#if i'm being honest i don't think i could ever get into maps as a character

[necrotic-nephilim]

It's sladin week, what are your thoughts on Maps and Slade? Or Carrie or Stephanie?

hi! i have GREAT news for you in that not only am i doing SladeRobin week BUT: i'm doing a day for both Steph and Carrie!! today's fic (which'll be posted in a couple hours) is a SladeSteph fic and in a couple days, I'll post a SladeCarrie. i love both of these ships a lot, i absolutely adore how Slade could be into either of them for different reasons, and how they could contrast him. Steph is someone who's argumentative and fights back against authority and i think Slade would respect that. i love the idea of Slade wanting to take in Steph because he feels like her potential is being wasted by Bruce ignoring and dismissing her.

and for Carrie, i just love Carrie. something about Carrie's sass, but her still following Bruce like a good soldier slots so well against Slade and how she'd react to him depending on how they met. since Slade isn't in the Dark Knight Returns universe, it's a free sandbox to work him in and see how he'd react. i think their banter could be delightful, and i think they fit well into the whole grumpy x sunshine trope, except the sunshine is a little shit who just decided she was Robin and somehow, that worked out for her. i think it'd give Slade a fun "someone really needs to put this kid in her place" complex about her.

as for Maps, i have to be honest that Maps is too new of a character for me to know much about! the only comics i've read where she appeared significantly are Robin War and Batgirls (2022). so i don't know if i could say much about her and Slade as a ship, just bc she's so outside of my wheelhouse, but i do *definitely* see the vision. she has that sort of "untouched by the Horrors yet" vibe to her and to ship her with someone like Slade, who honestly *is* the Horrors atp, makes for a *very* fun contrast. i could totally see them fitting together and like, corruption kink vibes, i absolutely see your vision anon.

[volturissideslut]

What if the Humans adopt a child just to see what’s so special about humans and why the Cullens like them so much, not knowing how troublesome a 8 year old can be?

𝖁𝖔𝖑𝖙𝖚𝖗𝖎

strap in because this is going to be one hell of a ride (also I'm assuming asker meant volturi adopt a chaotic human child)

Aro, ever the curious one, cannot even fathom why dear Carlisle cares so much for these... creatures

And it's been like over 3000 years since he was human and he can't really remember much about living

It would also help if it would stop making Marcus be such a miserable slab of stone, and perhaps even Caius could do with a new toy

It just seemed like destiny when an 8 year old child strayed from the feeding group one day, too entertained by chasing a fat tabby cat that had jumped the wall to the garden

Whatever parent or guardian that came with seemingly hadn't noticed - not that they were alive long enough too

And, of course, Felix was the one to deliver the child to Master Aro considering he's the only one with a modium of decorum or respect for life in the castle

Any of the other guards would have eaten you on sight to be honest (they wouldn't in the future but you're just some random human child right now, they don't care about you yet)

Aro takes one look at you're little form, sticky fingers; muddy knees; grazed elbows; a leaf in your hair

Perfect

They're keeping you

easy, right?

wrong

Why is a overexcited yet hysterical human child such a lovable inconvenience, you may ask

well

1) none of them can fully keep track of you're emotions,why are children so confusing???

2) they can't fully keep track of your whereabout either

"HOW ON EARTH DID YOU GET OF THE ROOF YOU HEATHEN CHILD" - Caius probably

3) they know nothing, and I mean nothing, about humans. Expect them to ask the secratery for help next time you're sobbing, only to find out you're hungry because they haven't fed you a proper meal in days thinking you'd forage for it yourself

I swear Marcus is the only one who is knowledgeable, despite how small it is

"the child requires sustinence again" - Jane, fed up of this shit

4) they're used to the traumatic stuff of vampire life, you are not, they don't realise that

poor kid is gonna be so traumatised, by the age of 10 killing someone over cereal seems socially acceptable

At least Caius actually has a soft spot for you, otherwise you'd be dead dead by now

Marcus reads you bedtime stories

Aro wants you to grow up appreciating everything he does, there are many 'daddy/daughter dates' where he takes you to see plays, musicals, concerts, or whatever that he deems suitable

Caius pretends to be impressed with your drawings and fakes excitement at whatever lego monstrosity you've made

Alec shows you the world, taking you around on his days off to Scotland, Brazil, India or wherever you randomly point to on a map

Felix let's you use his cloak as a blanket when he's not using it, you like to play with it and use it for dens and pillow forts (it can also be used as one of those massive fabric parachute tent bubble thingys the class played with in nursery/FS1/kindergarten and hid under (you know what I'm talking about))

Demitri let's you win at hide and seek despite his gift letting him know where you are at all times. He is also not above pretending to play to keep you out the way and quiet for a solid five minutes before you come out giggling saying you won again

Jane will capture butterflies and set them free with you because she knows you love them and you also love to chase them

The queen's are always dressing you up like a doll and doing your hair, they basically get a list from the secratery of everything humans need (food, water, socialising etc) and fulfil those needs for you

The secratery is the only one who actually knows what you want and need most times, being human herself. The kings are seriously considering turning her instead of just killing her you your sake

And God forbid anyone touches their precious baby, you've grown on them and they'd burn the world for you in an instant

[luigiblood]

F-Zero 99 - 1 Year Anniversary and the Future

F-Zero 99 is the best thing that happened to Nintendo Switch Online.

I'm not gonna say it any other way, it's been a bit more than a year, and I have 153 hours. This game is top 2 of my most played games (just under Splatoon 3 which has 253 hours).

I was one of the people who was down for this idea since the moment Pyoro teased it and when Nintendo announced it in the September 2023 Nintendo Direct.

This game received 6 content updates since its debut, and most of them are major updates, and as of October 2024, the latest update was 1.5.0, with the addition of the Ace League, making it the first time that Nintendo has ever rereleased Satellaview content in any way, worldwide.

I gotta be honest here, this game keeps on giving, Nintendo Software Technology, the team behind this game, not Arika anymore, is doing a great job.

I'm gonna talk about how I felt about this game, but also a bit of an history of datamining, about the game's future, but spoiler: I don't think this game will die anytime soon.

Happy One Year Anniversary to F-Zero 99!

Oh, and, to everyone saying this game is pissing on F-Zero's legacy as I've definitely seen a few: Go f**k yourself.

Online Quality

To anyone who loves to mock the online quality of Nintendo, you cannot do it to this game, or even any of the games of the "99" series. If you have online problems, the problem is on your side. 100%.

Either your connection's terrible in which case I cannot do anything for you, but most of the problems that I had with the game, it was all solved with either a fix of my internet connection setup (cables, Wi-Fi setup, etc), or by rebooting the Switch system entirely, this is most likely what you need to do the most.

It's not entirely perfect of course, but for the entire year of its existence, I have legit no serious complaints to make to the game.

Datamining The Future

Now... let's go over what we originally datamined at first.

I'm not gonna go over what was clearly experimental content such as a 3D Mute City I map or other things like that.

Extra Modes

We found code and references to 2 modes that have yet to be added to the game since launch:

Arcade Mode It is believed to work similar to old arcade racing games, where you have a limited time, and you go through Time Gates (also datamined) to add more time to your counter to let you either finish the course, or run out of time and rank out.

Survival Mode We found some references to it for the schedule file, but also what is feeling like to be a circle plane. I speculate it to maybe work like a battle royale where the playable place reduces in size, but it's hard to fully understand how it works at this point in time.

I have no idea when these modes would be added, if ever, actually, it's still subject to interpretation.

Extra Courses

We also found references to 4 placeholder course files:

Sulfur Swamp

Volcania

Fungus Swamp

Forest

Three of them uses recolored Mute City I and a custom but clearly placeholder background. But the inclusion of Forest placeholder was definitely an odd one.

It was actually hard to say what it could have been, but Forest is actually the name of a course in BS F-Zero Grand Prix 2 on Satellaview, and more to that, it's the name of a course that we never actually had recovered until the recent BS F-Zero Deluxe hack that used tons of tools in an attempt to reproduce them. We still don't have the original data yet, though. The bounty for that is still up, by the way.

I did definitely get my chances to suspect that maybe, NST was looking into Satellaview tracks, alongside brand new tracks, but maybe that Forest was just also a placeholder name.

But considering the inclusion of Ace League now, I doubt it is a coincidence. Especially when they bothered to have pretty creative names for the others, Forest just sticks out from the rest for being a pretty generic word, an argument that I had already used back then.

But I also noticed something odd, though, on this one I will DEFINITELY give an update if they ever fix this, but the Ace League's best machine ranks are not saved in the stats. This is odd, I don't know if it's a bug, or if it's actually voluntary... because IF it is, then I think the Ace League will change in the future to include the rest of the Satellaview tracks alongside a new Joker (?) League.

UPDATE from October 16th: F-Zero 99 1.5.1 update just released, and they did fix this so I was just doing copium. Not that I didn't expect it, it was a very shaky thing.

In one of the updates, before the inclusion of Secret Tracks, we had seen what was named Death Wind I Remix, which was the Death Wind I + White Land fusion. It's not unlikely that in the future, we will receive what would be called Remix tracks, for possibly entire leagues, but we might need to wait a while before we get those.

Incoming Event?

As NST is definitely aware of datamining attempts, they have been actually pretty busy scrubbing every unused files related to future content especially.

But then they missed a file in the latest 1.5.0 update that added Ace League:

It seems they are looking into doing a Mario VS Donkey Kong Festival Event in the future, including a Mini Mario League, and 4 Star Rivals called Mario, Mini Mario, Donkey Kong and Toad.

There's not much else to it, as it is just text. This text was not localized in most languages from English.

If I had to guess though, I don't rule out that this event might happen for the anniversary of the Mario VS Donkey Kong remake in February 2025. Mario VS Donkey Kong was also the baby of NST, ever since the first of the series on GBA, so it might just be meant to be a fun thing they wanted to do.

I would expect the Mini Mario League to contain either brand new or modified existing tracks to a newer style related to Mario VS Donkey Kong, new music, possibly new machines, and, definitely to me, new emotes to unlock. I expect that to be a limited time event like the others, though what you unlock will definitely stay to your workshop, like previous events, and possibly Training mode if there's indeed new courses to play that they care enough to let us play after the event.

I wouldn't be surprised if we have to collect Mini Marios or something like that, but either way, it seems NST is trying to be a little more daring to F-Zero 99 and possibly follow the footsteps of Tetris 99's themes.

Depending on the situation of the Ace League machine stats, I might have to update this post if I really somehow went too far with my suspicions. (UPDATE: Yes I went too far, they fixed the bug with 1.5.1.)

I do expect more updates related to Ace League for sure, as I do think we'll get Classic versions of the Ace League tracks, and possibly Mirror versions too.

...but oh my god though there's freaking Satellaview tracks in F-Zero 99 omg omg omg we just need the 5 left now

[nondelphic]

thank you so much for 700 followers!! this is so insane to me and i'm so happy people are enjoying my posts.

i know most of you are here for my ""relatable writing posts"" but i also know some of you are interested in who i am, and specifically my writing, so to celebrate hitting 700 followers i thought i'd give you a taste of my writing !! i know i was supposed to tag some ppl but i forgot to write your names down and i can't remember who wanted to be tagged and who didn't 😭😭😭

these are all drafts and i def don't consider myself a great writer, but i think i'm okay at storytelling. regardless, enjoy it for what it is!

this excerpt is from my first completed draft of "the midnight chase." for context, marley is aroace.

-

They sat in silence for a while before Marley shifted towards Lucas. She bit her lip, uncertain of how honest to be. “Lucas?”

He looked at her. “Yeah?”

“You know the party last month? Remember how Elvis kissed me?”

Lucas nodded. Marley averted her gaze, focusing on a path beyond the pond that led to a cliff overlooking the ocean.

“Do you think it’s possible to want that sort of closeness, without wanting it all?” Marley could feel Lucas gaze on her.

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”

Marley sighed and let her gaze drop to her feet. Her shoelaces had come undone.

“I mean, I don’t like Elvis like that, but when he kissed me, I felt… warm inside. Like, it’s not something I crave, but it felt nice regardless.”

Lucas remained silent for a moment. Marley looked up to see his gaze thoughtful as he processed her words. The gentle rustling of leaves and the occasional chirp of a bird were the only sounds filling the silence between them. Marley could feel her heartbeat quicken, wondering if she had said too much, or if Lucas might misunderstand her.

Finally, Lucas sighed softly, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I get what you’re saying, Marley. I think… it’s natural to want closeness, to feel connected to someone, even if it’s not necessarily about romance. It’s human, you know? We all crave that warmth, that feeling of being wanted or cared for, even if it’s just for a moment.”

Marley nodded, relieved that he understood, but still, there was something else she needed to express. She glanced between Lucas and her shoelaces, her senses searching for any sign of judgement or discomfort, but all she saw was patience and a gentle curiosity.

“I guess it just made me question something that’s been nagging me for a long time,” Marley continued, her voice softer now, almost hesitant. “Like, what if I don’t ever want that kind of connection with someone, but I still want to feel close to people? Is that okay?”

Lucas’s expression softened even more, and he reached out, gently placing a hand on Marley’s shoulder. “Marley, there’s no right or wrong way to feel about these things. You’re allowed to want whatever it is you want—or don’t want. It doesn’t make you any less valid or any less… you.”

Marley let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, the tension in her shoulders easing slightly. “Thanks, Lucas. I guess I just needed to hear that.”

and here's another excerpt that shows a bit more of the story...... kinda.

-

As Lucas excused himself to go to the bathroom, Marley looked for Chio. Instead, she ran into Silas.

“Hey,” he said, holding his arm out. “Let’s dance.”

Initially, Marley wanted to say no, but something in Silas’ expression made her do the opposite. She took his arm and he led her to a more secluded part of the dance floor. Marley noticed people staring at them as they walked, not unsurprisingly, considering her and Silas' history.

Silas put a cautious hand on Marley’s back as the song transitioned to a sentimental and slow piano arrangement. 

“You know the map I gave you?” Silas asked. Marley smiled. Yes, the one she and her friends had managed to figure out completely. “Did you solve it?” 

Something in Silas’ expression told Marley he already knew the answer. Did he want help? Had he solved it?

“Yes,” Marley said. Silas nodded, and a smile crept up on his face.

“Me too. Which means… the winner will be determined by who gets to the middle first.”

Marley nodded. “You’re doing it alone?” 

“Yes. I work best alone. I know you’re doing it with your friends.” Something in Marley churned at his answer. It was a typical Silas answer, a simple phrase etched with an edge of passive aggressiveness. Marley had solved it with the help of her friends. He had solved it alone, using only his brains.

“Teamwork is an underappreciated tool,” Marley said, finding herself distancing herself slightly from Silas’ hold on her as they danced.

“Of course. It’s important to be able to work with others. At the end of the day, though, you'll be alone.”

Marley looked into Silas’s eyes, trying to decipher his expression. There was something behind his words, a hint of loneliness perhaps, or maybe a sense of inevitability. She decided to keep the conversation light, not wanting to spoil the mood of the evening.

“Maybe so, but having friends by your side can make a huge difference,” Marley replied, her tone gentle but firm.

Silas nodded, his gaze thoughtful. “I suppose you’re right. It’s just... sometimes it feels like relying on others is a weakness.”

Marley shook her head. “It’s not a weakness, Silas. It’s a strength. Knowing when to ask for help, and knowing you can trust those around you, that’s powerful.”

They continued to dance in silence for a few moments, the slow melody wrapping around them. Marley felt a strange mix of empathy and rivalry towards Silas. She understood his drive and his determination, but she also saw the value in the support system she had with her friends.

As the song came to an end, Silas offered her a small smile. “Thank you for the dance, Marley. And for the perspective.”

Marley returned the smile. “Anytime, Silas. Good luck with the challenge.”

“Good luck to you too,” Silas replied, giving her a polite nod before walking away.

Marley watched him go, feeling a mixture of emotions. She was grateful for her friends and the support they provided, but she also understood the weight Silas carried. She hoped that one day he would realize the value of camaraderie.

Lucas returned from the bathroom, a curious look on his face. “Did I miss something?”

Marley laughed, shaking off the remnants of her conversation with Silas. “Just a dance with Silas. Nothing major.”

Lucas raised an eyebrow but didn’t press further. “Shall we continue dancing?”

“Absolutely,” Marley said, feeling lighter and more determined than ever.

They returned to the dance floor, joining their friends in the celebration. The rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, dancing, and shared moments that Marley knew she would treasure for a long time.

As the night wound down, Marley found herself sitting with Chio and Maya on a bench outside the hall, the cool air in the stone-cladden corridor a refreshing contrast to the warmth of the dance floor.

Maya pulled out her phone from under her dress. Marley watched her. “Where did you keep that?”

“Oh, I have all my dressed sewn to include hidden pockets. I hate not being able to carry stuff.”

Chio rolled her eyes dramatically. “Ah, yes, custom sewn gowns with pockets, what a normal and humble thing!”

“It’s not my fault that default dresses don’t come with pockets already,” Maya countered.

“Calling normal dresses ‘default dresses’ is crazy,” Marley snorted. She looked at Chio’s dress. It was a beautifully simple dress with long, wide arms and a simple fabric belt around the waist, in a bright orange colour, contrasting Chio’s blue hair in a seamlessly effortless way.

“To be fair, my dress is also customised,” Chio sighed, smoothing out her skirt, before smirking. “I took it in two centimetres at the waist.”

The three girls burst out into laughter. Maya looked at her phone.

“What time is it?” Chio asked.

“10:45.”

“We should get ready.” Marley said. The Midnight Chase started at midnight, just as the name suggested. And she was not running down the maze in a long dress. Well, she could, she knew multiple people participating who were going directly from the dance to the maze. But they weren’t in it to win it. Marley and her friends were.

Hopefully, Silas would find that working alone is actually the greatest weakness.

Marley had a gnawing feeling that her stance would be proven right.

HELP i'm so scared y'all are gonna think my writing is trash because LET'S BE FR THIS IS JUST FROM MY FIRST DRAFT!!!! i haven't yet edited these scenes so they're kinda cringe but i wanted to show my main project. i do have different writing styles depending on genre though, and i'm tempted to show some of my comedy writing. it's pretty hilarious, if i may say so myself.

anyway, thank you again for 700 followers. thank you so much. each like, reblog, reply, message, or ask brings me so much happiness. you have no clue how much your interest warms my heart (or maybe you do because you know how social media manipulates our brains and their reward system)

[talkedy]

I was going to write a pretty long post about Epic Mickey: Rebrushed and post it on my main blog, but I didn't think anyone would want to read that, and then it led into me just making this blog. Haha. So I guess if you're here, you do want to read my long rambly thoughts. Here is what I think of the game...

I feel like we're living in a time where creativity is kind of running thin. All we're getting from the industry (and by that I mean Disney because they have a chokehold on everything) is remakes, remasters. Retellings. It's gotten to a point where indie projects feel more creatively sound than projects worked on by huge companies that have ten times the staff. I'm not particularly huge on video game remakes... there's very few remakes I prefer over the originals, and a lot of the times it feels like remakes are just being created to capitalize on the nostalgia people have for it without really enhancing or trying to fix the flaws in the original game. COUGH POKEMON BD/SP COUGH

And in that regard. Epic Mickey (2010) is a very flawed game. It has a lot of objective problems with the platforming mechanics and visuals and such. Mickey is pretty difficult to control... the slow platforming combined with the awkward camera combined with the extremely dark hard-to-navigate visuals made certain parts of the game either very boring or very frustrating. I consider Epic Mickey to be a pretty great game that just suffers from inconsistent difficulty spikes and unclear objectives (which is almost exactly how I feel about Undertale, one of my favorite games ever! so don't take it personally Epic Mickey, heheh)...

Now that Rebrushed is out, I have to say... it turns Epic Mickey from a good but flawed game into a really really excellent game.

Mickey is so fun to control, I'm triple jumping and dashing everywhere and having a blast. I never realized how lackluster the motion controls of the original game were until I played Epic Mickey mapped to a conventional game controller!! He's got a sprint... a more efficient spin attack... a ground pound, a dash... Mickey just feels so much more mobile now, and I never thought such a small change could improve the game so much... the platforming is fun now!! And the visual overhaul really really helps with that, too. Some people were upset that the atmosphere is less dark, but I welcome it with open arms. Who knew that being able to see the the world and the things around you... would make the gameplay easier to understand? Gamechanger...

Besides the platforming overhaul, I really really like how they handled the quest system here. I'm gonna be honest, I rarely did the non-story important quests back in the original game because it was just so hard to keep up with-- and I don't even remember what the original organization system for the quests were. But now they're so incredibly easy to do!! The game lets you know exactly where you need to go to do the quest, what you need to do, and who you need to return to when it's finished. And I ended up doing just about every quest in the game!! Even the boring ones like painting in the plants in each hub world and fixing the Bog Easy bridges. I did end up missing a few quests... a couple of characters showed up as Lost Souls in the final level, which only makes me more determined to do all of the quests in my next Paint route playthrough. And that's crazy!! I hate side quests!!

I just really appreciate how hard the game works to make sure that you're not without an objective to reach or thing to do. The map shows you exactly where you need to head in each level, along with the updated quest journal, along WITH being able to talk to Gus in the overworld (which I'm sure was a thing in the original and I just don't remember it, he seems much easier to locate now..), in general it feels like the game is working with you to ensure that you don't get lost. Maybe it's just doing it to make the game easier on young kids, but is that so bad...?

Quality of life updates... being able to skip the projector stages is pretty convenient. Originally those stages didn't bother me as much as they did other people, but I will say that I did skip them just about every time, heheh. Along with the small changes made to particularly frustrating missions... I noticed a lot of the time-based mini objectives were either eased or removed completely. That's nice! And turned enemies converting other enemies with Paint, now, instead of thinning them out is very nice. Also... the hub worlds staying painted / thinned out!! It really makes the game feel like it's dynamically changing with your choices. I feel like I'm making a difference in this world when I walk into a completely painted Mean Street-- and on the opposite end, it's super eerie to enter a completely empty one on the Thinner route.

On that note... I see people complaining that the morality system of the game wasn't changed, and it makes me scratch my head a little bit. This is a problem people have with the original game-- that the differing routes of the game feel underbaked, and while I can understand that perspective I don't really agree with it.

Epic Mickey is a game that is meant to dynamically change with the choices you make. In that regard, you're not railroaded down any certain path. There is one singular main story, one main objective-- to get the rocket parts and go home-- and that doesn't change depending on what path you take. How you get there is what matters, and the world changes to reflect how you've affected it. The music changes, the townies carry themselves differently and have different dialogue, (the overworld now sticks to your modifications!!) your relationships with characters progress in different ways... and, in that sense, the Thinner Route is not meant to be a giant, bombastic smokeshow of violence and chaos... it's a subtle degradation of the world around you. It's something you're meant to FEEL, even if you can't see the effects immediately. It's a story about decay and neglect. Which is also what the Paint Route is about, but in a different way.

And, even further in that regard, I don't think anything needed to be changed about it. There's no need to change the cutscenes; Oswald's going to give Mickey back his Heart no matter what he does, and I feel like that aspect of his character only enhances the Thinner Route and its consequences. Oswald may hate you if you're a Thinner crazed mouse that goes around destroying and neglecting everything... but he also loves you!! Because, at its core-- Epic Mickey is a story about love. Changing that for the purpose of making a more "satisfying" morality system just kind of goes against what the game is.

...I think that pretty much wraps up all of my important thoughts on the game. It's no doubt the definitive way to play it. Even if I advocate for the grimy, unpolished look of the original game... Epic Mickey: Rebrushed is a clear example of what a good remake IS. It was definitely a game that NEEDED to be remade.

And not just because I love it so much! But that may have influenced my thoughts, too, heheh.

[sl33py-g4m3r]

Back with an update after a long break~~ (thanks anxiety (sarcasm))

Hopefully I've kicked anxiety's ass for the time being and am now in the swing of things~~

I still hate the map tho a little bit. Didn't realize you could press B to center the map, thank you for the tip~~!! idk why or how I didn't find that out myself.

Woman's Ring quest complete~~!! as well as the gryphon talons because I was grinding a good deal of them before. I missed one moss somewhere and need to go find it, annoyingly enough. and slay ortherus.

You can complete some quests multiple times? Is it worth it tho? Gryphon talons are just "get the talons, go to K's tavern to deliver, get 30 macca (?) each time" might be worth if you're grinding at the entrance for whatever reason... idk. what do you do with gryphon talons or fu xi feathers anyway? tried to sell them at B's i think and they didn't appear there.

I wonder if I'm overleveled a little bit? The disaster horde or whatever I fought for the ring chest went down with a zan from flynn, a bufu from centaur, bouncing claw from gryphon, and a grahm slice from lahm derg... it hit me once...

I can fuse now and it's probably a good idea; but I've kind of grown attatched a bit to the demons I have... but they also have all of the skills they'll ever know now anyway I think.... could be wrong. but I think you get the "demon whisper" when they've learned all possible skills? so despite growing attatched to them, time to fuse them into other demons?

Update on skills and roster:

Flynn - lvl 7 - still upping primarily magic, luck, agility - still bufu, zan, critical wave

Centaur - lvl 6 - bufu, needle shot

Gryphon (new!) - lvl 5 - bouncing claw, lunge

Lham Dearg (?) - lvl 5 - grahm slice, critical wave

Fu Xi - lvl 5 - zan, patra

Napaea - lvl 4 - dia, dream needle

Myrmecolion (? new!) - lvl 3 - patra

Mokoi (new!) - lvl 2 - zio

tried to use mokoi's zio on a chagrin, immediate death for mokoi. also tried to recruit a chagrin many times..... nope. it's mokoi all over again~~

hooray~~!!

Progress~~!!

Now what? fuse to see what that's all about, hunt for moss, defeat ortherus and continue on?

I hope that if I take a break from this game for a little bit, that break isn't another entire month. getting in the swing of things and hadn't seen Charon this entire time. Almost died but then thanks to napaea's dia, survived.

(gets comfortable, has an SMT moment)

I put gryphon in front instead of Fu Xi because gryphon nulls zan and is weak to the same thing as Fu Xi anyway... also more HP. so only had flynn be zan during that fight.... Still won but makes me worried I spent too much time being afraid because (idk how to read the map (keyboard smash and yelling for help) and stayed by the door grinding for a good bit. as per my last update on how the play through was going.

Is still fun and the music slaps~~!! glad I got into SMT through the music.

I've done some stuff~~ Break time to decide whether I want to fuse demons, and how. just yolo and see what happens? or have certain ones in mind with certain skills?

Then I'd have to recruit everyone again T_T;;

It's not pokemon, don't get attached to your demons, they're nothing but fusion fodder for stronger demons...

I'm attached anyway.

there begs the question~~! trying a challenge run so to speak? where I only use demons of a certain alignment? might be law cause I'm probably going to the law path anyway if I'm being honest with myself....

finally getting somewhere~~! Finally getting comfortable with navigation~~!! Finally get demon fusion app~~!!

break time~~! hopefully for a lot less long than before~~!!

I wanna punch navarre~~~ casting false aspersions of the poor~~~ feel like he's making fun of myself irl cause I am actually poor irl, lol.

proud of myself for this too~~!! get zan anxiety~~!! let fun things be fun~~!!

(new!) demons are new ones that I've acuired through fusion or negotiation; negotiations at this point because I didn't have access to fusion when I got them.

It baffles me how demon negotiations go sometimes. give stuff, say a thing that makes them not attack you, or try again later, give them stuff, don't like giving macca, and I usually refuse after 2 things. sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't.

like was it gryphon? idk.. someone told me to dig with 3 dig options, i chcose the middle one, got a life stone, then promptly gave it back, and they became my ally? what?

same thing sort of with mokoi with the (I'm waiting for someone) and they're like "I'm the person you were waiting for" becomes ally. ?????

???????????

you bet your sweet macca that I saved after those, baby~~!!

good things can happen in this game???

update cause I dug through my posts and the last update was June 18th. the break wasn't a month long. I thought it was, lol.

[dire-miralis]

Some oddball elder dragons and elder-adjacent monsters i hope will return in Wilds thanks to the grand scale of the game:

Note: I define an oddball as a monster that either hasn't shown up in a long time, and/or is very distinct from the general vibes that more powerful monsters tend to be given.

Nakarkos and Vaal Hazak: Putting these together because they would inhabit the same kind of biome. It looks like Wilds will be taking place in the New World, and i genuinely hope we will see at least an echo of the weirdness of the Rotten Vale return. Many people wanted Nakarkos is World because of the Rotten Vale, but it's clear it couldn't have happened considering the body type limitations the staff dealt with at the time. This clearly isn't the case anymore. The biomes we have seen so far are pretty tame, and beyond any specific monster wishes, i'm hoping that there are some weird maps in store that will allow more specialized new and returning monsters to show up.

Lao Shan Lung, Yama Tsukami, Shen Gaoren, and Kulve Taroth: I think the larger maps are kind of begging for a rework of sieges. I really hope we get to see more single-player friendly siege monster fights. The Seikret's ability for vertical transportation may allow for less clunky use of larger areas in combat with giant monsters.

Dalamadur [DLC]: Honestly i don't have big hopes for that one, as i don't really see how you could make an encounter with it that is in any way distinct from it's 4th gen fight. I suppose it could belong in the above siege category i mentioned, but i don't really see it just, existing anywhere outside of a giant cave, so it would probably still need an arena. Regardless i like it, it's an oddball, and i share everyone's wish to see it back, so, i might as well mention it.

White Fatalis [DLC post release content]: Only an oddball because it hasn't shown up in newgen as of yet. Obviously a popular monster, and i'm still so confused as to why it never showed up in Rise to save it from being the only game in the franchise with Zero forbidden dragons. I'm also going to be brutally honest and say it like it is: There is no point in Fatalis showing up without White Fatalis in any game after MH1. Fatalis in the first game was interesting because it was the only western-looking dragon, which made it stand out and communicated clearly that there was something unnatural about it. As of Kushala existing though, this idea was made obsolete, and White Fatalis was a good way to mitigate Fatalis's loss of visual purpose. Fatalis in World means Nothing outside of "hey look it's the final boss from the first game oooo". If Fatalis comes back in the DLC, which i'm almost sure it will because this is World devs, i want Grandpa back for moral support.

Dire Miralis [DLC post release content] : Considering what they are aiming to do with Wilds is seemingly to step up the franchise yet another step above what World did, what monster could possibly be more impressive as a final post release update for the DLC than the largest black dragon of the series, which hasn't been seen ever since it first appeared in Tri Ultimate ? Very few monsters could hold the title of being as huge of a flex as Dire Miralis would be. Yes, Dalamadur would be more visually grand, and also never appeared (alive) after 4 Ultimate, but Dire Miralis would also be a very elegant monster to bring back lore-wise: The grand architect said to constructs and destroys continents, returning in a game which is building the franchise's formula anew. Beautiful. And yes, i may be biased.

Shara Ishvalda: I hope it will return, i have no elaborate reason for it really. It's cool, it's weird, the spectacle of it is great, and it's from Iceborne so the assets are already there.

Honorable mentions:

Ceadeus: one of my favorite monsters but unfortunately impossible to wish for, as underwater combat will not feature in Wilds. Gaismagorm: It's so lackluster worldbuilding-wise that the devs would pretty much have to rework it basically from the ground up, and while i hope it does return, i really don't get my hopes up. Morudomunto: Disqualified because it's a spinoff monster. Kinda mad that Arkveld is aesthetically a swagless version of it though.

[umbraastaff]

(prev)

There's a lich in the umbrella. Barry's pretty sure of that.

He feels bad for them, whoever they are. But also, it's really not his problem. Having another lich running free would be neutral at best, and at worst would be another thorn in his side. Besides, they're clearly safe in there: Kravitz is apparently unaware of them, or may just be ignoring them in order to better flirt with the elf.

Maybe Barry could cozy up to those three, too, and then Kravitz wouldn't bother him anymore. But that's not really his style, is it? He's not good at making friends, forming connections. People with friends don't turn themselves into liches.

Well, anyway. Kravitz is out of his way for now, and he's going to make the most of it. When the trio breaks out of Refuge's frozen bubble, he's ready. And sure enough, like they always do when they go on one of these little excursions together, they've come out carrying a powerful artifact.

Magnus gasps when Barry reveals himself, then stands in a defensive position. "Guys!" He hisses. "It's one of the Red Robes!"

"Yeah, it's, uh, definitely a robe that is red," Barry says. "Never joined a team about it, though. I did think we were on a team, sort of, back when I helped you with the blood and the map and everything, but I guess that wasn't enough to be worth your heroism."

"...Barry Bluejeans?" Taako realizes, incredulous. Oh, so they do remember that, at least. He always thought his name was pretty distinct.

"Um, we did save your life!" Merle adds, annoyed.

"And then left me to burn!" Sparks crackle across Barry's form, making all three of them step back warily. "Not that you give a shit-- Me and that halfling and hundreds of others who didn't happen to have their souls dragged back from the brink--"

Magnus says, "We-- we didn't want--"

"Enough!" They're all flung back, exposing the cup. That has to be it; he can feel it, and they're all scrambling to get back to it like they know--

He scoops up the artifact, and time freezes around him. That's good-- he gathered from the boys' discussion before they entered the bubble, from snippets between the static, that it might be related to time.

I can help you erase your worst mistakes, comes the voice snaking into his head.

"Oh, good," he says. "I mean, I don't need-- that. Probably. But if you can do that, then it means you can see my past in the first place. That right?"

The scene around him changes-- flashes of his childhood, of his mother. Then forward, to studying in school, to college. Static slowly overtakes more and more of the memory until they're submerged in it, a complete wash of nothing.

"What is this?" he asks, even though he's pretty sure he already knows.

There are large pieces missing from your history. If you can't remember something, can't regret it, then I can't alter it. 

"That's some shitty divination."

Yeah, well, time travel is more of a conjuration-transmutation thing.

"Okay, well, can-- Can you show me anything useful? Can you show me when I became a lich?"

Again, it shows him only what he remembers: through the haze of static, he sits and reads and reads and reads. He talks to other masses of static that are just as likely to be coworkers as they are walls. No hint of where he was. No hint of why.

He really thought this was going to be the answer.

"Fuck!" What kind of idiot rips their soul out and does it so badly their memory gets fucked up? What kind of idiot rips their soul out? He's not a leader, and he's not smart enough to know anything aside from how much he really shouldn't be a leader, so what the hell did Barry Bluejeans ever think he was gonna do with power?

We could undo it, says the cup. Maybe. To be completely honest, I don't know how well I could anchor a timeline in a memory like this, but we could at least try--

"What, and then I get blasted to hell in Phandalin? Look, I'm not a fan of being in this state, but I wasn't exactly ready to die."

It flicks forward through more of his memories. He turns the cup over in his hands, tapping its sides, examining the enchantment.

Well, what about Phandalin? You could avoid dying!

"Right. Uh, it's a pain, but not a big enough pain to, y'know, put a whole diverged timeline on my conscience."

You could save everyone else!

That makes him pause.

"No, I don't think I could," he says finally. "I mean-- I was there. I did try. I'm literally one guy, and that dwarf blew up a town."

It keeps flicking through his memories. "Having trouble?"

The thing is, aside from the death Phandalin sprung on him, Barry Bluejeans has not led a very exciting life. He's done very few things of note, at least that he can remember. His parents both passed away in ways that he'd never have been able to prevent, and nobody else has ever been all that close to him. It's kind of hard to have huge, life-changing regrets when you haven't ever done shit.

The artifact in his hands is starting to shake, he realizes. And glow. That seems bad.

I've had my every offer rejected. How are all of you so stubborn?

The bindings of the artificing are coming loose. Whatever held this thing together, it clearly doesn't react well with getting rejected.

And they're going to take me and destroy me, put me on a shelf, it doesn't matter. I'll never be what I was again. But if nobody uses me, then I can't be what I am now, either! Its voice sounds different in his head, now: less of a "voice echoing from speaking into a cup" and more like a "myriad of voices speaking in chorus."

Barry considers tossing this thing before it explodes in his hands. He's not totally sure if it'll work, though, and he's not really into the idea of leaving it to explode on all these frozen people.

"Well-- hey-- If you can be something else-- Can you be something that actually can do good divination? 'Cause I'd for sure use that."

It's hot in his hands. You would? Yes-- Yes! You can reshape me. You can use me. I can be so much more than just this!

"Great! Great, I'm just gonna get us the hell outta here before you forget how to freeze time, 'cause, uh, I don't want to get into an actual fight with a wizard." And he prepares to teleport them away, back to his warded lair.

So maybe Barry Bluejeans does have some use for power.

[kaddyssammlung]

BPD / C-PTSD / bad relationship dynamics in Sleep Token lyrics - Part 4 (last part)

TW: mental health stuff

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Granite

“Sulfur on your breath Granite in my chest”

I said something about sharing unhealthy coping mechanisms with your partner. It's not good. Alcohol on my breath and the smell of weed on his.

“You won't ever have to talk about it you'll never wanna talk about it”

It makes me think about trust and how much I'm able to really trust someone. What clues does someone give you that makes you trust them?

Last summer when that women started writing me messages because she wanted to get to know me, I thought about how much I should tell her. She wanted to know why I've single for such a long time. So I started my saying that I've struggled with addiction for a long time and that it was really hard to stop this. She said that she liked that I was honest. Well.....we talked more and then at some point I said that I have BPD and that I'm currently going through a rough time and that I feel unable to be in relationship. Right human being but the wrong time? Maybe?! She also opened up about her struggles with panic attacks.

Was it too much? Did I tell her too much?

I feel like when someone has a romantic interest in someone they deserve to know. Right?!

I used to not bring that stuff up and just go on dates and be nice and then end up sleeping with someone. That did not go well either.

Idk....I have no real point...

“Fury too damn late”

Now I'm angry about the relationship that I had with my boyfriend. About the manipulation and the things that he made me do but never wanted. And also the way that I acted. His behaviours were not okay but neither were mine.

“You say you want me, but you know I'm not what you need”

When I think back about the time where I had that boyfriend, he was for sure, not what I needed. I needed help. But I was not ready for it.

“We'd rather be six feet under then be lonely”

That's the reason why I kept ending up with horrible human beings. Because I used to feel exactly like that.

Vessel, I feel you. You deserve better then that and so do I.

I could just say so much about this one line. This is the essence of BPD to me.

But I already said so much...

“before you started getting all aggressive and controlling”

I know. Okay...stop calling me out like that!

Aqua Regia

“Putting down the roses picking up the sword”

It took me so damn long to find a will to live and also to find a willingness to change. You don't get better unless you really, really, really want to and even then it's hard. It was very hard for me.

Vore

“You have become the voice in my head”

All of them are the voice in my head.

My mother screaming at me and throwing things at me.....the gentle brainwashing that was done by the one who sa-ed me.....the eating disorder that still wants me to come back, the warm feeling that alcohol gave me, the stinging pain from SH.....Let's stop this...I'm drifting off....

“My life is torn my bones they bleed”

Through a fractured existence...

Abuse leaves you feeling like this. But so does dissociation......

Ascensionism

“Who made you like this? Who encrypted your dark gospel in body language?”

Idk...they say BPD has something to do with early abandonment so maybe that's the reason?

“Tell me you guessed my future and it mapped onto your fantasy”

That happened with my ex-girlfriend. I was already feeling a bit better and getter better and I could totally see what our relationship would be like.

It did not go well. I was wrong. I learned from it.

Are You Really Okay?

“I cannot fix our wounds this time”

Can you ever?!

Should you be with someone and be there to fix their wounds? I don't expect this anymore. I used to think like that but it did not work out well. I had to “fix” myself first.

The Apparition

“But I know you will disappear”

You make me wish I could disappear...

Vessel...they all do at some point but I guess that's life?!

Why even put yourself out there? Why put myself out there and get hurt again?

Do You Wish That You Loved Me?

“maybe not that you conceal your feelings they just don't exist”

You don't really love...you just hate to be alone!

“chronic feelings of emptiness” ….taken from the DSM 5....

Rain

“I finally think I can say that the vicious cycle was over the moment you smiled at me”

A knowing, a longing, a lost connection to something deeper. Something outside of me....

I recognized that when I started listening to spiritual teachers and slowly let something back into my life.

“A dangerous disposition”

We tend to end up in prison. I can see why that is...that rage...dear God.

My dear humans...I'm going to stop here for now.

Idk when I will pick this back up.

I do see so much more in those lyrics.

“The divine” as he calls it or spirituality as I like to call it, the similarities between Carl Jung's encounters with entities and what it did to him....a lot like Vessel.....depression is also a big topic....

But right now: I'm done.

That was exhausting. BPD got me...I did not see that coming.

[illarian-rambling]

Thanks for the tag @nczaversnick!

Big OC Questionaire

I kinda feel like talking about someone I haven't discussed much, so let's go with Kaulakri, my neurotic little selkie cartographer! Since this is gonna be a long one, I'll put my answers under a cut. I'll also tag @just-emis-blog @mr-orion @the-golden-comet @fortunatetragedy and anyone else who wants in :)

Questions are also under the cut in a block

What is your favorite thing to do to avoid responsibility?

It's rare, but I do get burnt out on occasion. When I was alive, I would go for a swim and enjoy a night on the beach. That's a little harder now, so I practice my flute instead.

If you could choose anyone in the world to be your sibling who would it be?

What was the worst day of your life?

What's so special about a sibling? I suppose I like Pash well enough, though he stresses me out, and Faalgun makes for good company. But why would I hang out with my siblings especially? That's so odd.

What is the most sublime thing you have ever eaten and why?

Maybe it's a little strange for one of the halawemavish, but I love sugar. Most surface foods turn my stomach, so people are always surprised by that. The best, sweetest thing I've ever eaten was this singular Cantran dessert. They called it a marshed mallow.

Well, the last one, I suppose. I never knew what disease killed me, but it was sudden and miserable and spread like a flood through the crew I traveled with. Even in the midst of that agony, watching then all fall around me, it wasn't the idea of death that scared me, but the knowledge that my life would be for nothing. Hopefully, my afterlife will be different....

What’s your worst nightmare?

If a monster asked you your worst nightmare what would you tell it and why?

Like, literally or metaphorically? The worst nightmare I've ever had was when I was ten. I stood with my back to an endless drop while a wave of frothing rats skittered towards me, aiming to sweep me away with them. My 'worst nightmare' in a broader sense is leaving things incomplete. Projects, relationships, all of it. I dread being unable to finish what I've started.

I wouldn't tell it anything. Why does a monster want to know what my worst nightmare is? ....Wait is this the sort of thing I'm supposed to lie for? I suppose I could say my worst nightmare is meringue tarts, but that doesn't seem very convincing.

Would you give away secret information if tortured? Be honest.

Who could you trust most with a secret?

What sort of torture? I don't think waterboarding is all it's cracked up to be, but if you tore out my fingernails or, I don't know, ripped up my maps, I'd probably talk.

Myself, obviously. I have the most stake in keeping my own secrets a secret. But in terms of others, probably Anarac. He hardly talks at all, so I doubt he'd repeat anything I told him.

Uhhhhh.... I'm... I'm lost?

You have been caught somewhere you should be! Quick, what is your excuse?

How good is your sleep schedule?

People always say you can sleep when you're dead, but that's patently false. You don't need to sleep at all when you're dead. I still do most nights, just to keep a semblance of order, but even if I only get a few hours, it doesn't really affect much.

Do you have any siblings? If so, is your relationship good?

Siblings? Oh yes, I forgot you humans are superstitious about blood relations. I suppose I had a few, but I was never especially close with any of the enclave kids. I was a bit more of the... indoor type.

What’s the toughest time you had to endure growing up?

Deciding to leave my enclave. It was all I had ever known, and I was apprenticed to our shaman. I was terrified that I was making the biggest mistake of my life by going to study on the surface. For those first few nights away from home, I thought I was the loneliest person on Illaros.

Again with these blood relation superstitions. As you would think of it, my entire enclave was my family. The person I was closest to was Lishvan, the shaman. He indulged my many, many questions and, I think, took a bit of pity on me for my difficulties socializing. I still remember all the songs he taught me.

What’s your relationship with your family like?

Do you have any hobbies? If so, what ones?

Cartography and natural history are my passions. Yes, they're also my job, but nothing brings me more joy than cataloging a new island species or watching a map slowly spring from a blank page. Apart from that, I've always enjoyed music and storytelling. The crews I sailed with always compliment my flute playing as quite good.

No. I did in life, but now that I think about it, I've never had a dream while dead. I suppose they aren't for us.

Do you dream often?

What do you dream about?

Have you ever been in love?

When I was alive, my dreams were mostly nonsense. Usually, they took place on ships, which makes sense considering where I spent much of my time. Some were anxious, others were happy, but overall, most of my dreams were about doing something that made no sense upon waking.

Who's to say? I... I'm not good at being close to people. My work has always taken priority and I can be distant even when I'm not on assignment. The closest I ever came was a three month long fling with a sea captain whose ship I had chartered with a sizable grant. She was the perfect partner - everything I could've asked for. Attentive, not overly touchy, and a superb conversationalist. I think she really liked me and I... I might’ve loved her. Of course, I only realized that when I'd finished my mapping trip and by that time, her ship had long sailed over the horizon.

Rats. You wouldn't think it's possible for someone to hate an animal to such a degree, but believe me, I fucking do. They're disgusting creatures who get shit everywhere, eat rations, and eat my damn maps! Not only do they do all of that, but they carry disease everywhere they go. Considering how I died, you shouldn't be surprised when I tell you that I'll kill any rat I see.

What is your least favorite thing in the world?

What is your pet peeve?

Poor organization rubs me the wrong way no matter the scale. This world runs on order and efficiency, and there's no reason to make everything more difficult for everyone else just because you can't be bothered to take notes.

Would you consider yourself different?

How far would you go to save a loved one?

I.... Oh, what a question. I've always been... apart from my peers. Too serious, too obedient, too off in my own world. I didn't have many friends as a kid for all of those reasons. No one outright bullied me, but even I'm not oblivious enough to miss hands going up to cover whispers every time I'm around. It was better when I went to school. The people there were more like-minded. But by then though, I'd learned to hold myself apart from others. It's not as if I crave company. I'm perfectly happy to keep to myself and my maps. It's just... sometimes I wish I could find someone with passions that matched my own. We could share a journal and know that every annotation actually means I love you.

Murder. Anything below that is fair game, but I think one murder would be my limit. I'd find another way.

I don't really have a worst enemy. Should I? Could it be rats? I think I could team up with rats if my crew was on the line, though I might wear gloves and a mask the whole time. Just because I'm dead doesn't mean I shouldn't be concerned with hygiene.

Would you team up with your worst enemy if it was your only option?

What is the worst insult you can give?

I don't really like giving insults - I'd rather just walk away. There was one time though, that I told Nyda she'd set Illari progress back by centuries due to her own idiocy, and that countless sailors had probably died because she'd been too busy chasing pointless glory to write down her damn equations. Oh, and also that she was a fool for trying so hard to be a warrior when it was clear she would never have the skill to fight off more than a frog. Maybe I went a little overboard there, now that I think about it.

What is the nicest thing someone could say to you?

Are you a jealous person?

Oh spirits, I'm not sure. I think if someone said my maps had saved them from being lost at sea, I'd just lay down and cry.

I don't know, what constitutes jealous? I'm going to go with a tentative no.

Have you ever committed a crime?

Why would I tell you that? ...Well, I suppose I'm dead now, so it won't make much of a difference. I, uh, would loot money from shipwrecks sometimes, to pay for my expeditions. Technically, scavanged goods are supposed to go to the company the ship belonged to, but they won't miss it. I hope.

Are you neat or messy?

Neat. Messy things stress me out.

How do you feel about crying? Let it out or hold it in?

Crying is a very important emotional release and you should never be ashamed of it. Not for me though - I'm ashamed.

Who do you live for? Why?

First off, I'm not alive. Secondly, when I was alive, I lived to finish my maps and chart every island in Janaz. Part of that was to help other people sail more safely, yes, but part was because I simply had to know what was out there. So... I guess I don't know.

Who has betrayed you most?

My own health. Right when I was nearly finished with my work, my own damn body gave out on me. Now it and my maps are rotting on a deserted island somewhere, never to be seen by a living soul again.

What style of accessories do you wear? Is it willingly?

I don't like the feel of jewelry. Anything on my hands at all makes me uncomfortable, really. I suppose I still have the little belt bag I died with. That's a pretty handy accessory.

What is your favorite thing to do to avoid responsibility?If you could choose anyone in the world to be your sibling who would it be?What is the most sublime thing you have ever eaten and why?What was the worst day of your life?What’s your worst nightmare?If a monster asked you your worst nightmare what would you tell it and why?Would you give away secret information if tortured? Be honest.Who could you trust most with a secret?You have been caught somewhere you should be! Quick, what is your excuse?How good is your sleep schedule?Do you have any siblings? If so, is your relationship good?What’s the toughest time you had to endure growing up?What’s your relationship with your family like?Do you have any hobbies? If so, what ones?Do you dream often? What do you dream about?Have you ever been in love?What is your least favorite thing in the world?What is your pet peeve?Would you consider yourself different?How far would you go to save a loved one?Would you team up with your worst enemy if it was your only option?What is the worst insult you can give?What is the nicest thing someone could say to you?Are you a jealous person?Have you ever committed a crime?Are you neat or messy?How do you feel about crying? Let it out or hold it in?Who do you live for? Why?Who has betrayed you most?What style of accessories do you wear? Is it willingly?

[pine-niidles]

2024 July Monthly Update - Artfight

Another July gone by, another Artfight draws to a close. This month's update post will be primary looking at what I've made for Artfight, but first some personal updates:

I mentioned in my last post I was dealing with wrist pain but it was getting better. It got worse. The last few weeks of July I spent not moving my hands as much as I possibly could because both hands were feeling so bad. Luckily I managed to figure out the cause (I bought myself a wheeled bag to take stain off my back when grocery shopping, turns out wheeled bag + cobblestone streets = wrist destroying vibrations) and once I eliminated it my wrists started actually healing. They're feeling much better now, not fully healed but well on the way :) I'm just glad art wasn't the cause. With any luck this'll be the last monthly update this year with a 'personal circumstances' blurb at the start and I can get fully back to just making and talking about art ✨

Artfight

This year was my 8th year participating, which is kind of wild to think about. My first year was Sun vs Moon, on team moon and I drew 34 total art pieces. I don't think I've ever beat the number but I certainly got close this year having drawn 30 attacks!

I didn't have a specific plan going into artfight this year, I usually don't other than maybe a list of people I'd like to draw for. I treat artfight as a super low pressure way to experiment and draw fun designs. Not every piece comes out exactly how I want it but that's part of the fun and every year at least one artfight drawing makes it's way to my fav art that year. 

At the end of June I'd just made a template for doing these chibi icons and I was having so much fun with them I started off artfight doing a bunch of them for attacks:

I think they turned out super cute but they look a little awkward side by side due to the different dimensions of each one. I've yet to find a good way to display batches of them 😔

The first bigger drawing I did was of a character I found in my bookmarks and I love how it turned out:

It was the perfect piece to break the last shackles of my artblock away and drawing it felt smooth as butter. I didn't really do anything similar the rest of the month but there's several points on how I lined and colored this one that I'm keeping in mind to experiment more with in the future. 

After the first piece I was feeling in a more environmental mood and freehanded these two attacks featuring characters in funky landscapes.

My wrists were still feeling pretty iffy at this point so the lines for both of these were a very loose first pass over a rough sketch but to be honest I don't think anyone would notice unless I pointed it out. 

I really thought I'd do more in this style but 🤷‍♂️ it ended up not happening. Maybe I'll do something with some ocs soon

The last three attacks I got out before my wrists got too bad to draw I did all in the same day

These two characters were exactly my type & I love to draw chibis on some kind of environmental base or prop so I wanted to do something with that this artfight as well. I think they turned out pretty cute!

Another one with a base, this time more like a character standee that I love to give dnd characters. Physical character models moving around on a map is one of my favorite tactile experiences of tabletop games.

The last one I did before I had to take a couple week pause - I wanted to experiment around with linework specifically and while there's a lot I like about this drawing there's several things I had to rush or simplify because of my wrists and overall it didn't end up being the strongest piece. Ah well, that's how it sometimes.

The day after I did these I went grochery shopping again and then my wrists really gave out. I didn't draw anything for artfight from the 12th until the 29th when my hands were finally starting to feel good enough to try and do just a few last drawings before the end.

I started off simple with some blocky chibis with saturated lineart. I'd played with colorful lines in the past but I never ended up liking because having all the lineart be one bright color always felt too much and too distracting. However, earlier this month I saw this gorgeous attack by ebelcities which made my realize the extremely pointless arbitrary restriction I'd been putting on myself: you don't need to have ALL the lineart be a bright saturated color, of course you don't! How trivial! And yet this was a huge breakthrough. I have to thank ebelcities for having such beautiful art 🥰 Seeing her work is always sooo inspiring. 

I still didn't want to push my hands too much so my next attack was done mostly using the lasso tool, with a few textures added on top. This attack received the least attention on social media out of all of them but personally I'm pretty proud of it 🤍

In the last two days my hands were feeling MUCH better and I took advantage of that to try and reach my initial goal I had at the start of the month - 30 attacks to fill up a whole page on my all attacks section with attacks from this year. 

​I had 7 left to do - and I did it!

I wanted to keep them simple both of the sake of my hands (drinking game for this post - take a shot anytime I mentioned my wrists) and to actually finish 7 drawings in 2 days. But I also didn't want to just give people rough sketches, especially since most of these were revenges for some really lovely art I'd gotten. So I came up with the idea of A) a border template and B) using tones!

I've been really into dot tones recently but I've not really been using them as is the traditional method - it was a bit of a challenge doing them in these! Picking tones, getting a range of values, matching textures, getting the size of the dots right... so many decisions to make. I'll have to keep experimenting with them, maybe for some actual comics in the future :)

And that's it for this year's artfight. We'll be hearing the results soon but even before hearing them I think seafoam has probably lost haha, we've been lagging behind all month and I had a feeling this would happen when I saw the team numbers but I still love seafoam regardless <3 I'm looking forward to seeing what the teams will be next year!

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Who's going to bring up Geto first? I'm really curious about Gojo opening up to her about this in particular.

In another note, will Gojo ever know about Nanamin kissing our girl? And if so... Is it going to be a funny anecdote or is it going to bring a lil bit of drama/jealousy?

OOF you're literally comin' out the gates SWINGING with these two HEAVY HITTERS.

OKAY. I'm here for it lol I'm putting the answers under a cut because I apparently am incapable of actual short answers 🙃

1.) Who brings up Geto first?

Short answer: Gojo

With Geto, it's going to be... complicated lol.

In Rinko's eyes, there will never, ever be anyone who can replace Geto for Gojo. She sees herself in a solid second place forever. And honestly? She's okay with that.

It's going to be multiple conversations over time. Gojo is going to bring it up because she doesn't ever want to push him to talk about something she knows is so painful for him. But because Geto was the only other person he ever trusted completely, saw as a moral compass even, that kind of wound is going to take a lot of conversations and it's going to complicate things so much for him as he tries to navigate life with her by his side.

2.) Will Gojo ever know about Nanami kissing Rinko and if so, how will it go?

Short answer: He's going to find out. And it's really not going to go well.

Nanami is a different beast when it comes to jealousy for their relationship. He will become one of her very best friends, on an equal level with how close she is with Shoko. He is like a brother to her and he sees her as a complete dumbass older sister. But that's how Rinko and Nanami see it.

When it comes to jealousy, neither Rinko or Gojo actually gets jealous most of the time.

They joke about it, Rinko riles him up by teasing him about someone being better at making her cum. But he's very confident that he's the best she's ever had.

But, remember that there's one thing Rinko has already established for herself and Gojo knows it well: She'll never date a non-sorcerer because of how complicated that would be. She'll never commit to someone she can't be honest with.

And that's the reason Nanami is, in Gojo's eyes, a potential threat. Because he's a Jujutsu Sorcerer, he knows Rinko, and Gojo also knows that Nanami is likely interested in settling down one day and could offer that to her and he'll eventually start to fear that as a real possibility.

We just saw what happens when he gets a lil jealous of her going on a date in Hollow Echoes and it's going to go even worse than that because she isn't going to take shit from him over it.

I've actually got it mapped out, SO, I'll give you a lil preview of him being upset she had dinner with Nanami long after they already realized it would never work:

“I don’t tell you every time I have dinner with Shoko, either. I don’t have to tell you anything. And I fucking knew you’d get into a pissing match with him. I’ll have you know, I went on a few actual dates with him years ago-” “Did you fuck him?” he asked, his eyes darkening now. “What if I had?” she challenged, for once not doing it to push his buttons. “You really do have some fucking nerve to try to think you have any say in who else I fuck." Glaring at his hazy eyes, she continued. "As for dinner with Nanami this time, we grab dinner occasionally because we’re friends and he enjoys my company - as he should because I’m a goddamn fucking delight - and he missed the last train so he slept on my couch. I don't even know why you'd care-” “Because you’re mine,” he hissed, his eyes clearing for just a moment as he spoke. “Because I-” “I’m no more yours than you are mine,” she snapped, poking him in the chest. “It’s one thing to say that shit while we’re having sex-”

And yeah, that's just a tiny bit of this conversation 🙃🙃 I'll let you guess when this'll be lol

Thank you for your questions!!! Hopefully my rambling makes at least a bit of sense.

Read Another Level on AO3 :)

[malhare-archive]

٩( ^ᗜ^)و ´- If you're comfortable sharing I'd love to hear more about Rowan's relationships with the DLC characters (The Think Tank, Dr. Mobius, Dog/God, Dean Domino etc.)!

OF COURSE I DON'T MIND!! I love rambling about Rowan and fnv so thank you for asking! o(〃＾▽＾〃)o

I won't get into Honest Hearts as I've already talked about Rowan and Joshua's relationship and I can already tell this answer is going to be long ^_^;

Old World Blues: Rowan did NOT like *any* of the Think Tank at first but they grudgingly began to grow on him. He genuinely likes Dr. Mobius and checks in on him often. Rowan likes Dr. 8 and Dr. Dala, he finds Dr. O annoying but harmless, Dr. Klein also annoying but less harmless (he keeps a close eye on him), and he's genuinely weirded out by Dr. Borous and typically avoids him. Dr. Borous is the only one he cannot even begin to get his head around with regard to his neuroses, and he's also weirded out by his obsession with experimenting on animals

Dead Money: While I like Dean Domino as a character, him and Rowan immediately butt heads. Rowan cannot stand (what he perceives to be) misplaced arrogance and stubborness/unwillingness to handle even slight push back. He gets along better with Christine Royce but they still tend to keep eachother at a distance, their relationship being one of mostly necessity and mutual respect. Rowan latches hard onto Dog/God as his lifeline - The entire experience of Dead Money really rattles his confidence and puts true fear into him, so he's initially drawn to them due to wanting that bulky Nightkin strength on his side. God and Rowan end up building a mutual trust and grow surprisingly close, so much so that they keep in touch even after escaping the Sierra Madre

Lonesome Road lore under the cut because it accidentally ended up so long because I'm insane about Rowan and Ulysses' relationship 😭

Rowan and Ulysses met when Ulysses first scouted the West for the Legion. Rowan was already working as a drug runner and courier at the time so he offered to show him around the Mojave. The two spent a lot of time together and eventually became romantically involved. When Ulysses saw the budding community forged by Rowan's route he decided to fully defect from the Legion to focus on building their new home there... Then the NCR came. Following the massacre at Bitter Springs Rowan could not stand the NCR presence. Ulysses urged him not to risk his life and destroy what they had built, but Rowan just couldn't let go - He waited until he knew Ulysses would be away before delivering the payload that he knew would wipe the place off the map, given to him by Vulpes Inculta. Ulysses was horrified and enraged by what Rowan had done but couldn't bring himself to hurt him so the two went their separate ways. When Benny put two bullets in Rowan's head it gave him amnesia, making some of his memories murky or outright forgotten - By the time Rowan makes his way to The Divide to follow Ulysses' call home, he had completely forgotten him. This took the sails out of Ulysses' rage completely, leaving him only hollow. With time Rowan recovers some memories and Ulysses fills in the gaps, but sometimes he wishes he didn't remember what he had and so callously threw away. It's his biggest regret, and a part of him will love Ulysses forever but there's just too much history and pain between them for things to ever be the same

[zwei-rhunen]

hi game, what the heck? seriously, what the heck

venting because i'd like to roughly shake the shoulders of whichever game designer is responsible for this >:( i also know with the time i spent venting, i could have already gritted my teeth and just gotten to where-ever it is i'm trying to get to but it's 1. a vent and 2. not the first time this has happened and doing this again has really annoyed me now lol

so like, i need to get from Ala Ghiri to Coldhearth.

"look," you say. "there is a convenient passage right there!"

no, there's not. :)

no, there is not. :))

i google to see if I am just blind, because all i see around me are hills that are too steep for me to climb (I can't fly yet, and this quest is to unlock one of the aether currents.)

the wiki says:

"According to legend, this wind-carved corridor was used by the Destroyer as a sheath for one of his blades. For the local folk, the passage serves as a convenient shortcut when traveling from Coldhearth to Ala Ghiri."

FROM Coldhearth TO Ala Ghiri.

So this is one-way only - which makes sense, looking at the map.

but like.

why though.

Cus right now, it seems like the only way for me as a player to get there is AAAALL THE WAY AROUND? run a SUPER out-of-the-way path that's literally half the map, to get to a point that's within spitting distance?

"it's so you can explore map on foot and take in the sights-"

i've already done that. I did that during the MSQ. there is no need to do it again. I saw all the hills and rocks and Garlean wrecks. They were cool. Please let me continue with the storytelling.

2. "it's for world building purposes-"

Poor excuse- you can have world building without being a detriment to the gameplay to the IRL player.

You dont even have to change anything!! just add a little sparkly spot next to a rock face (JUST like Matoya's Cave) that the player can interact with (after they reach a point in the MSQ, just like earlier in StB when you first arrive at Rhalgr's Reach) that says something like, "you find an illusory entrance that leads into a tunnel/find a secret ladder leading onto the hills, it appears to have been made by the Resistance for ease of travel into the other towns. Cross over?"

3. "chocobo porter?"

none exists in that town :( would be a GREAT idea to implement though!!!!!!!!

(yeah like HEY! porters DO exist, there should be more of them! call them resistance fighter porters or something, if having a permanent one is lore-breaking!! (before freeing it from Garleans - "this seems to be a chocobo porter but the trainer and his bird appear to be away." and then after getting past that point in the MSQ - "hi we're back etc etc port you to places you've been before etc etc")

(Edit: actually this holds great potential for an extra flavor in worldbuilding too. It could be a Garlean-operated porter, and if you try to use it before an MSQ point, it could be used as another narratory glimpse into how the typical footsoldier treats the common civilian. "...why would YOU need to travel? Do you have a permit of leave? Then get back to work, before I report you to your superior."

Or "Authorized Military personnel only, sorry."

Or "stay back! don't even THINK about stealing a bird, savage."

Or "hm? Commoners arent allowed to use the porters... ...it's even worse out there, you know."

OR EVEN for inserting some fun and mild tongue-in-cheek subterfuge: "psst, hey, you're with the Resistance, arent you? Me as well. activity around here has really ramped up, so no one will even notice you on one of our birds ... Our chocobos can etc etc Port you where you've been etc etc"

4. "friend/ask for help/it's an mmo?"

no one is around (else i probably would've /emoted at someone and asked them to do me a quick favor and toss me up there if they had the means), friends are offline b/c i'm a night owl, i could (and have) ask for help in novice network but if it's midnight, i'll be honest - not looking to socialize at that time of the night, esp to ping anyone for something so inconsequential. like sometimes i just want to get my quests done and it's annoying to have to ask someone to drop what they're doing so they can travel all the way to me just to... pick me up and plop me down on a rock-face 5 inches away lol.

5. "just click on the green arrow on the right hand side on the map, that leads to the adjoining area, and if there's an aetheryte nearby you can just teleport to that location and run back into this map, which is still you travelling on foot but it dramatically shortens your travel."

I usually did this for places in Heavensward and I'm sad to say that this doesn't work here, bc that's a location (Porta Praetoria) I haven't unlocked yet. :') WHICH SUCKS BC THE AETHERYTE IS RIGHT THEREEEEE

I COULD JUST-

AND THEN JUST-

but noooo. i gotta run all the way around LIKE-

?????????????????

i really enjoy this game. and i want to love this game, but pleaseeee

its so tiring and irritating watching my poor little meow-meow taking the most dumbass ways around to get to places that shouldn't be an issue this late into an expansion LMFAO - like, i am 6 quests away from end of Stormblood MSQ.

I promise squenix, adding some conveniences won't break the lore/world-building/diminish the value of character exploration.

pleaseeeee.

[biracy]

too scared to post this on my own tumblr for fear of Grievous Misinterpretation + you’re one of my smartest mutuals and i want to run it by a smart person first. for context your reblog about thought crime reminded me of this so i’m not just dumping this on you out of the blue! although this isn’t directly related.

anyway - after some observation of these communities and research into these issues, i have come to the conclusion that quite a lot of people who identify as zoophiles and/or MAPs are not actually those things, but people who just have intense and distressing intrusive thoughts. particularly the younger ones. i rarely saw any of them express anything except distress at these thoughts, but they have been pulled into those communities one way or another - someone grooming them into it, or their previous friend groups reacting badly to them confessing their intrusive thoughts and chasing them out, etc. ofc this would happen, because an upset person seeks support, it’s just horribly tragic what they can be manipulated into or accidentally become involved with while seeking that support.

obviously i have done no formal study and have no definite numbers for exactly how many people there could be in this situation. but given the level of distress i would see person after person after person express when discussing their “desires” and “urges”, i think the number must be pretty high. of course, we know intrusive thoughts can be horrific things you as a person want nothing to do with, and that thought crime isn’t real - but it makes sense, i think?

i wish people understood intrusive thoughts better, and i wish people didn’t behave the way that they do about fetishes. not to say that i don’t think it’s morally okay to be a zoo or a MAP, of course! but i feel that the negative reaction to many fetishes + the negative reaction to many intrusive thoughts = people do not seek the support they need, or if they do seek it they aren’t getting the help they need & are punished instead.

i’m rambling. i hope this makes sense. i’m sorry for putting this in your inbox but i’m friends with too many people who will kneejerk accuse me of being these things because i have dared to view them sympathetically :’/ but i genuinely wanted to hear another person’s thoughts on this.

Oh I definitely see where ur coming from yeah! I think this comes down to a variety of different issues let me kinda break down my thoughts:

I DO think a lot of people who identify online as "MAPs" or "zoos" or whatever are people with intrusive thoughts, OCD, DID, etc.. I think a lottttt of the "communities"/"support groups"/etc. formed around these things are mostly people with intrusive thoughts that they don't know to identify as intrusive thoughts. If I'm being honest, both networks seem to end up saying "just because you have these thoughts doesn't mean you'd ever act on them and they don't make you a bad person", which is good, but I do think someone having their intrusive thoughts framed as "this is just the way that you are, you were born to have these Urges" can end up being pretty detrimental in time.

I think it's important to note that I'm really strongly against the what I'll call "paraphilic model of abuse" that a lot of reaction towards "MAP communities", "zoo communities", whatever relies on. We need to understand child abuse and animal abuse through lenses of power (AND work towards deconstructing the systems of power that allow them to happen) instead of just presenting it as "these SICK PEOPLE who have BAD SEX BRAINS were just born to abuse and need to Get Help/Be Arrested/Be Killed". I'm critical towards the idea of "a paraphilia" to begin with, and really just can't ignore that the idea of "non-normative sexuality" has historically and continues to include gay and trans people (the DSM-5 still lists "transvestic disorder" among its eight "paraphilic disorders").

I think I can combine these two points to say: A model of abuse that relies on "paraphilia" as the cause, the idea that some people are just born to be abusers due to some psychiatric or even neurological "defect", and that these people are in some way "deviant from the norm", is a model that not only ignores the systems of power that allow for abuse to happen AND the social settings where these kinds of harassment and abuse are extremely normalized (i.e. therefore not "deviant"), but is one that leaves people with abusive (sexually or otherwise) intrusive thoughts to believe that there is something innately wrong with them that idk, they can either "cure" with whatever Pedophile Conversion Therapy is supposed to be or "solve" by going to prison/being killed, depending on who they're talking to. I think this is an extremely reductive and oftentimes actively harmful model of thinking about abuse, because many, many people who actually abuse children are not "pedophiles" (or "MAPs") in the "psychiatric" sense, many, many people who actually abuse animals are not "zoophiles" in the "psychiatric" sense, and many people who experience thoughts or "urges" relating to these kinds of abuse are not going to be abusers. People understandably get very upset during conversations like this, but I do think it's very important to move past the very surface-level idea that idk, "pedophile bad, pedophile sick" and actually observe what allows child abuse to happen, AND to maybe approach online communities of young people beating themselves up over their intrusive thoughts with more sympathy other than the instinctive knee-jerk "pedophile bad, pedophile sick." I totally understand why ur hesitant to post abt this dw, this is a Really hard conversation to have on here, but I hope my thoughts are clear enough and don't leave any room for "oh so you LITERALLY support the BAD THING? We should kill everyone who literally supports the bad thing" bad-faith readings

[daedrabait]

Its WIP Wednesday again

I have a snippet from my newest fanfic in progress for my Faelon and Mercer Frey series.

You can read the series here (nsfw so beware)

But anyway - this takes place after Faelon does the Honningbrew Meadery job. For context, Faelon is my Dragonborn who has joined sides with Mercer Frey & is in a (strange) relationship with him. Here's a little peek at their scheming.

Snippet is SFW with lukewarm tension.

"We have business to attend to. I don't want to hear any of your trifles," Mercer snapped, motioning to his desk. He had lots of things on it. A statue of the Grey Fox stood on the edge of the desk, seemingly overlooking the valuables spread about. There were maps and papers there, and Faelon made out the deed amongst it all.

"What do you want me to do with this? It's the same evasive signature from before," the Bosmer growled, annoyed. What the hell was Mercer playing at?

"Only one person would seek to sabotage me. Karliah," the Guildmaster spat the name like it was a curse. Faelon thought to himself that Mercer underestimated the amount of people who disliked him. Even so, he was curious.

"Who is Karliah? I sense a story here," Faelon asked as propped himself against the wooden post of a nearby wall.

The look the Guildmaster threw at him was nothing short of venomous. His lined face was screwed up even more than usual, his eyes dark. "Karliah was part of the Nightingale Trinity. She was one of the best thieves I ever knew. Her and Gallus were close," he said with no small amount of contempt.

"When I killed Gallus, she fled from the scene. This made it remarkably easy for me to frame his death upon her. The little bitch has been plotting against me ever since - she's even had the nerve to send assassins after me on several occasions. And now she dares to muddle into the business of my guild. The guild that I earned from cutting away my own ends while she ran away to grieve a man who had everything handed to him quite easily, including the little wretch herself."

Oh, what bitterness! It was thrilling. Was that a hint of jealousy in his voice?

"Oh yeah? So, what, you were the little outcast of the trinity?" Faelon couldn't keep the grin off his face.

Mercer snarled at him, his grey-blue eyes flashing as he shoved the Bosmer's chest. Oh, he'd definitely hit a nerve. That was interesting.

"Gallus was the perfect leader. The perfect example of a prodigy: giving to the poor, being honest with the guild, using his silver tongue to get everything he ever wanted," Mercer spat, his hands still flush against Faelon's chest. His eyes were a maelstrom of emotions. "He couldn't have let me have one thing. Not even..." His jaw clenched as he wrenched his hands away from the Bosmer's chest. Faelon raised an eyebrow at him, and then it clicked.

Oh.

That was interesting.

"You were jealous," the Dragonborn purred, "You have a thing for this 'Karliah,' don't you?" He didn't attempt stop the chuckles that slipped out of him.

Mercer scowled and drew an ebony dagger, holding it up to Faelon's throat. The elf hummed and bared it willingly, a shower of tingles spreading through him. The Guildmaster growled, "I'm tired of you thinking everything is a joke. We could see how hard you'll laugh while choking on your own blood."

"I won't laugh at your pain again, dear Mercer - on my honor," Faelon hummed as he gripped the blade of the dagger. It was sharp as it bit into his skin. "But this sweet Karliah of yours is a threat to us, yes? How do you plan for us to handle her?"

Mercer's eyes had fallen onto Faelon's lips. The Bosmer smirked. Whatever feelings he had for Karliah in the past or present, the Guildmaster was his. He had Mercer wrapped around his finger.

"We'll have to kill her," the Breton said with a sense of finality. Faelon loved the sound of his voice when he was being serious. It was pitched low and confident. It sent thrills through him.

"Perfect," the Dragonborn hummed, "We're finally getting to the fun part of this grueling bit of business, don't you think?"