#ik thats not all of them but yk
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The only people I hate more than the American's who are able to go to wwwy fest, are the non-American's able to go to wwwy fest.
#/j if you couldn't tell#RAGHH#My Easter European ass could NEVER#my chemical romance#fall out boy#the used#jimmy eat world#pierce the veil#ik thats not all of them but yk#when we were young#wwwy 2024#wwwy fest#wwwy24
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im so tired. have dickroy sketches cus i havent posted in 2 months. i wont post again ❤️ when i do itll have duke prommy
#digital art#sketch#dc#procreate#dick grayson#roy harper#they are the worst couple ever. i hope they die happy together.#dg pussy is an illness ☹️☹️☹️ that roy is happy to have 😏😏 its terminal ‼️‼️‼️#'jason isnt the angry robin' ok well. have you considered hes a 12 year old boy. with evil older brother. yeah.#hes still not yk but also all of them aee because thats (imo) the point of robin. childrens rightous anger at a world that harms them yk#i have a timeline. theyre very on and off couple core. they argue on vacations. theyre never not touching eachother#how many jokes can i fit in here#one time dg was sobbing at the kitchen table and roy was like 'omg r u ok :(' and dg went 'LOOK AT HIM :((((' and sticks his arm out#and shows the ugliest fucking action figure roy has ever seen of himself and roys like 'hes really ugly' and dgs like 'IK I LOVE HIM SMMM'#sometimes when that happens roy asks if dicks on his period#when dg is mad at roy he'll whine to people about him w roy right beside him. roy is normal and just whines to any animal or child he finds#ok im done ❤️
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does any other demiromantic (or arosepc doesnt rlly matter) feel like. extremely awful when they experience romantic attraction or is that just me.
#spacie spoinks#bruh#like. while im experiencing it i wish so badly that i wasnt 😭#i feel disgusted. is this what romantic repulsion is???#cuz like ill be experiencing all the lovey dovey stuff yk#''ooohb i wanna kiss dem oooh what if we help hands'' romantic crap but its like. anxiety inducing#like it feels awful??? is this normally how it feels?? i dont like it.#it like. doesnt feel right or natural and im assuming its b/c i just like?? barely feel it ever?? and thats why???#strange as hell.#i recently felt romantic attraction 2 someone (it has been 2 or 3 years since i last felt it) and it came on really strong for like#a week and that was like the worst week of my life#i couldnt think abt anything else but them like it wasnt even like. fantasies or anything just like.#the concept of them. my brain would just be like ''hey remember this guy''#I LIKE COULDNT SLEEP#HOW DO YOU PPL ENJOY THIS????#me; clutching my head for ~a week: AUUUGH!! THE PERSON!!! THE PERSON!!!!!#im so serious this is how it feels w/springtrap. hes like a blight on my psyche#the feelings have faded mostly i think. i think im normal abt them again (thank god)#its so strange. i think a romantic relationship would be fun but then i start feeling the feelings and its. awful.#so horrid#also like. im considering that maybe the relationship i would like some day isnt romantic but a qpr#idk. ive never been in any kind of serious relationship (never wanted 2 and have never been approached for it)#sometjing 2 think abt i guess?#anybeans. i tire.#hope i never experience that again#ik that like in 2-3 years ill be like: ''man. idk what past spacie was talking abt. would be nice 2 feel romantic attraction again''#NO SPACIE IT WONT!!! REMEMBER!!!!!! REMEMBER WHAT YOU WENT THRU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ah, doctor, does this look okay?
#some supplementary drawings while i work oj the scooot thing#this is my first time drawing heavy and i drew it at like#10#so its not the best!!! ik i didnt make him larrgg enouf but yk thats ok!! ill improve on it next time#also i hc that heavy rllly does like to wear feminine things sometimes but he felt like he had to be “big and masculine”#to protect his family and so never wore them#but now heavy can wear what he wants and medic made a suggestion#he thought that all the mercs were gonna be weirded out but to nobodys suprise#they all loved it#(esp medic)#art#my art#alps art#tf2#tf2 heavy#heavymedic#!!
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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is
#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And#make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not#saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was#going to say#like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so#bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the#winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000#other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but#i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its#been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody#responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple#muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it#but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like#im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good#solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start#all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the#punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4#im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but#even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think#avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is#like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they#hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be#the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO#difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15#minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case#it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel#stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and#tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i#tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction#like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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jonathan/eddie makes me so sick (POSITIVE!) because in the magical fantastical self indulgent world i have created in my brain in which they were in each others periphery since childhood and only really got close in the background while things were getting tense in jonathan's life is something that can be SO personal. eddie has to move in with wayne after middle school? jonathan finds his way to his new trailer whenever he can, it's muscle memory by the time he comes back to hawkins. lonnie fucks off from the byers? jonathan and eddie spend the night near castle byers writing a list of all the bands they're gonna see when they gain more independence. eddie loiters around the photography club (never participates or engages, just lurks) when jonathan moves to california. that kinda stuff
#kings.txt#also hi i missed posting my nonsense on here#keep subjecting my darling friends to my brain rot but my WORDS must be HEARD#i may even begin posting my jeddie ramblings disguised as fic but 🚬 what's the rush#rarepairs be like what if we consumed ur every waking thought#jonathan byers#eddie munson#jeddie#ik there's like two other jeddies (jeff/eddie i am a BIG big fan of) and yall call them#eddithan#but i was never really down with that name for some reason ...? didnt fit the sound vibrations bumping up and down my teeth very well#joneddie munbyers jonson whatever da fuq else people call em is all fine by me#idk any noun ship names for them though. not too fond of nounnames outside of h/ellc/heer bc thats just what they Are yk#wrong blog for me to be going crazy about THEM as well but uh 🚬 yknow
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i need buddie to have a normal wedding. no one else has had a normal wedding (ig excluding henren vow renewal) and buddie needs to have a normal one. they all deserve it
#bathena had a courthouse wedding#ik bobby would love helping buck plan it#he would try to do the catering and cake and buck would have to try and convince him that officiating is more than enough#athena wants nothing to do with wedding planning but she loves bobby and buck and eddie so shed tag along for all the catering tastings#even though she thinks bobby makes better food#maddie and chim would love it so much because buck would be a groomzilla and involve them with everything#and maddie low key loved planning her wedding (even if it didnt all work out) and so her and buck would be like ordering so many flower#samples and fabric samples and theyd be so involved but eddie and chim would be like. buckleys am i right. but theyd be so in love#and yk hen and karen would go crazy fr#because a gay wedding??? ik hen would plan the most insane bachelors party for buck and eddie (because they would have a joint bachelor#party no one could tell me otherwise)#like please#tim please listen to me#i need buddie to have a normal wedding#like no drama no emergency or anything#the biggest drama is buck and eddie fighting over who gets chris as their best man (eddie wins and thats fine because that means maddie can#be bucks best woman)#pleassseeeeeeeee#please please#tim please im not asking for much
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#i wish ppl wouldn’t buy me things and expect me to pay them back without like. telling me or asking me first. like ik she said she isnt lik#worried about when i can pay it back but /i/ am#i hate owing ppl money it stresses me out more than anything else#its why im constantly stressed about paying off my car#even tho I KNOW that i will be able to finish paying it off in time before the cut off#but. its still really stressful and i hate it a lot#cause then its all i can think about till its done#like if someone gets me a gift thats awesome n cool#but if you get me something because they might run out before i can get it and you expect me to pay you back#please like#ask first? before doing it? so i can plan on that kinda thing#or say no if i feel like i need to#even if its not stressful for YOU its stressful for ME#im happy to have what they got me and its not that expensive to repay#but i really didn’t want that pang of stress right now when im already dealing w stuff#little stressors are still stressors and they add up yk#i just. needed to vent where they wouldn’t see cause i dont like venting abut ppl where they can see it i think its rude#so obviously obligatory this is about no one on this platform even a little bit#delete later
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i need to draw o/ff characters again and post hcs abt them to my blog. oogoog
#i dont particularly like the popular hc that en/och eats his els/en. it feels weird to me for multiple reasons#KEEP IN MIND THIS IS ALL PERSONAL THINKINGS OK ok here i go#ik i said id post em on the blog but im abt to go to sleep so imma say it here#but like. mahybe im just crazy or looking too deep into things. but i dont see any reason for en/och = eats his els/en besides the fact#that hes fat. and like thats it from what i can rememebr.#like id ont. remember him saying any dialogue that would insinuate it??#OK hold on clarifying = eats them alive/eats their bodies and NOT just eating burnt ashes/sugar#OR it could also be something that like was thought of bc of the horror element of the game +#the zone is a zone that is like Heeyyyy everyone eats everyone here :) so obvs it could just be like a horror hc to go with the theme#or environment of the zone#so like obvs im not gonna like. be upset over ppl liking the hc like to most people it seems just canon to them#but i do not like it....not one bit. he WOULD gaslight and manipulate his workers. absoltuely. but he would NOT eat them alive.#i feel like en/och is too much of like...he has high standards for his foods (chef it up. he can make the fanciest of meals and the nicest#of cakes). so i feel like he'd be like. insulted like ummmmmm no lol that is NOT very presentable. and gross. put their ashes in it and#dress it up and maybe ill eats it then :] yk????#IDK. maybe im just thinking waayyyy too much into this. but i kinda dont care i love this game and i love en/och.#i dont need to fix him hes perfect as he is (manipulative and a cannibal but not like that way. ok?)#cant you let her win for once ?????#ok ok im done for now but for this game? my dear friends. i am ALWAYS open to talking about my thoughts#ow.file
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Oh god I need to know it anyone else noticed Nanba and Saeko have a different relationship than she has with anyone else in the group? Plus Ichiban’s most natural flirting is aimed at Zhao even without player input 😭😭😭
nanba and saeko def have a really cute relationship, i adore their interactions immensely (❁´◡`❁)
and lbr ichi's matching zhao's energy alright. insert zhao 'kasuga-kun' compilation here
#snap chats#honestly i love how saeko interacts with everyone- like she never feels like The Girl of the group she just feels like a part of the group#yk what i mean ? like i feel like in a lot of other casts where theres one/few girls they stick out like sore thumbs#because of how the other cast members and the media treats her but with saeko its like#Yeah No She's Here. She's A Girl But That Doesn't Mean Much#like obvi there's some instances like her offering to be a hostess but Tactical Necessity right#and honestly even the party chats she has with everyone are so nice too i love them so much#i love the one where she and adachi are roleplayin having kansai accents that shits so cute and funny#sorry for the impromptu saeko rant i just never express how much i loved her character and contribution to y7#yk whats funny tho as i was walking to my computer i thought about making a nanba post and lo and behold#it wasnt a major one it was just me going 'i cant believe that during my VA ramble i forgot one of my favorite fun facts#and that's greg chun also voices ike from fire emblem' because ike's been My Baby since like. 2008#he's still jason adkins to me </3 but i mean greg chun also voiced luke from shadows of valentia#ok ill stop with the VA talk i promise thats the only one i wanted to update on#thats a lie but i'm forcing myself to stay semi on topic#ichi and zhao are funny too theyre such fuckin goobers#like ichi definitely dicks with zhao the most- or at least zhao matches his energy the most equally imo#Y7's cast and relationships are just top tier thats all i can really say#i love how despite eri being an optional character she still has party chats with everyone#i love eri.... BUT thats a post for another day#im either A.) going to continue trying to figure out how modding works B.) play smash ultimate
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like i wouldnt mind like. Not having new linear games post 5 its judt that sims 4 wasnt even supposed to Be The Sims 4 it was a last minute pivot and the base code is so outdated and was broken On launch so like. i just wish we could have the final actual sims game be like. one that was always intented to be a major sims release AND be intended to be so long term . yk
#i dont even want like. Ooh major graphical updates whatever if sims 5 was announced and they looked photorealizstic id hurl i wouldnt play#it#my ideal would ig be sims 4 with a touch more realism style wise. if this makes sense#like its a bittt too cartoony for me but i like the like. Clay hair or whatever SJFNFJ. and i think having it be simple in basegame means#you can customize it easier + itd run better on more pcs#so im fine eith that. i would nottt want it more cartoony#i also like. I understand the sims is like. an all ages game i do sometimes wish that the animations in 4 were a bit toned down#like i dont mind silly goofy wacky stuff i think its fun and like. The sims has always been a bit sillay yk. but the overexaggerated#animations r sometimes like -_-.... to me. but thats personal preference#IDK. the tags that show up when i type idk r so funny. do i ever know anything. sources say no#BUT ya i just rly wish like. if this is what they wanna do i wish theyd give us One more full game give it lots of time and love and rly rly#focus on having it excel at like. being this partnof the sims#since they wanna have like. Other sims games that have online features and multiplayer and everything. they could use that to make sure that#ts5 was Rly solid as a foundation and as like. ykwim..... they could plan updates for the future And dlc or whatever and i just think itd be#a better move than trying to make sims 4 happen#bc i judt dont think With all the updates in the world. sims 4 wont ever be like. what it couldve been. yk. i just dont think you can make#it work without Fullllyyyy just starting over.#and at this point with like..so many modders and stuff and everything and how much dlc there is thatd be impossible Esp if they keep#releasing new stuff which. They will ^_^#idk. im excited for some other lifesim games im keeping my eye out#but i rly do love the sims and i just wish that it could be as good as it could be. It has such a huge budget and team and like. if ea would#stop just trying to make as much money as possible off it i feel like they could make Such an amazing game. not to put down indie gamedevs#at all the games jve been looking at look Incredible like.. yk. but the fact those games are so good eith FAR smaller teams and budgets is#like. imagine what we could have if the sims had that amt of care and time put into it.#but whatever whatever whatever. sorry im just rambling#again ik what i would want from my platonic ideal of a sims game isnt what everyone would eant#but idk. i feel like another good step might be like. making the other sims games more available and updating them so they run better on#modern pcs. but i dont think thatll ever happen DNDNFJFNFN.
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Can we like ban indian men from social media
#ok before yall come at my throats like ik there are good men and this is not about them#but like whenever i see indian men on social media all i see are those alpha males that claim a womans natural chore is to cook and clean#and a mans is to make money and ugh its so frustrating because thats FAR from true#there was this reel where the speaker was speaking about how chores should be equally distributed between the wife and husband#and like... every single indian man was like “sorry to disagree mam but my mother worked took care of the 4 kids cooked cleaned”#LIKE YES thats a great feat and i commend that but#its not a GOOD thing to overwork your mother so much yk?#why does it hurt for the man to share some burden? what is SO wrong about that#keep in mind i am talking about families where both the people work#dawn.txt#tbd#if ur a conservative and ur gonna disagree pls dont comment lol im not gonna respond
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eep!
#cryptic ramblings#in the tags#feelinggggg a little bit neglected by me irl friend group 😖#just like. every time i say smthn/yap a lil i dont tend to get much acknowledgement??#vs the other two will always get some kinda acknowledgement etc both from me and the other (theres 3 of us)#idk im hoping its my pre-period bs talking n overanalyzing things but like... idk#bc its like. we're all stressed bc of our jobs n like other stuff#n we all share w eachother! abt those stressors! n we sympathize n offer advice n help where necessary!#like these r my Best Friends. theyd both be my Co-Smthn Of Honor when i get married!!! so i dont wanna assume smthn negative abt em yk??#but i just... yknow... feel a lil... blergh#like neglected is kinda too strong but just like.. im kinda annoying??? bothersome maybe??? idk#like if uve seen some of my other tags ive been stressed tf out over cleaning my room bc i had a certain deadline (which was today)#n last night was the worst of my stress but it was the most id done n i shared this w them but another one of em shared some their own stuff#n we all responded to them while i did not get anything n it made me feel a bit ignored 🥴#n ik i should prob bring this up to them but like i also dont wanna guilt them into feeling likr they HAVE to respond to everything i send!!#bc sometimes i rly Do Be sending just stuff tht doesnt rly require a response like truly#n i get just not rly having anything to say either so mmmmmm idk#def think im overthinking it all n my dumb pms hormones or w/e are making me overreact as a result but i just wanted to vent a bit#get it off my chest. yk how it is#(i also hope this isnt the One Time one of em decides to hop onto tumblr after YEARS of not using it 🥴🥴)#IM the resident tumblrite so itd be quite a coinkydink if one of em hopped on outta nowhere 😖#...anyways... yeah thats p much it)#i love em!!! i dont think i could Not Love Em!!! but my brain's just bein rejection-sensitive or smthn#n taking the lack of responses twrd my shit as Rejections ig#is wack#end of vent. thanks if u read all this lol
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I got a comic idea so I just wrote down the entire scene I might sketch it out tmw it's gonna be real bad looking teehee
#i also rly want to do some proper in depth studies over time... like focus on one part of the body a week....#i tried it a few years ago n didnt stick w it at all but... i want to try again i need to challenge myself as a person yk#i wanna ask my friends to do it along w me no pressure so maybe we can motivate each other#um but yea i really want to get better at drawing people#right now thats what i enjoy and ik i enjoy it bc im better at it but for now its what i think abt so i may as well get goated#i enjoy still lifes a lot tho. the thing is i only ever do them traditionally and i need to get into the habit of self motivating#woa that was a lot oopsie
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sry 4 being a girl with a special interest in death I just think maybe everybody should have more healthy exposure to death and maybe then wed all be a lot more normal about everything
#basically i think the fact that getting dead bodies out of view As quickly as possible has rly rly rly fucked up our relationship withdeath#i am not at all saying we should just leave bodies in the streets lol but like. i wish it was still commonplace to Care for the body in the#home. yk. obviously this is also a consequence of embalming culture and its all a consequence of the fear of decay. bc we want to think#that even when we die well Live on and we want to thjnk dying is a like. form of immortality..you die and then youre sterile and you stay#the same. and we treat decay like an offense Basically. instead of acknowledging that even though your body js dead there is soo#much life in yr body after you die. yk. i think basically that ppl should allow death 2 just like. be death. and acknowledge that things#change.. ik it isnt rly possible (in some states its illegal to keep the body in the home for more than like. an hour after death iirc)#i just rly rly wish ppl were allowed to be with the body and to take care of it bc i think thats always been SUCH an important part of the#grieving process. it helps you acknowledge that theyre gone and to send them off on your own terms#this is word vomit basically im crazy.
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