#idk i thought i could use it to get into tiny space but Nope | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

babyboibucky · 4 years ago

Text

Promises, promises

Pairing: AU!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You believed that promises are meant to be broken but Bucky always proved you wrong. Until one day, he proved you right.

Word Count: 6,555 (oops I got carried away lol)

Warnings: Angst, a tiny bit of self-doubt but with a happy ending!!!

A/N: Some tags aren’t working, damn u tumblr! Anyway enjoy the angst and the shitty writing lmfao. Also kinda want to do ficlets for these two??? Like short fics about the happenings in their relationship, their first date, how they dealt with the break up idk, lemme know if anyone’s interested in that xoxo

MAIN MASTERLIST

It's been four and a half years since Bucky broke up with you and honestly, you're fine now. Fine, as in you've moved on from him and that you haven't been stalking his Instagram account anymore or have been asking Steve how he's doing since the break up. You're fine now, really.

There was not an ounce of denial left in your body after almost two years of pining and self-blame. But that doesn't mean you've forgotten the pain he caused you when he woke up one day and realized that he didn't need you anymore.

Forgive and forget they often told you and you badly wanted to do so. But it wasn't that easy to do, not when you still feel the pain as if it only happened yesterday.

"What did you say?" your forehead creased as you walked around the kitchen counter, quickly approaching Bucky who had his back to you as he stood in the living room of your shared apartment.

You weren't sure if you heard him right, or if he actually said anything. Perhaps you were just hearing things? Just this morning he woke up and greeted you with his charming smile before pressing a soft peck on your lips. You had cooked breakfast together, laughed together and even talked about what to have for dinner.

Sure, something about his demeanor earlier was a bit off, but you assumed it had something to do about his work and not because he wanted to break up with you.

Right?

"Bucky, what did you say?" you pressed when Bucky remained quiet; he didn't even turn around to face you.

He heaved out a deep sigh, "I said I need space." he murmured.

"What do you mean, Buck?" you asked again, voice small and shaky as you fidgeted with the hem of your shirt.

Of course you knew what exactly Bucky meant by that, but you didn't want to believe it. You were hopeful that maybe this was one of those petty fights you used to have, one where Bucky would spend the night over at Steve's. He'll come around the next day, he always does that. You always woke up to him whispering apologies to your ear and you would say your sorry too.

Bucky rubbed his face with his hand before finally turning to you, "I can't do this anymore." he said, shaking his head before averting his gaze to the floor.

He must have seen the look in your eyes when he faced you. As much as you believed that you were pretty good at hiding your emotions, it never worked on Bucky. He was the only person who could always read you; you could never hide from him.

"Bucky, I don't understand." you let out a nervous chuckle as you hugged yourself, biting your lower lip to prevent them from quivering as you held back the urge to cry.

Bucky rubbed the back of his neck, "I just...you've been too...fuck, I don't know how to say this without hurting you. I really don't want to." he admitted dejectedly, looking up at you.

You scoffed, "Just fucking say it, Bucky. I'm already hurt just by having this conversation." you told him.

"You're too good for me. Way too good."

Bucky’s words echoed in your mind again as you laid your eyes on him, four and a half years after your break-up. And just like that, you were back to square one.

You did your best to avoid him after he left, you felt like Bucky too tried to do the same. It was harder than you thought, given that you belonged to the same circle of friends. There were missed birthday parties, anniversaries and get togethers. If you knew Bucky was going to be there, you’d bail. Thank god you had a bunch of understanding friends who never took your absences against you.

But an engagement party between two of your friends? Now that was something you wouldn’t want to miss out on.

You’ve been really happy for quite a while now, to the point that it never crossed your mind that Bucky would surely be attending as well. He had been out of your system since the day you decided to move past him, which is why you thought that you were finally a-okay.

Tonight proved you wrong because as you watched Bucky smile and greet your friends, you realized that you still wanted to punch him and hurt him and tell him that you were still in lo—

“Hi.”

You were too focused on daydreaming about how you wanted to hurt Bucky that you failed to notice that he made his way to you and was now waiting for you to greet him back.

Bucky was smiling at you the same way he did on the night you first met at a college house party. You and Bucky have been together for that long.

“Hi.”

The music was too loud that you missed out on the stranger’s greeting, if not for his shadow looming over your hunched figure as you sat on the staircase, you would’ve completely ignored him.

The guy was looking down at you with a charming smile that made your cheeks turn pink. He was tall and slightly muscular, something you noticed right off the bat all thanks to the tight red henley he was sporting. The guy had long hair too, but it was tied back into a low man bun that was messy enough to leave tendrils of stray hair to frame his handsome face.

“Hi.” He repeated with a chuckle, a hint of amusement laced in his tone as he bit his lip at the sight of you just staring up at him.

“Hi?” You stammered awkwardly.

He laughed, “Um, can I pass through or is there some sort of password required?”

You realized that you had been blocking his way, everyone’s way actually. Quickly, you apologized and stood up to leave your spot only for the guy to block your way before you could even hop off of the last step of the staircase.

Thinking that you must have confused him and the direction you intended to go, you murmured a soft apology again before sidestepping him but to no avail. You looked up at him with a frown when you noticed that he was intentionally blocking your way.

It didn’t help that he was way taller than you. Despite the one being on the last step of the staircase, the guy still loomed over you.

“Excuse me?” You snapped and tried to move past him but he was way bigger than you and managed to stop you from passing through.

He had a cheeky smile on as he watched your futile attempt to squeeze your way out of his large body. You huffed out when he held onto the rail while his other hand on the wall, completely trapping you on the staircase.

“What’s the password?” He asked, still grinning at you.

You deadpanned, “Are you kidding me?”

He shook his head, “Nope.”

You stared at him blankly before glancing at his hands, observing whether you had a chance at prying them away from where they held on. It was then that you noticed how his left hand was covered in tattoos. The sleeve of his henley rode up quite a bit to reveal that his tattoos reached his wrist, he probably had his entire left arm sleeved with ink.

“Can I please pass?” You huffed out when you concluded that there was no way you would be able to escape him.

“Like I said, I need a password.” He insisted.

“Penis.” You stated, face free from any sort of expression.

The guy choked on his laughter, “Why would you honestly think that?” He asked incredulously.

You shrugged, “I thought you guys liked dick jokes.” You reasoned out.

The guy laughed as he shook his head, “Well, you’re not wrong.”

“It’s not the password?” You asked. “Don’t I get a hint or something, I really don’t have time for games right now. I have to go back to my dorm. I have a test tomorrow.” You told the guy.

“I can’t believe you’re thinking about a test. What’s your major anyway?” He asked.

You groaned, “Like I said, I don’t have time for games or even for a conversation. Come on, just let me pass through!”

The guy hummed as he stared at you, as if he was thinking of something. You wanted to look away but he had beautiful ocean blue eyes that you found yourself slowly getting lost in.

“I’ll give you hints.” He announced. “Two hints actually, because I’m feeling generous.”

“Okay, then. Just spit it out!” You rushed.

The guy grinned.

“The password is made up of your name followed by your number.”

“Hi.”

You blinked when Bucky repeated his greeting. When you regained your senses, you cleared your throat and simply nodded at him as acknowledgment. You saw how Bucky’s smile faltered seconds before you looked away and pretended to look for someone.

“I can’t believe you just brushed me off.” He chuckled, running his fingers through his hair.

Bucky had cut off his hair right after graduation. He sported a clean cut since then but now he had longer locks; not as long as his college hair though. It just looked fluffier, you fought the urge to imagine how it’d feel through your fingers.

“I can’t believe you just expected me to greet you as if nothing happened.” You told him, letting your eyes wander around the place.

Bucky exhaled heavily and shook his head, “I thought we’d be okay by now.” He admitted. “Guess I was wrong.”

You clicked your tongue in irritation, snapping your head into his direction after avoiding his gaze earlier. “I am okay, but that doesn’t mean I am okay with being around you.” You hissed.

“I honestly thought we’d still be friends, you know. Civil at least.”

What has gotten into Bucky’s mind for him to expect a lovely reunion between the both of you? Things didn’t end well, he just left. He was too ambitious to even think that you’d greet him with rainbows and butterflies.

“We’re not friends, Bucky. Not even acquaintances.” You told him.

Bucky opened his mouth to say something until someone tapped on the mic, announcing that the newly engaged couple, Wanda and Vis, had something to say to their guests. By the time he looked back at you, you had already walked away and joined Nat at their table.

It reminded Bucky of the days when he used to watch your back retreat into your dorm whenever he walked you home.

“So, you gonna tell me the password or what?”

You felt all your blood rush to your head and you’ve never been thankful for existence of strobe lights. You were probably red as a tomato. Who wouldn’t be anyway? This handsome dude just asked for your name and number!

“Is this a joke?” You managed to asked and thanked the heavens that you didn’t stutter.

The guy shook his head, “I don’t really joke around.” He shrugged.

“Why do you even want to know my name and number?” you curiously asked.

Bucky shrugged, “Been watching you since you arrived.”

“Creeper.” you accused.

“Hard not to when you’re the only grumpy person in a party. I know your friends dragged you here, I mean you said you have a test tomorrow and you don’t seem the type to party a day before. Besides, you’ve been keeping to yourself the entire time. Figured you might want some company, one with substance.” he boastfully wiggled his eyebrows at you.

His confidence appalled you but you were also surprised at how he seemed to have read your mind. Or personality, in general.

“Hey, Bucky!”

You watched the guy turn his head towards front door where a blonde guy— Steve from the student council, you recognized— entered. You thought it’d give you a chance to slip away but the guy, well Bucky, kept his hands in place.

“Kinda busy right now, pal. I’ll catch up with you later.” He said.

Steve’s gaze moved past Bucky until they landed on you. He chuckled as he shook his head at his friend’s antics. Steve walked away but not without acknowledging you.

“He may not seem like it, but Bucky’s a good guy. You can take my word for it.”

Bucky turned to you and lifted an eyebrow, “I mean, coming from a student council member, that’s a pretty credible source.” He said confidently.

You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from smiling. You had to admit, Bucky had a way with words and actions. His boyish charm was working on you and you hated how easily you were falling for it. And you just met the guy like ten minutes ago!

“So, what’s the password?” Bucky asked again.

You tapped your foot as you crossed your arms over your chest, “You promise to let me go if I tell you?”

Bucky made a face, “I don’t think that’s the right term because you can expect more of me once you give me the password. But I’ll definitely step aside. That’s a promise.” He reassured.

“Promises are meant to be broken.” You stated.

“Yeah, well watch me prove you wrong. Password? Pretty please?” He asked cutely and fuck, Bucky was really winning you over just like that.

Letting out a defeated sigh, you tell him your name and number. Just as he promised, Bucky stepped aside and quickly fished out his phone to type in your number. You honestly didn’t expect for him to remember it after hearing it once, but you peeked and he actually did. Impressive.

“Like I promised, off you go to study.” He said and motioned his arm towards the front door.

You sighed and offered a small smile before finally walking past him. You were about to open the front door when Bucky beat you to it.

“I told you ‘let go’ is the wrong term ‘cause I’m walking you home tonight.” Bucky said. “And tomorrow night too. And the next night and the next next night. Or afternoon. Morning? Whatever time your classes finish.”

Bucky really proved you wrong that night because he did walk you home the next night and the next next night too. It went on until he no longer had to watch you enter your dorm or apartment because eventually, the two of you ended up going to the same home.

It’s very ironic really, that it was also Bucky who failed to prove you wrong when he broke his promise not to hurt you, ever. You wondered whether it was your fault that you actually believed in him. It was hard not to though, because Bucky’s earned your trust from all the promises he made and kept.

Which is why it was even more painful when one day, he decided to break the one promise you truly held on to.

“I’ll always love you, you know that right?”

Bucky blurted it out randomly that his statement confused the hell out of you. The two of you were just playing a video game when he said it, making you hit pause.

“And where did that come from?” You asked with amusement.

Bucky frowned, “You could’ve reacted differently. I was hoping for a high-pitched ‘awwww!’ and this is what I get?” He teased, taking your chin in between his index finger and thumb to pull you close so he could bite your nose playfully.

“You said it out of the blue!” You told him with a laugh. “But it made me happy though.” You admitted and kissed his cheek.

“Yeah, well it’s true. I mean, this thing we got? It’s forever.” Bucky said and lovingly smiled at you.

You pretended to gag at his words but it was obvious that you felt like you were on cloud nine when Bucky said that. “Cheeseballs!” You teased.

“This cheeseball’s gonna put a ring on that finger one day. That’s a promise!”

A finger snapped right in front of your face, “You good?” Nat asked.

You nodded and tried your hardest not to look at Bucky. He was seated with Steve, Sam and some other guys at the table next to yours. You could feel him staring at you and it was making you anxious. Nat and Sharon exchanged looks before letting out a sigh in unison.

“Come on, I’m fine. Stop looking at me like that!” You told them with a forced chuckle.

“What did Bucky say?” Sharon asked. She’d seen Bucky approach you upon his arrival, saw the expressions you both had as you talked and knew immediately that it didn’t go well.

Nat hummed before taking a quick sip from her glass of wine, “We’ve been watching and we’re curious.”

“He was expecting for us to be friends.” You simply stated.

Nat and Sharon groaned and rolled their eyes, “What a dick.” Nat said.

“Men really do have the audacity.” Sharon laughed and shook her head.

You joined her laughter and lifted up your own glass of wine, “I’ll drink to that.” You said before finishing your drink in one go.

One glass of wine turned into two and then three and then four. Six drinks later and you were buzzed and unstoppable. You weren’t that drunk, you were good at handling alcohol but you were tipsy for sure. The formalities of the engagement party were finally done and the guests were left to mingle around.

Wanda and Vis immediately went to your table to catch up and after giving them your heartfelt congratulations (and apologies for missing out on plenty of events), you decided to step out of the venue to get some fresh air.

The silence allowed you to process your thoughts, the same thoughts you had repressed for years. You were happy for Wanda and Vis, truly. The two have been the epitome of soulmates and it was only right for them to end up tying the knot. But you also couldn’t help but wonder, would you and Bucky end up in marriage too had he decided to stay and work things out with you?

You lift up your left hand and stared at your bare ring finger. Just a few years ago, you’d been wearing a simple gold band studded with tiny diamonds around it— a promise ring. Bucky had given it as a gift on your 6th anniversary. You’d gotten together when you were just 19 and Bucky 21. People always doubted that your relationship with him wouldn’t last long given that the two of you were so different. Not to mention, Bucky had a reputation. Girls fawned over him; he was tall and handsome, had a rugged appeal to him thanks to his long hair and tattooed left arm. He drove a damn motorcycle that got him into trouble plenty of times.

You were Miss Goody Two Shoes who played it safe and Bucky was the Big Bad Wolf who liked taking risks.

It was a surprise when your relationship with him kept on progressing and the next thing you knew, the both of you have been together for a total of eight long years. It would’ve reached nine but shit happened and Bucky decided that those eight years didn’t matter to him anymore.

“Can we talk?”

If Bucky asked you that a couple of years ago, you would’ve probably punched him in the face and kneed him at the crotch before running away. Well, you still wanted to do so but a part of you wanted to talk things out. Get a proper closure maybe since Bucky failed to give you a detailed explanation that would help you understand why he chose to leave you.

Nat told you once that some things are better left unsaid. You spent years secretly pining for Bucky after the break up, spent nights questioning yourself where you lacked that made him leave you. You’d asked Steve about Bucky whether he met someone knew or how he was dealing with the break up; it did you more damage than good until you finally gave up and decided to actually move on.

But now that Bucky was here and there was no way to avoid him, maybe you deserved this confrontation after all.

“What do you want to talk about?” You asked, keeping your eyes on the pavement right in front of you.

You felt Bucky stand beside you, placing his hands inside the pockets of his jeans before turning to you, “About us.”

You snickered, “Us? What about us? What is there to talk about us?” You asked, turning your head to face him.

Bucky’s eyes have always been your favorite feature of his. They were very expressive and if Bucky could see through you every damn time, it was his eyes that you could always read. They were still blue but they held a certain emotion in them as he gazed at you.

Sadness and...regret?

Before your assumptions could get the best of you, you turned away and waited for Bucky to speak again.

“I can’t keep on avoiding you.” He said. “I’ve been doing so for the past few years and it kills me.” He admitted.

“And you think I want to keep doing this too? I’ve missed out on so many occasions because I just couldn’t be around you. You’re not the only one struggling.” You said.

Bucky shrugged, “Then let’s stop avoiding each other.”

The way he suggested it almost offended you; he was so nonchalant about it as if it was so easy to just let him waltz back into your life. Truth was, you dreamt of the day that he’d come crawling back to you. But you knew better than to let your walls down just because you miss him.

“When Steve told me that you seemed to be doing well, I really thought it meant that we can become friendly with each other, y’now. I mean, eight years. Those years meant so much to me, we’ve been through a lot and—“

“Are you fucking kidding me right now, Barnes?!” You bitterly chuckled.

“If those eight years together really meant a lot to you, you would’ve stayed. You would’ve allowed me to work it out with you! But what, you broke up with me because you thought I was too good for you? That you felt suffocated just because I was looking out for you?”

You didn’t mean to snap at Bucky like that, in your mind you thought you would be able to have a calm conversation with him. But with the alcohol running through your body, you couldn’t stop yourself from expressing yourself and and feeling the same way you did on that specific night.

“Too good? How am I too good for you, Buck?” You asked, immediately wiping off the tears that escaped your eyes.

“You have everything planned out! For yourself, for us. And it makes me feel fucking useless! I see you work your way up at your job and I’m still figuring out what the hell I want to do with my life!” He exclaimed.

You shook your head, “I didn’t know you felt that way.” You whispered. “If you told me this then I could’ve done something about it, Buck! Rather than let it get this far, I would’ve fixed it.” You told him and tried to reach out but Bucky took a step back.

“That too! You’re a fixer! You always end up fixing things. This relationship has become an endless cycle of me fucking up things and you picking up the pieces. And every single time you clean my mess, I feel like you’re hoping I’d be like the others. It’s like you’re trying to make me into a person I’m not just so I could fit this, this certain mold you had in mind!” He accused you.

You wiped again your tears and refused to believe him, “That’s not true, Bucky! I’ve always loved you for who you are, I never asked you to change for me!”

“Yes, you do! You never said it but I always felt it...when Steve got promoted and when Sam finally launched his business. You always wanted me to be like them, you never said it out loud but that’s what you made me feel whenever we talk about my job...or lack thereof.” He chuckled bitterly.

Bucky may not be traditional in the sense that he considered himself an artist. He never liked the idea of settling for a nine to five desk job so he took on a job as a tattoo artist. It wasn’t a permanent job and he didn’t have clients demanding for him all the time so it gave him time to work for a motorcycle shop too.

It was never a problem for you but practically speaking, your and Bucky’s joint savings wouldn’t be enough for the future that the both of you have planned out.

“I’ve been supportive of you! I never asked you to give up on those jobs, Bucky.” You defended yourself.

Bucky nodded his head, “You don’t know it but you do. That’s how I felt whenever you suggested that I try something else.”

“It’s because I know you can do so much more! Stay at the tattoo parlor and mechanic shop, then fine! But don’t settle because you have the potential to make it out there, that’s what I want you to know! I don’t understand why you’re limiting yourself, Buck. Why you’re suddenly so afraid.”

You carefully took a step closer to Bucky and thank god he let you this time. You swallowed the lump in your throat and reached out to cup his face in your hand. Bucky was livid, his chest rising heavily with every breath he took.

“You were the one who taught me to be brave, to take risks. I used to be so afraid, remember? Afraid to ride your motorcycle, to try out that job I thought I couldn’t handle. I was so scared to commit,” you chuckled, remembering how much you hesitated to give Bucky a chance when he asked you to be officially his girlfriend.

“...but you’ve always been there for me. And I want to do the same with you. I know that it seems scary to let go of what you believe is your calling. You don’t have to let go of it, Buck. But you gotta try something new too.” You said as you let your thumb caress the skin beneath his eyes.

There was silence between the two of you. Bucky had calmed down and you thought that it was over. Little did you know that it was simply the calm before the storm. Because the words that came out of Bucky’s mouth were the words you didn’t expect to hear.

“Well, this is me trying something new.”

Bucky refused to meet your gaze and simply let your hand move away from his face. You shook your head no as you turned around to compose yourself.

“We were fine this morning, Buck. What happened?” You asked and embraced yourself, seeking comfort you knew you’d only get if Bucky changed his mind.

“I thought we were fine too. But the tattoo parlor is closing in a month and we haven’t been getting plenty of clients at the motorcycle shop. And it just hit me y’now, I dread coming home to you because I know you’d be disappointed and that again, you’d offer to fix my shit and the thing is, I don’t want you to. I don’t want you to fix my shit or tell me how to deal with my problems! I woke up and realized that I just don’t...” Bucky paused when you swiftly turned around with a frown, eyes brimming with a fresh new wave of tears.

“Don’t say it, Bucky. I’ll be better, I promise! I won’t nag you or pressure you into anything. Just please, don’t say it. Please don’t. We can still work this out.” You begged Bucky.

You weren’t sure you could take it, what he wanted to say. You already knew what he was going to tell you, you didn’t want to hear it. Let other people say it but god, it’d break you if you heard it from him.

“I’m sorry but I don’t need you anymore.”

The stabbing pain in your heart felt so familiar, the kind that punched all the air out of your lungs. You thought you were done crying over Bucky, but you were so wrong.

“I fucked up.” Bucky huffed out, bowing his head as if ashamed.

“You realized that just now?” You snickered. “Do you know how long it took for me to get over you? To forget the pain from hearing you tell me that you don’t need me anymore? After eight years together, Buck. You were my first everything and you gave up on us. And you really expected us to be friends, just like that?!” You spat.

“I’m sorry!” Bucky exclaimed, lifting his head to look up at you and you were surprised that his eyes were glazed with tears.

“I was wrong, I was so fucking wrong. Because you were right, I shouldn’t have settled then. But god I was an idiot, an insecure idiot.” He admitted.

“I was so used to being the one who guided you that it fucking hurt my ego when I noticed that you were becoming your own person outside of our relationship. I was supposed to be the one supporting you, pushing you to be better. You ended being the one leading me. I let my ego get the best of me and thought I’d be better off without you. But it was the biggest mistake of my life because when I left, I felt even more lost.” Bucky explained.

You were left speechless, you weren’t sure why Bucky was telling you all this. Did he want you back or was he simply apologizing? You didn’t have words so you remained quiet and waited to see whether Bucky had more to say.

“I’m so sorry, I really am. I hurt you. I should’ve stayed, should’ve worked with you to fix our relationship. I hate what we’ve become, I sincerely wanted us to be civil with each other at least.” He said.

“Bucky, you’ve been saying the same thing over and over again. I’m not sure you understand the situation. I can’t be friends with you. Not after what happened. I thought I was fine but now I realized that I’ve never really moved on from the pain you caused me.” You told him and sniffed, looking back to check whether your friends could see you.

Thankfully, all the guests were still busy mingling with each other. It’s as if the universe meant for this confrontation to happen. But now you weren’t sure what to do after you finally got a clear explanation from Bucky.

“I wanted a fresh start with you.” Bucky said. “Thought that it would make it easier for me to win you over if we were friends again.”

You scoffed in disbelief, “It’s not that easy, Buck. I can’t just let you walk back into my life after your apology. It doesn’t work that way.”

You tried to move past him but he immediately blocked your way, “When I said I’ll always love you, I meant it. I still do. I want to make things right, please. Give me one last chance to fix this.”

Maybe it was the alcohol in your system, maybe it was Bucky’s words and how sincere he sounded that made your head spin. Your heart was racing and your palms turned cold. You wanted him back too, so bad but you weren’t sure if it was a good idea. He broke your heart and your trust, you weren’t sure if you’d survive if he left you again.

“I can’t continue this conversation, Bucky. I have to go.” You told him and made your way towards the door to the venue.

However, Bucky was quick to stand in front of the door. He had a determined look on his face, one that looked extremely familiar. You were still hurt but couldn’t deny the fact that you too, still love him.

Even after everything that had happened, Bucky still owned your heart.

“Bucky, can you please move? I want to go home.” You said and tried to reach for the door knob but Bucky moved and leaned against the door.

“You need a password to get through.”

You rolled your eyes, “We’re way too old for this, Bucky. I’m not playing with you.”

He shook his head, “I’m not playing either. Give me the password or else we’d be here the entire night.”

You huffed out, “This isn’t funny. Let me through.”

Bucky shrugged, “No can do. Like I said, I can do this all night.”

You deadpanned, “What’s the hint?” You asked with a defeated sigh, knowing well enough that there was no way you could walk past him without playing along with his stupid little game.

“Consists of three words.” Bucky said.

“Penis boobs vagina.”

Bucky cackled, “And I thought you said we’re too old for this.”

You groaned, “I’m serious, Bucky. Just let me go.”

“No. I made that mistake once and I’m not doing that again. I love you. And I promise that this time, it’ll be different. I know you still love me too, so again I am asking you to take a risk and say it.”

Bucky said it with conviction and you hated how it made your stomach flip. Up until this day, Bucky had a way to make you fold. And he could still read you.

“I’m not saying it, Bucky. How sure are you that I still feel the same anyway?” you asked.

Bucky tipped his head towards your neck, “Not sure if you just forgot but you’re wearing the promise ring as a necklace.”

Fuck. Of course, you’d forgotten about it. You may not have been wearing it on your finger, but you still continued to wear it. It meant a lot to you even after the break up, so much so that you couldn’t simply throw it away or remove it. You figured that it might be better to keep it around your neck. Out of sight, out of mind but still there. You wanted it to exist, it was a part of you.

“Say it and I promise that you won’t regret it.” Bucky insisted.

“Promises are meant to be broken. You proved that the night you broke up with me.” Your voice quivered when you said that.

“And I want to make it up for it for the rest of my life.” He reassured.

“History repeats itself. I don’t think I can deal with it again if you realized the second time around that you don’t need me. Buck, you really hurt me.” You said, voice cracking before you could even finish your sentence.

Bucky quickly took your face in between his hands and for some reason, it felt right. The warmth of his palm, the love in his eyes as he gazed at you, it felt like home.

“I know and I hate myself for it. So fucking much. But I promise you, it wouldn’t happen again. I fixed my life when you left, realized that you were right. I’m better now. So let me be the fixer this time, let me be the one to fix this mess, to pick up the pieces. Because I’m just as afraid to let you go again. I can’t do that again. I love you and I need you. I always did.”

The kiss he pressed on your forehead caused your walls to crumble down. All of a sudden you were sobbing into his arms and apologizing.

“I didn’t mean to pressure you then, Buck. I didn’t know, I’m sorry too.” You cried.

“Shh, no. Please don’t apologize.” Bucky coaxed as he pulled back to kiss your tears away. “None of this was your fault, baby. It’s all on me. Let me make it up to you, please?”

The term of endearment made your heart flutter and as much as you hated how Bucky easily won you over, again, the love you have for him was quick to outweigh it. You knew you shouldn’t have given in to him just like that, but this was Bucky. He was your greatest love, someone who owned your heart even after he left.

“I miss you, baby. Couldn’t fathom the thought of you being with someone else.” Bucky admitted as he hugged you tightly.

“I was so stupid, so fucking stupid. I hated myself for hurting you. I won’t do it again, I swear.”

His hand rubbed circles against your back, helping you calm down after your breakdown. He swayed you from side to side, pressed kisses on your crown and whispered promises that he was sure he was going to keep and you basked in it. When you finally calmed down, you pressed your face into Bucky’s neck and inhaled his scent.

He smelled the same, like comfort and love and trust. You hugged him tighter and smiled into his skin and mumbled, “I love you.”

Bucky chuckled, “You got the password right but I don’t think I’m letting you go just yet.”

“Nat and Sharon’s gonna kick our asses if they find out.” You chuckled.

He pulled back and stared at you lovingly, “I’ll take the hit for you.” he laughed.

“I’m sorry.” he mumbled again, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Forgiven.” You told him and stood on your tiptoes until Bucky bent down to meet your lips in a kiss.

You sighed into the kiss. Four and a half years of pain and anger all gone and replaced with the love you always had for Bucky. His lips against yours made you dizzy but in a good way.

It felt right, like this was how things were really supposed to be.

You pulled back and sighed, “As much as I want to stay like this, I’m really tired.”

Bucky let you go but took your hand in his, intertwining his fingers with yours. “I’m driving you home tonight.” He said.

You smiled.

“And the next night. And the next next night.”

Yet again, Bucky proved himself to be worthy of another chance. Because he drove you home the next night, and the next next night. It went on until he regained your trust back and all was well enough for him to finally reveal the black velvet box that he had been keeping in his pocket since the night of your eventful reunion.

“You need a password to see what’s inside.” Bucky grinned up at you as he bent down on one knee.

You chuckled through your years, “Any hint?”

“One word, three letters.”

You wiped away your tears with a smile followed by a subtle nod.

“Yes.”

Bucky kept his promise all along, he really did put a ring on your finger. Took quite a while with plenty of obstacles that caused its delay, but a promise fulfilled nonetheless.

Everything Bucky Tag List:

@ddowii @jessou893 @stealapizzamyheart @bagelofthelord @mxnt @dontputyourfckingdrinkonmytable @jeeperky @ohladymacbeth @wildflowergubler @supraveng @twinerd14 @buckysmar @bakugouswh0r3 @sweetcoldharmony @wintersfilm @charminivy @amelia-song-pond @iamvalentinaconstanza @mcubqrnes

#bbbwrites #oneshots: bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky fic #bucky angst #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes angst #sebastian stan

2K notes · View notes

feliix · 4 years ago

Text

like this ↠ han jisung (18+)

↠ Jisung x Reader ↠ genre: smut, fluff, established relationship!au ↠ rating: m ↠ word count: 2.6k ↠ summary: being stuck in quarrantine with your boyfriend seems all fun and games until you’re in need of an attitude adjustment, and Jisung is sure to it give you. ↠ warnings: explicit sexual content, dom!jisung, sub!reader, dirty talk, thigh riding, praise kink, nipple play (like a lot of it too idk?), teasing, overstimulation, aftercare ↠ a/n: I don’t even know how this happened it was supposed to be a drabble but I got carried away, enjoy!

After a long day of doing absolutely nothing, it's finally bedtime. Normally it would be nice to snuggle up next to your significant other before blissfully drifting off to sleep – but this time is different. Today was absolutely exhausting. Maybe exhausting is a bit too harsh to describe it – but Jisung was in one of those moods today that entailed him being excessively bothersome, and that’s enough to deal with on its own.

Being cooped up in your tiny shared apartment is nothing short of tiring. You love Jisung, yes, but spending every waking second with someone constantly for weeks on end is finally getting to you. This routine where you wake up together, go to virtual work next to each other, eat together, and then go to bed together is getting old real fast.

Today in particular drove you over the edge. The longer the day went on, the worse his antics became. His teasing ways only grew more and more irritating; it was to the point where Jisung kept doing things for the mere sake of pissing you off. It’s become his only source of entertainment in your tiny space. He kept saying or doing things that bothered you just enough to warrant a dirty look from you, but nothing was ever enough for you to stay angry over. But that only lasted so long. Jisung is nothing light of an instigator; being cooped up in your apartment together for days on end only makes it worse.

And once you crawled into bed tonight you were sure that these instigating antics of his would fade away, but there must’ve been something in the air tonight.

Now he’s cuddled up against your back, which would have been nice on any normal occasion. Except for this time his slender fingers are terrorizing your sides by jabbing you between the ribs every now and again.

“Knock it off,” you huff, swatting your hand back at him to stop. Yet, he remains pressed up against your back, squeezing you tighter his arms. Because of your positioning, you’re unable to see the amused look that's currently spreading across his face. Your annoyance only entices him to do it again, seeing how far he could get before you snap.

“Knock what off?”

You can practically hear the smile in his voice, which only annoyed you further that he’s finding amusement in your misery.

“Stop poking me,” you sigh as you do your best to wiggle out of his grip. Sleeping on the opposite side of the bed from Jisung is never as comfortable, but at this point you were desperate. Thank god you have a king-sized mattress.

“Y/N,” he whines as a pout forms on his face at the loss of contact, “I just wanna cuddle.”

But soon his arms are stretching back out and his top leg is wrapping over your body, pulling you back into him. An annoyed sigh leaves your lips as you surrender.

Trapped between all four of his limbs, you let out a forced sigh, biting your tongue to stop yourself from lashing out. You’d already gone through the entire day without an argument – there’s no use in starting one now. After living together this long he can tell the intentions behind the sounds of your breath, and now he was feeling kind of bad for bothering you. This sigh in particular was filled with annoyance, so much so that you weren’t able to respond to him with a coherent thought.

He does his best to make it up to you, kissing the nape of your neck sweetly before nuzzling into your back again. You notice the grip of his legs loosening around you, slowly allowing yourself to get comfortable again.

“I just miss you, Y/N.”

“We’re together all the time, Jisung.”

“That’s not what I mean,” he says matter-of-factly. Without a spare breath, his lips begin trailing up your neck, leading to your cheek and then landing on your ear before whispering, “I miss you.”

The low, gravelly tone in his voice makes a knot tighten in your stomach. Your mouth waters as your core begins to ache, understanding the intentions behind his words. “Y-you do?” You swallow thickly, eyes opening to stare at the wall in front of you as you wait for his next move.

“Mmhm,” He asks while his fingers begin to graze against the bottom of your shirt, tracing small circles on the material before pushing it aside and sliding his hand underneath. Goosebumps quickly cover your skin at the cold sensation of his fingertips meeting your stomach. His small ministrations against your smooth skin have you chasing after your own breath; more and more arousal begins to flood between your thighs by the second, “Do you miss me?”

“Y-yes,” you gulp back harshly, voice hanging on for dear life when his fingers make their way up to your torso, landing on one of your nipples. A satisfied hum leaves his lips as he squeezes the hardened bud between his fingers. You keen at his touch, your body quickly spasming as the pool of arousal between your thighs grows.

“I don’t like the attitude you’ve been giving me lately,” he whispers in your ear causing a shiver to travel your spine at the feeling of his hot breath fanning onto your cheek.

“I-I haven’t.”

You’re being honest, or so you believe in your own perspective. But Jisung has noticed how short your fuse has been ever since you’d started working from home. So, in Jisung nature, he retaliates in the only way he knows how; to be as big of an instigator as humanly possible. Anything he could do to push your buttons, he will do. That’s always been his way of getting back at you for your bad attitude. Unfortunately, you just kept on like normal, thinking it’s nothing but all the time you’ve spent together. Man, are you dead wrong.

“I don’t think so,” he pinches your nipple harder this time. Instinctively, your back arches in pleasure in reaction to his tough, flinching, and then relaxing as he soothes the area afterward.

“You don’t?”

“Nope,” he confirms, quickly grabbing you by the waist to flip you over. It catches you off guard, losing your breath in the heat of the moment as your back meets the mattress. Your eyes meet his as he hovers above you, and it doesn’t take very long for you to notice the dark and lustful look that’s taken over.

In an instant your lips chase after his, begging for more contact as desire fills your veins. His lips meet yours in a heated kiss; his tongue quickly darts out to tease the entrance of your mouth. But just this isn't enough for you, you want more – need more. It's hard to ignore the arousal soaking through your underwear, all you want is to satisfy your needs. No matter what you have to do to make things up to him.

Swiftly, his hands loop under the sides of your panties, ripping them off of your body by tearing them straight down the middle and tossing them across the bedroom. Your immediate reaction is to scold him for ruining a completely good pair of underwear – but once you see the dark look in his eyes you know that's no longer a good idea.

When his fingers reach for your cunt a smug smile spreads across his face. He’s pleased with how aroused you are already, just from him teasing your nipples for a few short minutes. “You wanna make it up to me?” His eyebrow quirks pompously following his question.

“H-how?”

Slowly, Jisung shifts up on the bed, propping himself up against the headboard to sit upright. You give him a confused look before he responds by patting his thigh, telling you to hop on.

Eyes widening in response to his action you instinctively shuffle towards him on the bed, bringing yourself up to your knees before staring directly at his hand over his thigh. You glace up at him once more, reassessing the situation to get another non-verbal confirmation of what exactly he wants.

With an encouraging nod of his head and lift to his brow, he’s motioning to his thigh again – except this time is different. His slender fingers grip around the fabric of his shorts, dragging them slowly upwards to expose the muscle underneath. Jisung’s hand remains on his leg, squeezing his muscular thigh to entice you as your mouth waters in amazement.

“I’m getting impatient,” his stern tone breaks you out of the trance you’re in. Shaking your head you return back to your current state, realizing how tight you’re squeezing your legs together right now.

Without making Jisung wait any longer, you scoot closer to him, slowly moving onto him by enclosing each of your legs on either side of his thigh. You sink down onto him gently, the feeling of his bare skin under you already sending another rush of arousal to your core.

Your eyes lock with his before you make any more movements, waiting for him to give you the cue to go, even though you have such a strong urge to start going. His pupils are blown out and dark, filled with desire as he admires your vulnerable state before him.

With one swift movement, his hands grip the sides of your waist, looking up into your eyes to watch your every reaction. You let him take control of you as he begins to guide your actions, shifting you forward ever so slightly on his muscular thigh. Instantly you shudder at the feeling; the sensation is foreign, unlike anything you’d done before. But you’re focused on obeying him – now that your head is buzzing with lust you’re too

“Like this,” he coaxes you as he sways your body back and forth a few times, hands still tight on your hips. The arousal pooling from your core makes it easy for you to glide back and forth on him. Your breath catches as your clit drifts over his muscular thigh, quickly stammering to hold yourself up by placing your hands on his shoulders.

“Feels good?”

An amused look is prevalent on Jisung’s face, eyes narrowed while a cocky grin lines his lips. You’re quick to respond with a nod, not trusting your voice as you’re still out of breath and shaky. Jisung takes this as an opportunity to ease up on the grip his hands have on you; he’s signaling for you to do it on your own now. For more support you move your hands to his chest, flattening your palms against him to give yourself an easier way to move.

Your legs buckle the second you begin grinding yourself on his thigh. A moan escapes your lips as your arousal coats his thigh, clenching tighter to get more friction to satisfy you. “Like this?” You’re able to choke out while your pace picks up. You’ve begun rocking forward slightly to give extra stimulation to your clit, pushing yourself closer to his chest each time. But with you shoving your chest so close to his face, he can’t help but reach out and knead them over your t-shirt.

Jisung’s hands quickly scramble to the bottom of the shirt, lifting it off your body in one swift motion. He’s careful not to disrupt you in the process. Once the garment is removed and flung somewhere to the side he reaches back out for you, his palms finding your bare breasts. He cups them gently, swirling his fingers so that his thumbs circles your nipples with every stroke.

Your head rolls back with the added pleasure, orgasm building faster with each rock of your hips. Goosebumps trail close behind as his hands travel down your body, finally settling on your hips. Your eyes screw shut in bliss as he flexes his thigh, the ridges formed by his muscles adding the needed friction under you.

The surface of his thigh becomes even more slippery as you continue to ride him – it’s your essence that's covering every inch. The slick surface makes it easier for you to move against him; pleasure overtaking your senses as you grind harder into his tensed muscles.

“Doing so well for me Angel,” his voice is raspy, yet comforting. His praise has you keening into him, only wanting to move faster to hear him compliment you more. As you open your mouth to speak a desperate whine escapes. It’s not what you intended to do but Jisung is still satisfied, smirking at your needy squeal as you get yourself off on his leg.

Your eyes slam shut as you try to focus on your movements. The growing ache in your knees is slowly beginning to tire you out, but you can’t stop now. You’re so close.

“I’m so tired,” you whine, frustration laced through each word you exhale deeply. Your movements begin to slow in fatigue; It feels like you’ve been at this forever. Whatever you’re doing just isn’t enough to reach your peak.

Hot tears prick in the corners of your eyes as you feel your high starting to slip away. You’ve already worked hard enough, building up a sweat and painful throb in your core begging for release. But Jisung can see the agony written all over your face, and he knows you well enough by now to leave you to suffer alone.

“Hey it’s okay, just a little longer baby,” he comforts you as grip on your waist tightens once again, “you’re doing so good.” Following his praise he begins to guide your movements once again, rocking you back and forth on his leg with the strength of his arms. Relief sets in as Jisung takes control, finally easing up your stress and allowing yourself to focus on your high.

He coerces your body over his toned muscles, your clit catching on every crease with each glide of your hips. And if his help wasn't enough, his body soon begins to lean forwards, pulling you towards him as his lips catch you in a heated kiss.

A steep groan leaves your lips as his teeth catch your bottom lip between them. Soon his lips are leaving yours, trailing kisses across your cheek and down your neck. You know where he’s heading – the extra sensitive spot just above your collarbone he knows all too well.

Jisung’s lips attach to your skin, sucking harshly on the area before stroking his tongue over the sensitive skin. The familiar band in your stomach is tightening once again, begging to snap with just a little more stimulation. It’s hard to catch your breath now; the overstimulation from the rock of your hips and his mouth sucking dark marks onto your neck is enough to send you over the edge.

Your body collapses as a sharp moan leaves your throat. Bliss overtakes you as your body falls into Jisung, his arms wrapping around you to hold you close. Your orgasm overtakes all of your senses as you impulsively shake with each spasm of your wall. Luckily Jisung is there to aid you through your high. His toned arms hold your tired body while you recover, peppering gentle kisses along your cheek while whispering praises in your ear.

As your shaking begins to subside Jisung helps you maneuver off of his leg. He’s gentle to lay you down beside him – moving the pillow so it supports your head just right. You’re in bliss as his arms cradle your exhausted body, feeling like you could fall asleep right here. The subtle sounds of his breath comfort you, closing your eyes as you relax back into his arms.

Maybe you’ll think twice before giving him an attitude again.

#han jisung smut #kdiner #kafenetwork #kpopuniversenet #starryktown #skz x reader #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids fanfic #stray kids smut #han jisung x reader #jisung smut #skz jisung #han jisung oneshot #jisung fanfic #han jisung fanfic #jisung x reader #skz smut

537 notes · View notes

folkreid · 3 years ago

Text

april fools

WORD COUNT: 1.06K

TYPE: fluff/angst ? idk lol

Today is April first we all know what that means. Pranks! I'm not sure how I should prank Spencer. I was thinking maybe a fake pregnancy? Should I? I think I should! It would be fun right, just to see his reaction. I hope he doesn't freak out or anything. We are kind of young. We are both 24 so obviously we aren't going to have a baby right now. Maybe in the future. We've been dating for two years. I've known him since we were about 18 I believe. I took a class at his college as a senior in high school.

I walk into the dollar store looking around. What do I need? The pregnancy test obviously. Oh and a pink marker so I can fake it. Maybe some chips i'm kind of hungry. Oh and a water because i'm thirsty.

Okay that's it. I pay for my things and head home.

I walk into our apartment and run to the restroom. I get the marker and draw two lines on it. Okay I think it looks good. Now I should just wait for Spencer to come back home.

I hear the door open! Hes here. I jump off my bed and grab the test putting it in my pocket.

I run to the door and hug my boyfriend. "Hey babe" he kissed my head hugging me. I start rocking us side to side. "I missed you" I say, my words muffled into his shirt. I take in the scent of his cologne. He smells so good. Like vanilla and lavender.

"I missed you more" he hugs me tighter. I pull away and distance myself from him. I bite my lip nervously. Well it's fake but he has to believe it.

I avoid eye contact with him and fiddle with my fingers. I wait for him to notice. He puts down his coat and looks over to me. "What's wrong?" he asked concerned. Good. He thinks i'm being for real.

"Theres something I need to talk to you about Spence" I look up at him. "What is it?" he grabs one of my hands playing with it.

"Don't get mad okay?" I say sounding guilty of something horrible. I want him to think it's something bad. "Why would I get mad?" he scrunches up his eyebrows. "Because" I lick my lips looking down. "D-Did you cheat on me?" he stutters. I stay looking down. I hear him sigh. I look down to his fist, it's clenched. "Did you cheat on me?" he asks again, this time sternly.

"No Spencer. It's something else" I look up to him. His face softens. "What is it then" he says walking to the couch and sitting down. I walk over to him and curl up with him. "I-I'm pregnant" I look up to him. He rolls his eyes. "Ha Ha very fun Y/n did you not think I would remember April fools" he says sarcastically.

"I'm being for real Spencer" I back up off of him. He looks at me and tilts his head giving me the "really are you sure about that" look. I take the test out of my pocket and hand it to him.

His eyebrows raise and his mouth opens. "Oh my god" he mummers. "W-Wow" he takes a deep breath. He gets up and hugs me. "We're having a baby. We're having a baby!" he excitedly shouts. "Oh I love you and our baby. Can we go baby shopping? Oh and I know how you don't like gender constructs so maybe we can do purple. I really like purple." he talks really fast.

"Woah woah babe calm down" I laugh.

He's so excited. How am I supposed to tell him it was a prank.

"Im sorry i'm just really excited for our baby" he gets on his knees and hugs my stomach. He kisses my stomach. "Hi baby, i'm your dad. I cant wait to spoil you" he laughs through tears.

No why! How am I going to break it to him. I thought he would be only sort of excited.

"You don't think we're too young?" I ask him. He gets up off his knees. "No of course not, 24 isn't that young" he shakes his head. "Yeah but it'll be hard to raise a baby with your job Spence" I tell him. "I'll ask Hotch for time off i'm sure he'll understand" he smiles.

"But what if" I start. "Why all of these 'buts' and 'what if's' Y/n? Do you not want to have a baby?" he asks me.

This is going to be so hard. "Spencer, I need to tell you this. The pregnancy test was fake, it was a prank"

"Oh" was all he said.

"Spence"

"Please just give me some space" he cuts me off before going to our room.

I didn't mean to hurt him. It was a stupid prank.

I give him some time. It's been five hours I wasn't sure how much time he needed.

I walk into our room. He was sitting down watching tv. I could hear his sniffles he was still crying. I sit on the edge on the bed he doesn't look over to me he just ignores it. I get up and lie next to him. "Baby" I start. "Hm" he hums. "Are you mad at me?" I ask.

He licks his lips and continues to watch tv. "Babe stop ignoring me. I'm sorry" I scoot closer to him. "Okay"

"Do you forgive me?" I hold his arm. "Nope" he pops the p. This whole time he hasn't even look at me. I start shaking him. "Spencer Walter Reid talk to me"

Hes committed.

"Y/n stop!" he yelled which startled me a little bit. I flinched a tiny bit. "I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to yell at you i'm just mad" he sighed.

I frown. He's mad at me. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad love" I give him a sympathetic look.

"I know you didn't. I was just really excited. I want us to have a baby, I want us to have a family." he says grabbing my hand. "I know love i'm sorry" I hug him. He strokes my back.

"So you really want a baby?" I ask Spencer.

He nods.

"Okay then let's make one" I smirk.

#spencer reid fan fiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fluff #spencer x reader #spencer reid #pregnancy #criminal minds

90 notes · View notes

beskarberry · 4 years ago

Text

Krayt’s Teeth

Bargaining with Beskar, Chapter 3 (The Mandalorian x f!reader)

The sound of crashing and shouting was hot on your tail, the other hunters had followed you and were gaining fast. You saw a light rapidly approaching ahead of you, and the two of you burst out into the brilliant daylight to the worst possible place: a dead fucking end.

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 6.7k

Content warnings: Canon typical violence, killing in self defense, headcanon angst, FLUFF, sensory deprivation, body worship, oral sex (f receiving).

A/N: These are my headcanons regarding Mandalorian culture in terms of sex, I didn’t find much lore on it so whether it’s accurate or not idk but I like them and that’s all that matters! Enjoy~

<-Previous Next->

You could have slept forever, even on that horrible little cot you were so comfortable that you could have been out for days, but the only one on it was you. You did’t know when Mando got up from the tiny space you both shared through the night, or how he managed to get out from your tangled bodies without waking you up. You opened your eyes to tiny green baby hands tugging at your fingers.

“Hey booger, is it time for breakfast? Where’s your papa?” You started to sit up, but the horrible sticky mess underneath you made you reluctant to move, a mix of passion and pain from the day before. “Yikes. I’m gonna run all his water out if I have to keep using the fresher. Come on, let’s get scrubbed up.” The baby gibbered excitedly at you, though you weren’t sure how much of what you said he actually understood. You scooped him into your arms without looking back at the sad little cot and all its stains. “You’re water proof, right?”

The ship’s engines were rumbling away, so you guessed tin man was up in the cockpit flying you towards your next bounty. Or Nevarro. You would have to find Mr. Mystery later, the grossness that was you had to be dealt with. Between you and the child your shower took forever, the two of you getting water and soap bubbles from top to bottom. You didn’t care. You had been on Tatooine for months without having a real shower, being consigned to the sonic freshers that vibrated the sand off of the moisture farmer’s bodies; and this was the second real shower you’d gotten to have in twice as many days. You spent a good deal of time trying to get your chatty friend to hold still long enough to be dried off, the little fart squealing with joy every time you went for him with the towel.

An ordeal later you were both fresh and presentable, but your host was still nowhere to be seen, though the ugly sheets had thankfully disappeared from view. The ship was quiet now, without the engine running you knew you had to be back on the ground, and you could hear a distinct hum of activity coming through the walls. Space port? He flew us into town? The thought was replaced immediately with a rich, savory smell coming through the air vents: FOOD! Your gut grumbled loud enough to resonate through the cabin and earn you a confused look from the baby. When was the last time you really ate? You’d been living on ration packs for the last couple of days. That was going to change right now.

“Ya hungry buddy? Me too! Maybe that’s where your dad is, hmm?” Grabbing your old backpack and hooking the baby under your arm you started punching buttons on the wall to get the door open, sending walls sliding and cabinets opening before you got one of the access ramps open. Bright double sunlight nearly blinded you, and on reflex you covered the baby’s giant googly eyes. It took a moment for your own to adjust to the radiant light of the Tatooine morning, and the smell of cooking food hit you like a ton of bricks, making your mouth water. As your eyes adjusted you were able to take in your surroundings: though it was bright outside you were parked low inside a maintenance bay, the walls of which soared high above you; littered with engine parts and humming with droid activity. Sound was the last input your hungry brain could process, but when it did you didn’t like what you heard. The sounds of an argument echoed around the hangar, high and shrill.

“I already told you, you can’t park here! You’re bad for business!”

“I just need to park here long enough to get supplies.”

“Well you’re gonna have to pay up, Mando! I’m not running a charity here! You got credits for supplies you got credits for parking! Up front this time!”

Oh no.

Of all the mechanics and docking hangars in Mos Eisley he had to pick this one. The fireball of a woman barely came up to your partner’s chest, but she made up for it with unbridled fury; and the giant cooked animal leg she was swinging around like a club between bites made her look even more formidable. She noticed you coming down the ramp and stopped grilling your comrade long enough to glare daggers through your skull.

“Oh NO! No nope nuh uh! You can turn right back around and get back on that ship, missy! I knew it! I knew you were bad for business, Mando! What’re you doing running around with her? I hope she’s your bounty because she’s your problem!”

“Peli.” Your words were cold as ice, but the squirming baby in your arms took all the malice out of your stance. He wiggled until you set him down, and he ran towards the mechanic with open arms.

“Baby! You can stay but your dad’s gotta take the mean lady somewhere else! She cheats at sabacc!”

“You lost fair and square, Peli! Try playing a better hand next time!”

“Ladies please!” Mando cut through your bickering, holding his arms up between the two of you like he was trying to corner a pair of wild blurgs. “If I let the child stay with you for the day, will you let me park the Razor Crest here? Just for a couple hours?”

Peli bounced the child on her hip, offering him a bite of her breakfast. The baby squealed happily while he sank his little teeth into the mighty snack, though the size of it comically dwarfed his itty bitty hands. “I’ll tell you what, you let me keep him and then maybe I’ll let you park here in a week.” Mando cocked his helmet at her with disdain and she huffed loudly, “Well if you put it that way, I guess you can park here, but you gotta put five hundred credits down, and not a cent less!”

Mando reeled, stabbing his hands to his hips with indignation. “Five hund- absolutely not! What am I going to buy our-” You interrupted his tirade with a hand on his shoulder, waving a slew of credits in front of his eyes. Peli snatched them out of your hand, fanning them out like cards to count them.

“Who’d you cheat these outta?”

“Don’t worry about it.” You leaned casually against your metal man, eyeing Peli with a smug look on your face. “Let’s go, Mando. Bye baby green bean, have fun with Auntie Cheats-at-Sabacc!” You spun him around by the hand and dragged him towards the exit, ignoring the insults being slung at your back. “We are getting breakfast and that’s final!”

The Mandalorian allowed you to pull him along a few feet before grinding his heels into the sand, shaking his head. “You have to stay here.”

Now it was your turn for sassy head tilts. “I just paid for your parking, buckethead, that makes me in charge and I’m hungry! I’ll buy you breakfast too if you want.” He didn’t budge, fixing you with that intense stare of his and grabbing you by the shoulders.

“You are still being hunted. Mos Eisley isn’t safe for you.”

Ah.

You knew you could look after yourself, and he himself had compared you to a ferocious rancor just yesterday. You groaned loudly, “Shit balls of hell. But dad, I’m huuunngry!” The man bristled at your paternal harassment, sighing heavily and letting his helmeted head fall to the side like the world was ending. He glanced around the hangar exit, his shiny beskar snapping to each object of interest until he located a protocol droid corpse that was missing everything from the waist down. He strode over to it and held it down with one boot, yanking it by the head until it popped off. He began prying the droid’s vocorder apart at the mouth, pulling it wide until the droids face plate broke off with a snap! Tossing the rest of the logic processing unit to the ground, he held the face plate up to the light, inspecting the clarity of its photo receptor casings. He bent back down to the junk pile and fished out a stray wire to thread through the ruined audio processors, then tossed the finished creation to you.

“Put that on.”

You turned the makeshift mask over in your hands to check for sharp edges before you pressed it to your face. The bug eyes on the front were dirty, but you could see well enough. Before you could clean them more thoroughly you felt the weight of fabric on your head, his cloak now worn as your own. The thought of how you must look made you giggle. “You make me take my clothes off, now you want me to put clothes on. It never ends with you, Mando. Next you’ll be forging me beskar. Now can we eat something, please?” Without a word the armored man turned on his heel and walked out the hangar exit. I’ll take that as a yes.

Mos Eisley buzzed with life, people and animals and things you couldn’t explain made their way up and down the bustling streets. The smell of food led you to a vendor selling something that could have been a root vegetable, covered in herbs and spices and grilled to perfection. You couldn't wait, all thoughts of self-preservation went out the window as you hauled ass to the stand, waving two fingers in the air. When you had both of your prizes in hand you stuffed the savory veggie under your mask, sighing contentedly at the taste of real honest-to-Maker food. “Hey tin man, I hope you like... whatever this-” You turned to offer your partner something to eat, but he had disappeared from the crowd. “Alright... more for me.”

Taking a newspaper from the vendor you wrapped the extra snack up tight and threw it in your pack for later, continuing to chow down on your own. You would find Mando eventually, and you had credits to spend. You had held onto your hush-money for months to avoid suspicion, but now it was burning a hole in your pocket. Wandering the streets of Mos Eisley from merchant to merchant you began accumulating a small hoard of supplies, ranging from bacta to hand tools, and food. Whatever you could get your hands on that would survive hyperspace when you inevitably left this fucking dirtball for good; though you still weren’t convinced that you wouldn’t be making that flight in carbonite. You picked out new clothes and underwear, a much-needed bedroll, and some soft bantha-wool blankets. Something further down the marketplace caught your eye, and you made your way to the fancier items that glittered in the double daylight. You didn’t wear jewelry yourself, a poor choice of attire for a hunter, but the way the trinkets caught the light still made you wistful. Your hidden eyes danced over the glittering treasures; jewels and geodes that had been found deep in the sands and polished to a radiant shine.

You spotted something opalescent at the end of one table and found a pair of krayt teeth, each about the size of your palm. They had been sanded to a smooth, flat finish and carved with intricate desert patterns. The backs of them had tiny fittings that could be sewn on as buttons, or pulled off to reveal magnets. Something about their shape seemed familiar, though you couldn’t imagine why in that moment. You purchased the unique pieces anyway, something to remind you that even the harshest of places could hold hidden beauty. After a while you had so much junk piled in your arms that you could barely see over it, and tin man was nowhere to be found. You spotted a courier droid and paid for it to deliver your treasures back to Hanger 3-5, though you kept the pricey teeth in your pockets. With your arms free you started looking for your missing comrade.

The streets were busy with people, you would have to get somewhere out of the way in order to scan the crowds. Your eyes went from shimmer to shimmer, looking for his reflective chrome dome. “Big jerk,” you mused to yourself “‘Mos Eisley’s not saaafe...’ If he’s so worried then where the hell is he? Bah!” The scratched-up photoreceptor casings of your mask made it a challenge to see through the crowd, and you took a moment to adjust the iris apertures so you wouldn’t have to keep squinting into the double sunshine when you felt a hand on your back. Finally. “Mando, where have you-”

“Mando? Whos’sis man-do? Nah sssweetheart, I think you got me confused wi’ sssomeone elssse.” The slithering voice in your ear made your blood run cold. Not Mando! You rocketed your elbow backwards, connecting with the gut of the stranger on your back with an -oof! The hand let go long enough for you to make a run for it, and you tore off down the streets of the busy spaceport, smashing into bystanders in your wake. You cast a quick look behind you to see a large reptilian body flying after you, brownish scales catching the reflection of the noonday suns. Though you had your blaster, the risk of hitting a civilian was too great, so running would have to do. You were thankful for the courier droid that had freed your hands just minutes before as you barreled down the busy streets.

Market stalls flew past you, your boots kicking up sand and dust. The mask on your face, as dirty as it was, kept the debris from your eyes as you raced through the sunburnt city. You had to lose this fucker and fast. You turned down an alley, left, right, another right, leaping over supply crates and low fences like a lothcat. You turned to see if you had lost your chaser, breath heaving and heart pounding. Behind you was clear, but you took your eyes off your path for just a second too long, and were taken by surprise when a heavy weight fell on you from above.

The Trandoshan had gone over the low sandstone roofs, chasing you easily through the alleyways of Mos Eisley while you were none the wiser. He pinned you under him quickly, ripping your blaster off your hip and pointing your own barrel in your face. “Tha’ss enough, princesss! Nice n’ quietlike now. You gonna make me a pretty penny you are.” The lizard’s words dripped with metaphorical venom, though you were sure by the look of those fangs that real venom was probably right behind. “Ahm gonna cart yer arse right back to th’ Guild’n I’ll become th’ most famous hunter in th’ galax -urk!” With a sickening gag the hunter above you grew a shiny new fang in the back of his throat before falling down dead on top of you, a vibroblade protruding from back of his skull.

“Took you long enough!” You hollered at your chrome companion, who was stepping forward to kick the carcass off of you. “Where the fuck have you been? Getting your rifle polished?” He pulled you to your feet, handing you your blaster while readjusting the mask on your face. You swatted at his fussing hands, but when you looked at him you were shocked to see not one but three blinking bounty fobs dangling from his belt. On the ground by the dead lizard was a fourth, flashing rapidly in the sand.

“I told you you weren’t safe! We need to leave right now.” You were barely able to grab the remaining bounty fob while you were being tugged away by your allied hunter. He had a death grip on your hand, pulling you along behind him towards what you hoped was the docking hangar. You would have to cross the main street to get there, and as the pair of you plowed across the dusty, busy road there came shouts from either side. More hunters, fucking Guild! You didn’t have a single second to assess them before you were lead through an alley on the other side of the street. These were darker than the ones you had run through on the west side of town, and shady bodies moved quickly out of the way of your living locomotive.

At the end of a narrow alley you both burst through a door leading into an abandoned building. The darkness was almost worse than the blinding sunlight, you would need time for your eyes to adjust but the Mandalorian had enough sensory detection equipment that he ghosted through the ruinous building with ease; never once letting go of your hand as you tripped and stumbled through the dark. The sound of crashing and shouting was hot on your tail, the other hunters had followed you and were gaining fast. You saw a light rapidly approaching ahead, and the two of you burst out into the brilliant daylight to the worst possible place: a dead fucking end.

“There! Get down!” Mando pointed at a pile of rubble, probably big enough to hide behind, but that’s not how you handled business.

“Fuck you! I’m not going down without a fight!” You pulled your blaster out and aimed at the incoming assailants. He growled at you and stepped closer, putting his body in between you and the door. The reptilian hunters burst from the darkness of the warehouse, firing rapid shots of blaster charges that bounced off of Mando’s beskar. You fired over his protective arm, taking out the first one and tripping up the second, who fell over his cohorts limp body. Mando took shot after shot to the chest, reeling with each impact. His other arm cocked back and shot out, sending a wall of fire into the last of the Guild’s hired guns.

Both of you were panting, shaking and sweating from flying through Mos Eisley, but the sound of blaster fire would draw attention and you knew there was no time to waste. You stepped over the incinerated corpse, making sure the fob it carried was melted, the second body still squirmed in the dirt, and you weren’t going to let it get a second chance, firing your blaster through it’s scaly skull. You picked the remaining two fobs and stuffed them in your pockets, making a run for it back through the building with Mando right behind, the blaze of his flamethrower lighting your way.

You took a different door out of the building and were relieved to see the words ‘HANGAR 3-5′ painted in bright blue Basic straight ahead. You skittered through the entrance, rounding the corner and dropping down behind the edges of the hangar doorway. Mando did the same on the other side, both of you pointing your blasters back towards Mos Eisley’s dark heart. Bootsteps behind you made you snap around, and you nearly shot your mechanically inclined host.

“You kids have fun out there?” Peli stood over where you were hunched, and you lowered your blaster to the ground. At her feet your little buddy was holding onto her pant leg, making big puppy dog eyes at you. You looked over to Mando to make sure there weren’t any more coming, but he still held his blaster out ahead. After a few tense seconds he lowered it down until it was back in its’ holster, then pulled himself to his feet.

“We can’t stay any longer, we’re putting you in danger. Time to go, kiddo.” His charred beskar still shimmered when he bent down to pick up his adopted son, who chirped with delight. “Thank you for watching him.”

“He can stay any time! Oh and thanks for all the snacks you made that droid bring me!” Peli called after the three of you as your party quickly boarded the Razor, making you turn around and stick your tongue out at her. She happily flipped you off and started closing the ground entrance to the bay, letting you board the ship uninterrupted. Fortunately, the courier droid’s delivery had made it to the ship, though you couldn't help but notice a few of your most carefully picked snacks had been taken as collateral. Fucking Peli. As much as she infuriated you, there wasn’t another person on all of Tatooine that you would rather play sabacc with.

The old rust bucket rumbled to life, taking off into the midafternoon sky and pointed towards the stars. Finally! Bye motherfucker. The hazy atmosphere of the outer rim planet fell away below you until the light of the bright yellow world illuminated the Crest’s stern. The pre-Imperial scrapheap started howling with noise, and you were almost thrown to the deck when it blasted into the safety of hyper space.

Your heart was still racing and you struggled to catch your breath. Once you had yourself in order you started busying yourself with putting the supplies away, filling the food larder to capacity. The child was contentedly telling you about his day with his auntie in his cute baby gibberish, and you picked him up off the ground to give him a much needed hug, pushing your stolen identity onto the top of your head to give him kisses. You almost wanted to ignore the sound of heavy armored boots hitting the floor panel under the ladder, their wearer opting to jump down from the cockpit rather than climb. You could feel the fury coming off of him as he stalked over to where you were sorting your treasures.

“You could have been hurt! I knew it was a bad idea to let you go wandering around, even with your face covered. What if they’d caught you? I picked three of them off before you even saw one!”

“I had it under control, Mando! I’m not some princess that needs you coming to her rescue at every sign of a struggle. And you don’t get to let me do anything, you don’t own me!” The man under your scrutiny paced the cabin on stiff legs with his hands on his hips, helmet snapping with rage.

“I know you can handle yourself, but I need to protect you.” He said with a huff, “And that lizard was... he had you pinned down, had his filthy, scaly claws on you... Nobody should touch you like that! What if.. what if he... I- I- didn’t like that he was...” Listening to the sound of the gears jamming in his head made you realize the ridiculous thing he was trying to say.

“Are you.. Mando are you jealous?”

“No! I- I’m.. Cyar’ika I... ”

Oh no, you don’t get to be cute right now. “I don’t know what that means, Mando! What is that, some kind of sexy little pet name you use on all the girls you take underneath of you?”

“NO! I didn’t- I would nev- I’ve never had... There’s never been- no!” Oh how you wished you could see his face, watching him flail trying to defend himself from your accusation, he was probably white as a sheet under all that armor.

“Never what, Mandalorian?”

“I’ve never had anyone in this ship before!” The Mandalorian’s confession lost steam halfway through as embarrassment and fear crept into his throat, threatening to choke him with his own secrets.

“Wait.. wait wait. Never? You’ve never had anyone in this ship or...” You started approaching him, analyzing his visor for hints of meaning. “Or you’ve never had anyone at all?” The Mandalorian stopped his pacing, but his shoulders looked like they were carrying the weight of the galaxy. His silence told you everything, and the last piece of his puzzle fell into place. “Mando...was I your first?”

“Y-yes.” His visor tilted up to you, hands fidgeting at his sides. His voice was faint and sheepish, a stark contrast to the thunderstorm you were arguing with a moment ago. Your eyes were full of questions, all racing through your mind so quickly none of them made it to your mouth. The metal man answered them all for you in one singular motion, raising his fist to knock a couple times against his beskar helmet. His creed.

“So, what, you guys aren’t allowed to have sex?”

He sighed his heavy, trademarked sigh and plopped down on the nearest supply crate with a defeated thud, cradling his head in his hands. “No it’s not that. Not... not exactly. In Mando’a the word we use is me'dinuir. It means ‘to give’, specifically to give yourself to another. And... when you give yourself away to someone-“ He turned the black gloss of his single eye up to you, “-you belong to them. That is The Way.”

The weight of his words made your blood cold. He was jealous, but not just because that other hunter had put his scaly hands on you. Everything about his attitude around you suddenly made sense, the way he had looked at you when you were presenting yourself to him that first day, why he never threw you in carbonite when he probably should have, and how he had stayed with you through the night after you nearly died hunting his bounty. His mysterious way of life decreed that giving his body to you meant that he had also given you his soul, and that made you just as important to protect as his foundling.

Mando reached out to pat the fuzzy green head of the baby you were still holding, who gibbered sleepily up at his armor plated papa. “I’m sorry to put that on you, and I’m sorry for how I acted. You’re not my bounty anymore, and I shouldn’t try to control you. I understand if you don’t want to continue with me to the next bounty. You can take whatever you want from the armory when we land next. I’m.. I’m so sorry.” The monolithic man looked so tiny now, sitting on the edge of the crate with his shoulders hunched. He reached his arms out to take his infant son from you, hugging him to his blast-burnt chest and smoothing his massive ears. "I didn’t get to thank you for washing him earlier, he smells really good.”

You desperately needed to know more, though the sight of him fawning over his sleepy son made your heart swell. “I kinda got the feeling that you were rusty when we met, but that was actually your first time? And what does that mean ‘you belong to them’? How can you belong to me? I don’t even know your name.”

"It means that I’m now sworn to protect the one that carries my soul. I’m not asking you to do the same, you’re not Mandalorian.”

His words made you feel sick, ashamed that you had taken something so sacred from him without a second thought, but how could you have known? He could have stopped at any time, you were the one in cuffs that day, not him. No, out of trillions and trillions of sentient beings in the galaxy he chose to give himself to you, knowing full well what his heritage decreed. Why you? Arms crossed, you dug deeper. “You’ve never seen another naked body than your own?”

He shook his head. “Just... holo-vids...”

You were going to have to ask him about those later. “Nothing? You’ve at least kissed someone before though, right?”

“Kissed?”

Maker fucking help you. “Yeah you know, kissing? The thing you do with your... oh, right." You reached up and tapped him twice on the beskar. “You need your face to do it.”

He cocked his helmet at you. “Can you show me?”

The innocence of his question made you melt. Fuck you, tin can, you’re not supposed to be cute when you’re in trouble. You reached your hand out, demanding he give you his, and shyly he obeyed. You pulled his hand to your lips, unsure of how much he could actually feel through his thick leather gloves. You pressed his hand to your lips and watched his whole body snap straight. “Kiss, like that.”

He was staring at his hand like he’d never seen it before, and after a moment he pulled your locked fingers to his head, tapping his forehead with the back of your hand. “Kov’nynir, But we do it with our helmets.” At this rate you’ll be speaking Mando’a in no time. He still held your hand gently, running his thumb over your fingers. “I think I like your way better. Could... Could you do that again?”

So polite, maybe having him stuck with you wouldn’t be so bad. You pulled his hand back to you, giving him another soft kiss on the side of his thumb, and you heard the sound of his breath catching in his modulator. Your lips pressed to each of his knuckles, and then you turned his wrist to kiss his palm. “How’s that?”

“That’s amazing.”

“You like that? Watch this.” Addressing the bantha in the room would have to wait. You tugged his glove off, revealing the warm bronze skin underneath and kissed him again. The hitched breaths coming out of his modulator were honey to your ears, and you turned his wrist over to kiss his bare palm again, hunting for more sweet sounds. His body was so stiff, so tightly wound you thought he might snap. “Are you ok? Do I need to stop?”

“I- I- want to... Can... Can I try?” You nodded, your heart jumping to your throat at the thought of him removing his helmet in front of you, but instead he gently reached up to the busted droid face you still wore on your head. With a twist of a knob the armatures inside of the eye casings coiled shut, and when he slid the mask down into place you were thrown into total darkness. “Can you see?” You shook your head. “Promise?”

You sighed, long and frustrated. “I promise, dark as a sarlacc’s backside.” You were met with only silence. Then, after what felt like an eternity you heard the sliding sound of metal as the child’s pram shield slid closed, then the shuffle of armor being removed, and lastly the dull thunk of something heavy being set down on the crates. His hand found yours again, and he pressed his lips against your skin. They were hotter than you were expecting, and soft, almost plush. You understood right away why he was so rigid when you were doing the same, it was amazing. Gentle kisses made their way over the back of your hand and made heat flood through your veins. He moved slowly over each joint, following the same pattern you had shown him, then turned your hand over and kissed at your fingertips. Something fuzzy brushed along with his lips, and you imagined that he might have a mustache. The shivers that crept their way up from your captured hand knocked all the strangeness of your conversation out of your mind, but when he reached your wrist he stopped.

“Where else do you kiss at?” You nearly fainted at the sound of his unfiltered voice, a rich baritone that dripped with dark intentions and stole all the words from your mouth. You could only point with your other hand at the forearm attached to the hand he held. Again you felt his lips on your wrist, then slowly, inch by agonizing inch he made his way up your arm, each kiss slower than the last until your toes were curling in their boots. When he reached the edge of the tunic’s sleeve that hung at your elbow he paused again. “Where else?”

“Everywhere.” Your tormentor hummed at your consenting words and let go of your hand to run his palms down your clothed thighs. When he reached your knees he pulled on their joints, bidding you to bring your legs up over his lap. When you were seated on him he resumed his trek up your arm, kissing at the crease of your elbow and then upwards over your tunic until he reached your shoulder. When he got to your neck you almost buckled over, but his hands were at your back in an instant, wrapping heavily around your waist. Your own hands made their way to the nape of his neck, and your fingers found the edge of his hairline that you had felt before. To your delight you felt that the tousled curls went all the way up, and you tangled your fingers in them, exploring their softness while he explored you.

His journey led him up your neck to the base of your jaw where he nipped gently at the sensitive skin like you had done to him last night, sending a fresh wave of goosebumps from your head to your toes. When his nose bumped the edge of your mask you were suddenly aware of how silly you might look with your big bug eyes. “Can I take this thing off?” you asked in a whisper. “I won’t look.”

“I have a better Idea. Hold on tight.” You dug your hands into his shoulders and felt his arms wrap under your legs as he stood up, lifting you with such ease that you wondered if he felt your weight at all. His boots echoed through the cabin until he stopped at the other end. You hung on for dear life while he climbed the ladder with you still wrapped around his front. When you both reached the top you let yourself unwind from him and scooted on your butt over the floor, listening to the sound of him pulling himself all the way up. You remained seated as your host fussed around the flight deck, the noise of buttons pressing and switches being thrown the only input to your deprived senses.

You were only unattended for a moment, then his hands found your waist, fishing for the edge of your shirt. The tunic was pulled up and over your head, taking your mask with it, and you squeezed your eyes shut to protect his modesty; unsure of what his unconventional oath to you included in the fine print. Your diligence was rewarded with a kiss on your forehead, then down to kiss both of your closed eyes, and then lastly to your lips. The searing heat of his mouth on yours threatened to throw your eyes open, but when they fluttered all you saw was darkness. The transperisteel’s blast shielding had been closed, and the only light in the cockpit came from a handful of illuminated buttons on the dash.

He was lying over top of you on the metal floor, one arm wrapped under your neck for support. The cold decking under you was uncomfortable, but you couldn’t be bothered to care, letting yourself be consumed by his kisses and becoming drunk on the scent of leather and adrenaline. The soft fuzz of his facial hair tickled slightly as he pressed into your lips, and you couldn’t help but smile. Your hands went to his face, running your thumbs over his cheeks and feeling what you weren’t allowed to see. His face was scruffy but not unkempt, and the bristles went all the way from his jaw up to the bottom of the defined nose that bumped against your own. You felt the creases on the corners of his eyes, wishing you could see his smile lines and all the stories they would tell.

You kissed him back, letting your tongue glide over his plush lips and making him inhale sharply. You licked into him again, and this time you were met with his tongue as well, just the faintest touch of its tip. He hummed in your mouth, and the sound of him so close made your belly pool with heat and your kisses bolder, sending your tongue deeper into his mouth until he was almost vibrating with the sensation of you exploring something as forbidden as his human body. He mirrored you as best he could, rolling the smooth muscle over your lips and the edges of your teeth until you were both lost in each other’s taste. He pushed his forehead against yours, pulling his mouth away with frantic breaths that spread fire over your skin. “Everywhere?”

You pushed your lips against his again, giving him an ambitions ‘Mmhmm’ as an answer. His growl made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end, and you realized where his goal was. He kissed and nipped his way down your throat, letting his tongue glide over your skin. He made his way to your breast, taking its’ tender tip between his teeth and making you gasp. He sucked at it gently, rolling his tongue around it while it grew harder for his efforts. The hand not under you groped at your free breast so it wouldn’t be ignored.

"Beep!”

An urgent chime echoed in the tiny space, the hyperdrive indicator was flashing its countdown warning: 10 minutes remain.

The Mandalorian’s growl on your breast made your blood turn to ice and your core flush with heat at the same time. He wanted to devour you, taste every single inch of your exposed skin, but time was not on your side; and he became a man on a mission to prove himself worthy of you. Bristles dragged over your skin as he slid down your belly until he hit the edge of your pants. They were yanked off so fast you briefly worried about the krayt teeth that were still in their pockets, but you didn’t have long to think before Mando was poised over the apex of your thighs, kissing at each leg to make his intentions known. Those must be some good holo-vids you’re watching, tinman. You let him push your legs apart with his chin, receiving a soft kiss on each one once they were far enough apart for him to stuff his face in between.

Your back arched, hard, followed by the most ragged moan you‘d ever heard escape your throat. The grip on your thighs kept you in place as he lapped at your clit, sucking and teasing in an experimental way. His inexperience didn’t seem to matter, his hunger for you fueling his efforts and making you squirm in delight. Your hands sought desperately for something to grab onto to keep yourself grounded, finding his lovely curls to bury your fingers in deep. It was all you could do to hold on for dear life, tangling in his hair and struggling to breathe as he worked you into a frenzy.

The noises coming from below your waist were heavenly, wet and greedy in between his hums of contentment. It took you a while to realize they weren’t hums at all, but alien words of worship being prayed at your sinful altar; but the blood pounding in your ears and the gasps from your throat were too loud for you to hear his devotion.

“Beep beep!” Five minutes remain. Fuck.

The Mandalorian’s efforts doubled, running his tongue almost too quickly in his attempt to eat you alive. You let your hips grind into his mouth, begging him to bring you your release, and it wasn’t long before he succeeded. Stars flashed behind your eyes as you came into his hot open mouth, but he refused to leave until he had drank his fill of you. Eventually he pulled his face away from your spent heat with agonizing slowness, as if he would rather drown than address the impending drop from hyperspace. He kissed at your shaky thighs, your soft belly, and each breast before pressing his lips into your panting mouth, pushing the taste of you onto your own tongue. His breath was ragged, and you could feel the sweat of his brow where it was pushed against your face.

He lifted away from you, and the weight of the handmade mask was draped over your face, making you groan with the displeasure of your passion being cut short. However, once it was in place, it was almost immediately pushed under by strong fingers to lift its edge, and you were given one last kiss to swear his promise of return to you.

“Din. My name is Din.”

<-Previous Next->

TAG LIST @mrsparknuts @cookiejuicedesu @mandoinevarro @kaermorons

#the mandalorian #the mandalorian x you #the mandalorian x reader #self insert #bargaining with beskar

199 notes · View notes

help-im-a-gay-fish · 4 years ago

Text

Brightly Shone The Moon That Night. A Dark-Cream Christmas story.

The following is a slice of life story about my Dark-Cream family at Christmas. It exists in a universe different to @zu-is-here cannon. In this universe positive emotions are not fatal to Shattered so Cross and Dream didn't rush to break the curse. It splits off around 'things will never be the same' or 'the price of happiness'. The twins were created before the last 3 chapters of Dark-Cream were drawn. Any changes to the story or changes to the characters should be accepted as being part of an alternative timeline. Thank you. Enjoy. Original cross and dream belong to jakei95 and joku blog. Original shattered dream belongs to @galacii. This design for shattered is based off the one by @zu-is-here and the Dark-Cream story is also by @zu-is-here. Most of the Story will be under the cut.

"isn't this a bit much?" the gloopy one said, as his partner wrapped a scarf around his neck.

"nope" the former guard replied "can't have you getting frost bite my love"

Dream simply rolled his eyes. "but I can't really get cold? Or even hot for that matter"

"what are you talking about? you're always hot" Cross replied with a sly smile. This earned a confused look from the smaller skeleton, as Cross carefully tied the scarf and gently folded it under Shattered's jacket. Though it became clear to Cross that Dream had twigged what he'd meant a moment later, evident by the creeping gold blush spreading across his face.

The golden guardian playful punched Cross in the shoulder. "Shush you, keep in clean in front of the little ones"

At that Cross couldn't help but smile and turn his head to his two daughters. The two were in their cot, all dressed in snuggly winter clothes, waiting for their Dad's to be done getting ready. Celest was dressed in a cosy jumper with a little bobble hat, while Luna wore a full bodied coat. Their consistent look of confusion and wonder changed into toothless smiles when their dad looked at them. (idk how teething works for skeletons..... Teeth magically form or something......also tbh they should start teething soon) it warmed Cross' soul.

His attention was drawn back to dream by the sound of metal being placed down on wood. He looked to him, seeing that he'd removed his crown band and set down on the bedside table. Dream then sighed and sagged his shoulders. "it.... It feels wrong not having something on my head"

Cross chuckled.

The 4 of them where taking a trip out today. This was something both Dream and Cross had agreed was a good idea.

Cross' eye lights travelled back to the little ones. They seemed so innocent right now, as if recent events hadn't happened. As if the last two weeks hadn't been difficult to get through.

Celest's code had been burning her a lot, to the point where she'd screamed when either of them had tried to hold her, or even touch her. As for Luna, her throat had become clogged with more gloop then ever before. So much Shattered had to use a tentacle to pull some of it out. She had surely been 5 seconds from suffocating.

It had been a fortnight of sleepless nights, screaming babies and a large amount of arguing. The stress of the situation had pushed them very far apart. Many things had been said, old wounds jabbed at, tears shed. But after a lot of long talks they had sorted out each fight. They were a lot stronger then some petty arguments. There was no room in their relationship for emotional strain......not anymore. The two loved each other, it had just been a difficult time.

In recent days, the twins seemed to have recovered to a stable state. Back to the laughing, smiling, Cow lovers. Cross never thought he'd be so happy that they'd started playing with their cow collection again.

After a long talk with his finance, the two concluded that they'd all been stuck in the void space for way to long. Even with the few rooms and furniture, it's not like there was much to do there and a serious cabin fever had developed. So while the twins were in a good place, they had to take the opportunity to spend some time together as a family.

Cross once again looked back at his partner. Only to need to do a double take. Dream was wearing a hat now. A festive white one with golden stripes running across it. It was reminiscent of a classic Santa hat, other then the colours. The fabric had black stains in several places due to where Dream had touched it. Though despite that Cross recognised it all to well. To his dismay, he felt his face slowly get warm. Their first kiss.

He could remember it clearly in his mind, the mistletoe, the hotel, Gaster sniggering in the corner. But mostly, Dream. The sweet, positive skeleton from back then was very different to the one who stood before him now. But he wouldn't have it any other way.

Remembering that day caused his blush to darken. It had truly been one of the most embarrassing, but best days of his life. Though a part of him wondered how Dream still had the hat. After everything, the hat had been saved.

"you've still got that hat?" he said, in a half teasing tone.

Shattered smirked at Cross' flushed face "of course, so many good memories".

A stream of positivity ran through him and with it, it brought a sudden, but expected twinge in his soul. It was a sharp pain, like a knife being slowly pressed in. Dream tried to ignore it but he visually flinched causing Cross to come over.

"positivity again Dreamboat?" he questioned.

Dream nodded "it's alright, I'm used to it" The guardian sensed some sadness from Cross, even if he kept a natural face.

"I'm OK Crossy, promise!"

Cross sighed and gently kissed Shattered's forehead. "if you say so my love"

With that he walked back over to the twins so that he could get their carriers. Dream sighed slightly. It was strange seeing Cross in an outfit different to his guard uniform. So much so that Dream already kind of missed it, not that Cross didn't look handsome is what he was currently wearing.

The last time the family had left the void to go shopping, (which is really a story in itself) they had been stared at from all angles. Every man, women and child. Monster or human, had taken part in watching them. Like animals in a zoo. Cross had insisted that it was the twins they were staring at, since his children were so beautiful that of course people would stare. But in the end both him and Dream knew the real reason.

They were staring at them.

He couldn't really blame them though, how often do you come across a monster with heterochromia wearing what was best described as fancy dress, accompanied by a slime covered skeleton in heels and a crown? Many things had changed since the apple incident, but people staring as he passed had not.

Today they both wanted a peaceful day with their babies, so they had opted to wear more normal clothes. Cross had traded his normal cape and jacket for a puffy white winter coat which he wore a red jumper under. Dream had opted for something similar, though a deep brown colour as to not show the stains so much. It felt odd being in a new outfit, but also very nice. There was only so long someone could take being in tight trousers and shirts with big collars.

The former guard straightened up, clutching a harness in his hands.

"these were definitely a good buy" he said, as he walked back to Dream.

Dream raised an eyebrow "did you really 'Buy' them Cross?" he said is a inquisitive tone.

Cross' body tensed and his partner gave him an sharp stare. Even without his emotion sensing ability, Dream could read Cross like a book.

"uhhhhhhh.......yes?"

"sure" Dream replyed, with slight amusement in his voice.

A nervous chuckle came from Cross. "look they were a good thing to get ok?....... Very helpful for the little ones"

Dream gave him an unsure nod. He still wasn't exactly well versed in child care, so he wasn't really sure what these harnesses where even for yet. Since he figured that the answer was probably obvious, he didn't ask.

"want me to help you get it on?" Cross asked, raising an eyebrow. Shattered wasn't the only one who could easily read his partner.

Shattered said nothing but nodded. His golden blush reappeared when Cross started to run his hands across and around his body to get the harness into place. His soul gave a tiny learch for a moment, but not one of pain.

He knew there was a part of him that wanted Cross to touch his soul again, It had been such a close experience for them both and had brought about a lot of pleasurable feelings. It was truly something he wanted to experience again. A feeling he almost craved. But he knew all to well, as his eye sockets fixed onto the cot to his right, that the potential consequences made it impossible. He was just going to have to live with these unmet desires. Just as he was sure that Cross lived with similar ones.

"there all done"

Dream jumped. Snapped out of his thoughts by his future husband's voice.

Now the harness was all attached. Not too tight, but not too lose. He could see that he now had a pocket on his chest which he guessed the baby sat in. Clever. It was kind of like a kangaroo pouch.

Cross strapped a identical carrier around his own chest and walked over to the babies cot to collect his daughters.

Luna smiled wide at the sight of him. The older skeleton matched her smile and slowly picked his child up. Luna giggled and kicked her tiny feet out as he did. Her tentacle flickered around the corners of her mouth as she laughed. Cross could feel his own joy fill him at the sight. But he nullified it for his partner's sake.

Speaking of which, he turned back to Dream.

"you wanna take Celly or Lu Lu?" he asked.

"I'll take Luna" the smaller skeleton replied "since you are already holding her". He held his arms out in an awkward, slightly unsure way.

Cross gave a soft, knowing smile "Its OK Dreamboat, I'll help you get her in the carrier"

Shattered sighed, irritated by his own incompetence and nodded.

With that Cross carefully attempted to slip the wriggling baby into her carrier. Which wasn't easy, as she cheerfully shifted her legs around. In fact Cross had a slightly hard time keeping hold of her.

After much difficulty, Cross managed to feed her legs through the leg holes and sit her safely inside. The whole time, Dream remained mostly still, he didn't want to do anything in case he ended up hurting Luna.

Once she was buckled in, Cross took a slow step back to admire his handy work. Luna bounced excitedly in her carrier and her Papa looked almost comically uncomfortable by all her movement.

"do you want me to take her Day Dream?" Cross said, upon noticing Dreams unease around the wiggling baby. Dream shook his head "no, its fine" he replied as he relaxed his shoulders. "you get Celest and we can go"

Cross gave a nod and turned back to the cot. As he went to pick up his slightly younger daughter, he noticed that she had in fact fallen asleep. Cross sighed - not again....

For most parents, the time when the children slept was a time of bliss, and after a fortnight of little sleep, Cross almost agreed. But his child had a habit of falling asleep suddenly and for long periods. Dream had told him that when this happened her energy levels were low, showing that her body couldn't regulate itself fully.

With another sigh, Cross carefully picked up the sleeping baby and slipped her into the carrier. It was very hard to wake her when she was like this, but he was still extra careful. Not waking a sleeping baby was basically a universal law, though he would have to if she was asleep to long. After double checking that she was safely inside and her head was supported, he walked back over to Dream.

"any particular preference for an au Dream boat?" he asked

Shaking his head, Dream replied "Not really, just try and get a pacifist timeline"

With a nod, Cross extended his arm. There was a spark of magic at his figure tips and his knife materialised. He dragged it through the air in a fluid motion, as he did it split the air as if it where a piece of cloth. It was a causal splitting of space and time. Simple.

Luna watched her dad with a look of wonder. Her silver eyes where wide and bright.

"gahhhhh daaaaag" she cooed and reached for him.

Cross glanced back at her with a smile "just you wait Princess, when you are older I'll teach you how to do this"

These words hung heavily in the air for a moment, as Cross carefully finished opening the portal. The same thing was on both Cross and Dreams minds.

If you get older.

With a sigh and a snap of his fingers, the knife was gone and the portal was open.

"After you" Cross said, stooping into a slight bow and winking at his fiancé.

Dream covered his mouth with his hand and fake giggled. "Oh what a gentleman" he said with a large smile across his face before walking forward and entering the portal.

The first thing that hit Dream as he reached the other side, was a cold crisp breeze. The chill made him feel grateful that he was wearing his boots, even if they were old and an obnoxious shade of yellow.

The breeze blew lightly causing Luna to shiver. There was no wind in there home, so this brought a welcome change to Shattered. He took a deep breath into his non existent lungs.

It was evening. Strange? He figured that their sense of time must have been thrown out a little. They did live in a void after all. However it was a pleasant evening, with sky littered with stars and a full moon.

Shattered allowed himself to bask in the fresh air for a while, as he heard footsteps behind him and the portal close.

"Oh it's good to be outside again" came Cross' voice from behind.

With a nod, Shattered turned around to face his partner. Luna wriggled more in her carrier, looking around at all the new things she'd never seen before.

"someone is excited" Cross said, leaning down and kissing his daughter on the forehead. She giggled and very nearly headbutt him as he did. Chuckling, he pulled away.

The guard looked around "looks like we're in a small town... If I had to guess its the surface"

The two of them started to look around, trying to find something to engage with. It wasn't long before they spotted something.

Both skeletons attention was caught by something in the near distance. A large crowd of people. Among them were people in hats, jumpers and coats, carrying bags and cups of hot drinks. A vast amount of stalls and stands were among them, not to mention fur trees in fancy dress and lights. Hundreds and hundreds of lights.

"a Christmas Market!" Dream said, his voice hinting an excitement "I've never been to one! I forgot that it was this time of the year"

His excitement felt like a balloon filling inside him. Only to be burst when his soul gave a sting inside his ribs.

But Dream couldn't help but feel a little happy, this was such a good thing to come across, perfect for their trip out.

Cross tilted his head "how do you know what Christmas is my love? It's more of a human custom".

"well that's easy" Dream said, a slight smugness in his voice at the fact he seemed more knowledgeable then Cross about something.

"Christmas is a time where positive emotions take hold, even in the darkest of times, positively rules here"

He eye lit up slightly as he spoke. Even if Dream was corrupted, and technically not the positivity guardian anymore, he was still happy to talk about it. It reminded him of easier times.

"as the former positively guardian it was only natural for me to learn about the festival...." his voice turned somba for a moment "Heaven taught me...... remember?"

There was another heaviness in the air at those words. A unspoken guilt and regret and then a thought. Dream now possessed the very power that had killed him.....

The gloopy one sighed and straightened the baby carrier. Luna gurgled as he did so.

"he would have loved to meet these two wouldn't he" he spoke, his voice twisting in its somba state.

"yeah... But it's ok" the guard replied, taking Dreams hand.

"in a way, he is here" he said in a soft tone, running his finger across Dreams ring. A smile ran across his face before he realised Shattered's hand.

After a short moment of silence they were disturbed by a soft noise. Celest had woken from her sleep. She wriggled and shifted against Cross' chest, her tiny voice gurgling.

"Nice of you to join the party Sweet pea" Cross said, upon noticing.

"we should probably get going, before she falls asleep again" Dream stated in reply. Cross nodded.

The family started to walk together towards the market. As they approached the air was filled with the smell of food and the sound of cheesy pop songs. The emotions of the people around them where starting to fill in.

The first thing that Dream felt was a lot of emotion around him. He was going to need to take a moment to get used to it. From what he could feel it was primarily positive, but then he felt something else.

To his right he felt anger and frustration. That wasn't the kind of thing that he expected this time of year, so he turned his head slightly. There was a human and a monster stood in the huddle.

He caught a few words of what they were saying.

"typical every year you leave gift buying to the last minute" said one.

"it's not completely last minute" said the other.

"it's the 23rd! How is that not last-" and then he was out of ear shot.

"23rd?" Shattered said to himself "huh.... It was my birthday 2 days ago". He counted on his fingers for a moment, trying to figure out how old that made him.

"it was!? Oh my goodness that's right!" came a voice from his side. It was slight panic from Cross. Uh oh.

Dream waved his hands in a jazz hand fashion "woah woah woah, before you go flying off the handle, we both didn't realise-

"I'm so sorry my love!"

Shattered groaned. Here we go.

"I can't believe I forgot! I'll make it up to yo-

Dream cut Cross off with a peak on the teeth. Cross jumped and his face flushed.

"......... Cross, I'm going to have hundreds more birthdays... Its OK if we skip one" the guardian whispered before nuzzling his gloopy face against him. "presides.... We had more important things to worry about"

As if on que both twins cooed.

A little smile creeped on to Cross' face. Dream mirrored it.

"now let's stop standing here go to the market" he held his hand out "it's waiting for us".

With a soft smile, Cross took his hand and they started walking again. It wasn't long before they finally reached the market.

The market was busy.

Both humans and monsters were walking around, talking happily. Children of all ages were rushing around with chocolates in their hands and candy canes in their mouths. Positive emotions were swirling like the snow in the wind. A warm blend of joy, song and family.

The smells of cakes and and pies were everywhere. Hot wine, ginger, cinnamon, dried fruit and nuts. Coffee, chutney, jams and cheeses.

For Dream it was like being spun in a giant bath of spice. The smells did not help his developing headache. There where positive emotions everywhere, every angle.

He let go of his partner's hand and stumbled slightly. The emotions were threatening to make him collapse as they came at all sides. Being in a void space for so long meant he'd gotten used to only Cross' emotions being around. But now there must have been 100 people at lest.

With the surrounding area becoming a blur, the sky and ground became one and he felt something hit his back and press it.

After a moment of silence he could hear the sound of a baby crying from off in the distance. Someone was calling his name but he could hardly hear it as the crying baby got closer. But eventually both got clearer.

"Dream! Dream are you OK!? Can you hear me?"

It was Cross.

"C.... Cross?" he said, looking for his partner's face. He eventually found it, hovering above him.

"why....." he said reaching his heavy arm up "why are you flying?"

The former guard gave him a confused expression. A moment later, Dream realised that the pressure on his back was in fact the floor and he was laying on it.

"you collapsed" said Cross with a pained expression. Cross' worry and stress washed over Dream and snapped him back to reality. The crying baby was very close. In fact it was coming from his chest.

Dream pushed himself onto his elbows and looked down. Luna was crying and wriggling in her carrier.

"oh.... OH!" Shattered said as a sudden and huge instinct hit him. Something he'd not really felt up till this point. Caring not about his state, he pulled her out of the carrier and rocked her in his arms.

"shhhh shhh it's ok, I'm sorry sweetheart, are you hurt?"

If Dream hadn't just collapsed, Cross would have felt happy at the sight of him comforting Luna. The tiny skeleton quieted down, but her non-existent lip was still trembling. Shattered inspected her, happy not to find any marks that would indicate she'd been hurt by the fall. Probably just scared.

"what happened my love?" came Cross' voice again.

"emotions" Dream bluntly responded, before attempting to get to his feet. He hadn't gotten far when he felt his partners hands grip his and help him pull up. He'd barely just gotten to his feet when things started to blur again and his head started to once again throb.

He fell forward slightly into Cross' chest, the guard put his arms around him to support him and keep him steady. He had to be careful to make sure the babies didn't get squished.

Cross' fiancé give out a low, pained groan and Luna give a wine of discomfort.

"Keep hold of her Dreamboat, I'll find somewhere where you can sit down" he softly said, looking around to find a seat. Luckily he spotted a park bench not to far from them.

Cross slowly and gently guided Dream backwards until Dream's legs brushed against the bench and he was able to slowly sit down. He sank his weight against the wooden frame, his limbs felt heavy and his head felt horrible. After a short time he started to adjust. Feeling himself coming back into reality, Shattered adjusted his hold on Luna to make sure he didn't drop her. Cross kneeled in front of them both.

"we can always go home if it's to much for you"

Immediately Dream shock his head, which he regretted a second later as the dizziness ramped.

"no Crossy, we both agreed we needed some time out of the void. ...im sorry that I'm ruining it"

The tall skeleton lightly gripped Dreams shoulders and looked him dead in the eyes.

"you are not ruining anything"

He kissed the bridge of Dreams nose.

"you have made everything in my life better, don't forget that"

A smile ghosted Shattered's face at those words.

"you know.... You're blind, unconditional love for me is really cheesy" he said, his smile turning into a smirk.

"I do try"

The couple shared a laugh and Dream felt himself feel a bit better. He didn't feel great though. The emotions around him where still dizzying.

Behind Cross he could see the market. It truly did look like fun and he felt bad that he'd soured the mood. He continued to rock Luna and she turned around in his arms to burry her face into his chest.

"you should....." Shattered paused as another wave of dizziness hit him "You should go ahead of me, I'll catch up"

"Absolutely not" Cross stated firmly "I will not leave you, I refuse"

"Cross" Dream said in an equally as firmly manner "I can look after myself for 10 minutes, it will be fine..... I want you to go have some fun"

The guard's expression softened and he stood up again, running his hand across the back of his skull unsurely as he did. "I.... I don't know"

Dream rested Luna in his lap and reached his hands out, Cross took them.

"Cross, I want you to go ahead, I'll join you soon, I promise"

Letting go of Dreams hands, Cross sighed. "Alright..... But I'll come back in 15 minutes, if you are still here then we are going home"

Dream nodded slowly "Deal"

After a few more unsure moments Cross started to back away from Dream. He went slowly in order to give Dream time to tell him to stop. After he didn't, Cross turned and walked in the direction of the market.

As Shattered watched Cross walk into the market, he felt his daughter start to fuss in his arms. His golden eye travelled down to her again. She looked a bit confused or upset. Her emotions weren't developed enough to be easily readable by Shattered. But from what he could sense she was distressed by her dad walking away.

He looked back at Cross again, as the guard inspected what seemed to be a stand of various pastries and cakes. There was a sad, yet nostalgic smile on his face.

Shattered watched as he exchanged some words with the vendor and took Celest's little hand and waved it. Clearly he was introducing them. The vendor seemed to coo at the baby a little and Cross straightened up proudly. Probably bragging about something cute Celest had done recently.

After a few more words he put some coins on the counter and was handed a paper bag, containing what Dream had to assume was a pastry of some kind. He waved good bye to the vendor and started to walk away.

As he did, he took his food item out of its bag and went to take a bite. He locked eyes with Dream mid-bite and gave him a slight deer in the headlights look. After finishing taking his bite, he smiled and waved to his lover. Dream waved back.

It was clear from Cross' expression that whatever he was eating was very tasty and it caused Dream to wonder how much food Cross was going to buy tonight.

Luna fussed again as her father and sister got further away.

Luna and Celest had been almost inseparable since day one, Shattered was still a little unnerved by it. They were always most comfortable when together. Knowing this, Dream told himself that Luna was fussing because she was parted from her sister. But another thought came to him.

What if she was sad about Cross leaving?

It was a stupid thing to think, both babies had been apart from Cross before and not responded this way. Yet the thought wouldn't leave him. It was the kind of thought that bounces around your head and burrows into you the moment you try to forget it.

The first time he left them with me for an extended period of time, I'd tried to....

A chill ran over him followed by a long twang of guilt, which caused him to tighten his grip on his daughter. Cross still didn't know about that night and he wasn't sure he could ever tell him. What was wrong with him? He acted like he cherished them these days (or at lest most days), but how could he when he'd thought of doing such a thing? When all he'd felt upon seeing them for the first time was nothing. His eyes stung and threatened to start crying. In that moment he felt tempted to call Cross back and have him wrap his arms around him. But he couldn't. Not while Cross didn't know.

"I'm sorry that I'm not the best parent to you Mi hija"

The words left his mouth as barely even a whisper. They sounded if he'd not been aware he said them. As if he'd not fully intend to say them out loud. His throat was dry and his soul was burning and twisting.

Cross says you are getting better.

One part of him said

But who's to say they will live to see you be better?

He answered to himself.

He felt the fabric of his jacket get tugged slightly. This drew his attention back to Luna.

She had turned in his arms slightly and was looking up at him with wide eyes. If Shattered hadn't known better, he'd have thought he could sense her worrying. Her tiny fist was curled in the fabric of his coat.

"paaaaaa gaa?"

Dream sighed.

"I get a lot of things wrong..... And I'm going to keep getting things wrong, I might be wrong most of the time"

The former guardian continued to speak in a near whisper, his finger stroking the tiny creature's cheek.

"but I'm going to get some things right as well...... And I'll make a deal with you"

Luna's face scrunched up a little. It was almost amusing to see, as if she was thinking really hard.

"if you and your sister keep on fighting, I'll keep on trying" Luna turned her face into his hand and chewed his glove.

"if you stick around long enough, you'll see a day when I get things right most of the time.... You want to see that right?"

"maaaaaa"

"deal?"

"gahhh gahh"

Dream laughed slightly "I'll take that as a yes"

He looked away from her again. Cross had completely disappeared from his view now, probably off stuffing chocolates. Since Dream wasn't someone who needed to eat, he didn't fully understand, but the sweet and warm smells in the air were very pleasant. He'd not eaten a thing for at least two and a half years, maybe he could try a little something. Carefully he slipped the tiny skeleton back into her carrier and fastened her in.

"Should we go check out the market mi pequeña estrella?" he asked, finally getting back to his feet. His daughter gave a gurgle of approval.

"then let's go shall we"

The atmosphere of the market was all together jolly. As he walked into the heart of it, his head throbbed again, but he didn't feel dizzy. He'd adjust to it fully soon.

Despite what he would want to admit, he felt a very slight anxiety without Cross by his side. He was in no way dependent on Cross, but he was so used to having him near, it was strange to have him absent. To not be able to feel his energy or be able to hold his hand.

No Dream! He thought. Don't be such a baby.

He patted his daughters head with his hand absentmindedly, feeling the fabric of her bow slip down slightly as he did. She giggled and a smile creeped onto Dreams face as she did.

A stand caught his eye. It was a stall of what seemed to be jewellery. As many of the stalls were, it was adorned with colourful lights and decorations of all shapes. Though this one in particular stood out to him. He wasn't sure why, but he decided to approach it.

The monster running the stand stiffened as he approached, but he paid it no mind. He could see the jewellery much closer now. Each piece seemed unique and hand made. There were bracelets, earrings, rings and necklaces, shimmering in all different colours. He greatly enjoyed looking over each individual piece, until his eye socket landed on one.

It was a necklace. Gold, set with a blueish purple stone. There was a small crescent charm on the chain as well. Dream stared at it and knitted his eyebrows. For a moment he wasn't sure why it caught his eye. But as he moved his hand up and traced his thumb across the stone, he realised. He then retracted his hand is if he'd been shocked. He stepped back and folded his hands together, but his sight remained locked on it.

Where are you? Are you even still alive?

A long sigh left his mouth as he forced himself to think of something else. But as he turned to walk away, he glanced at it again. It was almost like he couldn't bare to leave it.

I'm being silly, I'm a man, why would I need a necklace anyway?

With that, he tore his eyes away and proceeded to the next stand. As before the monster running it tensed slightly.

This vendor was selling what seemed to be plastic toys and figures. These weren't home made and seemed to be just the same old toys you could buy anywhere. There was doll house items, human figures and animals. He was so busy looking over the collection, that he didn't notice as his daughter reached for her favourite animal. He was only alerted to what she was doing by a slobbery squish sound.

She had suck the head of the toy into her mouth and was chewing on it.

"Luna no!" Shattered said "I don't want to have to buy that"

Carefully his pulled the plastic cow from his daughters mouth. A thin trail of a mix between gloop and saliva followed it. He had no idea how one baby could produce so much spit so fast. He wiped some off on his coat, but it didn't come close to cleaning it. Yeah....... he was going to have to buy it. He had a small purse of gold coins that Cross had given him. He hadn't asked where Cross had gotten the coins, it was probably best not to.

As he handed it to the seller and asked for the price, the slimy coating ran onto his fingers. Yuck. Not that he could really talk though, he was almost completely covered in something worse.

Dream expected to feel anger or disgust come from the stall owner. But instead he could only sense fear. His eye locked with the eyes of the monster behind the counter. It didn't take long for him to realise. Cross might have treated him like he was the most beautiful and sweet skeleton in the multiverse, but that didn't stop his appearance from being...... Striking at best.

He grimaced and handed the monster the money he owed and took back the toy.

"have a nice evening" he said, trying to sound friendly.

"y-you too sir.... Merry Christmas"

He turned away from the stall and walked back into the market. After inspecting the toy to make sure there was nothing small that she could choke on he handed it back to Luna. She happy put it back in her mouth, flicking his hand with her mouth tentacle as she did.

Shattered felt a burst of joy from his daughter, which made him light headed for a moment. After collecting his bearings he smiled.

"Adorable idiot" he said leaning over and kissing the top of her head. "now let's go find Daddy shall we?"

It wasn't a market that was too large, just a fair amount of stalls and stands and a handful of people. There was no doubt that he and Cross stood out, so it shouldn't be to hard to find his partner.

If I where cross.... Where would I go?

The answer came to his mind not even a second after asking it.

Chocolate...

As he'd noted before, there was a vast amount of edibles all around him. Mostly foods of the sweet variety, commonly fruity cakes and pies. But it wasn't long till he saw what he wanted. Out of the corner of his eye socket, he spotted what he was looking for. Just as he'd expected, chocolate.

Humans and normal monsters, seemed to be fascinated in forming chocolate into many different shapes. Animals, people, stars and bells. Shattered supposed that they got more pleasure consuming the sweet substance when it involved biting the head off of a defenceless reindeer, or mutilating a Santa or two.

He approached the stall of chocolate items. It was a pleasant smell, reminding him strongly of Cross' coat. There was no doubt the guard would have come here. He just had to find him.

Meanwhile, as Shattered looked for him, his mate was busy in a hearty conversation with his daughter.

The guard slipped a snowflake shaped chocolate into his mouth, having finished off the pastry long ago.

"now what should be get for Papa as a late birthday present hmm?" he asked Celest as she blew a spit bubble. "Something simple, you know he doesn't like flashy things"

Celest continued to blow a spit bubble and watched it as it expanded. "why is it that he must be so difficult to shop for....

His voice trailed off as he continued to ponder the question. What to get someone who didn't like material things. Other then his scarf, his ring and his crown, Dream never held onto things. Maybe he could get him a new accessory, like a new piece of jewellery or something. He continued to think and slipped another chocolate into his mouth. As he did this, without him noticing, the tiny skeleton had popped the spit bubble and was now reaching for the candy cane sticking out of his shopping bag full of goodies. She grabbed it and without hesitation, plunged the bright stripped stick into her mouth without a care.

After not even a second her face screwed up and she recoiled. She let out a wine of regret and disgust, which alerted Cross that she was distressed.

"No sweetie , that's pepper mint" the guard sighed, plucking the now sticky candy from his daughters hands. He put it on the counter of the stand they were stood next to. A stall selling Christmas fauna such as Holly, pinecones and mistletoe.

As he set the candy down, he saw daughters face still looked unhappy. "that must have tasted horrible" he said, dabbing the spit from around her mouth with his sleeve.

"we'll get you some nice warm milk when we get home ok?" he said in a baby voice, bouncing her slightly to try and cheer her up. It worked and she giggled. Cross sighed in relief, crisis averted.

He thought back to his question about presents. About Dream. It had been a little while since he'd left him. It would probably be a good idea to go back.

"Now if you are done sampling my treat bag Celly, maybe we should go check on-

"hey" came a voice from up close to his left. He jumped. After a second he realised he recognised the voice and turned to meet Dreams gaze, some chocolate still on his cheek. He was about to say something about how it was go to see that Dream was feeling better, when Dream spoke.

"wanna prove you aren't just a 20g wager?" the golden guardian said, with a slightly sly smile.

For a moment Cross was confused. Had the emotions caused his partner to go loopy? Before he could ask, Dream pointed his finger upwards. Feeling more confused, Cross glanced up. He could now see that they were in fact stood under a mistletoe. Quite a few actually. The sight of the white berried plant made his cheeks flush. He'd fallen right into Dream's trap. How had he not noticed.

He swallowed what was left of the snowflake the chocolate in his mouth "uhh um.... Uh"

He locked eyes with Dream again, finding that he'd taken a step closer. Taking a gloved hand and cupping Cross' cheek, he said.

"I'll take that as a yes"

With that he gently pulled Cross' face closer, till the gap was closed between them with a soft kiss. Cross' soul fluttered as Dream leaned in more to kiss him stronger. The taste of chocolate in his mouth was soon replaced with the flavour of bitter apple sauce. But he didn't mind it, he much liked apple sauce. Unfortunately the kiss wasn't long lived. The two were forced to separate after feeling their daughters starting to fuss, since they were being pressed between them. Dream stepped back slightly, giving his children room and took a breath of winter air. The euphoria from the kiss surged through him, as it had been a while since they had and therefore felt really good.

In fact, It had been a while since they'd done a lot of things. Including telling Cross that he........... That's something he needed to fix and fix straight away. His eyes locked on Cross.

"Te quiero, mi soldado" Dream said, with his face dusting gold. He looked away and pulled his scarf over his face slightly.

Cross returned his blush and smiled "yo tambien Te quiero, mi sol"

191 notes · View notes

dreamescapeswriting · 4 years ago

Text

Secret Santa ~ KNJ [Day Seventeen: Advent Calendar]

WORD COUNT: 2.9K

GENRE: Fluffy, friends to lovers, angst? (idk if its angst, maybe a little im sorry!!) fluffy ending, first kiss, Christmas prompts

PAIRING: Kim Namjoon x Fem!Reader

The BigHit lounge was unusually cold this morning, you were sitting on the sofa with Kai and Jimin curled up under a thick blanket Jimin had managed to steal from Yoongi's studio.

"If he finds us with this, you're taking the heat." You mumbled to Jimin as Kai came over to the sofa holding a cup of hot chocolate to help you warm up, it had been snowing all night and morning you were surprised you were still here.

"Yoongi won't mind, he loves you," Kai added when he saw Jimin struggling to come up with something to say, you rolled your eyes at the two of them as they snuggled up with you.

"Are we still doing secret Santa today?" You questioned as you began blowing cold air into the top of your hot chocolate dying to get a sip of it already. It was a week before everyone would be going on the Christmas break which meant it was time for cheesy gifts and a mini Christmas at the BigHit building like they did every year but this year was different. This year you'd somehow been roped into joining in on the idols Secret Santa game, you were putting the full blame onto your best friend -- Jungkook -- who seemed to be more than excited for you to be participating in it this year.

"Yeah, Jungkook said he'll bring the bucket with names in around later. Do you have training?" Jimin asked as he put his cup down on the coffee table, you weren't an idol like them. You'd been an actress under BigHit for a long time and now you were finally starting to kick start your singing career along with another solo singer that had recently joined BigHit.

"I've got the next two weeks off, I saved my holiday days," You smiled at him smugly and he glared at you, you knew Jimin liked to use his holiday day's right away whenever he could.

"Look at me taking the time-" He was cut off from mocking you when the door to the lounge opened and Jungkook appeared there holding a bowl of names. Unknown to you and the boys there was a second bowl sitting underneath the first one with Namjoon's name scribbled all over the pieces of paper so he could insure you got him and you could be his secret Santa. He'd been planning this for weeks wanting you to get him so you could somehow confess your feelings to him. You'd been best friends with Jungkook for years, long before he joined BigHit which meant you were now close to the boys, spending a lot of time with them. You eventually grew one-sided feelings for Namjoon which didn't go unnoticed by your best friend who was quick to try and make things work between you both. It didn't work out well though when you couldn't even be in a room alone with Namjoon if someone else was with you though you both seemed to get along perfectly together and it was like you had been close friends for a while.

"Jimin and Kai first," The boys jumped out of their seats ready to take names from the bowl. Kait ended up picking Yoongi and Jimin got Jungkook so they wanted to head out shopping right away,

"I'll go later. Going to wait for the snow to stop." You told them as you said goodbye, while you were busy Jungkook switched the bowls over so Namjoon's name would be the only one you could pick out and he smiled innocently at you,

"I'll take you shopping at the weekend, you can help me pick something for Soobin," He chuckled trying to make it seem as though this was a normal conversation and that he wasn't nervous about you picking out a name.

"Can I go again?" You stuttered out when you unrolled the piece of paper,

"Nope, first choice only." You whined out as he put the bowl down and peaked to look at who you got as if he didn't already know.

"Do you know what to get him?" You nodded your head slowly, it would be a lie if you hadn't already thought it through the moment you saw his name on that tiny piece of paper.

"Is there a budget?" You put the piece of paper into your jeans and Jungkook shook his head, eager to see what you would be getting Namjoon for the gift.

"What did you have in mind?" You smiled softly as you thought back on the perfect Namjoon gift you'd seen a couple of weeks ago. It was a bonsai tree that would have been perfect for his office space and it sprouted flowers once a year.

"N-Nothing special," You whispered even though it was a lie and he could tell that already,

"Tell me...You might give me some ideas. I'm completely stuck." You rolled your eyes playfully at Jungkook and rushed to grab your phone showing him the bonsai tree and then a painting set that came with everything he would need to get into painting.

"You already thought this through before picking him?" He was going to tease you, you could already tell from the tone of his voice so you playfully shoved him onto the sofa and began tickling his sides.

"It's not my fault!" You groaned as you stopped tickling Jungkook, he sighed as you laid your head down on his thighs and laid your legs over the rest of the sofa as if he was a therapist. His hands began playing with your hair,

"I just- I think about him all of the time. There's not a day that goes by when he isn't in my thoughts Guk...Is that weird?" He chuckled as you closed your eyes, running your hands over your face in frustration.

"It's called having a crush, you need to tell-"

"Nope!" You cut him off and covered your face with a pillow. As you and Jungkook were joking around in the lounge Namjoon walked past the door and looked inside to see what all the fuss was about. He smiled when he heard your laughter filling the air, your laugh always seemed to bring one of the biggest smiles to his face. It was one of his favourite things about you even though you were insecure about it, he'd noticed that too. Whenever you laughed too hard at something others didn't you covered your mouth with your hands and began to look at the floor nervously, but it made Namjoon's stomach flip at the sight of it.

"You act as you've never had a crush on someone before," Jungkook grumbled as you began straightening yourself up again, Namjoon stepped to the side of the door so neither of you could see him. He knew this was wrong to be spying on a conversation but he wanted to see who you had a crush on. Who he was possibly in competition with to get your attention.

"You don't get it, when I look at him it's like my whole world stops. I feel as light as a feather-"

"You can't talk to him while you're alone," Jungkook said as a matter of factly and so you threw a pillow into his face and began walking out of the room when you came face to chest with Namjoon.

"Whoa, Hi." You gasped as Namjoon's arms wrapped around your waist to stop you from tumbling onto your back and hurting yourself,

"Hi," He whispered back to you as he stared into your eyes, you began opening and closing your mouth like a fish as you tried to come up with some words to say to him but your head was empty. It was as if you'd forgotten every word in the English and Korean Language and were now just an empty-headed girl standing in front of her crush.

"Y/n? You alright? Did you hit your head?!" Namjoon panicked as he checked you over but you just nodded and scrambled away from him, rushing off in the direction of the toilets instead not wanting to be in front of him yet.

The secret Santa day was here and you were more than nervous about it, everyone seemed to be getting excited about the growing collection of presents under the tree in the main lounge.

"Who did you get?" Yoongi whispered as he saw you standing at the back of the room looking worried about something,

"I'm not telling, it's cheating." You nudged his stomach playfully and he wrapped his arm around your waist. Namjoon looked over at you both when he heard your laughter over everything else inside of the room and his heart sank. Was Yoongi the one you and Jungkook had been talking about? After you ran away from him the other day he'd convinced himself it was him and that his feelings for you were being returned but not he wasn't so sure about it.

"It's time!!! We'll go randomly! Yoongi, you're up first, come grab your bag." Hoseok announced as he stood in front of the tree. There was soft Christmas music playing through the speakers in the room, Hoseok and Jungkook wanted today to feel like a real Christmas with the huge family since you wouldn't be spending Christmas day together. There was even a Christmas dinner being cooked in the canteen for everyone, including the staff.

"You having a nice time?" You jumped a little when Namjoon's voice came out of nowhere, he was standing right beside you and whispering so that only the two of you could hear one another.

"It's nice, are you?" You managed to talk to him without stuttering which was good but you were putting it down to the fact that you were in a room full of people. Your stomach was doing flips and tricks as if it was some kind of performance act at the circus,

"Great, I was wondering if I could show you something later?" You looked up at him wondering what it was that he wanted to show you but you nodded,

"Sure, w-what is it?" He smirked to himself as he looked down at the floor, hearing the stutter come from you only confirmed that it wasn't Yoongi you were crushing on and that he still had a good fighting chance with you.

"A song I've been working on, it's for you not for us." Your eyes widened as you looked up at him, he knew how much you were struggling to find a song you loved so much for your debut.

"Y-Yeah, sure...For me? A-Are you, my secret Santa?" He shook his head at your question, he'd hoped to have been because then he would have had an excuse to buy you something and spoil you but he hadn't been lucky enough.

"Namjoon, you're up," Jungkooked called out, Namjoon touched your side as a silent goodbye and walked over to the tree and picked up his box. Your pulse began tp pick up as you watched him closely, watching the way his eyes lit up the moment he took the bonsai tree from the bag and had a huge smile on his face. He began reading the small care card through before smiling and looking around the room for any signs as to who might have given him it but your eyes were on the floor.

Namjoon's studio was right next to Yoongi's so you headed into Yoongi first, giving him a hot chocolate and thanking him for the gift he'd gotten you. It was a selection of your favourite earring brand with a matching bracelet to go along with it. Then you went into Namjoon's studio, you pushed the door open without knocking since that was what he always told you to do but you saw him standing there with a member of staff, she was one of your stylists.

"I just thought it would be perfect for you, you love things like that right." Her fingers were running up and down Namjoon's chest as she stood really close to him, batting her false eyelashes and smiling up at him. Your chest tightened as you filled with anger, hurt and jealousy all at the same time, neither of them had heard you enter the room so you backed out and moved away from his door not wanting to see it. There was nothing for you to be jealous about, it wasn't as though you and Namjoon were dating, you were just friends...Colleagues even.

"What's wrong?" Jungkook questioned when you backed up against his chest,

"S-Someone was claiming that they got Namjoon's gift for him...My perfect gift-" Your voice broke as you thought about someone taking credit for something you'd done, something that had made Namjoon smile the biggest smiled you'd seen come from him.

"Oh hell no, I did not rig that game for someone else to come by and take credit!" You froze and Jungkook froze as soon as the words left his mouth,

"You what?" You questioned, your heart thumping with anger as you stared at Jungkook who was now trying to come up with something, anything he could say to get him out of this.

"Jeon Jungkook," You said in a warning tone but he ignored you, trying to walk away but you grabbed the lapels of his shirt and pushed him against the wall.

"What did you do?" He looked down at you and then up over your shoulder, Namjoon was just coming out of his studio to look for you. You were late for your meeting which wasn't like you at all,

"I rigged the game so you would be able to pick Namjoon...Then get him something that would make him see how much you have a crush on him." Jungkook was making sure to speak loud and clear enough for Namjoon to be able to hear every word you were saying but you were so angry at Jungkook you hadn't even noticed he was there yet.

"Are you stupid?! Why would I tell Namjoon I have a crush on him? He probably sees me as an annoying little sister or something! Not to mention someone just ruined your plan by telling him they got him the gift," You rambled on while Namjoon stood there with an amused look on his face,

"I knew she didn't get me it,"

"See he knows-" Your hands dropped from Jungkook's shirt and he scrambled away leaving you and Namjoon in the hallway together alone. Your mouth hung open as you pressed your back against the wall where Jungkook had been stood previously,

"You knew?" He nodded his head going into his pocket and pulling out a gift receipt, the price was hidden but your name was written on it along with everything else you'd bought that day.

"Fuck," Your groaned looking at the piece of paper as he walked closer to you and chuckled softly,

"I didn't know you liked the paint, and read these kinds of books..." Namjoon smirked as he saw you roll your head back and groan once again and he knew that they hadn't been for you but for him,

"You know you only had to get me one thing," He was now standing right on top of you, your faces were inches away from one another as he stared into your eyes. It was as if you were being hypnotised, his lips hovered above yours as you both closed your eyes,

"I-I wanted it to be perfect," You admitted right before he kissed you hungrily, his arms snaking around your waist drawing your body closer to his. Your hands instantly went into his hair, pulling at the brown strands and whinging as he went to pull away,

"Not here," He chuckled grabbing your hand and pulling you into his studio where he then pressed you against the door.

"Merry Christmas," He winked at you as he kissed you again just as eagerly as before running his hands up and down your sides as you pushed your tongue into his mouth.

"Merry Christmas," You whispered breathily back to him as you both pulled away and he smirked at you as he walked over to his desk and sat down. His bonsai tree had taken pride on his desk which made you smile brightly,

"Cute." You whispered taking a seat and putting it next to his chair, he glanced at you before leaning across and kissing you once again.

"The song I've been working on...It's kind of a confession to how I feel about you but I guess the kiss did that for me." Your smile brightened as he chuckled as you rushed to put the earphones on, you loved everything Namjoon took pride in so you were dying to hear it and it was perfect.

It explained everything as if you'd written it yourself, all of your feelings seemed to be the same as Namjoon's in the song and your heart swelled up.

"I-It's perfect," You whispered putting down the earphones carefully and bitting your lip,

"I erm...If it wasn't clear, I feel the same way." He laughed as you awkwardly admitted it to him, he reached out to touch your hand and squeezed it softly.

"It's clear...Don't worry," You felt your body heat up as he stared into your eyes and he smiled even bigger when he noticed how shy you were getting over it he couldn't help but think how cute you were going to be on your first date. He was already planning it out in his head as he stared at you.

Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @fan-ati--c @rjsmochii @callingmyangel @kneel-begyourpardon @taestannie @innersooya @sw33tnight @sweeneyblue1 @missmxqn @bisexualmess007 @oosnapitskat

160 notes · View notes

chronicasexual · 3 years ago

Note

If you wouldn't mind bestie, I'm gonna need that essay on the tdm movie.

inhales

ok here we go

Firstly, the interactions between Ruby and Liam felt so awkward and forced, which was nothing like their very natural bond in the books. It fell into the same problem of many dystopian and/or ya stories which try to force two characters together simply because they exist near each other's vicinity. I still feel mortified watching the scene in the movie where Liam said "iS tHaT wHy yOu dIdn'T wAnT tO kIsS mE." No hate to the actors, it's obvious they weren't given much to work with. Because of this, we never got to see those intimate moments between them felt so raw and comforting. The little things like Ruby instinctively reaching out to touch Liam's face and trying to pull away because she's anxious about her powers, but Liam keeps the hand there and says "Nope, mine now." Or the time she tells him that the space between them is a no-lie area (I can't remember the exact quote but you get the gist). The movie tries to fit their entire love story into an hour and a half and fails to do it effectively, to the point that I can't even understand how they fell in love at all. Oh and bonus cringe moment the scene at East River when everyone's dancing and they compare it to Hogwarts (bestie in what world????? if anything it's similar to camp half-blood) and they call each other Ginny and Harry or something like that before realising that the two end up together felt so unnecessary???? It made them so much more awkward than it needed to be and was obviously set up to make them feel embarrassed but also interested in each other.

Complaint two. Literally, what was the reason for making Chubs a Green? Is it not possible to be smart without a power to make you so? Chubs isn't smart because his ability made him that way, he's just smart because he is and even though he doesn't really admit it because it sounds unrealistic in their situation, he craves a further education. His powers never influenced him as a character, and he only used them two or three times overall. If anything it just played into the stereotype of the kid with glasses being the nerdy character who was also used as comic relief. (also maybe a slight loophole but if Chubs had been a Green wouldn't he had worked out EDO a lot quicker than Ruby did, because there's literally no reason for him not to have done so).

Mini rant but why did the movie make Ruby go back to her parents when she very clearly knew by now that she had erased herself from their memories. She knew they wouldn't recognise her. She had literally no reason to return and basically a waste of like five or ten minutes in the movie. And that small toy?? Maybe it's just me, but I don't get why it was so significant? Was it some sort of advertisement? idk

Also the eyes. The stupid glowing eye thing. Nowhere in the books did it mention them having LED eyes and NO ONE in the movies even brings up the fact that they have glowing eyes when they use their abilities. It's an unnecessary detail. Woudn't you think it would be super easy for PSFs to discover if someone was secretly an Orange hiding as a different colour at Thurmond if they just saw their eyes go orange when they activated and just shoot them🤡. Anyway, not to throw shade but instead of wasting the budget on making their eyes glow they could have actually given Sam a tiny bit more story instead of nothing, or including the bit about Jack and the letter, just saying :)

One final point probably because if I don't stop now I'll be here for ages and it's late but maybe I'll rant some more tomorrow. The movie removed so many compelling plot points that made the story what it is and removed details that were important to explanations. Movie Cate's explanation of "No kids, no economy." isn't accurate because in the book we find out a bunch of other things that happened whilst Ruby was at Thurmond that have led to the collapse of the economy. Sam? Removed. Martin? Removed. Jack? Removed. Ruby's mini argument over almost reading Jack's letter with Liam before having a deep conversation with him? Removed. Alongside a lot of other important thing. The movie feels so empty? It doesn't have much storyline to it, I get that the book was long but they removed so many things that it's an empty shell of what it could have been. The movie is kinda bland ngl. (apologies to anyone who may have enjoyed the movie. although if you did you probably never read the books)

One final final point because I just thought of it on the spot. Chubs saying "I knew you were Orange" very smugly makes no sense. Like. No. You. Didn't? She literally didn't show any signs of being an Orange to them and just existed. I know Greens are smart but he had nothing to infer that from. Actually maybe the glowing eyes gave it away my bad 🤡🤡🤡

#as you can tell im a little pissed #thanks for coming to my ted talk

12 notes · View notes

my-writings-and-musings · 4 years ago

Note

hey! so idk if you write platonic relationships but if you do, could you write something about whirl asking someone to be his amica endura? i just. i need more whirl love in my life and GODDAMN i love the way you write him sm gshdjf,,, thank you!! <33

I miiiiggghhht have gone a little overboard on this one and made it more of a short story than an answer... But I hope you like it! Thank you so much for the compliment, I do try my best to write Whirley well!

Whirl doesn't like to let fear boss him around. Ordinarily that's easy enough to accomplish, he's a big bot and threatening his life is a great way to end yours, and any threat he can't kill (for moral or legal reasons) can usually be ignored out of existence. As a result he's had very little to be afraid of these past few millennia, and he's even perfected his reflexes to the point he can quickly judge what reaction is warranted whenever that creeping feeling returns, meaning it never lasts more than a few minutes tops. It's a solid strategy, and the proof is that he's outlived everyone who's ever doubted it. Most of them, anyway. He's been getting sloppy since this whole quest thing.

Or more specifically, since he met you on this quest thing. The quest thing that's becoming less about the quest and more about the real treasure you've all gained along the way, which for once isn't the (many) guns he's found or the (countless) bad guy corpses he's left in the rearview mirrors.

Nope. It's you. The squishiest little air breather his optic has ever beheld, and darn the saps on this crew for rubbing off on him, because he wants to go out of his way to let you know that. Their silly insistence on honesty has made him feel like you need to know what you mean to him, and isn't that just ridiculous?

But if it's so ridiculous why was he scared? Because you could say no, damn it! You'd be silly not to! It was one thing for you to hang out with the ship's resident screw up and part time nutjob, maybe even have a drink with him, and sure you'd actually called him your friend and the two of you had looked death in the eye to insult its cataracts on more than one occasion together... But to officially declare to the crew and the universe you were Amica Endura and that you actually liked him?

You'd be mortified he even thought it was okay to ask, obviously. Then you'd wisely cut all ties and pretend you didn't know him, and he'd be left with... well, not nothing, but not much above nothing either. Worse actually now that he considered it, he'd probably be left with pain. The kind of pain you only got when you lost something, a particular experience he'd spent a very long time trying to ensure he'd never have to endure again, and he'd been doing pretty well until you showed up. But he wasn't mad at you, he was mad at himself, both for having the audacity to grow feelings and then getting soft enough to actually acknowledge them like a sap.

But facing fear was far better than the alternative. If he kept on pretending you were just another chum, that you didn't deserve the title of Amica for what you meant to him, then he'd have guilt. More guilt, to be specific, and he was already fully stocked on that. So... fear it was then. Fear and the inevitable pain that would follow when you did the only sane thing you could.

But hey, what was another mistake in the pile, right?

You'd been in your room by yourself, just relaxing an perusing the wonders of interstellar Wi-Fi, when he'd decided there literally couldn't be a better time. Some bots insisted that a proper ceremony required witnesses, but those bots couldn't judge him if there were no witnesses, now could they? Checkmate, seeing as how the two of you would definitely never speak to each other again after this... His claws had knocked on the door with as little force as he could muster, some part of him hoping you wouldn't hear and he'd have a reason to retreat, but as usual he also had to open his mouth and ruin that plan.

"Hey, Y/N, you uh... you alive in there?"

Approximating a facepalm as best he could without either half of the required components, his spark dropped when you replied with a good natured laugh, probably thinking he was just being his usual self and not making much sense. Which was true, just not in the usual way...

You'd happily opened the door with a command on your data pad, inviting him to come in and relax because you weren't up to anything anyway. Claws clacking together nervously, he'd entered with an unconvincing veneer of calm, far too worried to really pretend otherwise. Long legs carry him with slow steps, and he can't help but survey your room; he's certain this is the last time he'll ever see it. Your tiny belongings looking so ridiculously small in the Cybertronian sized living space, the ladders that have been welded to everything, gosh, is it foggy in here or is that just some emotional turmoil in his optic?

"Whirl? Are you okay?"

Of course not, but thanks for asking is what he wants to say, but a more accurate reply would involve him mentioning how things were actually really okay for a while... Until he'd started messing it all up, a process he'd be finishing up now so you could both move on with your lives.

"Oh... that's a matter of debate." He finally brings himself to say, claws firmly pinched to prevent him from any further tapping. You look more concerned than baffled, which is nice. Somehow you'd always managed to look past what he said to understand what he means. That's something he'll miss, once he finally manages to get this over with. Of course his voicebox is pitching a fit and refusing to cooperate, but it's going to be a simple series of steps once he gets it going. He'll ask you to be Amica, you'll refuse, and then he leaves. It's such a simple plan that even he can't find something to blow up in the process. Not for lack of trying, mind you...

"Is there something you need? You've been a little off lately." You said, putting aside your data pad to move to the edge of the berth. It hadn't escaped your notice that the usually loud mech had been growing quiet around you as of late, his one optic looking almost forlornly in your direction when he thought you were focused elsewhere, and so you sat and let your legs dangle off the berth to let him know you were listening. His antenna twitched backwards like a startled ear on a mammal.

"Me? Well, I'd be inclined to say..." Some half attempt at a joke died before it even could be set up, and he quickly decided the stalling had gone on long enough. If he had to endure one more second of gnawing apprehension he was going to have to destroy something exceptionally expensive to shake off the nerves, and he had just gotten his room the way he liked it. Better to go down with some dignity if he could. "You're spot on, actually. I've been off because I've got something I've gotta get off my chassis, but it's not gonna be fun for either of us. Still needs to be done though, ain't that a shame?"

Any other person on the ship would have been terrified if he'd said that to them. They'd have expected some kind of terrible bodily injury, no doubt, but you knew him better than that. You knew that if he wanted to hurt anyone it would happen as soon as he entered a room, and with something way more intimidating to kick off the fun. Instead your expression was just thoughtful, concerned, and only a little confused. "I... if it upsets you then yeah, but why do you have to do it?"

"Do you know what an Amica is?" He blurted out, the words almost hurting as they came into being. It felt like he had just struck another match, surrounded himself with fuel, and this time there'd be no interruptions.

"Amica?"

"There an echo in here?" He said dryly, unable to help jumping on the chance for an old classic. Apologetically lowering his optics, he released a quick bit of air from his vents in imitation of a cough. "Yeah, that, know what it is?"

"Sure, it's like... best friends, only way deeper, bound for life." You said, recalling it amongst the many Cybertronian terms you'd been learning these past few months. It had obviously had cultural implications and connections you just didn't have the experience to understand, but the importance of the practice had been abundantly clear from the moment you first heard of it. Chief among the things you'd been able to determine was that it carried no less weight than being a Conjunx, it was just a different kind of love.

He clicked his claws together in an imitation of an affirming snap. "That's the one. It's tough to explain to aliens, but that's the basic rundown, and there's a whole ceremony to it and everything. Did you know that?" He appreciated that you only shook your head and looked back to him for an explanation, it made it quite clear you were intent on listening as much as possible. "A bot has to ask the one who's less likely to ask, and they get to say yes or no during the ceremony. I'd imagine by now you've figured out I came here to ask you to be my Amica, start the ceremony and everything, only thing stopping me is I... just don't want to."

It was the first time he'd surprised you in a long time. There had been... well, you'd been fairly certain he was leading up to something else there, and had just been nervous. You had to repeat back what he'd said in a question for clarification. "You don't want to ask me?"

"What? No! Don't put words in the mouth I don't have!" He replied vigorously, taking a step closer to your berth and throwing up his arms in total consternation. Upon seeing your comforting near smile of reasurance, he drops his claws and holds them near his face, a gesture he typically only performs when anxious. Thoughts are beginning to run wild in his head, so he knows he'll have to wrap this up before they sidetrack him, or he'll never get it done. Bless your little fleshy fuel pump for wanting to comfort him, but there just isn't time for that. "What I'm trying to get across here, or say or whatever, is that I want to but I shouldn't..."

"Ah... why shouldn't you? Does me being a human make it... illegal?" You ask, finally getting an inkling as to what's going on. As usual, his burying of the lede means you're far less shocked than you should be now that he's actually getting to the point, but you want to use that to stay calm. Whirl has been a dear friend to you, as protective as could be from the moment he decided he liked you. The least you can do is be what he needs by letting him talk things out in a way that works for him, even if it feels so much easier to cut to the chase; you'd love to be his Amica no matter the hurdles.

"You and I both know that would only make it better. Illegal friendship? Sounds more like an endorsement than a deterrent to me." It's hard for him not to laugh at the very idea. If this was actually against some law? Oh, how very different things would be... Somehow he'd feel okay then, perhaps because this would just be another of his crazy ideas, and not something sentimental and completely irreconcilable with who he was. Previously upright antenna drooped low at the disappointment. "But... no, no such luck. It's not illegal for me to ask you, just stupid, because you're going to say no."

Suddenly so many things made sense, but in the shock of sadness that followed you couldn't help but speak, your own disappointment showing through. "I am?"

"Well of course you are! That little pink glob between your ears is smart enough to know better! If you were most saps, sure, you'd probably say yes because oooh friendship, but the fact that you're sensible enough to say no is exactly why I want to ask!" He replied, sounding emphatic instead of angry. Despite being a master at appearing mad for the sake of self defense, he can't bring himself to appear anything but... sad. Every part of him is wilting from the sadness that's clocking in early. Because you have to say no, that's just how this works, and his resignation to that fact is clear no matter how badly he wishes it wasn't true. "Believe me, I know what smart looks like. I know what sensible looks like. Most people have a terrible deficit of the two, but not... not you. That's what makes you worth asking, and also worth saying no. Weird, huh?"

Your heart is breaking, somewhat for you, but mostly for him. Did he really think he was unworthy of friendship? Of any kind of love? Clearly you were his best friend, but in the fog of self loathing clouding his vision, he's convinced himself that it has to end now that he truly feels he isn't alone. "Whirl..."

Venting in sharply, like a human sucking in a breath to hold off tears, he perks up and gestures a claw back over his shoulder. "Look, I'm just going to save us both some drama and skip to the part where you kick me out. Since I'm nice, I'll even pretend you're big enough to actually do it. I'll throw myself into the hallway and everything, really seal-"

"Whirl." You say softly, knowing that yelling won't help but desperate to keep him from leaving. It works, but he pretends to be interested in the floor, crouching like he's preemptively flinching away from a hit. It's not the first time you've seen him do this. Coming to understand the big bot had been more natural for you than most, but had still taken effort, and in all the trial and error you'd learned he just needed things phrased a little differently. Thus, you decided to give what you'd learned a final trial.

"Can I at least... actually get a chance to say no?"

It was just indirect enough to immediately catch his attention, but his wounded look remained unchanged, like he didn't dare hope.

"Any particular reason why?" He asked, tilting his helm as if you've piqued his interest with a daring and devilish scheme. There's a lot going on behind his optic, but you're unflinching as he levies it back on you, smiling to emphasize you have nothing to hide.

"It's... well, it's not really fair for you to decide something for me, is it? Even if you know what the answer will be, shouldn't I get the chance to make that choice myself in the moment?"

He clacks his claws together to imitate snapping fingers. "Damn it all, you're a clever little fleshy, I'll give you that. Appealing to my peerless sense of justice for self determination to get your way." The mask of neutrality is razor thin, and beneath it he's anything but calm. None of this is going the way he planned. Far from casting him out, you're encouraging him to go through with this, but why? You can't actually plan to say yes, so why all this fuss? It's not in you to set him up, but he can't bring himself to hope he has a chance at the impossible... So he just plays along like it's all a game, albeit a very sad one, and one he intends to play carelessly. "If you... I'll give you the way to say no and the way to say yes, okay? That way you'll... really mean it when you say no."

"I promise I'll mean it." You say, wishing so badly he'd believe you wanted his friendship. It'd be so much easier than coordinating with him to give you a chance to accept his Amica proposal. Yet you know his manner of processing can't be argued with, so instead you just keep going, praying he'll let you have a chance to show how much you care. "But I need to know how it all works."

"Well, I'll say some fancy words, show my spark, all that mushy stuff most folks love." He waves his claws about, as if to brush away the silliness of the ceremony right there. The idea of baring a spark surprises you, but you keep quiet, focused only on getting through to the part he's convinced himself won't happen. Even as he continues his pessimistic prediction is obvious in his tone. "Then, when I've said my piece and pause, you just say "I refuse" and it's all over, we don't have to talk again, I'll leave and..."

If you were close enough you'd have laid a reassuring hand on his shoulder, but thankfully your silent look of encouragement does the job, and he overlaps his wrists whilst looking away.

"But if you were going to say yes, hypothetically, then after my pause you just go quiet and... put your little digits on mine... Then repeat after me when I say "today, tomorrow and always" to wrap it up. But since that isn't happening, let's just get this over with, eh?"

It's the flattest one of his jokes has ever fallen. For all his skill keeping his feelings reigned in, even he can't prevent a little bit of intimidation slipping through. It's impossible not to be afraid, because he wants so badly to hope, but he knows what happens when he does... Still, he wants to at least get it over with, and he gathers himself just as you give your final encouragement with a smile.

"Lets."

Clearing his vents, it occurs to him that he's never been more self conscious than he is right now, which is an unfortunate feeling to prelude him baring his spark.

The soft glow fills the room as he shifts back his chest plating, revealing the orb of his "soul" as you'd once called it, and he internally admits that your quiet expression of awe gives him the boost he needs to start. "I bid you stand in the glow of my spark... so um, that you may feel the heat of my words and k-know them to be true."

It's arguably one of the only times he's ever stuttered, and while you don't react, he's never felt more foolish. Was it not enough for him to make a spectacle out of himself just by doing this? Did he really have to butcher the whole process too? Feeling dizzy, he forces his voicebox to try and start making words again. He's painfully aware of how ridiculous he looks; one eyed, mangled screw up trying to be sentimental... But darn it all, he made a commitment. Putting his claws beside his spark, he kept going into what he knew would be a bitter end.

"I invite you to receive my light and in doing so become my Amica Endura—from now until forever."

He doesn't realize he's at the end until he runs out of words. The fear and helplessness that follow are akin to the level he'd experience falling off a cliff with no flight to save him, and for an eternity he's left floundering in anticipation of the impact. This is supposed to be it, the moment you turn him away and rightfully go forward in life, better off for having left him. But you're quiet. Your words of dismissal aren't forthcoming, and your soft and somewhat sad little smile doesn't indicate that he should expect them. But why not?! Why won't you say them?! What could you possibly hope to gain by accepting?

You hardly dare to breathe as you wait for him to begin the next phase. The glow of his spark illuminates everything, allowing you to see the fear in every inch of his being, particularly his lone expressive optic. He doesn't want to believe you're saying yes, as much as he treasures you, he just can't believe you'd ever feel the same about him. But you do, and you try to communicate that with every fiber of your being. You want to be friends with him through anything that may come, and you pray that he can see the depth of your conviction in your eyes.

Something like a hiccup shakes his shoulders. You haven't refused him. It's been almost a minute, the light of his spark fluttering as the sheer power of his emotions coursed through it, namely his disbelief that any of this could be real. Something like relief but a million times stronger makes his vents hitch. He's still processing the turn of events when he remembers he has more to say.

"Ah... Y/N... for you... um... for your acceptance..." He croaks, trying to keep an accursed tear from leaving his optic by briefly tilting back his helm. You're similiarly affected, but you let yourself sniffle and shed a few tears as he approaches with his claws out to you. They're big enough that even a semblance of holding hands isn't really possible, but you grab the tip of each and squeeze regardless, knowing the sentiment is still quite clear. You're his friend, and you always will be, through thick and thin. Now he's finally starting to see that too.

He doesn't fully have a grasp on the fact that this is real, but he doesn't care about that as much as he should. You were his Amica Endura, his dearest friend, and you somehow liked him enough that all the baggage was worth it. With one of your tiny hands on each of his clawtips, he finished the ceremony. Each word felt light as a feather when he spoke it. "As you are to me, may I be to you—today, tomorrow, and always."

"Today, tomorrow, and always." You echo, meaning it with everything you are. There's no grand finale, but the emotion in his optic and quivering antenna is more impressive than any supernova. He doesn't seem to want to pull his claws away as he shifts his chest plating back into position, and you're happy to oblige, keeping a solid hold on his claws as if your tiny body is his lifeline.

"You didn't say no." He says as the glow of his spark disappears. It's a tone for a statement but he obviously wants it to be a question, and he only keeps it from being one because he's still too overwhelmed to ask that many yet.

You can't help but sniffle as you try to sound confident. "Of course I didn't."

"We're still friends." He says softly, closing his claws together so incredibly gently around your hands, letting the two of you be a little more connected as he marvels at his luck. Of all the squishies in the galaxy, this trip had led him to you, the one who made him happier than anything. Despite all sense you loved him, and he loves you back, and the two of you would get to keep on adventuring after this. You smile as you repeat your vow to make your dedication clear.

"Today, tomorrow, and always."

Those words strike a tender chord in his still sensitive spark, for you to believe them so confidently you'll repeat them with ease, and he's promoted to react on a whim.

"Can we hug?"

"Hug?"

"Is there an ech-" The rapid fire reflex of a joke fades out in the face of his genuine and unheard of desire for a bit of tender contact. Releasing your hands, he opens his arms to make his point clear, and is delighted when you start nodding even before he's done asking. "Yes, if you don't mind... okay? Okay."

It's more of a hug for you than him, your arms wrapping around his neck as you nuzzle against his helm to show affection, feeling him wrap as much of his gangly frame around you as possible without risking any kind of damage. While this may not be the first time he's initiated something like this, it's one of very few rare occasions, and thus you know this is special. You can feel how badly he wants the comfort through the ease he shows at your touch.

"You want to stay like this for a bit?" You ask gingerly, getting settled so you can stay comfortable for a few minutes cuddled up to him.

"Mhmm." He says softly, admitting to himself that hugs might actually be worth the fuss after all. Tiny hands reassuringly pat his shoulder, encouraging him to stay in place while he basks in this single perfect moment. He hadn't dared to hope you'd still be friends after this, but here you were, your little body holding and comforting him as if he wasn't several times your size. Funny thing, that fate, eh?

"Take your time."

"Y/N?" He whispers softly into the quiet, wanting to say one final thing before taking a few minutes to enjoy your company.

"Hm?"

There's a tiny pause before he holds you close with one final statement.

"Thanks."

#transformers #idw #maccadam #more than meets the eye #mtmte #lost light #tf #my writing #my asks #anon #requests #whirl #human reader #self insert #platonic #amica endura

127 notes · View notes

sadclearance · 4 years ago

Text

summer

pairing: suwa hiroto x male!reader x naruse kakeru from orange

summary: summer is here again.

category: fluff(?), angst(?), hurt/comfort(?) idk i suck at categorizing

warning(s): implied/referenced suicide

word count: 2013

key:

there's a flashback, but the start and end of it is signified with "*"

s/t - skin tone

summer is a time of warm sunny fun. the sky is clear, the air is hot--there's nothing stopping the group of old high school friends from gathering.

"do you think y/n's almost here?" naho asks, seeing as everyone from the group has finished with their brunch meals.

"if he is, he better have eaten beforehand. no way i'm staying any longer. i wanna get to the beach already!" azusa throws her head back exasperatedly.

"i'm sure he's on his way," saku says, voice steady but mind not confident in his own answer.

"y/n just texted me," hiroto sighs, and everyone already knows what it's about. and nobody's surprised.

"let me guess," azusa leans her face against her palm, "he's got another paper."

"yup," hiroto nods, revealing the screen of his phone to his friends.

"this is summer! who has papers during the summer?" azusa frowns.

"y/n always has papers during summers," saku notes. "maybe he's just working really hard."

"do you guys even know what he's studying?" hiroto asks.

"if you don't know, none of us would," takako says.

"what?"

"haven't you noticed?" azusa's eyes go wide. "are you dense?"

hiroto pouts, "that's not nice."

"y/n hasn't talked to any of us since high school," saku says.

"what? that can't be true. you're exaggerating," hiroto shakes his head.

"nope. not one text. not one reaction," azusa puts her pointer fingers together to create an 'x'.

"do you guys think he's holding up okay?" naho asks with a quiet voice. "i barely even saw him in high school after..."

and they all know what the next words were supposed to be.

but summer is a time for warm sunny fun, not a dark topic like this.

"let's go to the beach," azusa jumps from her seat and grabs her bag.

"yeah"s are heard throughout the group, and they all get up and follow her lead.

and the day is just the way it's supposed to be. the sun is bright, the air is hot, and the splashes of water that they playfully send each other's ways are cold.

"oh, you're so gonna get it!" azusa yells after saku dumps a bucket of water on her.

"hey! be careful," naho scolds. "you're gonna knock down my castle."

"sorry, sorry," azusa sends her a wink before going back to chase after saku.

it's fun like this. it's fun being with his high school friends. so fun that it makes hiroto miss high school.

but missing high school came with reminiscing memories of high school. memories that weren't always so fun.

and now hiroto feels like he can't move his fingers. his eyes can't focus on anything, and his view of the beautiful blue water is blurry. he wants to clear his mind, but he's trapped.

his heady is foggy, yet the past moments whizzing around inside his brain is painfully apparent.

*he doesn't feel the cool breeze of the ocean anymore. he feels the warm air of the blazing fire that was lit in y/n's tiny backyard. probably a fire hazard, but who could think about that when his best friends were smiling so big?

a black-haired boy that usually wears such a painful expression is now laughing heartily alongside the owner of the small place, letting his arms rest around his waist.

and warm s/t hands are pulling hiroto towards them.

"c'mon! join the party!"

there's so much laughter and warmth, even on the cold winter night.

hiroto thinks that it's the best night of his life.

the same hands that pulled him closer are now pointing at both sides of his cheeks.

the brunette and the raven laugh more before they decide to say "fuck it" and give into a little peck on the cheek.

but right before lips meet cheeks, y/n pulls his face away, and the lips are pressed against each other.

a cheery beautiful laugh resounds throughout the cold air as grey and brown eyes stare into each other, wide with realization.

when they pull away, hiroto expects kakeru's face to twist in disgust, but it doesn't. there's a small smile playing on his lips instead.

"your loss, y/n. kakeru's lips are sweet," hiroto playfully sticks out his tongue.

"then i guess i should get a taste for myself," y/n grins like a goof.

this view is so pretty and hiroto would never trade it for anything.

but then suddenly, kakeru's feet are off the ground, and y/n's body crumbles because kakeru is--*

"what--" hiroto gasps when cold water soaks him from head to toe.

"you were off in your own little dream world," takako says, putting the bucket down on the coarse sand.

"stop thinking so hard. that's never been a strong point for you," saku jokes before getting splashed by azusa.

"finally got you!" azusa celebrates, prancing around the low water in glee.

"you're on, takako!" hiroto says with a new burst of energy. he doesn't want to bring down the mood.

"it wasn't a challenge, but if you really wanna lose..." takako grins.

he's tired by the end of the day. takako was right. he lost.

"meet up at five for the festival tomorrow?" hiroto asks before parting ways.

"yup!" azusa nods aggressively.

"keep that up and you're gonna break your neck," saku flicks her head with his pointer finger.

"yeah," takako laughs.

"should we text y/n about tomorrow's plans?" naho asks hesitantly.

"i'll let him know," hiroto says after no one responds.

"you will?" naho asks with hopeful eyes.

"how could i ever say no to you?" hiroto ruffles her hair, trying to make the air less tense.

"don't be late tomorrow!" azusa yells at the group before going her own way.

the walk back to his house is quiet. he doesn't want to be alone right now. his mind is too much to handle alone, and he just wants something to distract him from these memories forever.

before he knows it, his feet have carried him to the l/n family house's door. the house that had been empty since y/n left for college.

he wonders if y/n's even there. probably not, considering how y/n's working on the paper for his project.

but he still needs time to work up the courage to ring the doorbell.

the simple task of lifting his finger and pressing the button takes some time and way more effort than it should, but he eventually gets it done.

"you in?" hiroto asks after a while. he knows his voice is weak, and that even if y/n was home, he wouldn't have been able to hear, but he can't find it in himself to raise his voice. his energy is suddenly drained, and he feels like he can barely keep himself up straight.

he leans against the door for support. "please."

he feels like a drunk, but he hasn't had anything to drink. it's pathetic and sad and ugly. all sides of him that he doesn't want to show anyone.

but he desperately wants to see y/n.

so, he continues.

"please, y/n. open the door," hiroto weakly knocks against the door.

he doesn't know how long he's been there, but he knows he needs to pick himself up and get to his own place.

before he leaves, holding the naive hope that y/n's on the other side of the door, he says, "we're gonna go to the festival tomorrow at five... it'd be nice if you came. i'll wait for you by the park that ka--..." this part is hard. he has to harshly swallow down the lump in his throat. "that we used to hang out at."

he couldn't keep his promise.

he had been waiting since four, but it was half-past five. he couldn't keep his friends waiting any longer.

"come on, hiroto," naho says with a painfully feigned smile. "it's okay."

"yeah," azusa tries to help. "we'll just catch him next time."

"we have all week to see him," saku eventually just grabs hiroto's arm and pulls him with them.

"okay, okay," hiroto forces out a laugh. "i can walk on my own. let's get a snack."

naho's as pretty in that kimono as she was back in high school, but hiroto can't find it in himself to be interested. he realizes that the things that used to excite him don't mean anything to him anymore.

it makes him feel hollow inside. will he feel like this when--if he sees y/n?

the thought haunts him for the rest of their time walking together, looking at what the different stalls and booths had to offer.

he doesn't remember when, but at some point, the sky had turned dark. he's sure the fireworks will start any time now.

"let's find a nice spot!" azusa says excitedly.

"you guys go ahead," hiroto says, pulling away from the group. "i need to go to the bathroom."

"hurry back! or you're gonna miss it!" naho says with a certain desperation in her voice, and hiroto knows it's because she can't afford to lose another friend.

"don't worry," hiroto reassures with a little smile. "i'll be back."

he knows it's silly, but he wants to go back to the park. it's stupid and illogical to even hope for y/n to be there because hiroto's not even sure if y/n was in the house when he said those desperate words.

but hiroto can't help but yearn.

he makes it to the park, and he sees a figure sitting on a bench--their bench.

it could be a random stranger that just happened to coincidentally sit there, or it could--

"y/n..." hiroto says softly when he gets close enough to confirm the identity of this person.

"hiroto..." y/n greets back. he's in casual clothes, nothing like what people normally wear to a festival. it's clear that this wasn't a thought out idea.

he hesitantly takes a seat next to y/n, leaving more space than necessary between them.

"i didn't know you were in town," hiroto says because as much as he's been longing for this moment, he doesn't know how to continue.

"then why did you come last night?" y/n doesn't look up.

"i..." how's he supposed to answer a question that he himself doesn't know the answer to? "i was hopeful."

the silence between them is unbearable, and hiroto wishes that seeing his high school best friend wasn't this awkward. it used to be so easy to talk to each other. why was it like this now?

"do you come back often?" hiroto asks.

"no. i've been too busy with stuff at school."

"you can't lie to me."

"then why ask?" it comes out harsher than y/n meant it to. "sorry..."

hiroto waits it out this time, and it works.

"i... i come back every summer," y/n lifts his head, but not to face hiroto's. his gaze passes the brunette and goes straight for the skies above.

there's tears building up in his eyes, and he tries to blink them away as fast as he can, but hiroto's already seen them.

he tries to think of his next words very carefully, but saku was right. thinking really hasn't ever been his strong point.

so he instinctively grabs y/n's shaking hand with his own and pulls him into an embrace.

"hey, y/n..." hiroto steadies his voice. "you're still reliving that summer alone, over and over again, aren't you?"

the only response he gets is trembling arms around his waist.

"as long as we live, summer will continue to come around..." hiroto tightens his embrace and hopes that his words are the right ones. "but the same summer will never come again."

"i miss him, hiroto," y/n chokes on a sob.

"i know. i miss him, too," hiroto buries his face in y/n's shoulder.

"and i missed you," y/n cries.

"i missed you more," hiroto whispers. "i love you."

he wonders if y/n could hear him over the loud popping of the fireworks.

but more than that, he wonders if this summer, they can finally start anew, as kakeru would want summer to be a time of warm sunny fun.

❥๑━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━๑❥

a/n;

messy half-vent fic. idek if it makes sense. inspired from a manga that i forgot the name of but it was this younger guy who was chasing after an older guy, and the older guy had a deceased boyfriend that died in a car crash in the summer.

#hiroto suwa x male reader #kakeru naruse x male reader #kakeru naruse #hiroto suwa #takako chino #saku hagita #azusa murasaka #naho takamiya #orange anime #orange #orange takano ichigo #x male reader #male reader insert #mlm #anime x male reader

75 notes · View notes

siodium · 3 years ago

Photo

ASKD;AKSL MY 天官赐福 MANHUA ARRIVED SAFELY

the day it got delivered i went to check the mailbox in the morning before work and i noticed it was full so i asked my family to go open it up hoping that whatever’s filling up the mailbox was my manhua

came back from work and nope no parcel for me :/ well that’s fine... i had asked the GO host to let me know when she’d mailed it out but she didn’t say anything so i guess it’s still with her,,, right??

wrong!! later in the evening it was in the mailbox!! my dad said if i didn’t ask him to check the mailbox in the morning and dig out whatever’s inside then the mailman might not have been able to fit my manhua parcel inside the mailbox and if they dump it at my doorstep and it gets lost or soaked in this rainy weather i’m gonna be mad >:(

tldr my ocd mailbox-checking tendencies may have saved my parcel

so for context after watching mdzs i started getting tgcf recommendations on youtube but i put it off bc idk?? it looked interesting but i wasn’t looking to start anything that time

then i became a netflix parasite and!! tgcf was just added to netflix so i thought eyyy why not start now while the host has yet to boot me

bruH i liked the donghua sO MUCH i went to find the eng translation of the novel so i could continue the rest of the story

the novel had over 300 chapters but i was so invested in the Plot and the Ship i would read it whenever i could so i finished it in two weeks

book gave me so much feels 10/10 i haven’t read something so engrossing that made me not want to put it down ever since AI the somnium files

i actually have a tiny bit of regret picking one of the best danmei novels to start with bc now it’s hard to find anything that can compare???

and that’s the story of how i became addicted to danmei

i was not expecting this book to be such a chonker O: it’s noticeably bigger and a lot heavier than your average japanese manga

xie lian looking gorgeous on the cover sasuga STAREMBER

i joined the bilibili GO so my set came with a shikishi, pin badge, sticker sheet and bookmark~ i heard the pin badge would only be included for the first 40k orders or something like that and they sold out really fast so i wasn’t expecting to get it but it’s a pleasant surprise!!

the sticker sheet was the only extra thing i wanted (luckily it came with all orders) askdjaldj look at all the chibis

wind master!!!! the goodest boi!! must protect

some peeks of the inside!!

yes it’s all in chinese

can i read???? no... but i’m trying my best

the translated chapters are up on the bilibili site/app for free but i just wanted a physical copy bc i’m a simp for starember’s art

bride xie lian... nice

the first volume ends right after the ghost bridegroom arc which means hua cheng barely got any screen time lmao rip

was kinda hoping that the first volume would cover a little bit of the banyue arc but it seems like they a publishing volumes based on the online publication... which means we’ll get four?? volumes of banyue arc gg

idk how to feel about that but at least there’s more hualian moments

the gambling den/ghost city arc tho!!! that’s the one i’m really looking forward to

due to space constraints i told myself to pick between the chinese physical manhua and the english physical novel

i pick the nice arts as you already know but recently when i went to kinokuniya i saw the taiwan novels?? the cover art was so beautiful?? and since the english novels will be using the same cover art... by extension they’d also turn out beautiful... so now i’m tempted

but i already have the digital copy of the entire novel tho and that helps to conserve space (and money) hmm,,

#log #today's the last day of 2021 and it's been raining the whole day #it's nice and cooling but kinda moody #hopefully things get better next year so i can be Freed

3 notes · View notes

hitsuackerman · 4 years ago

Text

What in the World? (Akaashi Keiji x Reader) pt.4

Part 4 of WINTW? :D Enjoy!

Akaashi’s lineup: @alluring-akaashi @oikawalmart-hq @extrasugafree @bbykiyoomi @apricotjihyo @simpformiya @colorseeingchick @something-that-idk

links: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 5

“How is she?” Todoroki asked as he witnessed the scene before him.

None of them were expecting your quirk to go rampant for a few seconds. Being kept under surveillance, it was a miracle that UA signed the papers to let Recovery Girl be in charge. With your quirk’s sudden outburst, a good portion of her office was now upside down. The closest bed to yours was flipped over, the machine monitoring your vital signs now rested on the floor, and the window separating you from the rest now torn into shreds.

“Her vitals are still normal.” Recovery Girl said as she fixed the machine. Making sure that everything was as it was, she sighed and stared at your sleeping body. In all her years as a nurse, this would have to be the first time she would experience this. “Todoroki-san. Your father’s lab sent me some EEG results. I went over them a few hours ago.”

Todoroki nodded. His fist slowly balling.

“It perplexes me.” She pointed her index at you. “Her brain activity shows no sign of being in a commative state. In fact, it’s the opposite. The results told me that her brain is as active as ever.”

“Then why is she sleeping?” Bakugo asked. All this time he had been quietly observing. “If this extra’s brain is acting up, why the hell isn’t she responding?”

“I still have to run a few tests. And maybe call a few colleagues. It’s only been the second day, with a quirk like hers, it may be normal for her body to remain in a constant state of consciousness.”

Deku was about to speak up till he saw the faint glow of yellow on your palms once more. Everyone in the room prepared and distanced themselves from your sleeping body but nothing extreme happened. Staring at how the glow was steady and disappeared after a few seconds, collective hums and tiny gasps filled the room. With nothing happening next, Recovery Girl motioned for the three boys to leave.

Inside the classroom, everyone was waiting for the doors to slide open. When it did, everyone began bombarding them with questions till Bakugo finally yelled at them to shut their mouths. Commanding Todoroki to tell them, the half and half boy began.

“Recovery Girl said that (y/n)’s brain doesn’t show signs of being in a coma.”

“The girl’s quirk went haywire in the clinic. Either she’s sleep fighting or her quirk is getting out of control. You two were handed a mission, right? What exactly happened half and half? You hidin’ somethin’ or shit?”

“Kacchan, Todoroki-kun already explained what happened.” Deku tried to calm down the angry pomeranian. It worked but he received a snarl. Looking at Todoroki, Deku asked. “You’ve known her longest, do you think she’ll be okay?”

“She was in pain when I last saw her conscious. It angers me that there’s nothing much I can do but to hope that she’ll recover.”

Meanwhile, in another dimension, you were now preparing the gym with Yukie and Kaori. Dragging the cart out, you had been assigned to take care of the volleyballs. Pumping and making sure that there was enough air in them, you felt glad for the mini work out. It had been too long since you last worked out and even this amount was barely enough to maintain your body.

Asking a member, he hesitantly agreed into letting you become the new ball boy.

“(y/n)-chan? You sure you wanna be incharge of the balls?” Konoha asked.

“Yeah. There’s more than enough managers and it would be good exercise for me.” It was a shocker that Konoha even talked to you. Among the team, he was one of the few people you didn’t bother to research about. All you knew was he could cheer Bokuto up and that was that. Satisfied with your reply, you watched as he excused himself and walked back to begin his warm up.

At the end of the day, your body was far from sore. Not even an increase in your heart rate. Though, you did sweat but only due to the heat the gym radiated. Now that you were inside the girl’s locker room, you stretched your limbs only to be left unsatisfied.

“You moved and caught the balls like there was no tomorrow yet you barely broke a sweat.” Kaori commented as she took her shirt off. Yukie chimed in and agreed with the statement.

“I used to work out a lot back in Musutafu.” Taking your shirt off, the two girls gasped at the sight of your toned body. It had only dawned you that this would be the first time you were changing with them. You always made it a habit to enter the gym earlier than the others.

“Were you in a gang? Why do you have a lot of scratches on your body, (y/n)?” Yukie took a step closer and feasted on all your small battle scars.

Mentally cursing that you did not think this moment through, you chewed on your inner cheek and tried to think of an explanation.

“I think it’s pretty obvious that I’m a clutz, Yukie-san.”

“A big one at that.” She pointed to a particular one. The most painful one of them all. Running from your shoulder to the tip of your breastbone, the memory of Toga digging her knife across your skin made you shudder. Seeing how you shuddered, Yukie felt guilt for intruding such personal space.

“It’s fine, Yukie-san~ No need to apologize.” You stopped her before she could speak. “Those were just… tough times ya know? But, this doesn’t hurt or even affect me that much anymore.”

“Well, you better get dressed quickly,” Kaori commented as she giggled. “Akaashi-san just sent you a message saying he’s waiting by the gate.”

Changing quickly, you could feel the stares behind you.

“Nothing is going on, okay? We’re just neighbors.” You pouted with your eyebrows furrowing.

“So you mean to say, you have the strength to walk past his beautiful face?”

“Yes, Kaori-san.” You replied with a deadpan voice. Yes, you admired him during the first day here in this dimension but that was it.

“And that none of those athletic boys caught your attention?”

“None at all.” Shrug.

The two girls shared a quiet giggle. Squinting your eyes, you stared at them till they waved you off and told you to have fun on your walk back home with the setter. Now that you were walking towards the gate, you checked up on your quirk once more. The pulling sensation was a little stronger, the glow a little brighter, but no significant changes. When you saw Akaashi leaning on the wall, his gunmetal blue eyes looked silver under the moonlit night.

“Shall we?”

“Yeah.”

The walk began and it was wrapped in silence once more. But, this time, the silence was comfortable. It gave you enough time to gather your thoughts. Every now and then, you would ask a school related question to the setter and immediately a response was given. Passing by a cafe, your eyes were glued to the (favorite pastry) being showcased. On record time, your stomach sang and your cheeks turned red.

“You hungry?” Akaashi asked as he stared at the (favorite pastry). “I don’t mind eating dinner out. The food this cafe offers is pretty tasty.”

“Can we?” A wide grin formed on the corners of your mouth. When he nodded his head, you grabbed on to his hand and dragged him inside the cafe. The scent of brewed coffee accompanied by the soothing melodies of soft jazz reminded you of Kiri and Bakugo’s study sessions.

Bringing him to the counter, Akaashi’s eyes focused on both your hands. There was no spark now, but this time a small pulling sensation took its place. Judging that it might have been the effects of practice he brushed it off and enjoyed the warmth your hold had to offer.

“I’ll have pasta and a slice of that (favorite pastry) please!” The giddiness in your voice made the cashier smile.”What about you, Akaashi-san?”

“Caesar salad and a pork chop.”

Offering to pay for the food, you let go of his hand and fished out your pocket. It wasn’t too expensive and the money your o-mother gave you was slowly piling up. Getting the number, you pointed to a small booth that had enough privacy the two of you would appreciate.

“Do you eat here a lot, Akaashi-san?”

“Not quite.” The way he sat down was very proper compared to yours. Though he didn’t really mind. “I do like their latte’s here. What about you, Firecracker?”

“Firecracker?” You raised a brow and your palms began to sweat.

“Have you eaten here before?”

“Nope. This would have to be my first time.” Your eyes scanned the decoration. It was homey and rustic. The lights above you looked as if the designer had a lot of glass bottles at home. “You’re pretty good at dealing with Bokuto-san’s personality.”

“Barely. I just grew up with him.”

“Were you in the volleyball club in middle school?”

“Yeah.” He began to play with his fingers. “But my teammates weren’t as dedicated. What about you?”

“Well, I didn’t join any club.” You placed your elbow on the table and rested your chin on your palm. Your stare glued to the boy sitting across you. “But I did like aiding the support department from time to time. They built some pretty interesting gears that helped me and my friends cope with the curriculum.”

“Gears?” The look of confusion was amusing. It was subtle but clear.

“Yeah.” You smirked. “UA was pretty brutal when it came to subjects. Being in 1-A was interesting and the smallest trip caused a lot of chaos. It was fun, scared the shit out of us, but the experience was worth it.”

“You’re talking as if you have special abilities.” His eyebrow was the one raised now. The playful glimmer in your eyes evident.

“Are you saying I’m not special, Akaashi-san?”

“I never implied that, (l/n)-san.”

The both of you stared each other down for a while. Being with Akaashi in a private booth was a different experience. His extra shirt was a little loose on him, thus hiding his well formed shoulders. A little sad, you had to admit. Being given the opportunity to stare at his face, you had to give him praise. He really was gorgeous despite looking a tad tired from the heinous practice.

“I’m kidding. Ya got me.” You pulled out a tissue and threw it on the table. A white flag, so to speak. “I wasn’t into sports. I was mostly in the background and focused on my studies. Boring right?”

“Far from it.” The corner of his lip curled up for the slightest bit. That small smile made your tummy feel weird and tingly.

“Indeed. I’m far from boring.” You winked. “I’m probably the most interesting person here in this dimension called Tokyo.”

“You’re rubbing ass now.”

“So the very proper and dainty Akaashi Keiji knows how to swear?” You feigned surprise and couldn’t help but laugh a bit at the words he had just said.

“Ass is not a swear word, (l/n) (y/n).”

“You’re right. It’s something you're blessed with.” Fuck. You got carried away. Biting your tongue and clearing your throat, the food finally arrived. Hopefully he’d let it slip and just enjoy the meal. “ANYWAY~ Thanks for letting me drag you in here.”

“My pleasure.”

The meal was pleasant and the embarrassment of complimenting his ass forgotten. Yet, the feeling of finally telling someone about a few things back home was a huge weight off your shoulders. Having to bottle up so much knowledge that you’re a complete stranger in this world was straining.

Akaashi noticed it too. How your shoulders relaxed and your features as well indicated that you had just taken a load off your problems. He couldn’t pinpoint what it was but he was pretty sure that there was more to what you had just told him. Not to mention your choice of words were far from being carefully selected, almost as if it was natural to you. Swallowing his thoughts, he continued savoring the food and the enigma before him.

Now standing on the street, in the middle of your houses, you stared at the gap between the two buildings. 5 meters was your estimated distance. Not too far and not too close, a pretty standard distance based on the houses in the neighborhood.

“Thanks for walking me home, Akaashi-san.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, (l/n)-san.”

“Ya know, we might as well drop the honorifics. Neighbors, same year, same team.” You were never one to like formalities anyway. “But, I’m cool with keeping it tho.”

“In that case, I can agree with your proposal.” Akaashi now walked towards his side of the area. With his back facing you, he glanced over his shoulder and bowed. “Goodnight, Firecracker.”

Firecracker. That was more of a Bakugo thing, if you were to be honest.

But, coming from his mouth?

You were more than willing to let him call you that.

- - - - -

so did ya’ll like this chapter? we now have a picture as to how our BNHA friends are doing~ Akaashi is still accepting in his line up :) comment if youd like to be a part of it!

#akaashi x reader #akaashi keiji x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuxbnha

65 notes · View notes

writingtoforgetreality · 5 years ago

Text

Just this one time (Steve Rogers x Reader - College!AU)

Request: Hey love I see that you are taking requests and I’m just in desperate need of a college au Steve Rogers moment lmaoo💀 maybe they’re best friends and there’s like this party that’s coming up and she dresses to the nines and was planning to confess her feelings there but sees him with another girl but happy ending and lots of fluff please | Or maybe a steve Rogers fic based on the song are you bored yet by wallows (by @jazzzhargrove), [Marvel-Masterlist]

Summary: Steve & you have been roommates for two years now. You were best friends even though you have started to develop a crush on him. One day, Steve asks you to accompany him to a party of one of your friends. You agree, planning on confessing your feelings for him. At the party, a bad surprise awaits you…

Words: 4,310

Warnings: slow burn? (idk man, I didn’t mean for it to be this long), lack of experience when it comes to college (pls don’t blame me), Steve going from angel to devil to angel, a bit of angst, happy ending (I swear)

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

College. You imagine something when you hear this, am I right? Like, the cliché teenage movies with not enough budget that make you think you know what college is like. You were thinking the exact same not too long ago. Now you were here & nope, it was nothing like you ever imagined.

A bit over 2 years ago, you graduated from high school. Finally. You hated that place. The only reason you continued going there was because you wanted to get a well paid job in the future. Yeah, it was a hell ride but you made it out alive. Time to focus on college.

The first real problem had begun before your actual classes had started. Living far away from college meant that you had to live somewhere on the campus. You looked at the rent & almost shitted yourself. There was no way you could pay for this on your own. Your parents already made sure to pay your college tuitions so you could not ask them for more. So you decided to use your twitter account for something important for once. You sent out a tweet, asking if anyone would be interested in sharing an apartment near your college, preferably someone who studied there as well. Not too long after that you got a private message from the account @steve_rogers. He said that he was interested in moving in with you since he could not afford an apartment himself. Before you wrote him back, though, you checked out his account, making sure it was not a kidnapper or someone like that. His tweets seemed truthfully & he was of equal age. Perfect, right? You replied with an address of a coffeeshop near the campus & told him to meet you there. Two days later, you guys were sitting there, drinking a coffee & planning everything out. You were happy that he really was a Steve Rogers who would be studying at a college & not a…50-year old creep. What was even better was that this Steve was handsome as hell & had the personality of an angel. You also found out that he would be studying the same thing as you, Fine Art. He would be a good roommate. The two of you exchanged numbers before saying goodbye so you could stay in contact & ask if more questions appeared. You were happy. You found someone trustworthy who would share an apartment with you. That meant that both, Steve & you, had enough money to pay for the rent & to have leisure, too. You could not wait to move in & start your college-journey.

A month later, your parents rented you a truck to move all of your stuff into your new apartment. You were so excited. Not only for your new home but also because you would be meeting Steve again. Ever since the coffeeshop, the two of you had been texting & calling each other all the time. At first, it was simply because of your apartment but after some time, you just started talking casually & became fast friends. Steve told you he was already at your new home & told you you would love it. The drive seemed to last forever but eventually, you arrived. Steve was already waiting for you outside, wanting to help you with all of your boxes. You got out of your car, sprinted towards him & hugged him like you had known him forever. Weird…you had never had such a connection with someone. This was the start of a great friendship, you were sure.

*Present Day*

What's wrong? You've been asking but I don't have an answer How come? I'm still thinking, let's pretend to fall asleep now When we get old, will we regret this? Too young to think about all that shit And stallin' only goes so far when you've got a head start

“(Y/N)?“ Steve screamed from the bathroom. He always did that. “You know you can still ask me when you finish showering, yeah?“ you screamed back. “That’s not as much fun, though.“ he answered. You shook your head & let out a low chuckle.

A few minutes later, Steve exited the bathroom, wearing just a white towel which hung low on his hips. He did that so casually, like it was the most normal thing on earth. You wished he would not have this effect on you. When did you catch feelings for him? You were not sure. All you knew was that he acted like the best friend you had always craved. Why did you have a crush on him? You would never make a move though, not wanting to ruin your friendship. He did not like you that way, you were certain. He was just nice, that was his personality. He treated everyone like that.

“(Y/N)?“ Steve asked again. “Yeah, Steve, I heard you the first time.“ you said, trying to look at his face ,& not to his white towel, which was incredibly hard at that moment. Staring would make everything even weirder. “Trevor is having this big party tonight & he asked me to come.“ Steve looked into your (Y/E) eyes. Why did he tell you? It was not like you attended parties that often. He was someone who enjoyed these “college activities“ but you always got overwhelmed with big crowds. Steve knew this though. Usually, whenever someone had asked him to come to a party & you had told him you did not want to go, then he had always stayed with you at your room.

'Cause we could stay at home and watch the sunset But I can't help from asking, "Are you bored yet?" And if you're feeling lonely you should tell me Before this ends up as another memory Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie? Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie?

“Um…okay? And?“ confusion was written all over your face. What was his intention? The two of you made plans earlier, wanting to stay in to study together. “Well, I wanted to ask you if you wanna accompany me. Trevor would be fine with it, I’m sure.“ he scratched his neck, knowing damn well that you never were in a party mood. “Are you serious? I thought we’d study tonight? We have very important exams coming up, y’know.“ you tried reasoning. “I know, I know & I’m sorry but I canceled Trever so many times & he insists on me coming.“ Steve came a little closer, your eyes still focused on his. “Okay, then go? I’m not gonna force you to stay with me. Go & have some fun, we’ll study on another day.“ you tried to keep up your strong voice but deep down you were kind of disappointed. You were looking forward to tonight. Your late night study sessions always ended with extremely serious conversations & then with popcorn & a movie. “Nah…um, I actually want you to go with me. I really don’t wanna show up alone. Come on, please? Just this one time, I swear!“ he pleaded. Steve said he did not want to show up alone but in reality he just wanted to spend time with you & wanted to show you off. You guys were not a thing yet but every person saw that you were pretty close & assumed that you soon would be dating. Maybe you were just too oblivious to see it. “I haven’t been to a party in forever. I don’t even know if I have the right clothes. I don’t wanna look like an outsider.“ “You always look perfect, though.“ the second he said this, he started blushing. You did not realize & he continued. “I’m sure you’ll do just fine. Besides, I’m not gonna leave you there alone. We’re gonna stay together & if you wanna go back to our apartment, then I’m gonna go with you.“ you smiled at his words. Did he even know that his words affected you that way? Maybe he was being sincere & you were the only person who heard him say such cute words. On the other hand…was this not just his personality?

You agreed on accompanying Steve but only because of one reason. Tonight was finally the time you would confess your feelings for him. The party was in a few hours & Steve decided he would go back to the library for a while to start studying. He needed a bit more time to get everything into his head than you. “See ya!“ you screamed at Steve while he left your apartment. Enough time to make yourself look presentable for tonight. You wanted to impress him, to let him know you were this dressed up only because of him. Still, you could not exaggerate. Staying true to yourself was one of your priorities but you got this.

At first, you took a long shower, washing your hair. Stepping out, you dried yourself off with a towel. For now, you stripped over one of Steve’s shirts. Sometimes, when he was not looking, you would go to his dresser & grab some shirts. He never cared too much, saying they looked better on you anyway. After the bathroom, you went over to your bedroom. Back then, Steve let you grab the bigger room because he knew how much you loved a lot of space. You sat down at your white dressing table. It was a mess, as always. You put makeup on every single day, there was no need for you to move the stuff back to its place. This way, you could find the needed products faster. You wanted to impress Steve, yeah, but you never went crazy with your makeup so you would do a tiny bit more than your daily look. It took you longer than usual, wanting to make everything as perfect as possible. In your eyes you succeeded. For your hair, you decided on (fav/hairstyle). The mirror showed your reflection & for once you were content with what you saw. Steve had come back by now but he did not want to bother you in your room. He simply went back to his own bedroom, deciding it would be time to get ready for the party himself. Now, you were standing in front of your closet, unsure of what you wanted to pick. You searched through everything but nothing seemed to fit. Great, what would you do now? Shortly before you wanted to give up & tell Steve you could not go, your eyes skimmed over a black dress at the back of your closet. You almost forgot about this one. Your hand grabbed the hanger & examined the dress. It was short but not too short. You had worn it once, when your mom went shopping with you & kind of forced you to try it on. She bought it for you, saying it would come in handy one day. Bless her, she was right. You stripped the black fabric on & went over to your floor-length mirror. The dress hugged your figure perfectly. You almost could not believe that the person in the mirror was you. A smile spread across your face. Tonight was your night.

“Sweetheart? It’s time. Trevor called me. He said there are already a bunch of people. Are you ready?“ Steve knocked at your door. He was not sure if he could come in or not so he stayed outside. He did not want to walk in on you changing or something. “A second!“ Steve heard your hurried steps. You grabbed your black shoes, put them on & walked over. Then you opened the door & he was shocked. He had seen you in dresses & all but this time? This felt different. You saw his stare & smiled at the floor, suddenly not sure if you looked good anymore. Steve answered your question before you could say anything. “Wow…You look…You look gorgeous. I mean, you always do but this, um, you know I-“ he stuttered. Did you just make him embarrassed? To stop him, you simply answered. “Thanks. You don’t look too bad yourself.“ you smirked & looked him up & down. He was wearing a dark blue sweatshirt, a pair of jeans & his go-to black vans. How did he look this good while literally wearing the most basic clothes on earth? “Ma’am?“ he faked an accent, holding out a hand for you to grab. You laughed at him, took his hand & let him lead you to his car. Trevor’s party was at his house, his parents were away on a business trip. Arriving at Steve’s car, he opened your door because, duh, he is a gentleman. All you could do was smile at him. The butterflies got more & more present. Stupid, stupid crush. You did not even noticed that Steve got in the car too, starting it & driving away. He was never the biggest fan alcohol & neither were you so you trusted him with driving. Shortly after, you came to a stop in front of a big house. Even though Trevor & you had been friends for some time now, you had never been to his home. You were impressed. Steve helped you out of the car but he did not stop holding your hand. He was the cutest. This had to mean something, right? As the two of you walked in, hand in hand, you could already smell the alcohol from everywhere. Looking around, you saw many people already being too drunk to realize a thing. It was barely 10 pm. That was one reason why you did not like parties. There were so many people, you were glad Steve was still holding your hand, otherwise you would have lost him. Where he was going? You did not know. Though he turned around, screaming something at you, you could not hear anything. The music was blasting way too loud. People really liked that? Suddenly you came to a stop. The music was a bit quieter, thank god, & Steve talked to someone. You looked over to find Trevor. As soon as he saw you, he took you in for a hug. Yeah, he had been drinking. He was not someone who would hug you. Nevermind, you still hugged him back. Trevor said how happy he was that you both could make it & that you should feel like home. Feeling like home? That was a bit hard with this crowd around but you tried. You looked over your shoulder for a second, thinking you heard someone say your name. Apparently you misheard someone because nobody was behind you. Turning back, Trevor was gone. Where did he go? It did not matter. At least you had Steve next to you still. You would literally die without him here.

“Hey, let’s head outside, yeah? Trevor said it’s more fun out there.“ Steve looked at you, letting go of your hand. Suddenly you felt cold. Why did he let go? “Um…sure.“ you followed him outside, making sure not to lose him. You were not sure anymore. Did he like you more than a friend? Maybe you were too embarrassing to show around at a party. He said he wanted you to come, right? You should not stress about it too much. Arriving outside, you could feel a cold breeze hitting your skin. It was quite nice though, fresh air. You could not help but feel a bit lost, even next to Steve. You went to grab his hand again, wanting to feel his comfort but as soon as your fingertips touched him he moved his hand into his pocket, avoiding your gaze. Was that a coincidence? Or did he not want to hold your hand anymore? You were confused & you frowned. Maybe tonight was not your night after all. You were lost in thought until someone bumped into you. “Ssssorry.“ a drunk male said, well…tried to, at least. You were glad he did not have a drink he spilled over you. Your dress, your look in general, was still intact. “No problem.“ you hoped he would just leave again. You definitely were not in the mood for this. As soon as you turned around to tell Steve you would like to leave you were shocked to not find him next to you anymore. Where was he? He promised you to stay with you the entire time. Great. Just great. Looking around, you tried finding him which was a bit hard because of the large crowd. He was not outside. Walking back inside, you tried finding someone you knew from your classes but without success. Trevor was not in sight either. You started panicking. Steve knew how much you despised this.

Feels like I've known you my whole life I can see right through your lies I don't know where we're going But I'd like to be by your side If you could tell me how you're feeling Maybe we'd get through this undefeated Holding on for so long

You had been looking for him for 30 minutes now. He did not pick up his phone & neither did he answer your texts. Deciding you would give it one more try, you started wandering around inside the house yet again. At the corner of your eye you saw a broad figure, a dark blue sweatshirt. Finally, you thought. You took a closer look. No, this could not be. This was Steve, locking lips with some bitch. Was he serious? Tears started welling up in your eyes. He wandered off to kiss a random girl? You thought you knew him well but apparently you were wrong. Steve tried fighting off the girl who just came at him & started kissing him. What the fuck? She obviously never heard of consent. He opened his eyes to push her away only to find you a few feet away from him, obviously upset. He could see your tears. No, no, no. By the time he managed to push the girl off & told her it was completely dumb what she just did because she was obviously drunk, you were already out of sight. Fuck, he lost you. Of course it looked like he was kissing her. He needed to explain himself but he could not find you anywhere. Your phone was not on, making it impossible for him to reach you. After seeing Steve kissing this girl, you started running. You did not want to cry but you were so angry at him & yourself. He saw you as a friend, that was it. Why could you not see this before? Before you even knew where your feet dragged you, you were stood in front of your apartment door. Did you just run the entire way back home? You were tired, you wanted nothing more than to take off your makeup & that stupid dress. Your bed was waiting for you. After ridding yourself from your shoes, makeup & dress, you threw on your pajama. You usually wore Steve’s shirt but tonight, you did not want to smell his cologne. All you wanted to do is put your blanket over your head & try to forget all that had happened. No matter how hard you tried, the tears kept streaming down your cheeks.

Steve searched the entire house & the garden for you but you where nowhere to be found. He knew how you acted at parties, especially when you where alone so he started to panic slightly. Trevor was in the entrance hall & Steve walked over to him. “Dude, hey! Why did (Y/N) leave earlier? I thought you drove her here?“ Trevor managed to speak out. He was done for tonight, that was sure. “Fuck.“ Steve whispered. “She ran outta the door? Did she say where she was heading?“ Steve’s heartbeat got faster & faster. He fucked up big time. “Yeah, sure, because she had the energy to talk to me while she was literally bawling her eyes out.“ Gosh, Trevor’s sarcasm when he was drunk was the worst. Steve wished he could slap him but there were more important things to do. You. The only thing that made sense to him was you running back to your shared apartment. Even though the both of you had been living there for two years, you still were not that familiar with the neighborhood. You would never run into the dark without knowing where to go. Steve was still sober, he got into his car & drove back home, hoping he would find you there. There was light radiating from your windows which meant that you where inside. Steve let out a sigh, his heartbeat slowly going back to normal. Now the only thing he had to do was explaining himself to you. He had to confess, otherwise you would think the absolute worst of him, if you did not already.

You did not hear the main door opening, too lost in your thoughts. Your tears had dried by now but you were exhausted. Falling asleep was not an option though, you were overthinking. A knock on your door startled you. “(Y/N).“ Steve whispered, leaning his forehead on your door. He closed his eyes, hoping you would answer. Hell, he would wake you if you were asleep already. His instinct told him that you were not but he did not get an answer either. Nevertheless, he slowly opened your door. You thought that if you kept silent he would go away again. There was no way you could face him right now. Steve knew you better than anyone. You were not sleeping so he walked over to your bed, sitting down at the edge of it. It was now or never. Steve’s hand moved to your blanket, pulling it off of you. His heart broke at your sight. You had been crying because of him. You were feeling like this because of him. Your eyes were open, looking up at him through your lashes.

„Sweetheart?“ one of his hands started caressing your cheek & you were too tired to tell him to stop. “Please don’t sweetheart me. Not after what happened.“ your voice broke while trying to talk to him. You hated being so weak in front of him but you could not hide anymore. He had hurt you, a lot. “If you could just let me explain…“ “Go ahead then, it’ not like I should care, right?“ you slightly chuckled but Steve could hear the pain behind it. “I know you wanted to hold my hand back then. I only put it in my pocket because I didn’t want it to happen at a crappy party with drunk crackheads everywhere.“ that made you smile a bit so Steve continued. “I looked around for a nice, quiet place & then suddenly Dylan dragged me back inside even though I told him you were still outside. He told me it wouldn’t take long but I shouldn’t have trusted him.“ you rose up to sit in front of him, feeling a bit better. “It’s Dylan, what did you expect?“ you told Steve with a chuckle, an honest one this time. “You’re right…“ Steve chuckled. “Anyway, he simply wanted me to meet his new boyfriend aka a complete stranger he had met 2 hours prior. When I told him I need to head back to you I couldn’t find you anymore. So I assumed you went looking for me so I went looking for you. Now, sweetheart, I need you to look at me when I say this.“ he lifted your chin so your (Y/E) were locked on his blue ones. You nodded for him to continue. “Suddenly, this drunk girl came running at me, saying how much she missed me. She called me her boyfriend, Max, so I knew she was completely wasted. Before I could tell her that I am not her lost boyfriend, she started kissing me. She caught me off guard but as soon as I realized what was going on, I tried pushing her away. You had already seen me, though. (Y/N), I didn’t kiss her. Why would I ever kiss someone like her? I only wanna kiss one person & this someone is sitting right in front of me.“ he finished. Did he just? “W-What? Did yo-“ but before you could finish, Steve pulled you closer to him, putting his lips onto yours. You had dreamed for so long & it was finally happening. Steve & you were kissing each other & it felt like everything the two of you had ever imagined. As you broke apart to breath again, he kept staring into your eyes & rested his forehead against yours. “(Y/N), sweetheart, I love you, only you.“ his voice was barely above a whisper, making sure you were the only one who heard him even though it was just you two. Your eyes filled with tears again but this time because of pure happiness. It was your plan to confess to him tonight but who thought this night would end this way? “I love you too, Steve.“ you kissed him again, this time with more passion to let him know how long you had waited to do this. He stripped off his sweatshirt & jeans, leaving him in only his boxers. At first you were confused. What did he have in mind? But the second he laid down next to you, spooning you, you new what his intention was. He wanted to stay with you for the night & you were not complaining. Steve & you fell asleep, cuddling, relieved that this night, in the end, would be life-changing for the both of you.

Published 04/15/2020 by Cathy

107 notes · View notes

minniewoos · 5 years ago

Text

The Sun Will Rise Again ➣ Bang Chan

Genre: mafia au, action, romance

Pairing: chan x reader

Word Count: 6,767

Warnings: violence, swearing, death, idk

Summary: Only looking for a comfy night in, your apartment gets broken into and you’re suddenly dragged into the city’s resident mafia. Turns out the only thing saving your life was your long lost little brother and the small spot the mob boss seemed to have for you. How cliche.

There’s only so much a person could do on a winter night.

It’s 11 pm, sniffling, you pulled your comforter tighter around your body, trying to gather a little more warmth from the cool air. The lights in your bedroom were dim, so only the pale moon shone faintly through your apartment windows. A hot cup of tea was snug in the palms of your hands as the snow fell outside, landing softly in the soundless streets. You had your laptop pulled in front of you as you watched your latest Netflix obsession; despite the audio being low as to not disturb your neighbors through the paper walls, you were as immersed as you could be. It was a calm night in for you, and absolutely nothing could ruin it.

You took a sip from your mug and set it on your bedside table, eyes glued to your computer screen. Unfortunately, when pulling your hand back you bumped the cup of steaming liquid, spilling it all over your hand and floor. Cursing, you threw your comforter off and quietly rushed to your kitchen where you ran some cold water on your hand, hoping the burn is only minor. You sighed and rolled your eyes at yourself, but you weren’t going to let this ruin your night. You turned the faucet off, the silver handle creaked weakly. Quickly grabbing a few paper towels you returned to your bedroom to clean up the mess.

“Okay y/n, no more messes…” You threw the paper towels away after cleaning and smiled contently, ready to get back to your show, “Nope nope nope.”

Spoiler alert: things get messy

It’s 1 am, you’re caught up on Netflix and your eyelids were weighty. Your laptop was put away, you were ready for bed, and your pillow was the softest cloud on the planet. Content and tired, sleep was about to engulf you completely in your warm bed. Unfortunately, God had different plans for you.

BANG BANG BANG

Your eyes shoot open but you’re frozen in your bed, your blood running cold. That was the sound of somebody knocking–no, pounding on your door. And whoever it was was impatient as they kept on banging your door. You were scared they might break it down completely. Nervously you stepped out of bed, leaving the warmth and comfort it offered. You rushed to your front door and looked through the peephole; a disturbing, sinking feeling in your chest as you see three men. They were in all black clothing; no masks and you could see they were not happy.

“OPEN UP!!” One of them shouted and you felt the door jolt as he hit it once more. They would and could definitely break it down. This never happened in your area. Sure, it was a small and cheap place, but there was barely any crime around. You had no idea what to do in this state, causing your brain to go into instant panic mode.

Frightened and panicked, you grab the closest thing to you for protection: a lamp–not ideal but it would have to do…

Slowly you creep away from the door and hide, there was no way you were opening that door. It was like having a death wish and you didn’t exactly feel like dying tonight. Your chest felt like a giant snake enclosed itself around you, squeezing and constricting the breath out of you; it was terrifying. The feeling of total dread laid over you like a blanket as you hid in your kitchen, managing to fit yourself in a particularly empty cabinet. The out of place lamp and a few pots and pans kept you company.

You could hear what they were saying, as they didn’t bother keeping their voices hushed. It only made the suspense worse, and there wasn’t much room to breathe in your little hiding place and it was hard to think straight in this situation. You felt suffocated as if the small space was shrinking. Your blood was rushing upwards and you felt it pounding in your head, you couldn’t think.

“Fuck it, just break it down. That motherfucker definitely went in this one.”

The next thing you hear is a giant crack, a sort of whipping sound as your flimsy wooden door broke in two. You take in a constricted breath, your voice catching in the back of your throat. You clutch one of your metal pans as a scene from Tangled suddenly flashed through your head; you could only hope Disney did their research into frying pans.

Your eyes were clenched shut and your heartbeat was resounding in your head. You could hear the men trashing your apartment, flipping furniture over, slamming doors open, and knocking everything down. But when you heard them enter the kitchen you nearly stopped breathing. They were slamming your cabinets open one by one, and it was only a matter of time until they got to you. You couldn’t breathe, you couldn’t think.

When it was time they reached you, the pounding in your head suddenly ceased, and there was silence for a brief instant. Suddenly one of the men pulled the cabinet door open; and he saw you there, shaking, with your eyes wide with fear. He smiled and your stomach dropped. The man clutched your arm and roughly dragged you out of the tiny space. Letting out a huge sob you were limp as he shook you around, finally gasping for the breath you were holding in.

“Hey! I found this little bitch.” He called to his colleagues, then looked at you, ”Where is he!?”

You didn’t know how to answer his question, but you were positive you weren’t going to just sit there and take the abuse you were receiving. You were terrified and had no idea what was going on. So, with the frying pan in hand, knuckles white and shaking, you swung it as hard as you could at the man’s face.

Contact was made.

He was not happy.

He ripped the frying pan from your hands and slapped you, causing you to fall out of his grip but you were on the floor now with tears pricking the corners of your eyes. Immediately the other two men were in the kitchen as well.

“Where is he? Huh??” One asked, crouching down to your level. But you only looked at him, dazed and confused; you noticed they were all older men.

“She’d hiding something, she fucking slammed me with a pan.”

You shook your head, “N-no, I don’t know wh-”

You were slapped again then grabbed by the hair, forcing you to look up at them, “Where. Is. he.”

Before you could answer, there was a gunshot that echoed throughout the room. The man who pulled you by the hair quickly crumpled to the ground. You instantly backed up, your back against your wall and utterly horrified. Blood began to pool underneath the man’s body. The two others were visibly panicked and about to run, but they were cornered. Your tiny apartment was five stories up and there was no way out except for the fire escape, but they didn’t know about that.

“He had a gun on him, he had a fucking gun. You said he wasn’t armed.”

“I thought he wasn’t, I-I made sure of it-” another gunshot and the second goon dropped to the ground as well, motionless. The sound caused both you and the original intruder to flinch; the older man stumbled to the ground in fear of the figure now towering above you both.

You finally tore your eyes away from the limp bodies on the floor and up at the perpetrator. His gaze looked as if it wouldn’t hesitate to pull the trigger on the last man, and you were sure he would. But instead of killing him, he walked up to the last man, a confident stride that tells you he was more than used to these scenes. His eyes were directly on the last man, and he stopped a few inches from him to crouch to meet his eyes. You noticed an accent as he spoke lowly, “There will be no more dealings with whatever C-class group you came from. And tell your boss SKZ won’t tolerate another accident. Leave… Now.”

And with that command, the man ran. He ran for his life and didn’t hesitate to get as far away from this new guy as he could…

The new man looked at you, visibly angered; immediately your heart jumped to your throat and whatever thoughts racing through your head vanished as a realization occurred to you. You could die tonight. You slowly began to accept your fate as the man raised his gun, pointed straight at your forehead. Staring right at him, right into his eyes, you said nothing as all words were lost to you. You swallowed air and held your breath.

But he never pulled the trigger; instead, he held two fingers to his ear, he was listening to something. You noticed he had some earpiece in. A flurry of emotions crossed this man’s face; anger, confusion, surprise, then finally conflict. He lowered his gun and looked back at you, sternly but had no murderous intent as he had a few moments prior. A small wave of relief lifted off your shoulders and you could only wonder what he heard to spare your life.

“Stand up, follow me.” He ordered abruptly.

You raised your eyebrows, “Sorry?”

“I said, follow me.”

You didn’t have to be told twice as you shakily stood up as he walked out of the building with you behind him. He held his fingers to his ear again and you heard him speaking to someone on the other side

“Call the cleanup crew, it’s messy this time. Much more than it should have been. Did Seungmin jam the emergency calls? …Good, I’m coming back to the home base.” You listened in, and the only thought in your mind was what the hell had you gotten yourself into. This was clearly illegal activity and there was no reason for you to be involved. Maybe you were going to be kidnapped and sold soon, or taken hostage. Whatever it was you wanted no part of it, but at this point, you found it impossible to refuse. The man seemed like he was done talking, but he added one more comment before putting his hand down, “Tell Felix she’s safe.”

That name caught your attention and you stared keenly at the man, waiting for him to say more but he didn’t. Your thoughts began to wander again. Felix? Did he just say Felix? You gazed at the man’s back as you trailed a few steps behind him, eyes wide after hearing your brother’s name. You couldn’t think of many people with the name Felix in Korea, but one you could think of is your brother. Well, was your brother. He disappeared a few years back and nobody heard from him again, a lot of people assumed he died. And while you held onto hope that this guy, Felix, could be your Felix, you knew the idea was ridiculous. Felix was gone for years, and you could never see him doing stuff like this. But why would this Felix want you safe? Why would your life be spared? You held onto a tiny bit of hope for your brother despite the absurd idea.

When the man stopped walking, you realized he led you to a car. It was polished, all black, and unmistakably expensive. He opened the back door, looking at you expectantly. You only stared back for a moment before you realized he wanted you to get in. Your mouth opened slightly and he saw your hesitation in his request. He pursed his lips then sighed, “It’s safe, you’ll be protected and things will be explained later. But we need to leave quickly. Please get in.”

You furrowed your eyebrows; in any other situation, you would have vehemently denied ever getting into a stranger’s car like this. But considering everything you just witnessed, you were in no position to deny this man. You swallowed a lump in your throat before climbing into his backseat. He shut the door then got into the driver’s seat himself, he started the car but didn’t press on the gas as you expected. Instead, he pulled out a piece of cloth from the glove box, turned around and held it out to you.

“You’ll have to wear this on the way. You aren’t allowed to see where we’ll be going,” And very deliberately, he pulled out his gun and setting it on his dashboard for you to see, his message was clear. So, you took the blindfold from him and put it on securely. It was a couple minutes before you felt the car moving, but the silence was deafening and you were still scared shitless about where he was taking you. You didn’t want to talk and risk angering him, but there was still something you wanted to know.

“Just one thing, what’s your name?”

He didn’t answer right away, but when he did reply, his voice was calm and welcoming in a way. Much different from his stern and curt tone from earlier; you preferred it much more.

“My names Bang Chan, I wish we could have met on better terms, Lee y/n.”

∎∎∎

It was a good thirty minutes before you heard Chan turn the car off and get out, shutting the door. You heard him speak to a couple other people before he opened your door and told you your blindfold could come off. When you took it off you blinked a couple times before gawking in awe at the absolutely giant house in front of you. Even in the dark, you could tell it was an extravagant mansion. It had a very clean and chic feel to it; it had tall off-white walls with balconies spread across the sides. The tall, angular windows along with the sleek design gave it a modern and classy look to it. Your small, cheap apartment paled in comparison to this enormous house.

You looked at Chan, and the couple other guys he was with. One was broad-shouldered with a strong set jaw, while the other was shorter but you could see he wasn’t little at all and could probably pack a good punch. You nodded politely at them both, despite the unnerving feeling you had.

“I don’t see the resemblance Hyung. Is he sure he got the right person…?” The shorter one stated, his arms crossed as he seemed to analyze you. You shifted your weight and promptly avoided eye contact.

“Well whoever she is, you know the protocol. There are absolutely no witnesses; so we either kill her or take her.” The one with the broader shoulders said easily. So casually it freaked you out, just how often did they do this??

He then looked straight at you and popped a polite smile; the sudden change in attitude nearly gave you whiplash, “I’m Woojin, this is Changbin.” He gestured to the shorter one, “And you’ve already met Chan.” Then Chan also gave you a warming smile; presenting a completely different version of him you witnessed only a half-hour prior.

You nodded, not sure what to say thus you stayed silent. It felt as if one wrong step would mean life or death, but these guys are out here smiling at you. It was a conflicting situation at best and a deadly one at worst.

“Come inside, but don’t touch anything.” Chan warned you, then lead the way into the mansion.

Once inside, you could tell it was just as grand as the outside. A crystal chandelier hung above the entrance, a red carpet greeted you, and a ceiling as tall as the heavens it seemed. The decor had a white with gold accents theme to it and felt like you were on a movie set, ready to go to a ball. But instead of a ball, you were in a very different situation; one where you could die any second surrounded by people you don’t know. You swallowed the lump in your throat and sighed as you tried to calm your nerves. Everything was fine.

Following the three guys, they lead you to a sort of dining room area; big, long oak table and all. Elaborately decorated oak chairs to match, there was even the ‘big boss chair’ at one end of the long table. You swallowed and looked at Chan, your face asking what happens next. He just gestured for you to sit down while he walked over to the big boss chair. You stared at him for a solid moment before unconsciously rolling your eyes, of course, he was the boss. He exuded confidence ever since you saw him (try to kill you). Changbin saw your little eye roll and looked at you questionably, you just sat up straighter and evaded his eyes. You had a feeling the people here didn’t like you, Changbin and Woojin were staring you down, probably trying to judge your character. Chan was looking to the right at the stairs. You just took a deep breath, Woojin and Changbin were getting intimidating, so you followed Chans gaze towards the stairs and saw a few more people walking down. Specifically, four more boys came down the stairs, all calm but it seemed you were the center of attention. You gulped and looked at each boy sitting down at the table, all looking at you as well, but a couple shortly lost interest.

Nobody said anything, so you crossed your hands on the table and stated calmly albeit a bit nervous, “Hello, I’m y/n… and I’d like to kno-”

“Not everyone is here yet, we’ll introduce ourselves once the other two get here.” One who just sat down said, he seemed stern. You just sat back and stayed quiet, slightly annoyed about the chastising you got, but you knew better than to protest.

You were nervous, to say the least. But you wanted this over with asap.

It was another few minutes of silence, very awkward silence. You settled for staring at your folded hands instead of looking around, some of the boys were still judging you while others couldn’t seem to care less. You were just hoping the rest could get here as soon as possible, so this inevitably uncomfortable meeting could start.

A few minutes passed, or maybe it was a few seconds. You couldn’t tell since your sense of time slipped your mind. But a door suddenly hurled open. It startled you, causing you to flinch in your seat and your head to snap up in the direction of the loud noise. Most other boys sitting at the table turned their attention but weren’t alarmed in the slightest as if they were expecting it. In the doorway, there stood two boys. One was out of breath and rushed, you perked up at the sight of him.

“Wh-where is she?? Is she safe?” One of the boys, the owner of the unmistakable freckles and sharp eyes, questioned urgently.

There was another boy behind him, looking exhausted and annoyed, “Calm down-Chan said she was safe so there’s no need to-”

Ignoring the other boy, he scanned the room but his eyes quickly landed on you, they lit up immediately, “y/n!”

You stood up suddenly, the chair was pushed back and cluttered to the ground behind you and your hands slammed flat onto the table. You leaned forward, eyes wide and you held your breath for a moment. Then your face broke out into a huge smile, toothy grin and all, “FELIX!!!”

You ran over to him as he returned the smile, that smile you could never forget. That wonderful, beautiful, hopeful smile you grew up with. You found Felix. You ran into his arms, and he hugged you tightly; he felt so familiar and warm in this cold place. You stayed like that for a while, you couldn’t tell how long but his comforting presence was needed during this wild night. Your face was hidden and tears began to prick your eyes, sternly you pulled away and punched his chest, “Lee Felix! You have a lot of explaining to do!”

You stared at him and for a moment he looked worried, then he pulled you back into a hug and stroked your hair comfortingly, “I know, I know, I will too. But first, we need to get this done with okay…? y/n?”

You reluctantly pulled away and nodded, lips pursed and walked back to your seat, which was picked up for you. Thankfully, Felix sat next to you, as a result, it wasn’t as nerve-wracking before. But as you looked at Felix, you could see the physical difference in him; he grew up a lot in a few years. He lost the baby fat in his face, he was paler, and he definitely lost the childhood innocence you last saw him with. Felix grew up, without you; and as his older sister that hurt deep. You frowned and pushed your feelings to the side for a while, turning your attention to the group in front of you. And especially towards the big boss in the big boss seat, Bang Chan. He stared at you intently, the friendly aura he had before was gone and everyone at this moment was serious.

“Aw, what a cute reunion.” One of the boys cooed, you noticed he had especially chubby cheeks, and you couldn’t tell if he was teasing or not. You were pretty sure he was.

You only kept your silence, not going to start anything, especially with probable dangerous people. You weren’t that dumb.

“No one cares Han.” Chan spoke up, dismissing this Hans teasing, but his comment wasn’t malicious in the way you thought it would be. Not friendly either, but like two old buddies’ banter.

Chan was solemn once again and he looked straight at you. Just his simple gaze caused your heart to move up to your throat and you unintentionally swallowed the lump, “Now, miss Lee y/n, we are well aware that your involvement in tonight’s business was…nondeliberate. But due to our regulations, no outsiders are allowed to witness our business with such detail and concern. We are a very underground and discreet organization. Any attempt or the possibility of our operations being exposed are taken care of. With such a big mess that was caused in your apartment, things had to be taken care of quickly. So, there should currently be a cleanup crew at your apartment at this moment and if I’m correct, we intercepted all calls to the authorities in that area. While there was a big mess, we have it all under control, and the only outlier was you, y/n. You understand?” Chan quickly explained to you; you could only nod quietly. He then continued explaining.

“To put it simply, we were going to kill you. But Felix, our top sniper, was stationed tonight at the building next to yours. He recognized you and requested your life to be spared. Due to his high position in our organization, I accepted his request. Felix is to thank for your life. And now, since you’re here, you are still an outsider; and we will decide what to do with you. Your best option, truthfully, would be to join us. The other options…are less than desirable.” Chan finished, his eyes glued to you the entire time, stern and intense. You nodded again.

“I… have one request before we move forward.” You tread carefully, watching the others’ expressions before continuing. They were listening to you; Chan made a gesture for you to continue with your request. “I would like to know all your names, I only know a few of you. And it would be nice to know who you all are if I’m going to stay here.” You lifted your chin up, trying to stay confident while simultaneously announcing your decision to join this mafia.

Felix perked up beside you, “You’re going to join SKZ? You’re sure.”

“I mean, do I really have a choice?” You stated confidently, despite your sweaty palms and goosebumps, “I either die, or some other…undesirable outcome, or I join you guys. Am I right? I would at least like to know the people here if I stay.”

“It’s not that easy, you have to prove yourself and it’s not easy. People don’t pass often.” Woojin said calmly.

You straightened your back, “Well I’ll try.” You saw Chan smirk from the side but promptly ignore it. You also decide to ignore the little thump-thump your heart did before you looked away from him.

“Well, now that that’s settled, I’m going to introduce myself again, per your request.” Chan announced with a smile and a charismatic hand gesture, “As you already know, I’m Bang Chan. Whatever you want to call me, mob boss, mafia boss, crime lord, SKZ leader, etc. I’m basically the head guy here.”

He did it again, he changed the way he presented himself and just made you feel…comfortable. You were usually wary of people like him, but without thinking, you smirk cheekily and just say, “What about the godfather?” Internally laughing at your own lame little joke. You then realized what you said and mentally curse yourself, what an idiot. You sighed deeply before looking at the table

But Chan didn’t seem to mind, he shrugged, “It’s an offer I can’t refuse.” He’s smirking again, and your heart is acting up again. Consequently, you nervously turn away, but he continues to talk, “And I’m sorry but everyone here has work to do, it’s a very busy day. So, everyone is dismissed.”

With that command everyone got up out of their seats to continue their work, a couple smiled at you and others walked off to ignore you completely. Felix stood up but stayed by your side and Chan got out of his chair. You were confused until Felix began talking.

“I can show her around, right? I’m not as busy as the others and I can introduce her to the others in the meantime.” Felix asked politely.

Chan nodded, “Of course, I was going to show her around but it may be more comfortable for her brother to do that. But try not to take up the others’ time too much. You guys can catch up as well.” He paused then offered a gentle smile, “I think you need it.”

You smiled back thankfully, if Chan had shown you around, you could’ve guessed your hands would’ve been clammy the entire time. You don’t like it, but the way you get nervous around him is inconvenient; besides, he was going to kill you just a little while ago. Your nerves are valid. Chan left the room and the little pressure on your chest left, you looked at Felix, a little smile on both your faces.

“So… during this tour, are you going to explain yourself?”

“I-…yes.”

“Good, let’s go.” You pointed towards the staircase some of the other boys came down and walked in that direction.

“Those are the boys’ rooms.”

You swiveled around and held your arms out in any direction, “You lead the way.”

He chuckled and started walking and you followed closely behind.

“So, let’s start from the bottom, right.” Felix said, leading you into a hallway and down a set of stairs and down another hallway until we got to a set of oak doors, they weren’t huge or grand. But just a humble, plain set of doors, “This is Jeongin’s workspace.”

And with that, the tour began. You met all the members, some more gracious than others. But Felix seemed close to all of them and you were glad to spend the time with your brother. He explained what the other members were in charge of, their jobs, and their importance in the organization. During the tour is when you realized the complexities of this mafia and just how much goes into it. Felix explained as much as he could to you without going too deep into secrets that would probably get you killed if you knew, and you knew not to tread too deep right now.

You also learned there weren’t only nine people in SKZ, but each member had certain underlings who they trained or kept track of. Ensuring secrecy while also having more manpower.

You nodded at Felix, “I figured it would be weird if a mafia as powerful as SKZ only had nine people, SKZ basically rule the city from what you’ve told me. I mean you’re pretty great but I don’t think you’re superhuman.” You nudged him as you walked side by side.

“But I am superhuman. You ever seen me with a sniper rifle? I’m always on target.” He said proudly, albeit half-jokingly.

“Okay, but if you were superhuman that would not be your superpower.” You mused, “If anything it’d be…super strength. You always talked about getting bigger and working out.” And you can see since you last saw him, he did gain muscle. Only reminding you once again he’s not the same kid as before.

“Anyway.” you wondered, “Where do the underlings stay? You said before most people in SKZ are, well, stray kids.”

“They are, but SKZ sponsors boarding houses around the city and suburbs. We ensure they have a roof over their head and food on their plates.” Felix said as he gained a serious look on his face, “It’s hard for a lot of kids who have nowhere else to go. We take care of them as long as they give us loyalty back.”

It was an odd dynamic, crime lords in their twenties and teens; and they took care of other young adults. An organization of kids who constantly kept the law on its toes. It was kind of amusing to you.

Eventually, Felix lead you to a balcony, top floor of the building with a breathtaking view. As he opened the door for you, you stared at the scenery in wonder. A small golden ball rose in the distance while an ombre of oranges and pinks surrounded it. The skyline of the city SKZ owned was a shadow against the beautiful sunrise. The view was complemented by light snow flurries, but it was oddly warm out for the weather. Gentle snow, yet not frigid like it normally was, for the sun seemed to take some of the bite away from the chilly air. You stared at the lovely view until Felix caught your attention, leaning against the stone railing. You went to stand next to him and waited for him to speak.

“I thought this would be a good place to talk.” Felix frowned, he looked like he was dreading this moment. Like a child who knows he was caught and about to get scolded. He looked at you, and you frowned, furrowing your eyebrows.

“You don’t have to go into detail…but I just want to know why.” You saw it would be painful for him to recall his memories, bring up old scars in what was a hard point in his life, “We can talk more another day but, I really just want to know why…”

He let out a heavy sigh and licked his lips nervously, “I wasn’t going anywhere I wanted to in life. And I feel a lot freer than I would have if I stayed.” And there he gave you a look, and you knew that was all you would get out of him to be comfortable right now.

You only nodded, not tempted to push the subject despite the curiosity in the back of your mind. After that there was a thick silence hanging in the air, the two of you stood looking out at the city skyline as the sun rose and the day was beginning. You’d be lying if you said the atmosphere was comfortable.

You’ve been on edge all night, the highlight was finding Felix but despite that, your nerves were running wild the whole time. Your life was flipped upside down and you weren’t sure what you were going to do anymore. All you wanted to do was sleep but instead, your apartment got broken into, you almost got murdered, and now you’re joining the mafia. Even with Felix by your side, your beloved brother, you weren’t as happy as you would’ve thought. This whole night was overwhelming for you, and in spite of Felix’s best efforts to make you feel content, you were always on edge. Felix must’ve read the atmosphere and looked at you, noticing your frown he looked down and sighed.

“I can leave you for a little while, you look like you want some time.”

You shrugged, “Maybe just an hour? Then I’ll need some sleep…” you said reluctantly, you did just want to rest alone, despite Felix being the only familiar thing to you here.

Felix only nodded understandingly and headed towards the door, and before he shut it, he turned around and smiled, “I’ve missed you, a lot y/n.” And with that, he shut the door, leaving you by yourself there. The city ahead of you, the rising sun behind the city, and the tiny snowflakes floating around you; you noticed they melted as soon as they reached the ground. And you realized that as soon as Felix left, you didn’t want to be alone, it felt empty. You just wanted to feel safe again.

You stood there in silence for a while, your thoughts running from one place to another. Eventually, you just smiled to yourself as an odd laugh bubbled up from your throat; it was short, high pitched, and full of absolute disbelief. You pinched yourself a couple times, just to make sure this wasn’t some elaborate dream you were stuck in. After looking at the city once more, you rubbed your eyes with the incredulous smile still gracing your face. Only one thought crossed your mind, “What the fuck.”

“Mafia? Long lost brother? Hot and rich boss? What is this a drama?” You muttered to yourself, exhausted and confused. Leaning on the banister, you hung your head low with a sigh as you stared at the ground below you.

Then you snapped your head up, “I just called Bang Chan hot and rich…” you groaned and rubbed your face, “Just kill me.”

Then, you heard the sound of the balcony door shutting and you silently cursed yourself. Somebody just walked onto the balcony and surely heard you talking to yourself like a madman, ninety percent sure it was Felix. You weren’t in the mood to hear Felix teasing you about calling his boss hot, and he most definitely would do that.

You turned around with a frown, ready for a snarky comment to come your way. But you were met with dimples and a cheeky smile instead. Here you found yourself face to face with the man himself, Bang Chan.

An ‘oh god’ was uttered from your lips as the blood from your body gradually moved to your cheeks, the heat of your embarrassment was overwhelming. This was definitely a drama and you were the cringey main character. You were half expecting Chan to walk back out, but instead his grin just got wider.

“Rich? Yes. Hot? Now that’s objective.” He said, dimples on display with a small chuckle.

“You know what’s not objective, my embarrassment.” You leaned your back on the banister, fully facing Chan now. But your face was turned down and your arms were crossed, You were clearly flustered and apparently Chan seemed to find that amusing but he held his arms up as if in surrender.

“You didn’t hear anything, got it?” You warned with a pointer finger in his direction. Your cheeks were red and you were definitely not intimidating. But Chan played along anyway.

“Hear what?” The dimples were back and your heart might have done a somersault.

You smiled, “Nothing.”

Then you both laughed, soft and short laughs. His laugh sounded genuine, a small chuckle that showed a mutual amusement for the little interaction you shared. And despite the embarrassment still fresh on your mind, you seemed to have calmed down some.

You then looked back out to the city skyline, outlined by the orange sky. That’s when you heard the scraping on chairs behind you, you looked around and found that Chan had pulled up a couple of chairs next to the banister. He sat down comfortably and patted the seat next to him, motioning for you to sit down.

“Come on, you must be tired.”

Almost instantaneously you collapsed into the chair, the cushions were like heaven as you leaned back and closed your eyes. And as soon as you sat down, the exhaustion you barely felt before hit you like a wave. Your eyes became heavy and you yawned out, “Thank you.”

It was a long night, and you were grateful for his kindness.

“Listen, y/n,” He rested his hand over yours comfortingly, he got your attention, “I know it’s a lot to take in. The night was stressful and unfamiliar. You felt unsafe, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you still feel like that. I apologize for dragging you into all of this, it was distressing for you. But I will try to make it so you can feel comfortable and safe with Stray Kids. You will have time to adjust and learn the routines here, and of course finding your place with us. If you ever need help, you can come to me and I will try my best. And of course you have Felix, even the others in here. We will keep you safe, okay?” Chan looked at you intently, speaking with purpose and a genuine heart. It was the gentlest you’ve seen him and what he said had touched your heart. It was as if the dark cloud hovering over your heart cleared away a bit, the stress was lifted with his words. You looked into his eyes and you knew he stood by his words.

“Thank you, Chan,” you looked down at your lap, “truly, I mean it.”

“SKZ is a safe haven to a lot of people, and I want it to be one for you too.”

You nodded with a faint smile on your lips, then you looked up at the rising sun and the beautiful scene before you. It was like you couldn’t get enough of it, “It’s a beautiful view, isn’t it?”

Chan hummed in agreement and the two of you fell into a comfortable silence as you both watched the sunrise. Despite whatever happened previously, you felt oddly relaxed next to Chan. He wasn’t familiar like Felix, but he gave off a similar warmth as Felix did. Well, at least now he did, you had seen a lot of different sides of Chan in one night. But this one was the warmest one, and you were glad for the company and ease he provided.

Eventually, as the both of you sat in comforting silence, sleep caught up to you and you felt your heavy eyelids finally close. The songs of morning birds lulled you to drift off to sleep. After your crazy night, it didn’t take long for you to go into a deep sleep, your head suddenly falling to one side. You were out and weren’t waking up soon.

Chan, enjoying the moment, started to hear soft snores from you. He knew you were sleeping before he even looked over, and he didn’t realize it, but the corner of his lips turned up ever so slightly. Thinking your neck looked uncomfortable, he scooted his chair a bit closer to yours and moved your head so that you were leaning on his shoulder. Not even stirring as he moved you. He even wrapped his jacket around you, providing you with some more warmth. Later, he would bring you back inside and let you rest somewhere more snug and comfortable, but right now, he just wanted to enjoy the moment and let you relax.

Chan smiled as he looked at you, the worry that’s been present on your face all night was gone and you finally looked at peace. The stress and anxiety seemed to disappear with sleep. He thought you were beautiful. Very softly, Chan promised, “You are safe here, you won’t be harmed with us. I’ll make sure of it.”

a/n: I honestly think it’s still kinda rough, but I’m impulsive and couldn’t wait any longer to post it so tada~ Like I said before this is gonna be a series so every members gonna get a story. idk who’s next but look forward to it!

1K notes · View notes