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nexadarling · 1 month

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Trigun Explicit Recs!

So it turns out there are too many good fics in this fandom and I maxed out the amount of links allowed in a single post (it's 100 btw) so I decided to split the E rated stuff from everything else, cause it makes sense to me.

I offer you my list of smut! Most of which will also give you so many emotions cause what is Vashwood with out self-loathing and biblical references. I tried to tag all the authors who have tumblrs, but if I missed someone pls tag them/let me know!

Any fic that features "+" after the word count is on-going/uncompleted. As they finish, I will add the final word count.

Check the tags yall!!!

(Non-explicit rec page)

so i'll sing to the grave (put you back together) by desertblooms - 18k; Vashwood; E; Canon-verse; Wolfwood doesn't feel worthy to touch Vash, so Vash shows him that's not true

la petite mort by @babeyxiao-art and expertfool - 3k; Vashwood; E; Trimax; look this is just straight smut involving a gun. If you're not into that i would highly advise you do not read this. If you are tho..... it did something to my brain chemistry for sure

Trillium and Ivy by @shastafirecracker - 80k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Funeral Director Wolfwood; Garden Center Vash; Wolfwood works at a funeral home across from the garden center, and notices the cute co-owner; this one is a personal favorite it makes me feel insane if I think about it too long

you'll never get enough by tagteamme ( @phaltu) - 19k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Boxer/Gym; Wolfwood owns a gym that is under Nai's thumb, Vash is a regular at the gym and should be off limits; I have read this at least twice and it occasionally haunts my dreams

Within Us An Orchard by plumtoad - 13k; Vashwood; E; Vash is a sad plant boi, so Wolfwood cheers him up feat. fruit

Amarillo Sky by just_a_lil_shipmate - 15k; Vashwood; E; Cowboy/Angel AU; Vash makes Wolfwood realize maybe he's not better off alone

i’m here in search of your glory (there’s been a million before me) by @sascake - 22k; Vashwood; E; Post-Trimax fix it feat. Wolfwood's entire orphanage

Your Beauty Never, Ever Scared Me by Sacramental_Wine - 5k; Vashwood; E; Wolf shifter!Wolfwood (if you've ever seen Wolf's Rain it's like that); Vash helps an injured wolf, the next morning a man shows up at his door

if you were church (I’d get on my knees) by iokanaan - 18k; Vashwood; E; T4T; Actual Priest Wolfwood, feat. trimax Vashwood as guardian angels (I have no excuse for this one but it goes really hard)

someone to last your whole life by catchatter ( @needlab7) - 73k; Vashwood; E; Post-Trimax fix it, with deep attention to the realities of mourning and what it means to have mourned someone who is no longer dead; genuinely one of the most beautiful things I have ever read

to control against the pull by catchatter ( @needlab7) - 13k; Vashwood; E; A/B/O; "Wolfwood tries to help out the bro and gets consumed with The Longing"; It is my personal mission to make everyone read this. Please, even if you don't like omegaverse just give it a chance I am begging you

CAUSE OF DEATH (See instructions and examples) by neatrogenous ( @floofyfluff) - 39k; Vashwood; E; Post-Trimax fix it, but Vash runs faster than the Flash from every single Emotion he's ever had (body horror cw for the first chapter)

Gun Barrel Red Hot by varelsen ( @cloudstrifing) - 17k; Vashwood; E; plant heat plant heat plant heat plant hea-

Strange Powers by @tenshinokorin - 5k; Vashwood; E; they accidentally get high and fuck about it; I laughed my ass off reading this, pls, it's so good

when your stitch comes loose by @starkillling - 4k; Vashwood; E; Vashwood's relationship with Vash's wings

End Racism in the OTW | a kind heart to haunt by littleghost ( @ghostlandtoo) - 20k; Vashwood; E; Cowboy/Western AU; Wolfwood is an outlaw, Vash left that life a long time ago and doesn't want to get wrapped up in it again

you tear down my reason by halfdemonvash - 8k; Vashwood; E; .... trimaxVashwood/stampedeVashwood; yeah it's selfcest, i'm not sorry about it, it's so fucking good

Bind Your Faith in Scars and Tape by just_a_lil_shipmate - 8k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - College; Vash pines after Wolfwood, and then properly falls for him when they're forced to spend time in the university greenhouse regularly; Meryl is my favorite

blood in the badlands by eviscerates - 34k; Vashwood; E; Vampire Vash/Vampire Hunter Wolfwood on NML; the Eye of Michael is a hunter group, Wolfwood is not supposed to have feelings for Vash

the sun is warm (i miss your smile) by mor (mornin) ( @bakubaji) - 12k; Vashwood; E; also Vamp Vash/Vamp Hunter Wolfwood but this time modern AU, and Wolfwood is independent instead of with EoM

you're a canary (i'm a coal mine) by PotatoButt ( @rubyredgh0st) - 32k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Zoo keeper Vash; Orphanage Worker Wolfwood; Wolfwood brings his kids to see the tomas show, but sometimes he comes alone to watch the cute handler; Brad is so protective here I love him actually

The Lighthouse by EloFromMars - 51k; Vashwood; E; Lighthouse guy Wolfwood; Eldritch Horror Vash; legitimate lovecraftian level eldritch horror but like.... Vash is still a baby girl and Wolfwood is still into it; honorary mention for Kuroneko

try my hardest (if you ask me to) by nbagenda - 15k; Vashwood; E; the team stays at Ship 3, and Wolfwood has Feelings about everything being so clean (and so much gay panic about Vash); this one uses he/they interchangeably for Vash which I really really love

water supply by outdoorcats - 9k; Vashwood; E; they get wine drunk and get like emotionally horny

perfect world by outdoorcats - 8k; Vashwood; E; sequel to above fic; less drunk but more (beautifully) emotional; "What if we ran away and got married" vibes

today, and all of the days by @pushclouds - 24k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Vash owns a donut shop, Wolfwood owns a smoke shop/bar; Vash doesn't realize they're definitely dating

My Body's Moving Into Retrograde by Sacramental_Wine - 3k; Vashwood; E; Wolfwood makes Vash want something for himself for once

dance in our catastrophe by @pushclouds - 28k; Vashwood; E; Post-Trimax fix it; Wolfwood and Vash are stuck in a safe house together, what could possibly go wrong?!; Wolfwood's inner monologue in this is so delightful and sad

welcome to the beautiful place by @pinklicour - 7k; Vashwood; E; Vash watches Wolfwood interact with a kid for too long and has Feelings about it, turns out Wolfwood feels the same

i think that we should go and get you out of here by molotovhappyhour - 39k; Vashwood; E; Exorcist Wolfwood AU; Wolfwood travels to July to help rid them of a haunting that's taken root there for years, Vash is, of course, at the center of it

I'd Get Rid of the Sun in Favor of the Moonshine by FlowerFed - 22k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Coffeeshop/Cafe; Milly asks Vash to vouch for her ex so he can get a job at the same cafe as him, Vash meets a handsome stranger at the beach; surely there is no connection between these events...

Trial and error by Anonymous - 10k; Vashwood; E; Vash has freaky plant parts and is pretty sure he can't orgasm, but he's happy to be with Wolfwood however he wants! Wolfwood is determined to prove Vash wrong; Literally cannot get enough of unconventional, incompatible plant stuff for Vash, so this was very fun

Saturdays at 6 p.m. by maginot - 42k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Vash reaches out to professional Dom Wolfwood to ask if he's taking on new subs. Wolfwood realizes he's fucked as soon as Vash walks through his front door; Okay yes this is kinky in the sense that it is an actual, structured BDSM relationship, but it's actually not the kinkiest thing on here??? It is absolutely delightfully spicy and sweet though. And watching Wolfwood fall apart about actually falling for Vash is so fucking GOOD; also vash's pain kink has me on the fucking floor dear god

when I picture you by @pinklicour - 5k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - College; This is just a silly little fic about Vashwood hooking up, but Wolfwood's pining is so precious and I've reread the scene where they actually become a couple several times cause it makes me so happy

a tide of tender mercies by @gloriousporpoise - 23k; Vashwood; E; Wolfwood and Vash are on the run after July, chasing bounties; Wolfwood finds himself in a bad way without his serum and gets taken care of (ha, take that, WW!); I'm a sucker for Wolfwood pining hoplessly after Vash and this is just the perfect mix of pining and his snark

sugar rush by corvidcaper ( @not-miss-marple) - 42k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Vash owns a candy shop; Friends with benefits to lovers; Everyone knows their dating except the two of them, and goddamn does Wolfwood try to keep it casual; Spoiler, it is anything but casual lol

At the Top of the World by Insomniac_with_dreams - 35k; Vashwood; E; Cowboy AU; Wolfwood follows a help-wanted ad and finds himself at the Saverem ranch for the summer. He gets... more than he bargained for; God above please read this it's so beautiful and heartfelt and wonderful and they love each other so much fuck

four suns by Joelene - 31k; Vashwood; E; Trimax Vashwood and Tristamp Vashwood meet in the middle of the desert!!; This is genuinely very cute as well as hot, I reread this immediately after finishing it lol Trimax Vashwood being competitive and then getting lost in themselves is so precious; Wolfwood begging will always be my downfall; They all fuck, but they don't fuck each other. Like each version Vashwood stays together. They do all make out with their own alternative versions, so do with that what you will I guess

Strawberries & Cigarettes by Umbr_el_on - 71k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Tattoo shop/Flower shop; "No, seriously, Livio, it's just casual, it doesn't mean anything, stop"; several days later: *calls Livio crying about how much Vash makes him feel*; and that's it that's the fic; I like that they're both broken and fucked up here, and they make mistakes and piss each other off, but they continue to choose to try together. It just makes me really happy. They aren't perfect but they're perfect together

Daylily by @needlesknives (bakusboi) - 10k+; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Tattoo shop; Vash comes to Wolfwood wanting to get his scarring covered with tattoos, Wolfwood realizes this project entails a lot more than he anticipated. In several ways

Ascension Day by farseersfool ( @birdadjacent) - 26k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU (but still Plant powers); Wolfwood is a hitman hired by Nai to protect Vash. Surely keeping his mark as close as physically possible is only the logical thing to do. Right? Right.

Holding My Breath by @nekotachis - 9k; Vashwood; E; Canon-verse; Vash tells Wolfwood he's never been on a date, so Wolfwood takes him on one. Feelings are definitely not had during said date

sun comin' up by amaiyo - 23k; Vashwood; E; Mermaid AU; Modern AU; Wolfwood is a priest assigned to a tiny island, and sometimes he stands on the pier at night to listen to the strange songs on the ocean wind

you'll leave me lonely at best by @procrastinating-bookworm - 3k; Vashwood; E; Post-Badlands Rumble; You know the fucking drill, it's time for some widow Wolfwood reunion sex; God I love the way this fandom explores the hell Wolfwood went through before Vash pops back up like "Jk guys, I'm not dead!"

Long Goodbyes by ChenamaReel - 17k; Vashwood; E; Trimax; After the Arc and before the orphanage, Vash and Wolfwood talk about the what-ifs of the future. With the knowledge of their respective missions, their normal flirting banter turns to something more real

song of solomon 4:7 by ellisisntreal - 68k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Trans Vash; A cute new neighbor moves in across from Wolfwood, one who he quickly realizes is the hottest DILF ever and exactly his type; listen. LISTEN! This is so good, Vash's kid is 13, so he's old enough to be funny and snarky, Vash and Wolfwood's banter is amazing, and scenes with all three of them (and eventually Livio) are actually so funny I was wheezing. Idk how you write dialog so real and hilarious, but I had a grand fucking time

I know I'm gonna die of this by @orcelito - 13k; Vashwood; E; T4T; Vash doesn't like to be touched during sex. He does, however, desperately want to fuck Wolfwood. Wolfwood shows him exactly how much he appreciates it; THE Strap Fic; the fact that this is part of a series based on Nothing But Thieves' song Impossible has me incredibly fucked up; Nico, darling, thank you for writing this, it was delightful

Nothing Left to Hide by GGumdrops - 7k; Vashwood; E; Wing fic wing fic wing fic; Vash is clearly uncomfortable but doesn't want to tell Wolfwood why. When he finally convinces Vash to show him, he preens his wings for him

geoplant medicinals by @avoidingavoidance - 11k; Vashwood; E; Tristamp; Wolfwood accidentally gets soooo fucking high. Vash joins him and they have some frankly awesome sex; Wolfwood spends this whole fic being sickeningly in love with his boyfriend and thinking about how pretty Vash is and I love it

with the same sweet shock of when Adam first came by feelingfoxylmao - 12k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU- BDSM Scene; Wolfwood fucks up at the BDSM club and Vash (consensually and pre-scripted) teaches him his lesson; Dom Vash, Sub Wolfwood, Vash makes Wolfwood bark, what more could I possibly say to make you want to read this??? It's wonderful; slight secondhand embarrassment warning for the beginning where Wolfwood fucks up, but it's worth getting through, trust me

like the holding of hands (like the breaking of glass) by @flowercitti - 10k; Vashwood; E; Tristamp; Vash wakes up after the sandsteamer and faces Wolfwood's full knowledge of his inhumanness; (spoilers WW still thinks Vash is beautiful)

Little Pieces of the Nothing that Fall by starkstateofmind - 5k; Vashwood; E; Tristamp; it rains and Vash manic pixie dream girls himself into bed with Wolfwood; i kinda stared at a wall for a little after reading this, it's really beautiful I might also be a manic pixie dream girl

Sing Pretty Melodies on the Motel Bed by @amphetamine-keen - 5k; Vashwood; E; Trimax vibes; Wolfwood convinces Vash to try a vaginal plug; this is just smut but I did read it at least twice. idk what that says about me, but it does say that it's a good fic

Wildflowers by @shastafirecracker - 103k; Vashwood; E; Dark Fantasy AU; cottagecore; Trans Wolfwood; Wolfwood is sent to kill the Beast Lord of the forest and gets far more than he bargained for; dear fucking God please read this holy shit I cannot overstate how good the world building is

in the woods somewhere by halfdemonvash - 42k; Vashwood; E; Fantasy AU; cottagecore; Vash finds Wolfwood injured in his forest and takes him to his home to nurse him back to health. Wolfwood... kinda really loves it. Even if he wasn't entirely there on accident

waking up in vegas by kae_karo - 17k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; They wake up married to each other in Vegas after a night they barely remember. They try to track down the chapel they got married in, but kinda don't wanna undo it by the end of the day

laughter lines by @beesinspades - 21k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Ace Vash; Grey Ace Wolfwood; Knives sends Wolfwood to bring Vash back to him. Vash doesn't want to go. Wolfwood kind of doesn't want to make him; crying go read this i love it so much all of Bee's stuff brings me such joy

Pillow Talk by fantasy_stupid - 47k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Nai sends Wolfwood to secretly trail Vash and make sure he's safe while Nai is gone. Vash clocks him immediately and they try to make the best of it; bodyguard Wolfwood you have my heart and soul

Citronella by @canyondotcom - 58k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Vampire AU; Creature Vash; Woodworker Wolfwood; Wolfwood wakes up in the middle of the night to something--no, someone on his porch. Against his better judgement, he lets them in... Things get... Interesting; Uuggggghhhhh God this is so good I love creature Vash and the vampire lore is so unique and non-traditional I love it so much

take my breaking heart (and tear it all apart) by johnnyfucksup - 12k; Vashwood; E; Wolfwood tries not to let himself want. Enter Vash, who ruins those plans

just a holy fool by @avoidingavoidance - 19k; Vashwood; E; Tristamp; Wolfwood is so upset about how much of a soft spot he has for Vash and Vash somehow makes it worse all the time always; sure Wolfwood, we all believe that you're annoyed with Vash and not stupidly in love with him

A Step By Step Guide to Love and Peace, Written by Vash Saverem (Co-Authored by Friends, Family, and Nicholas D. Wolfwood) by calandos - 71k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Fleabag; Trans Vash; Priest Wolfwood; It's fucking.... it's a fleabag AU idk how much harder I call sell this I clicked immediately when I saw the tag; yeah, it has the confession scene; this made me want to cry. I may have actually cried; god I relate to Vash so much

Late Night Confessional by ValiantRose ( @sleepyartcryptid) - 12k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU I think?; Trans Wolfwood; Priest Wolfwood; Vash comes to confess his sins... the fic then earns it's place on the explicit rec list

giving in to your fever touch by honeyseeking - 46k; Vashwood; E; Trimax/98; Wolfwood finds Vash as Eriks and gives him three days to make up his mind; *violently shaking this fic* it's so full of emotions

I'm not a Psycho (I'm Just Trying to Get Laid) by @inkfishie - 34k; Vashwood; E; Tristamp; Various times Vash and Wolfwood have... encounters. Feat. Vash's emotions and awkwardness; this is so cuteeee

in love with my own sins by spicecandy ( @gaycowboyjesus) - 15k; Vashwood, Vash/Vash, Wolfwood/Wolfwood; E; Trimax VW meet Tristamp VW; listen the everything between everyone is so good but the romantic tension between Tristamp VW is so cute

Give Me Mercy No More. by hollyleighannee ( @wytchsbrew) - 14k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Bodyguard Wolfwood; During a sandstorm, Vash spends a special night with his secret boyfriend; OH MAN OH GOD WOW; first of all this Wolfwood... I gotta go sit down for a second, damn; the sex is hot, but the emotions are hotter Wolfwood is so careful to give Vash everything he wants and cares so much they are both so in love; Holly your fics give me so much joy, I'm so sorry for decimating your notifications

a softer world by Harubo ( @helloharubo) - 2k; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Painter Vash; Doctor Wolfwood; Reincarnation vibes; Wolfwood has regular dreams of Vash where he's covered in scars and full of a deep, aching sadness. When he wakes up, he needs his husband to reassure him he's still in one piece

Where The Delicate Stops (Show Me) by @nexadarling - 10k; Vashwood; E; Trimax; Creature Vash; Predator/Prey; Wolfwood sets off Vash's competitive nature and gets chased through the woods. He likes it more than expected; shameless self-plug, I'm just real proud of this one

save a horse by ofxanadu - 37k+; Vashwood; E; Western AU; Trans Vash; Wolfwood saves Vash from getting mugged by the Badlands Gang and has a night so memorable he's hung up on it for almost a year when Vash shows up again; i cannot even put into words my thoughts on this fic I'm just making feral sounds about how much I love it

la vache! by @skittidyne - 28k+; Vashwood; E; Modern AU - Sex Work; Sex Worker Vash; Trans Vash; Wolfwood needs to learn French very quickly since he promised Livio he would. He finds his solution in Vash's... unique way of teaching (it might involve dildos); I'm rabid over the fact there are not more chapters of this

honeysuckle red by @beelzebby666 - 43k+; Vashwood; E; Modern AU; Line Cook Wolfwood (yes it's important shut up); A one night stand turns into Wolfwood spending so much time with Vash and his fucking garden (why does he like bees so much I love him????); Wolfwood just wants to be kept. He just wants to be kept!!!

If you know me no you don't!

Come tell me your opinions about all of these my DMs are open I promise

#trigun #vash the stampede #wolfwood #vash #trigun stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun maximum #trimax #vashwood #fanfic #AUs #Trans Vash #Trans Wolfwood #T4T vashwood

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utapri-translations-uuuu · 19 days

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Drown in - Lyrics + Translation

Please do not repost/retranslate without permission.

Kanji:

響きあうのが常　溶け合う夢

魅かれて Love thing ときめく胸

上手に振舞っても　I can see your mind

仕草で惑わす　本音と嘘

愛を試す　駆け引きは

大人のフリじゃもう満たせないや

焼け付く傷を冷たく癒す

火照る頬濡らした True tears

爪痕が語る　Midnight

何度も聞きたい　切ない

甘い罠に雁字搦めの Miss you

痛みが織りなす Pleasure

知ってるから Habitually sweet

もどかしく求めて

どこまでも I'm going to drown

選択するまま　待てない　Limit

主役は Oneself 誰でもない

人生はカットなしの　ロングフィルム

切り取られた今日　戻らぬ過去

理想の明日はどこなのか？

目隠し外すのはやっぱり It's you

ため息の中　にじむ優しさ

くすぐった本能止まらない

本当を見せて　All night

思いは重なる絶対

時間の波に　誘われて Kiss you

受け止めあいたい Feelings

すれ違いさえ Turn it into a joy

どうすれば伝わる？

君なしじゃ Falling all the way down

触れた指と指　絡まり合い

秒針の Tick Tack 遠くなる

鼓動だけ２人包んで

爪痕が語る　Midnight

何度も聞きたい　切ない

甘い罠に雁字搦めの Miss you

痛みが織りなす Pleasure

知ってるから Habitually sweet

もどかしく求めて

酸いも甘いも　愛も悲哀も

手を取って一緒に Let's drown

Rōmaji:

Hibikiau no ga tsune tokeau yume

Hikarete Love thing tokimeku mune

Jōzu ni furumatte mo I can see your mind

Shigusa de madowasu hon'ne to uso

Ai o tamesu kakehiki wa

Otona no furi ja mō mitasenai ya

Yaketsuku kizu o tsumetaku iyasu

Hoteru hoho nurashita True tears

Tsumeato ga kataru Midnight

Nando mo kikitai setsunai

Amai wana ni ganjigarame no Miss you

Itami ga orinasu Pleasure

Shitteru kara Habitually sweet

Modokashiku motomete

Doko made mo I’m going to drown

Sentaku suru mama matenai Limit

Shuyaku wa Oneself dare demo nai

Jinsei wa katto nashi no rongu firumu

Kiritorareta kyō modoranu kako

Risō no asu wa doko na no ka?

Mekakushi hazusu no wa yappari It’s you

Tameiki no naka nijimu yasashi-sa

Kusugutta hon'nō tomaranai

Hontō o misete All night

Omoi wa kasanaru zettai

Jikan no nami ni izanawarete Kiss you

Uketome aitai Feelings

Surechigai sae Turn it into a joy

Dō sureba tsutawaru?

Kimi nashi ja Falling all the way down

Fureta yubi to yubi karamari ai

Byōshin no Tick Tack tōku naru

Kodō dake futari tsutsunde

Tsumeato ga kataru Midnight

Nando mo kikitai setsunai

Amai wana ni ganjigarame no Miss you

Itami ga orinasu Pleasure

Shitteru kara Habitually sweet

Modokashiku motomete

Sui mo amai mo ai mo hiai mo

Te o totte issho ni Let’s drown

Translation:

Always resonating together, our dreams melt together

Attracted by this love thing, your heart throbs with excitement

Even if you pretend well, I can see your mind

Deceiving me with your gestures, your real intention and lies

Trying out love, this push and pull of

Pretending to be an adult is no longer enough

Healing my burning wounds with cold,

True tears dampen my flushed cheeks

Scratch marks tell the story of Midnight

I want to hear it over and over again. It’s painful

I’m completely stuck in the sweet trap that is missing you

Since I know the pleasure woven

From pain is Habitually sweet,

I impatiently yearn for it

I'm going to drown endlessly

You can’t wait to make your choices, there’s a Limit

The protagonist is Oneself, no one else

Life is a long film without cuts

Today is cut away, and the past won’t return

Where is the ideal tomorrow?

It's you, after all, who takes off your blindfold

Tenderness reveals itself through a sigh

I can’t control my newly aroused instincts

Show me your true self All night

Our feelings are overlapping, definitely

Drawn by the waves of time, I Kiss you

I want us to embrace each other’s Feelings

Let’s turn even our misunderstandings Into a joy

How can I make you understand?

Without you, I’m Falling all the way down

Our fingers touch and intertwine

The Tick Tack of the second hand grows distant

And only the beating of our hearts surrounds us

Scratch marks tell the story of Midnight

I want to hear it over and over again. It’s painful

I’m completely stuck in the sweet trap that is missing you

Since I know the pleasure woven

From pain is Habitually sweet,

I impatiently yearn for it

Both the sour and sweet, love and sorrow

Let’s hold hands and drown together

#uta no prince sama #utapri #translation #english #reiji kotobuki #Solo Best Album #quartet night #qn

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suguwu · 4 months

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—sponsor a wip for gaza! - fully covered!

i will be joining @ficsforgaza to both spread the word and to hopefully gather some donations if anyone is interested!

i will be doing the sponsor a wip option. as i am a slower writer, i will be setting word count limits for sponsorship so i don't get overwhelmed; they are outlined below with the wip descriptions.

—how it works

RATE: $1 per 100 words

INSTRUCTIONS: donate to a vetted fundraiser of your choosing, take a screenshot of the donation confirmation (make sure your private information is censored as i will be sending ficsforgaza the screenshot of your donation to make sure it isn't being used for multiple writers) and send it to me along with the title of whatever WIP you're sponsoring!

Here’s an example:

bee! here's proof of my donation to help rebuild ahmed's family life in gaza gofundme. I'd like this to go toward the wip 'moon eater' thank you! [screenshot.png showing evidence of donation states that $1 was given, therefore 100 words will be written for the wip 'moon eater']

upon receiving your ask (i won't be publishing them) i will amend the list below and prioritize progressing that wip as well as keeping this post updated weekly.

please note that i am a slow writer and some of these may take a while to come out, but they will come out!

i may add in more wips as time goes on!

i've never done anything like this before, so please let me know if you have any questions or if you feel i've missed anything!

—current wips

MOON EATER — diluc x reader

f!reader, marriage of convenience, politics, some manipulation, pining, slow burn, eventual smut, jealousy, some blood and gore.

A Mondstadt diplomat in Liyue, your close relationship with the Fatui Harbinger Tartaglia draws Diluc's piercing attention. Ever hungry for information on the Fatui, he comes up with a plan—marrying you. It's the best way. There's nothing else in play. Or so he tells himself.

starting wc: 14,447/25,000+

donated (goal) wc: 3,000/3,000 fully covered!

progress tracker: 3,000/3,000 ✅

—

WRAP MY TEETH AROUND THE WORLD — nai x reader

gn!reader, god of the hunt nai au, likely some dark content, other tags to come.

A child of the harvest, your life is forfeit when you're chosen for the Hunt's Rite. You don't expect the god to take an interest in you instead.

starting wc: 3,663/10,000+

donated (goal) wc: 5,000/5,000 fully covered!

progress tracker: 2,853/5,000

thank you in advance for any donation you may give, as i know that times are tough. if none of these interest you, i totally understand! please consider checking out the other writers for fics for gaza and see if there's something more your speed!

last updated august 28, 2024

#bee.navi #fics for gaza

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sisitrip · 29 days

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"The End is Nai"

Gallavich A.U.gust

Sigh. I missed the Gallavich A.U.gust 2024 @gallavichthings week for supernatural themed works. So, I'm just flinging this out there because it's my first demon related work and it is mess-ay.

That said, I had fun. Hope you enjoy "The End is Nai."

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“Father, please take these feelings from me or end my life as your servant,” Mickey whispered, slipping inside the cool building. A blasphemous plea coming from someone who does not pray. But, it was critical.

His desire could end his life in this church today.

The familiar pew creaked softly under his weight as if in greeting. It wouldn’t be far off to say he and this church knew each other well. They should. Together, they’d killed enough demons in its walls to make them old friends.

Basilica de Guadalupe’s beautiful stone structure swam with the cloying scent of incense. But, the few parishioners in attendance couldn’t smell it like he could. The simple chemical warning told his senses that a malevolent presence was near. He could practically feel the target. It was close.

A sudden press of cold smoked air painfully tightened the skin all over his body.

“Why do the churches in Mexico keep using the Three Kings Pontifical Blend? That incense smells like poor choices dipped in potpourri. I prefer Will & Baumer. The French variety, mind you.”

Nai’s lofty comment startled him more than his materialization next to him. Caught unaware for the first time in years, he cursed softly and turned to the demon, telling himself not to be impressed by what he saw. Instead of a vicious battle face, he was met with a soft smile and curious green eyes. It rattled him that Nai didn’t seem ready to fight, especially since it was their job to kill each other.

“Prefer the Gloria F8 blend myself,” he finally mumbled, heart speeding. He allowed himself to gaze at Nai’s straight, fiery red hair. It was lightly waved at the root, as if fighting to curl. He wondered if curls would suit Nai and if they would feel as soft as he imagined.

“Oh my, a non-traditionalist.” Nai tilted his head in a disarming way and continued with a purring that had him rooted to the spot. “I wonder what your bosses in Citta del Vaticano would do if they knew. Flagellation, hopefully? The rope enthusiast in me is practically rigid at the thought.” A slow smile spread across Nai’s perfect features.

He stiffened. Flirting? In a church? Nai shifted toward him, bringing the full power of that face to bear down on his indifference. In response, his tattoos grew heavy on his skin, warming the air in anticipation of an attack.

“My bosses ain’t none of your business,” he said, making the mistake of looking Nai in the eyes.

He was immediately lost.

The taste of chocolate entered his mouth, rich and thick. It was mixed with the slight savory taste of peanuts, caramel and something else. Something even sweeter than chocolate.

“Nougat,” Nai whispered knowingly, the cold smoke scent radiating off him as he inched closer. “Creamy nougat. A main ingredient in your favorite candy bar.”

He gritted his teeth. The flagrant invasion of his senses triggered a small tremor, showering dust from the ceiling. While he got a coating, Nai was spared. The dust floated in a corona-like crown around the demon’s head, as if unwilling to settle on something so unholy.

“Sensory infusement of a candy bar is entry level at best,” he said disdainfully, brushing dust off his shoulders. “Are we dehydrated? There’s a bowl of water in the back. Help yourself.”

Nai’s verdant eyes danced with amusement. “I’ll be saying ‘no thank you’ to the offer of lethally blessed water. And to prove I’m less violently inclined than you, you should know I’m utterly wounded by how unimpressed you are. We can’t have that. Let me try again.”

The taste of sour cherry, silkily warm, filled his mouth. Not just the sour cherry, but also the sweet dough surrounding it and the butter it was tossed in. He could even taste the dollop of sour cream. Vareniki. A dish his mother made for him when he was a sick child. Before she abandoned him. He blinked, stunned.

“Ah, a direct hit,” Nai whispered, delighted. “Maybe I’ll make vareniki for you one day. Just like your incubator used to mak-”

He grabbed the front of Nai’s white linen shirt, fisting it hard.

“She was my mother. Not a fucking incubator,” he said through his teeth. “Watch yourself, dyavol.”

Nai merely smiled at him, unbothered. “I should give you the same advice. Your tattoos are about to set this place on fire.”

The air around them grew hotter and the wood varnish on the pews began to bubble and smoke in reaction to the energy his tattoos were emitting. He had to calm down, but Nai was making that impossible with his proximity and his smile. Incredibly, Nai inched closer still and their thighs ghosted against each other. He forced himself to let Nai’s shirt go and instead simply stared at him while he was sized up as well. He fought the urge to smooth his hair.

“You have a black ring around your irises,” Nai murmured, leaning in a little and stunning his senses. “Which one of us gave you that?”

He let Nai sweep a bit of dust from his temple and resisted leaning into the touch.

“Vorter.”

Nai sighed while running his eyes greedily over his face.

“Oh, he is particularly nasty, that one. You might not believe this, but I severed my bond with him after what he did to your Ignatius. Tell me, has he recovered the use of his sight?”

Another tremor. This one was strong enough to rattle the stained glass windows.

“No thanks to Vorter. And what do you mean bond? Bond like what, like a … boyfriend bond?” He was sweating.

Nai chuckled and dragged his gaze up and down his body, pale lashes sweeping his cheeks prettily.

“We're no different than the bleating cattle you protect. We prefer companionship too.”

He stiffened. “Fuck you. People aren’t cattle and neither am I.”

Nai sniffed the air between them, putting an arm around the back of his seat. The sensitive skin between his shoulders sang from the whisper of Nai’s tracing thumb. A simple touch and he's lost again. God, help him.

“Oh, I agree. You're like a spring lamb and smell just as sweet. Even your anger is intoxicating to my senses. The things you make me imagine, Mikhailo.”

Nai offered up his name delicately for the first time, like a hot house flower opening for the briefest moment. They stared at each other as the church started to violently shake around them.

“Looks like your time is up,” he whispered as Nai grimaced in pain. The church’s air intensified its invisible defense system, pulling small grains of black sand from Nai’s freckled cheeks where he brushed them off like so many flies.

“So it seems.” Nai stood, all six feet of him. “No matter though. I think this little experiment was a success.”

With a soft, inward flex of air, Nai apparated midwalk into the aisle, startling a veiled parishioner. She stared in horror from behind her black lace veil and crossed herself. If only it was that easy to kill Nai’s kind.

“What experiment?” he called after Nai, tattoos no longer heavy, but sliding around his skin ready to be weaponized. He didn’t want this to be over yet.

“Proximity test. I wanted to see how long we could be face to face before it became … unpleasant,” Nai called back, still walking.

He rolled his eyes.

“You know what happens when you get near one of us. It’s been established since the beginning of time.”

Nai turned and walked backwards with a smile that slowed the pace of his heart. Even though Nai should be repugnant for simply being what he was, he couldn’t see anything but his beauty. He was certain of nothing anymore.

“Oh, I’m aware of what happens to your ancient markings in our presence. I didn’t mean that type of proximity.”

He stepped into the aisle too, shaking dust out of his hair. The church growled from its rafters to its foundation, pulling screams from the few parishioners. He barely heard it.

“Then what kind of proximity test?” he asked, desperate to keep Nai a few more moments.

Nai stopped and the church thumped hard on its foundation, sending the congregants running for the back exits.

“My proximity to the man and not the Vatican weapon.” Nai’s jovial smile slipped and his confusion was plain. “It’s just that, really it's a bit, you probably wouldn’t understa-”

“Today, dyavol,” he interrupted, tattoos singing to be let loose.

The confusion fled Nai’s face completely and all that was left was soft, vulnerable wonder.

“I …,” Nai smiled ruefully. “I didn’t expect to like you.”

The church rumbled hard around them, sending small pieces of painted stone ceiling to the floor. A crack signaled a larger piece coming loose above him, opening the roof to send a beam of sunlight directly onto Nai, bathing him in a beatific glow. Mesmerized, he forgot to duck, not that he would have cleared the space in time. But, the impact he expected never came. He looked up and the stone slab, about thirty feet wide and possibly weighing a ton, hovered in the air, held there by two of Nai’s relaxed, raised fingers. With a gentle flick, the slab shot into the confession box, shattering it. He almost felt sorry for the priest who’d been watching from the lectern with wide eyes. The poor man screamed and fled the pulpit.

“I hope you’re not waiting for a thank you,” he said, brushing dust off his shoulders, heart hammering.

“I’d be disappointed if you did,” Nai replied, Its dark hilarity back in place. “I’ll settle for a drink the next time we cross paths though. Domaine de la Romanee-Conti Grand Cru. 1945 is my preference if you can find it.”

With that, Nai stepped out into the sunshine. The quaking church stilled, leaving him in dazed silence.

He sighed as his tattoos resumed their place on his knuckles. The Sede was going to lose its shit over this. The story of how a demon got close enough to kill, yet walked away alive was going to be required at his Rome debriefing. Malene was going to kill him for the headache coming her way.

But, all he could think about was where he was going to find a Romanee-Conti burgundy, circa 1945.

#gallavich fanfic #gallavich #my fic #gallavich fanfiction #ian x mickey #gallavich fic #writing #gallavich fan fiction #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #shameless us

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tgrailwar-zero · 17 days

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(Servant Zoom) Rider, we're going to a party!! oh oh! I'm assuming Saber's got a copy of the contract she signed without reading it from Jaguar by now, can you still look into that?

CONSTANTINE: "Our Saber just left for said party before I could ask."

CONSTANTINE: "As for you all... well, you do deserve a break. Just take care, okay?"

GIUSEPPE: "Well, we'll see what we can find out at the party. Let's go."

You returned the LITTLE GUY to... wherever he went when he was in your inventory, and made your way down the Megalopolis, following the instructions that GIUSEPPE had.

You recognized the building.

And then the floor number.

And then the penthouse.

This was DURYODHANA's place. You saw that it was full of people. Some of them were fighters, some of them weren't. The boss lady herself pushed through the attendees, approaching you.

JAGUAR MAN: "Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in!"

GIUSEPPE: "Madame Jaguar."

KUKULKAN: "Miss Jaguar!"

JAGUAR MAN: "So, you made it. Our Samurai is already at the bar if you're lookin' for her. Listen, I'm not gonna bug ya' over Bout stuff. Not unless you really wanna talk shop, that is. Right now, this Jaguar is sitting back and enjoying herself. The first round of fights and the finals are always the toughest to set up, so I'm relaxing. And while our 'Jishnu' is in one hell of a mood--"

Before she finished, DURYODHANA sauntered over.

DURYODHANA: "Uh-oh, my ears are burning."

JAGUAR MAN: "Ah… haha! There's my guy! Listen, Duryodhana. You're bein' real generous, lending us your place as a venue. Gotta say, we really appreciate it."

DURYODHANA: "Oh, I know. I know. There's no need to thank me. All are welcome here tonight. Drink and eat as you please- feast until you're full! No, even more than that! Dance, laugh, break a chair if you want! A window! Who gives a damn! I certainly don't! Ha-ha-ha!"

DURYODHANA: "Tonight, we have fun! It's the Flaming Bout, after all! A huge congratulations to all of my fellow fighters! Wahahahaha!"

He raised his glass, as the other guests let out a whooping cheer as he pushed his way back through the party. He seemed like he was in high spirits, considering his loss. Maybe a bit rowdy, sure, but this was a large celebration.

JAGUAR MAN: "He's spiraling."

Oh.

JAGUAR MAN: "The only thing keeping him sane is social praise. So just… ix-nay on the oss-lay, okay? Outside of that, enjoy yourselves. Mingle, chat, just don't do anything that'll turn into a PR nightmare for me, alright?"

With that, she waved and waded back into the crowd.

Well… the party seemed busy at least. You watched as KUKULKAN wandered off in one direction, and it seemed like GIUSEPPE simply vanished into the background.

You saw where KUKULKAN wandered off to. She was making small talk with a shy, yet ominous-looking man off in the corner. From the brief clip you saw, this was the WATERSIDE REVENANT.

IZOU and MUSASHI were making conversation by the bar.

It didn't take much effort to clock CITT, as massive as he was in the golden armor, idly speaking to a stylish-looking man.

You saw ORION floating by a masked man and a woman, who was idly yet irritably pushing him away with one hand.

Even though JAGUAR MAN said she was relaxing, you saw her making the rounds. Though she was also taking breaks, she just didn't seem like the type that could sit still for very long.

Then, of course, there was DURYODHANA. He was sequestered away from the rest of the party, idly drinking the night away.

#thgw story #endless whispers #thgw: chapter 6 #main post

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harley-sunday · 4 months

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Renaissance

Renaissance [noun]

re·nais·sance ˌren-ə-ˈsän(t)s -ˈzän(t)s

1. capitalized : the period of European history between the 14th and 17th centuries marked by a flourishing of art and literature inspired by ancient times and by the beginnings of modern science 2. often capitalized : a movement or period of great activity (as in literature, science, and the arts) 3. literal translation from French : re-birth

Summary: Charles wins the Monaco Grand Prix.

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x reader

Warnings: None.

Word count: 765 (a short one, I know)

AN: You know I had to come out of retirement after Charles winning his home Grand Prix. Hope you enjoy this little drabble. Please come yell at me in the comments ♥

Part of Rituals

Charles Leclerc, in 2021, when asked if he has any race rituals: “At every start of the season, until F2, my grandmother used to take my race suits, remove one of the sponsor logos and sew a little cross instead of it. Now grandma is gone, I can’t sew and the ritual is over. I was thinking about keeping a lucky charm in my pocket but then I thought to myself: if you need an object [to feel better], then you are missing something on the mental aspect, so I let it go.”

[Angel of God, my guardian dear,]

The ritual is not over.

You can sew and the ritual is not over.

Charles took pole today, you can sew, and the ritual is not over.

[To whom God's love commits me here,]

It’s late. It’s late and with the rest of the world asleep you are wide awake, hunched over in a chair, with the red of the Ferrari race suit draped across your legs, and the floor lamp casting a golden glow over your lone figure. You caught a glimpse of yourself in the window earlier, the scene eerily reminiscent of a renaissance painting you saw in the Musée des Beaux-Arts in Nice last year.

Freddy is sleeping at your feet, tired after spending yet another day barking at race cars from the safety of the balcony. The gray hairs around his nose are becoming more and more prominent, a cruel reminder of his upcoming sixth birthday next month. Except for Freddy’s soft snores, the house is quiet, and it almost feels like a sanctuary.

[Ever this day, be at my side,]

Modern Formula One suits don’t have sponsor patches, everything is printed on, and so instead of having to decide which patch to remove, you try to find a piece of thread that matches the yellow of the Ferrari logo. There’s no exact match, everything you have is a slightly different shade, and after a few minutes you give up and take out a bobbin with black thread instead.

It’s been years since you’ve last sewn something but your muscle memory makes feeding the thread through the eye of the needle easy. You pick up the fabric and set to work, using a simple back stitch to sew a cross in the black of the Ferrari horse. No one will even know it’s there, not unless they look closely, and people hardly ever do. It only takes a couple of minutes to finish and once you’re done you run your fingers over the stitches, while you say a quiet prayer.

Careful not to disturb Freddy, you get up then and drape the suit back over the chair, making sure it looks untouched. You leave the light on, it’s almost morning anyway, and make your way back to the bedroom.

Charles stirs when you lay down next to him and when you settle into him you can feel him press a kiss to your forehead, “Lucie is back to sleep?”

For a moment you’re confused, not sure what he means, but then you remember you told him you’d go check on your daughter earlier. You nod and tilt your head back so he can let his lips ghost over yours, “She is. You should be as well, chéri. You’ve got a race to win tomorrow.”

[To light and guard, Rule and guide.]

Charles takes it all in from the top step of the podium, lets his eyes wander over the sea of people below him, the water in Port Hercule glistening in the distance. He can feel his smile growing wider when he finds his family in the cheering crowd - his mom and his brothers looking at him with watery eyes and soft smiles, and her, with their daughter perched on her hip, biting her lip to keep from crying. He wants nothing more than to hug them, hold them close, and celebrate with them, but he knows that will come later, in the quiet hours after the public celebrations, back in the sanctity of their home.

It’s time for the national anthem and so Charles takes his cap off and places his hand over his heart. When his fingers graze over what he quickly realizes is a cross, embroidered onto the Ferrari horse, he has to swallow back tears. He didn’t see it before the race, doubt anyone has, but now that he knows it’s there he never wants to race without it ever again.

The ritual is not over and Charles Leclerc is a Monaco Grand Prix race winner.

#Charles Leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fanfic #f1 fanfic #Harley Sunday x Charles Leclerc

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revenantghost · 9 months

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Kenji Muto's Twitter Posts: Part 1

Before and while Tristamp was airing, Kenji Muto made some amazing Twitter posts giving us lore and production tidbits along the way. And while I don't speak Japanese (so I'm going to have to use Google Translate for this, so take everything you read here with a grain of salt because it may be skewed by mistranslation), there was some fantastic art and really cool concepts shared, and I want to archive anything Trigun-related. If I miss anything, let me know!) It starts a little slow with stuff we already know, but there are some interesting tidbits! If anyone who knows Japanese wants to correct anything, please feel free! Now, without further ado...

Part 1 [here]

Part 2

12:23 AM · Jul 4, 2022

Twitter始めました。 TRIGUN STAMPEDE監督の武藤です。

I started Twitter. This is Muto, director of TRIGUN STAMPEDE.

1:41 AM · Jul 7, 2022

シリーズ長編初監督です。田島光二さんによる美しいコンセプトアートとキャラクター原案をベースに、壮大な世界観を作っています。順次、新しい情報が解禁されるはず。お楽しみに。 #TRIGUN

This is my first time directing a feature-length series. We have created a magnificent worldview based on the beautiful concept art and character designs by Koji Tajima. New information should be released one after another. looking forward to. #TRIGUN

7:27 AM · Aug 3, 2022

公式HPにある花守さんの「依存と執着」という表現は的確だと思った。最も行動原理を組み立てるのに時間のかかったキャラクター、少年ナイ。服に浮かぶ不思議な模様も田島光二氏によるデザイン。果たして、どんな意味が込められているのか。写真は、追加で届いたロサンゼルス土産。 #TRIGUN

I thought that Mr. Hanamori's expression of ``dependence and attachment'' on the official website was accurate. Shonen Nai is the character that took the most time to formulate his behavioral principles. The mysterious patterns that appear on the clothes are also designed by Koji Tajima. What kind of meaning does it really contain? The photo shows an additional souvenir from Los Angeles. #TRIGUN

12:15 AM · Aug 23, 2022

公式のコンセプトアート公開、なぜか少年時代編が多いなぁ。原作漫画で、ナイが奏でている、オルガンのような、ピアノのような楽器。どうゆう感情で弾いているのか、誰を想って弾いているのか。そういえばあのコンセプトアートはいつ公開なのだろう。いつ解禁になるのだろう。 #TRIGUN

For some reason, most of the official concept art released is from the boyhood version. In the original manga, Nai plays an organ-like or piano-like instrument. How do you feel when you play, and who do you have in mind when you play? Come to think of it, when will that concept art be released? When will it be lifted? #TRIGUN

3:42 AM · Aug 31, 2022

出社したら壁にTRIGUN STAMPEDEのポスターが貼られていた。ちなみにお隣のポスターは、初演出デビュー時代からお世話になっている松見真一監督のTVアニメBEASTARS。第二弾ポスターも鋭意製作中。 #TRIGUN

When I arrived at work, there was a TRIGUN STAMPEDE poster on the wall. By the way, the poster next to me is of the TV anime BEASTARS, directed by Shinichi Matsumi, which I have been supporting since its debut. The second poster is also in the works. #TRIGUN

5:43 AM · Sep 4, 2022

演出用に作ってもらったマザーシップの立体造形。絶妙に捻れていて、左右対称でデザインされてるわけではないので、３面図起こしがとにかく難しい。レム・セイブレムは五番艦。大墜落を免れたのは三番艦。日曜出社の私は現在、音響ブース。 #TRIGUN

A three-dimensional model of the mothership made for the performance. It's exquisitely twisted and not designed with left and right symmetry, so it's difficult to draw it from three sides. Rem Saverem is the fifth ship. The third ship survived the crash. I come to work on Sunday and am currently working in the sound booth. #TRIGUN

11:10 PM · Sep 13, 2022

相手に説明することで、アタマの中が整理されてゆく。感覚を理屈に落とし込む、言語化って大切。雑誌の対談取材、刺激になるので今後も積極的に行いたい。でも、想定外の質問やアドリブ対応は苦手だったりする。 #TRIGUN

By explaining things to the other person, your mind will be organized. It is important to translate feelings into logic and verbalize them. I would like to continue doing interview interviews for magazines, as they are very stimulating. However, I am not good at handling unexpected questions and improvisation. #TRIGUN

12:25 AM · Oct 17, 2022

ようやくお披露目です。セルルックのCGで作ったポスター第二弾、見た目以上に手間かかってます。まだ名前を公表できない敏腕スタッフたちが、陰ながら活躍してくれました。よく見ると本編内容のヒントが隠されているので、宝探しのように楽しんでほしい。予告編第２弾も解禁です。 #TRIGUN

It's finally unveiled. The second poster made with cell-look CG takes more time than it looks. The talented staff, whose names cannot yet be made public, have been working behind the scenes. If you look closely, there are hidden hints about the main story, so please enjoy it like a treasure hunt. The second trailer has also been released. #TRIGUN

11:01 PM · Nov 8, 2022

ダビングも鋭意進行中。この臨場感、音響効果、ミキシング、そして素晴らしい劇伴音楽。映画館の音響環境で聴いてほしいと思っていたら、なんと先行上映会が開催決定。勝俣さん的に言うと「グルーヴ感がたまらない！」って事なんだと思う。音の力、恐るべし。 #TRIGUN

Dubbing is also in progress. The sense of realism, the sound effects, the mixing, and the wonderful accompaniment music. I wanted to listen to it in the acoustic environment of a movie theater, but it was decided that an advance screening would be held. In Katsumata-san's words, I think it means "the feeling of groove is irresistible!" The power of sound is terrifying. #TRIGUN

4:35 AM · Nov 28, 2022

同じ内容を繰り返し話すことが苦手で、できるだけテーマや内容を掲載誌ごとに変えるようにしている。多角度から見つめると、作品が立体的に見えてくる。今後も順次、裏情報満載の対談記事が発表されるはず。ポスター第三弾も、そろそろ完成予定。 #TRIGUN

I'm not good at repeating the same content over and over again, so I try to vary the themes and content from magazine to magazine as much as possible. When viewed from multiple angles, the work appears three-dimensional. We are sure to continue to publish interview articles full of behind-the-scenes information in the future. The third poster will be completed soon. #TRIGUN

12:02 AM · Dec 5, 2022

不慣れなトークを辛抱強く聴いてくれた、優しいお客様に感謝。優しくも暖かい拍手に救われました。役者さんのように笑いを取りつつ、上手く会話を回せないものか。スタンピードチーム陣からは「場数ですよ」とアドバイスを貰う。場数とやらを踏むためにも、ネクストステージ頑張らねば。 #TRIGUN

Thank you to the kind customers who patiently listened to the unfamiliar talk. I was saved by the gentle and warm applause. Are you unable to carry a conversation while making people laugh like an actor? The Stampede team members advised us, ``It depends on the number of places.'' We have to work hard on the next stage in order to make it to the number of places. #TRIGUN

10:54 PM · Dec 5, 2022

最近、宣伝チームの熱量に圧倒される。現場スタッフとは違う、これまで接点のなかった役職の人々。こうゆう縁の下の力持ちがいるから作品が広まるんだなぁ。彼らと飲みに行ったりすると、その人柄にも触れる事ができる。集団戦、集団作業、集団芸術。つくづく学びの多いプロジェクトだ。 #TRIGUN

Lately, I've been overwhelmed by the enthusiasm of the advertising team. People in positions that are different from the field staff and with whom I had no previous contact. It's because of these unsung heroes that my work spreads. When you go out for drinks with them, you can get a feel for their personalities. Group warfare, group work, group art. It's a project with a lot to learn. #TRIGUN

12:30 AM · Dec 22, 2022

新宿アドストリートな��にTRIGUN STAMPEDE看板が多数��るらしい。今後も何やら宣伝チームが面白い事を計画中らしいが、なんだろう、とても楽しみ。何気ない風景の裏にも、陰ながら頑張っている人たちがいる。そうやって作品は更に広がってゆくのだ。ブラボー。 https://youtu.be/oolZJKslJcU #TRIGUN

There seem to be many TRIGUN STAMPEDE signboards on Shinjuku Ad Street and elsewhere. It seems like the advertising team is planning some interesting things in the future, but I'm really looking forward to it. Behind the scenes, there are people working hard behind the scenes. In this way, the work will continue to expand. Bravo. https://youtu.be/oolZJKslJcU #TRIGUN

[Boo, dead Youtube link ):< If anyone knows what it was, let me know and I'll insert that info here]

3:21 AM · Dec 28, 2022

いつの間に、誰かが作ってくれたTRIGUN STAMPEDE年賀状を受け取る。カメラ目線で素朴に座るスタンピード。真摯に作品と向き合っている、そんな現場スタッフの姿勢を感じる一枚。物語終盤のダビング（ファイナルミックス）に追われている、ラストスパートの2022。 #TRIGUN

Before I knew it, I received a TRIGUN STAMPEDE New Year's card that someone had made for me. Stampede simply sits looking at the camera. This photo shows the attitude of the on-site staff as they approach the work with sincerity. 2022 is the last spurt of dubbing (final mix) at the end of the story. #TRIGUN

6:37 AM · Jan 4, 2023

喫茶店で水出しコーヒーを眺めているとTRIGUN STAMPEDEを連想する。見た目は変化すれど、ちゃんと豆の成分と香りが活きている。内藤先生という豆を炒って、挽いて、一滴一滴丁寧に抽出する。とびきり今風のコーヒーカップに注いで、さあ召し上がれ。 2023年もどうぞ宜しくお願いします。 #TRIGUN

When I look at cold brew coffee at a coffee shop, I think of TRIGUN STAMPEDE. Although the appearance may change, the ingredients and aroma of the beans are still present. The beans called Naito Sensei are roasted, ground, and carefully extracted drop by drop. Pour into a super modern coffee cup and enjoy. We look forward to your continued support in 2023. #TRIGUN

9:13 AM · Jan 7, 2023

本日からTRIGUN STAMPEDE放映スタートです。第1話「NOMAN'S LAND」いろんな思いを、ガツンと込めました。どうぞ、よろしくお願いします！ #TRIGUN

TRIGUN STAMPEDE will start airing from today. Episode 1 "NOMAN'S LAND" I put all my thoughts into it. Nice to meet you! #TRIGUN

12:37 AM · Jan 9, 2023

シリーズ脚本の第一話、第二話、第三話は、ホップ・ステップ・ジャンプだと思う。まるで、週刊誌の連載ネーム。 #TRIGUN

The first, second and third episodes of the series script are I think it's hop step jump. It's like the name of a weekly magazine serial. #TRIGUN

12:49 AM · Jan 9, 2023

ただのモブからサブキャラへ異例の昇格を果たした愛すべき悪役、チャック・リー隊長。コンテ描いてると、キャラが勝手に動き出す。シナリオに無い台詞を話し始めたり、暴れたり。杉田智和さんの怪演が光る。 #TRIGUN

Captain Chuck Lee is a lovable villain who has achieved an unusual promotion from just a mob to a side character. As I draw the storyboards, the characters start moving on their own. He starts speaking lines that aren't in the scenario, or gets violent. Tomokazu Sugita's mysterious performance shines. #TRIGUN

10:56 PM · Jan 10, 2023

最初期の頃、内藤先生と飲みながら、「手触り感を大切にしたい」「実存感を大切にしたい」ひたすらそんな事を話していた。惑星の空気感と生活感を見事に再現。宝石の国の頃からのタッグ、金子雄司の美術世界。 #TRIGUN

In the early days, while drinking with Mr. Naito, “I want to value the feel of touch.” “I want to value a sense of existence.” That's what I was talking about all the time. The atmosphere and lifestyle of the planet are beautifully reproduced. A tag team from the days of Land of the Lustrous, Yuji Kaneko's art world. #TRIGUN

7:06 AM · Jan 11, 2023

生まれも育ちも第三都市ジュライ。親の七光りで憲兵隊士官学校に裏口入学。金ピカの銃は両親からの入学祝い。画面の外にも彼らの世界は広がり、本編では描かれない彼らの物語もある。チャック・リー再登場に乞うご期待。 #TRIGUN #杉田智和

Born and raised in the third city of July. With the help of his parents, he entered the military police academy through the back door. The golden gun was a gift from his parents for entering school. Their world expands beyond the screen, and there are also stories about them that are not depicted in the main story. Look forward to Chuck Lee's reappearance. #TRIGUN #杉田智和

9:12 PM · Jan 13, 2023

親子の絆に、善も悪もないんだよね。どストレート、どシンプルなテーマで挑む、第二話。ポップ（？）キュート（？）な悪役たちにも注目。本日23:00〜、よろしくお願いします！ #TRIGUN #トライガン

There is no good or bad in the bond between parent and child. The second episode takes on the challenge of a straight, simple theme. Also pay attention to the pop (?) cute (?) villains. Thank you for your support today from 23:00! #TRIGUN #トライガン

9:12 PM · Jan 14, 2023

二話の絵コンテの修正していたら、ふと声が聞こえた… 『ゴフセフ』「え？いま喋った？」『ゴフセフ…(頷き)』「そうか、ゴフセフって言いたいんだね？」『ゴフセフ。(ニッコリと)』「ゴフセフ！(ニッコリ)」キャラと対話しながらコンテを描いてゆく。 #TRIGUN #トライガン

When I was revising the storyboard for episode 2, Suddenly I heard a voice... "Gofsef" "Huh? Did you just talk?" “Gofsef…(nods)” “I see, you want to call me Gofsef, right?” “Gofsef. (smiling)” "Gofsef! (smiling)" Draw the storyboard while interacting with the characters. #TRIGUN #トライガン

12:51 AM · Jan 17, 2023

数年ぶりにオキシタケヒコさんに会った。毎回、東京まで呼びつけていた事に気づく。次は僕が大阪へ行きたい、行くべき。大阪でもSTAMPEDEイベントやりたい。大阪で食い倒れしたい。 #TRIGUN

I met Mr. Oxytakehiko for the first time in several years. Every time, I realized that he had called me all the way to Tokyo. Next I want to go to Osaka, I should go. I want to hold a STAMPEDE event in Osaka too. I want to eat all I can in Osaka. #TRIGUN

7:36 AM · Jan 17, 2023

無口で気弱な青年は、やがて過酷な環境に適応し、サイボーグとしての「力」を得る。凶悪犯の仲間入りを果たした青年の名は、ゴフセフ。語られないバックグラウンドを想像すると、世界は更に広がる。 #TRIGUN

The taciturn and timid young man eventually adapts to the harsh environment, Obtain "power" as a cyborg. The name of the young man who has joined the ranks of violent criminals is Gofsef. When you imagine the untold background, The world will expand further. #TRIGUN

8:47 PM · Jan 20, 2023

親子の絆？そんな常識をぶち壊す。血は水よりも濃い、第三話。本日、23:00-テレビ東京他にて放送。是非ご覧ください！ #TRIGUN #トライガン

Parent-child bond? Breaking down that common sense. Blood is thicker than water, episode 3. Broadcast today at 23:00 on TV Tokyo and other channels. Please take a look! #TRIGUN #トライガン

10:53 PM · Jan 23, 2023

ナイというキャラクター性は、一枚のラフスケッチが語ってくれた。渋谷で開催された「内藤泰弘の世界」展。常に優しく微笑む彼。自身に憑依させて、描きだす。 #TRIGUN

The character of Nai is A rough sketch tells the story. "The World of Yasuhiro Naito" exhibition held in Shibuya. He always smiles kindly. Let yourself be possessed and start drawing. #TRIGUN

11:19 PM · Jan 24, 2023

「人間」という種族を一括りに捉える。物事を巨視的にみる。俯瞰した視野で考え、躊躇なく行動する。コンテを描い��いると、僕の中に彼が宿る。一度宿ると、抜けるまでに時間がかかるところが難点。 #TRIGUN #トライガン

The race of "humans" is lumped together. See things macroscopically. Think from a bird's-eye view and act without hesitation. When I draw storyboards, he lives inside me. The problem is that once you get into it, it takes a while to get out. #TRIGUN #トライガン

9:49 PM · Jan 26, 2023

でも、大丈夫。きっと逞しく彼も生き抜いていくのだろう。過酷な環境で、現実を受け入れ、歪な義手を手に入れ、青年に成長した彼を想像してみてほしい。もしかしたらワムズ使いになっているかも。物語世界は、作り手を離れ、更に広がってゆく。 #TRIGUN

But it's okay. I'm sure he will be strong enough to survive. Accepting reality in a harsh environment, Obtaining a distorted prosthetic arm, Imagine him growing into a young man. Maybe he's using Wams. The story world leaves the creator and expands further. #TRIGUN

[Note that this was shared around episode three and the freckles this guy has--a lot of people theorize this is about Tonis]

8:52 PM · Jan 27, 2023

数年ぶりに田島光二さんと食事。シャコやカニやエビを注文。「これは何？」『シャコワムズ！』「これは？」『カニワムズ！』「これ…」『エビワムズ！！』まるで中学生のようなノリ、同窓会のような時間。本日23:00-は4話放映ですね。 #TRIGUN

I had dinner with Koji Tajima for the first time in several years. Ordered mantis shrimp, crab, and shrimp. "what is this?" “Shakowams! ” "this is?" “Caniwams! ” "this…" “Ebiwams! ! ” Feeling like a junior high school student, A time like a class reunion. Episode 4 will be aired today from 23:00. #TRIGUN

12:17 AM · Jan 29, 2023

見覚えのあるシルエット。モーションキャプチャーには重くて使えなかったが、ポージング参考で大活躍した模造品。実際はもっと重いんだろうなぁ、と想像しながら演出する。外装はロストテクノロジィ、内部は機関銃という合成兵器。 ”パニッシュメント”とは”処罰”の意味。 #TRIGUN #トライガン

A familiar silhouette. Although it was too heavy to use for motion capture, this imitation was very useful as a pose reference. I imagine it's probably heavier in reality when I direct it. The exterior is lost technology, and the interior is a synthetic weapon called a machine gun. "Punishment" means "punishment". #TRIGUN #トライガン

#Trigun #Tristamp #Trigun Stampede #Trigun Meta #Kenji Muto #Food

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ewanmitchelll · 9 months

Text

Imagine Taylor Swift’s songs (VII): I Don’t Wanna Live Forever.

Imagine Aemond Targaryen defies you to play truth and dare…

Warnings: explicit smut, drama, fluff…

***

Been sitting eyes wide open behind these four walls, hoping you'd call. It's just a cruel existence like there's no point hoping at all

You are a noble lady of House Tyrell sent to serve Queen Helaena and thus find a good match. In the meantime you are good friends with the queen and her brothers, especially with Lord Aemond, whom you have a particular fondness to.

And though discreet you are, since he started courting Lady Alys, notwithstanding the general disapproving, he sensed you stepped away. Because it’s you, he looks after you.

Finding you thus in the gardens, Aemond approaches you carefully—although not without noticing your features, the colour that paints your locks and the smooth skin seen in delicate cleavage, reinforced in a soft shade of green gown that you dress.

How pretty you are, my lady.

A thought that he does not voice, though.

"I have missed your company, dear Y/Nickname", his husky voice comes out loud.

"Oh have you now?", you answer, pretending to be busy smelling roses nearby.

“Yes”, he frowns when seeing you are not giving him any attention. “Why does it come out as surprise for my lady?”

Despite his bad reputation, his words betray it when coming so softly to your ears. And they always have had some effect in you. To your dismay, even now they do.

You feel that same aching in your legs you’ve struggled to suppress in the past four years since you’ve arrived at court and… discovered how attractive is Lord Aemond. But you’d hope you masked well for he never mentioned it, even though he is more than aware of your sentiments towards him.

Perhaps this is why he’s coming after you, detesting to see how cold you’ve grown to him.

“Because”, you turn in careful moves, always vigilante with your sentiments, “you have been busy, my lord, and this is not my place to expect otherwise.”

Aemond throws his hands up in the air, impatience getting the best of him.

“Is this what we’ve become now? Strangers to each other?”

You cast him a hurt glance and it’s when he has a glimpse of your broken heart. Aemond regrets his impulsive tongue and shortens the distance by taking your wrists gently and making you look at him.

“Y/Nickname”, his throat tightens when his eyes scan your soul, denuding it in such a way that a shiver runs over your spine.

Baby, baby, I feel crazy, up all night, all night and every day. Give me something, oh, but you say nothing. What is happening to me?

You look at him in silence, but then you divert your gaze away. Aemond watches, stunned, as you recompose yourself.

“I should best find my way, lord.”

“No, I shall not permit it.” He then raises your chin delicately. “May I meet you after dinner?”

“What for?”

“I want to apologize for my errors”, his fingertips slide to your cheeks, and a small smirk twirls on his lips when spotting a light shade of red coloring your cheeks. “Please, lady.”

You should not deny him easy access, but this is no ordinary man. A thief is what he is, having stolen your heart.

“Lady”, he almost begs when seeing a struggle behind your eyes. “Have you forgotten our friendship?”

“Nay, lord, but you apparently have.”

He takes your hands again and there presses a kiss each. You see pain in his good eye and this bends you to his will—like always.

“I shall forsake my good sense if you let me see you one more time.”

“Fine”, and then for your good sense. “Midnight. At my privy chambers.”

You turn quickly so he doesn’t see your face going bright red or even read the distrust in your eyes. You miss, however, the sincere smile that spreads shyly upon his lips and the love that replaces agony. Aemond knows now his heart has found it’s one true home…

And Alys’s name is not one thought nor ever to be spoken again. But you don’t know that yet…

***

I don't wanna live forever, 'cause I know I'll be living in vain. And I don't wanna fit wherever. I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home in vain…

Aemond’s eye is glued in you. Following discreetly behind Queen Helaena, you believe you are not getting anyone’s attention. You dress in red, but you cannot imagine you are the rogue prince’s target.

You barely know as you delicately sit in shadows that under his thoughts you are denuded, calling his name as he loves you right. Unbeknownst to you, Aemond has so many ideas involving you. He wants to kiss you passionately, he wants to make you his.

He hates how long he’s wasted your time and his… Looking for glory and creating his own story, he forgot the light of his world. You, the rose of his garden; you, whose motto is growing strong; you, who even now in shadows, shine brighter than anyone.

As you are encouraged to dance with other ladies, Aemond follows you with his longing gaze. He can tell you are avoiding him, acting nonchalantly when in truth a small smirk in your lips betrays you.

A deadly game it is, you should know. And when you raise your eyes, meeting his purple good gaze, that old aching raises to your belly and weakens your knees.

And it’s when an invisible spark ties you to him.

I'm sitting eyes wide open and I got one thing stuck in my mind. Wondering if I dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life. Baby, baby, I feel crazy, up all night, all night and every day. I gave you something, but you gave me nothing. What is happening to me?

***

Midnight.

Punctually, Aemond knocks at your door. And when you open it, he sees how nervous you are even though you believe you are not showing it. Your hair is tied in old fashion and your green gown is still on your body.

“Lord”, you greet him with a proper curtsy. “Welcome.”

He takes your hand and there kisses it, eyeing you intently as if he is looking for something behind it. Only then he closes the door. Silently, he follows you to the table close to the fireplace, where you offer him a glass of wine.

“Lady”, Aemond smiles at you. “Looking gorgeous as always.”

You pretend to occupy your gaze with the glass you take to your lips.

“Thank you, but I am unworthy of your praise.”

“How come?”, he asks you, waiting anxiously for your eyes to meet his.

Another sip.

“I am nothing like her”.

And there I go. Taken by my insecurities.

“No”, he agrees calmly. “You are a rose found in noble places.”

Silence comes when you don’t expect to hear such compliment. Aemond reclines back in the chair, pleased to make you blush.

“Since you are quiet this day, I thought we could play that game we played as children”, he smirks.

“What game?”, you cast him a suspicious gaze.

“Truth or dare”, Aemond takes a sip of his gaze. “Like old days, my dear.”

You shuffle uncomfortably in your seat.

“I do not think it is wise to play it when we are both drinking wine.”

Aemond chuckles quietly. You know you don’t trust yourself so close to him and to worse, he knows it well.

“Are you afraid of me, my dear Y/N?”

“Not really, no”, but you answer him more nervously than you’d like. “I mean…”

He then takes your hand and holds it gently. You like the contrast of your warm skin to his cold one.

“I am prepared for the thorns”, Aemond smiles sincerely. “Do you honestly take me as Aegon?”

“No”, and here you calm yourself. “Fine, let us begin.”

“I start”, and he smirks at you. “Truth or dare?”

To his disappointment, you choose truth. But to your consternation, he asks you crudely that question you thought you’d never hear.

“Do you love me, lady Y/N?”

Your eyes go wide and you nearly choke with wine. Aemond is amused by how red your face goes and this isn’t the wine speaking. You take a long sip, trying to elaborate a getaway response, but Aemond is staring at you in a way that lying is only trapping you further.

“I… Why’d you think so?”

“For questions, if I remember your rules well, only answers like yes or not are valid”, the prince laughs heartily as you frown at him.

“That is not funny, Aemond. We were children then!”

“But they remain valid! And we are not children anymore, thankfully”, to prove his point he raises his glass. “Well?”

Unwillingly, and completely red, you say:

“Yes.”

One more sip and you avoid his gaze. Aemond, however, is not letting go of your hand.

“Your turn”, he asks you, amused.

“Truth or dare?”

“Truth”, Aemond smirks.

You sigh heavily.

“Very well… Has Lady Alys been the first woman you slept with?”

Aemond laughs at your question and when seeing a dark shade of red in your face, he gently leans closer to stroke your cheek.

“You are very adorable when jealous, my lady.”

“Just answer the bloody question”, you grumble, hating the vulnerability.

“Fine. No.”

“No?”

“No. And you can’t ask me other questions, remember?”

You roll your eyes, but eventually cede a smile.

“Your turn.”

Aemond asks you the same question before. This time you know you ought to choose a different option. Therefore you come up with “dare”.

“I dare you to kiss me”, Aemond smirks.

You stand in protest.

“I shall defend my honor, lord. Who do you take me for? Are you here to play with my feelings?”

He too stands.

“We have played it before. We have been great friends too. Come now, have I ever disrespected you?”

“No”, you hesitate still. “But…”

Aemond places his hands around your waist, patiently waiting.

“Trust in me, Y/N. Do not overthink.”

You have so many arguments, Aemond knows it. But to your surprise—and so his—, you decide to obey. Wherever this is leading you, you opt not to think too much. It’s not as if your elder sisters had not done it…

And so you kiss his lips. Aemond sighs in content when tasting yours against his. It should be just like this, innocent and all, but the silver haired prince wants more. Slowly and respectfully his tongue snakes into your mouth and searches for yours.

In other circumstances you’d have panicked. But you are not a young lady anymore. A damsel you may be, but this is the knight of your dreams. And you feign some experience when cupping his face with your hands and following the rhythm he dictates.

Aemond is somewhat surprised by how good your kiss is, and he wonders if you are indeed that innocent you claim to be. And as it gets more passionate, the prince is surprised by being so captivated by you… Your touch in his face, your fingers gripping his hair, all of which gets him aroused.

Remembering the game is still on, though, he parts it briefly.

“My Gods”, he speaks breathlessly. “You surely are hiding a lot there.”

You smirk at him.

“It appears you know nothing of me, lord.”

He furrows his eyebrows.

“How should I understand that?”

You shrug your shoulders, not willing to share any secrets you might or might not have.

“Truth or dare?”, you ask as you sip one more gulp of wine.

“Dare.”

“I dare you to take off your clothes”, you smirk.

Aemond raises his eyebrows.

“Aren’t you bold?”

“Every rose has its thorn”, you giggle.

But neither parts the gaze when he does as asked. Aemond hates that your wide-eyed gaze affects him so.

“I hope this is no vindictive game whatsoever”, he grumbles under his breath, noticing how you seem to rub your leg into the other, a sight that only makes him further rigid.

You roll your eyes, refusing to answer such comment. You sip your wine, back at the chair now, enjoying the view of this silver prince… until you are surprised by his… well, state.

“Have you never seen one before?”, Aemond inquires at your subtle shyness when watching his member full erect. “Should I…?” he asks, suddenly awkward for misjudging you.

“I have not”, you admit, perhaps more leaded by the wine than otherwise. “But don’t keep it away from me. I…. I like it.”

Aemond feels a strange fever take possess of his body and it doesn’t come from his flame.

“Then I dare you to touch me.” The idea makes him further rigid, and it aches him in ways he never judged possible to feel.

You hesitate, but one more sip and the hesitation leaves you. He is now sitting in your tapestry and you join his side.

“You must guide me”, you whisper hotly in his ear.

Aemond casts you an unreadable look.

“Are you comfortable in doing it?”

Every doubt dies the moment you take the reins of the situation. You watch with a lusty curiosity as you touch his manhood, experiencing it throbbing as a result of your moves.

“Gods”, and he moans so sensually that you feel your nipples going unbearable hard under the cloth of your gown.

“Is it good?”, you ask him anxiously.

“Y-Yes”, Aemond moans louder just as he shows you how to pump it faster. “Go on, Y/Nickname.”

You bite down your lip, obeying as requested. Right under your watchful gaze, Aemond is the victim of his own game. He moans louder, his abdomen goes up and down, his breath goes heavier. You know you should stop right there, but you want to see where this will take you.

It doesn’t take a lot more before a white liquid runs into your hands, nearly ruining your gown. Aemond throws his back to the floor, and something about him collapsing like that makes you wet and fervent in your feminine parts.

“My love, you did a fantastic job”, he smiles so sweetly at you, that you cannot help but smile back. “Why is your hair still tied? I want to see it loose.”

“Let me clean my hands first”, you giggle as you stand and head to the quarters that serve as some sort of bathroom.

Once you go back, you spot Aemond nude still, now sitting in your back. You stand quiet for a moment, reclining against the wall, admiring his features.

He’s so comfortable at your privy chambers, admiring it with his natural curiosity, waiting for you as he finishes his wine. And you cannot look away from his beautiful physique, wishing to be deflowered right here, right now. Your morals can be mended with the moon tea, you decide, untangling your hair.

Sensing someone is observing him, the moment Aemond turns at you, he doesn’t need much to get erect one more time. Your long hair falls like a cascade over your shoulders, falling almost to your knees. There is something about your gaze that has the prince completely on his knees for you.

And oh so he would if you asked…

“Truth or dare, my lord?”

“Dare.”

“Take my clothes off.”

The prince stands, readily to come after you. His hands begin to unlace your heavy gown, but as he does so, he inclines to you, whispering in your ear:

“There is no lady prettier than you. You must be an angel to possess such divinity beauty. And here am I, corrupting you.”

You blush at such wording.

“You are drunk, lord. You know naught what to say.”

“Oh, aye. I do. I want you. So badly…”

And when he turns you at him, you blush at the lust gaze he casts you. Aemond removes your heavy gown, his hands already famine for your body.

“Your breasts…”, he moans, admiringly as he cups each. “Your nipples are already hard. Does my lady know what this means?”

“Nay. What could a damsel know of such matters?”, you tilt your head, waiting for his guidance.

And like a good tutor, Aemond begins to teach you.

“It means that what I feel, you feel too, evidently in different ways because our bodies are different.” He begins to touch the swells of your breasts, each finger eagerly moving to hold it fully. “Fuck. These are good and firm breasts.”

“Do you like what you see?”, you groan at his touch. And you groan louder the moment he plays with your nipples, twirling with his thumbs. “Oh my Gods!”

“Oh yes, I do”, he smirks. “It’s better than I’ve imagined.”

You stare at him in disbelief, finding hard to balance as he touches you slowly. You thus rest your hands over his shoulders.

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ve fucked Alys thinking of you”, Aemond confesses sincerely. “It’s true. I have loved you long before you’ve grown to love me, my lady. You have been the object of my sweetest dreams, the affection of my heart and the aim of my desires. Always wondered what’d be like to have you all to me.”

Part of you doesn’t believe him, but another one wants to. Either way you lean to kiss him passionately, and soon the game is forgotten. You sit on his lap, feeling the tip of his manhood rubbing in your entrance, which arouses you.

“My Gods, I shouldn’t be doing this”, you speak in between kisses, then dragging him to your bed. “But I need you. I need you now, Aemond.”

Somewhere along lines reason has long left you both, and the prince is prompted to align his desires with yours.

“As I need you, my lady”, and that being said his mouth drops to each nipple, making you moan louder this time, all the whilst his fingers find your entrance and there begin to play along. “All wet for me, oh my damsel!”

He hums against your skin, driving you insane. Wine may have its part to blame, but it doesn’t excuse the heavenly sentiment of doing it right—even if it’s morally wrong.

You want him right there, devouring your breasts with his tongue, his skillful hand releasing the pressure in your womanhood.

Until it gets better… and he replaces his fingers with his mouth. His tongue diving inside you brings greatest delights no book is enough to describe. You feel like a sinner, but a sinner redeemed.

“Oh Aemond!”, you want more of him, to selfishly possess him. You want him so bad that…

Every control is lost and Aemond himself feels brought to the seven heavens.

And when he removes the one thing that covers his eye, no words are needed to be said. He crawls over you, spreading your legs further. Seeking for your consent, you kiss him in confirmation.

Moved by wine, instigated by such a deadly game that played with secretive sins, this is not, however, merely lustful desire. When he penetrates you, deflowering you thus, new promises arise.

“I will make you my wife”, Aemond vows when taking your face with his hands. “No man shall touch you, my darling.”

You moan lowly in response, arms wrapped around his neck.

“Don’t make promises you cannot keep”, you whisper against his lips, enjoying the mix of pleasure and pain that comes with his gentle moves.

“I will keep”, he vows under his breath. “I am going to pregnant you woman and show the world you are mine and mine alone.”

To prevent you to protest it, Aemond searches for your lips as you two lock bodies together, moving as one.

In the end, you know, your prince has the best of you… but fruits are only about to grow.

***

• Epilogue

That a sweet rose as yourself has managed to hold tight the untamed heart of the bad reputed Targaryen prince has been the news for the season in Westeros.

Aemond Targaryen, notices a certain chronicler of Aegon II’s reign, has taken as wife Lady Y/N of House Tyrell on the last days of spring following the fifth year of King Aegon, Second of His Name’s reign.

A random courtier, on the other hand, claims that this is no ordinary marriage, but a lustful and loving gaze all made at once. You are described by your beauty and discreet manners, and rumours spread that you became Lord Aemond’s wife after refusing to be his whore.

And whatever happened to Lady Alys Rivers? No one really cares to know. But a minor chronicler suggests that she turned her whoring to Lord Daemon Targaryen. If that is really truthful, no one is bothered to discover it.

In the meantime, Aemond Targaryen takes possession of Dragonstone and there makes it home for you and the new family that comes with your children.

What really is intriguing is that less than eighth months after the wedding, Lady Visenya is born, which raises some eyebrows. But who dares to express this thought out loud?

Not as if you care or Lord Aemond does. You are all too content with the life that so many moons ago both of you desired but neither had the courage to share with each other.

And here you are now, his lady and mother of his children.

#ewan mitchell #aemond targaryen #house of the dragon #aemond targaryen x female reader #aemond targaryen x y/n #house targaryen #aemond targaryen smut #taylor swift #I don’t wanna live forever #zayn

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wildestdreamsblog · 2 years

Text

And I love you, darling

Pairing: Soft!dark Ari Levinson x Reader

Summary: You were just trying to escape your past, and Ari was trying to chase his future.

Warnings: Soft!Dark Ari, Swearing, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, Sexual themes, Breeding kink, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything.

A/N: We reached the end. Official word count for this series: 57kish. Thank you so much for joining me in this crazy ride <33 until next time, my loves..

Masterlist

This love is bad: End

You looked at yourself at the mirror. Your curls artfully falling on one side of your shoulder, your neck adorned with beautiful diamonds your grandmother passed down to you. You had just finished putting on your makeup. You ran your hand on the expanse of your gown. Your waist was highlighted on this dress, the skirt flowing freely. And the color…by heavens did you love the color. The blue hues were something you had never seen. When Ari invited you to a charity event for your third date, he claimed he was going to take care of your dress. And now looking at yourself in the mirror, you knew you weren’t wrong to trust him.

You must admit that you felt like a princess with this breathtaking dress. And with a smile, you twirled in front of the mirror. You thought you were alone, you really did. But when you opened your eyes, your soul nearly left your body when you found Bucky leaning against the wall, his muscular arms crossed in front of his strong chest. He wasn’t wearing his usual smirk- instead, he was genuinely smiling at you. You squinted your eyes playfully at him before offering him your own smile.

“A gentleman would compliment a lady, Bucky,” you informed him dryly.

You saw Bucky’s lips tipped up, shaking his head once before closing the distance between the two of you. “You’re a sight for sore eyes, princess.”

You chuckled as he bowed a little, offering you his manly hand as if asking you for a dance. He angled his head to the side when you comically took your time, before glaring at you. Finally, you put your dainty hand safely on his. You felt his strong hand wrapped around your waist as he led you to a slow dance. And when you complained that there was no music, he started humming Bad Romance of all the songs he could have chosen. You laughed heartily as he twirled your around dramatically. You turned to look at your handsome friend, someone you considered your own brother. From his dark hair, to his blue eyes, to the strong hands that could hurt anyone but chose to protect those he loved instead. You were so lucky to find someone like him in this life, to live in the same time as him, to grow up alongside him. You were feeling immense gratitude to the man who never not took your side since you were young, who courageously informed you when you were in the wrong, who took offense first when someone hurt you before you could even process the hurt, who supported and protected you when you decided to finally live for you.

And you knew, a friend such as him- nay, a brother like him was hard to find.

You looked up at his blue eyes, your hand in his, the other safely resting on his broad back. You offered him your sincerest smile, your emotions bleeding in your eyes.

“Thank you, Bucky,” you murmured, the words weighing all the things he did for you whether you asked for them or not. “I am so grateful that you exist.”

He was silent for a moment, before he nodded his head in acknowledgement. “You know I’d do anything for you, princess.”

“I know,” you started, smiling cheekily at him, “You’re the person I trust most in this world.”

You took a deep breath before you took a step inside the vast and elegant mansion of the billionaire hosting the event. It had been too long since you left this life, and yet, here you were. Funnily though, you didn’t feel like you no longer belonged. It was like yesterday when you last mingled with these people, last wore fancy clothes, and last put on too much makeup that you no longer recognized the person in the mirror. You wondered why you no longer felt like that despite wearing this expensive dress that you were sure cost more than what you earned in the bakery.

You had only taken two steps when you started feeling eyes on you. You should have expected this. After all, you were missing from the scene for years. Being one of the heiresses of a multimillion-dollar business, fiancé to the business mogul, Ari Levinson, and an altruistic person, and all of a sudden, you were back. But the eyes of the people, the stopping of their talks, their full attention on you suddenly started weighing more than you could handled that you started stepping back when you felt a strong hand on your exposed back. You glanced back, and there he was.

There was your Ari.

There was someone who was smiling at you, looking at you as if you were the anchor the kept him from going on the deep ends, as if you were love itself. And then all at once, nothing mattered. Not the hypercritical society, not the choices you made, not the fancy place- all that mattered now was the way he looked at you.

“Hi,” he breathed as he looked intently in your eyes. You looked up at him, truly looked at him. His black tuxedo fitted him well, his hair neatly combed back, his beard trimmed expertly. He looked so handsome, he looked so tall. But above all, he looked like yours.

“Hi,” you murmured, unconsciously leaning closer to him for strength. Ari lifted his hand to you, and with bated breath, he waited for you to hold his hand. And you did, this time without thinking of any reasons as to why you shouldn’t. His lips tilted up ever so slightly, his eyes shone when you reached his hand.

“Are you ready to face the music, darling?”

With him, you found that you were more than ready.

And like a cliché fairytale, he led you in the middle of the room. You and Ari danced to the slow music of the live band. You were never far from him because he always made sure that he was touching a part of you. Maybe this was what people were describing in the novels and in songs, in movies and in series, maybe this was what they were trying so hard to depict in the paintings- the moment when others faded to the background because here was the person that only mattered. You felt the warmth as he twirled you, as he rested his large hand on the small of your back, as he kissed your palm. You felt this unrestrained unhappiness as he took you in his muscular arms, as he rested his cheek on the side of your head, as he swayed you to the music.

You felt the love you were trying so hard to not feel.

You remembered the time you realized you had already fell so hard, so fast, that you only had limited time to brace for the impact as you fell. It was a combination of all the little things that made you fell. Years later, you realized true love did not happen in a blink of an eye. It wasn’t an instant kind of love. Well, at least for you it wasn’t. Your version of love happened because it wasn’t supposed to happen. And you were just too helpless to stop it from happening. Your love happened because of effort, of his kindness, of destiny.

But still, you couldn’t shake off the weight of their eyes on you. Ari looked over your head for a while, noting that indeed people were looking. “Don’t mind them, darling. You’re the only one that matter here to me.”

It did not take long for people to start wanting Ari’s attention. After the dance, businessmen started approaching him. He was only all too happy to introduce you as his woman, and you were only too elated to pinch him in his hard stomach to which he just pulled you to him closer. And finally, someone he introduced to you as his good friend, an elder gentleman, smiled fondly at you before asking Ari to speak in private.

“It’ll just be a moment, sweetheart,” he assured you as he planted a soft kiss on the back of your hand, smiling gently at you before turning his back on you. You watched his broad back as he walked with his friend, genuinely laughing at whatever the man said. His demeanor was so unlike from those other interactions he had with the other businessmen. It somehow amazed you how he could changed the way he interacted with others, and now more than ever that he wasn’t hiding who he was in front of you. Perhaps, what you found to be a horrifying yet a significant thought was that you could now read Ari.

He looked behind to see where you were, and he thought he now accepted that he would always have it in him to check where you were, to make sure you didn’t leave him.

You waved at him a little before deciding on freshening up.

You entered the elegant comfort room, only to find your old, socialite friends chatting among themselves. They were pleasant, really and you enjoyed hanging out with them before. But after being away from this life for years, you felt like you could no longer relate to them anymore. Finally, they turned to look at you with welcoming smile on their faces, their chatters ceased before approaching you.

“Y/N! Oh my god, sweetie! It has been so long!” One of your friends offered her cheek to you, and then the other. You chuckled as the girls surrounded you, asking you where you had been, what were you up to, how was your businesses, and ultimately who was Ari to you. It amused you that it took them that long to get around asking what they had been really itching to ask since the moment you entered the room.

Who was he to you?

“He’s my…” you trailed off, thinking of a way to describe the hurricane that he was. Ultimately, you decided to answer truthfully. “He’s my person.”

The girls shared a confused look before turning to you.

“Oh, i-it’s just we’ve been hearing chatters that you’re to be engaged to a French tycoon,” your other friend quipped up, confusion apparent in her face.

“I heard that too from my mother.”

“I think this was only very recent.”

You tilted your head as you listened to your friends. You mind running a mile a minute from the information they were divulging you.

“That’s only gossip,” you chuckled to ease the tension you were feeling. You weren’t naive to know that when there was smoke, there was fire somewhere. And you had a suspicion who lit the fire.

After assuring them that that was merely hearsay, and after promising them that you would see them soon, your friends left the room. Once they left, you took care of your business. You were washing your hands when you heard the door opening. Nothing could have prepared you for what you saw when you looked up in the mirror. You were flabbergasted to see an older version of you.

Your mother reapplied her expensive lipstick on her lips. The shape of her lips were eerily similar to you. From head to toe, no one could deny that you were your mother’s daughter. How could they deny when after all, she taught you how to be her. After what felt like forever, she finally shifted her elegant eyes from the reflection of herself to you.

“Don’t you feel the guilt, my dear?” She pronounced the words with class, her voice even as if she wasn’t talking to her only daughter that she hadn’t seen in years. “Or at the very least, feel the shame?”

“Mother-“

She tilted her head, a nefarious smile painted in her face. “After running from this for years, look where it got you,” she whispered, now turning to fully face you. “Back where you were in the first place.”

You licked your lip, a habit your mother hated. Your lips quivered as you faced her, as you faced the one that should have loved you the most in this life. “I ran because I don’t want to live a life that’s not mine.”

She nodded understandingly, “I know, dear. But you should have also considered your place and responsibility in this family.”

“What family?” You asked with perplexity. “You’re only married to dad in paper. He has another family of his own, my half-sister whose mother in paper is you! I had to raise her because you neglected her and me. I had to raise myself, learn to love myself, because you only looked at me as if I’m a pawn to your game. And my father who only loves my sister isn’t any better! As if it was my mistake that he married for business and not for love. Now tell me, what family? What responsibility when I did everything for this family?” You seethed with tears in your eyes. Finally, you had unloaded the burden you had been feeling since you were born. Finally, you said your piece.

Your mother looked at you in disbelief, “Are you done with the word vomit, my dear?”

With tears falling from your eyes, you watched as she walked near you. Your mother, with emotionless face, wiped the tears from your eyes softly. “Don’t you think I too wanted to be loved?” She murmured, her eyes focused on her task. “Didn’t you think that I too tried to escape this fate?” Your mother smiled as if she was reminiscing her past. “Love is a fleeting feeling, my dear. At the end of the day, what matters most is stability. Wealth. Respect from the society.” She smiled at you before fixing your hair.

“No matter how much you try to resist, you’ll end up like me. With a man like him, you’re going to end up being the most powerful woman in this society. You have to choose where you derive your happiness… after all, a man like him doesn’t know how to love only one woman. Look at where you are now, back where you started. You’re never going to escape this fate.”

And it hit you right where it hurt the most. You were trying too hard not to think of how all your hard work, your perseverance, your effort were eventually all for naught. She was right. At the end of the day, you couldn’t escape this fate because you chose not to. At the end of the day, you were merely their puppet.

Perhaps, it pained you because it was true. And you wanted it not to be. You could feel the walls closing in on you, could feel the heavy beating of your chest. You couldn’t breathe.

You felt stupid. You felt foolish.

What must other people thought of you? That you couldn’t handle the real world that was why you came back? That you were too sheltered, too weak to live on your own? That life was too difficult that you ran back to your rich parents?

You needed to leave.

With a hurried steps, you opened the door with trepidation, only to find him standing on the other side of the door.

“Sweetheart, there you are. I worried you-“ Ari trailed off once he got a good look at your melancholic face, your eyes brimming with unrestrained tears. “What happened?” He asked in a hard voice.

You shook your head before attempting to walk past him when he took hold of your wrist, preventing you from leaving him. “Darling, what happened? Where are you going?”

You didn’t think. You just wanted to leave. And perhaps, you should have thought of what you said numerous times before you said it to him. “This is over. Our three dates are up.”

Ari looked astonished, yet his hold on you didn’t loosen. Instead, he pulled you closer and looked down on you with confusion and hurt in his eyes. “I don’t understand. I thought we were making progress…I-I thought you love me-“

Your mother decided it was the right time to reveal herself. Ari looked up, recognition in his eyes before slowly turning to you. “What did she say?”

“The truth. I’m sorry. I can’t do this-“

“So that’s it,” he whispered to himself, before nodding. He laughed humorlessly, “One word from someone else and you go running away from me.”

“Ari-“

“Does what I have to say mean so little to you? Do I mean nothing to you that you can just leave me?”

You gulped as you looked at him. He squeezed his eyes shut. Looking back, what perhaps surprised you the most was that he let go of your hand.

“Y/n…I’m only human. I get tired, too,” he uttered, his eyes staring intently at you. And when you said nothing, because really, there was nothing more to say. Finally, when all he heard from you was nothing, he walked away.

It was a month later when your mother gave you a call, ordering you to show up or else it was going to be your little sister who would marry the French tycoon she wanted you to marry. You almost laughed from her predictability. You knew it was her who started the fire. You had tried hard to get your sister out of her grasps, but she refused.

Even though you shared a childhood with her, you two were raised by different yet same parents. Her father loved her, he cherished her. Your father tolerated you.

To your sister, your parents, especially your father were just doing what they thought was best for you.

But you knew they only used you to strengthen their place in the society…regardless if you were happy or not.

Despite the fact that your heart broke and was still breaking to million pieces, you were left with no choice. You met the handsome gentleman one day. His name was Timothy. You found him to be kind, humorous even. He made you laughed. At the back of your mind, you remembered how much Ari made you laughed as well… how much he made you happy. Then you met Timothy again for a much less formal setting. He was charming, and he wasn’t out of touched from reality of the world. He was a family man, telling you tales of his childhood with his loving parents. When you asked him why he was in this arranged marriage, he explained that he believed love could be learned because that was what happened in his parents.

You didn’t say anything after that because you were certain there was no love after Ari.

It shouldn’t surprised you to find several photos of you and Timothy on the news after meeting him. In all the photographs, you were laughing and he looked at you with warmth in his face.

You were back in your own penthouse, no longer living with Bucky. But as a condition to the arrange marriage, you demanded that Bucky be back in your service. You noticed Bucky was becoming more and more withdrawn from you these past days. When you asked him if he was having any difficulty, he assured you that he was okay.

Yet, you noticed he was acting strange.

On the day you were set to meet Timothy’s parents, Bucky smiled at you faintly. Always on the dot, your trusty bodyguard led you downstairs to the waiting car. You looked at him as he closed the door of the car before starting to merge to the traffic.

“Bucky?”

“Yes, princess?” He asked in his monotonous voice. You met his eyes over the rearview mirror.

“You’ll tell me if something’s wrong, right?” You asked him once again, showing concern over the fact that you felt like he wasn’t himself for days.

It took him a moment to answer you that you thought he would ignore you. Eventually, he flashed you his reassuring smile over the mirror, “Don’t worry, princess. Everything will be okay.”

You only nodded, yet somehow unconvinced before focusing on your phone. You were back to your rightful place, arranging charities and running some of the businesses your father entrusted you to. It was awhile before you looked up, only to be confused when you saw that you were no longer in the city…. No. This was a familiar place. This was the way to that town.

“Bucky?” You called him, your head turning to the other side to make sure that you were going to the direction you never thought you’d return to. Trees were blurring as the car sped up, the absence of the buildings and the vast empty farm land were making you tense. “Bucky, are we lost?”

His jaw clenched, his grip on the steering wheel tightened as he listened to your voice that was turning from confusion to agitation. He hated breaking your trust. But he couldn’t lose her.

“Bucky, please,” you tried again when he made a turn to the town’s church. “What are you doing, Bucky?!”

“I’m sorry, princess,” he atoned. This wasn’t easy for him. But Ari left him with nothing to do but to betray you. “Ari said if he didn’t have you, he’d marry your sister.”

“What?! Then why didn’t you tell me?”

“He said your family owed him a bride, that he’d do everything to destroy your family’s legacy and marry your sister if you married someone else. I’m sorry,” he confessed as he stopped in front of the small church. Your eyes quivered when you looked at the church. It was decorated with your favorite flowers, with your preferred colors. This was like a dream…and your personal nightmare. Bucky opened your door, regret and certainty battling in his eyes. You knew that even if you begged, even if you cried, Bucky wouldn’t take you back.

He loved your sister.

And you knew, when it came to the person who had his heart, Bucky would betray anyone…including you.

You didn’t take his hand, and instead, stepped out of the car with dignity. He looked at you with apologies in his eyes, and you looked at him with dagger in yours. He couldn’t hide the way he winced even if he tried. Never in your wildest dreams did you ever think that Bucky would be the one to double-cross you, yet here you were. You started walking to the church with Bucky trailing behind you.

And there was your sister, the only person who loved you in your family. There she was, with tears streaming down her face, and beside her was the devious man who loved you just a tad bit too much.

Your sister ran to you, and you hugged her with all your might. Combing her hair as she sobbed on your shoulder, apologizing to you over and over again.

But didn’t she know?

It was okay.

You’d do anything for her.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry-“

“You have nothing to apologize for, silly!” You admonished her with a smile on your face. You cupped both her cheeks to get her to listen to you. “Nothing is your fault, okay? It’s okay. I’m okay.”

“But if it wasn’t for me, you won’t have to do this.”

You looked up over her head to see Ari staring intensely at you, his face void of any emotion. But his eyes held unrestrained heat and something akin to a promise. And looking at him, you knew this would happen eventually. There was no getting out of this, no escaping a man such as him. If he was ruthless in his business, he was even more brutal in love. Your eye contact was hindered by Bucky’s marching form.

Bucky went toe to toe with Ari, his eyes murderous as he looked at Ari’s unemotional one. And without any preamble, he lifted his gun to Ari, the cold barrel of the gun touching Ari’s forehead.

Yet, never once did he flinch.

“Hurt her and the next time you look at the end of the barrel will be your last sight of this world,” Bucky threatened coldly, his voice steady and his eyes cold.

Ari lifted his chin even more, uncaring that his life was being threatened. What for when he was living like a deadman when he let you walked away? He thought he could let you live your life away from him. He thought he could let you marry someone else. He thought he could survive without you. Alas, he was wrong.

You should have known better than to feed a starving wolf and expect it to not to come back again and again and again.

“If I hurt her, you have my permission to end my miserable life.”

And Bucky knew Ari wasn’t bluffing. If he had any ounce of uncertainty in Ari’s love for you, he would never have done this. But his instinct never strayed him in the wrong direction. He was more than sure that this man, this obsessive man, loved you more than anything and anyone in this world.

But who was he to talk when he was planning the same thing with your sister?

Who was he to talk when the mere thought of losing your sister sent him to the very edge of his sanity?

Who was he to talk when he betrayed you just so he wouldn’t lose her?

Bucky certainly did not have the high ground at the moment.

With one last dark look, he marched back to where you and his love was standing. You looked at him with coldness in your eyes, and your sister looked at him with betrayal in hers.

“Take her away from here,” you whispered, not wanting your sister to be present and blame herself for whatever was to happen.

Your sister blinked at you owlishly, her eyes wide as what you said dawned on her. She gripped your forearms, willing you to look at her. “W-what? No! I’m staying with you! I’m not going to leave you with him-“

You looked at Bucky and gestured for him to take your sister away. And he did. With gentle strength, he wrapped his arms around your sister who fought with all her might, calmly taking your distressed sister away from you.

“It’s okay,” you assured her again, squeezing her hand once before letting it go completely. “I’ll see you soon, okay? I promise. It’s going to be okay.”

You noted, minutes later as you looked at the readied white dress in the room of the church, that this was not a spur of a moment. No, this was planned by Ari. The dress was exactly your size. This was a magnificent dress, you thought, too bad you were being forced to it.

The door opened and when you looked behind you, there was Molly.

You rushed to her, holding her dainty hands in yours, “Molly, you have to help me,” you implored her as she looked at you somberly.

She tapped your hand twice before leading you back inside. She proceeded on fixing your veil, smoothing her hands over the crease on your dress. “Molly, Ari is unhinged. He’s insane-“

“How many people need to suffer before you come back to him?” She asked quietly, handing you the bouquet of flowers you failed to notice in her hand. With great reluctance and confusion, you took hold of the flowers. They were beautiful, yet this situation made you unable to appreciate any of the beauty around you.

“Molly-“

“You’re suffering, too. Stop punishing Ari for something he had no control of. Stop punishing yourself for loving the man. Life is too short, dear. This love is something people look for. You have it. Now, is your pain and what other people have to say greater than your love?”

You paused, you could see now more than ever that she wouldn’t understand. To her, Ari was the hero. You knew she had some valid points, but this whole fiasco was Ari’s idea. She could not and should not separate the fact that Ari was also the villain, that he too was capable of being manipulative.

Molly smiled sadly at you as she covered your despondent face with the veil. “You are the only one that can humanize him, dear. I’m sorry.”

You were too.

Ari was waiting for you at the end of the aisle, beside him was the town’s priest. The church was almost empty, saved for Molly and Pablo, and the little band. The decorations were grand, evident by the fact that Ari spared no expense.

You took one step and the band started playing a harmonious song, the violin and the piano blending well together as they played. You held your head high as you marched slowly, the bouquet of flowers you were holding helped you to hide the fact that you didn’t feel as brave as you were pretending to be. All the while you were walking, Ari never once took his eyes off of you.

And you didn’t, too.

It was bittersweet how you dreamed of marrying him once upon a time. And now it was happening when it shouldn’t happen. The moment you were within reach, Ari offered you his muscular arm. You took it without looking at him.

The whole ceremony was blurred to you. You were only snapped out of it when you heard the priest asked you if you agreed to be Ari’s wife. You heard yourself say ‘I do’ with no emotions at all. Ari held your hand and placed two rings on you, the first one was what was supposed to be an engagement ring. The diamond looked elegant, something that was not too loud. It was beautiful. The second one was a simple white gold band that symbolized your agreement that from now on, you were his wife.

You felt your heart break. This was supposed to be the happiest day of your life. You were marrying the man you loved. But it shouldn’t be like this. None of it should be like this.

Ari’s voice was strong as he recited his very own vow, your hand in his as he looked at you. “From now on, everything that I do is solely to make you happy. I promise to be better each day as long as you’re beside me. I promise that you’ll forever have my heart. I promise to love you for who you are, and for who you are yet to become. I promise to be patient and to remember that all things between us are rooted in love. I promise to always give you a part of my food. I promise to share my whole heart with you and to remember to show you how deeply I care for you, no matter the challenges that may come our way. I promise to love you loyally and fiercely—as long as I shall live.”

Your tears finally fell. You could no longer stopped them as he handed you a simple band, and offered you his ring finger.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife,” the priest announced. Ari’s tensed shoulder visibly relaxed, his hold on you softened a little. “You may now kiss the bride.”

With tears in your eyes, Ari lifted you veil. His hand gently cradled your cheek as his lips slowly descended on yours. His kisses were gentle, as if he was asking for forgiveness when you had none to give. Finally, his lips parted from you yet he stayed near you. His forehead touched yours, “Finally, you’re mine Mrs. Levinson.”

Ari was silent as he watched you stew. He knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it in. But still, he found no remorse in what he did. He knew in his very being that you should be with him. Behind all the complications, he knew you and him were meant to be together in this life. Finally, he took a turn to his house in the town. He supposed it was now his and yours. He did like that thought, something that was owned by you and him. You hadn’t looked at him since he tied you to him, never once did you speak to him despite him asking you questions, despite Molly and Pablo congratulating you. You were keeping yourself from him, and he would have none of that.

You watched as he turned to a familiar road. It was where you were the happiest, back when Ari wasn’t like this. You finally turned to look at the man beside you, his strong hands steady on the steering wheel. The band on his ring finger gleaming from the sunlight, something that symbolized the union between the two of you. He turned to look at you, his eyes intense and unapologetic. Ari stopped the car and rounded to open your door, but you beat him to it. You opened the door so hard you wished it slammed in his pretty face, but alas it didn’t. And so you resorted to slamming the door so hard on his expensive car, praying that you at least damaged something in there.

You were huffing as you marched to the front door, whilst Ari took his time on unlocking the door. And once the two of you were inside, it was like your carefully kept facade of calmness shattered.

“Are you hungr-“

“How could you do this?!” You belted, whirling around to face your husband.

“Do you not want to stay here? I figured we’d be happy here. After all, we were happy here…before you started listening to other people,” Ari drawled, his eyes wondering around the house before finally resting on yours. His hand was in his pocket, his stance calm so opposite to what you were feeling.

“You know that’s not what I meant Ari,” you exclaimed, trying to wretch the veil away from you. The only thing it accomplished was to tug on your hair that it hurt. “How could you manipulate the people I love!” You shouted at him, sadness clouding your face. You willed him to understand how fucked-up this all was, how you thought he was beyond redemption. How it saddened you to see him became someone you no longer knew. “How could you do that to Bucky? How could you do that to me?” You whispered the last part, your voice breaking. You could no longer pretend that you had the strength for this. You were drained. You were empty.

Ari sighed before walking closer to you. He calmly and carefully removed the pins securing your veil, taking great caution and patience to avoid hurting you. You looked up to him as he did his task.

“See, everyone else would choose someone else over you. But not me. I’ll always choose you,” Ari stated, his voice calm as if he was discussing the weather and not the devious crime he committed to you.

“This is not how it should be,” you whispered sadly. Today had been too much for you. Nothing could have prepared you to what this day had revealed to you. “And the worst part is that you aren’t even sorry for what you put other people through, for what you put me through.”

Ari walked closer to you. He would admit it if you asked, and it was the truth that he couldn’t stand being apart from you. He wasn’t alive when he left you. He craved you.

He wiped your tears from your eyes lovingly, gently, so gently that it was as though he wasn’t capable of hurting anyone. His voice was low as he confessed, “It was inevitable. We are inevitable. And categorically, I cannot find it in me to regret it.”

You nodded once, before looking up at his soulful eyes. “You will,” you began, tears shimmered your eyes. “You will, one day, when you wake up and realize that I may be here, but you lost me already.”

Ari thought firmly that you would forgive him. He rationalized that you just needed time, that you’d be happy with him again. He excused your despondent actions as something that would fleet one of these days.

But they didn’t.

You were not kidding when you told him honestly that day that he lost you.

Ari tried to do everything. Now that you were beside him, now that he finally tied you to him, he should feel an ounce of peace, right? Except that he didn’t because he knew you were pulling away from him. Or rather, you had already pulled away from him.

He felt like he was living with a ghost of you.

Every night he watched you fall asleep. Every night he traced the frown on your brows, smoothing them as if it could erase your troubles. And only when you were deep in your sleep was he able to gather you in his arms, holding you so tight as if he was terrified he’d wake up one day and see that you were gone.

And come the morning, he’d whispered to you how much he loved you…how much he needed you.

He reckoned that he had to court you again, show you the better parts of him. Because he had finer traits..right? He was more than just the despicable man he was before. So he cooked for you without fail every single day. He found that taking care of you was what he wanted to do for the rest of his life. And everyday, the two of you sat down and ate, with him making small talks, and you disregarding him.

And the childish side of him thought that walking around the house half-naked would elicit an emotion in you- any emotion at all because he was losing his mind. He would even take your anger, just not this facade you were presenting. One morning, he returned from his run. He entered the house with sweat dripping from him, sans the shirt and he caught your eyes roaming his body slowly.

Suddenly, Ari felt hopeful. Until you reached his eyes, squinted, rolled your eyes at him, and turned your back on him. That was the most reaction he got from you in weeks. He did that almost everyday that he was sure he caught bronchitis from walking around shirtless even when it was cold. So he stopped.

Ari thought what you would loved coming with him to the charities, after all you had a philanthropic heart. And you did enjoy. All while talking and playing to the children, you were all smiles. He heard you laughed for the first time in a month, and somehow it both softened and broke his heart.

Were you that unhappy with him?

On some days the two of you went to the market. You and him did all domestic things together, yet somehow there was an immeasurable distance between you and him. Jess came in the house to invite you out when news finally reached her that you were back. Yet what she didn’t know was that it was against your will. He watched as you smiled at Jess, as you fondly hugged her. He wished that you would touched him again.

What he did was to nod dotingly when Jess informed you that she would be taking you for a girl time.

You hardly even looked at Ari as you went away.

It was almost midnight. Ari kept looking at the door, then to his laptop, then to the clock hanging on the wall, then to the door again. He was agitated on the surface, but beneath it all was much worse. If it wasn’t for the text that Isaac sent him that the girls were having fun in Jess and Isaac’s house, then he would be frenzied thinking that you left.

But what was puzzling was the fact that never once did you try to leave.

When the clock hit one in the morning, Ari made up his mind. He would go to you. With a renewed strength, he grabbed his keys and drove to where you were. When Isaac opened the door, he sheepishly scratch the back of his neck. He guided Ari to their backyard facing the ocean where the women were, and only one of them were clearly inebriated. Jess only had a couple of glasses, but she enjoyed talking to her best friend.

Ari sighed before walking to where you were sitting, with your head resting on the wooden table. Your eyes were closed when he neared you. He kneeled down and softly touched your arm, letting you know of his presence.

“Darling?” He called for you softly, always so softly. Something he was learned he was capable of when he started loving you. “Let’s go home.”

It only took a couple of seconds before you opened your eyes. He smiled at you tenderly as he brushed your hair away from your face. “There she is,” he whispered.

Yet, you continued staring at him.

“Ari,” you called for him for the first time in a month that it made his heart beat louder. If you knew how much you affected him, would you still hate him?

“Yes, my wife?”

You looked at him with a sadness in your eyes that it broke whatever was left of his heart. “I love you so much,” you confessed slowly. You blinked and a tear fell from your eye, dampening the wood. “I love you so much that it hurts.”

And at that time he thought, ‘how do you grieve something that is still alive? Why does it hurt being loved by you?’

The drive home was quiet. Between the drive and your arrival to home, you had it in you to sober up. You walked without needing his help, you walked with your head held high. You opened the door of the dark house, quietly waiting for Ari to enter and secure the doors. And once he did, you grabbed his neck and kissed him. You kissed him for all the times you couldn’t. You kissed him for all the love you had the had nowhere else to go. You kissed him for all the pain this love had brought you.

And then he kissed you back.

Ari’s hand encircled your waist, his other hand guiding your jaw closer to him. He kissed you so slow, savoring your touch, your warmth… you. And then kisses turned fervently. His hands roamed your back, your hips, your face as if making up for the lost time. Your wandering hands weren’t any better.

Before you knew it, Ari had led you to the bedroom, gently pushing you on the bed with him following closely, never allowing any space between the two of you. Ari hurriedly took off his shirt before taking off yours. He worshipped you that night like a devotee worshipped his god. He kissed all of you in apologies, in love, in pain. And when you finally whispered that you needed him, he drove straight into you.

“I love you too much,” he confessed as he looked into your eyes.

You paused from brushing his hair tenderly, noting that he knew his love was excessive. “I love you too, Ari. But right now, it kills me to look at you.” Because you couldn’t accept the fact that he had it in him to threaten the ones you loved. Because you couldn’t believe that the gentle person you loved could turn out to be so devious. So manipulative. So unapologetic.

And that night as he watched you sleep, as the sun was starting to rise, he knew what he needed to do. He knew he had to acknowledge the glaring truth in front of him.

Love shouldn’t turn someone into this.

Love should be good.

Hours later, you woke up and you knew Ari had gone. You found a letter on the table.

I saw how unhappy I made you. I tried to fool myself and thought that I could turn this around. But perhaps, what you really needed was time and space. A love that is good. Until I can love you the way you deserved to be love, I will give you space. It’s killing me to see what I turned you into. It kills me to know that I extinguished your fire. But darling, please know that all I did was because I am hopelessly, irrevocably in love with you. You came crashing to my life, literally. And that was the best thing that ever happened to me. I hope one day you can forgive me. I love you. Always.

You found out through your lawyer that Ari Levinson gave you 99.99% control of his shares. You found out that he bestowed to you the numerous charities he was helping. His message was clear, marrying you wasn’t because of business. No.

You looked for him everywhere at first, but you found that for the first time, you could breathe. He was right. You and him needed space. And time. And understanding. You needed to know that you too made mistakes that hurt him. You didn’t know why you stayed in his house when he literally let you go. But a part of you was waiting for him.

And you waited.

You waited until you no longer feel the burning anger.

You waited until you no longer feel the crushing sadness.

You waited until you no longer feel the painstaking betrayal.

And then you waited some more because almost a year had passed and still, Ari was not back.

One day, the news warned you of the strong thunderstorm that would passed by your town this afternoon. The people came by to warn you and to make sure you had everything you needed, from Isaac coming by to tie down anything that could potentially fly during the thunderstorm, to Molly whom you had forgiven, coming by to bring you food to survive the night. You remembered why you had fallen for this town- it was the people.

Evening was nearing and thankfully, the storm wasn’t as powerful as reported to be but still, the thunderstorm terrified you. You were in the living room watching as the rain fell down angrily, the wind making the trees danced. The power had gone out more than an hour ago. You were staring outside when suddenly, you noticed a car driving near the house.

And then without thinking, you ran outside.

The wind was steadily blowing your hair, the storm still at large. The thunder could be the loudest in the world right now, but you heard nothing but the deafening beat of your heart as you looked at him.

As you looked at the love of your life.

Ari was drenched, and it felt like time hadn’t passed. He still looked the same, but you could see the demons in his eyes were now gone. He looked like he was now at peace. But his face was filled with worry as he looked at you.

Your tears blended with the ceaseless drops of rain on your face. You didn’t know why you stepped closer to him, you didn’t know why you ran to him. For the first time since you discovered who he was, you came to him.

And this time, Ari waited for you to come to him.

Your arms surrounded his thick neck, your face buried on his chest as you cried.

“Why did you drive? It’s dangerous and-and. Oh my God, Ari you drove!” You blabbered as you looked up at him. He hugged you tighter, his face on your neck.

“I did, sweetheart,” he answered warmly.

“But you’re terrified of the rain!”

He smiled as he took you in, as he cherished the feeling of holding you unperturbedly. “My fear changed when I started loving you,” he confessed slowly. When he heard the news, it was already late and the storm was already passing by the town. He was panicked when he couldn’t reach you, when the phone just rang and rang. The thought of you being alone, and terrified, made him brave. It made him grabbed his keys and drove.

He found out that nothing was more terrifying than losing you.

You looked up at him only to find him smiling at you, his hand caressing your cheek.

“Ari, I’m sorry-“

He shook his head. “You have nothing to be sorry for, darling. It was my fault. I see it now,” he lowered his forehead on yours. “I miss you. I’m sorry. I love you.”

You sobbed as you listened to him. “I miss you too so much. I love you too so much.”

“Then will you marry me again? This time with our families and friends as witnesses?”

You tipped your toes, grabbed his face and kissed him. “Of course, I will.”

And this time, his and your love was strengthened by all the things you had been through. This time, this love was good.

|End

#ari levinson fic #ari levinson x female reader #ari levinson x y/n #ari levinson x you #soft!dark ari levinson x reader #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson angst #ari levinson #ari levinson au

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bugtastic · 1 year

Note

Please spill the modern au thoughts, I'm hungry for any takes of the characters in a happier setting

i had to edit this cuz i accidentally posted this without a check up first- anyways-

vash is my first victim. >:)

tags: fluff, a little bit of angst on vash's side, gn!reader.

warnings: none i think!

modern!vash, who is unemployed due to his reputation as the "humanoid typhoon". he causes disaster at every job he worked at. broken machines, gadgets, you name it. he was cursed out by his bosses many times. almost the whole city knows about him at this point.

"All you do is bring bad luck everywhere you go!"

modern!vash, who spends his time at your shared home, waiting for you to come home like a pet waiting for its owner.

modern!vash, who feels guilty that he can't lighten the stress off your shoulder. you have been working overtime again, just so you're able to afford a place for you and him.

modern!vash, who feels guilty that he can't lighten the stress off your shoulder. you have been working overtime just to pay the bills and to keep the small apartment you've both been living in. you're struggling and he can see that. he sees it every night when you go to bed and he feels you fall asleep in his arms.

modern!vash, who cleans the house and cooks for you both because of said guilt. you told him many times that it's okay, he doesn't need to clean the whole apartment just for your sake. he is stubborn, let me tell you. he will become the ideal malewife.

modern!vash that decorates the place to feel like home. trinkets he collects from his walks with Meryl and Wolfwood end up somewhere on a shelf. you swear that every day you come back home from work you see a new pebble in the plant vase you gifted vash before you started dating.

modern!vash, who texts the group chat with his friends, asking if anyone has free time for a short walk.

modern!vash, who looks at Wolfwood and Meryl as they bicker once again. Wolfwood pokes Meryl on purpose and he laughs silently to himself. The only thing missing is you. The four of you would be out hanging together. He misses holding your hand when he goes outside. But you're not here because of him.

modern!vash, who cries in your arms when you comfort him. you say you're more than happy to work overtime for both of your sake until he finds a stable job. he can't help but clutch the fabric of your shirt tighter, thinking 'I don't deserve you' and 'How selfish of me'. But now that he has you, you can't help but keep you to himself.

"How selfish of me. But I love you too much to let you go, my Mayfly"

modern!vash, who refuses every job offer his brother gave him. he doesn't associate with him anymore, not after what he did to you and his friends after rem's death. he will accept any other offer, but not Nai's.

modern!vash, who looks at the clock, hearing every tick the clock makes. you were already supposed to be home. it's past 9pm. where are you? did you get in trouble?

modern!vash, who worries and runs to the door, putting his shoes on as he speed dials your number on his phone.

You huff as you carry 2 heavy bags. After work, you went shopping for some supplies to make dinner. Vash has been cooking dinner every single day and the moment you protest and want to cook him, he hushes you and kisses you with a giddy smile on his face. You noticed when he gives small pecks on your lips, he giggles softly to himself.

Ah, if you only saw that smile turn into a small pout the moment you leave for work.

You swore that if he gives you those puppy eyes again, you will fight your inner self and be stubborn. You wanted to make him dinner too after all the hard work he's doing around the apartment. Cleaning and cooking, you're sure it must be tiring at some point for him.

After walking up many stairs you arrive at your door. You put the bags down as you reach for the keys to the apartment in your jacket. As you were about to put the key in its hole, the door suddenly flew open.

Vash stared at you in shock. His phone was to his ear and barely dressed to go outside. Wearing a gray tank top and black shorts are not ideal for going outside at night.

"Vash, what are you doing?" you asked. The blond registers your appearance, the shock fading away and for pure joy to replace it.

"YOU'RE BACK!!!" he picks you up in his arms and hugs you tightly. You yelp as you feel the air in your lungs slowly running out from his death squeeze.

"Where have you been? You were supposed to be here an hour- mmmmf-!" You press your lips to Vash's, successfully shutting him up.

"Stop worrying, I was out shopping. Now put me down, I need to cook dinner." You pat your hand on his shoulder signaling him to put you down. He slowly starts putting you down purposefully, he wants you in his arms juuuust a little longer. You sigh and wrap your arms around him. He feels your arms slowly envelop him. His heart might have just skipped a beat no biggie hahah. "I missed you too Sunshine." you say as you finally feel your feet touch the ground. You look up at Yash and you can tell he's not on earth right now. He's in a daze with a goofy smile on his face. You couldn't help but mess his hair up a bit, ruffling his fluffy blond locks.

He snaps back, finally registering what you said before. "Wait, dinner? But I'm supposed to make you food!" He exclaimed as you took the grocery bags and ran into the apartment before Vash to stop you.

"I'M MAKING DINNER AT THAT'S FINAL VASH! YOU CAN'T STOP ME FROM SPOILING YOU!" you yell down the hallway as you make your way down to the kitchen. Vash dramatically gasps and slams the apartment door shut.

"You have been working all week! You should rest Mayfly, overworking yourself just to make me happy... I don't deserve-" He gasps lightly as you pull him down by the collar of his gray tank top and kissing him. You were going to make the kiss short just to stop him from degrading himself.

That didn't up happening.

Vash hurriedly cupped your face with his hands and desperately pulled you closer to him, deepening the kiss.

He's been waiting all week for you to come home and kiss him properly after all.

You are the first one to break the kiss and take deep breaths. Vash was silently looking at you, just staring at you. His eyes softened as he leaned in for more, only for you to stop him by putting your hand over his mouth.

"This won't stop me from cooking, Vash." You scold him. Truthfully, that wasn't his plan to begin with but he'll use it as an excuse for now to hide his neediness. He laughs a bit, his face painted red.

"Can we cook together at least? Please? Preeeetty pleaseee Maaayfly?" He's giving you those puppy eyes again. You huff. You can't fight against that.

"Fine, let me do the main part at least." you say with a sigh. You can practically see the nonexistent tail wag behind your boyfriend.

"Okay! I'm happy with anything, really, as long as you're with me." Vash picks you up again and sets you on the counter. He goes through the grocery bag to see what you've gotten. His eyes shine brightly as he sees fresh doughnuts you've bought for him. After a while, you two end up talking about your day. He talks about how Wolfwood and Meryl fought as usual as you laugh with him. You can't help but stare Vash as he's talking. His energetic movements when he talks about the simplest things, his bright blue eyes, his smile. You can't get enough of that bright, gorgeous smile.

You think to yourself...

If you were to choose who you could spend your life with, you'd choose Vash Saverem in every universe. No matter who he is.

#meryl stryfe #trigun x reader #vash the stampede #vash the stampede x reader #vash x reader #wolfwood #trigun stampede x reader #vash x you #vash the stampede x you #nicolas d wolfwood #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun #trigun x you

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wen-kexing-apologist · 11 months

Text

The Left Hand of God

OKAY! SO!

I know I said like, literally two days ago that I was as of yet unable to write meta for this show. Because there is so much mystery and we don’t have the answers yet.

BUT!

There are benefits to talking about this show with friends, especially friends who are not watching Shadow, and are only seeing patterns based on what I tell him. Because my dear friend @so-much-yet-to-learn heard about the gay boy (Nai), the boy who was fighting the system (Trin), and the boy who has completely rejected filial piety (Dan) and immediately came up with the theory that the Shadow or, rather, the ghosts that all these boys can see are visible because they are breaking from tradition.

And in conversation with @slayerkitty earlier about the preview for the second half and the trailer for the show, and arms and hands (are we surprised this is where I am going?) I realized a pattern that I hadn’t quite picked up on.

Left Hands.

Now, depending on your level of involvement in religion, you may be more or less aware of where I am going with this. I was not raised religious, I had minimal knowledge of the significance of left hands in religion. But boy oh boy do I now. (If you are better versed in religion than I am, I invite you to please read me for filth and make and let me know what mistakes I made in writing this).

ANYWAY. To sit at the right hand of God is an honor, and there are a few references to sitting at God’s right hand in the Bible. According to Vexen Crabtree, there is a right hand path in religion that is associated with goodness, while the left hand path is considered evil. In certain cultures the left hand is considered to be unclean.

Essentially, the left hand is considered to be Satanic and can be associated with the occult. Why is this important?

How accurate is all of this? Idk, but I’m rolling with it for the sake of the argument!

Because in Shadow almost all of the Shadow and ghost shit happens on the left. In fact, every single injury that occurs in the show (so far) occurs on the left-hand side. @so-much-yet-to-learn’s theory about the Shadow is that Dan, Nai, and Trin can see ghosts/are being pursued by ghosts and shadows because they are breaking societal norms. Therefore they are evil, they are deviant, and they must be saved from continuing down The Left Hand Path.

Anyway, shall we look at some instances of left hands in Shadow? Of course we should!

Episode 1

Episode 1 starts out immediately with the first left-arm related injury of the series. It is hard to see, I completely missed it the first time I watched (and to show it clearly, I had to up the brightness in this image), but Trin’s left arm is bandaged. We do not yet know what the injury is, or how he got it. But, he is wounded nonetheless.

Things we know about Trin that could tie him to the “deviant” left-handed path: 1) Trin is queer, 2) Trin was fighting for institutional change at his school, 3) Trin was (apparently) using narcotics to treat his (extremely stigmatized) mental illness.

Left Hand Injury Count: 1

When Dan enters the pool for the first time, the Shadow, a Shadow? grabs a hold of him and he drowns. Where was Dan grabbed? His left ankle.

After Dan nearly dies in the pool, and Nai sees the Shadow that tried to drown Dan, Nai pulls Dan aside for a conversation about ghosts. Nai confesses to Dan that when he was a child, he listened to a voice in his head that asked him to play with it, and he wound up with a scar. It is an old wound, we can assume how he got it, but when he shows Dan the scar, it is a cut on his wrist. Which wrist? The left.

What do we know about Nai that could tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path? 1) he’s queer.

Left Hand Injury Count: 2

Episode 2

There are no left hand injuries in Episode 2, but there is still a lot of left-sided imagery

When Dan is telling Nai some of his backstory after they finish cleaning the chapel, Nai puts a comforting hand on Dan’s left shoulder. Dan tells Nai “You’re making an excuse to wipe your hand on my shirt as well. You got it all dirty” (not necessarily the strongest argument, but I wanted to note it because the left hand is considered unclean. Nai may be using his right hand, but he is adding dirt to Dan’s left side).

Dan gets in to his first fight with Anan and winds up having his wounds treated by Nai. Again, it’s not a left hand, but when Dan gets punched by Anan, he is injured on the left side of his face. (again, I understand this makes sense because Anan is right handed, but this is part of a trend, okay? hush.)

Left Side Injury Count: 1

We see Nai’s old injury in the flashback where he tells Dan his backstory and Anan ends up falling asleep on Nai’s left side.

When the Shadow appears at the piano, it appears on Dan’s left.

Episode 3

Dan sits on the left side of the monk when he is getting help navigating his lucid dreams and his connection to the Shadow.

When Dan first starts using that Lucid Dreaming Stone, he wears it on his left hand.

Episode 4

When Dan first arrives at the hospital to visit his father during the day, with Brother Anurak, Dan is standing on his father’s right side. Dan has spent a not insignificant amount of time this episode being told by Brother Anurak that he should visit his father, being told by Brother Anurak that he should forgive his father, and with the right side being associated with goodness, it makes some sort of sense, to me at least, that when he is under the supervision of the Brother, Dan would maintain appearances. But, in the evening, as he is waiting for his father to die, Dan sits on his father’s left.

In the evening, when Brother Anurak is not around, Dan slips in to a memory and winds up at a table with his father. His father asks for forgiveness and Dan does not give it to him. Dan confronts his father, makes his disdain for his father and his actions abundantly clear, calls his father by his first name, and beats the ever living fuck out of him. At this his father laughs, makes a comment about how Dan is just like him, and then dies. Interestingly, when Dan is grappling with engaging with his anger and beating up his father, it is his right hand that is bloody. (Again, this is not surprising because Dan is right-handed so naturally he’s going to throw punches with his dominant hand).

Dan wakes up, still on his fathers left just in time to watch him flatline. Coming out of this scene, what do we know about Dan that could tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path: 1) he does not engage in filial piety. Dan does not do what the adults, what his society expects him to do. Dan does not forgive his father. Dan disrespects his father. Dan denounces him. Dan does not honor his father’s dying wish. That is a huge deviation in my eyes from other shows I have watched with complicated, harmful family dynamics.

Episode 5

In the theater, Nai sees Trin following behind their teacher. Nai and Dan follow their theater teacher back to his office, where Nai promptly makes direct eye contact with Trin. Nai’s reaction is to grab Dan’s left hand, until Dan covers Nai’s eyes.

Nai is knocked over and he falls. This time it is Dan’s turn to tend to Nai’s wounds, and lo and behold, what do we have here? Another left sided injury, this time the knee. This one is notable to me only in the sense that left sided facial injuries can easily be justified by the fact that the person doing the punching is right handed. But Nai falls, so he didn’t have to skin his left knee. But he did.

Left Sided Injury Count: 2

Also, something that I did notice, (and I have not been keeping track of positionality of the living breathing characters and where they stand cause then I’d be here for a million years) is that in the flashback where Trin meets up with Nai at the lake and Trin reveals himself as Nai’s chat friend he is sitting on Nai’s left.

Episode 6

IT’S MONSTERFUCKER TIME!!!!!!!!!!! *air horn noises*

Dan smokes some weed and then falls asleep, only to be confronted by the Shadow. He sits his ass down, spreads his legs open, and has a lovely little wet dream. But when we see the Shadow engaging in some incorporeal sex stuff, the camera is focused on Dan’s left side. And hey, while we’re at it, let me just point out that every single time the Shadow appears to Dan at night, when he is sleeping? The frame we get where the Shadow looms over Dan and slowly sinks down to meet him? Always shot from Dan’s left side.

Now, we don’t know what Dan’s past experience with sex is like, but you can bet your ass that getting fucked by a Shadow would put Dan solidly in to the Sexual Deviancy category in the eyes of society. (I feel the need to state that only because this is the monsterfucker website, so I know our reaction to Dan and the Shadow doing some foolin’ around would not necessarily be the same).

When Dan wakes up in the morning, he notices some scratches on his arm and shoulder.

Which arm and shoulder? You got it! His left!

And it doesn’t have to be his left arm, right? Like, just because the scene before he wakes up showed us Dan’s left side, does not mean the Shadow, which is incorporeal, and has on more than one occasion wrapped two arms around Dan (left and right), has to have scratched up only his left arm. We can potentially add two more types of deviancy to Dan’s roster by the time he wakes up: 1) drug use, 2) sexual relationship to the occult

Left Hand Injury Count: 3

The story continues, and Dan at one point uses the restroom. He wipes his face with a cloth, it comes back stained black, and he looks up to see, who? Trin! Standing on which side of him? Left!

Episode 7

We open with Dan in the Funhouse, staring at a three-paned mirror. We know that when he looks in this mirror he will see two different people on either side of him in the mirror. But he is only shown in close up looking in one direction…his left.

Dan gets beaten up by Anan and sent to the infirmary where he is once again sexed up by the Shadow while being shot from his left side. Under SMYTL’s theory about the people who can see ghosts and shadows being those that are deviating from societal expectations, we have Dan going deeper in to a potential sexual awakening here.

Because of his fight with Anan, Dan once again ends up with wounds on the left side of his face.

Left Sided Injury Count: 3

Flashback to a similar scene with Trin, where Anan is being forced to apologize for fighting. I am assuming at this point I don’t need to say it…

Left Sided Injury Count: 4

(Side Note: Anan has a lot of fucking anger in his heart, idk fully what his problem is but I’m guessing abuse from his parent [I mean we do see him get slapped] and/or the #tired approach of internalized homophobia being externalized as violent homophobia against Known Gays).

Dan sees the Shadow again during rehearsals for Hamlet, and once again, the Shadow appears on Dan’s left, and I have to believe by this point that it is intentional that we see so much of the Shadow and Dan’s reaction to it from the left side, because Dan is standing on a stage right now. The film crew could have easily had the Shadow appear on the right. But they didn’t.

Dan has lost his lucid dreaming stone, and then gets shunted in to some sort of dream, vision, or other form of communication with a Shadow that is the most corporeal and condensed it has ever been, looking far more human than smoke. There he finds some drawings, and sees a man locked in a dungeon, handcuffed to a table.

He wakes up, goes about his day, and he ends up in the village listening to interviews of villagers talking about the wild ghosts that haunt the town. Where he learns about…

The One Armed Man. (you know where this is going).

The One Armed Man lost his left arm (I’ll use an image of the drawing, rather than the image of his bloody stump for people who are more blood averse).

We learn from the villager that the One Armed Man was a boxer, he joined the Navy, and one day when he was aboard the ship, the chain from the anchor…

“Tore his left arm right off.”

Left Hand Injury Count: 4

What do we come to learn about the One Armed Man that may tie him to the “deviant” Left Hand Path? 1) he sells himself to homosexual millionaires, 2) he starts working on a party boat and giving people narcotics 3) he maintains contact with “sexual deviants” after he is jailed [potentially 4) he uses narcotics himself, I say potentially here because the villager only says he gave others narcotics, but the vision flashbacks we get from Dan show O.A.M. cooking opioids over candle flame]

Promo for Episodes 8-14

According to the promo for the second half of this show, Dan will get yet another left arm injury bringing the (future) Left Hand Injury Count to (at least) 5.

Original Show Trailer

Now, based on the clip that follows, I am like 99% confident that this is Trin, so I think we find out how he ends up with an injured arm at the beginning of Episode One.

All of this to say that I think @so-much-yet-to-learn is on to something with the shadows and ghosts being seen by societal deviants and that the show is trying to indicate that with it’s strong use of left handed/left path imagery.

Alright, I’m off to watch all of Brother Anurak’s scenes again, because for some reason this visual of the One Armed Man looks like Brother Anurak to me, and I want to see if he actually uses his left arm.

#shadow the series #singto prachaya #fluke natouch #utt uttsada #fiat patchata

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