#idk whether it's cause Im bi or what

[bardicious]

After some deliberation I've come to realize I'm just not very into typical masculine dudes.

[louisjude]

I feel like atp even if there were plans to make bvddie canon theyre gone now. if tim minear is even half as petty as I am he would see that reaction and go u know what fuck you u actually don't get what you want now cause ur acting so goddamn entitled. like when tarlos fans got mad about the deleted scenes instead of appreciating them being released and his reaction was to say "okay fine then I just won't release deleted scenes anymore" (like I'm sure it was mostly a marketing decision but part of me thinks they intentionally released a scene about bucktommy just to prove a point.) idk man it's just really upsetting as a bi man to see the absolutely vile shit bvddie stans are saying and even tho I love the ship I now never want it to go canon cause they've fuckin ruined it

hey anon, at first let me agree with the fact that i do in fact also love bvddie a lot and i still love reading fics for them, the edits of them are fantastic and the fanart is S tier. it’s a great pairing with a lot of potential there IF the writers decided to ever go there but…

huge answer below

yeah, i agree. i honestly think before tommy was introduced again in 7x03 and the kiss in 7x04 that in my brain, bvddie was the most logical endgame for buck until it wasn’t.

i came into the show shipping bvddie much like a lot of new fans to the show but instead of hopping onto the tommy anti express hate train i found myself falling in love with buck and tommy together. at first i was still on board with bvddie still being endgame but as each episode aired after 7x04 i became faced with the reality of the situation (at least the way i see it) that bvddie might always be fanon and that’s ok because fandom keeps ships alive whether they’re canon or not. some of the biggest ships EVER are non-canon (i mean, cmon spirk? one of the OG MM ships?) so it didn’t really deter me from enjoying bvddie to this day. what HAS deterred me from interacting with bvddie content is toxic bvddies. i don’t like using the lil nicknames, idc if other ppl do, whatever, but i prefer just referring to certain kinds as just toxic plain and simple.

toxic shippers have made it difficult for anyone who multiships to interact with bvddie content. while there are incredibly nice & welcoming bvddie endgamers out there, it doesn’t overshadow the hateful ones in my online experience at least. i’ve blocked so many ppl over this ship discourse, which ive never had to do with any other fandom before the extent i have with 911. everyday i still find new ppl to block, you go under almost any comment section on the 911 insta and its filled with nasty comments abt tommy and only caring abt whether bvddie will be canon in s8. people projecting their hatred of tommy/lou onto the cast/crew of the show when it’s be said and proven time and time again that it’s quite the opposite. now im certain there’s bad apples in the bucktommy side as well, but from what ive seen online so far it is not nearly to the caliber of the bvddie side. ive blocked maybe a handful of bucktommy’s for being hateful towards eddie or being toxic overall, but ive probably blocked over 100+ toxic bvddies. i can only imagine it’d be worse if i was active on 911 twt which i’m not (thank god) but i have ventured into the tags before on there and let me tell you, it’s fucking horrifying how gross ppl are over there. twt is a cesspool for fandom anyways tho, the fucking asshole of fandom, it’s a septic tank really.

now im my own opinion which could be completely untrue of course, but just basing my thoughts on what i’ve seen online and interviews and such, tim seems to be really happy about bucktommy and idk how ppl believe otherwise. tim has expressed he loves LFJ and wanted him back on the show. tim showed up on set for the kiss scene. tim posting an entire youtube vibe abt bucktommy being soulmates that touches on the invisible string theory and explains how they accidentally found buck’s perfect match. tim sharing the deleted tommy scene is also huge but im waiting to see if he releases more (because i remember seen somewhere that he said there’d be more?) and if he does then great but it’s also still pretty telling to me after the whole karaoke fiasco.

oliver has said nothing but praises towards buck’s queer storyline. he quite literally said if you dont like it then watch something else. despite ppl saying he’s never interacted with bucktommy content online, that’s a lie because he has liked fanart of them.

aisha, kenneth & tracie have all expressed how they like tommy/lou and love working with him.

jlh said she loved bvddie before but is excited to see where buck and tommy go and then on an insta live said she doesn’t think bvddie is happening and was bombarded by toxic fans to the point of ending the live early.

ppl think it’s all some ruse to make it seem like bvddie is never happening so when it does happen it’s a “surprise” ……..

the nasty hate comments are doing nothing but exposing these types of ppl for who they are and that honestly to them, 911 is just the bvddie show to them. the people who run these social media accs for 911 are looking at these comments and cringing, they aren’t running to tim and abc being like “we must give these crazies what they want!” they’re mostly likely being ignored or honestly, as you said, being looked at and just reinforcing their decision to most likely make tommy buck’s endgame so as long as his schedule is open for filming.

what gets me the most about the hate these types of shippers spew online is how they aren’t embarrassed because they are so sooo convinced they will be right one day and therefore their insane, nasty behavior online will be justified. oliver stark literally left twt because of fans like this, people act like he was joking around, that he was shooting the shit probably because “he’s british and british people just have that kind of humor” which yes to a certain extent but let me just add these posts to set an example to why if oliver were still on twt he absolutely would not be happy with the way toxic bvddies are acting right now.

oliver (and ryan&other cast too) being positive abt bvddie never meant it was going to be canon of become canon one day. they do not decide these things, whether they believe it should or not. a lot of bvddie shippers come from previous fandoms where queerbaiting was there, where they were made fun of by actors of their ships, by the creators of the show! so i understand the frustration but oliver is not queerbaiting and buck is not a queerbait character when he quite literally is now confirmed bisexual and in a relationship with a man.

he’s just not the “correct” queer to these people. despite headcanons (hell even i hc eddie as queer!!) eddie so far, in canon, is not queer. by the end s7 he is still shown to not be over shannon and ruins his relationship with his son over this. ryan has stated in interviews he sees eddie as heterosexual, possibly pushing this because of the influx of ship discourse, and he’s glad to see a vulnerable and deep friendship that buck and eddie can have as a straight man and a queer man and how important he thinks it is.

every single thing that points to bvddie never going canon is like they’re being shot point blank in the chest. i get it, your ship not becoming canon sucks, but again, that is what fandom is for! shipping has never been about how canon smth is, there is 20k fics out there for bvddie and they aren’t canon. they can turn that into 40k, 100k, 1M if they really wanted to! instead they use their time and energy posting death threats, wishing death upon a gay character, bullying ppl online for enjoying a ship.

meanwhile from what ive seen bucktommys are rolling with goofy ass spy tommy theories created by antis and making jokes for our own fun.

so yes, i agree overall. they truly don’t deserve what they think they do. we didn’t whine and scream for a deleted scene. they did. we got ours without even expecting it and are having fun.

maybe if they behaved better i wouldn’t be so petty abt it. it’s a shame because of how much potential it has, unfortunately it is just not going that way atm. and even if it does one day, it is not because they paraded online with hate, it is because that’s the story tim and the others wanted to write and abc approved it.

🫳🎤

[soaln]

‼️⁉️🙏🏽 Gotta be the first to request you know what I'm saying

Can you make a poly relationship between the male reader (preferably FTM but whatever works), Sanji and Zoro!

It can be any scenario because I can't think (don't be angst, not trying to cry my eyes out.)

- Mr. Off

╰┈➤ ZORO & SANJI

🎀 ;; fluff,male reader (ftm),poly <3,fem dni,bad grammar,idk if it’s angst(im sorry 😭if it is),lazy at the end,ooc(like always)

🌸 ;; got not idea for an one shot

HEADCANONS,,

• The thought of dating both Zoro and Sanji was something that you didn’t expect. You never thought that’ll happen.

• when you first interact with Zoro and Sanji it wasn’t like love at first sight you were quite distant. They didn’t mind of course.

• you started to get along with Sanji,because of your cooking skills how bad/good you were at it. Then with Zoro it’s mostly because of some missions/adventure forced both of you to socialize a bit to not be awkward.

• As the months passed, you began to develop some feelings for these two people. At first you didn’t thought much of it but when you started to realize this love who was more than that of a love of friendship,you panicked.

• Sanji was huge womanizer and Zoro,well you didn’t know much. You began to deny those feelings.

• after finding out this feeling,talking to them wasn’t like before it wasn’t smooth and sweet it was hesitant.

• Sanji was the first to notice your change of attitude. He always observed you whether from far or near [kinda creepy].

• when you came in the crew he didn’t thought much of you,women was his top priorities.When you mentioned your cooking skills he wanted to see how ‘good you were.

• that’s what made you guys closer than b4. The cook started to caught some feelings for you,he didn’t want to believe it,him falling for a man ? And it took time for him to realize his feelings[you’re totally his bi awakening w Zoro🔥]

• Finally,Zoro,he realized your change of attitude when he was talking and he just turned his head around for few seconds you already disappeared.

• he didn’t know what to say he was just irritated. It also took a while for Zoro to start having feelings for you.

• You guys got closer because of a random situation you guys got yourselves into. He first impression on you was that you’re gonna be as annoying as Sanji [judging by your looks] he thought wrong.

• Zoro isn’t best with emotion and everybody know it. When he find out his crush for you well he asked Robin some help she was kind of surprised ‘cause Zoro seems like a person who wouldn’t fall in love with someone but she didn’t judge and said ‘you should confess first,[Name] isn’t the type to confess first.’

• When Sanji found out about Zoro’s crush he wasn’t happy about [ofc he wouldn’t 😒] but he decided to not fight about it.

• He chooses to share you,Zoro was surprised by that but he didn’t mind it the rivalry between them was still there.

• They both asked you out,you felt your face turning warm and you mumble your words well you accept both of them.

• The first time getting together was quite awkward none of you really dated someone.(maybe sanji)

• but you guys started to get comfortable after few months. Sanji and Zoro started to fight over you,of who could make you feel better.

• at first it was a little annoying but you get used to it.

• When you guys go on dates it’s really funny [for you specially] seeing them fight makes you laugh for some reason.

• baths. Baths with each other,well Sanji and Zoro are both male assigned At birth,you were ashamed of your chest scars and genital pars and so uncomfortable.

• They didn’t want to force you,so they waited until you were comfortable.

•but you finally decided to fight it and tell them that you’re a trans guy,well they aren’t the first person you told about your transition [it was chopper] and you knew they will not care about it and support you.

• It was in the kitchen,Sanji on Zoro were both here. "I’m trans." You blurted. Zoro was the one who was the most confused in the kitchen,but he didn’t cared about it so much he supported you and told you that a man shouldn’t be ashamed of his scars.

• Sanji was supporting you,and will be helping you the most in your dysphoric day calling some randoms manly petnames to comfort you.(he’s such a bbg <3)

[coff-in]

hii, I had made a request earlier but idk if you had got it, so I'm writing again just to be safe.

earlier I had a thought about how would Andrew be with a overly affectionate younger brother(reader)...? Like Andy and said younger brother would be cuddling on the couch watching some shitty movie Ashley had put on and she keeps glancing over to keep tabs on Andy and their her older siblings, knowing she can't do anything about it. So later that night when Andy gets his "nightmares" he crawls into his younger brothers bed while he's still awake because he can't sleep, so reader starts teasing Andy, and they take it from there 🤭

notes from coff-in: I DID GET YOUR PREVIOUS ASK AND IM KEEPING IT FOREVER!!! /positive what's better than incest? therapy and gay incest. LET ANDREW AND ASHLEY BE BI OR SOMETHING PLEASE!!! sorry. i'm losing myself rn, please enjoy what i have cooked up. this is also a ramble, i'm in a rambling mood rn

[masc] reader-insert, [reader] is younger than ashley by about one year, NSFW, incest, dry-humping

omg imagine if andrew liked boys :3 that's it send tweet. i wonder if andrew would have conflicting emotions about his feelings towards his brother since that's his brother you know? like, especially if he still has his incestuous feelings towards ashley, would he feel bad if he had them towards [reader], too? god, he is such a sis/sibcon. just some food for thought you know? (especially if he's dating julia around this time, omg. he goes on dates with julia while thinking about ashley or something and when he's at home he's getting real close and comfy with his baby brother-- poor julia)

i think an overly affectionate (especially physically) little brother would be kinda perfect for andrew. he definitely shows his love threw physical touch whether it's playing with his hair or holding his hand or pulling him close. there's also that added layer to their dynamic that they're both boys/guys, there's nothing wrong with them being shirtless or naked in the same room with each other and such. andrew could brush off their closeness as just them being brothers, this is normal for them cause they're brothers, nothing weird about this at all.

ashley being jelly of her baby bro is so silly to me omg. she presses herself to andrew's other side while they all watch a movie together but she still glances at andrew's arm draped around [reader], playing with his hair, or how [reader]'s probably laying his head on andrew's lap. ashley's not mad (maybe a little concerned because if andrew is exclusively attracted to guys that could be an avenue of control she loses access to) but she's letting it be known that she wants attention too.

later that night, [reader]'s in bed probably just staring at the ceiling or listening to the clock tick by to try to go to sleep. he looks over and sees andrew standing above them and he automatically lifts up his blanket to welcome him under. andrew encompasses [reader] in his arms and holds himself close to him while [reader] teases him, "do you need your little brother to help you sleep? poor andrew, it's okay. i'm here for you." and then, AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN

[reader] places a little kiss on his cheek. "there, there. all better, see?"

andrew is just like "wh-what the fuck? you can't just--" "why not? it's just a little kiss on the cheek. moms and dads give kisses on the cheek in movies." AAAUGH!!! love them love them love them. the cuddling turns into like a light makeout session, with [reader] and andrew kissing each other anywhere BUT the lips. just light pecks here and there, you know like brothers do.

time passes of them doing this and it evolves into rubbing against each other. at some point whenever andrew lets go and just fucking admits that he's a little incestuous freak (non-derogatory) he just starts humping [reader]. first while they're laying next to each other spooning but one point he gets on top of him and starts humping him like a dog, "ah- ugh- good boy... fuck..." "doesn't this feel better, andrew?" "yeah... it feels- uhg-- much much better now."

im absolute shit with dialogue but please see my vision, i beg of you. also thank you for bringing this to me. this was honestly so delicious

(no joke while writing this i was listening to an audio from reddit about a femboy little brother being used as a substitute for his big brother's girlfriend and OH MY GOODNESS)

embrace and indulge

----

coff-in

[multishipperofgaydeadwizards]

oKaY listen! Jegulus is my OTP and I LOVE me some Bartylus too, but REGULUS & PANDORA 🥹🥹🥹

My babies!!!

Just that they understand each other in a way nobody else can and and and AHHH

1. Okay first of all: SHIP NAMES

Their most common one is Regdora which - kinda boring? Like it’s not bad, but when we have names like STARCHASER or NOBLEFLOWER or FLOWERPOT for other ships that just won’t do. Therefore my suggestion:

Stargazer

Because Star - Regulus (no explanation needed) and like gazer as kind of a synonym for seer?? Alternatively I have Starseer or Waterbox (Water for Reggie like in Moonwater + Pandoras Box yk), but Stargazer just sounds so Stargazer.

2. I OBVIOUSLY love them as an „Arranged Marriage I don’t want AT ALL (why are there butterflies in my stomache??) trope“, BUT also as the „we are queer best friends and jealous of each others partners, but idk why” trope!!

Also how many AMAZING Dynamics they have??

- Grumpy x Sunshine

- I hate everyone, but you and you love everyone, but you love me the most

- Soulmates

- Best Friends to Lovers

- ENEMIES TO LOVERS (Arranged marriage trope)

3. The DENIAL the both of them would have (especially when they are both seers) like:

„I saw a prophecy that showed me and Reggie in a Cottage with a child that could be related to us - MUST BE BECAUSE HES THE GODFATHER“

„Had a Dream abt Panda standing in front of me in a wedding gown - GOOD TO KNOW IM GONNA BE HER BEST MAN“

DO YOU GET WHAT I MEAN??🥹

or the Arranged Marriage Trope??

„Dream Abt making out against a door with Regulus - HOW WEIRD”

“Wow Pandora looks like a goddess in that dress, her glare makes me feel fuzzy and I want to smooth the frown on her forehead with my fingers while she looks up at me - IVE GOTTA REALLY LIKE THAT DRESS TO THINK LIKE THAT”

4. Once they ACTUALLY start dating they would literally be inseparable. They would cuddle and kiss and talk 24/7! Even their me-time they both need turns into us-time and is just as effective. They would start to panic if they don’t see each other for more than a DAY. Also their dates would be sooo cute!! No matter whether it would be the cozy queer cafe around the corner or the flashy pureblood dance balls. They would have such a comfy aura and nobody would mind their pda cause they would be so comfortable with each other.

Sometimes they would just spend a day in absolute silence but a COZY COMFY DOMESTIC ONE yk???

Also the “I hate physical touch except for when it’s you” trope!!

5. Just then going to a pride parade together with matching outfits in like their 30s, already married and a bi flag on Reggie’s cheeks and a Pan one on Dora’s and they would be so PROUD.

Or just the courting process in the arranged marriage trope PEAK!!

6. They are love. They are soulmates. They are Stargazer (or Waterbox still unsure bout that one)

This got WAY longer than I originally intended but oh well :)

REGDORA!!! FAIRYSEEKER!!! MY LOVES <33333

you don't understand how much I adore them. I love love love them. they're my everything's <3 my hunnies <3 my sweet little babies <3

okay so, 1. I actually don't mind the name regdora, but yes, it's blant and ugly compared to everything else. personally, I know them as fairyseeker, which is what you can find them under on my blog lmao. stargazer is a GORGEOUS ship name... though I think of regularly every time I hear it lmao

i LOVE the name waterbox. idk why I just adore it

2. yesssssssss!!! istg they have the best troupes (next to bartylily). them as arranged marriage partners sounds so fun. imagine they're just kids when they first meet, and they're told they're supposed to get married when they grow up to combine the rosiers/lestranges

at first, they don't mind (they're tiny and have no idea what being married even means). they start hogwarts, and both realise that they're into their same gender people (once again, i bring up my mtf dora + ftm reg). so both spend a lot of time just convinced they aren't into each other. reg is a lesbian after all, and pandora is gay... then they come out as trans and both are like: oh-

3. grumpy x sunshine is so them omfg

them bith as seers???? Christ. them being so fucking blind is just so fitting. they never even consider that they might like each other

them as oblivious little fuckers so true. they are in deep denial fr. regulus is foaming out the mouth at how pandora is, but it's completely platonic

4. HSEIBSIEBSOENSO YESS OMFG

All they need is each other. they're always together, getting one of them alone is impossible. you can try, and you will fail

that trope is SO them. it's insane

5. they would definitely love their time at a pride parade. they're having the time of their lives and they've been happier

6. I love it when asks go this long. it just sucks because I usually can't add anything on because you guys are just so correct already 😮‍💨

thank you for sharing your brain with me. I appreciate it a lot <3

[bellabrady]

I need to vent this to someone and idk why but i just feel like you’ll understand me idk but….

I’m terrified about next week’s episode… like I feel like there is so much within the fandom that is hanging onto next week’s episode being a definite thing on whether or not buddie will go canon, and it’s been stressing me out seeing all of the discourse… I have so many strong feelings about the idea of Tommy (who has always pissed me off as a character from the Begins episodes) and how so many people just suddenly out of nowhere love the guy and compare him to Buck and Eddie when there has literally been barely anything comparable to the two of them as characters since he’s been back. Not only that, but the theory of Buck and Tommy being a thing as a potential for Eddie to come to terms with his feelings doesn’t make me feel comfortable— Not in a “omg i just want Buck and Eddie to jump into bed with each other and call it a day” because i don’t… I just know us queer people are still only seen as tokens half the time, and I’m worried that if they pair Buck with a guy (while Yay for bi!Buck) who is a character that A) is from his past, and B) is for some reason all of a sudden adored by a bunch of people (for reasons i will never understand)… I’m afraid they will just put he and Buck together and call it a day, and just keep Eddie and Buck as “brothers” when that is such a disservice to both of them… If Buck does become confirmed as bisexual, I have no issue with him exploring his sexuality with other men who aren’t principal characters because that won’t have any bearing on the finality of buddie as a ship, but I’m afraid that by putting Buck and Tommy together will somehow be ABC’s way of saying “Eh this will do” because of the way so many people have suddenly jumped onto the bucktommy train.

On top of that, the idea of getting jealous!buck would make me happy if it weren’t for the fact that it’s Tommy, and I am terrified that the writers are trying to wrap him up in this glittering duct tape bow and say “we’re not going to give you what you’ve been asking for for 6 years, but we’ll give you this cheap knock off” due to the speculation that Eddie will somehow reaffirm that he sees Buck as just a friend being the catalyst for Buck exploring his sexuality with Tommy.

It would be painful as a longtime buddie truther, but it would also be painful as a genuine fan of the characters because i feel like that would ruin everything they have built together over the past 6 years, and it would be a cop-out because they don’t want to go that route, even though they are the ones who have set up buddie in this context on so many different occasions…. sure a lot of buddie moments can be real things that happened in platonic relationships, but the framing and subtext has always been this will they/won’t they dynamic, and it feels so icky to me for them to make Buck Bi, and have him NOT end up with Eddie.

And I know people are quick to point out Ryan and Oliver in these recent interviews and everything as some sort of evidence towards buddie canon, but I would think a lot of us have been in this carousel long enough to know that if the possibility of a popular queer romance on a show is one of the BIGGEST marketing tactics that shows use. I’m not saying that Ryan and Oliver themselves are queerbaiting because of how much they’ve supported the buddie fandom over the years, but something in me feels like a lot of their PR appearances lately have been to intentionally cause speculation so that they don’t lose the buddie portion of the viewers when they rip the rug out from under us…. (again not blaming Ryan and Oliver AT ALL because they have no say)

idk if any of that makes sense and im sorry for like the novel i just wrote in your asks lmao but i just needed to get that off my chest and you are one of the few people I have seen who also seems to dislike Tommy’s character, and could maybe possibly see where I’m coming from with my anxiety on this whole thing because it’s been making me spiral lately….

it’s just this ship (as i’m sure it is to others) is really important to me and seeing the online support of a bucktommy romance as a means of getting buddie worries me that the writers will take that as people wanting bucktommy canon and just giving us that as consolation for not giving us buddie and that breaks my heart because i have such a deep connection to both Buck and Eddie in different ways, and i want to see them and their relationship done good service, and frankly none of the theories i’ve seen surrounding it have been anything i want to see with them because i hate tommy, and don’t want him of all people to be the reason we get screwed over.

hi there! you pretty much described exactly what i've been feeling and i 100% understand and feel your anxiety. most people have been super excited for the next ep but i truly feel like it won't go over well for us (though i'll gladly be pleasantly surprised). i even had to log off twitter for a bit because thinking about all the potential ways this thing with tommy could go was giving me legitimate anxiety (yes i'm aware that's not an entirely normal way to feel about a tv show, but sue me, i'm mentally ill)

i feel like i also haven't really been able to enjoy 911 twitter, tumblr, tiktok etc anymore because so many people, like you said, just jumped onto the bucktommy train and i hate it for so many reasons. i just wish everybody was as keen on ignoring that guy as i am.

so yes, i completely agree with you and i definitely relate. i'm glad you felt like you could vent to me and if you ever wanna DM me so we can share our anxiety a bit, please feel free! <3

[rossary-of-the-rose]

my friend just told me he likes me more than a friend and i’m here like 🙂 bcus it affects me in no way whatsoever whether we start dating or not, i’ll love him the same way and amount either way and idk if that’s rude or not? Like, im pretty sure that’s not the way ur supposed to respond when someone confesses to u?

anyway we said we’d text more and see what happens but i just wanted to share cause like. i feel basically nothing besides slight caution bcus this usually doesn’t end well for me and that’s probably not a good thing right? did i offend him by having basically no reaction? i want to support him cause he just came out as bi like last month and that’s awesome but he lives rlly far away so i’m not sure he’d feel fulfilled with me as a bf considering the distance and the fact im arospec asexual, so the cons outweigh the pros but i feel like i can’t say that to him cause that’s probably not an allo response, right? and like i love him so i doubt i’d mind much if we did date but it just wouldn’t be very convenient for either of us and just what am i supposed to do in this scenario lol.

help me out pls ppl my queer ass cannot rn.

[zombeats]

LGBTQ+ BSD HEADCANONS!!!

(im using "any pronouns" for he/she/they + neos to make it easier for me cause i usually dont know whether "any pronouns" includes neos or not.

i also put some xenogenders in so if you dont know one or are curious, look them up!! theyre super cool! i tried to use some that are somewhat known to make them easier to find but xenogenders are kinda hard to find in general so)

(also im probably spelling names wrong PLS FORGIVE ME IF I AM im tired and idk how to spell 😕😕)

quick guide for anyone confused!!!

masc terms = masculine terms (i.e boyfriend, bro, dude, brother)

fem terms = feminine terms (i.e girlfriend, sister, wife)

neu terms = neutral terms (i.e partner, sibling, spouse, significant other)

all or any terms = fem, masc, + neu terms (i.e partner, girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband, spouse)

format-

name: gender - pronouns - terms - sexuality

reason why i think this and/or little hc about it

ADA

Dazai: bigender (nb + male) - he/they/xe - masc + neu terms - bi + ace

he had a lot of gender crises while in the PM and eventually realized that he could be both nonbinary and male. chuuya pretended to be really irritated with all the pronoun and term changes but was very supportive and patient

Kunikida: trans man - he/him - masc + neu terms - gay + demisexual

he was very nervous about teaching at first because he didnt know if the students would know if he was trans or not but ended up "passing" really well and no one knew until he decided to tell them and then all the queer kids went to him for help/advice

atsushi: cis male - he/xe - masc terms - bi

was very nervous abt coming out and repressed his attraction to men until he joined the ADA and felt safe enough to accept who he was and came out

yosano: bigender (nonbinary and female) - she/they - fem + neu terms - lesbian ace

didnt realize she was queer until she met ranpo and he suggested she might be. after that, he helped her try pronouns and terms until they found what fit. as a way of saying thanks, she did his nails and helped him through his gender crisis

ranpo: bigender (male and female) - he/she/they - any terms - bi demiromantic ace

didnt realize he was bigender until yosano did his nails and had a gender crisis. it took him a week to figure it out and hes still embarrassed about it

fukuzawa: trans man - he/they - masc terms - aroace

never felt interested in romantic or sexual relationships and didnt realize that it wasnt "normal" until people started dating eachother and talking about sex

jun'ichirō: cis man - he/him - masc terms - straight demiromantic asexual

was super confused when his sister kept getting crushes on guys and talked about dating them when they barely knew eachother. when he tried to look up why that was a thing, he came across the labels demiromantic and asexual and realized it applied to him

kenji: cis man - he/she/they - any terms - unlabeled

doesnt care what people refer to them as, they know their own gender and thats all that matter to him. also does not care for labels, he likes who he likes

kyouka: demigirl - she/they - fem + neu terms - bi

had no time to explore her identity while in the PM so they only discovered themself when they joined the ADA. dazai was actually the one to help her find the labels and pronouns that fit her

naomi: trans woman - she/her - fem terms - pan

she insisted for jun'ichirō to call her a girl at a young age and it scared him at first. after looking it up, he realized she was trans and waited until middle school to help her find a name for herself. when she reached high school, he then hunted down an ability user who could change someone's appearance for help because they couldn't afford hormones and surgery

kirako: cis woman - she/ze - fem terms - bi

she found neopronouns when she was in middle school and experimented for months before finding ze/zir and realized how much she liked them. she didn't tell anyone about it because ze was embarrassed but then finally felt safe enough with naomi to talk about it

THE GUILD

fitzgerald: cis male - he/they - masc terms - gay

had a long talk with every member about how he wouldn't tolerate discrimination in the guild. it was kinda awkward since everyone there was queer.

POE!!: genderfluid (female, male, agender) - he/she/ve/xe - any terms - uranic demisexual

uses karl to let others know how hes feeling (karl likes being dressed up he gave consent)!! he puts a bow on karl when xe feels feminine, a tie when ve feels masculine, and a little sweater when she feels like neither!! ranpo thinks it's adorable. also genderfluid poe is canon

melville: cis male - he/him - masc terms - gay

also did the "no discrimination tolerated" speech but it was 10x more awkward

louisa: demigirl - she/they/sol - fem + neu terms - pan

talks with poe about neos a lot!! has fun making up new ones although sol doesn't use them

lovecraft: genderqueer- they/voi - neu terms - aroace

likes trying out new neos although they never seem to fit void for long

james: cis male - he/him - masc terms - unlabeled

he feels very lonely being the only unlabeled person in the group but none of them make fun of him or say anything rude and always try to include him without insinuating/accidentally using lables for him

steinbeck: demiboy - he/cloud - neu terms - gay

jokingly makes fun of neos a lot, will kill someone who actually does

montgomery: trans girl - she/her - fem terms - bi

will constantly refer to herself in third person when shes feeling dysphoric so that the others know and try to help (for example, "hey, am i not the strongest girl in the group?")

margaret: trans woman - she/her - fem terms - pan ace

loves hyping herself up (as she should) and always makes sure to hype up other trans people and compliments them a lot

mark: trans man - he/him - masc terms - bi

sees lucy as a little sister and always helps her when shes feeling dysphoric. loves to buy her cute dresses and does her hair a lot

hawthorne: nonbinary - he/they - neu terms - gay

loves browsing queer forums and is super active in the community. always helps answer questions anyone has and loves educating people about gender and sexuality

PM

ryunosuke: bigender (male + female) - she/he/it - fem + masc terms - uranic

only told gin and chuuya about it because he didn't feel safe enough to tell dazai. she was only able to tell him about it after chuuya told it dazai was also queer (WITH PERMISSION). IM A SHE/HER RYUU TRUTHER OK IT JUST FITS SO WELL

gin: genderqueer/apagender - any/all - any terms - lesbian

they never felt weird when people used he/him pronouns on them or used male terms. talked to chuuya about it and after a long discussion, they came to the conclusion that they just did not care what people used for them. told ryuu right after so she would stop getting mad at people for using the "wrong" pronouns/terms.

chuuya: genderfluid (male + nonbinary) - he/ve/it/nix - any terms - uranic ace

the "elder queer" amongst the PM. everyone goes to it for advice. nix actually never had a realization moment, he just always switched between feeling like a man and feeling somewhere in between. the only confusion it had was what to call this, and ve eventually found the label for it.

higuchi: astrumgender - she/star/sol/moon/xe - neu terms - pan

had no idea how to describe sol's gender until xe found a xenogender masterlist on the internet. she found it interesting and kept trying to analyze what star's gender felt like when moon saw one that seemed close to what they felt. she finally landed on astrumgender however it wasnt until a week later, when she tried it again, that xe realized it described star. gin helped her with pronouns.

ace: genderqueer - he/she/they - any terms - gay

found out about all the different gender while gambling with someone. looked it all up later and decided to settle with genderqueer cuz she didn't feel like trying out a ton of different labels (honestly me too)

kōyō: trans fem - she/they/ae - fem + neu terms - neptunic ace

thought neptunic meant "attracted to masculine people" until gin told them that it actually meant "someone attracted to nonbinary people and women". ae felt it described aer better than lesbian did so she started using that label. (honestly i keep getting neptunic and uranic mixed up. i keep thinking the terms are neptunic for liking masc people and sapphic for liking fem. then uranic comes outta nowhere to remind me of my dumbassery 💀 i gotta memorize this shit. the flags dont help either)

verlaine: ethegender - any/all - any terms - gay ace

always felt confused by their gender, he could never describe it in thought, feelings, or words. he always felt like it was at his fingertips but she just couldn't get a hold of it. xe fell down a gender rabbit hole one day and felt that ehtegender described it perfectly. this was also when it discovered the label ace.

hirostu: cis male - he/him - masc terms - aroace

thought everyone knew he was aroace until someone asked him if he had a wife during a meeting. he said he didn't cause he wasn't interested in that or sex and it was deathly quiet for two minutes before he said he was aroace to clarify. they like to tell that story to new members for a quick laugh

arthur: agender - he/they - neu terms - gay aroace

took forever to rediscover their identity. they knew something felt wrong when people used masc terms for him so he asked mori about it. it was a very awkward conversation

elise: cis girl - she/her - fem terms - straight aroace

got very confused when mori kept asking if she had any crushes yet. finally decided to ask him abt what he meant and that was when they both realized she was on the aroace spectrum

Q: agender - they/xe/voi - neu terms - unlabeled

they're actually very happy for their natural androgynous appearance, cause xe never gets misgendered. ofc voi told the PM of their neos but xe never expected them to get used and they cried when chuuya casually said "why are you talking about Q that way?? xe's a kid. leave xem alone".

karma: trans boy - he/him - masc terms - gay

had a very awkward conversation with ace when ace realized he was trans. he was seriously hoping ace just turned him into a gem to escape the conversation. surprisingly managed to teach her a lot of things about the community and proper etiquette when talking to queer people

kajii: trans masc - he/they/xe/ve/ae/div - neu terms - pan demiromantic

neopronoun collector. loves neos. gains neos each week. lost track of them and had to start over three times. ryuu loves using his div's new neos cause it adds some excitement to his life

oda: demiboy- he/she - fem + masc terms - uranic

when she met dazai, it took a lot of patience for him to teach them about pronouns and gender. had no idea dazai was bigender until xe came out to him about it. absolutely no gaydar

ango: nonbinary- he/they - masc + neu terms - gay

phenomenal gaydar, clocked everyone immediately. oda didnt even have time to come out to them, they already knew. knew about dazai, too, but wanted him to figure it out on their own

mori: fuck him, cishet (just realized two seconds after posting that i forgot to add him lol)

THE SILLIES (DOA)

fyodor: agender - any/all - any terms - gay ace

i feel like he sees himself as a divine being or at least something other than human. he has this whole thing of "doing god's will/mission". and imo divine beings are genderless. so i think he would see himself as above gender. i would've just done they/them + neos but honestly? i dont think she would care about pronouns at all so. ALSO nikolai LOVES finding the most out there neos to use for fyodor he finds it so fun. he uses new ones every day

NIKOLAI!!!!: genderqueer - he/they + any/all neos - neu terms - gay demiromantic ace

i feel like nikolai just does not care about pronouns. i also think he wouldnt mind she/her but find a little displeasure in it. he would probably rate she/her as a 4/10 if 0 was hate and 10 was love. he almost feels neutral about it but theres just a little but of dislike. he also LOVES silly neos like clown or honk. he loves it even more when fyodor uses his silly neos cause fyodor is so serious all the time

sigma: aliengender - they/them - neu terms - aroace

currently experimenting with neos. nikolai is obviously helping. their whole thing is that they came from a book so they don't feel like they're "human" (imo, having emotions is what makes you human but its their existential crisis so). anyways i think because of this, they would feel a detachment from gender and would feel like no gender truly fits them but that aliengender fits best (even if its not a perfect fit)

bram: bigender (female + male) - he/she/they - neptunic

she definitely has conversations with nikolai and sigma about gender and how it's expressed. her and nikolai try to teach sigma about it but it just goes over their head (same). definitely goes into great detail describing what his gender feels like to sigma and they're honestly having a great time. gender tea parties every wednesday

fukuchi: trans male - he/him - masc terms - straight

bonded with fukuzawa over being trans. they definitely met in a gsa. tries to be supportive of nikolai but his head spins just thinking about all the neopronouns so they teach him a new set once a week to ease the process. fyodor makes fun of him for it

HUNTING DOGS

JOUNO<3: trans masc - he/they/xe/ae - neu terms - gay demiromantic

taught tetchō and fukuchi what neos were and how to use his. ae has no idea how fukuchi went this long without knowing what they were since fukuchi is quite literally an "elder trans" and has been in the community for decades. teases him about it sometimes when teruko isn't around

teruko: trans woman - she/star - fem terms - pan ace

taught fukuchi how to use her neos. almost killed tetchō when he asked about star's neos because she had no idea he was listening to her teach fukuchi. tries to fight jouno over who's are better (he doesn't care).

tetchō: caligovague - they/ae/jhey/kei/ve/mu - neu terms - uranic ace

after being taught what neos are by jouno, mu went on a deep dive because ve found it interesting. jhey discovered so many neo ae like it was insane and also found a very fitting xenogender. they went to jouno and talked about it and finally told everyone else (fukuchi almost had a stroke trying to learn jheir pronouns).

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED ANYONE THIS TOOK FOREVER!!! also if you want clarification on any pronouns or genders please don't hesitate to ask!!! i had a lot of fun looking for genders and pronouns to fit them although i do worry there wasn't enough variety 😕

[farmerlesbian]

hey im following up on your "lesbians and genderweird people" post.

do you also include people that are men as a part of their multi-gender expression? say a bigender person that is a woman and a man at once?

idk im probably thinking about it too hard but im just trying to wrap my head around it. just looking for straight (hah) answers about specifics. which i also see is a little futile cause gender is weird.

sorry if this line of questioning is uncomfortable to you.

anw i hope you have a good time and happy pride

thank you for actually asking haha instead of just jumping to big sweeping conclusions! 😅🥴

also happy pride! 🌈🧡💜

honestly i don’t know any bi-gender people! at least i don’t think i do haha i don’t ask every person i meet the details of their gender. so i don’t feel comfortable making any claims about them especially big sweeping claims.

to me, i cannot envision being comfortable being into someone that is aligned with manhood, in whatever way or terms they choose to use. for me, if I was, I would need to seriously consider whether the label Lesbian is accurate for me.

I think if someone is encountering this in their relationship, they should navigate it on an interpersonal level. by that I mean, figure out the labels and how to handle it as an individual for yourself and with the bi-gender or multi-gender person. Instead of on a like macro level “let’s define what Lesbian means” sort of deal.

I don’t believe that when talking about “Lesbianism can include attraction to nonbinary people” I am saying every nonbinary person. I’m saying it can include some nonbinary people. those who are cool with it and it makes sense for! not every person is gonna be okay with it, or does it make sense for, of course. nonbinary or genderweird or whatever term, they are very broad umbrellas and describe a wide variety of gender experiences.

It’s also important to keep in mind that people can describe their experiences for themselves. Different people are going to define their labels in different ways, sometimes in ways we disagree with. It’s important to be able to differentiate someone describing their own experience and defining things for themselves and defining a term broadly for everyone. And I mean this when seeing what other people are saying and also to keep in mind for oneself.

Hope this answers what you were asking and is helpful and makes sense! Also, remember that this is just my opinion and my position. I’m not like declaring this as a universal truth, I’m not the president of the lesbians lol. different lesbians will define their lesbianism for themselves. I can handle that even if I vehemently disagree lol

[redheadbigshoes]

in one of your posts you wrote: „Comphet would be you not understanding what is attraction when it comes to men, it would be you feeling like puking by even thinking of being with men but still thinking you’re attracted to them. To make myself clear: the mere thought of being with a man sexually and being disgusted isn’t comphet, but if that thought still makes you question whether you’re attracted to men or not is.”

so if i was disgusted and not into dating men would that make me a lesbian? i struggle with understanding my attraction to men tbh, i feel like looking back on most of my male crushes (irl cause i rarely if ever like male celebs or fictional men) they feel fake like not real which i don’t really experience with my women crushes, but also i had like 3/4 crushes on women and non were recent. idk if that matters 😭

you’ve answered an ask from me before and i started to identify as a lesbian, and it feels weird, not in a sense that it feels wrong, just kinds weird, my brain is on a constant battle to prove that i like men and that i like that one guy (which idk. he’s cute and all but everything else about him is either a red flag or an ick, i really liked his style but now he’s basic af and i haven’t thought ab him much since summer started), im afraid im faking, im trying to watch more lesbian/wlw movies or read books or just in general associate myself with lesbian centric content, but it hasn’t been much of help? i feel like i have so much lesbophobia in me for no reason as of have nothing against other lesbians, i feel like i can say lesbian but to say it in mu native language feels dirty, i feel almost predatory for liking women (sexually specifically). anyways sorry for the long post and i hope u have a great day!!

Sexuality can be so difficult to label sometimes. I’ve seen a lot of bi sapphics share they’ve disgusted by men, but that’s mostly because a considerable amount of them are shitty, not because they aren’t attracted to them. It’s a different type of disgust ig.

In your case maybe it’s about understanding rather the disgust you feel is linked to lack of attraction to men or if it’s due to another reason that isn’t connected with attraction/sexuality.

What do you mean when you say the crushes you’ve had on men don’t feel real?

Have you tried talking with a bi sapphic? Sometimes it’s more helpful talking with someone who is attracted to men to understand if you like them or not.

That one guy you mentioned, what do you feel if you try imagining yourself romantically/sexually involved with him? You said he’s a red flag, but if you pretend he’s nice, can you imagine yourself with him and feel something positive by that scenario? Or thinking about it is kinda neutral, like you just don’t care or don’t feel anything at all?

I don’t mind long asks :) I hope you have a nice day too!

[lunar-lair]

busts down the door fuck it. off the cuff gender/sexualities headcanons for the rise boys/whoever else i decide. i havent fully considered these/written these out so it might be a hot mess have fun (its also 1 am this is your warning)

see leos a little Special. surprise trans leo is my fav thing ever so what I like to do is ambs (assigned male by splinter, he didnt know the cloacas were in different areas or to start squinting when leos shell got more concave. no i did not know those facts before surprise trans madness/my egg doc i made a whole cloth new however the fuck you say it reproductive system for this fucking turtle so he and his bunny boyfriend could have kids and i could torture him with sliders being oviparous. thank you less-depresso-more-expresso for your leo egg post in december it changed me fundamentally) -> oh . those are eggs. ok *whistling sound as he continues w his life* -> wait gender is a construct. maybe this is a gift -> genderfluidity slaps the kid in the face when theyre abt 17. also hes gay cause it feels right. so does some form of demisexual or romantic but i have a lot of opinions on how his dating life would go and how it would impact his character (rhinocio gets it if u know them. were besties u see) so i think that woudnt hit until more like 18 or smth like that maybe idk

in much more basic terms. genderfluid gay leo ftw we love a trans leo in this house. this goes whether or not you believe in Egg this kid is not cis mark my goddamn words

raph has always screamed she/he to me as she has to most people. im feeling bi. double bi also feels both very right and very funny his siblings would have a ball w that

if mikey doesnt use neopronouns whats the point. gender is a game and mikey is winning. sexuality is also a game and mikey is Still winning. goes w pan but literally would nebulously date anyone as long as they seemed cool and he liked them well enough. they and leo are shaking hands except leo is hoarding like she, he, they, and maybe a couple other neopronouns meanwhile mikey is like im everything all at once fight me abt it. so nonbinary in the everything kind of way. maybe. i have no idea what the name for this is but i know exactly the kind of vibe im talking abt

and ofc donnie is in the absolute opposite direction. he/they, more nonbinary than anything else. rise apritello star lastknownstatus-alive has allured me with aroflux donnie and considering i know like two things abt the aro and ace label existence im absolutely listening. definitely think hes on that spectrum though, it just fits. think hed look at the sexuality thing and go ...none of these are right. and then forgo it entirely. their sexuality is whoever is hot and whoever they fall in love with die abt it

this is where i say that trans man draxum means everything to me and also that man simply isnt straight nor is he allistic (i mean allo as in like hes definitely on the ace/aro spectrum and i didnt realize until rereading a while later but he is also not allistic tbf)

also splinter is bi i rest my case. pretty normal gender on that rat though, even with the gnc everything

april is so . that gender is so everything. hoarding genders like mikey but less so and also less aggressively. less everything all at once and more somethings sometimes and sometimes not other things. shes a solid inbetween of mikey and leo. my brain clocked bi but i honestly dont know why. help i dont know that many names and also i havent been in love in 4 years idk how the sexuality half of this works

also as a disclaimer we as a system (not in our bio bc Fear) identify as genderfluid (not that i know what the flag looks like . look i keep forgetting to look it up ok) but thats because its easier. a lot of us are sort of genderfluid or use multiple pronouns but remembering those gender experiences is HARD . accordingly any discussion of gender and the experience might be totally fucked bc were only so many genders bc there are so many people in this brain. ok im getting off the stepladder w my megaphone where i make separate points now onto casey

my baby my little guy. think the fam wouldve given him the opportunity to explore that stuff as much as he could in the apocalypse. im feeling he/it. thinks gender is a construct. too busy to find a label. would probably like bigender or genderfluid. kind of like mikey, technically works w pan but would date literally whoever whenever wherever as long as there was a preexisting relationship. dont tell him but hes probably demiromantic

and casey sr!!! my girl my lady! i could go either cis or transgirl on her, or even she/they or she/they/he, she does whatever she wants any day of the week. absolutely a lesbian though thats undisputed. also feeling demiro And demiace

this is your last warning that i sussed half of these out based on vibes Right Now. except for leo theyre on my mind 24/7. and mikey mikey felt patently obvious. same for donnie but only gender wise

ok im done now prommy. may or may not fuck around and make a background + oh yeah! thats me!! style fic for these guys if i feel like it. probably wont come out during pride but hey. you dont stop being gay when june ends yk. either way tada ill come back if i decide i was talking bullshit and correct myself later. bc i usually decide i was talking bullshit eventually lmao. probably partially cause im like 18 its a natural side effect of growth occuring at a faster rate due to my younger age. anyways this has been your twice annually actually long and headcanons/fun filled luna post. ill see you in like, october probably, unless i get ballsy, see you then either way lmao

[vies16]

I feel like this page is becoming my journal thing (there’s a shit ton of politics stuff in my drafts lol) so I guess I’m going to write another badly written short essay about my feelings. Anyway it’s asexual awareness week so I thought I would talk about that.

Being ace/aro is interesting because it’s kind of viewed by some people as immature or something you will grow out of. Some adults have this idea that kids are basically ace/aro until they hit puberty and then they start having feelings for other people. But honestly that’s not really true at all and society doesn’t perpetrate that in practice. There are odv plenty of people who are gay talking about how the knew something was different when they were really young but you don’t ever hear that much about straight people because of how normalized it is.

I started IDing as ace around the age of 15 and started questioning at 14. Romantically I’ve on and off questioned whether I was bi or aro since around that age too (im 90% pretty sure I’m aro at this point but who knows).

Looking back I kind of knew since I was young that something was different? I have a very clear memory of being at a birthday party around the age of 9 and we were playing this game with a big, inflatable die where we would roll it and answer the question that it landed on. I had to leave a bit early (the rest were staying for a sleepover) so they had me roll it a final time and it landed on “Who do you have a crush on?” Me, having no feelings for anyone at all said “uh I don’t?” thinking that was normal. The response to that was mostly annoyance, people accusing me of lying, trying to urge me to tell the truth. But the truth was I had no preferences for anyone. And at 9 years old that was apparently unbelievable even by some of the adults in the room.

And I wasn’t going to lie because what if they told whatever dude I said (and the vibe was definitely it had be a guy to these people lol). I eventually said I had a crush on my cat (don’t judge 😂) which was met with one girl whining “nooooooo” all annoyed. Eventually I got out of it but idk, the whole thing did kind of stuck with me (I mean I remember it really clearly 11 years on lol). It was the first time really had it shoved in my face that I might be weird or that something might be wrong with me.

Even after becoming an adult I’ve always felt like I’m too young to know. I have always acknowledged that maybe someone will come along and make me feel that spark or whatever. It’s never happened . People to me are almost too human? Too flawed. Even fictional crushes only kind of work for me because I can control their characterization and every action they take in my head. I can sort of make myself like them like that. But even then I don’t imaging myself with them. There’s no y/n going on in my head. And if they were real people? Hell no.

Another thing that perpetrated about asexuality is that there has to be a reason for it. You have to have trama, you’re antisocial, an incel, are mentally ill, have messed up hormones, taking meds that effect it, or as disgusting terfs think, the apparent rampant castration of kids is causing asexuality (no I’m not exaggerating). And sure, I haven’t had the best time of it for the past 10 years but any real trama came after I started IDing as asexual and none of it is sexual. Im pretty sure I have no hidden trama either because I have a pretty good memory and timeline of my life in my head. I’m very lucky to have never been SAed either. I did worry that maybe because I was quiet and have anxiety that it was being caused by that, but over the past year I’ve been working on being more social and getting a bit more comfortable with people and honestly I’ve never felt more sure that I’m aroace. I’ve never taken meds (for better or worse), pretty sure I’m not an incel, haven’t had any hormone concerns brought up (maybe to much info but I know I have a libido, maybe it’s not the strongest but it definitely exists). This is just who I am bro. Even if some of those assumptions did apply that doesn’t mean I or someone else isn’t actually ace either.

Its also a really weird thing to talk about with people. 99% of the population wants a romantic and/or sexual relationship with an partner. I just don’t and that’s weird and unexpected to some people. But it’s also interesting because it’s unlikely I’m going to start dating someone of the opposite gender so there isn’t much reason to actually come out. Like how would I even start that conversation? I’m also terrified of the “you’re too young and will change your mind when you’re older” comment even though I’m now 20 and it’s not unrealistic to know that stuff at this age now. But if I never date people are bound to eventually notice right? My half-brother didn’t really date much until recently which led to some people speculating he’s gay (as far as I’m aware he’s straight and he currently has a long-time girlfriend). I’ve already started getting the questions about future boyfriends/husband (luckily not from really close family members except for some stray comments) which I’ve gotten around with being more career focused (which I am lol since I do want to travel for my job which doesn’t leave much room for a relationship). Sometimes I wish I was bi because it would sort of be more understandable with family? I know all the people in my family that matter would probably be accepting since my cousin is a Lesbian and so is my mums closest cousin (she and her wife are dope) so I wouldn’t have to worry about that at least. I’m honestly down for a platonic life-partner though, preferably a woman, so if that ever happened it probably wouldn’t raise too may eyebrows.

I don’t know but I kind of want to tell my mum. I think she does kind of know but I’ve never said it explicitly. She actually sat me down less than two years ago and said she would be accepting of me identifying as anything if I wanted too. I also did kind of come out as not straight because I let her stay in the room while i was being asked questions at the doctors about my medical history and they asked about sexual history (none) and then if I was to become active what sex would I be with (both). She also helped defend me against questions about husbands from my grandparents on my dads side (“V’s not really interested in that”) a little over a year ago too. So like she’s aware to certain extent at least and I’m not exactly quiet about the fact that I probably don’t want to be married/have kids but idk, it’s just kind of different sexuality to talk about and there’s not really much of a point to doing so either.

Anyway I just spent an hour writing this post so I’m going to stop. Happy asexual awareness week and thank you for being aware of me if anyone found and bothered to read all this I guess lol

[aroaceconfessions]

Uh hello, I'm kinda questioning... so i think I need advice or something,

I think I found a label that kinda fits but I don't know if it's fair to call myself aspec/under the asexual umbrella

But I'm gonna start from the beginning so this will make sense,

Ps: this got long so I'm gonna cut some parts and make some bullet points instead

When I was 8 I chose who to have a crush on

When I was 12 I joined a very gay fandom and shipped gay people (helped me stopped being homophobic)

"But I wasn't gay"

When I was like 13 every day on the bus I was thinking of this one girl

And I was like I can't be gay

And I had a whole list on my brain of why "I wasn't allowed to be gay"

Till a friend of mine came out as bi when we were like 13-14, and I realized that if they're allowed to just be Then There's no invisible wall forbidding me

And I did too, I came out to a few people as bi

When I was 12 I had a crush on a boy, once my friend pretended to like him to see my reaction(cause it was my 1st crush while they had a different one every week) and I had deleted my feelings after a 45 minutes class, but she just told me it was a joke but, I already like, felt nothing?

I've had a couple of crushes over the years, it actually takes me a long time to figure out "Oh hey this might be a crush" and most of my crushes, they were just random people from school, that I've never talked to and I didn't actually wanted to? Like that's my crush ok. End of story, no biggie

I only had a crush on a friend once, and I never told anyone about it. This was like when I was 15, and I recently (im 17 now) found out they have an online gf and I didn't felt any kind of jealously one might expect to feel, I'm happy for them

The thing with my crushes is, fictional characters? I usually love the boys, real people? Usually Girls that look gay

I think what mostly makes me question whether I'm fully bi, is that I related a little too much to Georgia Warr from Loveless by Alice Oseman (for anyone that doesn't know the book is about Georgia figuring out her identity as aroace)

One of my main suspicions is a photo, it was from an actor I really liked a few years ago, he was shirtless and all the comments were like "😍😍🔥🔥🥵🤩hot" and the first time I saw it I was like yeah, but then I saw the same photo a week later and I was like ew why is he shirtless get dressed dude, and I was confused with the same comments I saw and agreed a week ago

Also, some of the fictional characters i love I say I'm in love with them, but I don't actually want to "date" anyone (like my friends do) and 9/10 I ship the characters with someone

And I recently found out what Aceflux is

I would explain it as "on/off sexual attraction" that's how I understand it, at least. I don't know if/how much I'm wrong. I can't find a lot about it online

When I think about it, I'm not sure what I find "hot" sometimes I see someone and I'm like oh hot but not like in a "I wanna sleep with them hot"

I'm 17 and I've never been in a relationship or anything,

And while its sounds cool and all, I'm doing fine single yknow? I'm not actively looking for a relationship like most people seem to be doing

I've been questioning with the Aceflux label for a while now, it just makes sense,

Things I've done/thought in the past make more sense if an "on/off sexuality" is an option

but I feel like a fraud if I do use it and call myself that

Google is like "mostly on the asexual spectrum but sometimes allo"

What if it's a mix? What if I'm more allo than Aceflux? Or actually I'm not even sure anymore?? Idk I think I experience sexual attraction like 10 minutes a week when I see something on the internet that seems fancy

Is there a way to measure it?

Would it be unfair to use that label?

I don't even know anymore

Also, bc I've got double questions how? Romantic people? Demiromantic? How different? Like do people get Romantic feelings instantly?how? what? I don't understand

I'm questioning everything at this point

Only my gender, which I figured out at 15, seems to be safe...for now

[msookyspooky]

Hi! So What’re your thoughts on the fan theory that Stu and Billy were secret lovers' canon wise?

I mean, Matthew Lillard himself said that if they would’ve succeeded with the plan and survived, they would've fallen in love. Adopted stray dogs and slaughter people on the weekends.

They teamed up with the intent to kill their VERY HOT girlfriends (and an ex girlfriend) and were going to be the last two standing.

(Everybody dies but us!) Well Y’know what they say be gay do crime! 🔪 ⊂(•̀_•́⊂ )∘˚˳° 🏳️‍🌈

Scary movie (the parody) also hinted at it and I think I remember reading somewhere that they were based on real gay killers but I’m not sure tbh.

Babe, look at Stu...LOOK AT HIM. DOES THAT LOOK LIKE A HETERO LOOK YOU GIVE YOUR BRO IN CRIME?

OR THIS??? UM, OKAY SLUT. JUST SALIVATING OVER YOUR MAN FRIEND, BILLY???

Like ik they have sm chemistry bc they became good friends irl and u can be a lil gay with ur friends but im ngl Matt is eyeing Skeet up and down the whole movie (I mean same) and whether that was intentional or not....🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

Besides, babes, I wrote it into Set Up; they definitely explored each others bodies. It's canon in my fic bc I genuinely think SOMETHING fruity was happening there.

I have no issue with either of them being secretly gay and not liking women at all (Cause it happens! You can sleep with the opposite sex for years and be like "oh nevermind×××" sexuaility is fluid imo.) but I personally think they both were bi bc Stu loved titties way too much and was just a perv for women all together and Billy was a giant whore picking up girls left and right (The video store? Sam's Mom? Eventually Sid? Damn boy, how many others??? I will forever slut shame the slut shamer that is Billy Loomis what a lil manwhore 🤚😭) and how he handled Sid during the vague sex scene? He was into it even just for the sex with her (He probably was thinking of sadistic crap but still)

Like this?

Or Stu and tits? And Girls? He even tried to get too handsy with a girl on the porch leaving if you listen and he's like 'my bad baby! My bad!' He even admitted he had a crush on Sidney (Get in line 😒🙄)

It might even be one of those situations they were only bi for each other and I definitely think they were sexually with each other. If not full blown then at least kind of fooled around a little.

Now I seriously don't think they teamed up JUST to kill their gfs like some ppl that ship Stuilly hc. Stu was gonna kill regardless, he's just that nuts and Billy had a motive. And they're both misogynist that are attractive themselves. To Stu, Tatum was a dime a dozen. He probably cheated on her with other girls and Billy anyways, let's just be realistic here.

And Billy feels like he could care less about girls. He's attractive and girls just come to him and he uses them for release and goes. I highly doubt he was in love with Sam's Mom and her Mom was just a young naive girl in a one sided relationship with him. (But you never know! We'll never know anyways) He was so focused on his plan to even really care about all that and I think in his own fucked up way he did love Sidney but the hate outweighed the love he had for her in the beginning of their relationship. After killing her mom, the bitterness grew to the point he wanted her dead. My hc at least. (Idk how else to explain his mentality like boy ur not making sense)

And I don't think Billy and Stu loved each other in the traditional sense of the word. I ship Stuilly but it's just as fucked up as they are. I think Stu worshipped Billy to an extent bc Billy was the one that fulfilled his fantasies. Billy honestly used Stu imo. He purposely was going to use him as a scape goat if Neil failed. But I also think Billy probably did secretly like Stu as a friend and something more like love but just couldn't admit it, not even to himself.

Like I said. Fucked up. I don't think they were lovers in the secretly in love way as much as they both used and experimented with one another and it was slowly turning to the closest thing to caring either one could feel but the murder outweighed that. That's just my hc tho.

This is one of those cases it rlly is up to fan theory bc were they horny teen boys that were experiencing attraction to girls AND each other? OR were they trying so hard to prove to themselves they weren't gay? I accept anyones hc on that bc we really will never fully know.

But I still feel their bi if anything and experimented as lovers

[ravysu]

Sannin headcanons and thoughts

The last thing I would like to post for the sannin week. It is still 24.04 here! :D @sannin-central

This is long. Spoiler alert. Mostly Orochimaru, some Tsunade, a little of Jiraiya (because his story is pretty clear and spoken and idk what I can add). Also I recommend to read this meta about Orochimaru, it has influenced me a lot and has some good points. Sorry for any posible grammar mistakes. Also I really should put here a lot of references to the manga or anime but it was something that was piling up for a year and I'm soooooooo lazy. After all, those are just headcanons. Also: Im not excusing Oro's bad stuff here, Im trying to understand the reasons.

Ive already posted some hcs, here, here and here.

1. First if all, the chronology pic of sannin lifetime based on the info i found on naruto wiki and also some statements about wars from this post. It was tough considering what a mess naruto’s chronology is.

2. Sannin story shows what it cost to be a legend. They're like Team 7 but more realistic. Tsunade literally carried the war but left with nothing and developed a ptsd and have problems to just live on. Also anger control issues. I think she can be pretty bossy and stubborn which is not always nice. Jiraiya is the hero of the day but also very idealistic and can ignore some important details in the real word whether its the fight (he always injured during flashbacks maybe because each time he took too much to handle and on the one hand it's heroistic but on the other is a mistake that can lead your team to situations like in that Iwa cave) or your friends issues (I bet he saw what's going on but thought it's fine until Oro actually got red handed and left). He lives in his world and may have problems to get out to see it through someone else's shoes. As for Orochimaru, it seems like he was a normal guy for 20+ years (I mean, he didn't do crazy criminal shit and had something good in him and it was stated somewhere that it was his teammates influence. It is obvious they considered him as a friend, I don't thinks it was for nothing) but we mostly know his darkest side. Despite being a moster he is a human that have empathy and some ordinary human traits (man just decorates every bit of an environment he is in lol).

3. Tsunade was the leader of team Hiruzen.

4. Tsunade sometimes hit Jiraiya for some stupid things he did or said but never touches Orochimaru even if he did something same. Jiraiya complained about it once and almost got another hit.

5. Jiraiya had problematic parents that didn't care about him much and a lot of time he was wandering in the streets.

6. Judging by the look of Oro bangs and hair, he sometimes cut it off. A stress relief huh? And the fact that he doesn't do it now in Boruto..

7. It was shown that Tsunade and Orochimaru was acknowledged before they become a team. Maybe they did just before, or maybe some longer time before. I prefer the second option and hc that they met because both had no real friends - Orochimaru seemed weird and scary for everyone and Tsunade was Senju so everyone wanted to hang out with her but didn't really care. They weren't seen as what they were - people put the labels on them. But they didn't care about each other's labels and actually saw each other in true lights.

8. Tsunade knew it was an accident and it's not right but still she blamed Orochimaru for Nawaki's death for some time. It was something that seriously damaged their friendship and the team. Orochimaru was mad but also guilty, after all, he was responsible at least as a shinobi since Nawaki was under his watch. So he started to act cold and emotionless and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

9. Jiraiya was in Ame while Dan died.

10. The whole his orphans mission was a bit irresponsible tbh. They already fought Hanzo and as he stated the conflict between Konoha and Ame is going to an end with Konoha's win. It's weird to stay here for three years in the middle of the war while there were other lands to fight. He left his teammates for some idea. Maybe that caused another crack in their team friendship.

11. If Tsunade would have find a way to live on with her trauma and follow the will of fire and stuff it would affect Orochimaru as well just as her grief affected him. It's like he would get an example that you can live on with this pain. So death isn't above human capability and we are not just the slaves of mortality (sounds stupid but i dont know how else to describe sorry). But as we know what he actually saw is that it broke her crucially to the point she couldnt be herself again. And so the death is above everything.

12. Oro wasn’t just acting as a cold pragmatic bitch in that cave but also tried to save Tsunade. Jiraiya knew it and that’s why he showed this sign to him like "I see what youre doing here" and that stunned Oro because he would prefer to look rather like a cold pragmatic bitch hehe

13. Just a thought. People in the village probably treated Oro as a foreigner or just wouldnt accept him because he looked so differently and had a weird attitude. That's why he sometimes didn't feel that Konoha is his home. After the wars where people were treated as means and tools, even the children, he himself developed this view on people - he dehumanized them and used as the means to his goals, just as his village did. Funny thing some people were straightly dehumanizing him too like Ibiki thought that he was a demon (tho he was a child). And he probably weren't the only one. Anyways the point is that it's logical that Orochimaru don't care about anybody but some few people, he's the product of his era. He's like Naruto that would chose the hatred way. But naruto had some good and understanding people around him and.. Orochimaru had them too, but match how Iruka treated Naruto and this Hiruzen's "I sAw tHe mAliCe in This cHiLd fRoM tHe BegGinNinG". And oro didn't even have a big ass evil fox in him. sry i hate hiruzen

ANYWAYS the moral of the story is not "go criminal if they hurt you" but always treat people like people. Waving my hand to Kant.

14. The reason why Orochimaru didn't pick some good morals to stick with through the hard times no matter what (like, idk, Jiraiya or Naruto) is because 1) I think he is/was pretty depending on people around him 2) the war fucked him and his friends up too much (Nawaki incident + Tsunade) 3) twisted addictions (though I don't think he's that sadistic, we never saw him torturing randoms just for fun, it was always some science experimental shit. He tends to get fun out of cruelty only when it's personal) that maybe developed as a way to sublimate anger and sadness caused by his parents loss (that's what they share with sasuke - unlicke naruto, they knew their parents and it's other kind of pain. Sasuke developed a revenge issue and Orochimaru - cruelty pleasure which... is kinda the same but less epic and more occasional lol).

15. Speaking of that, Orochimaru cared for Sasuke because he saw himself in him.

16. Oro hold grudges against Hiruzen for not choosing him to be Hokage not only because he was ambitious and/or egoistic, but also because Hiruzen was some kind of a father figure for him and his approval was important tho i doubt he was aware of that. He also probably could tell that Hiruzen was suspicios about him when he was a child and that led to many conflicts and was hurting as well.

17. Tsunade knew things weren't pretty with Orochimaru after the wars but she never expected them to be this bad. During the week that she was given in her arc she thought not only about how much she wants to see Nawaki and Dan again despite how wrong would it be but also was trying to bury all the good memories she had left of Orochimaru so it would be easier to kill him.

18. She poisoned Jiraiya exactly because she knew he would not let her do it. Jiraiya was always hesitant to kill and inclined to forgiveness, while Tsunade, as mentioned by Orochimaru, could be merciless (so much so that he was not surprised when Kabuto suggested that she wanted to use Jira for Edo Tensei).

19. That was one of her traits that scared Jiraiya and fascinated Orochimaru.

20. Remember how Oro grabbed Jiraiya's neck when the latter was trying to cover with hair jutsu? On the snake, in Tsnade's arc. Orochimaru could have easily kill Jiraiya by pulling the sword out of the mouth (arteries are right there) but he didn't. As well as he could kill Tsunade when she was still shaking - just aim for the neck or the heart. Instead, he just injured her lung and kicked her which is not a big deal for the kind of shinoby like her at all.. Also he helped Anko not accidentally kill herself but it would be way much profitable to let her do it. "Orochimaru has no feelings".

21. The reason he suddenly wanted to kill Tsunade instead of forcing her to heal his arms as it was planned (which is weird since it will not going to get him heals and he kinda said that he wouldn't want to kill her just minutes ago) is that not only she refused to help him (he thought he could work it out) but she also prefered the village over him (from his point of view). Out if everyone she was the closest to being able to understand him since the village caused her painful losses too but nevertheless she agreed to be on it's side.

22. He wasn't fighting her back in the end partly because he thought he deserved that. Somewhere deep inside hahah.

23. Tsunade got a fear to develop deep bonds so they probably weren't very close with Shizune (also the way she knocked her down in this hotel.. oh).

24. Orochimaru will be here when she'll die.

25. Orochimaru's eng dub to Tsunade: "I often wondered what it would be like to ring that pretty neck yours". No comments.

26. Orochimaru is either bi/pan or ace. Anything or nothing lmao

27. Hiruzen knew about at least some of the Oro’s illegal experiments and was okay just as he was okay with the Foundation all the time. Because it’s useful. Then he has discovered he went too far OR he knew everything and oro just became too inconvenient because of his methods. The way Orochimaru tells Sasuke about reasons they are well treated as the criminals is based on in his experience with Hiruzen.

28. As you may know the lyrics in Orochimaru’s music theme goes “don’t talk with the silence of the heart”. It was taken from one Indian song that also had lines like “don’t question life too much”, ”pain arose somewhere in the chest”, “don’t speak to the wounds of the heart”. Though I’m not sure 100% because I was translating it with some hindi dictionary with like zero knowledge of hindi

29. I like to think that this “silence of the heart” theme and the fact that he called his village a hidden sound village are somehow connected. The hidden sound is the possible explanation of all things waiting to be listened to but the truth is silent and you know it deep in your heart and it bothers you. The world is silent just like the life is meaningless but people can only hear. *Sigh* anyways

30. Orochimaru’s journey is the one about accepting death. When he saw Karin released her chains while was trying to get to Sasuke he understood that the death is a part of human’s strength.

Can’t wait to feel that everything I wrote is wrong or not enough or stupid and obvious lol. Anyways, it’s something that I wanted to share until I move to some other fandom.

[fairycosmos]

It's funny cos I try not to think about whether how I look/act/present makes me masculine or feminine like I'm just being? I'm only really made aware of myself when I'm around other people or whatever because obviously I'm being perceived .I don't really think I'm masculine but when I hang out with straight people they seem to think I am. I have lots of body hair that I don't shave and I don't wear makeup and I suppose the way I act sometimes makes them uncomfortable? I mostly like the way that other lgbt people react to me cos they seem to generally not project anything onto me I think? The most annoying thing tbh is being a gnc bi woman in a relationship with a man skskkssks a lot of the time straight and also other lgbt people have a lot to say about this..... Like they wonder what my bf thinks of my presentation and act like I somehow tricked him into being with me? Or like he doesn't know I'm not feminine and is being used as a beard. Idk man the perception of gender is mind boggling

hmmm it's interesting isn't it that such a personal and internal thing is so strongly controlled by other ppl projecting their world view onto you. this is why it seems so fluid and baseless to me, why it's so weird that cishet ppl are often so fixed in their gender roles when they can change so frequently from perception to perception. i think theyre just convinced their answer is the right one? anyway it's what i mean when i say i wish i could just show up and be taken as i am - i also find lgbt ppl are more cognizant of this, we're good at actually minding our business in a way sooooo many other groups seem to fucking LACK lmfao. it causes sooo much internal struggle and for what. like am i inherently one thing or the other just because the common heteronormative perception would pin me as so? do they get to dictate what i am, or do it, and if i do - am i just mirroring what i've internalised from them back to them, or am i being authentic? idk! very very weird that ppl would immediately jump to asking your boyfriend what he thinks of your presentation btw and also bizarre that body hair is seen as masculine when it's just a fucking signifier of bodily maturity if anything 😭 it's so so gross im SICK. none of it makes sense. it really does baffle me because ultimately it seems to matter so so much when idk why it has to at all!!!