#idk how tf to draw birds

[cookiebonbon]

OMG WHATS THIS A DRAWING FROM ME???

Anyways hi just some silly Theo sketches because I like making crazy men cute 😋 (ft crow)

Shy to say this but very slightly based on @/loodgack's neighbor (the hair and mustache that is ig)

Now I should sleep cuz it's almost 2 am and I have school tomorrow and need to get up at 7 am 🥰

[plaidpyjamas]

just call me Kira (cause I drew half of this in the dark with my left hand inside a chip bag)

[un-vaticand]

for modern Gary and modern John-

do either of y'all have pets? for some reason i envision Gary at least liking cats or smth.

(i remember John having a cat in previous posts, but i thought that was before asks were opened for the modern au.)

"Ah, no, I have no pets. But I very much want birds. I love birds, so sweet and cute, they're absolutely perfect! Though I don't have enough money or time for them."

"If I could I'd probably adopt 1 or 2 of them. They are such fantastic little creatures♥︎"

"Yes!! I have three cats. Venenum, Darling, and Sweetpea, I love them so much. Venenum was a stray I found near the coffee shop Kate works at, while I got the two others from animal shelters."

((/OOC: thx for ask! ^_^))

Bonus image

Idk how tf to draw cats I'm sorry LOL

[definitelynotshouting]

context: ik most of my asks are pretty disorganized, stream of consciousness type of thing but GEEZ this got out of hand. you know that thing cats do when they bring you a dead mouse and *they're* super proud of it and you're just like dude.. why /lh

i usually put whatever my immediate thoughts are after reading the chapter and this time i thought it might be fun to write it out before. can you tell im running on five hours of sleep?? lmk if this made any coherent sense because even i dont understand it!!

so last chapter ripped my heartt out and stomped on it. i am LIVING for the way this whole thing was written, gorgeous prose as always <3. i was very curious as to wether Mumbo would question Grian but i think him NOT doing that was SO in character, and i adore it. I feel like w/ some fics (my own writing included) Scar is the ONLY one Grian relies on for support (in ANY area), and whenever Mumbo is even in the picture, he's just kinda "there", he doesn't check up on Grian or broach the topic of whatever is currently plaguing our little bird guy (basically, he's not involved in Grian's life despite being "his best friend"). And the way you characterized him was just So Real?? I would wager a guess (correct me if im wrong ofc) that part of it is that he just DOESNT know, (because Grian is oh so good at telling half truths and privately justifying his self sabotage) but a part of it is also him being lowkey willfully ignorant. he doesnt WANT Grian to be sick (mentally or otherwise) but definetly knows that SOMETHING is up. he really WANTS to help fix whatever is going on (evident by the gold farm) but he doesnt know what Grian needs or how to help him.

i have been OBSESSING over how Grian saying goodnight to Mumbo was ACTUALLY his goodbye to him but Mumbo DOESNT KNOW AND ITS EATING ME ALIVE. (also thought it was super interesting how Grian sort of took Mumbo leaving to sleep as "permission" to do the deed)

side ish note: how tf does Grian even plan to do that?? ik he's got the spider eyes and i *think* he's planning to turn the healing potions into weakness potions but like?? how is he going to do that??? i would assume that the gang would be watching the potions AS they were brewing, and even if they weren't, healing potions and weakness potions are.... vastly different colors. (unless im mixing them up with something else). also aren't they going to walk in on him prepping or already being in the middle of it and just save him like last time? the team as a whole has done a pretty good job on keeping an eye on Grian (from just a "this person can't walk" standpoint) so far. is he waiting for a chance when everyone is busy or does he plan to use MORE weakness potions to make it stronger or quicker?? im interested to see if he's even going to follow The Plan, because up until this point he's been pretty careful with trying to make plans and sneak around EXCEPT for the spider eyes basement adventure, which makes me wonder is he'll get more frantic/desperate as the appointed time draws closer.

Real talk though, Mumbo (and everyone else) is going to be beating himself up over not noticing when stuff goes down (which i would assume would be next chapter, but idk). Also, the fact that Grian asked him to stay means A LOT. To me (and idk if this is what you meant to convey) that signals that a part of him WANTS to stay. theres a part of him that wants to continue to experience the comfort and joy he gets from his friends, but he feels like he's only going to continue to hurt them, so to him this is the ONLY option to keep them safe. also the majority of his existence is just misery and pain so thats probably not helping. (PLUS the whole slew of mental health issues, this is not purely self sacrificial).

anyway, i LOVED this chapter as always, it was like chicken noodle soup for my overworked little soul and i savored every bit of it!! (also, no need to apologize for not having enough spoons!! i dont have any chronic illnesses but i know that shit sucks. this is a particularly long ask for me so dont feel compelled to answer everything in it, or answer right away. hope ur doing well <3)

-🐛

BUG ANONNNN THIS COMMENT IS SO SWEET AND I LOVED READING IT OMGGGG

you hit the nail exactly on the head for where im going with mumbo's characterization-- there is 100% a level of willful ignorance there. Ive always felt like mumbo is the kind of guy who has a thing about avoidance-- he feels very much like a character who will absolutely do his best to ignore things that hes decided arent his business (right up until he stops LMFAO) and part of that in hunger au is him being so anxious for grian to get better that he stops looking at the red flags grian is aggressively waving around. It'll work out!! He's sure of it!! Grian even directly said he's trying to get better!! And i think if he looked at that for longer than it takes for him to flinch away from the entire subject, he would see how much of a bald lie that is.

But he doesnt, because thats a LOT to deal with, and hes never really??? Seen this side of Grian before??? Not the way Pearl and Scar have. Theres a lot of intricacy there that i feel im skimming over but like Mumbo is very much keeping his own sanity in mind here too and thats another painful factor to the whole situation. Idk i have lots of thoughts about it and about the choice here to depict Mumbo giving in to that willful ignorance, and how its going to affect his and Grian's relationship in the future of the fic

(Quick tw for frank discussions of suicide below)

You've also completely nailed the subtext i was getting at with Grian asking Mumbo to stay-- smth ive always felt is a bit underrepresented in narratives like these are how at its most base core, suicide and suicidal ideation are often about needing something to fundamentally change in your life. It takes a LOT of both hopelessness and sheer willpower to actively try and overcome your body's instinctive will to survive. That instinct is baked into our very cells; when someone commits, it means their hopelessness for meaningful change to happen in their lives was so strong it overpowered everything else. And that is something deeply, deeply tragic, and also something i really wanted to respectfully highlight in this portrayal-- how bad things are when you spiral that far. Grian is starving to death. He wasnt lying about maybe having a week to live-- the intermittent feeding has kept him alive longer than anticipated, but its like trying to wall off an avalanche; theres only so much you can do in the face of all that :( and that hopelessness, in combination with how guilty he feels for what he did to his friends, has manifested in him feeling like his only recourse is to kill himself... but at the same time, that instinct to survive and KEEP SURVIVING is still blaring in his veins, and that manifests as him asking Mumbo to stay. Its a bit paradoxical, but its meant to really show how bad his mental state is, that he is willfully ignoring all the frantic signals his body is screaming at him to try and stay alive rn 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also, with the potions-- without revealing too much about how this is going to happen, Grian is planning on making fermented spider eyes and using them to turn the healing potions into harming potions, which he'll then drink in the in-between to make sure he dies immediately. Now.. i know how this is gonna go, and i know the exact mechanics around how this is gonna shake out, but smth to keep in mind is hes not thinking logically anymore, he has FULLY capitulated to his own storm of emotional wreckage. So yes there are DEFINITELY some questions to be asked about how hes gonna try and get this done, but in all honesty they mostly boil down to "sheer opportunity" which you'll see a bit more of in the next chapter >:] but yeah its meant to be a bit illogical skdbwkdjskd since he just isnt thinking coherently anymore at this point :(

Bug anon thank u for my entire life this comment was so sweet and so wonderful to receive, i really love it when my writing is analyzed like this and seen and understood!!! Its amazing its such a wonderful feeling to have your work be seen like this and its something i very much do not take for granted :]]]❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ tysm for the ask i am seriously treasuring it SO MUCH rn (and also thank you for the well-wishes!! Im doing my best to stay silly out here HEHE)❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[puppy-the-mask]

We finished season 4 and I immediately clocked Azure as Elfman from fairytail and then found out his va is also All Might

Gonna put all my thoughts about it in one post under the cut

I’m so happy MK’s past is being touched on as a main plot line and also- Pigsy literally being MK’s adoptive dad made us emotional ;w; HE CALLED HIM SON- MK CALLED HIM DAD I’m fucking sobbing ;;;A;;;

Also I’m about to throw down with this fucking bird- even in the brotherhood he wouldn’t shut the fuck up and kept giving Macaque shit FOR NO REASON- how tf can you call yourself someone’s friend and just keep calling them a coward when Controlling Shadows and Sneaking Around is LITERALLY THEIR STRONG SUIT. Imma make a fucking duck roast out of him

On the topic of Macaque homeboy made a fucking bootleg of wukong’s game XD with the ‘I just picked up a ‘how to draw anime’ book’ artstyle I love him so much and he’s so genuinely nice helping MK out with his issues I’m so happy. He came to cause havoc and slander Wukong and then the moment he saw Mk glitching out and struggling with his power he got serious. *Bangs my fist on the table* THIS MAN!!! *ahem* I am completely normal about this

On the flip side we are DISTRAUGHT over what happened with the demon bull family. I think my mom is gonna kill Azure for trapping Redson- we’ll tag team ‘em XD I love how much they genuinely adore each other. They fought against each other and fell in love enemies to lovers style I swear these are the best characters and they don’t even get touched on half the time It’s A Travesty

Also it annoyed me that Azure immediately blamed Mk for trying to get Wukong back and blamed him for the tablet breaking when HE WAS THE ONE TO SLICE IT- IT LITERALLY WOULDN’T HAVE BROKEN HAD THIS BITCH NOT WHIPPED OUT HIS SWORD. He’s so quick to judge others and is blind to his own hypocrisy, if he stopped for one moment to talk things out before hand things wouldn’t have gone bad but then he gets all sad that others didn’t act according to his plan. I can somewhat understand him but homeboy needs to take a step back and look inwards for a hot sec. I do appreciate that he was trying not to involve the group in the matter since they aren’t their ancestors, and let them choose to involve themselves though. So I kinda like him but his lackeys not so much, especially that fucking bird >:(

Also idk about anyone else but during S3 when Nezha (?)was teamed up with Mk -for like a single fight- my brain went ‘big bro vibes’. Cause I can’t not put everyone into the found family like a buncha dolls in my new lmk doll house XD but I’m excited to see how he’ll fit in the group dynamic and if he’s gonna be a bigger character next season. He seems really cool!

ALSO THE DRAGON- MEI’S DRAGON ANCESTOR- OMFG HE’S SO CUTE. Dude is adorable- they gave him oversized sleeves and he’s so chill XD 10/10 character design he was so nice homie was just chilling in the dungeon unbothered. ‘Just make a new sword? 🙂’ and he was so right- he’s so incredibly based I love his vibe and he was only here for like 5 minutes

[pinkeebwui]

15 questions for 15 tags ~

Tagged by @figthefruitfaeth, who is the only one to keep me in ask game content www (not that I can tag you without looking up my notifs rn…….)

1. Are you named after anyone?

One of my middle names is after my mom’s great-grandmother.

2. When was the last time you cried?

I don’t know specifically but probably early this month; the holidays were giving me a hard time and I was missing home a lot.

3. Do you have kids?

Who tf do you think I am?? the tumbkr population is aging but not that much!! And, in this economy??

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

My family runs on it, so yes.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Now I’m being asked about it? Idk. Probably hair or maybe scent (especially perfume/cologne - I’m sensitive to scent and don’t like them).

6. What’s your eye color?

Depends on the light, usually like, pale blue.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings. Scary movies are too much for me, I find them unpleasant overall. And just because you have a happy ending doesn’t mean you don’t have tragedy and hardship before it, that’s what makes it worth finishing.

8. Any special talents?

I’m pretty good with animals and babies, apparently, but other than that idk. I can cross my eyes? Lol

9. Where were you born?

USA, the land of 20oz boba, real lemonade, and barbecue

10. What are you hobbies

I have a lot of them, but I haven’t been able to get to my creative ones much. I collect kpop stuff (Hinged), I draw sometimes, embroider, paint, etc. I read when I have time. I also like trying new desserts at the convenience store. And I’ve considered picking up calligraphy recently, I need to inquire about the classes though.

11. Do you have any pets

Not of my own; my family has like. A small zoo. Ten? Cats, dogs, and some budgies we ended up with because they were lost and unclaimed at the shelter and we have a little experience with birds. Oh, and am ancient, belligerent Pygmy goat.

12. Have you ever played/do you play any sports?

I swam competitively year-round when I was a kid for probably over ten years; not super talented or anything like my friends who’ve gone to trials, but because it was fun. I stopped mostly around late middle school, did a final two summer leagues, then quit for good. I also used to dance (11 years, 10 of them ballet) casually. And I had started a volleyball class right at the start of the pandemic then couldn’t finish it for obvious reasons. I’d love to pick up archery again, or kyuudo specifically.

13. How tall are you

5’7” or thereabouts, I get a different number every time a nurse who’s shorter than me measures 🤷🏼

14. Favorite subject in school

English and history, I always really enjoyed history as a kid and through high school, and then grew into my love of English later on as I grew into an interest in writing as well as reading. Monkey read, monkey do. I also really enjoyed art, particularly in high school. I took all the offered classes and then did an independent study and was kind of the one art teacher’s… mot favorite, but something close to it.

15. Dream job

I don’t know, frankly. Doing whatever I want and getting paid to do it? Like, whatever strikes my mood as I feel like it, be it writing, editing, something like library clerking and potentially programming, something creative with a more physically tangible product, teaching. The flexibility to live and also hop around. I used to think it was writing, but I don’t think I’d like writing anymore if it were my main source of income.

I’m not tagging 15 people but @willthewhompingwillow @polliniaa @taebaelee @infernalfae @something-wild-cat if you feel so inclined

[dkniade]

Start ID. Seven images about Dungeon Meshi with beige background and black text and sketches accompanied by pointform notes. First image says: “my impressions of dungeon meshi characters based on what i've seen on my tumblr dash (featuring my shitty drawings from memory). from my understanding, this is kind of a dnd themed anime/manga. i have no idea what the plot is but it has a lot of races and monsters from dnd and i think the main characters are like a party? but i have no sources on that. now that ive made this i do plan to read it [smiley face].” second image is a sketch of Marcille smiling while holding onto a staff. Text says: “marcille. princess zelda basically. seems like the smart one. magic user? idk [I don’t know] if she has a staff but i gave her one. will probably be my fave i love her design”. Third image is a sketch of Laios with a neutral expression. Text says: “laios. falin's brother. how tf [the fuck] do you say his name. autistic king (literally? i think he's royalty of some sort). knows what he's doing”. Fourth image is a sketch of Falin, smiling. Text says: “falin. laios's sister. lesbians with marcille which i fully support. actually a bird person?? seems pretty chill (possibly smokes weed every day)”. Fifth image is a sketch of Chilchuck standing, crossing his arms while frowning disapprovingly. Text says: “chill chuck. looks like a 13 year old boy but is actually a middle aged man. idk [I don’t know] what race he is but he's not human. done with everyone's shit. misses his wife. i keep seeing that northern boys edit of him”. Sixth image is a sketch of Senshi standing. Text reads: “senshi. big beard dwarf guy. mysterious. what things has he seen. gay with chuck?” Seventh image says “other friends” with a sketch of Izutsumi frowning with hands on her hips and and an arrow pointing to her saying “catgirl”, and a sketch of Kabru smiling with an arrow pointing to him saying “guy that looks like this?” end ID.

this is so goofy but i've absorbed way too much secondhand content about them i couldn't not do it.

[transbotsenbycons]

new silly TF OC idea

beastformer with a wolf alt mode but when he gets angy/full moon/idk, gets a virus??? he becomes a robo-werewolf, like on two legs and shit

not gonna draw this one like my other silly TF OC ideas bc i cant draw dogs

[fr-wiwiw]

Continuation- idk why Tumblr keeps giving me error when I post this answer

10. Has a piece of drawing ever “haunted” you? Has your own drawing haunted you? What does that mean to you? Boy do have several... Let me show you 1 of them

This one basically portrays my love for How to Train Your Dragon and skies. I've always love sky watching when I can. I enjoy seeing the far distance and the fluffs of the cloud. I can see the clouds moving from here to there when the wind picks up. The vast blue or orange pinkish or dark greyish blue when night comes. I love, loveeee skies. This one is me studying color from a post I saw in Artstation. I love the color scheme the artist use for their piece and I saw this shape of cloud from Pinterest by a japanese artist I think or a fanartist where a school girl walks to the end of the open street with railings on the edge and it leads to this big white cool colored cloud and neon warm blue sky behind it. I don't remember their respective usernames, but I try to study the shape and textures, add a lot of my own tastes while experimenting with certain brushes I never used while incorporating the warm colors instead of cool tones. The yellow grass field, birds, Toothless and his Lightfury all are something I put there to give some size difference and perspective. All in all, this study is an inspirational piece that came from 2 different types of artstyle and I marry them in my head and make a baby out of it. Come to think of it, perhaps the yellow grass field is me influenced by RDR2 where I make character gallops her horse in Great Plains near Blackwater. Man I miss playing that game. But yeah, it haunts me because I want to draw skies again. Just.. enjoy environment drawing again but ever since I'm too bored and sick of drawing creatures, landscapes and all. I change my course to character and human drawing. Because I didn't know what to make out of my previous drawings. I didn't understand how to gain commission from that, idk how to get audience that are willing to pay me for what I do ( I still don't, still learning now). And back then I was just desperate for something. It pains me to do that bcs I love it, but I know I had to do something to make money. I wonder if I'll ever go back to paint all these again and let my self just... be.. without worrying about income. I know I will. It'll take time, but I definitely will come back to this because I like concept arts, mainly I do character concept design, so.. there's that. It definitely will keep haunting me along with several other that makes me think, can I draw this again? how tf did i draw this? will I be able to create something like this or much better? Will I get that much likes again on social media? I'm always stressed by my own thoughts so the pressure is wooweee hahah I know a lot of artists or writers can relate with this inner turmoil.

12. If a genie offered you three drawing wishes, what would they be? Btw if you wish for more wishes the genie turns all your current WIPs into Lorem Ipsum, I don’t make the rules Love the question and the quirky-ness lol

1 is that wish is to have the audiences I want and need to prolong my life. I apologize it's not something poetic or grandeur but this one is reality. wish my clients are blessed with fortunes so they can keep commission me :3

2 is confidence and the ability to just do and do, starting from now. These 2 are something related to our inner self. I know I will get there, it'll take time and effort to do it. But I want it instantly right now and it stays in me until I breathe my last breath. How many of us are trapped in our mind and "laziness" and fear? I said laziness bcs I, for one, know that yes I'm lazy but I can overcome this, so why is it so hard for me to just do? It's my perfectionism, self-critiques, fear and my mental traumas that hinders it. All of these are born from external. Perhaps we're shaped like this by our family, parents, siblings. Perhaps the environment we grow up didn't necessarily supports the well being of our mental health, bullied or gaslighted accidentally or intentionally, neglected or just perhaps people love us but they don't know how to really treat us? Or we don't know yet what we need and who we want to be treated- I can go on and on. Some can be our faults, some might be accidents, no one is to blame. But it hurts and affects us all the same.

3 is get opportunities free in-depth tutorials by artists I look up to, timeless tutorials, not racing with time (slow the time!) so I can take all the time I need OR get recognized, get connections that will help me be recognized by my skills. I did think to get instant max level skills in art and other things in creative world I want to explore and not afraid of my age and this.. rushing hours of the world. It keeps changing rapidly ever since technology (I still enjoy this tbh, it's just a fact that the world is changing fast) and AI. Man... I'm devastated that most people who creates and use AI utilize it to cheat their way in life, where it's supposed to help us live our lives. I honestly enjoy the process of growth, despite how fucking hurtful it can be. But that's the joy of the process. Whereas this certain technology makes you want everything instant, it's like you're digging your grave fast while wanting to enjoy everything at such a rapid pace while you're at it. Perhaps some people do enjoy that. Watching videos at 2x speed and said yea that's great and move on. ??? Where's the basking in the feelings and experience? I don't understand but I can't really blame them if they're racing against time to enjoy something. I just can't wrap my head around it yet. Anyway, I'm not gonna ramble too much on this one to save you the pain.

15. Do you write in the margins of your books? Dog-ear your pages? Read in the bath? Why or why not? Do you judge people who do these things? Can we still be friends? - I will assume writing in the margins is like make some random / related doodle to the subject I'm drawing in the bigger picture. Yes I do! Sometimes it gets foggy in my mind and it makes me unable to visualize something (example: a 3D turn of a leg with armor).

I will sketch it out wherever near the subject, map it out first until I make something that looks makes sense and copy paste it or redraw it on the bigger main subject. It's usually messier than the one I post up there, I always delete it immediately when I feel like I've nailed down what I want to do as to not distract me. So I rarely have the doodles existing there ^^" I should tho, that would be a lovely thing in record actually to keep myself reminded of the process how I do that subject lol. - Dog-eared pages.. hmm. I do dog-eared some page in my sketchbook if I like them or if I want to come back and read some notes of ideas or some studies I put in it. I actually slap some post-it too there - Draw in bath. Oh I wish I'm able to do this lmao but I will be dreading my bath time at some point if I don't separate my drawing time with my break and pampering time. But I do imagine things in my head. My brainrot otps (Gahan mainly now) or some games I just played with randoms or friends, some ideas that pops in my head outta nowhere (y'know, that bathroom inspiration) - I don't judge ppl who do this bcs it's just so damn hard to turn off your brain and just be blank in your head. I will probably judge you at some point if you bring your laptop or ipad into your bath, or traditional sketchbooks and paint as you bath bcs... honey, the water's gonna ruin the paper. I know watercolor paper can withstand water but sinking it more than minutes and hours?? I'm not sure, what're you doing huh?? But I do wanna know other people's version of this! If they do bring their stuff to draw to baths, I will be flabbergasted but entertained at the same time cs, tell me! story time! - Of course we can still be friends if that's what you do. I will nag and laugh but I will appreciate your existence anyway and that will probably be in my memory about you forever xD There's a reason why we're friends and your quirkiness are tolerable. We artists and writers and what not are.....unusual creatures anyway.

I will continue on next answer post, Idk why Tumblr is not working for me today :(

hiii, do you want to do an artist's version of this fun writer's asks game? i'm so curious about what you think of 5, 10, 12, 15, 19, 23

hi there! thanks for this fun game! lemme copy the question to change some of the words and answer them right away xD I will put aside my experience as writer and reader too bcs this is artist version so the answers will be strictly from my experience as an illustrator!

5. Do you have any drawing/painting superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true? Oh gosh, good question- I'm guessing this is some kind like ritual or routine I do before I start scribbling in my sketchbook or digital canvas. I think I kinda do and don't. Since this new year, I started to intentionally journal my thoughts out when I woke up. This is recommended from the book that's called The Artist's Way, some kind like spiritual guide for artists. I've only read up until the page where the author said to take your inner child out to date- creative dates. Anyway, basically the journaling I do religiously now has to be 3 pages and pour any thoughts that came onto my mind. Taking out trash from our mind daily instead letting it piling for months waiting to be taken out. I only do 2.5, my right arm and shoulder always aching since few years ago. But so far, it does helps me a bit with my overthinking and be discipline about my healthy habits. I'm not the best at discipline so I'm proud I'm able to keep this going for almost 3 months now. The other thing, which I'm not sure is something superstitions, is to look up drawings by other artists or watch movies, see fanarts, read fanfics, or just be in my mind, to get inspired and start drawing. I'm mostly brain rot driven or if I'm seeing something very often, I will draw it. I'm trying not to count on my brain rot energy too often bcs I want to be able to draw with and without the brain rot. It's still fluctuates but I'm better than I was years ago. I'm happy with the progress! I will continue on next answer post, Idk why Tumblr is not working for me today :( so this will be 6 answer post, I'm so sorry

[battery-forgot]

Now, I come mid-week to give you all of my DSMP/MCYT headcanons because I have many

Don’t mind if these are repeated, misspelt, or has no logic, it is block game things and I am not checking over them-- and some will be organized, and some will be random, some might not have a Enter space because these are all ctrl c + ctrl v’ed from a Discord server I am in :]

Skeppy headcanons: Skeppy is 4 billion years old as scientists have thought that is how long ores and diamonds existed for

Skeppy's species is pretty rare

Every diamond that is broken or damaged causes Skeppy to feel a physical pain in his body

His species has lamp tail as they don't have night vision, some of them also have tiny wings that aren't usable, though they can kinda glide short distances with them

Because of his small height, he has taught himself magic to be able to change size, it can hurt him if he goes taller than 5'3, but he is able to get to Foolish's height if he tried

Sometimes random crystals grow on Skeppy's face, though they look different from normal crystals and can be used for things like explosives, though he doesn't know about it

Techno has seen Kristen but doesn't remember it well, though Kristen gave him his crown as a gift

Techno has a collection of skull masks that he has worn, he wears the skulls because of nostalgia now but he used to wear them because he thought they were cool and made him look threatening

Technoblade, Skeppy, Sam, Ranboo, Michael(the son- not Michaelmcchill), Phil, Bad, and some others really like shiny and golden objects

DreamSMP theme/"timeline" is kind of like a steampunk like thing

Drista is DreamXD's sister and DristaXD is Dream's "sister", though they aren't really siblings as they are robots

Drista and DreamXD are clones of DristaXD and Dream, though they actually look nothing alike

Callahan is a mute mini-god that everyone knows exists but doesn't really understand they are a mini-god. They kind of just chill and do what people ask them to do

Phil: Phil is more into traveling than anything else

Though he doesn't mind being a father figure, he doesn't think he is a good one especially after he killed Wilbur

He is able to turn into the size of a crow, though since his wings are now unusable, he doesn't do it as often as it is basically useless

Phil sometimes takes bird baths, though I guess they are always called that-

He has bird legs/talons,but they aren’t fully noticeable

joke headcanon I thought of is that Phil's handwriting is chicken-scratch because he is half-crow

Phil has really good memory, as a crow would

-DreamXD is actually pretty weak in powers, but he acts like he is the strongest person in the server

-Tommy's eye is just completely gone from when Dream killed him, but he covers it with an eyepatch

-Tubbo talks about things to Ranboo thinking he'll forget them, but some stories Ranboo remembers but doesn't speak about it because he doesn't want to make Tubbo worry too much

-Philza wasn't willing to kill Wilbur so Wilbur forced Phil by grabbing his arm and impaling himself

-Dream and Techno sometimes share stories about having ADHD

-Phil didn't really know about Fundy, he knew he existed but had no idea to how he acted, looked, or his actual name

-Wilbur had a letter written to Fundy about how he was sorry for what he was gonna do during November 16th, but the withers blew it up before Fundy knew about it

-Fundy doesn't let anyone hold his hand because it makes him remember the past where he would hold Wilbur's hand a lot

-Change of headcanons: Schlatt and Puffy are cousins, Tubbo was just a random kid that would follow Schlatt for hours a day, waiting for him to acknowledge him

-Dream jumps into the lava in the prison as it reminds him of Sapnap

-Bad was uncomfortable when Sapnap married Big Q and Karl because he went on a date with Quackity before but he still supported them (Yes I know Big Q basically had a divorce with Sap and Karl--)

-Skeppy knows a lot about other's pasts because of how old he is, even traumatizing facts

-Skeppy has a fear of fire (Pyrophobia) and he is kind of scared of Sapnap

-Dream used the revivebook on the cat Tommy killed, but Sam killed it thinking Dream would use the cat against Sam to escape quicker in the future

-Dream doesn't *fully* know why he is in prison, ever since Tommy and Tubbo killed him, a wire/chip broke in his body which made him forget a lot of things. Dream does get told what he had done a lot, but it makes him almost have a panic attack because he thought he was a pretty good person

-Ghostbur is Callahan, they were commanded by DreamXD to become Ghostbur so that everyone could feel like he was still there (Callahan can change who they are completely, but they don't actually know how they acted when as Ghostbur, though that doesn't mean he didn't know what happened, when Dream killed/revived Ghostbur, Callahan got to see what it felt like to die for the first time)

-Fundy has the habit of picking up things and using them at some sort of fidget (examples: knives, leaves, grass, wood, pencils, berry stems, etc.

-Ranboo will be writing/saying something about someone and use pronouns instead of their name or just with the person's name (example: "Puffy she/her was--" or "he/him writing down things") [Basically canon-]

-Tubbo used to headbutt people but stopped after around 2 years because he kept hurting people

-Phil used to squawk randomly when he was a kid, but he mainly just squawks when hiccuping now

-Even though Bad used to get really nervous picking people up because he was afraid he was gonna drop and kill them, he now just picks up everyone randomly... except Foolish and Ranboo

-Foolish is able to shrink to around 7ft, and unless he is building a big build, he will shrink so he can get around easier

-Because Ranboo is only half enderman, he isn't the full height of an enderman (He is only 8'5)

-If someone asks Charlie about his pronouns, out of confusion, he just responds with "Bones!" which sometimes leads Las Nevadas members (or just anyone really) calling him by He/it/Bones

-When Bad was being controlled by the egg, it made him get even more flashbacks about how his species was supposed to act which would end up with him panicking because that isn't who he wants to be (bonus: The more a member infected by the egg would panic, the more the egg would be able to take over the person because they can't focus)

-Kristin has taught Phil how to do makeup in their free-time of hanging out

-Kristin is insanely tall, if she shrinks then she turns more transparent, so she ends up looking more like a ghost when at average height

-Skeppy can't cry, though he still can feel sad

-Bad and Eret talk to eachother quite a lot

-When Tubbo was around 11-14, he would make redstone contraptions, though he doesn't remember how to make most of them now

Ranboo doesn't like photoshoots because he feels like everyone is staring at him, though this does mean he just doesn't have a passport photo, his alternative was to draw what he looked like on the passport but they didn't allow it, as well as Ranboo doesn't really remember what he looks like anyway because they don't like looking in mirrors--

I think this is half-canon but another headcanon is where every SMP is just an island far away from others. In this case, Hermitcraft, 30 day SMP, and other SMPs are all linked up, as for people who are in multiple SMPs, they travel around by boat for awhile, now, the thing I've just not figured out is how tf their look magically changes-like- outfit is decently obvious-- but do they magically transform like an anime girl? Idk- 

Skeppy's voice randomly glitches out, is there an actual reason for this? No.

Quackity’s outfit is similar to Sub Urban’s (In Freak)

Skeppy acts as if he is royalty, he doesn't act rude or demanding unless joking- but he does act as if he is the superior person-

-Skeppy and Slime are the only "people" that don't have steampunk styled clothing because of how old they are

-Skeppy's hair grows insanely quickly and no one knows why, he honestly hates it

-Most of Skeppy's outfits have been made by Bad or Puffy

-Skeppy knows DreamXD as if he is a brother, but he despises him because of something that has happened around 3,000 years ago

-Skeppy has a lot of different shades in their hair on the "inside"(like- the side where his neck is is what I mean, I don't remember if it has a name or not-)

-Like I've said before, Skeppy's eyes are crystallized, but they are somewhat transparent, not enough to where you'd be able to see the inside of his head, but they are still transparent

-In the past, Skeppy didn't like their name which is why they called himself "Skeppy"

-He has an attachment to caves

-When Skeppy was a kid, they had the dream of him filling cave walls with houses of their own

-Skeppy goes by it/they/he

-Skeppy joke flirts with Bad all the time to confuse everyone, Bad doesn't like it because then everyone thinks they are dating which makes him feel a little uncomfortable

-Out of boredom, in the past, Skeppy would climb on the roofs of caves, hang upside down, and try and sleep like a bat

-They have no blood in his body, it is literally just a diamond covered with a thin layer of skin and hair

-Skeppy gets stressed out easily when it comes to learning because it just reminds him of everything he had to get used to as the billion of years he lived went by

-Skeppy used to not be allowed out into the open world, the first time it experienced going outside was when it was 2 billion years old

-Skeppy has accidentally caught things on fire during the day because of the reflecting of the sun, but even then, they are nocturnal so they don't really have to worry about it

-Wilbur adapted to hanging out with Sally in the water, he has some gills, but he can only breathe underwater for a bit longer with them

-Skeppy always has the equivalent of Diamond (armor) except when he was infected by the egg, he was equivalent to the strength of a Ruby

-Infected Skeppy has a redstone glow when touched, so when hugged(or hive fived- or- yeah you get the point), he would give a subtle glow around him until let go

-The Eggpire still can be controlled, but they are able to control it unless angered/upset

-Skeppy was 6ft when infected, now he is 3′9 un-infected

-At this point, Dream likes the prison because he sometimes feels safe there, like no one can hurt him

-DristaXD is more of a ghost robot than an actual robot

-DristaXD's hobby is murdering people and has basically been in some sort of jail before, she has broken chains around their ankles and hands, it seems to have been made of a really strong material as wel

-Sapnap used to have fire wings, but when he had to get extinguished, they disappeared, they are still there, they just aren't visible until dunked in lava and Sapnap can't use them anymore

-Infected Bad still took care of Sapnap, but Sapnap never cared

-Sapnap takes the name "lava cake" too seriously... though he thinks the literal lava cakes he makes taste good

-Puffy's hair has been dyed blue by Ghostbur before because he wanted people to remember Friend if they ever disappeared

-Going with my Ghostbur as Callahan hc, when Ghostbur was killed, Callahan kind of glitched between realities and so Ghostburs body glitched from Callahan's body and Ghostbur's then just disappeared. Callahan is still alive but they randomly glitch into different realities, he has glitched into places Karl has gone, including The Inbetween.

-When Ghostbur was glitching back into Callahan after killed, it shocked and concerned Dream

There you go :]

[csmeaner]

how are people able to design cs myos im struggling rn i know how i want it to look like but im not motivated enough to draw it idk why maybe cuz the thing really does restrict your creativity. i had to rely on someone else to design it for me. i loved how it turned out but now i dont want it to be a cs anymore. its such a nice design on its own why tf do i need to slap a cs label on it??? considering rn to gift away my myo slots i can have my space kemonomimi w/o the brand name anyway

fuck yea once you realize you can draw whatever the hell you want instead of following bs cs rules it opens a whole new door

watching people be cs adopt designers is fucking like watching birds walk around with clipped wings it's fucking pitiful seeing this much skill be fucked over because of some invisible limitations

[stalksbyakuyatogami]

Hii,umm could i request how Yandere!Izuru react if his s/o tricked him and succesfully escape?like they make him believe that they actually live him and that but it was just to escape (how tf do you trick this man idk but y/n is hella smart)

Yandere Izuru Kamukura’s S/O Tricks Him and Luckily Escapes

This was a bit difficult but good thing ideas went in :))

•It's a rare occurrence that Kamukura makes you roam around.

•You've been close to him more than ever for one purpose.

•You've obeyed his every command, joke with him (which he rarely cracks a smile), never did anything highly suspicious.

•You knew that this man was so much smarter and wiser than you think so you did everything very carefully.

•And fit a reward for being good, he lets you roam around your room, finally free from the ropes that were burning your wrists and arms.

•From your duration at the place, you can almost feel when he's watching or not. And right now, he is and you decided to draw in the cement floor with a chalk he gave you.

•For some reason you kept writing 11037. You don't know, it just came to mind.

•For countless days, you did this routine. And sometimes you would ask him for something and he has to cross the other side of the house and you would take your time exploring every window and possible exit from your 2nd floor high room.

•He would find you awkwardly dancing that makes him rethink his decision. It's nothing though. It's a minor price for freedom.

•Finally, after 3 and a half weeks of being good and patient, the day arrived.

•The day where you would see the sunshine again. Hear the chirping of birds and inhale the smog of the city.

•He sensed something was wrong because you were more restless than usual so he decided to go to you.

•You started fiddling all the locks but it dawned on you that it would be useless. You found a perfectly weak spot of the glass window decided to ram it. It took four tries for you to penetrate though it.

•And when you did, you felt yourself grow warm, bathing in the sun's rays. It wasn't long until you landed on the grass. Breaking your arm.

•By the time Izuru arrived, he slammed the door in a hurry. He felt anger and disappointment when he knew he was seconds too late since you started running away from his place.

•Houses there were meters apart. He hoped that you hadn't gone far yet. •In your part, this was an enormous achievement. Getting out of that hellhole? Avoiding tortures? Stopped corny jokes? Hell yeah.

•Although he swore to himself that you'd be his. Forever. He'll always find you. Always.

•Did you really escape then?

This is hot not gonna lie.

-Mod Toko

the photo won’t load omfg

[sonybees]

me rewatching dead poets society instead of doing my assignments

i’m not sure if anyone would even care about this but i am really bored soo here we go

neil looks so down when he’s with his father stopdjejdkfjnr

poor todd got forced to stand up i would get pissed eujehd

the best preparatory school? lmfao ok.

KEATING YAY

THE PRESSURE THAT TODD HAS TO GO THROUGH I CAN SEE IT IN HIS EYES HE DOES NOT WANT THIS WTF

poor kids being forced to go there

LMFAO SPAZ

i still don’t know what a stiff means is that even what he said?

OOPS LMFAO

attractive pieces of sht leaning on a door frame help

“keen.” HA

YESSIR USJSJSJ

why does meeks kind of sound like me when i meet someone new

“he flatters me.” LOLSJNDKSHSJJSKSJDC

“i thought you’d gOne.”

freaking hell stfu tom

i’ve always thought this who calls their father “sir” ???

THE LOOK CHARLIE AND KNOX SHARE HDNEJDJF

“BRAIN DAMAGE” HSMEJD

they all look so confused like same

BRO SPAZ LMFAO

their smiles are so cute awwjdnejsnjd

POOR PITTS SHJWJS

MEEKS SMILE WHEN HE SAID AN UNFORTUNATE NAME

DING

“turn cold and die.” damn that took a turn fast

caaaaaarpeeeee dieeeeeem @siezethedaypoets (sorry! sjjejs)

“that means you daLtoN” the way he says it lfmaosjjd

i thought he was gonna do history he pulled out his chem book dhjshdbd

take a breath knox damn

them just not at all understanding math is a mood

too bad :/

AWW THE WXCITEMENT IN PITTS AND MEEKS EYES

“very funny, dalton.” hehehhehehejjdjdjfjrkdn ccmv mf

AWW MEEKS

CHARLIE WTF YOU DRAWING

RIP SHRED TEAR

RIP RIP RIP

oh shit

ahh one of my fav scenes, charlie basically eating that ball of paper

i hate looking at this it’s so awkward like hello mr. mccallister

what will your verse be?

THE MASHED POTATOS

“no, keating.” LMFAO YES GO KEATING

is that stick? on the end of the table?

“don’t come please.”

“no shIt, sherlock.” HA I LOVE THIS GUY

“pittsie, cmon!” “his grades are hurting, charlie.” i literally just love this conversation

“i’ll try anything once.” “except sex!” “ha ha ha.” HSJWJJSND ANOTHER ONE OF MY FAV CONVOS

“WOMEN SWOON HA HA HA” THE EVIL LAUGH WTF SHEJJS

“CHARLIE @tellmewhytheyswoon” SORRY I HAD TO LMFAO

LMFAO SHUT UP WILL YOU

this is so chaotic and messy damn

the treatshsjdj

they’re loud asf

i wonder who’s who while they were running with the hoods

OH CRAP THE SUN IS OUT WHAT that isn’t in the movie sorry

I LOVE MEEKS AND CHARLIE’S RELATIONSHIP SM

i could never take note of the minutes when something happens how will he do that

YESSIR PART TWO

HOW DID PITTS TAKE THE OTHER HALF SO FAST

EVEN TODD KNOWS CAMERONS STORY LMFAO

LMFOA KNOX IS STARING AT THE PICTURE

MEEKS HOOO THEN I SAW THE CONGO CREEPING THROUGH THE BLACK

THE LITTLE BOING NOISE LMFAO WHAT IS THAT

“are you a man or an amoeba?” i’m sorry lol what the hell do you mean sjdjiend

TO WOO WOMEN

“why do i stand up here? anybody?” “@tofeeltaller” HA I LOVE DOING THIS IM SORRY

i would cry if i found out that i had to make a poem AND read it aloud in front of everyone

poor todd thougsjwhidfj

i wanna marry todd. lmfao where did that come from

RADIO FREE AMERICA

AWW THEM DANCING STFU THIS IS SO CUTE

i can’t hear the audio hellloooooojdjwksbdken

AWW we got some anderperry content here

lol i wanna wear their sweaters

:/// TODD

“no.” “no? what do you mean no?” “no.” *smirks* HAJDJDJWKNS

DONT BE IMMATURE

IDK WHERE TF THE INSTRUMENTS CAME FROM BUT I LOVE IT

the birds are so pretty

nice outfit knox

STOP STARING DUDE YOU’RE MAKING IT TOO OBVIOUS CMON

“sounds to me like you’re daunted.” JSJS

TO INDEED BE A GOD

MEEKS AND PITTS WOTH THEIR HEADPHONES ON AWW

“PUCK YOU” LMFAOAJSJJDJ

i bet todd’s poem is actually great

“the cat sat on the mat.” DNDIDHJDJDJDHS i love how keating still said it wasn’t all bad though

BRO DAMN DONT CALL TODD AND I OUT LIKE THAT

lmfao todd’s just hating every second of this

“sweaty toothed madman” i can see that too whatsbjdjdjsn

THIS IS BETTER THAN ANY POEM I EVER TRIED TO WRITE GREAT JOB TODD

NEIL IS AMAZED

when keating pushed their foreheads together wtf aww father son love typa thing that’s so cutejjedujsidj

LMFOA NO KNOX TRIPPED

YAYY GOAL

wtf this seems so fun

“your parents collect pipes? oh that’s really interesting.” LFMAOOAJSJD I LOVE PITTS

poetrusic by charlie dalton

laughing crying mumbling tumbling

DAMN HES GOOD

the little kind of aggressive hair ruffle awwjendn

OOO VOCABULARY

LMFAO THE LITTLE CHUCKLE KNOX DOES

AWW THEYRE ALL SO HAPPY FOR KNOX

THE SCARFSJJD

“exercising my right not to walk.” smartass

it’s todd’s birthday and no one greeted him excpet neil stfukqbxqbcdbkrw

the first unmanned flying desk set yes yes

THEY ALL JUST STOOD UP LMFAO

merlin knox you are DRUNK

PLEASE DONT ISTG KNOX

THATS NOT WHAT HE MEANT BY CARPE DIEM

well you’re in deep trouble now

“it’s God. he says we should have girls at welton.” as much as i love this scene what the hell were you thinking my man

i don’t get how this was legal back then. wtf is it gonna do? you’re just hurting the kids bro

the pain in his eyes stop

“@dangitneil the name’s nuwanda.�� pain brokqdb jdjf

CRAP CRAP CRAP MR PERRY GET OUT

the pic of keating’s wife/gf aww

neil you’re gonna make me cry stop

that is so odd why are their lockers like connected from the left side isn’t it usually from the right?

JSKSIJDEIUWKDRUEJSJX CHRIS IS SO DONE NODKDMD

that piece of bread

THIS GUY JUST SHOVED A KID CMON KNOX

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOTHING?”

AWW WHEN TODD MESSED UO CAMERONS HAIR

CHARLIE LMFAO I MENA NUWANDA

KNOX IS DONE W THEM TOO

chris is gorgeous omg

the snow in her hair stop marry me

“you are SO infuriating”

i hate how i’m just completely forgetting what’s gonna happen in like 10 minutes

PUCK

LMFAOTHEM HOLDING DOWN CHARLIE

“he’s really good.” AW YES HE IS FUCSHWMDMD

wait the holding hands is kinda cute thoughsjdnd

bro mr perry is making me want to kill someone maybe him

NEIL’S SMILE IMMEDIATELY WENT AWAY IHATE YOU TOM

damnit you idiot i hate you sm let your son live you bastard

sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh sobs sobs sobs

merlin neil

IM JUST NOT GONNA THINK ABOUT THIS YK

HA HA HA NOT CRYING

SIGHS AGAIN

DEAR LORD

NO TODD IS GONNA MAKE ME CRY TOO STOP

THEY ALL SEEM LIKE THEYRE IN SHOCK NO

damn everything

SIGH WHY DIDNT I STOP WATCHING? IDFK

“it’s beautiful.” NOFNEJWGHSGEMWGE NEED WH

KEATING NO

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

charlie just sitting down not singing i hate this

i probably should’ve just stopped watching yk but i didn’t but that’s okay i think

i got so pissed the first time they said that they were gonna ask questions like??? did mr perry did no at all realize that it was his fault?

sigh cameron you aren’t always that bad but in this scene i loathe you

NO RICHARD

DAMNIT YOU MADE TODD SNAP

AND CHARLIE SNAPPED TOO YOU JUST MESSED UP TOO MUCH MAN

i hate how it went from a happy dark academia movie to this cmon

todd’s dad is so mean shut up he was just asking a question

it feels so sad in the room i hate it

the empty chairs pls no

keating’s little chuckle man i miss their smiles

BRO SROP THEY LOOK SO SAD TODD ISTG

*GASP OF HAPPINESS IN THE MIDDLE OF CRYING* HUHUHUH

TODD MEEKS STICK SPAZ PITTS KNOX GEORGE? HA I LOVE YALL

and we’re done. damn okay

thanks for reading ig fjdbshsbjwhdjsj

anyways i’m tired goodnight or morning or wtvr thanks! and sorry <3

[cattles-bians]

damie vibecca exes au part 8

post directory

obsetress: now i just want fanart of damvibecca at the gym

em: well. pitch it to me comrade ghostfucker

obsetress: idk that's about as far as i got i just reread that bit about vibecca in their matching gym outfits and my brain got stuck

em: hypothetically do u have a colour palette in mind bc i associate gym outfits w like. bright loud colours and

em: idk if it works w our earth sign queens

[em note: emily is a liar and did NOT draw fanart of damvibecca at the gym]

[em note 2: we have the gym art now [x] [x]]

obsetress: i was imagining like charcoals tbh, or jewel tones

obsetress: i could see them in like jewel tone purples or that jewel tone blue green color

obsetress: yeah viola jewel tones or blacks n charcoals

obsetress: becs pastels and camels but jewel tones at the gym

em: it’s about Matching

em: And Destroying Ur Ex (platonically)

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: viola's feeling particularly smug about it but then

obsetress: dani's in an old school tshirt and shorts and jamie's in............ one of dani's old school tshirts and shorts

em: YES

obsetress: not intentionally, she just grabbed whatever was there

obsetress: dani chirps "oh you two look so cute! baby look, they have a matched set"

obsetress: viola arches an eyebrow "and so do you, it seems" and dani laughs "not on purpose, jamie just grabbed whatever was on top in the drawer"

viola: you two... share... a wardrobe?

dani: yeah?

em: god cute

obsetress: cute n dumb

em: they can share nearly everything except pants

em: well. pants as a treat

em: haha pants

em: trousers

obsetress: also rly nice rly clean smooth funny juxtaposition in my brain of vibecca being the ones who intentionally match and damie the ones for whom it just accidentally happens

obsetress: hahahah pants

obsetress: they can share pants but................ should they

em: idk miss chapter 12 danis thighs jamies pyjamas

em: should they

obsetress: PLEASE

obsetress: that's exactly what i was referring to THANKS

obsetress: anyway

obsetress: rebecca just laughs

obsetress: viola huffs and bex is like "sorry, babe, but it is kind of funny"

em: dani jamie wearing like

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY

em: poor viola

obsetress: thinking about dani's ass in those

em: yeah....

em: violas huffing until jamies exercise flush lasts a little Too Long

obsetress: big blush jamie taylor

em: she’s still like ‘oi dani close ur mouth’ but then she

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: just ogling each other

obsetress: (they briefly pause to ogle vi and rebecca passing a medicine ball back and forth as they do squats and have to acknowledge that, yeah, they've all done alright by themselves)

em: funny montage of the gang doing exercise while surreptitiously taking Peaks

obsetress: omg all i want

obsetress:sometimes having friends as a lesbian means they're all your exes except one, who's your gf, and you're all checking each other out always anyway

em

And That’s Beautiful

obsetress

obsetress: dani: checking out viola's biceps, rebecca's abs

viola: checking out dani's thighs n ass

rebecca: minding her business

jamie: scowling n scrawny

obsetress:(n also checking out dani's thighs n ass, viola's biceps, and begrudgingly peeking at rebecca's abs)

obsetress: every other woman at the gym: checking out jamie, trying to figure out the entire dynamic here

are they a polycule? what

em: jamie probably like

em: maybe she gets really into running bc she just checks out and listens to her audiobooks but like

em: slow twitch vs fast twitch fibers so stays scrawny

obsetress: i can see that

obsetress: just gets on the treadmill and zones tf out

em: jamie ‘why don’t i have biceps’ taylor vs jamie ‘no u gotta lift w ur hips’ taylor

obsetress: she hates it but her psych told her it'll be good for her routine so you know she was like yes ma'am every day ma'am

em: cant believe safe lifting procedures screwed her over

em: ‘yes ma’am every day ma’am’ ur just Going for it arent ya anshdjdh

obsetress: sorry but don't tell me you can't hear it

obsetress: jamie's the person who takes notes in therapy

obsetress: jamie, in the locker room after their workout: do my biceps look bigger?

dani, patiently, already knowing where this is going: bigger than what, baby?

jamie: than yesterday

dani: mm, rome wasn't built in a day, you know

jamie: do they look bigger at all?

dani: well

em: i mean not to perceive her too much but mattresses scene indicates AE/jamie like. at least some muscle in the leg area

em: poor jamie

em: not playing to her strengths

obsetress: yeah she does

obsetress: i mean ae has toned af arms

obsetress: she's just wiry

em: how could i forget the benchpressing dog gif

obsetress: dani's like "jamie, baby, come do squats with me and vi" "m'good" "baby, c'mon, you'll like it" "don't wanna do squats" "it could be good for you" "don't wanna do squats with you two"

em: dani: you gotta like. eat more

jamie: i eat plenty

dani: no u graze all day and then u don’t eat dinner

obsetress: dani: five biscuits spread out across a day doesn't count as eating more

em: dani: protein jamie it’s abt protein

obsetress: dani: you need more protein, which is why i think some lentils would really––

em: jamie thinks protein shakes are Nasty

obsetress: jamie does think protein shakes are nasty but dani will make her a smoothie and sneak it in like she's a child

obsetress: viola and rebecca, with their matching monogrammed blender bottles, just staring

obsetress: becca's like "jamie, just drink it, really, it's fine"

obsetress: viola just does this haughty sniff at her and that's what finally gets jamie to start

em: jamie can deal w being a brat but the idea of viola having Anything over her drives her Insane

em: Drives Her Fuckign Nuts

obsetress: she hates it

obsetress: just the absolute fuckin worst

em: do u think dani ever like

em: like they REALLY need to clear out storage but it’s a boiling frog situation where it’s increased so gradually that

em: like jamie thinks it’s Fine storage is Clear Enough

em: it’s Not

em: danis like. should we invite rebecca and vi over

em: just be Idea of A Snide Viola Comment fills jamie w a burning rage

obsetress: oh my god

obsetress: i'm obsessed with this

obsetress: i would read a whole oneshot about this

em: eventually dani comes clean abt it n jamie thinks it’s v funny bc yknow; open and honest communication is a v important part of their dynamic

em: jamie: next time just tell me my storage looks like shite dani or i will be grumbling abt viola for a Week

obsetress: inevitably

obsetress: when they do have to come over to clean

obsetress: dani offers them takeout and wine ("step up from pizza and beer at least," jamie grumbles) and viola's like "jesus, dani, let's just go out to dinner. my treat"

obsetress: at dinner, viola's like "if you want more storage, i have some wonderful properties––"

obsetress: rebecca's mouthing "sorry" from next to her across the table

em: every time they go out rebecca takes vi aside n is like ok sweetheart so you promise you’re not gonna try convince them to sell the apartment again

em: and violas like (mock horror) of course i won’t. ye of little faith

em: and every time

em: every time she does

em: she’s tryna HELP

obsetress: she would too she'd be like

obsetress: "i'm just trying to HELP"

obsetress: "they're our FRIENDS"

em: i’m on a mission to figure out like

em: this is way way down the line

em: but i wanna believe eventually viola and jamie start to, at the v least, Tolerate each other

em: jamie might even be fond of the crazy bird but she’ll NEVER admit it

obsetress: god like vi's on business or some shit in like

obsetress: the UAE

obsetress: negotiating some Deal

obsetress: and so dani and jamie get dinner with just bex and they're driving home after and having a perfectly mundane conversation and then jamie's just blurting like

obsetress: "i think i miss vi"

em: she’s HORRIFIED

em: she tries to play it off as like um

em: she’s Too Comfortable

em: things are Too Boring

em: which is weird knowing everything we know abt jamie

em: but actually she just... maybe misses viola

em: danis like god i wish i was recording this

obsetress: jamie's passed out next to her at home later (it's ten pm) and dani's chattering happily away on the phone with vi (drinking a martini in her dubai hotel room at one am since, y'know, no bars) in bed right next to her

obsetress: "jamie, uh, said she misses you. i know. no, i KNOW. don't tell her i told you. yeah, yeah, you win, vi, we know. uh-huh. uh-huh. i'm gonna pretend you didn't just ask me that"

em: CUTE

em: u can’t lord it over her vi it’s a little secret

em: vi's like when have i EVER

em: she does

obsetress: once they're good again, dani and vi absolutely just. lose time (there's a metaphor in there) talking to each other still

em: this is wholesome tbh

em: i really like the damie stories where like

em: look it’s nice when damie have each other but it’s also nice when they have their own friends and stuff

em: dunno how to articulate that well

em: it’s a balance! it’s a balance

obsetress: yeah! exactly

obsetress: because that's part of the love n possession thing too yk

obsetress: not to say either of them would ever be like "no friends for you" but

obsetress: wanting to have a life outside of your partner yk

obsetress: they're meeting vi and rebecca for dinner after vi gets back and vi's just grinning and sweeping jamie into a hug "i heard you missed me"

em: she gets jamie a souvenir t-shirt

em: it’s too big

em: OR

em: child’s t-shirt

obsetress: (jamie sleeps in it that night)

obsetress: oh childs might be better

obsetress: she's like "you're a little scrawny, so..."

em: jamie sleeps in it.... soft bitch

em: she feels too much

obsetress: jamie taylor softest bitch

obsetress: dani watches her pull it on and raises an eyebrow and jamie's just like "wot"

em: jamies like (grumbles) i knew she was comin back i’m just

em: shouldn’t you be HAPPY about this development dani

em: ‘s’a gift... s’rude not t’....’

obsetress: YEAH

obsetress: dani just grins "mmhm"

em: it accidentally makes its way into jamies workout clothes pile

obsetress: oh my GOD oh my god

obsetress: viola's shit eating GRIN when jamie shows up at the gym in it

em: jamies like fok

em: mental maths tryna figure if she wants to just. work out in a sports bra

em: she Doesn’t

obsetress: she Doesn't!

obsetress: (she's shy)

em: god it’s one of those shirts that’s like

em: someone who loves me went to UAE and got me this t-shirt or something

obsetress: dani corners her in their empty row in the locker room "you could've just taken it off, you know" "dunno, not everyone needs to... see that, you know?" "i'd certainly like to see it" jamie rolls her eyes but she's grinning "you can see that any time" "well maybe i wanted to see it during my workout" "dani......."

em: jamies embarrassed bc of her gnarly farmers tan means her tummy is at least five shades lighter than the rest of her

em: crisp tan lines

obsetress: god jamie's farmers tan

em: once again i am bringing my tan lines jamie agenda

obsetress: dani loves jamies dumb farmers tan so much

obsetress: she giggles

obsetress: but it's the most loving giggle possible

em: and then when she gets into running...

em: god when i was rowing there were a couple ppl w like what i called a neapolitan icecream tan which is

em: gimme a second

obsetress: jamie gets all huffy when dani giggles at her tan but then dani's like "baby, no, i think it's cute" and jamie gives her a look and dani grins mischievously and ducks her head

obsetress: and then she's licking and kissing and nipping her way along jamie's dumb tan lines

em: there it is

obsetress: it was inevitable

em: so caught up in the joy of jamies dumb farmer tans i forgot abt her gnarly scar she keeps under wraps

em: baby

em: the most baby

obsetress: baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

em: jamie decides the only way to claim the stupid t-shirt as hers is to cut off the sleeves

em: it’s abt the ritual of the thing

obsetress: she shows up at the gym wearing it and

obsetress: that's viola's "oh no she's hot" moment

em: YEAH BABY

obsetress: literally just like

obsetress: world stops

obsetress: viola stares

em: jamie finally gets to do an exercise that shows off her sinewy manual labor grip forearms

em: viola’s probably just as horrified to find jamie hot as every time jamies like oh no

em: violas hot

em: and once again jamie CANNOT know she’s hot bc she will be insufferable

em: she will be the Worst

obsetress: viola's tugging rebecca aside "why didn't you tell me jamie was hot" "what?" viola waves a hand and rebecca just furrows her brow a little and is like "that's just... what she looks like, vi"

obsetress: viola corners dani next "why didn't you tell me jamie was hot" "i did" "oh. right" viola pauses, then "why didn't you make sure i was listening?" dani just gives her a look and walks away

obsetress: dflksdjfldaj god the way jamie and viola are. the same

obsetress: kind of incredibly, in the same ways dani and rebecca are the same

em: “hey baby, did viola seem different today? seemed off”

em: jamies like. is she mad at me. did i break another social taboo.

em: rebecca ‘jamie looks like jamie’ jessel vs dani ‘my gf is so hot i can’t stand it’ clayton

obsetress: "i tell you how hot she is at least three times a week, vi"

em: danis tryna goad her into making the damn shirt a crop top

em: jamies like yeah but isn’t that a step too far. i feel like i am destroying this shirt too much

em: she does it anyway

em: so jamies workout clothes are danis endless grey baggy school t-shirts and this one ugly souvenir shirt that like

em: psychological warfare and she doesn’t even know it

obsetress: i would........ like to see it

obsetress: also crop top jamie is one of my favorite jamies

obsetress: she is severely underrated

em: crop top jamie is

obsetress: and we do not talk about her enough

em: jamie wear More crop tops

obsetress: viola and rebecca in bed, in matching facemasks, after going to the gym post-epiphany that Jamie Is Hot

obsetress: viola: are dani and jamie hotter than us?

rebecca: what?

obsetress: and like

obsetress: viola is NOT insecure

obsetress: she is constantly confident that she's the most attractive woman in the room at any given moment, but

obsetress: she's just so staggered by this realization

em: some neutral third party (ms grose and mr sharma probably) are like well. u guys definitely have a little more of a scary thing going on

em: i’m imagining rebecca and viola at brunch w hannah and owen v seriously discussing this

em: viola brings it up and rebecca GROANS but then she gets invested in the convo

obsetress: GOD yeah

obsetress: she's leaning forward and gesturing with her fork "when you say 'scary'..........."

em: owens like scary is a compliment

em: hannah grose sips her tea knowingly

obsetress: rebecca just narrows her eyes at hannah grose and hannah raises her eyebrows and shrugs

em: after a week or so viola bursts into a room w stupid big sunglasses and a tray of take out coffees and she’s like Don’t You Worry Jamie I Have Concluded You’re Hot But I’m Not Threatened By It

em: jamies like sorry WHAT

em: you’ve been thinking about WHAT

em: viola leaves without ever following it up

obsetress: dani is entirely unfazed

obsetress: doesn't even blink

em: danis like neat she remembered the oat milk

em: everyone in this au is insane

obsetress: any lesbian in 2021 is insane

obsetress: par for the course

em: was gonna protest but

em: Yeah

obsetress: this lesbian meme account i follow on insta is doing “stop asking who’s the top and who’s the bottom. start asking...” posts

obsetress: and one of them is “start asking who’s baby and who’s fuck around and find out” and it just makes me chuckle

obsetress: jamie taylor baby

obsetress: viola lloyd also baby

em: dani is baby passing and jamie is fuck around faking

obsetress: oh my god that’s why that’s why i think we cracked it

obsetress: dani (fuck around) dated jamie (baby) and vi (baby)

obsetress: rebecca (fuck around) dated jamie (baby) and vi (baby)

obsetress: the reason they could never cross further even tho per the transitive property dani (so similar to vi) should be able to date beccs and jamie (so similar to beccs) should be able to date vi is because

obsetress: you can’t have two babies and two fuck arounds in a relationship together

em: oh of course. i see. i see

em: however in the rare rare crack ship of the ‘jamie viola hatefuck’ a similar phenomenon to ‘social anxiety mum friend ordering food’ instinct takes over and someone fucks around and finds out

em: this is just my unhinged jamie viola hatefuck bulkshit which is. it’s ironic ok it’s ironic it’s ironic it’s

em: ok one last thought bc i know it’s super late for u but

obsetress: omg i also have a last thought let’s trade

em: what if mikey is about isabels age n jamie ends up looking after him for one reason or another for a bit

em: and viola absolutely Dotes on him

obsetress: omg

obsetress: that’s what does it. jamie seeing viola w mikey

em: grumble grumble i guess she’s not that bad

em: except then she’s like god what if mikey likes her MORE than me

obsetress: “dani what if mikey gets one of those weird first crushes on vi”

obsetress: dani doesn’t even look up from the laundry “who hasn’t had a crush on vi”

obsetress: jamie’s like “mE” and dani just gives her the most withering look

em: danis like It’s Par For The Course Jamie

em: danis a teacher she’s like it happens don’t sweat it

em: anyway

em: what was. what was ur last little thought

obsetress: i was just thinking more about viola also baby and how also she’s been so privileged her whole life that sometimes there are just some things she can’t do for herself because she just doesn’t know how

obsetress: like she’s never had to learn

em: rebecca gets um

em: freeze dried coffee

em: nescafé

obsetress: but like

obsetress: rebecca genuinely loves taking care of vi for whatever reason (it’s because she loves her) when she really needs it but

obsetress: rebecca also takes no shit and is like “i’m not making the nescafé for you. you’re 36 years old, vi, you need to learn to do it for yourself”

obsetress: and she’ll stand there and watch her do it and then she makes vi do it at least three more times for posterity

obsetress: “i’ll make a plebeian of you yet, viola lloyd”

obsetress: (god only the two of them would think a line like that is funny)

[willowistic22]

Soon You’ll Get Better (Redfinch)

It was four months ago when his world burned into flaming embers. But after some time, he’s starting to heal from all the pain. And so, his mind starts screaming the same question in a million different ways which all hurt him like knife cuts from different angles : How could he? 

Words : 3682

Part : - 

Warnings : Death, grief, hospitals 

A/N : Abt damn time I post a fanfic huh?? hehe i set a 2 fanfic a month goal for myself to keep the momentum going, so that would kinda explain it. Anyways here a fanfic. Inspired by a post I made a while ago the post is long gone idk where tf it is anymore now and there are elements of Taylor Swift’s ‘Soon You’ll Get Better’ but it’s not a songfic bcs in the fic the song is used as a song Albert wrote. Just read the fic and you’ll get it! Enjoy!!!

@fifty-for-the-racer since you were really passionate abt this idea, this one’s for you <3 

Walking through the hallway of his college dorm, backpack on his shoulder while clutching a few books he brought to class close to his chest. It’s full of other college students minding their own business. But they’re loud and fast, while Albert is slow and quiet. His mind is the one going at a fast pace. 

The weight and hollow feeling he has grown used to since four months ago doesn’t feel the same way as before. It doesn’t hurt as much. And somehow it felt wrong that he is moving on. He couldn’t move on. How could he?

His brain gets louder and louder with all these new thoughts that he’s been developing lately. As if the loud noises of fast paced college students isn’t enough to make him suffer. Albert lets out a deep sigh as the sight of his own dorm slowly comes to view. He can get some peace of mind for the time being since his roommate still has a class at this hour.

Albert slowly opens the wooden door but stops in the middle of his tracks upon his new discovery.

“I didn’t— I wasn’t— Race let me in before he left for class!” A boy, that obviously doesn’t belong here, sits on Albert’s bed with a few of his messy clothes on his lap. The boy stands up to approach him while frantically moving the clothes away from him, “I didn’t mean to snoop around your stuff, I swear! Your clothes were just- they were a mess and I thought I could fold it—“

“Woah, calm down there, Finch” Albert cut him off, closing the door behind him before he takes a few steps closer to the worried looking blond boy, “You know I trust you with my stuff”

He lets out a deep breath upon hearing those words, “I know, but… I never asked for permission”

Finch’s eyes meet Albert’s, blue and hazel orbs locked in a soft gaze. He sighs out, “I’m sorry”

Albert simply chuckles through his small smile, dropping his bag onto his desk along with the black snapback he’s been wearing all day which reveals his bright red hair in a messy floof, “No need to be sorry. Besides, I really need to start cleaning up”

Finch chuckles at that, dropping his guarded shoulders down. Wordlessly, Albert starts picking up his clothes. Separating them to two big piles on the bed, one dirty pile and another clean one for him to fold and put back to his closet. Finch hesitated on approaching to help. But after the redhead flashes him a warm smile over his shoulder, Finch gladly skips next to him to help.

For the most part, they don’t talk. Finch isn’t sure if he should, not that he’d know what to talk about anyways. But he doesn’t mind it. They could still hear other college students through the walls as it isn’t that thick. And the birds chirping outside makes its way through the single window next to Al’s bed, along with the rays of light coming from the afternoon sun.

“I’d hear an earful from mom if she ever finds out that my dorm is messy” Albert finally broke the silence upon feeling the little tension from the other boy next to him.

Finch steals a small glance to his side, a little surprise with the topic he chose to speak up about. But he doesn’t complain. If this is how Albert mourns, then he’s willing to help.

“Yeah?” Finch asked softly, stacking a clean pair of pants he just folded to a clean pile of other pants.

“Yeah” Albert replied, eyes still glued to his task of separating his clothes. He can feel a little smile makes its way on his face, “She’d tell me to put them back in my closet as soon as it's clean so I won’t forget”

By now, all the out of placed clothes are picked up since Finch had already started beforehand. The wooden floor and the rest of the furniture in his dorm are free from Albert’s clothes. He reaches for the drawer under his bed to grab the laundry bag.

“But… I always end up either forgetting or procrastinating” Albert smiled to himself with a chuckle as he rose up to put the dirty clothes in the laundry bag.

Finch laughs along with him, glad to see him smile while he talks about his mother. It’s been some time since he last saw it. He’s glad there’s progress being made.

It didn’t take long to put the dirty clothes in the laundry bag. He carelessly tosses the bag to a forgotten corner of his dorm, turning to face the neatly folded clothes on his bed so he can organize it in his closet. His focus however, caught on to a strange sound that came from the corner where he threw the laundry bag. A loud thud between a hard solid object with a mixture of unorganized notes originating from strings.

The two boys flip their heads towards said corner, on the remaining space between the wall and the edge of Albert’s bed. There, lay a dusty guitar leaning against the corner created by the wall. The light brown of the wood reflects the minimal rays of sunshine that reached that forgotten corner, making it more majestic than it actually is.

“You didn’t tell me you brought your guitar here!” Finch exclaimed upon taking note of the guitar’s presence. An exciting energy buzzing through his veins all of a sudden. Everyone could instantly tell from the way his blue eyes lit up and his lips splitting into a smile.

“Didn’t thought it’d matter” Albert replied with a little chuckle. He watches as Finch gets his hands on the instrument, all while putting his clothes back in his closet.

The moment Finch gets his hands on the guitar, he puts it on his lap and sits down on the now spacious mattress. The spring bounces up and down with the weight of the blond boy and his new discovery. He starts to lightly pluck the strings, creating a lovely tune while waiting for Albert to finish up cleaning.

As the last item is placed back to its rightful place in Al’s closet, he closes the doors and turns to Finch. He’s still busy getting entertained by the guitar to notice the warm smile creeping its way to Al’s face.

Though, he doesn’t linger in the gaze. Seeing that he’s been wearing the same outfit for the whole day, he decides to slip into some warm sweatpants and a clean t-shirt.

“When did you brought it here?” Finch asked, eyes gleaming at the sight of a freshly dressed Albert walking towards him on the bed. His finger still mindlessly strumming the guitar, the same soft melody still echoes around the dorm.

“After like, what, two and a half months maybe? Dad decided to do some cleaning” Albert explained, ruffling his bright red locks with a hand, “I found this guitar after forgetting about it for a while and decided to keep it. It kept me busy for the most part”

The pair moves to lay down on the bed together. It’s technically too small to fit two people but neither boys mind cuddling towards each other.

Albert takes charge of the guitar while Finch gets comfortable lying next to him. Arms slightly wrapping his shoulders with his head tucked warmly in the crook of Al’s neck. Finch’s small blond curls slightly brush against the coarse skin of the other boy, almost as softly as Albert’s own fingers strumming his guitar.

“Turns out mom had always kept it” Albert suddenly spoke up, soft yet still deep. Finch looks up as best as he can to meet his eyes, though the boy doesn’t seem to be making any efforts on trying to do the same. His eyes turned blue, looking down at the strings he’s strumming, “At first I thought she threw it away since I wouldn’t be needing it for college. But I found it in her closet one time when I had to pick something up for her”

Albert plucks one last string of his guitar before stopping the tune, he let’s the last note resonate around the room. A long drawn out sigh leaves his nose, the aura of this dorm drooping along with his sadness.

Finch looks up to study his face. Hazel eyes clouded with a secret rainstorm behind it. Lips still smiling, but it was cracked by the thunderous thoughts that are now occupying his head.

“Hey, you okay?” Finch dared to whisper. It might be a bad idea, but it’s the only thing he could do right now.

Albert doesn’t answer. He seems to still be lost in whatever is running around in his head.

To which, Finch continues, “It’s okay to be sad, Al. I know you miss her”

“Yeah. I miss her a lot” Albert finally replied. He shifts his head down towards where Finch is already looking up at him, “But I don’t know. Lately it… it doesn’t hurt as much as it first did”

The other boy could only tilt his head to the side with a question mark drawing the lines of his face. Albert just smiles down at the face and chuckles at the cuteness before continuing, “I still miss her but… It’s getting easier to move on. And I know it’s supposed to be a good thing but… I feel kinda guilty ‘bout it”

Finch softens his face at the explanation, offering a comforting smile. He cuddles closer to Albert, which was received with open arms. Al slightly pushes away his guitar to let Finch cozy up next to him a little further. Once they find a comfortable position, they take in the smell of each other and then let it out with one huge sigh.

“It does make you feel guilty if you start feeling like moving on from someone’s death” Finch acknowledged Albert's previous words, gentle and slow, “But nothing in this world would ever make you forget about your mother. I can promise you that”

The redhead snorts out a little laughter, “You sound like my therapist”

Finch, not knowing how to respond to that, laughs along with him. Which only makes Albert tighten his hug around the boy.

“You’ll get through this. I know you will” Finch said, after pondering about his next words for a minute. It was only replied by a squeeze to one of Finch’s hands but he knew it was a way to appreciate his words without verbally saying it.

“Y’know…” Albert suddenly began after a few moments of silence, gently pushing Finch away from the hug so he could sit up on the bed properly. He sits slightly on the end of the bed, opposing Finch so they’re now face to face without needing to turn their heads. He props his guitar on his lap again and looks down to the other boy, “... I uhh… I wrote a song while she was in the hospital. Hoping she’d get better”

Sensing a little private performance coming up, Finch excitedly sits up along with him. Legs tucked in close to his chest, letting his hands rest on his knees. A hopeful smile rests on his face, shining as bright as day.

It makes Albert giggle a little while his fingers start to softly strum the guitar again. It’s a different tune from before, but this one doesn’t sound like something he made up in the moment. It has a pattern to it, soft and comforting.

“I wrote it in the summer after our high school graduation. It’s called… ‘Soon You’ll get better’” Albert explained, looking down to the vibrating strings, “Mom really liked it when she first heard it. She always asked me to sing it any time I visit her in the hospital” 

“And… you’re gonna sing it to me now?” Finch asked hopefully, getting impatient from the absence of his boyfriend’s vocals.

Albert chuckles at it, but nods along to answer his question. To which, Finch settles in his seat and waits for Albert to start singing.

“The buttons of my coat were, tangled in my hair

In doctor's-office-lighting, I didn't tell you I was scared”

He keeps his eyes glued down to the strings. Finch isn’t sure if he’s doing this on purpose, but he won’t question it. It’s a song that stuck pretty close to Albert’s heart it seems, and for a good reason too.

“That was the first time we were there

Holy orange bottles, each night I pray to you

Desperate people find faith, so now I pray to Jesus too”

His voice is nasally but still strong and sweet as honey. Finch was captivated by the deep baritenor vocals, slipping out of reality with every gentle note echoing around the dorm. Unknowingly, a smile spread across his face as the song progressed.

“And I say to you

Ooh-ah, soon you'll get better

Ooh-ah, soon you'll get better

Ooh-ah, you'll get better soon”

Briefly, Albert drags his eyes up to Finch. A sad kind of happiness paints his face and Finch could only reply with the same look on his face.

“'Cause you have to”

Every word he wrote in the song made him sound so vulnerable, something not many people get to witness. Every sad lyric he wrote sounds like a rain parade sent from hell. The same feeling he felt when his father called him to get to the hospital as quickly as possible to say one goodbye to his mother.

Finch remembers that day too. The couple were with some of their other friends on a night out. When the phone rang, Albert had a bad feeling because the last time he went to the hospital his mother looked worse than before. Nonetheless, he still picked it up and it sucked the joy right out of him. Albert had to ask Finch to come with him. No one wanted to know what he would’ve done if the poor boy walked there on his own.

Mr. DaSilva, his two older brothers along with their wives and Albert’s only niece from his oldest brother had said their misty goodbyes. It left their eyes so watery, they couldn’t recognize Albert running in the room. A woman laid helplessly on the hospital bed, skin too pale for her own good and the same red locks she and her three sons share fully shaved off her head. Their other relatives aren’t here which Albert had assumed was because they’re still on their way. But that didn’t matter. What mattered was saying goodbye to his beloved mother.

She still had the energy to smile at Albert and Finch when they first stepped in the room. Albert had knelt down next to her, taking his mother’s hand and soaking up any warmth left in the palms which was next to zero. They had exchanged words in whispers, and by the time Albert got up to hug her the water starts staining her clothes.

“And I hate to make this all about me

But who am I supposed to talk to?

What am I supposed to do

If there's no you?”

The song was meant to be a get-well-soon prayer for his mother. Albert had his doubts that this time she’d make it out alive since it’s the third time her cancer came back. And for a while, he believed that she would. She had always been a fighter and she did fight like hell at the start of it, saying that she wanted to see Albert graduate college.

Of course, the universe had its own plans. She was too weak to fight any harder and thought that it was enough. As much as Albert hated it, he still had to let her go when the heart monitor stopped beating. The long ringing noise was so deafening, it pierced like dagger right through his eardrums.

As the doctors and nurses took over to do their jobs, the family mourned her death. The pain from every teardrop felt like a stab to the heart. It kept on feeling like that for some time after her funeral as they mourn in their own different ways.

“This won't go back to normal, if it ever was

It's been years of hoping, and I keep saying it because

'Cause I have to”

Albert was lucky he had all his friends to be there by his side as support. Giving him the necessary space any time he needs it, a shoulder to cry on when he needs it, giving him their therapists’ contact number when he asked, or welcoming him back to the group when he feels like going out with them. Overall, they’re the most amazing friends Albert could’ve asked for.

At first it was hard to keep up with how fast the world is spinning. But Albert soon relearned the pace and slowly healed from the pain. And that’s his new problem. The term ‘healing’ in this kind of situation felt so wrong, to use and to do. Albert feels guilty for trying to feel normal after his mother’s death, because it’s obvious nothing is normal. 

Take the rest of his family for example : they used to have family dinners every month in the DaSilva household. Albert, his brothers, sister in-laws, his only niece, and both parents. Four months after the funeral they haven’t had their monthly family dinners. Maybe it was for the best. His father didn’t even seem okay when he was cleaning out his wife's stuff.

“Ooh-ah, soon you'll get better

Ooh-ah, soon you'll get better

Ooh-ah, you'll get better soon

'Cause you have to”

Strumming the last few notes of the song, Albert could feel the water forming in his eyes again. He ignores it till he strums the last chord. Bringing his gaze back up to meet Finch’s, he can tell the other boy noticing the little drops of water threatening to trickle down his cheeks.

They stayed silent for a few seconds, Albert waiting for the little wave of sadness to properly sit while he puts down his guitar on the floor and Finch waiting for a cue to do something.

“She always liked it when I sing it to her” Albert exclaimed, trying to play it cool while he wipes his tears away, “I don’t think you’ve heard it before”

“No, I haven't,” Finch replied. He shifts closer to Albert to help him wipe his tears away with the sleeves of the hoodie he’s currently wearing. After it dried, Finch’s hands cupped his cheeks gently and he whispers, “But it was very lovely. I love it”

To that, Albert smiles. It made Finch smile along as well. But he knows better not to mistake that smile for happiness.

“Thanks for stopping by, Finch” Albert finally said, “I really needed it”

Finch smiles, letting out a little sigh, “Glad I could help”

He leans his head closer to Albert. Sensing a kiss coming up, Albert does the same and their lips meet halfway. Softly brushing against each other while their eyes closed to focus on the warm feeling. Albert gently holds one of Finch’s hands on his cheek with his own as the kiss deepened, still gentle and loving.

A jingling noise followed by loud chattering and laughter coming from the other side of the door got them to pull apart quickly. In storms, the door opens and a tall messy looking figure enters the room still packed with energy and excitement.

“Oh! Uhh… I didn’t know there was a date scheduled here!” Race exclaimed, freezing like a deer caught by headlights in the middle of the room when he noticed his roommate already had his own company.

The two boys looked past him and saw a bunch of their other friends standing in the doorway, waiting for a cue to enter the dorm. They wave at each other politely, all while Finch slowly backs away from his boyfriend. It made the group chuckle, and the couple a bit embarrassed. 

“Yeah, uhh…” Race awkwardly said, scratching the back of his head, “...We were about to have a game of poker here—but it’s cool! We can go somewhere else—“

“Nah, it’s okay, Racer!” Albert exclaimed, swinging his legs down the bed. He approaches the door where his friends are still waiting around, greeting them with a big smile, “You guys comin’ in or what?”

To which they all laughed, happily piling in the dorm. They simply put their stuff on an empty space in the floor before they make their way to where Race was already sitting on the floor.

“You playin’, Al?” One friend called out, Romeo.

“Yeah, deal me in” Albert replied, closing the door after waiting for all of his friends to pile in. He trails behind the last friend, Crutchie, towards the little circle his friends had made.

“Last time I was here the floor was covered with your clothes, Al” Crutchie observed the dorm while he slowly lowered himself to the floor in between Finch and Romeo, “Did you finally pick them up?”

Albert sits himself down next to Finch, exchanging a laugh with the other boy before answering, “Yeah, Finch came by to help”

“Took you long enough!” Race joked, still busy prepping the game for the others. Everyone laughed at it, all while Al reached his hands out to playfully smack his knee.

“Alright, alright, that’s enough” Jack stopped the two, growing impatient with the inevitable poker game, “Let’s get this game going!”

So now he’s playing a game with his friends like normal. Of course, the conversation he just had with Finch still lingered in his mind. Of how much he misses his mother and how guilty he feels for trying to move on. But the promises Finch made gave him a little glimmer of light. It’s not something he can technically promise, but it’s definitely something to hope for. With a glance shot towards his boyfriend next to him, which was replied with a soft gaze from Finch himself, he knows that everything will turn out alright eventually. 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

some genius pt Musings i’ve been having this time around

1) the question of “is mytho’s hair white just from unknown decades of Time Passage within the paused story, like, his hair pigmentation Aged but nothing else lol” or “That, but his hair is white from the stress” (it’s that one lol. plus fr why would only his hair change due to Time) but i wanna introduce a Third Element: i think we can suppose in-the-story tutu’s appearance / disappearance happens just before or v shortly before the interrupted non-ending of prinz und rabe, and it sure seems like some or all or some Version of tutu’s Essence & part of the prince’s heart are like, truly Merged, and what if it’s that the prince got white hair from That b/c it was more swan-esque. a la the white feathery part of ahiru-tutu’s (& that one design of seemingly-prinz-und-rabe tutu)’s hair

2) again w/the matter of how at least part of Original Tutu seems to exist on in the prince’s physical heart: there’s the brief mention that fakir and mytho dance b/c Mytho Likes To Dance, which like, would be one of those Traits that transcends his emotions, like how he protects everything (so does tutu? emotionally? while the prince protects everyone physically (against a Metaphor for Despair so is that not also, in a way, emotionally too) like thank you power couple) but there’s also the brief mention that tutu is a Spirit Of Dance maybe so it’s like, again, did tutu becoming part of mytho pass something along in that way which imbues him with that proclivity to dance (although you’ve also got neko-sensei saying his dancing was not that Emotional earlier, which makes sense, but also seems like tutu protecting Feelings happens via dance. by “seems” i mean “this is a key aspect of literally every part of this series” s/o to me) or on another note: maybe drosselmeyer just wrote prinz und rabe For Adaptation lmfao. he was like “fuck yes they’re gonna make this into a ballet.” what with this series’ implication that like....the nutcracker is one of his stories where he just so happens to have a full self-insert who textually uses that power to make stories become reality. and that sure is a ballet. and from looking it up just now i’m learning that it was Based on a preexisting story, and, reading the wikipedia summary, i’m also remembering i’ve read an adapted-into-another-book version of this story, and it sure has another layer of “story interwoven with / becoming Reality” to it. anyways my point is i suppose, Watsonianly Speaking, prinz und rabe involving Ballet could’ve been Written Into It throughout all the characters, or maybe it’s just tutu who dances, which then becomes part of mytho’s character when her sacrifice like, bonds (part of? all? whomst can say) her to his heart. bless. doylean reason is this is a series about ballet and stuff

3) Another Briefly Mentioned thing when mytho talks about how he apparently could just naturally draw birds to him. and ahiru having that happen in the first episode/s is like, could be b/c she’s a bird or could be because she has part of the prince’s heart, as is emphasized like, immediately during the Bird Visit in ep 1. so i just had the thought like, a duck who cares about mytho gets to become tutu, but what if it was any other bird, surely it Could be. that fledgling canary he’s saving in episode 1 gets to become tutu mid-fall

4) i had some other Thought and i’ve forgotten it. well in the meantime thinking about how everyone dunks on Prinz Und Rabe Textual Lohengrin as the useless loser failure knight lmaooo but then like, that was just re: the One mentioned fatal raven encounter & also specifically about that lohengrin can’t protect the prince with his sword. but like, sure Behearted Mytho can probably exercise a little more discretion in risking his life to save whatever needs protecting, vs unsupervised heartless mytho diving out of windows, but can we really suppose he was That much more careful about staying safe vs impulsively throwing himself into a situation to save something at all costs. how much work did lohengrin do simply making sure the prince didn’t die in that sort of way. thank you lohengrin

5) oh right. i was thinking about Magic i think. s/o to the person who had the idea that when tutu sacrificed herself and turned into Light she might’ve merged with Good Magic in the story’s world, which the prince also had access to, and that’s how she kind of literally becomes part of him / they share powers / they share their Swan / Dance visual themes & stuff. & i was sure at one point wondering about the Forbidden But Granted Only To The Prince (own...?)-heart-shattering ability, like, maybe at some point an implicitly more specific verb was used like “taught,” or did the prince simply just Have the power by virtue of being the prince, or did it like, come from tutu who has the tie to the prince & Loved him & has those abilities to protect people’s Feelings, although maybe that’s just like, a choice and not inherently part of the magic lol. and then the Real World Magic we see is just like, inherited. but wait then there’s that bridge & ghosts & stuff, although there’s Stories about those too apparently. nvm this one’s really vague i’m just wondering if the Prince alone has that heartshattering Magic Technique through tutu or what. could be anything

6) but no really i think i had some other Thought, i’m sure it was great & ig i’ll reblog if it reoccurs to me, but i got distracted down another mental track so, you know, rip. in the meantime just thinking like, i have no imagination but was trying to muse on some sort of big Attack power the prince could have, b/c the classic thing to happen in the story (whether mentioned in its text or not) is for mytho to go ham with some such Power Surge [Magic Thing] to drive the raven away after lohengrin gets Got. even after he gets his full prince Abilities back he mostly only seems to Attack with his sword. damn wait a second and when he just like crashes Into the raven the big Swan Made Of Light appears first like hang on like is that Him? was it part of his Transport, can he like, Also turn into a swan of light or is it just how he Appears, was it tutu’s Hope Manifestation again since he’s being That to rue in that moment, oh my god. a lot to consider. anyways, but then the thing is, some sort of like Energy Blast move would go outside the realm of [fighting with the sword alone] and the prince’s Magic mostly seeming to be like, a mobility Boost, and how everything abt the prince is centered around Defense and Protection rather than going on the offensive. but then, who’s to say the Heart Shattering technique couldn’t be used as an Attack but was used by the prince only as a self-sacrificial protective thing, and who’s to say the prince Doesn’t have other powerful Attacks to draw from but refrains from using them if there’s others around to be hurt or whatever. i’m just trying to think of how the prince could just really go tf off and Immediately get the raven to fuck off after lohengrin is ko’d because that’s appropriately Tragically Dramatic & Emotion-Fueled Magic, not to mention the best case scenario vs still having to continue like 23 hours of battle when your boyfriend Just died. i mean like boom Light Blasts type situation i guess. or maybe he could just land a really good sword hit like Right Away. thinking about it. anyways

7) oh wait shit lmfao idk if this was The other thought but it was Another thought. that everyone in The Story (Within Reality) is like, locked in The Town (although they can leave if they’re not a Character / if they entered from outside? presumably) but in episode one this all kicks off b/c mytho was at The Lake which is Outside the town, right? i’m pretty sure. which like, is that something he Can and has been able to Do.....is this a. a liminal space. or did/does drosselmeyer like drop him over there sometimes For Some Reason, like having “stages” available around here, a la the s1 finale.....like, didn’t seem like he Knew if he put mytho in front of waterfowl that one would become devoted to restoring mytho’s heart. probably Does Not Matter, Actually, but it sure happened and much to Think about there. shoutout to mytho dancing en pointe whenever it’s magical and he can do so, e.g. when dancing naked on the surface of a liminal lake, or midair with tutu. iconic

8) the point is i’m sure just Thinking About Him (mytho)