#if he really wanted to sink the ship why is she still in his heart station in remind? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

crushribbons · 1 month ago

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𝖈𝖗𝖚𝖘𝖍𝖙𝖔𝖇𝖊𝖗 (𝖓𝖔. 𝖎𝖛)

prompt: [ ARRANGED ] muses are in an arranged marriage and now have to consummate the union (source)

char: sebastian sallow [hogwarts legacy] x fem!oc

warnings: non-orphan richboy seb au (but not in a happy way i'm sorry), SMUT (18+ ONLY), unprotected penetrative sex, mentions of pregnancy, kinda antiquated marriage talk but he still #respectswomen

a/n: halloween wedding in a gothic castle with sebastian sallow. oh wait this isn't my vision board hang on

The handkerchief hit her in the face before his words did: "Stop that." She sniffed loudly. "Enough snivelling. You think I wanted this?" Sebastian Sallow, the heir to his parent's enormous fortune and most desirable bachelor in England, towered over her while he looked down with disdain at her weeping.

Sebastian Sallow, her new husband.

The wedding had been a balance of pain and mercy, the very brief service almost quick enough for her to forget that she was being forced into a loveless relationship with this man she'd never met before. His father had gruffly muttered something in Sebastian's ear before shoving him at her as she stood at the altar.

When the priest had prompted them to mumble "I do" at each other, a sob had snagged in her chest, which made Sallow scowl at her. A wonderful omen for my marriage, she thought, somewhat hysterically.

Now, she cowered on the beautiful duvet of the bed she and her husband were supposed to consummate the marriage in, but all her husband seemed interested in was brooding out the window at the sinking sun. Twilight was settling around the grounds of the castle that the Sallow dynasty had provided for their wedding.

She had no desire to do what was expected of her. The idea of her wedding night had always excited her, but it was never meant to be shared with a virtual stranger.

Although, in fairness to the virtual stranger...She found her heart rate slowing as she watched Sebastian frown down upon the grounds. There were much uglier men that her family could have thrust upon her. She'd heard that he'd been something of a ladies' man during his school years, though because of her parents' decision to ship her off to Ilvermorny, she did not know how accurate the wild rumors about the Sallow boy really were.

He spoke at last, and her eyes, which had been meandering down his body while he stretched an arm to rest on the window frame, snapped up to his face. "I suppose we are expected to..." His teeth clenched together.

"I suppose so," she agreed. Sallow didn't seem particularly keen on the idea of taking his new, young wife to bed. She wondered if there was someone else, someone she'd now prevented him from being with. The thought made her a little sad; why, she wasn't sure.

Sebastian sighed. Some of the tensity in his shoulders dissipated as he finally turned from the window to look at her. "I'm sorry," he said, and her heart broke.

She rose from the bed, her ostentatious wedding gown making every action more difficult. When she took a step closer to him, her shoe caught on the hem and she tripped forward, but two warm hands wrapped around her forearms and caught her. She looked up to see Sebastian, inches away from her face. His eyes were hazel, she learned in that instant, and she thought that they might be very nice eyes to wake up to.

"You look beautiful, by the way," he muttered. "Are beautiful, I mean." She blushed. Sebastian cleared his throat and ran his thumbs up and down the soft skin of her arms. He had pulled his tie off the second they'd entered the room and cast it down on the floor, and the small patch of his throat and collarbone that were exposed by his open collar made something in her chest flutter. If we absolutely have to seal this wedding night, I could be convinced...

"We barely know each other," she whispered, feeling as though she had to acknowledge that fact, more for herself than him, because he was so attractive that she worried it was turning her head. Sebastian nodded.

"So why do I want to throw you down on that bad and ravage you so badly," he asked without the inflection of a question. His voice was low and scraped up her body in a way that made every nerve combust, as if she were a match he was lighting. He slid his hands up her arms, feeling every bit of lace between his fingers along the way, until he was cradling her face.

She could feel his breath against her lips when he said, "Tell me to stop if you don't want to do this. I know we're meant to–" He broke off and swallowed thickly, not wanting to even say the word "baby", though they both knew what was expected of them, "–but I want to make you feel good. Tell me to stop." She answered him by closing the space between their mouths.

Sebastian moaned prettily into the kiss, his fingers digging into the sides of her face as he gripped her tighter and laved his tongue across hers. He tasted like the champagne they'd both reluctantly sipped at dinner. At the time, it hadn't felt like much of a celebration.

But now, as they broke apart, panting, and began tugging their stiff finery off, she felt the party had really begun.

Her bare back hit the bed and a little "oof!" popped out of her, but her giggles were quickly swallowed when Sebastian climbed on top of her with his own wolfish grin. "I thought you'd be horrible," he admitted as he kissed a ring around her neck and chest.

"And I thought you'd be an ugly old man," she half-lied through a smile of relief, and Sebastian snorted against her skin.

"Looks like we both got a nice wedding present then, didn't we?" His fingers tickled teasingly around her hips, making her back arch off the bed in an attempt to make him touch her where she needed. They were still in their undergarments, and a wave of embarrassment washed over her when Sebastian hooked a finger in the top of her slip and tugged it down over her breasts, but the look of reverent amazement on his face as he gazed at her pushed any shame far from her mind. She was dripping wet, she could feel it. He pushed a lazy finger into her without warning and she gasped, Sebastian's grin widening until she saw every one of his straight, white teeth.

As he pulled his–God, impressive cock from his pants and gave it a few languid strokes, she looked up at him and thought, Fuck, I can't believe I'm married to this man. The thought manifested itself verbally when he lined himself up at her entrance and sank into her, thick inch by thick inch, and she whimpered, "My husband..." "My pretty little wife," he affirmed immediately, pressing his forehead to hers and moving his hips in a light circle while her tightness subsided. "So fucking gorgeous. I'm gonna be buried inside you every damn night." His head shot up, his cheeks dusted pink despite the compromising position. "If you'll have me, that is."

"Yes, Seb, I'll have you!" She laughed and groaned, and Sebastian seemed unable to hold himself back any longer. He grabbed her under her knees so he could wrap her legs around his waist, and then his hands were on either side of her shoulders and he was driving into her like their lives depended on it.

"Fuck. God, fuck." He muttered to himself on every thrust. The lamps casting low orange light all over the room were beginning to burn low, and the fireplace sat cold and empty, since they'd never called for anyone to light it. Sebastian's face was cast in half-shadow as he lowered his head and pressed kisses to her face. Her fingers tangled, one in the disturbed sheets they fucked on top of, and one in the hair at the base of her husband's neck.

A tight column of pressure was rapidly unraveling in her stomach, and she suspected Seb might be close as well, as the rhythm of his hips stuttering and slowing suggested. "N-keep going, please, I'm so close," she cried, her nails digging into the nape of his neck. He whined a little but picked up his pace once more until the antique headboard was pounding into the wall. Sebastian reached up and steadied himself against it with one hand, the other returning to the back of her leg as he pulled their bodies flush.

He looked down at the filthy sight of his cock sliding in and out of her, covered in her wetness, and said hoarsely, though with composure (like the well-bred gentleman he was), "I'm, shit, I'm going to–ahh!" Her orgasm hit both of them like a tidal wave, ripping through her body until she screamed and shuttered, her cunt pulsing around him. "Fuck!" Sebastian yelled. "Where do you want me, quickly!"

"Inside, it's alright," she assured him, but part of her stiffened in fear. She may have been relieved to find that her husband wasn't disgusting and had an incredible amount of sexual stamina, but the idea of falling pregnant with his baby, the baby his parents wanted so much more desperately than he did, terrified her.

Sebastian shook his head, biting down on the side of his mouth and refusing to look at her. Then he gave one final, loud groan and pulled out of her with an almost pained expression marring his flushed visage. With three quick strokes of his hand, he came on her stomach, ropes of cum painting her torso and chest as he took in the entire scene with his mouth opened in a perfect "o".

He collapsed next to her with promises that he'd clean her up in a minute, just a minute, he just needed a minute after all that. She giggled a little, too lost in the thick haze of sex that hung over the four-poster bed to care about the mess on her stomach. She glanced down at it.

That's not what a dutiful son whose been instructed to produce heirs does. Perhaps Sebastian wasn't as duty-minded as his station suggested.

When they drifted off in each other's arms later that night, stars out in full force and moonlight filtering in the window and over their bed, she murmured into his neck, "Good night, Seb." She lifted her head slightly to look at his peaceful face. His eyes were already shut. “Oh. Is it alright if I call you that?” The realization that she still had only just met this man came rushing back. A small smile twitched at the corner of his mouth.

"More than alright. G'night, darling."

#these are getting longer and longer i am so sorry 😭😭#sposed to be QUICK SNAX!!!!#anyway husband seb you have made a permanent residence in the batch of sebs that circles my brain constantly welcome #sebastian sallow fic #sebastian sallow smut #hogwarts legacy fic #sebastian sallow x reader #laneywrites #crushtober

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swaps55 · 19 days ago

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Please I have to know! Do you have any other ‘what we choose’ multiverse first kiss scenes in-progress/in your mind/etc? I just reread the moment between them when Kaidan’s putting on Sam’s N chain and sjsksjsjsk

Apologies for making you wait, but since I didn't have the heart to tell you that I didn't have one cooking, I just wrote one. <3

This may start out looking familiar to you. Until it doesn't. :D

In Your Universe

02 December, 2182, Arcturus Stream, Arcturus, Arcturus Station

A steady crowd of people mill through the observation deck on the Callisto section of Arcturus’ torus ring. This time Kaidan knows where he’s going, but even though he’s a few minutes early, the buzz of Shepard’s biotic field slips under his skin before he spies the small opening in the wall just below the ceiling. The only difference between now and that morning almost four years ago is the souvenir shop where the empty storefront used to be.

Shepard pokes his head out of the alcove and holds out his hand for Kaidan to grab. No biotic energy to pull him up this time – Kaidan brings his own momentum. But Shepard’s pull is still stronger, and for half a heartbeat Kaidan winds up in his arms. He clears his throat as they disentangle, and settles beside him in this strange little architectural oddity that’s a perfect fit for two people to sit and watch the stars.

“Still beautiful,” Kaidan murmurs, looking out the window. He mostly means the view.

“Never lets me down, I’ll give it that,” Shepard admits. He pushes a datapad out of the way and stuffs a stylus in his pocket.

“Been here long?” Kaidan asks. “Didn’t mean to keep you waiting.”

“Nah. Needed some time to do a little thinking. Been a hell of a day, and it’s not over yet.”

Kaidan sticks one foot out in front of him, so it hangs just off the ledge. “Yeah. New rank, new ship, new crew. What did you think?”

Shepard ducks his head, hiding a smile behind a fist. When had Kaidan first seen him smile like that? It should stand out in his memory, but it doesn’t. Sometimes it feels like there have never been any firsts with Shepard. They’ve just always been.

“The ship’s pretty incredible. You’d have a field day. She’s got stealth tech.”

“Stealth? Really?”

He nods. “Get this. It’s a cross-species effort with the turians.”

“Huh.”

“The chief engineer threw a lot of jargon at me, but the long and short of it is, she’s got an internal emissions sink system that stores waste heat. She can run silent for close to three hours before the crew is in danger of cooking.”

“Damn. I’m guessing wherever they plan on sending you won’t be lacking for action.”

“Not from what I gather. Crew is hand-picked. She’s small, fast, top of the line, and you would hate the pilot.”

Kaidan snorts and leans back on his elbows. “Why would I hate the pilot?”

“Just trust me.”

“Okay,” Kaidan says with a wry smile. “Guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”

There must be a little more misery in his tone than he intends, because Shepard’s expression sobers, and the gravity well flips.

“Anderson’s the CO,” Shepard says, right before the quiet that settles between them starts to get heavy.

Kaidan’s eyes widen. “Oh, that’s great, Shepard. Really great.”

“Should make things interesting, that’s for sure. I sure can drive him batshit. Wonder how long before he wants to put me out the airlock.”

“He thinks the world of you, Shepard. You know that right?”

Shepard shrugs a shoulder and pulls the stylus out of his pocket, twirling it in his fingers. “Lot to live up to, still.”

“Hey. You’ve worked so hard for this. And you’re going to get to do it with the person who means the most to you. Enjoy it, okay? At least for a minute. This is everything you wanted.”

Shepard looks at him, right at him, eyes so clear and sharp there can’t possibly be anything Kaidan can hide.

“Yeah. Guess it is.”

Maybe the hint of regret in his voice isn’t real, just Kaidan hearing what he wants to hear. Just like the hand on his shoulder at the café didn’t mean anything, the damn crooked pin at the ceremony had just been harmless banter, and the way Shepard’s looking at him right now is just Shepard.

That’s what he always tells himself.

What if it is something? His stomach churns with a rush of exhilaration and anxiety. What would you do if I told you the truth? If I kissed you, would you push me away, or put your arms around me and tell me not to stop?

But then Shepard drops his eyes and the moment’s gone. He shoves the stylus back in his pocket, scowls, and digs something else out and holds it up to examine. It’s a chain, for a dress uniform, but black instead of the regulation gold. Just like the one Shepard already has on, linking the top button of his jacket with the gold trim of the shoulder pad. The chain worn by anyone who’s achieved N status – the only adornment allowed by anyone who isn’t N7.

Kaidan raises a curious eyebrow as Shepard rolls it between his fingers, the gaze that moments ago had only been for Kaidan now bent elsewhere.

“Did you bring an extra this time?” Kaidan asks, trying not to smile. The last time Shepard had taken that dress coat off, after the N7 ceremony, he’d forgotten to undo the chain first and snapped it in half.

He shakes his head. “My mom gave it to me today. It…was my dad’s.”

Oh.

“Why today?” Kaidan asks. “Why not when you made N1?”

His laugh is bitter. “She didn’t know she had it. She never went through his things.”

“Oh,” Kaidan says softly. “I’m sorry, Shepard.”

“It’s just a chain,” he says with a shake of his head, and starts to shove it back in his pocket. “Never been the sentimental type, anyway.”

Kaidan stops him, leaning in close enough the sharp hum of their mingled fields leaves him a little lightheaded. Shepard’s lips hover close, too close while Kaidan detaches the chain on his uniform. When he drops it in Shepard’s open palm and takes the one that belonged to his father, an electric shock passes through their fingers. Kaidan swallows, makes the mistake of glancing up at those eyes that may as well hold the depth of the stars inside, then fastens the chain carefully in place. Throughout, Shepard watches him in silence that feels like it means something.

“Thanks,” Shepard says softly.

Kaidan traces the chain with a finger, lump growing in his throat, all the times Shepard had nearly killed himself chasing N7, carving the path that’s now leading him away from the ‘Yang to Anderson and the Normandy flashing in front of his eyes.

They’re sending you somewhere I can’t protect you.

Like a reflex, he splays his hand against Shepard’s chest. There’s still an undershirt, dress jacket and dress uniform between them. Sometimes it seems like there’s so much standing between them, even when they’re side by side, and that space is about to become so vast.

But he can still feel Shepard’s heartbeat. Not a number in his HUD. Just a steady rhythm under his palm. He draws in a ragged breath.

“I don’t want to lose you.”

The words are out before he can stop them.

He curls his fingers against the fabric of Shepard’s uniform, trying to break the spell, trying to pull away while he still can, but instead Shepard cups his knuckles, trapping them in place.

He’s always been trapped in Shepard’s gravitational pull. There’s never been any other star he’s wanted to orbit.

“Hey,” Shepard says. “Kaidan, I…”

Without giving himself time to think about what it could cost them, he hooks Shepard’s neck with his other hand and erases the space between them.

Kaidan does little more than brush their lips together, so quick and reckless he almost misses. It’s nothing like what he's imagined in the rare moments where he let himself imagine anything at all. But when they part it’s only by inches. He can’t bring himself to move farther away.

But Shepard doesn’t move either.

They hover nose to nose. Shepard sits still as a stone, breath warm against Kaidan’s cheek, gaze unfocused, like the galaxy has just reordered itself around him. When he finally manages to speak, it's with a voice Kaidan's never heard before.

"Oh."

Kaidan inhales, the reality of what he’s just done setting in hard. “I’m sorry,” he says hastily, trying to scramble away, trying to think of a way to fix it, but Shepard tightens his grip on Kaidan’s hand, keeping it pressed against his chest. His eyes glitter like the stars in front of them, though reading his expression is like being on the wrong side of a two-way mirror. For agonizing seconds, he doesn’t say a word.

“Oh,” he repeats, softer this time, eyes dropping to Kaidan’s mouth. The gap between them narrows until it doesn’t exist.

The kiss starts awkward, hesitant, like they’re a flickering candle that can’t get enough oxygen to catch. But then Shepard’s head tilts to the left ever so slightly, and suddenly…it does.

Shepard’s lips part wider, drawing Kaidan in, before returning to something chaste, like he’s testing what it means, how it feels. Kaidan goes with it, he’ll go anywhere Shepard leads, so long as they go there together.

The gravity well swirls with a gentle hiss of static. Shepard’s fingers curl around the hand Kaidan still splays against his chest, like an anchor locking them together. Kaidan traces the back of Shepard’s neck with a thumb, catching the stubble of freshly shaved hairs at the base of his hairline.

In the space of heartbeat, kissing Shepard is as effortless as breathing. Soft, slow, with only the stars as a witness. They take their time, letting it grow around them, taking its own shape, until it feels familiar. Theirs. Callisto buzzes with the sounds of conversations, life, and laughter taking place below them. But here, in this little pocket of time and space Shepard has carved out for them, there is only the warmth of his mouth, the hum of his biotic field, the beat of his racing heart.

It’s racing for me.

Kaidan grips the front of Shepard’s uniform, black chain tangling in his fingers, still trapped under Shepard’s hand.

I was made for you, Kaidan thinks as Shepard slips an arm around him.

But that isn’t true, is it? There is nothing predestined about it. Nothing written in the stars.

Only what they’d spent four years writing themselves.

When they finally part they rest their foreheads together, breathless. Shepard’s eyes flick to Kaidan’s. He reaches a hand up, hesitates, then gently runs his fingers through Kaidan’s hair. Kaidan closes his eyes and breathes deep.

“That felt…like something we should have done a long time ago.”

A laugh slips out of Kaidan. Not quite the reaction he’d planned, not that he’d had anything planned. But at the sound of it, Shepard’s face lights up like the sunrise.

“When, um. When the hell were you gonna tell me you could kiss like that?”

A flush builds at the back of Kaidan’s neck. “Didn’t, uh. Didn’t think it was relevant to your, uh, interests.”

“My fucking interests.” Shepard’s turn to laugh. “You dick.” He wraps Kaidan up in a tight embrace. Kaidan hooks an arm around his neck, the way they’ve done so many times for helmet checks, always with armor in the way.

No armor now.

“I’m sorry,” Kaidan says, head buzzing with a mix of euphoria, elation, and dread. In a matter of hours, Shepard is supposed to report to a new ship. “My timing for this is really terrible.”

“Epically terrible, are you kidding me?”

Kaidan huffs. “Well, I planned to take it to my grave, but it turns out going back to the ‘Yang without you wasn’t…something I could do.”

Shepard pulls away from him, expression turning solemn. Kaidan tries to look away, but Shepard catches his chin in his fingers and holds his gaze.

“You weren’t going to tell me. You were just gonna let me walk onto another ship and not say anything. Why? You’re—” His face scrunches up as several different emotions pass across it at once. “Why.”

“And risk losing you, because I wanted something you didn’t?” Kaidan scoffs. “No. You’re the best thing I’ve ever had in my life. I just wanted to…be in your universe, I guess. Whatever that looked like. Whatever that meant…to you. If it didn’t mean, well—”

“Making out with me.”

Kaidan rolls his eyes. “Fine, if it didn’t mean making out with you…so be it. We part ways here, and I hope like hell you call me every now and then so I can still hear your voice.”

Shepard waggles an eyebrow. “So you’re into my voice, too, huh?”

“You know what, never mind,” Kaidan says, stifling a grin. “Forget it. I’m finding another hiding spot where I can spill my guts to someone who isn’t the actual worst.”

Shepard seizes hold of him with a laugh that’s light as a bell and pulls him in close until his back is pressed against Shepard’s chest, and presses his nose to Kaidan’s ear.

“You idiot. You are my universe.”

A shiver runs down his spine. Shepard might have a point about the voice thing. The low resonance of it in his ear is…well, it’s fucking exhilarating. He grips Shepard’s arm, closes his eyes, and exhales. “Kinda feels like we’ve been saying that to each other for four years now.”

“Maybe it’s time we finally listened to ourselves.”

Kaidan turns his head and kisses him again, deep and slow.

“Fuck, I’m a great listener,” Shepard murmurs when they part. Kaidan laughs, and Shepard’s grin gets even wider.

There is no star that shines like you do.

Shepard’s omnitool flashes. He dismisses the notification with a grunt, using the opportunity to rearrange his limbs into a more comfortable shape. A shape that includes Kaidan. His head spins.

“Something you need to deal with?” Kaidan asks, nodding to his omnitool.

“Later. Don’t worry about it.”

“Come on, I worry about everything.”

“Yeah, I love that about you.”

Shepard’s eyes widen the moment the words are out of his mouth. Kaidan’s heart does a somersault.

“Um,” Shepard stammers. “What I meant was…” He stops. Shakes his head. “No. That’s, uh. That’s what I meant. I think I love a lot of things about you. Everything, probably. You’re—”

Kaidan cuts him off. Continuing to exist in a galaxy where the words haven’t been said out loud is something he can’t stand anymore.

“I love you.”

It’s the truest, boldest, most honest thing he’s ever said in his life.

Shepard gazes at him, poleaxed, then chuckles weakly. “Well. We’re just having revelations all over the place today, aren’t we?”

“Figured a few more couldn’t hurt.”

“No. I…think kind of the opposite. It’s, ah.” His face relaxes a little. “It sounds kind of amazing. Something I didn’t know I wanted to hear.”

“I love you,” Kaidan repeats, softer this time.

Shepard holds him tighter, resting his head on Kaidan’s shoulder. For a few minutes, they just sit in each other’s arms and watch the stars.

So many stars, home to so many worlds. Humanity had ventured out into the night sky and found new life, new constellations, new technology that had taken them to more stars, where they built new homes in alien frontiers. And somehow, through it all, I still managed to find you.

Some days the galaxy feels so big. Other times…it doesn’t.

“You know,” Shepard says quietly. “The day I first brought you here…I almost didn’t.”

“Oh?”

A wistful smile tugs at his lips. “I thought if I didn’t say anything, maybe you’d give up and go away and I could be left the hell alone. It was a miserable day for me. Last thing I wanted was someone else to see it.”

“What…changed your mind?”

“I knew you. You’re stubborn as hell and never give up when you’re set on something. I was doomed to never know peace.”

Kaidan chuckles.

“And you were—” He hesitates. Kaidan gives him space to put his thoughts together. “I grew up coming to this spot. Never told anyone about it. It was mine. No one could find me when I came here. But then…you did. And I realized…I wanted you to. Felt your field and was actually relieved that maybe I wasn’t going to be miserable…alone.” He laughs weakly. “Yeah, looking back, this is pretty obvious and I’m kind of an idiot.”

“I love that about you,” Kaidan says softly.

Shepard presses a kiss to his temple, but that’s not enough. Kaidan turns his head and kisses him like he means it. Shepard makes a sound that goes straight to Kaidan’s groin.

Which is when reality sets in. Kaidan pulls back and drops his gaze, fingering the black chain on Shepard’s uniform. “So…I just, ah. Made things a lot more complicated.”

“We. Team effort, here.”

“We,” Kaidan repeats. “Guess it could be worse. Could have done it while you were still my superior officer.”

Unease flicks past Shepard’s face. He shifts restlessly. “Yeah, that would, uh, make things a little more complicated.”

Kaidan gives him a wan smile and traces the line of his jaw with his fingers, something he’s never done before, and hopes to do a thousand more time. “What do we do now?”

“How about we worry about now later? You’re the one who said I should just enjoy things for a minute.”

This is everything you wanted.

Kaidan settles back against him and exhales. Shepard wraps his arms around him. A few hours ago, the future had felt so bleak. As empty as the space between all those stars.

Leave it to Shepard to shine bright enough to fill up the gaps.

“Thanks,” Kaidan murmurs.

“For what?”

“For not turning me away that day.”

The gravity well hums as Shepard leans in and kisses him again, the way it only does when their fields collide.

“Thank you…for staying.”

#swaps replies #Anonymous #mass effect #mshenko #kaidan alenko #otp: after all this time #my fic #opus!verse #well #opus!multiverse #first kiss au

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minminyoonjii · 4 months ago

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hey! how are you? i hope you’re doing well :D

i just found your account yesterday and can’t stop reading everything on your masterlist i recently started getting into fan fiction and i love your writing style so much!

idk if your requests are open since i’ve never done this before but i wanted to make a request for ot8 caregiver!stray kids and little f!reader where they help the reader fall asleep because she’s been really stressed lately.

take your time if you do choose to write about this <33

❤️Ultimate Masterlist

💜Rules and Guidelines

🧡Stray Kids Scenarios Masterlist

🌹CW

💌 This is a work of fiction, I by all means don't force ship anyone. They have the right to love whomever they want.

🍄Wordcount: 1.3K

Bang Chan

"What are you doing up, hm? It's past your bed time, little one," Chan whispered, stroking your hair. You clutched your plush tight, "Bed uncomfy," you grumbled, kicking off your blanket. Chan studied your behavior, "Do you want to sleep in your crib today?" he asked, thinking perhaps your bed felt too big. You reluctantly nodded, "But crib is for babies," you murmured, curling up. Chan easily lifted you in his arms, "Little ones' like you have special powers. They can sleep anywhere they want," he said, kissing your forehead. You looked up at him, "Really, Daddy?" you asked, innocent curiosity sparkling in your exhausted eyes. Chan chuckled, laying you down in the crib, "Of course, baby," he whispered, tucking the blanket to your sides and placed your plush right back in your arms. A big yawn escaped past your lips. "Eepy baby," Chan cooed, brushing back your hair. You nuzzled into your plush, your eyes droopy from sleep. A soft smile etched his lips, "Shh, shh, shh. Just close your eyes, baby. Daddy will be right here," he whispered, gently coaxing you to sleep.

Lee Minho

"Cupcake? Where have you gone?" Minho called out, looking around the dorm. You bit you bottom lip, hiding to silence your weak sniffles. Minho caught notice of your sounds, "Mama's not mad that you're still awake. He's just very worried, cupcake," he whispered, following the soft sniffs. He pulled back the curtain, only to see you curled up beneath with your face buried within plushie. "Aigo-yah. Who made my little cupcake cry, hm?" he cooed, carrying you against his chest. Your sniffles, broke his heart. "Tell mama what's wrong. Little cupcakes like you shouldn't have to struggle alone," he coaxed, hoping you'd talk. "Can't eep," you whispered, nuzzling his shoulder. Minho sighed in relief, "Did you get frustrated?" he asked, kissing your forehead. You nodded, your eyes heavy from crying. Minho bounced you in his arms, "Mama's here now. You can sleep, my little cupcake," he whispered, bouncing you until your soft snores echoed within his ears.

Seo Changbin

"Baba!" you wailed, alerting Changbin's panic. "Are you hurt? Are you okay?" he questioned, examining your entire body. You sniffled, looking up at him, "Baba, help," you whispered, scarying him even more. Changbin felt his heart sink, "Oh, agi-ah. What can Baba do, agi?" he whispered, wiping your tears. You wrinkled your nose, "Baba eep wif me," you slurred, sleep begging you to rest but the stress kept you restless. Changbin bit back a chuckled, "Aww, you couldn't sleep, agi?" he whispered, tucking himself next to you. "Ahm," you hummed, burying yourself into his strong safe hold. "You're going to be the death of me," he whispered under his breath. You curled up against his chest, soft snores leaving your exhausted body. Changbin kissed your cheek, "Sweet dreams, uri agi-ah," he whispered, falling asleep with you.

Hwang Hyunjin

You tossed and turned in your bed. Annoyance growing gradually as you lose more and more minutes of sleep. Hyunjin opened your door to check up on you. What he didn't expect was a glaring little one. "Lovely, why are you still awake?" he whispered, walking towards you cautiously. "I hate you," you grumbled, frustrated with everything within your vicinity. Hyunjin's eyes widen, "We don't say hate in this household, love," he said, trying to correct your behavior when you threw Jiniret right at his chest. "Go away!" you exclaimed, angry tears forming in your eyes. Hyunjin sighed and carried you up, "I think you need some fresh air," he said placing you plush on your chest. You squirmed in his hold, "No, no, no!" you sniffled, restless from underlying stress and frustration. Hyunjin grunted but held you tighter, "Look up, lovely," he whispered, walking out the back door. You clenched your jaw and did as told. The sight of stars and the cool night breeze surrounded you in a comforting embrace. You rubbed your eyes, sleep latching on your eyelids. Hyunjin exhaled in relief as you began drifting off, "Sleep well, naughty love. Papa knows you best," he whispered, enjoying the night breeze with you in his arms.

Han Jisung

You exhaled deeply, your joints aching "Hhgh," you whined. You grabbed your plush and waddled your way towards Jisung's room. "Appa," you whispered, knocking on his door. Jisung opened it with a worried expression, "What's wrong, sweetheart?" he asked, letting you into his room. You fidget your fingers, "Can't sleep," you whispered, your anxiety weighing heavy on your chest. Jisung gave you a sympathetic smile, "Well, you don't have to sleep right away, sweetie. Do you want to watch a movie with Appa?" he asked, setting up his phone stand. You nodded, "Can we watch Totoro?" you whispered, crawling onto the bed. Jisung opened his arms, "Of course, sweetheart. Come here, come into Appa's comfy arms," he chuckled, seeing you plop yourself right on his chest. Jisung gave you a big squeeze, "One studio ghibli, coming right up," he said, kissing your nose as you both watched the movie.

Lee Felix

"Oh my goodness, sunshine. It's way past your bedtime," he chastised, taking your phone from you. "But-," you said, only to get cut of by Felix's stern tone. "No buts, little sun. The moon has come out to play so little lights like you should be resting in bed," he said, gently tucking you back in. You stared up at him, "I don't feel comfy," you mumbled, tossing and turning for a comfortable spot. Felix pursed his lips, "How about this, mommy will carry you to the couch. You get yourself all comfy like you usually do for nap and if you manage to fall asleep in that position, mommy will carry you back to bed after a few hours," he said, knowing sometimes you needing a more confined place to sleep in. You nodded and raised both your arms. Felix chuckled, carrying you with your favorite plush, "Now let's get our little sunshine the rest they deserve," he whispered, pampering kisses on your face as he goes.

Kim Seungmin

Your head throbbed, hindering your sleep. You crawled out of bed and wobbled to the kitchen for a medkit, "There," you whispered, taking out some pain killers. Seungmin stood behind you, "Why are you still up?" he asked, scaring you into dropping the pills. You flinched, "Seung, you scared me," you whispered, holding your pounding chest. He chuckled and picked up the pills scattered around, "Sorry but you have yet to answer my question," he said, handing you the medicine. You blew on them and took them, "I had a headache," you whispered, rinsing your glass. Seungmin nodded, "Do you need my help? Dada has ways to sooth his little munchkin," he said, rubbing your nape. You gulped, "Dada don't mind?" you whispered, slowly slipping into the comfortable headspace you love. He shook his head, "Dada doesn't mind at all," he reassured, rinsing your pacifier and clipped it against your pyjamas. You immediately took it and popped it into your mouth. Seungmin chuckled and booped your nose, "Time for bed, little munchkin. Just relax, Dada has everything under control," he said, patting your head.

Yang Jeongin

"Ninnin," you whimpered, crawling into his lap. Jeongin pulled you close, "Are you feeling okay, angel?" he whispered, rubbing your tummy. You melted into his arms, "Body achy," you whispered, feeling the aftermath of your stress lingering in your body. Jeongin frowned, "That can't do," he said, laying you down the the couch. You buried your face into your plush, exhausted coaxing your mind. "Just relax, okay. You're in good hands, my little angel," he whispered, kneading your back and shoulder. Soft whines and gasps escaped your lips. Jeongin cooed, seeing your sleeping face, "That's it, just sink deeper and deeper into the feeling," he cooed, rubbing your calves and knees. You hissed when he massaged your knees, "Hah, owie," you whined, squirming away. Jeongin smiled softly, "Sorry, angel. Do you feel sleepy now?" he whispered, patting your bum like a parent would for an infant. You nodded, snoring softly as your drifted off to Dreamland.

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ringsreforged · 2 months ago

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Natalie's *deep* Haladriel thoughts - BEWARE

Pau - When you read this later, let me know if you want me to move it to my personal account, yeah? If it even still exists...

I’m not really sure what this post is going to end up being. A defence of the show and the separation? In part! A critique of the show based off leak spoilers and my own gut feeling? For sure! A desperate ramble in an attempt to get my head in order? Absolutely!

I will say before we dive in that I’m absolutely a Haladriel shipper, but the way I ship isn’t always in line with fandom. I ship what I see as part of the narrative because it’s the narrative, and everything else is a bonus. I make this distinction because I think this is why I’m so okay with a lack of scenes when some others are not, and I don’t want to come across preachy. I don't think I'm in any way superior for this by the way. In fact, I wish I could be more *normal*!!!!

If you came to this show for Haladriel alone, and simply want to see them share scenes week to week – that’s your prerogative. I’m not trying to say you shouldn’t feel that way. What I might try to say is that I don’t think that makes the shows bad or suggests that the writers have baited with this relationship. I think that’s ultimately what I find frustrating…

But anyway, let’s get into whatever this is. A reflection on expectations, a five-season arc, and those STUPID spoiler leaks…

AND THERE WILL BE SPOILERS. STAY AWAY. HISS.

Alright, so this post is mostly brought to you by a sinking feeling I have that the leak spoilers are real. Because everything in that episode 7 promo matches up.

STOP READING if you don’t want to know the spoilers. And honestly? STOP READING IF YOU THINK YOU WANT TO KNOW because living with this knowledge has truly made this season less enjoyable for me (credit to it, then, because I still think it’s incredible). IF I’M MAKING YOU PANIC, STILL STOP READING because there very much is a world where these spoilers aren’t that bad in context…but I prefer to keep my expectations low…

Have you gone???

HAVE YOU GONE?????

SPOILER TALK

Okay.

So, the leak spoilers say that there is no kiss between Sauron and Galadriel (which, honestly, I have no great issue with – more to come on that later). Instead, the kiss is ELROND AND GALADRIEL, and I absolutely do take issue with this.

I can only hope and PRAY that it works in context, but I can’t get my head around it. And yet, the promo…it’s all falling into place. Elrond will be sent to discuss terms with the orcs before the battle. He’ll see Galadriel in chains, and he’ll ask for a moment to say goodbye. Adar will allow it because he’s a gent like that. This is where we get the chin touch with the thumb everyone speculated over and then…HE LEANS IN AND KISSES HER TO PUT A NEEDLE IN HER MOUTH? SO SHE CAN RELEASE HERSELF LATER??

To clarify, most of this is my spec, but THE KISS TO PASS HER A NEEDLE IS A REAL LEAKED SPOILER THAT NO LONGER SEEMS FAKE.

It's just…so convoluted and weird??? Does he store needles in his mouth like a squirrel? Why couldn’t he have slipped the needle into her hand??? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING ELROND’S LIPS ON GALADRIEL’S?

And look, maybe this spoiler IS still fake! But the details were so specific, and everything about the context seems to be accurate, so that feels like it would be a bonkers coincidence to me. Maybe when we actually see it play out, it will be fine.

But that does bring me back to the Haladriel of it all, just briefly. With my whole heart, I do not need them to kiss. After season 1, I didn’t think it would be possible, and I’m okay with that. But if you’re willing to let ELROND’S lips touch her, then MY GOD, you could have let Haladriel have ONE kiss where she’s trying to distract him or some shit. OOF.

My only relief is that it happens next week, so we can hopefully get it out of our systems and enjoy the finale.

That said, if these leaks are true then that also means the finale leaks are true. Now, I actually never wanted to see any of these spoilers (hence me making it VERY CLEAR what this post is about, because I wouldn’t inflict this stress on anyone unwillingly), so once I got the Elrond kiss details, I tried to get away without seeing much else. But there was some information on the big Haladriel scene.

I’m actually not going to detail it here, because – overall – I think we’ll still super enjoy it (just…lower those kiss expectations) AND because I don’t think all of it was spoiled. At the end of the day, there will be plenty to unpack, they’ll be back on our screens, it will be meaty, it will be layered. I’m really looking forward to it, in general.

My one fear is that it’s a season 1 finale repeat. And again, that won’t necessarily be bad per se, but it will feel a little bit underwhelming. Now, I’m not somebody that wants a true corruption arc for Galadriel. Normally, I love that shit, but not in this IP and not with this character. I want to see her explore her darkness, I want to see her face it and accept it, and I certainly want to see her be tempted…but I don’t expect or believe we'll ever actually get the whole ‘dark queen of Mordor’ vibe. Prisoner? Maybe. But not an actual dark queen.

That said…surely this scene doesn’t play out the EXACT same way as season 1? Sauron shows her a vision, she’s tempted, but ultimately resists and tells him she’ll never be at his side. I just don’t get why we’d repeat that, when there are so many other options that still keep Gal on the side of light.

I keep coming back to Galadriel’s line to Elrond in episode 4 – when it comes down to it, he has to choose to defeat Sauron and sacrifice her. I feel like if I hadn’t seen the leaks, then I would be 1000% expecting this to be the outcome. Especially with how Elrond’s theme comes in at the end of The Last Temptation track. He comes upon the confrontation but chooses to do the thing that will harm Sauron in the long run, rather than the thing that will save Galadriel.

I hope so badly for this, but I do worry that it will go the other way. What if it parallels Gandalfanger’s destiny/friend choice, and Elrond chooses her because THAT is how light wins or some shit? Not that this will be a bad scene by any stretch – I love their relationship and want to see their FRIENDSHIP (grrrr) reforged…but, again, the S1 finale! Sauron left her in the water, and Elrond was there to save her.

There’s also Galadriel’s conversation with Adar in the most recent episode – you succumbed, I resisted – but I guess this could go either way? He succumbed, so she resists. She insists she’s able to resist, so she succumbs. URGH. MY HEAD.

There MUST be a difference. SURELY??? Like, this season has been so well written…I just can’t comprehend the copy and paste.

Again, this isn’t anything close to a deal breaker for me. I firmly believe the showrunners when they say this relationship will remain the core of the show, but…hmmm. Okay, on that note…

DAMAGE CONTROL – MOVING ONTO THE DEFENCE OF THE SHOW

So, this is where I want to get into some stuff that I just…don’t agree with that I’ve seen being thrown at the show by shippers. And I’ll reiterate here that I’m truly not telling anybody what to feel. You can hate the show for its choices and feel how you feel. You can express yourself in your social media spaces, and if anybody doesn’t like it they can mute/block/unfollow. This chunk isn’t really aimed at you guys.

This is more for other people like me, because I’m cursed to be somebody that generally wants to just…enjoy things for what they are, while also being susceptible to the mood of others. I want to scroll tags and have a good time, rather than see negativity because it lowers my mood (this isn’t just ship related by the way, I really love this show overall…it’s just this tag that has been impacting my mood most this season). Regardless of the nonsense that might be in episode 7, and even if the finale scene is a repeat of S1, I’m still going to want to focus on enjoying what we get, enjoying the narrative being told etc. So, for those of you that have a little sinking feeling in your gut after the first half of this post, hopefully this second half will help.

This isn’t a ‘typical’ ship. This is a true ENEMIES ARE ENEMIES dynamic where the bad boy is ultimately going to be (is already) pure evil, and where our heroine is the embodiment of light. There are certain things that we just have to accept when it comes to loving this dynamic as part of the show – there will never be another season like season 1. Nor should there be?

Do I wish for s3 to have them in close proximity for at least a few episodes? Of course! Do I think it’s possible with or without finale spoilers? Absolutely (given how quickly characters travel from place to place on this show, they could end the season at opposite ends of Middle Earth and this would still be on the cards…). I’m also anticipating Season 4 as a good time for them to be in full MIND PALACE mode – where the rings are all ringing, but Galadriel hasn’t yet worked out how to shut him out yet. By season 5, there might just be one final scene before the final battle. But, again, I really do think there needs to be a little bit of acceptance of that. Or, at least, expectation of it.

Something I really want to push back against is this idea that Haladriel was baited or teased, but the writers don’t actually care for it. Honestly, that’s nonsense to me on a couple of levels.

First of all, almost EVERY dynamic this season has been reduced to a handful of scenes here and there. The most consistent relationships have probably been Annatar and Celebrimbor, and Durin+Durin+Disa (off the top of my head). Elrond and Durin (probably the other most popular dynamic of S1) have been apart all season, Elrond and Galadriel have too. Isildur popped up to say hello and we might not see him again.

When you actually stop and look at this season…Sauron and Galadriel had to be separated. She could not be anywhere near him while he’s working Celebrimbor, and there’s no world in which they were ever going to change that narrative. And yet, the Sauron and Galadriel dynamic has been consistent across the season. With Galadriel predominantly (and depending on how the finale goes, I may have thoughts on this), but it has also been easier with her because people have talked with her openly about Sauron. It’s been harder on his side, but the fact that Mirdania seems to have been cast to look like Galadriel honestly – right now – feels like it was done with the express purpose of giving Sauron a Galadriel reference.

Again, I’m not saying you have to like the lack of scenes, but it’s not bad writing to respect the overarching narrative of an ensemble show. Galadriel’s season has been all about him, and we’ve had countless insights to make that clear – building up to their final confrontation. If Sauron was running around mentioning Galadriel every five seconds with Celebrimbor or with the dwarves, it would be horrendously out of character.

This next comment is…somewhat dependent on the finale…but as somebody that loves Elendil and Miriel, everything in Numenor has been somewhat crammed in. I would firmly argue that the Galadriel/Sauron dynamic across this season has been treated with care and reverence, all building to a climax designed as the high point of the season. Will we be 100% satisfied? Who can say! But it IS what the season is building to.

I think this brings me around to a particular gripe I have, and maybe the people that believe this came to the show after S1 had fully aired or something…but there’s this idea floating around that the showrunners don’t like this dynamic and are just giving it crumbs to bait people into watching. This makes me want to scream.

These showrunners literally took a few lines about Galadriel being tempted by Sauron and PITCHED THE ENTIRE SHOW OFF OF THAT. The Tolkien estate wasn’t only pitched by Amazon BUT CHOSE THIS PITCH OVER ANYTHING ELSE. Season 1 was written pretty much like a prologue centred around GALADRIEL AND SAURON HAVING A PERSONAL CONNECTION WITH ROMANTIC UNDERTONES…and guess what?

They wrote all that…they filmed ALL THAT…before knowing anything about the audience reaction! That was ALL the showrunners, the writers, the directors, the actors. They ARE the narrative. They are not bait.

Does that mean the fundamentals of their dynamic will always please you, individually? No, of course not. Some people want outright romance, some people want soft Sauron, some people want Dark Galadriel. Will they kiss? I doubt it. Do I wish they would? Sure! Will they be separated again next season? Probably! Will I also wish that they could at least be stuck together for a run of episodes again? Absolutely!

But the idea that any of this is bait, or unimportant to the show drives me a little bit bonkers.

I guess my personal feeling of frustration comes from the fact that I feel so lucky they are exploring this show from the perspective of this dynamic, regardless of specific details/scenes. I’d bet my house (I don’t own a house) that every other pitch hinged on Elendil or Isildur as the protagonists of the show. Now, I love those dudes, but just IMAGINE? The fact that we’re on this path at all is still WILD to me.

ANYWAY, this is what happens when Paulina goes on holiday and I have nobody to ramble too. Sorry for the explosion, but I’ve been dreading the stupid kiss spoiler since I stumbled on it after EPISODE BLOODY 3 and so I needed to vent somewhere.

TL;DR: You are welcome to feel the way you feel, and if you hate everything you go right ahead, but maybe this makes sense to somebody. IDK. IDK.

#rings of power #the rings of power #sauron #galadriel #halbrand #saurondriel #rings of power podcast #trop #haladriel #lotr rings of power #morfydd clark #charlie vickers

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coolprettyleo · 4 months ago

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know it's for the better - ryan leonard ☆

wc: 1.4k

tw: angst. endings. sad. crying.

ryan leonard x oc

death by a thousand cuts au

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

frankie stood in DC with a heavy heart.

she had taken the nearest plane out to talk to ryan when she realized her decision was final. hoping to try and salvage her relationship in any way she can, trying to stop the crashed ship from sinking.

the couple had been having problems ever since she made the move. they lacked communication, and that was the most dangerous territory to be in when it came to a relationship. she tried to tell herself it was only because they were busy, but even when they weren't, they still didn't really talk, and when they did it would end in an argument.

"I feel like we haven't talked in days," she said, propping the phone up on her makeup stand as she got ready to get some drinks with some friends.

"because we haven't," ryan said, basically snapping at her.

"i've been busy," she said looking at the phone to see ryan

"yeah but not busy enough for your friends," he said moodily as she furrowed her eyebrows.

"what's that supposed to mean?" she asked him, sensing he was pissed off at something, pissed off at her.

"who were those guys from your private story?" he asked her, talking about a TikTok she had made drunk the night before with a couple of new friends.

"these guys we met at the avenue; why?" she said, her eyebrows still furrowed as ryan sighed. he seemed to only sigh nowadays as if he was holding back from saying something.

"it's nothing. how was your day" he said, trying to change the subject, not wanting to argue but frankie was better than that to let it go, knowing it would just blow up in their faces later on. if only she knew what was to come.

"you're obviously mad about something, so I'm just going to let you go," she said, ignoring him as ryan sighed, once again; and hung up first before she could even hit the button.

ryan wasn't stupid. he knew he had an attractive girlfriend, and even though he trusted her, he still didn't like that they were hugging her; that was his girlfriend. insecurities that he never seemed to have began to claw at him like a cat and he didn't think he could handle it. but what was he supposed to say? that she can't have guy friends? he would never ever be that guy, so keeping it all bottled up was his answer. if only he knew.

___

frankie called ryan as she pulled into his hotel.

"hello?" he answered over loud music.

was he at a party? ryan didn't like parties.

"where are you?" she asked him

"the guys wanted to get some drinks, hold on," he said as he searched for a quiet place to hear her. part of her felt kind of annoyed he was partying when he never wanted to party with her.

"i'm in dc, outside your hotel," she told him straight forward.

"why didn't you tell me you were coming?" he said already bidding goodbye to his friends. he missed his girl, and he wanted nothing but to run into her arms, hoping that everything would feel okay again.

"it was very spur of the moment," she told him, but ryan could tell in her voice that there was something she wasn't saying.

"i'm five minutes away. don't you have work?"

"I have tomorrow off. but I have a shoot the day after that at 9," she told him as ryan sighed, once again. frankie couldn't help but think everything about her new life bothered him.

ryan soon pulled up and got out of the car. wearing a black t-shirt with some shorts, looking as handsome as ever. frankie almost forgot why she had come.

"hi" she said with a small smile

ryan looked at his girlfriend. she looked mature and as beautiful as ever. he didn't fail to notice the bags under her eyes as he pulled her into a hug.

"god, I missed you," he said, pulling away and giving her a sweet kiss that she had been longing far. she pulled away, knowing she had to tell him; she couldn't lie to him.

"I need to talk to you," she said with a hand on his chest as he looked down at her with furrowed eyebrows.

"okay," he said, nodding as he pulled her inside and took her up to his room.

"I'm rooming with chesley, but I don't think he'll be back tonight. he was talking up some blonde at the club," he said with a chuckle as frankie held a faraway look on her face.

"I'm not going back to BC," she blurted out as ryan turned to look at her, looking for any form of jokiness, but all he saw was his timid girlfriend in front of him.

"please say something," she said after all he did was stare at her like a kicked puppy.

"i don't- i don't know what to say to that," he said honestly.

"i know what you're thinking, and that this seems like it's the end for us, but it isn't ryan. i want to fight for us. I've only been so busy because I had to prove myself, but once I do, it'll die down. we can do this-" she said grabbing his hands as he did nothing but stare at her.

ryan wanted to believe her. he really did. but he felt nothing but like dead weight to her. he couldn't help but think he was holding her back. he could see it in her eyes, that she was the happiest she's ever been and he couldn't take that away from her.

he truly didn't know what to do. his eyes began to water as he looked away from her, praying to god he'd keep them at bay.

"I don't want to get in the way of your dreams," he finally said as she stared at him with a heartbroken look. they were sinking and she was holding on for dear life, but so was he.

"you aren't. we can do this, i know we can-"

"i don't think we can" he said shaking his head at her.

"ry-"

"I call you every day; you answer maybe once a week. that's not a relationship, and you know it" he told her as she looked down.

"what are you saying?" she said as her heart began to crack, afraid of his answer.

"I love you more than anything, frankie hughes. but I think we both know what I'm trying to say," he practically whispered, as if he was afraid she'd hear it, but she heard it loud and clear.

"so that's it? you're giving up? you're just going to push me away?" she said with a shaky voice with a hint of anger.

"im not pushing you away frankie, i'm holding on for dear life. i just won't keep feeling like some chore in your life. I want the world for you, and I don't think I'm a part of that anymore, at least not at this point in your life," he told her as she looked down. tears beginning to outline her face.

the two stood there shattering one another's hearts as they took deep and shaky breaths.

"please don't do this, ryan," she said after a long silence. if it was anyone else, she would be embarrassed, but here she stood begging the boy she saw as her best friend, her boyfriend. she'd beg forever, seemingly being the only thing left to do.

"I'm sorry," he said, looking anywhere but at her, not trusting himself, knowing he'd break and apologize forever. he knew he had to do this for her; it was for the better, and they both knew that.

frankie stood up and grabbed her bag as she walked over to the boy who held her heart and was letting it slip between his fingers.

"I love you, ryan," she said with nothing but pure emotion as the tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Ryan couldn't help himself and wiped them for her. he wanted nothing more but to wake up from this bad dream, but he knew this needed to happen; they needed to grow.

the freckled boy only wanted happiness for her life, even if it meant he wasn't a part of that. she kissed him sweetly one last time before walking out, out of his room, and out of his life. for seemingly forever.

#nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey fic #ryan leonard #bc hockey #frankie x ryan #ryan leonard x reader #ryan leonard imagine

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kaizokuniichan · 1 year ago

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Attention - Part 3: No Competition

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro/AFAB Reader (referred to as she/her)/Trafalgar Law

Summary: Zoro feels like you’re slipping away

CW: Vaginal Fingering

Previous Chapters: Part 1 Part 2

Next Chapters: Part 4 Part 5

Word Count: 3.3k

MDNI; 18+ readers please

(Divider by @cafekitsune Banner by @/eelnoise

Something had happened between you and Law, Zoro could feel it. From what he could tell, the dynamic between you two had shifted, and he didn’t think you even realized how obvious it was. Without the bite of animosity, he and Zoro would lock eyes, analyzing who had better footing with you, and trying to determine what they felt about each other.

You and Law were always orbiting each other, your gravities drawing you together. Rather than wait for you to find him, he’d openly seek you out and remain fixed at your side. Never one to show obvious affection, he always kept a respectable distance. But as the physical space between you shrank, and during moments where you were bold enough to touch him in front of people, he’d open himself and allow you to lean against him.

It’s not that you acted any differently towards Zoro. Still lighthearted and flirtatious, you’d give his arm the occasional squeeze and hold his waist as you walked past. You’d come to the gym bearing water and snacks, and rub his back while he napped under the shade. Your eyes still sparkled like jewels as you laughed together, tossing another empty bottle of booze into the ever-growing pile between you. If anything, you were spreading yourself evenly between the two of them. If you weren’t with Zoro you were with Law, and neither him or Zoro seemed very intent on questioning you about it. Taking the role as your dedicated knights, they were on standby, awaiting your beck and call.

One thing that spoke to the shift in energy was you fully abandoning your local island hookups during the several week journey. Although not necessarily a bad thing, it did make Zoro long for the days when you’d get done up to hit the town. How you switched up your everyday style of a cropped tank and baggy cargos - though he did love that too - in favor of more lace-up tops and tighter jeans. And what he missed most was you rescuing him when he ambled off during a pub crawl. Extracting yourself from the clutches of an overeager sleeze, you’d make a beeline to save him from a night of aimless wandering. Grasping his arm, you’d cackle away as you guided him back to the group, and he’d hold you close to keep you from crumpling under his weight. More often than not, you’d both return to the ship together, collapsing in a heap on the deck and passing out under the stars. Those nights were when he truly had you to himself, unwound and mochi sweet, soft enough to sink his teeth into. If only he’d gotten off his ass to do it.

Zoro now spent most of his days, when not blowing off steam in the gym, trying to figure out why you being intimate with Law was so troubling to him. He’d been fine when you indulged in the occasional romp because they were always so fleeting and temporary. He’d been comfortable with what he had with you because it was casual, it was easy, and he had you in a way that no one else ever could. He never felt any pressure to prematurely push things along because there was no one who could ever compete with him when it really came down to it.

Law however was...someone who could be worthy of you. And this truth gnawed at Zoro’s heart, as much as he hated to admit it. Despite Robin’s morbid pondering, he knew there was no way you’d actually leave the crew behind. But what he feared most was you abandoning your desire for him. He wanted to say that he’d let you go, but as more time passed he began to consider being more selfish.

No one would say anything to Zoro about it directly, but the weight of everyone’s curious stares was hard to ignore. Franky, who took on a role as an unimposing pseudo-older brother, would clap Zoro on the back and throw an occasional “you’re alright” in passing. Zoro always shook him off, but a fraction of the tightness in his chest would loosen.

Intent on clearing his mind, he headed to the kitchen for a nightly booze raid. Surprisingly, he found you there - having seen less and less of you during the later hours, thanks to Law’s special sleep meds. You stood with your elbows propped on the kitchen counter and a bowl of fried rice at your side. Distracted by your turbulent thoughts, you failed to acknowledge his entrance. As he strolled over to the liquor cabinet, his eyes flitted over to you nibbling on your thumbnail. The metal clank of him breaking the lock finally snapped you back to reality.

”Oh! Hey you!”

”Yo.”

After grabbing the last bottle of sake, his heavy footfalls rattled the foggy tension as he walked over to the bar. He took a seat and glanced down at your rice.

”You better finish that up before it gets cold, you know how that cook is.”

”I’m not you, I don’t have to worry about getting my ribs caved in by his boot.”

He snorted as he pulled off the cork of the bottle, not bothering to counter your argument.

”And anyway, I’m gonna wrap this up for breakfast tomorrow. I realized I’m not really hungry.”

”Clearly.”

Your eyes finally met his as you dropped the fork you’d been twirling.

”What’s with that tone?”

He hadn’t realized he’d had one.

”What’s with you spacing out so much tonight? I thought your doctor gave you those magic pills.”

You went back to nipping at your nails, avoiding his stare.

“Did you fuck him or something?”

The hand in your mouth dropped at the same moment your jaw unhinged.

”What the hell?”

”Come on. I know you well enough to see that something happened. Did you fuck him?”

”No I didn’t fuck him.”

His brow arched in disblief.

”We didn’t have sex...nakedly.”

”Hah? What the hell does that mean?”

You gave him a smirk, pushing your bowl of rice aside.

”Figure it out.”

Letting your cryptic confession marinate, he tried to envision what other activities you and the ever-uptight Law could’ve been up to. A part of him felt rubbed raw as he realized you and him still hadn’t even kissed, and yet you and Law had already been entangled with each other. Whether it was sex or something else, you’d been physically intimate. And in that moment you’d never felt more out of his reach.

“So are you two gonna be a thing now for the next, what, five days? Since that’s how much longer we have until we reach Zou.”

Your eyes softened as you reeled in your defenses. Like you remembered you were supposed to care about him too.

”We’re not ‘a thing’. But...would it bother you if we were?”

”Well I wouldn’t exactly be overjoyed considering he’s still an enemy.”

”That’s not what I mean. Would it bother you?”

He chewed on your words, trying to decide how much he was willing to reveal - to you and himself. Raising up from his seat, he walked around to the other side of the bar where you stood. You continued to face away from him, even as he came up behind you to wrap an arm around your waist.

”You’re not going anywhere,” he murmured into your hair.

”What are you talking about?”

”I mean you’re staying right here.”

You straightened your back, touching the hand encircling your waist.

”Zoro, I’m not leaving any of you. I’m not going anywhere.”

”That’s not what I mean.”

You turned around, face dissolving into somber understanding.

”Is that what you think is going to happen?”

”That’s what I think is happening.”

You placed your hands on his shoulders, slipping them around his neck when he stepped closer. As you took his face in your hands he wanted to kick himself, hating how much relief immediately spread throughout his body - how consumed he was by your touch. Your head fell forward onto his chest and he flexed his hand holding your waist.

”I thought you said you were cool with this and there was no pressure. You’ve never been this bothered by anyone else before.”

Resting his head atop yours, he let out an exasperated breath.

“None of the others mattered. He’s different.”

“Because he’s the enemy?”

“Because he’s him.”

You looked up and he struggled to keep himself from breaking contact with your prying eyes, picking apart the rawest parts of him.

“What, do you hate him or something?”

“No, I don’t. It’d be easier if I did though.”

“Then what is it about him that’s bothering you?”

His body felt strained. He hated feeling as if he was admitting to a shortcoming on his part.

Turning you back around, he wrapped you up in his arms to pull you close. You tipped your head back onto his shoulder and snuck a hand into his hair, making him shudder as you lightly scratched his scalp. He brought his lips to your cheek, brushing his nose along your skin. More purposeful kisses tickled your ears and neck as you melted against him.

He loved when you leaned on him, physically or otherwise. You’d told him how you were forced to remain strong for yourself after living such an unstable life, and being with him made you feel safe. He wanted to be your fortress, blocking out any forces that came to knock you down. And he wanted to be your anchor, keeping you from drifting away when you got too much in your head. His body and mind were strong - it would take nothing for him to carry everything of yours and his.

Your soft sighs soothed his ears as he glided his tongue along your neck. Digging his fingers into the tenderness of your sides, he inhaled the citrusy aroma of your skin, and you cocooned yourself into him. Moving a warm hand down below your abdomen, he toyed with the drawstring of your sweats.

“Zoro. What are you doing.” It wasn’t really a question, and there was no trace of apprehension in your voice.

“Reminding you of what’s here.”

He kept his hand still, waiting for you to respond. You trembled with want, finally guiding it between your legs. Zoro hadn’t even realized how hard he was until his fingers made contact with the wet fabric of your panties. As he ground against your backside, a low groan settled in his chest.

“You’re so wet already sweetheart.”

Your words were stolen as his fingers massaged your clit, your panties providing a delicious friction. As you released a small sob, he cupped your pussy and squeezed.

“I’m gonna take care of it, alright?”

Still fighting for words you nodded. He slid a hand into your underwear and stroked his middle finger between your swollen lips.

“We should’ve done this forever ago. Why did we wait so long?”

“I was waiting for you to make the first move,” you replied, voice airy and feather light. He smiled. He should’ve known you’d been relying on him. He’d spent enough time teaching you how, it was good that it finally become second nature to you.

“I guess I gotta make up for lost time then,” he murmured into the side of your neck, circling a blunt finger along your entrance.

“Zoro please,” you whined, digging your nails into his arm.

“Please what?”

“You haven’t even kissed me yet. Please kiss me.”

He hadn’t forgotten, he was just waiting to hear you ask for it. Removing his hand from your pants he grabbed your hips and spun you around, hungrily capturing your lips. Your hands gripped the fabric of his shirt, bringing him closer as you moaned. He was so hungry for you a growl ripped from his chest, and he leaned you against the counter. Cupping your head and tipping it back, he gave himself a better angle to lick into your mouth. Your hands moved without purpose, grasping at anything they could reach. When he yanked your sweats back down to shove his hand back into your underwear, you pushed against his chest.

“Zoro,” you panted “we can’t here. Sanji would lose his mind if he found out.”

“Good, that makes it the perfect spot.”

“But-“

He cut off your protests as he lifted you up, moving to wrap your thighs around him and slamming you against the adjoining wall.

“There, now we won’t soil the prep station.”

He claimed your lips once more before you could respond, nudging his hardness into your core. Any trepidation of yours disappeared as he rolled his hips and you tightened your legs around his waist.

“Let me put you down so I can stuff my fingers inside you.”

With little protest, you dropped your legs, spinning around to face the wall. Your sweatpants remained gapped open at your thighs, giving him the freedom to resume his teasing touch beneath your panties.

“You want me to pull these all the way down?”

“No, I kind of like them up. Feels like you’re digging into something forbidden.”

“Can’t be forbidden if it’s mine.”

You collapsed against the wall, scratching your nails along the smooth wood. Spreading your legs open, you gave him better access to finally dip two fingers inside you. Your walls begged to be breached, hugging his fingers tightly, and warm and slick with your arousal. He couldn’t stop his teeth from sinking into your neck as you thrust your ass against him, begging for him to go deeper.

“Is this why you’re so stuck between us? Because your pussy’s so greedy?”

“Stop saying I’m greedy, I just want you both,” you cried with a needy whine, still arching your back as he stretched you.

“Did he open you up this good?”

“We didn’t get that far...he made me cum too fast.”

“He’s that good? I guess I gotta one-up him then, don’t I?”

You refused to answer, losing any semblance of coherency as you stood on your toes in an attempt remain balanced. You gasped as he swiped his thumb along your clit, curling his fingers forward into the sensitiveness of your center. He considered freeing himself from the confines of his clothes, but decided this moment was meant just for you.

“Tell me how you want it.”

“Just...keep doing that.”

“How did he do it for you?”

“Why,” you whimpered, struggling to find your words, “why do you keep talking about him while you do this to me?”

“Because clearly you like it,” he smirked as more of your slick slid down his fingers to soak your underwear. “You like thinking of him while you’re with me, and I bet you like thinking of me while you’re with him.”

He added a third finger just as your mouth opened, and your reply died in your throat. Using the heel of his palm, he continued rubbing it against your clit as he curled and spread his fingers relentlessly.

“Am I wrong?”

“No,” you keened in a withering tone.

“You want me to go get him so he can watch? Maybe take you next?”

“Zoro...don’t worry about him right now. I just want you to stay here, please.”

Drawing his lips along your temple, he felt the fangs of his yearning sink deeper. He was becoming tethered to you with a steel thread, and not even the strongest sword could sever it.

“Ok. I’m all yours.”

“You are?”

“Always will be.”

You tried to turn back around but he pressed a hand between your shoulder blades, forcing you further against the wall. Your weak wails crescendoed with the slick sounds of his fingers still thrusting inside you. Removing the hand on your back, he covered your mouth with his open palm.

“If you’re really worried about that shitty cook finding out, you gotta be quiet sweetheart.”

You nodded, eyes dotted with embarrassed tears. Zoro craned his head around to get a look at your face, and the sight he was met with would remain tattooed in his mind forever. You were so weak, so needy for him to bring you to your undoing, and you offering the gift of allowing him to take control fanned the flames of a burning addiction within him.

Your orgasm shattered you moments later, so tangible and molten-hot through the convulsions of your body. Your cheek was still squished against the wooden slats of the kitchen wall, and you huffed shallow breaths when he removed the hand covering your mouth. Finally spinning you back around he re-captured your lips in a hazy kiss, pillowed by your shortened breaths.

“I’m sorry I waited so long,” he sighed, gazing into your half-lidded eyes.

“I can’t believe he’s got you so worried that you’re apologizing to me now.”

Ignoring your teasing he removed his hand from your panties and pulled your pants back up. You geared up to heckle him further but paused as he slipped a hand into his mouth, sweeping his tongue between his fingers.

“What was that?” He snickered as your voice faltered.

“Nothing,” you gawked, tracing his jawline with your fingers.

“You’re not trying to play us, are you?” He asked, poking your side.

“You know I’m not. There’s too much at risk. I can’t help that you both snuck up on me like this. And I can’t help that you’re both so desirable.”

He hummed, taking the hand of yours on his face to lay a kiss on your knuckles.

“Yeah Robin did say you have a type. Guess we’re just that hot, huh?”

“I mean, you both are very pretty.”

He chuckled, kissing up your wrist until you tried to pull your hand away.

“Zoro.”

“Hm?”

“I don’t know if I’m going to be the same when he leaves.”

“I know,” he muttered, grabbing your hand back to resume giving it kisses.

“So why are you still being so sweet?”

“I’m just naturally cute, remember?”

“Ugh, you’re insufferable,” you scoffed without any real malice. You pushed away from the wall, side-stepping him to put your bowl of rice away. As you turned back to face him, you presented him with a smirk.

“Don’t think this completely puts you over him. He still made me cum faster.”

He smiled, walking away from the bar.

“Yeah well, at least I managed to touch you underneath your clothes.”

Your eyebrows raised as you realized he’d finally figured out what you’d done.

“Sure, but I got to feel what’s underneath his so you definitely have some Big Competition.”

Swiping the bottle of sake from the counter, he walked over to join you at the door.

“No wonder that guy’s so strong, he’s had to lug that thing all over the Grand Line.”

“Zoro!”

He smiled with a toothy grin, kissing your head as he walked past you into the hallway.

“Go find your doctor and get some sleep.”

The pat on his backside stopped him in his tracks.

“Don’t worry, he knows just how to put me to sleep. Goodnight Zoro.”

You spared him a quick wink over your shoulder and walked away. If you really were heading over to meet up with him, he’d endure it. It was only five more days until they’d reach Zou, and then you’d thankfully part ways. He’d finally have you all to himself during the journey to Wano. And although he didn’t pray, he strongly hoped that for once, all of their plans would run smoothly once they reunited with everyone.

Unfortunately, that original course of action would be thwarted by unforeseen events, thanks to that shitty cook.

#myfic #roronoa zoro x reader #Trafalgar law x reader #zoro x reader #law x reader #roronoa zoro #Trafalgar law #one piece #attention series

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bronx-bomber87 · 2 months ago

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Happy Wednesday wonderful readers. It's hard to believe we’re on 6x08 already. Thanks for hanging in there with me. 6x05-6x07 are not easy episodes emotionally. So appreciate you all reading these. 6x08 is an emotional ride all its own. This entire season is really. We get a beautiful moment at the end for our ship though. One that still makes me weepy. With the perfect song to go with it. So let's begin shall see?

6x08 Punch Card.

The ep name is punch card when it starts out with a punch to the heart. We see a reminder come up on Tim's phone. It’s about Lucy’s birthday *sad sigh* Not only a reminder but he has 'Birthday' in all caps. Wanted to make sure he didn’t forget. Also and this is just shippy conjecture... Was he did so he could do something special for her. That’s what that reminder represents to me. He quickly swipes it away and tries to swipe the feelings along with it. His sigh and tongue click has me emotional. It’s all through this episode we start to see the regret really begin to sink in for Tim .

I know people were upset he didn't seem as upset as Lucy in 6x07. Trust me that man is WRECKED. He showed signs last ep. But this episode marks the beginning of him truly showcasing all of that. Tim is starting to feel the immense loss he’s inflicted on himself. *phew* I wanna cry. Which has been a theme since 6x05. He is broken out of his emotional revere by the elevator opening. It’s Mad Dog and Blair. The tension is palpable in there but you’re not sure why. Only that something feels very off and wrong about the whole thing.

Tim is so caught up in his Lucy loss he doesn’t pick up on it. Had that reminder not come up he would’ve been sharper. His cop gut screaming out a bit more. But as of right now it's subdued with sadness. Kills me how he wants to rectify things with M.D. Breaks my heart really. He hurt more than just Lucy with his actions. Mad Dog is short with him and not in a place to receive these amends. Tim breaks my heart a little more when he watches him depart. Oh Timothy. He finally acknowledges Dr. London asking if she's getting off here? When she says she took the wrong elevator my red flag was going OFF.

Now comes the scene I know made everyone uncomfortable. I don't love it I'll be honest. But here’s my take on it. Last episode we talked about defense mechanisms a lot. What Tim and Lucy’s were. Why they use them. To me this scene right here is displaying Dr. London’s. I believe she uses flirting as her defense mechanism. They showed her flirting with Aaron at the bar in the recap for a reason. Side tangent about the recap. This will be a small detour to my point lol. They also showed the breakup again in the recap too. Hate that. I'll have PTSD from that scene for life. Like damn recap I don't need the reminder. Don't worry we haven't forgotten I promise you. It's seared in my memory for life thank you very much....

Anyways I think that scene at the bar with Aaron in the recap was to set up this scene. Very intentional of her manipulative flirting. Tim asks about Mad Dog which sets that in motion. So in order not to blow her cover she flirts with Tim. Under the guise of ‘Checking in on him.’ Turning it back around on him by asking how he felt seeing him? She’s doing this to shield herself and deflect further questions about what just happened. Tim is clearly upset and she takes advantage of it. It’s a mixture of the Lucy reminder and now seeing Mad Dog. The manifestation of two relationships he destroyed with his actions in 6x05-6x06.

So even though I don’t love this scene. I get the why and mechanics behind it if that makes sense. I know some people thought him replying back was flirty. I think he was just doing his own investigating. His gut kicking on in this moment. He’s clearly not comfortable with her trying to do therapy outside their sessions. Also his face when he exits the elevator tells me everything. It’s not of a man who flirted. It's one who’s is still deeply hurting. Also conflicted because his cop gut IS going off and he doesn’t know why…. He is feeling as off as we were about her.

We hop over to our girl in Grey’s office. Asking her how her new roommate is working out? That being Celina of course from the previous ep. Reason he’s asking is he needs her to ride with her today. Lucy is so adorable saying she’s not a T.O. though… This is where the scene gets real cute. Grey all but anoints her LOL Lucy’s face when he does is hilarious. Couldn't fit in but was very Lion King vibes up in here haha

Lucy continuing the adorableness asks if he can do that? Wade replying he is all powerful lmao I think this scene is great for a couple reasons. First off thank you Wade Grey for giving her a position of power and authority like this. If anyone has earned it it’s our girl. I also think this is really good for her self esteem. For him to trust her enough to give her a leadership opportunity is huge. Shouldn’t have taken this damn long honestly. But she has been very UC driven since S3.

Regardless I love this so much for her. To prove her leadership skills. To rebuild herself a bit post breakup. Lastly I think this moment is a wee bit of foreshadowing. With the time elapse, I’m sure is to come with the s7 premiere, she could be one by then. This is straight speculation. Since we don't know a damn thing bout s7. But I think it would be real good for her. She would be a superior teacher to new rookies. Far better than numb nuts Nolan…. Grey is MVP two eps in a row I will say.

Tim enters the chat immediately after. He’s so lost in trying to delete his reminder he doesn’t realize Lucy is there. That Lucy smile of his ever present. He literally can’t help it. Man is so damn gone for her. It oozes out of him whenever she is present. Ugh. My heart. Lucy almost returns it because she has for so many years prior. She stops herself midway and reminds her body she’s still mad at him. Tim tries to break the ice a little with his joke. Lucy doesn’t engage as much as he would like of course.

Still picking up the pieces of her broken heart my love. Also the awkwardness that still exists between them is ever present in this short scene. Couldn’t get away fast enough and Grey notices this of course. His reply of 'Wow.' saying it all. The way Tim watches her until she is out of sight *heart clutch* Just watching his entire heart walk out the station….Ain’t no thing…Doesn’t affect me at all. *sniffle* *phew* I’m fine.

This hurts no matter the time that has passed. Hate seeing them like this. I know with s7 in the works we are on the road to recovery. But until said recovery happens, these post breakup eps are gonna hurt like a SOB. There's no two ways about it. Even after they get back together these will still sting. Cause Eric and Melissa did an incredible job with these episodes. This short scene wrecking us shows us their skills. Elevating the material in a way only they can.

Grey notes how awkward that was. Tim telling him it’s better than it has been.... That’s not enough for Wade though. Honestly it shouldn’t be. That he need again to fix this ASAP. This will only continue to breed dysfunction. Which in turn will be a disaster for team cohesion. That he isn't going out that way as Watch Commander. Wade reminding him he NEEDS to work it out with Lucy.

Otherwise it’s going to force him to choose between them. Now you know I love my Tim. Love this man to death. Would fight anyone who knocks on him. But I friggin adore Grey choosing Lucy in this scenario. Tim caused this mess he either needs to clean it up. Or it’s time for him to go. Hurts my heart to write that but it's true. Even though he is senior officer, worked there longer, been under Wade longer it doesn’t matter. He will be the one shipped off. Taking her side is the right thing to do.

Makes me wanna cry the thought of him being sent away. I remember first time watched this it started a deep ache in my gut. One of massive anxiety. Of course it would be friggin North Hollywood. That damn station been haunting them since s2. Just looming overhead ready to take one of them. Almost happened in 5x12 too. Anyways does my heart good he sides with Lucy in this matter. This is Tim’s mess to fix and no one else’s.

Lucy meets up with Celina and asks if she’s ok with this? Ever the amazing empath our girl. Celina looks psyched as hell to have Lucy. How could she not be? Wealth of knowledge to give her in a kind but commanding way. Getting to see Lucy show off her leadership skills is making me giddy. On a solo character level was my fav part of the ep. (Clearly not counting the Chenford stuff)

Her leadership style is right there with mine. Where I am 90 percent Tim her being a T.O. Is all me. Her style is pretty damn identical to mine. Telling her she wants to ‘Invest in her success.’ Is me all damn day. Thats all I ever wanted for my team. For them to see I was investing in them and there to make them better. It’s cute how excited Celina is for this. Hell of an upgrade from the bumbling bone head she usually has.

The Aaron and Tim show begins and I’m here for it. I’ve always enjoyed their dynamic. Aaron pushing Tim a little more than most would. We know Lucy has softened him to the point where he doesn’t kill Aaron. ha Asking why he has to be the one to be in uniform and not Tim? Lmao Because you are the rookie dearest haha These two are goobers together and I love it sfm. You can tell he is dying to ask Tim if he is struggling right now. Because he went from QB to water-boy for Metro.

Like I said earlier it’s really starting to hit Tim the relationships he fractured. The regret is coming at him from all sides in this one. First Lucy and now this. Aaron can’t help it and asks anyway even though he shouldn’t. Tim gives him the company line of course. Pulling some S1 Tim out in this van. Telling him he does what he’s told without complaint. Ok babe yes, but that doesn’t mean it’s not upsetting you….

He went from running this entire team. Making calls on the fly to this. Boring grunt work. Tim bounces back with his sassy comment about his deodorant. I’m cackling because Aaron’s reaction is so damn funny. He gets so distracted by this he doesn’t write anything down. Tim’s face when he asks why isn’t documenting this is so funny. The most Aaron thing he could do. Be derailed by Tim's comment and not pay attention. Oh I will miss you Aaron Thorsen.

I am enjoying Lucy’s teaching so much. Partly because it reflects how I teach. She corrects without crushing her confidence. She also does it afterwards as not to ding her confidence in the moment. Exact reflection of what I used to do for my work kids. Lucy is kind but confident in her correction. Doing it in the moment so it sticks, but waiting till after they’re done for her to properly receive it. Celina receives it well because even though it’s one she is told in a kind manner. I just love it sfm.

The other reason I love it is because Lucy is out here crushing it. Zero T.O. Training but picking it up like she’s been doing it for years. She is going off instinct and what she would’ve wanted as a rookie. I had zero training when I was told to train new hires as a manager. So I went based off my experience and what I would’ve loved to know when I was new. So her tactics are very similar to me and makes me happy to see it.

Already light years ahead of Nolan it’s insane. Tim would be so proud of her if he could see it. We all know how seriously he takes training new officers. The sacred duty that it is and needs to be treated as such. Lucy is doing all that and more. Feels like more foreshadowing for her to become one in s7. Would crack me up if she got one of the new ones and Tim got the other. They could compare and contrast their leaderships styles. See who does better. But I’m daydreaming with that ha

Tim’s phone goes off again. Reminding him once again Lucy’s birthday is tomorrow. Tim is hit with a double gut punch in this moment. First grunt work for Metro then Lucy loss as the second one. Aaron noting he must’ve set it quite a few times... Which is heart breaking to think of in this moment. It is sweet he set it up so many times so he wouldn’t forget it. I think pre-breakup Tim didn’t want to lose track of this important day.

Also my guess is he wanted to make a big deal of it too. Their days are unpredictable so makes sense he would set so many. That’s pure conjecture on my part. But watching him through out their relationship this lines up. Seeing how he doted on her and brought her thoughtful gifts. He was most definitely going to do that. Like I said earlier this ep is starting to reflect the cracks in his foundation.

His facade of pretending to be okay after their breakup is starting to fade. The fact that he says ‘Girl you broke up with.’ Not his ex is speaking volumes to me. It’s starting to dawn on him truly what he’s lost and done. Because you would say ex if it was something to move on from. The regret is starting to seep in and breaks my heart to watch it. But also it’s good to see him feeling it. Now that’s he’s regulated and going to therapy, his clarity on what he’s done is coming up for air. It’s weighing on him, and we can see that clearly in this scene.

This next part really gets me in the feels. Tim asks if he got her anything? Being vulnerable for the first time in their convo. Look at that puppy in the first couple gifs. Aaron tells him yes. A spa day at the Four Seasons. It’s the smile here that gets me. Even thinking about Lucy brings about that smile of his. The one that only comes up around her or about her. He knows exactly how much his girl is gonna love that. Enjoy it. Also thinking how much she deserves such a gift.

The smile has me reeling. He just loves her so much. He can’t help but do that in love smile when he thinks about her. *screams into a pillow* Then his smile ends with sadness. Eric be killing me for a 4th ep in a row. We watch the smile tail off with a tinge of sadness. Because he’s not going to see how happy that gift makes her. How she would’ve dragged him along with her most likely. It’s really hitting him he’s lost her. Lost access to that part of her life now.

The happiness to heartbreak in that smile is masterful on Eric’s part. Just look at him in that last gif. I was feeling all that from his smile. It’s subtle but impactful as hell. Eric and Melissa’s speciality at breaking our hearts. Especially this season. His reaction is screaming how much he still loves her. Carrying the burden of what he’s done is becoming more and more evident. Mourning the loss of what he hastily threw away. Hurts so good. Maybe they’ll be together by her next bday and he can make up for it. A girl can dream right?

The boys share a nice moment and I love it. Aaron pushes it with his final question though. You can see him drawing up the courage to ask Tim. Wanting to know what everyone wants to know. Why they split up? Tim’s reply cracking me up. He is as sharp and curt as can be. No more emotion left in his tone. ‘No’ LMAO Vulnerable Tim is gone now. Took it too far Aaron...

The balls on you sir to ask that my god. Lucy doesn’t even know why. You sure as hell aren’t going to get that answer…Honestly you’re lucky you got Tim as vulnerable as you did good sir. But gotta love him trying and failing super hard. Makes a bittersweet scene end on a funny note that made me chuckle.

This scene with Mad Dog hurts my heart. Tim is facing the repercussions of his actions so hard in this episode. From both barrels of Metro and Lucy. It’s good for him to feel and see what he’s done. That doesn’t mean it does hurt me to watch it. I’m still protective of him even though it’s what he needs to see and experience...

My worry was something like this happening. Working with Metro was going to reopen a wound that’s hasn't even begun to heal. We know what happens with M.D. later. So, a part of this is projection is because he knows he’s walking his guys into a trap somewhat. Worried Tim is going to find him out through his OP plan. That being said doesn’t make it easier to watch him dismantle Tim.

I will say it is yummy to see him in street clothes and jeans. That badge prominently on his hip. Mmmm gimme. Wouldn’t be me if I didn’t gawk at him a little would it? Also haven’t done it in a minute due to the non stop heartbreak since 6x05.

The OP goes sideways in the worst way. They’re ambushed and his guys end up in the hospital. Nash is in surgery due to the explosion. Tim comes to see Mad Dog and it feels all kinds of off. He’s expecting Tim to flog him for what he’s done. That his OP lead his men into danger. Almost as if he wants Tim to reprimand me for what he’s done. But he’s in the dark to what’s going on so Tim can’t possibly do as such.

Tim’s cop gut is kicking into high gear during this scene though. Between M.D. acting completely different post OP and his reaction to Blair appearing. Tim questioning how in the hell she even knew about this? She comes up with a pretty slick answer that pacifies Tim for now. But it’s seeing Mad Dogs reaction that has his red flag going up.

He can barely look at Blair in the eye. Tim noticing and bringing it up. M.D. plays it off as being tired. That he doesn’t want to talk about his feelings right now. Tells Tim they shot him full of painkillers. He’s gonna shut down for awhile. Tim understands and doesn’t linger. I remember knowing at this point she was dirty. But could also see the internal struggle going on inside her. Which intrigued me to why she was dirty in the first place? All things to come in later eps...

Now comes the best part of the entire episode. One that we all still think about. How could we not? Eric and Melissa were once again surprised how much we loved this scene. What’s not love? What's not lose our minds over? Return of Kojo, the song that is utter perfection, and the fact that Tim reached out through him to say Happy Birthday. Makes me teary just thinking about it. I'll never be over this scene. How it felt like a true start to healing our shipper hearts. Because they've been in ROUGH shape for awhile.

We all needed this moment. After such utter heartbreak and turmoil the last 3 episodes. This was like coming up for air for the first time to truly breathe. Melissa killing us right off the bat. Her face was all of us in this moment. The way she lights up when she sees Kojo. Their cute fur-baby just sitting in the hallway with a card in his mouth. I’m not crying you are... Also makes me giggle a little thinking how Tim had to run from the door after he knocked. To make sure only Kojo was there. It's the sweetest thing. *happy sigh*

Killing me softly with how she pets him. Asking how he is. Telling him she misses him. Just like Tim in the van her smile morphs. It goes from happiness to sadness. Because Kojo is an extension of Tim. Her saying she misses him is having a double meaning here. Despite all the hurt Tim caused her she misses him so much.

It’s reflected in how she is loving on Kojo. Her words have an extra meaning to them. Of course she misses her fur-baby. But she also misses her person. A piece of her heart is missing with him gone. This scene has me teary from beginning to end. We missed this good boy so much. Such a tearjerker of a moment when she reunites with him.

When Kojo takes off back to Tim it’s like watching a part of her heart go along with it. Knowing where he is running back to. The ache in her heart that is still there. She knows he’s in that hallway. It's bittersweet because even broken up she brings the best out in Tim. This wonderful gesture is due to how he’s grown because of her. If you weren't crying in this moment you're dead inside lol I'm sorry.

Tim wrecks me with how he’s looking toward that same hallway. He can only imagine what her reaction is. Hoping it's a good one. That what he's done here is having a positive effect on her. It is. What a way to bring this sweet boy back in. They really killed it with this scene. I love Tim keeping his distance. Respecting her space in this moment. But knowing he couldn’t let her b-day go without acknowledging it. This was the best way to do it.

Also the fact that this is happening in that hallway. One that represents so many seminal moments for them. I just wanna sob at the beautiful symbolism of this. You can see the regret building on Tim’s face once again. The distance he can feel between them. It's like he’s finally grasping what he’s done. The regrets he feels starting to truly mount in this moment.

Melissa’s reactions after Kojo leaves are absolutely killing me. The tears in her eyes as she picks up the card. Evoking so much emotion out of me just watching her. This is where the lyrics had me bawling. Because it so perfectly represents Lucy in this moment.

"When the sun won't shine and the words don't rhyme And there's mountains you can't move.

Something's on your mind And it's been some time since you felt like you were you.

When it all caves in, feeling paper thin And the pain might cut right through. "

This has been Lucy since the end of 6x06. Hell it was the fandom. The sun has not shined since that day for her. She hasn’t felt like herself in what feels like eons. Her pain feeling so very paper thin. The smallest thing cutting right though her. What happened between them rocked Lucy to her very core. She’s still sitting in the pain of it all. Him giving up on them so easily is haunting her. Probably wondering if he loved her as much as she loved him? Those intrusive thoughts running on an endless loop in her brain since it happened.

“When you feeling like you ain't got a friend, And you wondering' if you ever gonna' smile again. Every little things gonna be okay.” This one getting me in the feels as well. Another perfect reflection of how Lucy is feeling. I know what it’s like to feel this way. Alone in your pain. Wondering if you’re ever gonna smile again. Be happy. It seems so far off. These lyrics were so perfectly poignant. They were very intentional in using this song. As much as these lyrics made me cry they also filled me with hope and comfort. Particularly the line in that last lyric. That everything is going to be ok. If you haven’t downloaded this song. I highly it recommend it. 'Lift Up Your Head. by Esabalu'

What makes the rest of this moment so beautiful are the following gifs. Lucy opening that card and seeing what Tim has done for her. This is also the first time we’ve seen Lucy cry about them. And it hurts like hell to watch. Like I said she’s been sitting in this pain. Wondering if this relationship meant more to her than it did Tim. Then he does this. Acknowledges her birthday in the perfect way. It does a couple things. One it shows he wanted to make sure this day didn’t pass without him acknowledging it. That’s he’s thinking about her.

Two it shows Lucy he stills cares about her. The gift in itself shows the level of care. He’s reaching out to her without physically doing so. I mean the effort he put into this is immense. He was so creative and thoughtful. Having it come from Kojo and not himself. Executing the perfect delivery on-top of it as well. The way she touches the paw print has me bawling. Just mopping up my tears at this point. Knowing what this card meant. What it represented. Lucy no doubt has been torturing herself still about why it ended.

How he didn’t care for her the way she did for him. She really needed this. Because it shows it has nothing to do with Tim's feelings for her. You don’t put this kind of effort in if you don’t still love someone. Her reaction is the second gif screams that. Lucy still doesn’t understand why. But she can rest little easier knowing it wasn’t about his feelings for her. This shows her he still cares deeply for her. Man owes her a conversation still but this was a beautiful start towards that. Towards healing.

Tim’s face KILLS me. I think the writers intentionally wrote him to come off as if he wasn’t as affected. That this breakup wasn’t killing Tim. When it absolutely was. He needed time to regulate and some therapy to get here. Also it makes this scene hit a little harder doesn’t it? That man’s face above is one of absolute regret. It’s truly hitting him what he’s done to her. Eric once again murdering my feels. They both are.

You can see the myriad of emotions splayed across his beautiful face. It’s here he’s finally grasping what he’s thrown away. Knowing he should be there right now. Celebrating her birthday along side her. That bath bomb she mentions earlier in the scene should be been shared together. This hurts so good. I commend them for the buildup to this moment. We needed that episode previous to get to this point.

For Tim to finally feel the regrets raining down on him right now. That is the face of a man who knows he ruined everything. Fucked up a perfectly wonderful relationship. Destroyed his happiness and hers. Hurt his favorite person in the process of his spiral. It's killing him he can’t be there for her like he used to be. Shut that door when he tossed them away. As much as this moment hurts it's huge step towards reconciliation. Tim coming to the realization of how he’s hurt her and the regret he feels due to it.

Also only Eric and Melissa could have SO MUCH chemistry and not even been in the same room. These final two gifs say it all in that regard my god. You can feel the anguish and emotion between them. Just emanating from them and to each other. I love our ship. I love the actors we are blessed to have portray them. Look at our beautiful babies above. Their on screen chemistry leaves me in awe of them. They aren't even sharing the same space and are exuding chemistry. These final lyrics of this song left me with so much hope.

“All these troubles only gonna last for a while

Yeah, we're gonna be alright, oh, child, lift up your head (yeah, the light, yeah, the light's gonna find you)

And the light's gonna find you”

These troubles are only gonna last for awhile fandom. This season felt like an eternity of pain after 6x05 but we’re gonna be alright. S7 is gonna be that light I just know it. Gonna be worth all this pain and heartache. When we're on the other side of it gonna be so much better. We are so lucky are babies get to be front and center and get these growth SL's. Have depth like they do. I'll take that over blah puddle deep Balian any day. S6 hurt so much. But this too shall pass it'll pass like a kidney stone but it'll pass for us.

Our beautiful moment is interrupted by a text from Mad Dog. He’s asking Tim to come find him to talk. They’re on a roof and that immediately made me nervous. Mad Dog tells Tim one of their guys Nash is paralyzed… I mean this adds to M.D's guilt. To why he ends up killing himself later in this scene. Tim tries to comfort him and let him know it could be temporary. This is where his confession starts. Saying it wasn’t supposed to go down like it did. It never does when you dirty like that…Tim asks him if he compromised the OP?

Tim is in absolute shock as he asks this of his former brother in arms. This is a hard scene to watch. Tim is seeing a man he used to trust his life with be revealed as dirty. That he was compromised. What a gut punch for him. I know Tim struggles with his mistakes still. But the difference being is his were always with the best intentions. He may not see that yet but his honor was always intact with them. His good intentions still present. Tim asked who he told? We all know at this point even Tim does but he needs confirmation. M.D. replies he can’t tell him. She knows all his secrets….Ugh.

Then he kills himself. Last thing this poor man needed was to see this. I do think it’s an interesting parallel to Tim. Why you ask? This could’ve been Tim if had ZERO honor. Zero integrity and moral compass. Had no one there to help support him. What he sees with his mistakes as being un-honorable was never this. M.D. is a person without the fortitude Tim has. It’s why he was turned and can’t live with himself after. I hate it being Dr. London I really do. But if not for her sessions how he reacts after this could’ve been so much worse than it was. His face when he looks over the edge is a knife to my heart...

Thank you once again to you all for reading, liking, commenting (Keep em coming I love them.) and reblogging these reviews. They mean the world to me. I shall see you all in 6x09 :)

Side notes-Non Chenford

Blair being crooked SUCKS. No two ways about it. I fought the idea so hard when the season was happening. Not because I liked her but because of Tim and Aaron too of course. But at this point it was for Tim. He had been vulnerable with her. Started therapy because of her and I was really worried that would be tainted.

Nothing really other than that just Nolan and he doesn't matter lol

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tpher · 11 months ago

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scary girl analysis !

something something the most clearly gimmicky gen 4 character we know. as your resident pahkitew island apologist, i dont care. it actually took me a bit to warm up to her and i figured id talk abt why that is

so her main thing is being creepy and sadistic for the sake of jokes. its not serious.. mostly. she does prove to actually be down to hurt others (such as when she got a hold of a jackhammer). but what about an instance where she wanted to hurt someone for actual reasons? when was that?

that was when priya went up to her to compliment her on doing a good job on the previous challenge. priya says that shes surprised by scary girl having done a good job.

scary girls response?

a very defensive "oh, it surprised you that i was good? cuz you thought id do bad?"

and thats the thesis of this post

scary girl is very insecure

backing up for a moment, in ep 2 when the teams were on ships and attacking each other, she was the one who came up with the idea of sinking the other teams ship as an idea on what to do when they were out of ammo (? iirc). but no one else heard that, just zee

then in ep 3, ripper makes her go last in the relay race thing bc he didnt want her to "blow things" for the team. she reacts by trying to bite his finger. not with a funny creepy smile, but with genuine anger to her literal bite. and then during that challenge, she infamously grabs a bear by the arm and starts beating it up while saying "thats what you get for growling at me!!!". once shes done, she goes "byeee" and goes on like nothing happened. proving that if someone wrongs her, she can easily let it go.. so long as she gets to do something back. remember this for later

and here we come back to her interaction with priya. so far, scary girl has proven herself to be a pretty alright player and she herself knows that. so the notion of someone being SURPRISED she did well?? does not sit well with her at all. but the way that she harps on the wording, even before zee steps in to make it worse, is what gets to me. it just really adds an extra layer to her character that, well. ironically surprised me! for someone who always seems to be in her own world, so unconventional, so ill-fitting with everyone else to also be insecure in some capacity?

anyway she tries to hurt priya with a spoon but gets interrupted. later on, priya is still thinking abt their encounter and feels bad so she tries to make it up to scary girl by flattering her. namely by saying that scary girls question was smart.. and priya being her awkward self, only dug herself in a hole by making it seem like that was a smart question by scary girls standards

scary girl is speechless. baffled. mad beyond words

it should be noted that scary girl looked offended when priya even started speaking. meaning that she also did not forget about their conversation that morning. she REALLY took it to heart. applying the bear logic here, had scary girl hurt her with the spoon earlier, would she be less mad? would she had considered each other even? and in that case, would this comment go over better or would it had simply restarted her need for revenge?

well. they dont interact for the rest of the episode up until the very end. after ripper used priya as a human shield, obviously injuring her

scary girl tells her that rippers a jerk and that priya didnt deserve that. so she'll be voting to get ripper out. and calls priya her "friend".

(her face and tone makes me a bit suspicious if this was genuine. but thats probably just her being her offputting self so i'll ignore it.) ok so by scary girl logic, priya deserved to have SOMETHING bad coming her way after what she said to her.

but not this.

scary girl, who came here to "make friends and watch them get really hurt", was not okay with what ripper did to priya. perhaps she thinks that only she could be allowed to hurt priya to balance things out? personally giving priya her karma, perhaps?

but now she considers priya a "friend". who likely wants to see her get hurt. but in the fun way that scary girl likely sees most other contestants as, possibly? idk.

anyway after all of that, we can see just how insecure scary girl can get over unintentionally awkward phrasing. just how deeply it hurts her feelings to be underestimated like that

season 2 spoilers ahead !!!

in season 2, we see even less of her. but there is SO much to work with

normal girl is so fascinating to me

by the time s2 starts, scary girl already has an all new look. shes trying to be "normal"

she admits in her confessional that some ppl thought she was too scary in the first season so thats why she changed her appearance and her everything. who were these ppl?

other than a dog as a joke, online forums, showing an interesting glimpse into the in-universe ""real world"" stepping into total drama. perhaps also a meta joke on the fandoms response to her but who knows. imagine unabashedly being yourself on tv and everyone is telling you to change. you are 16 and likely going through a weird phase. feeling a lot of heightened emotions already and ""knowing"" that this is who you are (at the moment). and if its not a phase? still 16 on international television getting lambasted by millions

and last but not least, her MOM??? her own mother. that just raises more questions abt how scary girl was before getting on td. was she NOT like this before? was she playing it up for the cameras? or did she just go unhinged without parental supervision? in any case the fact is that even her own mom wasnt okay with what makes her happy and how she presented herself.

so scary girls solution? to try her best to suppress anything that made her unique. to try to adhere to "societal norms", in her own words.

we dont see much of her in this ep other than her commenting on how shes normal and totally did not want to see someone get hurt. shes clearly struggling so bad. she knows that apparently what she likes isnt "right", therefore the opposite must be true, right?

she is simultaneously so immediately different that the others didnt even recognize her at first. yet still so "scary" that she cant fit in. she just doesnt know how no matter how hard she tries. if she were to stay longer, what can she do? this game is not only abt your skills in the challenges its also a social thing. how long until she snapped and went back to her old ways?

and then we get to the campfire ceremony. chef is about to call out whatever it was the she did wrong that day, but she interrupts him with a simple "no."

she cannot fathom being sent home, at least not this early. bc shes normal! she is sooo normal and she tried SO HARD to be normal! she read normal books and normal movies and studied normal people. she even taught herself to smile in a more acceptable way, which is so autistic coded to me. so she deserves to stay longer.

(getting flashbacks to my topher psychoanalysis and his entitlement being both a tragedy and his self-imposed downfall)

..but she studied "normal people" in her own not-normal way. while they werent looking. while they were sleeping. while they had no idea she was there.

so she got booted out for that. and she cannot believe it.

when she says that she "didnt even try to hurt anyone this time", she is mad. that was her ""fun"" and she managed to control it 100% only to get eliminated??? shes fed up!

but when she talks about how she taught herself how to smile in a "less-creepy" way?

she softens up and looks genuinely hurt.

she tried so hard. she saw all those horrible comments from people judging her based on like 5 episodes on a reality show. her own mother didnt accept her. her insecurity won and she aimed to change and repress everything that made her unique

and it still wasnt enough

#txt #td scary girl #td spoilers #i think parts of this sound like im seriously condoning her hurting others bc its [her] fun #and i am! scarysweep

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bridenore · 1 year ago

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HD longer fics recs : 125k to 150k words

Here are a few recs for fics ranging between 125k and 150k words.

You can see my recs for fics that have more than 200k here and between 150k and 200k here.

All Our Secrets Laid Bare by @firethesound [149k]

Over the six years Draco Malfoy has been an Auror, four of his partners have turned up dead. Harry Potter is assigned as his newest partner to investigate just what is going on.

Any Instrument by @dictacontrion [131k]

Draco Malfoy wouldn’t go back to England for anything less than an exceptional case. Being asked to figure out why Harry Potter can’t control his magic might be exceptional enough to qualify.

By the Grace by @letteredlettered [139k]

Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

Dwelling on Dreams by @the-sinking-ship [135k]

Draco thought he could avoid Potter for the duration of his brief return to England. He’d stick to his schedule and be back home in Paris, where he belonged, in a few short months. No trouble at all. He had plenty to occupy him, what with the opening of the London branch of his successful apothecary, his innovative research, drinks with Pansy, a backlog of unread potions periodicals.

Except Head Auror Potter is everywhere — in Draco’s chair, at his door, in his dreams. All six feet of motorbike-riding, combat-boot-wearing, sex-hair-sporting Saviour of the World packed into one unfairly fetching uniform. Potter won’t leave Draco the bloody hell alone, won’t let him breathe, let him forget, let him sleep.

Because no matter how fast Draco Malfoy runs, Harry Potter is always hot on his heels.

Eight Days A Week by @romaine2424 [121k]

This is foremost a love story and second it’s about those growing up years. Becoming adults with adult lives and adult decisions.

Yes, Harry’s a Trainee-Auror and Draco’s a Healer-in-Training after the war. Yes, Harry eventually moves into 12 Grimmauld Place. And, yes, attraction happens between Harry and Draco and they fall in love, but then there’s more. Draco is now free from Voldemort, free from fear of going to Azkaban, free from his Father’s beliefs, and free to be the person, the witch, the woman she always felt she should be. And for Harry, it’s time to lose the shackles of his childhood and discover who he really is and what’s truly important in life. This story begins one year or so after the Battle at Hogwarts and follows their relationship faithfully for two years. The final chapter will take place later in their lives.

This is a positive transition story without body dysphoria, but will contain moments where prejudice and slights arise. This story is categorized as M/F.

25 Holiday Scenes for Eight Days a Week by @romaine2424 [16k]

Eight Days a Week continues with 25 Holiday Scenes. As of now, they are all family oriented. If that changes, I’ll update the ratings! We begin where we left off in the Main Story (before the epilogue), which is a few weeks after Libby’s surgery. They were married in the summer, and Prim, their daughter was born in September.

Every New Beginning by @fencer-x [140k]

“You curl your lip and wrinkle your nose and sneer and call me Saviour, yet you only seek my help at the eleventh hour. That’s what’s fucked up, Malfoy.” || Draco Malfoy is dead, and Harry is absolutely totally fine with that.

Graceless Heart by shushu_yaoi_lj [132k]

Harry is lost and broken after the war. He has gone to countless funerals, broken up with Ginny, moved back into Grimmauld Place—which feels darker and dirtier than ever before despite how much he tries to fix it. He feels lonely and desperate, but he won’t ask for help, and he still can’t cry.

When he agreed to help the Aurors at Malfoy Manor over the summer, he thought that he would be breaking dark curses. Harry never thought that he would actually spend his days sorting out dusty books with Draco Malfoy, or teaching him how to cook.

Little by little, as they begin to navigate their life post-war, Harry and Draco become intimate…in more ways than Harry could have ever expected.

A Sword Laid Aside by @korlaena [128k]

When Draco’s cover is blown during a deep undercover operation and the Ministry is compromised, Ron takes Draco to the only safe place he can think of—Harry. Hiding out with Harry Potter, who has been missing from the Wizarding World for almost two decades after a shocking fall from grace, is nothing like Draco thought it would be.

Taking Chances by @gracerene09 [135k]

After the war, Draco disappeared and started over in America, vowing never to return to Great Britain and the fraught past he left behind. Unfortunately, when his mates convince him to sign up for an exchange programme for the last year of their Auror Training, Draco learns that he doesn’t have much of a choice in the matter.

That Which Divides Us by oldenuf2nb / @dianacopland [126k]

Three years after what would have been their seventh year at Hogwarts, the war between the forces of light and Voldemort’s minions grinds on. But even within the ranks of the Order of the Phoenix there are vast disagreements over what is good for ‘the Chosen One’ and his volatile relationship with Draco Malfoy has many on edge. Sometimes even the best intentions can reap disaster.

This Ain’t the Garden of Eden by @romaine2424 [131k]

In 2020, Hit Wizard Harry is starting to enjoy his life. He’s divorced, and no longer Head Auror. His biggest project these days is trying to remodel 12 Grimmauld Place for him and the kids.

Draco Malfoy is recovering from his wife’s death. But is happy with his Ministry position as Temporary Head of the Department of Intoxicating Substances, and with his son who he adores.

This all changes quickly when Minister Shacklebolt decides not to run for another term. The assumption is that ‘all is well’ in the British Magical world, and that Hermione Granger-Weasley will easily be voted in as the next Minister for Magic. However, Draco knows better. He knows she has a strong competitor who is wooing those who live in Knockturn. And if he wins, the Ministry, and all that has been accomplished the previous twenty odd years, will be destroyed.

To have a Home by Aulophobia [126k]

Not quite a decade after the war, Draco Malfoy was happy with his quiet little Muggle life in Oxford. He had a small group of friends from the university he’d attended, and colleagues from the law firm where he worked as a solicitor. He played folk music on his violin around the city. And he volunteered to provide legal services getting mostly idiot teenagers out of trouble with the law. His life was full. He had no contact with the magical world, and all was the way he liked it. And the feeling of emptiness in his chest, the feeling some part of him was missing, was at least better than the alternative. Or at least it was until the last few months when he kept getting called down to the police station to get Harry Potter out of trouble. Indecent exposure and possession was one thing, but the latest charge was for murder. OR Harry and Draco find each other again after the war in Oxford, a completely non-magical city. Together they solve the mystery of the city which hates all wizards but them.

What We Pretend We Can’t See by gyzym [131k]

Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.

where all the veins meet by eight_of_wands [146k]

It's the summer of 1998. The battle is over, and Voldemort is dead, but Harry still has more questions than answers. Who is he without a piece of Voldemort's soul in his head? What is he supposed to do now?

His friends try to help, but the only thing that can hold his attention—one of the only things that ever has—is Draco Malfoy, out on parole and weirdly hanging around the British Museum.

As they keep running into each other, Harry sees that Malfoy is different, and he wonders if he can be someone else, too.

Featuring rumpled band shirts, poker games everyone hates, fumbling sex, and a Harry going a little mental over how wands even work.

I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I did!

#drarry #drarry recs #my recs

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babyindeath · 3 months ago

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I just rewatched DP&W for the first time and I'm so bummed out about the last scene where Logan takes the dog from Wade and tells him "talk to the girl" kinda kills the whole build up of their (Logan and Wade's) progressing relationship :((( it was all cute when I first saw it but after all this time it kinda ruins the gay vibe from the rest of the movie

I totally get it, anon. The first two times I saw this movie I thought that neither of these romantic storylines worked narratively. Like at all. I’m still confused by the writing of it. I was really furious about it for a long time.

After my, say, third time watching it, I realised Vanessa did not necessarily “take” Wade back. First, we have the obvious fact she’s still seeing that aforementioned German guy from work (it’s only been two days), and second she does not respond to Wade’s confession - “I did it for you, even if you don’t want me” - verbally. Just held his hand seemingly platonically. Because why would they break up and get back together? They’re really going to fucking write this arc again? Seriously? So, after thinking about it, I decided to have at least a bit of faith in Ryan Reynolds et al.. They’re friends

Logan knows Wade still loves Vanessa. Even if Logan is starting to maybe fall in love with Wade, he knows that Vanessa is the love of Wade’s life and all he wanted to do for the entire mission was save Vanessa and his universe. It makes sense why he’d encourage him to talk to her. We know he truly cares about him thanks to the Time Ripper/Subway scene. (Genuinely can’t believe they didn’t kiss, instead he playfully hit Wade. ‘kay.). As a bi+ person myself I understand that he’s still not quite over Vanessa 6 years into their break-up while simultaneously crushing on Logan. Especially as she is still part of his found family.

When I first watched that scene, I was flabbergasted just like you. ‘What? What do you mean? But they. What? I.’ It’s another clip that the Deadpool-Wolverine fandom seems to either skim over or just pretend didn’t happen to protect the ship. But let’s be honest. These writers have heterosexual brains. Or so it seems. Debatable about Ryan’s brain. I don’t know how heterosexual brains work but from some of the choices in the movie re: Poolverine, I’m guessing not the best.

As for it taking away the gay vibes, Wade is still pansexual. He talks graphically about how he’d like to get fucked by male ‘dancers’. He says he doesn’t have a lot of vaginal sex. He has a sex dream about Thor. And another one. He’s very obviously aroused by Logan. He’s always talking about ass play. But I hate the fact his queerness is only discussed in jokes either among his character or for the audience and his love for Vanessa is always treated very seriously. Even 8 years after the first instalment. I hate it. And I can’t think about it or I’ll want to die.

Wade and Logan’s relationship changed completely in two days. They wanted to kill eachother. They had wrestle sex for 12 hours. They saved the world. Logan moved in with Wade. Wade introduced him to Al like a boyfriend. Again, I don’t know what heterosexuals think when they watch this movie, and I wish I did. So I still don’t know if the queerness in this film is intentional. My soul tells me it is. Everything I know about Ryan tells me this too. But when I think about Disney, Marvel, Ryan’s thinly-veiled desperation to be liked by the general public, the fact he’s for some reason become a business mogul, and that queer people will always be viewed as an accessory to our forever heteronormative society, my heart does sink. A bit heavy for a blockbuster discussion but representation is ALWAYS a big fucking deal. And I totally understand you.

I don’t even know what the hell my point is to be honest. Hope you can take something from all that though. Thank you for the message, I don’t get a lot of interaction on here so it means a lot! I don’t know if I helped. I haven’t written anything in an essay format in so long

#asks #deadpool and wolverine #poolverine

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hotshotsxyz · 2 years ago

Text

nothing's the same except everything

(buddie) (1.1k words) (6x15 coda) this started as a 6x15 coda and ended as spec for the rest of the season so ?? pls enjoy whatever it is i just did

On average, adults spend two hours per night dreaming.

Ever since his coma, Buck’s wondered if that statistic is skewed. Were coma dreams counted? If they weren’t, should they have been? And even if the statistic is right, does it take into account the way he is now?

Because he’s different. Buck knows he’s different. Eddie knows too, apparently, but it’s not just the him that interacts with the world every day that’s changed, it’s the him that lives in his dreams, too.

His dreams, jagged and sharp where they used to be soft and hazy. Buck’s different, and god, he needs to understand why.

Natalia helps, in a strange, roundabout sort of way. Not because she understands him, no, though he’s embarrassed to admit it took him four entire dates to figure that one out.

(And honestly, in what world was someone he just met going to get him like that?)

Anyway, it’s not what she sees in him that helps, not really, it’s what she asks when, at the end of their fourth ‘date’, Buck tells her he doesn’t want to see her again.

“What is it you’re still trying to figure out?” She tilts her head to the side in that enigmatic way of hers, and though she doesn’t explain herself further, Buck knows what she means.

You’ve seen what happens at the end, what else is there to know?

“What happens now,” he replies.

No weight falls from his shoulders when he ends things with Natalia, not like it did with Taylor. He thinks maybe it’s because, for once in his life, he let things run their course. Chose not to cling to a sinking ship.

It doesn’t really solve anything, anyway.

He says as much to Eddie one night, clutching the neck of a bottle tight between his fingers.

“So what now?” Eddie asks, leaving him all the room in the world to deflect. He finds he doesn’t really want to.

“I think,” Buck says, frowning, picking at the condensation-covered yellow label of his beer, “I think I’m going to start therapy again.”

A line of tension seems to release from Eddie’s shoulders and he nods. “That’s good, Buck,” he says, “I’m glad.”

There’s something else he wants to say, needs to maybe, but the words don’t come. It’s a feeling, and for the moment it’s vague. He’s got time, though. Enough time to find the words.

Buck wakes with a start. It’s hard to say, these days, whether he’s had a dream or a nightmare. The scenes are always disjointed, riddled with faces he doesn’t recognize wearing expressions he wishes he could forget.

Have you figured it out yet? They ask him.

How much longer do you think it can wait?

“You know,” Eddie says as they survey the remains of a burnt out house, waiting for the okay to begin overhaul, “it’s okay if you don’t have all the answers.”

Buck turns to him, cocks his head to the side in a silent question.

Eddie shakes his head. “I just mean– you can ask. Whatever questions you’ve been sitting on. Maybe Bobby’ll know, or Hen. Or– maybe I will.”

Buck swallows harshly. “I’m not sure I even know where to start,” he says.

“That’s okay too,” Eddie replies.

That night, he dreams of water. He claws at it, desperate to pull his way to the surface. The scene fractures, and he’s dangling from the top of the ladder truck. It groans loudly and begins to tip, slow at first, then fast, until the ground is hurtling towards him and–

Buck!

He wakes with a gasp and reaches for his phone with trembling fingers.

He dials and waits. Waits until–

“Buck?” Eddie’s voice is sleep-rough and worried, but Buck can’t bring himself to be sorry for calling.

“What happened?” he asks, so quiet he can’t be sure Eddie hears him.

For a moment, only the sound of breathing reaches his ear.

Then, Eddie tells him.

It’s strange, in hindsight, that Buck never thought to ask whose hands he came back to life beneath. Stranger still, the way his heart seems to react to the news.

Every time he sees Eddie, it gives a little jump, a small acknowledgement of the man that saved it.

Nothing’s the same but everything is, and the only constant in the universe is change but statistically, things always regress to the mean.

On average, adults dream two hours per night, and now, Buck only ever seems to dream of Eddie.

“What do you think dreams mean?” Buck asks Hen one morning, apropos of nothing.

“Why?” she asks, “Have a weird one last night?”

Buck shrugs. “Something like that.”

Hen pauses for a moment, takes a moment to look at him, really look. “I’m not sure they mean anything,” she says finally. “But how you feel in the morning… that’s got to be worth something.”

“Do you think I’m looking for the right things?” Buck asks Maddie.

“How do you know when you’ve found what you’re looking for?” He asks Chim.

“Are we clear to head out?” he asks Bobby.

The roads are always bad after an earthquake, but Buck navigates them carefully, driving slowly around old potholes and new cracks in the asphalt. None of the traffic lights are working, so Buck takes a circuitous route to the loft, making only right turns where he’d usually go left. What’s usually a twenty minute drive takes over an hour tonight, but they make it without incident, and that’s all Buck really cares about.

“I’ve got him,” he whispers to Eddie, nodding towards Christopher, who’s half-asleep in the back of the Jeep.

Eddie smiles tiredly at him and shoulders his bag.

As they wait for the elevator, another question occurs to Buck. “How did you know?”

Know what? Eddie should probably ask. Because Buck hasn’t really asked a question. He could be asking about anything. Could be asking–

How did you know I needed the jaws earlier?

How did you know what I wanted for dinner last night?

How did you know you could trust me with Chris?

How did you know I wasn’t the same?

How did you know I needed permission to ask?

Could be asking any of it. But he’s actually asking all of it.

Eddie smiles at him, tired but warm, wearing that soft expression he only ever seems to direct at him or Christopher. “Because I know you,” he says simply.

Buck’s eyes snap to Eddie’s, because suddenly, he gets it. I know you, Eddie says, and he’s right. Eddie knows him, and he knows Eddie.

All those weeks ago, he’d wondered aloud: what happens now? And this– this is the answer. Him. Eddie.

“Oh,” he says softly, a little awestruck.

Impossibly, Eddie’s expression softens further.

For once in his life, Buck knows exactly what happens next.

The ground shakes beneath their feet. Eddie’s eyes widen and he reaches for Buck, even as the shifting concrete has him stumbling back. The building around them groans and screeches, and Buck pulls Christopher tight against his chest.

Fear twists its way into Eddie’s expression. It’s the last thing Buck sees before the world crumbles around them.

#911 spoilers #911 #911fic #911 fic #buddie #buddie fic #uhhhhhhh idk what happened here but sorry!!#abbie writes #fic #userceecee

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sanjisblackasswife · 2 years ago

Note

I’m currently in my first watch through of one piece and got to /that part/ in marineford with Ace 😢💔 I’m heartbroken! Could I request some Ace fluff please? Maybe Ace finding out his crush actually likes him back? He talks about not deserving love/to even be born but that man deserves the world! I love him so much 😫

A/N: I remember almost a year ago my best friend told me she was finally starting her One Piece journey and after I think the first month or so I asked her who was her favorite so far and she said Ace and I immediately laughed….good times. ANYWAYS THO—Enjoy!

Ace Finding Out You Like Him Back(FLUFF)

Black Fem Reader in Mind

WC: 1.2k

CW: Very Fluff, Confessing, Kissing, Not proofread yet

He has had a crush on you since the day y’all met , but he didn’t realize how much he liked you until Marco pointed it out

“I DO NOT?!”

“Then why do you blush so much when you talk about her?”

He wanted to be in denial about it so much solely because he knew you couldn’t like him back. He never had much luck with ladies in his life.

Sure they flirted with him, and he had his small fair share of one night stands, but he never felt satisfied. He was curious at one point what it would be like to be with a partner that would love him for him, but alas he just pushed those feelings aside until he met you

You were so funny, and charming, and sweet to those around you. You even were like a mother/big sister to those you barely met when you both were out adventuring together.

You two became as thick as thieves, where ever you were he was and vice versa.

Ace developed feelings for you a few months after getting to know you, but it wasn’t until it got outted by his big brother that now he’s very awkward around you.

Ace became difficult to act normal around you and as much as he hated it he wanted to prevent you from finding out his feelings towards you

It’s been 2 weeks he has been trying to keep distance and you immediately noticed. You both now eat at different times. Ace is gone when you’re awake and there on w the ship while you sleep. It sucked because you assumed you probably made him mad somehow

Marco (and everybody on the MD) notices your slump mood and asks what’s wrong. You of course only confide to your big brother and Marco slaps the hell out of Ace for it because wtf is his problem ignoring you for almost a whole month for no reason

“GO TALK TO HER, MAN? She is miserable without you!”

Hearing the bad news about how his actions effected you made his heart sink. He would never EVER try to purposely hurt you, he didn’t really know how to properly express himself and just tell you the truth so here is now, in front of your room door pacing back and fourth fiddling his fingers.

“I like you, Y/n’— no that’s too direct—‘We should go out sometime’—-too desperate….—‘You’re so beautiful let’s date.’…..maybe—-“

His thoughts were thrown out when you opened the door, you must have been napping because you looked drowsy, you were wearing some shorts and one of his old shirts hanging off your shoulder.

“Oh…hey Ace…” you yawned wiping your eyes, you always looked so cute and cuddly to him when you first wake up.

He missed you so much and didn’t even realize it until he seen you again.

“Come in…it’s cold…” You moved back to let him enter, he took off his hat and inched his way inside as you closed the door, biting his lip contemplating what he should say next,

“What um—-“

“I’m sorry!” Was all Ace could muster up as he bowed in front of you, “ I’m so sorry I’ve been avoiding you! I didn’t realize how badly I was treating you until Marco told me. I’m…Y/N I’m so sorry…”

You were startled at the sudden apology from him, it’s not like you were mad at him, but you’d be lying to say it didn’t hurt you a little you both weren’t hanging out as much anymore. You seen his troubled face still bowing and you walk over to him to grab and hug around his neck, you missed his smell and warmth so much.

“Y/n—“

“I missed you, dummy…”

Ace’s eyes grew wide, hearing those sincere words come from you made him blush, and his heart pound. “Now,” He thought, “Tell her now…”

“You’re okay though right? You didn’t avoid me because I made you mad?”

“No!” He immediately shook his head looking down at you, fisting your his shirt tightly. “No you could never make me mad Y/N! You—you um…fuck…”

Ace was defeated he pulled away scratching his head to sit on the edge of your bed, you were confused. What’s up with him? You sat beside him, he looked as deflated as he was when you first met him,

You and Marco seen him sitting on the MB crouched down with his face in his knees after being thrown by WB all day once again.

“Y/N…I been avoiding you because…I…”

Ace grown frustrated with himself, you pretty eyes not leaving his when you speak, the amount of worry in your face, you were so beautiful in his eyes, it crushed his pride knowing he couldn’t speak to you so carefree anymore, because he knew if you rejected him. There would be no way he could rekindle your friendship with him.

“Ace..” you pulled his cheeks to look back at you, your thumb rubbed over his small freckles on his face, leaning into your touch like a cat you smile warmly at him. “Talk to me….what’s been going on?”

He sighs, grabbing your wrist to lower them he mutters, “Hypothetically speaking… Have you ever liked someone Y/N?”

“Oh…um…yeah I have.”

“Do you like someone now?….hypothetically…”

“Well hypothetically …Yeah. I do.”

Ace heart sank. Of course you do. You noticed his face frowning and you giggle to Ace’s dismay he’s a bit annoyed by it.

“What’s funny?”

“You, dummy.”

“How?”

“Because…hypothetically speaking ….what if I told you I liked…a guy…and he was very sweet…strong…funny…Lowkey a hot head….can’t express his feelings for crap…oh…and he’s my best friend.”

“You like your best friend?! Who is that?!”

Your lit up eyes lowered to dumbfounded, you tilt your head and scoff playfully.

“Ace be so forreal right now…”

“I AM WH—OH!”

“OH!” You mocked and laugh. “You dummy. Or are we not best friends?!”

“NO NO WE ARE WE ARE —I—I um…I didn’t know you felt that way….why?”

“What you mean why? You’re Ace! I adore you! You get me! You’re …you’re like…I don’t know…I just…really like you… probably even more than that…”

Ace couldn’t even begin to believe what he was hearing, maybe you were playing a prank because he hurt your feelings, “No seriously, Y/n..”

“I am serious! Ace I know…I know…about…not feeling worthy of love…but…if anybody else besides your brothers don’t show you it…I will…because I do love you….Ace…”

You could see his eyes gloss with tears, cheeks red as his necklace, as much as you could tease him instead you pull him by his neck to peck his lips lightly,

“I do love you, Ace.” You repeat on his lips to make sure he knows. The last thing you would ever do it play with his emotions like that.

Ace let out an airy chuckle before kissing you again, this time more firmly, holding you close as if your were ganna disappear in thin air.

“I…I love you, too….I’m sorry I—“

“Mmmhm NO more apologies just kiss me your lips are very soft and warm.”

Ace laughed at your kisses, pulling you on top of him not wanting to let go. His heart felt so warm feeling you, this was probably the first time in a long time he had a genuine smile across his face.

“Thank you for loving me, y/n..”

“Thank you allowing me to love you.”

#one piece #TimikosAce #one piece headcanons #black reader #one piece x female reader #one piece x black!reader #one piece x reader #ace x reader #ace x female reader #ace x y/n #ace fluff #ace scenario #ace imagine #ace one piece #one piece ace

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nero-vanderwolf · 5 months ago

Note

this inbox fic was originally meant for akechi's birthday. happy late birthday you fool

Goro Akechi remembers dying.

He remembers being shot by his cognitive self, he remembers bleeding out in Shido’s ship, he remembers that inky darkness that swallowed him up.

He remembers being so, so cold.

So why is he suddenly warm? Why can he hear a heartbeat that isn’t his own? Why does he feel so safe?

“Is he okay?” A voice asks.

Whoever is with him responds, their voice rumbling in their chest. They sound sleepy. “Yeah. He should be. ‘Doc said to give him a few more days, though. To be safe, or some shit like that.”

Someone else laughs, short and brief. Goro swears he’s heard it somewhere before.

“Yeah, because everything we do is so safe,” they say. There’s a smacking sound, and they curse.

“You didn’t have to be so harsh, Makoto...” They mutter.

Makoto... Nijima?

“Ah... Sorry, Akira. I didn’t mean to hit you that hard.”

Kurusu. Nijima. Is anyone else there? Where even is he?

The bed beneath him is oddly soft, so he certainly can’t in the hospital in Tokyo- but that’s where the Diet Building, and consequently Shido’s Palace, was. He couldn’t be anywhere else.

There’s silence for a moment, then someone approaches them.

“Man... I can’t believe Ryuji of all people fell asleep beside him,” someone says.

Sakamoto? Is that who the heartbeat he hears belongs to?

“I can’t believe Ryuji of all people was so kind to him in the Palace! ‘You’re more than special’? Where the hell did that come from?”

More footsteps approach, and the bed by Goro’s legs sinks beneath someone’s weight. A hand is placed on his knee. He hates how comforting the gesture is.

“Ryuji has always been a kind person. He isn’t one to judge, unless you obviously deserve it,” Kurusu says. It’s his hand on Goro’s knee.

Someone scoffs. “I’d say Akechi deserves it.”

Kurusu’s hand twitches where it sits. “He’s been through more than any of the Palace rulers we’ve faced. I happen to agree with Ryuji- we should try to be at least a little kinder to him.”

“After what he did!? No way. I can excuse saving his life or whatever, but I refuse to make friends with him.”

That voice was definitely Sakura-san’s daughter. Goro can’t blame her for her stance.

“I’m not trying to force any of you to be friends with him. I’m just asking you not to treat him with cruelty or malice. Be friendly with him,” Kurusu says, his thumb rubbing circles into Goro's leg.

Beside him, Sakamoto stirs. The heartbeat, now a comforting sound, stutters for a moment, then disappears entirely.

“Dude... Did I fall asleep? That’s so embarrasin’...”

Kurusu laughs again. “What, comforted by Akechi’s presence?”

There’s some flustered spluttering, before Sakamoto settles for a solid, squeaked,“ Dude!!”

The door opens. Someone in heels comes in, and Sakamoto moves. Someone takes his place.

“...He’s concious,” a woman’s voice declares after a moment of silence. Immediately, the room errupts into various cries of shock. He picks out more than a few ‘for real’s.

“He should be fully awake in a few minutes. Especially if you all keep shouting like this,” the woman continues, but her tone isn’t rude at all.

“Thanks, Takemi. We really appreciate your work,” Kurusu says, and the woman named Takemi rests her hand on Goro’s chest, over his heart. She has rings on.

“No problem, kid. It’s my job, after all. Back-alley doctor or no, I’m still responsible for the lives of my patients. I just want to know how you got here so quickly, and without major bloodloss on his end.”

Kurusu goes silent, but Sakamoto picks up the conversation.

“He got shot not too far from here. We sorta booked it after it happened, since Akira told us you were a doctor and could probably help him more than them at the hospital.”

That’s not what happened. He didn’t get shot in Yongen. Nowhere close to it. How did they get him here, to this place?

Takemi doesn’t reply. She just rises to her feet, takes her hand off his chest. He misses the weight.

“...Take care of him, okay? If he can’t stay with family in the area, let him stay with one of you. I don’t want him travelling around any more than necessary.”

“Aye aye, Takemi. We’ll keep him safe and sound,” Kurusu says, and Takemi leaves.

Someone’s breathing in his face. He continues to lay there, unmoving. Playing dead, his brain supplies. A terrible attempt at comedy.

“I know you’re awake, jackass. Open your eyes and face us.”

“Futaba, lay off. Just because Doc said he’d wake up soon doesn’t mean he already is,” Sakamoto says. The breathing in his face ceases.

“Look at him! He’s obviously faking it!” Futaba says.

Goro stirs, forcing his eyes open. The light overhead has been turned down, at least, and the blanket over him is fluffy and warm. If not for the presence of everyone, he might roll over and go back to sleep.

He’s so, so tired.

“Akechi! You’re awake. How are you feeling?” Kurusu asks, at his side in a blur. Goro fights back the urge to laugh. Even after trying to kill him two separate times, Akira Kurusu can’t find it in himself to hate him.

“Other than everything hurting... And the insatiable urge to sleep for another week... I feel fine.”

Sakamoto appears behind Kurusu like an eclipse. The sun behind the moon, Goro thinks almost bitterly.

“Dude! Glad to see you’re okay. You had us worried,” he says with a smile bright as ever. Goro makes a point to ignore that ‘us’ likely does not include the Thieves that aren’t currently at his bedside.

Speaking of... Everyone else seems to be almost avoiding him, as though he holds some terrible illness. Perhaps he does.

“Yes, well... Death cannot claim me so easily, it seems. Alas for that,” Goro replies easily, slowly swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. He isn’t wearing a hospital gown- rather a pair of grey sweatpants and a white shirt. When did he change? How did he change?

Perhaps Kurusu can tell where his gaze lies, because he offers an explaination.

“Oh, yeah. Takemi had some spare clothes in here for patients that had to stay longer term... We got lucky that they fit you,” he says. Goro is getting extremely good at ignoring certain aspects of what people say to him.

“...Give her my thanks. Did I have any belongings when we left the Metaverse?” Goro asks, rising to his feet. He’s less graceful than he would hope; his legs are shaky, and he stumbles a bit at first- ending up grasping Sakamoto’s shoulder in an attempt to steady himself.

Sakamoto, thankfully, keeps his mouth firmly shut about it. Instead he says,“ Nope. Just yourself and a model gun. We couldn’t bring that here, obviously. So we sorta... left it. Sorry, man.”

“No, don’t apologise,” he says. Sakamoto looks mildly surprised. Goro says nothing about it.

“...We should figure out a place for Akechi to stay. I think we can rule out Boss’s house, my own, and Haru’s,” Nijima says, her voice gentle but firm.

“I live in the dorms, so I will not be able to take him in,” Kitagawa chimes in.

Ann shifts uncomfortably from foot to foot. “I would love to, but... I don’t think I could explain it to my parents. It’d be too risky.”��

Goro has all but resigned himself to trying to get back into his apartment when Sakamoto speaks up.

“Ah, hell. I’ll take ‘im. Ma won’t care- I think she’d actually be happy. It’d mean I’m ‘makin’ new friends’ or whatever. You know.”

He shrugs as though what he said wasn’t horrifically depressing, and everyone else seems perfectly content with this outcome.

Goro ignores the relief on their faces. He ignores the way Sakamoto shifts their position so his arm is slung around Sakamoto’s shoulder- essentially using him as a human crutch. He ignores the way Futaba looks at Sakamoto like he’s lost his mind.

He ignores the way he agrees with her.

“Ma! I’m home!” Sakamoto shouts into the apartment.

It is considerably less lavish than Goro’s own, but it’s far more homey. There are pictures of Sakamoto at various stages in his life hanging on the wall- Goro sees him elementary age, hair dark and wild, a yellow shirt on his back and a gap-toothed grin on his face. He sees middle school Sakamoto, likely around first year, running in a race. He’s the one crossing the finish line.

The kitchen/dining room/living room are all in various states of disarray, but for some reason none of it seems ‘messy’. The kitchen has clean dishes placed in a rack by the sink (accompanied by a few dirty ones in the sink).

The dining table has magazines and papers and books strewn across its surface, along with a very healthy looking flower in a vase.

The living room sofa has blankets and pillows tossed haphazardly on it, and Goro even spots a plushie or two. There’s no coffee table, but if there was Goro suspects there would be all sorts of eclectic messiness there.

“Oh, uh... Sorry for the mess. Everything is kinda shitty right now...”

Sakamoto trails off, his ears red from embarassment. Goro shrugs.

“So long as I have a bed to sleep in, I’m not about to look a gift horse in the mouth,” he says, and Sakamoto visibly perks up.

“Oh, yeah. We got a guest bedroom, so you don’t even hafta worry about sharin’ my room. Uh- I don’t know if you were worried about that or not...”

Sakamoto (Goro suspects he should start getting into the habit of calling him Ryuji at least around his mother) shifts uncomfortably again, before once again picking the conversation back up. It’s a gift that leaves Goro feeling a little windswept, like he’s found himself in the path of a storm that can’t decide which way it wants to blow.

“We got food! Plenty of homecooked shit, my ma prefers it over buyin’ stuff from the store. Anything sound good? We probably have it.”

Goro can’t bring himself to speak for a few seconds. Sakamoto is looking at him with such bright earnesty that it leaves him breathless.

Wait. Sakamoto, of all people, leaving him winded? He would expect near anyone else. Kurusu, perhaps. He’s the first one to come to mind. Sakamoto is the last.

“...Do you have any tonkatsu?” He finally forces words out of his too-dry mouth, oddly timid about requesting food at someone’s house. Goro Akechi has never been timid before.

...

“It was reheated, so it won’t taste as good as it did when it was freshly made, but...”

Goro took the plate and placed it on his lap. “Food is food. I don’t have much right to be a picky eater. Thank you for the food.”

Sakamoto- No, Ryuji, he reminds himself- doesn’t respond. He has his own dish of food- fried rice and noodles, it seems- but seems more keen on observing Goro eat his first.

“Are you often in the habit of watching others eat before your own meal?” He can’t help but ask. Ryuji just shrugs, as though Goro asked him about a question a teacher had that day.

“Eh. Not often, but...”

“But?”

Ryuji seems uncomfortable with the conversation. Goro doesn’t care.

“Well, it sorta depends on the circumstances. Whenever one of my friends aren’t feelin’ good, I sorta watch ‘em to make sure they’re okay. Even if it’s somethin’ as dumb as eating.”

Ryuji’s word choice rattled around in Goro’s ears. One of his friends, he had said. Goro was likely reading far too deeply into it, but...

“Dude, if you stare at me any longer I think I might explode. You look like you’re imagining my head as a giant lemon or somethin’.”

Goro blinks himself back into reality, caught off-guard by Ryuji’s example.

“A what-?”

Ryuji looks away, ears flaming red. “When I first dyed my hair, I got told by some girl that I looked like a giant lemon. Ann only made that worse by callin’ me a lemonhead in middle school. Just- a joke between us now, I guess.”

Goro nods once, unsure how else to respond. So he asks another question.

“Why did you dye it?”

Ryuii perks up at that. Bingo, Goro thinks.

“It was actually because Ann kept gettin’ a bunch of shit from people because she was blonde, so I decided to dye my hair. Solidarity, y’know? She got called a whole bunch of names. People were callin’ her an attention whore when she was thirteen, dude! I couldn’t just let those bastards get away with that!”

Goro nods once again, this time completely comprehending. “So you decided to take the target off of her back and place it onto your own with the delinquent shtick.”

Ryuji nods in agreement. “Yeah, pretty much. That’s... Sorta why I keep up the act. It’s hard to keep your tracks completely covered as a Phantom Thief, especially when there are so many of us. But they’re all friends with me, the ‘school delinquent’, so...”

“So you hope that them being friends with a punk will keep others from badgering them about things they don’t wish to discuss, such as the Phantom Thieves.”

Goro has to conclude, it’s a brilliant ploy. Acting tough and scary to ward off anyone who might wish to pester those you love... A clever act unexpected from Ryuji.

“Yeah, that’s basically it. I just wanna give ‘em a little bit of protection if I can. Even if if ain’t for very long.”

Goro tilts his head. What on earth is he on about?

“What on earth are you on about?” He asks. It comes out harsher than he meant it to.

Ryuji scoffs. “C’mon, man. You’re a damn detective and you worked with us. You know what I mean.”

“No, I can’t say that I do.”

Ryuji groans, abandoning his plate on the table beside him. The question of why they’re eating on the sofa and not at the table suddenly hits Goro. He pushes it down and out of sight.

“Dude! Pretty much the only thing I’m good for on the team is givin’ and takin’ hits. I wanna- I wanna help them more. Even if all I can do is take even more hits in the real world, too. I mean- the most useful thing I’ve ever done for the team was almost die, so.”

Goro freezes. Ryuji... Almost died? After he risked his own life in an attempt to keep the others safe?

“What-?”

Now it’s Ryuji’s turn to freeze up. “Oh, uh... Did Aki not tell you? Man... Well, um. When Shido’s Palace went down, two things happened. One, was Futaba pickin’ up your signal again and Aki rushin’ to save you. Apparently he used his MetaNav to get the both of ya outta there. The second thing was me runnin’ to the lifeboats to trigger them in time. I blew up, but I managed to use my Nav to get out right before I hit the water.”

“...Why... The hell would you describe me being saved first-!? I don’t give a shit about me, I asked about you!”

Ryuji reels back like Goro just slapped him, hands up as though to protect himself from the ex-detective’s odd burst of wrath.

“Dude! Akechi, quit yellin’! The neighbours’ll call the police, and that’ll be a whole new world of shit for us.”

Goro takes a breath, sinking back into the cushions of the sofa. He glares at Ryuji, but the Zio user doesn’t quail. Rather, they meet each other’s gaze- and Goro fights a shiver that threatens to run down his spine.

As far as Goro knows, no one can use their Persona’s power outside of the Metaverse. So why the hell does the air seem so electrified all of a sudden?

“Secondly, I don’t give a shit about me neither, so we’re in the same boat on that one. Whatever shit happened, or happens, to me is nothin’ compared to what you all have been through. I mean- you especially.”

“You almost died, Sakamoto. How is that nothing?” Goro hopes Ryuji doesn’t point out that-

“You did too, asshole. Don’t gimme that shit,” Ryuji grumbles.

Damn him.

“Yes, well-”

Goro sighs. He hates the Phantom Thieves. Half of them hate his guts (rightfully so). Kurusu is the only one he feels he can carry a conversation with, because Ryuji often leaves him without the proper words unless they were having an argument.

“Dude, I swear. If you pull the ‘you’re a better person than me’ card I will actually throw rice at you,” Ryuji threatens, and he sounds so sincere it startles a laugh out of Goro.

“I beg your pardon?” He asked, covering his mouth with his hand. Second nature from so many years in the detective scene, hiding his mirth behind a mask of polite indifference.

“...You’re pardoned, or whatever,” Ryuji grumbles, and Goro resists the urge to laugh more. What in the hell was wrong with him? Ryuji Sakamoto, drawing genuine laughs out of him?

He needs to get a grip.

Goro insists on doing the dishes after they eat, if not for any other reason than to be left with his thoughts. Ryuji protests, as expected, but eventually (after a long bickering session) lets him do the chore.

Ryuji putters around the living-dining areas, putting the papers into stacks and putting the throw pillows back where they belong.

Goro watches him with a keen eye, taking in every little detail. The gentle way Ryuji handles the papers, the care in his hands as he prunes the flower on the table.

The little smile that graces his lips as the theme song for Featherman NEO plays on the TV, the way he nods his head to the beat long after it’s disappeared from the screen.

The way he spikes his hair with his hands sometimes, the way he holds himself off of his left leg.

The way he seems to keep glancing at Goro, only to hurriedly look away again with red ears. Perhaps shame at being caught gaping.

It’s maddening, trying to decipher the meaning behind his glances. There seems to be no malice, or even remorse at taking him in. But there’s no warm smile or radiant grin to give away the meaning either.

So Goro remains silent, bordering sullen, at the enigma that is Ryuji Sakamoto.

For the time being, at least.

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! THE LONG AWAITED GORO AKECHI BIRTHDAY FIC!!!!! WITH RYUGORO ADDED!!!!!

aghhhahahgghhhhh.... ryuji sleeping next to akechi and getting embarassed by akira saying he's comforted by akechi's presence. love the way akira doesnt force futaba or anyone to forgive him but just not to absolutely despise him. hehe akechi forcing himself to call him ryuji "because of his mom" yeah i know what you are. and the fact that he cares for ryuji. he yells at him for risking his life and prioritizing akechi's. gahh they love each other and cover it up with hate. they're like two sides of the same coin GHHHSGSGGVVB speaking of which they should have given akechi more showtimes with other PTs for example: ryuji. akechi x ryuji showtime would go insane.

anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THAT BASTARD AKECHI!!!!!

#nero answers #stars-and-loops #goro akechi #persona #persona 5 #p5 #ryuji sakamoto #ryugoro #persona 5 spoilers #p5 spoilers

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wulfhalls · 2 years ago

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1/2 When you stop and realize that Billy’s entire relapse during Chicago wasn’t just about Camila threatening to leave him but really stemmed from him being forced for the first time to acknowledge what he’s spent everyday of the last three years fighting to bury and ignore: that he’s deeply in love with Daisy. Because the morning of the Chicago show he starts off his day in his Daisy love bubble openly expressing his desire to spend the next 20 years by her side writing together, fighting together, making art together, and everything inbetween. It’s Daisy that first forced him to acknowledge that they’re in love with each other and the bubble bursts, because she’s finally addressing the elephant in the room: that she’s in love with him and she wants more, she wants more than to just be his creative partner and artistic muse, she wants to be his partner in all ways. And you can see in that moment when she says it that Billy just…deflates because deep down he realizes that nothing will ever be the same again. He can’t have both Camila and Daisy by his side forever, it’s not fair to either woman. He’s finally being forced to see that. Which is why he gets desperate and says that even though he wants that too, but won’t leave Camila, he wants he and Daisy to stay trapped in this purgatory of their own making: sharing their deepest, most intimate, and raw feelings with one another but only thru their music, never actually feeling it in the “real world.” He’s clinging on to whatever bullshit rationalizations he can try and make to himself to hold onto Daisy at that point that I don’t think he even realized how much he shattered her heart by asking her “isn’t this enough?” Isn’t it enough for us to just stay here in purgatory with one another because I would rather suffer here with you everyday and never fully have you than ever be without you? It’s only when Camila confronts him in Chicago that Billy realizes he can’t have both Daisy and Camila in his life like this anymore. He lies to Camila’s face, several times. First he insists nothing at all is going on it’s just an “act” and then he lies to her again when he says he kissed her but it meant “nothing.” But Camila knows none of it is true, she knows what Billy isn’t strong enough to admit to himself: that he’s in love with Daisy. As Daisy did earlier in the day, Camila forces him to admit to not only himself but to her, and it’s so incredibly painful for Billy to do that not only can he refuse to lie and say that he doesn’t love Daisy, but he can’t even look Camila in the eye while doing so. Daisy showing up at that moment in the hallway was the final straw for Billy because in that moment he could no longer run away from the reality of their situation: here are both Camila and Daisy standing in front of him and he has to let one of them go. Camila tells him she’s done and leaves which triggers all of his abandonment and daddy issues, which is why in that moment I think it was easier for him to revert to his baseline of “I told her the truth that nothing happened and nothing ever will” even though he knows it’s a lie, because he’s still clinging onto his desire to keep everything as it was, he doesn’t want anything to change because once it does he will have to lose Daisy, as by his own words “she’s my wife…I’m never gonna leave her.” So in typical Billy fashion he callously and cruelly tells Daisy they will never be more than what they are now and goes after Camila, because maybe if he can fix this, fix them, he can try and get this sinking ship back on course. When Camila ignores his phone calls, and doesn’t show up to the show on time Billy breaks and fully gives into his addiction, if his world is going to implode then he wants it to implode with Daisy by his side, he wants them to be “broken together.” But what Billy fails to recognize in that moment is that it will never be enough for Daisy. She doesn’t want to be broken with him, she doesn’t want to be with him because his life imploded. She wants to be whole with him. Whole, healed, and complete together.

2/2 It’s one of the most devastating moments I’ve seen written on screen. I honestly think that of all the times Billy broke Daisy’s heart, and there were plenty, that this….this was the one that hurt her the most. (And is actually something I would love to see addressed if they did make a Season 2). Daisy’s refusal to spiral with Billy is what finally snaps him out of it, and when they head onto the stage for Look at Us Now, Billy already knows that it’s over, that he’s already lost Daisy. But he still can’t bring himself to walk away from her until she forces him too. Billy loved Daisy so much he was willing to live in hell everyday for the rest of his life, torturing them both by not being together, but not being willing to stay away from one another. Daisy loved him enough to realize that wasn’t enough and that she needed to walk away and let him go because they both deserved so much more than this. So much more than being stuck. And ultimately this was the real root of Billy’s relapse that day, having to finally walk away from the possibility of Daisy. As TJR says in the book “I realized that I had been holding on tightly to the possibility…the possibility of Daisy…and I was suddenly having a very hard time with letting that go, of saying never.” The show did such a good job of conveying this moment from the book because on the surface it seems that all of his turmoil is over losing Camila and his family, when really the root cause was Billy having to finally accept that he has to say goodbye to Daisy. As he knew deep down he wouldn’t leave Camila and that they would probably be able to recover from this. But losing Daisy? His heart would never fully recover from that.

u said in this essay I will and in this essay u DID. yall just giving me these beautifully written novel length takes for FREE.

#im just out here saying the most inconsequential shit ever and u guys are just serving insight understanding and coherence #ur all so sexi and smart #ur really doing all of that while im just divorce blogging we are not the same ur so much better its unrealsjdjdjd #daisybilly #daisy jones and the six #djats #that tweet that was like he was a mess and spiralling because his wife knew how much he wanted daisy all the goddamn time. yeah.jpeg #cant wait for s2 and camila in her skylar white esque era lets go polite courtesy and icy silences #i fucked eddie :D

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