#idk why i said it like that. that was weird of me

[sunny-knight]

i hate him so much hes so ugly he looks so stupid/aff/pos/p/i’m gonna cry (his design is actually so pretty hes so pretty hes so pretty hes so)

GAMERS YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS. ITS TIME TO THEORIZE.

WHATS GONNA HAPPEN TOMORROW????

ALR. i think. This is gonna be the last update of this chapter, and I don’t think we’re gonna see Sans and Alphys again (in this chapter) I think we left em off on a pretty good note……….

…..well okay maybe not positive but- GOOD WRITING WISE!

I alsoooo think this update will give Wingdings some much needed HIM time. We haven’t seen how he is alone, we just know that he’s pretty monotone and straight forward/to the point. (with hints of being A HUGE DORK ofc)

He says “ok lets try this one last time…” TRY WHAT??? I ASSUME it involves the tape that they found… but hhooowww??

IDK maybe “try one last time” to record his entry on the matter, cause he doesnt know how to phrase his own thoughts cause the thing on the tape was so WEIRD??

Mayhaps he was just unnerved by it cause he KNOWS he never recorded such a thing + WHY IS A TAPE WITH HIS VOICE IN A COMPARTMENT THAT SHOULDN’T EXIST?????

What if its just Gaster SCREAMING at him 😭😭😭 like “YOURE AN IDIOT, A GODAMN IDIOT. STOP IT, STOP EVERYTHING YOURE DOING-“

I feel like the whole thing is gonna turn out a lot simpler than im theorizing it to be-

ok and I also wonder what Sans is gonna do about knowing he’s being lied to, if anything- but thats later chapters concerns

And just as a finale, let me go FULL matpat and guess whats going on in this very zoomed in and vague screenshot.

“In its entirety bef- any conclusions”

right off the bat im just gonna assume hes saying “before (making/drawing) any conclusions” cause that just makes sense

clearly hes plotting something. gotta…do something before reaching any conclusions. Right away i assume hed be reaching conclusions about the tape.

I reread the comic again earlier today and when Wingdings was questioning why the compartment wasn’t on the blueprints, he said something like “or could it be that…” and cutting himself off. and that got me THINKING

if we were to go off the assumption that Gaster caused the power outage/is responsible for the tape and small crevice n all that (i adamantly believe this, watch me be completely right and prove all you nay sayers wrong) Then he could have time traveled, added that crevice to the blueprints, then removed it later?? seems convoluted but THATS NOT THE POINT, THE POINT IS TIME TRAVEL

the conclusion Wingdings is reaching but hesitant to is TIME TRAVEL cause he NEVER made that tape😭😭

ok thts all i got.

CONCLUSION: Wingdings is stupid and i hate him. Thats why I devote a significant amount of my energy and personal time into thinking, talking, drawing, and writing about him.

I just remembered...

NEW PAGES TOMORROW

[thephantomsdream]

so I've been reading real published romance books and they cannot fill the void that ao3 and company do fill, but they did give me an idea. ok, lmfao, hear me out. (I've had this in my drafts for way too long, i decided to release it because why tf not)

content: alien!141, soulmates!141, abduction, intergalactic human trafficking, space shit; very vague idea of anything ever; probably made up alien names; writer is at work while dealing with annoying costumers so it's rushed and dumb.

imagine:

Good ol' you, in your house, unaware that in the deep, vast universe, trafficking also existed. Not long ago, a reptilian race found out about our warm bodies, interesting features and intelligent yet primitive brains, and started to abduct and sell men and women to rich buyers. It was good business, especially considering our side of the universe wasn't even aware of extraterrestrial life, so they couldn't even guess where they disappeared! The treaty and all intergalactic laws were vague about us. "Let them be" meaning "Let them fuckers figure their shit out, lol idk".

Well, as you can understand, the Sheh'deauz (lmfao stay with me) decided to in fact not let us be. So back to lovely you, yeah?

Home alone, playing videogames or something, when suddently you see some flashes of light out the window. It was weird considering it wasn't raining but you remained calm, as you assumed maybe a storm is approaching? Mainly, you couldn't give a shit but the moment you heard scratching and hissing outside your door, you panicked. Long story short, your house slowly started filling with an invisible gas that just made you pass out, but you did see your door opening, same weird blue-white light emanating from under it as it did, and a scaly leg entering your home as you fell on the floor.

You figured, as the genius that you were, that you were, in fact, not dreaming as you spent many hours (days? felt like days) in a cage. Very oddly technologically advanced. In another strike of genius, and of course, after seeing your kidnappers, you figured it was a spaceship and you were in some deep sci-fi shit. (maybe after laughing and asking them where are the hidden cameras. i would...)

After throwing tantrums and having the ugly multi-colored creatures mock you and hiss at you, you kinda gave up and sat by the very human bed you've been given and allowed time to pass. You were given food every so often, a toilet nearby, water at your disposal. But you feared for your life.

Well, let me tell you something. You have the luckiest misfortune of all, really. Or maybe, just maybe, things are meant to be this way. Maybe it was all meant to happen like this. Allow me to explain.

In another corner of the universe, four of the greatest warriors of the Intergalactic Army frowned at a holographic screen. A female alien, older, still beautiful, ethereal looking, skin creamy white with some lavender edges and striking blue eyes was frowning back.

"You're fucking kidding me." Their captain said (in a different language than ours but your writer here is multi-lingual, don't worry), getting closer to the screen. She just nodded, rubbing her forehead.

"Where is that again?" Asked another.

"So like—" a third one, this one with a distinct accent compared to the others, tilted his head incredulously. "They're our cousins genetically?"

"You can say so." She groaned. "The Council decided to not touch that part of the galaxy. They are being observed. Fucking hell! They were going on the right path."

"If they don't destroy their own planet before." The captain muttered, voice tired and coarse. In his many, many years lived, he's seen it happen again and again. Greed and stupidity almost whipped their race, so he's been following the Terrans close-by, as close as a mere Intergalactic Task Force Captain (stick with me lmfao) could follow.

"So what's the plan?" The tallest one asked, mask made of what others assumed was one of his most dangerous prey's skull was placed on his face.

"We give them hell." Captain commanded, Laswell nodding.

"Stay close, at the outskirts of their galaxy. We intercept any package and find their buyers."

"What do we do with our lil cousins then?"

"Eliminate any witnesses."

Shit went down really quick. You figured they were preparing for something as the guards by your cell somehow summoned some advanced looking chairs from the walls to strap themselves on and hissed at you mockingly, as they've done before. You just sat in a corner, by the bed, and wanted to cry. You were going through all stages of grief every few hours and it was getting exhausting. You were just now starting to understand how dire your situation was and how little chances you had of going home.

They turned off the main lights and a thousand scenarios crossed your mind. It was as if they were bracing for something. You frowned as you saw the guards tense as some alien hieroglyphics appeared on a holographic screen. It looked... like a countdown... You grasped the bed, trying to brace yourself for something. And good that you did because it felt as if the ship collapsed with something.

It basically shook you off to the ground, and while you'd think this was supposed to happen, you quickly realize it wasn't since the guards unstrapped themselves from the chairs and started shrieking as alarms suddently blared. After that? Seconds and it was over. Two white blasts ended them both, hitting them exactly in the middle of their ugly skulls. You did not hear any footsteps but you saw a shadow approaching your cell, so you scurried closer to your bed and now presumably magic shield that will block blasts that melt alien skulls.

The barriers from your cell unlocked, sliding to the sides and someone jumped in front of you. Someone big, dressed sleekly in black, although you could swear the edges of his frame looked transparent for a second. It was big, yet had the complexity of a human so you stayed locked in place, big scared eyes on the person pointing a big son-of-a-bitch gun at you. You heard it growl and speak something shortly, and the hairs on your whole body pricked.

World stopped for Price as he cracked another neck, just after locking eyes with the leader of this "cargo" ship. He was about to take a step forward to gently guide this person towards personal enlightenment by confessing all the information they needed, even if it would be involuntarily, when Soap spoke... well, growled just one word in their comms.

"Mate."

[agentem]

The Spirit Trial

I have been thinking about the trials. So when the Spirit Trial happened a lot of people noticed how weird it was. Why set it in the 80s when we don't associate Agatha with that time period? What was the purpose? Why did the aspect ratio not change like it does for the others?

After Jac Schaeffer said the purpose was to "punish Agatha" and they did that, I just sort of blithely accepted that answer. People kept mentioning that the aspect ratio didn't change and insisted the trail wasn't finished. Annoying suck up me was like, "Jac said..." to all these posts.

But it was werid compared to the other trials. It wasn't immersive (as seen by the aspect ratio staying the same) because Billy can't read Agatha's mind at that point. Subconsciously--and conciously because Lilia keeps talking about how much she hates witch stereotypes--he knows things that upset Jen, Lilia and Alice. The Spirit trial is like "IDK? Punish Agatha somehow?"

Alice's trial is very particular, I imagine because he can sense the Curse on her and possibly she is the easiest to read as the youngest and least powerful.

Jen's is maybe the next least targeted. Probably because he only just met them at that point. But it's about using "analog magic" which is what he spoke about before they went in, and that ends up being important to her story. I imagine he starts to really know their minds with the hallucinations they have in this trial. Although it's called out that he doesn't know what Agatha saw (and even then, I am not sure her hallucination is really her worst fear. It seems to be more related to what Jen told Billy earlier).

Lilia's trial is set at a castle, with full costumes, makeup, telling fortunes. It seems designed to remind her how cool it is to be a witch. (And she did "love being a witch." Sob.) Also interesting to think the trial was designed for Lilia when Billy's conciousness thought she was gone. Some part of him new she was alive though. That he didn't kill her or Jen. And I do like that about Billy. Even when he lashes out, he sends them to the exit. I'm not saying it was "nice" but it's a bit gentler than what Wanda did to Monica Rambeau when she expelled her from Wanda's world. (They hit fewer walls at least.)

[average-book-enjoyer]

need to start drinking more water and stretching again. i’m getting less flexible..

[lilcathsmith]

Season 7 review!

I'm not going to lie, wasn't overly keen on this season. I wasn't a fan of Booth and Brennan's dynamic, I understand that it probably would change because of the little-bitty not too serious situation of Bones being pregnant (even though Angela and Hodgins didn't change) but all of their chemistry just seemed to disappear?

I also understand that they wrote the pregnancy storyline bc Emily Deschanel was pregnant but I really didn't want them to get together this way, it really felt like they just got together because they had to. AND I had huge issues with Brennan's attitude the entire season in terms of involving Booth in ANYTHING to do with their child? Not telling him about the scans? Not telling him they were having a girl? And originally not planning on going to her christening?? It all just felt really heartless and inconsiderate (even for Bones).

All that being said... CHRISTINE ANGELA 🥺🥺 (I nearly cried when they said that) Officially the cutest Jeffersonian Baby Girl.

And another season gone waiting for the thing to happen 🥲

Episode discussions:

- The Crack in the Code: wasn't really that intrigued by Pelant, he just didn't seem that sinister. The code on the bones was cool/weird though! (My main question of this episode though was how did they manage to renovate the whole house between this and the next episode?)

- The Prisoner in the Pipe: Of course Bones would go into labour in a prison, how else did we expect it to happen? And of course they gave birth in a barn because there was no room at the inn 🙄 Idk it just felt a bit on the nose. But obviously Baby Christine was the star of the show and I love that the sign said "Welcome stapes" bc it's the smallest bone in the body 🥹

- The Bump in the Road: one thing I did like about this season was that they made Bones "struggle" with the post-partum side of things. It definitely felt like something Angela would more likely struggle with so I'm glad they gave the separation anxiety and body consciousness to Brennan. Oh and I LOVE Finn!

- The Warrior in the Wuss: I hate that Booth never thinks to talk to Parker about things, maybe it's a man/dad thing but there have been multiple occasions now where Booth's mind has gone to the worst case scenario and it's literally not even a bad thing. This episode was the same, as soon as I saw the photos cut out and the batteries taken out of the car I knew Parker was making something nice for Christine and it pained me the whole episode that Brennan and Booth thought that something dodgy was going on :(

- The Past in the Present: this episode frustrated me SO MUCH. How was Bones still allowed in the Jeffersonian even before she was an "official" suspect I was just sat there watching it like "they wouldn't be allowed to do that on CSI". Also couldn't Pelant have just changed the time stamp from the day Brennan went to visit her friend to the day before he died? AND WHY DID SHE LEAVE

Anyway, hopefully Bones and Booth get their flirty chemistry back in Season 8 (and maybe they'll get married soon?) (Can confirm they get their chemistry back, them making out in the laundry room in 8x01 👀)

(putting Sweets in here bc I love him and he was so cute in this scene 🥹)

New crime show obsession?

I've finally decided to dive into the world of Bones and I'm going to take you on the journey with me! So here goes!

☆☆☆

I've watched the pilot and am immediately into it. I'm intrigued by the focus of the show as when I'm watching CSI I find the scenes where they recontruct a victims face from the skull really cool and the people who do irl and soooo talented!

Also, the opening scene? The skull in the bag? Obsessed!

Already in love with Brennan and Booth's dynamic, feels very Finn/Russell - there's been some angst in the past that we haven't let go of - I'm excited for their back-and-forth-banter.

Straight away, I like Brennan and Riva, they're funny and cool and I hope they have as good of a relationship as this first episode has shown.

I probably won't write my thoughts on EVERY episode, maybe do mid-season and season finale summaries idk we'll see!

[fishing-lesbian-catgirl]

When someone really cool that I’ve followed for a while follows me back I feel like I have to be more normal with my posting habits for a bit because I don’t want to scare them away, as if they were a nervous horse who might run away if I move too suddenly. But eventually I realize that it’s impossible for me to be normal forever so I just go back to being weird regular annoying me and cross my fingers that they stay

[squidslugs]

okay thoughts from having played 1. exclusively the dragons (fuck them fairies) 2. only for like a few minutes each.

every dragon has two unique minigames each (to start with? theres a money collecting mechanic i dont know if that unlocks more things) and a bunch of cute little animations you can select from some of which being unique to each dragon. they all have kind of unique designs too which is cool instead of them just being appropriately recoloured for the element. they are mostly the same since its just a dragon base with a few unique elements on each one, but some of them are still really cool as ill show off later lmao. i was expecting less out of a game that was like, a mcdonalds toy in 2008.

its obviously a little designed for older computers, as some of the minigames take place in their own seperated box, which creates a fake "greyed out" effect on your desktop behind it - which is also super zoomed in, because its not designed for this aspect ratio. oops!

everything else runs pretty smoothly though.

OPINIONS ON EACH DRAGON NOW!!!

ice dragon: unfortunately he is the worst one minigame wise. im sorry ice dragon i love you really. his minigames are a memory game and a little sidescroller where you just kind of destroy random walls in a cave to get coins. not bad but once you get to the other 3 you realize poor ice dragon got the short end of the stick

design wise actually fire and ice are kind of just recolours of eachother with slightly different spike placement. earth and wind are the more unique designs trust me

fire dragon: THE BEST ONE. it was definitely that one i had as a kid and i was sooo beautiful and true for it. his minigames are a similar sidescroller to ice but you're destroying a big ass castle instead and we ALL KNOW the coolest games in the universe are when you get to play as a dragon and KILL EVERYONE. and the first of the dragons to show off why its on your desktop, since its other minigame is a little shoot the targets thing where it actually takes place on your desktop instead of in its own seperated box! the little fire dragon sits on its platform and fires at the targets from there! unfortunately ice is also the only one without a game like this, which is SO SAD. justice for mcdonalds ice dragon.

design wise exactly what i said before, since ice and fire are bordering on identical, but this guy has a lot more to offer in the games department so they unfortunately edge out the competition here

earth dragon: VERY fun. second best minigames wise, has a top-down endless runner type where you have to fly between platforms and defeat bug enemies and destroy rocks with a weird ground stomp you have. i found its mechanics kind of confusing but it was fun. and its other game (which takes place over the desktop like the fire one) has you summoning rocks to hit baseball style with their club tail, and scores you based on the accuracy of your hits. VERY cool.

this guy is definitely a bigger hitter in terms of design - still samey thanks too all the dragons being on that same base, but i think their tail (which i admittedly didnt get much of here) and extra webbing and stuff in their design is a way better hook than the previous two

wind dragon: this guy is like, the best design, but objectively loses a lot in the minigame department. their main game is another topdown one that has you flying around destroying clouds for... random coloured balls??? idk. it was really strange to control and it didnt super communicate its mechanics very well (its the only one that gives you free range of motion and a very limited breath meter). the on the desktop minigame here was equally as fun as the others though, where you get a bunch of bones thrown in the air and you have to click to make the dragon pounce on them.

the REALLY weird thing about wind dragon though? is their sound design. every dragon makes dragonlike growls... except this one. wind dragon makes like. human sounds. they laugh during the bone catching game and make WEIRD humanlike groans when hit during the flying one. its so weird. why'd they do that

designwise the best though. the bright blue and silver colours are awesome and the curled horns, beard and feathered wings are like. overload of unique traits on one guy in this game. i kinda wish they gave something to poor ice and fire because this design just RIPS by hogging all the unique traits. it slaps though so no complaining really. just take out the weird human sounds and we'll be good, wind dragon.

so uhh. review? of mcdonalds dragons? not really. i havent exactly played it super comprehensively. i do like the funny dragons though. gonna have to keep a copy of my desktop background saved for a little while

remembered a little childhood game of mine i remember being obsessed with and its on the internet archive. god bless im downloading that shit NOW

[bandtrees]

they would get divorced in one universe just to find eachother in another one

alternatively titled: sometimes you're the level-headed token flesh-head impulse-control-and-polycule-member of a stubborn, eccentric, and hearty telephone-headed drug addict, and there's cruelty in the world you deem fit to suicidally fight, and that either goes about as well as you'd expect it to, or you learn about love and the value of your life and junk along the way

[bread-is-my-life]

GUYS GUYS GUYS

IT'S AN ANNIVERSARY OF THE "SOMETHING STUPID" ANIMATIC BY @seagiri OMG GUYS LET'S GOOOOOOO!!!!!

(this animatic literally was the reason why I got into tf2 so GO WATCH IT IT'S BEAUTIFUL I PROMISE!!!)

[dootznbootz]

Odysseus was afraid the entire year on Aeaea in the Odyssey.

Content warnings: Rape, Sexual Coercion, Sexual assault, Sex Work, power dynamics, this will also be long as fuck as I talk too much. This is NOT a "Circe the Goddess Hate Post". I call her out but that's it. I tried to keep this neutral but still making a point (Let me know if I gotta put more)

Lots of lovely folks on here have written great essays on what Calypso did to Odysseus as it's soooo blatantly obvious there. It literally states how he cried every day and how he flinched from Calypso, very straightforward on how he was explicitly raped.

But I've noticed that a lot of people are always iffy about Circe's situation (understandably so, it's not so in your face.) She's usually always mentioned in the "Odysseus never cheated! He was raped!" posts but then the evidence is only ever given against Calypso, and then mentioning how you can't say no or disobey the orders of an immortal and how it was in exchange for freeing his men.

WHICH IS ALL CORRECT!!! But!!!

There ARE immortal/mortal couples who genuinely love each other. Dionysus and Ariadne, and Eros and Psyche are examples. Apollo and Hyacinthus. Psyche indeed becomes immortal eventually and in some versions, both Hyacinthus and Ariadne do too. But even while mortal themselves, their immortal lovers still remained respectful and loving towards them and definitely doted on them. There are definitely power dynamics at play here but there's some nuance.

Odysseus and Circe's relationship, however, is very different. We all know he slept with her at the very least once. And that was in exchange for his men being returned to humans. That was the only time it was explicitly stated. With Calypso, it tells you every night he was enchanted and slept beside her. It was the narrator speaking but Odysseus is the narrator now and it's his story. If you think he lied, this probably won't change your mind anyway.

But even if it was a one-time thing, (which isn't the only interpretation and I will have points that talk about others) then why did he stay a year? What was he doing?

I'm doing a deep dive into the year he spent on Aeaea based on evidence in Book 10 and then the beginning of Book 12. Step by step, and honestly I'm writing this for Tumblr, not as a thesis so I will be a bit more casual but still using sources. To me, it's very obvious that he was uncomfortable throughout the text simply based on the language that is used. But it's very subtle and not an outright statement of "He's been crying every day."

BTW, just so we're clear, this is not a "Circe is the root of all evil, etc." type of post.

This isn't meant to villainize her. She's an immortal being and in mythology that changes things. Everybody is morally gray. I genuinely think if we were to ask her feelings on it, she'd probably be like "Oh, yeah! Turned his men into pigs! Strange little man he was." I don't think she gave a flying fuck.

I just simply get pissed tf off when people think Odysseus was fine. It honestly disturbs me how often I'll go on other websites YouTube and see everyone call him a whore and a womanizer. It's sexism at its finest because 1.) "MaN AlwAyS wAnTs sEx" and 2.) women can't rape/coerce. THIS IS SIMPLY TO LOOK INTO HIS FEELINGS ABOUT IT.

This is also only for Homer's Odyssey, using different translations. If you want to discuss this, (I'd be happy to! Just be nice!) DON'T BRING UP ANY OTHER WORKS.

With all that out of the way, come yell with me 🤗

I've read multiple translations, as I know there's going to be bias depending on who's translating. And having done so, each one has basically the same situations described the same so that's nice for consistency. Also, there are some parts in the story that are vague and that we'll never have answers to.

Odysseus first simply sees the smoke from her chimney and then sends his men in, after drawing lots Eurylochus leads half of the men to check out the house. I mentioned here vaguely how the 2 immortals he sleeps with are both introduced while singing and weaving, which could be seen as an enchantment (which to me is most likely. They both possess magic and are goddesses). So I'm just gonna move past that. Just take a peek and come back or just know that enchantment was likely.

Next, I'll see people often joke on Tumblr about how

"Odysseus says that Polites is his best friend yet only mentions him once!"

I think Odysseus mentions his best friend, the one to jubilantly go in first, to show WHY he would go through with this. How much these comrades mean to him. That's his best friend, and there are approximately 20 others who are now pigs as well. Could you knowingly leave one of your best friends to live a life like that knowing you could've done something?

[...]Circe—and deep inside they heard her singing, lifting her spellbinding voice as she glided back and forth at her great immortal loom, her enchanting web a shimmering glory only goddesses can weave. Polites, captain of armies, took command, the closest, most devoted man I had: ‘Friends, there’s someone inside, plying a great loom, and how she sings—enthralling! The whole house is echoing to her song. Goddess or woman—let’s call out to her now!’ So he urged and the men called out and hailed her. She opened her gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting them all in, and in they went, all innocence.

(Fagles, Book 10)

In the Odyssey, it's never mentioned why she turns people into animals. I think they were turned into pigs because, throughout the Iliad and Odyssey, Odysseus is often associated with boars. His men are associated with him, therefore: 🐖 Piggy. From what we know, the lads were just eating her food. With how much Xenia and hospitality are a large part of the story, they probably thought they were safe. They were GUESTS. This is especially welcome after the Cyclops and the Laestrygonians. And it literally says "All innocence". They were simply naive.

Then Eurylochus runs back, so terrified that he couldn't speak at first. He then begs Odysseus to just leave the men behind. Odysseus has shown that he does TRY to save his men when it is truly not reckless to do so.

But I shot back, ‘Eurylochus, stay right here, eating, drinking, safe by the black ship. I must be off. Necessity drives me on.’

(Fagles, Book 10)

Then the famous warning from Hermes. I've seen folks bring this up when talking about this. YES, he is literally commanded by Hermes to not refuse her if he wants his men back in basically every translation. It sounds like Circe was warned as well. When? We don't know, but it sounds like Hermes didn't pick "sides" here.

Strange that he was still like, "Sleep with each other" to both, because he could've been like, "Circe, there's this guy named Odysseus. When he comes to this island, change his men back." But who knows, maybe it was Circe's idea from the beginning and Hermes went along with it. Just food for thought.

Now here’s your plan of action, step by step. The moment Circe strikes with her long thin wand, you draw your sharp sword sheathed at your hip and rush her fast as if to run her through! She’ll cower in fear and coax you to her bed— but don’t refuse the goddess’ bed, not then, not if she’s to release your friends and treat you well yourself. But have her swear the binding oath of the blessed gods she’ll never plot some new intrigue to harm you, once you lie there naked— never unman you, strip away your courage!’

(Fagles, Book 10)

But that doesn't explain why he was there for a year afterward! Nor if he himself was okay with it, which is what I'm trying to delve into as he wasn't.

Also the knife thing? She's still immortal. It was meant to startle her. Her dad is Helios. Odysseus would've been toast, literally.

Also note this exchange wasn't a "Yippee! Hermes says I'm going to get laid!".

...just approaching the halls of Circe, my heart a heaving storm at every step, paused at her doors, the nymph with lovely braids— I stood and shouted to her there. She heard my voice, she opened the gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting me in, and in I went, all anguish now …

(Fagles, Book 10)

Another translation by Ian Johnston, (they all say the same thing essentially but trying to make a point.)

I continued on to Circe’s home. As I moved on, my heart was turning over many gloomy thoughts. After I had walked up to the gateway                                                of fair-haired Circe’s house, I just stood there and gave a shout. The goddess heard my voice.                      She came out at once, opened her bright doors, and invited me inside. I entered, heart full of misgivings.

HE👏WAS👏SCARED! The tone is solemn and suspenseful. He was just told that without Hermes' help with the root, he wouldn't be able to survive and bring back his men. Circe was dangerous.

He made her swear not to harm him.

Straightaway she began to swear the oath that I required—never, she’d never do me harm—and when she’d finished, then, at last, I mounted Circe’s gorgeous bed …

(Fagles, Book 10)

Please note that she NEVER promised that to his men. His comrades did NOT have moli in their systems. He had no way of truly ensuring their safety in any way from Circe.

He then refuses to eat or speak, literally "lost in grim forebodings". If he "just got laid", then why isn't he happy? Not many men can say that a goddess CHOSE to have sex with them. He did it to get his men turned back. It was an exchange. I don't think Circe is "Evil" so maybe it slipped her mind. Or yes, she could've thought, "Hey, I got what I wanted. He's handsome enough. Homer never shuts up about how hot this guy is He hasn't brought up the pigs yet. I'll just let this play out. Maybe HE forgot. I don't have to do anything." We don't know. But Odysseus probably felt like he got deceived.

"Hey, I did my part of the deal. I slept with you. Now do yours."

She pressed me to eat. I had no taste for food. I just sat there, mind wandering, far away … lost in grim forebodings. As soon as Circe saw me, huddled, not touching my food, immersed in sorrow, she sidled near with a coaxing, winged word: ‘Odysseus, why just sit there, struck dumb, eating your heart out, not touching food or drink? Suspect me of still more treachery? Nothing to fear. Haven’t I just sworn my solemn, binding oath?’

So she asked, but I protested, ‘Circe— how could any man in his right mind endure the taste of food and drink before he’d freed his comrades-in-arms and looked them in the eyes? If you, you really want me to eat and drink, set them free, all my beloved comrades— let me feast my eyes.’ So I demanded.

(Fagles, Book 10)

He doesn't trust her despite what she had told him that he should when they sleep together. He has figured out that while she will not hurt him, his men were not a part of that oath, the men he was trying to protect in the first place.

She is then moved by how they rejoice when they see one another again. While turning people into animals for funsies isn't cool and coercion is fucked up, I think she comes to see this group as not quite friends but I think she did find them entertaining in a way.

This is very strange but I've seen some folks say that since Odysseus was pissed at Eurylochus for still not believing him about Circe is proof that "Oh he was trying to defend her!". Which??? Uh, Eurylochus was literally questioning his leadership as a whole. Calling him reckless and shit. He is captain and he's the King, he can't let that shit slide. The text literally says "Mutinous". Also if I had to sleep with someone I did not want to especially if it was to save my friends and I got called names afterward I'd get fucking pissed too.

Only Eurylochus tried to hold my shipmates back, his mutinous outburst aimed at one and all: ‘Poor fools, where are we running now? Why are we tempting fate?— why stumble blindly down to Circe’s halls? She’ll turn us all into pigs or wolves or lions made to guard that palace of hers—by force, I tell you— just as the Cyclops trapped our comrades in his lair with hotheaded Odysseus right beside them all— thanks to this man’s rashness they died too!

They stay a year. Again it's never stated that Odysseus slept with her that whole time. You could interpret that. (Honestly, I feel Circe would get bored with him? She's a goddess, she's got more important matters than mortal men. And she definitely doesn't love him.)

His men DO have to bring it up that "Odysseus has forgotten his native land." Maybe they thought they could sneak out without her knowing??? I am fucking REACHING but hold on as Telemachus did because he knew Nestor would well, be Nestor and try to coax him with "Have a meal with us! Let me tell you about how badass I used to be in my youth." But to sneak away from a goddess? Without her permission? That won't end too well. Aeolus in the beginning kicked out Odysseus when he tried to ask for another bag of wind. If she didn't want him around, she could literally boot him out. While she didn't force him to stay like Calypso did, she didn't "release" him either.

We don't know if they've been asking for a long time. Odysseus does say to Circe that they have been begging him nonstop, but he could also be saying that to try and convince her. He's good at persuasion. I think while he knew he could rely on her for food, shelter, and good advice, he still didn't feel...SAFE with her. I think he was possibly avoiding her personally.

I think HOW he asks her to leave is important to know as well.

...but I went up to that luxurious bed of Circe’s, hugged her by the knees and the goddess heard my winging supplication: ‘Circe, now make good a promise you gave me once— it’s time to help me home. My heart longs to be home, my comrades’ hearts as well. They wear me down, pleading with me whenever you’re away.’

(Fagles, Book 10)

Throughout all of Homer's works, the characters grasp another's knees when they are desperate and are literally at the other person's mercy. Priam did when begging Achilles for Hector's body back. The man who literally killed his son and was defiling his body by dragging it around. Leodes grabs Odysseus' knees to beg for his life before Ody kills him. If he saw her as a friend, and not a captor, WHY DID HE FEEL THE NEED TO BEG IN ORDER TO LEAVE?! No one, who is in a healthy relationship, has to BEG for permission to leave. Or to "Break up", if you interpret them as still sleeping together.

And even Circe acknowledges that he is there against his will!

‘Royal son of Laertes, Odysseus, old campaigner, stay on no more in my house against your will.

(Fagles, Book 10)

[...]Odysseus, man of many resources, scion of Zeus, son of Laertes, don’t stay here a moment longer against your will

(A.S. Kline, Book 10)

This is probably another reach that you can ignore but the whole "they wear me down", could be trying to appease her. "Look, you're REALLY cool, it's actually my crew that wants to leave hahahah please don't kill them"

I mentioned before how Telemachus snuck away from Nestor but that was simply out of necessity because he needed to go home now. Not rest for the night. NOW. Nestor is just everyone's grandpa. Menelaus kind of talked more but Telemachus is very straight up in "Please I have to go now" and Menelaus immediately got things ready for him. He never has to beg and clasp his knees. Telemachus was never afraid. Menelaus is a fun uncle and Helen is your cool auntie.

Back to Circe! She tells him instructions for the underworld, they were in her bedroom. But that might've been the only way to speak with her. As even Penelope is usually away from the suitors when they are in her halls, Circe may have done the same. The text never states she played hostess physically. If she was hosting in the halls during the day, why did Odysseus wait until night to talk to her? He could've just asked her while she was on her throne in front of everyone. (He did so with the Phaeacians)

Or maybe he went alone because she only swore an oath to not harm him and so he didn't want his men near if she decided she didn't want to let them go. I could be missing something here so feel free to say something. Idk if this was a pride thing on how "I don't want others to see me beg".

She has info he needs in order to go home as well. She tells him to go to the Underworld.

She gave him new fine clothes and put on pretty clothes herself but that doesn't mean they had sex. Nausicaa gave him nice clothes as well but he never slept with her.

Then he leaves. Immediately. Not even doing a headcount as he didn't realize one of his men had died. (That was negligence on his part but he wanted out) He booked it, to the UNDERWORLD BY THE WAY. Circe even had to sneak the animals he needed for the sacrifice. Odysseus even basically said "She's a goddess. She can do things mortals can't" at the end of the book. And it almost feels...Numb? Solemn? Neutral? Gives a "It is what it is" vibe.

But Circe got to the dark hull before us, tethered a ram and black ewe close by— slipping past unseen. Who can glimpse a god who wants to be invisible gliding here and there?

(Fagles, Book 10)

She’d slipped past us with ease, for who can see a god move back and forth, if she has no desire to be observed?

(Johnston, Book 10)

She's a goddess. She has magic. She can do whatever the fuck she wants.

NOW ON TO BOOK 12!!! That was long! GET A SNACK AND WATER! LUCKILY THIS'LL BE SHORTER!

In Book 11, Odysseus swears, upon all his loved ones in Ithaca, to Elpenor that he'd give him a proper burial as he's been "unwept, unburied". So in Book 12, he sails back to Aeaea to fulfill his promise.

But you know what's funny to me?

He didn't tell Circe he was there.

He didn't even go to greet Circe himself. He sent his men to go get Elpenor's body.

The biggest clue that he didn't love/trust her is that if she was his "Affair partner" then why not go see her for "one last night together"?

SHE came out herself and pulled him aside to know what happened and then gave more advice.

I dispatched some men to Circe’s halls to bring the dead Elpenor’s body. [...]

Nor did our coming back from Death escape Circe— she hurried toward us, decked in rich regalia, handmaids following close with trays of bread and meats galore and glinting ruddy wine. [...]

But Circe, taking me by the hand, drew me away from all my shipmates there and sat me down and lying beside me probed me for details

(Fagles, Book 12)

In every translation, it talks about how he sits, and she lounges/lies down. That's not sex 🙃 In some translations, it even says he tried to be with his shipmates but she pulled him away!

So we lay down and slept beside our ship’s stern cables. But Circe took me by the hand and led me away, some distance from the crew. She made me sit, while she stretched out beside me on the ground. 

(Johnston, Book 12)

Then, she gives advice about the sirens, Charybdis, Scylla, and her father's Cattle. He tries to ask if he could save all his men. She scolds him for even thinking he could try. He again books it out of there.

I think we all know it wasn't "love". But I think a lot of people think Odysseus was willing and happy with whatever this was. "Friends with Benefits", if you will. I guess you could see it that way but I will say that makes me feel itchy with the whole power dynamic and fear. I don't think folks who have that arrangement have to beg on their knees to ask if they can leave though.

I mean the entirety of Book 10 gives me the vibes of "Laughing uncomfortably because you don't want to upset the other person". To just grin and bear it.

A lot of this was just putting the text here and picking it apart step by step. What you do with this is up to you. It's rambling while banging pots and pans together.

Maybe you see him as drugged the entire year and still sleeping together, as the moli "wore off". Even then, just because her magic can't affect him, there are plenty of natural concoctions that can be created that can affect mortals.

Maybe you see the entire year as sex work in exchange for shelter and food.

Maybe he was just alongside his men the whole time under her roof and was avoiding her after the exchange. After he got asked by his men to finally leave, he would start to walk up to that room only to freeze and turn around, thinking "One more day won't hurt. Should wait until I know she's in a sympathetic mood".

I beg of you, however, PLEASE understand that there was fear and coercion throughout his entirety on Aeaea. He wasn't staying to get laid. While there is so much going on and too many things that are left vague to really know exactly what happened, it is consistent that he was scared/numb. Lots of people go through with things they don't really want to do just to appease others. There are plenty of situations of sexual trauma where one person goes through something and the other has no idea the other person isn't okay. ESPECIALLY WHEN SOMEONE CAN HARM THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT AT ANY MOMENT!

Sexual trauma is a very complicated thing and while he was scared, he definitely wasn't as traumatized by her as he was by Calypso. Calypso was a torturous hell while Circe was a year of walking on eggshells. Not comparable but I still think it should be acknowledged. It's wild because I read the Odyssey and kept thinking "Y'all are calling the sex slave a cheater? The guy who slept with a goddess to get his men back? The ultimate simp apparently doesn't love his wife??"

Things I'm adding that shouldn't affect the argument as it is not in the Odyssey but I want to mention as it's a "fun fact": Odysseus' dad was an Argonaut. Laertes probably met Circe as well, (or knew of her) with the whole purifying thing and maybe Odysseus heard his dad tell stories of her. Later myths also have Circe with the habit of turning her crushes (or their lovers) into something with Scylla and Picus.

In conclusion, Yeah, he was afraid of her. At least to an extent. And don't pull the whole "Ancient men didn't get raped". Male victims exist and deserve compassion for what was done to them and women are capable of sexual abuse. If you think otherwise, you are not a true feminist and Fuck you. I said in the beginning this'll be casual and I don't wanna write a fancy ending. You can still think Circe is neat but you have to know that this was fucked up.

If you think a lot of this is bullshit or wanna give more context or wish to yell with me but still know he wasn't alright on Aeaea, cool. If you want to point out mistakes or something I should keep in mind with interpretations then feel free to say so but give text evidence. If you try and bring up the Telegony and/or Madeline Miller's Circe, fuck clean off. This is Homer. If you call Odysseus a whore and not the malewife he canonically is I'll start biting. 😤

[sweetlullabyebye]

Confession attempt n°1 dearly beloved (scene under the cut)

[starrysharks]

i am the cattt just chillin outt but in the night she's all i think aboutttt

[evermorepeyton]

64 quotes and maaaany comments acting like this person actually murdered someone or something pls

[thedreadvampy]

sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'

[frobby]

this came to me in a vision

[evilwizardval]

i'm feeling like deleting every piece of art i've ever posted everywhere so instead of doing that i'm posting my oc marion bc he's one of my faves <3 he's like a magical girl if a magical girl was a boy and also an alien (i had a reference for the first drawing but i cannot find it rn since i made this last year </3, i'll try to find it tomorrow)