#if there’s anyone else who loves these books pls reach out

[sleep1ng-w1llow]

i’m probably the only person here who cares about these books but i’m gonna talk about them anyway

the books in question being openly straight and honestly ben by david leviathan.

first, some summaries, with spoilers

openly straight comes first in chronological order, and was also published first. it follows rafe, a gay teenager from colorado, who is sick of being “the gay kid” in his highschool. so he changes schools, and moves to an all-boys boarding school in massachusetts, determined not to tell anyone he’s gay. but while there, he meets ben, a quiet and incredibly buff guy, who he develops a huge crush on. they grow close, moving from friendship to something more. but for ben, this is his first non-hetero experience, and he doesn’t know rafe was openly gay in colorado. once he finds out, his trust is shattered.

honestly ben follows ben during the semester after his experience with rafe. he stays away from rafe, and meets someone from the all-girls boarding school nearby, and begins to fall for her. but eventually, he accepts rafe’s apologies, and they begin as friends, though ben still misses their previous relationship. he also struggles with the fact that he is still heterosexual. rafe is the only exception. throughout the book ben also contemplates labels, misogyny, his identity, and how the people around him view him.

from everything i’ve seen online, it seems that openly straight received much more positive attention than honestly ben, but the main reason for that is confusing to me. many people preferred rafe’s perspective to ben’s, because rafe was more active. he was characterized through his actions rather than feelings. i feel like this is just a reflection on their differing personalities tho. rafe is more outgoing and outspoken, whereas ben takes more time to process his feelings, not one to stir things up, wants to be sure of situations before acting. because of that, he’s characterized through his thoughts and feelings more than his actions.

i read honestly ben first, before i knew openly straight existed. i loved it so much, loved the angst and sensitive topics, and all the delicate relationships ben balanced throughout the semester. his internal monologues were insightful and interesting to me. i was excited to read openly straight for the first time, but a little let down by it. i guess i was also confused how ben could be boring to people. i wished i could be more like him.

anyways that’s my little talk. i probably won’t do many more book review type things, but i doubt y’all have heard the last of ben and rafe from me

[lelengerine]

pairing. cafe owner!chenle x regular customer!reader

synopsis. chenle might just have a thing for his cafe's regular customer, based on a req!

genre. cafe au, love at first sight mixed with a little puppy love, chenle’s like a goldie retriever here :(( i swear, mentions of food, reader uses she/her pronouns for this one, ft. jisung and jaemin, pls lmk if anything was missed!

wc. 1.0k words

notes. i love this one so much (i say that almost every time i have a new thing written) but it's chenle who are we kidding ofc i have favoritism… slight. likes and feedback are highly appreciated!

m.list

chenle wasn’t the type to hover. 

he trusted his staff—jisung handled the customers, jaemin worked his magic in the kitchen. that left him to observe from the sidelines, content to manage from a comfortable distance. it wasn’t laziness, more like knowing where he fit in the daily rhythm of the café.

but the moment you walked in, everything shifted.

it was nothing special at first. the soft chime of the door, the way the afternoon light caught the edge of your face as you stepped inside, looking around with a quiet curiosity. chenle had been by the counter, flipping absentmindedly through the register logs. he wasn’t paying attention to much until he saw you. it was like the air in the room shifted, pulling his focus to you as if he’d been waiting for something but hadn’t realized it until that moment.

you took a few steps in, glancing at the menu board above the counter. jisung, ever efficient, moved to take your order, but chenle stepped forward without thinking, his voice coming out before he even realized it.

“i’ll take care of it,” he muttered, sliding in front of the lanky boy and ignoring the surprised look thrown in his direction.

jaemin, who was watching from the back with flour dusted on his apron, gave chenle a knowing look, but said nothing.

chenle paid neither of them any attention, turning his gaze to you whose eyes were eagerly scanning the menu above the counter. “what can i get for you?”

you smiled, polite but distant, ordering a cup of mocha latte—voice reaching him in soft but clear syllables. chenle couldn’t help but hold onto each word as you spoke, wanting the moment to stretch just a little longer.

when you took your seat by the window, chenle made your drink himself, pushing aside jisung’s attempts to do his job. it wasn’t even about making the best coffee; it was about making your coffee. a strange feeling stirred in his chest as he watched the milk swirl into the espresso, the heart-shaped foam settling on top with more care than he’d ever thought to put into a simple drink.

it became a routine after that. you came in regularly, and each time, chenle found himself moving before anyone else could. jisung and jaemin didn’t even try to get involved anymore, knowing how stubborn their boss could be. they’d just exchange quiet glances and sometimes a snort of laughter when chenle would rush to be the first to greet you.

he knew your order by heart—mocha latte, no whipped cream, always served in the same spot by the window. he’d bring it to you, trying not to hover too long, hoping each time that maybe this would be the day you’d stay a little longer, or say something more than the usual thank you.

but you never did.

you’d sip your coffee, eyes on your book, and the world outside would blur as you disappeared into your reading. he’d watch, just for a moment, trying to convince himself that the way you quietly smiled to yourself meant something, that maybe you noticed how much care he put into each cup, but weeks passed, and nothing changed. 

you’d finish your drink, leave quietly, and chenle would be left with the echo of your absence. he started to wonder if it had all been in his head—if maybe he’d read too much into your polite smiles and the way you kept coming back. the doubt crept in slowly, like the steady ticking of a clock, until it was all he could think about every time you left without saying more.

today felt the same. you walked in, and he already had your mocha ready before you reached the counter, your usual spot by the window waiting for you. you gave him that same smile, soft and distant, and he tried to hide the way his heart leapt when you looked just a little surprised that he had your drink ready before you asked.

“you remembered,” you said, tone light, almost teasing.

chenle shrugged, trying to seem casual even as his pulse quickened. “it’s not hard. you come in here a lot.”

you laughed—soft, barely more than a breath, but it was enough to make his chest tighten. a small thank you made its way past your lips, and then, just like every other time, you disappeared into your little corner with a book in hand, sipping your drink as if the rest of the world didn’t exist.

chenle watched you from behind the counter, torn between the quiet hope that had kept him going for weeks and the creeping disappointment that maybe, just maybe, this was all it would ever be. the unspoken silence between you stretched on, and by the time you finished your drink, the weight of his thoughts had settled into something heavier.

you left, like always, slipping out the door with only a glance back. chenle sighed, staring at the empty cup you’d left behind. another day, another missed chance. he walked over to clear the table, mind already drifting to the usual routine, until something caught his eye.

a small piece of paper, folded neatly beneath the cup.

he picked it up, his breath catching as he unfolded it, scanning the words quickly, then again, just to be sure he wasn’t imagining it.

i’d like it better if you sat down and ate with me instead of staring from behind the counter next time. my treat, pinky promise.

your phone number was scribbled beneath the note, as if it were the simplest thing in the world.

chenle froze for a second, blinking at the piece of paper in disbelief, then suddenly grinned, pumping his fist in the air with a quiet yet triumphant “yes!”

from behind the counter, jisung and jaemin watched him, snickering quietly, exchanging knowing looks.

“has he finally gone insane?” jisung said in a deadpan.

jaemin just shook his head, a smirk playing on his lips. “just let the boy live a little. it’s not always that we catch him like this.”

“that boy is still your boss.”

“eh, he’s still younger than me.”

“your point being…?”

and despite being more than aware of jisung and jaemin’s bickering from behind the counter, chenle didn’t care. all he could think about was the next time you walked in, and how this time, he wouldn’t just be serving you.

this time, he’d be sitting with you.

[incogrio]

omg I loved your soobin fic btw! I was wondering can you do ot5 txt being jealous/protective of the reader?

ot5 - jealousy, jealousy

pairing: ot5 x reader (separately)

genre: fluff, bit of smut and angst

synopsis: how the members show jealousy!

warnings: jealousy, possessiveness, smut, anger etc!

a/n: thank you so much for the request!! hope u enjoy!! this isn’t proof read don’t kill me pls!!

yeonjun:

i feel as though yeonjun would show his jealousy in a more whiney manner

like, he wouldn’t outright say anything to you or the person making him jealous in the moment

i imagine you’re also an idol, maybe even in txt and an interviewer makes comments about your appearance and how you’re the most desirable of the group

yeonjun, being ever professional simply smiles and laughs

lingers behind you as you reject the guy once the cameras are off

but after… he’ll come to you like a big baby all like

“he flirted with you right in front of meeeee..!!” he’d whine out with a slight high pitched tone as he tucked his head into your neck

“i rejected him, i only want you jjunie,” you’d reassure

only for him to respond with, “but i was right thereeeee!!! don’t i look boyfriend enough!!!!” and his perfect lips would form a perfect pout and you couldn’t resist but to kiss his sad face away :(

that would most likely lead to him smiling against your lips and the craziest sex ever.. like full on

“bet he has a smaller dick than me, huh? bet he couldn’t make you drool the way i do. he wishes he could see you like this doesn’t he? too bad only i can see you all disheveled.. only me, right baby? just daddy right?”

yes jjunie has a daddy kink argue with the WALL.

as for what made him jealous, i think he’s a little crazy and would be annoyed when someone so much as looks at you for too long

he would never blame you or your outfit, simply the pervs who wish they could have you

thinks it’s funny whenever you’re jealous, doesn’t really see that he’s just as hot as you

also finds it crazy that you’d think he’d want anyone else

just remind him that you only want him and kiss his pouty lips and maybe give him a blowjob and he’ll be fine…

until you do promotions again

soobin:

sigh… loser soobie doobie.

i feel like soobie would be annoyed by it if anything

also VERY passive aggressive

let’s say you’re in a library, looking at a book that you might want

a rando comes up mansplaining the novel you’re holding and soobin comes up behind you like 😒🤨

FR LOOKS AT HIM WITH SUCH DISGUST.

yall know that clip of him during that live where he’s looking at the members w that disgusted look? yeah that’s him rn

the guy reaches forward to touch your arm all like “i just think this book might be too complicated for you”

ha. ha ha. soobin pulls you back into his chest before the guy can touch you and looks at him so angrily. “they’re fine. they can pick their own book.” he says it with such an eerily calm tone despite his aggressive gum chewing and fingertips digging slightly into your waist.

mf just gives an awkward smile, raises his hands in surrender and walks away

soobin literally mutters “pussy” under his breath LMFAO

he doesn’t really say much after that, only keeping a hand on you till you get to the car

“bunny, do you think i should read this book or this one first?” you ask, lifting up both books as he pulls out of the parking lot.

he rolls his eyes slightly, driving (hotly) and looking only at the road before saying: “dunno. ask your new book expert boyfriend.”

you literally have to stifle your laugh. for soobie, he’s a sucker for your cuteness

soooo u just pout at him cutely and rest your elbow on the console and your head in your hand

“don’t be mad bunny… only want you :(“

he does that thing where he smiles and pokes his tongue to his cheek in faux annoyance (i’m horny)

just smiles and shakes his head, reaching to you and holding your thigh tightly, you rest your hand on his

he may seem all tough right now, but don’t worry soon you’ll have him tied up and whimpering after making him cum over and over to make sure he knows his worth 💋

tbh seems like the type to bring it up randomly too LMFAOO

beomgyu:

beomgyu… hehehe

i imagine this to happen outside of a food truck

he’s waiting w you, probably talking to you about something stupid and you suddenly get a poke on the shoulder

you turn around, and beomgyu looks with you and sees a guy

as you’re rejecting the guy, gyu is literally snickering and giggling to himself

you are so embarrassed by him this mf is literally cackling

you’d think there was a witch behind you

the guy is definitely STILL in earshot as he walks away dejectedly, and beomgyu immediately giggling and smoothly tugging you to be in his arms

“did you see his face???? he thought he had a chance w you???!!! my girl?? yahhhgh!!! he’s soooo stupid!” he says all loudly and dramatically. he has that little smirk on his face as he says this, but has his arms tightly around you as though the guy would come and kidnap you

you see behind the facade, simply reaching up and pressing a kiss to his lips. “only want you,” you mutter, and he hums and smiles against your lips

“ahhh i knowww!! that’s why it’s so funny!”

he’d rather die than admit insecurity in the middle of a goddamn food truck line.

probably doesn’t talk about it until it’s late at night and you’re cuddled in bed

he might even start crying :(

for gyu, i don’t see sex being a good reassurance thing for him

i think he’d prefer to just sit with you, watching a bad movie and making fun of it together

randomly kissing you and every time you know what he wants to hear: “only want you, bear”

if you were to fuck, he’d deffo want to eat you out

“only i can taste this pussy, only your bear,” he’d grumble as you twist his long hair in your fingers, tugging him closer to your sopping cunt

taehyun:

mickey mouse voice: oh boy!

if you think you’re getting any other reaction other than silence, you’re WRONG.

hmmm let’s say you’re at the gym, watching him work out bc wow free show

at one point he walks away to grab weights from the other side of the gym and you wait for him to come back

suddenly, a sweaty yucky man is getting closer to you, and oh wow look he’s staring at you

as taehyun turns around, he sees you talking to him but doesn’t really mind because he knows you’re his

but then he gets closer and hears the guy complimenting your body… he just pauses for a second, making brief eye contact w you and continuing to set up his little work out thing (i don’t work out can u tell)

he knows you’ll tell the guy why you’re actually here

“so… why don’t we go grab protein shakes after you finish working out?” you wanted to scream. you were wearing jeans. WHO WORKS OUT IN JEANS?? you hadn’t touched a single machine and you hate protein shakes. is this guy a dunce.

“oh no thank you, i’m here to watch my boyfriend. he’s right there,” you point at tae, who is now bench pressing over 100 pounds and woah.. hehe

yeah no the guy could not have left faster. tae still doesn’t say anything.

you keep watching him, now sitting on the floor until he gets up from the bench and sits in front of you

before you can ask, he gestures for you to hold his feet and starts doing sit ups

except, after the first one, he starts puckering his lips when he sits up

oh!

sit up after sit up, he kisses you as he comes back up

he literally did over one hundred and you were drunk on him by the time he finished

his way of staking his claim i suppose… probably made sure that the guy was watching too

tbh… that’s all the reaction you’re gonna get

after, you ask why he didn’t say anything and he just shrugs and is like, “i know you’re mine. and you know i’m yours. i don’t need to prove anything.”

then you’re like, “so why did you do the sit up thing”

“i was horny.” you literally choke on your smoothie

when you guys get home he definitely fucks you but not super roughly or anything… super romantically actually

his thought process, conscious or not, is: you could go out and fuck someone and they’d do it emotionlessly. he’s going to fuck you like you built the very universe your souls found each other in. (you did)

huening kai:

just a warning… he’s my bias so this might be a little crazy

you’re in a grocery store, he seems like one of those cringy bfs who’s steer the cart but have you in between him and the cart

i want him.

every few moments he’d press a kiss to your hair or simply lean down and have his face near yours until you got the hint

his chest is against your back… his huge broad chest… i’m ill.

OKAY LET ME GET TO THE ACTUAL JEALOUSY PART

okay so you guys stopped to look at the cereal because you wanted to get the one w his face

as you’re looking, hueningie squats down and checks the very bottom shelf

and thus, the worker that goes up to you does not see him

“hey! you need any help over here?” you look over, pointing to yourself in silent question. the guy nods. kai is immediately tuned into the convo as he pretends to look for more cereal

“hm? oh no! we’re good, just looking for a specific cereal,” you remain vague as to not reveal kai’s identity.

lol imagine you’re like “yeah my bf has a cereal w his face on it! yeah my bf who’s a famous idol!” LMFAOO

the guy nods, and you think the convo is over so you keep looking for cereal as you reach down and pet kai’s hair absentmindedly. you don’t know how reassuring it is to him.

“okay well… i just saw you and thought you were so super cute. like.. how do you not have a boyfriend?”

“i do actually,” you respond without evening looking at him. you tug kai’s hair, silently telling him to make himself known. he gets up, all six feet and muscles wearing a fitted top so you could see all of his strength and hard work as an idol.

“they’re not here,” he says plainly, without the usual sweet tone he’d give you. he also doesn’t even look at the worker.

the guy doesn’t even have enough time to apologize before kai’s leading you and the cart elsewhere. he gets quiet, but a different quiet to the other members. a sad one.

the moment you get home, he breaks down

he sobs, barely able to get out the fact that he doesn’t understand why you’re with him, why you wouldn’t want someone w a normal life, someone who’s more attractive (no such thing), someone who could love you publically

oh my baby :(((((

you pull him into a hug, his head ducking to be hidden in your neck, reassuring him quietly.

“huening… i promise you, you are the most attractive man on earth to me.” you say sternly, “the universe, even. it pains me that you can’t see that. i don’t want anyone else, just you, hyuka. and i love you enough to endure the fact that you can’t be public with us.”

he’s just whining now, not responding. he’s holding you so tightly that you’d think you’d turn into thin air.

after a lot of cuddles with his plushies, he’s okay :)

but then his members come home and see the tear stains on his face

they don’t know what happened and call him a baby and make a bunch of maknae jokes

yeah that’s the last straw. he takes you to his room and shoves you onto the bed (makes sure that not only are you comfy, but also that all his plushies are turned away)

he fucks you until you’ve both cum at least 4 times, and he’s borderline shooting blanks.

he’s moaning so loud, hips are shaking as he keeps pumping into you, filling you up

you’re even louder, legs shaking and hands pushing against his stomach in a faux plead for him to stop

every so often, he’d say something like, “not a fucking baby,” oh negative kai i want you.

“could a baby maknae fuck you like this? oh fuck honey, clench me like that. could that guy at the store make you shake like this? hm?

OH BROTHER!!

yeah neither of you can walk after that. and the members for SURE heard your moans and are now never calling him a baby ever again

unless he does aegyo bc come ON he’s baby then

probably becomes an inside joke between you guys

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[beomiracles]

HI HI! HAPPY 500!!! For this one I'm thinking about a Masochist!Soobin X Vampire!reader like reader is a bully to soobin bc she likes to see his cute reactions, who secretly likes him until reader got an idea that if she bites him what will be his reaction also reader is like a sadist for this one, when the blood moon appears thats when things get escalated aka spicy moment iykyk (congratulations for reaching 500! <33)

500 BASH SPECIAL

#serene adds ✎... I LOVE vampires. if anyone missed that vital piece of information ◟( ˃̶͈◡ ˂̶͈ )◞ and this idea was like gold? I fear the plot might be lacking a little? idk read and decide for yourself I say !

wc -> 1.6k

pairings soobin x vampire afab!reader (I can't remember if gender is stated but I wrote with a fem reader in mind) warnings elements bullying, blood drinking, masochist soobin (gets off on almost getting killed oopsies), handjob...I can't think of anything else its 2am, pls lmk if I missed any!

You liked Soobin. He smelled sweet, not like candy, no, you didn’t like candy. Soobin smelled like sweet nectar, carefully harvested from a blooming flower on a sunny spring day. His skin looked like honey and felt like gold beneath the tips of your fingers. — Soobin’s face flushed in all shades of pink and red whenever he got flustered. You liked making him like that, pushing his buttons just the right amount to get the perfect rise out of him. 

Soobin lets you push his buttons. He bows his head in shame as you empty the contents of his bag out on the floor in front of him. He bites his lip as you step on his books, crushing them under the sole of your shoe. He whines when you pull his ear, pushing him up against the nearest wall as you spit insults in his face. He never tells anyone. 

Soobin was perfect, too perfect for you to ever disregard as a quick meal. But his sweet smell remains engraved in your sharp mind, as if to torture you, and it did. 

It really was his own fault for being outside that one fateful night, the night of the blood moon. Tsk, humans never seemed to know better. You had never intended to take things that far, but under the red sky your eyes saw nothing but him, smelled nothing but him, felt nothing but him. 

The persistent beating of his heart as he walks along the sidewalk. His head hung low, the hood of his shirt shielding his pretty face from view. — It happens before you have the time to even think. He’s tall, but you’re strong; his lanky and unguarded frame was easy to yank into the nearest alleway. He doesn’t scream, and even if he did no one would’ve heard for your hand slams across his plump lips. 

His once startled and almost terrified expression wears off the second he sees your face. You frown but don’t give it much thought, his sweet nectar-like scent spreading like wildfire through your every fiber and you inhale, letting your eyes flutter closed. — “Stupid boy”, you mutter as you yank the hood of his hoodie down. “Don’t you know not to go out wandering by yourself late at night?” 

Your hand moves to his neck, giving it a firm squeeze as you watch his lips part in a soft gasp, the sound like music to your ears. “K-Knew you would come for me”, he croaks out, his cheeks flushing as his tongue darts out to swipe across his bottom lip. His statement catches you off guard and you peer up at him, red irises piercing through his honey tinted ones. It is then you realize that his heart is not beating out of fear, rather…excitement. 

Oh you’ve got to be kidding me. 

Still, he was rather cute. You could feel him swallow, adam's apple bobbing against the palm of your hand, the pumping of his rich blood flowing through his healthy veins that strained beneath your fingers. You exhale, not because your unbeating heart needed to, but rather to restrain yourself from just snapping his neck in half. 

“Why, have you been waiting, hm?” You drawl, sharp nails dragging across his jugular and he shudders as he nods. “Do you desire death?” You weren’t planning on killing him. He didn’t have to know that.  — He shakes his head as best as he can, his breath is reduced to short gasps as he fights for air, fights for life. “You.” His voice is raspy and you still as your eyes bore into him. 

“You. Is what I desire”, he gasps as your hands tighten around his neck. “Stupid boy”, you grunt. Did he not realize how hard he was making things, how dangerous he made them? Despite it all, you lean in, your nose grazing along his honey fresh skin, his blood surges beneath the surface and your eyes gleam in the eerie moonlight. 

Soobin lets out a strangled noise when your fangs sink into his skin, showing no mercy as they dig deep. Your eyes flutter closed and you groan at the taste of him, sweet nectar dancing on your tongue as you greedily let the searing hot liquid slip down your throat. — Just as you’ve gotten your first taste of him you realize that you can never let yourself do this again, that was if he even survived tonight. You were no stranger to human blood, especially not fresh from the core. But this, his blood, you felt your self control slipping between your fingers as his warm blood bloomed inside your cold body. 

His large hands are on your waist, you expect him to push you away, he doesn’t. He pulls you closer, whimpering as your thigh presses against his hard cock. It makes your eyes snap open and you rip yourself from his throat as you slam him even harder against the brick wall behind him, he groans as his mouth falls open. 

Your lips, coated in a thick layer of crimson turn into a scowl as you grip his chin harshly. “Sick human”, you sneer as you watch his already blushing cheeks practically explode in an ocean of red. “Do you get off on this shit?” You jeer as you watch him with disdain. The way his cock twitches against your thigh makes your nose turn up in disgust, “fuck, and I thought I was the bigger freak.” 

The way he writhers under you was almost endearing. A small noise deep in his throat pulls your eyes to his, only to find them full of desire. It wasn’t like you didn’t like Soobin, hell you liked him a lot, it had been centuries since you last felt something other than thirst for a lowly human like himself. It was why you hadn’t strayed far from him, not wanting his sweet nectar to attract others of your kind, creatures far more dangerous than yourself, creatures who most definitely wouldn’t hesitate to drain him dry. 

You heave a sigh, the grip on his chin unwavering as your free hand slides along his chest and down his pants. Soobin lets out a hoarse moan as your pale fingers wrap around his leaking cock, you grimace at how wet it was. Can’t believe I’m doing this. You mutter as you glance over at him. 

His face had quickly contorted into one of pure pleasure as his brows drew together, his ever pouty lips parted, his jaw slack and his gaze clouded. The sight was oddly enticing and you felt yourself tingle with arousal. — Hungry eyes travel down his neck, the punctures to his skin glinting in the moonlight as blood spills down his collarbone. Deeming your self control to be out of the picture already, you dive back in as your fangs re-pierce his throat. 

The taste was just as sweet as before, perhaps even sweeter as Soobin’s whines and moans echoed out in the alleway. Your thumb pressing down against his slit makes him squeal and you can practically feel his blood surging, his pleasure transpiring directly into your mouth as you swallow mouthfuls of his very life essence. 

His hips buck up against your hand, chasing your touch as his fingers dig into the skin of your waist. He was surprisingly strong for a human, the acknowledgment spurred you on further than you’d like to admit and you sighed against his neck. 

You could feel his tall frame grow weaker and weaker in your grasp, whether it was because of the lack of blood he suffered or his nearing orgasm, you didn’t know. “Please”, he gasps as his head falls back against the bricked wall. Humans and their persistent begging, half the time they didn’t even know what they wanted, yet they were rarely pleased. 

It takes all your willpower to finally withdraw from his throat and he hisses as you do. “Please, please, please”, he whimpers when your tongue drags across the wounds on his neck, savoring the last droplets of  sweet nectar. — Your wrists flicks over the head of his cock, pulling a cry from him as his teeth sink into his bottom lip. “What?” You groan as you tug on his weeping dick, making him shudder as he shakes his head. 

“Need more..” he pleads as his hopeful eyes meet yours. You snort as you pull his face by his chin, forcing him down eye level with you. “Take what you’re offered”, you sneer before releasing his face with a push. He whines as his back hits the wall behind him, “wanna kiss you.” — You were seriously starting to consider the option of snapping his neck after all. 

“Stupid human–” You begin but the rest of your sentence is swallowed by his lips on your own as Soobin’s large hand guides the back of your head. His blood on your lips mingles with his saliva as he pushes his eager tongue inside your mouth. With a small roll of your eyes you let them flutter closed as your lips move against his. 

The second he feels your sharp fang grace his tongue he comes undone as he whimpers into your mouth. His cock twitches in your tight grasp as he coats your pale hand in hot cum. “F-fuck”, he whines as he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. The rapid beating of his heart consumed your senses and you felt yourself go lightheaded. 

He pulls back, just enough to where his lips still hover above yours, smeared in his own blood and he pants. He swallows, hard, “I wanna taste you too”, he states and your mouth parts as you huff out a short breath of disbelief. 

Jesus fucking christ.  

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[anonymousewrites]

One Hell of a Love (Book 3) Chapter Seven

Sebastian Michaelis x Demon! Reader

Chapter Seven: One Hell of a Celebration

Summary: It's the night before the Cricket Tournament, but a celebration just means more work (and bothers) for (Y/N) and Sebastian.

            “My, how handsome you look tonight, Mr. Noir,” said Sebastian playfully as (Y/N) entered the hall hosting the June third celebration of the Interhouse Cricket Tournament.

            (Y/N) smirked. “Thank you, Mr. Michaelis. You look quite dashing yourself.”

            They both wore their housemaster uniforms, but (Y/N) had traded their robes for some embroidery at the ends, and their suit vest was more decorative than usual. Sebatian had traded his cross for a more decorative one—the most ironic change a demon could make.

            “Now, shall we take our places for the opening speech?” said Sebastian.

            “We shall,” said (Y/N).

            They walked to their spots at the front of the crowd with their fellow housemasters, each itching to reach out and hold the other’s hand. On the dais before them, Agares stood and looked out over the crowd. He cleared his throat, and all of the guests quieted. This was the one event where outsiders could come to the college, and so there were a variety of people—family and highly connected businessmen—milling about in formal attire (fortunately, (Y/N) and Sebastian had yet to bump into the Midfords or anyone else who might notice them).

            “I do beg your pardon for interrupting your conversations, ladies and gentlemen,” said Agares. “Hello, everyone. I welcome you all and thank you for attending the opening ceremony of our storied Fourth of June Cricket Tournament. I am delighted to once again be able to hold the tournament this year. Please enjoy the festivities this tournament’s eve.” He cleared his throat. “Now then…” He threw out a hand dramatically. “Team representatives of each house, come forth!”

            The sound of heavy marching approaching the doors of the hall, and the crowd gasped.

            “What’s going on?!”

            “The floor, it’s shaking?!”

            The doors flung wide open.

            “Here they come!” cried the younger students. “Their overwhelming physical prowess and teamwork are second to none!”

            “Absolute champions, top of the world—the Green Lions!”

            Each member of Green house wore gleaming armor and green tunics. A cap fluttered over Greenhill’s shoulders, and he carried a torch. Edward and other members of the house carried Green Lion flags. Everyone was serious and carried themselves nobly.

            “Big brother! You look so handsome!” cheered a familiarly bubbly voice from within the crowd, and (Y/N) and Sebastian smothered chuckles as Edward’s face turned red in embarrassment.

            “I remember wearing armor like that,” said (Y/N). They sighed. “Awfully cumbersome. Not my style at all.”

            Sebatian chuckled.

            A moment after Green House took their places in the hall, rose petals flew through the air. The crowd gasped, and the women began whispering.

            “Look!” exclaimed students. “It’s the second-place house that drove Green House into a corner last year! Captivating spectators with their elegant plays!”

            “Brillian Eden, garden of fine plays—the Scarlet Foxes!”

            Dressed in kingly regalia, the Red House entered. Holding a candelabra in one hand and a rose in the other, Redmond entered with a smirk. Scarlet robes draped over ornate clothing, and behind him, the members of his house smiled sweetly at the crowd with roses and banners raised high. They looked every bit the lords they one day would be. As they passed through the crowd, women swooned, and various house members kissed hands and greeted all who saw them in a gentlemanly, albeit flirtatious, manner.

            “I once wore such clothing,” said Sebastian fondly. “I was able to order others around to my heart’s content, and I played my role well.”

            “What type of contract asked for that?” said (Y/N), raising a brow.

            “An ambitious woman looked to take a throne for herself and needed someone to act as king,” said Sebastian.

            (Y/N) smirked slightly at the idea of the power imbalance that usually kept women from advancing in society as they wished to turn on its head. That was their favorite type of contract.

            Sebastian was pleased to see (Y/N)’s approval of his contract. They were both unique in having personal principles over the types of contracts they took, so it wasn’t strange to compare why they had taken certain masters over the years.

            Fwoosh!

            The lights of the hall went out, and everyone jumped. In the empty doorway, a single torch lit, and the flame danced in the darkness. Smoke filtered into the room.

            “Could this be?!” exclaimed shaky voices. “The house team they say throws their opponents into confusion with unpredictable trick plays?”

            “The swarming specters of the ghost legion—the Violet Wolves!”

            From the middle of the crowd, Purple House appeared. Everyone jumped as the figures, cloaked in black and carrying lanterns carved into skulls, moved among them.

            “Very sorcerer-like,” said Sebastian. “Or should I say witch?” He smirked.

            (Y/N) tutted and shook their head, not dignifying that with a response.

            “They’re at their tricks from the start, what with not coming in through the doors…” said a few frightened patrons.

            Fwee!

            Everyone looked up as the lights were lit once more and owls soared into the hall.

            “Those birds are…”

            “That house, is it?”

            “Though their physical strength may leave much to be desired, they aim for an opportunity to win the championship with their strategic game plans…”

            “Attack of the cornered rats, God only knows—the Sapphire Owls.”

            Blue House stepped into the hall. Each wore long blue robes and carried an owl perched on their arm. Scholarly caps rested on their head, and Bluewer held a staff with a lantern atop it.

            Everyone clapped as they passed, but after the tepid introduction, the arrival felt somewhat unimpressive (though, what did they expect as the house that came last every year?).

            “Ciel! You look absolutely charming! Give it your best!” cheered Elizabeth.

            Ciel blushed, and (Y/N) and Sebastian chuckled.

            After all the houses took their places, the P4 stepped up to a large firepit, each holding their lantern, candle, or torch.

            “Now!” Agares raised his hand. “Light the flame of Saint George!”

            “We the players—” began Greenhill.

            “—in accordance with the great tradition of Weston College—” continued Bluewer.

            “—shall fight fair and square until the very end—” added Redmond.

            “—this we do solemnly swear,” finished Violet.

            The large cup lit on fire, and the flames curled up into the air. Everyone cheered and clapped, and the players whooped.

            “Now, I do hereby declare open the Interhouse Cricket Tournament of 1889!” announced Agares. “Tomorrow will surely be a day of fierce battles. So please enjoy this evening’s opening festivities to your heart’s content.”

            The crowd applauded as Agares walked off the dais. The instant he stepped onto the stairs, he tripped and tumbled down. The crowd gasped.

            “Vice Headmaster?!” cried another housemaster.

            “Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me,” said Agares, standing.

            Sebastian frowned. Once again, the vice principal had fallen and acted strangely.

            However, the party began to really grow into a proper celebration. Purple House crowded around a table, and people fearfully avoided them. Green House eagerly ate to gain strength for the coming day. Red House instantly mingled with the crowd—mostly eager women.

            “Hmph, what a very relaxed bunch,” said Bluewer. “Blue House, we will hold a meeting to perfect our strategy. We cannot afford to waste even a minute.”

            “Understood!” said Blue House.

            “Don’t be such a bore.” A woman put her hand on Bluewer’s shoulder. “Let down your hair a bit, why don’t you?”

            Bluewer jumped as seven women, a few older and a few younger, surrounded him. “Big sister?”

            “Let your hair down, let your hand down!” chanted two younger girls.

            “Look at you acting all high and mighty when you’re the exact opposite at home,” teased another sister.

            “The little boy who would always play house with me has grown up to be a prefect. How perfectly novel!” laughed another woman.

            “Big sister!” Poor Bluewer was red with embarrassment. “Please stop with the unnecessary commentary and go over there, would you?”

            “ ‘Unnecessary?!’ ” exclaimed another sister. “How dare you?!”

            “Ah, how do you do, everyone?” said a sister, smiling kindly. “Thank you for treating our little brother kindly.”

            “Big brother, where’s Lord Edgar?” chirped another girl.

            The entire picture of Bluewer trying to fend off his seven sisters was quite entertaining, and the Sapphire Owl house members were fighting not to chuckle at their prefect.

            (Y/N) and Sebastian smirked in amusement before speaking to the guests around them, mingling like model housemasters. Sebastian was irked by the several women who flirted with (Y/N). To the women, they were the ideal husband—attractive, intelligent, and gentile. Sebastian, too, was experiencing his fair amount of advances, but he was not paying them any mind and was instead busy to ensuring that any private conversation women attempted to have with (Y/N) was interrupted. What could Sebastian say? He was a jealous lover.

            “You seem quite intent on interrupting my discussions, Mr. Michaelis,” said (Y/N), smirking as they were drawn away from yet another unmarried lady.

            “I’m sure it was hardly stimulating conversation, Mr. Noir,” said Sebastian, raising a brow.

            (Y/N) tutted and shook their head in amusement, knowing full well they’d use this emotion to their benefit later—when they had privacy.

            Speaking of jealousy, Ciel had been cornered by a few of Bluewer’s sisters, who were analyzing his position as a potential suitor, and Elizabeth had immediately interceded.

            “Pleased to make your acquaintance, everyone!” she said formally, if not forcefully. “I am Ciel’s bride-to-be, Elizabeth.”

            Edward lunged and throttled poor Ciel for daring to hurt his sister’s feelings.

            “Blue House is boisterous as always,” chuckled Redmond.

            “Ciel! That strange house looks good on you!” laughed Soma.

            “I still can’t believe you were chosen to play for your house,” said Ciel.

            “Naturally!” said Soma.

            “Kadar is a deft hand at cricket, you know,” said Harcourt, smiling.

            “Cricket, introduced by the British, is all the rage in India,” said Soma. “Why, I even assembled my own team at the royal palace.”

            “Ah, Lord Edgar!” said one of Bluewer’s sisters. “How long must I wait before you ask me to dance?!”

            “Perhaps such time as you stop trampling on my feet?” teased Redmond kindly.

            “You are so cruel!” exclaimed the sister.

            “What foul words to fling at a fair lady, Edgar!”

            (Y/N) and Sebastian froze at the voice, and Ciel went blank in shock.

            Viscount Druitt stood in the middle of the crowd, and all eyes were immediately on him. Women stared with hearts in the eyes, and Druitt smiled out at everyone.

            “Ah, Viscount Druitt!” cheered the women.

            “How is he everywhere?” groaned (Y/N).

            “He is quite well-known,” sighed Sebastian.

            “Have my teachers escaped you, dear nephew?” bemoaned Druitt.

            “Uncle Aleister,” greeted Redmond with a smile.

            “Non!” said Druitt. “Do not call me uncle!” Undoubtedly, it made him feel old.

            “That explains the similarities of their appearances,” said Sebastian, raising a brow.

            “Ah! My beloved alma mater! The fresh springtime of my youth, like roses moist with morning dew, washes over me as if it were only yesterday!” As per usual, Druitt waxed poetry, and people adored it.

            “Luckily, his nephew is suspicious but not nearly as creepy,” muttered (Y/N). “Speaking of which, I’m going to leave before I get spotted—”

            “Ah!” Druitt’s eyes landed on them.

            Damn, why is it always me?

            “You, sir! What a face!” Druitt ran towards them and took their hand in his. “Truly, you may be a dashing man, but you have the grace of the feminine form! What an entrancing combination! Truly, a mysterious beauty worthy of a poet’s praise!”

            Even when I’m presenting masculine… sighed (Y/N). “What a…compliment, sir,” they forced out, shaking Druitt’s hand.

            Proud of himself, Druitt turned away to address the women beginning to gather around him.

            “Every time,” sighed (Y/N) as they drifted back to Sebastian’s side.

            Sebastian chuckled. He knew damn well Druitt had no chance of getting close to (Y/N), so, although his possessiveness had once again been piqued, he was also fairly amused by the endless compliments Druitt seemed to have for (Y/N), no matter the disguise.

            “There is quite a troublesome group gathering, indeed,” said Sebastian. Between Soma and the Midfords all in one place, it wouldn’t be wise to stay around. “Let us keep our distance.”

            “I daresay I agree with you,” said (Y/N), nodding.

            The pair turned away. The instant they did, a hand landed on each of their shoulders, and they froze. Turning, they faced one of the only human faces that could inspire any sort of twinge of trepidation—Marchioness Francis Midford.

            “You there, indecent manservant and maid, what brings you here?” she snapped.

            Of course she caught us, thought (Y/N) and Sebastian.

            “Goodness me, Marchioness Midford…” said Sebastian.

            “Good evening, Marchioness…” said (Y/N).

            “Look at you two!” she exclaimed. She grabbed Sebastian’s hair, and he stared at her in shock and a bit of surprised fright at a human being so forceful. “What housemaster in his right mind would go around in so dissipated a guise as this?” She turned her ire on (Y/N), and they coughed and stepped back quickly. ��And you, what maid goes about dressed so?” She narrowed her eyes. “Hmph. No matter.” Francis put her hands on her hips and regarded them carefully. “iF you two are here and disguised so, then that must mean that Ciel’s enrollment at Weston is…”

            Sebastian bowed. “It is as you suspect, my lady.”

            “I do hope you can overlook my appearance due to the situation,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “Hmph,” said Francis. That was all the acknowledgement they’d get.

            Elizabeth noticed Francis talking to the pair, and she blinked. “Oh? Why, if it isn’t (Y/N)—”

            “Ssh,” said (Y/N), winking and pressing a finger to their lips. Sebastian smirked.

            Elizabeth got the message and quieted instantly, but Edward and Alexis had already noticed the discussion going on.

            “Oh, who are these chaps, Mother?” asked Edward, staring as blankly as his father. “Sirs, are you acquainted with my mother?”

            “Oh, really now, you two!” said Elizabeth. “Those tutors are…” She whispered to them, and Edward and Alexis stared.

            “It has been quite a while, gentlemen,” greeted Sebastian.

            “A fine evening, isn’t it?” remarked (Y/N), smiling.

            “Ooh,” said Alexis. “I didn’t realize at all.”

            “Me neither,” agreed Edward.

            “You mean you actually hadn’t noticed and weren’t keeping quiet about this the whole time?!” exclaimed Ciel.

            “Edward Midford, you are in one of my classes,” sighed (Y/N), pinching the bridge of their nose. Apparently, it was the women in that family that were observant.

            Edward shrugged. “I didn’t look to closely.” He beamed. “And when Lizzie’s around, everyone else fades into the background, don’t they?”

            “Don’t come out and say that like it’s some kind of given,” sighed Ciel.

            “Does your work have anything to do with tomorrow’s matches?” asked Edward. Apparently, Ciel’s presence at Weston College had at least piqued some alarm.

            “Can’t say it doesn’t, but you can have at it without worrying about that,” said Ciel.

            “Then that’s just what I’ll be doing,” said Edward with a competitive grin.

            “I’ll cheer my heart out for you, so make sure you come back victorious!” said Elizabeth, hugging Ciel.

            “R-Right,” said Ciel. After seeing her kill hordes of bizarre dolls, he was still amazed by her usual personality.

            “You talk as if the perennially last place Blue House has even a hope of winning!” snapped Edward, huffing over Elizabeth cheering for Ciel.

            “Oh, but it does.” Alexis smiled. “Blue House did once win the tournament a long time ago.”

            “Are you perhaps talking about the Miracle of Sapphires?!” A redheaded young boy ran up to the group, and Ciel jumped. He shook Alexis’s hand brightly and introduced himself. “I’m McMillan, Phantomhive’s best friend!” Ciel blinked at that. “Oh, won’t you tell us the story, Marquess?!”

            “I doubt Soma would be pleased to hear his place taken,” tutted (Y/N) in amusement, and Sebastian smirked.

            “Very well, young man!” said Alexis. “It was back when I too resided in Green House and was the prefect’s drudge, just like Ed.”

            He dove into the Miracle of Sapphires, telling of how Diedrich, a Baron from Germany and the prefect of Green House in that time, was angry at Vincent Phantomhive, the prefect of Bue House at that time, for not making any preparations for the cricket tournament. The two ended up in a dispute that was more Diedrich upset than Vincent being at all concerned, but a feud began nonetheless, and they made a bet. If Diedrich and Green House won the tournament, then Vincent would have to renounce his position as prefect. If Vincent and Blue House won, then Vincent would a single mystery order for Diedrich to follow. The bet was set, and everyone expected Blue House to be beaten as usual and for Vincent to be humiliated.

            But that was not what happened. Once the tournament had ended, Sapphire Owl House was victorious, and Vincent had won the bet.

            “And Vincent and Diedrich became quite close business partners ever since!” finished Alexis, beaming. Everyone stared in surprise for various reasons.

            “Ah, business partners,” said (Y/N), knowing that meant the Guard Dog of the Queen had his connections in Germany.

            “The-The previous Earl was in Blue House?” said Ciel, blinking. He clearly hadn’t ever known it and wasn’t sure what to think.

            “I can’t believe your dad was the key player in the Miracle of Sapphires!” cried McMillan.

            “Ah, you didn’t know, hm, Ciel?” Alexis’s smile turned melancholy at how much Ciel had never learned of his father due to his death.

            “Father was a drudge…?” said Elizabeth.

            “He’s younger than Uncle Vincent…?” said Edward.

            Ignoring the insults from his children, Alexis smiled and put his hands on Ciel’s shoulders. “It was truly a brilliant game. It pains me to say this, but we were utterly clobbered. You have the blood of a genius game strategist in your veins. Have faith in yourself and give it your best.

            “Oh!” exclaimed Soma, noticing Agares approaching the dais again. “Something’s about to begin.”

            “Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for waiting,” he said. “We will not draw lots to decide the tournament fixtures.” Agares gestured to Clayton. “You there, lend me your hat.” He took the scholarly hat—(Y/N)’s nose twitched at him not using his own; it felt off—and dropped two pairs of tokens into the hat. “Now, then, head housemasters, come forward and draw lots.” All four housemasters put their hands into the cap.

            Ciel and (Y/N) smirked as Sebastian dipped his hand in. They knew he’d get just the token they needed for their strategy to work perfectly. After all, the game had already begun. What use had they for miracle wins when they had tricks? Miracles were a thing of Heaven; tricks were a thing of Hell.

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[nalyra-dreaming]

Hello! Interested in your encyclopaedic knowledge on this. Skim-rereading the VC now for first time since I was a teenager and have to ask - does Louis ever, like - do anything for Lestat? This prompted particularly by TOTBT which my god is so savage. I can’t believe he’s happy to just… let him die?!? He doesn’t lift a finger, he doesn’t even try to protect him? It’s IWTV all over again, only supposedly their relationship is much better by this point.

It got me looking for examples where Louis does anything whatsoever proactive for Lestat and I’m really struggling. At the end of QotD, it seems like lots of the other vamps are trying to look after traumatised Lestat a bit, but I don’t think Louis comes to him? He just wanders off to New Orleans? Maybe I’ve missed a bit though. He looks after him a bit in his coma? Although not moreso than anyone else. But in the end it is Lestat who ends up waking up to save Louis. Even that bit in PLaTRoA where Lestat is about to have his heart stopped - Louis sitting next to his coffin - but Lestat reaches out to take Louis’ hand, not the other way round. Aside from verbally saying that he loves him, other than being generally nice and calm and polite, does Louis ever do anything to show it?

Hey nonny!

(Not sure about the encyclopedic but I‘ll try 😅💕) I do see a lot of the mentioned events a bit differently, allow me to explain (this is gonna be long^^):

Soooo to address your mention of TtotBT first off, I personally do think Louis thought of Lestat first and foremost when he sent him away in that scene.

Louis was tempted. It's no surprise imho that Jacob really wants to do that scene with Sam, because the power dynamics are inverted of course, but it is also emotionally very raw.

I want to pause here and recall a quote from QotD here, which is important:

Louis, the watcher, the patient one, was there on account of love pure and simple. The two had found each other only last night, and theirs had been an extraordinary reunion. Louis would go where Lestat led him. Louis would perish if Lestat perished. But their fears and hopes for this night were heartbreakingly human.

Louis... would perish if Lestat perished.

For Louis to send Lestat away... is to resign himself to death also. I think that has to be taken into account for the scene you mentioned, where Louis decides that Lestat deserves to save his soul, before Louis himself deserves to save his own. His rejection of Lestat there is done in full knowledge that he condemns himself there to a very lonely, cold, and ultimately fatal existence. He rejects Lestat there, knowing he will lose his greatest love.

I wouldn't call that happy to let him die? And I, personally, don't see it as a parallel to IWTV either, though it might feel a bit like that for Lestat, but the Louis here knows how much this will hurt. He knows what he is doing. He is condemning himself, hoping it will free Lestat.

And, while we're on TtotBT, in the beginning of the book there is the mention of Louis coming by Lestat's, to 'Netflix & chill', to share space and spend time, watch movies (for example "Company of the wolves", just being there. Talk. Discuss. Being together. So Louis did come by, for Lestat. And Lestat visited Louis, in his shack, had his own chair there. They were in each other's lives.

And... in the end of that book - when David show's up? What does Louis do? He takes David in. Makes room for David in their old home in Rue Royale. Accepts David - for Lestat. Accompanies them, too. Honestly, given David is David... that is a HUGE sacrifice! He let's David, the new fledgling, into their home. Because he is Lestat's. Later on, in PL, he will do the same for Antoine, which is obviously something that had to grate quite a lot as well, and I have always seen that as a rather conscious decision to allow it. To allow Antoine into their lives, because he is Lestat's.

Louis also tries to protect Lestat before the concert.

I know a lot of people read that from Lestat's POV and are just happy with the reunion (and of course it is beautiful and I really want to see it on the show!!) but... it's not only that.

Louis comes, to Lestat, not only because he can do so. But he pleads for Lestat to stay safe, too, to not do the concert. Because he is afraid for Lestat. He wants to keep him safe, wants to keep him with himself, too. He pleads with him not to go on stage. Offers to talk, to make plans, to 'Let us have each other in this century the way we never did in the past'.

You mentioned the end of QotD, and... in their universe, all that happens right after this reunion. A few days, a week at most. And then Lestat hides himself away again, in a room, trying to cope. Because he has been used again, abused, too, in a way he himself can only cope with by reframing it as love.

Louis knows it isn't. Wasn't. And he knows that he and Lestat cannot talk freely with the others there. He and Lestat are not able to use the mind gift directly. And... he is deeply unsettled by Jesse's report, the report she gives Lestat. Claudia's ghost. Deeply, deeply personal and something they share, very painfully. They go by Louis' tombstone, and then they can talk. A bit. Louis trusts Lestat and in his new powers. Falls asleep in his arms.

And that... is a rather powerful statement.

Louis (admittedly begrudgingly) enters that "adventure" with Lestat, fully trusting in Lestat. Kissing, embracing. Sleeping in his arms. It's a statement.

A statement that, despite Lestat feeling changed, and alien, that Louis still trusts him. Trusts in him, too.

And it is Louis, who tries to take Lestat home in Memnoch, Louis who pleads, begs for Lestat to be released. Louis who cries out when Lestat is locked up. Louis is the one who saves the books, Louis is the one who tries to comfort Lestat. Louis is the one who holds the proverbial fort at Rue Royale, with David, for long, long years. Louis is the one who despairs, eventually, when Lestat goes back into that half-awake coma, his soul taken away by angels.

Though there is more to that, too. You say Louis did not look after Lestat more than others, and I'd beg to differ. Louis was the one in the chapel, guarding Lestat. Holding his ground with the ancients, and the riff raff that Armand hunted down (even once with Lestat later). Louis is the one who keeps Ruy Royale, and makes sure Lestat is kept clean during his episodes of stillness, and it is only when he breaks, eventually, when Merrick takes his focus... that that... stops. When the Merrick events start, David visits Lestat, and Louis is 'there, seated on the marble beside Lestat, reading in a hushed voice from an old book of English poetry'.

Louis never leaves Lestat's side for long. Armand notes how he seems emaciated, hungry when Armand comes by in his version of the tale.

It is only when Merrick's spell unfolds that Louis leaves Lestat's side, that his focus shifts. And with the shift to Claudia and her ghost... the despair takes hold.

And it is when Louis heartbeat stops - that the "angels" lose their blackmailing material.

Lestat later tells of how he was forced to do "their bidding" by them threatening to take the eye... and though he doesn't elaborate... it is very clear what that means wrt Louis.

Because there simply was nothing else they could threaten him with anymore. Nothing else was more important than Louis. Not his eye, not his soul.

This always sends a shiver down my spine.

But that just as a note.

Louis is the one who accepts Lestat's judgment, after Merrick's creation.

He also accepts Lestat abandoning New Orleans, eventually, because Lestat cannot stand it anymore to kill the riff raff, those who "offend Armand", something Lestat calls "autocratic, ruthless" wrt to Armand's killing of them.

Louis accepts Lestat's decision there, and goes to Armand. Something that Lestat in turn accepts and supports(!):

My beloved Louis de Pointe du Lac left soon after, and from that time on lived in New York with Armand. Armand keeps the island of Manhattan safe for them—Louis, Armand, and two young blood drinkers, Benjamin and Sybelle, and whoever else joins them in their palatial digs on the Upper East Side.

And when Lestat is finally ready, it is Louis who apologizes to Lestat for the "past" by hunting a woman who wanted to murder her husband - in front of Lestat.

Personally, I find that a very poignant "doing-it-for-someone" :)))

But there is more.

Louis is the one who rescues Rose! Rose, Lestat's charge. Louis knows about Rose. Lestat's lawyers know about Louis. Louis takes over when Lestat is unreachable.

There is so much in these simple facts!

Like, they must have talked about Rose. Louis knows about Rose, knows she is important to Lestat, he takes the responsibility, saves her from fire, kills the ones who harmed her. Brings her to him. And he is the one Lestat's lawyers reach out to when Lestat is gone? Unreachable? What a statement is that in and by itself?! Louis is the one Lestat trusts with that child, the girl he saved and who will become his immortal daughter. Their immortal daughter.

And then, when Rhosh is there in NYC, at that table, and the axe scene happens... what does Louis do?

He smiles.

Now I don't know if you know that scene well, but it is quite the scene, and I honestly cannot wait to see it on the show.

And Louis... smiles. Shows support.

Quiet. Steadfast. The support Lestat needs, probably more than he consciously realizes.

And then, of course, later on - knowing what "Lestat cannot confide". They are finally sharing blood again, and Louis becomes Lestat's confidant. To all the things Lestat cannot speak about, all the things he has hinted at but cannot put into words. All the things that are too heavy to address.

That is no trifle.

And the silver cord, where Louis pushes the matter against Lestat's (not) better judgement. Where Louis is there, for Lestat to reach out.

Your ask made it seem (a bit) as if being there and offering is not sufficient, but strength shows itself in very different ways. Lestat is more direct, "flashy". Louis' strength is more subtle, it is an offer for support, unwavering support, whenever Lestat wants it. For as long as Lestat wants it. Not taking agency from Lestat, which is like the worst thing that could happen again... because that is something that has been taken from Lestat again, and again, and again. And Louis knows that.

And so he doesn't.

He doesn't take. He offers. It shows he knows Lestat. And he accepts him, and their respective pasts, and all the shit that has happened.

Again, that is no trifle, imho.

There is more. Little mentions, in the books.

A "grotto" they once shared. For example. Louis wearing the clothes Lestat chooses.

But for the most part you have to "read between the lines" as Lestat says, for the juicy details - however, I think when you consider the arcs? The arcs that span all the books?

The things we are told actually speak for themselves, imho.

Louis does a lot of things for Lestat. The important things, actually.

He is there for Lestat to turn to when Lestat's strength fails.

And yes, that includes the rejection in TtotBT - because Louis thought he had to be the one to show the strength for Lestat - to hold fast to the initial belief. The initial hope that drove the body switch - because Lestat had just found out he could not die anymore. Even if he tried. And he had tried. And it had sent him spiraling.

Would Louis have held out indefinitely? Probably not :) But that's another discussion.

[blorbingqls]

"We accept the love we think we deserve" - seeing this quote in terms of love and control as subjects in Only Friends

With @tomatoland 's brilliant post on TopMew on the above quote here , i think that with 7 eps in, we have understood that love and control are very well linked with ephemerality as a subject.

As i have previously linked epheremality with control here, i would like to talk about how love also makes us lose control with the impermanence of life. This is a long overdue post for 4 eps now.

linking the ephemerality squad here so that you can also share your opinions on this @waitmyturtles @lurkingshan @slayerkitty @respectthepetty @ranchthoughts (anyone else i am missing, pls tag, i really appreciate it)

TopMew

As Tomato (@tomatoland i hope you're okay with that nickname; i really tried to find a name on your blog for you) has referred in their post, Mew left his bubble of insecurities and got his heart broken. Completely legible and correct on his point. Top really loves Mew but now Mew has no reason to believe him anymore. With the play in their power dynamics, both of them loved each other and lost control of the way they wanted the relationship. Yes, if Top and Mew has stuck to their original plans - just reaching to the point of ideality and sex, then, this relationship should have ended after they got their goals. I dont think that sex was a goal for Mew as much as it was for Top, but, we can say it was in the secondary.

But as they fell in love, they, especially Top understood how the love he received from Mew is so much more than he thought he deserves (taking into account his trauma and past experiences). So , even though Mew is projecting his hurt by doing things that literally are asshole-ish as fuck on his accord, Top is willing to let go all of that since even he knows he is in the wrong this time and he is willing to lose all control he has on his life - of fame, money and insecurities in order to have Mew back. Top is willing to be as obsessive as Mew said he would be in a relationship in order to get and accept the love he think he deserves from Mew, even if it won't be good.

But, I also feel, the concept of love as explored in the series so far, not just runs along with TopMew because of the books, but also with all the remaining couples in the show. I won't discuss P'Yo and her partner, CheumApril in this segment, because I want more angles on this from the coming episodes in order to validate my point. But, I'll discuss this point with our other views on the couples: RayMew, TopBoston, SandRay, and BostonNick.

RayMew

Now, RayMew is a pairing that is being enforced on the viewers for the past 3 episodes now and the last episode shows a pretty good view of how as characters, Mew and Ray view each other.

For Ray, his love is unconditional for Mew because it correlates with that fact that Mew was the only reason who made him stay in this world - who made him believe that he deserves the love from his friends, the love which he didn't get from his parents or any potential partners. But potential partners were never in the scene because Mew was Ray's emergency contact. Their relationship runs deep and however much you may think, even if Ray thinks Mew's love for him could be more as a friend, he also believes that because as he is so damn shitty and a fucking burden to society, he can't ask for more from Mew for the sake of their friendship and his esteem. He keeps entertaining the idea of them as partners several times, but, until ep 7, Mew has never entertained the idea that his love for Ray will be any worthy of more than a friend. Because, Mew wants to continue making the boundary and keep the control, according to me.

Now, as Mew has entertained the idea, i am interested how it pans out in the next episode (not very promising tho). just linking this out here because its so fucking interesting.

TopBoston

We will mainly take here Boston's viewpoint since Top gave up on this since the very beginning and became firm with it post ep 3. He gives no flying fucks about the possiblity of it. Top considers Boston to be a one night stand and a one night stand only.

Boston, as has mentioned so many times, considers Top to be top tier; the person who gives him something as close to love because as an Machiavellian prince (refer here) Boston considers Top to be the only worthy competitor in his reign. And he really doesn't care if he hurt others feeling. Mind you, Boston has been the most truthful to himself, maybe not to others. And as a prince, his love speaks volume through keeping them in their reign because ultimately Boston wants power and control in his arena. That's the fucking politics of it. And Top is the only worthy contender who can damage his reign. Hence, he wants the top tier power as much as possible, and only Top can give him that. Him fucking off to America, that can easily happen through Top, because he is a very well known hotel chain owner/manager. So, Boston wants his loves, because he very well thinks he deserves it and he accepts it as much as he can. But, he also knows that for him, he can't make this love into a weakness, because that will be out of his control.

Boston however, as Mew so incredibly pointed out, is gullible. Ray couldn't see through him, but, MEW FUCKING DID. That is why even though Boston didn't consider Mew as his competitor, he was fucking jealous of him because Mew got Top and was chosen over eventually by Top. Mew has the power that Boston didn't think he had, till now. And tbh, Mew is now winning the game, despite his insecurities with his relationship with Top.

THE WAR HAS BEGUN, MY FRIENDS.

SandRay

God, I have so many feeling for these babies. Where to start? Okay so, you know in second episode, Sand built that boundary with Ray regarding friends with benefits? Well, it has backfired on him. COMPLETELY.

As ep 8 preview says, I love how Sand realised the fact that they were never friends to begin with, for even to have made that boundary to make sense. Sand is a pathetic little man, as so many of you have pointed out, but, why is he the way he is?

His incredible nature to be so caring of others around him has made him feel like its his responsibility to take care of everything. His mother, his business, his money and job, his style and even his fucking roommate. Now, Sand is so emotionally attached to this damsel in distress, pathetic burden to society (affectionate) Ray, that even before they became friends, he made Ray his responsibility. Sand has no right to ask for love from Ray, because they are not friends, lest friends with benefits to ask for any care towards himself. But he selfishly asks, for the first time.

Because, as a person who keeps on taking care of others endlessly, it is harder for them to ask for the care and love they expect and deserve from whom they love while keeping their self esteem intact. And for Ray to completely shut him down at that time, and him still following Ray while he was drunk, makes him so much real because you feel responsible for that person. You are their emergency staff, even if they don't consider you to be.

While Ray comes from another perspective itself. He initially wanted to know Sand more as a person, because he is a person who wanted to explore the life beyond what has been given to him. He is a spoilt brat, and when he realised that he can't buy Sand's love, he explored it with him.

But because I think Ray believes that Sand will always be for him, even when he does asshole-ish behaviour (because thats where everyone leaves) he has taken Sand for granted. The backup option. Anything goes wrong with his ideal relationship, he can always go running back to Sand, because Sand has become his addiction.

Apart from drugs and alcohol, Mew and Sand are the only people he can keep coming back to. For Mew, it is only at a cost. At some conditions, only for something personal. While maybe Ray wants explore that possibility with Sand, but he is afraid. He is afraid that Sand will go away. just as Mew did. A person who can only consider him a friend and nothing more. Even if he wants to explore that possibility with both of them, loving them at the same time, he can't make people his priority, because he doesn't know how to do that. Nor does he think he's worthy of it. So, he accepts whatever he thinks he deserves off Sand's love and care.

I am interested to see how it pans out for these idiots once his relationship with Mew falls out. I am concerned for Ray so much. Give him access to therapy and rehab soon pls. Sand and Ray's father I think are going in that direction, with this speculation by @prapaiwife.

BostonNick

Now, our final pair has been the most interesting couple in this show so far. Why do I say that?

Well, for Nick, Boston is one of the top-tier gays. As pointed out by Boston, he likes bad guys. And lets be honest, Boston, most dishonest, cunning bastard out there. So, Nick believes that he will be that gay who lands the top tier dick and fix this problem. Right?

Wrong. Nick very well knows this won't happen. Still he keeps hoping for more as Boston doesn't know how to not be a hypocrite as a prince. He keeps giving some here and there false hope through his actions, not words which makes Nick believe he's special, but he's not. He takes whatever love he thinks Boston gives him, despite him not being his number one, despite Boston cheats on him over and over again. He just wants whatever of love as actions that Boston can give to him because that proves wrong all of his low self esteem. So he accepts whatever he thinks he deserves because he can't ask for more in a bed friend relationship. With Boston's guard so up and his will to leave the country, Nick knows he can't do anything but try to make him stay. Even if that's a 99% chance of not happening. He tries because he doesn't want Boston to hate him. He only wants him to love him. Because for him, thats enough.

The sadness keeps on piling up for these outsider, hard working roommates, doesn't it?

While, for Boston, he is nothing but a rebound from the angst of not getting Top. He wants a serious relationship, and maybe, he does look for it in Nick, maybe not, but he doesn't love Nick. He doesn't love Top either. For Boston, Nick is a toy he wanted to play with.

Because he cares about his reign, his reputation. And, Nick realised that. Hence, Mew contacted him and Nick gave that information to Mew. They will bring Boston down together because Nick somewhere believes he can get him back.

But Nick babygirl, he doesn't love you bub. He doesn't. And, it hurts so much. Because Boston keeps on taking from you, whatever he deserves. And that is your care for him, for granted. He is a leech bub. He is.

Now, how does it all link to ephemerality and control?

Well, love itself is impermanent. It doesn't stay.

The world knows this and still we chase it. And at an age as our characters, we chase love and freedom like anything. In order to gain control. We take up jobs, more courses to learn, experiment with love and relationships, with people because the time is ticking and people say now is the age. We break hearts and get it broken.

As P'Jojo says "This show is Hurt People Hurt People", tell me who hasn't been hurt by love, by control and by living at its time? And also by missing out each of these experiences because you were lonely with your own life and burdens?

We accept the hate and love the life gives us, because this is what we think we deserve out of this. And tbh, these feelings, are never permanent. They keep changing with time, and that's the only thing thats permanent.

Change is the only thing that remains permanent.

[angeledeggs]

Can you pls do a HC for the courtiers where their S/o caught some illness and fell into a coma due to it? (Sleeping beauty sorta). Also how would they react after they wake up after a year or two? (:

//How are you doing? Had a nice day so far

This is so creative, yeah, I'll do it! I'm alright. Sorry writing has taken me longer 😭 I'm trying to make it higher quality for y'all to enjoy<33 thank all of yall for the requests!

Valerius🍷:

Oh gods, he's a mess.

He's already kind of a drinker but he DEFINITELY is drinking much more the first few weeks you fall into a coma.

Then he realizes that like, he definitely can't do that, what if you wake up and see him a drunken mess?

But then he realizes that you waking up is an if, and he drinks more.

He only stops when there happens to be a coincidental shortage of all spirits and all of the sort, and everything kind of clicks into place for him.

He has definite faith that you're going to wake up, and barely leaves your side.

He's a politician and as such, has countless meetings and scheduled appearances and things like that.

He ignores every one.

He'll make sure to take care of you in your coma, constantly checking your pulse, you're temperature, your breath. He even pays hundreds of physicians to try and help you, but none can find the answer. So he just stays with you and hopes.

He feels like a creep, always sitting with you, but he knows you're his lover and he'll stay with you for as long as it takes until you wake up.

He has so many dreams of you that when you finally awake, his first thought is he's dreaming. His hands reach out for you, though, instinctively, and when he touches your skin and sees your eyes he knows it's not a dream and bursts into tears immediately.

He'll definitely call your wake a miracle and will choke out prayers for the first time in years as he holds you.

Vlastomil🐛:

Valerius might numb the pain he feels with wine, but Vlastomil doesn't engage in such disgusting alcohol for his body.

The first few weeks he's anxiously jumping everytime he thinks he sees your breath sputter or pause, and is quick to check your breath and heartbeat.

He's desperate, and tries to read every book for anything he can find about your coma. He calls doctors, magicians, curse breakers, everyone, but he cant find anyone to help.

When the first month of your coma happens, he takes up smoking again.

But not just any type of smoking, no. When he was younger he would go for a cigar every now and then, but in the event of your coma he smokes two packs of simply cigarettes, right in a row, and when his chest wheezes, he only feels numb.

He never smokes in your room, he always smokes on the balcony, as he's too afraid that the smoke will hurt you.

After around a week of chain-smoking, he finally just quits. There's no point, as it barely calms him down. But he still shakes for cigarettes, for your awakening, so he drinks cup after cup of tea.

He finds it hard just to make one cup, when he's become so accustomed to making two.

You awake as his tea water is boiling, but he hears the slightest shift from your room and runs in so quickly that he knocks the pot clean off the stove.

He bursts into immediate, relieved tears when he sees you're finally awake, and embraces you as he falls to his knees, unable to even get out how he missed you so.

Valdemar💉:

They don't need anyone else's help.

You're the love of their life, they will be the one to care for you. They needn't any other doctor, any other magician, any of their assistants, nothing.

They practically dote on you, wait on you as if it is their life's duty. And as far as they're concerned, it is now, because they have abandoned their work and left it to collect dust in the dungeons.

They even leave their beloved beetles to Julian to take care of, for the are bugs and their pride and joy, yes, but you are the one person that softens them, their beloved, someone who they are certain is their soulmate.

They grow frustrated after months and months. They're a doctor, a scientist, a genius, dammit, and they can't figure out what's wrong.

They consider making another deal for your consciousness. But no. They will not sacrifice what's left of them another time. They will not rope you into their own mistakes. They will not give the devil what he wants.

They're transformed in the months of your coma. Their bandages are either dreadfully tight or messily loose, no in between, and their already gaunt body has turned thinner with the stress.

They are in a state of always checking your pulse, always stroking your hair, always whispering to the sun and moon their love for you, their pleas for you to return.

They move you often from not just laying but sitting positions so that when you awake you have no aches. For you will wake up. You will wake up or they will go with you.

And when you finally wake up, they can barely even speak. They can't speak. You have taken their work, their motivation, their remaining care for the beetles. They simply can't do it without you. And they drop to their knees in front of you, reaching for the pulse on your wrist, to feel it.

They feel a steady beat, rather than the slow, sleepy one that had plagued you in your coma. And they slump in relief, smile, kiss you with their mask on in their rush. You're back.

Volta🍰:

She just thinks you're really tired, at first. Then you're sleeping two days in a row and she is quite worried. She thinks you might be drunk or injured, but the alcohol cabinet is the way she left it and your body is relaxed with that of sleep, not slow death.

She's of course, an anxious mess. Usually, she simply cries when stressed, but she finds herself so worried that her tears turn into yelling. She screams at every doctor that doesn't know what to do with you until soon no more doctors will come and assess the situation.

She's so worried for you, that you'll die, and for a few days she ends up sleeping next to you, sobbing softly and praying to whoever will listen that she wants you to be fine when she wakes up. And after a few days she knows it's pointless.

She does her best to keep you comfortable, always adjusting your blankets to make sure your temperature is fine, carefully brushing your hair, trying to rouse you by lighting the incense.

She also tries to keep calm. She feels as though she is a doll that is splitting at the seams, and so she tries to engage in her hobby of baking, but when she finally finishes a cake and realizes you won't see it she collapses in the kitchen in grief.

She tries other hobbies.

Sewing is the only one she can handle, as she can be in the same room with you and sew you things for when you wake up. If you wake up. When you wake up.

She falls asleep with her needle and thread in her hand countless times and one day when she wakes, you're rubbing your eyes and sitting up.

Volta finds herself frozen for a long moment. Then she leaps over to you, wraps her arms around your shoulders and finally, she can cry and hold you with relief.

Vulgora⚔️:

They're usually very angry.

Usually.

But when they realize you're not sleeping, you're in a coma, they find themself a sudden, broken shell of their warrior spirit.

They try to reason with themself. They have won countless wars. They have killed thousands. They have seen countries rise and fall, and will continue to. But seeing you like this has made them weak.

You are their only weakness, and as such, they protect you with their life. Nobody hears of you or them, and they are constantly by your side, brushing back your hair and feeling for your heartbeat.

They rarely leave your side and as such, lose weight from how little they eat, in fear of leaving you and coming back to you hurt or.. Worse.

Their muscles are in a constant state of tense or shaking, and they find their strength has somehow left with your beautiful laugh and eyes. When they try to grab their sword, they crumble beneath their own very weapon that has slain all who faced them.

When you awake though, they suddenly stop shaking. Their muscles are hard with shock. And then they relax. And they collapse next to you, reach out for you, sighing of how relieved they are to see you awake, finally.

❀

PS GUYS OH MY GOD I THINK THIS MIGHT JUST BE ONE OF MY BEST WORKS I WASNT EVEN PLANNING TO RIGHT TODAY THIS ALL JUST HAPPENED LIKE OH MY GOD??? I GOT POSSESSED BY THE WRITERS BEFORE ME???? OH MY GOD YIPPEE

[book-place]

Sleigh Ride

Warnings: bad friends, let me know if I missed any :)

Pairings: Damian Wayne x reader platonic

Request: Ok then, can I pls request a batfam x reader (its mainly w damian) who's super oblivious? But they're friends with Damian eventho he's super harsh w her, but she knows he doesn't mean any of it. He had recently invited her to come and celebrate Christmas w him at the manor, but you kindly declined. You said you were going to another friend's house for Christmas. This would've been ok if it wasn't at Patricia's house. He absolutely despises Patricia. Patricia is bratty and always interrupts when you are talking then continues to take you away from him (he always tries his best not to be jealous or fight her). Anyways, the same day he overheard them talking trash about you, and that was his last straw.. So on, Christmas day, he offered to drive you to their house for the Christmas party Patricia was going to be holding. It took you about 3 minutes to realize that it wasn't the Way to her house. You asked where u were going, he admitted it was the way to the manor. After a while of bickering back and forth, you finally caved and agreed to go to the manor

Request by: @ladyagagaslefttoe

*not my gif*

Summary: Damian wasn’t happy when he heard who you were spending Christmas with

A/N: Welcome to Day 10 of Book Places 12 Days of Christmas Celebration

Please don’t plagiarize my work, you may reblog if you like but I’m asking that you don’t steal my hard work

You hummed softly as you rocked back and forth on your heels, shivering slightly against the cold as you pulled your jacket around yourself tighter.

Your best friend, Damian, had told you he would pick you up for school so that you didn’t have to take the ‘foul smelling and splitting headache giving bus’ as he so kindly put it.

Not that you minded, you enjoyed hanging out with him, especially since it was the last day of school before winter break.

When Alfred’s car pulled into view, you picked your jacket up with a smile and waved at the man in the driver's seat before slipping in the back next to Damain.

“Morning, Dami!” You chirped, reaching over and buckling your seatbelt.

“Good morning.” He replied curtly.

“Thank you so much for the ride, Mr. Pennyworth!” You called excitedly, causing the man to look in the mirror at you with a twinkle in his eye.

“It is not at all a problem, Miss. Y/n.” He beamed.

The car ride was spent in a comfortable silence for the first few minutes with you happily kicking your legs back and forth and the boy beside you staring out the window.

“Come over to the manor for Christmas.” Damian said suddenly, and you looked up at him.

Though it sounded like a demand, you knew better. You had been best friends with the boy for about three years and you knew that though he acted harsh, it was normally just his way of showing he cared.

You frowned a little, “I would love to, Dami, but I already promised Patricia that I would go over to her house.”

His eyebrows furrowed at your words.

If it had been anyone else, any of the other millions of kids at school that you were friendly to, he would have just shrugged it off. But this wasn’t just any other student, this was Patricia.

The same Patricia that Damain had to physically strain himself not to fight. The girl that was always smirking and making rude comments towards you. The one that would always interrupt you when you were talking.

You being the nice- and slightly oblivious- person that you were, you just took it all with a smile, claiming that she didn’t do anything wrong and was your friend.

He set his jaw, “Oh? Is that so?”

You nodded happily, not even noticing the slight change in his demeanor the way you normally would, “Yeah! Oh, it’s going to be so fun! Her whole family will be there, and some of her other friends…”

Damian couldn’t even hear the rest, because if Patricia was bad when it was just the two of you, she was ten times worse when she was with all of her friends.

“… I just have to figure out how to get there because I don’t have a ride-“

Those words snapped the boy out of his small trance and an idea slowly started to formulate in his head.

“I can provide you a ride,” He spoke as casually as he could.

Your eyes lit up in excitement, “Really? Oh, thank you, Dami!” You threw your arms around him in a quick hug, to which he awkwardly patted your back.

Now all he had to do was make sure you didn’t catch onto his plan.

-•-

You watched your shoes as they tapped against the pavement to the small rhythm that you were humming softly under your breath, swaying back and forth a little bit from where you sat on a step of your porch.

It was finally Christmas and you were waiting for Damian to come pick you up to bring you to Patricia’s house.

When the car pulled up, you stood up with a grin, shivering a little bit against the cold and pulling your arms around yourself as you greeted Alfred and slid into your seat.

“Merry Christmas!” You exclaimed, smiling excitedly at your best friend.

He gave you a nod in return, “And to you.” He said.

“Oh my gosh!” You gushed, “It’s going to be so much fun at Patricia’s! And you can come too! Oh, I’m sure she won’t mind, especially since you gave me the ride-“ You cut yourself off as a slight frown pulled at your lips, “Wait, where are we going?” You inquired, turning to Alfred with a questioning expression.

Instead of turning down the street that would take you straight to where Patricia lived, the driver had turned the opposite way.

The man didn’t answer though, Damian did, “You’re not going over her house.” He said simply.

You laughed a little, “Where am I going then?” You thought he was joking and Alfred had just taken a wrong turn.

“To my house.” He replied with a shrug. Of course, he almost never joked.

“Why?” You asked, smile dropping.

“Because, Patricia is nothing but a brat who does not treat you with the respect that you deserve.” His hand was clenched into a knuckle at his side.

“What are you talking about?”

He sighed a little bit, “I’m bringing you to my home to celebrate Christmas with me and my family so that you will actually have a good time.”

“But Patricia-“

“Is always rude to you,” He interrupted, “She’s always interrupting and spitting out mean comments at you.”

Your frown deepened, “I don’t-“

“Think about it,” He said sternly, but not in a mean way.

So you did, silencing a little bit.

The more you thought about it, the more you realized that he was right. She would often change the subject when you were talking about something that interested you and would make snide remarks about your clothing choices.

“Oh,” You breathed out, feeling like an idiot as you looked down at your hands folded in your lap, eyes stinging slightly as they begin to pool with tears.

“You didn’t know,” Damain dismissed, looking you dead in the eyes, and you knew that it was his way of comforting you.

You looked over at him with a grateful smile and squeezed his hand once, “I would love to come over your house for Christmas, it’s going to be a lot of fun.”

The Superior Robin ❤️- @ineedmorefanfics2 @sambucky8 @spidyyparker @i-writes-things

[muldermuse]

A Hard Day: Fox Mulder X Reader

Today I had a hard day and I just want a fictional FBI agent to take care of me lol

A/N: References to poor mental health, depression, anxiety and crying.

If u have any prompts or Fox Mulder ideas pls send them my way honeyss

You had lost track of how long you had been sitting in the darkness. You had not taken your work clothes off and you were sitting upright staring at a wall. Your shirt was itchy and your shoes were tight but you had no energy to change into your pyjamas. Today was awful, that many things had gone wrong that it was bordering on slightly funny that it had been such a catastrophe. However, rather than laughing at the past ten hours, you felt completely numb and unable to process your emotions. You did not want to take care of yourself, that would be an effort and take energy that you currently did not possess.

The room was still, occasionally a flicker of light would scatter across the wall from the window overlooking the street. You considered staying like this all night, hoping that maybe your exhaustion would overcome your emotions and you’d pass out asleep without needing to move. You had struggled with your mental health for a while and you were largely in control of it, however, slip ups were natural and days like today reminded you of how far you’d come. Despite the sadness that weighed down your limbs, you appreciated that days like this were few and far between. That was largely due to medication, routine and your boyfriend, Fox Mulder.

Which reminded you, it was a Thursday and you had arranged for Fox to stay over. You had a Thursday routine of having a pre weekend bottle of beer, making a sandwich and eating chips in front of the TV until you both had to drag the other to bed. You’d chat idly about the week, a blanket covering you on your sofa as you watched the Golden Girls with his arm protectively over your shoulder. You loved it and whilst you saw him most weekends; there was something special about your Thursday tradition. It wouldn’t be fair on him to stay tonight, you didn’t want to cancel but you’d accepted your fate of sitting in your dark room and trying to keep your thoughts from getting more negative.

No answer, straight to his voicemail. “Hi Fox, I’m really sorry but can we reschedule? I think I’m coming down with something and don’t want you to get ill. I’ll speak to you tomorrow, love you.” Your voice was one note, you didn’t sound ill and he could read you like a book. Even over a voicemail, he’d be able to pick up on your tone and you hoped he wouldn’t question it. You decided to lie down on the sofa and wait for it to become a reasonable time to lie in bed.

***

The knock at the door scared the life out of you, you felt your anxiety rise in your throat as you tried to stop your hands trembling from the fright. You peered through the peephole even though you knew who it was; there stood Fox, his tie loose around his neck and clutching a brown grocery store bag. You exhaled deeply, willing your hands to stop shaking as you smiled before opening the door. He could see right through you but maybe it would be worth a shot.

“Hi,” your voice faltered, you needed to try and sound better than you did on the phone. “Didn’t you get my voicemail? I think I’m getting ill so it’s probably best you don’t stay tonight”. Your eyes trailed away from him as you finished your sentence; you couldn’t look at him as you lied. You felt your breathing start to become laboured as the hot prick of tears filled your eye line. You made your hands into fists; desperately trying to stop the tears from streaming down your face.

“No I got it,” his hand reached out to gently rub your shoulder but you still couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. “Even if you’re ill, I just thought you could use some company. You sounded upset on the phone and I was worried”. Your kind boyfriend, your sweet and loving partner who knew you better than anyone else ever had. Wordlessly, you stepped aside and let him enter your apartment. He pressed a kiss to your cheek as he flicked the light on and walked past you. You let out a shuddered breath and followed him to the kitchen counter. With every step you took; you felt a sob begin to form at the top of your throat.

“So firstly, I think it’s rude of you to get ill on a Thursday,” he smirked as he began to open the grocery bag he had placed on the counter. “We both agree that it is the best day of the week and I refuse to let this illness take this away from us. I got that soup you like from the store on Woodland, you know the one where we saw those really suspiciously large footprints in the produce aisle? I’m still trying to convince Scully that it’s an X File” His face lit up as he laughed, god, you loved him. You so desperately wanted to laugh with him but you knew as soon as you opened your mouth your body would betray you and tears would run down your face. You smiled back and tried to bury down the flicker of concern you saw in his eyes.

“I thought I could warm the soup up and whilst you got changed or had a hot shower? We could just sit on the sofa and watch Golden Girls together or Cops, I mean whatever is on.” Before you could interrupt, he continued as he made his way over to you with his arms outstretched as he brought you against him for a hug. "Then, for later- I mean if you’re feeling well enough, I bought those sour candies you like? They only had the huge bags so I suppose if you’re feeling sick that it’s probably the worst thing I could have brought you but still I th-“. As he held you tightly in his arms, you felt the tears start to come and you choked out a huge sob. He just held you tighter as you cried, his hands ran through your hair as you wept and wept and wept until you felt you had no liquid left to leave your tear ducts. You had no idea how long he’d been holding you, his shirt was wet with tears and your throat felt raw from your sobbing.

“Did that help?” you stayed in his arms, trying to steady your breathing as you nodded. “Okay good, go for a shower, I’ll lie some clothes out on the bed and get the soup ready for you.” You didn’t speak, you just got on your tip toes and pressed a kiss to his soft lips.

***

The shower helped more than you cared to admit. The hot water beating down on your skin seemed to strip away layers of your day and you felt yourself begin to breathe easier as your chest felt the most open it had all day. You hadn’t realised how restricted your chest had been until now, you didn’t notice how tight your jaw had become and how tense your neck had been. You let out a shuddering breath as you turned off the water and stepped out and wrapped your soft towels around your body.

Your bedroom was tidier than you left it. Your work clothes were hung in your wardrobe, a clean linen candle was lit and your childhood teddy sat up in the centre of the bed, your reading glasses placed on his head and an open book in his hands. You genuinely smiled for what felt like the first time all night. Fox had laid out your pyjama bottoms and one of his old basketball shirts on your bed for you to change into.

The scattered fairy lights illuminated your living room with a warm glow. The smell of tomato soup and Fox’s aftershave lingered in the air as you took the bowl from the side and joined your boyfriend on the sofa. He’d gotten changed into some loose shorts and a t shirt from Old Navy that had been stretched beyond all recognition. His glasses were steamy from the soup he held in one hand as he used the other to pat the spot next to him on the sofa. He smiled at you as you sat down, he looked relieved and clearly noticed how much better you felt.

You both ate your soup in silence as you watched Golden Girls, when you finished you laid your head on his chest as he absentmindedly traced shapes on your back. “Thank y-“ you started as you lifted your head to face him, he kissed you quick before you could finish your sentence. “You don’t need to thank me, we’re a team you know that? Seeing you smile is worth it”.

[dira333]

heyyy idk if you're still doing platonic matchups? I saw someone reblog and I assumed you were, if you aren't ignore this pls🫶🏻 but if possible maybe knb, slime and haikyu

uhm a little bit about me-

I'm an extrovert, through and through except for when I'm in my absolute feels, but even then I'll reach out to someone just to be with them, people comfort me

i love reading, mostly psychological thrillers or horror and fantasy as well

i do love anime but haven't been able to watch it for a while cause I've got exams and stuff but my all time fav and comfort anime is haikyu

i love playing games, i started recently so i kinda suck lmao but I watch a lot of streamers and playthroughs cause I can't afford most of the games i think I'd like💀

as a person I'd like to think I'm kind, i'm very empathetic (not like I can read your mind and shi just higher chances of understanding what you might feel)and im very open about my dislikes and likes and stuff so people call me "bitchy" and yeah that's about it, I love your works🫶🏻🫶🏻

Hey there! Oh yes, I'm still doing them, no worries!

To anyone else who's interested, you can still send in a request for a matchup or for a little drabble with a number from this list

I think for KnB I'd match you up with Shinji Koganei, the original catmouth... He's cute, funny and loves so many different things. He'd totally freak out over your book choice of the week but use it as an excuse to shamelessly cuddle you while you read, saying that you have to protect him - just in case.

For Slime (I only know what Wikipedia has told me, so excuse me if I get something wrong) I'd pick Veldora . He sounds like he's got a much calmer vibe and I think he'd be great at balancing you out.

And for Haikyuu.... I don't know why, but my gut is telling me Nishinoya. You'd do a lot of traveling with him for sure, but he thinks you're the smartest person alive with the amount you're reading and even though he can barely sit still long enough to watch you play games, he's convinced your skills are boss-level amazing.

So, what do you think?

[the-vibes-are-off]

‘ The Stormlight Archives Volume One: The Way of Kings’ Review - Prelude + Prologue

So is the way when my partner buys me his favourite book and I study English Literature, so must I be overly thorough in reviewing it. Welcome to my scuffed part-by-part criticism and appreciation.

link to contents page - https://at.tumblr.com/the-vibes-are-off/hey-hey/96xd9ohihrzs

Now I’m busy today so I’m only doing the prelude and prologue for now as a way of introducing what I’m tabbing and why. Since I don’t know a lot about the series I’m tabbing it like I would most other non-focused tabbings mainly with just bits that I like over anything else and, since it’s an author I’m unfamiliar with in a genre I don’t read, I have included a ‘hate this’ tab in case this reaches anyone who is either interested in reading the series and wants honesty or for any particularly argumentative fans that want to debate.

I’ve decided to split into spoiler free and spoiler filled sections in order to explain my tabbings to both read and unread readers - tab count for the current section and total read so far will be at the bottom.

Spoiler Free Zone:

The prelude definitely starts off the book with an interesting historical baseline and soft introducing what I assume is lore to be further revealed as time goes on. Very typical dark and gloomy fantasy setting I would say, definitely could probs be written better but is certainly interesting.

This follows in the prologue 100%. Brandon deffo has the imagination to be thinking up races/groups of people, characters, weapons, abilities etc and the scenes are descriptive and dynamic to an extent however I have beef with some of his basic writing technique. Clearly with it being 1007 pages long he has no qualms with book length but has a tendency to repeat paragraph openers (which whatever like that is admittedly minor) and tell rather than show (which is the bit that gets me).

*SPOILER BUFFER*

Spoiler Zone - Enter at your own risk:

Admittedly I can’t say the first page was initially gripping me, typical large scale beast fight. I think the desolation of the fight could definitely have been described better but from what I can gather the fight is more of just a precursor to the important lore so it isn’t that deep.

Naturally I tabbed cool swords yes yes yes cool swords gimme cool swords followed by torture (horror fan me very happy at any gruesome adjacent description). Tabbed a ‘WTF? Why?’ At furthering lore. Oathpact? Cycle of Desolations? Why is it ending? Gimme more pls pls pls but at the end of the day it is the prelude so I had to live.

Loved the quote at the start of the chapter, a lovely form feature I wasn’t expecting. 100% first slay quote I love when books have quotes at the start of chapters, usually allusions to other texts but an in world quote definitely still works.

First love this was at the description of the women. What can I say. I love women. I am biased.

My first beef (hate this) was with the explanation of a ‘lashing’. I get it needing context with lashing typically meaning something else but like maybe gloss it in the back or at the bottom of the page so that it doesn’t take you out of the fight and rather acts as like an optional contextualisation.

Tbf tho Brandon hit me with more cool swords for my first ‘WTF WOW’ tab bc sword that cuts someone’s soul? Come on man like that’s so sick.

We love a cheeky bit of lore too - I had to add a bonus tabby for lore insertions. Nice to have more context for the start (I assume?).

Our first named death too? Before chapter one? With a cryptic last wish. Classic set up that you can’t help but love.

Tab Count:

This Part -

Cute: 0

Fights/Violence*: 2

Sad :(: 0

Death**: 1

Cool: 2

Wtf why: 1

Wtf wow: 1

Slay Quotes: 1

Love this!: 1

Hate this >:/: 1

Cool lore insert: 1

Total-

Cute: 0

Fights/Violence: 2

Sad :(: 0

Death: 1

Cool: 2

Wtf why: 1

Wtf wow: 1

Slay quotes: 1

Love this!: 1

Hate this >:/: 1

* - fights are tabbed at a new enemy (ie in prologue when it changes from guards to the king)

* *- deaths include named character deaths only

[frigid-moon-fall]

Reaching out to the people doing scans was a great decision. You have no idea how long I spent staring at a listing for the Kratos novel last month, fighting myself because it's so freaking expensive compared to all the other novels... I could get like 10 novels for the same price... 40 if it's from a specific store during a campaign. And nobody seemed to care about the novels (hadn't seen the Phantasia ones being uploaded yet at the time), so who else was going to do it...!! Ended up deciding against it because it's Symphonia, the favorite child, and if anyone was going to give a crap about any of the Tales series novelizations, it'd be Symphonia's, and if they were going to care about any specific novel, it'd definitely be that one, so I might as well pour my blood love into the less popular entries. (And for once, I was right!)

That is to say, I have quite a few Tales novels on the way, and I will also be scanning them (though with a very ancient, borrowed scanner), and there shouldn't be any overlap with what Kevan33 is graciously doing. Here's hoping the box doesn't get lost in the mail :') Hasn't shipped yet, because I'm waiting on one more book to reach the warehouse, which I was only able to afford because I reached out. I would have wasted money getting a few novels that were already going to be scanned. (jfc this one book is also about the same price as the Kratos novel.... But I have a bit of a confusing Personal Investment in this particular one now that I'll share once it's in my hands.)

I wonder if I should try to contact the person going by Stahn's name on archive too? If I'd overlap with anyone, it'd probably be someone named for Destiny stuff. I mean, I guess it doesn't matter if I'd overlap with them since the novels are already bought and paid for and I couldn't get a refund even if I tried. And also they seem to only be uploading guidebooks. (Which are also super heckin' cool because they also have lore in them)

It'll be like 4 months before the box gets here, and it's not just the Destiny novels. So I guess I'll post a list of everything I'll be ripping/scanning just in case. I'd love it if more people did this stuff, so if there's anyone interested in buying stuff like this to continue to archive it (it's not like anyone who contributed to making them is making money off of them anymore. At least, I'm pretty sure they aren't), here's a list of stuff I've already got coming so you can cross it off your own list.

Tales of Destiny novels (tl;dr: ALL OF THEM):

ルーティのルール

青の記憶

天地戦争編

運命をつぐもの上巻

運命をつぐもの下巻

蒼黒の想い上巻

蒼黒の想い下巻

Tales of Destiny 2 novels (tl;dr: ALL OF THEM):

英雄を探す少女

二人の聖女

運命の果てに

蒼黒の追憶上巻

蒼黒の追憶中巻

蒼黒の追憶下巻

朱鷺色の風

Tales of Eternia novels (NOT all of them):

蒼天の星上巻

蒼天の星下巻

暁の約束上巻

暁の約束下巻

リッドのとかげ

キールの希望

(For those keeping track, that means what remains of Eternia is all 3 volumes of 永遠のきざはし, and 聖エルモの灯.)

Misc:

テイルズリング アーカイブ EPIC TWO ～英雄の飛翔～

テイルズオブカウントダウン DVD

テイルズ オブ シンフォニア 4コマミニミニ大図鑑

Do As Infinity - TAO (early demo)

(Note: The Countdown DVD has been partially uploaded and even partially subtitled before, but the full thing has not been uploaded before! I don't know if there's anything hiding on the Peach Gummy DVD (which has been uploaded before) too, but the cheapest way to get the Countdown DVD was in a bundle with that, so I guess I'll have that too. Also I didn't buy anything for the early demo, but I do have the mp3 sitting around from.. somewhere? I swear I got it from Abyssal Chronicles way back when Legendia was first unveiled, but I couldn't find it anywhere even on archived versions of the site. It's clearly an earlier draft of the song and the vocalist is also very clearly Tomiko Van. I couldn't find any mention of this thing anywhere, so am I sitting on Lost Media? Or would uploading it be pointless?)

Misc whose names I'm obscuring because I'm not actually sure if the artists are still making money off of them, give me advice pls

The DVD with the pachislot animation on it. I'm not sure if it's been uploaded in full (none of the few compilations say so), but it's probably never been uploaded in its full quality. I might upload just the video without the audio.

The artbook of the artist of the TODDC manga. I don't know if it's been uploaded in full before. (I found it for pretty cheap, or else I might not have bothered...) Actually, I'd rather someone else with a better scanner and a willingness to unbind it (I'm not unbinding any of these; my hands aren't steady enough) to scan this anyway, so maybe go for this one anyway if you're looking to get stuff scanned.

Also secured by someone else is Tales of Destiny 2's manga, Tales of Destiny Director's Cut's manga, and the French localization of Tales of Destiny's first manga. The first two are already scanned, plans to scan the last one, but I'm not sure if they want to upload them to archive. They are absolutely willing to give them to people who would want to translate them, though.

[seiwas]

op i am in love with this oh my god

everything abt this op, i adore so much—the characterisation, the writing, the pacing, the dialogue oh my god THE DIALOGUE!!!! it's sooooo good!! i so love their dynamic and the way you inject how reader/bakugo feels in little statements like this: he's a proper distraction from the pain at least. <- it shows so much of how reader views him in such a subtle sentence UGH i love it.

there's also the little ways katsuki cares. i am such a sucker for subtle intimacy, and i think this counts as one of them—the candy he hides beneath ointments and bandages (pls omFg that is so sweet)

and there's this line i love too: you read him like a book, finger the pages, read between the lines. <- it's so pretty!!

i love the way you characterised katsuki. how of course he feels bad about it and beats himself up. ofc he feels guilty, esp since he knows it's truly his fault.

 "And who's fault is that." He grins, light and easy and gone in an instant, with a flash of realization, guilt that reaches his eyes and worries his brow. It's his, still. <- this bit rlly got to me... bc he was just joking!!! but realised it in the middle 😭😭

He decides it's easier to turn his back to them, to you - again. It's always the same song and dance, one step forward, two steps back. <- OFC he chooses not to confront asdbgsjad

there's smth abt their dynamic that appeals to me so much too!! i think it's largely bc of the way reader was set up 🥺 how their personality challenges his, complements him in a way that matches his spunk!! they tease him and know just what gets him to move 🤧 when he bits at the bait OUUUUUGHH i go insane:

Warm fingers encircle your wrist and you bite your tongue suppress the laugh inching its way up your throat. Predictable, cute. It takes everything in you not to grin.

how he holds out his hand and reader puts their own?? and he's like 'the ointment, idiot' but he lets the hand linGER??? omg R U KIDDING ME OP. that GESTURE HAS ME SDBAS. THEN he grabs the other hand too ??!??!!? such small gestures but. i love how u put them under a microscope sjdhfbdjsa

i love the tiptoeing between them. how their relationship is teetering on a string, ready to tip over. the tension in their interactions now and the one that started to blur it all AAAH

You grin, fingers gently curling around his own. It's not meant to be romantic, the way he draws you forward, presses your knuckles to his chest. He's just trying to get a better look at the wound, head tilting this way and that. But his hand is so warm, and he's so pretty from this angle, and when his eyes rise to meet yours his breath hitches in his throat; and so does yours. <- my breath did indeed hitch at this my GOd

not when he crowded you against the wall, not when his big hand fell to the space beside your head, or when his face dipped to linger just close enough to have your heart beating wildly in your chest. <- this was so hot op h my GOOOOOOD icb he did this

You would be, should be, if it was anyone else. Big, leering, all rippling muscle and explosive temper - but it was Bakugou, your mentor, your best friend, heart of a hero and handsome as hell. You've loved him as long as you've known him. <- full on crying at thiS

He'd grinned, leaned forward til' his lips found yours, deeper, sweeter than you'd ever imagined, and gods you had, too many times <- the GRIN!! i can't stop thinking abt the GRIN 😭😭😭

i am also such a huge sucker for callbacks in writing, and you did that here op omg it was so cute 😭:

"Quit bein' a baby." Bakugou's bark holds no bite, touch softening until his rough fingers border featherlight. "Yer a hero, r'member."

their back-and-forth banter is so satisfying too. how reader watches out for him and tells him he wouldn't have been able to handle it (but he insists he does—eyes behind his head. and there's a whole 'remember seeing you almost whacked in the head' — need to get eyes checked — hearing too bc heard him like a crybaby AAAH idk!! just!! i love this kind of challenge for him 🥺

reader is so dramatic to him and i find it so funny 😭 the forehead flick and how they throw themselves over his lap, teasing!! UGHH then how he presses a kiss to reader's forehead?!???! HELLLOOOOOGUUGH????

his thumb absently strokes the soft underside of your wrist but his gaze doesn't linger. A hint of a blush creeps up his neck, eyes fixated on the opposite corner of the room. "Done bein' a crybaby?" <- this iS SOOOOOO intimate i wanna cry sahdbfsj and the callback to being a crybaby too omg 😭 everything abt this just feels so well-rounded op

"Whether or not you have eyes on the back of your head." He ignores your teasing, so you press a little further, tease a little more. "Either you don't," you squeeze him tighter, closer, smush your cheek against his back. "Or you totally just let me hug you." <-i was squEALING icb reader did that 😭 there's so much comfort in this, and intimacy, that only a reader as gutsy as the one you made can deliver

Finally he catches you, two big hands clamped down on either shoulder. You wait for him to scold you, tongue between your teeth, bated breath in your lungs. But he only grunts, fingers curling around the base of your neck until he can slant his lips over your own; You sigh, it's the second time Katsuki Bakugou's lips have been on yours. But they no longer taste of saltines, white wine, impulse or hesitation; it's not some drunken mistake or whimsy he'll pretend to have forgotten by morning. This time he's kissing you because he wants to. Because the feelings he harbors are just the same as yours. <- SCREAMED AT THIS. COMPLETELY, OP like, i love the way this paragraph flows but also ICB THE KISS OH MY GOD. the tiPPING point.

and there's another pretty paragraph: And when he pulls away his red eyes have mellowed, a dull amber, an expectant cinnabar. There's a palpable silence, one beat, two, three - possibly. His impatience gets the better of him. "Well?" <- a dull amber, an expectant cinnabar (your descriptions are so good op!!) and you characterise him being impatient too UGH so good

and ok op, i know am copy pasting so much and reacting so crazily but this entire sequence just!!! makes me ache in all the good ways oh my god:

He sucks on his teeth. "Cute huh?" His hand cups your wrist, thumbs the bandage, careful, cute. "I nearly cooked ya and 'm 'cute?'"

"There's somethin' wrong with you."

"Yeah, it's called the guy I like is completely oblivious and won't tell me he likes me."

"I kissed you, twice. If ya didn't take the hint, that's on you."

and when reader smiles when they repeatedly kiSS HIM oh my god and tells him: What? Didn't you take the hint?" You slant your mouth over his, linger a little longer this time. "I like you." You kiss him again, again, again. <- the callback, the flirting, their chemiSTRY OP you built everything up so well and wrote everything so well AND I AM JUSTTT A MELTED PUDDLE RN

this is barely coherent, but thank u so much for writing this op 🥺  i adore this piece so much!!!

pro hero!bakugou x sidekick!reader | fluff, mutual pining, blatant flirting, bakugou calls reader darlin', bakugou is soft(ish) | cw: injury, mentions of alcohol, name calling (idiot), kisses kisses kisses

-bakugou tends to your injury, pining for you nearly as much as you do for him-

Your arm burns in waves, like kindling fire, the plain between your elbow and wrist a bramble of red and purple. It stings like a million tiny thorns pricking your skin.

"Why'd ya get in the way, idiot!" Bakugou's words are fierce and his brow is drawn, but you see the way his cheeks flush. He's embarrassed, guilt-ridden though it's not his fault. Not really.

You were both too overzealous for your own goods, determined to land the final blow on the villains. But his quirk was bigger, more explosive, harder to stop when your hands inevitably collided. You're just lucky your arm took the brunt of it.

Still, you smile despite the pain and his frown deepens, "What? Ya hit yer head too?"

You take a step forward, then two, crossing the threshold of your front door, reveling in the way his blush travels to his ears. "Did you come all the way here just to nag me?" There's a lilt of amusement in your voice, and he huffs, exasperation on his breath. "Or are you finally gonna give me that?"

You point to the bag dangling from his fingertips, pharmacy label half hidden by his baggy combat trousers. He's still in costume, mask pushed up over his wild, blonde hair, light sheen of sweat dotting his forehead and shoulders.

He's a proper distraction from the pain at least.

His gaze falls to his own hand, as if he'd entirely forgotten. There's a palpable moment of hesitation, and then he grunts, knuckles clenching; he thrusts it against your chest.

"Did'ya sterilize it, at least?"

You're half listening, shuffling through the contents of the bag. "Mhm, rinsed it with water when I got home."

"Yer hopeless, darlin'."

You shrug, "If a little burn could take me out, I wouldn't be much of a hero, now would I?"

He snorts, "If ya were such a good hero, you'd have dodged in the first place."

"You think?" You humor his attitude, heart swelling in your chest when you spot your favorite candy hidden beneath the ointments and bandages. You have half a mind to tease him about it. "Are you gonna help me put this on?"

His arms fold across his chest, half a scowl twisting his face. He leans back, tapping a heavy boot against the floorboards. "And why would I do that?"

He must think he's subtle but you read him like a book, finger the pages, read between the lines. There's worry in his brow, guilt, turmoil, anger directed at his own self.

You figured it would help alleviate his conscience, at least.

"That's fine. I'll get around to it eventually." You turn on your heel, adding a cheeky "probably" to accentuate the wave of your hand, nudge him into action. It works.

Warm fingers encircle your wrist and you bite your tongue, suppress the laugh inching it's way up your throat. Predictable, cute. It takes everything in you not to grin.

Two big hands push you down by the shoulders, cushions folding beneath your thighs. Bakugou holds a palm out expectantly and you place your own atop his, reveling in the way his nose scrunches in frustration.

You don't miss the way he lets it linger - just for a moment - before finally swatting it away with a half-hearted flick of the wrist. "The ointment, idiot."

You relent, handing him the thin white tube. He spreads a stripe down his fingertips, seat dipping beside you; he extends his opposite hand. "Now your hand."

You grin, fingers gently curling around his own. It's not meant to be romantic, the way he draws you forward, presses your knuckles to his chest. He's just trying to get a better look at the wound, head tilting this way and that. But his hand is so warm, and he's so pretty from this angle, and when his eyes rise to meet yours his breath hitches in his throat; and so does yours.

It's intimate, familiar.

It makes you want to break whatever this unspoken 'something' is that the two of you have fostered - this growing affection you're both too proud to admit that wears on you, leaves you yearning to lean just a little closer and finally concede.

Just like all those nights ago, when he got a little too drunk at the hero convention, quickly annoyed by the crowds and reporters, the loud, boasting heroes. His champagne glass was quickly emptied once more, grunting when he pushed back in his chair. You remember leaning closer, close enough to discretely ask if he was alright. His red hot stare followed, burned through your chest and down to your core, left you shifting restlessly in your seat.

The air was thick when he finally careened upward, swaying perilously as he took you by the wrist, led you up and out of the dining hall until it was just the two of you, alone in an empty corridor. You could still hear the echo of stranger's voices, but it didn't bother him, not when he crowded you against the wall, not when his big hand fell to the space beside your head, or when his face dipped to linger just close enough to have your heart beating wildly in your chest.

"What about the party?"

"'as boring." He'd replied, fingers 'round your wrist, lingering on your pulse; he feels it stutter beneath his touch. "Ya scared?"

You would be, should be, if it was anyone else. Big, leering, all rippling muscle and explosive temper - but it was Bakugou, your mentor, your best friend, heart of a hero and handsome as hell. You've loved him as long as you've known him.

"No."

He'd grinned, leaned forward til' his lips found yours, deeper, sweeter than you'd ever imagined, and gods you had, too many times.

"Good."

You're so lost in thought that you miss the way skin meets skin, thin buffer of ointment between you, and it burns - his fingers against your aching forearm. Your cheeky smile twists into a grimace and you can almost taste his guilt.

"Quit bein' a baby." Bakugou's bark holds no bite, touch softening until his rough fingers border featherlight. "Yer a hero, r'member."

You watch as he carefully applies the medicine, touch gentling each time you flinch until he's barely touching you at all.

"You've said that a lot today. 'Hero'." You muse. "It's usually sidekick this, sidekick that."

He shoots you a look before wiping the ointment from his fingers. "Yer my sidekick."

"Yeah?" You tilt your head, leaning forward to rest your chin on your unattended hand. "And what's the difference?"

He could answer you honestly, if he wanted. You're capable, brave, strong in your own right - beautiful to boot. You're the best of the best; Bakugou would never settle for less after all. Not that he was going to admit that.

Instead his lips twist in amusement, curling, lopsided, askew; you realize you won't be getting a straight answer.

"Ya should know by now when t' stay out of my way, is the difference." He pulls a bandage as big as his fist from the bag, pressing one corner to the flat of your palm, working it up and around until it reaches your wrist, and further still. "Was perfectly capable of handlin' it on my own."

"Seemed like you had your hands full with the big guy," you quip back, rubbing your thumb absently over the scratchy bandage. "Was I supposed to watch while the other one pummeled you from behind?"

He quirks a brow, you're not sure if he's annoyed or amused. "Woulda been fine. How d'ya think I made it to the top twenty, 've practically got eyes on the back of my head."

"You sure? Think I recall a time or two you've been whacked upside the head."

His eyes stray for only a moment, simmering up at you beneath dark lashes. "Think we might need t' get yer eyes checked, darlin', seems yer seein' things."

"Guess I need a hearing test too, since I remember you being a total crybaby about it."

He centers the tips of his thumb and pointer just above your brow, fingertips bouncing off your forehead, a tepid flick! and he's resuming his handiwork.

"Hey!" you pout, rubbing the offended area with your unfettered hand. "I'm a patient, you're supposed to be nice to me!"

"And who's fault is that." He grins, light and easy and gone in an instant, with a flash of realization, guilt that reaches his eyes and worries his brow. It's his, still.

You sigh, "Look at me." And he does, begrudgingly as it may be. "It's not your fault. I should have trusted you more. And you should have trusted me. We're both idiots so quit blaming yourself." You lightly flick his forehead in return; he doesn't flinch, eyes never leaving your own. "Finish the wrapping and we'll call it even, yeah?"

He grumbles something lost on you, stretching the last bit of fabric beneath your elbow and tucking it into itself. He turns your arm over in his palm, lightly, carefully inspecting it before leaning back against the cushions. You can feel his guilt dissipate, the stress in his shoulders slowly deflating.

"Ya hurt anywhere else?" His voice is low, quiet. He desperately hopes not.

You think for a moment, read his face, his body language, and then you're rubbing the space above your brow, faking a pout if only to lighten the mood. "Yeah, some brute bruised my forehead earlier, think it needs medical attention."

He crosses his arms, muscles flexing, brow tightening in discontent. "I'm being serious."

You struggle to suppress the laugh bubbling up in your chest. "So am I. What a devastating injury, I fear I won't live long." You dramatically throw yourself over his lap, knuckles laid flat over your brow. There's a conflicting look in his eye; you struggle to read it. "If only a big, handsome hero woul-"

You nearly miss the annoyed huff, the subtle roll of his eyes, too enamored in the way he encircles your wrist with one big hand, guides it to rest against his chest before leaning down and pressing his lips to your forehead.

You're sure there's hearts in your eyes when he straightens his shoulders, hand still idle against his heartbeat; his thumb absently strokes the soft underside of your wrist but his gaze doesn't linger. A hint of a blush creeps up his neck, eyes fixated on the opposite corner of the room. "Done bein' a crybaby?"

You try and fail, miserably so, to hide the delight dancing in your chest and curling your toes. There's a grin splitting your cheeks when you sit up, face an inch from his own. "Mhm."

You can feel his breath, his hesitation, the slippery, fluttering feelings he's struggling to catch, and name, and put into words. He decides it's easier to turn his back to them, to you - again.

It's always the same song and dance, one step forward, two steps back.

He's up in a moment, fidgeting with his tank, his gloves, his mask, anything he can get his hands on. You sigh, pushing off the couch, taking one step, two, arms wrapping snug around his middle. "What're ya doin'?"

"Checking something."

"And what's that?"

"Whether or not you have eyes on the back of your head." He ignores your teasing, so you press a little further, tease a little more. "Either you don't," you squeeze him tighter, closer, smush your cheek against his back. "Or you totally just let me hug you."

He croons his head to stare you down, if looks could kill, you'd be very very toasty right about now. Still you laugh, hide your smile in the shadow of his broad shoulders, tip toe around him when twists around to face you.

Finally he catches you, two big hands clamped down on either shoulder. You wait for him to scold you, tongue between your teeth, bated breath in your lungs. But he only grunts, fingers curling around the base of your neck until he can slant his lips over your own.

You sigh, it's the second time Katsuki Bakugou's lips have been on yours. But they no longer taste of saltines, white wine, impulse or hesitation; it's not some drunken mistake or whimsy he'll pretend to have forgotten by morning. This time he's kissing you because he wants to. Because the feelings he harbors are just the same as yours.

And when he pulls away his red eyes have mellowed, a dull amber, an expectant cinnabar. There's a palpable silence, one beat, two, three - possibly. His impatience gets the better of him. "Well?"

You stifle a laugh, keen up at him, hands absently against his chest. "Well what?"

"What d'ya mean 'well what'?!"

What ever self control you had wavers, the incredulous look in his eyes sending you over the edge until your devolving into a fit of laughter.

"What's so funny, huh?"

"'m sorry." The laughter rattles you, chest like a suitcase too small to pack away the joy that fills you, spills over the brim in fits of laughter. It's infectious; Bakugou grins.

Your hands cup his cheeks. "You're too cute not to tease."

He sucks on his teeth. "Cute huh?" His hand cups your wrist, thumbs the bandage, careful, cute. "I nearly cooked ya and 'm 'cute?'"

You lean forward, bump your nose against his. "Mhm."

"There's somethin' wrong with you."

"Yeah, it's called the guy I like is completely oblivious and won't tell me he likes me."

"I kissed you, twice. If ya didn't take the hint, that's on you."

You're smiling when you press your lips to his - quick, tepid, chaste, and over and over and over again.

He breaks away, eyes full of suspicion. "What was that for?"

"What? Didn't you take the hint?" You slant your mouth over his, linger a little longer this time. "I like you." You kiss him again, again, again.

He snorts, palm falling to the small of your back, big hand heavy on your skin. "Point taken."

He dips his head low, kisses you, soft and slow, fingers flexing against your shirt, dragging you closer when you move to pull back. "I like ya." His breath is hot against your mouth. "Always have."

[elodieballard]

because you love her.

jace wayland x fem reader

summary: basically u have no clue how ur love life with jace is going

warnings: clueless clary, lashing out, a little bit of obsession??? jace is a little bit of an idiot (not rude, just ignorant) super off plot of tmi with like one scene you’d know, dorothea is like COMPLETELY ooc (out of character) ooc hodge, slightly ooc clary

i know it sounds boring but i’m just lazy to put anything so lol

also pls excuse the terrible pov pronouns im trying to use second person instead of first for this fic so yeah

AND my only knowledge of tmi is the movie so be kind 🤗🤗

-

you turn another page in your book, daydreaming as your eyes stare at the words on the pages.

jace. jace, jace, jace, jace.

it was all jace, the only thing that clouded your mind. you found it hard to tear yourself away from the thought of him when you imagined what his lips would feel like. would taste like.

it’s been some time now, the amount of time you’ve been in love with jace. i mean, how couldn’t you? he is an angel—and lord you hate to remember how that was actually literal—but he’s kind behind all of his sarcasm.

he’s really attractive. hot. handsome. pretty, even.

scratch that, he’s more than pretty. he is gorgeous.

when you think about rain, you think about jace. you’ve always loved rain, so the two correlate.

reading, too. reading is always a fun and calming thing to do, even if you’re teased for it.

it’s not very common for shadowhunters or demon hunters to be so soft, at least that’s what jace thought.

until he met you. he likes your softness. he liked a little too much, even. he likes that you don’t wear an overly amount of makeup like izzy does.

he likes that you’re comfortable with your own beauty. sure, he knows you aren’t confident, which he doesn’t understand.

he loved all of things before clary came. to you, he was okay with those things. he didn’t care about the reading or the makeup, that’s why he didn’t tease you for it.

but when clary came, things changed. you noticed jace didn’t care much to defend you against alec’s smart comments about reading, and he didn’t even protest when izzy suggested giving you a makeover when it was time to go to magnus’ party.

yesterday, you blinked harshly as izzy’s hair curler left a section in your hair. you were deep in thought as izzy styles your hair, smiling as she brushed some hair out of your face.

“what’s gotten you so worked up?” she said in a tone one talks in after laughing. anyone else would suppose she was being sarcastic, teasing you, even. clary probably would. but you knew izzy for your entire life to know how to read in between the lines.

“i just wish i wasn’t here.” you mumbled, looking to the side.

“with me?” she scrunched your hair a little bit, giving it volume.

“no, i’d love to be in here talking to you about the party and if there would be any cute boys there or even the fucking escape route we’ll have to use once we crash the whole thing.” your voice was getting louder by the moment and izzy knew something was up.

“if you’re worried about miss googly eyed carrie or whatever her name is, i assure you she’ll only be here for a little bit.”

“i’m worried about her, yeah, but not in the way you assume i am.” you mumbled.

“i don’t know why you’d be worried, she’s not going to take your spot in hodge’s eyes.”

as izzy reached for the brush, you crack a smile. you were always hodge’s favorite, so, no, you’d never be worried about it.

“what do you mean ‘googly eyed’?” you asked curiously, pinching yourself in the wrist as you asked the question in regret.

“you didn’t see it? she’s like, totally in love with jace,” izzy smiled and grabbed the curler.

your heart drops to your feet.

“jace seems to like her, too. he’s worried about her all the time, he’s the one who brought her here… it’s love at first sight if you ask me. dontcha think?”

you swallowed. you wanted to cover your ears and scream until izzy shut up, but you couldn’t. “yeah, i do.” you tried to hide the shakiness in your voice.

“they’d be cute together. especially with the height difference. i don’t know if you got a good look at her, but she’s your height. short-”

you tried not to roll your eyes.

izzy sighed before continuing. “and it’s a power couple. she seems innocent. not much like a badass. but we both know jace, on the other hand.”

you forced a laugh. “yeah.”

“now that i think about it, you and clary are similar. really similar, actually. you guys would get along.”

you bit your lip. in this moment, you wanted to tell izzy all about your love for jace, but it wasn’t worth it. there was no point. you swallowed. “maybe, yeah.”

izzy finished with your hair and moved on to makeup. later, you found yourself wearing an extremely short dress and thigh high boots. you had to walk to the party and you walked alongside jace, it was the one time he wasn’t all over clary that day and you just wanted to hear his laugh and to laugh at his jokes.

but now, today, the pages of your favorite book tickles at your fingertips as you stare at the worlds sputtered along them, your brain not registering a simple thing.

“that book must not be very interesting.” you hear from behind you, scaring you out of your daydream.

“jace!” you exclaim.

“really? is that me?” he jokes sarcastically.

you giggle and playfully slap him in the shoulder. “shut up.”

“what book is it?”

“never mind the book, what are you doing in here?”

the blonde lets out a breath, flopping onto your bed. “boredddd.”

you’re taken aback at this. calmly as you can, you say your response carefully so it’s not sarcastic. “where’s clary?”

“what does clary have to do with my boredom?”

you almost laugh at this. “nothing, you’ve just been all over her yesterday and this morning, i thought you guys would be in a closet making out or something.”

jace’s expression drops as he feels his heart stop. his breath hitched. “why are you being like that?”

you close your book. “like what?”

“look, just because i have a heart-”

you immediately lunge forward and feel his chest area where his heart is. you try to pretend that it isn’t beating crazily fast at the distance between the two of your faces.

“not there.”

jace can’t hide his laugh. “yeah, okay. well, just because i have a heart and want to help someone out, doesn’t mean i’m in love with them! and anyway, why is it such a big deal if i were in love with her?”

“is that you admitting that you do?”

“no! answer my fucking question!” he demands.

you swallow, feeling defeated. “it’s not that. she’s taking up all of your time and i literally don’t get to see you anymore.”

you walk to your bookshelf and put your book in. keeping your cool was getting harder and harder by the moment.

“well i’m offering now?” he says, but it sounds like he’s questioning it.

“and then? what about tomorrow?” you put your hair behind your ear, reaching for a gold ring.

“what’s that?” jace gets off of your bed and points to the ring.

“remember when we were kids and you gave me a promise ring that one day we’d get married?” your voice cracks as you place the ring on your finger. “it was sweet at first, but…”

as you pull the ring off your finger, jace is quick to push it back on.

you feel the heat in your cheeks rising, going crazy. you swallow and look into his eyes.

he sighs, removing his hands from yours. “get ready, we’ll leave in a bit. and if you’re so obsessed with clary, i’ll ask her to come. you guys will get along.”

he walks out of the room leaving you blushing and confused.

~ clary is all over you, she thinks you’re the coolest person to ever exist.

“your hair looks really pretty, too.” she says, brushing her fingers through it.

“thanks, izzy curled it last night.” you try to hide the annoyance in your voice.

the cab car was extremely hot. the driver had a passenger in the front seat, so the three of you—jace, clary, you— had undid your appearance runes and you were basically hitch hiking without the driver or the passenger knowing.

jace to the left of you and clary to the right.

if you were being honest, you didn’t want to be sitting next to him after what happened earlier. was he trying to say that he still wanted to marry you after all the years?

“oh, please, stop fighting over me, girls!” jace jokes sarcastically. clary cracks up, but for once, you don’t laugh at his joke. he notices this and raises an eyebrow.

“so, clary, where’s your mundane friend?” you ask curiously, starting to think you were wrong about her at first.

“oh, he’s with izzy. she said she’ll take care of him while we go out.” clary looks out the window, admiring the city.

“right.” you turn to your left to find that jace was already staring at you, his gaze low at the hem of your dress.

you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t like the way you looked and felt in the dress and makeup you wore yesterday. you decided that before you headed back to the institute, you and izzy could go shopping. you found a ton of short dresses you bought without even trying on, of course.

“what’s up?” you say, staring at jace, his eyes dancing along the hem.

he shoot’s his head up, caught in the act. you smile to yourself. “you’re wearing makeup, aren’t you?”

you bite back a grin. “izzy gave me a bit, she said it looked pretty on me.”

jace doesn’t seem amused. “i think you look better without it.”

you don’t know if that’s a compliment, but you find yourself with a stupid grin plastered on your face as you watch the scenery outside of clary’s window.

“where are we going, by the way?” clary whispers.

“shit.” jace gasps as he grabs your hand, making you instinctively grab clary’s. he opens the door on his side and the driver stops the car, going to see why the door opened and you start running.

you and clary are cracking up at how concentrated jace is as he turns the corner.

“where are we going?!?” you repeat clary’s question from earlier as you start going down a hill.

“hodge used to take us there,” he turns to face you, who has no clue where he plans on going. you raise an eyebrow with crossed arms. “don’t start with the ‘oh, he used to take us everywhere!’ shit, we went a few times every week.”

you smile. you never realized how much of a father hodge acted as, your parents had died in a battle against vampires, and jace’s parents— no one really knew much about.

“i don’t know!” you squeal.

jace squeezes your hand a little tighter and angrily pushes past a crowd of people who jump at the feeling of being pushed but nothing to be pushed by. after blushing over this, you turn to clary who shrugs at jace’s random anger.

“are we going to see dorothea?” you gasp when you realize and jace giggles.

“dorothea?” clary asks, a little alarmed. “that’s my neighbor!”

“you live next to dorothea?” jace asks after turning around to face clary.

you see tension. you can practically feel it. it makes you sick to your stomach. clary’s going to take this moment to bond with jace, when you and him have been coming here since you were little.

“s-she’s— yes.” clary struggles, looking down at her feet.

“she’s yes?” jace laughs at her own joke. you force a laugh to get out of the rearview.

“i knew i recognized this street,” clary whispers to you as you turn the corner.

“okay.” you don’t even want to talk to her anymore. sure, it wasn’t her fault that she lives next to dorothea, but it was almost completely obvious she got nervous when jace got a little too close to her. you clear your throat. “jace, we’re here.”

jace was staring at the ground and he picks his head up without saying anything and turns back to you and clary.

“have you got a key?” he asks clary.

clary is still bright red as she nods, but she puts her hand under the mat on the porch and puts it through the keyhole.

“after you.” jace smiles brightly as he opens the door for you and clary.

you go in before her, jace takes notice to how you cut her off to get in front.

once the three of you are inside, you start to look around. it’s like a regular apartment building, budget was probably sixty thousand on the minimum interior decorating.

jace walks over to the first door on the first floor and knocks.

“shoo, put my mail at the door of my door!” you hear from inside. you look at jace and smile, who smiles back. this gives you major butterflies.

jace knocks again.

“disobeying bastards!” you hear dorothea yell from inside before the door opens and you get a clear view of her. she didn’t age, she was already really old. she looked the same.

“oh my lord!” she exclaims before extending her arms to jace and pulling him in a hug. jace doesn’t really appreciate physical touch that isn’t formed by him, but he accepts it because it’s dorothea. “jace, boy, you’ve gotten so big!”

she turns to you and extends her arms. “and hello, y/n… you’re still small and fragile…”

she chuckles to herself, but you can’t help but feel a little offended.

jace knows how you feel about this, so he rubs your back comfortingly.

“and clary…” she looks at her unamused and then opens the door completely so you all can walk in.

her place has remained the same over the years. not a single book, even, has moved.

you linger closer to jace as you tour her one-bedroom which seems to make him uncomfortable. like you’re following him.

dorothea smiles as she takes a seat at her table. “jace, y/n, come sit.”

you and jace look at each other. then you follow him to the table she’s sitting at as clary explores the room.

“oh, i can’t believe how long it’s been…” she says, looking teary eyed.

“twelve years.” you say, trying not to make it obvious you’re uncomfortable. the situation is awkward.

dorothea stares at you blankly. “you look so beautiful, dear.”

“uh, thanks… izzy let me borrow some makeup.”

if you were being honest, jace looked pissed. it was stupid he thought he could control how you lived.

“she still looks beautiful without it.” he says, facing dorothea. he doesn’t even shoot a second glance towards you.

your cheeks grow red rapidly, and you try not to smile. “thanks.”

jace crosses his arms.

dorothea smiles wildly at the two of you. “you two still plan on getting married? you’re together, right?”

you and jace look at each other and clary stops. she wants to see what he says.

then jace’s gaze moves to your ring and you feel like you’re about to explode.

jace then turns to dorothea. “maybe. i don’t know.”

you look to the side and jace doesn’t shoot a second glance to you.

is that why he gave you the ring? he still wants to marry you? like he did as a little boy?

“that’s wonderful, your babies would be beautiful you know?” dorothea clasps her hands and stands up. “well unfortunately you came at a bad time. i was just getting ready for bed, but don’t let that stop you. feel free to loiter, i suppose. i really did miss you children. and it was nice to see you, clary.”

she really doesn’t care about clary though, which makes you feel happy for some reason. like you won.

“y/n, you sure you don’t want to go home and go to bed?” jace asks with a smirk.

“shut up, jace. you never used to tease me about that. you always defended me for it.” you don’t know why you said it, but once it was out of your mouth, you felt you spoke the truth. you just wish it wasn’t in front of dorothea.

“i’m just joking,” jace laughs and clary is cracking up from beside you.

you have to finish what you started. “joking? but isn’t that what alec and izzy did? hell, even magnus!”

dorothea realized she wasn’t welcome in this argument and had made her way to the other room for bed. you shoot a glance at jace that says ‘bring this outside’ but not in a friendly manner.

jace grabs your hand and rushes you outside, leaving clary standing there, confused.

“you NEED to stop, okay?” jace spits, holding you by the shoulders.

“i’m sorry, are you angry i’m finally standing up to you and your obsession with clary?” as you said this, you kept getting up in his face. this didn’t please him in the slightest. he didn’t want to want to kiss you ask you SCREAMED at him.

“stand up for yourself some other fucking time! right now, we just came to see dorothea— i just BROUGHT you to see dorothea and you’re being an ungrateful fucking brat, you know that?”

you shouldn’t. you shouldn’t be blushing at his words. they’re not coming out in the sense you would blush at them, so why are you?

“jace..” you feel every wall within you fall. every hope and dream is shattered. “i’m done waiting for you.”

“waiting for me? waiting for me to do what?” his tone immediately dropped asks he felt his heart shatter.

your gaze is followed by jace’s when you look down at your hand and slowly slip the promise ring off of your finger. “i’m done waiting.”

you try to walk away, so he doesn’t see you cry, but he grabs you. he pulls you back in front of him and immediately attaches his lips to yours. you melt into the kiss as soon as he does it, your hands going around his neck while his travel to your waist. it was perfect. this was perfect.

after a good long moment, you come up for air, the first to pull away. you entangle your fingers in his hair and push your forehead onto his. “jace… you can’t.”

another part in jace shatters, but he doesn’t know what it is. “i can’t? i can’t what?”

you can’t help but look at his lips. pink already, and you’d only kissed for a good twenty seconds. you wonder if yours are like that. “we can’t do this. us.”

“what? why not?”

“because you love her.” you look towards the house, to dorothea’s room where clary was watching you through the window.

he chuckles and kisses you on the lips again, this time for longer. when he pulls away, he cups your face with his hand. “just you. only you. always you.”

which makes your heart explode. that was something you said to each other all the time as kids, and you can’t believe he remembered it.

“i’ve always loved you, y/n. did you think my promise ring was some kind of joke?”

[reijixia13]

Believe in Me

||°|| KNY Oneshot ||°||

》Smile even if it's Pain ✍︎Kagaya Ubuyashiki

✍︎𝐒𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐧

✍︎𝐾𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑦𝑎 𝑈𝑏𝑢𝑦𝑎𝑠ℎ𝑖𝑘𝑖

✍︎Oneshots

⚠︎Angst⚠︎

⚠︎Mugen Train Movie and Chapter spoiler!⚠︎

Note: This is made by me, So it would be unpleasant if anyone dare to take this hard working plot twists and scenes i tried to make. This also came from my wattpad book named Reiji_13 so pls visit it:>

❄︎POV

It was just any other day.. Well only if those screams are quite.. I mean someone's giving birth so no one's gonna lie. So here we are telling a story of a Waiting Kagaya in the waiting room hearing the screams of his wife giving birth to there first born child this generation, We await as the screams loosen and turned quite.

Cry..

All can kagaya hear was a babies cry.. If you now look closely you can imagine how he's starting to cry his eyes out imagining how incredible it was to have his dream finally came true, And that is having a family of his own.

Kagaya was called out at the room where Amane, his wife gave birth, As he came is he saw an almost passed out Amane, Looking at her arms was a baby and standing beside her was a doctor smiling softly at the head of the house.

"Congratulations Oyakata-Sama, It's a baby Girl. Look's like she's healthy and doesn't seem any problem, What would you like to name her?"

The doctor asked waiting for Kagaya's answer.

"(Y/N).. Ubuyashiki (Y/N)"

Kagaya answered with a smile, The doctor nodded before leaving the room for the three people to have time, Kagaya walked to his wife and soothing his wife's hair, before taking the little baby gently to his arms as he let Amane get her rest.

"Welcome to the world.. My dear

(Y/N).."

And from that day on.. A healthy girl was born, Few months had passed the baby is nothing more but energetic and bubbly little girl.

The problem is.. Amane tried to took the responsibility of taking care of there child only for the head of the family to refuse gently, Amane had nothing to do but sigh but with a smile.

Even tho The two parents had been arranged they do love each other, Adding the new member of the family it doesn't stop anything else to stop there happiness.

𝙺𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚢𝚊 𝚡 𝙳𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚎𝚛!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

Request by: _chillandnetflix_

A/N: this took uhmm 6 days thinking because I was trying to find a reason on how the reader died so heheheehhe.

Hench that make that a week lol

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was looking at a beautiful piece of petal I had collected along from my long mission, it was nice petal I had found it's still bright as always and it's my lucky charm after I found it.

I had never told anyone about this kind of flower as in though they will hate it as it had never died.



Oh if you didn't know, Ohayo~ My name is Ubuyashiki (Y/N) Im the Moonlight Snow Hashira. Im one of the most respected hashira as to why is because of my father being the head of the family and leader of the Survey Im currently in.

"(Y/N)-Sama, The trial is about to start!" A kakushi called out, snapping me out of my introducing thoughts.

"Ah- Yes I'll be right there" I said, I closed my locket of lucky charm before I proceeded to stand up. The Kakushi asked me if They could assist me only for me to refuse, I like walking and talking to my dear friends Kakushi's but I think there too nervous to even breath in the same sight at me. I sighed at the thoughts as I look to the sides.

"(Y/N)-Sama!" A few various of voiced called out to me, I look toward the voices to see my fellow comrades. I smiled softly at the sight of them before I noticed a boy on the floor.

"Hello, Hmm? Why is there a boy on the ground?" I asked confused, Uzui answered my question.

"Ah- His the boy who broke the rule the one who brought a demon with him" Uzui said before He could continue I was infront of the conscious boy.

I smiled down at him, I reach my hand to help him stand up straight but my reaching hand was stopped by Obanai.

"Oi! Keep your head bowed down that's Oyakata-Sama's Eldest Daughter!" Obanai yelled at the poor boy as he put a foot in his head, I slightly glare at him but to think I grew up at my mature and kind father I don't think you saw the glare.

"Obanai-San, That's still a boy" I said, I slightly and gently move him around, He didn't stop me as I helped the boy that has a very familiar earing, and a very familiar hair. "Daijoubodesu?" I asked politely at the boy, He looked rather nervous but as he met my eyes he relaxed.

"Nezuko.. Did you see Nezuko?!" He suddenly yelled making me jump back a little at the sudden yell, "please! Believe me Nezuko never devoured a human!" He yelled, He was again tackled by no other than Obanai Iguro himself...Again.

"Oi!" He warned by yelling, I just sighed at whatever is happening until I was greeted by a big.....deadly...Bone crushing..Hug.

"(Y/N)-Sama!!! Your cute as always!!kyaaaaa!" Mitsuri said as she (death) 'hugged' me, As if Im calling to the gods my savior came.

"Mitsuri-Chan, (Y/N)-Sama can't breath!!" I heard the so angelic voice of the Butterfly pillar, Shinabou. And suprise surprise another savior!

"Uhuh! Mitsuri you should let go now, (Y/N)-Sama Daijoubodesuka?" Rengoku asked as he pulled me away from my reaper, He smiled down at me with those sunny sun burning smile like always.

"Hn..Daijoubo" I answered him with a soft smile while titling my head to the side, I look around a bit more before I noticed Giyuu was far far away, "Tomioka-San? Why are you so far away?" I asked, He looked at me before he shamelessly looked down at the ground. Before I could talk I heard my sister and brother announced that Father has come. Choruses of Good Afternoons and my Father's well being started.

"Hello my dear children, Is the sky blue today? I hope you all are doing ok" Father said as he sitted himself at the porch with my litte siblings beside him. I suddenly heard Sanemi yelled, Looking at his direction before gasping at the sight, His arm has a big cut and the box that I would guess has the demon girl, nezuko was bleeding.

"Forgive me, Oyakata-sama for my rudeness" I hear him say, as he jump recklessly at the room that was behind my father and siblings, He kicked the box before calling out at the demon. "Let me all show you how demons should be" he said as the demon....... That's no way.....That demon is too cute to be a demon...

I stop myself from going to hug another random child that be 100 meters away so I wouldn't kill it like how Mitsuri almost kill me with her hugs.

"No! Nezuko! NEZUKO IS HUMAN! SHE NEVER DEVOUR A SINGLE PERSON!" Tanjiro's yell was heard through the yard, He stood carelessly infront of my father before yelling at Sanemi, "MY SISTER WON'T KILL OR EAT ANYONE AND I'LL MAKE SURE OF THAT!" He yelled again, We all look at the scene happening, before I magically appear behind him and wanting to just do whatever did Obanai had done to shut him self up, When it comes to my Father he should respect him more.

"(Y/N), Don't you lay a hand at Tanjiro-San" My father said and looked at me, I put my hand down quickly I can sense someone's aura of disappointment and disbelief.

I just seated myself at the porch next to my father waiting for whatever is happening.

~Time skil cause I think my brain is gonna pop after 4 days of thingking of whatever is going to happend~

The trial has ended earlier after that father started a meeting before announcing another meeting later tonight.

I walk myself at the Butterfly Estate where people that are injured was held, I walk in before going to the yard, I saw Kanao hanging out with the Butterflies again. I smiled sadly at the memory that came to my mind, Kanao was a successor of Shinabou because after Kanae had died, Shinabou had turned the flower estate a butterfly one before she turned Kanao as her new successor. Both held the pain in there hearts, keeping both there smile to place that there fine but they weren't. Kanae is someone you could trust, She was once my Bestfriend and she will always will be.. it's just.. It's hard to let her go even after all this years..

Kanao noticed me and simply bowed, I walk up to her and hugged her, Something I do often so I guess she was used to it. I patted her head before pulling away with a smile.

"Stay strong Ka-Chan" I said and patted her head again before waving at her with a smile, I walk in again to look for the boy with a sister of a cute hella demon angel.

As I walk through the Estate I came across Aoi, As she noticed me she bowed down.

"Aoi-Chan, Have you seen the new patients? I would like to talk with one of them" I said and titled my head to the side, She nodded her head respectfully.

"Yes (Y/N)-OneeSama, There just that two doors after a few steps. I hope it's not that crazy blond" She said and bowed, She mumble the last part before she walked away with another full basket of laundry. I shrugged her statement of before going to the room she ment.

Once I was there all I see is!

Hench this

Why y'all still here?

Can't you see that all you see with this people are chaos?

Ok fudge that just continue

Yeah, chaos, I sweatdrop at what is happening, Shinabou was talking to Kamado, The Yellow bowl cutted boy, and a... Wth? Is that a pig boy? I shook my head through the insanely brain I have.

"Ara? (Y/N)-Sama, what can I do for you?" Shinabou noticed me as to finally and asked me, the three boys looked at my direction before I walk to kamado. "Ah- Ok you want to Kamado-Kun?" I nodded as I turn towards Shinabou with a smile, "Ok, I'll be on my way, Call me if you need something (Y/N)-Sama" Shinabou said with a smile and bowed before she excused herself and left the room.

"S-Sama?!" I turn around to see a boy with bowl cutted bangs yelled, Why are they still screaming its giving me a headache. I ignore him for a moment so I could just talk my purpose on as to why im here.

"Are you alright now, Kamado-San? If you need help anything you could come to my Estate." I said as I smiled softly at him, "Ah!- right, Can I see you're sister? I would love to meet her in a good way" I said as I took Tanjiro's hand clasping it into mine, My expression is always the same, I love meeting youngins but it's my very first time to meet a Demon with an Aura of a Human!

"A-ano.... She's resting right now..." Tanjiro answered in a concern way

"Oh.." My mood suddenly gone to 100% to 25% Im sad before bringing it back to 80% "Well then! She should rest well! If you need anything, Just ask me" I said and smiled at Tanjiro, I look to either of his side to the Yellow bowled hair boy and to the one with the pig one, "You guys aswell, Call me if you guys meed anything. I would be happy to help you all!"

"Arigatou (Y/N)-Sama" Tanjiro said, I put a hand on Tanjiro's head before patting it.

"Ara? Don't follow what our comrades calls me, Calle me Oneechan" I said with a smile, "Oneechan is better that being called sama you all are making me old" I said with a tiny giggle.

"A..." Me and Tanjiro heard a bit but not full so we turned around to the voice, "A GODDESS GIGGLED!" The guy with yellow hair said as he tried yo jump but I was suprised when Aoi was there to block him.

"Oi do not disrespect (Y/N)-Sama" Aoi scolded with a bit of boink in the head, I quickly stifle a laugh before going to the boar haired guy, I patted his head as well.

"Get well soon You need to be strong hmm k? Boarhead-San please do eat alot too, You look really strong for a young boy" I said, His mood suddenly change I can feel it.

"Hah? You calling me weak? And the names Great King Inosuke not Boarhed!" He weakly yelled while he introduced, I smiled and patted once again before Im about to walk away.

"Then do please get well soon Great King Inosuke" I said and turned around with a smile, I walk away from jis bed passed Tanjiro before I stood infront of the yellow hair guy, "You too, You should rest well. You shouldn't fight the person taking care of you, We're all trying to make you all get better. So get well soon" I said with a smile, He looked like about to cry, I reached my hand to pat him in the head.

"Zenitsu.." He said, I stopped titling my head and looked at him. "Zenitsu is my name.... (Y/N)-San" He said and looked at the ground.

"Please, Call me Oneechan, Why do you all have to call me so formally? I don't care what ground I stood All I care is all of the new generation's healthcare" I said with a smile and patted his head, I soon walked away from the group and towards the door, Turning around I bowed, "Get well soon, Tanjiro, Zenitsu and Inosuke" I said and smiled before walking out the door.

~~~(2355 words wow that's the reason it too so long omfg-)~~~~

Meeting has ended, I was the only one in my Father's meeting room my head on his lap as he soothed my (h/l).

"Father?" I called out to him, He responded with a hum, "Do you think Tanjiro and the others will defeat Him?" I asked, Turning to face upwards to my fathers face who looked down on me with his infamous soft smile that captive all of us.

"Im sure of it, Even If it means losing one another's life, I know and surely do. We will defeat him cause that's his fate" He said, He took one hold on my hand as I look into his Violet eyes. "I don't even know why you always want to follow your friends path but It is also dangerous for you, Im also worried that one day..." He paused before he was tearing up a little, I jolted up from his lap and into a embrace.

"Father it's not gonna happend!" I yelled out tears pricking out my eyes, "Im not gonna give up my Duty! I wanna protect you and Mom and my Sisters and brother. I wanna save the people who suffered even if they're the enemies, cause they're once humans too.." I said and clunched at my father, "I promised, I promised to be strong and fight for all of us" I said as I cried into his arms, He patted my back and looked at my face, Even if his blind he can still look at me with those Fatherly Love eyes.

"I know.. I always have fate in you.." He said and hugged me, I hugged back until I fell asleep.

3rd POV (look who decided to change the pov HAHAHAHAHAH)

(Y/N) fell asleep in Kagaya's arms after a little bit of They're crying session Someone knocked on the door, kagaya let out a soft and quiet 'come in' as the person came in. It was his wife.

"(N/N) fell asleep? Haa this girl.. Sometimes she's just like his father who always put others lives first before himself" Amane said as she took the hand of her husband, "Haa.. I wish we all could just stay like this forever" She said as she leans her sholder at Kagaya who leaned his head on her head.

"I know.. but Until then we have to fight" Kagaya said with a soft smile, Amane smiled back, Both watching they're young but eldest daughter sleep like she used to when she didn't have siblings back years ago.

~~~~~~~

From that very own they all wished they could all just be happy like how every people should have been, But the world is too cruel and God has not granted the wish they could of had.

~~~~~~

"Join me Flame Pillar Rengoku and Daughter of Ubuyashiki, I'll help you have immortal life, Let me bring you to my master." A demon, Akaza who has the uppermoon 3 said as he extends his hands to the both Flame pillar and the young but Elder girl's.

"I will not join you, My life and duty are always my goal but I will never come with you!" Rengoku yelled as he suddenly jumped to attack Akaza who dodged.

"Then what about you? The royal and daughter of Ubuyashiki? Why don't you join me, Be Immortal Join Us!" Akaza yelled at (Y/N) who deadly looked at his eyes.

"I promised I will be strong! I promised I'll be there to the people who needs a person the most! BUT MY LOYALTY IS ALWAYS ON MY FAMILY WHO STOOD THERE BY MY SIDE AND I WILL END YOU ALL RIGHT NOW!" She yelled, Akaza's eyes suddenly wided as he noticed how gracefully she dance.

"The Sun Breathing日ひの呼こ吸きゅう  Raging Sun (烈れつ日じつ紅こう鏡きょう, Retsujitsu Kōkyō,  lit. "Scorching Crimson Mirror" !!"

She yelled as she dashed to Akaza and to his nect but was dodge only yo cut an arm, Sliced Well, Clear and clean.

"WHAT THE?!" Akaza yelled out, Rengoku took another chance to move once again only to be punched in the side of the head.

"The Sun Breathing 日ひの呼こ吸きゅう, Hi no kokyū  Fire Wheel 火か車しゃ, Kasha, lit. "Fire Chariot" !!" (Y/N) dashed again and again using whatever she learn from the memory of ancestors of Sun Breathing she remembers.

As her sword was about to hit Akaza's head, He suddenly jumped down making her stumbled feom the train roof and on the the ground rolling down at it. She stumbled to stand up only to feel the painful feeling on her leg, It was sprained but since the train was also crush she was injured mostly on the head as her head was impact with the hard ground.

She look at Tanjiro who was running after Akaza's, She watched as he throws it but she can't see if it hit the Uppermoon as her eye lids started to feel more heavily damaged ready to put her to her sleeps. She suddenly feel herself was put on someone's arms, She looked up at the person to see Rengoku Kyojuro who was badly injured as her. She watched and heard a little of what the both the her Fellow Hashira and Tanjiro talked as tears pecked her eyes.

"Tanjiro, I believe in your sister and I know (Y/N) as well.. She envied you. But now our duty is done.. Take care hmm k?

Stand tall and be proud. No matter how weak or unworthy you feel, set your heart ablaze, grit your teeth and move forward. If you just curl up in a ball and hide, time will pass you by. It won't stop for you while you wallow in your grief." Kyojuro said, He looked down and smiled at (Y/N) who smile back, she turns a little to look at Tanjiro.

"Tanjiro..Inosuke..Zenitsu and Nezuko.. Just so you all know, I Believe in you guys with all my heart.... I love to spend more time with you all but maybe next time will be better haha.." (Y/N) laughed a little before she looked at the sky, "Nee Tanjiro Smile even if its pain and.... Can you say to my Father that, The sky is blue today.. Beautiful as always... Flowers are always blooming.... And.." She turned to Tanjiro again to see him crying his eyes out as He watched her only Big Sister figure slowly dieng at the arms of his mentor, "Tell them In the next Life, We all will Have a peaceful life.. Tell all of our Comrades I Love Them" she sadly smile before her eyes slowly see and litted, She can see her Ancestors, Yoriichi. Her best mentor and guardian who stood by her like always.. she smiled once again before taking her neckless.. "Nee.. Tanjiro.. Will you take care of this?" She passed her trembling hands to Tanjiro who shakily took her hands into his before feeling her arms heavy and watched as the hand was bounced down the ground. "Gommene.. Oto-san Go..mme..ne.......Sayo...nar..ra.."

"(Y/N)-Neechan.." Tanjiro watched as both they're mentor and Sister Figure smiled softly with a few tears from they're eyes escape in there long awaited sleep.. "(Y/N)-Neesama!! Rengoku-San!! AAAAAAAAHHHHH" Tanjiro screamed as his welling eyes couldn't stop.

"Shut up.." Tanjiro looked at Inosuke who has tears running down his boar mask, "SHUT THE HELL UP! THEY SAID WE SHOULD BE STRONG! THEY SAID THEY BELIEVE IN US SO WHY WASTE YOUR TEARS IN THIS DEAD PEOPLE! THEY SAID FIGHT! COME ON AAAAAAHHHH" Tanjiro only watched as he was being tried to drag and being smacked by a crying Inosuke.

'Please.. let us meet again next time (Y/N)-Neechan.. Arigatou.. Rest in peace both of you'

-Tanjiro

'(Y/N)-Nee, I peomise I'll be as strong as you and you'll see me once again and we'll fight! So in the mean time wait for me……'

-Inosuke

Zenitsu who came in the scene who came before (Y/N) and Rengoku's last breath stood there with the box in who's inside was Nezuko as he stumbled to the ground looking at all of they're sister figure.

The person who sworn they're loyalty.

The person who Believed.

'Im sorry,Im always scared, (Y/N)-Neechan.. IM SORRY I COULDN'T PROTECT YOU'

-Zenitsu

'Oneechan...Oneechan.....Gommene...

Nezuko couldn't protect you..Gommene'

-Nezuko

~~~~At this point Im crying my eyes out so like what the heck happend on my idea to make y'all cry?~~~~

2 kasugai Crows flew away from they're owner with tears in they're eyes as well going back where all of they're fellow Crows where.

"Kaw..Kaw.. Flame Hashira Rengoku Kyoujuro has collected his last breath and has been killed by Uppermoon 3 kaw..kaaw.." The Kasugai Crow owned by Rengoku announced as some of the crows there looked at them shocked.

"Kaw kaw, The Eldest Daughter and the MoonLight Snow Hashira Ubuyashiki

(Y/N) has took her last breath with the Sun of Breath and been killed by Uppermoon 3 kaw..." The kasugai crow of (Y/N) announced making alk the crows flew out to deliever all both the former owners of the announcers messages to their own owner with tears building up of their own.

Even the crows are sad to lose their former care taker who they wished to protect but.. what could crows like them do?

~~~~~~~

(Y/N)'s former crow flew to the Ubuyashiki Estate who was waiting calmly at the porch, All the Ubuyashiki gathered as the Crow of their Eldest Daughter and Older Sister's crow stumble to even fly right, kiriya who was close to the crow help it and took it at his hands before taking it up to his father.

The crow who looked at the family with full of sadness and regret.

Time seems to stop as the Ubuyashiki family stood there with building river of tears in their eyes

"Ubuyashiki (Y/N) was killed by Uppermoon 3 and lost her breath at the Sun of Breath forms" the Kasugai crow flew away letting them all have they're moments before crying itself far away from the family.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ok that's  where Im gonna end it, Hope y'all  cry because Im alittle cruel to try this idea for like 2 weeks, this took uhhhhh 4172 words thank you very much.

I think I might do an Aftermath of this sooner or later, PLEASE DO NOT WASTE THIS IT TOOK ME 2 WEEKS FOR MY BRAIN TO WORK AND I HAVE TO A BOX OF TISSUE FEOM MY SNOTS AND TEARS THAT ARE COMING OUT HUHU

sorry if this was late lol my poor hands lol😭😭