#idk why i started doing this bc now i have to do it for all my actors
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SO IT GOES - chapter 5
Paige Bueckers x oc Warnings: language, sexual themes and language, drinking, not my best work lol Wordcount: 6.6K A/C: so have we come up with a shipname for zari and paige yet?? anyways ty all for the support and sooo much love on the last part - especially those who remained patient for a new part! i've got a LOT of stuff going on rn so please be understanding if parts take a little longer to come out! i wanna write badly but i gotta prioritise real life unless y'all wanna start paying me lol anyways, this should be a rewarding chapter to some of y'all!! anyways go read!!
-
Before London
“The skirt,” my childhood friend Olivia’s voice filters through the speaker, my phone set up on my bed as I try on different outfits for the evening on facetime.
I stare into my reflection, the black miniskirt not leaving much to imagination, my legs fully on display. I sigh, unsure whether it would be too much for the night.
“I don’t know Liv, the dress is a little less revealing though,” I complain, turning around and seeing the way the tight skirt hugs my curves.
“Exactly why you should wear the skirt instead.”
I laugh, shaking my head at her face on my phone screen. “I’m not going there to shag someone. It’s going to be mostly the team anyway.”
“Izzie, you are single now. Act like it. Have you even hooked up with anyone since…?”
I scoff. “Do you think I have time for anything like that?”
“Maybe if you schedule it in…” Olivia jokes, making my mouth fall open feeling offended.
“Hey! I’m perfectly happy being single right now. Love is the last thing I should be thinking about.”
“Well, I still think you should wear the skirt,” the girl answers, making me groan.
“Fine, okay gotta go. I’ll text you!” I wave bye, before hanging up, realising my ride must have arrived. One more glance in the mirror and I decide it will do - the black mini skirt and a matching black cowl neck top, the back draped low to reveal the smooth skin of my back along my spine. The outfit was simple yet sexy, the stacked chunky golden jewelry dressing the look up. I’ve pinned my hair up in a bun, curls falling out as if by accident - in reality the hairdo had taken over 45 minutes to accomplish.
“Good enough,” I murmur to myself, putting on my boots and quickly hurrying out the door. Just like we had agreed, Trey is waiting in an Uber, waving me over. He had sent me a message earlier asking if we could ride together. Of course I had said yes out of politeness. Though if I’m honest, I always felt a little uneasy around him.
“Hey!” I smile politely climbing into the backseat with a potted orchid in my hands.
Trey meets my smile with an even wider one, eyeing me up and down as I buckle my seatbelt.
“Housewarming present?” He asks, pointing to the potted flower. I shrug and nod.
“I didn’t really know what to get them,” I admit, crossing my legs and eyeing the purple and white flower.
“Lala’s gonna love that,” Trey nods, his eyes still locked on me and my outfit. “You look…” he goes silent, and from my peripheral vision I see the man shaking his head. “Really good.”
“Oh, thanks,” I mumble, brushing it off lightheartedly as I grab my phone which is frantically buzzing.
Paige When are u coming? I’m already here and idk anyone Oh nvm Lou and Chris are here So… when u coming???
I feel my stomach doing flips as I read the texts, my mind still swirling with how she’d made me breakfast just earlier this morning. How my couch still smells just like her even hours later. I wasn’t sure what it was, but there was something comforting about her presence. The way she worked to make me laugh, to get me to relax. Like she wanted to take care of me.
Just left so I should be there soon x
Izzie Iz Help We’re drinking wine
Time to be a big girl and learn Paige
But I don’t wanna 🙁 Fine Bc you said so
Good girl
Freaky 😏
Paige
Sorry I pregamed
Of course you did I’ll be there soon x
Giggling at my phone, I place it on my lap, not wanting to be rude towards the man sitting next to me. Trey’s eyes are locked on me, and I can feel myself growing uneasy, especially when I realise I have nothing to talk to him about other than work.
”You excited for tonight?” He asks.
”Yeah, it’s going to be nice to see everyone out of work,” I answer, keeping my composure despite feeling awkward, begging he doesn’t pick up on it. I had become quite good at that (or Trey was more ignorant than I realised).
”Oh yeah, you haven’t really had the chance to do that yet huh?” He asks, his deep voice gravelly.
“Not really no.”
“Well, if you ever get lonely, you can always call me up Zari,” Trey says, reaching over and suddenly placing his hand on mine resting on my lap. I keep still as long as I can before pulling it away, pretending I just needed that specific hand to hold the pot in my lap now.
“Uh, yeah that’s really sweet of you. Thank you,” I chuckle awkwardly. “Paige lives right upstairs actually so I’ve been spending some time with her.”
Trey is taken aback, his brows rising. “Paige?”
“Yeah we’re friends,” I smile. Trey’s dark brown eyes keep watching me, clearly thinking about something till he shrugs and looks away.
The drive is quiet, full of awkward comments by the man clearly eager to make conversation. Normally I was better than this at the small talk that the Americans seemed to love so much - but not today. I could feel my stomach twisting with nerves and butterflies in anticipation for the evening. I wasn’t entirely sure why. But all I knew I was eager to see Paige - she had a way of grounding me.
We finally get to the building, awkwardly accompanying each other in the elevator much like my first day working for the Wings. I’m the one to ring the doorbell, Trey standing close behind me.
“Hey pretty girl!” Lala opens the door with a warm smile. “Oh hey Trey, come in come in!”
She steps aside, letting both of us in. The hallway is long and the ceilings are high, the space modern but filled with gorgeous furniture bringing warmth into the space.
“Wow, beautiful,” I gasp looking around.
“Issa work in process,” Lala laughs. I catch a glimpse into the open concept kitchen/living room, filled with people who had arrived on time unlike me and Trey (our Uber had taken a “shortcut”, which ended up taking 15 minutes longer than the normal drive.) I could tell alcohol was already flowing from the loud laughs echoing around the apartment.
“Oh, here you go!” I smile, handing Lala the orchid. “I wasn’t sure what you two wanted so I hope that’s okay.”
Lala gasps, admiring the plant. “No, this is gorg! And so are you, look at that skirt girl.”
I blush a little as she spins me around, admiring my outfit.
“Is it too short?” I ask but Lala looks at me with raised brows. It’s then I notice her skirt is just as short, if not shorter. “Nevermind!”
The woman laughs, wrapping an arm around my waist and bringing me further into the apartment. My eyes immediately land on Paige next to Arike, both taking up half of the couch as if partaking in the Olympics of manspreading. Their laughs rise above the chatter of the crowd, making them impossible to miss. Even if subconsciously I had been looking for the blonde the second I stepped in.
“Yeah�� they’re already drunk, thought you should know,” Lala nods towards the two.
“I heard, Paige was texting me already.”
The woman turns to me grinning a little. “Of course she was.” I’m not exactly sure what it means but don’t get the opportunity to ask before I hear a loud screech interrupting the both of us.
“Izzie!!” Paige gasps, her voice soaring above the noise. She climbs off the couch, rushing to me through the crowd. To my surprise the blonde wraps her arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug. I can’t help the smile that spreads to my face. It comes naturally, when my arms wrap around her neck, pulling her in. Like since our first hug this morning, physical closeness felt easy. She smells like deodorant, sandalwood and a hint of alcohol. Breaking the hug, I eye her fit up and down - the olive cuban collar shirt and shorts in a matching pattern, two silver chains dangling on her neck, hair in a slicked back bun.
All while I’ve been admiring Paige’s outfit, her gaze has been roaming across my body, taking me in. I notice a hint of red burning on her cheeks when her blue eyes land on my skirt. Suddenly I have the strongest need for a drink. Our stares meet, and for a fleeting moment I think she’s about to say something. But before she can, Arike is pulling me into a friendly hug.
“So glad you came, Zari! Whatchu wanna drink?”
I feel flustered, barely hearing her. Clearing my throat, I finally answer, feeling the blonde’s eyes boring into me.
“White wine please?”
Lala laughs, shaking her head and grabbing my shoulders. “You’re gonna need something stronger to keep up with us baby.”
I laugh. “Okay, tequila soda then?”
“Attagirl, lime?”
“Yes please,” I nod, watching Lala and Arike head towards the kitchen island covered in bottles of booze and glasses, leaving me alone with Paige.
For the first time in weeks, there’s a sense of awkwardness between us, neither of us knowing what to say. I wanted to tell her she looks good, that the olive against her skin that had grown more tan in Dallas made her glow in a way I had never seen before. But something in my throat doesn’t allow the words to come out. Thankfully the booze in Paige’s system makes her miss the weird tension completely.
“You look,” she starts, stepping closer to me, arm brushing against mine. She shakes her head, looking me up and down which is enough to make my ears burn. “Never seen you look like this before.”
I tilt my head, meeting her blue eyes challengingly. “Is that supposed to be a compliment?”
To my enjoyment, this makes her flustered, her cheeks bright pink now.
“You know it is ma,” she grins.
“You and that bloody nickname,” I shake my head, rolling my eyes at the blonde, when Lala and Arike return to us with my drink.
“You guys wanna play beer pong?” Arike asks as I grab the glass from Lala.
“What is this, a frat house?” Paige laughs, making Lala groan.
“Trust, it wasn’t my choice.”
-
After a long debate between me, Izzie, Arike and Lala on who should be teaming up, we decided that the only fair combination was me with Lala, while Arike and Izzie played against us - the girls claiming it wouldn’t be right for the two hoopers to play beer pong against non-athletes. Honestly, I barely had listened to the conversation at all. Because the way Izzie looks tonight has me grasping the drink in my hand so tight my knuckles were beginning to turn white. My mind is travelling to the filthiest places at the thought of what is underneath the hemline of her skirt, her glowy legs making me weak in the knees. Even worse was the low, scooped back of her shirt, her spine’s movement visible as she walked around the room. I couldn’t take my eyes off her, I couldn’t even stop the trembling of my hands. I needed to get more drinks in me quickly.
It seemed like the dark haired girl had the same idea, downing her first tequila soda in a matter of minutes as we set up the game. The tension often visible on her face only to me was slowly beginning to melt away.
“We’re about to win aight?” I tell Lala next to me, which makes Izzie let out a loud scoff.
“You really think I’ll let you win Bueckers?” The dark haired girl asks, challenging me.
“Yo, who’s the athlete here,” I respond, an arrogant grin on my face but she won’t back down, catlike eyes staring me down at the opposite end of the table.
“You’re enormously underestimating my desire to win.”
“Oh yeah?”
Izzie nods. “Yes Paige.”
And she’s right. I don’t know if it’s the alcohol already flowing in my system, or the way Izara looks, her green eyes locked on me everytime I bounce the ball off the table but my aim is off. And somehow she keeps aiming perfectly, a sly grin and her sharp eyes glimmering as she makes me drink one cup of beer after another, after another until Lala is the one to call it off, admitting defeat gracefully.
Arike and Izara hug, celebrating their win, but I can’t even be mad - the way Izzie’s mouth is stretched into a wide smile, the way she was letting go off her disciplined, hard exterior as a result of the alcohol was such a joy to watch I could’ve soaked in it forever.
“I told you! I told you!” Iz laughs, coming over to me and getting up in my face. But all I’m doing is smirking, my hand snaking around her waist and pulling her close without thinking about it much. But she doesn’t pull away either, even when our fronts nearly press together, heat radiating between us. The party has turned loud, drunk people bumping into each other, yelling over the music, but all I see is the dark haired girl in front of me, and the blush on her cheeks.
“You were cheating Iz,” I tell her, heavy eyes gazing down at the girl.
“How?” She asks, stunned.
I shrug. “I dunno.” I did know. It was that damn outfit. It took every ounce of self-discipline I had not to drag her to the bathroom and pull that skirt up. How was I expected to aim while my thoughts were running out of control.
“Here you areeeee!” Satou’s voice interrupts the moment, making me stumble backwards and letting go of the girl in my arms realising how close I’d been to losing control and leaning down to kiss her.
Satou hugs both me and Iz, looking around for the couple of the hour who have suddenly disappeared. “Where the lovebirds at?” She asks, holding a wrapped present in her hands. I chuckle shrugging but Zari lets out a giggle.
“Last I saw them they were getting pretty cosy,” she laughs, leaning into my side whether on purpose or on accident I’m not sure. But it leaves my skin tingling.
“No one’s surprised,” Satou laughs, waving her friend over. “Savannah, this is Paige and… Izara, right?”
“She prefers Zari,” I correct before Iz can even say a word. From my peripheral vision I see her head snap to me, eyes growing softer as they land on me. I could tell she was happy with me, which made me want to get on my knees and beg for her to let me serve her forever. Okay, no, let me get a grip.
“Whassup,” I nod at Savannah, who smiles at both me and Izzie. Suddenly, the girl beside me stumbles as someone bumps into her, crashing straight into me.
“Woah,” I grab a hold of her, my hand naturally landing on the small of her back. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” she giggles, watching me and her nose scrunching as her face twists into a laugh. The sparkling eyeshadow covering her eyelids makes her shine even more, curled strands falling onto her face out of the updo her long, dark hair is in. She looks so beautiful I feel breathless, even more so up close.
“You want a drink ma? I could use one,” I ask, staring into the green of her eyes, feeling the alcohol too much to realise that our faces are only inches away at this point.
She rolls her eyes. “Paige, I hate that nickname.”
“Do you want a drink or not woman?” I ask annoyed, teasing her. But her face hardens, and her eyes sharpen.
“Excuse me?”
Her tone is hard and serious, making my lower abdomen flip. As inappropriate as it feels, I’m exceptionally turned on.
I swallow, biting my lower lip. “Uh…”
“Woman?” She interrupts me, furrowing her brows. I can feel heat pooling between my legs, making my mind spin.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble, my voice coming out shaky from how flustered my thoughts had turned me.
“What’s that?” She asks, brows rising as she watches my mouth expectantly.
“I’m sorry Izzie,” I say louder, my chest heaving now. To my surprise, I notice her breathing is growing heavy too.
“Mhm, that’s better,” she nods, eyes still on my mouth as I bite down on my lower lip. And for just a second, as my eyes flicker from her eyes to her glossed lips, I consider leaning in and pressing a kiss on them, mind jumping to how she might taste. Like heaven I bet.
“So a drink then?” Iz asks, interrupting my spinning thoughts.
“Oh right, yeah,” I compose myself, “we’ll be right back.”
We leave Satou and Savannah alone, my hand on the small of Izara’s back guiding her through the people to the kitchen island.
“What do we want to drink?” The girl asks, looking at the row of bottles lining the counter. I lean in even closer to her side, letting my hand drag from her back to around her waist. The girl’s breath hitches audibly, yet she doesn’t pull back.
“Shots! Now!” Arike suddenly interrupts us, Lala following close behind her.
“Bro where you been?” I ask, watching as she begins to pour shots of vodka for all four of us. Her and Lala exchange a look that tells me I don’t want to know the answer to my question.
“Nevermind,” I mumble, making Izzie giggle, the alcohol finally loosening her up.
“No, I really shouldn’t,” the dark haired girl shakes her head, pushing the shot away.
“Oh c’mooonnn!!” I groan, pushing it back.
“Yeah Zari, c’mon,” Rike complains.
I pick up my own shot glass, and Izara’s as well, bringing it to her lips. She’s considering, meeting my gaze, until her pretty lips open and I tip the glass, pouring the shot into her mouth as I throw my head back, swallowing mine.
“Holy shit,” I cough, making everyone around me laugh, looking at the dark haired girl whose face doesn’t even twitch from the alcohol. Damn.
“And another oneeee,” Arike laughs, now pouring tequila into the glasses, clearly trying to get us two drunk. I glare at her, picking up on what she was up to. But Rike merely winks at me, handing us salt and lemon slices.
“Oh boy,” Izara chuckles, eyeing the alcohol. I follow closely as her tongue darts out to lick her wrist, my mind spinning with dirty thoughts involving that tongue between my le-
“Lemon!” The girl yelps, squeezing her eyes shut having taken the shot. I quickly grab the slice from the counter, holding Izzie’s face still by her chin as I place the wedge between her lips. Her teeth bite into it, sucking on the bitter fruit to get rid of the taste in her mouth.
Her dark lashes flutter open, and she pulls away with a grin. “Your turn.”
I scratch the back of my neck, feeling my tongue already growing numb from the alcohol, my speech certainly beginning to slur soon.
“Yo Zari, you should let Paige lick the salt from your wrist,” Arike yells from the opposite side of the counter, earning a slap on the shoulder from Lala.
“Huh?” Izara laughs, turning to the pair.
“Ignore her, God knows I do,” Lala rolls her eyes.
Flustered, I fumble with the salt shaker, licking it off my hand and downing the shot of tequila, feeling the burn in my throat making me want to cough. To my surprise, Iz brings the slice of lemon to my lips, the bitter taste putting an end to the burn.
I can feel the alcohol hitting, making my cheeks burn - or maybe it’s the way the dark haired girl is looking at me, her eyes even more catlike than normal, sparkling in the dimmed lighting. Either way I can feel my brain and mouth beginning to slow down, yet my words and actions seem simultaneously sped up, like I couldn’t think them through before doing.
“I’mma admit, I’m drunk as fuck,” I laugh, making Izara throw her head back and let out a bright chuckle, grabbing onto my shoulder as she does. Fuck she looks hotter than usual, the hard, poised exterior breaking, letting me catch little glimpses into her internal life, reminiscent of the softness on her face when she fell asleep on me.
“Let’s run away before Arike makes us take more shots,” she whispers and simultaneously somehow screams, grabbing my arm and dragging me down behind the island, as if Arike and Lala weren’t standing right on the other side, watching the two of us. Still I let her, crouching behind it and letting her drag me wherever she wants to.
-
I love Dallas! Or maybe I should reconsider when I’m sober, but now that the shots and drinks had been flowing, I had decided I loved Dallas for certain. Paige and I have been hiding behind a corner, by the entrance to Arike’s and Lala’s bedroom, for the past hour, giggling and talking. I’ve realised Paige might be one of my favourite people I’ve ever met, the strain in my abs a reminder of how easily she made me laugh. How effortless it was to spend time with her, like I didn’t have to put up any exterior or front. I felt comfortable being myself with her. So naturally, in my drunken state, the words slip from my lips easily.
“You’re like, my favourite person right now,” I giggle, leaning my back against the cool wall and watching upwards at her. Paige’s eyes are heavy and red as a result of the alcohol, hair somehow still neatly slicked back, however a button on her chest left unbuttoned, displaying that she definitely wasn’t wearing a bra under the shirt.
“Yeah?” Paige asks, a proud smirk on her face. She’s standing in front of me, arms crossed.
“Don’t let it get into your head darling,” I scoff, pushing her off by her abdomen, feeling the muscles there tighten when my fingertips graze her through the shirt. For whatever reason I’d been wanting her to touch me all night, enjoying the times she wrapped her arm around my waist, or guided me through a crowd. It felt good to be touched, so I didn’t worry about what it meant further. I just wanted her hands on me. Like you’d want to hug a friend after remembering how much you love them.
“Why do you get to have all these nicknames but I don’t get to call you ma?” She asks, stumbling back but returning to her prior position, if not a little closer. I place my hands on her waist, having to tilt my head to look at her - that’s how close she is.
“Why do you want to call me ma?”
“Because,” she groans, looking for something to say. “Ion know it suits you.”
“Why?” I laugh.
“Because you’re sexy.”
I’m drunk. And I know it’s because I’m drunk. It has to be. But I can feel myself begin to throb between my legs when Paige says those words, when her teeth bite onto her bottom lip, when she looks me up and down. Suddenly I’m painfully aware of the swirling in my lower abdomen, the heat spreading straight to my core.
The blonde rubs the bridge of her nose. “Ahh shit Iz, I didn’t mean it like that. My bad. You just look really damn good. In like a friend wa-”
“You think I look sexy?”
It’s like my mouth and brain aren’t working together, the words just forming and leaving my lips without a single thought or action to stop them. For some reason it comes out almost whiny. Like I want her opinion, her reassurance.
Paige looks surprised, clenching her jaw before kissing her teeth and licking her lips, hands twitching as if for something to touch.
“I meannn… you really gotta ask that?” She says hoarsely, stepping closer and placing her hands on my hips. It feels good, but I want more, pushing my body off the wall and pressing my front against her. The sparks are immediate, and I nearly groan at the contact.
“You didn’t answer,” I demand, staring into the blues of her eyes. Only then I realise how blue they really are, like a turquoise ocean against a sandy beach, inviting, beautiful. My heart begins to pound, even more so when I feel Paige’s hands move from my waist, downwards to my hips, to the small of my back, and finally to my ass.
“Perfect,” she coos.
The breath she lets out is heavy, loud, but I barely register, my mouth parting a little. To say the chills travelling through my body are overwhelming would be an understatement, my mind suddenly spinning with realisation of something I’d been feeling for a while, yet only recognised now.
“Is this okay?” Paige asks, making me nod my head. When I do so I feel the blonde’s hands squeeze just a little, forcing a breathy whimper to spill from my lips. Overcome with the urge to be even closer to her, I wrap my arms around the girl’s broad shoulders and lean my head into the crook of her neck, my body slotting against hers just right. It feels euphoric.
“Baby I would leave too if I was Paige, that poor girl got to deal with you on a daily basis alr-”
Suddenly Lala’s voice grows louder as she turns the corner, Arike on her tail.
“Oh, sorry y’all,” the woman gasps seeing us embracing, Paige’s hands resting on my ass. Embarrassed, I pull away, nearly pushing the blonde off of me.
“Uh, I need a drink,” I murmur, my thoughts moving so quickly they make no sense, not even entirely sure what just happened in a drunken hue.
“Yoooo,” I hear Arike snickering, and Lala shutting her up.
Paige follows close behind me all the way back to the kitchen island, people around the apartment now notably drunker, louder, stumbling into each other. “You aight?”
“Yeah, yes. I am,” I murmur, pouring whatever booze there was in reach into a glass and downing it, attempting to calm the running thoughts trying to make sense of all of this.
“You sure ma?”
Fuck. The nickname. Suddenly it’s making my core burn, and I feel arousal pooling between my legs almost uncomfortably. Maybe that nickname wasn’t so bad. Maybe it got me so hot and bothered I could barely think. Maybe I wanted her to call me that and only that for the rest of my life.
“Mm, I’m sure,” I mumble, turning to look at the tall blonde beside me, the way some of the buttons on her shirt have come undone, the way she’s eyeing me back, her veiny hands wrapping around a bottle as she pours herself another drink, the chains on her neck, dangling into her shirt. It’s then when I realise - I want to fuck Paige Bueckers.
“Here you are, Paige! Have you seen Satou?” Savannah interrupts us, but my eyes are still stuck on the blonde next to me.
“No, I got no idea where she is sorry.”
“What about your girlfriend, she seen her?”
Suddenly my eyes snap from Paige to the stranger leaning over the island, blinking stupidly.
“I’m not her girlfriend,” I say sternly, my tone harder than it needs to be. I could feel myself getting overwhelmed.
“Wh- oh shit, I’m sorry. You two just seem like a coup-”
“We’re not together,” Paige interrupts her, clearly picking up on my stress levels rising. I feel the room spinning, my breathing growing shallow, my cheeks burning up.
Lala, who had been watching me and the blonde all night, swiftly walks over and grabs me by the waist. “Come with me baby,” she coos, her voice caring and affectionate as she walks me into the couple’s bedroom, closing the door behind us, separating me from everything causing the engulfing emotions.
“Sit down Zari, I’ll get you some water.”
I do as the older woman says, feeling embarrassed, just praying to any God that I didn’t cause a scene. I could feel my head spinning still, the effect from the alcohol still flowing in my bloodstream.
Lala returns and hands me a glass. I chug it down, handing it back to the woman and staring at the floor.
“Are you alright?” Lala asks, sitting next to me and following me closely. I rub my forehead, shrugging.
“I’m sorry, I think I’m more drunk than I realised,” I murmur but the woman shakes your head.
“I think it’s more than that, Zari.”
I look at her, a knowing expression on the woman’s face.
“What do you mean?”
“It’s Paige isn’t it, you like her?”
I sigh, not even sure how to answer that question. Not sure at all what the feelings swirling inside me meant.
“I… I just think I’m drunk-”
“She likes you,” Lala interrupts me. I take her words in, blinking slowly as I do. Paige likes me?
“How do you know?” I ask in a moment of vulnerability. Something about the older woman made me feel safe.
Lala chuckles, shaking her head. “I think everybody knows baby.”
Oh.
I’m speechless for once, staring at the wall, recounting every interaction I had ever had with the blonde girl. My friend. Could she really like me? Worse of all, have I led her on?
“Look, just be careful alright. Don’t give her the wrong idea if… you know, you don’t feel the same,” Lala rubs my shoulders, like reading my thoughts. It all confused me, my feelings most of all - and deep deep down I wasn’t sure about what I felt, my mind an entangled, confusing pile of perplexity.
-
“Hey you alright?” Paige murmurs to me, pressing into my back as I’m pouring myself more water in the kitchen after my little breather. My body is covered in chills once more by her proximity - which must be a sign I like her at least a little bit. Or maybe I’m just needy for someone to touch me. I was drunk after all, and it had been a while. But then again, these chills always occurred when the blonde’s hands were on me, sometimes even when they were not. Just a simple look was enough.
“Yeah, I felt a little dizzy. Feel better now though,” I murmur, finishing another glass of water.
Paige hesitates, chewing on her cheek, clearly in her head as I turn around and notice her expression. “I didn’t do too much ri-”
“Here you are!! I love this song, come dance!” A drunk Satou interrupts the moment, dragging both me and the blonde into the living room, not giving us much choice in the matter.
“Song’s almost over,” Paige chuckles, glancing at me as I shrug but follow the two hoopers.
“Who cares, I love it!” Satou laughs. We’re surrounded by a few others, dancing to the Drake song echoing around the apartment. As the beat fades out, I hear the soft melody of What You Heard by Sonder take over.
“Nooo, boo, I’mma go ask for more Drake,” Satou murmurs, walking off, leaving me and Paige alone.
Our gazes meet and we chuckle at the same time at the girl who just left, clearly even drunker than me and Paige.
“Fuck your mind up, waste time, I'm prone to that, do it all the time, Keep your guard up or wait in line”
“This song is actually fire,” Paige grins and I nod.
“It is.”
I take a dip in her blue eyes, finding comfort in them as the song plays, not at all shocked when Paige steps closer and grabs a hold of my waist, swaying with me. The alcohol is still pumping through my veins, making it easy to wrap my arms around her neck without thinking what it might mean. It felt good to be close to her, so what?
“What's the word? Tell me what you've heard, Don't tell me what to do, just tell me when it hurts.”
Paige sings along to the lyrics, the tiniest bit off-key yet something about it makes me grow flustered quickly, mind flashing with images of her doing exactly what the lyrics describe.
“What's the word? Tell me what you've heard, Don't tell me what to do, just tell me when it hurts, When I get you to myself, it's murder,” I sing back to Paige, our eyes meeting. Her eyelids are heavy from the drinks, and there’s a hint of a smirk on her face. Her silver chains sparkle in the dim lighting, but all I’m looking at is the way she’s staring me down.
Something about the alcohol makes me bold, pressing my body closer to hers, my fingernails scratching into the back of her neck gently, watching as her eyes nearly flutter shut at the contact.
“You be wildin', I be wildin', too, But not like you, shit, maybe a little like you, Maybe we ain't so different, maybe I be trippin', too,” we sing to each other, the blonde’s thumbs rubbing circles on my hips as we dance together. I feel the burn from earlier spread to my core once more, making it hard to think clearly.
Our faces are inching closer, to the point where I can feel her hot breath on my skin. My heart begins to pound and it becomes difficult to keep my eyes open. Paige licks her lips, leaning downwards. For a moment I think she’s about to kiss me, the distance between us growing smaller and smaller - until she ghosts my lips, turning her face, mouth hovering right over my ear, warm breath tickling against my skin.
“If he was a winner, Girl, you wouldn't have to worry 'bout a damn thing, If I was up in it, shit, I bet a pound that I'd put it down, Make you forget that you was ever with him,” she murmurs into my ear with the lyrics of the song, left hand staying on my hip, right hand coming up to the back of my head to hold it still as we keep swaying to the melody.
I feel flustered, my cheeks growing hotter and my core aching for something. No, not for something - for Paige.
“And I hate talking 'bout my stroke game, But girl, I'm giving you the whole thing,” she murmurs with a deep, hoarse voice, my body tingling and on fire at the same time.
Turning my face, my nose brushes into the blonde’s, but I’m too scared to open my eyes, too scared that if I do I’ll start thinking again, realising how senseless this entire situation is.
Paige’s nose nuzzles mine, and I can hear the shallowness of her breathing, her hand at the back of my head maneuvering me in a way so our lips are hovering over each other. I feel like I might pass out, my heart trying to race out of my chest at this point.
“Paige, Zari, I finally found herrrr!” Satou shouts over the crowd, making both of us pull away. My eyes shoot open and I see the girl holding her friend Savannah.
“Oh! Good!” I smile awkwardly, Paige’s hands still on me.
“Jesus…” The blonde murmurs to herself, looking around clearly frustrated by the unwelcome interruption. “You wanna go to the balcony for, uh, some fresh air?”
“Yeah,” I nod, without thinking. I let the tall girl walk me onto the balcony, closing the door behind us.
Fresh air it is not, the weather a hot and humid warning for the approaching scorching Dallas summer. But it still feels right to be alone with Paige, under the dark Texas sky. I glance upwards, looking at the stars to avoid meeting the blonde’s stare.
“So damn hot,” Paige groans, unbuttoning her shirt even more to get more airflow, though I couldn’t care less. I’m only gazing at the way the chains on her neck rest against her skin.
“Yeah, it certainly is,” I mumble, leaning my back against the glass railing.
Paige looks at me with something I can’t recognise, her expression softening as she’s taking steps towards me. “Fuck, that accent,” she murmurs, her hands easily finding their way to my waist again.
“What do you mean?” I laugh.
She shrugs. “I dunno, I just love hearing you talk.”
I chuckle, bringing my hand to her chest and playing with the chain there, number 5 dangling off it. Paige grins too, continuing.
“And the things you say too.”
I scoff, displeased. “Like what?”
“I dunno! British things!”
“British things??” I ask, laughing so hard my stomach begins to hurt, my fingers still fiddling the number 5.
“Like… Taking the piss!” She laughs, leaning closer. I bend forward too, my face scrunching as pearls of giggles spill from my mouth.
“Oh my God, you’re so stupid,” I murmur in a blur of joy, my hand snaking behind her head. In the haze of the alcohol and the giggles and the newfound feelings, before I can think it through, I’m pulling her down by the chain and her head, leaning closer and kissing her.
It’s heaven. Every nerve in my body is on fire. The blonde’s lips open for me, slowly but sensually sliding against mine. My legs feel weak, and my nails dig into the skin of her neck, a whimper leaving my mouth but she swallows it, groaning in response. Her hands squeeze my waist before moving to my face, landing on my jaw to keep me as close as possible - like she might die if I pull away.
I’m pressed closer to the glass behind my back as the kiss grows hungrier. Paige’s mouth opens further, her tongue darting out to slide against my lower lip, begging for entry with a small whine slipping from the blonde’s mouth. It’s like everything pent up was finally releasing, something I didn’t even know was there, bubbling right underneath the surface. My tongue meets Paige’s, both of us melting into the kiss. I feel like putty in her hands, like she could mold me whichever way possible. This is the best kiss I’ve ever experienced, I know that for sure. Jasper always kissed in such a stiff, forceful way. Right. Jasper.
It takes me back to the moment, as if for a sliver of a second I can think clearly. What the fuck am I doing. This isn’t me. I haven’t thought this through at all. I’m leading Paige on.
Abruptly I pull back for air, the taller girl already dragging me back into another kiss needily. But I push Paige back by her chest, stopping her. We’re both breathing heavily, staring at each other. What the fuck am I doing.
“I have to go, I’m sorry,” I mumble, shoving her off me as gently as I can, saying quick goodbyes to Lala and Arike before practically running down the stairs and throwing myself into a cab, leaving Paige upstairs as if nothing happened. The only proof of the night’s events merely the way my lips still burn and tingle, and my racing heart and swirling mind trying to make sense of everything.
-
taglist:@wbbgetsmewetter @thaatdigitaldiary @pb524830 @bueckersfive @lupinqs @sierrale8ne @d3arapril @lovegalor333 @avvwritesstufff @rosemariiaa @bueckers22 @taylynbueckers44 @unadulteratedcyclepaper @rizzlerbuckets @wosolipa @bridgetloveswomen @paiges-1vur @slut4uconnwbb @xxloveralways14 @bueckersbitch @janaelalfysblunt @omg-imtumbling @angryflowerwitch @ohbueckers
#so it goes#lilas writing#paige bueckers#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers fanfic#paige bueckers smut#wnba x oc#Spotify
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I beg for more fic of Nam-gyu (player 124) specifically yandere and smut idk it fits him
Nam-gyu/Player 124 - Yandere headcannons nsfw
Synopsis: Yandere Nam-gyu headcannons !!
A/N: this may be quite dark I'm ngl so tread with caution..
Warning: smut content, yandere themes, drugging, manipulation, noncon
NSFW:
➠ nothing sane about this man especially since he's high 90% of the time.. ➠ From the moment he saw you, he immediately claimed you as his ➠ very very touchy !! always has a hand on your thigh or around your waist blah blah blah ➠ likely laces your drink if you met at a club ➠ not to kidnap you (yet) but just to take you to his place ➠ The moment you're drugged out and all your words are slurred, he's speaking to you with a baby voice ➠ He'll say he'll drive you to his house and you can't even say no bc ur too out of it to realize what's going on ➠ does absolutely fuck you the moment he gets home ➠ groans and starts praising about how you're soo good for him and you always will be ➠ the day after you have a pounding headache and don't even remember what happened so he acts all innocent before sending you home ➠ Bad idea letting him drive you home because now he knows where you live ➠ he'll start driving by your place a lot more often and you find yourself bumping into him constantly ➠ The moment you become good enough friends and invite him over to your house- his behavior escalates ➠ sneakily places cameras in your bathroom so, when he gets home, he'll have something to jerk off to that night ➠ if he's feeling bold enough (high enough), he'll steal your underwear ➠ He does take his time with you at first and do his freaky shit in private but, after seeing a guy make a move on you, he drops the act ➠ he just stalks you to a quiet place after you finish work and then knocks you out ➠ Ties you up to his bed and sits there till you wake up with a smirk ➠ Gets straight to the point and admits he just wants you for himself ➠ probably gets turned on by your fear and jerks off in front of you as you cry ➠ fucks you every single day it's insane the stamina this man has ➠ sometimes he does panic though when he's not high and realizes that he's literally kidnapped a girl and made her life a living nightmare ➠ his response is to just to get more high ➠ if you ever tried to escape, he'd highkey get so nervous when he didn't see you tied to his bed ➠ the fear was presented with anger so, when he found you, he was VERY rough ➠ made a decision to try get you pregnant so you wouldn't leave because he knew you'd be too afraid to raise a child alone ➠ developed a breeding kink because of that ➠ He does have a choking too i feel like that's worth mentioning !! ➠ Overall, he's high as fuck all the time so he never plays nice ➠ Do expect to be trapped with him forever and ever..
"Fucking cunt. Did you really try to leave me?" he spoke with a hand around your throat as he pinned you to the wall. He was not happy at your attempt to leave him here. He needed you to stay. He wasn't in love, no - he knew that. Yet he was absolutely obsessed with the way you smelled and tasted. That's why he couldn't let you go and also why he had to punish you for trying. "I guess i'll have to teach you a lesson and breed your fucking pussy,"
#squid game#squid game 2#squid game x reader#squid game season 2#xaeinfinity#squid game s2#squid game smut#nam gyu#player 124
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okay this is the first time ever requesting anything EVER! But I love ur writing so I had to. I’m think a three way between the reader, James and Dave. But it’s like they’re fighting over who’s doing it right? And the reader is kinda innocent and has no experience. And they end up fucking her, taking turns like a competition bc they both in love w her? And, idk, maybe they met her bc she works for a catering business so they both know her? Idk if that makes sense lmaoo. Obviously only if ur comfy w it, but I beg!!!!
A/n: I will never not be mad that my computer glitched AFTER I FINISHED THIS and none of it saved so I had to start from scratch all over again 🥹 I WAS LITERALLY ADDING THE TAGS kill me 😩
Two days later and I’m still mad IT WAS PERFECT I genuinely think I peaked with that one 😫
Warnings: smut, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), slight breeding kink, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!
“What-what do you want, Dave?” You asked, struggling to bite back moans as James curled his fingers at just the right angle.
Dave could picture you now, doing everything you could to get off on your fingers without him there to help you. “I was just checking in, see how you were doing in the new place.” He said, twirling the phone cord in his fingers. “Didn’t realize how needy you were, want me to come over?”
“What’s he saying?” James asked, barely pulling away from you, his hot breath fanning over your cunt. His fingers didn’t stop, still thrusting into your tight hole to prep you for him.
Dave heard James over the receiver, anger already boiling in him. “Who’s that?” He asked, struggling to hold back to venom in his voice. “Are you with someone?”
James took the phone from you and hung up on Dave, going back between your trembling thighs. "Don't think about him, just think about me." He said, flicking your clit with his tongue. "Let me show you what you've been missing with Dave."
You wanted to get him to stop, you knew you should've, but you couldn't. His tongue, his fingers, he felt so good. Your head fell back and you reached down to him, fingers lacing through his hair and pulling him closer.
You’d just moved to L.A. not long after your tour with Metallica. They weren’t the first band you’d gone with for catering and such, organizing dinners whatever. First you went out with Megadeth where you met their lead singer, Dave Mustaine.
He seemed to have a thing for you, you didn’t catch on right away but he didn’t make an attempt to hide it.
Dave was great and helped you move into your apartment, it wasn’t far from his place which was why you gave him a key. Now you were regretting that decision.
Your moans filled the room, echoing off the walls. Still, you heard the keys jingling in the door, followed by Dave storming over.
He stormed into the room, swinging it open and stopping dead in his tracks at the sight. James between your legs with a firm hold on your hips as he thrust in and out of you at a brutal pace.
“What the fuck.” Dave hissed, pulling his shirt off over his head and making his way over to you. By the time he got to the bed he was just as naked as you and James.
Dave reached over for your head, turning you to him as he stroked his semi hard dick. He lined himself up with your bruised lips but James pushed him away before he could really do anything.
"What the fuck are you doing?" He demanded, unable to take most of his attention off of you wrapped around him. "She-she's never done this before, Dave, you can't just-just choke her."
Dave stared at James who was abusing your hole right now with his thrusts that lacked any rhythm. He was so close, he tried to push it off but he couldn't help the high that he was so close to.
Dave rolled his eyes and looked back to you, he knew, as much as he didn't want to, that his former bandmate was right. Your lips parted, moans left you, but you could barely handle this, let alone any more.
He sat down on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipped under his weight. Dave brushed your hair out of your face and cupped your cheek in his hand so you could look at him. He smiled down at you so warmly it distracted you for a moment from James brutal thrusts. "You're doing so good, darling." He purred. "You look so pretty like this."
"So fucking breedable." James grunted, his hand pressing down on your stomach where a bulge had formed from him. A soft gasp left you, Dave's eyes shot up to James, glaring daggers into him.
With a few more thrusts James came, painting your walls with his cum. He pulled out of you, letting his cum drip down your ass as he laid down beside you.
James wrapped an arm around you and pulled you to his side, letting you rest your head on his arm.
Dave scoffed. "Couldn't even make her cum."
James shot him a look. "I made her cum."
"Not with your dick, you didn't." James rolled his eyes at Dave's words. "You fuck like a bitch in heat."
"At least I fucked her." Dave had to stop himself from punching the blond.
He moved to kneel between your legs, looking over you a moment and running his hands along your sides with a featherlight touch. "Not good enough, obviously." He muttered. He leaned down, kissing your cheek and jaw, nipping at your earlobe. “Sweet thing needs it soft and slow.”
Your breath hitched in your throat as you felt Dave’s cock push between your wet folds, bumping your clit. Dave let out a low groan as he pushed into you, feeling your walls around him squeezing so deliciously.
Dave paused to let you adjust even though there wasn’t much difference between him and James, as much as he hated to admit it.
Dave started rolling his hips, watching your reactions closely until his dick was angled just right inside you. You squeaked, eyes shutting tight.
Your legs wrapped around him, pulling him impossibly closer to you. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” Dave asked, giving your hip a gentle squeeze. “You look so pretty like this, taking me so good.” He cooed, smiling warmly down at you.
Not wanting to lay there uselessly James traced shapes on your stomach, hand moving lower until his rough, calloused fingers found your clit, rubbing it in pace with Dave’s thrusts.
His attention was on you the whole time, James hated that he wasn’t the one making you feel this good. He hated that it was Dave, of all people it had to be Dave. He made you cum on his fingers and he’d be damned if he couldn’t do it again.
Dave kept his rhythm, rubbing your thighs and sides, trying to ignore James’s fingers bumping his groin every few thrusts.
Your mind was a muddled mess, eyes fluttering in pleasure. You couldn’t focus on anything but the way they were making you feel, the way the veins on Dave’s dick dragged on your gummy walls, the bulge that came with him fucking you so deep. James’s fingers rubbing you smoothly, jolts of electricity shooting through you.
“That’s it, darling, just relax.” Dave purred, letting you come undone from every little sensation. You head fell back, back arching off the mattress as you came on Dave, walls fluttering around him and he followed suit not long after, filling you to the brim with his seed.
A low groan left him, his hips jerking a last time before he pulled out and laid down on the other side of you.
You shifted closer to James, the two mens cum mixed together with your own juices as they spilled out of you.
“Are you kidding me?” Dave demanded. “After that, you go to him?”
“Dave.” James said, rubbing your side and squeezing your waist. “Look at her.” He rolled you onto your back, letting Dave see the glazed over look in your eyes, your lips parted slightly with heavy breaths.
Dave couldn’t exactly be that mad at you now, not when you were so out of it. “Fucked dumb, huh?” He cooed, kissing your temple. “Just sleep now… I’ll kick James out later.”
The blond rolled his eyes and pulled you closer to him, taking you for himself while he could.
#metallica x reader#metallica smut#metallica imagines#metallica rp#metallica fanfiction#80s metal#metallica#metal#megadeth rp#megadeth x reader#megadeth smut#megadeth imagines#megadeth fanfiction#megadeath#megadeth#james hetfield x you#james hetfield smut#james hetfield x reader#james hetfield fanfiction#james hetfield#dave mustaine x you#dave mustaine x reader#dave mustaine smut#dave mustaine imagines#dave mustaine rp#dave mustaine fanfiction#dave mustaine
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GOING INSANEEEE GOING INSANE. i need 2 backtrack to the light absorption. i MUST. bc u have sated viktor not understanding why jayce is tripping over his own feet, pulling open drawers nd shit obviously looking for candles, muttering to himself. i think that-- part of this. should remain in human form and that light sources react to his emotions!! i just think it would be soooo sexy. we must keep that
the blanket......it'd be so funny if viktor's species have this mating ritual that is like. A specific amount of gifts equates to a potential partner trying to court you. a few gifts indicates friendship/alliance but once a certain maximum is reached it's like. Final. the XYZ month mating ritual has started. also the realization of cold is SO sexy of you im so serious....i can imagine human viktor realizing he has a lung capacity now and--god, he has to BREATHE. he needs air. so it's him huffing puffing struggling like he's run a marathon till it steadies and he figures out how to breathe. [ofc jayce can sleep through a hurricane so he doesn't realize viktor is very much trying not to die in his newly acquired human form] the thing abt viktor not knowing how to use his hands or limbs or anything is so cute rly bc he is like a baby doe and so gangly just rolling over the floor and burrito-ing himself. also adapting to his environment bc it is Dark and he cant see Shit but can only hear Jayce's slight snoring and the gentle barely-there thrum of the fridge and other electronics, the draft of the wind outside, and anything else his human ears pick up on.
its the way jayce CANNOT catch a break. his stubble has turned into a beard. bags under his eyes. cant remember the last time he had a proper shower instead of a quick baby towel wipe-down. he wakes up,, expecting today is the day he can finally shave and wash his hair and enjoy the warm stream of water but no. no bc life hates him. and there's a naked man on his floor blinking up at him wrapped in a blanket he gave the alien he was accomodating. gorgeous, yes. unknown? also yes. he doesn't even scream at this point. they just share eye contact and jayce has this little mental breakdown laugh bc why not? life's got it absolutely against him. he is almost-yelling at the man 'what are you doing here' and 'how did you get in' and 'oh my god are you--there is an ALIEN in this house you need to LEAVE' only for his rambling to be broken by a hungry growl of viktor's stomach..who after a stretch of silence goes... 'f-o-o-d' in the exact same manner jayce had when he first tried feeding viktor in the lab and that's when everything dawns on him. and of course that is the perfect moment caitlyn of all people come barging into his apartment bc ofc she has the keys
shitshow 19.24234 spirals out of control of course bc caitlyn is going 'oh! oh. i didn't know--seriously jayce, you could have warned me at least' and jayce is waving his arms like 'it's not what you think it is--really. it--' 'dont call your hookup an it, jayce! he's right there' 'no, you don't get it. it--he--whatever is an alien!' 'what--'
and in the meantime viktor is trying to grapple his way up to his wobbly legs, not at all understanding what the humans are saying bc caitlyn nd jayce are still in a heated discussion of 'seriously your phone's been turned off for two days now your mom got worried!' 'she better be because there is an alien in my house' 'if you call him an alien one more time'
i dont know. i think caitlyn brushes past jayce and to viktor to talk to him. of course, viktor doesn't understand shit. he's hungry and confused and can only pinpoint they're displeased with one another. caitlyn is talking to him like. 'im sorry he called you that. idk whats wrong with him his mom deffo raised him better. he's being such an ass he is probably just tired.' and gradually gets confused and concerned bc viktor is just staring blankly at her before mimicking jayce from xyz days ago and going 'food' with a very butchered pronunciation [also of course rubbing over his stomach bc that's what jayce did to act out hunger when he first trying feeding him] and caitlyn goes awfully quiet. and the room is quiet. and they're all staring at each other. and jayce thinks he is about the have an aneurysm. and caitlyn very quietly goes 'jayce. why do you have an alien in your room?' and jayce tries explaining, although not very well and then caitlyn interrupts and goes 'jayce. why do you have an alien in your room. naked?'
and then hell really breaks out between them in the most sibling-like manner of disputes and in the background u just have viktor shuffling over the floor trying to walk. [i think that his existing injury/condition should also transfer to his human form. meaning he needs a cane or smth to support him in his gait] so now he's just clinging to the walls, babysteps, trying to aim for the kitchen bc he remembers jayce storing food there.
this is getting so awfully long ims o sorry but i think that by the time caitlyn and jayce finish talking, they hear a little crash coming from the kitchen and whirl around their heads to see a pot's lid on the floor and viktor eating leftover kraft mac and cheese with his hands. raises his stained fingers to them before going 'food'. caitlyn punches jayce in the shoulder nd murmurs 'give him some clothes'
@wordsofwilderness tag <3
okay so for alien!viktor do we think that jayce was messing with hexcore/tech and that’s what brought viktor into his world? or do we think hexcore is something that pops into existence alongside viktor? or it’s like kryptonite for him??? or something else??? omg my brain is quivering i am so close to abandoning all my responsibilities just to churn out a fic w this concept auuuuUgH 🗣️
me dropping my work immediately after receiving this msg:
ok. Okay. i think . jayce uncovers hexcore/tech and tinkers with it, not knowing that a certain rune sequence in combination with, i don't know, a certain component (time of the day. maybe also blood. whatever it may be. some other artifact they once retrieved, etc etc) triggers it to activate as this one-way passage that pretty much DRAGSSSS viktor to earth in jayce's lab. mayhaps he arrives in a vegetative state as we discussed and comes to be in a span of a few days while jayce studies him/tries not to freak out/refuses to sleep for the entirety of said x days
curious tall alien viktor crawling over jayce......who is sprawled on the floor bc he tripped nd fell in his shock... you know how we as humans can coo on small beings nd just wanna. Touch. that is viktor. jayce also mistakes his thrumming sound for like,, him wanting to Eat/Kill him or smth and tries not to pass out.....vik's long talon-like fingers carefully dragging down jayce's scalp to his face...to his neck......the pad gently pressing into his pulse there bc what is this curious jack-rabbit-y feel.....
anyways...ANYWAYS.. [pulling up a google docs for us]
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okay unironically I love so much that porter is like this world SUCKS its BAD here and it HURTS you why do you care abt it!!! and literally every single bad kid is like ngl we just hate ur ass it does not matter what ur philosophy is
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#not art#fhjy spoilers#its!!! gods I will Be My Ass in the tags rn. but thats so like. deliciously setting typical#like porter's desire is to transcend and his contempt for the world he's in feels. idk Real#like he plays the game bc he wants to win and be done with it. how do I word this#yknow. being a god would like. be his win state. when he gets that happening thats it his story is done he checks out#meanwhile the bad kids do actually just like playing the game lmao. like they love adventuring!#theyre so solidly Of This World. they carry the values that can only be born of it and they like having mastery over it#its a meta angle that I think is very fun specifically for d20 being in such a unique position in the zeitgeist when it first started#the rat grinders are from DnD Writ Large. porter wants to escape. but this is the bad kids' home its Their Actual Play Show#which makes it so fucking excellent to me that porter's question is somewhat of merit! its their show and it tries very hard to punish them#and they just straight up dont listen to him here lmao bc they hate him but! since the moment the academic track ended its been clear#that they save the world bc they Like Playing. With Each Others#thats what riz thinks the core of adventuring is! thats why fig stayed! and I also think thats why this hovers over elmville now and#a dead god is coming back in the school gym. porter is a shit evangelist but even if hes a good one I dont think it wouldve worked like he#wants it to. the only way he couldve escaped is if he'd not involved elmville at all. thats where the bad kids met dude#its a shitty place that fucks with them but they all come back here bc they wanna play with each others#and in that regard I think thats what the stress tokens ultimately means. Is This Game Still Fun To Play. ITS A RAGEQUIT LIMIT#Im literally running from one end to another of this conspiracy board Ive pulled out of nowhere#Ill draw after this I just wanna get this out. gods this episode has done nothing but furthering my delusion of grandeur actually#Im the hottest smartest manthing on earth Im king fucking midas over here. anyways uh! great ep!
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*watching the shorts (before actually subscribing to them)* hey, this Mace guy is kinda cute
*watching OUAW and Icebound* hey, Andy is kinda cute
*watching EOM* hey, Derek is kinda cute
#i have realized that watching loa is a dangerous game#why are they all so attractive. this is very mean of them#/lh of course#no but seriously tho. Derek without glasses is doing something to me#and idk how to feel about it#not that he’s ugly with glasses bc he’s not#but I’m kinda bad with faces I realize. and so if someone changes something about their face I have to like.#stare at them weirdly to be like ‘oh yeah I know you’#which is why i didn’t fully recognize how attractive Derek was until I started eom yknow?#not beardless Derek tho. beardless Derek is cursed. (/lh but not really)#legends of avantris#I’ll shut up now before the grave I’m digging gets deeper
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the kids released a new album
#ts4#simblr#ts4 edit#ts4 render#sims 4#myedits#AUverse#dhestyn#kelly#ok i actually have things to say about this#FIRST OF ALL this is not what i intended to make when i sat down & started working on the bandAU#i had this big elaborate thing planned & then i realized... i didn't wanna do it. at least. not right now lol#idk why i think everything i make needs to be so elaborate & involved bc it doesn't?? like where did i get that idea from?#i can just make something small & silly sometimes yk#n e way. this is like. one of the kids' albums i guess? my thought is that dhes wrote it/was in charge of it#that's why he's on the cover.#kel writes most of their albums (w help from the others ofc) but dhes really wanted to try writing one & this is what came of it#most of the titles don't actually mean anything. they're just like. random words i thought dhes would use lol#but the first 3 are references to the canonverse#also i originally wanted to have dhes shirtless bc 1. symbolism of like vulnerability?#but also 2. i thought the lighting would look pretty against his skin#BUT he has a death note tattoo right there between his shoulder blades & i just.......... could not take him seriously like that so#he had to keep his clothes on
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as an apology for being gone for a month, have a uquiz i spent a week making! pls feel free to reblog with which character you got, i worked way too hard on this silly little thing. there are eight different characters you can get that are varying levels of unknown, with comic recommendations for each character <3
#necrotic nuisance#batfamily#uquiz#batfamily uquiz#reblog for sample size#some of these characters are my fave but some are not#so I apologize if I didn't do them right I tried my best I swear#I can promise i've read all the comics recommended for each character tho!#so this was based on. something idk#I have no explanation for why I vanished for a month. it felt longer. but it also was a short month#it took time getting settled in and figuring out a routine with a baby#also answering those rlly long asks started draining me I got daunted kjjhgjkhjg#I love them tho! I will get to them#but expect them to be answered veryyy slowly now#I tried to post like 5-10 a day#and with my current life rn that is absolutely not feasible#Christmas break is coming up and my brother in law has two weeks off so! I should have spare time over the holidays to get back into it#also idk why but i've been fighting with writing#it's not even writer's block it's like I can't write well#idk what happened.#i think i'll go back to finish up the whump prompts bc it'll let me write without pressure#so expect those to come out!#i am proud of this quiz tho pls take it.#it took me so long.#I will not say which characters are in it bc I don't wish to clog tags#and I want it to be a surprise#of the ppl i've made take it so far tho I will say the breakdown of the most popular result is fascinating to me
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pretty & cute witch men
#witch hat tag#orufrey#i'm not drawing as much or as well as i'd like to be doing. i'm trying to get through a comic i've been really wanting to do#but i'm just finding it so hard. disheartening. btw the 2nd one relates to some official art of qif wearing a dress like the girls#and the 4th one relates to how i've been drawing EXTREMELY SMALL for years. idk how to explain it but i always clicked 'fit to screen'#and so all my art EVER has looked bad when you zoom in bc it's already like size 1 zoomed in to the MAX pfhgguguhfpfhGHAHHHHH#i was so confused allll this time why brushes always look different for me than what they're supposed to#'wow this brush is so jaggedy..really rather jaggedy...calling it the Jagged Cai Special..bringing it out for those jaggedy moments..#really quite jaggedy i must say...' and it's literally not jaggedy#but now i have to get used to how all those brushes that i'd gotten used to indeed look how they're supposed to finally. Alarming#I have simply been working out absolutely everything by myself for years and that's why my technical progress is slow#ppl say my progress is fast and i certainly have improved much since i began doing all this but#like..it took me a year and half to start using a program where i could Colour In The Lines aka the..whatever it's called. whatever..#just on my lonely confused solemn journey to express gay love better than yesterday.. -_- *picks up my pack n continues through the snow*#btw thank you sm for people's kind words enjoying my narumitsu art & fic over the christmas & new year period <3
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THE USOS REUNITE WWE SMACKDOWN (OCTOBER 25, 2024)
#no useful tags just me bitching lmao#i am SO unmoved#im praying theres more to all this than them just speedrunning this reunion just so certain things can line up in time for ple shows#and so wrestling fans with less than one braincell can get the instant gratification of their favwit tag team together again 🥺#bc oh bite me lolllll#so much of this ~cinema~ is starting to feel rushed and im just hoping theres turns or angles or REASONS for it#but thats asking me to trust wrestling with carrying storylines fully and i do NOT#the things i wanted most from this story were jey getting proper acknowledgement/vindication and apology for his abuse#and explanation for why the family treats solo as they do (and then expect him to be a well adjusted adult lmao)#jey has NO reason to forgive them yet like did they buy him hallmark cards behind the scenes?#and theyve done much worse to him for much longer the new bloodline#you dont get to brag about this being the greatest slowburn long term cinema storytelling and then just....#im HOPING so bad its not just as simple as it looks i am#they keep swearing theres so many more 'innings' to this so idk prove me wrong please literally do#but that still wont make me moved by ✨og bloodline reunion✨#bc what yall mean yall are still the heels in my eyes like why do you have so many family members yall left on the side of the road#while talking about family above all and dont divide family lmao#and i get ~twin bond~ but LORD#actually that twin bond excuse is evil too#solo go bring in jeremiah since hes technically part of wwe canon too and beat their asses together actually lmao#i aint forgot jey saying something like having brothers is great but how being a twin is just different/special#like yeah sure but can you not make your other siblings sound like secondhand brothers or whatever shdhfhjf#ok im done. for now. for this post. maybe.#venting about my interests is fun for me ok#its how i process the information given to me and understand it#and also i like to bitch
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oh yea.. its all coming together
#now i just have to code the stupid thing#idk why my brain is procrastinating thatpart bc once i get started its pretty smooth from there. i just Dont Wanna#i mean i guess i could make the graphics before actually coding it but i should probably do the code first#i need extra time to make sure everything is laid out the way i want it before i start decorating ugh#i know theres a way to like hide and show an element without redirecting to another page so it doesnt have to reload all the time#but i cant remember how to do it..... i wanna use that for my journal entries so i dont have to manually update the entries section#each time i post a new journal entry. either that or i can have smth that lets me change the content without opening the html#all pages should link back to the homepage cuz i wanna keep the nav in one place..#cursor should have a neutral and hover sprite which should be easy.. and i was thinking of using dither me this for images#to give it an old win98 effect + the vhs overlay#yapping#diary#wip#oh shit and i need to make smth to redirect to the oc hub
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college … wasted on the youth (me)
#didnt help that 2/4 yrs was covid telezoom but man.. MANNN#forgetting how impossible it is to pursue rhe degree plan u actually want (advising hell) i feel like . theres just#so many diff things i want to learn now Knowing that im more solidified in my interests and who i am and what i would be interested in doing#and like.😭RGAAAAAQH TEARING MYHAIR OUTTT every other week i have a night where im sititng there like damn i couldve been sm1 completely dif#dgmw i still rly enjoy some of the upper div classes i Did take but what if i took x and liked it more or minored in y and it led me to z#bc i do feel rly set in where i am rn which . i DO ! like it but im never gna be in that environment where u have the flexibility to explore#ykwim . i wish i had taken physics and calc srsly . i always thought i hated that shit but i like it. i like it quite a lot actually😟#or more geology .. urrghh.. sprinkle in sme extra art history . no bc thats what actu pissed me off ab school#i rmbr wanting to dual major and they straight up told me no i cant . but then i was like maybe an arts major bio minor when i wanted to do#science illustration but sry we dont offer bio minor . ok bio major arh or studio art minor . no sry not enough open spots we rly only#reserve it for when we have extra openings post admission❤️#and then even late into sophomore year u would still be last in registration so all the cool classes would be closed#and then bc of covid half that shit was cancelled bc they couldnt transfer labs online (rip comparative vertebrate anatomy)#and then by senior yr an additional collection of classes were unavailable bc u dont have the prereqs bc the prereqs were cancelled during#covid and u dont have enough semesters left to actually take it . like it was gen such an awful experience so ik why i couldnt ever do what#i wanted but .😭 AND LIKE the classes i DID enjoy like genomics or molecular genetics were closed by registration and i had to email and beg#for access . thts crazy .literally crazy .#anyways . i think i want 2 start reading textbooks bc i think thats the closest ill get LMAOO#i remember seeing my coworker read a textbook for fun one time and idk why i just didnt understand why bc it seemed so dry but i Get it now#like yeah .. u knew what was up ..#sad too that like . i could theoretically audit a course but i Work..during the day .. so sad . so sad#guys wht if i just said yes to grad school (<the devil talking.dont agree)
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so has anyone figured out WHY there is the Need To Share our Artworks™ or is it just the vibes and our Soul apparently
#ive been running on “two cakes. u aren't BOTHERING people by putting art on their feed they can scroll past it/if they dont they get ”cake“”#and we love “cake”#“cake” is picture on the internet in this case#like okay the contracts and transaction format is a me problem!! i need to get rid of the “utilitarian brain worms” bc they're boring#this is supposed to be a hobby and the “get a good grade in hobby” wolf in the brain is just crying bc that's how they understand the world#the “get a good grade in x” wolf has valid pain but needs to stop controlling my life because they don't need to earn “enough value to live”#ect ect ect#and the life of minmaxxed utility is a life of trying to appeal to a “correct” that doesn't exist yaddi yadda = boring#i love you wolf. also shut up. affectionate. concerned. you get it#ok so we remove tangible purpose from act of experience art because THAT'S not “the point”#because “the point” is the joy killer eccetera ecc#but then what? “here check out this labor of love. i drew this fucker 15 times. no there's no story* there it's just a guy”#*story in this case being an emotional engagement/a situation/a context in which to ponder/other#so it's just a Draw. no further analysis. what do others Get from that?#i know i deeply enjoy art because im a fan of the process of People Making Stuff. i love when there was nothing but now there's something!!!#THAT'S what's it all about!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!! right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#so it stands to reason that creation is purpose enough?? to be experienced???? to be known????????#idk!!#this is a nothing burger of a thought people have always liked picture on the internet stfu maiora there doesn't need to be a reason#this is just the brainworms talking!!! because god forbid “something not have a purpose”??? blegh!!!!!!!!#sounds like unhealthy rationalizing instead of letting things be out of The Fear™!!sounds like depraving urself from joy bc of BRAINWORMS!!!#so like!!!!! picture on the internet doesn't NEED inherent value. creation is enough!! (plus there's the Attachment to Character. also.)#but then why are YOU *points at you* here? gen q!!#i made an image you like and now you are reading my word babble in some tags!!! what's THAT all about???????????#it's INTERESTING!! do you see what im trying to get at??#is it empathy??? person made something other saw something other made- other2other connection???? intrigue????????#.......all this is probably explained in some book or yt essay somewhere. oh well.#in the meantime thank you for your time! we can pretend we were stuck in an elevator together and then i started rambling#i hope you have a great rest of your day thanks for stopping by!! <3#maiora garrulates
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once i get back into the groove of things i’m gonna pick up some hobbies 🙏🏼
#legit need to get back into writing but sighhhhhhhh idk how#i also wanna learn art!!!!! i even started a photo refs board on pinterest/am gonna make an art refs board too#i’ve just been seeing so much amazing art lately and am SO inspired#momoshouu changed my life w goth!suguru & phorigami changed my life w amano style!suguru… like WHEW#the goth!suguru & yoshitaka amano-inspired art of suguru & also kale’s suguru & user owwllly & wacuoms suguru is so inspiring#makes me LEGIT want to learn art so i can draw sugu & all my fav characters how my brain sees them#i should stay consistent and actually learn the basics though omg 😭#if anyone has any tips they’d be v welcome <333 both for writing AND art tbh 😭#also need to start hitting the gym/daily walks omg it’s so hot here now but i realized i need the sun 😭 vitamin D here i come :3#FIRST AND FOREMOST I NEED TO RB EVERYTHING I’VE BEEN TAGGED IN/I’VE READ!!!!!#i read all the fics idk why my brain won’t let me write the tags 😭 my brain has gotten too tired lately same w my hands KDJDJDJDJD#but :| i need to do it actually and not put it off bc the writing is truly AMAZING and ASTOUNDING#i just want my tags to express how much i enjoyed everything too 😭#but anyways :3 JIN IS COMING BACK IN A WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK#i wonder how festa is gonna look like :o#but everyone who gets to meet and hug jin… That Should Have Been Me#personal
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help me i've gotten so deep into the steddie rabbit hole i haven't gotten this stuck on something since destiel
this really isn't good for my health
THESE ARE THE FICS THAT I SUBSCRIBED TO / LIKED READING (I'VE BASICALLY READ 1/5 WORTH OF STEDDIE FICS COMPARED TO DESTIEL FICS - I GOT INTO DESTIEL 4 YRS AGO, I ONLY STARTED READING STEDDIE FICS SOME TIME LAST MONTH WTF)
tbf, i have taken breaks from destiel to read other fandoms/fics so, ig the timing works out? if you think about it?
#steddie#destiel#fics#ao3#also if anyone comes across this post i can rec you some of my absolute favs#these stats for my fics don't even include the ones i finished but didn't enjoy all that much#or the ones i abandoned halfway through even though it was like 100k words#i really dont care if i've spent hours reading it#i literally just leave if i get slightly annoyed by the writing#i'm not kidding#it's a problem#but also not really?#i'm just complaining for the sake of it#also i never got into stranger things fics for some reason even though i watched all of the show#idk why#i think it's bc i watched the show w/ my dad? so i felt weird to read fics about it?#like i considered it a family show for some reason#and for some reason reading fics for that was off limits??#idk#i also i'm getting scared that i won't ever be interested in my other fandoms again bc of how much i am invested in steddie stuff#this was exactly like destiel though#i just gotta get it out of my system#i have no idea why i'm so scared of losing interest in my other fandoms#also if anyone is wondering where these stats are coming from i made a spreadsheet of all the works i like#it's basically a replica of my subscriptions list because when i started ao3 i acted like the subscribe button functioned like bookmarks an#now i cant go back#so instead of transferring everything i just took the time to make a spreadsheet and basically code the functions myself#which arguably took more time to do than if i transferred everything#i would share the list but i'm sort of embarrassed of the stuff that's on there#if anyone is curious i have 676 fics stored on it
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she's beauty she's grace she's Miss Eevee Cosplay 3.0
#personal#pls don't ask me why i'm up at 2am i don't wanna talk about it#anyway i think she's mostly done maybe#i did some more work on the bangs on the wig after i took these pictures so they look better#and i might try to find some flowery earrings when i go to the store for some other stuff tomorrow#but all the major things are done. i think.#honestly i'm all over the place rn so i could be forgetting something#i keep bouncing back and forth between the one million things i have to do (con and not con-related)#anyway i usually try to do a different cosplay every day of con but idk i think i'll just wear flower eevee both saturday and sunday#bc i've put so much work into it and tbh i don't think i can handle trying to get another cosplay ready rn#the only exception would be maybe doing eevee 1.0 or 2.0 bc have everything except the wigs for those ready bc of eevee 3.0#totoro is friday bc my friends and i are doing a ghibli group!!#i wish i had a different ghibli cosplay just bc i've done totoro so much but i do love totoro and she's easy and comfy so that'll be nice#sorry shutting up now i need to go to bed i have WORK TOMORROW#cries#i should start taking off the whole week of convention lol#(no i shouldn't i should just get back in the habit of getting my cosplays done early and not con crunching -.-)
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