#im being brave about it a lot though.
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ok so. my problem is that i have nothing to do in my life besides being glued to screens at all times and don't really have anything i could do besides that. like i genuinely do not own any physical objects i could interact with besides these. i cannot hang out with people as much as i'd like to (but i take every opportunity to go anywhere with them) and finding new friends is hard because i'm overly friendly and i want to involve people in everything at first and some people just want me as a distant friend they sometimes wave at or dont really care about me and im over there bothering them until they cut contact (thats fine by me too). AND it's like, i genuinely have ZERO clue on what to even do right now. like yeah sure "turn off your devices and do something else" but i genuinely have nothing. and im overly depressed from the devices to do anything anyways. so like??
#its been somewhat hard to write this down because its like a lot of truth in it#this is like. actual personal shit. not tumblr regular post personal shit. but personal personal now#tumblr can know it but nobody else#that i admitted to this#cuz idk i feel gross right now like. yeah just go out to the park and sit there or whatever. do that and then you'll be happy or whatever#dude i am being targeted by people in this city. like forreal. some people want me sleeping with the fishies. well not really but like#cause me harm and shit like that. like im well-known here for being crazy.#i cant just go into a gathering and then find people i'd get shoo'd away from there#not gonna lie this is like. a bad situation.#im being brave about it a lot though.
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The thing that kills me about the Star Wars prequel trilogy and why I will die on my hill that my problem is not that Star Wars is a tragedy, its that its a badly written tragedy, is that Anakin Skywalker was at his closest to being a good Jedi when he was ten years old.
#im not an anakin apologist by any means because I get the point of his character and Im not pro or anti jedi#my only real opinion on all of it is similar to what I was saying about Peter and Tony and the MCU yesterday#its badly written. its EVERYONE being contorted into shapes that dont make a ton of sense in service to#getting characters to where they need to end up for certain things to occur#my opinion is not that Anakin is inherently bad or good or that the Jedi are inherently bad or good#its that their entire conflict was set in motion by forcing the Jedi to act in ways that felt massively OOC when they were#first interviewing him as a kid and like.....I ACCEPT that the Jedi are supposed to be for the most part kindhearted and empathetic and all#of that which is why its so noteworthy in my opinion that this does not match with how they were FORCIBLY portrayed in those early movies#in order to ENGINEER the idea that this kid in desperate need of support but already with a lot of good instincts and positive traits#came to the order of kindly supportive literal empaths and everything went downhill from there#like kindly supportive literal empaths would not in my opinion look at a kid trying his best to be brave & stoic in completely intimidating#circumstances and surroundings and be judgmental and fairly dismissive about it as though theyve never met a kid before let alone a#traumatized one and the fact that thats kinda what happened is in contrast to how a lot of pro anakin people frame that NOT proof#that the Jedi order are inherently bad its that in that key scene and multiple others#the Jedi order were BADLY WRITTEN in pursuit of one pre-determined outcome that mattered more to the script/Lucas than#being true to their core conceit and characterizations. and thats just one example out of dozens I could list and the same holds true for#anakin's side of things so thats why I always steer far away from SW discourse#because Im like the problem with the characters in terms of the most iconic arc is not really any of the characters so much#as the plots refusal to let them actually consistently BE characters rather than just fixed and contrived stepping stones on the way to#the desired endpoint
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why do my AM posts keep getting notes btw its been a while since i talked about it and i dont like to pay attn to trends. did someone make a tiktok about ihnmaims or whatever
#labz.txt#i have a lot of thoughts about the common threads harlan ellison stories have and how they relate to the way he was written though#it drives me up the wall to see people read ihnm reductively but im being so brave abt it#AMposting
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read the scratch upd8. little too close to home
#tw vent#in tags at least#when i was reading hs like 3 ish years ago i related a lot to vriska and terezi cause i was in what i think was a really destructive#friendship qpp thing with my best friend online and a boy who liked both of us but mostly her.i was incredibly isolated irl as was my friend#and all my other online friends. i really should have seen that something bad could happen but i didnt and i got into a really deep#depression for like 3 months after but. my dearest friend girl decided to start befriending a 30 yo man and i. like an idiot. followed her#like a lovesick puppy even though all the warning bells were going off. we were in a gc with him that we texted in at all times of the day &#night and we shared selfies and dreams and our daily problems with isolation or hw or whatever. he got more and more creepy and my dearest#friend lashed out at him because she was scared while i sort of stopped talking as much because i was scared but. he still talked to me lots#in dms. he talked shit about the authority figures in our lives and isolated us from our ither online friends he made creepy picrews of me &#my friend getting married and he talked about moving in with us one day. we blocked him but sometimes he still tries to contact me. after it#blew up my friend left me and discord which is probably best and after my depression time i eventually got an irl friend or two but. i never#got over it. he did it to other people too we found out later. he always complimented me on being so sharp and talented and it was nice caus#it was really my first compliment from an adult who wasnt my family and. ig it got to my 14 yo head. anyways. the update made me cry. i had#read that it was bad and knew it would be bad for me specifically cause doc scratch always reminds me of that time in my life but. i didnt#think it would be that bad. i dont blame hs2 creators or anyone else and ig im glad i braved the storm but it was really painful to read#gonna go watch a more light hearted thing now.#if anyone sees this dw ill get over it#anyways. believe the warnings this update is very triggering and you can skip it if you want#glad i have like 5 followers rip
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I think the most surprising thing about svsss is that it seems like it might pass the bechdel test
#svsss liveblog#this is unexpected! im pleased!#i guess since the original novel was supposed to be a harem novel that means there are a lot of female characters#which means now that the harem is Not happening theyre free to talk about things that aren't the male lead#shoutout to sha hualing for being part of most of these conversations#i NEED her to have toxic yuri with liu mingyan#though i think my favorite female character so far is ning yingying#i like that her original character was supposed to just be the sweet little shimei love interest that gets in trouble a lot#and now that the story has been changed she gets to actually develop into a well rounded character#she's strong willed and brave and i love her
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did SO much grinding in fontaine last night that i’ve now earned enough to hit exactly 50 pity in my furina pulls we are GETTING there baybeeee
#genshin impact#furina bbygirl i would do anything for you (underwater exploration)#i feel a LOT better about making sure i get her now since im also on guaranteed#since welkin events the shop reset etc etc will be able to get me there#i just have a FEELING that she’s going to show up really late#i just KNOW it#ive only ever hit 80 during my very cursed cyno pulls and i just feel like furina will do that to me too smh#it’s fine though even if i can’t get her on day 1 of her banner since i’ll keep grinding#and i have time😤😤#just gotta keep resisting the urge to pull alhaitham’s c1 because GOD i want to😭😭#but i got his sword and i need to be satisfied with that#i promised myself i wouldn’t go further than the 50/50 with him win or lose#and i am being SO brave about it despite losing#🥲🥲🥲
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misery despair suffering etc etc
#purrs#delete later#two thoughts about separate things both causing the despair. thought / thing number 1 which i think ive talked abt on here many times before#but im saying it again: i am not good at being a friend in the ways my friends need me to be a friend. and in the ways friendship is thought#of societally i guess. i isolate myself constantly. i pull away from the opportunity to get closer with people i don’t know as well. i don’t#text back and then when im finally ready it’s been so egregiously long since it was appropriate for me to respond or reciprocate or#whatever it is i am so crushed by guilt and shame and embarrassment that i can’t bring myself to do it. i have so many unread messages and i#wont even let myself open them. and ive been like this for years. and i hurt someone very badly many years ago by being that way. and it was#more complicated than that but sometimes i remember it and how i acted and how i treated them. and i wonder sometimes if they check up on me#and i don’t want to be immature or weird or whatever for talking about it or wondering that openly. but if you do read this and you know who#you are: i am so sorry. i meant whst i said that i would never stop wishing you well and hoping the very best for you. and i hope you have#all of that and more. and im so sorry for not being brave enough to communicate with you or stick around. i really really am. and im sorry#to all the other people i have hurt by pulling away and shutting down and shrinking inside myself and not talking. ik it’s weird to post#that instead of just telling people directly but it’s the guilt. i am fully aware of how many people / groups of people i owe things to /#for but also just… miss. a lot. and want to talk to even though i won’t let myself. i don’t know why im like this and i don’t know how to#stop. but im sorry im not a good friend or even acquaintance or community member. and im talking to everyone now i guess including anyone#reading this bc god knows how many asks and messages i have on here. im sorry. i want to be a better friend. but i also never have spoons. a#and i also want to stay spoonless and cocooned on myself forever and never come out. and i hate that. i want to be a friend. i want to be#kind and giving and loving and generous in the ways you all have been with me. i want to hang out with people and send messages and be there#to lift people up and celebrate with them. but all i can muster is tapping like on social media and it’s horrific. i have gifts to make and#hello / checking in messages to reply to and roleplay starters to post and i just can’t do it right now and im scared i’ll never be able to#again. but it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. if i say i can’t do it then iwont. it’s not enougu to just be aware of it i have to act on it#and change it. but im exhausted and hurting right now and i have been for years and i need to heal first but what if this is healing.#idk. i rambled on that for much longer than i thought i would so nowim gonna say the second thing in a separate post. and it’ll be weird to#post about that in light of this and it’ll be weird to post this at all. but its been weighing on me so heavily today and i don’t want#anyone to think im ignoring them or not aware of being like this or whatever. and posting into the void is easier than telling individual#people to your faces even though i know it’s cowardly. im really truly sorry. i will try to get better once i have the strength to try.#actually yeah no not gonna say the second thing yet. it would be weird to say it now. this needs to sit a little first
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sighs. okay tmi posting sorry guys
#lunar bunny chatter#my horniness has been fluctuating the last day or so and it's definitely because of my period. this morning was crazy#i went to some DMs to listen to an audio message i got and i just died again and thought about some stuff which led me back onto tumblr#and i just went to look at some text posts and now that i look back. dude i have such an atrocious daddy/mommy kink it's actually funny#i mean. i really like the idea of being an appealing figure and my criteria for who i call daddy is so specific. there's just two people#that fall into that category but i don't like the other person as much as the other one. hi sorry for being gay i need this off of my chest#also hanging out with some friends and im so bad at comebacks and all that. how the fuck am i gonna top without stuttering and fumbling#and forgetting words.... that's my biggest worry. it doesn't help that i get super chatty when nervous but maybe i can work it in my favor#i wanna try out the title stuff just to test the waters before going absolutely ham. maybe as a cute joke i'll go “oh sure w/e u say daddy”#“lol haha” but it just seems real fun. i think it's hot too but. yeah it's a lot to unpack ahaha.#i still have a lot of guilt for talking dirty and being more brave when talking but that's just because i always felt like i didn't have...#the right to explore that especially when a lot of people i knew back then thought of me as “pure and innocent girl” and like. yeah fuck no#this was a really meandering ramble but my point: “daddy hot mommy hot i wanna explore that and im also nervous about stuff”#i do genuinely enjoy when i get in the mood though especially with someone i trust and like. click with? i hope that isn't too much to say#but it feels very natural and i don't have to force or hide anything. i just need a bit more confidence ahaha#that's all the rambling i got in me im gonna listen to some classic music from latin artists because im silly and mildly sentimental rn.
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Mystery pick a card (Some 18+)
Since I did a tarot reading poll for my next tarot reading. lets get the rest of the stuff out of my drafts and reach whoever whenever divine pleases. all different type of questions. some 18+, some not. choose what pile you feel intuitively drawn too.
if you fount it on 10/20-21 24 feel free to vote on the poll for the next reading: https://www.tumblr.com/astrow0rldx/764872633973145600/a-tarot-reading-poll-%E0%AD%A8-%E0%AD%A7?source=share
One
18+ who wants to fuck you?
people probably know them. they are very confident, bold, brave. self assured. they are very wishful, they have a lot of ideas. they could be hopeful, and faithful for big dreams. they could be a person who's naturally inspired, or just carries themself that way. looking for purpose. not really immature energy though, like they seem actually goal-oriented and grounded and serene. this person could make money and actually be well known. they might have a busy life or a lot of eyes on them, like they wake up with a purpose, ideas & confidence in their world,shining. leo, sun, solar plexus energy. but also goal-oriented, focused, practical, money getter. receives nice things. the way they may flirt may be cold-hearted, clever, non chalant. if charming then not too vulnerable. could even be a little shy, have anxiety. or maybe traps in their own head when talking, arguing, etc. so maybe quiet. i don't see them as this optimistic person all the time, they could be very down. maybe a lot of loss hopes. maybe focusing on the bad. could be a person to be like awnn im so sad, so they get inspired to find purpose. they find purpose in themself, and their character and life. you could know them for getting through things. like this person could be strong, a wounded healer. signs: leo, cancer, thick hair, ginger hair, nature, fairy/mermaid, coquette, nighttime, rich, spiritual, moon, been in jail, popular, famous, pretty/handsome. good sleep schedule. mourning and sad but strong and hopeful. get through it energy.
Two
18+ their sexual fantasy with you?
makeup sex, remove tension, confusion and conflict with sex. even tease you a bit. if you guys were both going through a lot because of the connection, or your personal lives, they want to move in and just protect you. stand strong and live a happy ever after and forget about the bullshit. they definitely have fantasies about you fucking while living together and different places around the house, marriage and children may be involved. this type of sex they want to give you they want it to be deep, or performative something to make their mark, own you and make you realize about them or you two. they fantasize about moments when they have to hesitate and they don't know, like should i make a move or should i not. should we go right now, or should we not. and its just so much adrenaline and passion between you guys. they fantasize about you being their ideal woman. you even dressing up in dresses for them, putting yourself together. and then they get to see you take it off, take it off for you and take control. they fantasize about this being connective sex though, so not them only doing the work by the way, don't be afraid to add force, strength or bratty. they want to get.. THERE. rough girlfriend sex. if not girlfriend, bestfriend with benefits, fuck buddy type of thing.
Three
hyping you up and calling you out?
numerology number 222 - You thrive in partnerships, value emotional connection, and have a strong intuition. traits like : Harmony, cooperation, empathy, and diplomacy. You may struggle to assert yourself, compromise too much, or fear conflict. traits like : Indecisiveness, over-dependence, and passivity.
Signs: Strong Libra, Leo, Scorpio, Fire Signs. Favorite - Nicki Minaj
Social butterfly, Creative/Inner child energy. ADHD? maybe Balanced, makes clear decisions. Popular girl energy tbh, if your not, express yourself! popularity doesn't matter anyways your bright regardless this is about you, not others. Heavy re-invent yourself type of person, no matter if its what you been through, your look/aesthetic-ness. Who you are, what you do, you are transformative.
You are a warrior, Your strong. You been through a lot but it made you stronger & only balanced you out. Courageous! It's like you have the power to conquer anything because you rise from it, with grace & confidence. No one should be able to take control of your way when you decide to take control. Game of Thrones energy, like you could look at yourself as some type of character, angel or you know what I mean, it adds to your ego & personality about the stuff you went through. Like this is my goddess, I have faced hardship and became a strong, balanced, warrior with angel wings because of that. You are balanced, wise, & fair. You can make clear, rational decisions. Resilience - the capacity to withstand or to recover quickly from difficulties. You can re-invent your self, and shine in your character. You are radiant, your full of life, and you bring light to everyone around you. Your positivity & energy is magnetic. Success, joy, and happiness is the aura and energy around you, embrace it and feel it.
Your like this clear, smart, rational person who shines bright and has this positive inner child energy about them. You have a lot of energy, and adaptability. Always on the go, always on the move, facing things, experiencing and going through stuff, or just being that way as your personality. Like Momentum is on your side, you move with speed & purpose. Push forward!!!
Four
how to get to your desired reality?
signs - National Olympics Games, Spelling bees, Swimming, NBA/NFL, Competitive things. Competitive work place/friend group/family. song: Candy Man, Planez by Jeremih. book: 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene.
you may want to get away with something. wish you can take something. have a little secret. be a thief, manipulator, sneaky, rebel. something hidden that you want to get away with. this could involve a relationship or another thing you can desire in your life is a relationship. maybe a dynamic of earth sign fem/water sign masc. energetically, a woman who’s stable, has all her material desires, thriving in the physical & reality. with a emotional, caring, loving, mature man. with the 8 of cups outside of that and 7 of swords before you might have sneaky things going on in the relationship that you might want to leave behind. or you might want to leave a relationship for another person. or leave with this person. this could be another desire in your life to just maybe leave something behind, and move on from something.
you probably miss your innerchild. you miss someone you were in the past. a era in your life before. you want enjoy life, take the innocence and playfulness, the creativity & kindness of it all. you probably wish you had more integrity, more real, more logical. you probably wish you were more of a warrior, stronger, control things when it’s unfair. wish you had justice. you wish you were smart, straightforward, and had clarity, can understand things faster and see things through. better communication skills. work hard, you wish you can have consistency and persistence. good work. learn faster. wish you were good in school and your matters pertaining to your education, work, legal matters and children.
YOU GOT TO HAVE FUN THIS WORLD IS YOURS. GET SOME CONFIDENCE AND BRAVERY. take down your haters. make it through any competitive shit and stand on your throne. you control your reality, you manipulate the situation. you gain the control and the power. that means you decide when stuff is done, you leave stuff behind that doesn’t serve your best. and be in peace. SAVE and NOURISH and RESPECT & VALUE your peace. PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE put your respect and values to the right things and PEOPLE. your peace can help you understand your wishes and your values and your hopes. and help the tooth fairy to come and help you get it and gain control over the situation. meditate. and WIN 🥇
all you have to do is realize something and have the right discernment and judgement. crumble what doesn’t serve you even if it’s chaotic. bond with the right people and go to/make genuine connections. and that can help you unblock something in you to get here.
Five
How to get to your desired reality?
(same question for pile four)
signs - “Just Do it” Nike. Gigi Hadid, Victoria Secret Modeling, Makeup, Pink. Sexy (Red and Black). Red Room. Leather, Black Boots. Blonde Ponytail. Tumblr Feminine Culture. Female Gaze. Fake Friends. Popular Girl Clique. McDonalds. 4 for $4. Song: Pretty Hurts by Beyoncé. Sippy Cup by Melanie Martinez.
okay you ready to see your work that you put in, the time and investment finally make you satisfied. you probably been holding on to some burdens but your ready for a new life a new beginning something fresh. your ready for the heavy book bag to be off your shoulders life to stop kicking your ass and you can innocently walk into something new. you put in the work and your just waiting till the plants grow and you are thriving and the voids are filled. the happiness and everything you want is there. maybe something that you been wanting to start that you been investing in, caring about is something you see as a fulfillment.
you wish you were more abundant, you wish you were more lucky, you wish you were more physically wealthy. you can receive your wants more easily. you wish you were more of a person that receives good karma and fate. you wish you were emotionally stable and mature and looked at the world differently. and were a better and stronger person to achieve and accomplish.
Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and celebrate. emotionally go forward and connect with people. But be guarded and self assured. start being kind of selfish and more connected back with self. holding on to things valuing things. be more energetic fast and about that action. start moving and starting. start DOING.
you might have body insecurities. you might have insecurities about your luck and fate. insecurities about time. insecurities about your learning abilities, your studies, your goals and ambitions. insecurities about your emotional well-being, your depression, looking on the down side. insecurites about your procrastination, persistentence, and future. your material stability. your plan and progress your path.
#pick a card#pick a deck#pick a photo#pick a pile#pick a picture#18+ pac#pac reading#pick a card reading#pick a crystal#pac tarot#daily tarot#tarotcommunity#tarot cards#18+ tarot#tarot#tarot community#tarot reading#tarotblr#tarotdaily#tarot deck#tarot witch#astrology community#astrology notes#astro observations#asteroid astrology#astro community#astro placements#astro posts#astroblr#astrologer
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shy girl (eddie munson x fem!reader)
summary: typically shy, you aren't good at telling eddie what you want. finally brave enough to ask, eddie happily rewards you
cw: 18+!, mature language, petnames, smut, pinv sex (unprotected), creampie, anal fingering, shy/nervous first time anal reader idk, lots of praising, porn with very little plot an: wrote this a while ago and was suppose to be a 3 part butt stuff saga lol but i probably won't do the other 2 parts if im being honest. makes sense alone, theres just clearly a segue for the other parts at the end. kind of edited but not really. wc: 3.6k+
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Your stomach clenches, whole body quivering with nerves.
“Y’okay?” he asks from behind you, finger just barely brushing over the focus of tonight.
“M’okay,” you answer tentatively.
“You don’t sound okay?”
“I want to do this,” you say with an exhale, forcing your muscles to relax. You drop the side of your head further into the plushness of the pillow, back arching deeper as you breathe away the low vibrations of your nervousness.
His hands rise up your lower back, palms flat to your skin. “You don’t have to.” He glides both thumbs up the sides of your spine before rounding them outwards, massaging an achy spot you didn’t know existed. You relax into it, taking another breath.
“I want to, Eddie. Wanna try it.”
His thumbs return to the base of your spine before gliding upwards, doing it all again. You could fall asleep if he kept doing this— but you don’t. You push yourself up, craning your neck to see him perched behind you on his knees. His eyes flicker up from the movements of his hands on your lower back to meet your gaze.
“Eddie, I’m serious. I want to try it,” you convince, eyeing him. His naked chest glistens in a faint sheen of sweat under the warm light of the bedroom, courtesy of the ample foreplay that brought you both here. His disheveled hair is further proof of how the night has gone. He raises his brows, showing off the sincerity in his widened eyes, hands paused on your skin.
“If it’s just for me, I’m fine with how we usually have sex— I love your pussy,” he smiles crookedly.
Worked up, bare, his cock already hard, and so close to your soaked entrance— it would be easy to give in and let him fuck you stupid, but you prepared for this, you thought endlessly about this, you want this.
“I’ve never done anal before though, wanna try it at least once.”
His hands resume their movements, this time gliding down and over the roundness of your ass. His thumb brushes over where you want him.
“You sure?” he asks.
“Yes, Eddie. Please.”
“It’s gonna take a while if you don’t want it to hurt. We coulda been warming you up if you told me earlier.”
Your back arches deeper as you deflate, pressing your face forward into the pillow. You knew Eddie had more experience than you, you knew he’s done this before with other people, but you didn’t know how to bring it up. It was only in the heat of the moment when you managed to let the words slip from the tip of your tongue despite planning to say them at the beginning of the evening. At least this time you got the message out, last time you got ready for this, you chickened out on telling him what you wanted and went without.
Eddie brushes his thumb over your hole again before traveling down to your cunt, dipping into your wetness. Shallowly, he circles his thumb in your entrance.
“Shoula told me earlier, pretty girl,” Eddie says and your stomach drops with disappointment. You know you should have, you told him too late and now you have to wait again.
His thumb pulls out from your cunt, trailing upwards.
“Shoulda told me earlier, cause now I’m all worked up and need you— but you’re shy, aren’t you?” His voice drops to a low rasp that makes your disappointment vanish, heated excitement taking its place. “My shy girl, too nervous to tell me she wants me to fuck her in the ass.”
The warmth of your slick on his thumb circles around your puckered hole lightly, teasingly.
“Are you my shy girl?” he asks.
You nod your head, the sound of ruffling cotton on your pillowcase acting as your response. You know Eddie doesn’t appreciate your lack of a real answer when his thumb stops it’s movement.
“Yes, I’m your shy girl,” you say quickly, wanting him to keep going.
“Good girl. My good, shy girl,” he hums. His thumb resumes circles before gliding right over your hole, adding increasing pressure that has your stomach squeezing. You hum happily, enjoying it so far but it doesn’t last for long when he removes both hands from you.
“Touch yourself, baby. Want to see your fingers in your pussy while I get your ass ready for my cock,” he says and your stomach flips.
“Touch myself?” you ask.
“Too shy to touch yourself f’me?” he asks, amusement laced in his voice. You hum, turning your head briefly into the pillow to hide, before taking a breath.
“No,” you reply, the bashfulness of your voice telling both of you otherwise. You bravely snake a hand under your body, holding your hand flat over your mound.
“That’s a good girl, let’s see you sink your little fingers into that pretty cunt.”
Hot and wet, your fingers glide in easily, an audible squelch of wetness sounding out that makes your skin heat from your neck all the way up to your cheeks. Eddie groans from behind you and it gives you the confidence to pull your fingers out, starting a slow pump.
“Thatta girl, keep doing that,” he praises and you hear the mattress shuffle behind you.
You turn your face to see Eddie but when you catch his gaze, he pointedly looks towards your cunt, reminding you with a raised brow to keep going. He shuffles off the bed, moving to the bedside table. Seconds later, with a clear bottle in hand, he crawls back into the bed, moving to sit behind you again.
With the pop of a lid opening, your fingers pause as your mind’s focus shifts to what Eddie’s doing.
“Keep going baby,” he's quick to prompt. “Just gonna warm up some of this lube in my hands and we’ll get you started, okay?”
“Okay,” you reply meekly, making slow wiggles of your fingers inside of yourself, movements far too shallow and tame to get yourself off.
“Gotta relax baby, focus on playing with yourself,” he guides as you hear the slickness of the lube being rubbed between his hands. He finally makes contact between your cheeks, rubbing the warmed up liquid over you.
You try to continue plunging your fingers in and out of yourself but your attention wanes as the pads of his fingers rub circles over your hole.
You resist the nervousness that threatens to creep in. It’s not that you don’t trust Eddie. You trust him more than yourself, it’s just new and you’re not sure what to make of it yet.
“Can you tell me what you’re doing?” you ask shyly.
A gentle palm meets your lower back again, warmth spreading over your skin as he rubs soothingly. An appreciated affection that calms your nervousness.
“’Course, baby,” he answers. “Just getting you ready and lubed up. The slicker you are, and the more relaxed you are, the easier it’ll be.”
You hum an agreement, trying your hardest to focus on fingering yourself. You start building a steady rhythm when Eddie’s hand pauses.
“Gonna start small, okay? Just gonna use my little finger at first— see how you like it.”
“Mhm, okay,” you agree. With his one hand still rubbing a soothing massage on your lower back, you feel the prod at your hole, slow and gentle.
“Just, relax,” he hums quietly, “mhm, just like that, baby.” His little finger pushes into the tightness, and your own fingers pause completely as you take a moment to decipher the feeling.
His hand slides from your lower back, down to rest on your hip. His finger pushes in the slightest bit further. When you feel the knuckle of his finger your whole body moves forward, away from the intrusion instinctively.
“Hurts?” he asks, letting you pull away, leaving just the tip of his finger inside you.
You shake your head. It’s not pain, it’s not something you’ve really felt before. “Just feels weird,” you answer, relaxing back towards him.
“Wanna stop?”
“No,” you reply with another shake of your head. “Keep going, please,” you say when he makes no further moves.
He pushes his little finger into you again, knuckle pushing past the band of tightness but this time you don’t pull away, you breath through the odd feeling.
“How’s that?” he asks, stilling his finger inside you.
“Feels… fine? Not bad, just… tight.”
“Yeah, s’really tight,” he breathes. You feel his finger wiggle the slightest bit and it makes your stomach clench from the strange sensation.
“Wanna play with your clit for me? It’ll make it feel better.”
“What are you gonna do now?” you ask, wanting him to talk you through it some more.
“Get you used to this, just go slow, in and out for now,”
Gliding your fingers out from your cunt, wetness gathered between your fingers, you move to make circles on your clit, letting out a breath at the distracting pleasure.
Eddie starts slow movements of his finger, pulling it out before pushing it back in. With your fingers working your clit and the added pressure, you hum a quiet moan.
“Feel good, baby? Like having my finger in your ass?”
“Like it, feels good so far,” you answer, picking up the speed on your clit.
You get so lost in the buzzing throughout your body that Eddie’s words go in one ear and out the other as he guides you through the next step. You almost don’t notice him switching from his little finger to his middle, only when he gets to the knuckle again do you notice the extra stretch. Surprised, despite him telling you what he was doing, a gasp pulls from your lungs and your circles on your clit stutter.
“You okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, just surprised me.”
“Tell me if it starts to hurt, okay?”
You agree and Eddie starts a slow thrust in and out. The feeling is… interesting. It’s like pressure and quite different from when he’s in your pussy.
When his knuckle slips in and out with ease, you feel yourself get excited.
“Ready for more,” you chirp quietly.
“Yeah? Ready for two of my fingers?”
“Mhm, ready for ‘em, Eddie.” Your belly pools with heat just at the idea of two of his fingers inside of you. Your pace on your clit picks up again, having slowed down so you didn’t cum just yet.
He does it methodically, pulling his finger out until just the very tip is left inside of you. Then he adds his second, pushing inside of you so slowly that you nearly feel like pushing back into him— until he gets to the hilt of his knuckles again.
Biting your lip, the stretch is close to being painful and you can’t help the way you tense. Eddie stills.
“My ambitious girl, thought she could take more already. S’hurting isn’t it?”
“No,” you lie unconvincingly.
“No?”
“Just feels like a stretch,” you say, voice coming out squeaky.
“Yeah? Wanna keep going?”
You pause before nodding your head. “Wanna keep going,” you answer, continuing slow circles on your clit.
His fingers prod deeper, knuckles stretching you out and adding pressure. When he finally has both fingers fully inside you, you let out a breath you had held in that clearly you nor Eddie realized you had held in.
“Baby, you gotta keep breathing. If it’s too much, tell me,” he admonishes gently, rubbing his opposite hand along your hip.
“It’s not too much… it’s just different. I want it so bad, Eddie.”
“I’m so fucking hard, you’re not making this easy for me,” he laughs softly.
“I do. I've been thinking about it for a long time. Really want it just didn’t know how to tell you.”
“Sweet, shy girl, you can tell me anything. You know I’d never say no to you,” he says as he starts moving his fingers again. You make a conscious effort to breathe, taking deep inhales and extended exhales.
When he eventually gets you used to his two fingers, the way he twists his wrist with each plunge has you humming in the intimate pleasure. More than anything, the thrill of it all is what has you enjoying this the most. It feels good so far but you need more.
“Eddie?”
“Yeah, pretty girl?”
“Can you…” you trail off, shyness creeping in.
“Can I?” he prompts, slowing his fingers.
“Can you… can you do that but…” you trail off again.
“Anything you want baby, just gotta ask,” he says softly, hand rubbing along your hip still, encouraging you to say what you want to say.
“I want you to do that and fuck me too,” you say in a quick breath.
“Yeah?”
“Please.”
Eddie laughs softly, his gentle massaging hand turns into a quick squeeze. “I can do that, want me to stuff both your hole, fill you right up?” he asks salaciously.
You pussy clenches at the thought and you need it more than anything.
“Please, Eddie.”
He sinks his fingers deep into your ass, making you moan, lighting every nerve up in your body. He shuffles behind you, free hand guiding your thighs wider to accommodate himself.
“Gonna make you feel so full, you want that don’t you? You been thinking about it?”
“Mmhmm,” you hum. “Been thinking about it for so long, Eddie.”
“Gotta tell me these things, baby. Want to know every dirty thought of yours,” he grumbles in a deep baritone. His fingers twist with the movements of his wrist and you feel the prod of his cock as he drags it through your folds, catching your clit before lining himself up.
“Please,” you whisper, pushing back into him. He lets out a low chuckle and he spares you your additional pleas that sit on your tongue as he pushes inside of you.
The stretch of the head of his cock makes you whine and with the addition of his fingers in your ass it’s a fuller pleasure, one that gets more intense as he pushes deeper inside of you.
“Eddie,” you whimper out, dropping your head to the pillow.
“I know baby, s’a lot isn’t it?”
“Feels good Eddie,” you whine, arching your back deeper.
“Yeah? You like being filled up?”
“Love it, Eddie.”
He draws his hips back and your stomach flips just at the thought of the pleasure to come. When he pushes back in, his fingers wiggle inside of you and your breath catches. He does it again and you swear your head goes fuzzy.
He starts slow, his hips thrusting slow and lazily, barely grazing the backs of your thighs with each stroke. His fingers are what makes your breath stutter. He twists them in and out with the swirl of his wrist, and each time he sinks his cock inside of you, it adds unique pressure that has you reeling. Most of all, you like that it’s him doing it— you feel a profound intimacy having him like this that makes your chest squeeze alongside the burn in your lungs from having every breath stolen.
“Want to add another finger,” he says and you let out a drawn out whimper. He coos, rubbing his free hand along the round expanse of your cheek and up to your waist. “I know you can take it, you’re doing so good f’me.”
“I can take it,” you nod into your pillow.
He pulls back from you, enough to have just the tip of his cock inside, and you have to bite your lip to stop yourself from pushing back into him. That feeling vanishes when you hear the click of the bottle lid.
“Just gonna add more lube, okay? Make sure you’re nice and slick for me,” he says in a soothing cadence.
“Thank you, Eddie,” you say. He huffs a quiet laugh and you hear the wet sound of the lube in his hand.
“Don’t gotta thank me, pretty girl. I’m having fun back here,” he chuckles and your heart skips a beat at the thought of him enjoying this. It’s a warm feeling— the shared pleasure, it’s hard to explain but just feels good being together like this.
Pulling his fingers almost all the way out, you feel his other fingers glide around your entrance. When he shifts, you take a deep breath.
“Good girl,” he praises.
His free hand finds your lower back again and the stretch of a third finger starts. It’s a lot this time. A lot more than all the other stretches.
“Just breathe, there you go. Doing so good,” he soothes in a low voice. Feeling a heightened sensitivity, you don’t miss the way his cock twitches and throbs inside of you. While the stretch tinges painful, you focus your attention towards that, feeling the way his excitement kicks up in his cock.
The stretch doesn’t give way to pleasure, but the pleasure comes from somewhere else. Somewhere deep inside where you feel connected to Eddie. You’re his like this, physically but emotionally as well. All his. It makes you throb, and you reach between your legs chasing that feeling.
“Fuck, there you go,” Eddie says, voice turning gravelly. His cock kicks up again and he lets himself push forward, sinking halfways inside of you.
His fingers, just barely past the knuckle, shift inside of your tight hole and it has you lighting up in a searing pleasure— pain speckled but so rewarding when Eddie lets out a deep grunted moan.
“Don’t think I’ll last, baby,” he says in a strangled breath.
“Just fuck me, please. Need it so bad Eddie. Need you.”
He huffs a deep exhale. His hand on your lower back pushes you down into a deep arch and you meld to the way he needs you. His fingers shift again and it’s like fire in your veins. You rub quick circles against your clit and with a deep breath that tickles across your spine as Eddie lets it out, he thrusts.
Guttural and from deep inside of you, you let out a pleasure ridden moaned cry.
He pulls back and rolls his hips to yours.
You’ve never felt so full in your life and you love it. It’s thrilling, it’s connecting, it’s masochistically beautiful, and it pools in your lower belly, making your stomach clench in rigid convulses.
“Fuck, feels so fucking good,” Eddie groans. His breath is heavy and only adds to your pleasure. “You like both your holes being filled don’t you, can feel you squeezing me so tight,” he says in a deep grunted babble.
Your moans surpass their usual shy quietness, and the way your pitch raises is barely within your control. If you didn’t feel so conscious-shatteringly good, you might be embarrassed about how your voice echos off the walls. Normally Eddie’s the vocal one, and even with his drawn out groans, grunts, moans, and dirty talk that choruses alongside your own, you’re undeniably loud and it has Eddie’s thrusts stuttering already.
He presses his fingers downwards inside of you and it’s like something shatters. You’re almost at your climax, but that small movement has his cock pressing perfectly against your g spot, and the stretch, the subtle pain, and the blatant pleasure of your fingers on your clit have your muscles seizing. He thrusts as deep as he can, moving quickly in and out to push you over the edge, and you erupt into shakes that tremor through your body.
Your legs threaten to give out and your head turns foggy with buzzing luxury. His thrusts continue and even with your eyes squeezing shut, your vision gets darker until you see the sparkle of your pleasure peaking through like stars.
Eddie spews moans and grunts after whimpers and curses, and pulling his fingers from your ass, he quickly grabs hold of your hips in a pinching grip. Staying planted in your cunt, he chases you downwards on the bed when your legs finally give out. He follows you, prolonging your high, and finding his own as he fucks you into the mattress.
“Fucking Christ— fuck, fuck,” he grunts, hips slapping heavily to your ass in quick thrusts. The bruising grip he has on you, and the urgency of his broken curses tell you he’s on the edge. He sinks his cock deeply inside of you, convulsing balls pressing against your cunt, and you feel the subtle warmth of his orgasm fill you up. Working himself through his high in shallow thrusts with stuttered grunts, the room is silent as you’re reduced to levelling breaths. You feel as light as air with the pleasure of electricity strumming through every inch of you.
He’s pressed to your back, both of you completely collapsed to the mattress but you need to feel more of him. You shift, reaching backwards, and like he reads your mind he’s already searching for you with an open hand.
He pulls out, rolling to the side and you follow, moving yourself to lay against his chest. His hand in yours, it’s sticky and wet and full of lube but you hold it tight, squeezing it within your own. He squeezes back.
You hum with more satisfaction and good feelings inside your chest than you can communicate. Eddie brings his other hand to your back, rubbing it up and down, replying with his own hum.
“That was really good,” you mumble, leaning your cheek to his sweat damp chest.
“So fucking good,” he nearly growls, the tone of his voice proving the assertion of his truth.
You laugh softly, pressing a kiss to his chest. His heart hammers below your ear and the rise and fall of his chest soothes you, relaxes you.
“My shy girl,” Eddie hums and from the lightness of his tone you know he’s smiling. Feeling brave from your post sex high, you smile to yourself.
“I can’t wait to feel your cock in my ass,” you say. Eddie lets out a deep laugh that vibrates in his chest.
“Not so shy now, huh?”
Cheeks burning with your smile, you shake your head.
“Want to do you too,” you say. You lose a bit of your nerve but the dramaticized gasp you get from Eddie, you know that he knows what you mean.
“You want to do me too?” he laughs.
“Mhm, want to fuck your ass,” you whisper, just barely mustering the courage to say it. You’re rewarded for saying it with smooth, soothing strokes up and down your back, and a chuckle from deep inside Eddie’s chest.
“Who woulda thought my shy girl’d be so dirty,” he says, pulling you even tighter to him, hugging you extra close.
──────────── ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie x fem!reader#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson smut#eddie munson oneshot#eddie munson x fem!reader
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can I please please please request a reverse grumpy x sunshine with theo 😭🙏🏼 i have a horrible cold rn and im pretty sure im getting a fever too and im so so close to my periods and im in some very desperate need for something nice 😭 it's totally fine if you can't or if you're busy, no pressure!
p.s. im in love with your writing! (if it wasn't obvious before)
Show a little loving.
✩ Theodore Nott x F!Reader
The one where a smitten Theodore Nott is willing to do anything and everything to see that smile of yours. It’s only a matter of time before he has to let you know - and the school mandated trip might make that a lot earlier.
A/N: This was so disgustingly cute i actually almost threw up but ig its necessary after 61 letters LOL (also @stardustsymphony ur actually amazing i hope you like it)
songs: Lovers - anna of the north
Theodore Nott had a habit of being too cheerful for his own good, especially in the mornings. You couldn’t figure out how he managed to wake up so early and still be this bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
It was unnatural.
You leaned against the Slytherin common room wall, waiting for your first class of the day, arms crossed and expression set in your usual neutral state. Your friends called it a "resting bitch face," though you insisted it was just your natural look.
Either way, no one seemed brave enough to bother you this early - except for Theo, of course.
"[name]!" His voice rang out from the entrance, and you groaned internally before turning your head to see him practically bouncing down the stairs, his dark hair flopping slightly as he moved.
“Too early for that much enthusiasm, Theo,” you muttered, but you didn’t stop the small smile that tugged at the corner of your lips. He always had that effect on you, no matter how much you tried to resist it.
Theodore didn’t seem fazed. He gave you a wide grin as he plopped down next to you on the stone bench. “It’s never too early! Have you seen outside? It’s perfect weather - I thought we could grab breakfast and maybe sit by the lake before class.”
“Not sure if I’m awake enough for all that,” you grumbled, pulling your cloak tighter around yourself. The dungeons were always too cold in the mornings. “But breakfast doesn’t sound too bad.”
“See? You’re already coming around,” he teased, his voice laced with amusement.
It was a running joke between the two of you. Theo was always the optimist, the 'sunshine' that (much to your dismay) seemed hellbent on making you smile. He was one of your closest friends, so you let him get away with it, though you wouldn’t admit how much you enjoyed his company - or how much his smile did things to your heart you didn’t entirely understand yet.
He nudged your arm gently. “I even asked Mattheo to save you a croissant for breakfast. No need to thank me, though I’ll accept compliments.”
You rolled your eyes but followed him out of the common room, the two of you falling into step as you walked through the corridors. It was easy, the way you fit together. Where you were quiet, he filled the silence with his never-ending commentary on whatever came to mind-whether it was about the latest Quidditch scores or some random thing he noticed about the castle.
Today, it was the latter.
“Have you ever noticed how that one portrait near the Great Hall looks like it’s giving people side-eye? I feel rather judged every time I walk by.” he rambled, feigning hurt as he places a hand on his chest.
You snorted, unable to help the laugh that bubbled up. “No, but now I’m definitely going to look for it.”
“See? I’m expanding your horizons,” he said with a satisfied grin.
You shot him a sideways glance. “Yeah, yeah. Keep talking and you’ll lose your seat.”
He laughed, his eyes crinkling at the edges in that way that always made your stomach flip. “You’d miss me if I wasn’t there.”
You didn’t respond right away, but he wasn’t wrong.
You didn’t know how to describe the way your friendship with Theo felt like it was standing on the edge of something bigger, something neither of you had quite dared to name.
And maybe you weren’t ready for it just yet. But when he sat down beside you, close enough that your knees brushed under the table, you couldn’t help but wonder if he felt it too.
Theodore hummed contentedly as he reached for the little pot of sugar, dumping three heaped teaspoons into his coffee like it was perfectly normal behaviour. The steam rose lazily from the cup, and he stirred it absentmindedly, flashing you that familiar, easy-going smile.
“Have you packed for the astronomy trip tomorrow?” he asked casually, as though he hadn’t just committed a serious coffee crime right in front of you. “Apparently Tromsø is absolutely piss cold at this time of year. Draco was telling me.”
“I’ll help you pack later. Just so you don’t forget something important. Like, I don’t know, an extra jumper for me.”
You shot him a glare. “Sure, Theodore. I’ll just pack your entire wardrobe while I’m at it.”
“Wouldn’t dream of asking,” he replied, grinning again. “Just the scarf, though. You know, my lucky one.”
You snorted. “That hideous green one? Absolutely not.”
“Blasphemy,” he said dramatically, clutching his chest. “You wound me, [name].”
“Good,” You deadpan, turning to look at him.
You raised an eyebrow, eyeing him with something between disbelief and amusement. “God, Theodore-” you chided, pointing at his cup with disgust, “is that not just sugar with a side of coffee?”
"Well someone needs to make up for the clear joy discrepancy in this friendship." He defended, taking a long sip as if to punctuate his point.
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t stop the smirk creeping onto your face. “Right, because your never-ending cheerfulness is the only thing keeping us all from a dark, miserable existence.”
“Exactly!” he declared, entirely too pleased with himself. “I’m performing a public service, really. One smile at a time.”
There was something ridiculously charming about how he just… didn’t care. Theodore was all lightness and laughter, one could argue too much so for a Slytherin.
“I wouldn’t need to drink quite so much sugar if you’d stop glaring at me like I’ve just murdered a puppy.” he teased, bumping your knee lightly under the table. “Honestly, one of these days I’m going to get you to smile before 10 a.m. Just you wait.”
You scoffed, but the warmth in his tone made it impossible to stay annoyed. “You’d have better luck with a Patronus charm.”
"There's a reason why I'm top of the DADA class" Theodore shot back with a cocky grin.
Despite yourself, you felt the corners of your mouth twitching upward, and before you could stop it, a smile crept across your face. Quickly, you took a sip of your coffee to cover it up, but Theodore noticed.
If you saw the way he looked at you, you'd know he was in love then and there. The way he almost melted into your expression, eyebrows almost furrowing as he looks over at you. Just as he opened his mouth, ready to say something - something he wasn’t even sure he was ready to admit to himself- Pansy’s voice cut through the quiet.
“Well, if it isn’t day and night sitting over here,” she chimed, plopping down next to you with a knowing smirk.
“Merlin’s sake, Theo. You’re going to give yourself diabetes.” Pansy’s voice broke through, dry and unimpressed as ever.
“I reckon the sugar’s the only thing keeping him tolerable,” Mattheo said, slouching into his chair and eyeing Theodore’s cup with disdain. “Otherwise, we'd have to listen to him drone on about defensive spells without end.”
You snorted into your coffee before you could help it, the sound surprising you. You couldn't help the laughter that bubbled up, covering your mouth as you shoot Mattheo a glare that was only half-serious. It was loud - unfiltered and genuine, and when you glanced up, you found Theodore staring at you with that easy smile, his eyes warm and a little too soft. Even with Mattheo’s jab at his expense, Theodore couldn’t bring himself to be mad, not when the sound of your laughter was still ringing in his ears.
“Right, like I’d ever come to you for life advice, Mattheo,” Theodore muttered, finally tearing his gaze away from you, though his grin lingered.
Mattheo shrugged lazily. “Probably shouldn't. I’m a terrible influence."
You let the three of them fall into conversation as you zone out, sipping on your coffee. Their chatter faded into the background as your mind wandered, focusing instead on the upcoming trip. The Astronomy class’s trip to Tromsø was all anyone could talk about lately.
And as the pessimist you were, all you could focus on was how damn cold it was going to be.
--
You were right.
It was cold - too damn cold.
As soon as the group stepped off the train in Tromsø, the icy wind cut through your layers like they were made of parchment. You pulled your scarf tighter around your neck, teeth chattering despite the heavy coat you wore.
"Bloody hell," you muttered under your breath, glancing around at your classmates as they all shivered in the bitter chill. "Why did I think this was a good idea?"
"Because it’s Norway, and we’re going to see the Northern Lights," Pansy answered with a 'that's so obvious' tone, bundling herself up in a fur-lined coat that looked like it cost more than your entire wardrobe.
You shot her a look. “I don’t care if we’re going to see dragons dancing in the sky. It’s fucking freezing.”
Pansy only rolled her eyes, linking arms with Lorenzo as they trudged ahead through the snow-covered streets. The rest of your group followed suit- Draco, Mattheo, Blaise, and, of course, Theodore- who was surprisingly unfazed by the weather, despite the hideous green scarf he insisted on wearing.
By the time you arrived at the lodge where you were all staying, your fingers were numb and your patience thin. The lodge was quaint, wooden, and cosily tucked away at the edge of the forest, the surrounding snow-capped trees giving it a 'hallmark christmas' charm.
You all shuffled into the common room, where the housekeeper with a rather large bushy moustache greeted you with thick blankets and far too much enthusiasm for someone who lived in such a cold climate. Everyone split off to their rooms, getting settled before heading out for the evening’s stargazing expedition - one you had organised amongst yourselves. You were sharing a room with Pansy, while Theodore was bunking with Blaise.
Once you'd unpacked, you met the group downstairs again. The fire crackled in the hearth as the others talked about what to do before heading out for the night.
Theodore appeared by your side, leaning casually against the arm of the sofa you were sitting on. "So," he started, that familiar grin tugging at his lips, "what do you want to do?"
You frowned at him in confusion. "Why are you asking me?"
"Because I want to do whatever you want to do," he replied simply, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.
You blinked at him, caught off guard by the sincerity in his voice. "I don't care. I'll just go along with whatever everyone else is doing."
But Theodore wasn’t having it. "You always say that. C’mon, humor me."
Before you could argue, Mattheo walked past and clapped Theodore on the shoulder. "Come on, Nott, stop making her overthink. Let’s go grab some snacks and freeze our asses off while we wait for the lights," he said, and with that, the group started bundling up again, ready to head out into the freezing night.
--
The sky above was almost too perfect - as though it had been plucked straight from a postcard. It almost compensated for the bone numbing chill, the sight of string-light lit stalls far too pretty to make you feel grumpy.
For a while, though.
You trudged along beside Theodore, bundled in so many layers that it felt like your entire body had been wrapped in blankets. The long puffer jacket you wore reached nearly to your knees, and your scarf-wrapped around your neck at least three times-barely left room for your face to peek through. You couldn't help but grumble to yourself, tugging at the edge of your gloves to make sure no skin was exposed to the biting cold.
Theodore, of course, noticed immediately.
"Merlin's beard, you're waddling," he teased. "If you added another layer, you might not be able to walk at all."
You shot him a glare from under your knitted hat. "I'd rather waddle than freeze to death."
He chuckled, eyes flicking over your bundled-up form with an almost too-pleased look on his face. "I don’t know, it’s kind of cute. You look like a disgruntled penguin."
You snorted, half-annoyed, half-amused. "Glad you're entertained."
"Come on," he coaxed, nudging your arm lightly, "I bet under all those layers, you're secretly enjoying this. You’re just too stubborn to admit it."
"Enjoying this?" you asked incredulously, gesturing to the freezing air and the snow-covered ground beneath your feet. "I’m wearing half my wardrobe just to avoid becoming an icicle."
Theodore shrugged, his easy grin never faltering. "Still cute, though."
"You're insufferable, Nott," you muttered, scowling as you slap his arm.
He grinned wider, clearly pleased with himself for pulling that almost-smile out of you.
"Oi! We're gonna go see if we can get some hot chocolate and blankets before we set up for the evening, You guys just guard our spot before someone else grabs it." Blaise yells from a short distance, and Theodore nods as you groan. You wanted to be in the cosy warm lodge - not out here on an isolated ledge in the middle of god-knows where whist your friend traipse around the quaint markets.
You look up, momentarily stunned as the half sarcastic curses that were about to escape your mouth dry out on your tongue. Ripples of greens and blue entwine, seamlessly dancing through the dark that otherwise shrouded the night-sky. It wasn't magic, only charged particles from the sun colliding with gases in Earth's atmosphere, causing them to emit light in vibrant colors, typically seen near the polar regions (courtesy of muggle book you had read on the journey here) but it was nonetheless enchanting.
Surprisingly, your voice broke the silence. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”
Theodore nodded, eyes fixed on you. “Yeah… it really is.”
There was a brief silence, and when you glanced over, you found Theodore watching you instead of the sky, his expression soft.
“What?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.
He shrugged, still smiling. “Nothing. Just trying to figure out how to make you smile.”
You huffed, turning your gaze back to the sky. “Why do you care so much?”
“Because I like seeing it,” he said simply, his voice so sincere it made your stomach flip.
You didn’t respond, the weight of his words lingering in the cold air between you. After a moment, he sighed dramatically, throwing his hands up in mock defeat. “I’ll have to try harder, then.”
“You’re impossible,” you muttered, though your tone was more fond than irritated now.
He chuckled, his laugh low and warm. “And you’re stubborn.”
You turned to chastise him, ready with another quip, but the words faltered when you looked up at him. The moonlight caught his features- soft shadows dancing across his sharp jawline, his eyes gleaming with that look that you had seen far too often these past few weeks. His scarf, that hideous green thing, was crooked as always, the ends flapping slightly in the breeze.
Your hands moved instinctively, reaching up to fix it. "This scarf..." you started, your voice trailing off as you focused on straightening it.
Theodore’s gaze never faltered as he watched you, his eyes tracing every detail of your face as if committing it to memory. "You know, I’m not sure if you actually hate the scarf or if it’s just an excuse to keep touching me."
You scowled, though the heat rising in your cheeks betrayed you. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you mumbled, but even you could hear the wavering in your voice.
His smile widened, but he didn’t say anything more, just stood there.
Before you knew what you were doing, you tugged him closer by the scarf, pulling him toward you. "This hideous scarf of yours," you muttered under your breath, using it as a flimsy excuse to hide the fact that you were really just closing the gap between you.
Theodore’s eyes flickered down to your lips, his breath fogging in the cold air between you. And then, without another word, you closed the distance.
The kiss was soft at first, tentative, like both of you were testing the waters. But the second his lips moved against yours, something inside you shifted. It was slow, unhurried, his hands gently cradling your face as if he had all the time in the world. The cold air disappeared entirely, replaced by the warmth of his touch, his closeness, and the feeling of him - consuming you.
When you finally pulled back, both of you breathless, Theodore’s eyes were still on you, that stupid smile of his making your knees weak.
"You didn’t even fix the scarf," he whispered, a teasing smile tugging at his lips.
You rolled your eyes, still trying to catch your breath, but you couldn’t fight the grin that broke through. "Shut up."
But Theodore only laughed, leaning in again to steal another kiss.
Your gloved hands came up, fisting the thick wool of his jacket as you-
“Finally!” Pansy’s dry tone rang out, followed by the sound of scattered applause.
You and Theodore broke apart, startled, only to find the rest of your group approaching, grinning like idiots.
“What the-?” you began, but Blaise interrupted, holding up a handful of galleons.
“We made a bet on how long it’d take for you two to finally snog," he said with a grin, pocketing the winnings. "I was getting worried."
Your face burned, and your grumpy demeanor returned in full force as you glared at them all. "I hate every single one of you."
But before you could storm off, Theodore just chuckled, pulling you into his side with a warmth that made it hard to stay annoyed. "Don’t worry," he murmured, pressing a quick kiss to the top of your head, "they’re just jealous."
Grumbling under your breath, you leaned into him as the group settled down.
Perhaps it wasn't all too bad.
#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott fic#theodore nott fluff#theodore nott#theo nott fluff#theo nott x reader#theodore nott x you
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❝ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀 𝐂𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐄! ❞
⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ yuuji megumi gojo nanami n choso ☆ how jjk men act when they have a crush on you!
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ fem!reader, black coded but anyone can read
⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ notes: ahhh the comeback post!! let's just say my old works were...less than coherent. but im here and ready to slay the day after 2-ish years!! take these crumbs while i try and find my footing again. stay hot lovies 🎀🎀
yuuji itadori 🌸
my babyyy (sob sob) yuuji would def try to impress you with his athleticism, bc girls like that stuff right? (gojo told him that...save him)
he frequently challenges you to friendly competitions when sparring to showing off his skills.
he def let's you get quite a few hits on him and he may even let you win from time to time (seeing your smile makes getting knocked on his ass worth it)
he might act a bit bashful, but he's straightforward. he knows he has a crush on you so why would he hide it?
expect nice gestures like him wanting to carry things for you, buying you food, watching all your fav movies, ect.
speaking of which, movie hangouts!!!
every friday usually you, megumi, nobara, and yuuji all get together and watch a movie
buuuttt if he's feeling especially brave he'll invite you to his dorm to watch the newest movie in your favorite series! (yes, he keeps track of when they come out)
he loves that it becomes y'alls thing and he loves it even more when you lay your head on his shoulder and doze off <;33
he also gives hella compliments cause something in my gut says his love language is words of affirmation.
anticipate many "isn't [name] just the coolest?" or "you look great today [name]!"
im telling you he could never run out of nice things to say to you, whether it be about your looks or personality
as soon as he realizes he likes you he takes down those pin up girl posters in his dorm
he also obviously thinks you're more beautiful than jennifer lawrence argue wit ur mama
he is also obviously a personality over looks guy so dont act surprised if you see him looking at you with a lovesick grin if he catches you doing something kind for someone
expect him to confess his feelings sooner rather than later
"yeah, why wouldn't i have a crush on [name]? shes beautiful and badass! but don't tell her, okay?"
megumi fushiguro 🌸
megumi, unlike yuuji is quite reserved, even with his friends
honestly gives no indication that he likes you at all 💀💀 he stares at you pretty intensely at first (to admire your beauty) but quickly catches on that you think its weird..
once you two get closer though, megumi would frequently express his crush through small gestures
he strikes me as a reader so i can see him recommending his favorite books to you or even lending you some of his.
you two exchange books often and he highlights quotes that remind him of you
i can also see book shop hangouts where you two sit and read together in some small bookshop he found in the city.
(he's just admiring you read)
he's not a huge compliment/affirmation guy but quality time is a big one for him
whether it be on missions, sparring, or out with the rest of the first year's, he enjoys any time he can have with you.
megumi is also very protective but like...subtly
he secretly watches out for you during missions, making sure you're safe without drawing attention to it
he'll insist you two split up but send one of his divine dogs to accompany you to wherever you go.
even when you're out and about in tokyo he always likes to stay close to you. he follows you around (not in a creepy way more like a lost puppy way)
follows you into stores you like even if he has absolutely no interest.
all in all he's just a shy guy who's whipped for you <3
"i enjoy spending time with you. a lot."
teen!satoru gojo 🌸
gojo...you bastard...(affectionate)
erm ngl i can def see him being a bully to you at first...
not like a bully bully but he def teases you a lot and it gets under your skin sometimes. (you hate him)
but in reality hes jus a spoiled litte rich boy in love.
once he realizes his feelings he still pokes fun at you sometimes, but tones it down hard and turns on his charm.
gojo's approach is confident and playful. he teases you, always with a charming grin, creating a dynamic that keeps things lighthearted and enjoyable.
he'll find excuses to spend time with you, whether it's offering to train together
unlike yuuji he doesn't care if he likes you this son of a gun will NOT let you win istg
it's like he's trying to rile you up, saying ridiculously cheesy one liners as he dodges all your attacks.
"thats the best you got? oh [name], we'll never get to be together if i keep beating you!"
one thing he does enjoy doing with you however, are snack runs.
gojo is a big back in disguise with too much money to spend so you already knows most of that goes towards food.
he has a huge sweet tooth so i can see you guys browsing multiple sweets shops in the city. if he sees you even look at something for too long he'll buy 10 of them.
every trip you guys both leave with full bellies and full hearts <3
gojo wants to be around you, and he makes sure it's fun for you both
his confession is likely to be straightforward. ccompanied by his trademark smile and his sparkling blue eyes peeking from his shades.
"you know, i've been thinking... i'm kind of into you. what do you say we make things a bit more interesting?"
teen!kento nanami 🌸
my emo boy ❤️🩹
nanami, with his composed demeanor, expresses his feelings (though you were unsure if he even had any) through thoughtful actions.
he remembers every. single. detail. of anything you say to him.
your favorite attist dropped an album today? he already bought you the cd/vinyl. you never got a chance to go to the store to get your favorite snack? he went 2 days ago.
he revels in the fact that he knows so much about yousnd the surprised look on your face gets him every time.
(haibara claims he's seen nanami smile at you multiple times but he vehemently denies it.)
despite his serious appearance, he'll occasionally crack dry jokes when it's just the two of you
look at that man and tell me he doesn't have a dry sense of humor 😭😭
you help him to relax and he feels he can truly be himself around you. when you two are alone its like hes showing a different side to his personality.
like megumi, i can see quality time being a big thing for him since attending jujutsu high leaves him quite busy
hes also not a huge talker so whenever you two do spend time together its probably somewhere intimate like your dorm or the library.
no words, just vibes. which he appreciates since he's around a bunch of yipper yappers all day.
nanami's confession is understated but sincere.
"i appreciate the time we spend together. it's made me realize there's something more i feel..."
choso kamo 🌸
my babyyyy no. 2 (i need him biblically)
let's get one thing straight tho. choso is a curse. in my opinion curses have no idea of love in a healthy, positive way so let's just say bb is confused.
he obviously knows what love is. he loves his brothers but he doesnt wanna kiss them...and cuddle them...
he goes to yuuji for advice (was it a bad idea? perhaps.)
"bro you totally have a crush on [name]!"
"a crush?"
after some further investigation hes pretty much got the gist of it.
one thing he becomes quite fond of doing is giving you small gifts from his missions.
these aren't typic gifts persay, like food, clothing or jewelry but more like knickknacks such as shells or rocks.
these tokens become a way for him to express what words might fail to convey.
i headcannon choso likes nature documentaries and after seeing that penguins mate for life by gifting a rock to their mate he's hooked.
idk but i also feel like he's very touchy.
he always has an eye on you in public and ik he does the thing where he guides u with his hand on the small of your back or he locks pinkies with you UGHHHH
with him being protective, he also subtly keeps an eye on you during missions.
he's not one to voice his concern directly but prefers to ensure your safety from the danger.
choso's confession might catch you off guard, but it's filled with honesty and sincerity.
"i've found myself caring about you more than I expected. it's strange..."
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ omg i actually really like this...(watch me hate it in a week) but reqs are open!! i have 1 or 2 more pieces planned to get me in the swing of things but take this before then. love y'all!!
𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐲 ♡
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𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚!
𝙘𝙤𝙥𝙮𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙡0𝙫3𝙝𝙖𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙖143 2024
#Words of the Love Hashira 💗#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#yuuji x reader#megumi x reader#gojo x reader#nanami x reader#choso x reader#x black fem reader#black writers on tumblr
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This is a sequel of the previous Dark Cacao one were they fought and everything
Things have calmed down now, the awkward moment has open space for some time, peace and some further talks
But Dark Cacao has come into term with a little something
He likes Reader Cookie: (use any pronouns) are/is strong, resourceful, agile and very skilled, he could see so much potential, and it's a surprise to find someone who not only knows their way in a fight, but ALSO can match HIM
He wants to ask her out, the issue is: how!?
He was not a single clue, time to ask his soldiers for advise I guess?
Maybe even contact hollyberry?
(To resume, this is Dark Cacao finally knowing he likes Reader Cookie, asks others for advise to ask them out and fails miserably, but Reader Cookie is so amazed at the brave [though failed] attempt that decides to give the idea of a date a try)
→ ❛Between the sword and your opponent, pt. 2❜
→ Pairing ; Dark Cacao Cookie x Reader → Quote ; ❛❛It surely didnt go according to plan but, to say Hollyberry, who had been listening intently from behind one of the pillars, wasnt satisfied, would be an understatement.❜❜ → Genre ; Drama , Romance → A/N ; This was very fun hahah, pt 1 is here!
Its been a good few days after the incident, the one where you shamelessly flirted with Dark Cacao in the middle of a fight. To say the king hadnt been thinking about it was… an understatement, he had thought about it, quite a lot. It had leaked into his daily like like the growing vines of grapes, and in return, they were twisting and shaping around his brain like a deadly respite. This, paired with the following talks you both had about the help the kingdom of Rose Champagne wanted to offer to the kingdom of Cacao, and the inevitable flirting that came with your personality, Dark Cacao seemed to inevitably start falling in love. It was a force of nature he didnt expect, that he didnt take in consideration, but as time passed, he realized that these feelings were ever present, and that there was no way he could keep them hidden.
Love, for Dark Cacao, was something he had long since given up on. He no longer seeked it, and he no longer expected it, especially after the falling out with his previous wife and the loss of his son, that he still deep down loved dearly, he no longer felt he had a place in the grounds of love, therefore, he simply stayed on his own place, allowing himself to be moved by the currents of life while focusing on the current moments with his kingdom, his subjects, and the war ever present with Dark Enchantress Cookie.
Thats perhaps what made this moment the more jarring to him, to be flirted with after he felt unlovable, after he felt undeserving of being loved—And then, the fact that his heart was starting to beat with fervor and energy yet again, for someone he once hurt unintentionally… It put his mind and heart at a standstill, confused as to how to proceed, confused as to what to do exactly.
“Damn, sounds like you’re deep in the trenches of love, old friend” Hollyberry would tell them once Dark Cacao sought them out for help, after all, out of all his comrades, the hollyberrian was the most capable when it cames to matters of love.
“Sigh, Im just, confused as what to do… I’ve given up on love a long time ago…” He said, looking down for a few moments, before turning back at her.
His hands were tainted with blood, and his mind haunted by the warriors long lost in the wars the cacao kingdom had been part of, not to mention the small guilt that followed him for having fallen in the trap that was Affogato’s tricks. He sighed yet again, because then there was you, someone hurt unintentionally by his hand, even if he was under the tricks of the snake, he still felt like he owed his people something.
“Oh c’mon, rid yourself of that long face, Dark Cacao!” Hollyberry would snap him of his thoughts, as she’d laugh heartily “Its clear what you must do, you must act upon your emotions!”
“Act… Upon my emotions?” He felt like he stayed in square one, unable to think of what exact way to move thorough this new challenge. “Right, but, how exactly?”
“You speak as if you hadnt been in a marriage once!” She spoke yet again, frowning for a moment before patting his back lively, and perhaps a bit too strongly “Fret not! What you must do, is confess and ask her out on a date! Dosent that sound logical?”
Right, a date… If only he wasnt rusty in these themes, perhaps the idea would’ve seemed more appetizing, but as it stood, he was confused and didnt know exactly what to do or say. Hollyberry, noticing this, would just sigh and shake her head, she thought Pure Vanilla was THE challenge in the ancient’s groups when it came to love, but Dark Cacao? Now he was winning second place.
You had been resting in your quarters, quietly taking a nap when it happened, a soldier knocking on your door causing you to wake up startled, and once the door opened, you would look confused at the soldier in question, looking at you with seriousness as he spoke the words sent by his majesty. He was requesting your presence in the throne room, words that left you dumbfounded as you brushed hair out of your face before nodding. You didnt put much thought about it, as you dressed to come see Dark Cacao in the throne room.
Walking towards the castle suddenly felt colder than usual, and your steps felt heavier, as if you were expecting something bad to happen, but thinking about it, the worse that could happen would be Dark Cacao shaming you and sending you back after your constant flirting… which didnt seem to be the case, if anything it did seem quite… out of character? The king didnt seem to be that fazed by your flirting, so… But on the other side, you could be expecting the end of the trip as he declared that all was well, and that the Cacao Kingdom would continue relations with the Rose Champagne Kingdom… Not really out of character and far more viable… still, if it were to be the case, why were you hesitating? Why were you feeling so heavy? Confused, you simply approached the door before stopping.
Were you, were you falling in love? No, there was no way, there was simply no way that you were falling in love with the King of the Cacao Kingdom, was it…?
“Your majesty, I’ve arrived…” You spoke as you finally took a step inside, bowing in front of the king, before he’d dismiss the other cookies in the room, letting you both alone in the room. “Is there, something you wished to discuss with me?”
“Yes, ahem… (y/n) cookie, there are some matters I must get to… involving you”
You lifted an eyebrow as he spoke, his nervousness apparent as he left the throne and walked towards you. Each step felt dangerous yet filled with a certain sense of unknown that scared you in some way. Yet you persisted, until he was right in front of you.
“Will… Ahem… Will you go on a date with me?”
“Huh?”
Now it was your turn to be taken aback. You stared at him dumbfounded as you felt all your worries and fears fade away into the dark. He looked at you curiously and you simply coughed before looking at him, smiling.
“... S-Sure, I dont mind!”
“You dont have to if you dont want to…”
“No-No, I do want to! Lets go on a date!”
It surely didnt go according to plan but, to say Hollyberry, who had been listening intently from behind one of the pillars, wasnt satisfied, would be an understatement.
#🌙;moonlit dreams#dark cacao cookie x reader#cookie run x reader#cookie run kingdom x reader#crk x reader
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i need more barbarian bakugo au or im gonna burst 😢😢
NOOOOOO bc !! ofc you know who he is, right ?? he's the next in line to lead your clan; you've seen him around your little village and at the smithy and felt the wind underneath the wings of his dragon as he flew overhead. you've stolen glances in the market, between the leatherworker's stall and the potter's kiln, and you've celebrated him along with your peers and you've watched him grow, from afar, into the kind of man that will come to be chieftain.
bakugou katsuki has always, always been—important. he was never among the litter of you that were escorted around by the clan childtender when you were just a young thing, nor was he ever involved in training for your first hunt or sat around the elders as the history of the clan was recounted to you; he grew up apart from the lot of you.
occasionally, his tender's would find him scuttling about in the fields with a tiny group of other boys, ones that were brave enough to wrastle with him in the dirt, or followed his commands closely enough that he allowed them to join him on unknown and unsupervised expeditions into the wilds.
you see him closely for the first time at his own nameday, at 16. it's a big celebration, a turning point in his young life, and he stands before the village with a face painted in the markings of a warrior, body unscarred and strong, and he hoots and hollers with all the etiquette of a feral child. which he might as well be, being raised by the kind of fierce chieftess that will no doubt go down in history.
your family offers a gift, as they all do, and it's you that climbs the steps of his family's hall and hand delivers it to him: a little clay dragon, a bit crude but made with care, that you've worked on for weeks. it's hard to tell how he feels about it, because he only stares at you in silence before huffing and puffing and baring his teeth at you, and then you're escorted back down to your family in the blink of an eye.
you orbit each other, distantly, though you never exchange more than a few passing words.
—so when the maidens that serve the bakugou family come to find you in the night, on the eve of katsuki's ascension to chieftain status, you're shocked to find he's taken lives and conquered settlements and tamed dragons and journeyed far and wide and grown to be the battle-hardened man that he is—but has never taken a lover.
and you're even more astounded to find that he's chosen you to be it.
#i had to cut myself off or i would have kept going LMAO#WAAAHHH HE MAKES ME CRAZY#maybe he even goes away for a few years#to fight in some war and he comes back less of a feral child and is suddenly a MAN#WHEW#oh man oh man oh man#he bares his teeth at you as a teen pls he's trying to show you how FIERCE HE IS 🥺🥺🥺#i have to go i have to stop i'll go insane you dont get it#✿ ask willow#✿ thoughts: bakugou
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:¨ ·.· ¨:⠀ `· . ୨୧ various edward nashton hcs & thoughts !!
contains: a mention or two about his killings in the movie, religious trauma, & drug usage. word count: 1.4k
writers note: hi friends! guhfhkj i am being brave and posting some writing on main.... ( ;´ - `;) here are a few headcanons and general thoughts that've been Marinating in my mind for a while. i felt like this was getting quite long, so maybe i'll have another post with some more soon.. because i have many thoughts..enjoooy! ^_^
♡ obviously he is obsessive. and loves repetitive actions and routines. his main special interest would be the renewal fund and the wayne family. (obviously) he has a big sense of moral justice. ⋆⭒ one of his main repetitive actions would be counting. he does this a lot with his fingers, the books on his shelf, or even the letters on a neon sign outside. just quickly under his breath. ⋆⭒ he also would sway. he usually does this in his apartment, when hes scrolling nigma or something. it really calms him. i think he would be too self-conscious to do it in public though. the King of masking. but occasionally he cant help himself when he's really focused at a café or something.
♡ but some of his other interests include: retro games, ancient civilizations, and general puzzle games. and god this man is a consistent minesweeper frequenter. heavy on frequent. loves 2048, sudoku, does the daily crossword on newspapers.
♡ half of the apps on his phone has to be games. 'games on his phone?' yes.
♡ i think he also has a undying love for pokemon. unsure what his favorite type would be, i think he would cycle through different types every single time the interest pops back up in his head again.
♡ AND GUYS GENUINELY HERE ME OUT. i think he helped code the club penguin rewritten website . im So. so serious on this one.
♡ OH OH. OHHH!! one of his longest lasting special interests? languages. how this starts? i imagine young edward back at the orphanage, already finished reading every single book he could find... every single english book, that is. maybe he'd sneak into the library. he's sure those books have riddles that can only be solved if you understand its language first. ⋆⭒ he finds interest in the progression of languages especially. how they change over time, and the origin of words and their sounds. ⋆⭒ though i don't think he would be a polyglot. but he'd know a lot of random words here and there, and some slang words no one would expect him to know from many languages!
♡ but a language he especially would like is ASL. he'd have a heightened interest of any form of communication that doesn't involve words. like, the font wingdings y'know? any kind of 'code.' ⋆⭒ he'd especially love learning ASL on his own during his younger years, since he struggled with speaking more often back then. he doesn't talk to anyone much now a days anyways, unless its small talk. (okk i see you selective mutism representation! >_< )
♡ he is sadistic. not a headcanon, just fact. this can be seen in his killings in the movie. though he primarily killed to give a point to the city of gotham, and to become a symbol much bigger than himself, he never gives these people quick and simple deaths. he enjoys these killings. cutting off the mayor’s thumb while he was still alive, sticking rat poison in officer savage, and sticking his head in a rat cage, waiting for them to eat him alive shown for everyone to watch. these were thought out, and he enjoyed watching. he enjoyed putting on a show, and their deaths were his entertainment.
♡ though outside of being the riddler, edward has a lot of self hatred. this fronts as anger, standoffish and anti-social behaviors. he doesn't mean to be mean, its just deep rooted. a combined hatred of everyone who'd hurt him prior.
♡ even though he hates himself, he also thinks of himself as better than anyone else. he feels as if he is worthy, and he has the intellect to show it. he consistently searches for small, daily positions that keep him in power.
♡ has a love/hate relationship with his own intellect. he wishes he wasn't cursed with his knowledge, sometimes he just wishes he could be blind and stupid to the darkness of the city. but he prides himself in being smart, especially in being good with numbers. its something he knows he can actually do correctly. he loves the certainty of numbers, how they never change or lie.
♡ i think would mostly hate how smart he was when he was younger. he hated how it distanced himself from genuinely everyone, and at one point he wasn't sure if he just enjoyed being reclusive or if he simply just got used to it. ⋆⭒ he would hate how the other kids or his classmates would only talk to him when they needed answers for their work and how they would expect him to know everything. (he sadly did.)
♡ he loves consistency. but hates complacency. he knows things can change, things could be better. but he finds comfort in his routines, even if it makes his world grey.
♡ due to religion being constantly drilled into his brain throughout his childhood, he experiences severe trauma. when he does something that is not pleasing to the beliefs he was taught, he self deprecates. lots of talking down on himself. he still can remember a few memory verses and prayers, and sometimes obsessively recites them to himself. ⋆⭒ he knows some of his fears are honestly a little irrational, that maybe one day he'll just be struck down. he's trying not to let them take over his logic, but he struggles. he is constantly upset that he still has these childhood fears that bind him.
♡ speaking of his time during the orphanage: his dirty unkempt upbringing and the long lasting effects of it could be seen in his living space. the chaotic and 'dirty' environment is almost comforting to him. sticky notes with ramblings of riddles and math problems. besides, his brain works too fast to care where things were placed in his home.
♡ despite his messy apartment, he hates feeling dirty. this is also thanks to the orphanage. he’s well kempt. everything is messy, not dirty. the orphanage was sadly, both. he looks like a sopping wet rat, it doesn't mean he smells like one though.
♡ he also has a fear of smelling bad, despite knowing he thoroughly washes. ⋆⭒ i think he would smell like soap or just his laundry detergent. he wants to try different scents, he kind of likes the idea of having a 'signature scent,' but honestly some smells give him a headache if they're too concentrated. and he can't have that while doing his everyday activities. ⋆⭒ its the kind of scent where you can only really smell it on the person when you hug them, y'know? which is kind of fine to him, he'd rather smell like nothing than something bad.
♡ he absolutely despises drops. any kind of heavy drug really he stays away from. he knows just how easily it can unravel a person, after constantly watching kids as young as 12 years old become addicted to it. his intellect would go to waste if he ever decided to start using.
♡ BUT! definitely smokes weed, or just in general he smokes. he probably tried it for the first time in his early twenties, hated it and dropped it. but he CANNOT continue handling his anxieties raw. so he picks it up again in his thirties. only occasionally... kind of.
♡ he loves LOVES animals. i like to think he had a little hyperfixation on animals and the general care for them when he was younger, so despite never having a pet, he could definitely at least recommend what to feed your average household pet.
♡ not only that, but he finds interest their internal structures, and the similarities to the human body. (i honestly don't know where these hcs came from, but bare with me here.) ⋆⭒ he loves dogs, but he's found himself liking cats a bit more recently. especially strays, he finds their resilience to continue living despite their circumstances to be admirable. ⋆⭒ he'd love to adopt. but he can hardly keep track of his own health, not to mention the state of his apartment. and don't even get him started on the extra expenses. ⋆⭒ though, i think he'd be pretty scared of interacting with any stray, maybe just animals in general he'd be pretty hesitant of being around. he doesn't like the uncertainty. and hates remembering his bad experiences with animals when he was younger. ⋆⭒ i think he'd bring himself to a cat café for one of his birthdays after weighing the pros and cons, after a day that was especially rough on him or something. he usually doesn't care for the date, but he honestly just likes using it as an excuse to go out somewhere whenever he feels like it. (he probably cried either from the animals' cuteness or the fact that he was there alone, maybe a bit of both. poor employees probably didn't know what to do.) ⋆⭒ i also think it would be funny if he was allergic, but obsessed. constantly sneezing but he can't help but want to cuddle up with them. but he doesn't have to be.
#riddler#the riddler#paul dano#riddler 2022#dano!riddler#dano riddler#edward nashton#danonation#the batman#batman 2022#headcanons#riddler headcanons#edward nashton headcanons
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Hi I saw your requests were open
Would it be okay to ask for a Nozel from black clover fic where Nozel who has been very busy for months and neglecting his wife s/o and ends up having a huge argument with s/o when she confronts him about it and they both give eachother the silent treatment but later finds her collapsed because she got super sick from the overstress and not taking care of herself cuz she thought nozel didn't love her anymore and would divorce her or she thought maybe he fell out of love with her and found someone better
I just love nozel angst to fluffs
ONLY LOOK AT ME.
pairing: nozel silva x wife!reader
warning: neglect, sick, fluff, angst
note: ill be honest with you, i completely forgot what the magical team are called like i completely forgot the lore of black clover... sorry for the late. alot of things have been going on tbh.
2 years of marriage with nozel silva.
in the beginning of your marriage, nozel treated you with care even though he was the captain of a magic knight group. you knew the responsibilities those captains hold.
you knew it all to well. nozel became too busy to the point that you don't even see a strand of his hair at home. whenever nozel became too busy, you didn't know if you want to confront him about it or just let it go — but he neglect you too much.
whenever you tried to ask him to eat dinner with you, it was always the same response — "i have mission" or "i still have a lot more paperwork" with that cold tone of his. you know nozel is trying his best but won't he look at you once when saying that? at least try to make sure you knew you were still loved by him.
it has been more than 3 weeks, you couldn't handle it anymore so this time you tried to be brave and confront him about it.
"nozel, do you have time right now?" you ask him with that soft tone of yours. nozel glanced at you "i do, what is it?" for the first time in weeks he finally face you and look at you in the eyes.
you breath in and out "nozel, don't you think you're neglecting me too much? i know that you have your duties as a captain but can't you atleast.. please, if you actually have the time to atleast tend to your husband duties? is this asking too much for you?" you were shaking because this is the first time you confront nozel about anything.
you hoped that his answer wouldn't hurt like a stab on the heart.
"i have been neglecting you? [name], i have bigger duties to do. i cannot just linger around. clover kingdom is the magic knight's responsibility and im a captain." he said with his famous cold tone of his. he sighed loudly and you can't help but grip your first.
"i know. i know that you have your duties but please atleast try to make it like you still loved me!" you exclaimed while you were on the verge of tears. you look down on the floor and nozel sigh yet another time.
"[name], stop being overdramatic. i will try to make time for you." he tried to reach out for you but you slap his hand away. "you better promise that then. don't make any empty promise..." you glance at him, his face was shocked with how you push him away.
"ah, nozel! im sorry. i didn't me-"
"maybe it was a mistake for me to have this talk with you."
after that argument you had a few days ago, you gave silent treatment to each other. you didn't greet him home neither did he come looking for you. ever since that day you found comfort in isolating yourself in the bedroom that's always occupied by two people but now the other side of the bed felt cold.
it ruins your mental health though, without the company of your lover, you felt like your world is falling apart. the maids tried to make you eat the foods but you didn't. you kept rejecting them.
just like how nozel was, you started to be diligent in your duties on taking care of the house but you overworked yourself to the point whenever you stand up from your seat, you get a major headache.
you started to not going out of the house to have fresh airs and just locked yourself in. the staffs were worried about you. they whispered to eachother what will happen to you and nozel's marriage. will it break?
you sit on the edge of your bed while gripping your head "it hurts..." you mumbled to yourself. this time, you couldn't handle the stress and the headaches. you felt dizzy and nausea. soon enough, you fainted in your room.
hours later, nozel finally came back from his mission and wanted too relax in his room for abit when he suddenly saw the state you're in after he entered the room. he ran over to you and carried you to the bed, he called the maids to help him with you.
"[name], [name], what happened to you? please wake up!" he panicked seeing you in that state. your skin was pale and your breathing was also low. it put nozel into being an overthinker.
he questioned the staffs on the reason why you fainted. the staffs that was around him had a panicked look. they knew the reason why so one of them spoke up "[name]-sama has been overworking herself. s-she also hadn't been eating well. we tried to let her rest and also tried to make her eat but she refused too... also! we don't want to put any blame but we think that it's because of you, nozel-sama. maybe it's because of the big argument you two had few days ago..." the staff stammered, the staff looked around the room instead of meeting nozel's eyes while saying that. the other staffs agreed with what they said.
nozel had a shocked face after he heard the reason, he looked back towards your sleeping figure. "it's... because of me?" nozel thought, he bit the inside of his cheeks. he remembered the argument all too well. so because of that, you overworked yourself..?
nozel cleared his throat and ordered the staffs to get out of the room, the staffs hurried out of the room not wanting to witness nozel's wrath. well they assumed that nozel is gonna be mad at them.
the room is finally quiet with only you two's own breathing. nozel sit beside you on the bed and looked at your face. he felt guilty and regretted what he said. he knew the damage can't be undone.
but this time, he will try and only look at her. even if his work keep piling up, his wife's happiness is his first priority. he will try to be the better version. he will try to have quality time with her.
he will try balancing work life and his private life.
"if you thought that i fell out of love. i didn't, instead i fell in love with you all over again. you can't hear me right now but forgive me. forgive my behavior. im yours forever."
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