#im TERRIFIED of the dentist
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if i see my face in the mirror or in a photo/video i will think about it all day. And not in a narcissistic way, but in a "i litterally hate myself way"
#like i did NOT get good picks from the gene pool#i got my parents worse traits#and a lot of my self loathing is from my teeth and underbite#and ik that sugery could fix that but#im TERRIFIED of the dentist#like the last time i was there i SOBBED like a kid#and even just thinking about the dentist or surgery terifies me#anyway#tw vent#ig
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"yeah I know you've been telling me you're in pain like every day bc of your cavity but here's a video of someone else who got their wisdom teeth removed and is panicking from the the anesthesia and ‘acting stupid’. I have greatly implied up to this point that I don't want you to get anesthesia or to not remove the teeth at all”
#they’re taking out four fucking teeth and im not even allowed to take them afterward.#do you honestly expect that they would give me the option of not being under anesthesia.#they won’t let someone I trust be in the room as it’s happening i don’t Want anesthesia.#idgaf if I say something stupid on anesthesia. im terrified of someone doing something to me that I won’t know about or remember#idk im not fucking blaming you that I Haven’t been to a dentist my whole life. were kinda Not Well Off#but you expect me to just Deal With It as my fucking tooth rots?#it could fucking kill me. the infection could spread to my brain and it could actually fucking kill me#and if they just take out all four Now I won’t have to worry abt it again Ever#it’s funny that when our cat was having teeth issues you expected me to deal wifh it pay#payment and all but when it comes to Me having teeth issues suddenly you want to have a say. fuck off#tooth trauma#words from the monarch
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Scheduled my first dentist appointment in years HOUGH
#im not scared of the dentist but i am terrified of the shame that comes alongside having numerous cavities#like my first dentist was passive aggressive as fuck and that shame really stuck with me#like yeah i didnt take care of my teeth becuase i was an unmedicated teenager with adhd failing school after their mom died#and you called me lazy when i didnt expect to live that long to deal with the consequences#wow this just became a vent#anyway at least im starting to fix it
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🏥🦷
#damn my teeth on my left side reallyyyyy fkn hurt#last night it started hurting so bad i couldnt fall asleep#i took some regular over the counter pain pills nd they brought down the pain a bit#so it at least didnt hurt as bad as it did first#but now after sleeping a few hours it still hurts ://#idk what to do... bc i've googled but it is like impossible for me to know what this is. could be anything rlly#nd w physical health stuff im not as terrified bc i can just go to the ER. when i was there it only cost $15 lol#but dental care is so fkn expensive i dont even have that in my account#anyway. i could get an 'urgent appointment' which i get financial aid for... probably. thats the thing. it's not 100% certain#idk what i should do bc like i could wait it out nd see if it'll pass nd then wait on my appt the 6th may#or maybe i should call my dentists nd ask them what they think nd if they can give me an urgent appt..#i hate calling tho. i know that sounds ridiculous esp when im dealing w pain but my avpd makes it so so hard for me. i'd almost rather not#if i was smart nd normal thats what i would do. just call them nd see what they decide for me. maybe i'll wait nd see nd call tmrw....#nd idk abt the pain. like it rlly hurts but it isnt extreme i think.. but when i press one tooth it hurts a lot nd makes me worried it's#dying 💀 nd like u can actually die from teeth pain nd complications... nd infections nd stuff. it's scary af 😭#idk if my tooth is dying nd i need to contact a dentist rn or if its smth that can wait for a bit#i mean if i had a job nd a salary i'd book an appt for tmrw nd get it checked but i have to discuss w myself bc i cant afford lol#ugh this is the reason im terrified of dental problems. the pain is awful nd theres nothing u can do if you're poor#my head keeps spinning idk what i should do abt this 😭 i csnt make up my mind. just want it to go away on its own but i know it wont#nd it hurts so that i can barely sleep or eat or concentrate. so i rlly dont know.....#oh if only things were easy
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Oddly enough I feel more comfy anxietyposting here instead of twitter so uh. I preface this with Yes I’m A Grown Adult but I am irrationally anxious about This :’)
#i'm 26 coming on 27 and not had my wisdom teeth pulled and every year that passes by the thought of it freaks me out#main reason is because they never gave me issues or pain and anytime i saw a dentist they said it's likely i don't need them pulled#but as i get older it's like. is this the year they're going to start giving me problems?? should i have just bit the bullet and got them#out when i was younger despite them not giving me issues?? which in itself is terrifying because#everyone i know who's got the procedure talks about how awful it is and how much pain you're in for weeks afterwards and it's like hhhhhh#i'd rather not go through that much pain if i don't have to yknow? but also *do* i know if i don't have to? what if by the time i find out i#need to get them out it's too late? i've heard the procedure is more risky if you do it at an older age (though dont know how true this is)#like i think about this an irrational amount despite my wisdom teeth not affecting my life at all :')#but yeah...sorry for bein anxious outta the blue here; i don't post here much but it's still in a lot of ways where im most comfy Rambling
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HEY ME AGAIN HOW ARE YA
I'm no longer sick (thank God) SO. To celebrate, for lack of a better term, I have a request for you:
Wesker with a partner who sleepwalks, or if that's not zesty enough, Wesker catching his partner-to-be masturbating to him.
hello!! I'm glad you're not sick anymore
I unfortunately still am and now I'm having a toothache from it too, meaning I have to go to the dentist :')
anyway:
he is endeared by them sleepwalking
thinks it's funny but also cute
makes sure they're safe of course
quietly walks after them while snickering
lets them walk for a while before gently waking them up or redirecting them to the bed
"dearheart. you're sleepwalking again..."
will absolutely tease them with it
annnd I wrote something a bit similar not too long ago!! you should be able to find it in my blog <3
#gothghostiie#im terrified of dentists#like crying and shaking#and of needles#ghostiie rambles#albert wesker#dead by daylight#resident evil#wesker#dbd#albert wesker x reader#wesker x reader#ask ghostiie#fluff
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i have surgery today :(( i'm scared :(( if i die, pls play louis tomlinson at my funeral
#pspspsps im being dramatic#its dental surgery#but also i am TERRIFIED of the dentist and im literally crying and shaking and throwing rn#april rambles#just dumb hoe stuff
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Some more modern AU- this time I'm finally taking another stab at a fic I swore I would finish- it's called "Affections" and I'm FINALLY going to finish it. Or at least try.
Enjoy this little sneak peak though!!!!
"What's in that room?" Omega asked, pointing to the only closed door in Mistress Se's extended basement.
She already knew, but a small part of her prayed that this time, her question would be answered.
Tech paused, holding a box as he studied the peeling paint on the door. Behind him, Echo and Hunter had frozen up, both of them watching their youngest brother intently.
"It is the reconditioning room." Tech answered after a moment. Omega tilted her head. "What do you mean?" She asked.
"What do you think it means?" Crosshair's sharp voice came from the top of the stairs. Hunter went to hush him, and Omega turned sheepishly to Tech.
"I've only been in there a few times," She told him. "I wasn't told what it was meant for."
Tech hesitated, eyes still pinned to the nail marks etched into the floorboards just shy of the door.
"That is a good thing." He said simply. Omega watched his jaw lock, and knew she wouldn't get anything else out of him. She turned away, handing the box she held off to Echo before going back upstairs with the others.
She helped them move the rest into Hunter's van, and Omega paused, looking back to Mistress Se's house. Tech hadn't come back out yet.
She slipped back in, passing Wrecker as she trudged back down the stairs to the basement. She stopped at the bottom, and paused.
The box Tech had been holding sat abandoned on the floor, and the 'reconditioning room' door had been opened.
She heard Echo's heavy footsteps stop at the top of the stairs, and she walked into the room cautiously. "Tech?" She called.
The chair hadn't moved from its spot, rooted into the floor. It looked something akin to a dentist chair, with well worn leather straps hanging loosely on the armrests. Neck and leg restraints had been drilled in, rusted nails sitting on the trays beside the chair.
It was stained with blood. It looked years old, faded into the chair with age. Omega looked up from the chair to see Tech standing beside it.
Tech stared at it, eyes glassy as he stood awkwardly beside the chair. He rubbed his arms slowly, methodically, from his wrists to his upper arm, stopping just short of his shoulders. It looked almost like he was self soothing.
Omega glanced to his arms. He was wearing a t-shirt, a rare sight. Omega had only seen it once or twice in her time knowing her brothers. She could see it now, the small, sharp scars that were drawn across his arms.
She frowned, catching the slight tremble in his hands as he traced a delicate hand across the chair.
She wondered how many times he had to sit on that chair, and what happened when he did.
"Tech." Omega jumped and turned. Crosshair stood at the door, barely sparing her a glance as he too watched his younger brother. Tech hopped, spinning on his foot.
He was pale, gripping his arms tighter. Crosshair stepped over, holding his arm to move him away from the chair. "Hunter's waiting in the car." Crosshair told Omega. "Grab the box and go."
Omega scurried off, taking one last glance to Tech before she scooped up the box and ran back up the stairs.
She could finally know who's blood stained that chair, after so many years of watching and wondering.
It was theirs. It was his. She had to know more.
#LORE DROP#im terrified of dentists chairs#i actually dont mind the actual dentist activity itself#but the CHAIR#its so scary#so i made them all scared of it too#sw the bad batch#tbb tech#tbb crosshair#tbb wrecker#tbb hunter#tbb echo#tbb omega#sw modern au#i love the medical trauma these fuckers go through#tw medical
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dentist time :,)
im gonna cry
#im literally terrified of dentists and it doesn’t help that im undergoing a bug procedure#that ive never had done on me before#im so scared bro help😭😭😭#nonsensical ranting
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Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuk I hate everything
#“hey hi um yeah soooo because we made a little oopsie a while ago your teeth are unsalvageable and you need four root canals. sorry!” WHAT#i fucking#am terrified of the dentist enough as it id#and now you're telling me#that by the time im in my mid twenties#ill already have four dead teeth in my mouth that will fall out#okay okay that's cool#it's cool#it's fine#it's all good#vent#guys why am i crying over teeth it's all good it's all fine#fucking christ of all the things to have ANOTHER breakdown over#it's fucking teeth#don't even know what to do right now fuck me#im just sick of crying man give me a break
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Thank you to all the replies for the wisdom teeth stuff, this will be my 2nd last boss
#final boss is getting a permanent job after i graduate#im 50/50 on getting an injection or going thru anaesthesia. im leaning to anaesthesia bc i am TERRIFIED ‼‼#maybe i can turn that fear to anger bc my fucking dentist is SCAMMING ME ‼‼#etc
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me on my way to have a super intense dental procedure: don't think about htp don't think about htp don't think about htp
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#this is so stupid and childish but im fucking terrified of the dentist its gonna hurt so much im freaking out so badly#i need to do this i know i need to but im scared im always scared of everything but this is different im terrified im so small and stupid#i really do like that my mental health is improving vut i kinda miss the comfort of suicidal ideation i was so easy#im scared im scared im scared im scared its gonna hurt so much its so gross im so stupid and childish im scared why is everything scary#please my life needs to start getting easier after this im really scared all of life is just this kind of anxiety and suffering im scared
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hey remember one and a half years ago when my dad got arrested for domestic abuse and me and my mom had to flee the house bc he was stalking us afterwards, but i had really bad stockholm so i was like 'yeah he's evil but he's my dad i guess'
ANYWAY thank FUCK i grew out of that huh
#the idea that december 2021 i was gonna physically meet with him in person after everything..... fucking terrifying#the only reason i didnt is by coincidence. i had a dentist appointment that morning that left me fucked up and i had to cancel with my dad#im not joking im hard convinced he wouldve tried to murder me....#at the absolute minimum he wouldve worked himself up into a frenzy of anger and tried to take it out on me by beating my ass#ugh god anyway fat rip to pedophile/abuser dads; yall should fr go and die lmao its what they deserve#dad tw#abuse tw#ask to tag
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i need to book an appointment with my dentist and i’m terrified pls don’t laugh at me 😔
#— ai rambles#i’ve always hated dentists bc i’ve had the most terrible experiences ever since i was a kid#yk how even the best make mistakes#somehow i was always the victim of those 😭#it was the worst two years ago bc i literally had to get surgery bc the dentist was a bit careless 😭#and now there’s tiny bit of an issue in the same place and i’m terrified 😭😭#WHY ME 😭 it’s always me 😭#+ i have to get my wisdom tooth removed bc i’ve been postponing that for so long 😭#😭😭 now it’s going to be all at once IM SO SCARED 😭😭#SOB this is hell 😭
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oh yeah i forgot to tell yall i dyed my hair pink
#winter’s diary#i mean only the top layer is pink the rest is blonde#and even tho it hasnt even been a month my roots are so fucking awful dfghfds#like im a natural blonde technically but where i dont go outside anymore my roots are so dark#however i got a raise and im getting a full time paycheck now so ill be able to get my hair done soon#and i plan on keeping the pink but making the front two pieces blonde with light blue at the end#like cotton candy hair#bc i love cotton candy#the colors#cotton candy itself i do enjoy but i dont like sweets that much#i prefer less sweet sweets#like dark chocolate#i wonder if its because i am terrified of having cavities because of the time i had 8 at once as a kid#i mean im terrified of the dentist in general#this sounds bad but i havent been since i got my braces off#whiich was when i was 15#im just so terrified of the dentist honestly#i dont like people messing with my teeth#i think its from where i got 4 adult teeth removed in order to get braces because that was the most awful experience of my life#i have less teeth than the average person because my mouth is too small to hold them all#hence the removing of adult teeth for braces#i had 7 teeth in total removed (3 were baby teeth obv) in order to get braces in 7th grade#and then it was pointless because by the time i got my retainer my teeth had already shifted#so i will have crooked teeth until i can afford to fix them
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