#if my mom tried hiding the fact i was a witch from me at 13 yeah id disobey her and be annoying about it too

[clamorybus]

this is the silliest complaint, but im honestly surprised by how many reviewers side with miss piper about hiding their cromwell witch ancestry from her kids

[musubiki]

What was mochi’s exact moment of being in love with lime? We know that like got hit with the truck of feels when mochi started showing Thigh™ but what about childhood crushing mochi?

Also funny if the mob spell keeping mochi on the down low took a dramtic dip in effectiveness when she started showing Thigh™

i think there was a time where he saved her from some bullies in middle school!!! actually it used to be "saved her from being bullied," but since the mob spell development,.., i think the more probable scenario is that mochi tried to help someone else from being bullied (lime didnt care to interfere), but when they turned on her, THEN he stepped in. middle school lime was a bit of a punk so he got into his first REAL fight there. black eye and everything. he won though (mochi high five) and they all got sent to the principles office

that was also the turning point for their friendship pretty much!! because before it was like "ugh the weird girl across the street" / "that jerk who put dirt in my backpack and calls me names" (with an odd sense of camaraderie because its the orders(tm) from the parents that they walk home together and watch out for each other)

but after this event its better between them..,.. mochi thought what he did was cool and starts bringing him sweets from the cat cafe, and limes like "Maybe shes not so bad."

anyway thats when mochi first started to like him!! it was that weird middle school type crush where they seem so cool and you daydream about them being a cool prince and you feel awkward talking to them but still want to be around them as much as possible.

and it just never went away. in fact she tried to ignore it and also didnt tell her mom about it because she knew about the whole witch-love thing, and she didnt want her mom to start separating them (which she definitely would have to prevent mochi having a huge weakness right away)

and obviously over time it got worse. WAY worse when he hit puberty. middle school lime was an average kid. maybe one of those kids that you go "Oh he looks like he'll be cute when he grows up!" but puberty hit him like a fucking TRUCK. got way too tall and handsome way too fast!!! AND with time he also got more and more comfortable with her so he spent more time teasing her. but luckily at the same rate mochi was developing her early witch skills(tm) so she was still good at hiding her feelings (thank god. especially since hed throw in the occasional flirty line to mess with her. a weaker woman would have folded)

and on the side note of the mob spell dipping with mochis shorter skirt: IT DIDNT!!!!!! which is why lime thought he was losing his damn mind!!!!! hes all hot and bothered and no one else seems to give a shit hes like "????? is it just me???" and everyone else is like "is it just you what?"

but i think limes feelings didnt start with the thigh thing, it actually started with the cuddle thing. that time she spent a night or two at his house (first sleepover in forever since tiramisu banned it when they were around 13) and one way or another they fell asleep together, and when lime wakes up to mochi cuddled into his arms hes like "Oh boy....thats not bad actually..." and little did he know admitting that to himself opened a floodgate that he locked shut for years and years

[nightcolorz]

🧡☀️🌾

aaa thanks for sending me an ask <3 u guys r in for smth very detailed and personal lol. SO SORRY ABOUT HOW LONG THIS IS 😭

🧡 - How has the way you presented yourself (ex. Clothing, hairstyle, etc.) changed since you realized you were queer?

This is a slightly complicated question for me bcus realizing I was queer and coming out was a pretty drawn out process, I suppose bcus being transgender entails a lot of complications that other queer identities don’t really. I realized I was queer when I was 10, realized I was FTM transgender specifically when I was eleven, came out when I was 12, started socially transitioning when I had just turned 13, and started medically transitioning a few months before I turned 14. And all of these phases entailed their own lil changes in self expression + presentation. I’m going to try my best to keep it short, lol. During the phase in my life where I knew I was trans, had come out, but wasn’t allowed to transition bcus of my circumstances, I dressed like shit. My mom didn’t think it’d be safe for me to transition bcus I lived in a pretty conservative environment and she wasn’t sure how she’d go about that. I was very depressed, I felt horribly trapped. I did the hard part (came out) and got none of the benefits I thought I would. The people in my life behaved as if me coming out had never happened. So I payed no mind to my appearance, I dressed in huge oversized hoodies and sweatpants everyday to school, and right when I got home I’d change into pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt. I did pass relatively well, I had a short haircut and a natural bit of facial hair above my lip because of my Hispanic genes, but the fact that I was oftentimes gendered correctly by strangers didn’t help much. It felt like a smack in the face, almost. That time in my life was probably the time I was the most visibly queer. It wasn’t a good year or so. But! Eventually, my family was forced to move, which my mom looks back on as a miracle in disguise. I was allowed to transition then, I started attending a more progressive school where no one knew me. Bullying became less of a concern with a clean slate where I could be whoever I wanted to be. I was then thrust into an environment where I’d be assumed by peers to be a cisgender boy, which was, um, a journey. I was stealth, at least I tried very hard to be, and despite the progressiveness of staff the kids were..less so. I had no idea how to present myself at first, I came off as very weird and got bullied pretty bad. But after a bit, especially since I started medically transitioning, I really got my act together. I had cut out a very defined style for myself. I was really into wearing what the kids call “dark academy” clothing. I wore sweaters, turtlenecks, my grandpa got me a trench coat for my 14th birthday which I was very excited about. I’m very thankful for being able to transition so early, so that now that I’m much older I’m pretty much past my awkward queer experimentation stage. I now dress similarly to how I did growing up, but now I’m much less worried about “passing” and I try to wear clothes that make me happy rather then conceal my body. I’m finally at a stage in my life where I’m happy and comfortable in my body and don’t mind showing it off. I think I have a ways to go still when it comes to self expression, I still have some trauma left over from the hell that was getting queer witch hunted as the weird kid who was rumored to be trans, but I’m moving in the right direction. I’m trying not to hide so much now! Also, I’ve gotten over some anxiety I’ve had throughout my life about not “acting masculine enough”, which has also greatly improved my self confidence and happiness.

☀️ - Is there anyone who helped you accept that you were queer? If so, who? Exploring the internet as a youngin was what introduced me to what the lgbtq community actually was. (Don’t let the transphobes who think trans kids are getting indoctrinated online get their hands on this 😭). But yes I was indoctrinated online by fanfiction.net and tumblr. Hilariously enough, the thing I used the internet for exclusively as a child was indulging in Harry Potter fan content, and the Harry Potter fandom was what introduced me to queerness and transness, leading to my realization that this was what I’d been feeling all my life. Suck it jkr! When it comes to people in my real life, I had a stereotypical weird girl best friend during the period where I knew I was trans but didn’t tell anyone, who was into warrior cats and openly lesbian. She opened my eyes to the fact that I wasn’t the only queer kid my age, let alone queer person in the world. I never ended up coming out to her, though I considered it often, but we did have some very stunted and awkward conversations about queer identity. I like to think she knew. Also, thankfully and unusually, I did have an ftm trans relative who fit into my queer journey in a very interesting way. I’d always had a favorite uncle growing up, who I was told had changed his name, but that was the extent of what I knew. I idolized him very strongly lol, he was everything my child self wanted to be. It wasn’t until I started to realize I was trans that puzzle pieces acquired throughout my life started to fit into place, and I started to suspect my uncle was trans too. It was weird, I felt like a detective. I felt super alone during this time, and I also felt like being queer and trans were forbidden things that only applied to me. So the possibility that there was this trans man in my family who was loved and embraced by all my loved ones and I had never even knew was shocking and unbelievable. I eventually decided that my suspicions were delusions made up to try and make myself feel better. That was until I came out to my extended family, which only occurred when I had started to socially transition. My uncle took me aside and explained that he was also trans, very gently, and before he could even finish I blurted out “I KNOW!!! I FIGURED IT OUT!!” It was such a joyful and unexpected moment. Even though my uncle wasn’t technically there during the meat and potatoes of my self discovery and acceptance journey, since neither of us knew the other was trans, he always served as an encouragement. A reminder that trans ppl were everywhere living happy adult lives. And when I was transitioning he was a great friend and mentor for me. I’m so lucky to have had someone like him growing up. He continues to be my favorite uncle to this day, and I may or may not still idolize him like a child, lol.

🌾 - How queer do you think you look? Would it be obvious to someone that you were queer if they looked at you?

I alluded to this earlier but I am not visibly queer in the slightest 😭. I haven’t mentioned it yet but in addition to being transgender I’m also bisexual! Which hasn’t been really relevant to this post bcus my journey with that is so minute and uninteresting in comparison, lol. But anyway I’m bisexual! I’m a bisexual man! And I want to be perceived as a queer person, a bisexual man, but Im so used to basing my presentation around passing and blending in and not getting harassed that I don’t really know how to do that without getting some crazy anxiety. It’s so frustrating! I see queer ppl in public and try to telepathically communicate that I’m one of them but they never even glance at me 😭. So no, definitely not, I look straight as a rod, if not slightly nerdy. If you were to interact me, however, you’d likely peg me as a homo if you have keen radar. I have pretty feminine mannerisms, and since I pass really well I usually come off as a gay guy to other queer ppl. Straight ppl, not usually. And you wouldn’t be able to tell by just looking at me, haha.

Once again thank you sm for sending me the ask! Great questions btw, obviously they made me self reflect a ton (I’m so sorry this is so long!). I really appreciate it tho and I hope my answers are interesting to read about

[kittyprincessofcats]

RWBY Volume 8, Episodes 8-12

All caught up with RWBY now! (Except for the premium only episode.)

So, two things first: 1. From now on, my blog will no longer be spoiler free for RWBY! I don’t have premium access, so no spoilers for that, but beyond that, I might now reblog spoilers for everything that’s been released to the public. Blacklist “#RWBY spoilers” if you don’t want to see them.

2. I was going to ask what the spoiler policy in this fandom in general is when it comes to premium access. From what I’ve seen, Youtubers usually wait a week before uploading their reaction videos, which I appreciate – but here on tumblr almost no one seems to hold back. I saw a spoiler for “Creation” before it was released publicly. The day episode 13 was released for premium access, I had to unfollow people for posting untagged spoilers for it. And when I went into a RWBY-related tag for one second, I saw a really big spoiler that put me in a very sour mood because it also happened to be very aggressively worded against fans of a certain character (basically, along the lines of “I’m glad X bad thing happened to Y character because I hate them and their fans”). So, that scared the shit out of me and I ended up looking up more specific spoilers about what exactly happened because I wouldn’t have been able to sleep otherwise. So, from what I’ve seen, this fandom’s spoiler policy is just “fuck anyone who doesn’t have premium access” 😒. Always nice to see people being so considerate.

With that said, let’s get into my thoughts on episodes 8-12. Under the cut, because unlike some people, I try to be considerate of others who might want to avoid spoilers.

- So, the Hound really was a person. Specifically, a person with silver eyes and that’s probably what happened to Summer. THANKS, I HATE IT. This is exactly what I feared it would be and what I didn’t want it to be. (I don’t want Ruby and Yang to have to fight and kill their grimm-ified mom, that’s too sad, okay?)

- I love that Whitley really came through and came up with a plan for evacuating everyone! He’s a good bean after all! And that he managed to press that button on the computer before running from the Hound? Amazing.

- Willow Schnee being one hell of a mama bear and summoning a thing to protect Whitley was epic. She was so close to breaking down before that, but then her child was in danger and she just jumped into action right away. Protective mom instincts ftw!

- Blake’s talk about how she looks up to Ruby and how she herself lost the youthful optimism Ruby still has was SO sweet! (Also, Ladybug is an underrated ship/friendship and I really don’t get why people say they never interact? Have you all just forgotten volume 1 and how Bumbleby’s first meeting happened because Yang was trying to wingman Ruby who was trying to befriend Blake??)

- Penny fighting the virus from the inside was amazing, she did so well! I also loved seeing Nora encourage her (and echo Blake’s earlier words back to her).

- Unrelated to these episodes specifically, but I tried to think about who my favourite RWBY charactes even are right now, and I find it super hard to narrow down because I love so many of them, but if I tried to somewhat narrow it down, then (in no specific order because don’t ask me to also come up with an order): all of Team RWBY (though Blake is a personal favourite), Ilia, Penny, Salem, Cinder. (But then again, I also love Winter and Qrow and Robyn and... you get it, it’s hard to narrow down. Oh, and of course Pyrrha, but... you know.)

- “Witch” was honestly my favourite episode of the bunch. That one was just so full of epic stuff. (And now I’m wondering if Salem being one of my favourite characters has anything to do with my love for witches. I used to be obsessed with witches as a kid. In every story I read that had a witch, the witch was always my favourite character.)

- Yang and her team sure found a way inside that whale fast! Also, really handy that Ren’s semblance evolved just in time for when they needed it. But hey, I don’t want to complain about convenient plot stuff too much. Sometimes the heroes are allowed to have a little bit of good luck.

- Hazel listening to Oscar and deciding to get both him AND Emerald out of there was amazing! He really does have a soft spot for kids and wasn’t kidding about not wanting more kids to die – we love to see it! I also think it makes for an interesting parallel that Hazel decided to do this right as Ironwood was sending students to fight on the front lines and Marrow was calling it out.

- I really liked Ren telling Yang she doesn’t have to hide her fear behind jokes. Ren being able to see emotions is going to bring about so many more good moments, I just know it!

- Emerald and “Hazel’s” talk with Salem gets so much better when you know “Hazel” is actually Oscar – Emerald has gotten so much better at illusions and fooled Salem herself! That’s impressive!

- It’s really practical that Ren could sense Emerald’s fear. But also, the group really didn’t have the time to discuss if Emerald was trustworthy – they needed to get out of there asap.

- The way Salem spits out the word “semblance” when she talks to Emerald shows again that she not only underestimates these “new humans” and their powers, but also considers them inferior. It’s a nice little detail how just her tone when she says that word says so much about her worldview.

- Yang straight-up running up to Salem and blowing her up was epic. It didn’t last of course, but it was still a super bold and epic move. I’ve talked before about how cool Yang is and she just keeps getting cooler.

- Yang calling Salem out was amazing and epic, too! And when she referred to Summer Rose as “my mom” that made me tear up just a bit 😢. (I really don’t like Salem’s smile when she says “her again”, though. I don’t want grimm-ified Summer, I really don’t want it, okay? keep it far away from me where I won’t have to see it.)

- I’m a bit sad about Hazel’s death, but it was a really fitting end for his character and a really cool way to go out. The way he looked at all of those kids in danger (proving again that that’s what it’s about for him), whispered “No more Gretchens” to Oscar, punched Salem in the face as she was about to hurt Emerald, injected all of those crystals into his skin (which looked epic, by the way), told Emerald to go, fought an epic fight against Salem and then grabbed her and set himself and her on fire, burning her like a witch – it was epic stuff! RIP Hazel, you died as a hero and went out in an incredibly epic way!

- Hazel’s sacrifice must have been super tough on Emerald. He died protecting her (and JOYR) and it worked. She got away from Salem, but only because someone else, a friend, died for her. Not only must it be awful for her to lose Hazel, she probably also blames herself. (And, as I’ve seen others point out, it was probably the first time in her life an adult did something to protect her. Wow. Someone get this girl therapy, please.)

- The whale getting blown up was an absolutely epic moment. From the music to the cinematography, I loved everything about it. (That said, I will miss the whale. RIP coolest villain lair ever.)

- I loved Watts’ speech to Cinder – and I’m saying this as someone who became a huge fan of Cinder this volume. I love her, but I also love roasting her, and a lot of what Watts said was stuff she desperately needed to hear. I honestly didn’t even like Watts before that moment, but that speech might have made me like him just a tiny bit. The way he just laughed when she dangled him from a building, the way he spelled it out for her that her methods haven’t been working and threw her failures in her face, the ending with calling her “a bloody migraine” – Like I said, I’m a fan of Cinder, but that was glorious and cathartic and beautiful to witness. But what makes it really perfect is Cinder’s reaction: The fact that you’d expect her to kill him or at least scream at him, but instead she spares him and just sits down and cries. I really love what they’ve been doing with Cinder this volume and that they’re finally showing her as someone way deeper than just a power-hungry villain.

- In general, let me quickly talk about Cinder, because even without having seen the last two episodes I can already tell you that she’s my standout character / favourite character of the season. (It was Ilia for Volume 5, Salem for Volume 6, Penny for Volume 7 – and now it’s Cinder.) I said back in my post about Volume 5 that I wish they’d do more with her because after becoming rather interesting in Volume 4 they just went back to making her a pretty flat villain – and I officially have to eat my words and apologize to RoosterTeeth right now! This volume proved to me that they know what they’re doing with Cinder and explained so much about her. I’m sorry for ever doubting the writing. I now want to go back and rewatch the whole show while paying more attention to Cinder and I can’t wait to see where her arc goes from here (yes, I want an eventual redemption, and what about it?). This volume is obviously setting up something big for her – I just have no idea what it is. And at the end of the day, she’s still the Maiden of Choice. She’s the key to the Beacon relic, and that’s going to become important eventually.

- Oh, and can I mention, just by the way, that I think Cinder looks amazing? I don’t understand all the people who say they miss her red outfits when this is clearly her best look yet. The black eyepatch, the cape, the earrings, the short hair, the high boots, the shorts instead of a dress, all the black – this is her absolute best look, period.

- I’ve also noticed that the scene between her and Watts is the first time Cinder has referred to Penny by name. She’s always referred to her with phrases like “some toy” or “Polendina’s creation” before, but this time she just called her “Penny Polendina”, then “Penny” again, and asked Watts how she’s supposed to take Penny’s power “if she’s dead” (not “destroyed”, which is what Watts said, but “dead” – something you say about a person, not a machine). I think somewhere down the line, Cinder has started to see Penny as a person and respect her as the Winter Maiden. Maybe it’s because of how Penny won the fight at Amity, or maybe (though this might be wishful thinking on my part) it’s because Penny questioned why Cinder serves Salem and showed her and Emerald mercy.

- Also, side-note: While I loved Watts’ speech, it sure is bold of him to call Cinder entitled when his own villain origin story is getting overlooked for a science project.

- Neo is an amazing little troll and I love her. From stealing the lamp and skipping along the ruins of the whale happily to those texts to Cinder, all of her moments were brilliant and hilarious.

- Some characters not just forgiving Emerald is totally fair and realistic. But, as I said before (and as Oscar also points out), they don’t have to. People think a “redemption” – or let’s just call it switching sides instead of using such a loaded term – has to include everyone’s forgiveness, but it doesn’t. If Yang and Jaune never want to personally forgive Emerald, that’s okay. They don’t need to forgive her to recognize that she’s changed and work with her. And, as Oscar and Ren point out, Emerald’s abilities would be very useful to have on their side. So, personal feelings are fine and all, but right now they don’t have the luxury to dismiss a potentially very useful ally. (And same for Oz, by the way. It’s fine if they’re still mad at him, but they also need his help.)

- Also, have I already said that I’m very happy for Emerald? Because I’m very happy for Emerald for getting out of there! (Mercury’s and then Cinder’s redemption next, please!)

- F*ck Harriet for trying to get Winter in trouble for letting JYR go. I’m hating her more every second. And then she seriously said “Who cares?” about Ironwood’s plan to nuke Mantle? She’s the most unlikable of them all.

- Everyone’s reunions were so sweet! I loved Ruby and Yang hugging 😭. And Yang cupping Blake’s cheek and their forehead touch had me all 🥰 🥰 🥰.

- After he threatened to nuke Mantle, I hope we can all agree that Ironwood is a straight-up villain now. The most infuriating part is that he didn’t even have to do anything! Whitley and Weiss had figured out a way to save everyone in Mantle and the SDC ships to evacuate people were already there. All Ironwood had to do was let them evacuate everyone to Atlas, and then Penny would have opened the vault willingly and Ironwood could have used the staff to raise Atlas as planned. Problem solved! He should have just sat there and ate his food – but he was so pissed about things not going his way (or maybe he just genuinely hates Mantle that much) that he thought sabotaging the rescue plan and threatening genocide was a better option.

- I loved Marrow’s arc in these episodes and how you could tell more and more that his conscience was making him turn against Ironwood. First he questioned Winter when she was going to nuke the whale before JOYR were back, then he seemed shocked when he thought they were dead, then he tried to talk sense into the other Ace Ops after Ironwood’s ultimatum, and then he straight-up called out Ironwood himself. That last one was dangerous though, and he was lucky Winter was quick enough to jump in and pretend to arrest him, because Ironwood was going to just shoot him in the back.

- Speaking of, I wonder how long Winter has been planning to double-cross Ironwood. How long was she already disagreeing with him, but waiting for the right moment to make a move? Either way, I’m glad she was there to save Marrow.

- The Renora confession scene was so sweet and got me a little choked up 😢. I’m glad they sorted out their issues and told each other how they feel. But like I said before, I think Nora’s arc of trying to find out who she is without Ren is really good and important and Ren respecting that was really good and important as well. It was just a very wholesome scene. Also, I like that we got a little bit more backstory for Nora (her mom abandoned her? that’s awful), and Jaune awkwardly leaving the room was hilarious.

- Robyn telling Qrow he’s a better Huntsman than Clover because he chose to do the right thing was a really important moment for Qrow, imo. (And just a side-note: I’m sure most Fair Game shippers are pretty chill – and I’m a strong believer in ‘ship and let ship’ – but a certain subset of them is starting to get on my nerves with how they ignore Clover’s canon character and story (acting like he would have rebelled against Ironwood if he were alive as if the whole reason he’s dead wasn’t precisely because he cared more about Ironwood’s orders than doing the right thing) and how they make every new plot point about their ship somehow (Oscar’s semblance? Better be a time-travel thing so Clover can come back. Staff of Creation? Better be able to bring people back from the dead so Clover can come back.) It’s so annoying.)

- Yang and Ruby’s talk about their mom was really intense. Ruby’s been holding all of these feelings in for so long, so seeing her say out loud what we’re all fearing (that Summer was turned into a Grimm) and seeing both her and Yang break down over it – that was a lot. I loved seeing Yang comfort Ruby and tell her that her plan for Amity wasn’t useless. Their sisterly bond is so sweet.

- Penny asking Ruby to kill her was another really intense moment. The look on Ruby’s face in that moment really said it all. Ruby has been through so much, has lost Penny before, so hearing that request – even though they fortunately didn’t have to go through with it – must have still been a lot for her.

- I really loved Emerald’s cute “newly reformed villain” moments. (“You guys have been getting your asses kicked… some of that my fault” & “I’m just going to be super pissed if you all finally decide to give up the moment I switch sides.”) I’ve said before (in my She-Ra posts) that my favourite part of any redemption arc is the “former enemies, now awkward around each other” stuff, so this was right up my alley!

- “The girl who fell through the world” was referenced twice now. Between that, the image of everyone falling in the opening, and the lyrics “sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall”, I’m going to predict that someone – most likely all of Team RWBY – will fall into that void and potentially end up in a different world.

- The group’s plan to defeat Ironwood, stop the bomb, and get to the vault was amazing all-around. I love the parts Emerald and Winter got to play in it, I love how we saw the plan’s execution before seeing how they came up with it and I love how everyone got to help, even the Schnees and Klein. I also love that the hole Oscar blasted through the ground of Atlas became relevant again.

- The design of the vault and the door are really nice and now I wonder what the other two are going to look like.

- Saving Penny like that was super risky, but they really were out of options. Just the fact that Ruby had to be quick enough to use her semblance and get to the staff before the virus kills Penny… jeesh, that was close.

- Ambrosius is a super fun character! I love that he looked at Penny and said “I’d love to meet whoever did this.” Also, the staff seems more useful than the lamp. The lamp only lets you ask three questions per century, while the staff can be used as often as you want – as long as you’re okay with whatever it previously created disappearing.

- I honestly still don’t completely understand what Penny is now. Is she meant to be human now? Or is she just a being made up of pure aura? How does this work? Ambrosius only created the copy that destroyed herself, so what’s left is Penny’s aura – but she somehow also has a body now? I guess we’ll find out more about what exactly this means later.

- Also, while I wasn’t sure how I feel about this decision re:Penny at first, now that I’ve thought about it for a bit, I think it works. It fits with the Pinocchio story, and I like that they didn’t phrase it as “she’s a real girl now”, but as “this is the girl who’s been in there all along”. Also, Penny saying “wow” after hugging Ruby and then going on a hugging spree was adorable.

- Watching “herself” self-terminate must have been really traumatic, though. Even if that copy was just a robot, it was still a disturbing scene.

- Who shut down communications in the middle of Jaune’s broadcast? I’m assuming it was Cinder, Watts and Neo.

- The whole dimension with the doorways that Ambrosius created looks amazing. (A while before watching this episode, I wondered if Raven could theoretically save Atlas by getting everyone to safety with her portals. It might not have been Raven, but I’m glad I was at least onto something.)

- “Do not fall.” So, about that… they’re all falling in the opening, (and we referenced “the girl who fell through the world” twice now), so I don’t have a good feeling about that. Also, Watts has been dangled from somewhere high twice now, so the third time has to be when he actually falls down.

- And Cinder is there to ruin the plan because of course she is.

[marshmallow-phd]

Midnight Hours

Part of The Untamed - EXO Wolf Universe

Genre: Wolf!AU

Pairing: Sehun x Reader

Summary: For you, being a good witch was easier said than done. Something dark was lurking inside of you and the others knew it. When you’re forced to tag along with Soomi and help a local wolfpack face a coming evil, you’re sent on a path that breaks into a crossroads. While you struggle with your inner demons, could the wolf Sehun be the key to your ultimate fate?

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11 I 12 I 13 I 14 I 15 I 16 I 17 I Final

**

Things had calmed down significantly over the course of the next couple of weeks. You found yourself settling in nicely in your spot next to Sehun. No longer did the two of you sit on opposite sides of the room, trying everything in your power to avoid eye contact. Now you sat side by side, his hand on your thigh or your head against his shoulder. You never thought that you could be this happy with another person. Long ago, you’d resigned yourself to always being the outcast, the one left on the sidelines. But that was never your place. And the pack was almost over compensating in making you feel welcome and a part of them after how they’d reacted to the fire incident. 

“(y/n), show Mei the trick you did yesterday!” Chanyeol exclaimed as he flopped down on the floor next to you. The one-year-old was standing at the coffee table, wearing a too-big t-shirt that you were sure was Kris’ at some point, painting on copy paper with child-proof water colors. Evie was on the couch, only partially reading the book in her hand as she kept one eye on Mei in case of any accidents. 

“I don’t think I’m supposed to,” you muttered. Kris was still cautious of you around Mei. He’d let up a bit after learning that you’d easily accepted Sehun as your wolf, but overprotective seemed like an understatement when it came to his daughter. 

“It’s just water,” Jongin encouraged, even flashing you that blinding smile. You’d never tell Sehun, but you were certain that Jongin’s was the most dazzling in the pack. “She’ll enjoy it.”

Too many eyes were on you, waiting eagerly like you were the party’s magician about to make the rabbit reappear. It was a new kind of feeling. Most of them had let go of the fact that you accidentally set the floor on fire once in your sleep. They’d moved on to fascination, constantly asking you to show them something else. Soomi’s disapproving stares could be felt from wherever she stood, but you obliged, for two reasons, mostly. The first was that it made you feel accepted amongst the wolves – a chunk of them anyway. Jongdae kept his distance, then there was Kris, of course. Minseok and Yixing didn’t seem as interested in you or your powers, staying off to the side and rarely joining in on the commotion. Which was fine; you didn’t let it bother you�� too much. 

The second reason was why you really gave into their requests. This was the most practice of your powers you’d ever had in your life. Virtual free reign to concentrate and manipulate at least two of the elements to the point where it was almost effortless. Earth still gave you trouble and you refused to play with fire – literally. You were afraid of losing control again. And, even if you refused to admit it to anyone, the last vision still terrified you. 

Nothing else had come to you since that night and you wondered if that was a sign. You worried over it, to the point that Sehun noticed and tried to sooth you through it, saying that maybe it was a good thing and that the course of time was changing. But you didn’t believe it. You couldn’t. The blood moon was inching closer and along with it, the threat that remained in the shadows. 

Taking a deep breath, you focused on the present, smiling at the young girl as you scooted on your knees closer to the coffee table. You said nothing to Mei, simply lifting your hand and concentrating on the liquid in the plastic cup. 

At first, she didn’t notice the swirling, murky orb of paint-tainted water lifting from the cup, too focused in on her masterpiece to care.

“Mei,” Jongin whispered next to her ear. He pointed to the orb in an effort to grab her attention. A few seconds went by before she finally looked up. Then she gasped. 

You couldn’t help but smile at the wonder in her eyes. She followed the ball as you moved it across the room, stumbling and tripping over the dress-like shirt that kept her clean. With a tiny hand, she reached out. You concentrated on keeping the form together as she poked at the surface. A loud squealing giggle erupted from Mei as soon as her tiny finger met the water. She leapt back and clapped her hands. A broad smile of your own spread wide across your lips at her excitement. Several droplets fell from the orb down to the rug as your focus slipped, but you were able to save the rest when you realized what you were about to do. 

“Mo’! Mo’!” Mei cheered after you put the water back in the cup. 

“Actually, I think it’s time for lunch,” Evie said as she put down the book and stood from the couch. 

Apparently not a fan of this new suggestion, Mei stumbled her way over to you, falling into your lap and burying her face in your stomach. 

“Nice try,” Evie said in her practiced mom voice. She walked over, bent down, and plucked her right up. Mei squirmed and pouted in her mother’s arms. The child certainly didn’t want to leave, even sending you a pleading look to save her. But there was nothing you could do. Mother trumped witch every time. 

“You’re going to be her new best friend,” Chanyeol laughed once they were in the kitchen. 

“Until she finds something else more exciting,” you said with a chuckle. Your eyes moved across the room, secretly hoping that Sehun had returned from town. He’d gone with Kris to the auto shop, needing to pick up a few parts for his car. Knowing you’d be bored to death and being very against the idea of sitting in a confined space with Kris for almost an hour both ways, you’d decided to stay behind. You didn’t need to be by Sehun’s side twenty-four-seven, but he certainly did make you feel more comfortable. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like he was back quite yet. 

Your eyes, however, did land on Harper, who stood near the entrance to the front parlor, arms folded over her chest and her eyes planted on the floor near her feet. A sad smile pulled on her lips as she was lost in thought, making you wonder what was going on her head. Before you could come to any conclusion of your own, her smile disappeared, her expression twisting to one of pain before she turned and ran out of the room. Concerned for your friend, you jumped to your feet and followed her. 

Harper had ran outside and made it to just beyond the edge of the trees before you saw her bend over. The sounds that reached your ears told you that she was throwing up. You approached cautiously. “Harper?”

She froze. She didn’t shift to look at you. Her gaze stayed down on the dirt, hands resting on her knees to keep her stable. 

“You know, most people run to the bathroom when they’re going to be sick,” you joked. That actually got a laugh out of her. 

Straightening up, Harper wiped the corner of her mouth with her sleeve. “There’s less ears out here.”

“Less ears?” you echoed. Luhan was gone on a run with the older wolves and you didn’t think anyone else – except for a few of the mates – would be all over her if she simply got sick. While Harper was always the more “suffer in silence” type that you could identify with, this seemed a little out there even for her. “What’s going on?”

A burdened sigh blew through her lips. She pushed a lock of her short hair behind her ear. Almost subconsciously, a hand drifted down to her stomach. 

Oh. Oh. 

 You chewed on your bottom lip. “How long?”

Harper shrugged. “A few weeks at most. I took the test at Hae In’s a few days ago when I started to suspect, although she doesn’t know. She was at work when I did it.”

“Does Luhan know?” Harper shook her head. Well, this was quite the predicament you found yourself in. If you were to list out all the couples in the house and put them in order of who was most likely to get pregnant next, these two would have been near the bottom of the list. “Are you going to tell him?”

Again, she shook her head. “Not until after the blood moon and all this other chaos has settled down. I don’t need him worrying about me when his head needs to be focused on the pack. Once that threat is handled, I’ll tell him.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Do you think you’ll be able to hide this from him for long?”

“I have my ways,” she said. “Besides, he’s not as observant as he likes to think he is.”

“None of them are,” you agreed with a laugh. 

Harper laughed along with you until it slowly faded out. “Look, (y/n)-”

“Your secret’s safe with me,” you promised. “Even from Sehun. When it’s not mine to tell, it never leaves my lips.” As someone who lived with a constant secret as well, you knew the importance of trust. And you knew you couldn’t tell Sehun. Whether you swore him to secrecy or not, eventually he’d let it slip to Luhan. That was neither his place, nor yours. 

“Thank you,” Harper sniffed. For the first time since you’d met her, you saw a vulnerability in her eyes. A glassy sheen took over them and she sniffed again. “Is it bad if I admit I’m a little scared?”

You stepped closer to her, taking her hand in yours. “Why would that be bad?”

“I’m not like Evie,” she admitted in a quivering voice. “I’m not- I just don’t know if… if I’m capable of something like that. I’m not… I’m not soft. I was raised to hunt.”

“And to protect, if I remember correctly,” you pointed out. Giving out a sigh of your own, you tried another approach. “There’s all different kinds of mothers,” you said. “Not all are good, but most are. And even the good ones differ. You don’t have to be just like Evie. You can be your own kind of mother. I’m sure no matter what, that that kid is going to be one hell of a strong person.”

Finally, a tiny smile. “You think so?”

You nodded. “I’m certain of it. Besides, who wouldn’t want to have a mom who can teach them to fight? And use a bow? That sounds like some great bonding time to me.”

That really made her beam. Pulling you into a tight hug, she whispered, “Thank you.”

“I know you’re not going to magically feel better, but I’m here whenever you need a cheerleader, okay?” You leaned back, adding, “But you really should tell Luhan.”

“I will,” Harper scoffed as she let you go. “I’m going to regret you knowing, aren’t I?”

“Of course not,” you argued. You shrugged, taunting, “Someone’s going to need to be on your side when the rest find out.” Harper’s expression scrunched. She knew you were telling the truth. “Especially once Hae In finds out that you kept it from her.”

“Okay, okay.” She flung an arm around your shoulders. “Lets keep it down. And we should probably head back inside before someone actually notices.”

You nodded in agreement and then turned to head back inside. Then you flinched. Sehun was standing on the porch, arms folded and a curious frown pinching his brow together. 

“About time you came back,” you teased in an effort to distract him. A smirk was his only response. Harper patted you on the back, giving you the go ahead. But you didn’t take off and run to your wolf. Instead, you kept pace with Harper, staying by her side as you walked towards the porch. The confidence in Sehun’s expression wayned. 

“Hey.” Sehun caught your arm before you could head inside. “Is everything okay?”

Your eyes flickered to Harper, who gave you a smile before stepping through the front door. Plastering on your own smile, you replied, “Yeah, of course. Just some girl time. No big deal.”

Sehun visibly grinded down on his teeth. “You would tell me if something was wrong, right?”

“Yeah, if something was wrong with me, I’d tell you.” It wasn’t a lie - mostly. If something concerning you was going on, you’d tell him. He was always easy to talk to, more so than anyone you’d ever met before. But nothing was wrong with you, outside of your normal worries. Outside of the one thing you couldn’t voice even to the wind or the trees. Outside of the thing that scared you most. 

Feeling that lump rising up in your throat that always did when you thought about it, you pushed yourself into Sehun’s embrace. His heart was right against your ear, beating fast from your closeness. He let go of your arm and wrapped his arms around you. 

“I missed you,” he said softly. 

You scoffed. “You were only gone a few hours. How could you miss me?”

“I guess I’m just a sap.”

Rolling your eyes, you leaned back to retort. But you played right into his hands. 

Before you could let out a single word, he pressed his lips to yours, lifting you up and placing you on the porch railing. 

“You are ridiculous,” you murmured against his lips. 

“I know,” he murmured back. “But you love me for it.”

You stilled. That word….

With his thumb, he caressed your cheek. “Are you sure everything’s okay?”

“Of course,” you urged, trying to stay peppy for him. But that stupid word kept bouncing around your head. Sliding down from the railing, you took his hand. “Come on. I’m hungry.”

“But (y/n)-”

“I can hear your stomach growling. Let’s go wolf boy.”

He wanted to argue, but he snapped his mouth shut. Thankfully, he’d save that argument for another day.

[rhetoricalrogue]

31 Days of Wayhaven, Day 13

Prompt: Apology Rating: PG for Nicky and Tony’s foul mouths. Like grandfather, like grandson. Words: 1,482 Characters: Nicolo Morelli, Anthony Morelli Summary: Meeting his grandson did not go quite as Nicky planned.

For the @31daysofwayhaven event.

It had taken Nicky some time to gather enough courage to ask Farah to get back in contact with Detective Miller so she wouldn’t be surprised when he dropped by the police station, literal hat in hand, to explain his circumstances.  The detective - Aubrey, please just call me Aubrey - was surprisingly easygoing when it came to speaking with him.  She’d met him at a little bakery cafe for coffee and an exceptionally good apple crostata during a lull in the business day.  He’d been a little surprised that she had come alone, the way that the rumor mill around the Facility ran, he would have thought any one of the members of Unit Bravo would have accompanied her.  He’d almost hoped that they would have, seeing that it would add a little bit more weight to his story.

Aubrey had been quiet as he explained his past and how a chance meeting with Farah had clued him into the fact that he may have possibly fathered a child and the woman who had cursed him was an immortal witch.  She’d listened, quietly eating her dessert while sipping on coffee, before nodding.

“I’m doing this because I love Tony,” she said slowly.  “He’s the brother that I never had and my dearest of friends.  I also know his mom and I’ve been in contact with his grandmother.”  She thumbed through her phone before sliding it over to show a picture she had taken with an older woman and Nicky’s breath caught in his throat.  There was a faint shimmer around her that to the human eye would have been mistaken for reflection of light hitting her just so, though someone trained in spotting supernatural talents, such as he was, could tell that she was using a glamour to make herself look older.  Yet magic or no, there was no mistaking Isabela.  Over three hundred years apart and he could still have easily picked her out of a crowd if someone told him she was ten feet away from him.

“Thank you.”

She nodded before taking her phone back and chewing on her lip as she composed a lengthy text to her best friend before giving up and just dialing him directly.  “But if you even think about hurting him or his family, I swear I’ll kill you, curse or no curse.”

In the end, Aubrey wound up telling Tony that she had met a distant relative of his and wanted to see if he would be interested in meeting him.  Nicky guessed it had been a good idea, seeing that according to Farah, Aubrey still didn’t know that her dearest friend in the world was half-fey himself and it would be easier to explain face to face since both men were well aware of the supernatural.  

The meeting between himself and Tony had gone...differently than he expected.  He hadn’t been expecting much either, but for a man a little older than his age - and how hilarious was it that he was younger than his own grandson! - to walk up to him and say “So, you’re the one who knocked up my nonna and then hightailed it out of town.  What the fuck, man?” was definitely not on the list.

“Hey!”

“What? You don’t get to be indignant, stronzo.  You’re supposed to be dead.”

Nick glared at the finger Tony was pressing against his chest.  “I fucking am, you little punk.  Your grandmother -”

Tony let out a snarl that would have done Penny proud. “My grandmother spent centuries mourning your loss, you prick!”

He narrowed his eyes.  “Why would she do that? She flat out cursed me to never die.”

“Nonna Isabela would never do such a thing!”

“May you never know the peace of the grave doesn’t quite sound like she was giving me a damn blessing!”

“She doesn’t deal in -” He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb.  “Fuck. You want to know where she is, don’t you?”

“I do.”

“And even if I refuse to tell you, you have Agency resources to help you find her?”

He stood up straighter.  “I do.” Okay, so that was a lie, there were rules in place to not misuse Agency property for personal gain, but what his grandson didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

Tony stubbornly lifted his chin and oh. It was like looking in a mirror.  “And what about my mother, huh?  You going to ask about her, or were you just going to walk away again like you did nearly four hundred years ago?  She grew up without a father, you know.  Her mother never married, just told everyone who asked that her husband had died and she’d never love another.”

“I didn’t know about -” 

The anger was back, and there was something not quite human that flashed in Tony’s eyes.  “Doesn’t matter, you would have still left.  You look the type that fucks and runs.”  He threw his hands up and turned away, but then pivoted and pointed his finger at Nicky again.  “She loves you, you know.  When I was a kid, I would ask her about you, but then I stopped because she always got so sad.  She goes to Sicily every year to tend to graveyards because she’s hoping that maybe, maybe one year she’ll find your plot and she could get some closure.”  He narrowed his eyes.  “She called you her true love, someone she would have gladly bound herself to for all eternity.  She even took your last name and gave it to my mother.”

Nicky ran his hands through his hair.  “We only knew the other for a week!”

“Soulmates, jackass!  They exist, you know!”

It was Nicky’s turn to jab a finger into Tony’s chest. “And for your information, I wouldn’t have left, had I known about your mother.” He jabbed again.  “You don’t know a damned thing about me.”

“And whose fault is that?”

“I was excommunicated, for Christ’s sake!  My own sister thought I was a demon and disowned me when I showed up at her doorstep, still bloody from where some asshole had knifed me and left me to rot in a ditch!  I spent years looking for Isabela and nothing!”  He narrowed his eyes.  “Don’t you tell me that she was the only one living through pain.  Do you have any idea what it’s like to know that you’re dead, but never getting the chance to die?  I have tried poisons, explosives, knives, guns, everything and all that happens is that for the briefest window of time, I black out and experience the smallest amount of peace before I’m back, my body whole as if nothing had ever happened to it.”

Tony looked at him and while the anger was still there, it was as if someone had taken a boiling over pot off the stove to let it sit for a moment.  “So, what do you want?  For her to break her curse and let you rest?”

“Had you asked me that a decade or so ago, I would have answered yes.  I wanted to die for good for a very long time.”

“What changed?”

“Finding something to live for.”  He sighed. “Look, tell me where Isabela is or keep it to yourself, I don’t care.  Just...tell her and your mother that I’m sorry.  For everything.”  Nicky gave a faint smile.  “Gianna was my grandmother’s name.  She raised me and my sister when our parents died; she would have been happy to know that her name outlived her.”  With that, Nicky turned and walked away, belatedly realizing that two men shouting at the other in rapid Italian in a public area had gathered a bit of attention.

“She’s not here,” Tony called out.  “My mother.”

Nicky turned around.  “And if she were?”  He tried to keep the hope in his voice carefully hidden, but he knew that Tony had heard it anyway.

“She’s…” Tony also seemed to be aware of the few eyes that had drifted their way. “At home, with my dad.  She’ll be back in a week though, which may give her enough time to wrap her head around her father wanting to make contact.”

He swallowed and nodded.  “Thank you.”

Tony snorted.  “Don’t thank me yet, old man. I don’t know how she’s going to react, or even if she’ll want to see you.”

“Still, thank you.”

“What makes you think that my grandmother would want to speak with you after so long?”

Nicky tensed, but then decided to hide his nerves behind his usual charm.  “Because, nipote, how could she not?  Like you said, I am the love of her life.”

Tony groaned.  “Okay, now I want to see how this plays out. There’s no way that Nonna Isabela actually fell for that line.”

“Only time will tell if she falls for it a second time.”

[lynelovespopculture]

THE CHILLING ADVENTURES OF ZELDA-CHAPTER 18-THE BREAKING POINT AS THE MORTALS AROUND THEM GROW MORE OBSESSED WITH WITCHES, THE SPELLMANS START TO FEEL THE PRESSURE.

After the announcement of the play, the rest of the day was pretty much shot. After school, Faustus had more work to do so Cordelia took the bus home.  She sighed as she opened and closed the front door. “I said no.” Zelda’s voice came from the kitchen. “Mom, you are never going to believe this,” Cordelia muttered as she dropped her backpack onto a chair, entered the kitchen, and froze. For Zelda was not alone. “Look, Lilith,” Zelda said through gritted teeth. “You came here to ask me a question and I have answered you. I said no and it’s staying no!” “But I need you!” Lilith insisted. “We both know that you’re the best of the best. Besides, as the queen of hell, I can simply command you.” “Oh no, you can’t!” Zelda held her ground. “In fact, as I recall the last time I asked for your help, you told me that since I was not a part of hell’s court and was no longer a member of the church of night or the church of Lilith, that I was an outsider and you were under no obligation to help me.” Lilith knew she was losing her case but she continued pleading regardless. “It won’t be like last time. I promise! Lucifer is still inside that council member, still very much locked up. The minion and I check on him often. I swear it won’t be like last time.” “I know it won’t,” Zelda agreed “because this time I’m not getting myself or my family involved.” Meanwhile, Cordelia stood silently in the corner, confused over this exchange. Lucifer? Queen of hell? What the heaven did this all mean?  Cordelia was pretty sure she knew the woman who was fighting with her mother but didn’t know from where. “Please Zelda,” Lilith continued.  “Adam was just so sweet when I told him 3 weeks ago.  He insisted we return to the surface and get married at the courthouse that very day. Nothing like when Zander was born.” That was it! Cordelia suddenly remembered that this Lilith was the happy bride she saw when she and Faustus were driving past city hall on that 1st day of school. “Cordelia!” Lilith purred, bring the child back to the here and now by sliding a hand under her chin and studying her.  “What a lovely young lady you’ve become.” “Thank you,” Cordelia said, unsure.  “Um, have we met?” “Only briefly, a long time ago. But I hope we’ll get to know each other better in the future. Since you and my son are- “ “Lilith! If you say 1 more word, you’ll be returning to hell in a body cast!” Zelda threatened. Cordelia looked on as Lilith coolly shrugged and then walked out the front door before she turned back to her mother. “Who was that, Mom?” “No one you need to concern yourself with. Now, please go fetch your brother and Ambrose. Supper is almost ready.” Cordelia knew her mother’s tone and knew even she asked again, she wouldn’t get any real answers so she turned on her heel and went to get the boys.

Faustus didn’t remember the last time he was this tired. After closing the door, he rested against it for a moment, before tossing his car keys onto a nearby side table.  The house was quiet and dark, which was no surprise considering how late it was. Faustus yawned deeply as he made his way upstairs. On the second floor, the only light led him to his room, where Zelda was sitting up in bed, paperwork all around her. He came forward and kissed Zelda’s welcoming smile. “Hello, my beautiful reason for existing.” Zelda’s smile only grew bigger as she kissed her husband back. “I was expecting you late tonight once Cordy told me about the play.” “Ah, so you’re all caught up?” “Unfortunately, yes.” Faustus gave a little nod, then took off his blazer and unbuttoned his shirt, as he crossed to the room to the chest of drawers that held his night clothes.   “I’m sorry I didn’t call, my love, but it’s hard to make a phone call in the middle of an argument.” “And who were you arguing with?” “Principal Hopper,” Faustus sighed. “I spent 4 and a half hours trying to convince him to put on a different play, any other play! I tried any excuse I could come up with. All in vain, the play will go on as planned. The only good news is that they can’t force Cordy to perform in the play, but since this is a grade 7-8 production, she’ll have to  work backstage somehow.” Faustus explained to his wife on his way to the bathroom. “I had an interesting day too,” Zelda called out as she collected her paperwork off the bed. “Oh?” “You will never believe who came to see me today-Lilith.” Zelda couldn’t help but smile as her shocked husband appeared in the doorway.  His mouth foaming with toothpaste, the brush just dangling.   After he went back and rinsed, Faustus returned to the bedroom. “Lilith, eh?  Haven’t heard that name in this house in a couple of years.” “I had hoped to keep it that way,” Zelda muttered. “So, how is the queen of hell?” “Newly pregnant by her mortal husband, Adam. She asked me to serve as her mid-wife.” Faustus lifted an eyebrow. “What? Again? After what she put this family through last time, I’m surprised she even had the nerve to ask.” “Thank you!” Zelda exclaimed.  “That’s exactly what I said! But she wouldn’t take no for an answer and even after I refused her, she followed me home from the academy and I couldn’t make her leave until after Cordelia came home from school. She even hinted at the odd marriage pact again.” “Don’t worry, dearest. Even if Lilith did keep that damn contract, with no signature, it’s not valid.” Zelda smiled. “It seems you have given this matter some thought.” Faustus shut off his bedside lamp and got into bed. “I’ll admit that I might have brought the case up to Daniel Webster once or twice. Besides, if Lilith is hurting for female company, I know a nosy, moral bitch she can have right now.” Zelda chuckled as she made herself comfortable in Faustus’s arms. “I assume we are now speaking of Nina Robinson.  Is she still giving you trouble?” “Nothing but!” Faustus then told Zelda all about Nina’s absurd behavior from that morning. “I just can’t get rid of this woman! I can’t get any work done either. I finally had to pretend that I was going home, drove around the block, and finally had to hide in a broom closet just to get my work done. It’s pathetic! Oh, and all this was after she undermined me at every turn during that meeting with Hopper.” It was then that Zelda realized something. “Why go to Principal Hopper at all? Why not talk to Theo? He would be more understanding.” Faustus nodded. “That was my 1st idea too but he took off early for a long weekend with Robin. I’ll ask him on Monday,   beloved, and see if he can deal  with Hopper.” Soon after, Zelda fell asleep in Faustus’s arms, her head on his shoulder. Faustus himself was half asleep when he realized something. He and Zelda were still passionate lovers. Making love more times a week than not. But tonight, the topic was not even bought up and that was okay.  Faustus had sensed that Zelda was tired. Did she sense he was too? It was like they could communicate without words. After 13 years of marriage, he had obtained something with Zelda that Faustus never had with any other woman; true intimacy. He vowed that no one would ever take that away.

Turns out Faustus didn’t get the chance to talk to Theo about the play or anything else. Early on Monday morning, even before the 1st-morning bell, Theo slipped and fell on the floor. Bruising his neck and breaking his leg in 3 places. Theo had to take leave.

Cordelia sighed and sat back. “Dad, you’re killing me!” It was Monday evening and Cordelia sat at the kitchen table with her homework while Faustus stood a few feet away, finishing washing the dinner dishes.  Zelda had just left to do a bed check at the academy. “What’s wrong, honey?” Faustus asked. “You know what’s wrong.” His daughter frowned. “I’m the first 1 up tomorrow to read my family tree essay in front of the whole class. What were you thinking when you handed out this assignment.” “I was thinking that we all have families and all the class could share in it. So, what’s wrong? Isn’t your essay finished?” “Oh, it’s finished, all right,” said Cordelia. “And come tomorrow morning everyone in grades 7 and 8 will know that I’m descended from nothing but witches and warlocks. There’s not a mortal in the bunch, well, except for Sabrina, of course. So I figure if I read my essay at 10:15, they should be burning me at the stake on the school’s front lawn by 10:30.” Faustus rolled his eyes and wiped his hands on a towel. “Don’t be overdramatic, Cordy.  Bring your essay over here please.” Cordelia got up from the table and, with the pile of papers, went over to her father. Once Faustus had the papers in his hands, he spoke in Latin and for a moment, the essay glowed bright orange before he gave it back. “There.” “What did you do?” “I fixed it.  Now, the word witch is replaced with the word countess and a warlock is now an earl. It should read just as well.” Cordelia raised an eyebrow.  “You spelled my homework?! You’ve never done that before.” “Don’t get any ideas, Cordy. It’s only a 1-time thing. To keep us all safe.” Faustus took another look around the room to see if anything else needed to be cleaned. He saw a book on the table.  Faustus didn’t even need to move to know that it was the novel called ‘the witch’. The book Nina had assigned for English.  He gestured with his head. “How is that?” “Very odd,” Cordelia answered. “And it’s certainly fiction.” “What makes you say that?”   Cordelia walked back to the table and picked up the book, flipping through the pages. “This is a direct quote, ‘A witch is always a woman…There  is no such thing as a  male witch.’” Cordelia put down the book, frowned. “Now we both know that’s not true.” “The author is a man, right?” Faustus shrugged. “Sound like someone is trying to shift blame.” Cordelia had not thought of that, but the thought did make her smile. Faustus was right. Cordelia’s essay went over well the next day.   She actually felt good about it and managed to hold on to the positive feelings until the mid-morning break. The class was just letting out when a secretary posted something on a nearby bulletin board. It was a signup sheet for play auditions, starting that very afternoon. The triplets and Sara were the first to sign up, then they handed the pen to Cordelia. Cordelia took a step back. “No, thanks.” Erin frowned. “What’s wrong, Cord?” “Nothing, I would just prefer to work backstage.” Erica lifted an eyebrow.  “Since when are you shy?” “See? I told you guys that she  would see herself to be too good for our play.” Sara cut in. “I didn’t say that!” Cordelia snapped. It was Emily who tried to keep the peace.  “But the 5 of us always do everything together.” No, Cordelia thought angrily. The 4 of us always used to do everything together. Sara just showed up a month ago. As Cordelia dealt with her friends, Faustus stood in the classroom doorway when a smiling Nina walked up to him. “I’m glad we’re co-directing this play. It will give us more time together.” Faustus held her skin as she tried to hold his hand. Wordlessly, he just sighed and walked away. Great. More time with Nina Robinson, exactly what he didn’t want.

The rest of the school week was filled with play rehearsals and family tree presentations. Being from the same family, the triplets were allowed to present their essay together. On Friday, it was time for Sara to read her essay. Cordelia didn’t care to pay attention so she picked up a pencil and did some math. So she was only half-listening when Sara said, “Turns out I’m descended from a judge from the Salem witch trials.” Cordelia dropped her pencil and buried her face into her palm. Of course, Sara’s family was from Salem. Of course, they freakin’ were! 20 minutes later, the class clapped as Sara finished her report. “Sickening,” Cordelia muttered. “Do you have a problem with my report, Cordelia?” “Yes, I believe  I do. I understand that you can’t choose your family or where you come from but you spoke so proudly of your relatives from Salem.” Sara shrugged. “Maybe I am.” Cordelia got up and went up to Sara. “You’re proud to be related to a man whose job it was to murder people?!” “It was his job. His civil duty.” “It’s still murder!” Cordelia insisted. “Calm down, will you?” Sara asked. “It’s not like witches are real people.” “Miss Spellman,” Nina finally stepped in. “Please return to your seat.  Sara was nice enough to listen to your report.” Cordelia’s hand curled up in a fist, but only Faustus saw it and covered it with his own as he whispered into his daughter’s ear.  “You have every reason to be upset. But she finished now, the worst is over.

Yet, it wasn’t. The following Tuesday afternoon, during English class, everyone was asked to hand in their novel, Witches, and their notes about it. Cordelia, for one, was glad to be rid of it. But then, Nina rolled in a TV and DVD player. “Now I know that they just did a remake of this movie but the 1991 version will work just as well.” Faustus allowed his 7th graders to watch the movie as well. It was a little silly yet seemingly harmless. Until the so-called ‘witches’ met in a hotel ballroom, locked the doors, and took off their faces-which were all rubber masks. Now all the normal-looking women looked like wrinkled old crones. Except the 1 they called the grand high witch. To call her a wrinkled old crone would be an insult to old crones! 1 moment, she was a lovely woman, the next, a monster. She had little white hairs growing out of every part of her body except on her head. Her spotty skin could have seen on her back which was as uneven as her very long nose. Her ears were large and bat-like and her eyes were not of this world. It happened so fast and cause such shock that it caused Faustus’s mouth to fall open. As soon as the shock wore off, Faustus looked for Cordelia. “Oh no.” He saw that look in his daughter’s eyes before and he doubted that a mere TV and a DVD player set stood a chance against the divine child. Only the kids in the front room saw the glass on the screen crack but everyone saw when the golden sparks flew from the television. Then the TV went black. A moan from the hallway instantly told Faustus that the power had gone out all over school. A boy looked out the window and remarked, “Hey, looks like there’s a blackout all over town!” Meanwhile, without asking permission or bothering with a hall pass, Cordelia got up and left. Faustus rushed after her. “Cordelia!” Faustus entered the hallway just in time to see his daughter duck into the girls’ room. He went in with caution but when he was sure no one else was there, he locked the door. In the last stall, Faustus noticed that there was fresh vomit in the toilet and a white foot coming out of the wall.  Faustus gently nudged the foot with his own and the shoe color returned and the rest of his daughter emerged from the wall. Faustus tried to keep things light. “You have to work on your hiding spells.” However, Cordelia would have none of it. Her face was bright red, and there were plump, hot tears fresh on her cheeks. “Is that how they see us?” She asked. “That we all are evil, gruesome creatures who are out to murder foul-smelling mortal children?” “Oh, honey.” Faustus grabbed a bunch of toilet paper before he sat down and drew Cordelia into his lap, just like he did when she was little. “Darling, you know that’s not true. That was a stupid movie based on a book by a writer, who as you told me yourself doesn’t believe in male witches.” “No.” She insisted as Faustus wiped her tears. “A book can be 1 person’s opinion but it takes a whole lot of people to make a movie.” “You’re right, but that movie has nothing, I repeat, nothing to do with us. And I can prove it.” Cordelia put her head on Faustus’s shoulder. “You can?” He nodded. “The main character is called the Grand High Witch.  You and I both know that there is no such title. The highest title in a coven is a high priest or a high priestess. Speaking of your mother, she is 100% witch but she is also a great beauty as well as a professional midwife and teacher. 2 jobs directly related to children, who she would never hurt.” “But why do mortals do this? Why are witches always the bad guy?” “Hmm, good question.” Said Faustus. “I think it’s a paradox. Mortals love to be scared, yet mortals fear the unknown. So they put all their fears in these characters and called them witches. The mortals who don’t believe think there isn’t anyone to offend and even those who do believe, don’t realize that we have our own faith, our own laws, and society, our own world and therefore, have no need or desire to steal theirs.” “You’re really smart, you know that Dad?” “Thank you.” Faustus looked at his watch. “We should be getting back.” “No, I can’t. I can’t go back in there.” “There’s a blackout. I’m pretty sure that means no more movie for today.” “But they’ll still be talking about it.” Cordelia pointed out. “I’m telling you Dad, I have reached my limit for now.” Faustus sighed. “Okay, since there are only 20 minutes of school left for today, go lay down in the nurses’ station, and then we’ll go home.” Cordelia’s half-smile made them both feel a little bit better.

The pre-teen witch wasn’t the only 1 having a bad week. The triplets were understandingly upset when their father moved out of the family home earlier in the week. To cheer her girls and herself up, Mrs. Warner bought tickets to a magic show and because the show was on the day before the girls’ monthly sleepover, she got 2 extra tickets for Cordelia and Sara. They were even invited to sleepovers on Friday night as well as on Saturday. The magic show took place in a nearby town, so they showed up early and decided to browse the local shops. It was there that Cordelia got the feeling that she was being followed and she was right. The boy followed Cordelia as she and her friends went from shop to shop. However, he lost sign of Cordelia when the others approached the theater and he hid in an alleyway. “Why are you following me?” The boy turned to an annoyed Cordelia behind him, her arms crossed. “I have gotten so tired of Mother and Adam acting so lovey dovely all the damn time so I decided to come to the surface and visit you. Mother was right.  You are pretty.” He tried to touch her face, but Cordelia dodged him. “Hold on there! ‘Visiting’ would imply that we know each other. I’ve never seen you before in my life.” The boy seemed genuinely puzzled. “I’m Alexander Morningstar, the crowned prince of hell.” Something clicked in Cordelia’s mind. “You’re Lilith’s son?” “Yes, and you may call me Zander if you like. Now, I have a question for you. Why are you and those other witches from your coven going to see a mortal magic show? Don’t you know that stuff is all smoke and mirrors?” “Well, my friends are mortals so- “ Zander looked horrified. “You associate with mortals? Willingly? That must stop. It’s unbecoming for the future queen of hell.” Cordelia raised an eyebrow. “Did you just call me the future queen of hell? How on earth do you figure that?” “Well, we are betrothed, so obviously when I become king- “ “Hold on, did you just say betrothed? As in engaged? You’re crazy!  I’m only 12!” “So am I but it’s not up to us. It was all arranged by my mother and your parents when we were just infants.” Cordelia shook her head. “Now I know you’re lying. My parents would never do that to me.” Before Zander could respond, a voice called out. “Cordelia? Where are you?” “Coming, Mrs. Warner!” “Are those mortals bothering you? I could kill them for you if you like.” “No! You are not going to kill my friends! Go home to your mother!”  Cordelia ordered. “Don’t walk away from me!” “Go!” Zander flew through the air and hit the wall at the end of the alleyway.  “You have got to learn to control your divine powers.” Yet, Cordelia was already gone.

Faustus loved making love to his wife. In fact, he could make love to Zelda morning, noon, and night and still crave more of her. Therefore, he had no objection when Zelda woke him up early on Saturday morning and began to make love to him. They were both breathing heavily when she rolled off of him. “See? I told you I always get my man.” Faustus was shocked and horrified to see Zelda transform into Nina. “NO!” Faustus screeched as he sat up in bed. “Darling? What is it? What’s wrong?” Faustus turned to see the real Zelda lying beside him and he felt his lip begin to tremble.  “Darling, I’m been unfaithful!” “What?!” It was now Zelda’s turn to jolt up in bed. She was angry, but only for a moment until Faustus explained about his dream. Then she smiled and shook her head.   “Faustus, my darling, how many times must we go through this? It was only a dream and dreams don’t mean anything.” “I know! I know!”  Faustus muttered. “But why did it had to be about Nina Robinson? I don’t want that woman anywhere near my mind, this house and certainly not our bed!   It’s bad enough that I can’t escape that woman during the day! We share the same classroom, now we’re forced to codirect that damn play together. In fact, there’s another rehearsal this afternoon, so- “ “So, no wonder she’s on your mind. But mortals do not use glamour spells so it’s unlikely   your dream will come true.” “It was more like a nightmare,”  Faustus muttered. Soon Zelda had calmed her husband and as they lay side by side, Faustus wondering why Zelda was suddenly silent.  “Penny dreadful for your thoughts, my love?” “This is going to seem like an odd question since we had our own affair, but why was it that once you cheated on Constance left, right, and sideways without the slighted hint of guilt but you seemed ready to cry at the mere thought of being unfaithful to me?” “I wasn’t loyal to Constance because I never felt that I need to. Yes, we were married, but as you know, she was not my choice. At the wedding, I was just saying words, not vows.  With you, it’s the exact opposite. I’ve loved you since I was 16.  Your name is carved on my heart. I have spent years, decades dreaming, yearning to be your husband and the father of our children. Now, that Hecate has seen fit to bless me with all I could desire if I ever lost you for my own stupid, avoidable actions, I would never be able to forgive myself. I think that’s why these dreams freak me out so much. It’s not just about me having affairs, it really hurts that because of that damn curse that I can’t trust myself not to hurt you. I hate that.” “Then it’s a good thing that I trust you whole heartily,”  Zelda said softly before she kissed him. During the kiss, they could hear whining and scratching at the door.  “What’s wrong, Tom? You want out?” Zelda got out of bed and patted her familiar before she opened the door to let the dog out and then     Zelda got an idea, took off her underwear, and returned to the bed.   “You know, Faustus,” Zelda said as she slowly undid the cord of her husband’s PJs pants and exposed his manhood. “what I think you need right now is a good detraction.” Zelda kissed him deeply as she climbed on top of him. She broke the kiss only long enough to yank her nightgown over her head. As they reached their shared climax, Zelda moaned and bent back as Faustus left a trail of kisses from her stomach to her rib cage. “Feeling better?” Zelda smiled at him in the afterglow. Faustus smiled back. “After such a sweet distraction, how can’t I?” “Good.” Zelda leaned over and kissed him deeply again. It took everything Faustus had to stop her. “Dearest, you know I want this, but if we are missed at breakfast, they might come up here.” “Faustus, there is no ‘they’ to miss us. Cordy still at the Warners, Jake, and Ambrose decided to go with Dr. Cerberus to something called a comic a con.” Faustus propped himself on his elbow. “Are you saying that we have the house all to ourselves? That never happens! Well, the heaven with breakfast,” Zelda laughed as Faustus rolled onto her, pinning her arms down. “I say we celebrate!” Her husband declared. And boy, did they celebrate!  They made love for hours. They even felt like breaking out their old toys, the whips, chains, and the cat of 9 trails. Faustus laid back, sighing contently when he noticed that Zelda was up and reaching for her robe. “Where do you think you’re going?” “Downstairs,” Zelda answered. “It’s almost 2 p.m. and we’ve missed breakfast and lunch, I’m hungry. Besides, I need to keep my strength up for the 2nd round.” “In that case, I’ll come with you.” Down in the kitchen, Zelda and Faustus talked, laughed, and flirted as they made a meal together. Zelda chuckled as Faustus kissed her behind her ear as she stirred the pot. They both looked up as a knock came at the front door. “I’ll get it.” Faustus was in great spirits, however, he lost his smile as soon as he opened the door. “Faustus, baby!” “Mrs. Robinson, to what do I owe this unexpected visit?” “Oh Faustus, how many times do I have to tell you? You don’t have to be so formal? Just call me Nina.” “And how many times do I have to tell you? If there was a more formal way to call you than Mrs. Robinson, I would call you that. Now, what do you want?” Faustus demanded. Nina looked around before asking. “Where’s Cordelia?” “At a friend’s house.” “Great.” Before Faustus could figure out what was happening, Nina had stepped forward, grabbed him, and kissed him. Faustus struggled for a second before finally pushing her away. “What on earth are you doing?!” “Your daughter is in our class. I finally figured out that you don’t want Cordelia to tell your wife about us. That’s why you pretend not to like me at school.” For the love of Hecate! Faustus rolled his eyes. “I’m not pretending anything! I don’t like you. I never liked you and I never will like you.” They talked more and hearing voices, Zelda came out of the kitchen.  She could only see Nina from behind. “Can I help you?” Nina turned. “Yes. You can leave us alone.” Nina only got madder when Zelda came to join them. “Faustus, tell your employee to give us some privacy.” Faustus put an arm around Zelda.  “This isn’t my employee. This is Zelda, my wife.” Nina pointed. “This is Zelda…but I’m so prettier than her.” “No, all you are is rude,” Faustus grabbed Nina’s arm and guided her out the door. “You’re also out of    here.” Faustus shut the door in her face. Nina went down 4 steps when the door opened. “You can handle this afternoon’s rehearsal by yourself, right?” Faustus asked. “I suddenly feel very    sick.” He made a lame attempt at a fake cough and slammed the door again.

“Look, I’m not saying I don’t think the play is not good or anything. I just don’t think it’s great yet.” Sara said. Cordelia felt like screaming. Last night’s magic show had been fun, once she was able to put that odd boy and his crazy comments out of her mind. By the time they were back in Greendale, it was too late to do anything but sleep. The morning seemed peaceful enough she supposed, but the play rehearsal this afternoon took hours. Somehow, on the walk back to the Warner house, the subject of the Greendale 13 came up. Sure enough, right after supper, Cordelia followed her friend back into the cold October night to go visit Mary Wardwell. Cordelia wasn’t happy at all to see the very woman who shot and nearly killed her own mother. They finally stop talking about Greendale 13, only to start talking about the play again! Sara lit up. “I just got a great idea. I mean it, I’m a total genius! We should go to Salem ourselves. I mean, we should take the whole class on a field trip. To really understand the play.” “You’re right, that’s a great idea!” “Yeah, we should totally go to Salem!” “Cool!” Cordelia felt very uncomfortable as all eyes looked at her. “Um, I got to pee.” She grabbed her PJs and ran down the hallway to the bathroom. “Calm down,” Cordelia told herself in the mirror. “No one is going to Salem. They’re just thinking out loud.” After taking 5 minutes to calm down and get undressed, Cordelia returned to the triplet’s bedroom to find all the other girls on their phones. “What are you guys doing?” Cordelia asked. “We’re looking up how to get to Salem. Look guys, it says Salem is just 7 hours away by car.” So much for just thinking out loud. “Look, guys, I don’t think a field trip to Salem is such a good idea.  If it takes 7 hours to get there, it would take 7 more to get back.  That’s 14 hours in travel alone and suddenly we’re on an overnight trip. Given that the play is next Friday, I don’t think we have the time to fundraise enough.” “Typical Cordelia, always with the negative,” Sara muttered. “Oh, shut up, Sara!” “Lay off, Sara,” defended Erin. “She has been a better friend to us than you’re ever been!” “Why?!”  demanded a hurt Cordelia. “Just because I didn’t want to act in a stupid play?” Emily spoke up.  “Excuse you, but we chose that play!” Cordelia crossed her arms. “Why do I get the feeling that Sara picked the play and the 3 of you just went along with it because the longer we know Sara, the more you’re turning into sheep.  If I’m right, it begs the question, why would a self-proclaimed Wiccan chose a play about the Salem witch trials?” “’ Self-proclaimed?  It’s like you don’t believe me.” “I don’t. In fact, I think you’re lying about the whole thing.” Cordelia had to raise her voice against the triplets’ outcry. “Name 1 magical thing you’ve done since moving to Greendale.” Sara looked Cordelia right in the eye and said “I summoned the fear demon.” You remembered. Cordelia thought as the triplets showered Sara with awe. The fight continued for another hour, with raised voices and hot tempers. “Enough, I can’t stand this anymore!” Erin finally said. “Cordelia, I think it’s time you leave.” “What? Why me?” “Because you’re the 1 who started this fight.” Cordelia didn’t know about that but she was aware of the time. “You really want me to leave? Now? It’s 10:30 at night. I live across town; Sara lives down the street. Why doesn’t she leave?” No one said anything. Cordelia saw all the girls frowning all at once. Cordelia didn’t know what to think, but she knew the triplets had never thrown her out before. “Fine!” Cordelia stood up and swallowed back her tears. “I’m not going to stay anywhere where I’m not welcome.” Cordelia got redressed and gathered up her things before leaving the house. She secretly wished 1 of the triplets were stop her but no one did. Once the front door closed, Cordelia took out her phone and called Zelda. “Mom? The triplets threw me out. Can you come to pick me up please?” “Oh, Cordy. Your father and I are not home right now and- “ “Mom? Mom?!” Cordelia realized her phone was dead just as it started to drizzle.  “Just  perfect!” Seeing no other choice, Cordelia flipped up her neck collar and then drew the jean jacket closer to her body and ran all 5 blocks to Dr. C’s bookstore. The shop had been closed for hours, so the preteen took a detour and knocked as she could on the steel back door. She gave a huge sigh of relief when Hilda answered the door. “Thank Hecate, you’re here! I’m sorry for disturbing you this late, aunt Hil, but I didn’t know where else to go. The girls and I had a huge fight, the triplets threw me out of their house, but I don’t blame them, blame Sara. Now they’re talking about going to Salem. I can’t get a hold of Mom because my phone died and- and- “Cordelia burst into tears. Hilda hugged her niece close and then ushered her inside. After a quick phone call, Hilda discovered that Zelda was at the movies, in the middle of a double feature with Faustus and Sabrina. Hilda managed to convince her sister not to change her plans because Hilda wanted to spend some much overdue alone time with her night daughter. It was just after midnight that Cordelia put on her nightclothes for the 2nd time that evening. Since Dr. C was gone for the night, Hilda insisted that her niece share her bed for the night. The remote was on the bed so Cordelia jumped when she sat down and the TV turned on. “I’m sorry, Auntie H, I didn’t know the remote was on the bed.” “Oh, that’s okay, love. Looks like you literary just fell upon a classic, bewitched!” “Aw, the only witch show in pop culture that does make me want to scream, cry or throw up,” Cordelia said while getting under the covers. Hilda nodded. “You know every time I see this show, I think about your Uncle Edward and Aunt Diana.” “And a gender swap.” Hilda nodded. “Also, call me crazy, but little Tabitha always reminds me of Sabina as a baby.” Cordelia smiled, for she knew that there was a strong, powerful red-haired witch on the show. “Would that make Mom Endora?” The 2 witches looked at each other and laughed. It felt so good for Cordelia couldn’t remember how long ago she laughed so hard.

As hard as Cordelia laughed on Saturday night, she cried even harder on Wednesday afternoon. Zelda had to let her daughter cry on her shoulder for over an hour before Zelda got the full story. Apparently, Principal Hopper came in at the end of the day and announced that he had just discovered an envelope marked for the Salem trip on his desk had 5000 dollars in it. That, on top of parents’ donations, made the trip possible. They would travel on a deluxe bus and would be in Salem for 3 days and 2 nights. They would leave the day after tomorrow. It was unbelievable that this trip was put together in a mere 6 days. “I’m 12-year-old, Mom,” Cordelia said, tears streaming down her face. “I don’t want to die.” “You’re not going to die, Cordy.” “Your mother is right,” Faustus said, coming into Cordelia’s bedroom.  “I may have lost complete control of my classroom but I am still your father.  I say you’re not going to Salem and neither am I! That is final!”

It was final and none of the rest of the family ever bought up the subject. It was on Friday morning and in the middle of breakfast, Zelda looked around. “Where’s Cordelia? Her food is getting cold.” “I think she’s still in bed.” Said Jake. Faustus raised an eyebrow. “At this hour? You know your sister isn’t much for sleeping in. Even if she and I were excused from school today since the rest of the class left for Salem this morning.” “I know, but I bumped into her in the hall at 5 this morning. She was so excited to get a text from 1 of the triplets saying they didn’t want to leave without making up.” Faustus and Zelda exchanged a look. After their big fight, Cordelia and her friends hadn’t spoken in 5 days. The longest they ever went without speaking. When they did manage to talk yesterday, it only took Cordelia saying that she wasn’t going to Salem, to start the fighting again. “5 AM is pretty early and Cordy said she was going down to the school to talk to them for 10 minutes so that’s why I think she’s still asleep.” Jake continued. “I go get her.” “Thank you, Ambrose,”  Zelda said before turning back to the boys at the table. “We have to make this a fun and busy weekend for Cordy so she won’t think of the triplets or Salem too much.” “Sure, Mom.” Jake nodded as Faustus kissed his wife’s hand. A few minutes later, Ambrose rushed back in. “I’ve looked everywhere upstairs; I can’t find Cordelia. She’s gone!” “Gone?” “What do you mean she’s gone?!” “Hecate, no!” The 3 looked back to Faustus, who was now looking at his phone and had suddenly turned whiter than a ghost. “Darling, what is it?” “I just got an S.O.S text from Cordy. She’s stuck on that bus and it’s bound for Salem.”

[the-shadow-of-atlantis]

Truth in Blood Pt 7

Summary: Annabella starts to say her goodbyes

Tagging: @melyaliz @thespacebuns @coffee-randomness

A/N Jen belongs to @melyaliz

Read Earlier Parts Here

Annabella was grateful for the long drive back into Gotham, it gave her time to think, time to plan. It gave her time to figure out who to say goodbye to and how. First things first she needed to go to work and explain her absence.

It was moments like these that Annabella was grateful her friend and cofounder was in on the secret. Otherwise Annabella would have no idea how to explain how she'd be leaving. When Olivia saw her she hugged Annabella tightly and scolded her for ditching her so abruptly.

"Well you're gonna hate me even more." Annabella said a small humorless laugh escaping her.

They quickly went to Annabella's office and she plopped down on her chair suddenly feeling tired again. She wondered if she'd ever feel relaxed again in her life.

"What happened? You look a little like hell." Olivia asked sitting in the chair opposite of her.

Annabella tried her best to explain the situation. Trying to condense as much as she could but still make it make sense.

“Okay so.” Olivia said once Annabella finally finished, taking a deep breath. “So you come from a long line of witches?”

“Sure let's go with that.”

“But if there’s multiple kids then they have to compete to keep their magic sorta like survival of the fittest.”

“Yup.”

“But before that your mother ended up getting her little brother killed who was basically a prodigy then fled as soon as she won against her other brother and got involved in a lot of bad magic. Until one day she accidentally got pregnant with you and when your dad and grandmother wouldn’t let her get rid of you she grew to resent the three of you because instead of owning up to the fact that it was her that got her brother killed she blames your grandmother for not saving him.”

“Yup.”

“So when your mother kidnapped you that day before your birthday it wasn’t for some ransom deal with your dad it was to kill you and get her brother back. And the only reason you are just now realizing all of this is because all this time bruce has lied to you or found some way to alter some of your memories in order to ‘protect’ you and now that your ‘of age’ you are getting all of this as some messed up birthday gift?”

“Pretty much.” Annabella sighed as she rubbed her eyes.

“Well I see now why you’ve been MIA for the past few days.” Olivia leaned back in her chair and a soft worried smile crossed her face. “Where did you even go?”

“You remember my friend Kaldur?”

“Kaldur as in Aqualad Kaldur. Kaldur as in soon to be league member Kaldur. Kaldur as in also soon to be Aquaman Kaldur.”

“Yes him.”

“Ohhh okay, so you were with him huh.”

“Oh shut it.” Annabella rolled her eyes. “It’s not like that. I just needed a calm place to stay.”

“Why didn’t you just go to Jen?”

“I love her but sometimes she cant help but get into therapist mode sometimes and I didn't need that while I was still trying to process everything. Besides my family would just show up at her place if they knew I was there. At least with Kaldur it was far and secluded, it was peaceful.”

“So what are you going to do now?”

“That’s the part where you're going to hate me.” Annabella took a deep breath and leaned against her desk. “I have to go away, at least a year. I have magic now and I need to go to a place where I can learn to control it… I just… I don't want to end up like my mom.”

“So you’re going to need me to take over while you're gone.” Olivia said and Annabella nodded.

Olivia got up and went to kneel down by Annabella’s side. “You helped get this place built from the ground up when you were only 13. You’ve given everything to this place for four years. If you need to take time to find yourself, take it.”

Annabella smiled and hugged her tightly. “You’re the best.”

“Don't you forget that. I would like to go on a vacation as soon as you get back.”

“Deal.” Annabella laughed as she pulled away.

“When are you heading out?”

“As soon as I finish confronting my father, I just need to say bye to one person first.” Annabella sighed as she got up.

Standing in front of her cousin's apartment Annabella almost wanted to chicken out. Instead she steadied her nerves and knocked. The door opened after a couple of seconds and Jen stared at her wide eyed.

“Hey.” Annabella said softly as she slightly waved.

“Hey?” Jen repeated sarcastically. “Hey? You’ve been gone for almost a week. No calls no texts no replied no nothing. And you just come back and say hey?”

Annabella was about to speak when Jen brought her in for a bone crushing hug and then she felt it. All of Jen's concern, her fear, her relief, her pain. Everything that she had probably been holding in for the days Annabella was gone was coming out in waves making her feel guilty every time a new emotion washed over her.

“I’m sorry.” Annabella whispered as she hugged her cousin, rubbing her back soothingly.

“You just disappeared, and then Bruce wouldn’t say where you were, Dick was no help either and even Tim couldn’t find you.” Jen sighed as she pulled away her hand resting on Annabella’s cheek then dropping down to her shoulder.

“I’m sorry I just… I had to get away from here, away from... him. I knew that if I came here they’d follow me.”

“What happened?” Jen asked, finally bringing Annabella inside. “Where have you been?”

“I’ve been at Kaldurs trying to gather my thoughts, I figured that would be the last place he would go looking for me.”

“He? Who exactly are you talking about?” Jen asked as she settled into her couch.

Annabella took a deep breath as she settled on the little recliner. She dove into the story starting from the beginning and giving more detail than she had shared with Olivia. Jen said nothing opting to listen intently to everything Annabella had to say. Once Annabella finished her story she brought her knees up to her chest and hugged them.

“You… you didn't know about any of this did you?” Annabella asked quietly, staring down at the floor, not wanting to meet her cousin's eyes.

“No.” Jen sighed as she rubbed her eyes. “Even if I did I wouldn’t be able to hide this from you, you know I suck at that. But now… now things are making sense. God Bruce what were you thinking.”

“I’m leaving.” Annabella said as she turned to look out the window.

“What do you mean by that?” Jen asked.

“I mean I’m leaving Gotham for a while. There's a place I can go where I can learn more about all of this.”

“Where will you go?”

“I'm not entirely sure yet. I know it’s somewhere in Mexico.” Annabella felt Jens worry start to seep through again. “I won't be gone too long, maybe a year. Jen I need to do this I need to learn more about myself and I can't do that here. I can't do that with him hovering over me.”

Jen frowned but Annabella felt her understanding start to come through.

“Will you be in contact?” Jen asked hopefully.

“I’ll try, but I can't make any promises. I'm not really sure how things will be like where I’m going. But I will promise that I am coming back.” Annabella got up and settled next to Jen on the couch, wrapping her arms around her and hugging her tightly.

“When will you go?” Jen asked and again Annabella felt her small sense of hope, hope that maybe she can hold on just a little bit longer.

“As soon as I speak to my father.” Annabella sighed, then jumped when she felt her stomach growl.

“One last Batburger run?” Jen asked slightly laughing but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

“Might as well.” Annabella smiled at least she could give her cousin this.

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Dream Come True

Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader, Sam Winchester

Word Count: 922

Warnings: just fluff

Summary: You’re kind of a big deal in the hunter community, and Dean doesn’t hide his inner fanboy when he finally meets you.

Squared Filled: Sam Winchester // Fangirl/boy moment

Author’s Note: This is for @spndeanbingo and @spnfluffbingo2019 respectively and this is unbeta’d and any and all mistakes are all on me.

Feedback the glue that holds my writing together

Tags at the bottom

“She’s right there, Sammy. Fucking look at her,” Dean said as he slapped his brother’s arm. If he was an emoji, he would be the heart-eyed one. The one hunter that might be better than the Winchesters was sitting right across the room from them ordering a drink at the bar.

“She’s just a person, Dean. Quit acting like you’re 10 and the popular older girl is talking to you,” Sam scoffed as he looked your way. He must admit he was impressed with the things you’ve done, but he wasn’t going to act like you were some God or something.

“Dude, do you even know who she is? She single-handedly took out 2 nests of vampires by herself and left it without so much as a scratch on her body. She’s been possessed so many times, it’s a wonder why she doesn’t have one of our tattoos on her. She’s fought demons within herself because she believes that it’s better if demons possess her instead of some innocent person. She’s gotten into fights with Angels and the only injury she got was a scratch on the cheek. Monsters hide in fear when they hear her name.”

“Yeah, they do the same thing with us,” Sam interrupted his brother.

“No, Sammy, they challenge us because they think they have a shot at beating us. No, they fucking run and hide at the sound of her name. She’s a fucking goddess,” he said as he admired you as you talked with the bartender.

“Look at you, you’re smitten with a woman who you don’t even know. I’m sure you would have no problem getting her number.”

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Dean asked as he tore his eyes from you for the first time that night. “I am not going to treat her like I do with the other women. Those other women I use for a good time for a night or two. Y/N is special. She deserves someone to appreciate her to ravish her body as if they had forever with her.”

“Okay, dude, stop,” Sam grimaced. “I don’t need to hear about your sex life.”

“You asked for it,” he shrugged as he went back to staring at you lovingly. It was true of what Dean said about you. You have done all of those things and more. You are the most known hunter across the whole world. Anyone who has ever hunted or even thought about hunting had heard of you. In your mind, the only reason why you were so tough is because you grew up in the foster system. It provided you with the kind of training that normal households don’t get. The other kids roughed you up, tore down your walls, degraded you, and then tossed you out into the world only to have another family do the same thing to you. The two things you learned from the foster system was that it was you against the world, and to protect those who have less than you. It’s why you got into hunting in the first place. The foster system made it really easy to travel the country to do odd jobs because your homes were scattered throughout the United States.

No one ever taught you anything about the hunting lifestyle. The first time you got into it, a group of demons raided your home and took what they were looking for since your foster mom had gotten mixed up in some of their business. She had made a deal with them ten years prior to become a very successful foster mom, and you witnessed the hellhounds tearing her apart. It’s something that scarred you for life, but it also encouraged you to dig deeper into what happened. Ever since that night, you had been hunting in the way you taught yourself.

There was a lot of trial and error, and more often than not, you came home battered and bruised. The other good thing about the foster system is that they didn’t really care how many bruises and cuts you had--they figured some of the other kids got rough when playing. They usually looked the other way when they saw a kid with injuries. It was a terrible thing to do, but you let that teach you a lesson. You were truly on your own in the world, and you could depend on no one to aid you in whatever you needed. If someone else could do it, then you could do it yourself.

Your whole life you’ve lived by that motto which is why you hated the fact that you were in this bar seeking help. There usually wasn’t a hunt that you couldn’t do on your own, but this one was a big one. As tough as you were, you could not do this hunt alone, so you sought out the second-best hunters in the business which is why you were in this bar.

You heard of the Winchesters through many hunter bars. They were the hot spot for gossip so you were able to pick up on a few things very quickly. They���ve been doing this gig for their whole life, so you knew they were bound to know a few tricks that maybe you didn’t know of. This hunt required all the manpower you could gather, and since you didn't trust easily, you thought the next best hunters would have to do rather than a whole bar of average hunters.

The monster you were hunting was so rare, even veteran hunters thought they were myths. There had been sightings of a Phoenix, and you knew you had to kill it. It would not only add to your rap sheet, but you could cross that monster off your supernatural bucket list. The only problem was that they were so hard to catch and especially harder to kill. Iron hurt the sons of bitches, but they were smart. The only other thing that could kill them was the Colt which you knew the Winchesters had in their possession, and you knew they weren't going to just hand it over to you because you asked. It was better to kill the Phoenix from a distance rather than up close, which is why you needed the Winchesters.

“She’s my dream woman, Sammy,” Dean sighed dreamily.

“Then go ask her out,” he laughed.

“Do I look like I’d be worthy enough?” Dean gasped.

“Do you think you’d be ‘worthy enough’ to talk to her? Because she’s on her way over here,” he said as he sipped his drink. Every nerve in Dean’s body froze up at his comment, and despite staring at you from afar, he could barely look at you as you approached them.

“Sam and Dean Winchester?” you asked.

“Y-you know our names?” Dean sputtered.

“Yeah, I do,” you chuckled.

“Forgive him. You’re like a superstar in his eyes,” Sam teased as his brother kicked him in the shin from under the table.

“Do I really have that honor?” you joked back.

“W-what are you doing here?” Dean asked as he tried to be cool about this.

“I need your guys’ help with a hunt. I hate asking for help, so it’s serious when I do.”

“You’re the best hunter in the business,” Dean started to ramble. “You know how to kick ass even better than I do. Not to mention that you’re amazingly beautiful. It’s bewildering how you can do what you do and still look so good.”

“Thank you, Dean. You’re not so bad yourself,” you complimented him as he blushed adorably. Sam has never seen his brother so speechless over a woman before.

“What kind of hunt do you need our help with?” Sam asked.

“A Phoenix has popped up on my radar. You two are the only ones who have killed one before. I could just ask for the Colt, but I’d rather get the opportunity to work with you two. It’s not every day a woman gets to be in the presence of two handsome men such as yourself,” you flirted. Sam didn’t take it personally, but Dean was a whole different story. He was such a mess over you, Sam smirked when he got an idea.

“We’d be glad to help. We only have two rooms though, but I’m sure my brother is willing to share. I would, but my bed is already so small.”

“Do you mind me sharing a room with you Dean?” you asked. You could have bought your own room, but something about spending the night with Dean Winchester got your inner slut to bounce awake.

“Not at all,” he said breathlessly.

“Great. Oh, and just to warn you, I sleep with only my panties on. Will that be a problem?”

Sam laughed at the look on his brother’s face. If Dean wasn’t supported by the chair, he would have collapsed on the floor.

“Yeah, sounds good,” he barely got out.

“Great. I’ll just bring my ‘59 Cadillac around to the front,” you grinned as you walked away from the brothers.

“I’m marrying her, Sammy,” Dean said with the biggest dreamy eyes he could muster up.

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[miraclejune]

HERO’S SOUP: Chapter 13

Thousand Hearts

Monday morning. The mansion was in chaos. 

Hyunjin was running late again because he ‘overslept’. Woojin had to drag him out of his warm blanket earning a low groan from the Beta.

Changbin left first with Chan and Jisung, the only people who weren’t busy for the day, they volunteered to help Changbin with his studio. Well, he had to buy them each a new pair of sneakers next week so it’s not quite volunteering if you might ask.

“Minho? Felix? Where are you guys headed?” Felix adjusted the strap on his backpack before turning to Woojin. “We’re gonna head out for a while. There’s a popular new spot for busking down at Hongdae. We’re gonna check it out.” Minho tapped his feet letting them snuggle in his shoes perfectly. “Eric’s outside.” the two of them dashed out the mansion yelling their goodbyes.

"Remember to stop by the cafe later!" Woojin reminded them with a shout as he closed the front door.

“I didn’t even get to say hi to Eric.”

Woojin rolled his eyes, tugging the towel around the wolf’s waist. Almost revealing a damp and stark naked Hyunjin. “DUDE! What the hell.” Hyunjin gasped and tried to cover his body. They were the only ones left in the house but he was over-dramatic without fail.

“You could’ve exchanged your pleasantries if you weren’t so busy reading each fucking comment in your Instagram posts last night.” Hyunjin huffed, fastening the towel as he stormed to his room. Woojin chuckled, Hyunjin was the second easiest to tease. The first place would always be Changbin. Hands down, that idiot is so gullible.

He looked at the clock, ah they’re terribly late. It was 9 am, and their call time was 1 pm. We can’t really see any problem with that, as a matter of fact, they had plenty of time. However…

“Hwang Hyunjin don’t you fucking dare do your tedious make-up routine. Busan is not a 5-minute drive.” Hyunjin shot up from his vanity table’s seat as he heard the alpha’s growl at the end of his sentence. Woojin was in full-on Manager mode. 

He made a break for it. Snatching his backpack behind the door, simultaneously combing back his damp hair. He hopped the last 3 flights of stairs stopping in front of a brooding Woojin. Hyunjin suddenly remembered that one time Chan said Woojin looks like a hostile bear when he's mad. At that time he couldn't quite see it but now, Woojin kinda did resemble his description.

"Why can't we just take the train." Hyunjin eyed Woojin fastening his seatbelt, he earned another deathly glare. The terrified wolf gulped and decided to put his feet down from the dashboard. "Sorry."

Woojin pulled into the road. "It's better to have our own car just in case we finish late." 

Hyunjin quietly nodded. "Plus, you're a head-turner. It's gonna be a pain in the ass." Woojin might've done what Chan told him not to. Actually, there were too many to list but this one thing is on the top. "Hm." 

Hyunjin likes being praised. His confidence and self-esteem shots up. It's good, Chan said it's fine to praise the boys every once in a while. But, Hyunjin's a lost case. "Wouldn't want to get chased for hours by scouts." Woojin caught a glimpse of Hyunjin's face from his peripheral vision as the wolf said those words.

Oh gosh, he's done it now.

-

Seungmin didn’t have council work today, nor Jeongin had class. It was their University's anniversary so the school decided to let the students rest for the holiday. Leaving the two college students with nothing to do.

"Hey, can you get the door!" 

"Okay." 

Seungmin stood in front of the open door, his head moved about figuring out who opened the door. "He's in the kitchen." Seungmin's eyes fell on the boy who looked much like a smaller version of Yang Jeongin. He gave the kid a smile before following suite inside the house.

He calmly made his way to the living room, sitting down on the left side of the sofa near the window. Jeongin's little brother comes back from upstairs, a switch on his right hand. Seungmin eyed as the boy sprawled on the carpet. He spotted the pile of snacks on top of the coffee table. Seungmin smiled, it seems like someone's enjoying their free time.

"Hey, Seungs!" Jeongin appears from the kitchen wiping his soap ridden hands on a strawberry shortcake apron. "Can you wait for a while? I'm just finishing up with the dishes." 

"Seriously? Strawberry Shortcake?" 

Jeongin's eyes blinked at the blinding light of a camera flash. "Don't you dare---"

"And... sent! This is gonna leave them in stitches." Seungmin tipped back his head and roared with laughter. Jeongin looked at her with disbelief, Seungmin did the exact opposite of what he was about to say.

"What on earth are you laughing about now? Delete it! And this isn't even mine! It's my moms!!" 

Seungmin abruptly stopped laughing and looked Jeongin dead in the eyes, "Nnnnnnnnno." he made sure to enunciate the 'N' just to irk Jeongin's nerves before resuming his laughter.

"You look ridiculous." Jeongin's little brother got ahold of Seungmin's phone that fell on the carpet next to him. "Ugh. I hate you all so much." he groaned and stomped his way to the kitchen. 

-

"Ma'am, what do you think of my friend? Isn't he adorable?"

"Oh my! That's a very cute apron he's got there haha! Here, take these fish cakes, it's in the house for making my day!"

"Thank you so much!"

"Jeongin, where are your manners?"

"T-thank you." the boy bowed his head. His blush seared through his cheeks and for a minute he thought her face was on fire. Jeongin suddenly felt embarrassed and delicate; even going as far as attempting to hide his rosy features behind his slim fingers. 

He eventually took action and dragged Seungmin outside the small snack shop. Jeongin swears he could see Seungmin smiling from behind him. The witch picked up his pace and walked beside the blushing boy.

And there he was in his arrogant triumph, Seungmin smirked - just a small pouting of the lips; a narrowing of the eyes and a tilting of the head. It was so subtle, it was even more infuriating for Jeongin who caught a glimpse of it after making the foolish mistake.

"You don't have to show that photo to EVERY person we meet today!" face the color of an overripe tomato and annoyance boiling inside, Jeongin could only groan. "No way. It'd be a shame to devoid the world with this gem. Plus, we get free food." Seungmin held up his phone in front of the boy, irking Jeongin's nerve some more.

After a few minutes of Seungmin annoying Jeongin and at some point his phone was thrown to the pavement, they reached Changbin's studio. Well, where the building was located to be precise. It had 4 floors and looked fairly new. The paint on the walls was still fresh and some windows don't have 'windows' on them yet, just the frame.

"3rd floor. 2nd door to the right." Jeongin recalled what Changbin told them yesterday. "Let's go, strawberry shortcake." Jeongin disregarded the nickname and followed Seungmin inside the building, they headed towards the door with the stairs logo on it. "Elevator's working." the old guard chirped. They turned around and met with his wizened eyes. "Thank you." he gave them a smile and went out of the building.

Chan, Changbin and Jisung or 3racha as the others would lump them, didn’t know they were coming so they decided to surprise them with some chicken, rice rolls and spicy rice cakes (of course they bought it lol don’t let these kids near the kitchen). All in which Seungmin showed his photo to.

As they opened the glass door, Seungmin expected the place to be an utter mess. It was plausible. The building smelled new inside too. So renovations are most likely on-going.

However, both were surprised to see the place neat and tidy. A few boxes were neatly piled on the corner, there was no hint of renovation at all. Surprisingly enough, the AC blasted on the side.

"Looks like it's fully operational now."

"Yeah." Jeongin took a look around. The place looks nice.

Seungmin yelled over and walked towards the adjacent room. "Hello, dweebs. We have brought you some snacks." Changbin hit his head under the tattoo chair. "Fuck! Dude what the hell. You scared the crap out of me."

Seungmin pursed his lips "Mm. Then you better check your diaper, you big baby." he put the paper bags on the small coffee table near the wall, before offering a hand to Changbin who was massaging his sore spot. "Where's the old dude and the squirrel?" He carefully sat down on the chair Changbin was fixing. "It's fixed. You can sit." Changbin said, turning around to gather the tools. He closed the toolbox with a click and placed it near the door.

He noticed Jeongin looking around. A smile automatically crept on his face. "Jeongin." the boy yelped and found Changbin leaning on the door frame smiling at him. He smiled back. "Changbin! The place looks so cool." he was naturally pulled into a tight hug. 

'Always so warm.' the boy thought as he hugged the wolf back. "Did Chan help with the designing?" 

"Of course he did. This place looks like the black hole itself." Seungmin muttered from inside the room. Changbin and Jeongin chuckled. "Yeah, he has this aesthetic that's suited for a tattoo shop."

"Can't deny that."

"You didn't answer my question Changbin." Seungmin whined. "They're out buying some stuff needed. They'll be back soon." he turned around and went back into the room. "Just stay there, Jeongin. It's still dusty here." Jeongin sat down on the chairs provided. So, Chan and Jisung are out. 

The room is like a perfect magazine cover for an aesthetic tattoo shop. Jeongin was afraid to sit, worrying he would wrinkle the fabric or stain it with something he doesn't know on his pants. The leather couch is inlaid with rhinestones; placed so delicately. The white curtains are linen, the kind of white that is untouched by hands and devoid of dust. Those types of curtains that leaves the room in complete darkness even in mid-day, it stood out the most because of the black walls. Jeongin's eyes fell on the velvet walls they were decorated with stripes, which he thought he was just hallucinating but they really do reflect when you move around. The floor is a high polished wood, dark and free of either dust or clutter. The photographs are black and white, arranged to look like such by a professional, must be photos taken by Seungmin. One photo caught his attention. He stood up and sheepishly walked towards it. 

It was their group photo from when Woojin showed him his room in the mansion.

The door shot open. "We're back--Oh Jeongin you're here!" Jisung instantly dropped the contents on his hand and engulfed the boy in a tight hug. Little did he know Chan was right behind him. "FUCK!!! Dude my foot!" Chan sat on the floor, the sudden pain weakened the back of his knees.

Jisung didn't care at all. He detached himself from Jeongin for just a second before putting an arm around his shoulder, looking down on Chan. "Has anyone told you, you look great kneeling down like that?" A very annoyed vampire looked up to both of them. Color drained from their faces.

"W-we brought food! You guys must be hungry, it's in the tattoo room!" Jisung cleared his throat, pulling Jeongin away from a fuming Chan. "Cool! Let's go! We're starving. Right, Chan?" that must be the stupidest question he has ever asked and do note that he asks a lot of halfwitted questions. Jeongin could've sworn he saw Seungmin face-palming hard inside his head.

They gathered inside the tattoo room, Jeongin swept the floor a bit while the others moved the boxes and other stuff outside to make room. "Pull the table near there." Jisung did what Chan told him. His grudge only lasted a few seconds. They're back to normal as if Jisung never made a snarky remark earlier.

Seungmin sat on the floor with Changbin while Chan and Jeongin situated themselves on the leather couch fit for two. Jisung, on the other hand, went out of the waiting area and grabbed one of the ottoman chairs provided. 

Changbin watched in disgust as Jisung stuffed his face with rice cakes. Shaking his head, his right hand became busy. Seungmin fought with him for the tuna rice rolls. Changbin turns to Jeongin with a smile on his face, "You kids don't have school today?" obviously Seungmin lost. He pouted and took a plain roll, angrily putting it in his mouth.

"Nope. It's our school's anniversary so we're on a break. Only for today though." the boy replied. He turns to Chan who was offering him a piece of the rice roll. Jeongin opens his mouth letting Chan feed him. "Like a baby chick." Jisung said before scarfing down a chicken leg.

"Am not!" 

"Yeah, he's not." Jeongin was thankful for Changbin siding with him. "He's not only Chan's baby. He's our baby!" ...nevermind.

Within a span of a few minutes, all the food was gone. The four of them finished everything. It would've been gone within a second if everyone else was there. Oh, Chan excluded.

They talked about the place for a while. Seungmin was suggesting a few things here and there while Jeongin and Jisung played with Chan's switch. The vampire went out to the restroom.

"Hey, Wooj. How's the trip so far?" Chan's voice echoed a bit inside the empty restroom. Since the building was fairly new, there were only a few tenants. And today they were the only ones there. "It's great. Hyunjin complained for 10 minutes straight before I knocked him out." Chan chuckled, he knew what the alpha meant by 'knocked him out'. "He blabbers nonsense then falls asleep after eating a snack. Like a baby." Woojin laughed on the other end. There was a short pause as he switched lanes and shifted gears. "How's the shop going?"

Woojin heard the sound of the faucet being opened. He waited for a while for the vampire to respond. "It's pretty much done. We just have to recycle the boxes and clean up a bit. Seungmin and Jeongin are here too."

"I know." Chan complained about why he didn't tell him. "Because they said it was a surprise! I don't wanna spoil it." Hyunjin stirred in his sleep, the blanket he pulled up fell on the side. "Hang on, Chan." 

Woojin fixed the blanket, making sure to glance on the road every once in a while. "Did you find out some info about the Sofia's?"

"No. Man, those guys have a shit ton of people yet we can't get ahold of any useful information. They're too secure." Chan couldn't agree more on what Woojin said. He lived at that place for decades yet he hasn't heard of a spy nor a mole from outside. The information he knows about that family was only their rules and regulations within the clan. He was not given a word on how they manage their operations and business. 

Although he did only live there because of Kazuo's grandfather who trained him. It was strictly just training. Chan would wake up, be served breakfast in his room, clean up and train. His free time outside would involve 5 guards and 10 undercover guards as he roamed the streets of Tokyo. 

"Maybe I should go stop by. Can you book me a flight to Japan tonight?" he closed the restroom door behind him. Chan dawdled a bit at the hall. He should finish this conversation before going back inside the shop.

"Tomorrow. I'll go with you."

"Alright. Drive safely."

Woojin's voice vanished. "Okay, maybe another call." He dialed a new number, after a few rings Chan could hear the bustling sound of a busy street. "Felix? Where you at?"

"We're at Hongdae with Eric." Chan could hear Minho and Eric arguing in the background, he smiled. "You guys found a new spot?"

"Yeah---hey save some for me, you dickheads. Oi fuckwit!!!---Hey, we're just waiting for our turn." Felix's accent comes out when he's preoccupied too. Chan should note that.

"How's the shop going?" Felix reached out for Minho but he already has the phone to his ear. "Oh hey, Minho. We're almost done. Just cleaning up a bit." 

The phone was passed around for a while. It was impressive of Chan to know who he's talking to. Maybe because this happens on a daily basis when it comes to phone calls. 

"We'll drop by Woojin's cafe later. Are you guys coming by?"

"Yeah. Since you mentioned it."

Chan smiled, hearing Felix's deep chuckle. 

"Alright! See you there!"

"Bang bang chan chan see you~" was Minho.

"I'll come by the mansion on Saturday! I'm so gonna own these idiots in Mario Kart." and that was Eric.

The three boys on the other line argued for quite some time. Chan waited for Felix to end the call before slipping his phone inside his pocket. 

He sighed, recalling his talk with Woojin. They had no lead on why Kazuo knows about who Jeongin was. Maybe it was just him? Maybe the guy's just messing with him? Kazuo always did that when he was part of their clan. Chan rested his hand on his neck, he could feel the mark of the Sofia underneath Seungmin's spell.

It was a flame-shaped mark burned into your skin by the existing leader of the clan. It takes weeks for the wound to heal (even for Chan) but the scar will never fade, even if you rip your skin off it will still be embedded in your flesh. Not even a tattoo can cover it up. Chan had Seungmin put a spell on it to make it disappear from the eyes. But if you touch that part, you would still feel the mark on your hands.

Flashbacks from the Sofia's mansion played in his head. He was rather fond of those memories, although only handpicked ones. He had no idea of what that place was and what they were doing behind closed doors. Every time he would ask the staff responsible for him, they would turn a blind eye and excuse himself/herself for a stupid reason. The next day, the staff would be replaced by a new one. It happened a couple of times until Chan realized that it was his fault, so he completely stopped asking anyone and just went his merry way.

"What are you thinking, boy?" Chan felt his heartbeat in his chest, pounding, banging, trying to get out. His breath hitched as his head snapped at the end of the hall. 

Standing near the window, an old man wearing a security guard uniform. The smile on his face was calm and warm. But Chan knew otherwise. It was just one of her disguises. Underneath that was a demon. Skin almost translucent, blood-sucking fangs bared at him, her small waist was bound by a tight corset showing off her inhumane figure. Purple and red eyes devoid of emotion, pitiless. Her face is every woman and man's desire.

But Chan was rather focused on what was running through her veins. The blood flowed like a lazy river. It flowed like so much red gravy across the slaughterhouse floor. The metallic scent wafted through the air right into his nostrils. 

He ran forward, every second craving for the woman's blood, he felt as though his own blood were on fire. His limbs were moving on their own. He was disconnected from everything but the ever-present sound of his drumming heart.

'I need it. I need it. I need it.' He spoke those words like a mantra. Again and again and again. 

The figure didn't move, she stayed there. Her hands were open, almost like a trap. As Chan plunges, he was pulled into a hug. The old man vanished, there stood the woman underneath it. 

"Hello. It's been a while, boy." Chan was shaking, his blood-red pupils dilated, claws scratching at the woman's back, his body trembled all over. Chan was no longer himself.

"Let's go home, shall we?" 

"LET HIM GO!" Changbin's voice roared. It was almost as if the building itself shook. One by one they all stood across the unknown person holding Chan. Jeongin could see how Chan shook underneath his grip. "Isn't that the guard from earlier?" Seungmin nodded, he pulled Jeongin from the front. "Stay behind Jisung." 

He stood behind Jisung who gave him a reassuring smile. Somehow Jisung was trembling too. Jeongin didn't know why. He was not strong nor have abilities but he wanted to somehow help Jisung. Jeongin snatched Jisung's right hand and filled the gaps with his own. 

"Thank you." Jisung felt calmer. He could feel Jeongin's thumb caressing his hand to distract him from his fear. He knew he had to be strong for the boy.

"What do you want from him?" Seungmin asked in a cold tone. But his head was filled with mindless thoughts.

The old man stared at them. No words were uttered between them. His lips slowly formed into a menacing smile. 

"He asked you a question." Changbin growled. In a split second, he transformed into his wolf form. The old man's smile grew wider and wider until it literally reached his ears, his pupils turned white and blood came out of his eyes. It was a disgusting sight. 

Jeongin shivered. The chills on his spine won't go away. The back of his knees were giving up, his hand gripped Jisung's tighter. 

They breathed in as the old man started chuckling. His laughter filled their ears almost as if he was standing right beside them. Changbin growled so loud. He was pissed. Chan wasn't trying to escape at all. What are they supposed to do? Woojin wasn't there. Jeongin is probably so scared and this... this being is giving him all sorts of scary feelings. It's as if he was staring right at the devil himself.

Changbin growled once more. He had to do something!

"Changbin!" Jisung shouted.

In the blink of an eye, Changbin's battered body fell on the floor. Before he could even take one step, he was already banged against the wall. They didn't even see what happened. 

The crumbs on the wall fell on his fur. He may have broken ribs and legs. He could feel a gush of blood underneath him, but he remained conscious. Struggling to get back on his feet only to fall back on the wet floor. 

The rest of them were left in utter shock. It was as if the scene had knocked every wisp of air from their lungs, and they stood there struggling to inhale, to exhale, to do anything. 

"Jisung, get Changbin and Jeongin out of here." Seungmin's voice went an octave lower. He loosened his tie. "But, Seungmin!" 

"NOW!!!!!!" his hair turned white and his eyes were a striking shade of purple. With a snap of a finger, 3 spell books emerge from thin air, floating around him. Seungmin had no time for Jisung to put up a fight. 

Jisung's head hung low, he knew he had to do something. But after seeing Changbin almost killed within a fraction of a second, he chickened out. He wanted to run. He wanted to get out of there. But as he saw how Jeongin's eyes looked at him in fear, he wanted to kill the living shit out of the old man across them.

He wanted to claw the man's organs out.

"Jisung. Today's not your fight." Jisung looked up to see Seungmin staring at him with his purple eyes. They were pleading him to go. 

"Please." he bellowed, snatching Changbin, who went back to human form, he put the injured wolf on his back. "Jeongin, gimme your hand." he said to the boy sitting on the floor, trembling in fear.

No. He doesn't want to go either. He can't leave. He doesn't even have the energy to stand up. "Jeongin, I'll get Chan back. I promise." tears formed in his eyes as he looked up to Seungmin. 

Jeongin took a deep breath and stood up. He took Jisung's outstretched hand. "Please stay safe, Seungmin." the witch can only give him a half-assed smile. He turns his head back after seeing Jisung, Changbin, and Jeongin disappear out the window. 

Suddenly the air became heavier. The building felt like it was gonna collapse any second. And there he saw the old man was just a mere figure drenched in blood. The smell was gut-churning. Seungmin could feel the vomit behind his throat. This is insane.

"You..." the witch couldn't make out the words the monster was saying. It was only like a rumble.

"You found him." 

Found who?

"SHIT!" the monster started shrieking. It was so loud. Seungmin could feel his ears bleed. He couldn't see where Chan was anymore. His vision was blurry. He eventually fell to his knees, screaming in pain.

-

"Seungmin. Wake up." the witch felt a light tapping on his cheek. He groaned. Was it a nightmare? But as his hands felt the cold wet floor, he knew that horrific scene really did happen.

His eyes slowly adjusted, he saw a bloody Chan. "A-are you okay?" seeing Seungmin in that state, Chan felt like he could cry. "Yeah." he supported him, letting the witch rest his back against the also bloody wall. "What happened?" As Seungmin looked around, he realized it wasn't only Chan who was bloody. The hall was covered in thick, pungent blood. 

"I took her heart." Chan held up his right hand. Confined in his sharp claws was a heart, beating only once a minute. A spellbook flew beside Seungmin, he glanced at it for a second before holding up his hand on the heart. His eyes and hair glow white and as he closed his hand like a fist, the heart burst, painting Chan's face with its blood.

"So it's done?"

"No. I only got two." Seungmin nodded. They had a long way to go, indeed.

"I never thought she would show up, Seungmin. Not in this century. Not with you guys in it." Seungmin can feel the weight underneath Chan's words. In front of him was a very vulnerable vampire.  

"Woojin's coming back." Seungmin said. Woojin was the only one who knows what to do in these types of situations.

"He knew something was wrong."

Chan balled his hands into a fist. He wiped the blood from his face. "Thank you for making the right decision."

"Jisung's a bit stubborn but he's a big softie when it comes to promises. Just like Jeongin."

Chan somehow managed to smile at Seungmin. "But, Changbin's in critical condition." the smile vanished as if it was never there. Changbin always thinks he has to take action whenever a dire situation comes up. He doesn't want to depend on other people even if they offer him help.

"Let's go find them. I'll call someone to clean this up." Chan stood up and pulled out his phone, thank god it wasn't crushed. "Do you have the strength to fix the wall?" Seungmin was already on it. 

After the last piece of crumbled cement vanished into the wall, Seungmin turned to Chan. "Did you lose yourself?"

Chan stopped from his tracks. His head hung, he stared at the blood-ridden floor with an empty gaze. "Yeah."

"How much blood did you get?"

"None. I couldn't reach that heart."

Seungmin nodded mindlessly. So it was the old man's blood. He walked towards Chan, not minding the blood pooling on his shoes. Seungmin put a heavy hand on Chan's shoulder making the vampire turn to him. 

Chan likes cuddling with them. Whether they were watching a movie or just hanging out in the living room. His hugs were warm because he adjusts his temperature to make them feel comfortable.

But as Seungmin held him in his arms, the biting cold chilled his fingers into clumsy numbness, cold seeped into his toes and spread painfully throughout his feet as if it were his bare feet on the pristine icy whiteness rather than sneakers on a blood river.

Chan was cold.

[angrypixie-sarisa]

The other Winchester

Piedras Rodantes Pt. 13

Sam x Mexican!Witch!fem!reader x Dean (polyamorous)

Summary: Two months had passed, Sam was definetely in hell and there was nothing to do about it. And then, you met Dean. 

Warnings: swearing, fighting. 

Do i have an excuse for putting this GIF other than loving the scene and Tessa Thompson? Nope. 

GIF’s not mine, credits and love to the owner. 

Dean came out of the bar he was at. He had been catching a bite with his co-workers and as soon as he finished his food and made some more small talk, he called it a day. He usually used Lisa as an excuse, but to be completely honest, it felt weird. He wasn’t used to having friends that weren’t hunters and his hunter friends, the real ones, they were all primarily dead. It felt like everything he did, accepting to go out and grab a bite or a beer was more for the facade he put in front of others, another character like the so many FBI agents he used to play.

With Lisa, it was another story. He felt more relaxed with her and Ben. He got to live that dream he thought it was long lost. He had a family.

As Dean started climbing his pick-up, a shadow caught his eye. He looked around, only to catch a female moving figure exiting the bar. He knew you. Well, not exactly, but he had seen you, everywhere. You just had acquired a small house in the same neighborhood as Lisa’s. You had passed several times through their street, jogging, and also were at almost all the places Ben liked to eat at.

He clenched his jaw. Hell no. He wasn’t having any of that. It didn’t matter whatever you were; it wasn’t nice to have a stalker. He followed you, ironically, as you kept walking your path to your new home.

As people kept passing by your side (the night was still pretty young), you kept having the feeling that someone was following you. Normally, you would calm yourself down and tell yourself to stop being paranoid. After what happened with Sam, your nerves were jumping around everywhere. Even the smallest of inconveniences would trigger them. However, it was already dark outside. You could not afford to push your paranoia away. So you put on a collected and calm face, even when in the inside you felt like it was the worst night of your existence.

There was only one block to go to get to your house. It was almost over.

Dean watched you take a turn to the right. He waited for a moment before continuing keeping up with you. He wouldn’t let you slip away from him.

Just as he made the turn into the alley you lured him into, your fist made contact with his face. You grabbed him by his hair, kicked him off balance and immobilized him into the floor.

“What the fuck is your problem, buddy? Huh? What do you want?” How did he not see you waiting for him? How did you catch him off-guard? This was not how it was supposed to happen.

You pulled at his hair harder.

“Answer me, asshole!” He moved his head to the side so he could speak.

“What do I want? What the hell do you want? Fucking stalker ” He twisted in his place and somehow freed one of his arms, before you could notice; he was pushing you off of him.

You both stood, facing each other, guard up. He was blocking the one way out of the alley. Stupid, why did you let that happen?

You looked at his face, his features. At first, it was for filling a police description, but then you realized…

“Dean?” The question left before you could stop it. Oh fuck, you were royally screwed. It wasn’t like you couldn’t kick his ass. You could do it, but you had just voiced that you knew him and that would make your situation potentially escalate into the worst luck possible. The man had just been suspicious of you following him, admitting that you knew who he was, was well, the stupidest thing you could’ve ever done.

“So, you do know me.” He squinted at you.

How could you explain him? Explain that you’ve had visions about him getting into dangerous situations by doing exactly what he was doing at the moment. Every time he followed someone or something just to double check it wasn’t a demon, ghost, ghoul or whatever, you kind of connected with him. As if you were experiencing it yourself.

At first, you thought it was because of Sam’s…Of Sammy being gone. You thought they were spontaneous bursts of magic due to your lack of control of your nerves, it wouldn’t have surprised you. It didn’t occur to you that maybe it was because you had had moved to the same town where Dean Winchester lived.

Suddenly, his accusations of you following him got even more sense. The best explanation was that, while you tried your best to go back to the magical persona you were before and not minding any business in different locations in town, you accidentally had picked Dean’s eye one too many times.

“What are you? And spear me the lies, you wouldn’t know who I am if you weren’t something else.” He started cornering you. You backed away until your back was against the darkest corner of the alley.

You looked up at his angry eyes; they made you grow angry at him. Screw him and his hunter manners. He had no right in doing what he was doing.

“Oh, wouldn’t you like to know.” You pressed your palm into the wall and felt a pull into the dark. You let it drag you in and away from Dean’s surprised and confused face as you disappear in front of him. Your figure less and less visible until there’s only and empty corner in front of him.

Next thing you saw was your silent new living room and a figure sitting at your couch.

“You shadow traveled!” Crowley scolded you. You rolled your eyes and started rubbing at your left elbow.

“It was an emergency.” You took out of your jacket’s pocket your emergency ointment. You shrugged out of the leather jacket and started applying the ointment in your aching arm.

“Oh, please. I’d love to hear what kind of emergency was it for you to use one of the darkest ways of teleporting. You could’ve got lost or worse end up in purgatory or hell! Just what were you thinking, missy?!” He followed you into your kitchen. He sounded like a worried, annoying mom.

“Okay, first of all, purgatory doesn’t exist, at least, for me. It was an invention of the Catholic Church so people will pay to go to heaven. Second of all, you have to really mess it up to end up in hell and third…” You stopped at this. Was it safe to tell him what had being happening? He was your friend, but even you had some trouble in trusting his line of action. He liked to be unpredictable, even to you. It didn’t mean that you couldn’t predict some things of him, but it was better to play it safe.

“Third?” You kept you’re attention on your actions, opening the fridge and trying to decide whether you actually wanted some cold water or if you opened it just to keep your mind off of Dean. You took in a deep breath.

“Third, I thought someone was following me. I didn’t stop to see if it was true or not. I preferred to get home faster than to let something happen to me. Okay? Sorry if you were worried, but… I’m fine.” You closed the fridge. You had finally worked out what you wanted. You wanted Crowley to leave your house, so you could take the liberty to actually submerge into your thoughts.

You took a step forward to wrap him in a warm hug. You could feel his figure tense to the touch.

It always amused you when you hugged him because he always tried to intimidate everyone and to portray himself as the bad guy you didn’t want to defy, ever. For almost everyone, it worked, but for you it was another story. You always tended to analyze people (by nature), you did it subconsciously so it wasn’t like you had the most of control out of it. That’s the reason why you tended to see more than what was presented to you, why people felt vulnerable and trusted you at the same time.

“Thank you for worrying. You’re a good friend.” He pushed you away after you spoke, quickly turning around, already walking towards the entrance door.

He scoffed.

“Whatever, see ya later.” But you knew he was blushing.

After he disappeared, you went to bed, getting out of your clothes and getting under the covers.

Your visions and running into Dean were no coincidence. Fate had plans for you and him and for the first time in a while, you feared what those plans could be.

 Everything was where it was supposed to be. Every single inch of your store had its own personality and radiated happy thoughts. You really loved the direction where it was going.

You had an idea, an earning of spreading magic towards the world. Not dangerous magic, no, just simple spells or even talismans that no one would ever suspect of them; things that could help people with whatever shitty day they were having and make them happy again. Of course, it was also beneficial to you, making the day of people and helping them would also bring joy to you.

What were you’re services? Well, that was a good question. You didn’t hide the fact that your store was a weird one, especially in a small town. But even if people felt discomfort in tarot readings or selling homemade tea or olds books, they still went in for art and photography and design. Getting your passion for art to the fullest would also attract other types of customers. That was the beauty of it.

You were about to close for lunch when you heard the ringing bell. Your head immediately snapped to take a look to your new customers. You flashed them a smile.

“Hi! How may I help you?” The woman walked towards your counter accompanied by, you deduced, her son, who kept scanning the room with his wonder filled eyes.

“Hi! I was wondering if you, by any chance, knew a good photographer? I saw some good photos displayed at the window.”

“Well, I’m the one who took those pictures. What kind of photos you had in mind?” Her eyes sparkled in excitement.

“Oh, I wanted to take some family pictures. It would be me, my son Ben…” At the mentioning of his son, she hugged him and he flashed you a smile.

“And my…” Just then, someone else entered. Your smile faltered for a second, before you composed yourself. You knew who it was even before taking a look.

Dean approached the woman and planted a kiss on her cheek. He then turned to look at you, already tensing and breathing heavily.

“Hi, honey. I was just asking about the photographer, turns out it’s her.” He clenched his jaw and glared at you. Your smile, strangely, grew bigger. Oh, this was going to be fun.

“Hey, uh, would you two go ahead to the restaurant? I want to clear some questions with her.” He turned to look at her. It was all it took. You needn’t be a genius to see that she knew. Maybe she didn’t know all the details, but she knew what Dean was.

“Okay, come on, Ben.” Ben’s attention snapped back toward her mother. He had been looking at a wild cat’s skull.

“Oh, that’s one of the Halloween decorations I was planning on selling. I wonder; how it got there?” The Halloween decorations box was in the storage room, which was locked. You had had the intention of starting displaying them, but after you went for lunch.

You smiled warmly at the thought of the skull’s impatience to be in display.

“It’s so cool.” He picked it up, causing Dean to tense even more.

“Oh, sweetie, no, put it back.” She flashed you an apologetic look, unintentionally. You smiled at her warmly and shook your head. There was no problem at all.

“It’s okay, I don’t mind.”

“Awesome! Mom, can I have it?”

“No.” Dean said, before he could stop himself and making Ben’s smile go away. The woman turned to glare at him before turning her attention back to her son.

“No, not right now. Maybe later, okay? After all, it’s gonna still be here.”

“But what if someone else buys it?” Your heart was filled with cuteness. No matter what Dean’s reaction would be, you just couldn’t resist it. You said: “I could put it on hold for you, if you want it that bad. That way, no one else will buy it.” To that, his smile returned, while nodding and thanking you. He set the skull back from where he took it and followed his mom out of the store.

When they got out of sight, you walked towards the door, locked it and pulled down the curtains. Whatever was going to happen, you didn’t want any potential customers to see.

“So…” You started as you walked to get behind the counter. “How you wanna do this? You want to tie me down and interrogate me? Want to throw at me salt, holy water and silver? You name it.” You shrugged. “I’m down with whichever, so long as after you’re done, you leave me the heck alone.” Dean got conflicted by your relaxed reaction. Even so, he wasted no time in splashing you, out of nowhere, with holy water.

Your face was wet, as well as your shirt. You whipped away the excess of water from your eyes before scoffing.

“You could’ve have warned me! I have a towel in the bathroom! You ruined my clothes, stupid hunter!”

“Whatever.” He said angrily. He yanked you by the wrist and pressed, what could only be, a silver ring to your skin, before noticing that it did nothing. He then proceeded with the salt and iron, getting the same reaction as the other tests.

Meanwhile, you rested your face in your free hand, looking at him, bored.

“Are you done? I’m kind of hungry and I really want to catch a bite.” He freed your hand and practically yelled at you.

“What the fuck are you?” You leaned forward, putting your best chingona face, before answering.

“I’m a witch. But not like the one’s you’ve seen before. And about following you? You seriously think you’re that special? Is your head filled with so much pride and ego that you couldn’t possibly think it could be a coincidence? I mean, I get that you’re a famous hunter and all, but seriously, if I wanted to harm you or your family, I would’ve already done it.” You’re voice sounded familiar. It sounded so familiar, but he didn’t know why.

“So, are we done? I’ll stay away from you and your precious family and you stay away from me? Sound good? Or do you want to burn me alive, just to make sure of it?” You walked towards the storage room and opened it just a smidge, walking in and closing it behind you.

“Hey. Hey!” Dean followed your path and knocked on the door. There wasn’t and answer. He kicked the door open, only to find you weren’t in there.

Crap, you had trapped him.

“Shit.” He kicked the door and walked towards the counter, scanning the room for a way out. His eyes landed on a key set in the counter with a note attached. He took it and opened the note, which read: Help your-self out. When you exit, could you do me the favor to lock the door, pretty please? If you do, then throw the key casually on the street about a block away. Thank you. Hope you enjoy your pizza and that we never see each other again. Bye.

Just what the fuck was your deal?

Days had passed without another sight of Dean. It was a blessing. You kept glaring at a photo you took of Sam. He was painting something in a spare canvas you had and trying to convince you that not everyone could paint. You smiled sadly at the memory, tears rolling down your cheeks.

“This is all your fault.” You scolded the picture.

“If you had told them from the beginning, this would’ve never happened.” He didn’t respond. Of course, it was a picture after all. But you could fix it. You could fix all this mess.

You put away the photo in your wallet and opened your closet door. You stepped in before closing it.

The house looked worn out. And the environment was mostly cars and dirt than plants.

You took in a deep breath and stepped into the porch. You knocked on the door. Moments later, someone opened it.

“May I help you, young lady?”

“Bobby, right?” He squinted at you, suspicious.

“Yes?”

“Hi, I’m Y/N and we need to talk.”

[attemptingthoughtfulness]

...this is worthless, I’m rambling and procrastinating. Sorry ‘bout that.

(minor spoilers for Naruto and Detective Conan as well as major spoilers for Magic Kaito and... Avengers Endgame?)

I’m procrastinating, don’t mind me. And during that time of procrastination I have been watching a show I used to watch when I was like 12 or 13, so it’s been a while. And even though that show has some obvious flaws - flaws I will be writing about in a bit - it find myself liking it. So why?

Magic Kaito is a spin-off show of the much bigger Detective Conan anime, which was actually my first anime ever and one of the few memories I have from age 0-4. I actually went onto the wiki and looked up the episode, which was a lot harder than you can imagine: episode 282 which features (for that show anyway) rather graphic imagery of a bloody corpse and like blood in showers and stuff. I don’t know if I just randomly watched the most traumatizing episodes of animes or - which is far more likely - I just remember them darker thant they were but the Naruto episode right afterwards was the one where Gaara tries to murder Lee at the Chunin exams which is also a rather dark episode. (I know, it doesn’t really matter but that was season 3 episode 58 of the original Naruto series). I bet you could find out the exact day and station that I was watching because there’s virtually no way those two episodes would ever follow each other more than once.

I guess that’s not what it’s really about but Detective Conan was probably one of the core animes I watched when I was younger because it was well known and free online. It was also the one that got me into doing QCs for subtitles (funny story, since I had been a QC for a while and seen the really bad mistakes some translators did, I actually applied for the “job” of a translator, that was mere months before I wrote my Cambridge Certificate exam which I, not to brag, passed with C2, and I had been rejected, which probably fed into my fear of rejection but is also  very funny retrospectively.)

I don’t like Detective Conan that much, it’s a fun episodic detective story that has a very, very thin overarching plot and is probably only ever end when the writers don’t have ideas for crimes anymore. And Magic Kaito suffers from its bigger sibling immensely. In case you don’t know, and I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t, Magic Kaito tells the story of a character that occasionally appears in Detective Conan - a thief who is also a magician (which is quite frankly the best pairing I have ever seen, it’s such a good idea!). Kaito is the son of one of the biggest magicians ever who gets killed in a mysterious accident. One day he finds out that his dad was the thief in the moonlight Kaito Kid and murdered by a mysterious organization - who he now tries to lure out of hiding to protect his father’s legacy and put them in jail.. or something? I mean, there is some revenge fantasy implied, but he’s also like 17 and it’s a children’s anime, so he probably doesn’t want to kill them. Anyway, the way he does it is dressing himself up as Kaito Kid to attract those criminals. And that’s the entire premise of a 24 episodes anime.

Before we get into anything, here some in-universe lore that has been stuck in my mind since 13. My favourite thing about Kid is that his name was also “master thief 1412″, the number being the police file number, but if you write the numbers in a certain way it looks like the word “Kid”, a name given him by Shinichi Kudo’s father (meaning Conan’s father). And both Conan’s and Kaito’s fathers knew each other and were aquantances that respected each other? Like, Conan’s mom went to Kaito’s dad for acting training and stuff which is how his dad figured out that he was Kaito Kid. And when her training ended Conan’s dad gave her a card to give Kaito’s dad with an exclaimationpoint - which was an answer to a card he had previously given him with a question mark. Excuse me if my speech is unclear, I am just nostalgic.

Okay, let’s get started: the series suffers from weak characters and the introduction of too many ideas. That’s it. To get the first thing out of the way: if you make an anime about a spin off character and the main character of the main show keeps showing up that means you don’t trust your spin off to stand on its own feet. I love appearances of in universe characters of other shows, I love the MCU, but imagine if Iron Man kept popping up in Jessica Jones. I mean, he can’t because he’s dead but still. Or Aang keept being part of The Legend of Korra. From 24 episodes, Conan/Shinichi is a major character in 4 of them and is also kinda important in another one. That does not really speak of confidence about your series’ characters which is fair considering it got rebooted. Also, every episode starts with Kaito Kid “opening commentary” the episode before the curtain opens and the actual thing starts - and it also ends with Kid shortly commenting on it and bowing in the end which more often than not features the phrase “I will keep entertaining you if you wish so.”, which is a kinda funny meta commentary of the creator’s being painfully aware of their situation.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, there are really good scenes and funny moments; the one that made me laugh was when Kid hasn’t stolen anything for like three months and since Kaito still goes to high school his friend is kinda disappointed and he thinks: “Who do you think I am? A weekly manga magazine?”, which is already funny but literally a few miliseconds afterwards his friend goes: “Oh, I know why he hasn’t stolen anything for so long! He’s dead!” and he falls off his chair. These jokes wouldn’t be fun on their own but their close proximity to each other makes them work so well. I’m like 70% sure this happened to Gosho Aoyama at some point Over all there is a lot of very good imagery, the magic tricks and heists are fun and often times we have parallel’s, call backs and very well fitting juxtapositions, but over all there’s just a bunch of not-great going on, which I will list now:

1. The Jukebox and the Poker Face: The entire show is also framed by this jukebox Kaito’s dad has left him which has 24 disk and an appendix playing some advice that is tangentially related to the episode. And what more often than not gets repeated is that “he should not forget his poker face”, which, yeah, seems like generally good advice for a magician but... why? It doesn’t serve narrative purpose at all. There is no theme or deeper meaning in the show? The idea of a poker face doesn’t even gets touched on outside of the first episode? Like, otherwise he never breaks his pokerface and there’s like no tension between his real self and the poker face which might as well be a metaphor for Kaito vs. his thief persona. I dunno, am I reading too much into this - why poker face?! Further more, because the jukebox only has 25 audio tracks in total and they play every time Kaito is up to a heist, it kinda feels like he doesn’t do anything in between the episodes? Like, if he listens to that juke box chronologically, which seemed implied, he has only gone to like 25 heists in total which.. is fine for real life statistics but doesn’t really make sense since there is no sense of time in that universe and it just feels like he’s done a lot more?

2. Magic: Yupp, in a universe with a magician reliant on smart tricks and improvisation like a magician on stage there are witches with actual magic. There is actual magic introduced to a world that has previously never had magic before and, believe it or not, magic has no purpose at all. Actually, it does kinda come up in three episodes and they do some really fun stuff the first time with the idea that an illusionist wants to trick and entertain an audience, change their hearts which has different if not more value than actual magic changing the people themselves. Really cool stuff. Would be a shame if the writers wouldn’t know how to go from there and it never comes up again.

3. Super weak as fuck characters outside of Kaito: There are, in total six characters that are not Conan which switch up being the focus of an episode. The witch that practises afor mentioned actual magic is this archetype of a seductress who uses love spells to make boys like her and because her magic doesn’t work on Kaito Kid, she’s like super into him. First, she wants to kill him because she detests his trickery but then she just kinda wants to bang him? And that’s her entire character. Then there is a detective. I didn’t even bother learning his name because he’s the “main challenge” for the first episode he appears and then just kinda stands next to the police officer occasionally to drop observations for exposition or tell Kid something he doesn’t know. I mean, you cannot introduce another high school detective into a universe that whose main character is literally a high school detective. It was as if Jessica Jones kept having Iron Man and another random play boy billionaire with a weird robot suit. There just hast to be a better character than that? Make it a very smart police officer, just anything else. It feels like most of the characters are mostly window dressing and there is just no emotional arc to them whatsoever - they’re treated like most side characters that get shown something by Kaito Kid, have a change of heart and never appear again - with the exception that they are on screen. Constantly. Doing nothing at all.

4.The last two episodes: They’re probably the worst. So, there is this “new magician-thief in town and his name is Kaito Corbeau” and he’s kind of the antithesis of Kaito Kid, dressing in the same suit but in black and probably like a joke on the fact that Kaito Kid is a magician who uses doves which are white and crows are black? I mean, it’s fun but the mirror doesn’t really work that much because the words “Kid” and “Corbeau” don’t mirror each other and Kaito Kid rarely uses doves. But I get the point, A for effort, I guess. Anyway, so. Corbeau who looks suspiciously much like Kaito’s dad and apparently knows something about his death, then challenges Kaito to a duel of thieves also being a magician asks him to solve the mistery of how he will steal some precious gem. By the end of the first episode of the two-parter, Corbeau has stolen the gem and Kaito walks home wondering how he did it. As he comes home the lights of his house are turned on, which is weird since he lives alone because his dad is dead and his mother is always travelling the world. But that unexpected visitor turns out to be his mother and my first reaction was... really? No, they would not be doing such a stupid thing, right? Nah, that’s probably a red herring. No way she’s Corbeau. (Spoiler: she’s Corbeau.) And she asks him “if he really wants to do this? If he doesn’t want to become a magician in Vegas or anything?”, which is a reasonable question from a mother: do you really want to be a thief and hunt some criminals who might as well kill you like your da? But it’s also kind of a stupid one because it is absolutely reasonable that he definitely wants to do that and that there is no grain of doubt in his mind that he does. And that is ultimately the problem of the last two episodes: they’re about testing Kid’s commitment which fails on a bunch of levels. The first one being: there is never a struggle on the side of Kid at all. He never doubts himself, Corbeau isn’t even that big of a challenge, considering he has been regularly challenged by genius high school detectives who seem to be the smartest demographic ever, an actual witch, a serial killer+thief, another differen thief and this shady organization that killed his dad. There is no escalation, no actual struggle against all odds making him question his motivations which - he doesn’t even think for longer than a second about his mother’s questions which is why, when Corbeau tells him around the end that it was all to test his commitment, it could have been substituted for literally anything else.

However, that’s not my real problem with that: Kaito Kid is a necessity, not an identity. There is no need for a commitment towards the figure of Kaito Kid because the moment that criminal organization is caught, there is no need for the mantle of Kaito Kid anymore. This whole idea of commitment of character falls apart because Kid is not a superhero. He’s not taking up a huge and never ending task that is going to take forever - Kaito could very well become a big magician in Vegas afterwards, these things are not mutually exclusive which is why that question kinda backfires and makes his mom look bad because she doubts him for no reason whatsoever? Also, Kaito is literally still in high school and 17, they somehow came up with something less rational than having him dress up as a magician at night and hunting criminals by having him drop out of high school and become a magician in Las fucking Vegas with 17. And I get that it’s the last episode and you wanna end it on a heroic note but that didn’t work at all.

(next morning thoughts: I think I kinda understand the underlying problem of those two episodes now, let me, like the show itself compare it to his bigger brother - Detective Conan. There is no similar episode to test the main character’s strength of mind, but his parents often times wonder and ask him if he really wants to do this considering he nearly died the first time, and that is genuine care and if it wasn’t a better idea to let the police handle it; Conan always answers that he needs to keep doing it. However, these kinds of episodes would actually work with Conan as the main character because for one, his parent’s reasoning is way more sensical and two: he’s inherently human. Yeah, he is super smart and knows a bunch of weird shit that helps him solving crimes, but detectives are humans and they never pretend to be otherwise. I’m not saying magicians aren’t humans, the idea of supernatural things that is beautiful and quite literally casts a spell over us, to be willingly tricked into a world where the impossible is possible is a very human thing. Magicians just aren’t, they’re entertainers and try to exceed our reality, to be exceptional and - to be not human. That’s why the show always has him being cocky and witty, rarely struggling more than a bit with a heist, because he needs to. At this point his poker face has quite literally become his entire character.)

I know, I have been rambling, what I wanted to say is: despite all of this I don’t dislike the show. And in a way it suffers from the same Detective Conan problem of having selfcontained stories but an obligation to connect them to each other, weakening the entire thing. And I don’t know why I like it so much, because I like it more than anything reasonable would justify me to. And this is kinda what I need to find out. I’m very tired now and I have three days to work on my paper and I should go to sleep. If you expected a satisfying conclusion to this whole affair: welcome to Magic Kaito and I’m sorry.

[ofskillandwill]

Too Good to be True

Sparrow opened her eyes, momentarily surprised to see herself within her home behind the demon door. Her mind was a haze, but she was certain she hadn’t visited Oakfield in a long time.

“Wake up little Sparrow!” 

that voice was familiar...too familiar. Sparrow scrunched her brows and buried her head under her pillow to avoid it, to hide away from any painful memories.

“Little Sparrow! It’s time to wake up!” the owner of the voice yanked away her pillows and hit her over the back with them. Looking up Sparrow abruptly met two brown eyes, so much like her own yet darker...and framed by pale pink eyeshadow. Backing up Sparrow blinked rapidly, realizing that Rose was indeed there. Her sister was next to her. 

With a cry of joy and victory she leaped at her elder sister, wrapping Rose in a bear hug and making her shriek as the two of them fell back, sparrow burying her face in the crook of Rose’s neck.

“Geeze, wha’d ya have to do that for?” Rose drawled, yet a chuckle escaped her as she rubbed Sparrows back just as she had back when they were children. Back before...Sparrow suddenly couldn’t remember. “You should be savin’ that for the boys, Logan’s got a surprise for ya.”

Her children? Oh yes, her boys. She got off of Rose, unsurprised to see her wearing a similar outfit to Sparrows own, except instead of black and red she was wearing more neutral brown pants and soft pinks in her corset and coat offset by white and brown. Somehow she knew that this was a daily outfit for her.

Standing she brushed off her nightdress, stretching and wincing as an ache in her back reminded her of the twins she’d birthed only a week ago. Looking to the railings she spotted two wooden cribs lined with white cotton and lace, mobiles with bright and colorful objects turning lazily above them as pairs of small hands reached for them from the tiny confines. When Sparrow approached the cribs she found two tiny beings staring back at her with identical brown eyes, their bald heads covered with scarlet and purple to differentiate them. Little William and little...Rose...yes...she was certain that was her name. 

“In honor of your auntie,” she cooed at the gurgling baby in a flouncy deep scarlet nightdress, picking her up before picking up her brother in shiny purple silk just as flouncy as his sisters. She chuckled as the babies fought for equal rights to resting on her chest, Rose coming to take and hold as William he cried indignantly.

The sisters laughed at the babies before going downstairs, Sparrow using her now empty hand to hold up the end of her nightdress to avoid tripping. Odd, she was sure there was a ladder previously. When she saw Theresa at the table, calmly eating her breakfast as her seven year old, Adam her heart warmed at the sight of him, babbled on about the new swords in the weapons shop out in Oakfield.

“Maybe if I show mom she’ll buy me one. Or maybe Aunt Rose will!”

“Do you not already have a wooden one?” the seer asked, the disapproval barely hidden under the surface of her voice.

“Yeah, wood. Not steel! I’m ready to train and be a hero! The best hero in the world!” He had stood, knocking over his porridge as he did so, which was narrowly saved by Theresa as if she’d seen it happen already. She probably did. Sparrow laughed, the sound odd in her ears yet so welcome. Adam jumped again, turning deep red as he blushed, hiding his face under his long brown hair and kicking his chair sheepishly. “Well...maybe as good as my mama...”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll be a far greater Hero,” she walked up to her boy and wrapped him in a hug, placing his sister between them to keep her both protected but involved all the same. “But no steel until you turn 13, and only if you can meet the other boys in combat with wood.”

Before Adam could answer her a five year old burst through the door, his dark brown locks wild as his eyes and an excitement beaming through his adorable chubby face. Logan her heart cried. My little King.

“Mama!” he yelled. “Come! Come look! Aunt Rose taught me to shoot!” He proudly held up a sling shot and waved it about before running back outside and to the farm, the sound of alarmed chickens following his wake.

Sparrow laughed in joy, “Is this his surprise?” she turned to talk to Rose, only to find her gone. William gone with her. Confused she turned back to the table only to find Adam and Theresa mysteriously gone as well. She’d never heard steps.

Fear welled up within her, rising her hackles enough that she had to fight every instinct within her. Her flight responses screamed that she fight instead, to shock and light fire to the room. But she did have her infant daughter...if she used her magic she might hurt her little one. Blue glowed beneath her as the candles blew out one by one, alerting her that her will lines were back as a constriction in her ribs caused her to look down. She was dressed in black and scarlet again...prepared for a fight...She still had her daughter though, so she took her sword from its sheathe and brandished it before her, clutching the infant protectively as she began to sniffle and clutch at the collar of Sparrows jacket.

Walking pensively to the door Sparrow kept her eyes peeled. “ Logan,” she called out, her anxieties rising as he did not respond. “Logan!” she called again, more alarmed as her little Rose began to cry. Suddenly something ran past her and she jerked to turn around, finding Theresa standing at the other end of the dark room, Logan in front of her and her hands on his shoulders. While the blind woman had no eyes to speak of, Sparrow still recognized the look in her face.

“Did you truly believe this life could be yours little Sparrow?”

“No,” she muttered, taking a step back before her fear turned to anger. Her once beloved nickname now felt like a bullet in her heart. Her pain and fear began to morph though as she saw Theresa’s hand begin to pet Logan’s head. “No!” she began to march forward, only for her feet to sink into the floorboards. “You can’t have him! He is mine! I won’t let you hurt my boy!” she screeched, Rose’s wails growing stronger as Logan reached out for her, calling “mama” as Sparrow felt herself sinking further, her legs refusing to listen to her as she tried to move.

“You think I would harm him? Not while his destiny is unfulfilled.” The easy calm in her voice just angered Sparrow further, both from guilt at raising her voice at her would-be mother and at being spoken to like a child. She couldn’t do this! Children were not to be molded for destiny they were to be children!

“You’ll hurt him!”

“No. I will give him a push.” with that she tapped at Logan’s arm, making the child move to the side as Theresa folded her arms, a familiar scarlet bundle appearing within them. Shock and horror filled Sparrows system as she glanced to her own arm, finding no more than a single long-stemmed rose within it. Sparrow’s eyes widened and she looked back at Theresa as she sunk further into the floorboards, the word “no” barely escaping her mouth as her throat constricted painfully.

The Queen jolted up in bed, almost shocked back to full wakeness by the cold air from the window and the dreaded softness of the mattress. Next to her, her husband stirred, mumbling something about blue silk and dresses and “abhorrent” tattoos. Shaking Sparrow left the bed, finding a shawl on the table near her and pulling it around her shoulders to fight the chill. And perhaps in a feeble attempt to pull herself together. Walking to the window she shut and locked it tightly, the sharp click assuring her that Ther-no, she mustn’t even think the name of that witch, would remain locked out of the palace and away from her children. Breathing in shaky breaths Sparrow leaned her forehead against the glass, trying to calm and assure herself that it was just a dream. A horrific dream.

A small cry sounded behind her, shortly followed by another.

She turned quickly, clutching her shawl closer to herself as she slowly approached a pair of cribs and finding them filled with two near identical babes. only near as they were of different genders, but otherwise they looked the same. Her husband snored louder, turning over in the bed and taking up most of the king sized, plush monstrosity. She sighed heavily before picking up both babes, trying to sooth them back into sleep, guilt washing over her as she feared she’d woken them. But the beating of their hearts and sniffling cries assured her they were real, they were here, and they were hers.

The door to the room opened slightly and Sparrow turned to find a slight man her own age entering, jolting as he spotted her awake. Jasper, she realized as the candle lit his face. She couldn’t help a small relieved grin from gracing her features as the comfort that it was him who’d come. He’d helped her more than she could count with getting used to being royalty.

“My Queen,” he began, bowing quickly yet careful not to drop the candle he’d brought nor loose the nightcap upon his head. “I did not know you were awake. I heard cries and wished to sooth the twins before they woke you. I shall-”

“No,” Sparrow called softly. Perhaps softer than she’d spoken since she was a babe herself. “No, I could use some help, if you don’t mind. I’ve only so many arms to bounce with.”

Jasper gave a polite yet happy seeming smile as he nodded, walking forward and taking her little girl when offered. Sparrow feared William disappearing again if she gave him away. 

“It occurs to me,” Jasper whispered, “that they are a week old yet only Prince William has his name. Is there anything I should call our little Princess until she receives her own?”

“Yes,” Sparrow whispered back as she walked to a rocking chair on the other side of the butler and rocked her son. “Her name is Rose...after my sister.”

Jasper rose a brow at the mention of a sister, a fact that Sparrow had never made public before. 

“I do believe it suits her,” was all he said before he softly cooed at the babe. Sparrow held back a laugh, not wanting to ruin the moment between them. Instead she simply sat and rocked her son while her butler, no...her dear friend...rocked her daughter. Soon enough the fear from her nightmare shrank away, and instead contentedness filled her. Not quite the happiness she wished for, but she was happy she got as much as she did nonetheless.

[heavensawesome-blog]

Bullying Thyself

Bullying Thy’self

By: Heaven Sawesome

Bullying, apparently is a big issue. I cannot say I agree, however I cannot disagree. Never being bullied myself, despite my many distinguishing features and ‘accessories’ people could make fun of. No one ever did, granted I never made fun of others or pointed out their flaws. Over the years I believe I was never bullied because I never allowed anyone to insult me in such a way. Physically nobody would dare, my confidence was too high, it showed. Verbally, is a different story, as long as I can remember I have been verbally, mentally, and emotionally bullied, By whom? Well from myself.

I had tactics in which I disguise my inner thoughts as friends, they accepted my flaws and whenever someone would criticize me. They were there, comforting me. For example: someone could jokingly say that my accomplishment was not the best, if I made Honor roll compared to Honors with distinctions my voices would overrule and say something along the lines of “But you did not fail, you did the best you could”. Keep in mind and note that the voices as I grew up were friendly and comforting when it came to shaping who I was. Anyone would speak kindly to a child with encouraging words. So as I matured naturally the voices in my head did as well. The acceptance of my own flaws was a battle I now had to fight myself on. The war between the voice wanting to remain a child who speaks of only positive things was being bullied by the voice of reality. It was unfair and unjust.

In schools they would talk about where bullying comes from and where it starts. Why someone would bully another is not solely on the fact that their home life is a mess and the bully was abused. This may be true in cases of physical bullies, but I’m not talking about those bullies. I’m talking about the ones we cannot escape, the one who is there with us in the morning and night. The one we cannot hide from, the one we can only hope to distract ourselves from. The voice in our heads, our own personal bullies, you are the bully to yourself.

When I was 12 or 13 I can’t quite remember, I decided enough was enough.

“Your nose is weird, it is too big at the bottom, too fat, your eyes are too dark, your cheeks are too fat, your lips are off. Your ears are soooooo small, your boobs are non existent, your voice is annoying as a dying bird in winter, your hair is a tangled mess, why would you even look in a mirror!” - The things that used to go on in my head, there was many many more hurtful things I would say. Everything was my fault, no matter how good I did I could always do better. Your best is just a new limit to overcome. Push yourself, you’re not broken yet, there is no signs of bleeding, you’re still breathing aren’t you?

This was years of abuse towards myself that no one knew about. I was always cheerful and helpful on the outside because I convinced myself I was no good, I was a bad person. So I always tried my best to be good to everyone, desperately trying to prove to myself that I am a good person, otherwise I wouldn’t be so kind to people, right?

Wrong, you can’t hide from yourself remember, so I knew what I was up to, and that made me feel even worse. The deal is to be good to others for the sake of being good to others not to make yourself feel better, now that’s just selfish!

There was no winning with me.

I remember the first time I asked for help, I was in the bathroom and my mom was doing my hair for something, and she kept nagging me to put my head up and look forward. But how could I look forward? That would mean looking in the mirror, at myself, in the eyes. At the girl who is mean to me every waking, breathing, living moment of the day.

My mother was confused when I closed my eyes, asking if she was pulling my hair, I told her no… I just couldn’t look in the mirror. With concern asking why, the voice came up with the perfect cover “I just look different, I don’t look the same anymore” and Mom, relieved, went on to explain how people constantly change. I tuned her out of course because the voice was getting mad at me for making eye contact with myself, and the mean things just poured out as usual.

Later that day all I know for sure is I got fed up, I went into the bathroom, turned off the lights and shut the door.

*break/side note*

I did not go in there to cut myself, I have never cut myself, why would I dare hurt myself more. There was no way I gave myself that much power! To the girls out there who think they have to cut themselves for that release. Stop, there is a better way to induce those endorphins, don’t make the problem worse, make it better. Put the blades down, stop the tears and try this, because this worked wonders for me.

*Continue story*

I sat on the bathroom floor, against the door, lights off, quiet. The thoughts were roaring, as they knew what I was about to do, trying to convince me it wouldn’t work.

My eyes were closed and I began to find my voice, the one from when I was a child. She was still there, just scared. I had to force her out, and I did. I Jumped up flicked on the light and stared dead in the mirror. I scared the hell out of myself, no idea who this woman was staring at me. She was looking deep into my soul, glaring yet smiling like a mad woman. With no other option, I complimented her. I told her how lovely and perfect I thought her smile was, her teeth were so white. Even her slightly crooked teeth made her look sharp. I looked closer and realized how red and plump her lips were, not big, but curvy. Her eyes sparked, the darkness of them made them look deep, I got lost in them, they even rounded at the perfect spots, connecting to her nose nicely, making it look long and slim. No pigs nose, not a stump nose, not a mouse nose, not a witches nose, no bumps. Her lack of boobs must have been due to the fact that she couldn’t have everything, nobody is THAT perfect. Her cheeks rounded as she smiled big, squinting her eyes.

I now looked away blushing and embarrassed rather than ashamed and disappointed. I looked back at her and never have I seen someone more beautiful. Today I stare at how amazed I am with how far she has come.

Now when I talk to myself it is only positive, even when I mess up, I take it as a lesson and move forward. I have learned to forgive myself, and yes some days I am very hard on myself. Only now I can say I’m sorry and get over it.

It really isn’t that hard, you just have to want to be the bigger voice in your life. Because your inner demons would gladly take over and run wild, you must want to find the inner light and let yourself shine.

Don’t drag yourself down, if you don’t like something about yourself you need to either change it or accept it. There are things you can’t change but by accepting them they tend to disappear.

I can’t change that I love to run but am held back by allergies, asthma, and a heart murmur. I can run 10Km, hike 4 km in a 2hr time period as of 2018 because instead of saying “I can’t cause of this…”

I said “I will keeping in mind that..”

So in explanation, rather than telling myself running was impossible and would never come easy due to the asthma and allergies I should give up and stop. I would say I want to do this and will do the best I can keeping in mind I may not be able to do as well as I want from the asthma.

Then one day I decided it was in my head, and that I could totally keep going, and eventually it became true, I have not used an inhaler for years.

Self care is the key to a happy life, make sure you’re being nice to yourself. Now that I can be happy with who I am, when I do something to benefit someone else I feel proud. Unfortunately from years of abuse it is still difficult to feel genuine and true, but eventually I will get over that. Why? Simple, I want to, and the only one who can stop me from doing anything is myself, and I will be damned if I let her take over again.

Today I am madly in love with myself, I have strangers at my work tell me how amazing I am, people who do not know me fall in love with me too. And for those who don’t I can now offer them more love than anyone, they need it and because I love myself I have more than enough to give. If they don’t want it that is ok too, there is no such thing as too much love.

So love yourself, take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, because in this world all you have is yourself.

And think! Once we all learn to love ourselves it will be that much easier to love everyone else. Love yourself, love your family, love your friends, love your life. Negativity cannot grow where is isn’t welcome. And when negativity tries coming into your life, welcome it with all positivity, believe me when I say that it won’t want to stay.

Negative energy cancels out in the presence of positivity.

[welcometobadblood]

My Reputation Story

Sooo… I know I’m not active on here, but I wanted to speak a little bit on what Reputation means for me. I know that I don’t corner the market on it, but as I have been sitting here crying listening to New Year’s Day thinking about what this album means for me at this specific time in my life, I realized I needed to share my story. I don’t know with what intention, but I would love it if you shared it if it touches you in any way. And also, I needed to write this for my own sake.

I am gay.

I’ve never typed that publicly on the internet before. Ever. Even though I’m out in real life to my loved ones, and now much more drastically (more on that), it shocks me that I’ve never been safe to simply type that simple fact.

Last October, I entered into my first ever relationship. It was toxic, unhealthy, twisted, and I was left cheated on, heart broken, and ultimately confused as to what love is supposed to be about. Which led me into a downward spiral in December, ending in me coming out to my family.

For background, I have been raised in a Christian home and have had to deal with where I find myself at the intersection of my faith and my sexuality. On top of that, I went to a private Christian school from Kindergarten through 12th grade. My family did not take it well. They thought it was wrong, they got angry, of course they expressed their love but it launched me onto the ride of my life. For the last 5 months of my senior year in high school (this January through May), I was then forced to keep my mouth shut, be sure not to speak out, and keep my head down about it all.

That said, people knew. And they talked about me a lot. I remember in May, after prom, I found out that there was a rumor going around about how I was dancing with a boy at prom, which is an utter impossibility. I heard about classmates who were plotting to try to catfish me to yank me out of the closet. It was a witch hunt.

But alas, I survived. I graduated high school relatively unscathed, and expectant for the future away from that whole scene. Oh how ignorant I was then…

About three weeks after graduation, I met a boy. I fell hard, and I fell quick, although at the time I was very cautious due to how broken I still was from my prior relationship. I tried to push him away, I tried to shut it down a couple times, but it was inevitable. And despite it all, said boy refused to give up until we made it official.

I could bore you with the details of the early bit, but essentially I had to hide him from my family as I am still living at home. That blew up in my face, it was messy and ugly, whatever. But I fell more and more and more in love with him. He is everything I could ever dream of and more.

Fast forward, I wanted to go visit him in Baltimore in October where he started going to university this fall, and I decided to go ultimately against my parent’s wishes. It was not pretty. But I went anyway, and I’ve never been more happy in my life than that weekend. Interestingly enough, we have this cute thing where he calls me the “most beautiful” and I call him the “most gorgeous”, so that we don’t argue over who is the most of one of those (we’re so gay I’m sorry).

Well, that weekend Gorgeous dropped. I had loved Look What You Made Me Do and … Ready For It, but listening to Gorgeous for the first time while I had run away to my amazing boyfriend, who I happen to call the “most gorgeous”, while he held me in his arms… I just about lost it. I can’t tell you how that felt, it felt so right and I felt so safe in that moment despite all the other shit. It was like Taylor wrote this song from the thoughts in my head. Oh, did I mention that I was dating the toxic ex when I first saw my current boyfriend? Sound familiar?

So I get home from the weekend, it was heaven and bliss. My family is pissed, but whatever I was on a high. I posted a photo of my boyfriend and I on my private instagram account with only about 40 trusted friends following. Everything was fine and great.

Until the photo leaked at the school I graduated from. Remember? The Christian one?

Now, I was a big deal on campus. I was a leader, I tried to invest in the student body, I was on stage a lot as I led worship in chapel, and all of that was the greatest privilege and joy of my high school career, I genuinely enjoyed serving my peers and creating the best possible experience that I could for them. So it wasn’t like I was some random guy. In addition, my family had been plugged in there for 20 years, with my mom still currently working there.

The photo spread like wildfire among faculty, staff, students, parents, etc. And everything I loved went up into flames.

I was getting comments from people, texts, emails, I knew that people were talking about me, the administration had to step in due to my mom still working there. The “reputation” I had built for myself the past 13 years there was all of a sudden gone, just because I kissed a boy. Everything went straight down the toilet, and it felt like everything had crumbled to pieces around me. I’m still reeling from it all and trying to figure out what to do next and how I can even continue breathing. I’ve been reduced to the worst mental health I’ve ever had, I struggle to keep going day to day, and I honestly just don’t know what to do.

So then drops “Reputation”. And somehow, Taylor wrote my entire heart out. The first time I listened to the album, I felt like someone punched me in the gut. It hurt me a lot. I couldn’t listen to it again for several hours, despite how much I loved it. I felt every word so hard.

From …Ready for It, thinking about how despite my circumstances I know I’m going to be with him. To Don’t Blame Me, in the religious overtones, imagining how I somehow have to explain myself to these close minded people. How I have to give in and allow them to light me up like the witch they would make me out to be.

To Delicate, recognizing that I am in a broken, hurt place, trying to figure out how to start a new relationship and what it means to be loved. Look What You Made Me Do, so perfectly encapsulating my more angry feelings as I feel I should be justified in posting a photo with my boyfriend privately.

Then to the softer tones… Thinking how my boyfriend has loved me at my worst, has made me so happy. Has become the love of my life overnight, despite all the madness and despite circumstances and things that most boys would give up on me for.

King of My Heart, somehow describing this discreet relationships so perfectly. There’s of course Dress, and I’m not going to go into the details of that :-)  Call It What You Want, as I imagine my baby and how he loves me so much.

And finally, New Year’s Day. I want a love like this song, the one that lasts in the worst moments. I have been through the wringer. My reputation is destroyed, I’m trying to figure out how to rise up from the ashes. But I’m so grateful for this album, so specifically writing my story. I am shocked by how much it all feels relevant, and it still hurts to try to process all of my emotions through this album.

This has gone on long enough and I feel as though I could say a million more words about this album. But this is just a small piece of my story that I wanted to share. Because I can.

Thank you @taylorswift. Forever and always.

Xoxo. Austin.

[theatricaldynamite]

C o s e t t e x J o h a n n a AU

For

@elviriel

​

I took our main baes and made an au of them where they end up together. 

Starring Devery Jacobs - Cosette Jasmine Cephas Jones- Johanna Barker Jason Momoa- Jean Valjean Gina Torres- Javert Mads Mikkelsen- Judge Turpin Laverne Cox- Benjamin Barker/Sweeney Todd 

Please remember that this is also a Sweeney Todd AU and Judge Turpin is gross.

Larks

Jean Valjean was once in jail.  He did it to feed his family, but that did not stop him from being put in jail for stealing a loaf of bread.  When he was released, his family had perished.  Starvation, it seemed.  Now that he was out of jail, finding good honest work was even harder which is why he changed his name using forged papers and the candlesticks a priest had given him to show him he could change his fate.

He changed his name, his background and his life and was now a successful business owner in a small town in France.  He maintained a low-profile life style which kept him safe for a while.  His former parole officer, it has seemed, has been trying to find him all these years.  When Javert showed up on his door step, Jean thought he was finished.  However, he didn’t seem to recognize him.  In fact, he wasn’t after him, but one of his workers, a young woman named Fantine.  She has been causing a ruckus regarding her daughter who was in foster care. The family looking after her had put in a formal complaint.

Fantine was desperate to get her daughter back so much that she was ignoring cancer treatments- not that she could afford them anyways. Her daughter, Euphrasie, had been taken away from her as she was so young, alone and sick when she gave birth to her.  Euphrasie, or Cosette as she called her, was her main motivation.  

When Jean Valjean heard her story, he was deeply moved and wanted to protect this young girl in the way he wasn’t able to protect his family.  She didn’t last long enough to hear these words from him, but it was long enough for Javert to recognize who he actually was.  He needed to move fast to get to Cosette

Cosette was raised by a number of different people in a number of different houses with nothing consistent in her life but her misery. She did not care for the different places she was put.  Her latest one was even worse than any house she’s been in.  She felt like Cinderella without a Fairy Godmother.  Tormented by the other foster kids and put to work by the guardians.  She was only eight years old but she knew how hard life can be.  

She had hopes; daydreams about her real mother. A castle on a cloud for just her and her mom.  She dreamt of her mother coming to pick her up and whisking her away to a happy life.

A mother never came, but a father did.

As the first snow fell of the season, Cosette was sent to get groceries in clothes that were too flimsy for the snow. She had ten dollars and a list that would not be covered by it.  It would be bad to steal.  It would be worse for her to not.  

“Excuse me,” she heard a deep voice behind her say. She turned to find a large man in nice clothes looking at her.  She wasn’t allowed to talk to strangers. Panicking, she ran.

“Wait,” he called.  “Is your name Euphrasie? Are you Cosette?”

She stopped so fast she fell to the ground.  He knew her name! He was at her side in an instant making sure she wasn’t hurt.  It’s been a long time since she’s seen kindness.

“I’m a friend of your mother.”  He told her.  He told her what happened to her and how he wanted to take care of her if she wanted. He warned her that it might be dangerous because he wouldn’t be able to legally adopt her.  People would think she was kidnapped and they would have to hide. A policewoman name Javert would always be looking for them.  Cosette considered it.  She wanted a new life, but danger scared her.

“Do it, lark” said the voice of her foster-sister Eponine coming out of her hiding spot calling her by the nickname they gave her. “Leave. Get out of this place and never look back. You’ll be more free out there than you would be here. Go be happy.”

“I thought you didn’t like me,” replied Cosette confused on why she was concerned about her happiness.

“I don’t,” she said. “ I knew you would get to leave one day and I would be stuck here forever.”

“You can come with us if you like as well,” piped up Jean.  “I would never leave someone unhappy behind.”

“You’re not kidnapping two kids in one day, mister!” said Eponine. “Besides, they are my real parents and got another baby on the way.  If I go with you, who’s gonna look after my sister and my little brother on his way. Just go.  I won’t tell anyone.  I saw nothin’.”

Cosette did something that she’s never done before.  She hugged her foster-sister.  It wasn’t a big hug, or a warm hug, or even a good hug but it did make Eponine smile. With that Cosette fled with a stranger into a happier life.

They hid in Paris.  Her new papa had friends who hid them away.  It was small but very comfortable. Cosette never knew such happiness.  How wonderful the world was now.  She had time to grow curious, to learn and to explore. Her papa told her if she smiled anymore than she does that she would burst. They stayed there for many years.  Everyday better than the last.

One day she came home to find that her father was packing them suitcases.  They were close to being found.  Javier was hot on their trail.  They needed to move fast in order to get away.  Jean offered her two option like he had done all of those years ago.  She could either stay here as she was almost of age to be on her own. He would give her everything, including his candlesticks.  The other option was to flee with him.  

Together, they went to London to once again make their life anew.

Cosette loved Paris, but London was nice too. It was much darker there and more rainy, but she made the most of it. She like the walks that they went on together. Skipping ahead and waiting for him to catch up. Offering food or money to the needy as they passed.

They were walking down a street that they never had walked through before as they tried to change up where they walked to.  Turney Lane. She felt eyes watching her. She looked up to find a pretty girl around her age looking at her.  Was she crying?  She fled as soon as they made eye contact. Cosette was no stranger to the look in her eyes.  She had that same look when she lived in her foster homes.

“Do you know who lives in there papa?” she asked, not really expecting him too.  He replied as she thought.

“Johanna,” said homeless woman who came up to her to beg for money.  She had seen this woman before. She believed it was on Fleet Street. Cosette tried to emit her into a hospital but she ran off before she could. Cosette felt that she was younger than what she looked.

“I’m sorry,” replied Jean putting money in her cup.  “What was that?”

“Johanna,” repeated the woman in her raspy voice. “Pretty little Johanna.  The witch locks her up in her high tower and brushes her hair.”

“Rapunzel,” offered Jean. The woman didn’t respond.

“Who is the witch?” asked Cosette.

“Judge Turpin that is, that is, that is the witch,” she replied excitedly. Jean paled at the title of Judge.  “Locks her up and throws away the key. Beats up boys who look at her.  Go in to say nice words comes out with a bloody eye.”  She laughed and ran off. She screamed the name again as she ran off. Johanna.  

Who was Johanna? Why was she locked in a tower?

~~~~~~~~

Sweeney Todd was born Benjamin Barker and a biological parent of Johanna who would have loved to raise her if given the chance. She was raised in New York and was a fantastic hair artist. Before she was fully transitioned, she came to London to apprentice a great barber.  While there, she fell in love with a Londoner with bright blonde hair named Lucy. They got married and soon Johanna came along. For a while, their life was perfect.

Lucy has always been in the same social circle as Judge Turpin and tried to avoid him as best as she could. Whenever they were at parties, she could feel his heated eyes follow her, even at age 13. When the judge found out that Lucy not only married transgendered woman, but a black one at that, he was outraged. He had the US citizen Benjamin Barker deported for marriage fraud and sent back to the states for life. Lucy was devastated. Her love was gone. Her income was depleting and she had a year old baby that should could hardly take care of.  After a horrific meeting with the judge to bring her partner back, she was found no longer fit to take care of her baby.  The judge swiftly came in and took the baby to raised her.

Johanna was raised in a quiet part of London.  One of her first memories was being six and getting her hair dyed blonde. Whenever she asked or complained about having to dye it, all her guardian would tell her is that “he prefered her blonde.”  

She was shut in, homeschool and never ventured outside of London.  She tried to run away, but he somehow always knew her plan.  It was almost like he was always watching her.  She felt like her pet lark.  Caged and unable to sing.  Larks never will, you know, when they are captive.

She was lectured about the evils of men. Warned to keep away from them.  That was fine with her.  She never cared for them much anyway.  

She noticed Cosette while gazing out her window on a gloomy fall day. Everything in her life seemed to be on a gray filter and it was the first sunshine she’s seen in years.  The sunshine practically floated as she danced along the sidewalk and her laugh rang through high and clear. She was walking with a big burly man whom she called Papa.  He seemed to dote on her. By the time the young ball of light noticed her, she was in tears. Making eye contact with her, she fled from the window unable to show her face to someone so pure.

She saw her again the next day. And the day after that. Both of these times it seemed like she was looking for her.  One the third day, she talked to her.

“Hello,” she had greeted her. Shouting from the street. Johanna knew the fates of the men who greeted her, but what of women?  Would the judge hurt her too? He was home today so who knew what he would do. Flustered, Johanna awkwardly waved and once again fled.

A few minutes later, the light was in her room. Her guardian introduced her as Fantine and she was there to teach her French.

“Thank you, Judge Turpin,” said Cosette.  “No off you go, we have work to do!”

No one shushes the judge. Yet she did and she got away with it.  And she was in her bedroom.

“Are you OK?” she whispered urgently as soon as he was out of earshot. “My papa, he’s downstairs, and I are concerned.” Whatever she was expecting it was not that. “I managed to convince that creepo to have me tutor you in French. Oh, my name isn’t Fantine, by the way. It’s Cosette. I didn’t think it was smart to give my name to the guy if I was going to kidnap you.”

“What?” was all Johanna could muster.

“The look in your eyes.  It reminds me of my life from before my papa saved me. So we came here to rescue the princess from her tower, if she wanted. Always need consent and permission to help.”

“I’m…” Johanna started.  Her reflex response was fine.  She was not fine.  She was terrible and trapped. She found herself telling this light everything because she knew she could trust her. Somehow, she knew that she was not a trap from the Judge.  “He watches me. Not just over me but through the walls.  He does it when I sleep or thinks I don’t know he’s there, but I know. I hear him.”

“Hear him doing what?” asked Cosette asked. Johanna shook her head unable to utter the words.  “Oh.”

“I’ll be eighteen soon, but I think..,” Johanna choked out determined not to cry with the Judge downstairs. “I think he’s going to try to marry me.  So, I’ll never be able to leave.”

“I’ll get you out of here. I promise you I will get you out.  If you are OK with the news thinking that you have been kidnapped then we can do it tomorrow if you want.” She was bright, too bright for Johanna.  Colors began to refill her room.  The walls were no longer gray but a deep blue. Her bird even hopped around excited.

“Can I bring my bird? It’s a lark.  I want to free her.” Cosette laughed looking at the bird nodding her head and confirming the lark can come too.  Johanna was getting adventurous now. “And I want to get a short hair cut.  Eventually, grow it out and never dye it blonde again.”

“Sure. I mean, yeah.  Whatever you want,” replied Cosette a little confused. “What would be the best day to break you free?”

“Monday, it’s his longest day! But, why are you doing this? Why are you helping me?”

“My real name is Euphrasie Tholomyès.  I was on the news as a foster care kid who was kidnapped. I wasn’t.  I ran away with a stranger because he knew my mom and it was the best decision of my life.” She grabbed Johanna’s hands. “I don’t know your mom, but I can do that for you, too.” They froze as a voice drifted from the first floor.  It was time for Cosette to leave.

“One more thing before I go and if you don’t like it, I’ll never do it again.” Before Johanna could even respond, she felt Cosette’s lips lightly touch hers. It was over as soon it is began but even more colors in the room started shining. Johanna found herself pulling the girl closer and kissing her as hard as she could feeling the rainbow shine though.  

Cosette left and kept true to her word. On Monday, she was free.  She had finally found her family. Little did she know that as she fled, her biological family returned.  

Sweeney Todd was back in London and she was going to get her revenge.