#ig? doesnt really fit tho

[lmaowh-at]

Lanns n Starks lineups/costumes sketches that I will probably add other houses to. Tywin and Joff & the rest aren't here because I was lazy and Cerseis dress took all of my energy. Don't ask me about inspiration or historical basis for these

[mastersoftheair]

that's fair! i really do get why people would be upset about croz's relationship with sandra, i do. ig the main thing that bugged me was the idea that sandra's been "reduced" to "just a love interest". episode 6 was divided into 3 parts that focused on 3 of the main guys. and since a 3rd was about croz, his 3rd- by extension- was also about sandra. sandra isn't introduced as a one-note love interest, or anything "reduceable" imo. she's intelligent, quite forward, dedicated to her work, enjoys debate, and an altogether very interesting person (crazy refreshing for an hbo war show). she has agency here. she doesn't exist For croz. it just so happens that croz is there.

her sleeping with croz would've been a decision she made while being fully aware that he's married (she's not dumb). so, obviously a bad look for croz for doing that (he knows better), but it makes sandra interesting to me, too. she's likely a spy. does she have other motivations? is she here to have a good time with a friend? or a 3rd option?

i also guess it didn't turn me off like that bc these shows so often romanticize these men (men in general, really), often at the expense of the female characters. in band of brothers, nix's wife leaves him- and took the dog! compton gets unceremoniously dumped during christmas from over half a world away. also, while not directly connected to the men of easy company, there's that whole scene in carentan where dutch women are publicly shamed and shaved for "sleeping with the germans" (which genuinely disturbed me the first time i watched it, bc nothing about that felt right (just the implications), but then they just...kept it pushing). and in the pacific, outside of lena imo, all the other (two) named women feel like they only exist to be a conquest of some kind or something for the men to angst over.

the men doing the cheating isn't explicitly shown in band of brothers (i feel very doubt.jpg about that tbh). i do think it's Way more implied in the pacific (there's also the "what's the missus think about kitty cat" scene). so, it's there, just not focused on.

(warning: about to get soapboxy) i get that they're called the "Greatest Generation" (this is usually attributed to only the men tho) so, by default, they tend to be deified and deemed untouchable. which is a bit much bc they were just Some Guys (usually in their early 20s). guys in their early 20s are the same no matter the generation imo. they weren't perfect, they had normal flaws (probably exacerbated by their wartime experiences). they likely weren't all that Great if you got to know them. next to all the ww2 movies/shows that are contractually-obligated to sing these guys' praises by any means necessary, i think we'll live if one show wants to go "also, he cheated on his wife". like, i love croz in this show. he's also a man lol. And he's a member of a group that bombs people. idk, weigh it.

as for the german civilians, i took a few classes in undergrad about the holocaust and the second world war (not including my own personal research ft. a shitton of books), so i fully understand that most germans were aware (to varying capacities) of what was going on. i can also see how it'd be hard to devote time to really Showing it in this show (what with the nine episodes, the shorter runtimes, and how Physically Distant these men were to their bomb targets). all they've got room for is scattered speculation and egan seeing up-close-and-personal what bombs like his does to actual communities and the people who live there (they fucking hate his guts). maybe it's hard to force a feeling of sympathy for these people, and it's not the point of the show either.

but idk. for me, the fact that most germans were aware of nazi crimes is what allowed some to do what they could to help. there's hundreds of germans counted in the "righteous among nations", for example. there were (scattered) german resistance groups, like the white rose. there were german protestors and espionage networks. ordinary germans made assasination attempts on hitler's life (they failed, but credit for trying). the crux of it is that there were people who just Tried. it wasn't most of them, sure, but innocent bystanders still existed (not that the main characters would've known that for sure, and tons of viewers don't see it my way, but it personally bothers me more than affairs). i really dislike any narrative that claims "they're all bad people, so they deserve it" bc it's a Hell of a slippery slope.

huge apology for the essay, i understand where you're coming from. i just had to shit say bc i'm chronically opinionated and my brain kept cranking out more words lol

tl;dr- it's ww2. people be cheating.

this isn't even me being a certified CrozGirl (i'm an hbo* war girl, if anything)- but some of the reactions to croz getting it on with sandra feel very "i can excuse war crimes, but i draw the line at extramarital affairs" tbh

[dukeofthomas]

Do you see my vision

[zackcharine]

Kinda sad that i made S2!Pico scared/grossed out of rot and decay when playing with the mental illness spices bc i have the same issues but im the polar oposite about it JFHFHDH and i feel the urge to project that somewhere...

[erythristicbones]

opened my doc for HWC to make some character changes and there's...an entire chapter-by-chapter outline for the book?? when tf did i do that??? i literally have only done that much outlining for stories that i am currently/plan on writing soon and HWC was never intended to be high on my priority list

[diorkyeom]

‘✷’ : CHAPTER THREE “cotton fluffy smiles”

<< prev chapter | ao3 fic | next chapter >>

chapter word count: 5.9k+ (idk why but they keep getting longer and longer...)

chapter warnings: swearing

summary: "lately, seokmin had come to a realisation. joshua hong, seokmin thought, was a little bit of an enigma." - in which seokmin has known joshua for years, but he's always been a bit of a mystery to him. and as the days go by, he finds himself falling further and further for the enigmatic man, wanting to find out who the real Joshua Hong is behind his polite smiles and warm eyes and sweet words.

notes: if i had a nickel for every time i've had characters have deep conversations late at night on benches surrounded by nature, i'd be able to make money out of this whole fanfic writing thing

It may be a Monday, but Seokmin swore that his head was still pounding with a phantom hangover from the Friday night two weeks ago. 

Or—no. Maybe it wasn’t the hangover. Maybe it was something else.

Someone else.

Because, oh boy. Ever since that Game Night, the surge of Joshua-ness in Seokmin’s life had seemed to increase. 

It was odd how, two months ago, Joshua had simply been Jeonghan’s Bestie™ as he had been for years, nothing more than the polite and sweet man who had seamlessly entered their group and labelled himself as the lovely gentleman. Seokmin had been rather content keeping it that way. He hadn’t known any different, after all. 

But now, everything had changed.

Even this early on a Monday morning, while at work, Seokmin was thinking about him.

Not only was Seokmin still seeing Joshua at every other turn, he also couldn’t get him out of his brain. Couldn’t stop thinking about Joshua’s soft and bright eyes and the curl of his lips and the way his voice could be so gentle and so mischievous at the same time. Couldn’t stop thinking of the ways that Joshua had looked at him, eyes flashing with something before dissolving sweetly, like cotton candy, always barely decipherable but still most definitely there.

Joshua was very cotton soft, Seokmin mused thoughtfully. Everything about him was gentle. It was like a cotton wrap, fluffy and soft but protecting something underneath. Something even prettier, and sometimes, sometimes, Seokmin thought he could see it, whenever Joshua’s eyes twinkled when he looked at him. Maybe. Underneath his cotton fluffy smile.

Seokmin blinked himself out of his haze of Joshua thinking, looking at his students bent over the worksheets he’d given them, and sighed. He took the pen he’d been nervously chewing out of his mouth. 

This was unacceptable. The next time he saw Joshua, he was going to scold him for somehow managing to invade his every waking thought. Definitely.

A beat. 

Seokmin went back to chewing his pen.

───────────── ‘✷,

Seokmin groaned, walking over to Soonyoung's bed and face planting into the mattress. 

The owner of said mattress didn't even look up from his phone, absentmindedly rubbing Seokmin's back in an attempt at being consoling. "What did you do now?" 

Seokmin mumbled something intelligible, and Soonyoung hummed in sympathy. 

"I see."

"No, you don't," Seokmin whined, moving his head to the side so he was no longer suffocating himself in Soonyoung's sheets. "He's constantly in my head! I can't get him out."

"Oho, boy troubles?" Soonyoung said, lips twitching upwards even as he stayed glued to his phone. "Just confess, Seokmin. It's time you stopped being a chicken."

Seokmin just groaned again. “You don’t even know who the guy is. And it’s not like that.”

“Well, I know you,” Soonyoung returned, “and you’re a chicken. Maybe today’s the day you finally man up and ask the guy out, you know?”

“I don’t like him! He’s just in my head and I want him out.”

“Do you really, though?” Soonyoung said teasingly, and chuckled when Seokmin whined even louder. “You gonna tell me who the guy is?”

There was a rustling sound, and Seokmin peeked his head up to look at Soonyoung, ears red. “It’s no one.”

Soonyoung finally looked away from his phone, looking down at Seokmin. And then he smiled, tilting his head. “Cool name. Well, I dunno what you want me to say, Seokmin. If you don’t like him, then what? Want me to ask Jihoon to kill the guy for you?”

“No!” Seokmin scrambled into a sitting position. “Don’t do that!” And then, more curiously, “Can Jihoon hyung actually kill people if you ask him to?”

Soonyoung laughed. “Maybe. You’ll have to ask him.”

Seokmin muttered something to that, and promptly keeled over to faceplant into the mattress again. Soonyoung simply took another look at him before going back to his phone.

The sun was setting, and the sky was a comfortable warm colour, not too blinding and not too dark, casting orangeish light into the room. Somewhere outside, a child screamed. It was the perfect sort of atmosphere for the two roommates, one of them peacefully scrolling on their phone and the other having a mild crisis into the mattress.

After a moment, Seokmin lifted his head. “Hyung.” 

“Wait.” Soonyoung snapped his head upwards suddenly, eyes wide. “Shit. I have a bunch of emails I need to respond to by tonight.”

“What’s your opinion of—wait, where are you going? Hyung! Hyung, I’m tryna ask you a question!” 

Soonyoung didn’t even look back as he leapt off the bed, scrambling to find his laptop. Seokmin pouted, watching his roommate shuffle through his stuff and then kept talking anyway. 

"Hey, what's your opinion of Joshua hyung?"

"Did you just 'hey' me?" Soonyoung said, but it was said in a tone that showed he wasn't really listening to Seokmin. "Where the hell has my goddamn laptop gone?"

Seokmin watched him, shifting on the bed so that he was sitting cross-legged, tilting his head. "Didn't Mingyu break your laptop a couple of days ago?"

Soonyoung paused, eyes wide. "Oh no." He scrambled to find his phone. "Has that little fucker managed to get it repaired yet? I swear, if he hasn't—"

"What's your opinion of Joshua hyung?" Seokmin repeated, but Soonyoung already had his phone to his ear and was not paying the slightest bit of attention to him. 

"Mingyu? Mingyu! Where the shit is my laptop? Huh? What do you mean you lost it? Please tell me you at least managed to get it repaired before losing it. Wh—why did you let Junhui touch my stuff?"

Seokmin rolled his eyes before sticking out his bottom lip, pouting over the fact that Soonyoung was apparently more preoccupied with looking for his laptop than answering his question. Granted, the laptop was a little bit more important, but Mingyu lost stuff all the time. Wonwoo had probably hidden it somewhere in their shared apartment for safekeeping until Soonyoung remembered he even needed it and called for them. 

"Wonwoo! You have my laptop?"

Soonyoung sounded relieved, and Seokmin shrugged internally. See. He was right. 

But it was evident that Soonyoung wasn't going to be listening to him, so he slid off the elder's bed and went to his own room, trying to consider what his own opinion of Joshua hyung was. 

───────────── ‘✷,

None of the people in their friend group worked in the same school as Seokmin. 

None of them were teachers, anyway, so it would have been weird, but his school was near the various coffee shops that their group frequented, so whenever Seokmin finished work and decided to grab a coffee and some pastries before going home, there was almost always going to be someone who walked into the cafe a few minutes after him. 

This time, that person happened to be Minghao.

Minghao spotted Seokmin sitting in a booth near the corner, and nodded and waved at him in greeting. Seokmin waved back, grinning, and sipped his coffee as Minghao ordered his own drink before sitting down opposite him.

“How are you?” Seokmin asked brightly, hands curled around his coffee cup like he was a little child. 

Minghao simply groaned in response, propping his elbow up on the table. “Exhausted. Hoshi hyung has been texting me constantly, asking for tips on how to ‘properly word an acceptance email’. Like I’ll know how to write one.”

Seokmin laughed. “That sounds like something he’d do, though. Hyung’s weird like that.”

“You’re telling me,” Minghao remarked drily, smiling politely and thanking the server who brought him his milk tea and plate of cookies. “He was blowing up my phone the entire morning.”

"Only the morning?" Seokmin asked. "What, did you finally give in to his spamming?"

"No, I blocked him."

Seokmin blinked, and then laughed, nodding understandingly. "Best choice. He's gonna pester me to get you to unblock him when I get home, though."

Minghao smiled, that small smile where his smile lines deepened and his eyes twinkled. "I regret nothing."

There was a brief respite in conversation as Minghao stirred his drink and took a careful sip. Seokmin hummed thoughtfully, staring into the distance before snapping his gaze back to Minghao, who was still drinking his tea.

“What’s your opinion of Joshua hyung?”

Minghao choked, wiping his mouth with a napkin. “Wh—so suddenly?”

“I’m full of surprises,” Seokmin chirped, and waited until Minghao finished coughing to start speaking again. “So, what is your opinion of him?”

“Why are you asking me?” Minghao asked, and then looked behind him as if this was a prank. There was only one other person having coffee at five in the evening, an old lady who was staring at the teaspoon her coffee had come with as if it had somehow offended her. “And why do I feel like you were waiting to interrogate me?”

“I wasn’t waiting for you specifically,” Seokmin said, shrugging. “Anyone would have done.”

“Gee, thanks, Seokmin.”

Seokmin waved his hands. “You’re still not answering my question though! What do you think about Joshua hyung?”

“I don’t know,” Minghao said, mildly confused and mildly exasperated, like he was dealing with a child’s random changes of conversation topics. “He’s a good person? Nice, and good at listening.”

Seokmin frowned thoughtfully. “Hm.”

He stared off into the distance, and Minghao observed him curiously before shaking his head and turning back to his coffee. 

This was the thing, though. No one had much to say about Joshua, did they? Granted, Seokmin had only been able to ask Minghao (seeing as how Soonyoung had been incredibly rudely ignoring him in favour of finding his laptop) but he was sure that every response to his question was going to be much the same as Minghao's. 

But, just to make sure, Seokmin turned to him and asked another question. 

"What's your opinion on Mingyu?"

"An idiot," Minghao replied immediately. "Full of himself. Adorably annoying." He eyed Seokmin oddly. "Why are you asking? Again?"

Seokmin made his eyes as wide and as innocent as possible. "Nothing! I just wanna know how you feel about our dear friends."

Minghao pursed his lips, disbelieving, giving Seokmin his signature dirty look. The cookie crumbs around his mouth kind of dampened the effect, but Seokmin's smile turned sheepish anyway. 

"You're plotting something," Minghao said finally. "Aren't you?"

“What? I’m not! Nothing’s wrong,” Seokmin said. He grinned as brightly as possible. Minghao looked at him suspiciously for a few more moments, and so he dropped the grin and leaned forward. “Do you have anything else to say about Joshua hyung, though?” he asked curiously. “Like, is that it?”

Instead of answering, Minghao just continued to eye him, lips pursed. “Why would I have anything to say about him?” He narrowed his eyes. “Did you say something to him? Did he say something to you?”

Seokmin shook his head rapidly. “No! I was just curious, you know? I haven’t talked to him that much, that’s all.”

Minghao folded his hands on top of the table, and suddenly Seokmin felt like he was the one being interrogated. “And what made you think that I had?”

He shrugged. “Just asking.” He quirked a grin. “I told you, anyone would have done. I’m just wondering what everyone else thinks of him, ‘cause to me he’s only Jeonghan’s housemate.”

“Really?” Minghao looked like he was going to say more, before simply giving a smile. “Okay.”

And then he promptly changed the subject, so fast that Seokmin had whiplash and was left blinking dumbly before picking up Minghao’s new conversation thread a few seconds later. Minghao's eyes were gleaming, looking like he’d gleaned interesting new information out of him and, not wanting to find out what exactly Minghao had thought he’d extracted from him, Seokmin decided to go with it.

Minghao had given him an answer enough, anyway. Seokmin had half his brain focused on Minghao’s rant on how the failures of humanity were affecting his ability to buy eggs while the other half was still thinking about what he’d said. Contrary to popular belief, Seokmin could multitask, thank you very much. To an extent.

But it was interesting, the way Minghao had described him, because the answer was so… boring. Joshua felt more than just nice, more than just a good person, but even for Seokmin, that was all he was able to say about him. 

Surely, though, surely there was more to Joshua than just being a nice guy.

───────────── ‘✷,

"Good morning, Seokmin. To what do I owe the pleasure of a phone call from you on a Tuesday morning?" 

Instead of answering, Seokmin asked his own question the minute Mingyu picked up the phone. "What's your opinion of Joshua hyung?"

Seokmin was on the bus, on his way to work. After his conversation with Minghao last evening, he was determined to carry on his ‘experiment’ to see if anyone else had anything additional to say about Joshua. Soonyoung had been out for most of the night, having complications at work, so Seokmin had been left pondering who else he could ask in order to gather evidence for his experiment.

And so, he’d landed on Mingyu. Mingyu had weird opinions on everyone. He also had weird stories to tell about stuff he’d experienced with them, making him the perfect person to ask about the weirdly elusive nature of Joshua.

"Wait. What?"

“What’s your opinion of Joshua hyung?” Seokmin repeated. “Like, what do you think about him?”

“He’s… cool?” The confusion was radiating from Mingyu’s voice in waves. “Seokmin. I have to leave for work in fifteen minutes and you’re calling to ask what my opinion of Joshua is?”

“Okay, but what else?” Seokmin pressed, decidedly ignoring Mingyu’s rhetorical question. “Is that it? Joshua hyung is ‘cool’?”

“There’s nothing wrong with being a cool guy,” Mingyu said, somehow sounding even more confused than before. “Uh, he’s really bad at bowling too?”

Cool. Nice. They were essentially synonyms when it came to describing personality, weren’t they? Seokmin frowned, staring out of the window contemplatively while Mingyu continued rambling on. 

But there were nuances to the descriptions, something that made the two words ever so slightly different. Joshua was this ‘generally good’ person, enigmatic in the sense that he had this base niceness on which he altered certain parts of his personality to fit everyone else he was talking to.

“Would you say Joshua hyung is likeable?” Seokmin asked then, talking over the stream of Mingyu’s voice.

“What?”

Seokmin rolled his eyes. Mingyu was going deaf. “I said—”

“Look, I really gotta pee, but how about you talk to Wonwoo hyung for a bit? Ask him all the, uh, other stuffs about Joshua you wanna talk about.”

And then there was shuffling on the other end of the line, and another voice filled Seokmin’s ears.

“Seokmin?”

“Wonwoo hyung!” Seokmin immediately brightened. This could be another person to ask for his experiment. “Will you help me with an experiment?”

“Experiment?” Wonwoo asked. “What’s the hypothesis?”

Hypothesis? “Uh, none,” Seokmin said. “I’m just trying to gather… opinions?”

Wonwoo hummed. “Well, okay. What do you wanna ask?”

“What’s your opinion of Joshua hyung?”

There was a slight pause, and Seokmin looked up to realise that his stop was fast approaching. After a moment, Wonwoo let out a laugh, a rumbly exhale of air that showed he was mildly amused by Seokmin’s question.

“Why are you so interested in our Joshua hyung, Seokmin?” he asked. 

His voice was distinctly teasing, sounding like he was almost laughing at him, and it was the same sort of tone as the look in Minghao’s eyes last evening, where they both gave Seokmin the feeling like they had found out something about him, even though there was nothing to find out. It made Seokmin want to roll his eyes and vehemently deny whatever they were suggesting, but he didn’t even know what they were suggesting, and it would only prove to them that he actually was whatever they were saying, and he didn’t want that.

So, instead of answering, Seokmin chirped, “Oh! I gotta get off the bus now! What a shame. Good luck at work today, and send my virtual fist-shaking to Mingyu too!” before promptly hanging up.

Wonwoo’s laughter still rang in his ears as he stepped off the bus, looking confusedly down at his phone as he walked down the street. 

Everyone was acting like Seokmin was the weird one for his question. And okay, maybe it was weird to immediately start a conversation with “What’s your opinion on our friend?”, but it wasn’t overly weird. No weirder than how no one seemed to know that much about Joshua which, in Seokmin’s opinion, was the weirdest thing of all.

───────────── ‘✷,

“You’re the weirdest thing of all,” Seungkwan said, and Seokmin wondered yet again why they ever let this little gremlin into their apartment.

“Uh huh,” Seokmin glanced at Seungkwan as the younger followed him into the bathroom while he rummaged for a spare toothbrush. “Says you, Kwan.”

Seungkwan was staying over at their apartment again. Well, it was more of Seungkwan was invading their apartment because he couldn't be bothered to go back to his own after they'd gone out for brunch with Jihoon and Seokmin was too nice to say no and kick him out, but it was the same thing. 

“Seriously! I can't believe you refused his offer,” Seungkwan said, and Seokmin groaned.

“Can you please drop it?”

“Never,” Seungkwan declared, and stationed himself in front of the bathroom door, blocking his escape out of the room. “How many times have I said it? You have an ethereal voice, hyung! And how am I just finding out that Jihoon hyung himself offered to pull a few strings to get you signed to a label if you wanted to?”

Seokmin simply shrugged, and bodily shoved himself past Seungkwan. The younger wasn't nearly half as intimidating as he thought, especially when Seokmin knew he could probably throw Seungkwan over his shoulder without batting an eye. The guy was ridiculously light. 

“I don’t know why hyung brought it up at today’s brunch,” Seokmin said, walking out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. “Besides, that was ages ago. I like teaching.”

"But hyung, you could've been famous!" Seungkwan protested. "Like, really famous! I can imagine you already: heartthrob idol Seokmin whose face is plastered all over designer brand advertisements and lands male-lead acting roles in his spare time." He said the last part dramatically, hands in the air like he was creating an imaginary banner with those exact words. "What do you think?"

Seokmin laughed, opening up a cupboard and pulling out a packaged toothbrush. "I think I would have hated it," he said, turning back to Seungkwan. "Singing for my job, for all those people…" He shook his head. "I don't think I would have liked that."

Seungkwan whined. "Come on, hyung, you're as much of an attention seeker as me! You'd have loved it!"

"No," Seokmin replied simply, smiling. "It would give me anxiety more than anything, I think." He pushed the toothbrush into Seungkwan's hands, forcefully trying to change the subject. "Anyway, here! New toothbrush. Thank Soonyoung hyung for that one, because I'm pretty sure that it's from his pile of spare ones."

Instantly, Seungkwan's eyes lit up, lifting up the bright orange toothbrush. "Thanks, hyung! The other one you gave me was getting really, really damaged."

Seokmin hummed amusedly. "What were you doing with it? Scrubbing your teeth to death?"

Seungkwan continued chattering, the previous subject now forgotten, as they walked back out of the kitchen. 

It was something that the younger brought up, a lot, whenever he remembered it. The idea of Seokmin becoming a singer, or a musical theatre actor, or something along those lines was something that Seungkwan was weirdly passionate about, adamant that Seokmin had a voice that was being unjustly hidden from the world. 

But, well. Seokmin didn't want to. Singing was simply stress relief for him, saved for unhinged karaoke nights and when he walked around their empty apartment while Soonyoung was out. Professions involving music were for people like Soonyoung and Seungkwan and Jihoon, who healed people with their dance or their songs, who touched people’s hearts with the beauty of their music.

It wasn’t a Seokmin thing, he thought. No matter what Seungkwan said, Seokmin was pretty sure his voice left much to be desired.

Besides, he liked teaching. Liked helping others, giving away parts of himself, seeing his children grow and flourish into beautiful beings under his instruction. Every child was different, and Seokmin adored being able to nurture each and every one of them until they learned to grow on their own. 

He liked being a child’s inspiration, their support, being someone who could guide them in their lives. Helping others was, really, the thing he wanted to do the most.

“I’m not helping you memorise your lines,” he said, sitting down on the couch. “You have other friends, Seungkwan. And I’m busy! Do you know how many pieces of homework I still have to mark? Too many!”

Seungkwan groaned, flopping down next to Seokmin. “Come on, they’re all busy too! And no one is as fun. Can’t you help me practise? Please?”

There was the sound of the front door clicking open, and Seokmin lifted his head up. “Hey, ask Soonyoung hyung! I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to help you.”

“He won’t,” Seungkwan complained. “He never goes over my lines with me. See? Look at the way he walks into the room. He's practically radiating 'I-won't-help-Seungkwan' vibes." Seungkwan waved. "Hi, hyung."

Soonyoung, weirdly, didn't even bat an eye, and hummed in greeting at Seungkwan before dropping his duffel next to the couch. He looked bewildered. “Seokmin, why have you been going round asking our friends what their opinion of Joshua hyung is?”

Seokmin choked as Seungkwan turned to stare at him, wide-eyed. 

"You've been doing what?"

"Who—who told you?" Seokmin stammered, face heating up. 

Soonyoung just shook his head, still looking lost. "Jeonghan hyung said that Joshua hyung said that Junhui said that Minghao and Wonwoo and Mingyu said that you asked them."

Seungkwan blinked. "Wait, what?"

Seokmin just groaned, covering his reddening ears and keeling over to the side so he could bury his face into the cushions. "Why would they expose me like that?"

"I'm just so confused," Soonyoung said, scratching his head. "What were you doing? Jeonghan said that Joshua's really confused too."

Seokmin groaned louder at that, and attempted to become one with the sofa. 

Seungkwan looked between the two of them, wringing his hands in exasperation. "What has been going on?"

"Oh, Jeonghan hyung said that Joshua hyung said that—"

"No, I got that part," Seungkwan interrupted, waving his hands at Soonyoung. "Well. Kind of. But what happened?" He turned to Seokmin, slapping his back. "Why?"

Seokmin didn't answer, too busy wallowing into the upholstery. "Why does Jeonghan hyung always end up knowing?" he complained, rolling onto his back. "I asked Wonwoo hyung and Mingyu, like, last week. I stopped after that because hyung was suggesting something weird—"

"Jeonghan always ends up knowing everything—" Seungkwan pointed out. 

"—and I don't even know what he was trying to suggest!" Seokmin carried on, flailing his hands towards the ceiling. "But it was weird, and Minghao looked at me weirdly too, like it wasn't completely normal to wonder why no one actually knows anything about Joshua hyung at all. So I dropped it! But now Yoon Jeonghan is involved and Joshua knows I was talking about him and now everything is awkward!"

He flopped over onto his front again, whining, and Seungkwan and Soonyoung exchanged equally baffled looks. 

"Okay," Soonyoung said, "I don't know why you were doing that, but. Yeah. That's a bit weird."

"We know tons of stuff about Joshua hyung," Seungkwan added, waving the toothbrush around as he talked. "Like, he's bad at charades, leads the church choir, and he's someone with iron will to put up with Jeonghan hyung for so long!"

Seokmin mumbled something into the cushions again. 

"I think you're thinking about hyung way too much," Soonyoung said, ruffling Seokmin's hair. "Is he your crush? The guy you couldn't get out of your brain?"

Seungkwan's eyes widened. "You have a crush on Joshua hyung?"

"I don't!" Seokmin yelped, and sat up so fast that his head spun a little. "I was just telling you how we know nothing about him. How can you have a crush on a guy you don't know?"

"It happens all the time," Soonyoung said solemnly, and Seungkwan nodded in agreement. 

Seokmin looked at them, before pouting and crossing his arms, huffing. "Joshua hyung's just… really slippery, you know? I can't understand him, and I just kind of want to."

Soonyoung wiggled his eyebrows at that, with the exact same glint in his eyes as Minghao had had, and Seokmin groaned again, pushing him away and standing up from the sofa.

"You two are insufferable," he said, backing out of the living room. He pointed a finger accusingly at them. "Hyung, I'm kicking you out. Seungkwan, I changed my mind, you're not allowed to sleep over. Give back the toothbrush."

"What? No! You gave it to me, it's mine now!" Seungkwan protested, clutching the still-packaged orange and black toothbrush to his chest. Soonyoung narrowed his eyes. 

"Hey, wait, that looks a lot like the toothbrushes that I bought."

"Huh? Um, Seokmin brought it out for me—"

"Seokmin! Did you seriously give my spare tiger-coloured toothbrush to Seungkwan?"

───────────── ‘✷,

It had to be at least two in the morning by the time Seokmin managed to extricate himself from Seungkwan's grabby hands and tiptoe over Soonyoung's sprawled-out form to get to the front door and leave the apartment. 

Seungkwan was a clingy sleeper, latching onto whoever was next to him, and Soonyoung liked to take command of the entire space wherever he slept. That was why, whenever Seungkwan stayed the night, they didn't normally all sleep in the same space, because someone was bound to either get poked in the eye or squeezed to death. But that night, they'd done it, on the floor of the living room, Soonyoung snoring almost directly into Seokmin's feet before he'd stood up and exited the room. 

Seokmin didn't know where he was going, not really, but he'd felt an urge to leave the apartment and go somewhere on his own, and that was exactly what he was doing. 

It wasn’t exactly cold, but the wind certainly felt a little vindictive at having discovered that there was still a living, breathing, thing walking down the streets in the middle of the night, and Seokmin tucked his hands into the pockets of his flimsy black jacket and wished that he’d put on trainers or something rather than just wearing a pair of sliders.

But even with the wind whispering displeasedly down his neck, Seokmin still thought that this was nice. The world was so… quiet. Like not a single thought was being uttered into existence.

It felt like Seokmin could scream the loudest thoughts into his brain and the silence of the night would simply let them fade away. 

He hummed to himself as he walked down the street, walking across a road bridge before pausing, backtracking, and leaning against the railing to look down at the river below. 

It was dark, even with all the street lamps and flashing store signs, but Seokmin could just make out the silhouette of a person sitting on a bench by the river. They weren't moving, and the longer Seokmin stared, the more his eyes adjusted to the dark and he thought, hm. That person looked familiar. 

It was how he found himself going down a set of stairs beside the bridge, walking along the riverside until he drew closer to the person on the bench, their side profile becoming clearer, until he could make out a delicate, sloping nose and fluffy hair and he thought—well. The gods and their weird act of blessing his one specific wish had struck again. 

"Hello," Seokmin said brightly, before wincing at how loud his voice sounded in the silence of the night. "Rather late for you to be outside, don't you think?"

Joshua turned his head at Seokmin's voice, and for a brief moment there was a golden sheen to his eyes that Seokmin didn't think he'd ever seen before, all melting and open and vulnerable before he blinked and smiled that cotton-fluffy smile which he always seemed to be smiling at Seokmin with these days.

(How did Joshua used to smile at him? Seokmin wasn't sure he knew.) 

"Well," Joshua said, irises twinkling white-gold, "depends on how you think of it. Maybe it's too early."

Seokmin smiled, sitting down next to Joshua. "Fair enough."

Neither of them said anything more, the sound of the rushing water filling the air. The breeze was still ruffling Seokmin's hair, but it was less biting, as if it had softened, shy, at Joshua's presence. 

Or maybe that was just Seokmin's own thoughts. 

He glanced over at Joshua and had to blink rapidly, feeling like the wind had been knocked out of him because wow, Joshua was so pretty. There were few lamp posts along the river, and Joshua's face was lit up in a faint glow, his eyelashes creating gentle smudges against his cheeks every time he blinked. He didn't look at Seokmin, continuing to stare out at the dark river, and Seokmin wondered whether it was really fair that some people were able to look so beautiful while doing absolutely nothing. 

Seokmin's friends were by no means bad looking either, and it was practically like a hazing ritual for them to all have had a crush on Mingyu for like a week before he opened his mouth and the crush instantly melted away. 

But Joshua? Joshua was just… pretty. A mesmerising sort of pretty, where it looked like the tip of his nose was dusted with gold and his hair looked like a soft mess of clouds. 

Seokmin had no idea how he hadn't noticed it before. 

"—min? Seokmin?"

He blinked rapidly, muttering an eloquent "Huh?" while Joshua tilted his head amusedly. 

Joshua laughed, a small bell-like sound, like he found Seokmin incredibly endearing. "Are you okay? You were spacing out on me there."

“Oh. Yeah,” Seokmin said after a long moment, after he’d managed to remember how words worked again. “Sorry. I’m just really tired, I think.”

“Tired?” Joshua asked. “Why aren’t you sleeping then?”

Seokmin just shrugged. “Can't. I don’t know, it just feels like I need to be out here.” He nudged Joshua with his shoulder. “What about you, hyung? Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“I don’t need sleep,” he said easily, leaning back against the bench. “Besides, it’s calming out here, don’t you think?”

It really was. There was an almost otherworldly beauty to things when one experienced them at night, and the tranquillity of the riverside would have probably had Minghao tearing up in awe, but Seokmin couldn't focus on all of that anymore. 

Joshua really was always in his head, and while it was still a little weird, Seokmin didn’t mind it. There were worse people to have stuck in your head, after all, and Joshua was just so interesting to Seokmin, with his kindness and the subtle changing of colours in his personality whenever he talked to someone new. He could never really anticipate what Joshua would do next, and yet at the same time, everything he did was also so in character for him.

“So, how was your day today?” Joshua asked softly, and as he turned to look at Seokmin, his eyes were so gentle that it had his brain melting for a moment.

“It was okay,” he said, having to look away briefly. “Seungkwan is staying over with us tonight.”

“You have a guest?” Joshua said. “And yet you abandoned him?”

“Hey, Seungkwan’s properly knocked out. Soonyoung hyung and I will probably have to yell into his ear with a megaphone tomorrow to get him to wake up,” Seokmin said, and Joshua laughed. 

“It sounds like you’ve done it before.”

Seokmin shrugged. “Seungkwan stays over a lot. He also oversleeps. A lot.”

“Well, he’s lucky that he has you to be more than willing to help him wake up,” Joshua said, chuckling. “It’s a wonder his eardrums are still intact.”

“From all the yelling he does, I’m surprised my eardrums are still intact,” Seokmin said, rubbing his ears. “At this rate, I’m gonna go deaf in like 5 years. But I guess I can’t really say anything,” he added thoughtfully, “because I’m too loud as well. It’s on my to-do list to try and be quieter, actually.”

Joshua hummed. “You want to be quieter?”

“Yeah.” Seokmin laughed a little. “Wow, I haven’t told anyone this before. But I guess… I’m just a really noisy person? I’m pretty sure it irritates people a lot. So I’m trying to be quieter these days. Like, not yelling all the time, you know? Unless I’m at school,” he said. “Because sometimes the children don’t quieten down unless you’re yelling your head off at them.”

He tried to play off the end as a joke, because Joshua was looking at him properly now, and the softness in his eyes hadn’t gone away but he looked more… serious.

“I don’t think you’re noisy,” Joshua said. “Maybe you talk a lot, but you’re saying things, things which are important.” He smiled a little. “Maybe what you say has varying degrees of importance, but it’s not gibberish. It’s not irrelevant.” 

Joshua lifted his hand and brushed a finger over Seokmin’s cheekbone, so lightly and so briefly that if he’d blinked he would have missed it.

“You’re not noise, Seokmin. You’re important.”

Seokmin blinked, surprised by the sincerity in Joshua’s voice, his cheek stained red from where Joshua’s fingers had brushed against it. He took a shaky breath, scrambling to gather his rapidly-melting thoughts and managed to grin. 

“Aw, hyung, I’m glad you think so," he said, brightly. "I still think I need to tone it down a little, though. Maybe it’ll encourage Soonyoung and Seungkwan to stop being so ear-splittingly loud as well.”

Joshua didn’t say anything for a short moment, before letting out a quiet sigh. “Alright. I bet those two get into screaming matches every other day, though, so it might take a while.”

Seokmin laughed at that, thinking about what had happened only a few hours ago with Soonyoung's toothbrush. “They do, they really do.”

He turned back to Joshua again, and found the elder to already be watching him, a slight smile on his face. “What’s the most ridiculous thing they fought over?” Joshua asked, and smiled wider when Seokmin immediately launched into the tale of ‘Soonyoung and Seungkwan and the Plate of Biscuits’.

The wind ruffled Joshua’s hair and nipped at Seokmin’s nose, but neither of them seemed to care as they sat by the river, a small smile permanently on Joshua’s face as he listened to Seokmin talk.

Seokmin left only when the sun had begun to rise in the sky, looking back at Joshua still on the bench, watching the way the dawn painted his face orange-gold and made him look like a bronze statue of some ancient, beautiful deity.

taglist (interact here/ send ask to be added): @fairyhaos @atinytinaa @my-moarmy-heart @weird-life-of-a-closet-fangirl @lilsafsafbooyah @stqrrgirle @bittersweet-folder @weird-bookworm @ultrara-re @tianakings @bangantokchy @tiinkerbell @ahuiahoe

[wytheriing]

hello pretty blood community i come bearing this, fucking Thing

oc info under the cut ig

vi sarah is pretty much immortal with how much she regenerates and she found that out via suicide attempt. good news tho she also found out she likes pain but bad news she cant die

shes considered a bit of an idol but pretty blood wont hire her because shes not really fit to torture other people, and while she does scream and cry out in pain when shes hurt, deep down everyone knows she doesnt REALLY die. but there IS a niche audience for her so all her own videos are homemade :]

every now and then she gets a gig with pretty blood like. more as a freelance "idol" and shell get killed creatively. her dream is to be killed by rinny or dream terror (eluca) despite thinking she has no talent. she loves the camera. she also wants pretty blood to fund and find a way to permanently kill her but alas. they wont let her in :(

anyways. since shes got a niche audience for her own diy homemade "films" she basically makes videos and streams and stuff of herself dying over and over and thats how she makes money

vi sarah goes by her stagename and abandoned her real name. shes got psychological trauma but she doesnt wanna exploit that unless its in a gig with rinny because they're special pain <3

her power regenerates her within a couple of hours for most major regular injuries. for something like being straight up beheaded, her body reanimates within the next few minutes to attach its head back on. if its chopped to the tiniest bits and piece, it'll start growing back at the largest piece closest to the heart and take about a week to recover

her body automatically purges itself of any and all diseases, and parasites die almost immediately upon entering her body. if its a particularly strong parasite (like the necro worm) then the parasite is "poisoned" by the effect of the regeneration, but the regeneration cannot be spread via this parasite. once this parasite is "poisoned", it will die within the next thirty minutes even if its stripped from the body and transferred to another. (add a few more months if trapped in cryostasis)

she dislikes the torture and death of other humans/malino, but is more apathetic to it when exposed to it. she can easily blend in with society but frequently gets mistaken as a klutz because shes always seen with bandages

other non-fucked up things: she loves all things sleep-related and has THE comfiest bed because she loves to nap for long periods of time. she loves all things pastry and sweet and is almost never seen without either a pillow/plush to sleep on or a pastry to eat

[caramelpenguin]

S3 EP6 (thoughts + theories)

I want to get all the insane predictions out so I can look back on how much I clowned.🤡

These are ideas based on the moments that were in the trailer/teasers/stills. Or things that I feel might be addressed before the end...

Hillerska closing down🏫

We aren't directly told what Felice said in her interview. It's left ambiguous. So why wouldn't they tell us? Sure, there's a chance that she just praised the school but....

we got that very small snippet of the forest ridge boys yelling at each other. Could this be because they heard that Hillerska was going to shut down?

Simon (and his family) might move away 👋

they have the money now ig. this could be a reason why the ending, as ive seen around, has occasionally been described as 'open'.

this could be the context behind the shot of Linda's head on Simon's shoulder.

or maybe the 3 of them are doing smthn related to micke?

Abdication or King Wille? And August...👑

I think one of the reasons for August's storyline this season was for us to understand him more as a character so that if he becomes King, we know that he'll actually try or that he may not have been as bad as we thought. (my opinion of August isn't necessary here).

we really see how much the monarchy consumes Wille this season. Though I don't know how we'd approach the topic of abdication in just one episode.

wille has said that one of the reasons he wants to remain Crown Prince is bcos of Erik. Knowing what we now know, i'm intrigued as to what will happen.

will they acknowledge more of August's eating disorder?

August and Sara🤔

I think felice will (eventually) be fine with it. I don't know about Simon.

Things will work out, i'm sure.

Frederika and Stella💵

....they'll kiss in ep6. something will happen between them, anyway.

Shot of the 4 girls hugging

frederika has realises she likes stella by this point??

Roussea?🐎

maybe Roussea will get a slight mention in a conversation with August. Or maybe not. Who knowwwss

Wilmon screaming in the car🚗

is this Sara's car? things need to be okay by this point, right? is it after the lake scene??

Wilmon stare down👀

how? will ? this? fit? in?

is it after the graduation ceremony but before the neon party and the lake scene? does the shot of wille (with simon's hands around his neck) come after this?

is the lake scene not the final scene? is this scene actually the next day during the graduation?

does simon tell wille he's going to move away?

The Neon Party + Lake Scene 💧

the neon party is where they reconcile.

BUT i dont think it'll be a full reconcile. Simon's line 'Can't we just forget everything that's happened? Just for tonight?' makes sense to be here.

the lake scene with the swimming could happen because they both leave the party early, i dunno.

is this the last time they're able to hang out (bcos simon is moving away and bcos Hillerska will shut down)?

but we've all SEEN that it looks sad, which doesnt look all that great for endgame, and we've also been told that this is (most likely) the final scene. so. get tissues ready.

(am i crazy or is there a tiny smile on simons face in this scene? from that edmar promo we got? )

swimming happens after the sadness right? bcos (apart from the tears) they dont look wet.

if its the final scene idk what the hopes r for wilmon endgame icl

MUSIC (+Wille's birthday present)🎶

we know that 'Alice' by Rhys will play at some point. Doesn't mean it'll be a wilmon scene. it could be sara and august OR frederika and stella (?)

normally, there's a song in ep4 that's repeated in the final moments of the season. ep 4 in s3 doesn't end with a song and (from the one check I've done), i can't really hear any of the other songs used in that episode as the final song of the season. then again, i could be wrong

ELIAS SONG?? they could play 'revolution' again to make it a full circle (dont think this will happen tho). they might use a new song. i just rlly hope we'll hear an Elias song and...i feel like we will.

THE TRAILER SONG? I really pray this will be in the episode. I pray i pray i pray i-

we'll hear Simon's new song. I don't know how or when (especially if this is simon's gift to wille) but...c'mon

initially, i didn't think Redlight would appear in YR. Omar has a career outside of the show, but i do agree that the lyrics fit wilmon quite well. also, if we're gonna hear Simon's new song then I don't know how the script would work around Simon singing another song. He told Wille that his present isn't yet finished (which im sure is the song simon is currently working on), tho ig we could argue that he may sing a brand new song.

BUT then i realised that simon doesn't have to sing this song. redlight could just be part of the soundtrack ( it seems that everyone got to that conclusion before me). and the way that it's being promoted this week has me suspicious. I don't wanna get my hopes up, and maybe Omar is just being clever and promoting it during the week of YR hype, so i dont think redlight will be in s3. BUT I WILL BE VERY HAPPY IF IM WRONG❤️

ig we'll find out when the playlist gets updated

Football Field Scene

to my knowledge, we haven't got proof that they filmed there apart from that pic from Lisa (and are we sure this pic is from s3 filming?)

it would be AMAZING if they returned to this setting. ICONIC.

but idk how why they'd return here and how it would fit

it might not be a wilmon scene (could be simon + rosh + ayub, but i think theres a higher chance of it being a wilmon scene than the trio)

question- lisa said it was a wrap with a pic from the football field. which COULD mean that the last scene they filmed was there (tho it might not be the actual final scene) - was this where edmar couldn't stop crying?

💜WILMON ENDGAME?💜

they better or im going to riot

no but srsly, i dont think we'll go down a 'la la land' route. worst comes to worst, it'll be a positive open ending e.g. 'you were amazing. you'll be wonderful. we'll meet again with more freedom.' it'll be even better if there's a time skip here hahahha

like the end of ep5 gave me no hope cos idk how they're gonna get back together in one episode. but anything is possible.

arguably, the promo we've got since then leans towards endgame (?), but i dont think they'd reveal they're gonna be endgame if there wwen't gonna be more issues.

EXTRA

theres so much to cover in the final episode!! so i dont think everything will be acknowledged/addressed. things will be left ambiguous to keep the viewers thinking.

imagine if the break up at the end of ep5 wasnt that huge. that theyre still together (with tension) at the start of ep6, then they kidna ignore their disagreement. this culminates until the end, where they break up ( but very unlikely)

the future letters were there to show august's past. but could there be more to it? could we get a time skip? (again, unlikely imo. but would be sweet if done well)

a reference to the heart simon drew? maybe? probably not...

will simon give wille his orange jumper back? id love to see this on our screens but im sure we wont.

will sara's necklace make a comeback?

where does wille's 'what if I don't want to?' line come in? and the queen's line...

the shot of wille in the library (with that book in clear sight) hasn't yet appeared, right?

simon talking to sara by micke's house....hmmm. i would love a simon and micke interaction

volleyball scene + running into the lake happen as a connection to graduation?

wille with those sunglasses is a moment with felice?

do we hear anything more abt wille's birthday wish?

EXTRA .2

there are plenty of moments that happen that we don't see as viewers. so that jumper simon wears at the start of ep 2 looks like wille's. and if it is, then we didnt see the moment simon stole it wille gave it to him.

and when simon mentioned a mental health foundation, it implied that they may have had a discussion abt wille's anxiety before.

the piano scene in ep2 could have been a piano lesson that wille was giving simon, which probably means a lot more of these happened without us knowing

this makes me wonder how much wille knows about micke??

simon told august that sara's with her dad and all that- so does wille also know?

WHEN I FIRST WATCHED AND FINISHED S1 AND S2 OF YOUNG ROYALS, i knew wilmon would be together by the end of s3. like i was 100% convinced the show would end with them happy bcos that's what it had leaned towards the entire time. the vibe of it just screamed wilmon endgame to me.

i really hope past me was right, bcos the s3 promo really had me wondering. and then ep5 had me proper questioning. but netflix (and lisa) will have to pay for so much therapy if they arent endgame sooo🤷‍♀️

livelovelaugh wilmon ig

edit: ive just listened to omar's interview and now im qquuiiitteee sure redlight wont be in ep6🤷‍♀️

edit 2: will anyone else find out that it was august who posted the video?? will this prevent him from taking the throne??

[lonigiri]

eunseok nsfw alphabet

minors dni!

a=aftercare: he runs a bath for you, he knows he takes a lot out of you when you have sex so he makes sure to pamper you afterwards

b=body part: his favorite body part on himself are his hands. he loves his hands, more the hand prints that he leaves on your ass from how hard he slaps it. his favorite body part on you is your ass, he looovveess doggy so much because he can see the way your butt jiggles when his hips slap against it. loves leaving hand prints on your butt esp when he knows you'll be in a bikini the next day so the prints will be on display

c=cum: cums on ur ass and back and thighs, he isnt really a big fan of cumming inside of you honestly but he loves painting your skin with his cum

d=dirty secret: he LOVES when you pull his hair when hes eating you out, and just in general, he would never admit it bcs he knows you would make fun of him for sounding like a bottom

e=experience: hes pretty experienced, i wouldnt say his body count is through the roof but its not zero, he knows what he likes, and he also knows what you like and thats all the matters to him

f=favorite position: like i said before he loves doggy, or anything to do with ur ass being in the air, loves the way your ass jiggles

g=goofy: i wouldnt say hes "goofy" but i wouldnt say hes like serious either. but ig hes "serious" in this situation, hes not like cracking jokes or anything, ig you're the funny one bcs hes fucking you silly

h=hair: hes not like completely shaved down, but hes def trimmed, keeps the hair short bcs if ur sucking his dick he doesnt want his bush to get in your mouth he thinks its gross

i=intimacy: he is not super intimate, he will have intimate sex with you if its like your anniversary or something but its mostly rough

j=jack off: he doesnt masterbate like, ever, why should he if he has someone whos willing to do it for him whenever 😁

k=kink: impact play, loves slapping you around, slapping your ass, your face, your tits, and you love it as much as he does

l=location: hes not really a big fan of doing it anywhere besides the bedroom, but like if yall are watching a movie on the couch yall will do it there

m=motivation: he loves when you wear short skirts, or shorts, or anything that shows off your ass. he always tells you its only for him though, if you wear stuff like that around the guys he'll kill the guys for looking at you and then you for wearing it around them

n=no: doing anything with the other members, hes made it very clear that he would never include them in yalls sex life (not that you need it) he just thinks it should be between the two of you and no one else has to be involved

o=oral: goes both ways, he loves when you suck him off but he also loves eating you out, like he cannot choose which one he likes more

p=pace: fast and rough‼️ you can probably only count on one hand how many times you've had slow sex with eunseok

q=quickie: LOVEESSS quickies, since his schedule is so packed he can barely fit you in so when he can he makes the very most of it

r=risks: takes risks sometimes, not without asking you first ofc, he always says hes down to try anything once

s=stamina: he has so much stamina lord its crazy, he gets so hard so fast after cumming its crazy. he can probably go for 7 rounds without stopping 😭

t=toys: he doesnt really use toys, he doesnt think him or you will benefit from it

u=unfair: oh hes such a tease, he can do it forever without getting tired of it

v=volume: he doesnt really make sounds, he does talk dirty tho, calls you names like slut, whore etc,

w=wild card: when he first met you he thought you were the prettiest person ever, like genuinely he had never seen anyone like you before. he saw your pretty makeup, your eyelashes batting, and he knew he just wanted to ruin you, wanted to make your pretty makeup smear, have your long eyelashes wet with tears. and thats what he did, he had you screaming his name under him and that was just the first round.

x=xray: hes about 8" and hes pretty girthy, bro is not messing around with his cock 🥲

y=yearning: he doesnt think abt the act of having sex, he thinks about you in general more, just about how pretty you are, and then that gets him going

z=zzz: he doesnt fall asleep that quickly, he usually lets you fall asleep before him

-------------

please do not translate or steal my works! reblogs and likes always help!!

[soracities]

Oh this femininity convo is superb. I myself have recently started just being myself shamelessly, including wearing what i want without thinking will people like this or react badly or will people be disinterested in me etc I think it can be a big part of how we represent who we are to the world yknow 🤔 like i love long skirts and dresses to death (with pockets especially omg), i hate makeup (for mostly sensory reasons), i dont like shaving my pits even tho ive been told i should many times, i like boots and sneakers but also heels. I love cute delicate and feminine things but also functional and comfortable clothes. my outfits are kinda strange to look at i guess since they dont fit into any niche or aesthetic or even streotypical femininity but are rather an amalgamation of things i like that i think go nicely together and idk if i could even label it. Bc yeah i am a woman who likes feminine things but im a human being, and human beings are extremely complex and have several layers that dont fit into niches or aesthetics or boy girl categories (i also kind of hate aesthetics and how out of control its become everyone thinks they need to fit some aesthetic or category or group to be an acceptable person but yknow let's not even get into that rn bc lol thats a whole conversation by itself)

Point is we all care waaay too much what other people think and we try to fit ourselves into boxes to be acceptable and loved which is fair ig bc who doesnt want to be accepted at the end of the day, but putting on this show is so harmful to us and yet we still insist on the diets and the plastic surgery and shaming others or hating whats different. This isnt a new conversion its thousands of years old, yet we only seem to be going in circles :/

Oh anon I absolutely absolutely LOVE this for you, truly💕 I could not agree more and I think the one thing that really gets on my nerves about this whole thing is the way it is erasing all the multi-faceted dimensions that are inherent to being a human being in the first place--and that is such a deeply insidious and slippery slope to me.

I think the fact that this conversation is so old just shows how deeply important community and belonging is to us--and in a way I think it's a good thing that we are still having it because each and every time we get to improve a little; it means something, in my book at least, that even if we haven't fully succeeded in resolving it we are able, each time we talk about these things, to open a realm of possibility for someone, somewhere. And that's so important 🤍

[candy8448]

Watching oshi no ko s2

(Previous post)

Ep4

Whoa she traumatised him not cool 0.0

Is it just me or does the shadow thing look like aqua when he was a doctor in his past life? Im guessing that is deliberate. Probably because as a doctor it was his duty to keep ai safe

Anyways this episode was so good, aqua's emotions and panic were portrayed so well in such a haunting way :(

Ep5

WHOAKAY

Kana absolutely destroyed her D:

Bonding! :D

I love the animation in this episode! The colours! The way its so fluid and bouncy! The eyes! So good! I can also see a lot of kaguya sama vibes from aka akasaka whoch is so fun! Also while i was kinda meh about akane, im kinda starting to see more character traita from her that i like, i love how she is becoming more fleshed out.

Ep6

Not much to say about it other than than the MUSIC IS SO GOOD!! I loved it so much and it sounds sick playing loudly in my earphones, especially since its very different from the music in other episodes.

Im so glad that the website im watching from has the sub have background talking in a smaller font or else i would be so lost all the time =_= (also glad it translates everything important, and also in the colour of that text in the animation)

Melt went in a full on magical girl transformation 0.0

I liked the development tho, so cant wait for next episode

Ep7

Is... okay

I guess interesting to see the reasons behind the conflict between arima and akane but this episode wasn't that engaging. I cant wait for next episode though. I kind of really liked the focus on the other cast members tbh.

Ep8

Again it was fine ig but

Hehe

Ep9

WHOA this episode is good! Finally another episode that i like, i was worried since i was kind of bored with thw previous few!

Love the lil peep into when ai was still alive 😭

This is crazy how everything is depicted. (Seeing ai alive feels like one of those "A.I. vine continuations/au trend that my sister has been showing me on instagram, lol)

😭😭😭

(I wanna and probably will draw this)

Kana's pure look at aqua bridal carrying Akane XD

Also "im gonna go ho-" "im going with them" "im in" is hilarious XD

Well okay... 0.0

Im excited again :DDD

(Im kinda dissapointed by the ed. Its nice, and it sounds good, but it doesnt have the energy that makes the ending of each episode just pop. Mephisto made every ending of each episode just go so hard, and i feel like this season also kinda needs that feel, especially how the ed starts during the episode's last min. I get that ppl think it is "op is aqua pov" and "ed is ruby pov" and it does fit that theme, but it just doesmt go as hard as mephisto :/)

(Not me seeing the tumblr posts for this ep and the official art and just letting the most littlest squeals because there is family around but i physically cannot contain myself)

(Unrelated to this episode but i can feel how much the akane nation has grown with this season, this season writes he so well and makes her less unintresting like how she was to me at least in s1)(dont get me wrong, she was cool or whatever, she just failed to keep my intrest in her 0.0)

(Next post)

[tv-gh0st]

Rant about clothes

im back again with my silly timeline merge guys

am i designing zeldas yes very very slowly

that being said i red did Wilds design twice because the guy needed it and i am very glad witht he end result but i am going to over explain it because i simply can

Notes

"Doesnt work" his scared ear doesnt work

"from champions leather" all the darker leather armor and belts are from champions leather

"Tunic of the Wild" its the tunic of thr wild hes wearing

"Purah made it" purah made the prosthetic

"Bunny ears" there floppy like bunny ears!

"both sheika design" botht thr sleve on his amputated arm and under shirt are of sheika origin

"Still has sages" he still has the sages(thr braclet/rings) is nit there because i forgot to draw it

"Heart and stamina contanire" i thought it be cool if he actully had necklesses of them rant is underneath if you want to learn about my specific choices

reasons as to why Wild is now wearing green So first off youll notice he is infact not wearing the champions tunic when everyone else is wearing there main tunics

thats because age is wearing ig and I specifically do not want Wild wearing the champions tunic for not just that reason but hes not a knight anymore atlest in this au there is ni more princess or queen and no more Hyrulien army there sre no more champions which is also why i wsnt Age and Wild to be very distictly diffrent because there worlds and lifes are so different

now originally I still had Wild in blue

For one no part of it was my design yes all of them are in there own tunics from game or whatever but there slightly personalized and designed to my liking in this design the only thing that is mine is the design of the hood that is an exact copy of the zoras tunic and thr royal gaurds pants which i hated so much

so just do your own design of the zoras armor

but why the zoras armor

it was a random choice really maybe cas it was blue or maybe cas it was made by mipha but thats not like a ship im going for and ive already established i want age and wild to be as diffrent as possible so why did i do it

i have no fucking idea

but i do know another reason i hate it is a similar problem the designers had in making link originally its noted in the creating a champion book that they needed to keep him regatnixable as link, and zoras armor if your in the fandom sure but if your not then thats not link to you.

so its a big no go

the next design isnt even worth showing you

But i can talk about it

its when i finally used the tunic of the wild. Now why did i choose the tunic of the wild, its although not thr most popular armor still his green tunic, diffrent from age and very very very easy to play around with and differentiate from the other links. But also the meaning that the tunic has not only is it described as a tunic that diffrent adventurers wore it also proves the hard work he did that he deffited sll the fucking shrines he collected wll the koroks wnd just helps add to that wild i fucking did it sll nature hes supposed to have

But okay wtf was this 2nd design

i just added a bunch of diffrent aspects of different outfit peices ontop of the champions. Tunic, and i fucking hated it. I had the logic of oo i cant draw him in every single outfit so ill just put them all into one snd it was ugly also again no originality to it

so i settled on the one i showed you at the top

i still added refrences to the champions leather but i just though it looked better this way more simple

i did do a design of him in the champions lesther tho

Now im able to get away with it looking diffrent from age cas its cannon that zelda had to remake the tunic so it can be new and diffrent

I made ages simpler and more like the game cas i felt it fit better no spefic reason really

i also did not relize i used the same undershirt as in the champions leather cas i based it off of the orginal one

So yeah that is my silly reasoning as to why i redesigned wild 3 times and why he is now in green

[cielospeaks]

game stuff (compiled. and no its not positive lol)

-go:

bruh a real one step forward five million steps back moment fr. we had samurai remnant (fun and enjoyable crossover event. only downside is only now i find out robot mozart and yui have the same voice actor and i aquiesced to not rolling her bc she wouldnt come home and now i am full of regret. tho to be fair robot mozart happened long after the event lol), valentines (awesome new servant! andromeda is cute and i feel completely neutral but not negative on the take on her character! charon was cool too), and white day (usually i am so irritated at the cut ins but charly is so good natured and honest i cant be mad at him. he just feels like the good energetic boy coming in to check on you every morning. and cyrano is just so peak -pacha meme- the rest of the cast was wonderful too). but then. oh then. you had to just fucking do main story stuff. like yea sure some cringily fanservice power level edge thing with d antes and j alter is inevitable and whatever. but bring sal into it??????? only to not give him fucking anything????? and then permanently delete him, lobo, and any other half tolerable avenger (angra ig. or kuroe?) bc the edgey op fanservice characters need their wangst. ugh. the plot isnt even out but i imagine its something like- sal is typecast into himself and hates every second of it, moz bullies him bc its moz and the feeling is mutual, but evil marie takes advantage of it and him and the fandom reads it as cute. same w d antes or j alter and him. im so done w their reaction to the trio it makes me just disgusted. if the two of them treated him better id be more on board but they dont. just bc sal believes theyre on the same wavelength doesnt mean its some cute fluffy nonsense you can just slice of life. i think it cuts personal bc ive believed to be on the same wavelength of others and thats why im so fucked up today is bc of what happened there. and above all i dont want sal to have to go through that sort of suffering, esp on top of all his other suffering.

also if i had a nickel for every time a fictional somewhat m arie a ntoinette has ruined the life of my favorite dead composer character i would have two nickles which is weird that it happened twice.

speaking of which

-dv:

this is the positives girls. antonio traumerei!!!!!! love love love. oh my gosh. it looks beautiful and antonio is beautiful. traumerei is such a good fit for him, it reminds me of the schumann song which reminds me of jack and rikudou. good vibes infinite immaculate vibes.

ricky seems to not be dead. i am so hoping hes secretly a ghost. like imagine if hes in the like reconstructed research vessel and then at the end is like "lol im not exactly alive lol" like that poke mon episode. i would lose it. tho if hes like cursed or something it makes me think of that kingdom hearts scene which i also find really funny.

mystery maid: aztec treasure eh

ghost sail ricky: aye

but all memes aside i hope he exclusively talks to inference or violetta bc they are easily the characters i can stand the most of the confirmed cast. i will get so disappointed if its just rehashed main story plot, esp bc i really dont like their interactions there. and violeta is so cute in this pls let them interact.

[depressed-alone]

feels like, even tho im now labeling myself as aro, i dont think i fit in with the aro community very well. i dont think i'll ever fit in,, i dont think ppl would accept me as aro. i have a boyfriend, I'm in a romantic relationship, which like, i know whole point of being aro is, not really wanting that but i do want it. i love my boyfriend very much. is it romantic love? no, i dont really think so, i dont really know what romantic love is supposed to feel like but i dont think its what i experience. its,, some kinda love, some kind that i cant really put a name to. i want a relationship because i want to have a domestic life spent together with someone. because i want to love someone in a way thats different, and i wanna be loved in a way that's different. My boyfriend isnt aro, he loves me romantically, and i think its nice. thats his kind of love. mine,, mine isnt like that. i wish i had a word for it i really do but i dont know what kind of love this is. we do most of the normal relationship stuff that couples do but not always. sometimes stuff like a quick kiss can make me feel,, weird and unsure of what im feeling. just a quick peck on the lips makes me confused and queasy and kind of uncomfortable. but other times a quick kiss makes me happy and loved and all that. (idk if anyone will read this but before you worry me and my boyfriend already talked about this, its all sorted out its all good, he doesnt make me uncomfortable.) based on that i feel like most people would say that im not aro. but i cant,, i cant imagine having any other person in my life that i love in this specific way. and,, i dunno,, aro just feels,,, right but it feels very, lonely. i dont rly think i share experiences with the aro community, i dont rly think i belong here,, but i dont know where else to be. i spent so long crying and talking with aro people and thinking hard before i decided to label myself as aro. i want to be confident and happy when i tell someone im aro but i just feel scared because i dont really fit into the "norm" of aro ppl. i dunno. rambling over ig lol :')

[urthemiiel]

band name bestie and wild card for mercy, beginnings bandmates and tattoo for kian (hope it's not too much ddjdskjd)

THANK U!! it is not too much dont worry <3 but ill put it under the cut bc its long hehe

infamous mc ask game!!

mercy

Band name: How did they and the others come up with the band name? Has the name changed since it was founded?

- their band name is final girl, like the horror movie trope! mercy is a big fan of horror or gore or anything spooky. the name has been the same since the band was started, and it’s always been fitting since they are a punk band with a female lead and the aesthetics to match the ongoing horror theme!!

Besties: What’s their friendship with Rowan like? What are some things only he knows about them?

- she and rowan are super close!! he’s her best friend in the band. only he knows the full extent of her delusions LOL every day she texts him that she is fully convinced orion wants her bad and every day he says “u are literally insane ❤️”

Wild card: Tell us something about your MC! Feel free to really just roll us over with an emotional steamroller and crush the souls out of our bodies, if you’d like.

- shes super active on social media and has a decently large following even before botb. her fans love her for the drama… u better not piss her off bc she Will post call outs on her main ig 😭 during botb she absolutely heckles both soft violence and underground wastebasket and says mean things to their fans just bc she thinks it’s funny. besides being a troll she also posts a lot of selfies and thirst traps bc shes hot!!!!

kian

Beginnings: When and how did they know they wanted to be a professional musician? Was there a deciding factor?

- kian was a bored and lonely child and his parents felt enough guilt that they enrolled him in piano lessons so he could have Something to do(idk how canon this could be but its canon To Me). he was a natural, and he loved it. it was his introduction to his love for music and for a while he did think he’d pursue it as a career but ultimately decided it would be boring and his dream switched to being a famous rockstar instead. going to his first live shows, discovering misfit alley, and meeting seven/eventually starting the band in high school solidified that goal

Bandmates: How do they feel about the members of the band? Would they still be interested in stardom if they weren’t with that group?

- hes close to everyone in the band in his own ways. mostly rowan and devyn tho. rowan is a partner in crime, they have the most fun together and will always find a way to piss off orion. devyn is the rational one and kind of a calming presence. they got closer after the whole party/seven fiasco. if he didnt have the band i think he’d still pursue that kind of music, but probably as a solo singing type thing

Tattoo: Did they keep the tattoo with Seven’s initials? Why/why not? What was that decision/execution process like? (Bonus: What do they think of Seven keeping their tattoo?)

- he did keep the tattoo and he also doesnt conceal it on stage. so something about kian is that he is absolutely terrified of needles. hes never gotten piercings or any other tattoos, and the one tattoo he has for seven is a testament to how much he loves him bc it was a whole ordeal just to get it. so besides the fact that he is still horribly in love with sev, he also will not get it removed or covered bc he acts like sitting in the chair and being touched with the needle again is the same as being tortured to death. he says that he will get it removed once seven gets it removed, but the thought of seven removing his initials makes him ill 🤕 its like his last shred of hope that seven doesnt completely hate him

[another-dra-anew]

inori<3

everyones favorite seaweed surgeon!!

cw: (teen) homelessness

My identity hc for them

i honestly dont have much thoughts on her identity? i hc her as ace but thats abt it,, nothing confirmed or canon for her!!!! this section is so short im sorry my girl

Thoughts on their home life/family

girlie doesnt have one of those. uhhhhm.. i think she's very. lives day to day + doesn't think she'll ever have a life outside of work? so i dont think she's really thought about settling down and what she might want for the future. she doesnt know where she wants to live if she wants kids etc etc. she gets v upset if people try and ask her abt it, she doesn't enjoy talking about that.

How i feel about their canonical writing/handling

iiii like it! she's def a character who'll be improved by rewritten posts. but i think liiiike.... while she's maybe not full of all these twists and turns and who saw this coming! she's very... her writing is solid nonetheless? she's just a fifteen year old.

The one thing i’d want to make canon about them

kinda building off whats above. despite the fact she's so incredibly independent like... yall she's Just Young... shes literally a traumatized teenager and she acts like it! this is canon and it shows that this is how things are so this is maybe a cop out but. yeah. for a small little detail that wont really be relevant on canon. she's probably got like.. all those games u see mobile ads for (fishdom gardenscapes) etc like. maxed out she's played all the levels etc. she doesnt have any other hobbies

My number one favorite ship for them

yall sold me on kuronori....

…Now everyone else i ship with them

maki + tomori!!! the kuronorimakitomo polycule is REAL. also i like her with iranami!!!! and im gonna deviate from what i usually say a bit to say that i actually think she could be cute with taira.

The thing i will NEVER ship

shrugs. inori stay winning ig!! she's very shippable!

a dynamic/relationship i wish was explored more (in canon, or in fandom)

i still miss my edgy kids,, but, i dunno! inori + a parent figure ?... i think she should get to bully higa

thoughts on their design (appearance-wise)

hmmmmm... one of the less like. "cute" designs, but i like it! for how like... comfort over style it is (usually i aim for comfort + style, but style isnt even remotely part of her fit) im actually very fond of it. we arent gonna chat about inoris hair tho i kinda wanna change it hmmm

A music-related thought- a song that reminds me of them, or what their music taste is, etc

ya know. she has a playlist but going through it i dont think i want?? to say yes any of these songs are #her... i think inori listens to anything and everything, oddly enough! she'll listen to hyperpop she'll listen to country she'll listen to rock it doesnt matter to her. she likes noise which she can control <3