we will come round later with soup” between the lot of them.

Once in her car Aj turns to me, giving me a stern look before holding out her hand “give me your vape” she states without a beat. I stare at her blankly before looking at my bag. She shrugs and reaches over, her hand swiftly disappearing into my hoodies pocket and pulling out my vape, she then waves it in front of my face “none of this while your sick” she mocks before putting the small pen into her own hoodie pocket.

We end up driving for around ten minutes before I realise we aren’t going in the direction of my house anymore “uh aj?” I say quietly,, voice breaking due to a lack of energy “don’t worry we are going to make a little pitstop then we are going home” she says with that goddam little smirk she always sports, her little dimples gracing her tanned face. We end up stopping at a gas station where she runs inside to pay the cashier for the gas but she ends up coming out with tons of snacks and a crate of Gatorade. I laugh a little as she dumps it all into my lap before she continues to drive back to my neighbourhood. Once at my house she helps me carry all the snacks into the house and getting us settled in my room. Once she has me in my bed and covered in a few blankets, she quickly runs around the room setting everything up, turning my LED lights on, closing my curtains and turning on my tv before jumping into the bed with me. I laugh at how much she knows about my room which in turn brings me to another coughing fit. She rubs my back and hands me a bottle of Gatorade she managed to open in the midst of my fit. I take it from her and take a few sips of the drink, i thank her which earns a shake of her head. “How about we watch a movie huh?”

[slaingelo]

wheeewww bit of a personal post or whatever just kind of an update

im trying so hard to get back into drawing and posting frequently and actually getting stuff done but it's been really hard.

to summarize; that time i got really sick was in fact covid, not the flu.

i'm already physically disabled [ chronic joint and muscle pain, frequent migraines and nausea, chronic fatigue ] and i honestly cannot tell if these issues are just worse rn because of general stress or if i have long lasting effects from covid that are making it worse. but whatever.

big issue right now is that things are being not great at work. i'm not sure how long this will go on for, but for this week at least, half my department booked work off. i'm working twice as many hours this week as i usually do. and for my disabled ass, that's terrible.

i really do want to get into drawing multiple things everyday, i really love drawing and writing and doing stuff, but i just can't. and it makes me feel like i'm wasting my life away with how much i've been sleeping and resting which Does not help how terrible i feel and how hard it is to sit at my desk and draw.

also a big reason work on force gem's been so slow is because my internet has just kind of decided to stop working right ! meaning it's very difficult for me to sit down on call with lu for a few hours while we work on stuff for it together, because my internet keeps doing out and shit and it's very frustrating. idk, i'll try seeing if i can figure out how to fix it any time soon, but we might just need to contact our providers and hope they do something. :/

for the oc linkverse stuff, i do have the server made. it just kind of has nothing in it right now. once i add the basic channels and write out the stuff that needs to be filled + the rules, i'l lstart sending invites and we'll go from there.

idk. sorry. things have just been shit and not great recently. i'm trying here but like i said in another post my brain's just been so foggy and it's hard to do things and everything just hurts. i want weed but my meds say no :(

[astranauticus]

post mortem for my orv animatic bc i have lots of thoughts and yall are gonna hear all of them (that is a threat)

first is the obligatory special thanks/plagiarism declaration section but a lot of the shots in this are inspired by the original changgwi lyric video which like. please watch it there's a reason this song is a classic animatic song on bilibili like the music is good but the video definitely helped. also speaking of bilibili, special shoutout to this arknights chongyue animatic that introduced me to the song that will haunt the next 8 months of my life!

the original inspiration was the thought that the verse of the spirit telling the story of its own death felt very yjh coded but it took like another week of stewing on it to have the idea of using the final chorus for the dkos arc which was the moment i decided i have to actually make this thing

going strictly by when i started putting pen to paper (pencil to ipad screen? whatever) this took almost exactly 5 months since i created the first drafts in february but the first 3 months ish from february until may were also my school semester so. most of the progress (id say about >60%) was done in the last two months of me working on this every moment i wasnt at work (or playing project sekai, for some reason)

also! funny little detail but counting the drafts and some discarded frames my procreate stack for this thing has exactly 49 artworks in it! neat little easter egg i guess (yeah 51 wouldve been more fitting but whatever)

this fully slipped by both me (at 2am) and my friend whom i sent the finished version to (fighting the flu) but in the final edit i didn't actually include the second half of the last lyric?? it's 'i will take you to the mountain god' i apparently just wrote 'i will take you' and never finished the rest LMAO

speaking of the lyrics i dont speak korean and im not a huge fan of most english translations of this song that exists so on multiple occasions i was so tempted to just use the chinese cover someone on bilibili did because then i'd at least be confident i know where the fucking line breaks were (there's one line at the end where im pretty sure i didn't edit on the line breaks correctly but that was more of an intentional compromise because the timings would've been off otherwise. anyway) tbh the only reason i didnt do that is the atmosphere and delivery of the original song is. really unbeatable like the cover's also pretty good but it doesn't quite achieve the same effect

also speaking of things i fucked up im aware i drew sys in the wrong outfit for the dkos fight but like. ok full disclosure my orv reference folder is a complete mess (theres like 400+ images in there. for some reason) so on net ive gotten character outfits wrong while working on this thing like at least 3 times bc id just grab a random webtoon screenshot from my folder and go w it. it's just that by the time i realised i fucked up i'd already finished drawing all of sys's frames and i was too lazy to go back and change all of them LMAO

anyway yeah some other random things i wanted to whinge about:

there's a lot of effects i wanted to do that didn't quite come across due to. lack of skill/time/patience/all of the above but the one im really annoyed about is the yhk postchorus bit with the 3 circles bc. first off i think i drew those while halfway dozing off on the train to school once because uh. yeah

anyway poor drawing aside id really wanted to recreate the sort of. drawn-in effect on the circles and lines that the original lyric video had but i could NOT for the life of me figure out a way to execute that in capcut so. here we are (also you cant put transitions on overlays in capcut so that's why those also looked so bad. youre welcome)

honestly my timeline for this in capcut looks pretty ridiculous bc if you want to do word by word animations/effects you need to pay for the pro version so my workaround was just to have like five thousand text layers with 1-2 words on it each (do not recommend btw)

speaking of the text im a moron so i kinda forgot to account for the text when drawing frames and wow you can tell. yeah next time im just hand writing the text fuck this

and i have some more thoughts that are. mild to moderate webtoon spoilers so past this will be the spoiler warning line

__________________________________________________________

actually my original plan was to upload this the day dkos dies in the webtoon but a. i genuinely did think it was gonna be yesterday like i dont pay for the early access episodes so i was just kinda going off orvtwt LMAO b. i could feel myself burning out on this like the last few frames i drew for this were fucking dogshit so i figured either i finish it soon or i wont finish it at all

i will probably still draw something for dkos' death day though for those who celebrate (basically when i was thumbnailing for one of the frames in this i ended up with one that didnt fit the video aspect ratio at all but still looks pretty good so im promoting it to a full drawing. so look forward to that)

like for an idea of how fucking sick of this shit i was by like. last week pretty much like for the last few frames of the dkos fight i straight up forgot to draw dkos' wings and had to add them in halfway through editing last night. like that's how fucking out of it i was by then lmaoo

looking back its actually kinda funny cuz the whole put this up when dkos dies thing was my plan since february but i had literally no way of knowing when that would be especially since the webtoon stopped going with the novel chapter numbers exactly (i could.. guesstimate but my original estimation was in june so yknow. real useful) but like i can find evidence of me panicking about that deadline since may. why did i do that

given that deadline i knew i cant really include stuff from the novel past the dkos arc but man. the amount of times i wanted to use something from later (ESPECIALLY 1863 arc). i actually have another idea i want to test out thats like full epilogue spoilers partially because working on this for so long made me realise i really want to make more epilogue content <- what

yknow how i mentioned discarded frames yeah i had to draw dkos' death 3 times because the first two compositions just never quite panned out. i mean the current one is also pretty unreadable with the colour scheme but trust me the previous ones were way worse christ alive

[yoku-yukihime]

I have the flu. i cannot draw rn it sucks :((((

Im DYING fr im so exhausted, and my body hurts and im cold asf. This is a plot by the lunarians to get me sick so i cant invade for a while. Foolish as they are, i will be back.

[69constellationsinatrenchcoat]

I have to stop reading dystopian literature and watching dystopian stories (I won't) because here's a list of things that I've done reading Station Eleven (Emily St. John Mandel) and watching the HBO/Max series adaptation.

cried. so many gods be damned times

wanted to throw the book against the wall (and resisted)

wanted to cuss out the author

...cussed out the author

snapped the book shut and swore

...swore

made two playlists to fit the vibes

fainted

read fix-it fics because i was mad about a very clever narrative choice

dedicated nine songs to the universe

literally been so wrapped up in the universe i spilt milk down my shirt

screamed into a pillow

read it four times in three weeks

wanted to punch several characters

planned a new tattoo

had several flashbacks and moments of panic

related to the villain

related to the main characters

questioned my life in great detail

panicked over whether the Georgia Flu could ever happen

researched spread of viruses (again)

got distracted and tried to replicate the Georgia Flu in plague.inc

regretted ever reading the book

wished i could read it again for the first time

cried some more.

whispered 'im never going to finish this series' before binging another six episodes while drawing and crying because they changed the story for the better.

...anyway, thanks. Emily. You did a good job.

[horizonandstar]

OK SO. who want more thoughts of “heehoo i import sun and moon into my oc world :]”

i have Comics and Pictures in my brain that i cannot draw out so the next best thing is giant text post under the cut

lot of explanations and context incoming! i did not fucking realize that importing sun and moon into the world would actually be beneficial as all hell

they have inadvertently helped me worldbuild on the lore with all the gods and stuff and im actually happy with how it came out! i had god lore before with a bunch of pieces that i knew would happen but it was all janky, disconnected, and i just did not like it

pro tip that apparently works, at least for me: imagine what if blorbos exist in your oc world. you just gain free worldbuilding apparently

OK OK NOW ONTO THE SUN MOON PART. there’s still missing parts and i’m not done with them yet but here’s what i’ve got so far

sun’s name is gold and moon’s name is silver, and eclipse is their father (because i just like dadclipse for reasons that are unknown to me) and eclipse’s name is most likely saturn. shit does saturn even exist in this oc world. ANYWAYS i just straight up ripped the 7 planetary metals, i saw the associations that the several metals had with the sun/moon/planets and went oooh cool. this part may be scrapped or reworked later, it’s a bit shaky. it is really shaky actually

BACKSTORY: reincarnation is a thing in the oc world, maintained by the god of rebirth, whose role i originally created to stand in for the y/n character but now they’re an actual oc. oops. the god of rebirth is canon in the lore now. no more y/n character my bad

they are the one god that has no true name! assuming you know every god’s true name and everything, you hold the least power over the god of rebirth. the closest to a true name you can get is ouroboros, which is a title equal to god of rebirth anyways

to the other gods, ouroboros is known for being MIA, and very hard to track that it’s usually not worth the effort. the reason for that is because they’re usually off living their next life as Some Animal and keeps going to their next life. however, recent events means that it’s actually possible to track down ouroboros, now that they’ve stopped bouncing off to live their next life and are actually staying down as a god for this while

why? the world is Mega Fucked. gods are concepts given form, and some guy killed a majority of the pantheon. as you can imagine, this has some Extreme Consequences

the most relevant god to ouroboros (and some other gods) that got killed is the god of death. life, death, and rebirth are a trio of gods, and now death is missing, so life and rebirth have to step up. life is doing his best to pull people’s lifespans out and cut them shorter, which doesn’t work that well

rebirth has to keep a lot of things from coming back and living their next life, which makes them incredibly ill to essentially go against themself. the navigator, an entirely separate god that used to have nothing to do with all of this, is also stepping in to fill death’s role as best as he can by tracking down the wayward souls, and forcibly cutting people’s lives short if he finds them living past what should’ve killed them

everything is just not dying :V this includes disease too, so flu season is Hell On Earth

rebirth is still letting a few souls through, but keeping a lot of them behind what is basically a gate. 2 of the souls that rebirth lets through is sun and moon :]

WHAT WAS SUN AND MOON’S PREVIOUS LIFE BEFORE THEY WERE REBORN AS HUMANS? I’M GLAD YOU ASKED

THEY WERE GIANT FUCKING MACHINES FUUUUCK YEAH

the machine lore isn’t all that well built yet but before The Apocalypse, humans were just building giant machines and vibing with them. like i am imagining shadows of the colossus here (mainly the bird honestly) but they look a lot more mechanical

yes, the machines are alive. rebirth is also surprised, they thought they’d have to keep back the billions of microbes that made up the machine (like rain world!) from going to their next life, which, yeah, they did have to do that, but the machines themselves each counted as One Guy too which made rebirth go ! (exclamation mark)

rebirth is very excited about this and takes the opportunity to introduce themself to the boys when the 2 of them made a crooked little shrine in their backyard

eventually into adulthood, i have some possible events that might happen

1) moon nearly dies (he was like👌this close to dying and was in a lot of pain) when a Mysterious Person shows up, asks if he “accepts the consequences of their help” (he agreed), and then gets better!

the other living fears, if they ever meet him, call him Nyctophobia (they don’t even ask for his name) (why is spellcheck trying to get me to rewrite Nyctophobia into Arachnophobia). turns out the Mysterious Person was a living fear that turned him into one of their kin

except, Uh Oh, that sure had consequences! he and his family watches day by day as he becomes less human and become more of a living shadowy wisp. he becomes more hungry the more along the transformation is, until he figures out what his new form feeds on: the fear others have of the night and of the dark.

-side note: i say fear but it’s pretty flexible. fear, doubt, etc, as long as it’s a Thing the person embodies, they feed off of it. moon’s Person was Imposter Syndrome, who at one point, took the imposter part of it pretty literally

EDIT: i feel like i should describe moon’s meeting with this guy further. moon definitely knew something was up even before they opened their mouth, given that he was talking to his doppleganger

2) i’m not too sure what to do with sun. i’ve been juggling the idea of him becoming the emissary of a god! he gains powers, and in return, helps them with their duties and whatever tasks they assign him. i’ve been bouncing him as emissary of the moon or as emissary of the hunt

if he’s the emissary of the moon, he actually performs duties more related to the sun inside. the god of the sun is dead (which is why there’s a Big Fucking Ice Age and why a majority of humans live underground now), and the only person who can take over is the god of the moon, who’s doing a shit job at it since the sun is not under his domain and control

sun is going to struggle taking over the god of the moon’s solar duties though, since the powers he gets from this is related to the moon, not the sun

if sun instead becomes an emissary of the hunt (a position i thought of giving to moon a few times), then he hunts people down! it’s not limited to humans, anything that’s alive is free game. at some point, the god of the hunt joins the cycle trio (life, death, rebirth), filling in death’s missing role alongside the navigator (who guides people to rebirth)

[fairy-made]

My lungs are burning and it hurts a lot to cough, I have chills while under blankets OR I overheat and sweat profusely while not covered, my stomach is actively trying to kill me, Im tired as fuck and I’ve had a constant headache throughout all this to top it all off.

I dont feel good. But people are wanting me to get up and play video games w them or come over and hang out. Do people think flu is just like a sparkly common cold that comes with some glitter on the side?????? Im not just coughing and have a fucking runny nose!!!!!! Im not fucking sitting here drawing and playing video games, using this as relaxing me time!!! IM FUCKING EXHAUSTED, AND HAVE BEEN SLEEPING ALL DAY!!! Except to fucking piss and take medicine!!!! I cant even focus on watching a 10min video without getting wiped out midway through???? What the fuck!!!! Leave me alone!!!!!!

[creative-caramel-coffee]

Seldom Self-care Sickness

Prompt: Hopelessly Bad at Self-Care

Pairings: Wandanat x R

Word count: 1.4K

Summary: you were pretty bad at looking after yourself when It came to getting work done. So much so you made yourself sick. But your girls love you all the same.

TW: fever, Flu, non-sexual nudity, implied sexual joke (just one), slight angst, traumatic past (mentioned)

A/N i feel like all my fics are kinda the same thing… im considering opening up requests once i figure out how to…

“honey your going to get sick if you don’t take breaks. love your working yourself into the ground.” Wanda cooed. you brushed the hair from your eyes and went back to work, huffing slightly.

“your probably worse than nat, my love, take a break and we can cuddle.” Wanda tried again.

nat huffed “shes defiantly worse than me at least i take breaks every once in a while.” Wanda shot nat a glare and she went back to typing out her mission report.

you knew they were right, you hadn’t slept or eaten or even stopped to pee lately. work was all you could think about. with the last mission you went on failing you felt the need to prove yourself. after hydra you had always had issues with self worth and work ethic. mainly you didn’t feel you had any. your worked yourself to the bone until your girls picked up the pieces, which they didn’t mind, after all they loved you. you had grown up on the ideology that in order to be valuable and loved you had to earn your keep. of course even a whole year after your rescue the things they taught you were hard to shake off.

“‘m fine wands i need to get this done anyway.” you sighed when she began massaging your shoulders feeling the pent up stress you held in your neck and back. you let your eyes drift shut for a second revealing in the idea of a break before they snapped open and you went back to work. Wanda sighed heavily and retreated back to the bedc to snuggle into nat. every once in a while she shot you a sad look but you huffed and continued writing out the reports.

“baby i brought you some water for a reason. you may want to work but you do need to drink.” Wanda cooed, and you placed down the pen with a bang, emptying the glass while holding Wanda’s eyes the whole time. you wiped you hand over the back of your mouth, replaced the glass on the table and picked up the pen again. Wanda sighed knowing you had at least had some water now which she supposed was better than nothing at all.

she had just began to doze off against Nat’s thigh when a sneeze startled her awake. you grinned sheepishly and waved a hand.

“Pollen count.” you said dismissively and Wanda shot a pointed look at the closed window.

“baby-“

“I need to work.” you cut her off.

“what you really need is to rest.” nat said without looking up from her own report.

“why don’t you harass Natasha for a bit Wanda.” you huffed the room feeling uncomfortably warm.

“because i know when to stop, unlike you.” nat shot back without any malice.

Wanda sighed and began to lazily trace patterns on Nat’s thigh which shivered under her touch. slowly she began to fall asleep again. only to, once again be woken by a sneeze. followed by another three. when you had stopped Wanda raised an eyebrow. she stood up wand walked over to your desk. hands on her hips. “right thats enough, come to bed or i’ll make you, your going to get sick one way or the other now and i don’t need you to be writing nonsense with a high fever.” upon closer look she saw the slight shaking you body was doing, open betrayal.

“right.” Wanda said sounding frustrated at your lack of response. swiftly she laid the back of her palm on your forehead before you could react she tutted.

you moaned at the feeling of cool skin against your fevered face, which felt like a fire was brewing. under your skin.

Wanda’s eyes went wide “baby.” she scolded “you have a fever, no wonder you don’t feel good.” she sighed using her hand to draw the sweaty hair from your face. her fingers tangling in the knots.

nat appeared by her side. she put one hand under your knees and another on your back as she scooped you up bridal style. she was concerned at your lack of protests as she did so and shot Wanda a worried look that was quickly returned. how had you gotten sick so fast? carefully Natasha deposited you on the bed and Wanda went to find a thermometer.

Nat brushed the hair from your face and your eyes fluttered shut in content.

“honey, you need to look after yourself better” she cooed her fingers carding your hair backwards.

“alright.” Wanda said reappearing with a small thermometer. “open” she said tapping a finger on your jaw. you glared but complied.

“good girl.” Wanda said using a finger to close your still open mouth after she slipped it under your tongue.

Wanda hummed and rummaged through the cupboards to find some medicine. “just in case your fevers high we might give you some medicine or even a shower.” your eyes lit up making her chuckle

“not that kind of shower my sweet. save that for when your better.” she winked. you slumped against Nat’s shoulder.

“aww your too cute when you pout baby.” she cooed. the thermometer beeped and she carefully took it out when you faced her. holding it away from you and Nat she read off the number.

“102.7” she said frowning at it. “baby thats too high.” she sighed.

“love you go start the shower and i’ll bring her in when your ready.” nat said as if you weren’t there. which in some ways you weren’t, your eyes had taken a glossy effect as you stared into space. but at the word shower you began squirming in Nat’s lap.

“shh shhh shhh” she cooed in your ear. “it’ll be ok, Wanda and I will be with you the whole time.” you knew from past experience how much a fever shower sucked and were under no compulsion to have another. nat scooped you up as Wanda called from the bathroom, the sound of running water coming through the door. you stopped wriggling in Nat’s arms and succumbed to your torture. going limo as nat shot you a sad look as if she felt sorry for you and you began pouting again.

“shh bubs its alright”

carefully she peel off your sweat soaked clothes and passed your shaking form to Wanda who set your feel down and pulled you flush to her front.

“aww its ok my sweet.” she cooed, running her hands through your wet hair. after a few minutes the shaking was less and Wanda was satisfied you weren’t as warm anymore, they helped you out of the shower. you were still clinging to Wanda while Nat dried you off with a fluffy towel. she helped you step into a pair of fluffy pj pants and into one of Wanda’s shirts. after you were dressed Nat carried you back to the bed so Wanda could get dressed herself.

carefully she set you down and pulled the thermometer out of the draw where Wanda had stashed it earlier.

“open up bubs.” she cooed and you did so with sad eyes.

you were nestled in a mountain of pillows when Wanda remerged and you made grabby hands for her. nat was laid by one side and Wanda by the other, you placed your cheek on her thigh and after a second your eyes drifted shut.

the beep surprised you and you felt Wanda’s fingers remove the stick from your mouth. she looked down at it and sighed.

“101.2 better but still not good.” Wanda looked at Nat who gestured to you, who was half asleep and struggling to keep your eyes open against Wanda’s thigh. you would close them before opening them suddenly only to blink for a few seconds before they slide shut again.

“go to sleep my love. we’ll be here. we’ll keep you safe.” Wanda cooed as Nat ran her hands through your damp hair.

the feeling of her fingers on your scalp drew you to sleep and soon the girls smiled at the soft snores they could hear coming from their tired and sick girlfriend.

MASTERLIST

[inanimateinsanitymephone]

are you comfortable explaining why you stopped posting for a while? /gen /nf

okay uh, thank you for this ask.

i dont want to explain too much, (especially on this account) because its mostly private. but i can vaguely explain a few things.

im a disabled, mentally ill child in texas. i have trouble getting around in school now, and i dont live in the nicest household. my mental health has heavily declined recently and i have lost most of my friends over the last month or two.

yes, i draw a lot, and yes, i have a lot of free time. that doesnt give me motivation to answer stuff here though. thank you guys for not pressuring me on that.

im currently sick (i dont know with what?? probably the flu) and was like “why dont i just do asks instead of doodling rn” so i did. and now im back. probably.

also, i run an object camp, so that probably isnt helping anything. (join now!! heres the link!! /j)

umm but yea sorry for the rant but you asked for it

[vampzzi]

DESTRESSER

Keegan P. Russ x Female reader

cw; sex, creampie, pretty vanilla sex for now, fuck friends trope, some slight keegan x ghost there LMAO IM NOT SORRY, this is poorly written cause I feel terrible, overstimluation, not beta read cause im gonna vomit someone call the ER pls

author's note: snippet to an upcoming fic if i ever get to fucking finish it with this damn flu. Fic is called "White Noise" I HATE THIS SNIPPET SO BAD BRO.

It had been a long day of nothing but extreme pressure and too much movement, he worked well under severe pressure but it gets so repetitive. He needed a destresser and fast, you. You lay soundly on the bed with headphone covering your ears as you scroll through your phone, he knew you well more than anyone hence knowing you’d been wanted to have sex with him for a while. 

This whole thing between you two wasn't a relationship, you were friends? Doing friend things but he swore you said you guys were a couple. Couple or not, he didn't mind infact he had a thing for you, you were a pretty little thing , mouthy but also quiet. He loved the sass, pulling himself out of the thought of you and getting his hands on the real thing.

His geared head laying on the plush of your eyes as you looked down at him and smiled, Keegan was laying on your thighs with his shirt off and only his head mask and pants with an unbuttoned belt. “Hi Keegan '' taking your headphones off and sitting them aside on the nightstand. 

“Hi” he purred as he kept his head between your thighs, he felt safer when he was around you and only you. “Stressed out?” he let out a mhm and you smiled lifting your thighs up and away from his head as he sat up and looked at you, his glaze feeling like a snow storm as a smirk tugged at the corner of your glossed lips. “You should have just said that from the beginning”

“Care to tell me about your day? The visit through the forced ceremony ``''Of course dear” He leaned up against the headboard looking through the mask he wore on his face as his stormy azure colored eyes.

Your eyes are so pretty” you breathe out and you see his eyes flutter as you smile and place yourself on his lap as he wraps his arms around your body, the intimate moment being a moment of silence as he keeps you close with no words. “It was chaotic..” he starts off as he takes his shirt off you as he loved the way it clung to the body and how pulling it off your scent clung to the fabric, the strong smell of sweetness held him in a trance. 

Throwing the shirt to the side as he stared at your bra covered chest “And then, it was me, Ghost, Soap, Price and I believe Gaz was there..” trailing in and out as he was more focused on wrapping his around your plush body and unclipping the bra, pulling it off slowly as he held eye contact with you as you swallowed hard as he could hear it, running his fingers up and down your shoulders, holding one of your bras in his hand and kneading and squeezing it.

Watching him fond your chest as he shifted under you and feeling the solid of something against your ass as you immediately registered it was hard cock against the plumpness of your ass. “Tons of something and people being loud there, girls were booing at Ghost for some reason and wanted more Soap. If only they knew” Keegan chuckled as he ran his finger down your atlas to your nipple, moving his finger over right onto the nipple as he pinched it between his rough morphed hands, all the cuts and grooves could be felt as he pinched your nipple, drawing an longing moan from your saliva covered lips.

“A girl threw a soda bottle at my head when I was forced to talk so that was fun” you scowled about that, like what the fuck? What are you throwing shit for, dumb bitch. Keegan filled the air with his laughing as he brought kisses down to your collarbone and held you closer to him by the hips.

“I’m alright through now, chill out name” he teasingly pulls you off his lap as he unzips his pants as you push your panties to the side as positions shift as you get into his spot on all fours as he holds a death grip to your thighs, as he runs his cock over your soaked folds listening to the sweet sounds that came out of it.

 “A-And fuck then, we listened to boring speech about politics and a bunch of boring shit.” he rolled his eyes as he pushed into you and you hissed from the feeling, his cock sliding into you with ease as he was shieled inside you quicker than normal. He leaned his head back at the way you clutch and pulse against his cock.

Your insides were soft like a pillow for his cock to fuck into, he was pretty much tired of soiling Ghost’s pillows with his cum and him yelling at the others for it.

“Which of you are fucking my pillows?” Ghost says as the others look at him as if he’s lost his mind “Are sure it’s not you Ghost?” Soap smiled mischievously at his silly remark “ha ha Soap, but if it was me. I wouldn’t be asking you guys” the two males going back and forth when in reality it was me the entire time. Ghost was an interesting person and he rarely slept so it only felt fair?

“Mmm, Keegan move please” your head is laid against the pillow while your back is arched and your ass is up in the air while his cock rests into you and he holds on the headboard. Before thrusting into you , drawing out a shaky moan out of your lips “Price also treated us to a  Night of Beer but when we got there, we had to pay for our drinks. He continued thrusting his cock into your pussy as he kept a steady pace as his hips slapped against your ass, his balls heavy and sticky from hitting your clit.

“I had this whiskey mix, it was pretty good. I liked the burn, it reminded me of you” the warm feeling in your body washing over you as he said that, this whole thing between you two wasn't a relationship but you treated it as if it was one. The way he fucked into you had you thinking this more than some “quick sex” each way he’d drag his hips and plunge right back into you, the feeling was words that you couldn’t even describe or be put into a comprehensive sentence. 

“Shit…”  he yelled out as he held onto you as you buried your face into the pillows to muffle any loud sounds as you couldn’t as he hit your cervix and you could see the light as you screamed out and Keegan looked down at you, tears running down your cheeks as you hadn’t realized you were squirt. Dragging his cock out of you as he let the rest splash everywhere as he slapped against your clit to help you overcome the orgasm as it only pushed you into another quick orgasm. 

Coughing and cursing into the pillow as your hole clenched around nothing until he was fucking into your cunt again, only focused on his own pleasure as he grunted and tried to keep talking “I drunk a ton of whiskey, like a fuck ton. Some of the other members checked on me to see if I was alright but really I was ready to come back to you.” 

 You couldn't anything, no sentences, no sounds or anything as you felt a whole sound bomb had been dropped on you, you did hear the loud ass noises of him holding the bed frame as it still hit against the wall as he fucked into you faster. “I sometimes feel like I’m wasting your time being here” he grunted out as he moaned and kept fucking you. Lifting your head up as you cried out from the feeling of him cumming inside you “I l-love having you here” as your head hits the pillows again.

He smiles and rubs your back “Thanks Doll, let me help you get cleaned up”.