#if i ever get the time i might draw them using this...so ill tag this

[alchemiclee]

✨️ dreamcatcher core aesthetic ✨️

°•~☆○☆●☆○☆●☆○~•°

🐰minjicore

🐥boracore

🐺siyeoncore

🐱handongcore

🐶yoohyeoncore

🐼yubincore

🦊gahyeoncore

stole from my own twitter thread from 2020

[gravehags]

the burn between our hearts

Pairing: Ghouls/Ghoulettes x f!Reader

Rating: Mature

Tags: ghouls doing ghoul shit, depression, tender emotions, surprise papa

Words: 2,524

Summary: You have never felt so lost, so empty before, and you are unsure if what's wrong with you can ever be fixed.

a/n: THIS IS IT the final installment of the ghoul bicycle series. I have had so much fun writing this and who knows, might be tempted to write a little more if inspiration strikes me. See end of post for another note.

~~~

33 days.

It’s been 33 days since you’ve seen or heard from any of the ghouls.

You spent the first two and a half weeks of that in your room, sobbing wildly in bed while Sister Marguerite sat next to you rubbing your back and murmuring words of comfort to you. Truth be told, the steady presence of the middle-aged sister provided a warmth that you desperately needed. She never spoke ill of the ghouls and what they had done to you, instead telling you to be patient. That the Unholy Father always provides. That there’s always more to a bad situation than it seems. All difficult words for you to believe when your heart had been shattered the day after you had left Aurora’s room. Your mind was torn - on one hand you had come to expect this: being cast aside once they were done using you. On the other hand…you really thought you had something special with them. From your first time with Swiss to your last time with Aurora and every interaction with every ghoul in between, you felt like you were finally home. That you had finally found your place in the Ministry, by their sides.

Or not.

After most of your tears dry and your depression lets up to the point where you can leave your bed, you become angry. Fucking infuriated. Even before they were your lovers, they were your friends. And they just ditch you and act like you don’t even fucking exist anymore? Fuck that. One evening, you get so mad you stride down to the ghoul den and begin banging on their bedroom doors, cussing and cursing their names. How dare they treat you like you’re disposable? But that’s been the story of your whole life, you suppose. Everyone gets tired of you eventually. With one last slam of your fist against the wall, hard enough to bruise and shake Cumulus’ door, your tears begin to slip out once more.

“FUCK YOU!” you shout, unsuccessfully holding back a sob. The silence in the corridor is deafening so you turn on your heel and leave without a glance backwards. You don’t see the door at the end of the hall cracking open and eyes watching you go.

You return to your chores in the abbey, ignoring the sneers and dirty glances your fellow siblings give you. You’re well aware you’ve been a nuisance to everyone, being holed up in your room and shirking your duties, and you're wracked with guilt. Sister Marguerite assures you sweetly that it’s okay, everyone goes through rough spells and your absence hasn’t caused any undue burden on the rest of the siblings but you have a hard time believing her. You attend your duties but without any real life in your eyes or spring in your step. When you cry, silently, every once in a while, your sniffles draw rolled eyes and scoffs. The siblings don’t say a word to you, until one day, the dam breaks. You’re in the library and let out a small, embarrassing sob as you shelve a book on love magic when a loud slam echoes throughout the library.

“You are so fucking ridiculous, do you know that?”

You don’t realize she’s talking to you until you turn slightly and see her searing gaze. It’s Sister Tamsin. You don’t know her - not really - but she’s well-liked by a lot of people in the abbey. She’s never spoken to you before this and you frantically wipe your tears as she walks closer to you. A small crowd has been attracted to the two of you now, multiple pairs of eyes shifting between you both.

“Acting this way because of the fucking ghouls. Like you’re supposed to be special or some bullshit. Honey, the ghouls fuck everyone. They can’t help themselves. All of us have had a ghoul proposition us at some point, you’re just the only one stupid enough to fall for it. They’re nothing but fucking animals–”

“They are not animals,” you say loudly in a shaky voice but Tamsin isn’t done berating you.

“--oh look at that! She finally uses her mouth to speak instead of just opening it for ghoul cock and cunt. Go on, sweetheart. Tell us all how those beasts love you so much. Their little whore. Their–”

The slap echoes throughout the large room, but both your hands remain clenched into fists by your sides. Looming over Tamsin’s doubled-over form is Sister Marguerite, looking like fury personified in her neat habit.

“You little cunt,” Marguerite spits, causing your eyebrows to raise. You’ve never heard her swear before. “You know just as well as everyone else in this room - in this whole abbey - how sacred the ghouls are. Summoned by our own Papa from the realm of the Unholy Father to help him spread the word of our ministry. And you dare defile their name - and the name of those they have chosen - for petty cruelty? You are nothing, Tamsin. A jealous little gnat. And rest assured, Papa will be hearing about this.”

No one in the room is stunned quite as much as you as Marguerite abandons the red-faced, humiliated Tamsin in order to come to your side and escort you out of the room with her arm firmly planted across your lower back. When you finally step out of the library, she shuts the door firmly behind her and grabs your biceps, pulling you into a hug.

“Enough is enough,” she murmurs, rubbing your back. “I’m relieving you of your duties for the day. Take care, hon. Go back to your room. I’ll be having a word with our Papa.”

With one last squeeze she hustles down the hall, skirts flying and you’re left shell-shocked in the empty corridor. You rub at your eyes with the heels of your hands before doing as she requested.

Three days pass.

Three days and not a single soul dares look at you sideways let alone speak to you. You notice, with a twisted sense of satisfaction, that Tamsin is nowhere to be found. Not in the library, not in the gardens - you haven’t seen her at mass or in the dining hall. When you quietly ask Marguerite about her she just gives you a beatific smile and says, “she’s no longer a problem for you.” Something within you warns you not to inquire further so instead you go back to your normal life. After you finish a shift in the kitchens for the evening, you step out into the cloisters and head for a small courtyard you enjoy. You plop down onto a stone bench with a heaving sigh, trying to ignore the constant ache in your heart as you breathe in the evening air.

“Is this seat taken?”

Your head whips to the side and when you see a figure dressed in a red tracksuit and the earnest face of Papa Emeritus IV you jump up.

“Papa!” you gasp, curtsying before him. “I–no! Please, sit.”

He lowers himself next to you, putting his gloved hands on his thighs and taking a deep breath.

“Nice out, eh?” he asks quietly. You’ve never seen Papa like this - out of the majority of his papal paints and elaborate robes - and you certainly have never spoken to him in conversation like this.

“Beautiful,” you say, folding your hands in your lap. His eyes lower to watch you rub your fingers anxiously and worry at your cuticles. Gently, he reaches over and places a hand over yours.

“I know you’ve been hurting, sorella,” he murmurs, thumb grazing over your knuckles.

“You…you do?” All of a sudden you’re filled with dread at the thought of your poor mental state and shirked duties being reported all the way to Papa. You open your mouth to explain yourself, to apologize profusely but he speaks first.

“My ghouls,” he begins, “are very peculiar creatures. They don’t take well to most humans.”

“Oh?”

“Sì, sì…they are very protective of each other and of me. And…they don’t take human lovers.”

“They…don’t?”

“Not at all, sorella. Which makes you a very peculiar creature yourself. Something that my ghouls noticed straightaway. Something that they have spoken to me a great length about.”

Your stomach does a backflip and he looks at you with his mismatched eyes.

“Sorella, they wanted me to tell you…it is time. Go to them. Go to the last door at the end of the hallway this evening. I apologize for not telling you more - telling you sooner - but they had much to accomplish and wanted this to be a surprise.”

Your heart feels as if it’s going to burst through your ribcage and tears form in your eyes as you regard him.

“Papa…” you say quietly, your voice cracking, “thank you. Ave Sathanas. Thank you, Papa.”

He smiles at you warmly, and reaches up to briefly cup your cheek before jerking his head towards the corridor behind the two of you.

“Go on, cara. They are waiting.”

Before you can doubt yourself, you plant a brief kiss on Papa’s cheek and scurry off. As you make your way on the familiar path to the ghoul den, your hands shake by your sides. What did Papa know? What did Marguerite know, always reminding you to have faith and patience and guiding you with a gentle hand? When you enter the corridor you force yourself to take a series of deep breaths. Swallowing hard, and guided as if by an invisible hand, your feet take you down the wide corridor, all the way to the door at the end. Your pulse thunders in your ears and after a beat, you raise your fist and knock twice before placing your hand on the knob and turning slowly.

What meets your gaze after the door creaks open instantly brings tears to your eyes.

They’re there - all ten of them - standing in various spots in the large room staring at you. When you choke out a pathetic sob, Swiss is by your side in an instant.

“Hey, babygirl,” he says quietly, hand rubbing between your shoulder blades. “Do you like it?”

When you look up at him quizzically, he gestures to the room. You hadn’t even noticed the setting for all the ghouls you adored so dearly. A bed - a ridiculously enormous bed - is pushed against the far wall. Surrounding the large piece of furniture is a collection of thick cushions and pillows of varying sizes, blankets draped here and there. A dresser stands by the opposite wall and a doorway leads to a darkened room you assumed to be the bathroom. Eyebrows drawn in confusion, you look around at them.

“I…I don’t get it.”

“It’s yours,” Cirrus says, stepping forward and taking Swiss’ place at your side. “It’s what we’ve been doing all this time. We can’t bring a mate into the den and not make them a nest.”

She says it as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world but your jaw falls slack and you hear Aether let out a soft laugh.

“Mate?” your voice is comically high pitched as your eyes dart from Mountain to Sunshine to Aurora, perched on the end of the bed.

“If you’ll have us,” Cumulus supplies quickly, “we’re not going to assume but…”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

You can’t suppress the hurt in your voice and all at once they jump up and crowd around you.

“Love, like Cirrus said, we couldn’t tell you until we made a proper place for you,” Rain says softly, soothingly, “that’s how it’s supposed to be. The pack has to provide for you.”

“We’re sorry we didn’t say anything, though,” Phantom supplies, wringing his hands, “it…it wasn’t right to make you hurt like that. I told the others, but–”

“--But it was better than making you feel like you’ve been strung along. We had to make our intentions perfectly clear by doing this,” Mountain says calmly, gesturing around the room.

“I thought…I thought you didn’t want me anymore. That you didn’t care about me. That you never cared about me. I–” your words break off in a loud sob that has you doubling over on yourself and the ghouls looking anxiously around the room at one another.

“Honey, I’m sorry. We’re so sorry,” Cumulus says as she steps forward to embrace you, “human emotions can be…difficult for us to understand. We’ve never done this before, you know that? We’ve been telling you for so long that you’re special, that you’re perfect. If we didn’t want you we never, ever would have made this for you. You’re the one. You’re the only one for us.”

When you pull back from Cumulus’ arms, uselessly wiping your tears from her shoulder, she cups your face in her palms.

“We adore you. All of us.” The others nod emphatically, all reaching out to touch you in some way. It doesn’t feel real to you, but you drink it in all the same. Gently, you let go of your anger, of your doubt, and allow yourself to be filled with the perfect, aching love that surrounds you in this room.

“Thank you,” you whisper, squeezing Swiss’ hand in your left and Aurora’s in your right. “This is…wow. All for me, huh?”

“All for you,” Sunshine confirms, brushing your hair away from your face. “Does that mean you accept our offer?”

You let them squirm, just a little bit by remaining silent for a few seconds. When the “yes” leaves your lips, the room erupts triumphantly and suddenly your face is being smothered in kisses. When Swiss picks you up bridal style and carries you to the bed, you can’t help but laugh, thinking of your first time. The ensuing days of celebration are filled with as much love as lust, your naked form barely allowed to ever leave the bed and always surrounded by the sounds of pleasure. You’re thoroughly exhausted by the end of the third day, abbey duties completely forgotten and body limp in the soft sheets. Gently, so as not to wake your pack, you raise yourself onto your elbows and look around the room. On your right on the bed is Dewdrop, snoring softly, while Cumulus curls up behind you. Phantom has found a spot at the bottom of the bed and Swiss and Aurora are intertwined on a cushion across the room. Cirrus, Sunshine, and Rain sleep soundly in a pile next to them while Aether lies curled into Mountain. You smile as you regard the forms of your lovers - all ten of them, you want to laugh - and lower yourself back down into the pillow. Cumulus stirs and murmurs something into your hair, and you reach a soothing hand back behind you to scratch gently at her scalp. Dew’s eyes open briefly, glowing in the dim light of the room and he gives you a sleepy smile. Leaning over, you place a soft kiss on his forehead and run your thumb along his cheekbone.

And for once in your life, here at the abbey or otherwise, you are at peace, you are held, and you are loved.

~~~

a/n: if you're wondering what happened to sister tamsin well. ghouls get hungry, don't they?

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Just had the wild realisation that I can write whatever I want here. This is a thing that I am allowed to do. I can scream into the void. I don't have to tag my posts. Grammar is a social construct. It doesn't matter who's listening. The people I love and who love me will talk to me posts or no posts. Someone's going to read this and smile. Even if it's just me.

I can watch only the finales of shows to see their happy endings. I can eat cornflakes in the afternoon. I can go into bookstores just to creepily stare at the hardcovers of Victorian literature. I can write meticulous notes for subjects I'm not studying, and highlight it to Pinterest perfection. I can tell people I want to bite them out of sheer love. I can write long emails to my friends about weird slippers that remind me of them.

I can tell you that it's been a hot year, the hottest one to date, and that April hasn't seen a single drop of rain fall onto the earth. But it's hanging in the air, making it heavy with moisture and that relentless, relentless heat. It's muggy and the swamp theme I chose for my bullet journal couldn't be more appropriate. I can tell you how I keep singing that song in my head, Corner Of My Sky, the one whose music video has Michael Sheen wrangling with an occult toaster. "The rain, the rain, the rain, thank god the rain."

I can tell you anything I like. I can tell you that I'm afraid of being forgotten, that I've always longed to be famous, that I have a hard time not caring about every single little thing. I can tell you that I'm ace and I'm afraid that no one will ever love me the way I need them too, even if I love them the way that they need me to. I can tell you the nightmares have gotten better, but they're still there, they don't seem to want to leave me. I can tell you that I'm so much more ill and broken than I dare think about. Because I am afraid that if I start thinking about it, I shan't stop, and then it will become everything. And I don't want it to be everything. I can tell you that. I can tell you that I have beautiful memories, too, not just the fear and the loss and the anger.

I can tell you that I'm a performer, an entertainer, and I love making people laugh. I'm more comfortable on stage, where people are already listening, than trying to go up and make conversation to groups of strangers. I can tell you how wonderful it feels to have been able to speak to so many people all around the world, to have them know me, to listen to me, and to listen to them in turn. I can tell you that I don't know where to draw the line sometimes, I'm never entirely sure when I'm joking, and the act easily becomes a second skin. I can tell you all of that.

I can tell you all the things that I used to tell myself in letters sealed in envelopes addressed to Future Me. And it won't matter, and it does matter, and it's all so fucking absurd. It doesn't make any sense at all. Does it? I don't know. I can tell you that I don't know very much at all. Knock knock. Who's there? No one. No one who? No one who matters. Knock knock. I haven't been able to walk around for a month. This room is an oven and I'm being slow-cooked, broiled into a little Asmi pie. I read fanfiction yesterday after a long while. That was nice. I think it's really cool that you all know me. You do know me. Sometimes better than I know myself. I can tell you that.

I can tell you the truth. I can tell you I love you. And that to be seen and to be known is a gift that I will always be grateful for. I can tell you that you don't have to listen. But if you do, then hi! Nothing makes sense. Let's sit in the nonsense for a while. I have biscuits. Would you like one? I'm very human. It's one of the things that gets me so easily hurt. Maybe it happens to you too. I can tell you that my plant Crowley is surviving, unlike the others did. I can tell you that maybe you and I are, too.

It's 8:02 in the morning. I might just eat breakfast now. It does seem like the thing to do. How weird and wonderful that is.

[safe-from-sharp-teeth]

Ayo! I haven't answered asks in FOREVER, so it's time for some spring cleaning :) Also answering other stuff, like what I've been up to.

If you sent an ask and it's not here, sorry! I may have deleted it because the prompt required too much work of me and I wasn't feeling it, or I was uncomfortable.

Let's gooooo !

Firstly - where have I been? Work REALLY picked up in a way I wasn't expecting over the last...4 months? I was working double and often triple the hours I was used to. With work, vacations, random illnesses, and many video games I got a bit too obsessed with, this blog took a backseat. Plus, sometimes I get disinterested in vore when obsessed with something else. Sometimes, that lasts months, and it did this time.

But now I can confirm that work will FINALLY chill for a long period of time. I'm free! And more motivated than ever! Wahoo! Thanks for your support ALWAYS.

Next big question - when am I going to do more of my story? The one with Asyr? AHHHHHGHHGHH this story has consumed my life. I think about it daily. I dream about it. And yet I'm not as comfortable writing as I am drawing, so writing is a slow process that my perfectionist ass struggles with. I can assure you that there is a story in the works - and I am working on it at a snail's pace.

Okay, ask time...

@ponyluvesonic09 AYO maybe I'll make a full ghost pred pros/con list for you, because that sounds awesome! Kir//by is one of the silliest canon preds out there. Honestly getting eaten by him would be like getting vored by a vacuum, LOL. Galaxy tummy!! Imagine a prey floating around in one of those item bubbles all grumpy. Thank u for the ask, this is good stuff.

no. ( /・・)ノ

UWAGHHHHH I LIKE HER!!! Never played O/verwat/ch but what a gem!! I have a random fondness for centaur-like preds nowadays. She looks so cozy. THANK U I LOVE HER!!!

@tiger9o0 I have not played r//ain w//orld or know what it's about, LOL. Looks like a platformer? Man, I'm terrrriiiiibblleee at those. But whoever this is on the cover, I LIKE EM. A+. (That might not answer ur question shdjbghkjg SORRY)

@heimkoheimkofan LOVE THAT I GOT THE ROBOT ENJOYERS AFTER THAT ONE POST....YES yall are so right and I'm so wrong for just hard metal robot tums. I will rectify my mistake soon I PROMISE. Also oh! You were the one asking about stomachs other than elemental ones! IVE HAD THAT IN MY DRAFTS FOREVER IM SORRY AHHHH. I REALLY love your imagination with tums and you've inspired me to think of some awesome environments! THANKS

@fastfur07 BWAH?? Ugh I'm all over the place when it comes to art. Some pieces take 30 min (like the zangooc I drew at the top of this post), most take 2 days. Some really hard drawings like my wolf bat creechur from a few months ago and my shrimp from last year took a month. THANK U??

We're going back so far that I think this is about my naga oc (which I'm in the midst of redesigning cough cough). For him, he would never tolerate being prey, extremely unwilling bahaha. In general, I haven't thought much about naga or snake prey! I get the appeal of slurping up a noodle, but I just prefer human prey :)

@fastfur07 you fiend, you always give me the best drawing ideas. UNFORTUNATELY, I didn't have time to draw something for this one. BUTTTT....

(i've had this next one in my drafts for forever)

then i had a silly comic. I'll post the wip here because I won't finish it, so enjoy bahaha.

@blizzaria123-blog THANK U im rapidly melting into a puddle from ur words

@mrpotatomanversionsix relevant. i will continue drawing them 4 u

?!??!!??!?!??!?!?!??!?!? how dare u enter my ask box with this blasphemy

@sfwsillynoms WAH!!! you!!! I'm currently redesigning my naga oc but when I finish I'll tag you, if you're still around! And he can 100% be drawn with ur preysona :)

@mystorl i am SO late to this, but SMART. I like it. I shall give my lil guy this friend. I just want to let u know that I see this and it's wonderful and I will do something abt it.

I remember this ask made me laugh a ton when I first got it. thank u. idk why I find this so funny

@sillylilprey IM CRYING RIGHT BACK AHHHH this is an ancient ask, but thank u! hope you're still enjoying!

@terrytheinsane finally, the last ask in my askbox. I love it. You have been wronged with how long it took me to answer you. I have gained knowledge from your ask. THANKS

AND THAT'S IT!! Thanks guys, I hope to make you proud! Feel free to send more asks, and hopefully I will answer in a TIMELY manner.

Goodnight! And remember: Nice Vore ᕕ༼⌐■-■༽ᕗ

[drinkinboilingcoffee]

heyyyyyuuuuhhhhhggg

Hi! Little info about me!

Don’t have a name I’m comfortable using on this site rn (I avoid using my real name, and I’m thinking of finding a more gender neutral version of my name irl)

Ok with the username-nickname Coffee, though!

He/They preferred

MINOR (I might have put this somewhere here sorry)

I draw stuff??? Write when I can? I’m probably gonna do a FNAF AU fan comic if I ever get the motivation.

I’m pretty opinionated on fandom topics (especially theories and shipping discourse), so please be aware of this and expect I do rant a lot, especially about the FNAF community.

Fandoms:

-FNAF (all posts part of my AU)

-TADC

-Beastars

-Batman (again, AU)

-SCP (just getting into it)

-Dungeon Meshi

-My Eyes Deceive

DNI: Pro/comshippers, M@PS/p*dos, zoos, terfs, bigots, trolls, etc (you guys know who you are). 18+/NSFW accounts can interact, but don’t send me inappropriate content or reblog my content.

Content warnings (I tag these things): blood, violence, gore, mental illness depictions and fandom-typical abuse. Suggestive/raunchy jokes may show up but I don’t post explicit content ever. SA implications or mentions may show up in some of my content for my stories (mainly with my William A.’s backstory) but ONLY in implicative form (do NOT interact with such posts if you are trying to get off to them- it’s serious content matter, not a kink fic). Also, this isn’t a vore blog, but I do mention SFW (yes, NONSEXUAL) vore in jokes and characters posts from time to time.

TADC/FNAF AU MASTERPOST:

FUNTIME ANIMATRONIC REFERENCES:

Do not DM me weird stuff or I block u immediately.

Requests and in character asks open! Just click that ask button! (Please)

Totally fine to repost my art or use it as an icon, just credit me!

Likes < reblogs, but do whatever you want any attention or interaction is greatly appreciated.

ok BYEEEEEEE

[natsmagi]

tbh you should just sexualize your fem Tsumugi more. I'm talking full on fetish hentai style. Put her in the open boob sweater. Have her accidentally flash while leaning fowards. Have her slip and show pantsu. Full kink with no breaks. Please shut these anons up. People trying to police your creativity like it has some sort of reflection on your morals or beliefs. I also wish you would stop answering them? or at least tagging it as anon hate because it's so sad to keep seeing people be so mean to you over and over when most of us just want to enjoy your big brain takes and drawings. Maybe I'm getting parasocial bc I get so sad seeing people hate on your Tsumugi I love her she's just like me fr!!! All that matters is that you enjoy how you draw her and I hope you don't feel pressured to change your headcanons.

HWEISUHRUHKDHG I SHOULDDDDDDDDD I SHOULD UR RIGHT ive been too prudish as of late. need to be insane again. Tbh ive made some art that was made purely bc i am a freak and insane but i feel like its never the art people would expect it to be. And thats really funny to me. like my more explicit stuff is just drawn for fun But if uve ever looked at a drawing of mine and gone "this seems kind of freakish conceptually even though the execution isnt super weird" Well thats probably bc it actually is freakish. sorry. My suggestive art is usually just for the vibes tho i DID also like. yesterday?? discover a twt acc that will sometimes post various lingerie fits SO!! MAYBE ILL DRAW SOME SOON 💪💪

AND AUGHHH I KNOWWWW in the beginning i thought itd be worth replying to people bc i was like "well this is all kind of niche. im sure they have good intentions so we might aswell talk it out" But as things progress its been made clear thats doing me or anyone else no favors. i love having discussions, so i reply to most of my asks! but i do hope that ive made myself clear enough and that we can all just continue doing our own things im sorry to hear its made you sad though!!!!! rest assured its not something that demotivates me, nor is it something that makes me feel i need to change how i draw. i do what i do because i enjoy it! and i know others enjoy it too! i will never be able to appeal to everyone, and that has never been my goal. i like having fun with others though, which is why i enjoy hearing why others might think differently than me!

but yes! i already feel ive said my piece on the whole discourse thing by now and i hate walking in circles, so even if i get negative asks about it i likely wont answer unless i feel its warranted. but! if that does happen, ill be sure to tag it! you can mute "#discourse tag" ahead of time incase i ever end up using it

[lemongrass--tea]

Good morning and Happy Friday! You are an incredible artist! I've been browsing your work (on here and on Pillowfort!) and I am amazed by your mastery of anatomy and how you infuse character in each of your pieces.

First, I saw through the #sdv elliott tag how you were asking about drawing other fans' farmers. If you're still interested, I happily offer up mine! You can DM me for references if you so desire.

Second, I want to know more about Elliott and Connor. What's Connor's story? How did he and Elliott get together? What do they love best about each other?

And correct me if I'm wrong, but I've inferred from some of your art that he is a tengu, or at least a related entity. That's so neat! Tell me more about that. 😁👍

Hee hee heee this came out so long lmao I tried to be concise but I’ve written the epistle of Connor and Elliott lore😩

(And I would love to draw your farmer I’m gnawing at the bars of my enclosure like a rabid animal)

Connor is certainly similar to a tengu in the sense that what he’s based on is a similar mischievous spirit fae species type thing. I combined two Caribbean myths for him, chickcharnie and gaulin wife.

Linked some info on the two, but I’ll say the gaulin wife telling here isn’t the exact one that I remember, there’s this one telling that has a song in it that the wife sings “oh what a foolish man, he married the gaulin” BUT IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR WEEEEKS I can’t find it it might be lost media🥲. I also can’t remember the EXACT way that version went since I heard last it when I was like- 11 lmao. But the concept is pretty much what’s in this version.

SO that gets us to Connor, I wanted him to have the whole monster bird fae elements of the chickcharnie to have a reason to be feared or distrusted by his home town, but I also REALLY love herons (hence the gaulin bride) and the whole jingle from that tale. So I was like, what if everyone around them (mostly from Connor’s home life because bird man cryptid is par for the course in pelican town I think lmao) would think Elliott to be like, crazy for wanting to be with a fae. So they’re like a twist on the myth where instead of the man seeing this perfect spouse that turns out to be a trick, everyone else EXPECTS a trick but they’re just hopelessly in love.

I hope that makes sense

So Connor has 2 sisters, Cara his “twin” and Khipz their younger sister. If you’ve ever seen that writing prompt where a fae asks a mother to pick which is their real child vs the fae’s copy and she responds like “they’re both my children” that’s kind of what happens here. I think it fits considering chickcharnie are known for like, kidnapping and luring little kids into the pine forest, fun stuff, so a baby swap sounds about right.

The real twin was stillborn/terminally ill, but their mother has connections to the local fae through her family (grandpa from the actual canon) having a good relationship through the time they lived in the valley. So she begs for a way to save the kid, and they grant this favor by doing a little swap, they take the baby and give her Connor.

The father is not quite so tolerant to fae activity, so he DOES NOT vibe with Connor, pretty much seeing him as like not really theirs, but ofc Connor’s a baby he has no way to understand the hostility here. But he’s willing to let him pass as long as he’s able to keep up appearances. This man is all about reputation and appearance, he wants that white picket fence life, hes a major business man in their town he expects perfection. But the cultural context of the fae being dangerous and uncontrollable he does not want people to know that he’s connected to that. So they raise Connor to suppress his magic and such, he has to keep up appearances as fully human, perfect little identical copy of his twin (which includes being raised feminine since the original expectation was two girls so that’s what Connor’s default appearance was)

At a point though a kids going to start developing their own persona, so once he hits teen years he’s not really comfortable being constrained to copying Cara. He’s allowed to shift his presentation to his current male presentation, but it does kinda throw a wrench in his dad’s perception of him. Every disagreement and every personal decision is more and more strain as Connor’s less willing to conform, which raises his dad’s concerns about his nature as a fae. Not to mention he becomes more of a liability reputation wise because the harder he tries to control Connor the harder he pushes back, babe is prone to reckless behavior (but really in the childlike skipping class and launching a dirtbike off a ramp into a lake or something way), and their dad does NOT know how to handle it besides meeting that energy with anger especially if he’s roping his sisters into his antics.

ENTER STAGE RIGHT OUR BABYGIRL ELLIOTT

I love the concept of him being an ex-trust fund rich kid that left to pursue his own desires. So they meet in like 9th grade or so, when their parents are meeting to discuss whatever business deal they’ve got going on. And they hit it off so much cuz they’re both starting to explore being their own person and discontentment with expectations and conformity, but at this point Connor does not tell him that he is not human due to fear that he might have the same disdain that his own dad has, especially considering even his SISTERS don’t know. His mother’s been telling him all these years you can’t let anyone know, we don’t want anyone to get hurt right? It’s just not the right time, I imagine there’s an element of him fearing HIMSELF a fair amount, especially since he’s not in practice of taking his bird forms. All of his focus goes into keeping that side of himself suppressed.

But time passes and yknow young love, they’re close friends and romantic feelings start showing up, they end up sharing their first kiss and Connor is unable to stop himself from just letting all those inhibitions go. He suddenly sprouts little baby feathers and the starting nubs where his horns would grow in, tail wagging a mile a minute, but while Elliott’s taking this in because WHAT HAPPENED Connor’s dad finds them in whatever room they’d snuck off to and man is LIVID because as far as he’s concerned his biggest insecurity just got outed and being fresh to his investors son, what are they gonna think of him, so improper, how dare you. He gets dragged off to get berated and such and gets banned from being allowed anywhere near the company lest he cause more problems.

Elliott loses contact because like, neither of them have any means of contact and then he gets sent off to a boarding school to finish high school, and he brushes off the whole thing in his memory like maybe I was just hallucinating. Fae aren’t common around the city so he wouldn’t be too aware of that being an option.

Connor has the whole thing in the back of his mind like oh he probably freaked out and hates me now just like father dearest said he would, especially since Elliott never got the chance to react beyond the initial shock.

DECADE PASSES

I mentioned before in his last lore post that there’s more mounting hostility and eventually Connor decides to cut off completely, his mom gives him grandpas land so he moves to pelican town.

And like imagine his shock to see Elliott there, standing on that bridge, he’s internally freaking out then he turns and smiles at him with the opening line “oh you must be the new farmer everyone’s talking about, it’s a pleasure” and he politely kisses his knuckles and it’s like a complete parallel to their first kiss where he just loses it all over again. And like in that time he’s had other relationships other flings, and he thought he was in complete control because NEVER after that first time did he ever have a slip up again, then Elliott comes along and just KNOCKS EVERY WALL DOWN with a fleeting GREETING of all things.

Then there’s like this pause of realization from Elliott of oh my god it’s you.

I’m so unwell for them. Elliott gets his proper explanation of him and it’s like, the first time he’s not pressured to have to hide himself anymore, he thinks it’s **fascinating** and beautiful not something to be feared and reigned back. So they get to rekindle that long lost friendship and all those feelings come tumbling back into the equation.

They definitely build their relationship off emotional support and shared experience, two bros against the world frfr

[beebundt]

“Nine People you want to know better” tag game

omg i can't remember the last time ive played one of these tag games thank you @demekii for the tag!! i hope you enjoy boy and the heron, it was fun watch for sure 🫶 🫶 also ive been watching analog horror video essays lately as well so i totally feel your struggle LOLLL😭

Last Song: my song on loop for the week has been Killing Eve by Benét. i rlly like this artist

Favorite Color: give it up for my primary color gang ⁉ specifically these. i will use these colors at every opportunity it's so yummy to me. plus a green bc im learning my affection for green this past year

Last Movie/TV Show: i rewatched arcane.... i can't wait until season 2, i really love the art direction of that show. also rewatched howl's moving castle, most beautiful film of all time my beloved.

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: sweet, savory, then spicy. im not a big fan of super spicy but a little is fine! and i always love having a little sweet drink or smth

Relationship status: do you think miss karlach/laezel baldur gate 3 will crush me like a soda can if i ask nicely enough

Last thing I googled: Orin The Red wiki page.......... ive been playing my durge playthru on bg3 lately and getting rlly fixated on the sibling relationship between durge & orin and just reading too many wikis than necessary .....

Current Obsession: my favorite thing is just watching 1-4 hour long essays on things ive never heard abt or dont haven't thought abt super in depth before. ever since i watched this one random video essay on Brave (the disney movie) that perfectly summed up what was bothering me in that movie that id never put into words like 3-4 years ago, ive been chasing that high ever since. did you know learning is so fun (*if the video essay is actually well researched and good). outside of that i love watching charborg twitch vods while im drawing or playing smth

Last Book: i have trouble focusing on reading books sometimes bc ive had bad experiences with them in the past....... 🧍‍♂️ i ache to be a book girlie. but i have to push myself to read more in order to find good books. however smth i WANT to read is the locked tomb series

Looking forwards to: playing a oneshot this coming february with my dnd group where ill be playing a mean pretty twink. guys i have to come up with an insult list of things he might say ahead of time, imagine that being ur homework. also i joined a lgbt club ? that i didn't know my college had so very intrigued with whatever may happen with that in the future. what does an lgbt club even do. crime ? gay ?

dw abt doing this if you don't want to 🫶 tagging kind moots/ppl i would love 2 get to know more. blinks cutely @myagletismissing @notskeleton @66dataa @rascheln @vasirah @kornyo @dreadfutures @shouty-y @rennybu @rnangopantsu

[dodgeryy]

This blog is dedicated to neurodiversity and mental health, specifically personality disorders and even MORE specifically cluster B. I love using this blog to connect with others like me, reblog and share their experiences, and try to bring light-hearted PD content into our communities. I personally do not post vents on my blog, but I do take care to properly tag them when I post/reblog them. I also post the occasional fandom / chronic illness / disability post here and there as well as ofc cute animals and funny hahas.

ASKS / DMs / SUBMISSIONS OPEN AND ENCOURAGED!

I am an adult! Minors are free to interact/follow/moot, but be aware that I might interact w or reblog adult content. (Anything heavy will always be tagged.)

Some posts may have themes of trauma, child hood trauma, psychosis/mania, depression, anxiety, and paranoia. I tag as best I can, and don't ever get graphic. Feel free to ask for specific trigger tags if you are a follower.

DIVAS. I am Ery, I am known 4 dressing cunt and acting like cunt. I am a big fan of the whimsical and fantastical, and media that is horrifying and gut wrenching. The waters call to me and every time I see anything bigger than a puddle I want to jump in.

I am a college student student w impulse control problems. I am studying fashion design and like to spend my money on calico critters and way too expensive accessories. You can find me in my sewing studio half naked because I realized there is a cute, easy, life changing alteration to the outfit I was wearing that I need to make RIGHT NOW. I spend my free time buying things to feel something, video gaming, and being not normal about many things.

My go to coffee order is a mocha.

Gay gay insane and disabled so here are some labels / disorders I got.

Genderqueer • aroace • lesbian

AuDHD • NPD • BPD • OCD

POTs • Pectus Excavatum • Connective Tissue Disorders • Mitral Valve disease

HERE ARE MY HOBBIES

Sewing / designing

Dungeons and Dragons

Character design / drawing

Arts and crafts in general

Color guard

Astrology / Tarot

Yearning for the waters (swimming and lifeguarding)

SPECIAL INTERESTS

Airplanes / aviation

How to train your dragon (books)

Dungeons and Dragons

MEDIA I HAVE PLAYED/WATCHED

These are not all current but does not mean I am not down 2 chat about them!

Greys Anatomy

LoL/Arcane

JJBA

Hades

Gemini Home Entertainment, other internet horror series!!!,

madoka magica

HTTYD(animated)

Harry Potter

PjO

good omens

critical role + Vox Machina

and a lot more I forgor but like. There.

MUSIC ARTISTS I LURV

Saint Motel

Oingo Boingo

Orville Peck

Cake

Record Heat

Lord Huron

TV Girl

Bjork

Florence + the Machine

Portugal the Man

[xxcrumbxx]

Dca slasher au belongs to @wyervan :]

Hehehhe im happy to report I finished some ruff outlines for the fellas ,im thinking about redoing the lineart agin thats why im calling it "ruff" lol also moons lookin at sun he duse not have snake eyes I just noticed it kinda looks like he duse lol . I wasent shure what there wepons would look like +i dont draw wepons alot so ehh .

Anyway hears anouther wip , Ive been crankin out wips scents the day bf crismas eve bc i got my present early and its a drawing tabllit:0 shes so pretty and fun to work with named her blueberryand I hope we can make wonderfull things together :] . Hehhe

also ofc @wyervan you diserve kind words :] anyway l hope you have a lovely time and that im not bouthering u with the amount of lore im giving my y/n also i gess you added to ur slasher au playlist or i just didnt lisen to it fully (bc my phones a lil janky and pauses things when i listen to long) idk why but man you got some good mf songs on oh and i have a suggestion that might fit the fellas its.

slipknot -viruis of life. *and ik its maby just couenceadence but somesongs lind up so well with my y/n and boy oh boy thats what kick started me into the purfume wip( the masks name is purfume bc when i was making it i was inpashent and tryed it on bf the paint was dry and it was aird out from the meltd plastic where i reshaped it anyway the fumes gave me a headake lol i made purfume a in 2023 and have been doing tutch ups and reinforcing it ever scentse :]

@r0tting-rat hheh*seth rogan laghf* so i just read ur kind and lovely tags when i was about to post , im so happy u think that :] and the thing about them in full body in my stiyle welll hehehaha I love when shit lines up lol ,im glad yall like the cuddly fellas, so um hope you injoy them ik its not full body ill get around to that when i get use to drawing them .im still figureing em out :] heheh yay moots lol. Btw i raad youre writing prompt thing fore the slashers and dude that guy so desurved it like dont sell drugs to kid mf .. SELL EM TO ME >:] lol ( just weed and shrooms plz jack ass jake or what ever the loud ass's name was ) i love moons little song and how freekiy cute sun was at the door dude was sutch a distraction lol :]]

Lil tid bit about what i did last night bc I had fun [ affter cut ]

Okay so I was drawing for awhale affter coming back from a eve party at my stepdads moms place ( idk what to call her) and around like 1:23am I got bord and so I walked to the park in my town bc its just down the rode . On my way there someone was playing Abrahcadabra ( good song ) on speekers in there house so I took my earbuds out to listen to it bc it ecod nicely down the street anyway I swung for like awhile whal smoking then went down the wet af slide ( it rains alot hear) and then i just kinnda swang a bit more .i also found gold and silver confetti on the ground whitch i obveusly keepd bc pretty( and it reminded me of the Dca's Anyway i walked around for awhile listaning to misic and "dance walking" awile as in 3 houers and found new trash every time i tryed to leave so i threw it away which i had to walk back to the biger side not far away but still a good bit

( i fucking hate litter) but it started to feel like someone was messing with me bc like when i whent back to the spot i picked trash up from there was new trash . I kid you not there where 12 fuckin burger king shuger packits on the ground and shoved in the crevis of the sidewalk ??? They where full to and i just >:0 who even has 12 unopend packs of burger king suger packiets ???? Why would u even have that ??

[mobydingus]

Hii um, really sorry about bugging you but I was scrolling through tags and I saw that you drew lovely Nathan and Leslie work a while back; I'm wirting a huge personal AU and one of the subplots is her breaking Nathan out of camp so they can do a world domination thing lol

I've never seen any headcanons of them ever so it's super hard to wirte (even if it is just for myself, but I love over analyzing both of them) so I was wondering if you had any cools ones that you're comfortable with sharing?? I'm really really sorry if this is random, from a random user but I'm just so content starved and your art on here is so comforting and I love the scene one so so much!!!!

So um, if you can please tell headcanons >⁠.⁠<

wow i really appreciate that! i have a few, nothing too exciting. im not sure if you meant for them interacting or independent headcanons but ill say what i remember. it might be a longer response than you asked for LOL

for more technical ones:

i headcanon that nathan knows at least a little about how leslie works as a robot so if she gets hurt he can help fix her (but hes no robotics engineer so he cant do much about major damage). i also think that she can continue to mimic voices (like when she pretended to be president). she can use this to help herself or nathan (usually blackmail) but she also uses it to taunt nathan (for example, mimicking jimmy to piss nathan off). i also think leslie can change her body temperature from colder than a human to scalding hot (sometimes not on purpose, if she isnt working properly she might overheat which could damage her). i always imagined that there was some sort of underground facility (i wanna draw this but lazy) where she went to recharge, but thats one of my more fantastical headcanons. i personally think she didnt have parents or a house to live in (only a facility) but thats just me. i imagined that after leslie died, nathan recuperated and went to the crime scene or wherever her body was held and either: a. she showed signs of being functional, so he broke her out. or b. assumed she was completely dead/a lost cause and left her there (and she was still alive but wasnt capable of showing signs). both are fun ideas . i imagine that nathan diverted a great deal of his savings from drug-dealing to help repair leslie if he had saved her.

as for their relationship, in my headcanon:

neither of them will admit that they care about one another, even though they do. leslie doesnt admit it because she thinks that being emotional could compromise her rational thinking. nathan does not admit it because i dont think hes ever admitted any true feelings of appreciation or friendship for anyone lol. he would not do anything that might make him emotionally vulnerable (not that hes really conscious of this).

they both taunt eachother and can be meaner than they intended to. they both have a habit of lying to others in canon, so i imagine they still do that.

from a rational standpoint, leslie considers nathan an important asset and his ability to keep quiet about important (and unethical) things makes him valuable for secret operations. from a not-so-rational standpoint, she appreciated his different approach to life and the fact that he is not phased by leslies bizarre nature (the way she acts when she drops her act of being some innocent kid). she has grown fond of him in a way that i believe resembles an unspoken friendship.

nathan first considered leslie as another person to harass, but after being "employed" by leslie, he began to actually appreciate her, and its probably the first time a girl did not instantly hate or pity him. he probably has some sort of crush, but maybe not because leslie is crazy. he also thinks leslie is scary (but so do most people who have dealt with her "mask-off"). i think nathan likes leslie more than leslie likes nathan, but nathan is the first person she goes to if she has a problem, so they are dependent on each other at least a little.

thank you for your ask. hope it wasnt too much of an answer

[aseriesofunfortunatejan]

Some quick Hundred Line comments. I am adding tags to these posts so before you read this, please note that this is coming from a place of being very familiar with Kodaka's works, loving some of them, but not being currently interested in his works. I'm watching from the sidelines.

The key artstyle and some of the character designs remind me of RAIN CODE more than they remind me of Danganronpa. Of course it's still the exact same people. But it's really just... Komatsuzaki's *current* style. It's slightly different. The main character in the key art, notably, looks like he comes straight from RAIN CODE. That blue haired OC-looking girl reminds me of Guillaume if anyone.

I'm getting bad vibes from the uniform they're wearing

It's 2024. Can whoever is drawing the sprites at this point learn to draw clothes? The shapes and shading on the clothes are disgusting. Like so deeply unappealing, and they don't look like normal fabric. I'm realising RAIN CODE seriously benefited from apparently using bust-up sprites.

The blue haired girl's design is so bad she makes everyone look bad. Her 3D model looks better in that it's funny. The two siblings(?) have cool hair, as much as the pink haired one looks like every Danganronpa OC ever, but their uniform is so ugly AND badly drawn it ruins their swag completely. One just looks like some "casual AU Angie" fansprite. The others are pretty bland looking but inoffensive to me.

I want to make it extra clear that I'm a huge believer that comparing everything Kodaka and his team create to Danganronpa is an extremely obnoxious way to be. Of course, he is The Same, Human Guy and some aspects are similar between all of his works - especially since he works with the same designers/artists. This is why if you like one author you might be interested in reading their other works too. But this game in particular takes elements from Danganronpa on purpose. It's extremely close, even just the music on the site, but also the enemies have Another Episode vibes, the big door looks like the one in Danganronpa 1, plus the obvious being stuck inside a school. This time they really went and did it.

I don't know enough about the game to make a judgement yet, but so far nothing about it is appealing to me. Not the designs, what little view into the characters and story we got, the gameplay. I also want to note that as a rule of thumb, I do not currently have an interest in playing Kodaka's new creations for a bunch of reasons. However, I bear no ill will towards him and Too Kyo Games and am hoping that his endeavours, current and future, in publishing his own works lead him to be compensated fairly for the popularity of his creations.

[ofthatcolossalwrxck]

PINNED POST.

★ 。＼WILBUR SOOT｜REVIVEBUR ERA.／。★

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — roleplay account for c!wilbur; canon-divergent, operates in the same timeline as the events of post-hitting on sixteen up until the finale. the character's ending is NOT canon to this blog. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — from this post onwards, i will be acting as if revivebur himself is running the blog herself. almost every entry will be written as if it's a diary log, because that's how she practically uses this account! don't be too surprised this blog consists so much of her reblogs to her interests (poetry for instance) and her talks regarding daily, mundane life. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — revivebur can answer or ignore depending on how i think she would react to your interactions, anonymous asks, etc. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — revivebur uses he/she pronouns. wouldn't mind if you call her by any other pronouns, like they/them. just not all the time. for other alternative names to call her, you can call her wilbur. revivebur. rev. anything, really. or by her alias, march. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — i will be depicting her as transfem; he personally identifies as an aromantic, sex-repulsed asexual. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — i am certain she will ignore any explicit NSFW-related content from accounts she doesn't know too well and even if she knows you, doesn't make her any less uncomfortable. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — suggestive flirting is okay, but he'll be a bit freaked out if you try and advance further on that. revivebur's okay with flirting in general, especially playful banter and stuff.

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — however she is aromantic, so though she may play along, she will not develop strong romantic feelings for your character. the strongest feeling you could ever get from her will always be queer platonic. +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — heavily BPD and schizophrenic coded, written by someone with BPD and schizophrenia! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — it is of my personal headcanon that she shows very little photos since revivebur's scared of her own appearance. if ever, she reaches the point of confidence where she sends pictures of herself, i will be the one to draw it. everything else will be drawn personally! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — this is an account i made for fun; i might do a bit of angst there and there, but that's because it's revivebur. themes regarding mental illness is present, and any kind of triggering content will be tagged. obviously, she might darkly joke about the things she went through, and i cannot ignore her trauma for it's an integral part to her character. but for the most part, all of it will be done in light-hearted fun for me and my friends! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — all of her posts will be tagged accordingly to certain subjects; her entries in particular will be tagged by #rev's personal entries. any other mundane posts will go under the #rev's daily life.. tag or #rev's thoughts. reblogs will be tagged by #rev's reblogs; and responses to asks or anything else will be tagged by #rev responds! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — out of character (like where i talk specifically) are messages marked by symbols; '//' !! like for ex: // HAJAJSJS im dying so hard +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — you can send writing prompts, starters, and one shots! i will be more than happy to provide! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — everything regarding her is within my personal headcanons; don't like? then just scroll away, easier done and said! +

☆ ⋅ ⋆ — blog monitored by @parfaitxparlour ; this pinned post can and might be updated as time goes on! +

[katana-zero]

TUMBLR USER GAMMANULLZERO I LOVE YOU

Hold on let me try to answer to all of your tags dkdmmfmmc I woke up this morning and it was the first thing I saw AAHHH

Also sorry english is not my first language so I might struggle with some sentences!! (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

I'M GLAD THAT THIS PIC CAPTURED HER WELL 🥹🥹🥹 I wanted to draw something chill because!!! Well!!! She is chill!!

TY I love when people like my coloring (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠)

I LOVE YOUR MIND

I think actually he would feel trouble feeling anything. He'd probably regret killing kids if he ever done that (because of LG) but otherwise I think he wouldn't feel anything. At first I thought that he'd feel alive, since canonically he feels alive only when taking someone else's life, but I'm not sure he'd feel anything just watching the record.

Or he'd feel the stinging feeling of regret, if church monologue is actually his (I have a theory that it's actually Fifteen's thoughts, but I'm not really sure so!! Just a fun thought) and he felt bad watching all those people cry.

Or he'd feel everything at once like one big complicated feeling (⁠*⁠﹏⁠*⁠;⁠) I don't know how to describe it.

THANK YOU!!! 🥹🥹🥹

I love SnowHunter SO MUCH my favourite lesbians. They have me in chokehold since I first thought about them I just. Need more of them in my life.

I think Snow uses something similar to chronos! Like that green thing Psych used in boss fight. He mentioned that the government created more than just one drug for war, so it's safe to assume that she will most likely use something similar. Or it might be something that organization Snow works for created, since they somehow recreated chronos. I hope we'll see what she uses in the dlc 🙏

I LOVE USING RED THANK YOU SM

🥹 jsjxjjsk Zero and Fifteen cuddling Leviathan and Behemoth... The eepies

Fifteen stop being mad just hug a biblical creation bro chill out

:3 I love drawing Zero with a scruff, I'm glad someone else likes it too!

Fifteen katana zero I need you Fifteen katana zero

AHHH I'M SO HAPPY YOU NOTICED THE EFFECT!! I like drawing it on my artworks with nulls because it shows how their time is running out yk yk (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧ mentally ill guys

THANK YOU AGAIN FOR ALL THE FEEDBACK I LOVE YOUUU AGHHHHHH

YAYYYYYY IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE ALL OF THESE!!! I GOT A FEW THINGS TO SAY BACK

ykw ykw. i think he'd feel so much about everything that he'd just go numb. his normal blank expression on his face but somehow even more unreadable than normal. idk if he'd be able to feel anything after that. him feeling "alive" while killing is just him feeling like he's actually having an effect on the world around him yk? that's how he was raised, a child soldier. but losing your memories of that and then running with the mindset that only the lives of criminals and corrupt police deserve less value only to see yourself killing children? beings that physically cannot have less value because they have so much more life ahead of them? brooooo brooooooooo he's done for he's donneeee. I really like the theory that the monologue is from fif instead of zero too- and it makes sense! fifteen has such strong connections to his past that of course he'd have such strong thoughts about what it was like. zero for sure could say it himself but he's so warped about whats real and not that i dont think he could form that strong of an opinion (and if it IS his thoughts then its just what psych planted in his head)

SPEAKING OF PSYCH im pretty sure the green mega chronos or whatever the psych uses was confirmed to be not actually canon and (speculation from here) just a hallucination from zero's end considering the path to getting that boss is just by pissing him off. BUT but but i do think her amping herself up on the fake chronos that the company is making is soooo real. i hope we see in the dlc god ugh. either way i definitely gotta draw some snowhunter myself since i havent stopped thinking about it.

anyway YEAHHHHH RUNNING OUT OF TIMEEEEEEE. i loveeee how subtle it is in your art but also directly staring you in the face. youre soooo good at it !!!!!

[firedragon1321]

I think Kingdom Hearts fandom is going through a “renaissance” into bad behaviors I haven’t seen in a while.

Kingdom Hearts shipping toxicity usually increases the longer we lack canon content. That’s not entirely unique to KH. Fandoms tend to spin their gears during downtime between installments, and a lot of that gear-spinning is shipping. But. Like. Kingdom Hearts shipping is so toxic, I’m slipping under.

I put this under a read more for length. And also a sprinkle of vent. Ship names are censored to keep this out of their tags.

Prologue

This is not meant to bash on any ship. It is simply chronicling what I saw in the past and now, and drawing a line between them. 

Regarding S0wwiku and S0k@i- I’m not trying to bash S0wwiku as a concept. It actually makes more sense to me than S0k@i, which smacks of someone behind the scenes forcing the characters together. I might even ship Sowwiku openly, if not for the bad behavior outlined here.

Regarding akuw0ku- That ship is my nOTP for reasons that will become apparent in this rant. If you ship it, I mean no ill-will towards you. But I personally can’t stomach it.

A Brief Prehistory

To understand what I’m seeing, we need to explore how we got there. The real birth of the mega-toxic shipping culture was back around Kingdom Hearts 2. There was a fandom around the original game and COM era, but from what I’ve seen, it wasn’t as noxious as it was today with the shipping. I’ve seen S0ka! and S0wwiku (which is my new censored spelling you’ve gotta deal with). But not much else. 

The reason is simple and clean- there wasn’t much else to talk about. The game only added four original characters (Sora, Riku, Kairi, and Ansem SOD, the last of whom was ignored when Riku wasn’t in the room). The introduction of the original Organization XIII was the spark for the toxic fandom of the mid-to-late 2000s. 

I’m not 100% sure on the history for the CoM era, but it wasn’t long. There were only about 1-2 years (depending on your country) between CoM and KHII. That’s just enough time to get bored with speculating on the purpose of the Organization before you’re introduced to the whole boy band.

There were four years between KHII and 358/2 Days. Four years. Of basically nothing (remasters don’t count, and Coded was Japan-exclusive at the time). Armed with tons of pretty guys and free time, the bad seeds were able to sprout.

Ship wars. Character bashing. Creepy behaviors.

The Living Nightmare

I once knew this girl in real life who shipped akuw0ku religiously. Once, I went to a cosplay party dressed (sort of) as Roxas. She was there with a roll of duct tape. She chased me and tried to tie me up with duct-tape (she didn’t). But the thing that sticks the most with me is she didn’t call me by name while she did this.

She called me Roxas.

Most people were not as loose with their behavior in real life as her. But they were all over Internet spaces. Where- unrestrained by real life- they spit out the most toxic garbage you’ve ever seen. Age might have been a factor in this era. A lot of what went down could only be accomplished by bored teenagers. But the absolute deluge of horror was something I haven’t seen before or since.

The ship bashing and the insistence on pairings being canon was at an all-time high. “Evidence” was often based on purposefully mistranslated or false info. I believe the lie that Nomura insisted there were no romantic pairings in the series was created as an attempt at damage control. But there was just no stopping it.

“Consoled” by the “evidence”, people felt free to write OOC garbage using the seme/uke dynamic. Once the seme and uke positions were set, the characters could not leave them. Any person who attempted to criticize any of this was dogpiled. If they were targeting a gay ship- and they often were- they were instantly labeled as homophobic regardless of explanation. 

Some people were. Make no mistake. But a lot of people weren’t. Some people (i.e.- me) were new to fandom and didn’t understand slash shipping as a concept. I said things that probably were homophobic without understanding (I was 14-ish). I probably shouldn’t have said those things. But every conversation eventually became a fight for my life. After a single rebuttal, I was always personally attacked. No-one noticed I was a fresh fish in the pond. No-one tried to explain to me.

“Don’t like don’t look” wasn’t used as good fandom advice or for safety. It was used as a weapon. This is why it took my years to accept it as valid advice.

The female characters got a lot less “love” than their male counterparts. When Xion was revealed, fans attacked her for the crimes of being a woman and “cockblocking” akuw0ku. All they had at the time was a picture and a name. Kairi faced such terrible abuse that there was legitimately a fic called “The Horrible Bloody Death of Kairi”, where Sora and Riku actually kill her. 

The reason was all down to shipping. Kairi/Xion existed to threaten or “de-canonize” the gay ships. So it was best if they didn’t exist at all.

I know Kairi- amongst most of the female cast- is poorly written. But the animal behavior of these people was still excessive. It wasn’t merely disliking a character. It was wanting them to suffer to the point of obsession. Never mind how their fans might feel about this behavior. I wonder if anyone who liked Kairi read or was messaged that wretched fic...

Shippers of this type were- in some places- a very vocal minority. But they ruled the roost. The rules were simple. The ship was law. What ship didn’t matter- it depended on what corner of the Internet you were in. The roles were set. The puppets played their parts. Move the puppets, object to the group, and you were incinerated like Vexen.

A Brief Dark Age

This nonsense continued through 358/2 Days up until around Dream Drop Distance. In 2012, it petered out. But from KHII to 3D, we got three games. 358/2 Days, Birth by Sleep, and 3D itself. But no properly numbered titles. No major releases.

358/2 Days/BBS was just enough of a drip-feed to keep the fandom beast alive, without really progressing Sora’s story. Terra and Ventus formed a new couple, but Aqua wasn’t as poorly treated as Kairi/Xion. People were maturing. Nature was healing. Once Sora’s story creaked forward with 3D, it came with tons of new lore to talk about. To obsess over. To focus on.

Something outside of shipping.

And then the dark age came. Not counting Re:Coded, we didn’t get a new game until 2019. I haven’t really monitored the fandom during this time. But they seemed to grow up a bit. With Kingdom Hearts 3, new ships- like Axel and Isa- rose up. But they never became cults. Seme/uke roles were lessened. Not gone, if they already existed. But definitely weaker.

We might be able to move on. Or so it seemed.

And Yet You Understand Nothing

We are in a new dark age. Sora’s story hasn’t progressed since 2019. We’ve gotten prequel upon mobile game. But time has yet to move forward. The last time I saw people get super excited was with the end of Union X. Dark Road also brought some chatter. But since Dark Road ended, we’ve just been waiting for KH4. It has no release date- just windows that will be moved several time. You know the game.

In the void, there’s nothing to talk about. Nothing but the old fallback. Nothing but shipping.

I’ve seen a return of the canon-grubbing cult. With nothing else to talk about but old content and shipping, it was only natural. Especially regarding S0wwiku.

Sora’s tag is about 95% S0wwiku right now. People in that tag want it canon so damn bad that they draw false conclusions, and bash female characters or rob them of their accomplishments. It’s the old game in a new era.

Some people- from what I understand- place their own experiences onto the characters. Which is fine. Okay. I get that. But the drive to be canon- to be right- is coming back in full force. I fear we could go back.

Ship wars. Character bashing. Creepy behaviors.

We can pretend we grew up, but these elements never really left us. In the void without new content, desperate for something to do, we cling to darkness. And darkness is the heart’s true essence...

Kingdom Hearts is Light- Advice for New Fans

I want to end this ramble with things I wish someone would have told me. If the evil really isn’t defeated, people will jump in blind. I want them to have a better, safer fandom experience than I did.

Gay ships are okay. They are someone else’s interpretation of the characters. They are allowed to have that opinion. You are not homophobic/a monster for not liking the ship, or having a different opinion.

If you don’t like something, don’t look at it. That’s not an attack. That’s for your safety. Click the back button. Close the tab. Block the person.

Your hatred of a ship or type of content will not make it disappear. Your comment will never make content you don’t like get deleted. Attacking the author of a fic with a pairing you hate will do nothing but hurt someone’s feelings.

Blocking is not cowardly. The block function exists to protect you. If a conversation is going south, or morphs into a personal attack, block them.

If you have a ship you really like, it doesn’t have to be “canon” or “right”. If the ship-cult is trying to insist that it is, be wary (they could be exaggerating in light-hearted fun). If they attack people with other opinions, cut ties or block.

A ship is not more important than other people’s feelings. Don’t attack people who ship something you don’t like. Don’t retaliate when people tell you to ship something you hate. Block them. On sight.

If you don’t like a character, think of their fans. There is a way to say you don’t like a character other than writing fics of that character being brutally murdered. 

On Tumblr, keep character or ship rebuttals out of their tag. Censor ship names or character names. This isn’t an “unalive” situation where using the full word is important.

Never, ever, ever bring the conversation out of the fandom and into personal attacks. For example, if someone says “I don’t like this ship”, your response shouldn’t be “kill yourself” or “you’re a bad person”. Your response should be ignoring them (if they are non-aggressive) or blocking them (if they are).

I’m going to make this section its own post, because I feel like it’s so important. We always believe that fans are seasoned veterans. We never account for people who just left the islands and are starting their adventure. It would be wrong to post this without addressing the facet of this issue that led it to scar me.

[averyauthorship]

15 questions tag!!

I saw people posting this, and most everybody said to treat it as an open tag, so I decided to do it too! Tagging (with no pressure at all!!) @mjparkerwriting @kainablue @karimac @melusinewrites @mayonnaisepudding and also ANYONE who wants to do it!

The concept for this is to write responses to the following questions as if you are your original character answering, or just as yourself. I haven't talked about myself much outside of my writing on here, so might as well do it now, right? So! Answering as me!

1 - Are you named after anyone?

My first name (Avery) was just a name my parents liked. My middle name is actually my grandmom's and my great grandmother's name. My mom didn't want to name me that as my first name because she thought it was better as a middle name. So that's my name!

2 - When was the last time you cried?

I cry A LOT. Over songs, commercials, movies, shows. I make myself cry sometimes because I think it's healthy to let it flow. I literally started tearing up at a book I was reading today. The last time I cried cried though (for real, not because of content or something) was when I had a super bad panic attack. I have OCD, and sometimes you get so panicked you just melt :(

3 - Do you have any kids?

Nope! I would like to have a couple in the future, though.

4 - Do you use sarcasm?

Ehh, I have tried. But I am not sarcastic. I'll do it as a joke sometimes when someone says something obvious about me (i.e. Whaaat? Me? Liking books? That's crazy!) but not in any real way.

5 - What's the first thing you notice about people?

Definitely the way they carry a conversation. If they interrupt people, seem rude or ill engaged. I like talking, but I realize that conversations involve two people. It's a big red flag when someone can't share a conversation.

6 - What is your eye color?

Brown! Lovely, if I do say so myself.

7 - Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings, no doubt. I can't actually handle scary movies (because of my OCD. Hate to blame everything on it, but it's definitely true. I ruminate way too hard on scary, violent things). I'm a sucker for a happily ever after! It's what I hope I can have one day, so I like seeing it in my media.

8 - Any special talents?

Besides writing (which I am learning to accept as a talent), I craft and sew for cosplay. I sing too, and I think I have a nice voice. I have a lot of hobbies, but I don't think most of those qualify as a "talent." I'm pretty dang good at building houses in the Sims. I think that's an underrated talent.

9 - Where were you born?

Maryland, USA

10 - What are your hobbies?

Ah, yes. I mentioned them before but let's list them: Cosplay (sewing and crafting and all that), reading, writing, drawing, painting, playing video games, baking, collecting items (is that a hobby? I do it so much I think it must be), jewelry making (it sounds so fancy but I just make little bracelets and earrings with shrink plastic sometimes).

11 - Do you have any pets?

My family does! We have four cats: Ash, Whistler, Taffy, and Pike. I grew up with cats, and I miss the ones we've lost every day. (RIP Rainier, Nauset, Odell, Asia, and Ebony.)

12 - What sports do you or have you played?

I am not a sports girly. Like AT ALL. But I did run cross country for a semester back in my freshman year of high school. I absolutely hated it. Instead, I picked up musical and children's theatre. That's almost a sport...? Generally, I like to swim and dance (I'm not good), but it's not like a "sport" really. Just for fun to move my body when I feel like it.

13 - How tall are you?

Honestly? No clue. Haven't measured in many years. Somewhere between 5'8" and 5'10" I would guess?

14 - Favorite subject in school?

I've always been really into English. (My dad was an English teacher so it was only natural.) Also, any English extracurricular like journalism and creative writing. I was actually a journalism major until halfway through college. I switched to focus on English and picked up minors in journalism and linguistics instead.

15 - Dream job?

I'm about to ship off to grad school to get my masters in library sciences, so the hope is to become a librarian. It's realistic, so I'm excited to do that someday! On the side, I really hope to be a published author. I don't expect to make much money (if any) but I just want to get my work out there for people to find if they need it.