#idk if this even a bugatti

[florianlaurila]

this car was turned down by a girl it liked in middle school and ever since that day it decided to hate women and be the most pick me car in the existence

[bunny584]

OBSESSED: TOJI

A/N: You’re booked. Busy. Filled to the brim with board meetings. Then your car decides to stop functioning. There’s one mechanic shop open and somehow they seem to only hire God’s sweetest eye candy. One of which keeps getting stuck in the back of your throat. Uh—I mean—

S/N: Toji Mother-Fucking (literally) Fushiguro. Idk why it took me so long to feature this green-eyed monster but I am foaming at the mouth for this AU, him, and his lil vampy co-worker. Toji girlies, can’t WAIT to rush Toji Tau Sigma this fall 🙂‍↕️

C/W: ….he’s his own CW. Mature, 18+. MDNI. 

Art credit: yashaliart_01 on insta

Music: for the love of God if you don’t listen to Obsessed x Mariah Carey I’m calling the coast guard. Reader wants to pretend Toji is not her newest vice so BAD. Ive never laughed so hard and been so painfully turned on writing a piece. SOMEONE tell me not to make this a series RN.

“Can I get a little help here?”

Toji grabs the rag nestled in the back pocket of his heavy work cargos. Charcoal ink stains the fabric. 

Bugatti engines are such a bitch. And make a mess like one too. 

“Hello? Am I talking to a wall or..?”

And just like that, you’ve earned yourself a few more seconds of silence. 

The mechanic’s Evergreen gaze and satisfied smirk peer back at him in the mirror. Not even a second passes before you ensnare him in your fiery scrutiny. 

Ahh, yes. Just his type. 

You are mean. 

With a sexy fucking silhouette. An angry merlot painted on those beautiful, pouted lips. A fresh manicure and keys to your Benz dig into hips that have definitely stopped traffic. 

The mirror image isn’t enough of a bite. Toji needs a real taste, so he turns around to lock eyes with his new favorite unsatisfied customer. 

“Mornin, doll.” 

“Nice of you to grace me with your presence! I was starting to think no one worked here.” 

Melodramatic, the way you narrow your gaze to bring his name tag into focus. It’s hot, though. All this sarcasm and irritation. 

“—Toji? Is it?” You hiss venom. Clearly there’s a point you’re in a hurry to make. 

But..

it’s 7:13 AM on a lovely Monday morning.  Birds are singing. The Red Bull he just downed was particularly delicious. Life is good, right now. 

Toji has all the time in the world. 

He’s in no rush. Especially when a stunning, uptight, bratty little thing — sorry, career woman — like you woke up and chose him to be your personal punching bag. 

And he’s built to take hits. From fists much, much larger than yours, gorgeous.  

“Toji, it is. What can I do for you, darlin?” 

And he knew that sweet, innocent pet name would dump diesel fuel all over those pretty flames. 

You ramble off your full name as if he is going to use it. By the time he’s through with you, you won’t have any use for it either. 

His name, though. You’ll have plenty use for his name. 

“…and when the stupid thing turns on this morning, the dash light won’t turn off.” 

Toji lands on earth just in time to clasp the car keys shoved into his chest. You’re gawking at him. Expecting a fury of motion and urgency. Because your charming little fingers demand it. 

So accustomed to time stopping and starting on your watch, aren’t you? 

“You’re so pretty.” Toji responds with a shit eating grin. 

Just for the huffing and puffing you’re currently displaying. Sputtering about how unprofessional he is. And how much work you have to get done. 

Adorable. 

Toji slips past your disdain and makes his way to the front door. Matte black G-Wagon with a champagne interior. The vision of you behind the wheel, scowling at traffic, in your tailored dress and stilettos makes his cock twitch. 

“She’s a beauty.” He calls from the driver seat. 

“That’s why I bought it. Can you please pick up the pace a little?”

Both arms are folded across your chest, eyes rolling at his wasted breath stating the obvious. 

You’re going to look phenomenal when he has those defiant arms pinned above your head. He’ll diminish those daggers in your eyes to tears. And make those puffy lips whimper for mercy. 

Toji will have you begging him to pick up the pace in no time. Your snarky comment was just a test run. 

The mechanic lets out a low chuckle, his eyes scan the dash for the source of your apparent distress. 

The tire pressure gauge. 

Really, gorgeous? This is why you’re screwed so tightly this morning? 

It should take approximately 3 minutes to fix. But there’s no way Toji is letting you slip away from his skilled fingers so easily. Not when you need to be unwound.

Unraveled bit by bit until you’re a warm, sweet, puddle of manners and gratitude. 

“Alright, babydoll—“

“My name is—“

“I’ll have my guys get to workin on it, sweetheart.” 

He can play this game all day. You scoff. Temporarily placated by his promise of a fix. 

“It’s an all day job, though.” Toji’s right hand man comes into view. 

The only other guy in the shop (on the planet) to get as much play as he does without meaning to. 

Women are insane about his stupid, empty-headed, love-drunk stare. And the purple rings around his eyes like the last time he got sleep was in his mother’s womb. Always giggling and asking about “the hot one with the pigtails” and “the pretty one with the tattoo on his nose.”

If he were a less confident man, Toji would’ve called someone else over. But the kid gets his antics. 

And today is going to be stuffed with them. 

“Choso! Can you take this beauty to the back for repair?” 

Dracula’s first born is sporting his hair down today. Already a bit damp from work. He gives you a once over, then offers a smile that evaporates underwear off of women. 

“Happy to. Which beauty am I taking to the back?”

“Ha, quit your lover boy shit.” Toji teases, and you sneer at his hypocrisy. 

“The car, big guy. Have it ready by 5:00, yeah?”

“5:00 pm?” You do a thing with your hands eventually landing on your hips. And Toji’s dick leaks like a virgin. 

“Well, there must be a courtesy rental. My first meeting starts in an hour.”

“I’m so sorry, miss. We don’t have that.” 

Kamo, you slick fuck. 

Choso apologizes with his signature puppy-eyes and half open mouth. Even you, made of sharp words and soft curves. Goddess of Fire and Ice, you melt under his gaze. 

Toji snickers to himself, while you stutter to a shockingly patient understanding. 

Something about the boy looking half asleep and like he can’t string letters together to spell his own name always does the trick. Leaving you wide open for the kill. 

“Tell you what, sweetheart.” Toji moves in with an assassin’s expertise. 

“Consider me your courtesy rental.”

“I’m sorry—what?” You flicker between the two smiles, rightfully suspicious. 

“I’ll get you from point A to point B, safe and sound.” The mechanic offers again with a broad smile, dangling his own car keys in his hand. 

Pensive eyes drop down to your watch. Board meetings start soon and he is offering a courtesy ride. 

“Fine.” Finally, a little submission. 

“It’s a 10 minute drive. The high rise on the corner of Koen and Mitake street.” 

The financial district. No wonder why you’re so tightly wound. 

“I know exactly, where we are going.” Toji beams. Beating your slender fingers to the passenger door. You barely mutter a ‘thanks’ before settling into the seat. 

You in your heels. And suit jacket. And handbag that costs enough to feed a large family for 6 months. Nestled so perfectly into his passenger seat. Toji can’t help but acknowledge how hard his dick is right now. 

The career woman clearly doesn’t approve of how fast he is hurling down corner streets. But you should understand, no? Places to be, and all that jazz?

“Uh, I’m sorry, where exactly are you taking me?” You perk up. Darting those beautiful warm eyes at the very short building in front of you. 

Not the corner of Koen and Mitake street, but Toji’s favorite coffee shop about 3 blocks over. The only place in the city that can get an Americano right - La Parisian. 

Toji grins maniacally. Pulling his sports car into a front row spot. 

“Point A, darlin.”

“Look, I don’t know what kind of game you are playing but I swear—“

“C’monnn. Lighten up.” He turns to face your incredulous expression. You wear it well, by the way.

“People stand when you walk in a room.” He continues. “They’ll still stand if you’re 5 minutes late and properly caffeinated.” 

Silence. Two huffs. A bitten lower lip. And one long, drawn out sigh.

“Fine. 5 minutes, max. Then I’ve got to get going I have—“

“Meetings baby, I know.” Toji finishes you off. 

He steps out of the driver’s seat fast enough to be at your door before your fingers touch the handle. 

The two of you walk in stride (in Toji’s mind) to the cafe. It’s adorable how you beeline towards the pastry display. Salivating over the various treats. Doing the thing women do, badgering the person manning the register about nutritional details. 

As if your figure wouldn’t make any living red-blooded human being fall to their knees. 

“What can I get started for you?” The barista probes. 

“I’ll have a soy London Fog latte, please.” You flicker over to the dessert you think you’re leaving behind. 

“And?” Toji probes. He taps the glass in front of the vanilla macaroon.

Another crack in the shield. You flash him a genuine smile for 0.04 seconds before turning back to the register.

“…and a vanilla macaroon, please.” You’re cute when you’re sheepish. 

“And I’ll have the largest iced Americano you can make, thanks.” 

Toji closes out the transaction and you two mosey over to a small table by a window. Your shoulders relax with the first sip of coffee. 

A satisfied grin tugs on your chauffeur’s lips. He knew what you needed the second he laid eyes on you. 

Much to your chagrin, and Toji’s delight — conversation flows like a bottomless well between you. The second something warm and another thing sweet landed on your tongue — the shield crumbled down. 

You’re an account executive. 

You work 80+ hour weeks. 

Live in an uppity neighborhood with a Doberman named Rocky. You got him because you like walking around at night to clear your mind. Having a dog taller than you on its hind legs and probably twice your size has eased your anxiety about that. 

You have a mean sweet tooth. 

And you’re single. Have been for the last year or so. 

“And not looking to change that anytime soon.” You reiterate, tossing him a look. 

Toji holds his hands up in feigned defeat. “I wasn’t plannin’ on it, sweetheart.” 

You’ve warmed up to his pet names, albeit against your will. But you’re there. The both of you harmonize light-hearted laughter. Fitting together like missing puzzle pieces.

“Your eyes are so green.” 

A rather obvious observation of your own, after a few moments of comfortable silence. 

As if your eyes don’t bend time. 

Toji catches his breath before responding. 

“They are…your kids could have ‘em too, if you want.” 

You burst into another fit of giggles. Unknowingly driveling rogue pastry on your chin. Babbling on and on about how ridiculous he is. And how cheesy his pick up lines are.

Meanwhile, you’re sitting there all high powered and intelligent. With a smile that makes him want to be a better man than he is. 

…and pastry all over your chin. 

Yeah. 

He’s going to marry you one day. 

Toji reaches over and swipes the macaroon off your chin. A sharp gasp tumbles from your lips, staring at his fingers. Which Toji slips into his mouth. 

He’s a betting man and would put money down on the fact that the dessert tastes exponentially better off of your skin. 

“Toji!!” 

“What else can I do for you?” Each word more smug than the last. 

“You could’ve told me I had food on my face!” Bunny lines along your nose deepen when you frown and Toji’s cock throbs to life. 

“Why?” The mechanic shrugs. “I wanted to lick it off instead.” 

The choppy inhale is music to Toji’s ears. You avoid him. Like the plague. Peeling your gaze away and planting it on the side window. Under the guise of people watching. 

But Toji knows better. 

He doesn’t miss the way you struggle to swallow your last bite. Or your thighs coming together so aggressively beneath the small table, rip tides break the surface of his Americano. 

“I felt that, baby.” Toji leans in. Shameless about the way he scans your face. 

Your lips should be outlawed.

The bottom one is marginally fuller than the top, so it naturally hangs a bit open. Inviting the most vile thoughts from his cock. Toji’s rational mind went to sleep the second you climbed into his passenger seat, princess. 

“What?” You sputter, gulping down the rest of your U.K. cloudy cappuccino, or whatever. 

“I don’t know what you’re referring to.” Your voice is steady, but the fidgeting and cagey eye contact hold the truth. 

Oh, really? 

“You’re squirming in your seat.” Toji counters, unblinking. Filling as much of your personal space as he can without tipping over. 

“Quick to cross your legs—“

“Toji!” 

Is your underwear as sticky as your face is flushed? Saliva pools in one direction, warm pre-cum pools in the other. 

“You are so out of—“

“All that talkin’ and you haven’t denied it once, doll.”

Toji’s palm digs into his crotch underneath the table. You are fucking his brain smooth with the raspberry blush along your nose and high cheeks. Sure, the sarcasm and ball-busting is hot, but this? 

The Career Woman suddenly so flustered and shy? 

You’re already thawed out. All he needs to do is dive in. 

Toji blinks back to reality when you rocket up from the table at warped speed. Your fingers clumsily fondle the zipper of your purse. 

“Excuse me for a minute.” You’re halfway to the restroom stalls by the end of your sentence.

The mechanic lasers down to the serpentine curve of your hips. Your plump, perky ass is just begging to be handled. It’s a felony, the way your work dress hugs your body. 

Is he really going to do this?

Heat slams into his groin. Wave after wave of lust slowly chipping at his teetering self-control. 

You might slap him. 

Call him a goddamn pervert. 

…and just the thought of either of those things makes his dick beat against his zipper. 

Fuck it. 

Toji is slick, how he maneuvers his way over to the restrooms. Both single-use stalls occupied, he walks up to you muttering some kind of pep talk to yourself. 

“Get your shit together.” You spit out. 

Amused, Toji leans against the wall behind you. Curious about where this cute little speech is going to go. 

“He’s a rando you met at a mechanic shop. For fuck sake, are you that horny?”

“Sounds like it, baby.” Toji takes the liberty to answer. You whip your head around and crawl out of your skin. 

Eyes wider than a newborn kitten. Mouth gaping as if you’re trying to show off how much you can handle. Toji swallows a groan. He can’t lose control. Not a chance. He has to savor his first taste of you like this. And every taste after that. 

Because, the weather in Hell is a balmy 0 degrees Fahrenheit and you are his, now. 

“I—uh, I—“ Your eyes dart over to the poor soul opening the bathroom door in slow motion. 

You think you’ve found an out, gorgeous?

Toji is faster and bigger than you are. Gripping the handle of the open door, ushering you into his new lair. Still choking on the shock of him catching your admission, you look to your left and right before diving into the empty bathroom. 

“Toji I…” 

Your back hits the wall and eyes settle on your hands. Shifty and nervous. Toji palms himself at the sight of you caged in like this. 

He’s disgusting, he knows that. 

And normally, he would ask permission. Being a gentleman and all. 

But there’s something too alluring about the way you’re trembling right now. The obvious conflict written all over your face, and heaving chest…and tense thighs…

His cock can’t take another second. 

And apparently neither can you. 

Because the second his fingers cup the back of your neck and his breath grazes your mouth you crash into him. Slotting your puffy lips into his, taking him by surprise for a millisecond. 

“Oh, T-toji.” You whine into his mouth. Grasping at his shoulders that are far too wide, far too muscular for your dainty grip.

Fucking, christ. 

Hearing his name like that. 

The gorgeous, high-pitched, pathetic plea trails down his ears to his aching sex and jerks it. If his cargos were any lighter you would’ve seen the pre-pubescent mess he’s making in his pants right now. 

But they aren’t. And you don’t. 

You mewl at how Toji nips at your bottom lip. Sinking it underneath his teeth until its swells to his liking. Melting beneath his large grasp, currently riding the dizzying lines of your hips and ass. 

“You taste fucking good, baby.” Toji mumbles into your warm cavern. Licking along the warm, soft ridges. 

“Ah-T..god.” You pull away and dive into his neck. Attempting to hide your utterly fucked out daze, but he won’t let you. 

Toji palms your ass with a tenth of his strength. You yelp and jump into his arms. He takes advantage of the momentum and lifts you high on his waist. Temporarily forcing you to look down on him.

Glassy eyed. Kiss abused lips. Panting and heaving. Cupping his face like your hands were made to. 

And something tight clenches in Toji’s chest. It takes a moment for him to shake it off, but it existed.

He’ll revisit that later.

“You look good up there, babydoll.” He pants, before setting you down on the sink ledge. He catches your chin in his hand before you turn away. Rooting you in place. 

“I…Toji.” 

Moaning his name like you’re begging for him to start and stop all at once. 

Your eyes descend to his lips. Watching the smirk blossoming across his face. Distracted enough not to notice his free hand shove up your dress in one swift motion. 

Your thighs recognize his authority and melt wide open for him. He kisses your tiny whimpers while nestling between them. 

“Mmmgh g-god please.” 

“This why you were so bratty this mornin baby?” 

Toji’s index and long fingers stroke your soaked, clothed core. Thin lace panties plastered to your warm sex. You wind your hips into his fingers. Batting your eyelashes up at him as if he’s going to give you what you want so easily.

He hovers his lips over yours. Pulling away each time you lunge forward for a kiss. Pouty and frustrated, you dig your nails into his neck and grind along his stationary fingers. 

“T-Toji, please…I’m so..ahh.”

“Needy cunt just wanted some attention, mm?” 

His fingers slip past your opening, and you offer up a soprano moan that shatters to stardust. 

Hedonistic noises fill the spaces between both of your punched out gasps. You’re fucking tight. Gummy, slick walls clamp down around his knuckles when he curves up to pet your pleasure spot. 

The steel pipe between his legs throbs against his thigh. Demanding friction. But one hand is cupping your chin and the other is so pussy drunk an army couldn’t pry his fingers away. 

“T..I—I’m oh fuck I—“

Toji bites down on your bottom lip. And you clench around him. Gushing more of your sweet arousal into his palm. And he damn near laps it up with his greedy tongue. 

“Shhh baby,” he coos against your jaw. 

“Can’t have everyone hearing the Executive getting fucked open by some mechanic’s hands can you?” 

There is a delicious irony in you treating him like a punching bag no more than an hour ago and now bucking your hips on his fingers, chasing an ever elusive high.

Sandpaper lines Toji’s throat. 

He wants nothing more than to bounce you on his cock in this bathroom. Fill you up with his cum and send you to your meetings full of him. 

But you haven’t learned your lesson yet.

“What did I promise baby?” Toji strains in your ear. His hand migrates from your chin to your neck, while his fingers ‘pick up the pace a little.’

His pretty little powerhouse. 

You babble a chorus of nothing. Unable to breathe, unable to think. Only drip. And leak. And squelch around his digits. Toji tightens the grip around your pulse point. Lulling your mouth open.  

“Talk to me, princess. What did I promise you?” He probes again, stealing air from your lungs. 

Tha—y-you would…p—point A.” Barely audible syllables tumble out of you. Ascending in pitch. Your hips reflexively try to pull away from your threatened orgasm.

“Keep going, I’m listenin.” 

“Oh fuck T..Toji?! I-Im c-im gonna—”

“I know, baby.” He smears wet kisses along your jawline. “ I can hear how messy your precious little pussy is. But I didn’t give you permission to stop. Keep going.”

Your walls spasm at his command. Followed by an angelic pitiful little whine. You’re close. So close. 

“P-P-point A to—“

“Point B.” 

Toji finishes your sentence as you reach nirvana. Full body convulsions. He slots his arms around the small of your waist. And it fits like it was molded for him. Like you were sculpted for him.

And he, for you.

The mechanic burns his gaze into your skin. Riding each choppy wave of your ecstasy. Such tiny, sexy sounds. Staccato breaths fanning his lips, his chin, his neck when you try to hide from his scrutiny. 

You are a goddamn dream. 

And his future wife.

Toji guessed it when the macaroon balanced on your chin for a full 30 seconds before he swiped it away and you accused him of defamation of character. 

But now? 

Watching you saddle this stallion of an orgasm. Clawing at his back with all the desperation of a pretty little damsel in distress. 

Distress at just his fingers, alone. 

What intoxicating melody will he unlock when he laps up the honey straight from your core? How will you gasp and moan and squirm when he single-handedly re-shapes your cunt to accommodate his size? 

He has no clue. 

But Toji will spend forever figuring you out. And mastering you.

The back of your neck fits beautifully into his grasp as he coaxes you from hiding. Pupils blown out. Cheeks flushed and warm. Tendrils matted along your forehead. Before he can speak, you beat him to the punch.

Of course you do. 

“I’ve decided,” You pant. The baseline spice returning to your grin. 

“That you might just be obsessed with me, Toji.” 

Both of you share a hushed laugh. Exchanging cotton candy breaths. But then his lips accidentally brush yours and Toji can’t help but dive in for a kiss. Fucking the warm cavern of your mouth with his tongue. 

You pull away before he’s ready, with a look on your face that makes him feel like a God. 

“I might be.” Toji whispers, partially against his will. His lips find the corner of your mouth. Careful to avoid falling victim to your pout again.

“Let’s get you to the other point B, baby.” 

The car ride to your office could make anyone queasy. 

Constant banter back and forth. Full bodied laughs. You mindlessly stroking his forearm with those angelic fingers riling his cock up as if it just now discovered women. 

You let out a small sigh, with slightly dropped shoulders when your office building comes into view. Toji doesn’t know how to interpret it. But for him? Reality is coming too quickly.

“So,” You start once the both of you are out of the car. Pretty face tilting up and Toji’s dick strains against its confines.

“What do I owe you, Mr. Fushiguro?” 

The way you say his name.

It takes the will of God for Toji to bite back his original response.

“Nothin, doll.” He’s wearing the same, dumb, love-struck face Choso wears on a daily basis. Shockingly, Toji couldn’t care less. 

“The tires just needed air. Choso will drop it off in an hour.” 

He would do it himself. But the urge to park in an empty lot and abuse the fuck out of his cock until a shred of clarity re-settles in his mind is a tad bit overwhelming, sweetheart.

Then your mouth drops in an incredulous ‘Oh’ and all Toji can picture is ruining the back of your throat. How pretty you are going to be wretching around his girth. Gasping for air. Choking on his cum. 

“Toji. Fushiguro.” You like using his name, don’t you?

“You held me hostage for a whole morning for some air—“

Toji kisses the rest of your complaints off your tongue. And you whine. Slot open for him with no resistance. Because under all that irritation and sarcasm, buried within the Trojan Horse, lays your supple, delectable submission. 

And he will take every opportunity to taste it. 

“I had a great time on our first date, babydoll.” Toji rasps against your swollen lips. 

The raging erection is threatening to embarrass him. There’s not enough restraint in the world to be around you any longer. Toji nestles your voice in his back pocket. The two of you watch each other with wordless, taken aback smiles as he takes slow steps toward his sports car.

Before the mechanic sinks into the driver’s seat, he makes a promise.

“Can’t wait for our second date, Mrs. Fushiguro!”

[pianocat939]

…

(I ended up studying for like 5 hours today on foreign language idk why, but yeah- I’ll try to get a request done. And start on Ch. 1 of monster series)

I make way too many alternates but…

Just listen.

Mean girl Donnie.

Tw: implied/explicit threatening, implied bribery maybe?, very disorganized thoughts, blackmailing, controlling behaviour, degradation, please read with caution just cuz’ the relationship is pretty toxic…in a controlling way

Like not the popularized, blonde and have a group kind of mean girl-

I mean like…

Super smart and super rich Mean girl Donnie.

He’s on the way to valedictorian, (and will be). He has a lot of power within the school, whether it’s being leader of multiple clubs or a student president.

He’s super fucking rich. (Somehow…) He’s wearing Dior, Prada, Saint Laurent, Swarovski, Burberry- Anything you can imagine of luxury.

He never looks bad. Ever. He’s always looking perfect. He could be wearing a really dashing purple suit and loafers one day. And another day be wearing hot pink and white sweater and skirt- like he wears all kinds of clothes. But he never looks bad.

He doesn’t have a minion group. He solely believes in his independence. [His brothers…he doesn’t put much notice on them, he’s a more notable being]

Let’s say MC is like. Just there. Not unpopular or popular…just there.

Their life is pretty mundane until they accidentally bump into Donnie while he was fixing his- idk lipstick or eyebrows- causing it to go wild on his face.

He’s immediately offended, confronting them why they have the audacity to ruin his perfect makeup/brows.

[his appearance (feminine or masculine) changes every day so either situation works]

MC ends up getting a life of hell from then on.

Wether they’re accused by teachers for no reason, or wondering why their friends or more on edge when talking to them. Their school life isn’t exactly hell…but isn’t great either.

At some point, they can’t tolerate it and ask Donnie what he did. Only to end up unraveling a horror story of a dictator.

He’s blackmailing them, threatening that he’ll expose it to everyone, and anything. (MC didn’t even do such a thing, he just managed to fake it).

Poor MC can’t help but accept his deal by being his “minion” for the next month.

In the morning, MC has to basically chauffeur Donnie to school, in a flashy ass Bugatti.

They have to carry all his stuff, and follow him around. They can’t go through their normal schedule, they have to follow his.

They have to participate at all his extracurricular events, meetings, whatever.

.

.

.

Until a few weeks later, the things they have to do change.

They have to wear the clothes he’s picked out for them on whatever day. [it’s always matching in colour or style with his]

They have to call him any form of endearments he wants. And gets pissed if they don’t.

[Now I know he isn’t for physical touch, but for the sake of the alternate bear with me]

On days he wears lipstick, he covers them in kisses on their face, staining their cheeks all over. And they can’t take it off, because of his annoyance. So the entire school knows.

They have to follow EXACTLY the same schedule as him, even outside of school. Like…maybe not doing the exact same thing, but waking up, sleeping, and all like the daily things have to be aligned with his.

They have to call him every night and talk with him…keep him company. (Which MC soon realizes Donnie actually thinks of MC as a significant other, just in a controlling way.) He gets quite lovey-dovey during the midnight calls.

“MC…you’re the only person I like touching at all~ I mean…you look so stupid walking around covered in my lipstick stains hihi~…”

They sleep over at his house every weekend- they’re just basically incorporated into his life.

…

By the end of the month, the entire school just considers MC as Donnie’s lover…and MC can’t deny the title no matter what. The school believes Donnie more than MC.

——————————————————

(This brain rot turned out a lot longer than I thought oops-)

You know, we got rich mean girl Donnie,

How about Dumb Pink Squad Leo? Like, the actual stereotypical mean girls.

- Celina

(I need help from my thoughts lmao)

[deafeningfanlight]

TSAMS Headcanons [But ME being uncreative tho :D]

PLEASE LEMME JUST IGNORE THE LORE RIGHT NOW AND INSTEAD HAVE SOME ✨POSITIVITY ✨ SPREAD HERE :'D

Alright, let's get this sh*t rolling >:D

Moondrop uses he/they/it pronouns and identifies as boyflux, sometimes feeling strongly male and at other times less so, occasionally identifying with the agender spectrum as well. [I'M F*CKING BAD AT EXPLAINING BRO BUT I'VE AN EXCUSE: I'm not your teacher, YOUR TEACHER IS GOOGLE NOW SO LOOK IT THE F*CK UP PLS 😭]

Earth believes Santa Claus is real, and if anyone would tell her the truth and shatter her dreams, her whole fam would straight up find out the person's IP adress and idk, sent Monty like a military to the location.

While Ruin was the adorable silly shark we all loved [BEFORE THIS PLOT TWIST HAPPENED-] he forced Solar to particapate in his stage plays. Solar would be the princess, and Ruin would be the prince who would save him :D They got the dresses from Earth, who complimented Solar RESTLESSLY how gorgeous he looked in them :D Lunar would just say:" Stylish twink >:D"

Lunar regresses his age during intense situations and when he's reminded by his trauma. Earth often takes then the caretaker role. [I've not many headcanons for Lunar 😭]

The Bloodmoon Twins love nature and are befriended with some animals in a forest. For example, they play with wolf puppies and go with them on hunts :D AND I HEADCANON THEM AS ASEXUAL AND POLYROMANTIC BECAUSE MY HEADCANONS, MY RULES-

The whole celestial family and their villains are asexual because I think it would be cool if all of them share a single trait and have a common ground :D It would be also logical cuz like, when all kinda have the same code or stemmed from other codes, then it would make sense that they share some traits? 🤔

Moon has a passion for anything related to horror, including true-crime stories and creepypastas that he only reads because he can laugh at them. He would be that type of guy who leaves troll comments on some random creepypasta fanfics XD

Eclipse actually really likes fashion and to simply look stylish! :D He even has a passion for it and spends hours choosing his attire, struggling to decide which one to take. Most of the time, he chooses a a black vest with a white shirt underneath, the sleeves of which are fitted tightly and extend to his elbows. He prefers to go with an old-fashioned and gentlemanly style. However, he doesn't necessarily reject more feminine styles and ocassionally likes to put eyeshadows or an eyeliner on as well. Earth and Eclipse share therefore a common ground because both really like fashion :D

Okay, there SOME POSITIVITY SPREAD! :D Maybe I'll post some angsty headcanons later on, BUT Y'KNOW, MY MOTIVATION IS FASTER GONE THAN A DAMN BUGATTI SO PFF- XD

[kenzuieee]

ran haitani x spoiled gf

nothing..just some ran headcanons

ran haitani who doesn’t even try to hide the fact that hes staring at you while being behind the wheel of his bugatti la voiture noire.

ran haitani whose eyes glance from the street infront of his eyes to you. he practically undress you with them anytime theres a red light as his left hand grips the steering wheel whilst his right hand caresses your plush thighs. 

y/n who has to constantly remind ran to focus on the road as he keeps losing focus due to y/n quite literally seducing him without even knowing it.

y/n who constantly runs up ran’s bank card almost every day without a care in the world ? why should she care ? her boyfriend is ran haitani for fucks sake !!

y/n who puts her pretty feet painted white on ran’s dashboard as she mindlessly scrolls on instagram.

“rannn, do you think this would look good on me ?” you ask as you show the older haitani the most basic dress ever with a big smile plastered over your face.

“baby..that dress is so plain and simple for $2000.” he chuckles as he eyes the short black wool and silk dior dress on your cracked iphone 14 pro max. “and when did you crack your phone love ? i just bought it two months ago.”

you huff and pout as you lean back into the black seat of his luxury car. “so you’re saying it’d be ugly on me ?” you roll your eyes and continue, “and its the screen protector idiot.”

“i didnt say that love, anything looks good on you. i just dont think its worth that price.” ran mutters.

“whatever ran, im still going to buy it” you roll your eyes again while putting the dress in your cart, along with the DIOR ADDICT LIP GLOW OIL and some simple red bottom heels to match the dress. 

ran haitani who would definitely buy his girlfriend skims okay ?

you never have any luck with skims drops, as if anyone ever does. so you find yourself constantly complaining to ran about how what you want is never in stock or everything being sold out before you can even get to it. honestly, you weren’t TELLING ran to buy you skims, you were just complaining about the unfortunate situation thats been happening for months and months with each drop.  so when you and ran haitani left another bonten meeting at a bonten owned club, he told you about how he had a surprise awaiting you at your shared penthouse.

a series of “rannnn, what is it ? will you tell me please ?” flooded his ears during the car ride home that he simply smiled and answered with a simple “you’ll see.”

uppon arrival you see two large delivery boxes sitting upon the doorstep and you question what it could be. ran carries them inside with ease. ran removes his shoes after taking the boxes inside and tells you to sit infront of him and open the packages. you look at him with a puzzled face but nonetheless, you open the first box.

anticipation kills you as you remove the loads of packing peanuts and tissue to finally see a clear bag that says “SKIMS” on it and you almost pass out. 

“babeee” you look at him with puppydog eyes “did you really ? is all of this for me” you look at him as hes pouring some tequila into a clear glass with a cigarette between his lips. he looks at you, winks, and tells you to try everything on for him. of course, the first set you try on for him is the “fits everybody micro thong” and the “fits everybody micro triangle barlette.”

hi pookies, first post ig :3 this is the first “fanfic” i’ve written ig (?) lmk how i did and should i write a nsfw part 2 ? idk !! ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

[idkfitememate]

OMGGGGGG ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Idk when I saw your reply I just started giggling like an idiot

Like— it’s the first time a writer I like has responded to me 🥹

I feel so appreciated????

N e waaayysss~

I’m glad to know I’m on the right track with the mora but would you look at that?

It looks like mora won the poll!

I’m really excited to see how it’s gonna go like I think it’ll be so funny— like imagine Zhongli — no… he’s dirt poor— imagine Mona opening her purse to see her last mora just for it to start floating and fly away— even better if she’s in liyue at the moment and Chongyun sees it and rushes after to exorcise mora!reader and it’s just us frantically floating away with chongyun and shenhe and probably Hu Tao chasing after us and then Zhongli sees us and he’s just wondering wtf is going on like “I didn’t make that”

Kinda like that one sound like imagine:

Zhongli is enjoying a cup of tea and he looks out the window down at the pier and then a golden spec whizzes past with chongyun, shenhe and Hu tao hot on its trail— Zhongli at a loss for words — for once —

And then we have Mona in the background crying about her lost mora

I…am not—

I WOKE UP IN A NEW BUGATTI—

okay…. 😟

This world is a wretched place stay safe pookie <3

Eat food, drink water and get lots of rest

And live life to its fullest — it’s short anyways 😒

Take care of yourself!

—Honey Anon—

My dear as much as it disappoints me to say… the poll remains open for a few more days. But! Now I know that Mora!Reader is ahead! ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱

On that same note, I’m the first to ever respond to you? Well I am honored! I’m happy I could bring you happiness, as that is my goal with this blog! ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

I will continue to take care of myself (no matter how hard-) and implore you do the same! ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა

Also, that imagining is honestly hilarious-

[sanest-bsd-delegate]

Driver's seat

Headcanon: Where your car insurance finally paid off ft Atsushi, Ranpo and Akutagawa. Masterlist Please look at the request rules in masterlist before requesting.

Atsushi:

It all started when you both were discussing random stuff.

You brought up how your brother taught you how to drive.

THE LOOK HE GAVE, FELT LIKE HE WAS LISTENING THE WORD DRIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME. (Oh right he is an orphan eheh)

"Drive..?" YEah CLUELESS

And being Y/N, You forced him to learn how to drive.

I mean it was your duty to make him learn these type of things.

"So, this is a car" "Y/N I may be a orphan but I did know basic human terms" oops

You made sure he was seated, had his belt bucked and stuff.

"Ohk so, here is the steering wheel, its used to handle the way the care tires move....." TOO MUCH OVERSHARING

"Y/N are you sure its safe to drive in Kunikida's car?"

"Let me show you how its done Atsushi-Kun"

"Ummm" BRO STOP SHOWING OFF YOU BROKE KUNIKIDA'S CAR-

Needless to say, you weren't allowed to get near transportation again without supervision.

Welps, Atsushi, to say was still confused.

"Do you know how to ride a bike?" "Yess....?"

Oh boi this could be a disaster.

Ranpo:

I don't even know why you decided to teach him

He legit cant even ride a bus by himself and you expect him to drive.

"Ranpo! NO!" Ahh yes, he was totally hitting your car to the pole right now

"RANPO! You cant eat while driving!!" "Aww Then i rather travel with a transport"

He said that and just unbuckled himself and left the car. Without having the parking breaks up.

Lets just day, you had to pay the fine for destroying public facilities.

Hey! Least your insurance paid off.

Later you thought he could least drive properly in those car area at the amusement park.

Welp you both are banned there now

But god, Ranpo driving those cars was cute. (please someone draw it, so I can rest in peace)

Akutagawa:

You found out his inability to drive when you were running away from the explosion behind you.

"Akutagawa! You bring the car here so that we can run away! in the meantime I will hold the explosion off with my ability"

Bro just used rashomon to lift the car and throw it from Midair.

You both survived, just with minor burns and organ damage. YUP TOTALLY FINE

"DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? I ASKED YOU TO BRING THE CAR" "And i brought it" "NO LIKE DRIVE"

That moment you got to know, He doesn't know how to drive.

WELP HEAL FAST.

You were the people of Port Mafia. Naturally you are Rich as hell.

WELL HERE WE GO AND WAKE UP IN THE NEW BUGATTI (idk guys i forgot to frame correct meme sentences)

"This is a waste of time" "WELL TYSM I DONT LIKE MY LIFE TO END BECAUSE MY PARTNER DOESNT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE"

He was shaking while trying to adjust to the seat and the steering wheel and stuff.

"Are you scared?" "No this is just a waste of my time"

He tries to get out of the car. Tries. Seat belt to the rescue.

And now, without even trying to learn, He absolutely removes himself with his ability.

"HEY I COULD HAVE GOTTEN KILLED" "You lived"

Bro just hates cars.

He rather ride his horse then drive a car.

"You just DESTROYED MY CAR" "I don't see it at a concern considering you never use it"

Now Akutagawa destroys cars till date.

[glittter-vamp]

A convo between OIFL Joe and CW Joe

OIFL Joe: idk why but my girl who isn’t really my girl but I like to think she is my girl wants me to give her some space but I love to cuddle every second. She is furious why I bought her a Bugatti and a castle for us to live together. I want to drive her everywhere but she declined. I even tried to buy her a private island for us to vacation on, but she smacked me. I got us a cute dog that we can take care of and she had the audacity to tell me that we didn’t go on a proper date so she wants me to stop love bombing her. So then I got us a goat to take care of instead and she is pissed.

CW Joe: My actual girl wants people to know that we are together. However I want to keep her a secret for now. She wants to move in with me, but I declined. Even though she is always staying at my place.

OIFL Joe: There’s nothing wrong with hiding and being secretive. You should be able to hide her and she should understand why. If anything you can pay her rent.

CW Joe: I offered and she said no. I told her I need time more time and I need to talk to my publicist. Women are complicated.

OIFL Joe: how long have you guys dated?

CW Joe: 4 years

OIFL Joe: hmmm that’s not enough time at all

CW Joe: that’s what I am saying! I need another four more years to really think if I want to hold hands with her as we are walking down the street.

OIFL Joe: I feel you! But I cannot resist making out with my girl in public. She gets mad at me at times because people have been calling the Cincinnati Slut but I told her I have urges that I cannot control. I am scared if people think I am a manwhore though.

CW Joe: that’s my main issue! I cannot imagine what people would say once they find out I have a girlfriend. I really want to value my privacy.

OIFL Joe: I like to value my privacy but not my girl’s privacy. So I feel you. But people are saying so much about us such as we are dating swimsuit models, Patrick Mahomes is better than us, we are dumb without our appendix, and people make fun of our grey jeans all the time.

CW Joe: its different though because I want to keep my personal life very separate from my professional life.

OIFL Joe: I understand. You did negative things wrong here and I hope your girl comes around being hidden.

CW Joe: Thank you! I hope your girl is okay with you buying her expensive stuff she doesn’t need.

OIFL Joe: Thank you! Speaking of that, I need to stop by Chanel and buy her 50 bags.

CW Joe: Why does she need 50 bags?

OIFL Joe: I don’t like the bag she uses from Walmart so I thought I can get her 50 from Chanel. However she gets upset when I make fun of her Walmart bag. I want to buy her 50 different colors too!

CW Joe: Women are so needy!

OIFL Joe: Agreed

I AM SCREAMIMG 😭😭😭

This is so fucking funny, I love it 😂

[rasairui]

Like (hopefully)obviously I'm not doing an "ooh I'm poor so I shouldn't have to help anyone" and I already knew most mutual aid is a bunch of poor people passing scraps back and forth. But like... Why. Why is it like that. A lot of my friends are five feet from homelessness and going hungry on a good day. Every single day for years I see people online desperately begging for money so they can eat or keep their house or pay for medical care etc. etc. and it was already maddening. But now we're a year into a fucking genocide and it still feels like primarily the strugglers who are giving. And idk I just feel fucking crazy to see rich people who could do something. Who could make a dent in escape funds or even just fucking pay for them outright and idk! I'm sure there are real charities and people funding them but it's hard to have faith in that when I come online and see someone's cancer treatment is primarily being funded by people living paycheck to paycheck. Someone's escape fund being setback because they need to replace their tent and bedding and clothes. This one is on the verge of eviction and has only eaten plain tortillas today. This one has 4 sick kids with no access to decent food or running water.

I know I'm not saying anything concise or revolutionary but the more I see the angrier I get. My country sends billions of dollars to Isreal but everyday regular people here are barely living. There was a massive fucking hurricane here but fuck those people I guess. The government funds suffering. The rich fund suffering. They love it they love misery. Somewhere is a billionaire with 4 houses who could singlehandedly help so many people and still live their life the same. But I look over at someone with diabetes who can barely afford insulin and they give $5 even though even that could put them at risk. And I know guilt isn't inherently moral but I feel guilt for being unemployed and unable to give much if anything and I just cannot wrap my head around the idea of having so much fucking money and feeling absolutely nothing! These people SHOULD feel guilty! You could change someone's life, you could SAVE someone's life all on your own and you just won't? And you don't care? Like that's not an idea that you feel good about, knowing you could save someone? And again I knoww I'm not saying anything new and I'm definitely not saying it better. And I don't think the poor should stop trying to help, or that it means less when they do. It absolutely does add up and the efforts of hundreds of poor people are nothing to scoff at. But it makes me insane that it's the people who are already struggling trying harder and risking more than some bitch who's off to buy bugatti #7 but we're selfish and irresponsible with money even though the rent will be unaffordable regardless of the $5 we give to somebody else. Aren't you angry? Aren't you exhausted? There is so much horrific suffering in this world that could be solved so easily but it won't happen because the people who can just don't fucking care and the longer I live the more homicidal I get about it.

I anyone else getting like. Idk just increasingly ravenously furious with people who've got money

[bontens-new-executive]

The type of boyfriend to,

Kill and beat up anyone who even dares to touch you or talk badly about you. If he hears anyone talk shit about you, or spread rumors. Man's is out the door, on his merry way to end that lowlife.

Will buy you an expensive car. He doesn't care which brand. You want a Lamborghini? You get a Lamborghini. You want a Bugatti? You'll get your Bugatti. Maybe you want a McLaren? Why not get all three?

You're not into cars and instead fashion and make up? No problem. You need the newest collection of any type of make up brand? No matter how expensive, he's got it. You wanna go shopping and spend hundreds or thousands? He will just give you his card and code and off you go, spend whatever amount you want. He's got the money for it.

Gifts you diamond necklaces every now and again to decorate your pretty neck, to let people know you're his. You have at least one type of jewelry to fit every single one of your outfits.

Hes very picky with choosing a partner. So when he does choose one, which is you, he's willing to go all out. He'll make you live that rich life, giving you all you ever wanted and more.

At any given moment you're with him. Sitting on his lap while one arm is around you and the other on your thigh. If anyone looks at his pretty baby the wrong way, he'll make out with you on the spot. Gotta show youre his, besides, nobody will ever have a chance with you while he's around.

Calls you "doll" or "angel" and adds " pretty" before every pet name he uses. " pretty little thing" "my pretty baby"

When jealous (because you're talking to aome unimportant peasant), he'll walk up behind you, grab your throat to turn your face towards him, and sloppily make out with you. Having you moan loudly against his lips for the other to hear.

-

Ran haitani, bonten mikey, rindou Haitani, kokonoi hajime, hanma shuji, sanzu Haruchiyo, takeomi akashi, wakasa imaushi, kuroo tetsurou, Tsukishima kei, Atsumu miya, (kinda ushijima and kageyama too idk) iwaizumi hajime

[scanning]

are teslas not expensive?

like it’s marketed as a luxury car and in terms of luxury cars imo they’re not that expensive like in aud you can get a model s for like 60k...like u pay that for a toyota. small cars are cheap af like hyundais r cheap because theyre tiny. teslas are sedans and suvs they arent small cars u get for like 15k

[okcat]

Pls let’s make a prayer circle for big body Bugatti Chansung he goes thru so much in this group: farted on, Taec’s babysitter, junho’s punching bag etc. he’s a just a big softie plus he can cook & has an infectious laugh 😘 (also I’m the anon who sent the first ask about big body Bugatti Chansung and how Khun is 80% legs… my mind is too powerful I fear 🤯) also how did you not notice khun’s legs lemme submit some pics

I'm obsessed with his laugh it makes me also laugh even tho his face is scary when he does bc it doesnt move 😭😭😭 AND UR A LEGEND cant wait to find out what names you'll come up with for other members 😌 about khun tho idk I'm just a dumbass who didnt pay attention ig djsjhsj plz do send me pics of daddy long legs khun moments tho

[edencallsme]

Can you make a bullet list of all your OC’s and brief description of them🥺🥺

Ooooh boy, I hope you know what you're asking for. Get ready for a bunch of robo cuties.

Oldest OCs to Newest

Nightingale: My first ever Transformers OC! She's a quiet, battle-hardened Neutral femme with a soft spot for children of all species. Her background is a bit complicated, but long story short, she's used to be human but some jerks ruined that for her and made her into a Cybertronian-like battle mecha. Her design is actually based off TFP Soundwave; slim and pretty with a black and purple paintjob. Being a triplechanger, she has two alt-modes: a Blackbird and a Bugatti. (IDK how to know cars.)

Daybreaker: Nightingale's partner and trusted companion! A friendly, soft-spoken former Autobot, now turned Neutral. In Wandering Knights (which is the TF story that they're in), he's the co-captain of an Autobot explorer ship that crashed on Earth and lost his memory on impact. He met Nightingale when she broke him out of the jail cell he was in, and both escaped of the Labs together. Daybreaker has a very knight-like appearance, making him the butt of many knight-in-shining-armor jokes. Though not a triplechanger, his alt-mode is basically the Regalia from FF13 which is literally a flying car.

Daze: Another neutral human-turned-cybertronian! They're suave and charming with the slightest hint of a mischievous streak. Daze just one day woke up as a giant robot and is like "alright cool", before running off and doing whatever their spark desires. Their hobbies includes messing with the Autobots, messing with the Decepticons, flirting with the local Prime, and hanging out with their human haggle of dramatic theater children. Daze has the special ability to make this poisonous and acidic fog, which made many Bots' and Cons' plating rust. Their alt-mode is a really sexy-looking customized Lamborghini with a pink, gold, and black paintjob.

Comet: Autobot scout and space explorer extraordinaire! A very hyperactive and easily excitable femme with a spark of gold. Her high energy and intense love of space tends to overwhelm the other Autobots, so she spends all of that excitement on doing patrol rounds and mapping out star systems. Her background is pretty simple: she's from Caminus and just absolutely adores her big sis Windblade (they're not actually sisters, just really good friends), so when she hears that Windblade is gonna join the Autobots, Comet quickly followed and is now an essential member of the Ark! Her alt-mode is a small but fast starship with a simple white, cyan, and yellow paintjob.

Aurelius: A Neutral war medic who's the leader of a small rescue team called the Starsworn. Calm, gentle, and level-headed: this mech has very leader-like vibes to him. But despite his caring behavior and excellent medical skills, a lot of people don't know his backstory, not even his own team (sshhhh, I totally have a background for him *sweats*). Aurelius' alt-mode is a heavy-duty, white and red truck with a big trailer for hauling injured mecha in.

Drivebright: My latest Transformers OC, and the most baby of them all! Drivebright is an Autobot scout just like Comet and Bumblebee! The youngest of all the Autobots, Drivebright's cheerful and optimistic personality is like a breeze of fresh air to those war-torn Bots, and makes a lot of Bots coddle the young scout. His backstory is pretty long, but I'll make it short. Drivebright is one of the last remaining protoforms batch that the Allspark made before briefly yeeting off to deep space. As a way to protect the young spark, Optimus Prime puts Drivebright at one of the Autobot bases in Iacon, where Drivebright trains with the rest of his batch-members. However, a Decepticon airstrike unfortunately bombed the place and left Drivebright one of the five remaining survivors. Now, Drivebright has PTSD and a great fear of explosions. :) And oh yeah, Drivebright's alt-mode is a teal and light blue Volkswagen Beetle like Bumblebee's!

I actually have a whole lot more of Transformers OCs, both human and Cybertronian. But these guys are my main ones that I've fully written for. I hope y'all enjoy my info-dumping, it was fun for me, lol.

[realcleverissues]

Bob is close to retirement. He has invested most of his savings in a very rare and valuable old car, a Bugatti, which he has not been able to insure. The Bugatti is his pride and joy. In addition to the pleasure he gets from driving and caring for his car, Bob knows that its rising market value means that he will always be able to sell it and live comfortably after retirement. One day when Bob is out for a drive, he parks the Bugatti near the end of a railway siding and goes for a walk up the track. As he does so, he sees that a runaway train, with no one aboard, is running down the railway track. Looking farther down the track, he sees the small figure of a child very likely to be killed by the runaway train. He can't stop the train and the child is too far away to warn of the danger, but he can throw a switch that will divert the train down the siding where his Bugatti is parked. Then nobody will be killed -- but the train will destroy his Bugatti... and the financial security it represents.

Should bob pull the lever?

This is a paraphrased version of Peter Unger’s example of the trolley problem which he formulated several decades ago. And while many people would look at this and wonder, “what kind of question is this? Of course you save the kid?!” Unger forces us to take a step further and then ask: Ok, then shouldn’t we consider selling our fancy cars, fancy homes, fancy boats - or even our regular cars, homes, and, idk stamp collections - to save lives of those who will undoubtedly die due to lack of funds (e.g. poverty)?

If you rightly recognize the horror of valuing some commodities over human life, then how can most of us justify how we live? How can we justify our wealth and luxuries when people are dying?

I think there are some good arguments for why the above proposition is perhaps not as strong as it may seem. But I ain’t sharing them*, bc everyone should consider this question and ask themselves why we aren’t doing more, and feel this question burn inside them for at least a short while.

Also, in light of the above, I want you to consider whether it makes ethical sense for 3 people in the USA to own as much wealth as the entire bottom half of the population when there are people in the US (and across the world) dying from lack of food, water, medicine, and other basic needs.

*P.s. Ok, I partially lied. For those looking for some more insight on this, good piece by Peter Singer on it here, though there are a variety of approaches to this question.

Also, some caveats about this trolley scenario: a) Bob’s car is uninsured. b) bob does not know for sure that pulling the switch will work. c) He’s too far away to warn the girl. (doodle is not to scale). d) Bob doesn’t know the girl (we could even say that bob somehow knows for sure that the girl is visiting from abroad)

[sonderei]

I got bored and answered one of those 100-questions things so if you ever wanted to know a stupid amount of useless information about me read on, otherwise enjoy whatever content is in the next post!

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? my room is a mess, the rest of the apartment is pretty clean

what color are your eyes? brown

do you like your name? why? its grown on me. I used to get teased a lot in school “hey Ariel, where’s your best friend Flounder??” but now I work on Disney property and it’s on my name tag so I get to make a lot of kids (and adults) happy

what is your relationship status? been dating a small mess of a person for 4 years, whom I love dearly 

describe your personality in 3 words or less basically a cat

what color hair do you have? brown, or like a really dirty blonde if I spend enough time in the sun

what kind of car do you drive? color? a black 2013 hyundai accent hatchback (named Jazz)

where do you shop? where I shop: target, forever21, H&M, BoxLunch, Garage where I’d LIKE to shop: ModCloth, ASOS

how would you describe your style? I once bought an oversized Polariod windbreaker and I wear it everywhere I can??? I also love passive aggressive crop tops (”no thanks”) I wore it to a mandatory meeting at work at 9am and any time my managers asked me a question I just pointed to my shirt. So idk that should tell you something

favorite social media account I think I enjoy Instagram and Tumblr equally?

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? one full brother (5 years younger), one half brother on my dad’s side (13 years younger), and one half sister on my mom’s side (18 years younger). 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? idk because I haven’t traveled anywhere I’d actually like to live. I love the idea of living northwest US (Seattle, Portland) or in NZ or like Scotland or somewhere with beautiful scenery but like...never been so can’t say for sure?

favorite snapchat filter? flower crown

favorite makeup brand(s) NYX is pretty much all I use but I also do like bare minimum with my makeup

how many times a week do you shower? typically every other day unless I’m super gross

favorite tv show? too hard. Steven Universe, Game of Thrones, A:TLA, and Adventure Time?

shoe size? 7-8 depending on who makes them

how tall are you? smol. Like 5′3″ or so? 

sandals or sneakers? sneakers, unless going somewhere involving water and/or sand

do you go to the gym? nah. I’m up and down stairs at least 20 times a day, usually while carrying stuff. that’s my exercise.

describe your dream date sitting in front of the Ocean Voyager exhibit at the Georgia Aquarium all day. like literally that’s it. and my date lets me without asking to move on, and ideally enjoys it as much as I do.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? uhhh like $25 because that’s how much you have to have to open a new bank account which I’ve been meaning to do for like two weeks now

what color socks are you wearing? not wearing any, but I was wearing shark socks all day

how many pillows do you sleep with? just one, super soft and squishy

do you have a job? what do you do? I'm a server at a restaurant in Disney Springs at Walt Disney World. Its challenging and often frustrating and stressful but I get to meet some really cool people so it evens out. (Pat Sajak from Wheel of Fortune was in last week, I didn’t ask him if I could buy a vowel because I have some dignity)

how many friends do you have? like true friends, would drop everything for me if I asked them / needed them to? I’d say 3. But my social group is like...maybe 10 people? That I actively try to hang out with semi regularly.

whats the worst thing you have ever done? I honestly don’t even know. I forgot a woman’s ketchup last week at work and apparently I ruined her entire Disney vacation so

whats your favorite candle scent? usually anything with jasmine, so long as it isn’t overpowering

3 favorite boy names Nathaniel, Sebastian, Milo 

3 favorite girl names Riley, Maisie, Phoebe

favorite actor? robert downey jr probs

favorite actress? tessa thompson?

who is your celebrity crush? ugh. tom holland, tessa thompson, rdj? 

favorite movie? Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to, before I worked at a bookstore. For some reason that killed my love for reading. But favorite books were the Bartimaeus Trilogy and Abarat.

money or brains? brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? Skip (long story short, its a Cabin Pressure reference because I’ve always wanted to be a pilot)

how many times have you been to the hospital? for myself? 5? maybe 6?

top 10 favorite songs in no particular order Evolve by Phoria Put ‘Em Up by Priority Cleopatra by The Lumineers Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man Miracle by CHVRCHES Dissolve by Absofacto Taro by alt-J Lavender by Two Door Cinema Club Dinosaurs by The Maccabees Ambling Alp by Yeasayer

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) ehh a bit on the oily side

what is your biggest fear? losing the ones I love

how many kids do you want? NONE ZERO NADA ZIP ZILCH FUCK NO

whats your go to hair style? pull it back, messy bun if possible

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) a p small apartment (but not tiny, I think it’s like 800-900 sq ft)

who is your role model? Steve Irwin

what was the last compliment you received? a guest at one of my tables told me I looked like one of the recent Bond girls

what was the last text you sent? bailing on a few friends who were going to Blizzard Beach because I was exhausted from having my dad in town for the last two days so I wanted to sleep

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? like 2 or 3. not very old

what is your dream car? realistic? a nice Subaru or Audi. Maybe a Tesla unrealistic? bugatti veyron

opinion on smoking? cigarettes? ew gross not around me also poor life choices weed? don’t care, just not around me please and thanks my other half is allergic

do you go to college? I did, graduated two years ago, still haven’t done anything with my life / degree

what is your dream job? anything working directly with animals, especially marine mammals, big cats, or non-venomous reptiles

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? big city. right in the middle of it.

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? not usually, I have specific stuff I use for my hair that’s a lot nicer than the stuff at hotels

do you have freckles? not like a ton but yeah

do you smile for pictures? if I feel like it? also depends on who’s taking the picture

how many pictures do you have on your phone? I’d say somewhere in the realm of like 650-800?

have you ever peed in the woods? yep, used to go camping a lot as a kid

do you still watch cartoons? hell yeah, I usually prefer them to anything else. Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Voltron, A:TLA, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends...that shit is my jam

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? mmmm Wendys but I usually don’t get c nugs from anywhere

Favorite dipping sauce? chick fil a sauce or ranch

what do you wear to bed? just underwear

have you ever won a spelling bee? no but I came close in middle school

what are your hobbies? not many tbh. I have a few reptiles that I take care of. I collect / trade Disney pins. I love swimming but don’t do it all that often. Uhhh...seeing how many times I can ride Kilamonjaro Safari in a row before the cast members begin to judge me?

can you draw? not really, no

do you play an instrument? nope, I can’t even read music and I can barely hum

what was the last concert you saw? uhhhh...I think Death Cab for Cutie and CHVRCHES?

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Starbucks for drinks, Dunkin for food (donutssssss)

do you want to get married? yeah, eventually. I told the SO that ideally before I’m 30 and that we’re not having a wedding but we’re gonna elope instead because fuck weddings I don’t have the money for that or the patience to plan it

what is your crush’s first and last initial? not really a crush but more of a “current-and-potentially-forever life partner” but DU

are you going to change your last name when you get married? no idea. D wants to change their last name but idk if they’d take mine or they’d just change it to their middle name and then I’d take that? honestly it doesn’t really matter to me each way so long as I don’t get their current last name (because of bad associations)

what color looks best on you? no idea honestly. I prefer dark, muted blues?

do you miss anyone right now? my parents and siblings, and two of my best friends

do you sleep with your door open or closed? open, otherwise the cats would never let us sleep

do you believe in ghosts? nah, not really. I grew up in a town that had a bunch of history and by extension ghost stories, so it was more a part of “tourist culture” than something that seemed legitimate to me

what is your biggest pet peeve? I never know until someone starts doing it around me. but uhhhh I hate loud chewers, people that refuse to even try to see your side of an argument, and when you’re sitting somewhere in public like on a bench or something and there’s plenty of other empty seating options nearby and yet someone comes up and sits RIGHT NEXT TO YOU nope you know what that’s it I fucking hate that and it happens to me all the time at Disney

last person you called` I think my mom?

favorite ice cream flavor? cookies and cream, unless I’m at one of those places where you can basically make your own flavor in which case I will ALWAYS do a rose-infused ice cream with pistachios 

regular oreos or golden oreos? please don’t make me choose

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow!

what shirt are you wearing? not wearing one ;)

what is your phone background? just a basic stock photo of some ferns. kinda boring but I like simple backgrounds

are you outgoing or shy? its pretty even but if I had to say one over the other I’m probably slightly more outgoing than I am shy.

do you like it when people play with your hair? only people I know and allow. don’t just come up and start playing with my hair unless you KNOW that I’d be okay with it

do you like your neighbors? haven’t met them! we moved in like a month ago but we still haven’t seen anyone that lives on our floor

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? if I remember, but honestly I’m really bad about doing it unless I’m in the shower in which case it’s every time I take a shower

have you ever been high? nope

have you ever been drunk? sadly no. I have a ridiculously high natural alcohol tolerance, so I get sick to my stomach before I can even manage tipsy.

last thing you ate? pizzaaaaaaa

favorite lyrics right now idek and that’s a lot of effort so sorry here’s me “free pass” I’m using it on this question next

summer or winter? ugh winter always I can’t stand the heat there’s only so many layers you can take off

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? milk or white. milk for straight eating, white for flavoring other things

favorite month? october

what is your zodiac sign leo!

who was the last person you cried in front of? my significant other

[spideyydarling]

1-64 =u=

FYDGIUH*ORW OKAY I DESERVED THAT

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? only all the fucking time, like, lets be honest.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? i would say 2

3. The person you would never want to meet? an evil psycho villain 

4. What is your favorite word? crisp (when u say it it travels from the back to the front of your mouth, its pretty trippy

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? acacia because it sounds pretty and looks dope

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? my hair is looking goooood wtf??

7. What shirt are you wearing? a grey singlet (tank top)

8. What do you label yourself as? idk a geek, nerd, introvert, fucking awesome

9. Bright room or dark room? BRIGHT

10. What were you doing at midnight last night? watching stackie compilations which are funny as fuck

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? none

12. Who told you they loved you last? my beautiful mother

13. Your worst enemy? um, like, no one? otherwise myself

14. What is your current desktop picture? oh god okay: @bbparker​

15. Do you like someone? tom frickin’ holland baby

16. The last song you listened to? sweet things - twin peaks

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? NO ONE WTF WHO WOULD CREATE SUCH A THING, nah jk thanos that fat ugly thing

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? again, thanos that twat

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? the queen and give me a bunch of money and do good deeds like attempt to end world hunger and help people trying to stop global warming yeah

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) my collarbones lmao 

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? i would look mighty handsome and i would be really famous and stand up for women because if a smashing looking young lad was like “women are fucking magnificent they deserve equality and respect”everyone would be like HELL YEAS

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? if i hold my hands behind my back i can move them to the front without them breaking apart because im double jointed YEET

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? im afraid of not being able to escape the inevitable 

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. a big ass meatball sub from subway hell yes

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? food probs

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? NEW YORK BABYYYY or LONDON WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? um, im underage???? but i would say pina colads they sound nice

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? i am the ruler no one can de-throne me unless i choose them

29. What is your favorite expletive? WANKER

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? the little prince- its a beautiful book

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? probably my aunt that died, that was horrible, still is

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! New York or London 

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? my aunty

34. What was your last dream about? drinking tea then spiderman whipped by my house, like doin der

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? yep, yes i have rip

37. Have you ever built a snowman? IT DOESNT SNOW IN AUS SO NO

38. What is the color of your socks? blackkkkk

39. What type of music do you like? indie, indie rock, classical, hip hop, anything but country

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? sunrise yes

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? VANILAAAAAA

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) i know nothing of american but aussie footy? i got for the south sydney rabbithoes 

43. Do you have any scars? many, everywhere, im a fckn clutz

44. What do you want to be when you graduate? i dont know and its scaring me, i just want to be famous and dress in really cool outfits

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? i would want to be famous

46. Are you reliable? i mean, depends

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? are you famous yet

48. Do you hold grudges? yes? no? kind of? youll never know

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? thats a bit dangerous but probably a peacock and an elephant OR crocodile.

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? i have so many i dont even know

51. Are you a good liar? yes i am bitch, yes i am

52. How long could you go without talking? a while, when im alone i never talk, thats a lie, i talk to myself. idk but a while

53. What has been you worst haircut/style? THIS FUCKING CHICK OKAY, I SAID I WANTED MY HAIR JUST ABOVE SHOULDER LENGTH AND A FRINGE AND SHE CUT IT ABOUVE MY FUCKING JAW AND MY FRINGE WAS LITERALLY JUST A LINE HALFWAY BETWEEN MY FACE FEGUEIGHUIW I RAGE 

54. Have you ever baked your own cake? YES i bake cakes all the time and just eat them

55. Can you do any accents other than your own? i mean i can do a damn good english and a decent american i would say

56. What do you like on your toast? nothing, Vegemite, reeces peanut butter spread

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? a face

58. What would be you dream car? bugatti veyron

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. yes i sing in the shower, i also like to do the splits in the shower honestly idk either

60. Do you believe in aliens? I DONT BELIEVE, I KNOW

61. Do you often read your horoscope? sometimes 

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? L

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? Dinos 

64. What do you think about babies? get them AWAY