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#if you want to discuss anything with me just leave me an ask
tpwk-formula1 · 2 days
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Omg hi. I just found you and cheered. I have a order.
Lando Norris, Thick Crust, Red Sauce,
Cherry Tomatoes, Root beer, Mango Smoothie,
Aftercare
If you could maybe make it a dizzy, inconcent reader where people flirt with her and she dosnt now and flirts back and Lando thinks the only way for people to leave her alone would be if she pregnant with his child. And he definitely has feelings for her. 🤭
✨️THANK YOU ✨️
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Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu
thick crust sugar daddy red sauce rough sex cherry tomatoes "I can't wait to watch you swell with my babies" root beer daddy kink mango smoothie baby trapping dessert yes served by Lando Norris
Lando x Ditzy! reader
AN: Okay! So I am so sad that I had to close my requests early but in a week I got over 100 requests which is fucking amazing and I am so happy for them but I want to make sure requests are coming out in a timely manner so I will be completely all requests within the next few weeks and once the Pizzeria is back open it will be a rebrand... So if you have any prompt ideas, kinks, or overall things you want to see get added to the menu just send me a message and I'll see what I can do!
TW breeding kink, baby trapping, pregnancy, dirty talk, rough sex, creampie, jealous Lando
WC 1200+
Y/N POV
"Danny! You can't just say things like that," I laugh loudly with the Australian in front of me. I can feel my cheeks growing red from the sexual joke Daniel just cracked.
I can feel a hand on my lower back making me look over my shoulder to find Lando making my smile grow more before I lean up and place a kiss on his cheek.
"What are you two up to?" Lando questions with a slight edge in his voice.
"Was just telling, Y/N about my summer break," Daniel says with a smile. I watch as Lando's face grows in a smile before he's ushering us towards the bar.
"Don't wander to far," Lando tells me making me look up and smile.
"Okay, babe!" I say when I place a kiss on his cheek.
"Are you okay?" I ask Lando softly making him nod his head before flagging the bartender down and ordering both of us drinks.
As time passed I found myself talking with Charles and Ollie.
"Charles! You'll have to invite me over sometime!" I tell Charles as he finishes telling me how he finally got Leo to stop peeing in the kitchen.
"Hey, sorry to interrupt but I'm just gonna steal her away. We have early morning plans so I gotta get this one off to bed," Lando says randomly interrupting making me raise a brow before trying to speak.
"Say bye," Lando tells me before I can even say anything.
I just turn back towards the two men waving a good bye before following Lando out of the club.
"I literally told you not to wander off," Lando snapped when we finally hopped into our Uber.
"Lando, I could see you the whole time," I reply back softly not understanding why he was so mad.
"Could you? Cause there was a solid 5 minutes where I was wandering around to find you," Lando tells me roughly making me huff and turn my back on him to look out the window.
Lando and I sat in silence for the rest of the car ride when we finally pulled up to his apartment building instantly making me get out and march to the front doors not waiting for Lando.
When we get into his apartment I lock myself in his bathroom still not wanting to talk to him, but eventually I had to face him and when I walked out of the bathroom I was changed into a silky sleep dress while Lando was sitting in bed in his boxers.
"I don't wanna see you entertaining men anymore. You're mine," Lando says not even looking up from his phone.
"Last time I checked, you were the one who was adamant we were nothing more than sex and money," I reply back while climbing into the bed next to Lando.
"Do you see the way you walked into my home like it was yours? How you climb into MY bed like it was yours? The way you have half my closet full of your stuff? That's all because you're mine, whether it has been a discussion or not, you have come into my life and fucked up any prior deal, so fucking sue me if I set a boundary with you," Lando finally snaps back making me look around his room realizing that over the year of us hooking up for money I had basically moved in. I had made his home our home and I didn't even realize.
"Lando, I think we should have this discussion when we are both fully sober," I tell him softly. I knew what I wanted sober or drunk I wanted Lando to be mine but was this just some drunk game Lando was playing.
"No, I'm barely fucking tipsy., I didn't even realize you didn't realize you were mine. I thought it was unspoken," Lando tells me softly before turning towards me and placing a soft kiss on my lips.
"Do you know how many men want to fuck you?" Lando questioned with a raised brow making me laugh slightly.
"Lando, you're the only man who wants to fuck me," I reply back with a roll of the eye.
"You're mine," Lando said moving topics again and pulling me in for a heated make-out session.
I quickly climb into Lando's lap and grind my bare pussy against his briefs making his groan slightly.
"I'm gonna put a baby in you," Lando tells me softly making me sit up and stare at him in complete shock.
"The fuck are you on about now?" I ask Lando before he pulls me back into for a kiss where he flips us over so I am now under Lando letting him grind into me backing me whimper.
"You're mine and when you walk around that fucking paddock in 6 months everyone will fucking know you're mine," Lando said while trailing kisses down my neck making it clear he was marking his territory.
"You're insane," I whisper back but it quickly turns into a moan because Lando is leaning down and taking a soft lick out of my clit.
"Daddy," I moan when Lando starts sucking on my clit while lightly teasing my soaked hole with his fingers.
"Oh fuck," I scream out when Lando slips 2 fingers in and finds my G-spot.
"I want you to cum on my fingers," Lando says while speeding his actions making me feel the band in m stomach start to grow tight letting me know I was close to cumming for Lando.
"Daddy," I scream out when the band finally snaps and I'm cumming all over Lando's fingers. Lando helped ride my orgasm out before he's pulling his briefs down and roughly shoving his cock deep into my pussy.
"Oh! Daddy," I gasp still not fully recovered from my previous orgasm and can already feel a second one building up.
"Fucking hell, so damn needy already gonna cum for me," Lando said with a smirk while bringing his hand down to my clit and giving it a rough rub bringing me closer to the edge.
"Daddy," I whine when I feel myself reach the point of no return, cumming all over Lando's cock with a shout. I was shaking and so long in my own pleasure, I don't feel Lando's hips shutter as he fills my pussy full of his cum.
"I can't wait to watch you swell with my babies," Lando groans with a smirk while slowly pulling out of me.
"Lando, I probably didn't get pregnant from one time," I tell him softly with a laugh falling from my lips.
"I'll fuck you until you do," Lando says with a shrug. That night we fell asleep tangled in each other's arms.
6 weeks later
"Fucking hell," I gasp while staring down at the positive pregnancy test.
"I told you, you were gonna have my babies," Lando said with a proud smirk.
"Lando, what the fuck are we gonna do?" I ask starting to panic.
"Hey, calm down! It's all gonna work itself out," Lando tells me softly while pulling me into his chest.
"I can't wait to see everyone's face when you show up to the paddock supporting a bump caused by me baby," Lando tells me making me laugh lightly.
I knew we would figure everything out. It wasn't how I pictured myself getting pregnant but boy am I happy it's how it happened.
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kiddiesmores · 3 days
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𝐂𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞 𝐓𝐞𝐝𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞: 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐥
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𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐦𝐢𝐤𝐞: bello! this is the prequel to the college ted smut fic LOLL, this is gonna be a cute little series. more headaconish if anything, everyone say thank you @michibap !! this series is less edited, and i’ll talk abt them as i please, but if you ask for more i’ll probably tell u more abt them so, you never know. ok enjoy!
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: smutty towards the end.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.2k
and as always!! dividers by @cafekitsune
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Ted was the RA of your hallway yalls freshman year
At your first meeting you kinda sat in the chair with your roommate next to you a little geeked out
Those stupid glasses and collared shirt had a grip on you it really did
But outside of the occasional room check (which he literally does nothing but stand and look side to side before leaving) you don’t see him much
However on your walk home from your friend's dorm across campus, your roommate gave you a heads up that she’s having a person over, and if you could stall an extra 30 minutes or so that would be great.
Whatever, you’ll hang out in the common area
That was at 9pm. It’s 11.
And you’ve blown this girls phone up and fucking nothing, and it’s not like you’re not LITERALLY RIGHT OUTSIDE THE ROOM so you know whoever it is hasn’t left yet.
And you’ll be damned if you sleep in room with your roommate and her victim of the week.
So you decide to suck it up and text your friends who’s dorm you were just at and asking if you could sleep on the floor tonight and just bitch at her tomorrow
“You locked out?”
Your angel, saving grace, Ted Nivison
“Nah just um, trying to be a good roommate.” you joke, pointing at the pink scrunchy on the doorknob that your roommate used to signal she has someone of “importance” over
He laughs a bit to himself, “Well, I can keep you company, or better yet kick whoever it is out, yk, can’t have opposite sex over past 10pm and all”
You sigh, “I don’t even know if it’s a man in there or not so, we can hold off on that one”
He sets up next to you on the common area couch, “Then I guess I'm keeping you company.”
Your brow raises, “Don’t you have any RA duties to finish, like i dunno, loud sex complaints or people smoking out their shoe box?”
And he laughs again, you got this man giggling, you’re so in
“I’m off duty now, finished my last walk around so, you want me here or not?”
You pretend to think for a moment, “Yeah, you wanna see pics from my cadaver internship?”
“Forgot I'm on the floor with the freaks.”
From that point on you two were in contact with each other
Walking back from class and checking his door to see if the wheel on his door said he was inside or not before knocking
Always thinking it’s another resident but it’s just you with a bag of chick fil a from the student center and a stupid smile while sweat drips from your forehead
The two of you sitting in his floor sharing fries and discussing class and the drama from your opposing friend groups
Finding out he’s a theater and film kid from all the playbills and movie posters scattered across his single bedroom
Complaining about how it’s been months and you get no play and have to just suffer and live through your roommate
And he’s just eyeing you like 🌝
So yall start hooking up! for the plot
He was kinda waiting for you to just lean over and just start kissing him but a win is a win
Eventually you’d be sleeping over all the time and one night yall are watching a movie on his laptop
And he has an arm around you and just looks down at you like “Are we like?? Dating??” Cause atp it’s been going on for months
And you shrug and you’re like “We can be”
And he’s giddy but tries to stay cool about it
But the cuteness aggression gets to him and he just starts hugging you tight as fuck and rolling around violently and you’re like “bro chill” but you like it so it’s whatever
Fast forward to sophomore year and yall are out of the dorms thank fucking god
Yall end up living in the apartments close to campus where all of your older friends used to stay
But the real issue is debating if you’d wanna live TOGETHER or not
You decided against it because the thought of living with a man is driving you crazy, you get enough testosterone when you see him and schlatt together you don’t need that evil energy near you at all times
Speaking of Schlatt, that dumb ass sigma chi president
When you first met it was when Ted drug you to one of the parties they threw, something about getting the “full college experience” or something who knows
Schlatt approaches you both and he kinda looks at you funny?? So you look at him funny?? But you know that look, you’ve seen it from the girls and twinks in the Fine Arts building whenever you go in and sit with Ted before class starts
He wants your guy and now you’re on guard
You end up going shot for shot with him at the next party to assert your dominance over him but you both just end up drunk and shoeless down the road eating half frozen burritos he took from the house fridge
Ted notices you both are missing and tracks your location and drives to find you both sitting on a curb leaned against eachother
“How the fuck did you guys get here?? And what the fuck are you eating??”
“Rito..” you mumble, mouth full of tortilla and you even hand it to him as a peace offering
He sighs and takes a bite before lifting you up and throwing you over his shoulder with a “hff” from you, and looking down to see Schlatt falling over since you were his ledge
“Get up man, you’re embarrassing the hoes” and Schlatts at full attention and stumbling to the car
So yall fucked with eachother after that, hangover the next morning went CRAAZY and yall sent each other snaps back and forth showing how fucked you both looked
When yall decided to get the apartments, schlatt was there, in Ted’s ear about how Tucker and Charlie would be happy to live with them if you didn’t want to
And you look at him like ???? cause since when was he moving into the apartments
“If I stay another year in that house and see those pledges everyday and hear them try to butter me up, I might burn the house down.”
“Type shit”
Even at separate houses Ted still loves to be in yours.
Sleepover? Yeah if it’s in your bed. Wanna fuck? Yeah but only in your bed.
Girl house energy is so much better than chuckle house.
You’ll wake up to him tucked into your side or laid on top of you, face in your neck and snoring softly.
No shirt on, hands on your hips and sleepy mumbling in your ear, you don’t even mind how hot his body temp is because he looks so precious on top of you.
Loves when you rub on his back and whisper his name to wake him up, slowly waking up and squinting at his lack of vision and because of how tired he is before smiling softly when he sees you.
Yall are so codependent it’s sickening.
Loves touching you, like LOVES IT. CRAVES IT.
When you’re out together he will have his hand on yours or hand on your waist or hip.
Hanging out with friends? He needs to be sitting next to you, thighs touching or head resting on top of yours, hands interlocked and kissing your fingers while staring at you softly while you speak.
Mornings after sleepovers he’s stood behind you while you cook or move about in the kitchen, hands around your waist and leaning against you while trying to force himself awake.
“You’re gonna make me trip if you don’t move Ted.” “Buh.”
Off chance you’re at his place, it’s never just you and him time. It’s you, Ted and Schlatt time.
You’re cuddling? Schlatt is sitting at the bottom of the bed or in the office chair at the desk on his phone. You wanna smoke? Schlatt is sat between you both as a footrest for you and someone to lean on for Ted.
Yall have a group chat called “Bottoms n Schlatt”
He always oddly fits in with you two.
You learn that he and Ted had a weird aura when they first met. Not knowing if they were just close friends or wanted each other but inevitably never doing anything about it.
And you only found out when one drunken night at a party you found your boyfriend and schlatt talking oddly close to each other in a corner, giggling and poking at each other while Schlatts hand tightly gripped your boyfriends hip to stop him from running from his playful gnawing.
But you weren’t upset at all! In all honesty it was hot! And it’s not like you and schlatt haven’t fooled around before.
That drunken night as yall sat on the curb was only the beginning.
It’s where he admitted his distaste for you because he thought you were stealing his bestfriend. And how he found you both so attractive it made him mad.
To which you replied, “Type shit” and let him kiss you, only stopping when he pulled back and grumbled about having to throw up, making you go “eugh” and rub his back as he did so.
You told Ted the next morning, a bit guilty as you guys had JUST started dating but he wasn’t phased at all.
“Did you like it?”
“Huh?” you mutter, still twiddling with your fingers anxiously. He smiled sweetly, slowly sliding his hand over to yours to interlock them, leaning in closer. “Did you like kissing him?”
You think for a second, dumbly blinking with slightly widened eyes. “I mean, for the 10 seconds before he had to hunch over I did..” “Eugh..” “I had the same reaction.”
He laughs and kisses your cheek, squeezing your hand before murmuring a low, “M’not mad, I think this is definitely a conversation for all three of us to have though.” To which you nod and softly kiss his lips.
To this day that conversation never happened. You all kinda just hit on each other whenever you were all together.
At a party and talking to Ted while stood next to Schlatt but Schlatt’s hand is on your hip as he sips his drink, and both their eyes are locked on you.
How you and Ted cuddled in an empty room while everyone else went crazy down stairs suddenly shifted to Schlatt sitting in the room with you guys quietly but then turned into all three of you sandwiched together, drunkingly giggling and whispering to eachother.
How you caught them making out in a dark corner and only whined because you wanted to be included.
To which they took turns kissing you while being passed around in their arms.
Multiple pictures in the digicam of you three, the taller two holding you up while you pout or the three of you teasingly sticking your tongues out at each other while the tips touch.
But your personal favorite, was the one of them both between your legs, smiling goofily with glistening lips and dazed eyes, Ted's glasses crooked.
It started off playful, you laid back in Schlatt’s arms and play fighting with ted, small kicks and giggly grunts as you tried to keep him away from you, only for Schlatt to end up holding you down while Ted tickles you.
Once the tickling stopped he’d lean up to kiss you, still between Schlatts legs as you kiss him back, letting his tongue slip into your mouth. You let out soft moans, starting to forget that you’re both quite literally between schlatts legs until he lets out a low huff, making you pull back with a trail of spit between your lips to look up at him.
“Well don’t let me stop you.”
Ted’s face ends up buried between your legs with Schlatt’s hands under your sweatshirt toying with your tits and locking you in a hot sloppy kiss, grunting into your mouth when you moan out for Ted.
Pinches your nipples and it makes your back arch, causing Ted to groan and rub his nose against your clit as he eats you out.
Schlatt marks up your neck, huffing in frustration because he needs MORE
Does a weird shuffle to move from under you, confusing you a bit because where are you going??
Regardless he manages to get from under you and lays you against the headboard, walking around to the end of the bed to join Ted between your legs.
Pushes his face over with his hand like “Move over.” “Guh”
Your eyes kinda widen because what are they gonna-oh wow.
TWO MOUTHS???
THEY’RE ALTERNATING
This is a planned attack, has to be.
Regardless you enjoy it, two mouths lapping at your cunt, two mouths to clean up the mess. Efficient!
In your haze you notice the digicam on the bed stand, shakily reaching over to grab it with a wicked smile.
The two of them are rutting against the bed and cleaning you up, Ted whimpering and Schlatts low groaning giving you a good contrast of the two.
“Say cheese boys!” you tease with a playful cunning smile, causing them both to look up and press a cheek to either of your thighs.
Both looking just as pitiful as the other, only difference is Ted’s glasses are all fucked up and he’s way redder than Schlatt is. But they enjoyed it an equal amount!
So yeah y'all are all kinda locked in after that.
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heeseung64 · 3 days
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hear me out... basketball captain heeseung trying to impress cheerleader captain reader >_<
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WHAT, LIKE ITS HARD?
when basketball captain heeseung finds it hard to get the attention of the sought after leader of the cheer squad, he manages to finally have an interaction with her.
SHORT ONE SHOT! BASKETBALL PLAYER HEESEUNG X CHEERLEADER LEADER Y/N
FLIRTING, CASUAL TALK [not proofread]
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Heeseung likes to make it a tradition every game, setting a trap for you to talk to him every time the game ends. Whether it was a loss or not- it felt like he always won when he makes the cheersquad stay for a final talk, discussing the next games and the new approach to the next seasons.
Every game, he'd make you stay on the court just for a couple of minutes just to hear you complain and interact with him. His way of figuring a way to impress you was to be a "responsible and strong" leader, likewise to you. So of course he'd make you talk to him 'leader to leader', but lately, the meetings are so unnecessary you start to find him annoying- but for him? anything for you to say anything back.
Eventually, you made it so clear that you were tired of his excuses, making the team leave early so it was just you to confront him.
The court was empty and the only sound was the squeaking of Heeseung's shoes, his breath panting along as he swishes the ball into the basket- perfectly every time.
"I don't get why you want us to stay for a meeting, number 11." You say as you release your tight ponytail, glaring at the sweat that beaded off of the player's face.
"It's Captain Heeseung to you, pretty." He breathes, catching the ball before turning to you.
Heeseung couldn't help but smile at your aggression, but he quickly wipes it off, clearing his throat before turning away to shoot again.
"I just find it better when the girls listen in, makes us work as a team, y'know, since we have you as our moral support with your wonderful routine." Heeseung's voice echoes through the space as he dribbles the ball.
"I get that," You croak, walking further up to him as you watch him score. "But you only ask me questions? You realise theres more than just me to the team?" You start to get pettily angry, "And the only questions you ask me, is if you did well?" You stammer, watching him falter his steps towards you.
"Well," Heeseung turns, smirking as he catches the ball under his arm. "Did I do well?"
You find the proximity close, with the faint smell of his perfume still latching on to his skin, and his breath enough to tickle yours.
"You're asking me like you find it hard to play good, number 11." You talk back, earning a scoff from him. "As if cheering for me is harder, but by all means, you can continue to cheer for me as hard as you want. After all, I only see you looking for me." Heeseung stands before you, looking you down with a sly smirk on his face.
"How about we put this on a poll?" You chuckle, pushing his sly demeanour aside, snatching the ball off of him. Heeseung watches you in your changed clothes, comfy and determined as you dribble the ball in ease. Heeseung couldn't help but smile at the sound of your determination, and your footsteps along the court floor.
"If I shoot and score, no more meetings." You yell from the 3-pointer line, to which Heeseung rolls his eyes.
"You can't shoot that far,or wide! for a pretty girl like you it's too-"
swish!
Your laugh escapes your grin, with your hand still in the shooting position as you watch the captain's mouth agape. "What? Like it's hard?" you giggle, making heeseung's cheeks heat.
He finds your presence so alluring, and the way you smiled back at him melted his confidence, like all his built up moments to talk to you had lost itself- and now he remains clueless before you shove the ball into his chest.
"I'll give you a simple one, just in case it's too hard, Captain Heeseung." You catch his attention with his name out of your lips. You look at his eyes one more time before turning away.
"If you get it in, I'll cheer twice as hard for you for tomorrow's game, m'kay?"
You watch his eyes dart to the ball, swiftly taking it before launching it with his arms at the half court line, before it lands into the net, swishing perfectly from the momentum. You couldn't help but hide the fact that you were really impressed, wondering that maybe if you drove this much motivation in him, there would have been more games won.
"What?" He smirks, tugging your arm closer to him. You feel his grip differ from last time: confident, and cocky. He shows you a winning smile before turning around, "Like it's hard?" He mocks you, picking up your sports bag and his as takes you all the way out.
Needless to say he was determined to win that very next day afterschool. It was almost overtime, with both home and away one-upping each other, Heeseung called for a timeout, to which was peculiar of him- especially when its almost the end of the game.
Instead of anything technical, he runs to your aisle where you're cheering as loud as you can be, breathing heavily from the routine you choreographed. "Hey, pretty." Heeseung calls you.
"It's Captain Y/n to you." You reply, slightly worried as to why he completely ran only to you with his teammates waiting on him.
"If I make this shot and win, I'll take you out? for other important matters, leader to leader?" His brows furrow, waiting on a deal before he turns away.
You roll your eyes, chuckling before giving him a nod, to which he breaks a smirk before finishing the game with a half court shot- just as perfect as the one he through for you yesterday.
As the crowd cheers, the teams die down and Heeseung manages to pry away from his duties from the court, making his way towards you- his eyes never leaving yours.
"Captain Y/n, did I do well?" He asks again, before you break a smile. "I'll tell you how well you did over dinner, Captain Heeseung." You reply back, the girls with you cooing as he sends you a wink.
"I'll see you tonight then, pretty girl."
Was all heeseung could muster before dancing on his way home, happy that his plan eventually mustered up to be the greatest.
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a/n: i hope it was an ok read 🙏🙏 i honeslty really enjoyed writing this so thank u anon 🥺💗💗 pls req more!!
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daydreamerwoah · 2 days
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Family Tree (Chapter 4)
tw: awkwardness; drinking
Simon x Y/n <3
When you walked back toward the booth, you could see three additional bodies sitting with Ella. Taking a deep breath, you prepared yourself to put on a face to meet her boyfriend and his friends. God, why didn't you just leave when you had the chance? Maybe you could sneak back to the bathroom so you could have more time to calm your nerves. You cursed yourself for not bringing your bag; maybe then you could have just left the place entirely and told Ella you had to leave when you saw her the next day at work. 
But no. You didn't have the chance to think of a grand escape plan. 
Ella's eyes found yours and an excited grin found its way on her lips, making the guy sitting beside her glance your way.
Shit. 
"Guys," she said as you made it to the table, "this is Y/n." she gestured to the three men sitting there.
Your eyes first landed on the brown-skinned man who was next to her. "Kyle," he introduced himself, sticking his hand out to shake yours. "This is my fella," your friend sweetly said before kissing his cheek playfully. Somehow, seeing them next to each other, you could instantly tell how they fit perfectly for one another. 
"Steamin' Christ," the guy sitting across from Kyle said, catching your attention "These two," he playfully rolled his eyes, "Name's John, but you can call me Johnny lass," he joked, making the couple laugh. 
"He's just jealous his bird is deployed right now," Kyle shot back. 
You wanted to ask what the hell bird meant, but from how you were just talking about Ella and Kyle, you thought it had something to do with a girl he was with. At least you hope that's what it was.
Johnny scoffed, "Yeah whatever."
"Scoot," Ella told Kyle, making room for you to sit next to her in the booth. You smiled before squeezing your way in, "And this-" she said, making your eyes look at the body that was now sitting across from you, "- is Simon."
Your heart dropped five flights of stairs down to your stomach the moment you saw the man. The dark brown eyes, the black surgical mask, the hood that covered the rest of his head. It was the guy you'd seen in the cafe twice; the guy you hastily backed up into, and fuck did you want to hide under the table. Your eyes widened, and you gulped, embarrassingly obvious. Ella subtly glanced at Johnny and Kyle, who both had a curious look in their eyes but remained quiet. It was amazing how the three of them had come to the same conclusion that you had to have known him somehow.
"Uh hi," you said, trying to sound more confident than you felt, "Nice to meet you guys," you glanced around the table. 
A waitress brought each one of them drinks, giving a thankful distraction to the table as she set down the glasses. But it wasn't a good enough distraction for Simon Riley. The moment you walked back to the table and he glanced at you, his eyes narrowed slightly. From the side of your face, he thought you looked familiar but couldn't place where he'd seen you before. It wasn't like he remembered a lot of things when it came to his civilian life - especially people - but it was something about you that screamed I've seen you. It wasn't until you sat down across from him that he was indeed correct; he had seen you before... in the cafe. And by the look on your face, you had remembered him too. The slight furrow of his eyebrows was slightly covered by the hood, but you saw it. 
You wanted to believe that he wouldn't recognize you. I mean, he probably saw a lot of people during the day like you did. Surely some girl who bumped into him weeks ago would spark anything for him to think about that moment... would it?
Wrong.
You tried your best to keep your focus on everything else going on at the table; Kyle and Johnny discussing a little bit about their last mission - the pieces that weren't confidential; each time one of them raised their glass to take a sip of their drink; anything.
While Ella asked Kyle and Johnny about what all happened earlier in the day, Simon's eyes subtly remained on you. Maybe this time you'd catch him staring, and then you'd feel slightly better about catching him. But he was quick... each time you found yourself glancing his way, his eyes would already be on the couple. He was a soldier, after all. Everything he did was silent and quick… Except for his intimate moments, but that rarely was shown to anyone. Even the one night stands he had, they had never even seen his face before, so there was no way they'd see anything more.
But hell, this was awkward as fuck. So awkward you found your leg slightly bouncing under the table. 
"So lass," Johnny said as he took a sip of his drink, "America?" You slightly raised your eyebrow at his quick conclusion, making him smirk, "The accent." 
Oh.
You nodded, quickly looking at Simon before going back to Johnny, "Yeah."
I mean, it was hella obvious that you weren't from anywhere except across the pond. 
"What made you move here?" Kyle chimed in. 
A beat went by before, "Family," your short answer came out. But Ella, already proving herself the best bestie there was, switched topics immediately.
"I was thinking about cooking a big dinner on Friday. You all should come over yeah?"
Bless her heart. You didn't even know if she really was going to cook or not, but it definitely got their attention changed to food and how good Ella's cooking was. You slightly lowered your head, thankful for the change in topics, but this didn't go unnoticed by the quiet man sitting across from you. He was no stranger to avoiding anything that remotely talked about family, considering he didn't like to talk about his either. But he didn't like the feeling that crossed his mind about why you didn't like to talk about yours. Were they back in the States? Were you close to them? Were they dead? All those questions ran through his mind as he looked at you for a moment. 
Feeling his gaze, you briefly glanced up meeting his eyes, before cutting them away to pay attention to Ella talk about everything she was going to cook. 
"Oh you should join us," she said, looking at you. 
And risk running into the man - erm, Simon - again? 
"I can't... have to take care of some things," you declined, once again coming up with an excuse.
Well, it wasn't an excuse. You did have something to do. Continue fixing up the damn townhome. 
Her famous pout formed on her lips, making you give her a sad smile. If she convinced you to do anything else today, your head was going to spin. 
"Fine," she playfully rolled her eyes, "But one day you have to. Deal?" You nodded. She glanced down at your empty glass from earlier, "Want another bourbon?" she asked, making the table go silent for like... three seconds. Although it felt like an eternity.
"Y'drink bourbon?" Johnny asked, with a look on his face that was unknown to you, it made you slightly blush sheepishly. But Ella and Kyle, that look made their lips turn upward before simultaneously glancing at Simon. He, however, felt his eyebrow raise at hearing her ask you that question. Another thing that made him curious about you. 
You nodded, "Yeah," you answered him before looking at Ella once more, "But no. Think I'm gonna head out."
She groaned before a thought popped in her head, "Wait. Come to the restroom with me," she pleaded and all but gently shoved you out of the booth before grabbing your wrist and dragging you to the restroom. You didn't even have time to protest before you were walking behind her toward the back of the pub. The moment the two of you stepped inside the restroom, she faced you with a big, toothy grin, "Alright spill. How do you know Ghost?"
Your eyebrows drew closer together, "Ghost?"
Rolling her eyes, "Simon. We call him Ghost cause that's what he usually goes by - his callsign. But whatever. How do you know him?" she smiled. 
"I don't know him."
"Bollocks. When you looked at him, your eyes got so big I thought they were gonna pop out ya head," she teased. 
You wanted to laugh, but the fact that she saw the way you looked at him made you freeze a little. You weren't that obvious were you? You had two choices: brush her and the topic off like it never even happened, or tell her. The thought that she'd bug the shit out of you forever if you didn't say anything made you cringe a little. You glanced around the restroom, feeling silly about why you even felt awkward about the guy.
"I just-it's a cafe I went to a few weeks ago. I was in a hurry to get to work and accidentally bumped into him after I ordered my latte. It was embarrassing, to say the least," you said, remembering that day vividly for some reason, "And then I saw him again the other day. I wasn't-wasn't staring or anything, but he caught me looking at him. Talk about being a weirdo. Just didn't think I'd see him again," you finished, somehow zoning out a little at the memory of how you embarrassed yourself in front of a man what was now three times. 
And god was Ella beaming inside.
The same thing could be said for Johnny and Kyle back at the table. 
"Seems like she likes ya L.T.," Johnny teased, nudging Simon's shoulder, making the large man huff, "She likes bourbon too."
Kyle chuckled, taking a sip of his drink, "You've seen her before?" 
Simon was a man who never talked about his personal life, not even to his teammates. What little they knew about him was snippets of his past and that he enjoyed a good Kentucky bourbon any day of the week. There were bits of pieces that he sometimes indulged them in, but for the most part, what he did when he wasn't at work was any of their guesses. So knowing that you had seen a girl - Ella's coworker at that - intrigued them like small boys learning about something their big brother was doing. 
"Wouldn't ya like to know," he responded, the cockiness of his personality coming a bit. 
Although he was quiet - ghostly quiet - Simon was playfully cocky, and every now and again, his friends would catch a moment. This made the two other men chuckle, teasing him more about where he probably met you.
After a minute or two, you and Ella had made it back to the table, her taking a seat next to her boyfriend again while you grabbed your bag. 
"It was nice meeting you guys," you said, bidding farewell to them. Before you left, Ella made you - more like demanded with a laugh - that you put your number in her phone. You couldn't help but slightly grin as you did. Handing it back to her, you took one last look at the three men sitting in the booth as well, eyes lingering a bit longer on Simon. He didn't even hide that he was looking at you too. It made your stomach flip at the silent interaction. "Bye," you said before leaving the pub. 
If you were lucky, you probably wouldn't have to see him again and further embarrass yourself. 
I feel like this wasn't awkward enough but I was having a hard time putting thoughts into the writing lol!! I might rewrite this What yall think?
Taglist: @simp-4-masked-men @dayrin085 @jessicab1991 @kylies-love-letter @kalypsoox @brownlee-22 @firefoxkairan
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gothamhappiness · 18 hours
Text
Being in a relationship with Bruce Wayne: a journey - Hi, Jason (Part V)
It's a big series about an afab!reader who doesn't like Bruce Wayne and who still falls in love with him (he fells quicker and harder)
Reader's origin story // Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4
Warnings: no proof reading, Jason's relationships with Bruce and Dick are discussed, mentions of Joker, violence, death
You met with Dick again in a bookstore. At first, you thought that it was quite a strange coincidence, until you saw him trying to talk with a very big boy who didn’t seem very interested in talking with him. Dick appeared upset ; the other boy was just shrugging and trying to focus on the books in front of him. 
You hesitated to go to them; you didn’t want to intrude. You weren’t too sure to recognise the other boy, but his face somehow seemed familiar. What decided you was where they were standing: the classic literature aisle of the store. Which was what you were looking for when you entered the shop.
You thought you could just say hi and then leave them alone if your presence was annoying them. You carefully walked to them.
“Hey Dick” you greeted the boy who turned around and instantly smiled at you. 
You weren’t too sure if it was a real smile yet, so you didn’t come closer to him, but his answer showed he was actually glad to see you.
“Hey, Y/N! What are you doing here?” he asked
“Buying books I guess.” you teased “I was looking for Mansfield Park or Emma, now I finished Pride and Prejudice” you said. 
The big boy to whom Dick was trying to talk to, quickly turned around and looked you up and down. He watched you with curiosity sparkling in his green eyes. Dick took his chance before his brother could go back to the cover of the book he was holding.
“Y/N, this is Jason, my little brother. You seem to share the same taste in books” Dick introduced the two of them
“Hi, Jason” you smiled as you cautiously observed him, remembering who he was now you knew his name.
You remembered what you read about Bruce and his son “who came back from the dead” and all the headlines about “Bruce arguing with his adoptive son”. It had quite broken your heart at the time.
“You’re Bruce’s new girlfriend?” he asked you quite bluntly
“I hate titles and I hate to feel like a possession. But yes, I'm currently seeing Bruce.” you replied and Jason nodded “I’m surprised you heard about me.” you added. 
“Didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. It's just that things are rocky with Bruce.” Jason said and you reassuringly smiled at him “And yeah, everyone is talking about you in the “family”. Dick and Tim said you were nice.” Jason explained his first coldness to you
“I understand; Bruce isn’t always easy and you don’t know me” you nodded
“Ah yeah?” Jason arched an eyebrow at you. 
He had expected you to take Bruce’s defence, like everyone else.
“Let’s say that I like challenges.” you smiled “And I’m not Bruce’s lawyer” you joked
“You should thank god for that, or you would have a lot of work” Jason grinned and you could tell Dick was quite happy about the current interaction.
“Can I buy the two of you a drink or something? Or a meal” you asked. “There is this sweet little café right outside the bookstore” you offered
You actually wanted to know more of them. Jason was curious about you so he agreed. Dick wanted to come as well, but he quickly received a call from Büdhaven. He reluctantly left the two of you together. Dick would have enjoyed some time with his brother too, but maybe you would help. If you helped with Bruce, he was certain you could do pretty much anything. At the same time, he really hoped Jason wasn’t going to scare you away from the family as a way to avenge himself.
But you knew better; you had met Red Hood before and you liked him.
You settled in the café. You started to talk about literature at first. You were both passionate so it was a good conversation starter. You gave each other some recommendations and debated on characters you liked or disliked. Your point of views on characters were often based on your experiences, so it naturally led to a conversion about each other’s lives. And of course, you arrived at the subject of Bruce Wayne.
“I’ll tell him to apologise to you. He shouldn’t have acted that way even if I do agree with the no killing rule” you said “You’re both right in a way, but… Bruce should have talked to you, he should have let you know what was going on with the Joker and why he couldn’t kill him. Why you couldn't kill him either. He should have been there to appease your anger, not the opposite” you said
“You’ll quickly learn that he doesn’t talk much. Especially not about his feelings. If it gets too personal, he’ll push the subject away. If it can hurt him, he’ll run away. He's a bad dad for that. And he might be a bad partner to you as well” Jason told you
“I’m sorry about what happened to you. It must have been so difficult to wake up without your family. And in a body you didn’t know. You did good, despite the murders and everything. Actually, Red Hood has always been my favourite vigilante” you admitted without commenting on the last part of Jason’s words. You wanted to believe that Bruce would make an effort for you.
Jason chuckled as you mentioned his vigilante persona.
“It’s true you never wrote anything bad about me. I thought you were scared of me… Until I realised we actually met” he teased, his eyes litting up
“Oh you remember? Yes I used to live in your territory, and now I’m nearby. I stand by what I said that night: I know what you did for people like us, that’s why I thanked you. Bruce can’t understand what it is to be poor and lost and to have to do bad things to survive. But I’ll make sure he does better with you.” you said “Just promise me to speak with Dick. Your brother looks like he is very eager to have you back in his life. He seemed very sorry you weren’t speaking with him earlier” you added
“I will try to talk with him again then. Thank you for… Thank you. I think I really needed to have this conversation with somebody but no one wanted to have it and I couldn’t really go to a therapist. You’re easy to talk with” he whispered, a little bit awkward
“I know” you smiled “I’m glad if I’ve been able to help”
“Is it your good action of the day to go to Heaven?” Jason joked 
“Absolutely” you giggled
A moment of comfortable silence engulfed the two of you. You both enjoyed your tea before you resumed talking:
“Hey you know what, this is my phone number. You can call or text me whenever you need it.” you offered
“Why?” Jason plunged his eyes onto yours. 
He was definitely not used of adults being there for him, especially without a catch
“Well I’m afraid I’m a family woman and my own family sucks very much. And since Bruce wants me around, I’d prefer it if I can get along with his people. I’d like to take care of you all.” you admitted, feeling a little shy to say all of this out loud.
Jason was also very easy to talk to.
“I don’t think I’m one of his people. Not anymore at least.” Jason sadly smiled at you
“You can be one of mine then. Take it as a repayment for allowing me to go back home every night without having to worry about anyone slicing my throat off” you insisted
“All the pleasure’s mine” he chuckled before saving your number onto his phone “You know, everyone says Bruce is nicer since you’re around. I have to admit this is true. Maybe happiness can truly change a man” 
“Even a bat?” you joked because Jason’s words were touching you a little more than you wanted to show it
“Even a bat” Jason nodded
A few days later, you received a message from Jason, clearly tasting the water with you.
J: Hey wanna go have some lunch together today or tomorrow?
You: Today sounds good :)
After this, you regularly had lunch together and Jason clearly started to see you as a motherly figure, and you saw him as a son. He crashed at your place more than once after patrol, so you could eat together. Bruce never commented on your relationship with Jason, but he heard you when you asked him to apologise.
Which he did.
Jason accepted it and tried his best with Dick and his other siblings. He was still feeling awkward around everyone, but he was slowly spending more time at the manor, even when Bruce was there. 
When Bruce asked if you wanted to meet all of his children anytime soon, you agreed but you instantly sent a message to Jason to make sure he would be there as well. He eagerly agreed because he couldn’t wait for you to be officially a member of the Batfamily.
--
PART 6
--
Taglist for all my work <3
@blublock404
@wind-canoe
@silverklaus
@couldeatthatgirlforlunch
Taglist for Bruce Wayne <3
@alishii
Taglist for this series <3
@Esposadomd
@moraxussy
@resident-cryptid
@legendarypiratecheesecake
@randomnamedmira
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livesworthlivingau · 3 days
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Lives Worth Living Chapter 26-28
ISAT/Two Hats Spoilers below! CW: Outbursts, Mentions of stabbing/killing, unhealthy obsessing.
"So how you holding up Sif?" (You suddenly snap back to reality and look over to Isa, now left alone as the other three had left for the market.)
"What do you mean?" (You ask, confused by the sudden question.)
"You looked a little zoned out there, and getting to see Vale again, and Nille, it's just a lot right now, even if it's good stuff. So... Just wanted to check in with you!" (He gives his trademark bright smile, and you can't help but smile back.)
"It is a lot... but it's good, the family's back together again, even L-Vale now... I just... I really hope it works out this time."
"This time?" (CRAB!!)
"Y-You know! Like, having them around... I want them to fit in is all!" (A more serious look appears on his face. There's no way he bought that...)
"Sif... You know you can tell me anything, right?"
"I do! I know! I... I'm sorry, but it involves them a lot too, and I can't talk about it without them." (Your voice falters a bit, the topic making you uncomfortable as you start to scratch absentmindedly at your arms. His large, gentle hand meet yours after a moment, trying to calm you down.)
"Hey, it's okay, I understand. I just worry, y'know? But if you're sure it's okay for now then I can wait!" (He smiles at you again. You place your head on his shoulder, closing your eye with a relieved sigh.)
"I love you Isa."
"I love you too Sif."
----------------------------------------------------
"Excuse me for a moment, I need to use the restroom~." (Vale explains before leaving the table and conversation. They seemed especially uneasy since Nille left to help Bonbon in the kitchen a few minutes ago, probably still struggling being around everyone else...)
"Siffrin, is there, uhm… Is Vale uncomfortable around us?" (Mira asks, it seems you weren't the only one to notice.)
"They're… just shy, you know? Not used to new people! That's all!" (You try to smile convincingly.)
"Right…" (Crab.)
"They just need some time to warm up is all!" (Isa to the rescue, as always. Thank the stars.)
"They were stuck in the loops too afterall! Sif was the only one they really interacted with, right?"
"No wonder they're so on edge." (Odile chimes in with a little tease, not even looking up from her book.)
"H-Hey!?" (Mira and Isa can't help but snort and snicker at your expense. It WAS a pretty good joke you guess…)
"Though we should discuss what our next course of action is, now that Nille has found us. I assume we'll still head to Bambouche for their sakes, then continue our little reunion tour? I imagine you'd like to return to Jouvente at some point Isabeau?" (Odile begins to plan aloud to get us all on the same page.)
"Eventually, sure, I'm in no rush! But what about you, M'dame? Don't you want to go back to Ka Bue too?" (Odile pauses for a moment, glancing over at you. You must have been making some kind of face considering how she raises a brow at you.)
"I believe our little time traveler here already knows the answer to that question." (You look away nervously.)
"It's uhh... complicated? I don't think Odile cares about returning anytime soon." (You try to keep it vague, to which she nods. Her eyes casually return to her book before she speaks up again.)
"Very astute of you, Siffrin. If I do happen to return, it will likely be out of obligation more than anything else. I believe we have more pressing matters to attend to, like the fact you're still looping."
"I wouldn't exactly call that pressing..."
"Th-This isn't something you should just put off Siffrin! What if it just keeps getting out on the back burner and suddenly you're right back where you started again?!" (Mira chimes in in a panic.)
"I'm not saying we just ignore it forever! Just... we have some time at least, and Odile stopped me from looping once already! If anyone's gonna know what to do, it'll be her, right?"
"I stopped it in the moment, preventing you from looping ever again is a whole ordeal in and of itself. It will take a lot of research on a subject that no one knows anything about, and another that is purely theoretical. I may be good at what I do but I'm not a miracle worker."
"You might not think so." (You chuckle a bit. No matter how many times it happens, she still managed to surprise you over the years with new breakthroughs and theories on craft, sadnesses, and otherwise. She smirks a bit as her eyes remain on her book.)
"While your confidence in my is flattering, I'd still like to tackle this subject sooner rather than later."
"Alright, we'll get to Bambouche and go from there, okay? For now I'm just glad we're all together again..." (Your expression falls to a bittersweet one. You feel Isa's hand on your shoulder, giving a light squeeze and smiling brightly at you. You lay your head against his side and close your eye, savoring the embrace.)
"Dinner'll be ready in a few!... Hey, where'd Vale go?" (Nille asks, stepping back in from the kitchen.)
"Oh! They went to the restroom! B-But it's been a while, hasn't it? should someone check on them?"
"I better do it, y'all sit tight!" (Nille quickly takes the offer to ensure no one else would, heading off to find them.)
----------------------------------------------------
"Before I explain this, it's not their fault, please don't blame them, they were going through a lot and I didn't notice how it was affecting them and I told their secret an-" (You start to explain at a million miles a minute, too frantic to be processed properly even as Nille lightly grabs your shoulders to snap you out of it.)
"Hey, easy, just start at the beginning okay?" (She tries to comfort you, to which you nod and take a deep breath.)
"... When I first looped back all those years, I was... frozen? I was panicking, stuck in my head, I thought it must be a dream or something, there's no way this was really happening, right?... And then I heard their voice... and all of that just went away." (You glance over at Vale. They look... confused? Shocked maybe? You guess you never got the chance to tell them this part.)
"I ran to find them right after, as fast as I could, and... I was just so happy to see them, I didn't think about how they were feeling... forced to be back, I'd been through so much and they were just left behind... and then I dragged them along back here to force them into a family they didn't want any part in."
"Stardust... That's..."
"It's true Vale, and I'm sorry. I really don't blame you for what happened." (Vale just looks away, clearly not agreeing, but they can tell they won't change your mind. Nille still looks very confused, waiting for the story to continue.)
"So things seemed fine for a little while, but then Odile noticed I was doing a little too well, and I told her about everything... including their secret, which they made me promise not to tell." (You really were hamming up how awful you had been, even if you didn't realize it. It was your fault after all, Vale can't be punished for that.)
"Vale found out what I did, they were already on the verge of snapping and that pushed them over the edge, so... they had to go back, before I dragged them to the party... They had to make us all loop back..." (Nille takes a second to process all of this, before her eyes widen, realizing what you were implying.)
"Frin, tell me what happened, please." (She asks, her eyes looking almost desperate, as if asking you to assure her it's not what she thinks.)
"Vale... They..."
"I STABBED HIM! I SHOVED HIS OWN DAGGER INTO HIS HEART AND FORCED HIM BACK, OKAY?! I'M A MONSTER AND A MURDERER!!!" (You jump back as they suddenly start screaming out. You look back to the door, thankful no one else was there at the moment. Nille pulls herself away from their outburst. Looking scared, confused, conflicted.)
"N-No! You're not Vale, you knew I'd be fine! You knew I'd loop!"
"And what if you didn't?!?! What if it all ended right there?!? How could I do such a thing?! How could I take that risk?! How could I hurt you like that?!" (Their eyes were wide and crazed, they gripped their hair painfully tight. They looked ready to snap again. Before you could try to comfort them, Nille was already holding their face to try and snap their out of it.)
"Hey hey hey! Vale, Calm down please." (They stopped suddenly, tears flowing from their eyes and staring back at Nille, surprised they weren't being treated like the monster they thought they were.)
"You made a mistake... a big one, sure, but a mistake none the less. Frin's okay now, right?"
"B-But... I killed them... H-how could anyone forgive me for that?..."
"Well, Frin did, and that's the most important person to do so I'd say... It's a lot to take in alright, still not really sure how I feel about it right now... but I'm not just gonna hate you for it, especially after everything." (Vale stares up at her, they look confused, their eyes darting about as they try to piece something together.)
"I doubt you want to go back in there tonight. Maybe you should stay at the Inn for tonight, cool off a little..."
"Y-Yes... that sounds like it's for the best..." (Before Vale can get too far, Nille lightly grabs their arm to keep them from going too far.)
"This doesn't give you permission to run away though! Remember... you made a promise." (She smiles softly then lets go.)
"... Right... I promise." (Vale can't hold eye contact with either of you for more than a second, slowly starting to walk off again.)
"We'll see you tomorrow, Vale?..." (You plead. They nod back at you before fully turning away. The both of you watch as they slowly vanish from view towards the town center.)
"... Hey, Frin? Are you sure you're okay?" (Nille starts to speak again, now that Vale was safely out of earshot.)
"... It's not that bad, I promise."
"But they killed you Frin... I know they've got issues but... I didn't think they'd be capable of doing that." (Nille holds her arms, gripping them a bit too tightly.)
"They're not! They knew I'd be okay! I'm still looping, it's fine! They would never have done it if they knew it wouldn't happen, like when-" (You cut yourself off, quickly slapping your hand over your mouth.)
"... When what?"
"... After the loops 'ended' the first time, I went to find them... That's when they admitted who they were, and they kinda... snapped. They attacked me, they were ranting and raving, they spent all that time just watching me do it and have an easier time than they ever did, everything they went through and my loops were practically a walk in the park in comparison... But when they had me beaten they couldn't do it! They wouldn't! They're not capable of that I swear!!!" (You do your best to convince her... and possibly yourself in the process. You still blame yourself for what happened, you just don't want Vale to suffer for it.)
"Frin... I'm not saying we should just send them on their merry way or anything but... they still attacked you, they still stabbed you... I don't know if you should just act like that's fine and forget it ever happened..."
"Nille... I've had a very long time to think about this. I've missed them for decades, and now they're finally back... I'm not going to do anything to mess that up, so please don't do so either." (You don't realize it until it's already happened, your face turning to a colder, darker expression. It felt vaguely familiar, likely similar to how you looked in those later loops... Nille looks a bit unnerved by it.)
"Siffrin, that's not healthy! Don't you think you're being a bit obsessive about thi-"
"I don't care!" (Nille jolts in shock, stepping back at your outburst. You stop before you lose it too much, taking a deep breath to compose yourself.)
"I just want them back... I just want them to be happy... I had 30 years of a wonderful life with all of you while they got nothing... Isn't that unfair? Isn't that a tragedy? They go through all the pain and suffering and I just come in and replace them?!"
"Frin! That's no-"
"NO! They're the only reason I'm here! They're the only reason I got to be happy for all this time! So don't you dare get in the way of me making it up to them!" (You snap. Nille stares down at you in a mix of shock and nerves. She looks over you a bit, as if trying to work out the best way to deal with this situation. You sigh and take a step back, making yourself smaller as you duck into your cloak a little.)
"I'm sorry... but please, don't... don't ruin this for me... I need this. I need them... Good night Nille." (You excuse yourself before you say anything else you may regret. You head back inside, ignoring anything she or anyone else may be saying to you as you pass. You reach your room and settle in for bed, not wanting to deal with this day any longer.)
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pardonmydelays · 9 months
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so from now on i am only here for my mutuals and my lovely anons, because i love talking to you guys and i don't want to leave you hanging, my ask box is always open for all of you if you want to share anything with me or ask me about stuff or talk about lin xx
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shmorp-mcdurgen · 20 days
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PROJECT: FREEMAN AU
Okay so I already made a post explaining this au a while back, but it recently got a rewrite so I'm gonna go over it again, in a bit more detail this time, so bear with me
Project: Freeman is an au that takes place in a timeline where the resonance cascade never happened, and Black Mesa is instead focusing not just on teleportation technology and studying Xen, but also finding ways to utilize Xen pools and the micro-organisms inside that are proven to have healing properties. Thus, they spend a lot of their time and funding on experimentation on both Xen animals and human beings, studying how the Xen organisms will heal damaged tissue.
(full explanation below since this might get a little long)
After multiple failed tests, they get a new mysterious sponsor, one promising full funding if they do one more test to prove the technology is worthwhile, and Black Mesa begins work on a new HEV suit to utilize it, fitted specifically for the use of Gordon Freeman, unaware he's even taking part in a test of any kind.
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After a while, the suit does it's job, healing any and all wounds inflicted on Freeman due to the Xen Micro-Organisms being introduced into the system whenever he is harmed. One test even results in Gordon's death, and he is still resurrected using the suit.
However after that test, the Sponsor was not satisfied, and ordered for a month-long endurance test on the suit, being used non-stop for an extended period of time with various methods of both harm and death used to see how long the suit can keep Freeman alive. After a few days, the suit began to show signs of wear, healing wounds incorrectly and at a rate that seemed more harmful that helpful, all while Gordon is still unaware of what is causing it all.
After that, the suit malfunctioned, causing itself to fuse to Freeman's body, unable to be removed or have its life support systems shut off, leaving Gordon to mutate and deteriorate without a way to get help.
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Despite the fact the test was a clear failure, the Sponsor pressured Black Mesa's Administrator to continue until the full month was over, leaving Gordon a pawn to a continuous and agonizing test, unclear when it will end, all while he begins to suspect the ones "helping him" aren't there to help him at all.
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redysetdare · 3 months
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I hate those posts like "this is about aromanticism, don't tag as ace or aroace!" as if aroaces aren't aro enough because of our asexuality, and non-SAM aces relating to aros is somehow a bad thing. Also some of the aroallo accounts are so quick to regurgitate ace discourse talking points because they think aces are erasing and oppressing aros, I hate that so much
Yeah, to an extent I can completely understand where people are coming from when asking this. I have similar issues with people tagging autism posts as ADHD because they show up in my feed because of the ADHD tag even though the post only mentions Autism. It can be frustrating to be looking for posts and get something completely different. But on the other hand...it feels like some people are taking the idea of these tags way too seriously. Tagging is a minimal issue in the grand scheme of things. Tagging does not actually derail a post as much as people act like it does. Tagging a post you reblogged does not make that post show up in the main tags. I understand that AroAllos do not want to have their personal experiences conflated as Asexuality because it can feel like erasure when you write a personal experience about you identity only to have it tagged as something that is not you identity. But also I don't think people realize how much overlap a lot of aromantic and asexual experiences have. Acting like they are so incredibly different and can't have any overlap is willful ignorance at best and malicious separatism at worse. And it's incredibly disheartening as an AroAce to see how many Aro people seem to have gotten comfortable and even feel justified in the low-key bigoted things they've said against aces and aroaces.
Some of the absolutely wild takes I've seen can range from "AroAces shouldn't post in the aromantic tag" to "Don't tag your post as aromantic if it doesn't mention aromanticism [aka doesn't mention an experience in which the viewer deems as an aromantic experience]" to literal straight up acephobia or aroacephobia and it's absolutely wild because as someone who exists in both tags I've seen this happening basically solely in aromantic tags.
It's genuinely wild to me how we even got to this point in the aspec community where people are arguing over tagging to the point of trying to exclude certain aros from the aro tag completely because they feel less seen as compared to others and act like it's the fault of those other aspecs that they are being oppressed.
I was someone who was around when the Aro and Ace communities were mostly a united force. Because when the entire world was against us we at least had each others back. half the problems people mentioned when it came to the reason to split the community so drastically were not problems I ever actually saw. Hell they still aren't problems I see. I'm not saying that it doesn't happen but I personally have not seen anyone assuming or saying that if you're aro you must also be ace, which makes me thing it's not actually as big of an issue as people seem to think it is. the aro and ace communities being united didn't mean that aromantic was a subsection of asexual, though I believe it'd be lying to ignore the split attractions model in the creation of the aromantic identity and how both the Aro and Ace identities as we know them today kind of emerged from that model.
As I said not too long ago: the separation of the aro and ace communities has done more harm than it's done help. We are making it easier for people to target us by splitting up the way we have. By making enemies out of fellow aspec people you give aphobes the space and comfort they need to start pushing us out again.
We are literally in the same boat. if that makes you upset then you can get on your own raft but you can't then demand everyone else get on their own rafts too or try to sink the ship that everyone else is on.
the tag discourse is stupid. there are more pressing issues to be upset about rather than tumblrs shit tagging system. This helps no one. If aroaces posting in the GENERAL AROMANTIC TAG upsets you THAT MUCH then you can literally go into the aroallo tag to find the content you want to see or better yet MAKE THE CONTENT YOU WANT TO SEE. If an asexual tagging a post they relate too with ace bugs you that much then fucking block them. it's not erasure when someone of a different sexuality feels represented by your post. If an aroace tagging a post as aromantic when you feel it is only about asexuality makes you that mad then you can literally block them. You cannot decide how someone should tag their posts because you personally do not know their experience. Grow the fuck up.
I'm rose repulsed. there are barely any spaces and posts about rose repulsed people in the main aspec tags. You want to know what I did? I made my own fucking space. i went to the romance and sex repulsed tags and posted there. I made posts about being repulsed. I have a fucking blog and a discord server centered around repulsed people. Yes it sucks when other people don't make content you like but that's when you have to accept you need to make it your damn self and not throw a fit over tags on tumblr dot com.
apologies for a long rant, If this ask was bait then congrats you got a rant out of me but also I think if people really want to block me over this instead of having a conversation like adults then so be it. Those who think this sort of exclusion is justified and correct are not people i want to be interacting with in the community. they are not people I want following me. I support AroAllos. I support all aromantic people. I understand where they are coming from in their pain. I do agree that they deserve more recognition because they often moralized to be morally bad for their existence and as a repulsed person NO IDENTITY should be viewed as inherently bad. I have no ill will towards AroAllos making posts about ther experience, they deserve to have their experience shared. But the way some people have been acting in the aromantic community is not acceptable and should be called out because at this rate some people are really toeing the line of the ace discourse that happened in like 2016 and as someone who went through that I REALLY don't want to see it repeat itself.
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faebriel · 10 months
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hgs brainrot has returned due to tbosas .. speaking of hgs here’s an ask abt the hgs au: if things were totally different, and Wilbur were to be a 12 victor, what do you think a possible mentor-tribute dynamic would look like between him & Niki? I feel like it would be similar to Snow & Lucy in the way that he’s just going out of his way to cheat n help her
anon u have in fact struck jackpot because this is a concept i was spinning some thoughts abt before bee mentioned avoxes and we went OOOOH at that!!! so yes i have considered rainduo as a mentor-tribute dynamic and would love to talk about that concept too :]
so for this concept i think wilbur and niki would be close friends throughout childhood from 12, and then in their teens wilbur is reaped and, well, no one has particularly high hopes (he's a writer and a musician at heart, not a fighter) but through sheer trickery and dumb luck, he makes it to the end of the games. wilbur pulled some pretty fucked up tricks to win - when you can't use brute force, you have to use your brain - and partly due to the trauma of the games, partly due to his shame and survivor's guilt, he sinks into the capitol and relishes a new life there as a socialite. to him, the old wilbur died in the games and the new one has taken his place - to niki, and to his other friends in 12, whatever the games did to him made him into every vapid heartless capitol victor there is.
or. niki has her doubts. they all saw how horrible the games were, but surely there is some part of him left, some part that's hurting, even if it's buried deep?
anyway.
like og spin of the au, niki is reaped and this sucks - this time she does expect wilbur as her mentor on the train, and she expects some kind of warm welcome (maybe even an apology for leaving them so suddenly and silently? an explanation?) but she gets jack shit. wilbur is jaded and cruel and unrecognisable and niki entirely hates it. this is the part where i REALLY WISH we got some time of those two beefing with each other directly in canon (or at least interactions while niki was So Mad at him) but it's okay we fly blind. niki feels abandoned, lonely, thrown off of her kilter - she expected an ally in this place, but she doesn't recognise the person wilbur has become. she doesn't recognise his shallowness (...much), his ruthless advice for the arena, the way he doesn't seem to care for anything. she's scared and now she's lonely and it pisses her off - their mentorship is fraught. here are some thoughts from discord on that:
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i tend to think of niki as a bit naïve before l'manberg or even doomsday - i think this is an au where this streak would come out real strong, and niki is stubborn that she can get through the games without losing herself. stubborn that she can stop things, that she can protect people. i don't think wilbur is cold enough (or, really, can bear to say aloud) to say that her odds in the arena are slim enough as it is, but he definitely tells her that she's making enemies and that her odds of survival dwindle with the more trouble she causes.
beyond that... hm. niki's trust in wilbur is almost unshakeable until nov 16, even when she outright says she doesn't recognise him anymore. i think she'd reluctantly listen re: don't burn down any buildings, but she would grow bolder each day she had to stay in the capitol. she gets more honest in front of the cameras. she makes more friends in training, and not the ones wilbur recommends. she throws barbs at him every time he makes one of those callous, cold-hearted comments about other tributes and rankings and odds. and besides, she's going in the arena this time, not him. she needs to practice her bravery.
it's like... she hasn't given up on him. she thinks the old wilbur is in there somewhere. (she is wrong. that is not how trauma works.) but she won't hold her tongue just because she
for extra angst points could definitely play up the whole 'feeling abandoned' angle between them as niki goes into the arena - probably due to how fraught their friendship gets leading up to the games. niki wants to focus on them and their friendship, wilbur has stringently cut off (almost) everything from 12 and refuses to let her in; he tells her to behave for the cameras, she tells him she never will. i think the last point in that screenshot would also make for a super tasty argument where niki feels wilbur has gone astray, that he's abandoned 12, and that he'll probably do nothing but sit on his ass and watch her die and he can't even bring himself to care about her anymore, can he? just more fodder for the arena. and honestly, i think wilbur would passively agree with most of that - he values niki's opinion, after all, even now, and if she says he's rapidly descending into a lost cause then she must be right. and it's niki, so she will be fine, and he goes to his bedroom that night and tries to pretend he is sleeping perfectly fine instead of feeling paralysed with fear.
okay now onto the games - YES HE SO WOULD. or at least i think he would go out of his way to help. as for cheating - he's a recent victor for 12 and i think he would value tommy (no doubt a link to him... i think they'd be in touch in this au also) too much to risk the punishment falling onto him as well. i get the vibes this is a games closer to 74th than 10th, so there are far fewer opportunities to cheat and the consequences of getting caught are higher. but schmoozing up sponsors? making stupid ass radio interviews or whatever to talk up niki's odds? sharing anecdotes from their childhood - some real, some entirely fabricated - across capitol airwaves to stoke their sympathy? 100%. with less to lose in this au, i think niki would be far less inclined to play nice for the cameras - i hope you starve, she spits at one of them, and wilbur appears on a talkshow two days later as she scrambles for survival in the arena to talk up how she always saved loaves from the bakery for the poorest mothers and children in 12. he borrows and begs and swindles to the point where it feels like cheating. but hey, this new wilbur is capitol-branded. he knows how to play the game.
if anything he probably sinks into the game a little too much. self-preservation is not his forte. probably wracks up a few heavy debts and favours to owe, but those are not priority until niki is out of the arena, alive. as long as she wins, and as long as the family he has isn't in danger, he will manage. wow it would suck if at some point those two goals became impossible to co-achieve. anyway
i kind of see niki's victory in the arena being similar to the one in the main au - if only because planning out an entire games is hard for meee >-< . she walks in bolder and braver for sure, and with a less strategic pick of allies, but they all get picked off and she spends a few weeks so terrified she can barely sleep and then she ruptures some fuel line and sets the arena alight with a fire that burns brighter and more ravenously than it should. but she wins, and she's airlifted out of a filthy, muddy creek she had resigned herself to die in, and wilbur barges his way through as many peacekeepers so that he can actually see her with her burnt skin and hair and unfocused eyes and trust that what was on the screens wasn't a fluke, and that they made it. and then it's just a matter of surviving the after.
i'm sure there are some other random quirks or tidbits i can think of re: this take on a c!rainduo hunger games au but these are my base thoughts!!
#can i just say whatever the hell lucy grey n snow had going on in part 1 made me so berko btw. like congrats ur my means to an end youre my#symbol youre my buddy? should we kiss? i'll get you out of here / don't make me leave these people behind#BRIDGING OFF OF THE TBOSAS DISCUSSION. i think the thing with crainduo (or at least how i like to depict them) is that they care about each#other extremely deeply and value each other... without being each others number one priority at all times.#i don't think niki plays priority with people she cares for like that; see her relationships with like wilbur and eret in lmanberg#even her friendship with and offering ponk a place to stay in her city after manberg even tho manberg hurt her#as for wilbur: his priority is tommy. like always. if it was just him on the line he'd do anything to get niki thru but it's not#asks#hunger games au#they would truly be such a nightmare in this au like. wilbur's self loathing is SO HIGH due to survivors guilt and trauma and mental illnes#he thinks that niki is So Good and Has It Together meanwhile he is So Bad#and is a mess that she cannot possibly rely on him. she can't possibly need him. she can't possibly want him around#<- and this shit is INGRAINED like. it's not even an active thought pattern anymore it is carved into his brain like a groove#and so shes like. do you even care whether i live or die??#of course he does. but this is the capitol. he cant be vulnerable in a way that matters#and that alienates niki further and this rage and heartbreak is building in her with nowhere to go. and in the arena she thinks it erupts#nah uh. i think its AFTER the area when she has to face wilbur again that she would go full screaming meltdown#ANYWAY !! i really like aus where they have this friction esp because i think like.. idk i think sometimes our views of rainduo are too ros#wilbur kind of forgets about niki sometimes because his self hatred is that bad. niki doesnt get wilburs mental illness and takes it both a#a burden/blame AND a direct rejection of her and her friendship#and they hover just outside of each others spaces anxious and angry and almost self flagellating. GOOD FOR THEM !#anyway Yes this did unlock something within me. thanks anon feel free to add on if u had more thoughts esp re: tbosas and such bc i had suc#a good time watching that movie
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daydadahlias · 1 year
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i dont say this to be rude at all but have some of y’all considered that the reason slash writers keep our stuff on ao3/tumblr is because we want to separate the content we’re creating from the actual people we’re writing about and talking about our work on public platforms where 5sos can see them was never our intention? there’s a legitimate reason I’m not talking about my fics on twitter or instagram (because they’re pretty much the only social media 5sos actively use) so can you guys please respect that decision and not openly publicize my work in places I didn’t originally intend it to be?
#like i love that people talk about fics#but i dont know how to explain that i dont want 5sos to be exposed to my content#and i get talking about it and being vague like 'oh i like this story' but#the second u start dropping names and actual scenes it gets really uncomfortable for me#I certainly don’t want to speak for all slash writers but#I know many of us are on tumblr for a reason#and that’s because this is a safe space to discuss things#and people should not be bringing our stuff outside of this please#please be careful when dropping full names of fics on twitter and ao3 author names and such#on a platform that 5sos can see#like I don’t want to say ‘don’t talk abt the fic!!’ but I do want to ask y’all to be a little more careful when you do#I’m not inherently bothered by people talking about fic on twitter#but if you’re dropping the phrase ‘scene 14 my fave lashton fic’ I need you to Stop doing that and I’m dead serious#uhm also kind of a weird side note but why r u guys talking abt fics on public platforms that authors aren’t on#like can u just. talk to us?#I don’t. really enjoy going on twitter and seeing people talk abt me without talking To me#especially if those people aren’t leaving comments or anything?#just kind of sad to see fic being turned into an consumer culture instead of what it should be#which is sharing stories and getting to talk to people abt it#ok sorry if this is too negative byeee#and I’m not saying this on twitter bc im scared of it hehe#and I just kind of want to say it sigh#I’m not gonna Stop people from doing it#bc I don’t want to dm people on twitter and go ‘stop being publicly nice to me pls’#but it’s just. smthn to be aware abt#if u have twitter and also tumblr
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u5an5 · 2 years
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*grabs you like a squeak toy* You, i like how you think. I need more of this *points at your Venom!GhostSoap au* please
Guys, you need to understand that I don't usually have that good ideas. This one was just a mixture of sleep deprivation and my actual hiperfixation (that changes more irregularly than my mood) being the topic.
If I don't get an Urge™ sudden need to write about something, despite how much inconvenient and out of place it is, that has to be satisfied. Otherwise I'm not able to do anything productive, then I don't write. I'm not able to write on my own. I need to have inspiration from someone else to even start making something myself.
So if you guys want more content from me then you need to feed me with it first, I don't know what to tell you xD
But it's nice to know that someone likes my garbage <3
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ame-to-ame · 3 months
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oh. hm.
#i had a realization today and now i feel so absolutely horrible.#when i was out w friends today one of them wasn't having a good time and stepped out for a moment#and in the back i could hear the other 2 whispering to each other basically abt how she's been like this last time they hung out too#the consensus unspoken was that there was sth off. but they kinda just kept moving along. i stepped out for a bit bc i felt like idk.#she's out alone on the streets someone has to make sure she's okay right.#when I'm back one of them goes oh i was just wondering where you were. as if everything is normal.#after a bit of wandering around in the store the other goes oh where is xxx? as if we weren't all there when she said she's gonna step out.#as if they didn't discuss her behavior right after.#and it suddenly reminded me of when i found my ex with her head buried in her hands when i was gone for a bit.#and i was like oh what's going on and the other 2 there were just chatting and one of them just is like idk she's sleeping.#She Was Crying. I was so. idk. i was panicking i was so worried. And I was so mad too bc how could they not notice a friend being unwell??#and i hated myself for it bc it was my fault for leaving her there and i had her id and it was really my fault and i wouldn't have known#i wouldn't have known that. idk. i thought she was left with people who were her friends who should then pay attention to her wellbeing#idk i. i would have trusted my friends to take care of or at least be aware of how i feel.#but we left for a bit and nobody even noticed. what happened. someone even texted asking where did we go.#and idk it's just the same thing i just realized and connected the dots. they will pay lip service. they will tell u they care abt u.#and they will echo it among themselves oh i worry abt xxx is xxx okay oh yeah xxx has been acting like this as if it actually does anything.#and nobody will actually make sure later on. that she is actually. doing fine. that they can do what's good for her atm.#and God. I'm just realizing that. idk. i. i wish i could've been a better support for my ex if she really had needed it at the time. idk.#i was just listening to what other ppl were telling me. but i. i didn't think it through. if these are the ppl she has for support.#if they didn't care to make me feel cared for. if they didn't care to check if she was okay back then. idk i. God.#oh God. what if i fucked up majorly. god. oh god. idk i just thought they treated me like that bc thry we're mad at me#but what if it's. not a me issue. and i shouldn't have trusted that other ppl would take care of her. bc they aren't. trustworthy in that.#ugh but at the same time. she asked for space from me. what else was i supposed to assume than that she didn't want me around?#at the very very least at least I'm sure her family loves her a lot and will care for her and make sure she's okay. god. i hope so.#idk!! i care but in my position i don't think me caring or wanting to help does anything. she doesn't want my support. she doesn't want me.#idk it's something wrong w me probably i genuinely don't know. she's the one telling me she's worried I'm pushing ppl away so.#it's not behavior she condones ig so it makes no sense if she does it herself if she believed i was good for/to her but still pushed me away#so in conclusion There's gotta be something that i fucked up There's gotta be sth wrong w me but i. god. i.#i have so much to nitpick with myself i genuinely don't even know if I'm a good measure or judge of what i did wrong or right.
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myname-isnia · 1 year
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As a result of hormones, being generally exhausted from lack of sleep, and the crushing pressure of the realisation that in a year I’ll be a legal adult, I have spent the last half an hour sobbing into my pillow. Fun times all around
#I don’t know what I want to do with my life#I don’t want to do anything with it#I’m so fucking emotionally unstable I can barely handle three hours of school a day#and you want me to go to college or uni? to get a job after? to live a life where I can’t afford to randomly break down in the evenings?#and for so long when I said ‘I don’t know’ the answer was ‘that’s okay#you have time’#but that answer’s changed now#I don’t have time#I need to decide which exams I’m doing right now so the school knows which lessons to give me#I need to decide if I’m leaving after this year or staying so I can go to uni after#I need to make so many fucking decisions and I just cannot handle it#and it’s so terrifying that the ‘when you grow up’ has been dropped from the ‘what do you wanna be’ discussion#because I have grown up. this is it. I’ll be an adult next year#and I’m still as lost as I was when I was 12#while everyone else seems to have figured it out#at least they can give a straight answer when asked#meanwhile all I can say is ‘a history major’ all the while not knowing if I truly mean it#I wanted to go to art school a year ago. an English teacher six months before that#now I realise none of those things speak to me#and I’m scared#I’m so fucking scared. of failing. of never figuring myself out. of ending up as a worthless good for nothing#like my dad says I will#even my little sister has her shit together. she’s the one he’s putting all faith in now#while I just. exist. completely lost and confused and feeling everyone’s disappointed eyes on me at all times#nothing can capture my attention for more than a few months. I can’t realistically put myself through four years of study#there is nothing I love doing in this world. I can’t even bring myself to indulge in hobbies most of the time#let alone turn anything into a job or field of study. it feels like I’m trying to brute force my way through life#like a toddler who keeps shoving a shape into the wrong hole and not understanding why it’s not working#I just want someone to tell me what I should do. to read my mind like they’re Janet from the good place and tell me what would suit me best#but that’s impossible. the world doesn’t work like that. I’m on my own. and I’ve reached the tag limit so rant over. I suppose
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dduane · 4 months
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I just received a copy of a book I've been very much looking forward to by a favorite author, but the quality of the book itself is... not great. Cheap paper, weak binding, even a weird illustration of the main character on the cover that I'm having trouble believing the author approved. Obviously, I don't want to leave a bad review on Amazon or GoodReads or anywhere, as I'm 100% certain the content is as excellent as her other work. But how can I best let the publisher (Baen) know I'm disappointed without threatening to never buy her books again? Because, well, if this is the only option, I'm gonna keep buying them even in my disappointment.
Well, the first thing I thought when I read this was "Wow, I'm really glad I don't have anything in print from Baen at the moment except a couple of anthologized short stories." :)
As for the rest of it, let's take it point by point.
Adding a cut here, because this will run a bit long. Caution: contains auctorial bitching and moaning, painful illustrations of cases in point, and brief advice on how to complain most effectively. (Also links to paintings of cats.)
Cheap paper: This has been an accurate complaint since well before COVID—and it's often been worse since, with supply chain issues also being involved. That said: one way publishers routinely save money on printing books, especially the bigger ones, is by going for thinner/cheaper paper. I remember one of our UK editors going on at great length and with huge annoyance—during one of those late-night convention-bar bitch sessions—over how the only way they could get some really good books published (because Upstairs insisted on reducing the per-copy production costs) was by reducing the paper quality to the point where you could nearly read through it. Sacrificing decent text size(s) also became part of this. Nobody in editorial was happy about the result: but there wasn't much they could do.
Bad bindings: Similar problem. Sewn bindings used to be a thing in paperbacks... but not any more: not for a good while, now. These days, it's all glue. Even hardcovers are showing up glued rather than sewn. Don't get me started. :/ (This is why I so treasure some of the oldest paperbacks I've acquired, which are actually sewn.)
Crap covers: I've had my share of these—though my share of some really good ones, too. And one of the endless frustrations of traditional publishing is that the writer routinely has little or even no influence over what the cover will look like... let alone how much will be spent on it, or (an often-related issue) how good the execution will be.
There are of course exceptions. If you're working at the, well, @neil-gaiman -esque level or similar in publishing, a lot more attention is going to be paid to your thoughts. You may even be able to get "cover veto" written into your contracts, so that if you disapprove, changes will get made. But without actual contractual stipulations, the writer has zero legal recourse or way to withhold approval. (And I bet even Neil has some horror stories.)
The normal workflow looks like this. After a book's purchased, its editor and the art director discuss what it's about and what the cover should look like. The art director then hires an artist and tells them what to do. After that, the artist executes their vision and gets paid. It is incredibly rare for a writer to have any significant input into this process. And as to whether or not they approve of the final result, well... the publisher mostly just shrugs and goes back to eyeing the bottom line, muttering "Who told them they get a vote?"
Now, I've been seriously lucky to occasionally be an exception in this regard. In particular, my editors at Harcourt (when Jane Yolen and Michael Stearns were editing Harcourt's Magic Carpet YA imprint) would ask me what I thought would be a good idea for the next Young Wizards cover, and I'd think about it a bit and send them back a paragraph or so about some core scene. They'd then talk to their art director, and after that send their notes and mine to Cliff Nielsen (who started doing the covers for the hardcover and mass-market paperback editions of the series in the mid-90s) or to Greg Swearingen (who was the artist on the digest-format editions). And the results, by and large, were pretty good. ...I also think affectionately of the UK artist Mick Posen, who insisted on seeing pictures of our cats before painting the covers for the Hodder editions of The Book of Night with Moon and On Her Majesty's Wizardly Service (the UK title for To Visit The Queen).
But this kind of treatment is a courtesy—not even vaguely suggested in the books' contracts, and very much the exception to the rule. And for every writer who's midlist, there are times when the luck runs out. For example: one time I wrote a book that was an AU-Earth-near-future fantasy police procedural, thematically pretty dark—dealing with issues of abuse of megacorporate power, institutionalized bigotry, and (explicitly) attempted genocide. And the cover, done by an artist who's a good friend and some of whose fabulous art hangs in our house, came out looking like this. It was... let's just say "not ideally representative."
So I was glad, when my local workflow allowed it, to recover the current, revised version of the book with something at least a little more apropos. But the original cover's not the artist's fault. He did what the art director told him... as a cover artist must do to get paid, and (ideally) to get hired again. At present, that's how the system works.
...So. You've got a badly-built and -presented book on your hands. How best to make your feelings known in some way that might make a difference down the line? (As you make it plain that you'll keep buying this author's books this way if you must.)
First of all: when (as part of my psych nursing training) we were taught how to complain most effectively, we were told that the first and most basic rule of the art is this:
Only Complain To Someone Who Can Actually Do Something About Your Problem
So I salute your desire not to waste your time taking the issue to the reviews on Amazon, or the pages of Goodreads... because they can't do anything. The odds that anyone from production at Baen is reading the comments there strike me as... well, not infinitesimally small, not being hit-by-a-meteorite-while-in-the-shopping-center-parking-lot small... but really low.
So: write to corporate.
In your place I would go online and rummage around a bit to find out who's on record as the publisher at Baen. I would then write them a letter on paper. And I would lay out the problem pretty much as you laid it out up at the top.
The tone I think I'd choose would be the more-in-sorrow-than-in-anger approach. I'd say, "I write to comment about your recently published book by [X Writer], whose work I love. I have to say, though, that I don't think the cover on [X Book] is terribly representative of the quality of the prose inside. And also, the construction and production quality of the book itself was a disappointment to me because [here spell out why].
"I'd really like to see [X. Writer's] books succeed with you, and I'd like to buy more of them without wondering whether I was going to be disappointed again. But if this is typical of how they're being produced, I'd also be concerned that the state of these books is setting up a situation in which the author's sales will be damaged, and you would stop publishing them... which would really be a shame. Whereas on the other hand, better production quality could keep previous purchasers coming back and buying, not only more books by this author, but books by others whom you publish."
This phrasing, as you'll have seen, walks a bit wide around the issue of your further purchases, while directing attention toward the bottom line... which will routinely be what the publisher's looking at from day to day. And—being, one has to hope, in possession of the wider picture as regards what's going on with their production costs—maybe they can actually do something about it.
Anyway, nothing ventured, nothing gained, yeah? It's worth a try. All you can do is hope for the best.
And finally: please know that I admire your commitment to the author: whoever she is, she's lucky to have you. It's a terrific thing to have readers who'll willing to spend the time to hunt you down, and who're willing not to judge a book by its cover. :)
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ham1lton · 2 months
Text
GOOD LUCK, BABE!
pairings: charles leclerc x reader (romantic/platonic).
summary: friendships don’t always survive, you and charles would know.
warnings: cheating towards the end. no smut but a makeout session. sorry alex 💔
author’s note: the brocedes au that me and anon wanted. i’m trying something new btw. let me know how u feel about it.
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you never imagined yourself in the same room as charles. not willingly anyways. yet, when you received the invitation with his handwritten note asking you to come. you knew you couldn’t say no. you had spent so much of your childhood discussing the future. he wanted a family. three kids, a dog and a gorgeous wife that loved him. you wanted a career. the glory, the accolades and the fans that loved you.
he made you promise one day that you’d be at his wedding. you were fifteen at the ice cream shop that he’d always drag you too. you had snuck out without arthur in order to have an extra scoop after charles’ dad had paid for the ice cream you’d had earlier. he looked over at you, eyes serious and asked you to be his best man — (“best woman, best girl. it doesn’t matter. i just want you next to me. i’m serious yn.” he took a lick of his ice cream and the seriousness melted away when he left a smudge on his nose.)
you didn’t break promises easily.
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however, when arthur came running up to you, asking you to follow him. when your relationship with charles disintegrated, you never lost touch with arthur. he was like a little brother to you. you would very rarely meet him for brunch in whatever city you happened to both be in. so when he asked you to follow him, you did willingly.
“where are we going?” you ask, as he pulls you along by your right hand. “usually, whenever you don’t give me context it means you’re doing something bad. is this something bad leclerc?”
“when am i ever doing something bad?” he looks over his shoulder and gives you a wink. you roll your eyes. he plants you in front of a room and nods at it. you stare at him blankly.
“okay? i’m not a mind reader arthur.”
“i need you to help me look for something.” he nods at the room. “in there.”
“you can do it yourself.” you turn to leave before he runs in front of you and stops you.
“listen. i don’t care if you had that weird breakup with my brother,” you start to protest that it wasn’t a breakup but he stops you. “but you didn’t need to cut me off too. you were a part of my life too. you abandoned me too.”
“i don’t ask you for anything yn but i need your help. i’m looking for my silver cufflinks. i need them.” he raised his cuffs to show you the distinct lack of cufflinks. “please. i’m begging you. i wouldn’t ask otherwise.”
you didn’t expect to come here to be blackmailed and guilt tripped but it was working. you avoided everything leclerc. even his family, especially his family if you were being honest. they went from being your second family to nothing at all.
“okay.” you nod. “i’ll get your cufflinks.”
arthur smiles and opens the door for you to walk in. it’s someone’s hotel room. either arthur’s or a friend’s. it’s messy and you sigh. it’ll be hard finding them in this mess but you start carding through clothes.
“yn?”
you know that voice anywhere. you turn around and it’s charles. he’s half dressed in his wedding suit, his crisp white shirt half unbuttoned. his hair is still messy as if he’s ran his hand through nervously multiple times. you smile with no teeth and move to open the door. it’s locked.
“arthur leclerc! open this fucking door!” you seethe. you bang against the door and hear his voice through the material.
“not until you fucking talk! i’ll be back in half an hour.” you hear his footsteps walk away. you turn to charles who smiles sheepishly at you.
“tea?”
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ham1ltonshaderoom: it seems all the rumours are true. sworn enemies f1 drivers charles leclerc and yn yln have seemed to call a truce to celebrate his wedding to art historian alexandra saint mleux. she was seen wearing a dark green vivienne westwood gown as she celebrated the couple’s nuptials.
what do we think about the rekindling of this flame, ham1ltons?
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user1: CHARLESYN IN THE SAME ROOM NO ARGUING NO FIGHTS WE CHEERED!!
user2: i wish we had pictures of her. she always eats her outfits.
-> user3: wtf how does she digest them?
-> user2: figure of speech babe <3
user4: did she have a date??
-> user5: her longtime boyfriend!!
user6: they worked it out on the remix
-> user7: so FERRARI ❤️
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charles makes you the tea. he doesn’t finish buttoning his shirt as he pours it into a mug for you. he remembered how you liked it - two sugars and a splash of milk. you stay silent but nod gratefully.
it’s been so long since you’ve been alone with him. you’re not the same wide eyed kid but neither is he. he’s getting married and you’re giving him the silent treatment. he sits on the edge of his bed awkwardly. tapping his thigh with a single finger.
“thank you for coming,” he says. “i didn’t think you would.”
“the handwritten invitation was a nice choice,” you sip your tea. “personal. did everyone else like it?”
“only yours was,” he coughs into his elbow. “handwritten. i mean. only yours.”
that’s news to you but you don’t have time to ponder what that means before he speaks again.
“i’ve thought for the longest time on what i’d say to you if i got the chance. everything. how sorry i was, how sorry i am, how much i hated you and how much you meant to me. you were my best friend yn. my best friend. no one has even come close to what you were for me.” he chuckles as he presses his palms into his eyes. “who else could i talk to besides you?”
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(insert a tiktok edit of the two of you throughout your careers. the song playing over it is the song ‘chemtrails over the country club’ by lana del ray specifically the lyrics ‘nobody’s son/nobody’s daughter’. it gets 167k likes.)
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“do you still hate me?” charles looks at you under his lashes.
“of course i do. you hurt me.”
“you hurt me. but i don’t hate you.” charles fidgets in his seat. he stretches his hands to place them on his knees. you sip your tea. “do you remember when i asked you to be my best woman?”
you nod.
“i didn’t mean that. i wanted you to be my wife.”
you would choke on your tea if you didn’t know that information but charles wasn’t subtle. yet it was a case of missed opportunities. you didn’t like him then and he didn’t like you now.
“i couldn’t hate you yn. god knows i tried. it hurts me knowing that you hate me as i could never hate you. i said all that shit because i was hurt and angry. you said i was a shitty driver. that is wouldn’t have won without ferrari’s strategies which we both know are shit-“
“i’m sorry, i didn’t know you still cared about my opinion.” you interrupt. your voice still has a defensive edge to it. he just shrugs.
“i’ll always care about your opinion.”
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CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)
user1: editing yn to l’amour de ma vie by billie eilish (extended version) rn 😋
user2: what part?
user1: listen from 2:15 till 2:56!!
user3: THATS GONNA EATT OMGGGG
user4: wish we could edit the wedding appearance of the two of them omggg.
user5: when i get off my lazy ass and finish my edit of them to ‘the girl so confusing’ remix
user6: do y’all think they’re talking at the wedding?
user7: babe do you know yn? she’s probably at the very corner of the reception right now. she’ll take a pic with every other leclerc besides charles and probably leave before dinner is served.
user8: you’re so real. yn would NEVER talk to charles let alone be alone with him. i hate it but it’s the truth.
user9: plus charles is probably busy with the wedding.
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you never considered yourself to be a bad person but making out with your ex best friend/teammate literally a few hours before he’s about to get married? that’s a bitch move.
you try to think about his fiancée. she’s probably getting ready excitedly with her family and friends. thinking about being the future mrs leclerc while you’re two minutes away from committing adultery on both of your partners.
you pull apart from charles. he looks at you with wide eyes.
“we can’t fucking do this. we’re awful people,” you sit up. “my fucking lipgloss is all over your mouth.”
“i look good in pink. it’ll be fine.” he wipes it off.
“you have a fiancée. you’re getting married.”
“tell me the word and i’ll call it off. just for you.” he looks at you. “i’m quitting f1 after this year anyways. i’m not attempting to go for the second championship. i don’t want it.”
“how do you not want it?”
“we have different priorities but i won’t be a f1 driver anymore. you always said you couldn’t date a driver. i’ve grown now. i’m fine being in your shadow. i love it. i want it.”
he looks at you as serious as he did when he asked you to be his best woman all those years ago.
“what do you want yn?”
you bite your lip, and think.
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CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)
user7: i’m hoping we get at least a picture. just one.
user4: i would DIE!!! imagine!!!
user3: charlesynnies suffer every day and everyone else wins.
user2: i think yn is right there with charles. maybe dancing.
user1: he always said she’d be at his wedding. he was right. i think there is still love there.
user5: FINISHED MY FUCK ASS EDIT PLEASE LIKE AND COMMENT ON TIKTOK BESTIES
user6: okay i wrote a little fic for ao3. it’s called ‘wait until you like me again’!! it’s domestic charlesyn as they are forced to work everything out. kinda angsty but really smutty.
user1: spamming u both charlesynnies are the best idc <3
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charles_leclerc: say hello to mr and mrs leclerc 💍
tagged: alexandrasaintmleux
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yourusername: happy for you 💕
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INTERVIEW WITH CHARLES LECLERC
interviewer — so is it true? you’re renewing your ferrari contract?
charles (laughing) — it is true. racing is my life. this is it for me. it’d take something big to take me away from it.
interviewer: you all heard it here first!
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— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 @blushmimi @evans-dejong @nixisracing @lethalvenus @santanasaintmendes @idontknowlmaoo @sainzluvrr (charles specific tags will be added to the comments!)
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