#idk im just like. i have a habit of acting like my feelings and what i want does not matter and im tired of doing that to myself like i’m
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man i wanted so fucking bad to actually do something for my birthday this year but i work 11-5 on my birthday and 10-4 the next day so i can’t even fucking go out On my actual birthday to celebrate cuz i gotta get up at fucking 8am the next day :/ i just want one damn year where i actually get to have a fun birthday but it’s whatever i guess. it’s finally on a saturday this year too AND we found a metal show we wanted to go to but that fucking 10-4 shift the next day makes it impossible so i guess i’ll go fuck myself just like every other goddamn year
#anyone wanna send me weed money lmao (im kidding i should have weed by next week at least :/)#idk im just like……. tired of every single year being like this#nobody likes you when youre (almost) 23 or wtvr#idk. it’s not a huge deal but it’s just kind of upsetting. spent 18 throwing up and 21 and 22 with a killer migraine. so why would 23 be#anything better or anything else#idk im just like. i have a habit of acting like my feelings and what i want does not matter and im tired of doing that to myself like i’m#tired of just completely shoving myself to the side and making myself feel like shit but its like every time i try and stop doing that shit#it just completely backfired and i end up making someone uncomfortable or pissing someone off so i just like. dont try anymore and im tired#of setting myself up to be disappointed so like if i just dont expect anything out of my birthday theres no way i’ll get disappointed :)#but of course this year i start a new job right before my fucking birthday so i don’t have time to request it off so i get scheduled on my#birthday and the day after so the one. fucking. year. i wanted to actually try and go out it’s just not gonna fucking happen#im just tired of every fucking year being like this
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google how do you politely and kindly say "bestie if you just keep refusing to talk to us and work this out we will have no choice but to end this living situation and move on"
#i just. i know their only option is to each individually return to their own mother's place#and i know their mothers are both abusive. and they could only tolerate living in their mother's houses together#but their parents have both said that only their child is allowed to move back in if they move out of our apartment. not their partner#so like. what are they planning to do here.#and we can't just ignore this until they decide they're not upset and then act as if nothing happened#god im getting so close to just lying and pretending i did do what they're mad at us for so this stops#but i didnt and i dont even really understand what they're accusing us of so idk how to apologize#bc i thought they were mad bc they thought we stole something but ig according to my hgf#gf*#who is the one they texted in the first place#they're mad bc they think we used something in their medicine cabinet without asking and then just left it on the counter#and they specifically said 'i know it was one of you because me and my partner are in the habit of putting things back where they go'#and we didn't want to fucking shade their partner but like. they in fact are not in the habit of putting things back where they go#and the thing they accused us of is stealing their fucking vaporub and their partner is the only one of us sick rn!#so idk wtf is going on but i am actually so so sad about this#these are like my only friends in the world and it feels so fucking awful to have them be mad at me#and there seems to be nothing i can do to even attempt to fix it and that feels even worse#and idk how im gonna feel if its somehow revealed that one of our roommates is blaming stuff on us to their partner#i just. idk man i would never fucking do that#it just really makes me feel like they never really cared about us that much to begin with for this to be our current situation#so yea. i guess if they're just not willing to work on this at all i will be moving in a month or two
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✦ SOMETHING LIKE THIS | eddie m. x reader ✦
wc: 6.3k+
pairing: eddie munson x f!reader
warnings: nothing rlly, partying, drinking, kissing, fluffy fluff, angsty if u squint!, high mention?, drinking games!!, truth or dare bc im such a cliche <3
summary: a truth or dare game with eddie reveals some truths between the two of you.
authors note: omg i feel like i haven't posted in forever and this so LONGG and if u can guess which show i was heavily inspired by when i wrote the closet scene i will give u thousand of kisses. as usual i kinda hate this and the ending but this took forever to write and idk i just love friends to lovers eddie SOO MUCH. this is proofread but i only read it once so pls ignore any mistakes !! also if u guys enjoyed this pls LEAVE FEEDBACK, come talk to me in asks, requests r open!! ily all sm, mwah, em!
You scoffed as you made your way past the drunken slimy bodies, pushing everyone out of the way until you finally made it into the kitchen, having no idea how Steve had managed to throw a bash this crowded and your head was spinning too much to care now.
Stumbling a bit your feet picked you up toward the drink stand, shaking the empty bottles, you sighed. "Really? All of them?" you huffed annoyed as you turned around, spotting Robin with a bottle in her hand, you smirked.
"Robin! You are my hero." You giggled as you approached her, grabbing the bottle despite her protests as you chugged a huge sip, your face contorting at the taste.
"Jesus, slow down! You're going to get black out drunk again and then complain all day tomorrow." Nancy came up behind Robin as she scoffed, this is what you had been doing all week, and Nancy was starting to get worried but you rolled your eyes at her, while Robin gave her a 'don't say that' look.
"C'mon Nance, let her be. She's got enough on her plate as it is!" Robin made a suggestive look as you took another sip, turning to face her.
Nancy pursed her lips as she shrugged. "And what does that mean?" You asked, knitting your brows together. Robin pointed towards Eddie, and your eyes followed.
He was chugging the beer he had a firm grip on, face contorting as he took more and more sips, your heart dropped to your stomach at the sight, you knew he would be here, yet you couldn't help the tingles that overtook your body when you saw him.
You were so stupid.
"I don't know what you mean." You shrugged your shoulders, lying through your teeth, Eddie had been sort of avoiding you for some time, and now, for a whole week, he was acting as if you didn't exist.
You didn't know why or how, but it was eating away at you.
Spending your days drinking and smoking away your feelings had become a regular habit ever since he had started avoiding you, and Nancy and Robin had started to get worried about your current coping mechanism.
To say you were feeling hurt would be an understatement, you and Eddie were supposed to be friends, best friends even, in the last four years, you had grown close to him, so close that being away from him even for a second hurt.
And now this distance, his cold attitude, not returning any of your calls, and eventually pretending as if you didn't exist, was eating at you, your own insecurities were bubbling up at the surface.
What was so wrong with you that Eddie couldn't even tell it to your face?
"I mean, it is weird, I've never seen the two of you apart for an hour, let alone a week." Robin spoke up, mentally cursing herself for not being able to stop blabbering and Nancy gave her a look, one that meant, 'not the fucking time' and you narrowed your eyes, hurt twinging in your chest.
"Shutting up now?" Robin asked awkwardly, shrugging her shoulders in defense, "I hope." You replied, trying to hide the hurt in your tone.
Your eyes searched for Eddie again, he was now conversing with Argyle and Jonathan, he looked uncomfortable, he could feel your gaze on him and he was doing everything in his willpower to not meet your disappointed eyes, he knew he would soften up the second he saw you.
"I think I have a plan." Nancy muttered to Robin behind you as they quickly left your side, you were too busy to notice anything as you leaned on the wall chugging the bottle again, face feeling numb.
You meant to talk to him, ask him why he was avoiding you, but you were afraid of his answer, what if Eddie didn't want to be your friend anymore?
What if Eddie was going to tell you how much he started hating you and that he never wanted to see your face again?
You would much prefer the distance rather than be shunned by him. You doubted you could handle anything without him by your side.
You knew what you felt for him was far beyond friendship now, but you never could fully admit to it.
For months, Nancy and Robin had been trying to get you to admit to it, but you had always refused, saying the two of you were 'just friends.'
But you knew, and they knew that people who were 'just friends', didn't do what you two did, friends didn't have movie nights where they ended up cuddling each other and falling asleep in each other's arms, sometimes, Eddie would even place a kiss on your forehead when you fell asleep, tucking you in as a grin took over his lips, seeing how peaceful you were.
Friends didn't have dates in Eddie's van, seated in the back as the both of you ashed a joint, wasting away the night before you watched the sunset with him, his childish grin as he told you all of his stupid jokes feeling like a kick in your stomach now.
And you knew, you knew, friends didn't look at each other the same way both of you looked at one another.
So, you were nervous, nervous that you had fucked up the only good thing in your life, nervous of what he might say to you.
But this apparent nervousness was nowhere to be seen when you had drunk this much. Before you knew it, you found your two feet dragging you to his side, unable to take control of yourself, the drunk you had decided that you had enough.
You slid past the drunk bodies standing in the way of Eddie, your fingertips anxiously fiddling with the bottle, you could barely balance yourself, smushing yourself against the wall near him.
"Hi." You intended for your voice to come out soft but your words were slurred, and Eddie almost stilled when he heard it.
His heart was thudding inside of his chest, he knew you would be at Steve's party, but he never thought you would actually talk to him, not when he had been a complete asshole to you for a while now.
His gaze was avoidant, almost as avoidant as he was and your stomach was churning again, and this time it was not the alcohol.
It was all him.
"Hey." His greeting was short, your mouth had dried up, and the drunk version of you didn't have the tolerance you had for the past week.
Your eyes narrowed as you straightened yourself. "Hey? Is that all you have to fucking say?" You almost snapped, you hadn't meant to sound so sharp, the words left your mouth like word vomit, it probably wasn't fair how you spat them at him, but his coldness to you wasn't fair, either.
You knew once you brought the subject to him there was no turning back, you were afraid of the possibility of him never talking to you again but the liquid in your system gave you enough courage to do what you feared, ripping the band-aid off, and you thought maybe, maybe, ending the friendship would cause you less pain than whatever he was supposed to be doing.
"Hello?" He attempted to joke, and if you weren't this stupidly smitten over him, and maybe a bit buzzed, it wouldn't have worked, but it did. All it took for him to soften you up was a stupid joke, causing you to giggle drunkenly, as you leaned into the wall again.
"Really?" You shook your head, "That's the best you got?" You tilted your head to the side, giving him a warm smile, you couldn't help it, it was the most you had talked with him this week, and you were already putty in his hands, you hated him, and you hated the effect he had on you.
He shrugged, it was obvious he felt more comfortable, his eyes not leaving yours. "Made you laugh, didn't I?" you nodded, you didn't mean to get this soft on him this quickly, but you couldn't help it, not when he made you feel at ease this easily.
You hated and loved how everything with Eddie made you feel at ease, feeling safe with him like you could bring your guard down for once.
You huffed, mind more mellow as you eyed him. "Missed this, ya know?" Your words were slurred again, you knew it wasn't the alcohol talking, but at the same time without it, you never would have had the courage.
Eddie's eyes were glossy and riddled with remorse as they gazed into yours, you could sense it, sense that he was feeling guilty, you bit the inside of your cheek when he looked at you like that.
"What?" He asked, dumbfounded.
"Missed this-" you pointed between the two of you, "Just missed being with y-you." You couldn't help it when your words were tangled with each other again, it made you scared to admit any of this, while Eddie just gave you a sigh.
"You're drunk?" He questioned. "Again?" If you didn't know how Eddie had been treating you the past week you'd think he was worried about you, considerate even, but the way his actions changed made you doubt his sincerity.
Eddie had been aware of your new coping mechanism, his mouth felt dry when Steve told him how badly you had been taking Eddie's new demeanor.
"Mhm." You hummed, signaling to the bottle as you attempted to chug it again but Eddie shook his head, quickly taking it away from your hands. You gasped as you straightened yourself. "Rude."
"You will get shit faced and have the worst hangover, and I'm sure you'll curse us out for letting you drink that much." He raised his brows to warn you and you pouted at him like a child.
"You sound just like Nancy." You scoffed, biting back the insult you had at the tip of your tongue about how he decided to care about you now, instead settling on making him chuckle, and just with his laugh, you felt a tinge of pride swell in your chest, it was pathetic how desperate you were for him.
"No fun, I'm crossing you out." You whined as you draw an 'X' in the air, with pouty lips and soft eyes, Eddie had a foolish grin on his face when he was comfortable with you again, almost at peace with how your soul embraced his.
He felt like an asshole, and so fucking stupid for the way he acted, but it was the only thing he knew how to do: running away from his feelings.
"Come on, where the hell have you guys been, we've got some drinking games going on!" You were startled by Robin's loud voice, and as turning to face her, you heard Eddie's groans behind you.
"No way." Eddie shook his head and you threw him a puzzled look.
"No?" You furrowed your brows. "But, you love drinking games."
"Yeah, you love drinking games. Don't be a buzzkill, Munson." Robin interrupted, she shot a look at Eddie that made him confused but intrigued, and he couldn't say no when the two of you dragged him to where everyone else was gathered.
You sat down next to him and felt your hazy drunken state get worse, it was as if everything was becoming all too real.
Realizing that the conversation you just had with him meant nothing, not after he had been avoiding you for a week, and now your mind was swirled with the thoughts of what was going to happen when you two finally had 'the talk', anxiety riddling over your body again.
"What game are we playing?" You asked in an attempt to shake off your thoughts, it didn't help when Eddie's gaze landed on you and you could feel your cheeks burning with his gaze alone, causing you to chew on your bottom lip out of nervousness.
"We just played endless rounds of 'Never Have I Ever'" Nancy sighed, almost annoyed.
"Turns out Steve the King is bit of a slut." Robin semi-whispered as Steve gasped, holding his heart to be dramatic.
"Really, Robin?" He furrowed his brows. "Well, it's not my fault you hooked up with the half of—" Robin was interrupted by Eddie's groan.
"C'mon you guys let's just play whatever this is and get on with it." His voice sounded annoyed, you turned to face him, but Eddie was already avoiding your gaze again, he looked nervous, and you wanted to roll your eyes, he was being an asshole, again.
You could feel anger bubbling up inside of your chest, and Robin could feel the tension in the air. "Okayy, truth or dare it is!" Robin interrupted with a nervous giggle.
"I thought we were playing Never Have I Ever-" You were shut up by Robin's shushes.
"Yes and now we switched to Truth or Dare, keep up, sweetheart." You furrowed your brows and giggled, turning to Steve as if to ask what was wrong with Robin, but Steve put his hands up in defense, shrugging.
Something weird was going on and you couldn't put a finger on it, and to be honest, your mind was too fuzzy to figure any of it out, filled both with alcohol and the thoughts of Eddie. Robin grabbed the bottle and spun it around the circle, the anticipation of it made her fiddle in her place, and when it landed on Steve, she groaned.
"Steve! I think you should pick truth, are you a virgin? Oh wait, you are not! Let me spin it again." Robin talked so fast that even Eddie threw her a look, you were usually used to her fast-paced actions but she was giving you a whiplash now.
"Robin, what the hell are you—" Eddie's words were cut short by Robin's shriek.
"Wow! It landed on Eddie, what a surprise." Robin rubbed her hands together almost like a villain in a cartoon.
"So, truth or dare, Eddie? Oh, also you can't say truth because Steve just picked that." Robin hit her hand against her forehead in a fake manner, and you giggled again at her actions, unaware of what was coming next.
"Okaa...ay, dare?" Eddie asked unsurely, and Robin mimicked a thinking face, you had no idea what was coming next, but you doubted anything Robin would dare him to do could fix whatever was going on with Eddie.
"I dare you to..." She paused for a minute.
"Go into that closet and not come out until you and Y/N make out." Robin's words were like a slap on your face, and she had that stupid grin on her face that you wanted to wipe off.
"Excuse me?" The two of you said in unison and you were afraid to look at him now.
"I mean... a dare is a dare." Steve shrugged, and Robin nodded quickly causing you to sigh.
"You are a child, Robin." You threw her a death stare, your mind was still hazy as you began to get up, and Eddie was still where he was sitting, he twisted his rings, an action you knew he did when he was nervous.
"Well, are you just going to wait around all day?" You snapped, not knowing what came over you when you were this drunk.
"You're okay with this?" Eddie's face was almost red as he looked up at you, hating the way a nervous tingle formed in your stomach with how he looked at you.
"It's just a d—dare, let's get it over with." You meant to sound confident but your words came out as a murmur.
"This is so stupid." He scoffed as he followed you into the closet, Robin following up behind the two of you. She locked the door when the two of you entered and she sent you a smirk before she did so, making you scoff.
"I swear I'm going to kill her." You said sharply, turning your back on the door.
When you finally faced Eddie you realized how close he was standing to your face, his tall figure towering over you was enough to make your breath hitch.
"Hi." was all he muttered as he looked down on you, making you realize how much you missed the warmth of his soft gaze and you hated yourself for how enamored you were with him.
"Hi." You managed to let out when you caught your breath, the room felt suffocating, and you could barely swallow the lump in your throat.
The possibility of him kissing you made you want to scream, both from excitement and fear.
"So... we have to kiss?" He said awkwardly, scratching his head, almost as if it were a question and you nodded quickly, knowing he was too nervous to make the first move so you had to take matters into your own hands.
"What's the big deal? It's just a kiss. We've been best friends for years, we can do it." You said, with a nonchalant tone, but the hint of nervousness was still visible.
"Let's just do it!" You announced excitedly, "kiss me, Edward Munson!" Eddie chuckled at that, making you realize how much you had missed that genuine laugh.
"Edward..." He tilted his head, "Really?" He raised a brow, causing you to pout.
"Yeah." You giggled softly, offering him a smile, knowing how much he hated someone saying his full name, he gave you a light chuckle.
“Okay, yeah, I think I deserved that." He attempted to joke, the air still tense but filled with your giggles.
"Let's do this...” Eddie added cooly, his hands at his side as he leaned towards you, licking his lips.
“Why are you licking your lips?” You questioned, making Eddie chuckle, as he stopped leaning in further.
"Should I not?" He raised a brow, "I mean do you want dry lips?” He asked sarcastically and you shook your head chuckling.
"No, no!" You protested, face burning from embarrassment. "Never mind..." You chuckled.
“I didn’t think it was—” Eddie started but you interrupted, “No.. no it’s okay.. I just..” You were a stuttering mess now.
"Let’s do it.. I—I’m ready.” His tone was soft when he spoke, he was less nervous and you nodded frantically.
You started leaning in but then abruptly stopped, making Eddie furrow his brows.
“Do you want tongue? Are you like a tonguer?” You asked, your face was serious and Eddie's eyes widened.
“Am I a what?” Eddie asked baffled as you chuckled, shaking your head.
"Fuck..." You cursed, giggles errupting in your throat from nervousness. "I didn't mean it like that, I just meant—" You were babbling, your heart hammering inside of your chest.
"I mean do you like tongue in kissing? I just— I wouldn’t wanna use tongue if you don’t want to..." You trailed off.
“Let’s just do it!” Eddie exclaimed interrupting as you let out another giggle, your nerves were getting the best of you.
“Yes, sorry. Are you ready?” You asked, weight of anticipation settling heavily in your chest as Eddie nodded, “Yes.. I’m ready.. let’s just do this..” Eddie let out slowly, scratching his head from nervousness as you nodded once again.
You barely moved when he leaned towards you, almost frozen in place you stared at him, stared at the sickly sweet brown of his eyes, stared at his dark hair that messily laid on his forehead, and you couldn't help it when your eyes lowered down to gaze at his lips, adoring the curve of his mouth.
Your gaze was stuck on him in a way that made your eyes glimmer with an array of emotions, not knowing if this would be your first and last kiss with him, trying your best to etch this sight of him into your mind forever, unsure of whether you could ever see him up this close again.
and as if Eddie could read your mind, he realized, he realized the weight of how you were staring at him. With more he studied your face, the connection between the two of you deepened, unraveling what he most wanted. You.
“Fuck— You.. you can’t do that!” He exclaimed, desperately, and you knitted your brows in confusion, “What... what did I do?” Eddie was being ridiculous now.
"Jesus Christ, you can't just do that to me." His face was burning up, he thought maybe, that this dare would be good for him, maybe the best way to get over his feelings was to kiss you for once, but the way your eyes glimmered was enough to make him want to stare at you forever, and he couldn't do that when he was trying to keep his feelings for you bottled up, forever.
Now, he was regretting the dare as he could feel the pressure building and you looked so pretty that Eddie felt his heart sink in his body, if he kissed you, he knew he couldn't contain his feelings for you no longer, he sighed, shaking his head.
“You can't do that thing with your eyes and face!” He exclaimed as you scoffed, “What the hell are you talking about?” You almost yelled, getting frustrated by his stand-offish attitude.
“Okay that’s it.. I— I can’t do it!” He huffed as he reached for the doorknob, struggling with it.
“Let me out guys!” Eddie yelled but Robin just chuckled, “You have to kiss her, you idiot!”
“Let me out of here, Robin!” He yelled louder this time, but instead of Robin answering this time Steve, Nancy, Argyle, Jonathan, and the gathered crowd answered to him, chanting “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” and Eddie rolled his eyes, cursing.
“Oh come on Eddie, let’s just do this! Just one kiss!” You said annoyed, and you felt a bit rejected at how much he wanted to leave.
Eddie turned around to meet your gaze, “No, I’m not gonna fucking kiss you.” His words were bitter and you bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from crying in front of him.
“Eddie we've been best friends for four years! A little kiss isn’t gonna change anything.” The words that left your mouth stung him, it wasn't easy on you but the emphasis on the two of you being best friends and how a kiss wouldn't change a thing between the two of you was the exact reason he was avoiding you.
Eddie knew if you had rejected him, and told him that you didn't reciprocate his feelings, it would eventually lead to the two of you not being friends.
And he couldn't handle that idea, he couldn't handle not being around you. That's why he tried to stay away from you, just so he could contain his feelings for you, at least for a while.
His gaze on you was agonizing, “Stop looking at me like that.” He muttered as you rolled your eyes, and crossed your arms around your chest, annoyed.
“God, will you just kiss me already!” You blurted out, now getting annoyed with him, not being able to comprehend why Eddie was making such a big deal out of this when it was just supposed to be a dare.
"No."
“Why not?” You questioned, eager to know why he had been acting this way, Eddie ran his hands across his hair, ruffling it before he gripped your shoulders to get your attention fully, “Because..." He took a deep breath as he put his trembling hands into his back pockets, he was trying to hold himself back, but he couldn't, not when you looked at him that way.
"Because I don't want to kiss you like this!” He almost snapped, his feelings taking over before his logic could, and you went rigid with his words.
His own reaction was delayed as his eyes widened at his own words, and he was standing close to you, so close, that your breath hitched when he said that. “What.. what does that mean?” Your head was spinning as Eddie looked down, almost as if he was embarrassed.
“Nothing! I didn’t— I just... That’s not what I fucking meant..” Eddie stuttered over his words, he felt like his desperation had trickled into the very air he was breathing in, his own words suffocating him and your gaze mocking him, he couldn't handle it further as people outside the closet started chanting “Kiss! Kiss!” again.
Eddie scoffed again, “Shit— just, excuse me..” He cursed out as he tried the doorknob again.
“What are you doing?” You asked curiously, you wanted to talk to him now.
“Just need some air” He murmured and tried the door again.
“Robin, just open up!” Eddie yelled out making Robin groan, “Did you kiss her?” Eddie rolled his eyes, and he got ready to curse Robin out but you placed your hands over his mouth, shushing him.
“Yes, yes Robin! We fucking did, we even french kissed! You happy?” You yelled out as Robin giddily chuckled unlocking the door.
You threw her a dead stare as Eddie just brushed past her, hurrying his way out and you followed quickly behind him.
"Eddie, just wait!" You called out after him, you were curious to know what he meant, why he was acting this way, none of it was making sense to you and you were still very buzzed.
"Just leave me the fuck alone, Y/N." He didn't even turn around to face you and it hurt.
"No! I'm not going to fucking run away this time." You yelled, catching up to him, and Eddie turned around swiftly.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, his tone curious and not annoyed like before.
"I'm not playing your stupid game anymore, I don't care if you tell me you hate me, Eddie, just tell me what's wrong, tell me what I did to make you push me away this much. You can insult me and tell me to 'fucking leave' but I won't leave until you tell me to my face what I did to make you push me away, you fucking coward!" You spat out the words, rolling your shoulders as you felt your anger coming out to the surface.
Eddie rubbed his hands against his face, you were asking for him to be vulnerable, and he knew that if he opened up to you, you would probably laugh in his face.
"I just—" He scoffed, "I don't wanna do this. Not right now." He sighed, and he drooped his head, his gaze fixated on the ground now.
"Just tell me what the fuck is wrong, Eddie." You almost yelled, feeling your face hot with anger. "What did you mean by when you said you didn't want to kiss me like this?"
"And why have you been avoiding me, why can't you even look me in the fucking eye right now?" To say you were frustrated would be an understatement, liquid courage had worked a little too well and you were pouring your gut out to him.
You crossed your arms against your chest, feeling your cheeks burning up with anger, you were filled with fury, and nothing Eddie could do was going to change that.
In fact, it made it worse when he kept avoiding his gaze. "Fuck you." You spat out, index finger pointed towards him, hostility written all over your face, your feet picked you up before your mind realized, and you brushed past him as you angrily left his side.
"Just— fucking wait!" His words rang in your ears but you didn't care, you kept walking while Eddie was right behind you.
"Let me just explain!" He yelled out after you. "Jesus— you're fucking fast." He added as he tried to catch up to you.
You stopped in your tracks, and your back was turned to him. "Eddie, just get it over with." You crossed your arms against your chest again, feeling your insides twist as you waited for him to pull the band-aid off.
"What?" He raised his brows in confusion, and you didn't dare to look at him.
"You realized it, didn't you? I mean it took me a while to realize it myself." Your voice was timid, not trusting yourself enough that you wouldn't break down completely in front of him.
"And you realized you didn't reciprocate them, and you're trying to let me off easy by avoiding me." You could feel tears prickling your eyes but you shook your head to make them go away.
"I know you hate confrontation." Your voice was cracking now, and Eddie hated it, he hated being the reason you were about to cry, he hated being the reason you doubted yourself because of him.
"What are you talking about? Reciprocating what?" He didn't dare to turn you to face him, he was still shocked at the possibility of what you were hinting at.
"Feelings, Eddie. My fucking feelings for you!" You turned around to face him now, and his eyes had softened, he blinked slowly to process what you were saying. The air between the two of you was filled with unspoken emotions, your body ridden with anticipation and anxiety.
But Eddie felt stupid, so fucking stupid. He spent this whole week bottling up his feelings for you, and avoiding you to do so because he thought he wasn't good enough for you, he thought you would actually mock him.
He should've known you would never do that, he should've told the insecure voice in his head to shut the fuck up.
Because there you were in front of him, saying exactly what he was feeling, and he felt like the biggest idiot in the world.
"Your... what?" His eyebrows furrowed, and he wanted to laugh, he wanted to laugh at how stupid he was being.
"Just— let's just pretend this never happened." You could barely look at him, nervously fiddling with your fingers.
"Nope." He shook his head.
There was no fucking way he would pretend this had never happened, he had been waiting, for years to tell you how he felt, every night he would give himself a pep talk, encouraging himself to finally open up to you, but when he finally saw you in the morning, and you gave him that warm smile and those doe-eyes, he always backed out, scared of losing you forever.
"No fucking way." He shook his head, and a chuckle escaped his lips.
The look you threw him was filled with disdain, "Oh, so this is funny to you?" You were quick to judge him, turning around and muttering curse words as your feet began to pick up again.
"Jesus Christ, will you let me speak!" He yelled out again and you shook your head, walking faster. Eddie scoffed, "So. Fucking. Stubborn." He muttered under his breath.
He caught up to you once again and this time he reached out to your free hand, and he grabbed it in a tight firm, spinning you around to face him, you were about to cuss him out again, and throw him a death glare, but his gaze was so gentle that you couldn't help it, your eyes were mellow, sickly sweet, as they met his.
Your heart reacted before you could, thumping in your chest. Eddie was leaning so close towards you that you sensed his heavy breathing against your face, you didn't dare to move, not until his tender fingertips brushed against your cheeks, he leaned over so agonizingly slow that you couldn't help but close the gap between the two of you, soft lips clashing with each other as you whimpered the second your mouth met his.
Eddie's chest fizzled with warmness, the smell of your perfume mixed with alcohol dizzying him while your head was still pounding as you were trying to process what was happening, there wasn't enough air in the world for your lungs to pull in.
You deepened the kiss when Eddie's hands slowly cupped your cheeks, parting your lips as his tongue explored yours, shuddering at his touch.
Your brain didn't process any of it, not until the initial shock wore off, that's when you pulled back slightly, catching your breath as you blinked confusedly at him, unable to find the words to speak.
Eddie licked his lips as they twitched to form a smile, speaking up before you could. “In the closet.. when. I said I didn’t wanna kiss you like that... I meant that I wanted something like this..” He gave you a slight chuckle as you returned it with a warm smile.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted." He gulped, feeling guilty for his actions in the past weeks, but he always poorly reacted to things that involved his feelings.
"I thought if I just stayed away from you, if I just pushed you away for a while, I could bottle up my feelings for you and—"
"You have feelings for me?" You asked, interrupting, eyes widening despite the kiss being undeniable proof of that but you still couldn't believe it, you still couldn't believe that the man you had been in love with was actually reciprocating the feelings you harbored, the feelings you tried so hard to contain inside of you.
"Are you kidding? Of course, I do." Eddie affirmed. "I mean how could I not?" He chuckled, pointing towards you. "Jesus, you're so beautiful, so fucking pretty..." he flashed you a mischievous smile.
"You're nice, and god, so fucking kind that it makes me sick sometimes. And shit— you get along with Wayne so well, I think he thinks of you more as his kid than me at this point." You gave him a light chuckle.
"Also... you are funny sometimes too." He added, giving you a light nudge with his shoulder as you pointed towards yourself mouthing 'Little old me?' sarcastically, making him smile.
"Fuck— if it wasn't for you, I'd be so lost, sweetheart. I'm so glad you came into my life." Your heart warmed at his words, gaze softening as your lips twitched into a smile.
"And you're always fucking there for me... even when I don't deserve it." He nervously fiddled with his fingers, he didn't deserve someone as perfect as you.
"Like right now, even though I've been an asshole, avoiding you, and even more of an asshole in the closet, you still came after me." He looked down, embarrassed that he had pushed you away, he knew you deserved better, so much better.
"You didn't deserve any of it, you just deserve every fucking good thing there is, and I'm just none of those things." You shook your head, opening your mouth to speak but Eddie didn't let you.
"Can you even picture it? You and me together? You— god, you are so fucking perfect." Your heart pounded against your chest, the rhythm of it erratic and suffocating because of his painful words, if only he knew how much you loved him.
"I'm just me, Eddie. I'm fucked up, a 'freak', a fucking drug dealer." Deep lines etched his forehead, he chuckled bitterly, and your heart throbbed at him describing himself as anything but good.
"I guess I just decided I wasn't good enough for you. Fuck— I chickened out." He eyed you nervously, and what he didn't expect was you slapping him on the shoulder, harshly.
"Ow!" He yelped, "Eddie never, ever make decisions on my part ever again." You chided him and he nodded quickly, "Jesus, that hurt."
"Good, because I also don't allow you to speak that way about yourself either, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me Eddie and I mean it. You're not fucked up." You affirmed him.
"God, you really are the best thing that has ever happened to me, Eddie. I don't think I've ever been happier, or more comfortable with anyone but you, you helped me realize so much about myself and have been there with me through everything." You didn't blink once, and Eddie's mouth was agape, he couldn't believe that someone —and not just anyone, you— saw him as anything more than a fuck up.
"I love you, Eddie, and I mean it, I love you so fucking much." You added, your eyes glimmering. "I can't stop thinking about you, ever... and it physically hurt being away from you for just one fucking week."
"I'm sorry for that..." He muttered again, embarrassed. "I love you so fucking much, honey. And I promise I'll never do something as dumb as this again." He gave you a warm smile, and his fingertips were gentle as they grazed over your cheeks.
You tilted your head in hesitation, "Yeah, I doubt it." You giggled, and Eddie squished your cheeks in response.
"God, you're so lucky that you're so pretty and so lucky that I fucked up big time because I will agree with you on whatever you say for the next few days." Eddie's lips formed a smirk and you raised a brow, "I'm thinking for the next month." You pursed your lips sarcastically.
Eddie chuckled and leaned in once again to kiss you, "Whatever my pretty girl wants." He murmured into your lips.
You whimpered again when your lips touched, both of you groaned when you were interrupted by Nancy's voice.
"See, I told you it would work!" Nancy pointed towards to two of you kissing as Robin and Steve almost gasped.
Robin turned to Nancy crossing her arms against her chest all-knowingly, "Yeah but it wasn't working a minute ago when they were yelling at each oth-" Robin's words were cut short by the glare Eddie and you threw at Robin.
"Sorry!" She yelled out, giving a sheepish smile, making you laugh.
"So, this was all you?" You asked, pointing towards Nancy, but before she could answer Robin scoffed.
"As if I didn't put your stubborn asses in that closet!" She mocked. The puzzle pieces of Robin acting weird all night coming to you and Eddie at the same time.
"You guys are all idiots." Eddie huffed, but his smile never faltered, and the three of them knew that was his way of gratitude.
You turned towards them with a sheepish smile on your face mouthing a 'thank you' to Robin and Nancy, and giving Steve a thumbs up, they waved you off as if to say 'No problem', and you turned to Eddie again.
"Eventful night, huh?" He asked, a smirk playing on his lips, and you gave him a playful nudge. "Shut up."
"So... you ready to go home?" Eddie asked as he threw an arm around your shoulder, you nodded, melting into his comfortable hold.
"Mhmm." You hummed, as he pressed a kiss on your hair. "I love you, pretty girl." He murmured.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fics#eddie munson oneshot#eddie munson angst#eddie munson fluff#friends to lovers
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↬ two paths 一 ⦁ nagi.s, reo.m
▶︎ sooooooooooooo... this is some rotting dabble i abandoned, and since Im kind of desperate for any glimpse of motivation, i finished it. and surprise, surprise! its a reo and nagi fic lmaolmao.
▶︎ summary: reo have had a crush on you for a good long two years, and when it's the time to word his love to you, but a obstruct of your part says otherwise. ▶︎ context: nagi is your childhood friend, jealousy, idk if this counts as a love triangle? it's more like your a brick head, some angst (ofc) kind of a plottwist !!gn reader!!
"i like you, I've liked you ever since you stepped into my world, i like everything about you, your smile, your eyes, your gentle hands, your laugh, and most of all your soul that kept me hostage. and i-"
the hang up sound cut him off.
silence fell upon the other side of the phone, only the stillness of the disconnected tone nudging him back to reality. his hold on the phone was a robust one, so stout to the point of a crack to echo. the compound of bitterness, remorse, frustration, all were hefty on the little pinning heart of his.
and with that, you rejected reo, without even saying a word.
and the next days were nothing but a grievous duration, to him the most. as much as reo didn't want to see you for a while, there was no escaping you when you were in the same school, classroom, 一hell, even club. you were in every corner and every ditch, and he'll be a dead lier if he said that your appearance alone wouldn't tiptoe on his heartstrings. reo can stay still ever so firmly and yet you'd still be able to prod him out of his ground as convenient.
reo wanted to be mad at you, to hate you even, but he couldn't, he sincerely couldn't. even when the strain was tense, unbearable, but somehow it also felt pitifully suffocated, graciously. it was you after all, where he felt like a fragile creature under your spell, gosh一 you had reo warped around your finger with cement.
nevertheless, what drove him to the edge was how you operated it. while reo handled it by immersing himself in two blankets and eat ice cream to pacified him to crying himself to sleep. however, you on the other hand was having the time of your life. greeting him good morning to saying goodbyes, even asking him how his day went, did his confession meant that little to you?
reo wondered if you bat an eye, you just denied him after all, but some acknowledgment would've been great. or at least have a talk about it. but instead you acted like it never even happened. the idea of you skipping over his feelings made him sick to his core, it sounded so ill-suited, you above all if not the most considerate, thoughtful person he'd ever met. that's how reo fell for you in the first place.
he wasn't gonna apologies for being selfish, he wanted you to himself. reo kept all his feelings for you bottled up for a good old two years, and he just cannot bare with the fear of someone else stealing you anymore 一something that kept him on trails of restless nights一
maybe that's what herd him away from you, the decedent between the two grew by each day. yet reo loved you too much to live with the consequences of his actions, he can't even look at you without screaming 'why don't you care as much as i do', your sudden unfamiliarity stings him slowly and most of all painfully.
for you to blow him away like a dust that burdens your clothes felt it was caused by a clone, or did he just never knew you like he thought he did?
it ached to see you asking him if he's okay, if you did something wrong to drive him away. and goddamn it hurts seeing you like this, he would rather bang his head to the wall repeatedly than see that anguished expression ever again, and worst of all, reo was the reason for it.
you were heavy on his mind 一as if you weren't already一 the recollection of you standing with your sweaty palms rubbing against each other, a bad habit you do when you get uneasy, he really fucked up to the point where you have became a nervous wreck in his presence. your utter was light, questioning if he even wanted to be your 'friend' anymore.
you weren't the one to blame, reo was the one who stopped talking to you, stopped sitting with you for lunch, he even withdrew the club you two shared 一he didn't even have a liking for it, just joined because you were there一 all that and you still tugged on the last tie of faith reo would walk back into your life with open arms.
but reo didn't want to be your 'friend', not anymore. he wanted to be the one to protect you, to understand you, he wanted to be your man, your other half more anything, for him to be your everything just like you are his. you can't just make heaven a living place on earth then walk away when he was on knees for you.
he left you at halt, saying that he needed some time. you never knew time for what because he walked away before letting you word anything out. so now, his hands buried deep in his pockets, he felt heavy, mind and heart on a race track. he felt awful, the image of you standing in confusion, lost on what to do will hunt him to his grave. he tried running his fingers throughout his violet lockes, he was petty, selfish, and reo knew he could've worded it better instead of this.
from the corner of his eye, he could spot a bunch of flowers fluttering under the rush of air, hit by the sunlight to outshine any other plants besides. he could've think of how beautiful they looked, but no, the first thing that popped out his mind was the image of how bliss you'll be seeing them flourish just the way you liked it.
reo contemplating his actions, the pure, straightforward out of his heart gates confession and how far it had driven him. how beyond it had tossed what you two had. something blended with bittersweetness squeezed within his chest, envisioning of your smile made it a challenge to breathe.
so he keeps on strolling, trying to straighten himself until a familiar tall white headed form comes to his view. ranking ahead of a vending machine, nagi was too busy searching for what it appears to be a coin to even notice reo.
nagi was your friend, the one who watched the two of you downfall in silence. he didn't say a thing about it, didn't get involved and much rather concentrate on his phone-games. but there was something else, nagi have been your friend for what reo have been told since childhood. it was something anyone can figure out in the first glance, nagi doesn't leave your side for what it seems like eternally, he remained as your sidekick for decades. he witnessed all your phases, your growth. and he wasn't planning on departure his spot. it was a rare sight to see nagi not glued to your side, did the sky spare him? did his desperation reaches the empyrean?
"hey," reo announced his presence, nagi's bored eyes soaring over him. so the purple head flipped a coin to his direction, nagi tamed it halfway, staring at the single coin then back at his friend. "need another one." he uttered flatly as ever, so reo push out a sigh as he tossed him another one. the snowy head mummers a low thanks.
"listen, i need to tell you something." reo enunciates after a moment of hesitation, caressing the back of his neck as his lilac hues kept on swirling around. his friend just humming in acknowledgment, supporting his chin with his hand while still examining over the endless optionals of drinks.
"it's about yn."
nagi rattled momentarily, your name was like a cold water on his senses.
well, that was easy. reo thought. "i did something a few weeks ago, and i think i fucked up everything." he says, undertone. as if he was admitting an unforgivable crime.
"what did you do?" there was something off about nagi's tone, his grip on the coins was merciless. but his face still seemed boarded, nonchalantly but oddly firmed for some reason.
"i kind of admitted my feelings to them..."
nagi's daze expression shattered in an instant, not anything crazy, but his eyes grew obscure, casing over reo like a giant blacked cloud.
for nagi to carry that kind of aura was eccentric, that face would only arise every time an unnamed got a little too close to you. at that time, reo convinced himself that he was imagining that, because nagi out of all people stood his ground when it comes to dating, he'd always say the same thing 'dating sounds like a hassle'. and sometimes something wild like 'don't need someone else around, I already have yn.' reo wasn't a backstabber, he only confessed to you because he lived under the roof that his friend wasn't even able to handle anything intrigued with romance.
"i just, been liking them for ages. and i found the strength to finally say it to them, they-"
"hung up on you." the snowy head finished his line, which made reo eyes widen a bit.
he shifted awkwardly, "haha, did they tell you? how embarrassing.." he tried laughing it off, trying to avoid nagi's gaze for his sake.
"they didn't." nagi spoke quickly, voice strained than usual.
"oh? so how did you?.."
"because i did it. i was the one who hanged up."
there was a moment of lull, where not even the waves of wind could sooth over the tension. reo stood still, waiting for nagi to stick out his tongue playfully and shout 'gotcha!', praying for whoever might've fell upon to this to be a sick prank.
"you what?" he doesn't even realize he spoke before the words had already slipped.
nagi sigh tiredly, his fingers still at halt to press the numbers of his wanted drink, he didn't like focusing on two thing at the same time. "i thought you'd figure it out already. man, do i have to explain myself now? what a hassle." he let out softly.
"nagi, you-"
reo doesn't get get the chance to speak, to think, before nagi cut him off swiftly handling the conversation, like he knew this was coming. "listen, reo. i like being your friend, but i can't let you have yn." his words kept hurtling reo, it all poured down at his like a sucker punch.
"i don't understand."
"it's not that hard, i liked them first, i found them first. so they're basically mine."
oh, oh.
it all made sense now. reo felt like an idiot, why is he seeing this now? this is why you were clueless, because you didn't answer it in the first place. why, why was he so rushed to say it and not letting what he thought was you speak first.
every time when nagi would drink from the same bottle of yours, when he would twirl around a piece of your hair randomly, when his head would rest on your shoulder in every ride home, when he would shut down every time reo rambled about you, he just got it. why was he just connecting the puzzle? was his feelings for you so blinding that he couldn't see this?
reo wanted to say something, in fact things. but the lump in his throat clogs his attempts to protests. leaving his mouth agape.
and it was like nagi couldn't get a hold of concern about this, in fact he found waiting for his drinks to make it way down more interesting. yet he sensed a blazing breeze from his friend's direction, it was hard not to when they were on the same burden as an elephant. so the snowy head swiftly retorted, "plus, you already are the standard, right? I'm pretty sure you can find someone else, it'll be better if you found one quicker."
after that, nagi bent over to grab what was supposed to be his lemon tea alongside your favourite one. boredom eyes doubled-dyed at the cans, mostly at yours before blowing out a vague breath一did he just scoff?
"why you.."
"sorry, don't like sharing."
and with that, nagi walked away. head empty with the only maintenance thing was a picture of you as he handed you your favourite flavour with the money that wasn't even his. leaving reo dumbfounding at his back, he didn't get a say on this, like this wasn't even meant for him.
this wasn't a stage he can purchase to himself, not even to earn a role. he felt like a third-wheel in you and nagi's love tale.
it loathes him, brings him to edge even. but most of all, reo now wanted you more than anything.
#bllk x reader#blue lock x reader#nagi x reader#reo x reader#reo mikage x reader#nagi seishiro x reader
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My first wip wednesday
omg im so excited to be tagged for this. ty @joelmillerisapunk lettuce see what's cooking. ch 2 of smooth operator and my first ever javi fic - dbf javi one shot dbf!javi x reader
“You’ve got no idea what you’re doing to me, do you, cariño?” His voice is low and rough, like a whisper laced with danger.
Your breath hitches, your lips parting as if to answer, but nothing comes out. The intensity in his gaze keeps you pinned in place, your heart is pounding as heat blooms in your chest.
“Stealing my shirt, walking around, smelling like me,” he murmurs, stepping closer. His hand skims up your arm until it settle on your shoulder. His fingers curl into the fabric there, tugging it just enough to make you feel the weight of his hold. “Were you hoping I'd catch you? Hmm? That I’d come in here and do something about it?”
“Javi, I—”
“Don’t lie to me,” he interrupts, his tone sharp but laced with a heat that makes your knees feel weak. He leans in, his breath ghosting over your ear as he growls, “You know exactly what you’re doing, princesa.”
Your hand finds his chest, your fingers touch the bare skin just peeking out from the unbuttoned top of his shirt. He’s close now, so close you can feel the warmth radiating off of him. You can smell the faint mix of cologne and cigarettes that cling to him like a bad habit
“You want me to lose control, don’t you?” His lips brush your temple, soft and fleeting, before trailing down to the corner of your jaw. “You want me to pin you down, show you just how dangerous this game you’re playing really is.”
Smooth Operator pt 2
"I have to say, I've been thinking about you all damn day. Do you have any idea how hard it is to walk around with a near-constant boner?"
You’re already gushing down below, squeezing your thighs shut at the image he’s just given you. With a breathless laugh, you respond, "Can’t say I have, but I know what it’s like walking around with a fountain in your panties all day long."
His laugh is dark, a promise of what’s coming. "A fountain? Sounds like someone’s been thinking naughty thoughts."
"More than one, actually.
"Mm," he hums in approval. You hear a rustling in the background, like he’s getting comfortable. "Tell me one of 'em."
"Yeah, so, you're the teacher, and I'm the student." Christ, you can't believe you're actually saying this. You feel stupid and embarrassed. It's so much easier to talk about other people's fantasies than your own. "I have detention, and it's just you and me in the classroom. You're looking over the schoolwork, and since you're distracted, I decide to, you know." "Say it." The command is firm.
"I play with my pussy," you say, scraping your teeth along your bottom lip. "I slip my hand down my panties and find my clít. I pinch it and rub it, holding back my moans because I don’t want you to hear." Your eyes fall shut without you realizing, and your hands wander down your body, acting out the fantasy. You’re already wet—you know that—but what surprises you is just how wet you are. You feel it on your thighs, soaking into the sheets.
"Fuck," he drawls, drawing the word out. "You think you're bein' quiet, but you're not, Princess. And your pussy is so fucking wet I can smell it from my desk."
npt and sorry if you're tagged and I missed it. idk who to tag lol still figuring this whole thing out: @sanarsi @pedgito @elflutter @baronessvonglitter @joelsrose
@slowdivinqs @gothcsz @slimybeth69 @80ssong @magpiepills
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helloooo !!! can i have hanni gf hcs? thank you
💭 — HANNI AS YOUR GIRLFRIEND !
SOPH — hihi ofc!! tysm for requesting :) <3 this is SOOO overdue but im starting to work on my requests again <3 im sorry if this is a bit short, i haven’t been motivated recently but i tried! anyways smth for my bae hanni <3
WARNINGS — use of petnames (bae/babe)
— the person who you could just be honest with and talk about everything and ANYTHING. like we’ve seen her on that debate episode, bae was PREPARED! so i think she’d be also that talkative with you!
— i would say she’s touchy? like she loves physical touch, it’s one of her love languages. so when she’s by you, be shocked if she doesn’t start cuddling you or resting a body part on you LMAO 😭😭😭
— seems like someone who would do playful childish teasing. LIKE sticking tongue out or be like “ooouuuu” YKWIM? she does it for the fun of it and wanting a reaction. she’d be more than glad if you joined her <3
— forget about petnames, she’s gonna call you bro and dude all the time LMFAOOO. it’s a habit of hers and probably a habit of yours too, let’s be honest so it’s hard to stop! but if she does use one, it would probably be bae / babe bc she likes how it sounds
— idk…she seems the type to get jealous easily ? like she’d get real pouty or be overdramatic js for you to get the hint. she’d pretend to act cold after you notice but then just give in under your touch
— would make you do weird things w/ her LMFAO. like who wouldn’t want to ding dong ditch someone’s hotel room? hanni hanni hanni….
— would def hype you up! like she’d instantly scream and shout be like “ayyy, that’s my bae!”. just makes you feel so confident about yourself </3
— the type to just like tackle you HELP. like oh you’re laying down? she’s already preparing to jump on top of you.
— despite being pretty playful, i think she would be understanding. like she’s willing to hear you out and would change anything that you don’t like or whatnot.
— whenever she sees you sad, she instantly goes and check up on you. 😧 THIS EMOJI IS HER. and she would be like “what’s wrong?” as she rubs on your back.
— when one of you is stressed/sad (or both), she’d suggest taking a walk outside just to clear up your/her mind a bit. a bonus if it’s at night, since she loves taking walks at night.
— would probably try to make you laugh but end up laughing at herself before she could. but that doesn’t matter, since her laugh is contagious, it ends up with you laughing as well.
— probably loves matching stuff! i think she’d get really excited with matching necklaces, and even matching wallpapers!
— she’s just really comforting to be around, and you’ll never be bored when she’s around!
— forces you to watch movies with her. like she would get all excited when she finds a new movie to watch with you. so when she’s all giddy, who are you to refuse?? movie nights/dates are definitely your thing w/ her!
— likes taking silly pics and vids 😭 and whenever you tell her to delete it off your phone, she just goes “but you’re so cute here!” which explains why she has a whole album of you and her…(you also get a separate album of js you on her phone <3)
💭 — cool with you is literally stuck in my head
NWJNS PERM TAGLIST — @miumiuangel222
#k-labels#kflixnet#k-films#newjeans#nwjns#newjeans hanni#nwjns hanni#newjeans headcanons#newjeans scenarios#newjeans imagines#newjeans x reader#newjeans ff#newjeans fluff#nwjns headcanons#nwjns scenarios#nwjns imagines#nwjns x reader#nwjns ff#nwjns fluff#hanni headcanons#hanni scenarios#hanni imagines#hanni x reader#hanni fluff#kpop#kpop headcanons#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines#kpop x reader#kpop ff
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this is gunna sound so weird... men make my skin crawl. Like im attracted to men but everytime i see a man, my rbf awakens and i become hyper aware of my surroundings 😭
it doesn't help that im attending an all girls college now... any advice on how to ease up pls around them? I find it hard to even want to talk to them 😭 ik all men aren't bad and i may always not be in danger (imagine that in all caps and red) but i just wanna be able behave and think like a normal person around them ( this is so much that i even can't stand strangers)
Loads of luv to you ❤
honestly i hope u meet better men!!! there are some disgusting nasty perverted pieces of shit out there who dont deserve to be around women and i completely get why u would feel repulsed by them.
i wonder if u have malefic influence, they usually struggle the most with the opposite gender
tips on how to ease up around men:
think in terms of energy. dont project anger or hatred because thats what you will see in return. i know this is very triggering and difficult for many people but you HAVE to believe in good to SEE good. despite absolutely everything that ive gone thru, i still believe that people are inherently good, kind and helpful and i see proof of it everyday.
ive had men treat me with dignity, respect and kindness in the shadiest of circumstances and ive had men be nasty to me out in the open, so it just comes down to character. just think of men as people honestly and not as hound dogs about to attack u.
2. imagine them as little boys
sometimes when men are soft or boyish with me, it reminds me of how they mustve been as kids and it warms me. i have two little boy cousins who are 12 and 6 respectively and they both adooooreeee me and want to marry me when they grow up🥺🥺🥺theyre the sweetest kids on the planet and i could never ever feel otherwise, theyre my babies. idk if this is something u can relate to but think of a little boy you're close to, how innocent and silly he is and how you could never see him as a threat or hate him and understand that grown men can be like that too.
3. how we treat people has a lot to do with how people treat us
if you have a rbf and generally act standoffish and cold/distant, then you're probably perceived as being bitchy 😬😬and nevermind men, even women probably find u intimidating or hard to approach. im only saying this because learning how to navigate social situations is 90% of adulthood and the key to personal and professional success.
learn to smile more. i know women hate being told to smile but honestly we should alllll smile more. force yourself to do it until it becomes a habit. be that person who smiles at strangers. dont u feel happy when someone smiles at you??? so in turn, be that person to others!!! <33
learn to get out of your head. most people think too much. i hate spending time with people who talk about everything from a victim pov. like yes sure u/we women, are in a position of disadvantage in many ways, historically speaking but ???? this attitude?? wont get u anywhere. (I'm speaking generally and not about you particularly)
i would say the key is to turn inward and work on yourself. read all those cliche self help books about "how to influence people" yada yada,, learn social etiquette and watch all those youtube gurus who teach soft skills. forget about men and hating them for a second and just focus on self improvement. as you change, youll see the world change with u.
just think of men as people basically. also idk if youre familiar with carl jung but i feel like you have a wounded animus. many women who grew up with an absent (emotionally or otherwise) father grow up to project all that onto men. and in turn have damaging relationships with men!!
im not a man defender and im in no way saying all men are good but i genuinely dont think its healthy to hate, thats all!!
idk if any of this is helpful sikeee but lmk if u have any updates
also lots of love to u too angel!!<3
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Just saw Han’s star nails and idk why but I can imagine him letting you paint his nails and he can’t help but coo at how concentrated you are and he’s just admiring how excited you are trying out a new design 🥺
lazy days and painted nails
FLUFF BELOW CUT – MINORS, AGELESS & DEFAULT BLOGS; DNI
warnings: gn reader, idol jisung, established relationship words: 0.5k ~ (587)
dont repost. dont translate. feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!
“baby, it's time.” jisung looks up at you from his position on the bedroom floor. lay flat on his stomach in just a white vest and grey sweats pants with a manga in front of him.
it's stray kids comeback in a few weeks and jisung is taking this time to relax for a while before things start getting hectic again. he doesn't mind things being chaotic, he likes it, keeps him busy. but he hates being away from you so he wants to spend the free time he has now with you as much as possible.
“nails?” he asks as you sit down on a pillow in front of him. you nod as you put the nail polishes, file and clippers down.
“comeback is soon and i want to do your nails.”
“ok. be my guest baby.” jisung sits up, willingly giving you his right hand. you like painting his nails just as much as he likes watching you do his nails. it's like you're with him when he is away, in a weird yet beautiful way.
“what design are you thinking off?” he asks, watching you file his nails and get rid of the dead skin and cuticles.
“something to do with stars. was thinking stars on all your fingers because y'know, five star.” you giggle.
“clever. just like the album, i love it.” your cheeks turn a soft pink colour as you open the nail polishes. you start by painting his nails, careful not to flood his cuticles or get any on his skin.
jisung watches you, smiling to himself. he reaches out with his free hand to tuck your hair behind your ear gently, which causes the tips of your ears to turn red and heart to thump like crazy against your rib cage.
“you're so beautiful, yn.”
“shh. don't make me lose focus.” you mumble.
“i can't help but speak my mind when it comes to you.” you give jisung a simple “mhm”, a sign that you're half listening. you stick your tongue out in concentration, one of the many habits jisung loves about you.
“even now you're acting so cute. with your tongue sticking out and the way your cheeks are so pink because of me.”
“ji!!” you whine, sticking out your bottom lip as you mess up one of the points of the star. “now i have to start all over again.”
“don't” jisung stops you from grabbing the remover by grabbing your hand gently. he intertwines his fingers with yours, pulling you closer to him.
you stutter. your faces are getting dangerously closer and closer to each other.
he's so close. you can see the fine detail of his textured skin. the skin on his lips, the mole on his cheek. his long lashes and cute button nose.
“you don't want me to fix it up?” you whisper, as you close your eyes.
“no.”
“but why.” jisung pulls you onto his lap gently, holding your waist. his breath fans against your lips as he leans in, tilting his head to the side.
“because it shows that someone i love has done my nails. i don't want them to look perfect, i want people to know, to see that you did my nails. it feels like you're with me.”
you whimper softly as his lips press against yours in a gentle, sweet and delicate kiss. your lips move together in sync, creating a perfect rhythm that allows you both to get lost in.
“it's imperfectly perfect and i love that.”
note: anon, we must have the same mind because i too, also thought about painting his nails and just soft bf jisung. im so soft for him, more than usual and idk anymore. f u jisung /af
tags (open): @sstarryoong ; @myprwttyhan ; @fairylouist ; @septicrebel ; @bbujiikseu ; @alyszaen ; @writerracha ; @aestheticsluut ; @xcookiemonsteer
#[ anon. ]#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#skz soft hours#skz soft thoughts#stray kids soft hours#stray kids soft thoughts#jisung#han jisung#jisung fluff#han jisung fluff#jisung x you#jisung x reader#han jisung x you#han jisung x reader#skz x you#skz x reader#stray kids x you#stray kids x reader
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Hello I have come to word vomit RGB trio thoughts and headcanons. Beware some of these will probably be nonsensical and not in order.
I think skate has the worst fashion taste out of the three. I can't say much on this though cause I also have an atrocious sense of fashion/lh
Boombox and to an extent Skate talk in 80's slang. Like radical, bodacious, hella, etc. 80's coded boombox just lives in my head rent free and i can't kick him out/silly
Their alcohol tolerance from lowest to highest goes: Skate, BB, Sling
BB and Skate crash at Slingshot's place ALL the time. At this point even Shuri and Vine are used to them just random showing up
^^continuing this I think they like to enter through anywhere but the window. Most especially Skate. BB at the very least is willing to act like a Normal person and use the door SOMETIMES. Skate however if he uses the door you'll bet that he's going in on his board. Whether or not he immediately crashes and breaks something inside is another thing/lh
Sometimes they'll just have Katy Perry Sessions with Shuriken. Like literally just listening to Katy Parry. Don't. Don't ask why I don't know either/lh
^^they have California Gurlz memorized.
If one of them does a crime none of them are snitching. If one goes down they all go down if one admits to it the other two will admit to it too. No bro left behind/silly
Sling is the smartest academically in their group and is probably the best at math. Not saying he's a prodigy im just saying BB and Skate are probably dumb as shit with math /lh+aaff
Sometimes Skate likes to record his Sick Moves™ and sometimes it would Also be in a place he proooobably shouldnt be in so Sling and BB take turns being on either camera duty or watch duty. Whether either of them are good at it is a different discussion/silly
Skate was caught stealing by the police once but BB was there and somehow he managed to trick them into believing he was Skate's lawyer and that he did not steal anything. Sling watched from the distant absolutely flabbergasted
Sling prices his menu very high and whenever someone asks he's just like "Oh yk, inflation!" and somehow it always works
they like setting fireworks off at night. Sometimes BB can't come cause he's too tired from work or something tho so
Despite Slingshot being the most academically smart in the group Boombox is the one who would hesitate when given a big shiny red button that could nuke Crossroads. Sling and Skate would see a shiny red button and go "ooo shiny" then BOOM!!!! /silly
idk if you want this but I have an au with my friend using the skins ingame (and some we made up for it hehe) where Snowboard and Rainbox were highschool best friends and they would get into shenanigans together like light theft (Rain is the distraction), parties maybe, etc andddd I love them very much
Snow in the au has canonically tried to rizz up a girl (in High School) only to bag her boyfriend AND her brother
^^The au takes place years later when Snowboard is in college (in Blackrock college cause there's no faction wars in this au) and when he comes back he finally meets Cozyshot who is Rain's roommate and erm my friend likes skateshot so I think you can tell what happens next (GAY PEOPLE) /silly
Okay im gonna stop rmabling now have a good day silly muah/p
IM GONNA RAMBLE TOO AND Oh my god ur so right on the first one.
SKATE HAS TERRIBLE FASHION SENse. I can smell it. Hes so sweaty he doesnt care ab his looks too much but bb would say "youre not going out like that
YES I AGREE. Boombox is stuck in the 80s and he doesnt want to leave. Im actually picking up these habits i wanna say rad so bad.
Skate being the lowest is the funniest shit wver bc i love bullying his ass. Did you tell i put NO EFFORT in his stupid hc reveal HEELP
I FEEL LIKE ONE DAY THEY MIGHT GET A SECRET HANGOUT PLACE… like fully furinisjed and with ac and all that fancy shit. How? Idk illegally? They probably have board games and dnd sessions with trusted friends who keep the place a hush
Bro theyre not normal they will never be normal… "GUYS HOW DID YOU GET IN" // "We lock picked your door" // "WHAT THE FUCK"
> lowkey skate would learn lock picking for fun and hed get so good at it he would be tempted to steal more stuff
>> that being said.. rob the bank?/ref
LOWKEY i feel like bb was a nerd in his younger years but grew out of it… he would probably like science facts and everyone thinks hes smart but hes not.. AND YES sling being math smart is so real teehee. Hes the expenses guy but also cant stop himself from spending more than he needs to
Skate n BB would get into so much trouble but no one can ever find them guilty in some fucking way and it makes the authorities so mad
Ironically id like to think Zuka easily catches them doing dumb shit but he doesnt care enough to report it
Sling has probably done tax evasion one or two times.. or more….
Ok cute hcs to vomit out… with ur mention of tired boombox i feel like sling and skate would immediately go to bbs place and crash not in a chaotic way but like ogghd.. ÖIKE THEY MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER BY GIVING SNACKS OR MASSAGES TO HELP HIM LOSE STRESS
Literally any time one of the RGB members get their vibes off its instantly to care land bc bcbc bc 😞😞🙁🙁😞😞😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 *sobbing crying throwing up* theyr besties 😭😭 this xan be both platonic or romantic i legit do not care i love BOTH
With that in mind i feel like whenever skate and bb crash over sling would have a few of their favorite pastries from his cafe saved in his fridge… like dog treats LMAOO
This is likge.. dog-cat-dog relationship… but all are chaotic as fuck /silly
YOUR AU SOUNDS SO SILLY PLEASE I WANT TO SEE!!!! I WANNA DRAW EVEN.
that au makes me think of sling with glasses for some reason… i need to draw so bad….!!!!;!2!
And they were roommates /ref+j
#phighting#phighting!#phighting hcs#headcanons#roblox#phighting boombox#phighting skateboard#phighting slingshot#slingshot phighting#skateboard phighting#boombox phighting#skateboard headcanons#slingshot headcanons#boombox headcanons#RGB trio#rgb#skateslingboom#boomskatesling#i still dont know what their tag is#HRLPF
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i didnt put this in the notes on the actual fic because its quite a long story, but i wanted to talk about it somewhere so ill do it here
my fic, Banter or Bullying, is based on an actual interaction i had with some of my close friends who i live with. our friend group has that dynamic where we all make fun of each other, but one person in particular seems to take the brunt of it. he gets made fun of more often and more harshly than other people seem to, despite being a lovely person (albeit with a few annoying habits, but everyone in this house has some, including me. thats just part of being human.)
basically, i was having a meltdown in my bedroom. i forget exactly what it was about, i think i was just having a bad time and something sent me over the edge. i find that distraction is the best technique to comfort me during a meltdown, so i went downstairs to see if anyone was in the living room and could take my mind off things for a bit, and this particular friend was the only one in there. he was sitting on the couch playing like. a star wars video game. it was like a military tactics simulator or something. idk, not really my thing.
i sat down next to him and he could see i was upset, so he offered to put the game away so we could talk about it but i was like no thanks can i just watch you play? so he said sure, and he let me sit with my head on his shoulder while he explained everything he was doing in the game. i didnt understand most of it, but it made me feel better just to sit with him and listen to him talk
then one of my other flatmates walked past, and she was like oh no hes trapped you in an explanation of his star wars game, blink twice if you need help, etc. and that upset me because i was like, no, i like spending time with him, hes making me feel better right now and actually being really nice to me, and you're just being mean for no reason, acting like im being held against my will or something
and i may be projecting, but i feel like spock gets treated a very similar way, especially by mccoy. it hurts my heart to see an autistic coded character be treated the same way as my friend, and the same way as a lot of neurodivergent people i know when they try to talk about their interests, or even just exist in a way that makes sense for them, and they constantly get negative comments about it.
so i wrote that fic as kind of. a way to express my affection for my friend, and also for spock. and to stick up for spock the way i did for my friend in that moment. no one deserves to feel like their friends dont care about their interests, or even that their friends dont like spending time with them.
i guess, moral of the story, if you have a friend that gets made fun of more than everyone else, make sure to check in with them every once in a while. ask if they're actually having fun when you're bantering with them or if it is hurting their feelings. and if you ever think a joke is going too far, say something. its nice to know that someone is in your corner
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I'm wondering how the progression of wx will look in odd geometry compared to canon (as in, they get together sooner? different dynamics?), and if/how the elemental magic is used in complementing each other. sorry this is super specific im just like. what about the wangxian 👀
HOT DOG. well :) let me crack my knuckles here this is gonna probably be a long answer!! i'll go bit by bit here...
to be honest, odd geometry is a huge divergence from canon. i have four fundamental things that change the story in absolutely huge ways, being:
elemental magic (obvi)
wei wuxian wasn't raised in lotus pier/as part of yunmeng jiang
wei wuxian doesn't die at the siege of the burial mounds thus isn't dead for 13/16 years and have to be resurrected
i have the sunshot campaign begin later than it does in canon. at the start of the story, all of the characters are slightly older; as in, i've aged all of wei wuxian's generation up to be closer to my age (most of them are in their early 20s) and adjusted their older siblings/the older generations accordingly (so, for example, jiang cheng is 20, wei wuxian is 20, and jiang yanli is 22)*
*so this means that classes at the cloud recesses still would have happened when everyone was 15, but the sunshot campaign just doesn't begin until jiang cheng, wei wuxian, and lan wangji are 20
which, it is so fun to play around with the implications of all that but it's also challenging. SO, how all of this impacts wangxian...
so just by virtue of what's going on here (namely wwx not being dead for over a decade) they definitely do get together sooner. since wei wuxian wasn't raised in lotus pier, he doesn't attend the classes at gusu when everyone in his generation were teens, he doesn't meet lan wangji until they're both 20 at the wen indoctrination camp (which through a series of events, wei wuxian gets roped into sneaking into attend).
as for their dynamics, there's layers to this!
because of how wei wuxian has grown up, there are two things: 1) his personality is not the exact same as it is in canon--how could it be, when he's grown up in such different circumstances?--however, his core traits are the same: he's still inventive, clever, and creative, he's still extremely compassionate and cares deeply about justice, especially for those who are disenfranchised, he still has an extremely strong (to the point of, at times, it being debilitating) sense of duty and a habit of putting others before himself, and being secretive and at times repressive about his emotions. he just doesn't act as...idk, childish? as he might in the show or the novel. he's a bit more grounded, a bit more serious.
because of that, i think it's maybe a bit easier for lan wangji to be more open with wei wuxian, or to accept his friendship sooner. they aren't such polar opposites as they seem in early in the show/in the novel.
2) there are slightly different class dynamics here that actually make a huge difference: wei wuxian didn't grow up in lotus pier and was not raised within polite cultivation society. no matter how much of an outcast madam yu made wei wuxian feel by trying to alienate him from her "real" family, he still was generally accepted by Society at large and was looked at and mostly treated with respect. he still gets called gongzi, and within yunmeng jiang called da-shixiong,--though, of course, coming from some people it can be read as sarcastic... i highly doubt wen chao was calling him wei-gongzi out of any sort of respect--and is overall accepted. of course, people still try to ostracize him for his status, but the cultivation world at large doesn't actively bully him much (and in all honesty, they don't really bully him at all while jiang fengmian was still alive) until he does something they don't like. apart from a few scenarios, wei wuxian wasn't given the disdain that you might expect the son of a servant to receive---honestly, i sort of wish class was talked about more in regards to mdzs and cql because it really does fascinate me. wei wuxian occupies such an interesting space within the cultivation world and i wish people discussed it more.
in my fic, though, since he wasn't raised within lotus pier and was never brought into the yunmeng jiang sect, he doesn't have the fallback of jiang cheng and jiang yanli being able to officially call him their brother--not yet, anyway. he doesn't have a sect leader to point to and be like, "i've been accepted by someone of experience and reown" and have the support that can come from that. he and lan wangji have been raised in very different spheres, and it changes how they interact with each other. there's an extra layer of formality that they now have to chip through. it's no longer lan wangji being extra formal towards someone of exactly equal standing towards him, there's now an extra layer that they have to reckon with. of course, wei wuxian is still lan wangji's equal in every way that matters--they are still the same age, they are still both incredibly talented with their areas of cultivation and respective fighting styles, they both have a mutual respect (and eventually love) for each other etc etc, they just don't belong to the same circles of society and this has to be dealt with.
of course, when the sunshot campaign is over and wei wuxian will have assisted the rebellion against the wens in winning, his status changes. he will be respected, if not feared, because eventually the cultivation world will figure out what he's able to do and fear it being used against them.
which brings us to their elemental magic and how that affects their dynamic as well !! AHHH!!!
so, wei wuxian can control qi (i can clarify any questions you or anyone else might have about this if needed) and lan wangji's affinity is water. at the beginning of the story, wei wuxian pretends to also have an affinity with water, and claims he heals with it--this backfires on him hard during xuanwu cave, when he has to heal lan wangji's broken leg and obviously, as someone with an affinity for water, lan wangji would know what healing someone using water is like and this is not it.
ultimately, wei wuxian is a healer. that is his favorite thing to do, it is what he prefers to do---despite having the powers he does (which, for a while, even he doesn't fully understand), and the demonic cultivation he will be able to do, he doesn't actually enjoy using his qi controlling abilities negatively on people much. he will do it if he has to, and will definitely enjoy using it to enact revenge on people who deserve it, but at the end of the day, he just wants to help and heal people.
i honestly think this suits lan wangji's temperament quite nicely--they would make a very good team, what with lan wangji's habit of going "wherever the chaos is" and helping people out with resentful spirits and night hunts.
even in the original odd geometry from 5 years ago, they were never opposing elements--though that would certainly be interesting LMAO!!!
as a reward for getting thru all of that... i shall leave you with... A SNIPPET <3
(from chapter 5, time is the movement of grief. context: this is at lotus pier, post xuanwu cave) He looked up, and saw Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian moved over on the dock to make room for him to sit, which he did, cross-legged so he wouldn’t get wet. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, listening to the crickets. The golden light of the setting sun made Lan Wangji look devastatingly beautiful. It took Wei Wuxian’s breath away. When Lan Wangji turned his head and met Wei Wuxian’s eyes, there was nothing Wei Wuxian wanted to do more than kiss him in that moment. It was a startling thought. He looked away as calmly as he could.
THANK YOU FOR ASKING COR I REALLY LOVED ANSWERING THIS!!!!!
#vero.txt#t#asks#vero ficblogging#this one has a snippet in it you guys you should open the readmore
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do you have any habit and Evan analysis to drop cause I never see people talk about them and their bond.. in my eyes habit and Evan are like a wolf and a rabbit in the way that habit has so much power, but also I feel like Evan could almost tame him.. I don’t know how to explain it and I think tumble has a limit for asks. Hope you understand what I mean.
DUDE IM SO FUCKING GLAD YOU ASKED. I have theories. I have MANY theories and thoughts about these two it makes me absolutely insane. Just like pretty much anyone else in this fandom, Evan and habit are the ones who introduced me into this series, and they were just so intriguing to me that I had to know more. Ofc my interests got stolen by a certain film student but. Evan and habit are JUST AS SPECIAL TO ME.
(The cover isn't working I'm so sorry idk what's going on 😭😭)
Now I wanna start off with what you said about Habit being a wolf and Evan being a rabbit, and I think you're VERY correct, yet I do have one thing I would like to add to this however I think it would take a VERRYY long time for Evan to "tame" habit, Habit is not something that WANTS to be tamed, he doesn't really want to be treated with gentleness. And Evan doesn't exactly want to treat habit with any gentleness or tame him at all.
The one thing about Evan is that he's the perfect toy for habit, he's the perfect one for him, his perfect fit, their souls or their lives are intertwined even if they both don't want to be.
I see their relationship more like a dog and it's favorite chew toy, the dog will bite and tug and pull, but It'll never rip it apart, and if it does, the dog will feel regret and it'll will go get it stitched back up just to go back to playing.
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Habit will however take care of this vessel, to those who think he treats it like shit???? you clearly don't understand habit at all. He needs this vessel, he wants it pristine, perfect, powerful. He will clean this body, he'll feed the body, he'll keep it in the best shape he can, all while he rots it from the inside, because no matter what, habit is a parasite taking absolutely everything from Evan.
I feel like Evan himself is alot more likely to ignore his own needs thinking it'll have some kind of damaging affect on habit, but habit will get into his head, he'll whisper in his ear about Evan needs to take care of himself, Evan needs to be strong for everyone and everything. He can't be weak, he'll be of no use to ANYONE if he's weak. Habit will tell him he'd be of no use to Vinnie if he isn't taking care of himself, and that will always get Evan going enough to do SOMETHING.
Although I think food is something that might be ruined for Evan, especially meat. He can't bite into it without being brought to tears at the idea of his teeth sinking down into human flesh again and he'll have to spit it out and scrub the taste and the blood out of his mouth. So when habit is in control, that's when he has to do the eating, habit has to be the one to nurture this body like it's his own.
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Evan is practically convinced him and habit are one, he thinks that habit is just a manifestation of his deep inner impulses the ones he'd never dream of doing but that replay in his mind over and over again. And he thinks Habit is there to force him to act on these impulses as punishment for the want he experience.
Habit however knows him and Evan aren't one and he makes sure that people know that. he could give less of a shit about the way Evan actually FEELS he just wants his body in good condition. When you're being possessed by habit, you're no longer yourself, there's NOTHING of your personality left, you are PURELY Habit. He'll change your clothes, he'll change your hair, he'll do whatever HE wants because your body is HIS. And that's exactly how it is with Evan. He owns him, Evan is BUILT for him. it's not the other way around.
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Habit will in fact feed Evan fake memories and trap him in horrific nightmares on repeat, leaving his mind weak and easy to keep in control. The more disoriented Evan is, the easier it is to take over and use his body the way he wants to.
That being said though, Habit isn't all THAT cruel to Evan, atleast earlier on the series. Earlier on he's trying to "help" him in ways. He's protective, he'll scratch at Evans brain screaming to be let out the MOMENT Evan is in danger, only to purr with delight when Evan gives in.
I take them switching in their head as like habit taking the lead in a dance, Evan is still participating, but it's not really all up to him, he's just following habits lead, taking the advice he's given. Because that's one thing Evan is REALLY good at. He's the BEST at doing what he's told. and for something like habit??? that's just how he likes it.
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I hope you enjoy these anon. I don't really view their relationship as very soft in many ways, they're nothing like Michael and Patrick, if anything habit would be offended at the assumption that he's ANYTHING like Patrick Habit is NOTHING close to human, he still doesn't feel the way Patrick does which I think makes it impossible to have true control over Evans body, because he refuses to WORK with him. Habit wants to be in full power and not share, but in order to achieve full power bro needs to share HELP.
#TY FOR THE ASK#my hcs#hcs#everymanhybrid#emh#slenderverse#evan myers#habit#habit emh#Ethan rants 🐍#🐍 ⦻
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poppys amazing guide to free money for in app purchases (not clickbait)
long post ahead, sorry in advance. now idk if anyone else has talked about this at all, at least in the sky community. but with the amount of IAPs in sky (and seeing periodic posts of people offering services like commissions in exchange for season passes or exclusive IAP cosmetics) i feel like i just cant sit on this knowledge any longer if people turn out to not know about it. maybe almost everyone is aware of it and/or already using it or doesnt care and im a silly goose, but if this can save even just one person some money, or allow them to buy something they couldn't have afforded otherwise, then i'll be happy lol. it's certainly helped me and i'd like to share the love.
getting to the point: if you are on android/use google play (sorry everyone else idk if apple/the app store or other platforms have something similar, might be worth looking into or idk maybe this same app is on there too), then you can use this app called Google Opinion Rewards to get free google play credit.
this is going to feel like a cheesy fake youtube sponsorship or something but For Real this app gives you basically free money in response to answering surveys. i downloaded it a few years ago after one guy mentioned it in a video in passing, and as of now i have gotten from it almost $150 of google play credit.
“poppy, this sounds super sus”, you might be thinking, shaking your head. “answering surveys?? isnt this a scam to collect your personal data??” and fair enough! yeah probably the data is being sold (though on the page they claim to not share it with 3rd parties), im not super internet wise or savvy but idk it seems like everything is selling your data nowadays. and to get the most amount of surveys you can, you have to have certain things turned on in your google account.
it might ask you about a place you've been recently, or if you've been looking up something lately, or if you remember watching a certain video on youtube, or whatever. sometimes it's very accurate and specific with the targeted surveys, and sometimes it's totally fucking random. to me its not any creepier than getting an ad for like. wendys after only talking about it out loud with my phone within earshot, and most of them are pretty innocuous anyway, at least in my opinion. idk. u dont have to use this. im just putting it out there for those who might want to give it a whirl.
Before i go into the nitty gritty rambly details (on the google doc below), here’s the reassurance: this is real. Yes, the reward for each survey is less than a dollar, but it adds up. Sometimes there are a whole bunch at once and that can bring in a good haul. Since downloading the app, i’ve answered 730 surveys, and from that earned $142.11 (as of writing this right now) in total rewards/credit.
That’s not nothing! I’ve been able to buy sky IAPs with nothing but credit that i’ve earned from answering these surveys. The longest of these surveys literally take a max of like 20 seconds, and u can go right to them from the notification on your phone. It takes 0 effort essentially and for me it is worth it to see that receipt for $0 in my inbox. I have a compulsive spending habit and use it rly often so in my case mostly it just acts as a discount, subtracting from the price however much is in my balance, but still! That’s better than paying full price! Free money is free money! You can also choose whether or not to use it when making a purchase, and stop answering questions and giving them the data at any time. You can choose what to share with them really easily from the settings in the app, so if you want to turn off just location or something, you can just go to “survey eligibility”, select what you want to change, and manage it as you like. The only thing you have to have is your age, since it won’t send surveys to users with no age on their account. And you can use the credit on other apps too, since it’s google play credit! I just mostly use it for buying sky IAPs. you can save up to buy a season pass!
If you’re like me (maybe not. Im kind of pathetic. Someone pls validate me), you’ve tried whatever you can to not pay for microtransactions. Yeah there’s stuff like mistplay and those annoying ass “tasks for coins” esque things within an app that have you sign up for online magazines or download other apps and get to level 3 of PigFarmVille or whatever to earn credit or money, but those never got me anywhere and this is the most effective, legitimate thing i’ve ever used for this purpose. It takes time and patience, but before you know it you’ll have $5 kicking around in your balance and you can buy the cute oreo headband or pair of shoes or whatever tgc has in the shop this time. It legitimately feels like i’m cheating, sometimes, or that it’s too good to be true, but i’ve used this for three years now and it’s never let me down. And no i’m not sponsored, just a broke bitch that stumbled across this. They should give me something for this free promotion tho lmaoo
below I have both the sharing link to download the app if anyone wants to and a link to a google doc with my personal tips for this app on it since this post is way too long already and i dont want to waste more of peoples time, but anyway thanks for reading if you did, and if you try it out and it ends up helping lmk! c: and also maybe reblog to spread around if you think others would find this helpful. I almost never do posts like this especially bc im very unsure of myself and tend to think im wrong but sometimes i get stuff right and this feels like something i got right. Hope it helps you too.
Get paid for answering short surveys. Download Google Opinion Rewards now: https://googleopinionrewards.page.link/share
#remember this#sky cotl#sky children of the light#google opinion rewards#sky: cotl#advice#important#maybe??#sky children#skyblr#sky game#sky: children of the light#sky#that game company#tgc
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hehe im coming to say hi here instead of the other way around :3 but omg i think it just hit me now that.... w gwangil gone that's gonna be a very long time without an ot4 comeback and part of me just wants wonsang to enlist as soon as possible so that the time will be shorter until theyre back :( but i wonder if hes working on a lot of songs to put out while theyre enlisted since hes the producer.... i could def see yechan and sangyeop doing some type of comeback or putting out new music and maybe even collabing w other kbands like they did with daybreak. i honestly just hope we still get some new music cause idk how ill survive 2 years with no new lucy music (ik ill survive somehow but ive consistently been able to look forward to amazing comebacks from lucy since i stanned in 2022 during play era so... it'll def be a change of pace) BUT YEAH EMO HOURS HERE I COME 🫠
id be interested to know what you think their plan is for enlistment era. whether wonsang is gonna enlist sooner or later and new music timeline etc!! recently also been thinking about what type of songs lucy would write for you...
yechan would make a super emotional song and ofc its gonna have a beautiful violin section in it, i feel like he could even incorporate some classical music into it and it'd be soooo pretty. but more frequently than writing his own songs for you he'd always take your requests for anything you want him to play
sangyeop would probably put you through some emotions like he'd be singing his heart out to you and after hes done he'd be his usual bright cheery self acting like he didn't just make you cry from his pretty voice
wonsang 100% gonna write an admiration song about you like he did with holly LMAO and would poke fun at your habits or your relationship together, would prob sound like an anime opening too CAUSE HES WONSANG <//3 (my bias rly showing through damn why do i have so many thoughts abt this) but knowing how many songs he writes he'd prob have a range as well with some sadder or just more emotional romantic songs
gwangil is gonna write you the cutest and most heartwarming song ever just like his song would you dance with me !! i feel like hes really into the bright and fun side of love and while his voice is rly suited for slower softer songs, he would want to make you smile with his song, not cry so he'd stray away from that vibe skdjks
man i rly love them so much 💔💔💔 lucy are the best !!
Hi :3
Seeing the photos from their schedules really made it hit home that he isn't there. Stoppp it hadn't even occurred to me that we won't be getting ot4 comeback for a while. I do hope that Wonsang goes soon, but you're right he's probably busy working on stuff that they can put out while he's gone. That would make most sense anyway. I think he'd maybe go around Dec/early next year? I'd imagine they'd want him to be there for award show season if they perform and then he'd go after that? I really hope Yechan and Sangyeop put out music or at least just do schedules while the others are away. Alot of the videos that I had seen when villain came out were just Yechan and Sangyeop, so I wasn't sure if that was them preparing us for how it will be over the next couple of years lol. I think they'll continue to thrive even as a duo, isn't N.Flying still doing well despite being down 3 members? (I haven't kept up to date with them, so I genuinely don't know. All I know is Seunghyub has been in a couple of dramas lol)
I do think we'll get another cb before Wonsang goes! Wasn't boogie man released in Dec? Maybe they'll do another one then?
Yes!! Yechan would definitely have classical or Ghibli vibes in his song! All I can think of is my warm loneliness with it's soft sound and beautiful violin solo in the middle of it. I agree, I think it would be super emotional but also really cute, I think I'd cry if he wrote me a song ahaha. I think Yechan may regret taking requests lol, I definitely would have a few
Sangyeop would be such a menace, writing such an emotional song that makes you bawl and then he'd probably have the audacity to tease you for crying after. I think his would definitely be acoustic (so that you can focus on his voice more) . I think the lyrics would be so beautiful, I NEED him to write me a song lol. I would cry if there was a key change in it, I am a sucker for a key change
Wonsang's song for Holly was so cute oh my goodness. Another song like domino would be so funny. It's such a funny song, especially with the intro ahaha. Maybe he would put funny sound bites from videos of you both in the intro, from clips of you doing the most stupid things (but he finds it endearing because he is so in love with you). Oh and the bit between the verse and chorus could be him listening off things that he loves about you (in his really cute voice 🥺)
I feel like Gwangil would write such a goofy song. I definitely think he would be able to write a really emotional song like Sangyeop, but he's not gonna show you that yet (he's waiting for the right moment because he's going to ask for your hand after, I need to stop lol). I could see it being a really cheesy song or one that's filled with stupid puns because he knows that you hate them but you love him and he's going to be annoying about it. I love how you said that he's "into the bright and fun side of love", I definitely agree with that. I agree that he wouldn't want to make you cry, I feel like his is the only one who wouldn't make you cry with his song (Wonsang wouldn't want to make you cry, but he writes such beautiful songs that I think he would do it accidentally lol)
I think I'm getting a little to in to this, I need to stop (but this will definitely be all I think about for the rest of the day lol). That was very fun to think about
How's life treating you now that it's September? Has your schedule become really busy or is it not too bad? It's definitely been weird to not be in any form of school this year, this is the first time in like 19yrs that I haven't done this (that make me feel so disgusting and old to say that ahaha). Hope you aren't too busy or overwhelmed!
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💘, ✨, 🍓, 💌, 🐶, 💭 for any 🤍🤍
gasp CUTE PROMPTS THANK U ALEXIS
shroomiya
💘 — what's the closest you've ever gotten to confessing?
during her preparing for the year's summer festival. seeing all her passion for the festival (+ anything else) is one of my favorite things about her, so i was about to abandon all confession plans and tell her right then :)
✨ — describe your crush f/o in your own words!
just.. wowowowowow <3 wow <333 she's so pretty!! and lovely!! and full of beauty and endearing habits!! <333
🍓 — what did they do that first caught your eye?
honestly? i just saw her once and thought she was pretty dhcigcjh (which she is ofc 💖) I spotted her out of the corner of my eye while walking to my home and thought about her the entire way back
💌 — have you ever written love notes/letters to them? what about poetry about them?
oh 100%. I love love love writing letters for her. something that I made that she can keep?? im definitely making her so many she'll have to dedicate a drawer to them. (I'm very much a person of sentimental keepsakes, so I'd also give her more than just letters. like little souvenirs from places we've been together!!)
🐶 — is your crush on them obvious? how do you act around them?
very. but I also act very loving with my close friends so it could be easily covered up by "oh shroom does this with all their friends!!" but if you looked into it, it would be evident that I'm looking too much into how i appear to feel about her so I'd end up being MORE obvious. but yea I'd act very sweet and loving to her and try to cover it up by it just being platonic hcchuchj
💭 — have they ever appeared in your dreams? do you daydream about them often?
irl, I forget most of my dreams so idk xgucguxug. but in universe i would have the occasional dream of her! but yes <3 she does often cross my mind <3 fish and fireworks remind me of her!!!
shroomsym
💘 — what's the closest you've ever gotten to confessing?
ok this requires some context. stress is a part of the game he's from, if you get too much you can't do some things (it goes up to 100). once each time you find sym, eventually you can click an option and he will relieve 5 stress. the way he does this is by putting his forehead on yours. the first time he did this i was so awestruck by him and almost blurted out my feelings (he probably already knew by then fyucguxjgxgj)
✨ — describe your crush f/o in your own words!
he's so.. !!! <3 as dys (another character from the game) would say, "he's more pretty than handsome" he is!! he's very pretty <3
🍓 — what did they do that first caught your eye?
this also requires some context. so you can go exploring in game, and this is how you meet sym. you get a few glimpses of him and I have too much space in my brain for him to fill. he's called a mysterious stranger the first times you see him. how is he supposed to leave my mind after that?
💌 — have you ever written love notes/letters to them? what about poetry about them?
yes but sadly paper to write on is not really a thing in this game hjccvjccjg. HOWEVER!!! it got replaced with digital stuff. 50% of my notes are definitely about him in some way.
🐶 — is your crush on them obvious? how do you act around them?
even more than with yoimiya. he knows. probably before I do. but does he do anything about it? no he'd wait for me to say something, not because he's nervous, but because he'd want to know how I'd confess to him. but I would be VERY flustered around him, especially because there are basically zero times when I'm with sym and someone else (for a while, at least).
💭 — have they ever appeared in your dreams? do you daydream about them often?
irl, same as yoimiya, I forget 99% of my dreams so probably but idk ihccihcuh. but for in universe. being so real. he'd find a way to worm himself into my dreams. which sounds weird but it'd be for us to have a tea party or something fyxguxgux. but yes, I think about him, too <3 purple reminds me of him
#btw ik like none of you know who sym is but I adore him <3 I hope you don't mind me including him ugxxugxg#sym.. <3#BUT I LOVE YOIMIYA!! SHE'S THE CUTEST#SHE'S SO EVERYTHING!!#oh wait sym is. he's. like. this#alien guy. he's purple :}#he's such a sweetie id love to have a tea party with him <3#also yoimiya has been such a way for me to slowly heal. thank you lovely for reinforcing that love is real <3#I love them both with so much of me!!#:shroom is typing...#:shroomiya:#:shroomsym:#sym <3 yoimiya <3#thank you so much for the ask alexis!! ur next vi.. mwah hah hah...#...with alexis:
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my apologies if this is too simple or juvenile or personal a question but HOW did you become such a proficient writer? and do you have any tips or pointers to keep in mind? i know you must do a lot of reading and a lot of writing, but your skill is just incredible to me. your prose!! your cadence!! when we get around to talking about it is genuinely one of the best things i've ever read and i'd eat it if i could!!!
this ask was so sweet thank you!! rly made my day when i needed a boost. Hope you don’t mind i took a couple days to think about it cause no one’s ever asked me for writing advice before
idk how i became a “proficient” writer bc I really don’t write that much. something about my fic gave me brainworms and i went into overdrive but that’s…not my usual MO. which is why it’s weird for me too. admittedly i am studying english/creative writing as my second major at uni, but i haven’t learned anything in any of my classes you couldn’t learn by just reading and writing on your own. honestly i should’ve stuck with my IR major instead, i find structured cw classes a complete waste of time. but here are some little tips i thought of that would’ve helped ME:
This is more a “do as I say not as I do” because I’m really bad at habits like this, but keep a diary. You can write about the big events (went to the store, did homework, got laid etc.) but that’s boring—focus on the details (watched someone at west side market throw a glass bottle of olives at a rat, broke a pen and permanently stained my dorm desk and won’t get my deposit back which pissed me off because I move out in a week, this guy’s breath smelled like lemon pledge and it made me wonder if he drank window cleaner before kissing me etc.). Real life is really interesting! How can you write about interesting real life in an interesting way? It’s a good way to practice. You don’t have to do a big reflection at the end of the day or anything. It’s okay to jot down something you saw & then immediately forget about it. It’s the act of figuring out how to translate life into words that’s important
If you type, learn how to type FAST. This is just my experience, but I think typing faster makes your cadence, clause length, dialogue, IDEAS flow better/more naturally. We think in words/sentences, not letters.
This is a super lame tip that’ll make you roll your eyes, but read poetry. Poetry is all about how words/ideas/images sound and interact with each other. Don’t get hung up on one poet—im not really recommending any for precisely this reason—read poetry you love (for me, Ada Limón, Jack Kerouac, Frank O’Hara, ghazals etc) AND read poetry you hate (for me, Rupi Kaur, Emily Dickinson, Whitman, etc)! Read all genres you can get your hands on. (I think there are like “great poetry anthologies” you can find for free online if u don’t know where to start. Also you can’t go wrong with subscribing to/reading a variety magazine like the NYer. It’s pretentious but it exposes you to all kinds of weird topics, ways of writing about them, etc.) Figure out how certain combinations of words and punctuations make you FEEL, and why, and why the writer chose (or not) to make you feel that way. Figure out which literary sounds you like and which ones you don’t. For me, i figured out that I REALLY like alliteration, comma splices, zeugmas, the rule of three, and
“he’s [verb]ing again… yeah compacflt’s characters are [verb]ing again… big shocker”
If you have an idea for a piece, figure out what it is you really want to get out of it—to say something? to experiment with a different style? to see your fav characters do something? to have fun?—and then figure out how, on a technical level, you should write to match that goal (this is where the poetry training comes in handy). If you’re just writing to have fun, don’t listen to any writing advice (incl. mine), because most of it is bullshit and over-generalized and will make you feel bad about yourself. Just take the advice that you think will work for what YOURE trying to write.
But if you’re writing to explore some political idea, then you should think about HOW to best write about that idea. What would be a convincing story/allegory/scene to engage with this idea vs. not convincing. I talk on this blog all the time about how disappointed I am that my very-adult-grown-up attempt to deal with the dynamic of “immovable internalized homophobia vs unstoppable falling in love anyway” is rendered a little childish/immature by some pretty unconvincing plot points like the characters buying a house together—I really should have considered how that plot point would interact with the characterizations I’d built already (hint: poorly). You can think of writing as kind of a military structure if that helps—you have strategy on the overarching campaign (plot/character growth/allegory/theme) level, the battle (scene that advances the above) level, and the tactical (sentence-level construction/syntax/wording) level. They all have to work together. If a scene is failing to properly engage with the idea you’re trying to convey, you’re losing a battle that will weaken the overarching campaign. Same thing if you choose a weird word in a sentence/write in a style or tone that’s weirdly out of place with your idea—it makes your engagement with the theme/idea less convincing. just try to be purposeful and consider your strategy on all levels of your work as you’re writing it!! At the very least it’ll make editing easier lol.
But then again when I read my own writing from just a couple months ago I cringe out of my skin, so like—just also accept that it’s a process and we’re all just making it up as we go along. Be proud of being embarrassed of your old work, because it means you’re growing. Own that shit. When I finished writing WWGATTAI i thought it was the best thing I’d ever written, and maybe it was. But since the day I finished working on it, it’s the worst thing I’ve written since then. That’s a great feeling. Not to be like writing grindset obviously bc it’s supposed to be fun—but if what you want is to get better at writing, the strategy is to WRITE a whole bunch of shit, and then own your embarrassment about how much you’ve grown since you started. And know you’re still always growing and learning. there should never be any “goals” where skills are concerned 👍🏽
#fake it till u make it#the good part about fiction is all you’re really doing is makin shit up#no rules!!!#fiction is just trying to sell a lie right#so it’s all on a sliding scale of convincability (at least that’s how i judge fiction)#and figuring out how to convince people of your lie is where the art is#anyway.#not top gun#asks#writing tips#idk how to tag this#also i love ao3 because trying to get published traditionally genuinely made me hate writing/MY writing#i have indeed had the cliche 100+ form rejection letters experience#unfortunately writing is also one of those things where you can see it as a competition so easily#(admittedly a small part of why i don’t read other TG fics—i don’t wanna read people doing it better than me😭)#BUT you tailor your experience to have a healthy life. it’s not a competition if you don’t make it one. put yourself first
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