#idk how researching is fun for people 😭

[belltherad]

i want the knowledge but to have the knowledge i need to research

[redbullgirly]

hi hi can i request a max verstappen x footballer smau but she plays for real madrid femenino and we know max is an fcb supporter (also for the sake of the smau, real madrid femenino can be just as good as barcelona femeni) and everyone going crazy when she just takes him to an award ceremony as her plus-one. no soft launch no hard launch and everyone including the grid and christian horner and madristas and everyone is shocked

MADRIDISTAS [MV1/33]

Max Verstappen x footballer!RealMadridFemenino!reader

Masterlist

Summary: Y/N is one of the biggest rising stars in women's football, playing for Real Madrid Femenino. When she's nominated by Women's Football Awards for the Player of the Year, the last thing anybody would expect is her plus one to the ceremony being Formula One driver, Max Verstappen. Not only is he the World Champion himself, but most importantly, Max is a known FC Barcelona fan. Talk about making friends with the enemy...

Warnings: I have very limited knowledge of football, so everything in this story is based on my quick research. If you're a fan, please don't come for me! Though any advice would be much appreciated, because I have more football requests in my inbox XD.

Author's Note: Hi Anon, thanks for the request! I have to say it was quite challenging for me at the start, because I don't know many things about football, but at the end it turned out fun and good. Hope you like what I did with this social media au! :)

yourusername posted on instagram

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tagged: realmadridfem

yourusername And it's a wrap!🥈⚽️ Thank you to the whole team for another amazing year, we fought hard and we will continue to fight for the Champions League title next year as 2023/24 runners-up. Hala Madrid!✨🇪🇸

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user1 Love the way you play!

realmadridfem Hala Madrid!💪🏆

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yourusername 💯

user2 💥💥💥

user3 Vamosssss

user4 GO GIRLLL🤩🤩🤩🤩

user5 you really deserved to win the finale, the referee was totally biased agains you!!!

user6 Yeah, even as a FC Barcelona fan I didn't think it was fair🙈

martagarcialopez19 amazing Y/N! 🫶

yourusername Thank youuu!💖

user7 wait does y/n know some people from motosport???

user8 No I think it's just girls supporting girls in sports dominated by men tbh ☺️

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user7 oh yeah that makes sense

user9 Buen trabajo que equipo tan bueno con todas y en lo personal muy guapa [Good job, what a great team with everyone and personally very pretty.]

marisabel_rguez The dream team 🙌

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yourusername Yessss

user10 HALA MADRID 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

user11 literally the prettiest soccer player I ever saw😻

user12 you mean FOOTBALL?!😂🧐

user11 sry i'm american so i'm used to saying soccer

user12 well that's WRONG girly😂

user13 Princess

messages between Y/N and Max

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yourusername Short stop back home in Monaco before flying to London for Women's Football Awards and my nomination for Player of the Year 🤞🌷

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user1 so pretty

maitetxuu_10 The nails Y/N 🤩

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yourusername Not better than yours though 😚

user2 i don't watch football but maybe i should start bc of you

user3 Wow you're such a cutie 😍❤️

charlottesiine great work out together!

yourusername Agreed! We should definetly hit the gym together more often 😂

user4 omg wait how do they know each other?? didn't expect y/n y/l/n to be friends with ex-wags??

user5 Idk but they both live in Monaco so it's easy to know basically everyone who's your age there xdd

yourusername True user5, they don't tell you how small the country actually is 😭

user6 SHE IS MY ROLE MODEL EVERYBODY

user7 👏👏👏👏🔥🔥

lucybrozne Seems like the Monaco sun suits you 😁☀️

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yourusername Oh thanks Lucy! 🫶

lucybrozne 🫶

user8 i love that despite fcb beating madrid they're still friends outside of the field🥺

user9 WOW you should be a model

user10 So sad your talents aren’t being fully appreciated in Madrid.

user11 oh c'mmon she probably wouldn't play for them if she felt unappreciated 🙄

user12 but tbh I think she should be the captain.... like she's literally the best player of them all BY FAR

user13 Nah I don't like her. Hope she'll never be a captain🤮

user12 then go away? lol

user13 damnn the 3rd picture did some unholy things to me 😩

user14 right?! I don't think I'm straight anymore🫣

user15 I have no idea who she is but let me tell you she's gorgeous

user16 ✨✨✨👑🎀🌹

twitter

messages between Max and Christian Horner & Max and Carlos Sainz

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tagged: maxverstappen1

yourusername Turning him into Madridista duh.

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maxverstappen1 Y/N I love you... but that's never happening ❤️

yourusername Liar! You complained for a week straight about how that referee in the finals wasn't fair and we should have won agains Barcelona! 😘

carlossainz55 hahaaa mate she got you😂

maxverstappen1 😒

user1 OMGGG we converted him on our side!!!

user2 A sad day to be a FC Barcelona supporter and F1 fan😓

user3 A happy day for Madridistas!😍

user4 damn I may have to start watching football

martagarcialopez19 you're glowing! also thanks god now I don't have to keep the secret anymore xd

yourusername Love ya! 🫶

user5 The IT WAG

user6 can we take a moment to appreciate how cute maxie looks here?🥹

realmadridfem You go girl! Convert new fans!🤩💪

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user7 I'm still shocked by this whole thing 😹

user8 you're not the only one lol

user9 the second picture????

user10 Max is so lucky man🥵

marisabel_rquez ¡La pareja poderosa!😍 [The power couple!😍]

liked by the author

user11 this post murdered me and dragged me all over slaycity with how much it served 🤭

user12 exactly! her and max are so hot and pretty

user13 🤍😍💯🥳 Hala Madrid!!!

maxverstappen1 posted on instagram

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tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1 My girl ❤️⚽️

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THE END

Author's Note: Thank you for reading the whole thing! I'll appreciate likes, reblogs, follows and comments, or any other way of support. Let me know what you think about this pairing and please tell me if there are any football errors, because I have another request about footballer!reader waiting for me. Have a great day! :)

[walkingzombiegirl]

how about some sexually frustrated banter with hange, the only other titan scientist behind the walls who you're always competing with when it comes to your research?

or flirty ellie who always gets on your nerves but in reality she's just a big loser and a science geek and that actually makes her kinda hot...

oorrrr knight abby who is devoted to your protection and the kingdom's so that is why she has put up with that bratty attitude until one day she finally snaps and calls you a brat and suddenly you're all flustered and that was almost all it took to have you spread out beneath her with her head lost between your legs. she could stay there for hours and be satisfied with just that .

anyway i have a huge thing for enemies to lovers and banter idk what's wrong with me 😭😭

━ 𝙂𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙧 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 - ellie williams x fem!reader

𝘀𝘆𝗻𝗼𝗽𝘀𝗶𝘀 - Ellie and you are opposites, causing a bit of bickering that never seems to end. But when she has to go to her room before Dina gets back to find her wallet, she drags you along. However, it takes a more fun turn that you would've ever thought possible. Especially since you fucking hate her.

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 - cursing, bitchy!reader, flirting, slight alludes to previous sexual encounter between them, alludes to having sex at the end, scandalous figurine

𝗲𝘅𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘀 - sorry i disappeared if you couldn't tell by how badly this was written i haven't been feeling the best and been stressed about college! Also I am planning on writing the other two... slow roll.

"Did you buy all of these?" You asked glancing around her decked out room, in awe at how many figurines she had around the place. Practically stacked full, wall to wall was gaming posters, ones of various rock bands, some shows and cartoons you didn't recognize. Between those was shelves of comic books, and an overly messy deck scattered with work and drawings she quickly covered up.

"Yeah, that's how shopping works."

You glared at her, looking around at the room some more before spotting another shelf that had more little people. You smiled, picking up a lady that was wearing a rather scandalous outfit.

You nearly let a laugh escape, twirling her around in your fingers, her dress the same color as your nails. At that, it was promptly snatched from your fingers. A scoff falling from your lips.

"What? I was just looking." But when your eyes met her freckled face you noticed a light coat of pink dusted her cheeks. Her eyes rocketing around the room like she'd been told there was someone ready to kill her inside. "Don't touch anything." "Alright, alright." You huffed, putting your hands up in faux submission.

"Can I at least sit somewhere while I wait for you to do whatever the fuck you dragged me in here to do?" You asked, Ellie immediatley giving a glare and then pointing at the mattress with a tight face. The little hot lady still in her hand.

You couldn't help yourself, you peered at her, squinting to see past her fingers. Once she realized, however, the little lady hurriedly went flying over her shoulder and knocked against the desk.

"Hey!" You plopped down on the bed, the springs squeaking under your weight. "I just wanted to see her." "It's none of your business just wait a minute for me."

You didn't respond, instead watching her ruffle around in the top drawer of her dresser. But you couldn't help yourself, you turned around to look at the photo board you seen when you walked in, all of Dina, Jesse, and others like Abby and Nora.

Boring... until, wait?

"Is that me?" You then broke the silence, scooting up the bed to see a photo of you and Dina on the beach from last summer. You were both grinning at the camera and holding up beers. "That's from the night we-" "Yes."

You peered back to her, green irises staring into your soul as you met her eyes.

"You're a freak." "You look hot in that picture." By the look on her face you were probably number three in the amount of total girls she'd said that to. To their faces anyway. "You are such a nerd." You whispered, staring at her with an almost freakishly large grin on your face.

"You are a bitch." She then replied, her expression mirroring your own. "Says the perv with a picture of me on your wall in a bikini. Creep." "Says little miss 'let me see your doll's tits, Ellie'." She spoke, but didn't seem annoyed, instead, almost intrigued as you responded, "You own the doll!"

"Not for those reasons!" She spat, laughing halfway through the sentence. "Are you sure you don't fuck the doll, Ellie?" "You wish I did, it'd be the closest you've gotten to me in months." You sneered at that, biting your lip.

"You're so full of yourself." Ellie rolled her eyes. "Whatever." "Whatever? God you irritate the fuck out of me." You exclaimed, running your hands down your face with a groan. "You're in my room." "You told me to just to go with you."

There was a pregnant pause before,

"Please tell me you jack to the photo." "No!" She stared at you, making a face. "No." "You do!" "So what you're not horrible to look at." You smirked up at her, shaking your head. "Perv." You hummed, her face inching closer to yours, eyes flickering from your eyes to your lips before back up again.

"Whatever."

"Nuh uh, you don't get to do that." You said and reached forward grabbing her buckle, pulling her in. "You fucking freak." She just rolled her eyes, looking back at her bedroom door.

There was a silence that felt thick compared to the conversation just had, her head rolling back to face you.

"How long until Dina gets back?" She asked, eyes practically gouging into yours. Her stare had you squirming already.

"Long enough."

She nodded, looking again before at the alarm clock beside her bed.

"Do you-"

"Yes Ellie. Yes."

"Okay."

awkward ellie is more canon then sex god ellie and i stand by that

[k0droid]

would they say the n-word / are they racist: twisted wonderland edition

Inspired by twstowo's taxes headcanon post.

I meant to post this during february but i just didnt.

REMEMBER THAT IS ALL FOR SHITS N GIGGLES. IF YOU THINK YOUR POOKIE IS/IS NOT A RACIST, REBLOG OR LEAVE A COMMENT

4/2 edit: JESUS CHRIST DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY 😭😭 THESE AREN'T REAL HCS, JUST SOMETHING STUPID FOR BLACK TWST FANS TO ENJOY

GRIM: Yess that's my baby boy my son my son yes I give him the pass

RIDDLE: Couldn't waterboard the n-word outta him. Uses 'Off With Your Head' to punish anyone who uses slurs

TREY: Wouldn't. Not a racist and has no interest in saying the word.

CATER: Researches what's offensive to certain groups so he can stay respectful, no n-word from him

ACE: ace is literally that one white friend who thinks his n-word 'jokes' are funny (they're not) and he walks around with Riddle's collar because of that. He def went to a middle school named after a Confederate, but he's not racist for the most part "I play basketball so-" or "I'm gonna say the n-word: ninja!!" - 🥸

DEUCE: No. He's a good guy. He would never and if he said something remotely offensive, he'd apologize with tears

LEONA: YESS BLACK KING 🗣🔥🔥‼‼‼‼

JACK: Could and he does, but only occasionally. Punches the shit outta Ace's shoulder if he says something distasteful

RUGGIE: YES he just light-skinnted 😕 Ace would make fun of him for eating all the stereotypical foods

AZUL: Slightly racist. Just slightly. Seems like the type to get a lil tense when a tanned, well-built dude walks into the Monstro Lounge. starts clutching his pearls n shit

JADE: No, I don't really see him being racist or saying the n-word

FLOYD: Probably the least likely to say the n-word and would get offended that you even assumed. Like his entire mood would change if you mention it "Ehh Shrimpy? You tryna get squeezed? What made you think I would say that??" *fucking kills you*

KALIM: No, no n-word from Al-Asim. I could see him as a racist though. i think of kalim as purposely ignorant so in my mind, he's INTENTIONAL with his microaggressions but no one really calls him out on it.

JAMIL: Yes but only cuz I give him the pass.

VIL: Doesn't say the n-word (he knows better) but probably screams it in his thoughts. idk guys vil just seems a bit racist.

ROOK: Who's in Paris. LOL but I don't think he'd say the n-word. Also probably one of the least racist here. But he'd bring up eugenics in a convo and ruin the mood completely.

EPEL: I genuinely don't know if he would or not. Like because he from some rural area (to my knowledge, i js started book 5), i feel like he wouldn't because he'd know better. but i also heard that epel is misogynistic and hating black people & hating women go hand in hand (misogynoir)

IDIA: No but it wouldn't be surprising. i can already imagine him in that cod lobby. probably gets his slurs from cater

ORTHO: No my sweet child would not say the n-word. would blast idia out of this world with a charged beam if he said anything offensive

MALLEUS: No.

LILIA: Probably has said it before and is the most educated when it comes to black culture in the diasomnia group other than sebek (my 4c king)

SEBEK: No, in fact i might give him the pass (#mixedking😍❤️)

SILVER: No but probably a little colorist. yk how some black men love to scream from the mountain tops that they love white women? well silver is that white woman. js saying

this was fun to make. pls remember that its just a silly post, dont get mad because only hit dogs will holler.

"what abt the staff/yuus/extras-" send an ask :3

4/2 edit: its crazy cuz the only mad people are white🧍🏾‍♀️

[luffyvace]

Her brook Idk if your req are closed so read this at your convenience 🙏

I wanted to ask for a male harpy reader strawhat hc or if not just hc with luffy, more specifically based off a bird with heavy feathers like a snowy owl cause I’d love to imagine that he complains about the heat a lot and wonders why he’s sweating more then usual but it’s just luffy hugging his legs cus he’s so soft

Love your work brook 🙏☺️

nope! Still open lovely anon<3

when I tell you I did NOT know what a harpy was 🤦‍♀️ I had to do research for accuracy 😅😋

but don’t worry it’s all good I’ll be more than happy to do your request!

I’m telling you right here right now luffy would most definitely be interested in a reader like this!! You know how many unique animals and such he tried to recruit into the crew that weren’t even human?? 😂💗

and thank you!! I’m so happy you enjoy my headcanons :) that makes me very happy!

Okay I’m just saying…….like chopper…if you look more animal than human….his first thought is to eat you

”you think he tastes good?” 😋

😭😭

IT JUST IS !!

moving on…♡

He thinks your wings are really cool

I mean a 6.5 ft wing span…….I do too!!

definitely wanted to measure them to check after he learned that

to which he got himself wrapped up in the measuring tape

Both you and luffy eat “strange” animals

such as sloths, monkeys, porcupines, squirrels, opossums, armadillo’s, anteaters and sometimes parrots…..other birds too 😋🍴

No animal is safe 😭

every island you go to the two of you immediately start scouting for whatever variety of yummy foods you could find

”I’ve got news for you two—normal people don’t eat those animals”

- Nami ♡

it taste absolutely delicious to you!!

honestly you probably got Luffy into eating them

which so funny because he already loves eating all types of weird things

which is probably why he was so easy to convince him to eat it too

like he would normally see a monkey and go oh cool a monkey!

but now….😈😈

not all the time tho

mostly when he’s hungry

……….so I guess I lied, yes all the time 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

he saw you eating a armadillo with some sloth on the side and was like

oooo I gotta try that 🤪🤪

you might dislike for cats seeing as though a harpy’s predator is a jaguar

Least baby harpy’s anyway…

still! 😠

it’s good for you that the sunny is big once y’all upgrade from merry

it has plenty of rooms with shade for you, since a harpy’s natural habitat is rainforests

and they mainly stay in the shade anyway :)

franky probably had a room built that simulates a rainforest for your comfort 💕

like how he simulated the grass

once Luffy found out harpy’s are rare to find and you found the tori tori no mi - model: harpy- it was pretty much settled for you to join the crew :)

like he loves rare stuff!

it’s like treasure!

and you know darn well a pirate will fight for his treasure! 😼

you use your high pitch bird call to reunite the strawhats whenever you guys get separated (which is like- every time you go on an adventure 😀 besides the point-)

it’s loud enough and ranges far enough to the point where it’s more efficient than yelling

very much so comes in handy when your in danger too

also not to mention luffy is 100% gonna wanna fly on your back since you have wings

he probably won’t even ask

he’ll just rocket onto your back while your flying one day and refuse to get off cuz it’s fun

it likely ends with him spotting something cool, telling you to go over to it and getting you two into trouble

just be ready for the

😬😁 ✊😠 💥💥 😖😓

sequence again

flying also comes in handy when saving the strawhat’s BUTT!

You and Robin like 🦅🦅

LOLLL

but no fr you literally just swoop in and save the day 🦸

SUPERRRRRRR M/N!! *super man pose* better yet *franky pose*

Zoro will also appreciate it if you catch him while falling because I swear that man is always getting smacked around-

same with Nami 🧡

another time

Robin was stating facts about harpy’s when the strawhats first met you, and you were confirming

she mentioned that they typically lived 35-45 years (but she was talking about the ANIMAL.)

Luffy—of course—mistook this

“WHAAAT?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME OUR NEW NAKAMA’S GONNA DIE SOON?!”

*Nami steps in*

”CALM DOWN IDIOT THATS NOT WHAT SHE SAID!!” 💥💥

“……..and besides..! M/n’s not an animal! He’s still a person you know?! Sheesh…..of course he’s gonna live the lifespan of a human”

Sanji will of course cook any animal of your request into your meal

if it’s more nutritious for you—then certainly he’ll do so!

he always prioritizes nutritional value in his meals, and thats different for everybody!

Luffy however….he will get annoyed with 😂

”GO AWAY STUPID *kicks across room* YOU DONT NEED THIS TO SURVIVE! THIS IS FOR M/N!”

your like one of the few men in his life Sanji doesn’t hate

okay I know that was more harpy facts related so now I’ll get into the scenario you mentioned 😅💗

Luffy uses you for warmth in the winter (all the strawhats do)

like chopper ;P

especially with your large and soft wings

”M/n…spread your wings out..we need your warmth..”

-Zoro

you’ve been complaining about the heat all day

You felt like you were ON FIRE.

like seriously?! What was gon on today?!

it’s not like birds need to shed……so why are you burning up!??

”mmmm…your so warm M/n!”

”LUFFY?!”

”shishishishishi!”

”no wonder I felt heavier than usual!! Get off me Luffy!”

”awwhhhh WHYYYYYY?”

”what?! Why?! Because I’m burning up! I already have all these feathers! You’ve got to get off of me Luffy!”

*whines* “but mmmmm/nnnnnn! Your so waaaarrrrm!”

*sighs and face palms* *attempts to pry him off*

“noooooo m/nnnnnn! I don’t waaaaanna get ooofff!!”

Luffy practically had you in a literal choke hold

he was not about to let you go.

and you know he’s got himself wrapped alllllll the way around 😂😂

once again thank you for the compliment my dear!!

Hopefully I did your hcs justice and that you enjoyed them! <3

[fuumiku]

Selkie AU

Ok so on discord we went off. A lot of this is just paraphrasing or copy pasted from buddies hii guys. It’s honestly a fun concept to play with no matter how you turn it around~ I’ll start off with the version I drew these doodles for but it’s all under the cut because it got so long... There’s also always place for different flavors like if they realize the other’s a selkie immediately or over time, etc etc so this is all just food for thought. Marcille is always the instigator though lol, obsessed with him no matter the universe. As a selkie wants to learn more about this human and as a researcher is chasing after this secretive mysterious sea-guy while he very much tries to escape everyone’s attention.

Fisherman Chil & selkie Marcille

Old sad fisherman Chilchuck… He drinks out at sea even. Divorcee dad who’s got nothing waiting for him on land anymore. He’s on the sea every day to get fish to sell at the wet market or to the butcher, the sky and sea’s grey and everything’s dull and tedious. Seals are nothing special either. The only stuff he knows about selkies really could have some selkie storybooks he reads to his daughters. Meanwhile selkie Marcille… You could go a lot of different routes I feel. You know I feel like being a selkie fits with Marcille and her mom, with that interaction of "you’ll have to let others go and deal with that", like in this AU she’ll always be different and will have to leave people behind for the sea eventually here and there and whatnot…

Chilchuck and worksongs... Fisherman Chilchuck singing sea shanties while selkie Marcille sings her songs of the sea and then she hears him and gets curious and follows him back on land or something…… Tries to blend in with humans just so she’s like. What’s his deal. But them only meeting out at sea is very cute as well. Eventually she gets on his boat and they hang out. Melancholic psychological horror sea tragedy-romance would be fun idk. Maybe he starts hearing a woman sing out at sea randomly and thinks it’s the alcohol. But he’d be a goner already lmao. Like don’t get me wrong it’d take a while of actual interactions for him to actually fall in love, but also ~~he’s lonely~~ pretty blonde woman waaaa. Siren imagery hehe. "Hmmm I didn't know selkies had hypnotic voices as well" (they don't. he's down outrageous and he knows it.) Mr "in denial so bad maybe magic is the answer yep for sure". I want her to hear him singing something he used to for his daughters/wife etc and shes like 👁️👁️ who hurt this man........... (Could also work for selkie Chil) What’s his tragic backstory…..

I think marcille also deserves to go silly and catch a carp between her teeth, giving it to chilchuck batting her eyelashes like teehee... I'm such a good assistant right... He needs them undamaged if he wants to sell them but he still makes use of her gift anyway... Puts it in a stew and shares it with her... Something we made together..… Marcille being able to taste human food with actual spices and actual heat and actual cooked meat... His home is the warmest place on the surface. His hugs are more comforting than even the water’s. AGH and how long hasn’t he eaten a real homecooked meal you’d bet 😭 Marcille notices he’s underweight and is like "he’s always fishing though??? Does he just need like, a lot??" and takes it upon herself to bring him more fish to feed him. "He NEEDS to blubber up. I know it." Do you think when his wife was still there he'd come home to the smell of cooking.... but now there's nothing......... He’s on his own, he sleeps in the boat… It just smell like fish all day. The stench gets to him and even the burn of alcohol in his nostrils is a kinder hell. NOW he comes back to the stench of roting flesh and he's like :))) ahh.... my gi rl firned 💖 /j

Selkie Marcille getting onto his boat out of nowhere and slapping the beer bottle out of his hand. It’d go hard if he’s so drunk once that he’s leaning over the railing with his bottle hanging down from his grip and the beer goes into the sea and she tastes it and is like. Now what the fuck is this. Ew. He doesn’t look so good maybe I should splash him with water. She could save him from drowning... Girl who puts him on a rock somewhere until he wakes up and hides in the water as soon as he comes to… Peekinh at him from the surface of the water because, oh dear we're shy now because it's face to face… Drawing parallels between swaying (drunk) and swaying (motion of boat on the sea). She sways his world…… Makes him feel dizzy in a nice, light airy way…… He crashes into his bed in his home and still feels the rocking of the waves under him, and he falls asleep thinking of her…

Go out to the sea in a storm because you can’t stand feeling useless. The sea is your livelihood, it's where you're good and useful. On land you never know what to do with your hands. Maybe he should just let the sea pull him under. let it sweep him away.  Marcille does exactly that, but it's not something that erases him. It's not something that swallows him whole. It's something that shows him a whole other world- The coral reefs, the schools of fish that exist below, the lush seaweed forests that Marcille treasures so much. It's all been there for him to see, theres so much beneath his feet. And all he had to do was let her take his hand. This world full of fish and creatures he's caught and gutted... that he gets to see in a different light…… The idea of him trusting her enough to let her lead him underwater... I think the time that Marcille leads him into the water should be on one beautiful evening, with the water shimmering, and the sun casting rays onto the waters surface- enough that it's still scary at first, enough that Chilchuck still struggles against the salty grasp of the waves, but when marcille takes him under he can see just how the light of the sun casts its spotlight on the seafloor- and how even in the shallows therein lies a thousand wonders, ones he's stepped right over before. I'm just obsessed with chilchuck experiencing a whole nother world in there. Give me childlike wonder. Give me a Marcille who wants to show her grump fucking fisherman boyfriend the cute fishies and the minnows, the pretty hermit crabs. Something about the sea looking different from beneath the waves... The parallels of him on the beach stepping over shells and urchins in the shallows with his boots and just crush them right over, not even noticing he did from force of habit and routine having dulled everything… Him working on the sea all the time but never really seeing it because he’s so absorbed in his own shit and he always just uses the harbor so there’s never real contact with it anyways. When the sea water laps at his forearms when he reels the net in but they feel like lashes of frost against his skin. She'd look really pretty with her hair flowy in the waves............ Marcille’s hair should get used for creepy compositions more… In the water she takes him under and her hair tangles and latch onto him against his skin. Her hair is long, underwater it could engulf him probably, he likes blonde hair he'd be happy with that… Not the lowkey suicidal ideation of letting the sea take him and how he’d be happy suffocating in her hair when doing a dive wow ok

I keep thinking about the Dredge AU… The video game yes yes. It’d be a mess but ohhh ohh the sea and its wonderful world but also its dark secrets, Marcille researching the depths and finding dark powers and idk the tragedy of a man at sea who can’t forget what he’s lost and the mythical gf he made that was never meant to be and it’ll destroy them both idk idk. Bc of Marcille helping him fish from below as a selkie, Senshi like YOU ARE OVERFISHING YOU ARE DESTROYING THE ECOSYSTEMMM @ them lmao You are feeding the whole town and making big bucks but you’re fishing so much that some fish are starting to get stale without being bought, the sea is bleeding and the leviathan is hungry

Maybe one time, one of them gets upset at the other and holds the seal fur hostage, its sooo mean but it also feels very them. When I think selkie I think of the movie Song of the Sea and in that movie the father of the protags loved a selkie, the mother, but she had to leave at one point for the sea because that’s her nature etc etc, but he didn’t want her to leave so he hid her skin which like. Ruined everything and hurt her. And ohhh the parallels… Leaving him… Just food for thought.

Selkie Chil & marine researcher Marcille

The reverse of that where Chil’s the selkie, Marcille’s fascination for him has the reverse angle, almost like admiration too. Crying she’d be like "who’s this mysterious guy, why’s he look kinda ethereal(selkie fairy blablabla)?" and investigates meanwhile he doesn’t want anyone to see him transforming and such so he’s like "leave me aloneeeeeee!!" Selkie chil? secretive man who just wants to chill gets grabbed by the most enthusiastic fairytale-obsessed girl out there. She WILL almost drown trying to say hi. C’mon mister mythical let’s have a storybook romance <3 Jumping in da water and he has to rescue her and immediately gains 100 grey hairs. She gets her storybook ‘saved by the merman’ moment but at what cost. "WHAT ARE YOU DOINGGG" screaming, she gets scolded very much but it all goes in one ear out the other tbh. Selkie Chilchuck is even better with his secretiveness... How do you get around the fact you’re a seal? Iunno I’ve never been a seal Obsessed with the implications of his family in this. Except if his wife and daughters were humans and so his work travels are instead selkie shenanigans going out at sea for months on ends, I imagine they’d be selkies too… Did they get separated? Die? Is Chilchuck’s cowl in this one Flertom’s fur? :(   Once more mentioning sea shanties Chilchuck btw, Roll the Old Chariot comes to mind… Ooough Song of the Sea from the movie that he sung to his daughters <33 I’m fine

With the researcher angle actually being pushed there are interesting plots and scenes you could think of obvi, but uh we kind of went off on the fisherman Chil Marcille selkie AU instead haha. It’d be cute if she ends up teaching him how to live on land in the end. Dresses him up like a funky lil guy. I went with tallman Chil when drawing it and selkie Marcille’s more elf-like, and for selkie Chil I’d imagine it’s the reverse where she’s tallman-like and he still looks like a halfling… Sea-related AUs are my weak spot <33

No matter how you turn it, Marcille is the instigator lol. Selkie Marcille: this little man… I want to know more about this human! Selkie Chilchuck = tries to avoid everything but this Marcille keeps chasing him! It’s her job to, Chilchuck minds his business!! He sees a sliver of something weird out at night? Not his job nope keep your nose out of that it’ll only bring you trouble. It’d have to really itch him at him for him to crack I think… Honestly he’d make a great lovecraftian horror protagonist lol. We love a girl with no chill and her nose in everyone’s business

Shout to to @dayundying, @cabinette, @soappox and @lucky-fydraws!! These people were there for the brainstorming and the writing of the scripture…

[dearsaintavangeline]

SOME DC RARESHIPS AND MY OPINIONS ON THEM(because this is supposed to be a yapping account but i wont be going on an analysis)

1)harpercass: my best friend got me into this ship and honestly they are very very cute. if it wasnt for stephcass they would be probably my favourite ship for cass for sure

2)timives: again, the same best friend got me into this ship but i have to thank them because this ship is a great ship

3)damimaps/mapsbird: i didnt look at them as a ship material but now that i do its a great ship made out of a great dynamic. i love my little detective duo <33

4)stephrose: SORORITY GIRLS RISE!! jokes aside i think they would have been a very fun duo to read about in a platonic or romantic relationship

5)colindami: friends to lovers my beloved <33 they were very very entertaining to read and their bond was something i would like to see agian i wish dc would just bring back colin tbh but thats not gonna happen sadly :((

6)harlcativy: god gave us two(2) hands for a reason😈😈 also idk if this is a rareship but i didnt see anything about it so im assuming it is

7)darlasteph(idk their ship name): i smell lesbanism on them but darla being the reason steph became robin and darla dying because of stephs actions after she got fired is :(( it makes me cry ngl

8) taidami/greenbird: i honestly did not know this ship existed until a week ago and from my researches they are the same age(correct me if im wrong) if im right then artist lovers here i come!! i actually want them to be friends badly but i would also love an academic rivals to lovers arc with them(them being friends in their vigilante self but fighting in civvies lol) academic rivals to lovers because damian would love that trope imo(kinda canon with their manga)

9)tamsteph: i saw fanart of them today now i cannot get them out of my mind i think they would get along pretty well

10)babskori/starwatch: im a sucker for women leaving their ex and dating eachother instead they would have been a very nice relationship maybe it wouldnt work out tho?? who knows

11)jaderoy: idk how they are a rareship while being canon but i cannot find anything about them😭😭 doomed tragic yuri noo..😣

12)ghostcat: honestly this came out as a joke😭😭 i was thinking about ghostdemonbatcat(amazing ship ik😼) and i thought "this implies khoa and selina is also dating hmmm" and just went from there tbh

13) mara/maya(either m&m or r&y): no comment on this one because i dont know if their ages match the only reason i wrote it is because i wanted to tell people the ship name i came up for them😈😈

14)demoncat: they arent that rare but cat wives is all i wanna say

15)timtam: same with jaderoy, i cannot find content of them. they were very sweet imo

honorary mention to the ships i dont know well but my best friend does and she knows the best

*cissie/cassie

*cassie/steph

*greta/cassie

[wintersera]

business issues || ceo!kimlip x ceo!reader

notes: i had sm fun writing this i cant lie. BUT anyways if you study business or whatever and i get the terms and shit wrong… no i didn’t pls ignore it </3 ALSO researching high end rich people stuff was a pain in the ass bc it reminds me that i dont have disposable money- also reader is a ‘tsundere’ yk the trope,, and is also like 5’11 just because 😭

cw: degredation, dom reader, sub idol, theyre just very mean to eachother. use of the word ‘brat’ but idk if i characterised kimlip enough to be a brat 😭😭

wc: 3.2k

shit… why is she here?

there was this uncomfortable pressure inside of the meeting room and everyone around felt it, but they couldn’t understand why. a couple guys crossing their arms looking elsewhere in the room, a close ceo friend of yours awkwardly shifting around in their seat and the deafening sound of silence was just… overbearing. you could hear the sounds of a few people tapping their pens, shuffling their shoes, rustling their jackets and good lord it was awkward as hell.

your completely obvious scowl was directed to one person in the room and it was none other than your life long rival, miss kim jungeun.

well let me give you a rundown. you came from a background of extremely successful business men and women. growing up spoilt by your parents, you always looked down at people who were well… less fortunate than you. growing up with a family who were heavily involved with stocks and marketing, you of course, had to honour the family and take up the same jobs as they had. it’s not like you hated it either, in fact, you absolutely enjoyed it. everything was just money, money and more money for you and you were nothing more than happy. your personality wasn’t any better than your average millionaire. picture your stereotypical wealthy individual- that was you, but obviously way worse.

boastful, one of the many words that describe you. you lived for the thrill of business, making risqué deals and then bragging to your peers about how it worked well for you (as if you didn’t threaten them with the risk of losing money… you have your ways) always having recent designer brands on display and whatnot. showing them off to, once again, your peers. and by god you were so cocky about it every single damn time “have you bought louis vuitton's newest arrivals? well i doubt you did, i know a shit ton of your graphs are decreasing. let’s talk about that”

your lifelong rival, kim jungeun, also came from a similar background. another spoiled kid raised by rich and successful parents. like you, she also grew up learning about the marketing business and how to make money easily. another successful business woman in her family, money was a need, a want, a lifetime goal to earn more. she HAD to be rich. it’s just a rich kid thing you know… god, not to mention how painfully bratty she is. throwback to when she’d pester the hell out of her parents to buy her 2 different coloured porsche cars. one black and one red, the same model but different colours… oh, and the time where she started arguing with you about how she wanted the same exact bag as you and begged for you to give it to her? sure, she looked cute be- i mean she looked desperate begging for it. anyways…

now, the two of you sort of grew up with each other, attending the same private school. on the outside people would’ve believed you were friends, really really good friends. but in all seriousness you hated each other's guts. was there a reason? no, not really. rich kid hate was very common actually. petty things like either one of you had a branded item and the other would go mad because they didn’t have it, screaming at each other because you HAD to prove that you were richer than the other, fights over who would ride this specific horse for horse riding practice? the list can go on and on and on.. like said, rich kid problems. what made it worse was that both your parents were best friends, meaning you’d often see each other during your parents’ meetings or somewhere like the golf club. unfortunate right?

anyways, you had started a business at the exact same time as jungeun had. which is also funny because you had started the business in the same area- whats even more funny is that your company specialised in almost the same thing as hers. same starting time, same business, same location, same everything… it’s like you were soulmates or whatever. the thought of that sent shivers down your spine, almost causing you to gag out loud

“my apologies, i feel ill”

you’re sat in the meeting room with numerous other ceos, one notably being your acquaintance miyawaki sakura from hybe cooperation “what’s got you all queasy? nervous for the presentation?” eyes locking into yours, whispering loud enough for only you and her to hear.

“there’s a certain bitch in front of me and the thought of her is making me sick” covering your side profile, whispering back to sakura.

“you have to be joking? miss kim? she’s one, if not, the best strategists out there for marketing. how exactly is she a bitch?”

“uh, hello? i’m clearly the best. also she’s a complete and utter bra-“

cutting you off with a loud cough, the host of the meeting begins his introduction “as you all know, we’ve noticed a couple trends in a lot of your companies graphs. i’ve gathered a few of the best ceos to at least provide some help, because of well… we’re sort of losing audiences right now so-” another throaty cough escapes the mans mouth “-miss kim, if you would like to present first”

rolling your eyes and scoffing i hope you trip over and bruise your ass… her blazer looks very nice today, i wonder who tailored it. whoever did the colouring must use high quality- what the fuck am i thinking about?

not even 5 minutes in and you’re already ticked off. over what? just her, her presence alone pisses you off and it can be seen through the way you’re leaning back on the chair “as seen by this information here i believe that it would most likely attract more audiences. also looking at this chart it sho-“

“clearly you know nothing about the audience, miss kim. you know nothing about this department” a pen twirling around in your fingers.

“excuse me what? i know nothing about the department you say” tilting her head ever so slightly up, intimidating as she may seem, you only scoff at her attempt to drive fear into your heart “i’ll let you know i’m much more qualified in comparison to you”

“HA- as if. i just wanted to mention that your tailoring is humiliating to look at. whoever designed your clothing should be shamed” she looks at you in disbelief, bringing up your petty arguments into the meeting. what are you five?

“miss l/n… you’re stooping way too low” sakura says as she’s holding your arm to calm down.

jungeun ignores sakura, her attention completely diverted onto you and winning the argument “right, as if your tailoring isn’t any better. your cufflinks look like they were made out of nickel silver. how poor do you have to be to buy- i mean borrow cufflinks”

“fuck off. it seems like your eyesight is getting worse, not being able to tell the difference between nickel silver and pure platinum. ha, maybe the fake chopard glasses are fucking with your eyesight”

“you wanna fight?” loosening her sleek black tie, her hands already balled into a fist. seeing her angry made your day, bringing her bratty personality out is what you lived for.

“and break your smug face? with my pleasure” leaping from your chair, you fists ready to land themselves onto her face. yet you feel a couple of people holding you back, one of them being sakura “sakura, you’re a great person, but for the love of god let me go”

“security come quick, a fights broken out” a guy calling for them desperately.

the same goes for jungeun, wanting to smash your face into the table, a few people held her arms. “get off me you lowlifes, you’re ruining my shirt you fucks” flailing around as she’s swatting hands away from her “hands off my blazer, that shit costs more than your monthly salary”

eventually you were escorted out of the building and into your respective cars. what an immature fight you thought to yourself. there was some self reflection going on as your chauffeur drove you back to your house. why exactly did you start pestering jungeun and why did you enjoy it so much? how has she stayed in your mind for so long and why did you keep your rivalry even though you could completely put her out of business (your hubris speaking)

—

you sit at your table, a cup of coffee in your hands as you scan the documents given to you this evening. it was a cold night, the clouds outside your window were dark grey and unwelcoming, much like the knocks at your door “give me a few minutes i’m busy”

you’re currently wearing a white button up, your top button being undone while your tie was hanging around your neck loosely. the rest of your attire was made up of some formal black pants, obviously high end. you looked scruffy today, but it didn’t matter to you since you planned on staying inside your office for the rest of the night.

fuck, your head was throbbing from all the thinking you did yesterday.

another knock on the door and your assistant walks in without any care then leaves? what the fuck “i told you to give me a few minutes, do i need to fire you” shouting at her from across the room. you could care less about your appearance, that was until you saw.. jesus fucking christ… kim jungeun again “why are you here?”

“to apologise for being such a bitch at the meeting” although it sounded genuine, you couldn’t believe someone so haughty could be apologising, it was like you were in a daze how could she be apologising to you while being sober? it’s almost comedic. but you couldn’t just accept it like that, where’s the fun in being nice.

“go on then, bow down and get on your knees or something”

“fuck you mean by that? i change my mind. i’m not apologising to your annoying ass” she spat at the ground “how about you apologise for embarrassing me in front of the other ceos” turning the tables back at you.

as much as she did piss you off you had always looked at her with some sort of interest- yes you fought too much but that’s what made your relationship interesting, to be honest you felt a little sad when she never paid much attention to you. maybe just a little jealous when she would argue with her employees and not you.

“you’re so bratty you know” you scoff, feeling heat rise to your head. standing up from your desk you tread carefully towards her, eyes narrowing as you rip off your tie from your collar, a fiery gaze piercing through her like daggers “there’s no way in hell i will ever apologise to you, brat” you would be lying if you weren’t turned on right now, seeing her once stoic face turn into a cowardly frown made you feel sort of… aroused. “oho, not speaking back for once, cat got your tongue?” your body towering over her with ease, thank the lord for your amazing genetics because now you’re trapping a 5’4 girl between the wall and yourself.

“you’re so pretty when you don’t furrow your brows at me, fuck, you look even better when you have that dumb look on your face” you’ve only been alone with her for a couple of minutes and your knee is placed in between her thighs, she lets out a small whimper, much to your surprise. she could’ve fought you right here right now yet she didn’t, instead she lets you do as you please.

looking at her you coo, “letting me humiliate you like this? i thought you had decorum jungeun,” that may have been her breaking point, you never EVER called her by her first name and with that simplistic action of calling her ‘jungeun’ you had her in the palm of your hands.

jungeun chuckled “you’re saying i’m the one without decorum, yet you’re here pinning me against the wall in your office” her hands sliding down your chest, resting itself on your abdomen. her actions spoke words, she’s as riled up as you were and you knew it.

biting your lip, you try not to make a sound, tracing her fingers around your waist. “you want me don’t you y/n. give in and just fuck me”

the last few words ringing in your ears. forcefully grabbing her arms and bending her over your desk like a slut, her pencil skirt showing the curves of her ass very well “you don’t need prepping, your wetness is already soaking through the fabric… are you a slut or something jungeun?” smirking. without hesitation you drop to your knees, peeling off her tights, exposing her ass to the air “keep your mouth shut for me” you say as you pull her panties aside, her glistening cunt waiting for it to be fucked by you- and you only.

it was a sight to see, and fortunately it was only for you. pausing in your tracks you lean back to observe the scene “you look amazing, however you’d look even better without this cheap skirt” ripping it off of her waist.

“you’re so pretentious that it’s almost disgusting”

“i didn’t say that it looked horrible on you this time though'' truth be told, you were actually internally salivating at the way the skirt enhanced her body lines, but it’s whatever. you could buy another one for her.

parting her folds apart you suck gently on her clit, eliciting a few muffled moans. grabbing her thighs just to pull them apart to make it easier for you. she rolled her eyes back, feeling vibrations from your “mhm’s” and “so good” and other comments on how good she tastes.

the friction of your tongue circling around her clit made her scream out loud “the whole building is gonna hear you if you don’t shut your mouth” yet you secretly didn’t mind that. sure you had a reputation and so did she, but in this moment you couldn’t care less. seeing how responsive she was only made you greedier, she was like money to you; you wanted more. you felt hot, something you couldn’t explain took over your mind and made you work hard. lapping up her cunt, practically making out with her pussy now, you take your hand that was resting on her leg and slide two digits inside of her gently.

“s-shit.. ah-“ clutching onto your desk with her hand while the other one tries to reach for your wrist. moving so painfully slow, you watch her hole swallow and clench around you fingers. entranced by the way it looks and by the way her walls feel wrapped around you, it was like a perfect fit “go, fuck- faster, d-don’t be like this…” the way her voice trembled sent shivers down your body, sounding so desperate and needy that it was overwhelming. never in your entire life had you seen her this desperate and it made you feral.

slowly, ever so slowly, you thrust your fingers in and out. your tongue still working circles around her clit. although it wasn’t like you being sweet and caring, you made sure to start slow. really, fucking, slow. moving her hips in tune to your movements, because you’re that much of an asshole that you had to be painfully slow.

but that’s the fun of it, switching up from very slow to excruciatingly fast- slamming, not two but three, fingers into her dripping cunt. for her it felt out of this world, waves of pleasure crashing all over her body that it seemed like she was being possessed, as you can tell by her legs shaking like crazy. your attention now back at her clit, instead of what you were doing previously, lightly sucking and circling, you licked with passion. it was messy- the way you ate her out, her juices dripping all over your face and dripping down to your chin, something that you could deem as pornographic because it was just that messy “mmmgod- fuck fuckfuck, y/n right there” unfortunately, you didn’t have the view of her face but you knew she would be drooling all over the table from having her cunt be abused.

“so- feels so good…” her moans alone cleared your mind, and you wanted her to scream out your name badly. you felt her walls clench around you harder, knowing that she was on the verge of orgasming you had two options; be mean and edge her, or let her cum all over your face and into your mouth…. the second option sounds way better.

“jungeun mmhm, you’re so close. let me take care of that” your jaw started to ache and your arms became sore, yet your will prevailed. wanting to see her unravel because of you was definitely worth the pain. “cum- cum for me jungeun”

curling your fingers inside of her sent her over the edge, she became breathless and so did you. the sounds of her squirming on the table and the ticking of the clock in the background were the only sounds that could be heard. you ignored the latter and focused on her only. somehow her hand finally made it to your wrist and tugged at the cuffs. then she became limp, as a joke you jerked your hand again which rewarded you with a squeak from her. standing up again, you gazed at her from above. sprawled out across you desk, her once straight hair becoming dishevelled, clothes wrinkled and more- the finest piece of art couldn’t rival such a view.

“um… are you okay? did i fuck you too hard” growing a tad bit concerned. she wasn’t getting up… you assumed she passed out from exhaustion since it was pretty late in the night and well you knew her from childhood so of course you knew she wasn’t able to stay up for much longer“fucks sake, eurgh okay… passed out in my office for what reason” you’re so glad she’s sleeping, or else she would’ve felt the kiss you planted on her forehead “stupid”

—

the next day she woke up in some stranger's bedroom. curious to where she was, she got up from the king sized bed only to find out she was half naked. anyone waking up half naked in someone's bedroom would obviously be scared as hell. she was shocked beyond belief? she knew she didn’t drink so why was she in-

“before you scream profanities in my house, i was the one who brought you home”

“WHATTHEFUCK? oh my bad you scared the living shit out if me… ah- did you at least dress me?”

“well yeah, did you think i would let my employees ogle at you?” you again, scoff at her, your tone less sarcastic than usual “alright come down before breakfast gets cold”

“you made breakfast for me?” the first time you’d see her blushing at you, it was cute but you couldn’t admit that to her face.

“not exactly me, my chefs made it, but i suggested some foods i thought you would like soo…” hiding your face in embarrassment “don’t look at me, please”

[moonisagremlin]

insane. TALK TO ME ABOUT YOUR HCS!! ( if you want to) i love spanish speaking mercs in general AWGH

ASDSFGGHGFGFDDDS @bimbombimbo LET ME GO FIND MY NOTES-

okay i found them :D keep in mind this is specifically about which Spain's regions they would be from (because, well, i'm spanish). Also, let's ignore TF2 takes place between 1969 - 1971 because, well, fascist dictatorship, y'know? (it is an interesting concept to further explore, but i'm not feeling like thinking about this rn. i'll make another post i think) ALSO these are mostly based around vibes and how i'm feeling (because headcanons are supposed to be fun).

Offense:

Scout - I couldn't decide between making him Madrileño (from Madrid) or Barceloní (from Barcelona) (but I honestly would ADORE making him from Barcelona so i'm most probably going for that one). I also couldn't choose to make him a cani or a pijo. (I am now realising the amounts of spanish slang i'm saying, so let me explain it to everyone who isn't from spain:

pijo means... umm, kinda like, spoiled rich kid who is kinda mean or an idiot. and cani means, umm... adidas tracksuit, cigarettes, alcohol, horrible music taste, being completely reckless, really disrespectful in general. idk, i think it is because both these kinds of people feel like thery're the best, like, they are really "chulos" and kinda brag about being bad people. i don't know it is so hard to explain slang, let me know if you kinda got the vibe that i'm explaining please thank you)

Soldier - Castellano-manchego. I will just say one thing: Don Quijote de la Mancha. If you don't know who this is, go read the book please, it is the best piece of literature ever, thank you.

Pyro - Extremeño or Murciano. A lot of people joke about Murcia not existing or being like, a Thaumiel SCP, and also about Extremadura being kinda weird(?. honestly, even i do not know that much about it, so yeah, i just think it is funny to make the character we know the least about in canon from the places that i know are kinda weird and unkown (unknown to me at least). I think I'm also leaning for Murcia more because my grandpa was from there and that's cool.

Defense:

Demoman - Gallego. I wanted to make him from Euskalerria, but I think Galicia is more similar to Scotland (and because doing a bomb joke is childish and they're not funny. people have died from terrorism and it is not something from a century ago, this is extremely recent). Anyways, both Scotland and Galicia have really green land, similar weather conditions, amazing culture, and are really unique in general. Also because my grandpa was from there and that's really cool.

Heavy - Vasco. I also didn't make Demoman basque because Heavy fits SO much better. It's, it's the vibes, man. I imagine he would have some trouble speaking spanish because he would be from such an isolated village in an already (geographically) isolated part of Spain that he would be kinda monolingual, mostly speaking basque and knowing some basic spanish. He would be SO connected with his culture, I swear I might do more research and do a whole post about the traditions he would like.

Engie - Andaluz. Andalucia is located in the south and the people there have really good vibes honestly. I think he fits because he's so nice and welcoming, and because I also think him being loud and having such a distinct accent would be amazing. And also I think he would love singing and playing and dancing flamenco. (UGHHHH I LOVE ALL OF THIS HEADCANONS I THINK I MIGHT DO A WHOLE AU DEDICATED TO THIS AAAAGAGAHAHAHHHHHHH)

Support:

Spy - This bastard is still giving me a headache. He's too french 😭. But seriously, I cannot choose to make him andorrano (and I know Andorra is a separate country from Spain but, idk), català (because at least ONE of the mercs was going to be from where I am from, y'know?) or make him catalan but specifically from la Vall d'Aran (a region where, apart from speaking spanish and catalan, aranès, a variation of the Occitan language, is spoken). Making him from la Vall d'Aran would be CRAZY because that would mean he speaks Spanish, Catalan, Aranese, AND PROBABLY FRENCH TOO BECAUSE IT IS RIGHT NEXT TO FRANCE. That would make him (almost) PLURILINGUAL since birth, and i think that is wayyy too cool. Also, IMAGINE IF SCOUT WAS FROM BARCELONA AND HE AND SPY COULD BOTH TALK IN CATALAN AND BOND THANKS TO THAT AND- IMAGINE THE DADSPY POTENTIAL AAAHAAAHAAAAAAAAAAA-

Sniper - Canario. He would be from the Canary islands because, yes. I don't really have a reason honestly, maybe similar climate to Australia? Or, idk, i think it would also be cool to make him have some kind of latin american ancestry because a lot of people from the Canary islands fled Spain during the Civil War and ended up in places like Mexico and Argentina and stuff, so that would be cool. Or I could make him straight up latino, which would fit him honestly. I don't really know, both options are really cool.

Medic - Mallorquí/Menorquí. From Islas Baleares in general. This is because A LOT of germans go on vacation there, to the point this is a huge meme in Spain. So yeah, I think it would be funny to make him balear with german ancestry I guess. He can speak spanish, german but also catalan (because catalan is also spoken there), but he has a really strong accent and sometimes Spy and Scout need to really focus on what he's saying to understand what he means. Seriously, if you hear MY western accent and compare it with a eastern balearic accent/dialect you would say they're NOT the same language because of how different it all sounds.

Bonus characters!

The Mann brothers, possibly the Admin?... blablabla, all of those people - Madrileños (from Madrid). The Mann brothers convinced Zepheniah to buy some land in the middle of Aragón and you know what happened.

Miss Pauling - Valenciana (from Valencia). Idk i don't wanna make everyone from Madrid y'know? And also guess what language she speaks apart from Spanish :)

Saxton Hale - Same thing as Sniper, I don't really know if he should be full latino or canario with latinamerican ancestry.

Merasmus - Idk. Portuguese? Andorran? Asturiano? Navarro? I don't know. Galician would be cool as fuck tho because there are a lot of legends and myths about magic and stuff and idk, i have a book about celtic witchcraft and i could read it i think.

Woah, this is a LONG post I am sorry. I hope you learned something about Spanish culture (which doesn't only surround about paellas and flamenco, please). And I hope I do some fanfics or fanart from this AU (can I call this an AU? i don't really know). And if anyone wants to adopt these headcanons or do a similar kind of post, you have my permission (even though you don't need to) and PLEASE, tag me if you make a fanart or something similar I would LOVE to see it <333

[yukasyukasyukasyukas]

Random valorant agents headcanons bc I'm sleep deprived

(this means I didn't get my 12 hours of sleep today)

Brimstone

Hugest ally on the VP (which, lets be honest, doesn't mean much since they're all gay)

First person KJ came out to and he was so emotional about it

Constantly tries to get the agents to get closer or at least respect each other but after Cypher mentioned how him and Breach treat one another he gave up

Calls some agents (Viper, Sage and Killjoy) by their first names on the everyday and calls Sova, Chamber and Deadlock (the other ex militars) by their last names

I wanted to hc him an American football team but idk any💞💞💞

Viper

Brimstone and Vyse are the only ones to call her Sabine bc they know her since before the "incident"

KJ also used to call her Sabine before the VP but Viper was bitter abt agents calling her by her first name

Scared for her life of failing Reyna, not because she actually fears her, but because she actually cares about Lucia

Older sister who lost contact with her family

Aroace

Has a snake named Viper that is older than the protocol

Omen

Is annoyed by people mistaking knitting with crochet

Very kind to the younger agents

In his own way though

Killjoy

Has an older sister who doesn't talk to her since she was a teenager

HOW DOES ONE BECOME THE LEAD OF A WHOLE DIVISION ON SUCH A HUGE CORPORATION AT THE AGE OF 18???!$+2+_(not a hc, just a concern)

The fact her dad died before she was born probably has something to do with her closeness to Cypher and Brimstone

Rich af but rents an apartment with another girl and that place is absolutely precarious

Pays the rent monthly even if she doesn't spend a single night there

Has a huge lesbian flag on the living room and that has gotten her very straight roommate into delicate situations with her boyfriends

Her roommate is Brazilian from São Paulo bc I want her to

Very easily impressed by anything Raze does even if it's something she can do a thousand times better

I feel like she would main a duelist if she played val, probably Reyna or Raze

Cypher

Has a picture of his wife and kids on his bedside table

He keeps Nora's favorite clothing and his children's baby toys

Girl dad obv

Killjoy reminds him of his oldest daughter and sometimes he calls her his daughter's name

Hates kingdom but since he joined the protocol he learned how to convive with their workers, even if he doesn't like it most part of the time

Scares little kids on Roblox for fun

Wouldn't mind having a relationship with a man but after Nora he can't imagine himself in another relationship so he doesn't give it a try

(I love him and Nora😭)

Sova

Calls the other agents by their first names

Was friends with Sage since before the protocol

Recommend Sage to Brimstone

One of the only coworkers Viper enjoys the company of

Once he tried to speak Spanish to mess around with Reyna and Raze swore he was speaking Portuguese bc of the accent

Trans bc I want to project into my fav characters

Morning walks

Sage

Calls everyone by their first names

Has two younger siblings but she hasn't had notice of them since she started the monk training

Misses them

Met Skye when researching about her healing powers, Skye was doing the same

Born radiant

Great at cooking but Jett gaslit her into thinking it was bad as a joke and she still believes it

After Harbor joined the VP she got back into cooking

Lesbian bc I said so

Not much close to the other women in the protocol, only Skye, Jett, Neon and Reyna

Closer to the men on the VP (Sova, Brimstone, Cypher, Iso, Omen etc)

Doesn't have a clue of why Clove doesn't like her

Phoenix

Nerd

This man is a canon theater kid, he absolutely LOVES musicals, specially Hamilton and Jett and Raze tease him Abt being British and liking it

Bi

For some reason Jett gaslights him into thinking he's actually gay, obviously never worked

Him and Jett break up for the most ridiculous reasons, they've already broken up more times than one can count on fingers

Banned from every kitchen he steps on

Learned Korean só Jett would shut up about her being bilingual while he only spoke English

Once he let Astra undo his dreads to give him braids, it was the saddest day of his life

Raze bullies him for his style💔💔💔💞

Jett

Can cook five stars dinners but insists on eating leftovers she finds on the fridge and steals from the other agents

Doesn't dare touching Chamber's "monstrosities of dishes"

Makes people their favorite dinner and a special breakfast on their birthdays

Cooks for the whole protocol on weekends

Most my hc surround on the fact she's always eating something and was a chef😔

Gaslights everyone into believing the most random and/or stupid things and has actually convinced Gekko that dog is a common dish in east Asia

First thing she asks every east Asian she meets outside of east Asia is if they eat dog

Sage was mad at her for this

Also bi

Reyna

Actually very caring and worried for most agents

Siblings relationship with Yoru

Randomly starts speaking Spanish to Sage just to annoy her

Learned Chinese just to mess around with Sage

Lesbiana

Flirts with Breach as a joke

Iso actually believed she and Breach were a couple when he arrived

Homophobic to Raze and Killjoy

Non ironically has offered to find Raze a better girlfriend than Killjoy

Wants to be a mother but can't because of her duties and Sage doesn't like children

Raze

BRAZILIPPINES

Hugest anarcocomunist

Grafitti artist

Has sent Kingdom, Killjoy and Viper dozens of blackmails before joining the protocol

Didn't like Killjoy for her first years in the protocol

Boombot was created as a "rebellion" from Killjoy's tech with an alarmbot that Kingdom placed near her house

Has a younger brother who is her absolutely whole world

Capoeira.

Breach

Actually speaks Portuguese very well

Dad jokes

Hates children and the only exception is Raze's younger brother

Please please please please please read the joke I posted😭

Didn't get along with Deadlock nor Chamber at first

Gets along well with Cypher, Harbor and Fade

Likes men and makes it everyone's business and is very annoying to homophobes about it (bi)

Has kissed Harbor once just to see the look of terror on a homophobic guy's eyes

Skye

Lesbian

Owes a personal gun that she uses to scare bigots and idiots in general

Was guilty about rejecting Yoru

Still is very close to him

Skyelock beloved

The ship name should be changed to Hiking Buddies or something

Can make a cat with her powers and it plays with Nightmare when it's starting to affect Fade too much

Closer to Fade than most agents think

Morning walks with Sova and Deadlock

Yoru

Has a huge knowledge on east Asian culture in general

Speaks ainu and a little uchinaguchi

Values culture and tradition more than his life

Constantly educating Jett on Korean traditions???

Mansplains a lot

Neon (single) teases him for being single

Has the "lesbian curse" in which every woman he likes is a lesbian and it's starting to develop into an "aroace curse"

Homophobic to Killjoy

Misogynist to Killjoy

everything you can think that is bad against Killjoy

And Reyna is with him on these

Astra

Pansexual

Nerd on physics

Knows a lot about quantum physics

That was me projecting, sorry

I need more astra content to make more headcanons 😔😔😔

Galaxsea/ astrarbor/ Neptune/ sea star

Born radiant

KAY/O

Doesn't actually have feelings, he's just programmed to make humans feel loved (besides, obviously, being a war machine)

It was a way of keeping the non radiant soldiers hopeful during the radiant war

He's a robot, of course he doesn't have feelings

Killjoy is absolutely fascinated by him and wonders if it was her who built him or at least made his project

The "hatred" he has for the radiants is also a way of keeping the non radiants feeling safe and appreciated

Sage is the exception from his radiant hatred because she's always appeared to be against Reyna's radiant dominant ideal world and he read that as a powerful ally to his cause

He's AI ofc he's gonna be a little dumb even though he's from like 2060

Chamber

I refuse to

Does he like men?

Was homophobic to Killjoy and Raze when they started dating and to Sage and Reyna

Was actually homophobic

Turned out he likes men???

I'm confused

I don't like him

Neon

BRAZILIPPINES

She probably knew Killjoy before the VP or at least heard about her not as an professional but as a person

Definitely likes women

Since she became a radiant at such a young age and os so powerful there were probably lots of accidents

Was mostly isolated from the outside for a long time before the thing that is sticked to her back was finished

That'd explain why she doesn't like making new friends, she doesn't know how to

Knows a lot of stuff involving quantum physics and science since her parents work at kingdom and she has worked with them

Fade

Constantly found sleeping on the floor

Sometimes she leaves Nightmare out of her bedroom to get a peaceful night of sleep

Goes to sleep on about the same time Skye is waking up

Fadelock goes hard too

You'll rarely see her awake but when you do she looks like she hasn't slept in a decade

Doesn't actually sleep, just take 30 min naps throughout the day

Took a while to stop calling Harbor "agent Batra" during missions

I just checked and that is lore inaccurate but idc

Likes men and women, never stopped to think of it as "oh, I'm lgbt" that's just one more small detail about her

Had a cat that her brother gave her when she was a kid, it died of kidney failure a few years before she joined realm

Harbor

History and architecture nerd

Also a philosophy enthusiast

Has a tattoo that says "Memento mori et memento vivere" and that's what caught Astra's attention at first

Him and Astra spend a lot of time just nerding around

He's very caring yet not much protective to the younger agents

Randomly throws water at people who walk by

Breach and Deadlock learned on the hardest way not to be around him with a glass of water

Calls Fade Hazel because at first he thought that was how it was and never corrected it

Older brother of two sister

Pansexual

Gekko

Grafitti artist

Is an only child but is very close to the children is his neighborhood

Gay

That guy looks so gay I'm gonna cry

Has a dog named Lizard

Him and Raze talk to each other in Spanish and Portuguese and it's an absolute nightmare for others to decifrate their alien language

Asked Sage if people actually eat dogs in Asia and was punished for a week, Reyna had lots of fun

Jett still teases him about it

She told Iso about that and every time Gekko asks him what he's eating he says it's dog

Him and Deadlock are actually chill about each other for as long as one doesn't cross the other's boundaries when it comes to his radivores

Deadlock

This woman doesn't have a drop of heterosexuality on her body

She thought she liked Iso but it turned out he was just the only one not asking her to get along with radivores and radiants

Hates when she's called by her first name

Lost contact with her family and legally got rid of her last name

Skye, Sage and Sova call her Iselin or Ise

Fadeskyelock(?)

Used to go on lots of missions involving radivores before the VP but after the polar bear she didn't trust herself near them again

Graduated in biology

She wanted to be a scientist when she was a kid

Used to be obsessed about radivores and radiance before the bear

Iso

Can't cook for his life

Used to think he liked Deadlock but it was just compulsory heterosexuality

Aroace

Not much close with most agents but Sage and Deadlock

Him and Raze are absolute nightmares to go in mission with, those mfs listent to music so loud they can't hear anything else

KJ was scared of him

Only listens to music that are on languages he doesn't speak

Raze showed him Brazilian funk and he started listening to it during missions

Clove

Don't give a shit if they're misgendered

The pet rock is to throw at those who insist that they're a woman even after they correct them

Sleeps the whole day and is awake during the whole night

Immortal, queer, sleeps during the day... Are they a vampire?!

Randomly dresses up fancy and stays on that fit for the whole day, they can be seen wearing a suit during missions in breeze

Spends all their time awake doing unproductive stuff

Vyse

Was a physicist and later got into engeneering

She can't really remember those last years before the scions took her

Was took by the scions by Omen but none of them know

Doesn't like Iso

Her and Viper used to be very close friends, their friendship cou be compared to Jett and Phoenix's, they were very spontaneous

The "incident" was something involving her but no one really remember how it was

Ace

Had a cat named Jaguar

[bravo4iscool]

girl, I’m not gonna lie to you, I have some free time, and sometimes I really like to use it uselessly. and I found your ig account, then I did some other research and I found a lot about you and your family, so I could really rate you. And yes, I can say properly: you’re ugly.

now, you're kinda right, I give you that. some fit guys do like fat women, maybe one guy out of ten. but these are REALLY PRETTY WOMEN, 'cause I don’t deny that there are beautiful fat women, but they are usually rare, and that’s definitely not you.

I’m not seeking validation wtfff has nothing to do with anything, girl… you seem stupid. I just really found your behavior hilarious. like, how the false illusion of the new age got you, making you really believe in fairy tales. I mean, you're clearly so insecure, trying to pass as “I’m fine with my weight” while really trying to convince yourself that you’re desirable. and like, you’re not 😭 and it’s so fun when you talk about validation, because, you see, I may be petty or bitter or mean, or whatever it is. but, if you really felt confident, pretty, and good about yourself, you would just turn off the anon or ignore me. but no, you’re here, writing answers so you can post and be consoled. that’s how I know you feel pathetic and horrible about yourself, and need these other weirdos to help you fool yourself. you can ignore me, or reply me, it won’t make difference. you too fucking transparent, so easy to read.

or you wouldn’t be doing headcanons of really fit men attracted to you, because if you were desirable and if you really felt that way, you would just know, and not try to reaffirm yourself along with other equally UGLY FAT GIRLS. the main thing here is how out of touch you are with reality. close the tumblr, go to a nice spot in your town, where you KNOW there are hot guys, and please record yourself being chosen by them. if you're so sure of yourself. and open your instagram account, since you have nothing to hide and being ashamed. I mean, you’re pretty right? lol

y’know i’m not doing this cuz i’m insecure💀 also, i never said those hc’s were about me LMAO. i’m very aware that he and every other cod character is fucking fictional💀. this is just my hobby😗✌🏼.

also, why are you so keen about finding out about my personal life? wtf do i have to do with you? it’s fucking creepy to stalk my ig and all that💀. who tf do you think you are?

the only one being pathetic here is you, because you’re out here insulting me via anon haha. at least grow the balls to confront me correctly lol.

but yk, your stupidity and insecurity is pretty hard to ignore. you can have your opinion about me but let me be. i didn’t ask you for it lmao. also, i couldn’t care less about your opinion. you can think i’m ugly, idgaf, but stop annoying me with it.

and idk if you know but talking down on other people has to do with one’s insecurities, so maybe you’re the insecure one here😘.

and yes, i’m fine with my weight. i’ve come to terms with it, since i can’t change it without a medical intervention. is it so hard to believe that someone overweight actually accepts that fact or what? it says that says a lot about you actually.

also, i’m posting this so people can see that there are, unfortunately, still people with the iq of a fucking brick out there. i couldn’t care less about what they tell me. as i said, i’m perfectly fine on my own.

i’m actually laughing writing this because i won’t ignore you. people like you should rethink their life choices ngl.

you’re going crazy over a tumblr post and start to insult me as fat and ugly and you started to fucking stalk me. you’re being the prime example for insecurity rn💀.

your messages can get as long as you want them to be, i will respond to them because it’s sad people still think like you.

there are people out there saying all things about cod or ghost or whoever. if i don’t like them, i scroll, but i don’t start insulting and stalking the author of that post/headcanon/fic or whatever.

grow tf up and get a helmet💀.

[verosikastrikerstellaexcuser]

i think im the only one who still cares about the von eldritch family, because ever since i got into hazbin thru the pilot, i always automatically thought, "oh, they must be the rulers of the envy ring since they look just like the morning star family intentionally (making themselves look similar to the most powerful family in hell out of envy), and because they look like eels/deep sea creatures!" along with the fact that yeah, the king of envy would probably want his son to date the princess of pride for power.

the concept of sins having kids since they probably have to be hundreds of thousands of years old now is a underutilized overall despite charlies existence, and i wouldve had less of a problem with beezlebub not looking anything like a bee she had a mom was the real beelzebub, and her dad was maybe someone like cerberus. maybe him being there could explain hellhounds too. i still hope leviathan doesnt end up being a surfer dude, because that archetype feels like the exact opposite of what envy is.

sometimes i just feel like the sins are made to be as subversive as possible like lucifer and bee, instead of actually researching into the real world lore behind these demons. maybe thats part of the reason i liked the von eldritch family being the rulers of envy too, because viv made them all on her own. shes better off just making characters to fit these roles in hell instead of trying to make pre existing demons fit into boxes of what she needs, and its another part of why i generally don't care for the goetia family. like, andrephlus has ice powers for no reason, despite being a peacock, a tropical bird, and vasago wears sunglasses? if octavia cant even wear her beanie when taking family photos and has to wear a crown instead, then why does he get to wear sunglasses all the time? is the ars goetia stupid? /j /ref

Very interesting insights anon!

I do get what you mean about the subversive thing. It works with Lucifer to me though I get why people hate it because it does make it a bit ??? That somehow he can rule over all these other powerful demons. I think Beel annoys me in particular because we already have hellhounds and furry carnivoran mammalian designs, couldn’t we please have gotten a genuine proper bee. She’s barely a bee and insects are under appreciated and cool. Bees are fucking cool, just let her be a bee she doesn’t need to be a fluffy furry… the lava lamp thing is interesting and fun, why can’t she be a lava lamp bee? Her being a fox just felt so unnecessary and it feels like it adds clutter. A fox bee lava lamp… one of those elements isn’t necessary. Bee because Beel and queen bee, being the ruler of a ring that makes sense. Lava lamp tummy because she burns food up so quick, ok cool. But fox? I get they’re cunning and raid chicken coops etc but like. There’s already the bee thing, and to make her a fox subtracts from the bee, so don’t bother then, keep the bee strong. And it’s fine for her to rule the hellhound ring imo because Mammon rules greed despite not being a shark so who cares… no one would have cared. Same with rooster Ozzie, the succubi aren’t chickens but no one minds it’s fine.

I think often that’s my biggest gripe with helluverse designs, at times they have extra clutter which could have just been left off and they’d be stronger for it. I definitely don’t dislike them like some people do, but yeah.

Also as an aside from what we’ve seen of gluttony it seems really quite luxurious, so honestly the hellhounds given how downtrodden they are, unlike wrath and the imps it feels kinda out of place? Unless maybe thats because the hellhounds body guard for a lot of celebs that live there or something and the hounds live in the less luxurious bits. If not then idk where would suit them better because we’ve not seen enough other rings. But yeah… the hellhound ring and Beel in general feel so clunky to me, idk.

I also agree very hard about the Goetia bird lore 😭 Stella’s apparently a swan, which is like. What? Look at her fucking BEAK! I’ve seen the headcanon she’s a secretary bird and I love it, a raptor that stomps lizards and snakes and mice to death? And then striker working under her? Please, that’s so much better.

Birds are warm blooded so there are plenty of artic and cold climate birds that could have been picked for Andre as well yes. There are other gamebirds that exist outside of peacocks that could have been a great pick.

[hotchs-big-hands]

I feel like it would take Aaron awhile to come around to doing kinky stuff. With everything he sees at work, the ways people use sexual things to hurt each other, he’s more into gentle missionary and love making. After months of begging and reminding him there’s a fun, safe side to all this he agrees to try a few small things. Then once he tries it he’s done for. After only a few experimental nights of things you like he’s completely committed. He buys books on kinks that the two of you go over with a fine tooth comb (lawyer style with notepads and the little arrow stickers, both color coordinated so you know who likes what 🤭). You make a list of things to try and Aaron has the time of his life checking things off of it. He carries it in his wallet (you can’t help yourselves, you try new things any time any place) and when he can’t get you off his mind at work he pulls it out and plans what to try next. He’s ordering toys and bondage gear every other week. He changes your phone contact name to “Princess” or “Daddy’s Girl” or even “Slut ❤️”. Man is obsessed. He’s also constantly blown away at the way he feels even more love for you now that he sees this side of you. He never realized how much trust and respect was needed to make kinky play, or hell by now it’s a lifestyle for you both, work and it makes him feel so special.

- 💖

Oh my god YES this is so true like I always think abt the fact that at first he just associates kinky stuff with what he's seen with his job (plus he and Haley were probably extremely vanilla at best ngl) but I love the idea of you and him sitting down together and just researching and documenting what you both like and wanna try 😭😭😭😭 idk that's kinda adorable actually KSKSKSSK he is the king of safe words and making sure you're completely comfortable throughout play with him, man does NOT mess around. When he approaches you the first time with a night planned for kinky sex he just adores the excited glimmer in your eyes and feels excited too 🥰🥰🥰🥰 man has never felt this desired in like... ever. He loves his pretty girl so so much 🥰🥰🥰 you ofc still have tender, gentle sex too but he's now more open to trying kinky things too!

[februarytodeath]

thinking abt the two most recent nevermore eps .....,.,, (cw spoilers + mentions of gore)

prospero and ada ..... there is so much to say about them ... but! what i mainly want to talk about is how ada's manifestation will change their relationship.

i think prospero will be in awe of ada now. he'd be terrified but fascinated by her new power. he wouldn't uh. like her though . i don't see these two ever having a positive relationship ahaha,, also! i think this will be the first time he'll see anyone other than annabel as an equal (maybe even a superior?).

and ada made a full 180 in these episodes omgg,,, future interactions are gonna be really fun seeing as she and prospero have sorta switched places,,

i wonder if ada's staying on annabel's team after this .... maybe not . either she'd be kicked out of she'd leave on her own .. i don't think she'd want to be associated with prospero anymore ahah

ADA'S POWER TO MAKE PEOPLE SEE THEIR FEARS AUGH..... i used to sorta understand why people love to see characters suffer but now... now i get it. go girlie fuck him up!!!! (yes i know they're both in the wrong though prospero is . slightly more justified . just let me have this HDGHSHDS)

prospero's fear hallucination was really interesting ,, and uncomfy😭 but we do finally get more insight into what his life was like! judging by his reactions, he's reliving his final moments,, actually driving me insane how it wasn't supposed to happen to him ("you've got the wrong—")

the scene looked like a medical procedure rather than an execution ,, why were they about to cut him open ,, i would do research but i don't know how exactly i'd look up cutting people open in the 14th century haha. i'm assuming when they sliced him they hit his heart rip

equally important is his amputated hand . was his hand actually amputated before he died or did that just appear because he feared the cut getting infected?

OHHH ALSO... both prospero and montresor were both restrained at the time of their deaths (prospero being held down while being operated on + montresor being tied to the tracks) .... idk what this means or if it means anything i just like finding silly parallels

also! no thoughts just will :3c i missed him so much ,,, this is the first time we've seen a full body drawing of him in the comic i think whgdhsds

hehe . the silly

[luffyvace]

AAAAAAA I WANNA GIVE YOU A BIG PLATONIC SMOOCH I LOVE YOUR WORK SO MUCH

ok ok recently I have been infected with eustass kid and was hoping you could write for him with a male reader nothing specific I feel like he would be so angry if his testosterone filled crew made fun of him for it. Love your work ❤️

AWWW THATS SO SWEET OF YOU DEAR! 💗

PLATONIC KISSES 😚😚

thank you so much!! I’d love to write for you but I simply don’t know much about kid!! I’m on the marineford arc- 😭😭 I usually turn down characters I don’t know much about him but you seem like such a sweetie! After having done some research..Here ya go!~

As stated I’ve chosen to research as much as possible in fandom and other’s headcanons! This may not be the most accurate but I sincerely hope your satisfied with my attempt dearest!~

I feel Kid would think of food as a sort of affection

so technically gift giving??

but it’s like his love language is food

his favorite is cabbage rolls right?? Welllll he loves to eat them together!

not…together together

he buys it for y’all separately

I doubt he’d want to share his favorite food 😭

if you beg for his in a case where he didn’t get you some...

“what?! No! This is my food get your own!….ugggghh FINE! You get a half! This was supposed to be for me”

(● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾

I also feel he’d be better off witth someone who’s either all for his rambunctiousness or (somehow) able to calm him down (like killer)

if your just as reckless as him great! Your adventures are now considered dates :)

not necessarily, but he’s fond of them as if they are

he’s always recalling on past times you’ve fought together

you know how people say someone you’ve fought a war with knows you better than a friend?

yeah, I feel like that’s why he has such high respects for his crew

And of course because they’re his crew

so yeah he feels closer to you every time you fight together

if you want you can listen to the song ‘one thing’ by amerie- the lyrics remind me of him idk why (keep in mind I don’t know this guy well :3)

kid would allow you to ride on his shoulders

you could just kinda hop up there casually and he won’t say anything

privileges

but I feel like if he’s in a foul mood or busy he’d grab you buy the waist and sit you down somewhere LOL

another way to spend time with him would be to do your make up at the same time (if you wear it)

(love that it’s casual for men to wear make up in one piece)

he seems like he would be anal about his so you’d be doing your own and he does his, but it’s still fun to do it together

he’s kinda like that with most things

which now that I realize it that could count as quality time

so the conclusion I’ve come to?

his love languages are gift giving or quality time

but thinking about it now I feel he may also do acts of service

now this isn’t as intentional

he just takes pride in likes to help you with things he knows he could do better

aw man you broke your ___? Well I’m sure he could fix it! 😼💪

If you initiate physical touch his reaction will range based on where you are/who’s around and how much it is

if there’s barely anyone/no one around and you give him a peck on the cheek? Fine. He’ll just half smile at you

if it’s a public area and your trying to kiss him on the lips? “Cut it out! Don’t get distracted we’re here to (xyz)!”

he can’t display the weakness of not being masculine

besides he hates cute n’ cuddly crap 😒

he’d be so proud if his boyfriend physically strong

It even boosts HIS ego

especially since your his ♥︎

he takes care of you in subtle ways

such as making sure your eating, not over working and getting enough sleep

”hey! I haven’t seen you eat all day! Get in the kitchen and tell killer to make ya’ somethin’!”

”how long have you been at that!? Get up and come over here!”

”what on earth are ya’ still doing awake?! Go to sleep! Captains orders..”

killer occasionally asks how your relationship is going

kid’ll tell em a few things but he tries not to get sentimental

trust that’s a lot more than what he tells other people..”

”screw off! mind your own business..”

this is really random but he seems like the type of guy who’s always grumbling

idk I just had to say it..

would enjoy headrubs (IN PRIVATE)

and it has to be casual, don’t baby him about it :P

”your hairs’ really fluffy/soft” *casual headrubs*

like that

you have to compliment stroke his ego so he won’t get angry then pat him

to be more specific about reader being a male :

Even if you don’t hc kid to be straight (idk what i hc him to be idk em enough)

his ego is HURT when he realizes he’s in love with you

love?! What is such weakness?! such DISEASE?!

the fact that he’s in the lgbtq bc of one guy kinda makes him angry

cuz like now (some) people are gonna categorize or even ridicule him for even liking you

even though he’s angry about it, it’s not for the same reason

he’s upset because he fell weak to love in general

homophobes may be upset because he likes a man

what does it matter?! He sure never cared..

you can tell the first thing this guy sees is NOT gender

it’s—threat? Or no threat?

so ya- essentially what I’m saying is he doesn’t care for gender- except when it comes to homophobes

then he’s angry 🙂☝️

and as for his crew making fun of him?!

oh he’s absolutely livid. 😄💥

”SHADDUP’ YA STINKIN’ MAGGOTS! I AM NOT WEAK!!”

Actually- they didn’t call him weak. That’s just what he hears 😂

btw that is not what he said I censored it bc I headcanon him to have a potty mouth (and I don’t)

his skin and hair is the same color from how angry this dude is

HE’S LITERALLY LIKE ‘😡’

HAHAHAH

He always storms off whenever they bring up his ‘sOft SpOt” for you 😋

he’s not even soft really he just goes out of his way to do stuff for/with you

its not they’re business anyway?!

right killer?!

while I was researching I saw that the flower he resembles is a tulip! That’s my favorite flower!! 🌷♥︎♡

Enjoy! I did my best 😅

[vintagepresley]

imma be honest the priscilla movie didn’t help at all with the hate for elvis. (i think) priscilla’s intention was to clear things up, but idk about sofia. it seemed like she had an agenda and that was successful lol. but anyways…. the way social media has become a pile on elvis and call him a “monster” “groomer” “pedo” whatever breaks my heart. if he was such a monster, why were him and priscilla practically best friends after the divorce? if she was his victim, why does she defend his name and call him the love of her life? he was by no means perfect but he was such a good person that was just complex (like all of us) and it makes me mad seeing how his impact in the music industry isn’t rlly the focus, but the women that were in his life are. it makes me mad knowing that he was such a private person yet all his “dirty laundry” was exposed by those close to him and now it’s used against him. even his like for white panties is used to make him seem gross when there’s definitely “weirder” bedroom/sexual preferences…. also like why did we even need to know that? lol … he felt like he couldn’t rest while he was alive and now he’s constantly shitted on even though he’s been dead for over 40 years . it’s not fair.

I agree. The Priscilla movie didn’t help at all with the way the haters see Elvis because it obviously just fueled their hate for him. I like to think and have an open mind that she did have good intentions with wanting to clear things up and wanting to put out another movie because she didn’t like the other one from the 80’s. But as you said Sofia had clear intentions of what she wanted to do with that film and it was obvious from interviews with her and Priscilla and how different they described the movie and how they saw it. To the point that I’m like is this the same movie? It was clearer with who she even casted to play Elvis. This super talk guy who’s known for playing an asshole with this super tiny girl making her look even more like a child just to cater to the haters. It’s annoying.

I agree if he as such a monster to her as people claim or that she’s been groomed or whatever else they say why were they holding hands while getting divorced? Why were they still so close? It’s one thing to make things work for your child and you can do so without being as close as they still were to the point that he’s having late night conversations with her. Atp no matter what she says to stop people from hating him they will still be like “she’s been groomed so she can’t see he’s a monster” lol

I also agree that people tend to focus more on his relationships with women who’ve been in his life than they do him and his career and the incredible impact he’s made. Like yes these relationships may be a little important but they aren’t everything. He was more than just the women he dated or had flings with. It is messed up that almost every person in his life has shared such imitate or private details about his life that I’m sure he wouldn’t want anyone to know. Underwear thing definitely is not that weird and idk why people are acting like there aren’t weirder things out there lol

But yeah, it’s wild that no matter what people are just going to hate him and make fun of him and call him racist and a pedophile because they don’t want to do the actual research themselves about things.

Cause I swear the next person I hear call him a racist or he stole music IM READY TO SLAP. It’s called cover songs people. It’s still a thing today. He just did it better, lol. 😭