#id really like other's opinion on this because i think i genuinely want to write something about it.
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straight men really fascinate me. why do they love being gay with each other
#like it starts in middle school with bits but it evolves as they near their mid 20s. it grows more. not sincere exactly#but something like that. does it have to do with the limitations on platonic affection that they're allowed to express?#at least in comparison to women? they can't hug or hold hands so they have to kiss and talk about sucking each others dicks 'for the bit'#or does it simply stem from some sort of weird evolved form of homophobia? Gay Men Funny?#it really is interesting to me i want to study them like bugs#idk. im queer and autistic and trans and don't Get Things and sometimes i'll watch the guys in men's choir interact#and other times i'll watch supermega. as i am right now#id really like other's opinion on this because i think i genuinely want to write something about it.#garfs barfs
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Just finished playing Mouthwashing and I just wanna leave my character opinions in this post. OBVIOUS SPOILER WARNING!!! Curly: Lovely character. I adore his characterization of being unable to do anything until it's too late. He stood on the sidelines for too long and was only given the option the stay on the sidelines for the rest of his life. That moment when he goes to confront Jimmy and the screen starts lightly shaking and starts flashing the "Kills 99.9%" to signify his utter rage and contempt for Jimmy at that point? Adore it. I don't think he's as horrible as people say. He had no malicious intent, but that ironically caused his downfall. He was too passive and that led to the failure of the crew and became a victim to Jimmy's twisted delusions. Swansea: MY GLORIOUS KING!!! I love his whole roundabout character. He's so three-dimensional. I adore him for accepting his flaws and genuinely being able to "Take Responsibility". His relationship with Daisuke, being the hardened man scorned by the world and wanting to make sure Daisuke didn't end up like him was so beautiful. The fact that he doesn't get mad at Daisuke for crawling through the vent and getting hurt because he knew he just wanted to help made me tear up. He's so incredible. Plus he can canonically throw it back, which is always a plus.
Daisuke: What an amazingly tragic character. A kid who feels useless and wants to help in any way he can, even if that means putting himself in harm's way. I love how he attempts to remain positive and cares about the other crew members. Even in his one moment of grief where he discusses his fear of disappointing others, it's never about himself. In his couple last scenes, he even talks about his mom and hopes she won't feel guilty. It's incredible. Anya: Oh, where do I even begin with Anya? I love her. Her whole character is tragic, but those profound moments where she's with Curly, where she's comfortable and we get to see her true self come out, it's so beautiful. She jokes around, gets intense about board games, and is even a bit energetic and passionate about nursing, but most of all, she's just a sweet person. She's incredibly skilled at keeping Curly alive after his incident. She keeps everything calm while Jimmy is away. Her grief and response to Jimmy's actions towards her are sad and I will absolutely admit that I cried after I found out she died and had to step away for a bit because she just was such a genuinely beautiful person. I wish we got to see more of her and I really wish we get to see more of her in the future. Easily my favorite character. I love her so much AAUGH!!! The fact that her and Curly's ID cards are always covered by Jimmy's in that ID card segment is so sad. I could make a whole post on Anya. I love Anya. 11/10. Need more Anya. Jimmy: Wonderfully written. I have never hated a person, let alone a fictional person, more in my life that when this fucker was on my screen. A horrible person. A genuinely irredeemable asshole who does nothing but bring the crew down with him. As much as I would adore making a whole rant post about him, it's 2:00 AM as of writing this and I wanna sleep. So basically; Fuck Jambalaya or whatever his name is.
#mouthwashing#character analysis#curly mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#i hate jimmy#jimmy sucks#captain curly#anya mouthwashing#i love anya#anya best character#incredible character#I need more anya#i adore anya#anya means so much to me#anya is incredible#anya is stupendous#anya is gorgeous#anya 11/10#i'm gonna stop tagging this now#...#anya is beautiful#okay now im done
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i honestly find it beautiful how love/attraction can transcend the 3D. like, imagine being in love with someone from another reality and knowing that they love you too? isn’t that lovely??
for example, i wasn’t planning on ever having a s/o for my dr. i was planning on just shifting to my dr and living life normally, possibly without interfering with the plot of my dr.
then, a month or so after i started writing my script, i started getting signs from her through my social media feed and through content related to my dr, so i decided to learn more about her and such. i didn’t officially add her as a s/o to my script, but i had written down that it was a possibility. i didn’t know what i was walking into, and didn’t know if it would work out.
eventually i took a break from shifting, id say almost a year. didn’t look at that dr script often or interact with content about my dr. in 2023 i decided to start shifting again, and almost immediately i started getting an influx of content related to my dr, primarily of my now s/o. i didn’t really look at the script for my dr and instead focused on another one, with another s/o.
id never get signs from this s/o. it was always her :> i knew that my old s/o was a quiet and reserved person so i figured it was related to that, but since i had come out i didn’t want a male s/o anymore and no longer shift to that dr. so i started focusing on her/my dr again. (this is just my personal opinion but since i identify as a lesbian i didn’t want to change my sexuality for someone else, this reality or not. just what i’m comfortable with.)
and then.. the signs just got more clear. constantly i would see things related to my s/o- her name, her nickname, things related to my dr, tarot readings that resonated with us both, and more. atp i started associating the angel numbers 111/1111 with her simply because they would always show up with signs from her.
started channeling her shortly after, but i’m still trying to get the hang of it so i prefer sending her letters instead :> usually i’ll ask for her to show me something as a sign or use it as a yes/no sign, but i just like updating her on how i’m feeling. and yes, she tends to deliver with signs. as of now she’s impatient since i haven’t channeled or reached out in a while, so she’s needing attention :> i think she’s also been impatient since i haven’t shifted yet but have gotten very close to, since this week every reading i’ve done/had done by others has said she needs attention and that she misses me a lot.
but, i think it’s genuinely crazy that i wasn’t planning on having a s/o or anything similar. the only reason why i do now is because she reached out first 😭 otherwise i’d be bitchless right now. shifting truly is a lovely thing.
#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifting#shifting community#desired reality#shifting methods#permashifting#respawn#reality shift#shifting realities#4d reality#respawning#current reality#shifting antis dni#shifting diary#anti shifters dni#shiftinconsciousness#shifters#shifting blog#shift
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Hi Sam. A potentially stupid question. Image descriptions for screen readers. Do they work the same way for audio and video? As in are they needed or helpful? I'm finding conflicting answers when I search for this.
Not at all a stupid question! I think sometimes it can vary by community, to be honest.
Screen-reader users, visually impaired folk, and others for whom IDs are particularly relevant, feel free to chime in; I'm going to ramble and you likely have more useful stuff to say. Remember to do it in reblogs or notes, as I don't post asks sent in response to other asks.
I'm not visually impaired, and I don't use a screen reader and thus am not really able to speak with firsthand authority. In the past, when I've asked, I've heard that in-post text is better than alt-text for images; even if that stops being the case, I prefer to use in-post text because there are people who aren't screen-reader users who also like the IDs. I do too, actually. And generally I've heard that video as well as image should be described. I don't do straight audio generally, but when I do, if it's a song I don't bother because the title is there and lyrics are googleable, if it's speech I like to see/give a transcript.
I like when videos have descriptions especially, because I am almost never in a position to play a video I see on my dash. If the video doesn't autoplay I don't want to hit play because then it will load with audio and I'm usually either a) somewhere I can't have audio or b) already listening to something and unwilling to turn it off. If the video autoplays it's muted, but if it's audio-heavy there's the same issue. So if someone posts a video without a description/transcript, unless it has captions, I can't engage.
There are a lot of guides out there for how to write IDs and I kind of think, based on conversations I've had, most of them are bullshit by people who don't use screen readers. In my experience, which is not universal but is relatively comprehensive, people who can't see an image often do not want a precise objective description as we're instructed to provide.
There's a great essay that touches on this, Against Access, where the writer, who is Deafblind, talks about how he doesn't want a diagram, he wants an emotional evocation.
Why are you telling me, telling me, telling me things? Your job isn’t to deliver this whole room to me on a silver platter. I don’t want the silver platter. I want to attack this room. I want to own it, just like how the sighted people here own it. Or, if the room isn’t worth owning, then I want to grab whatever I find worth stealing.
I've had people get shitty with me about putting "feelings" into my IDs, but the majority of people for whom those IDs are necessary have told me they like it because, for example, saying "She looks like she's about to commit violence" is a subjective opinion but conveys something that "A woman is standing with arms upraised and a frown on her face" does not. And if you're describing an image but there's not a ton of meaning to it, describing it in clinical detail is wasting time. A paragraph describing a fortysomething white guy and all the clothing he's wearing and the room he's in is not as helpful, on occasion, as simply saying "This is a photograph of me in my bedroom." It depends on context, which is your call to make, and the only way to get good at that is to do it.
But again: this is my experience with my readers, and even John Lee Clark, quoted above, doesn't speak for his whole community. So I would suggest that the best way to get an answer for this is just to ask your readers what they'd prefer. If you have friends who use screenreaders, ask them. If you don't, or if you don't get a response from your readers, I would do what you feel is best until someone tells you otherwise, and then be gracious and discuss it with them so you can better understand their needs. In my experience, when someone is genuinely trying to make a more welcoming space for disabilities -- as opposed to making virtue-signal attempts to Be The Perfect Ally -- they get a lot of slack when they don't get it exactly right. It is better to make a welcoming space for people to feel safe telling you that you fucked up than it is to pretend you're never going to fuck up.
So yeah, as someone who is more or less fully sighted, that's my two cents, but if you really want to know what your readers want, you know...I'd ask them. :) Good luck, either way.
#disability#image identification#lord knows I'm not perfect with mine#but I like to think generally I'm responsive to need instead#which is more important
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Curious what you'd say about Soap for the character ask game. You haven't really spoken about him as much as the others so I'm curious :O (id love to hear about every single character tho i wont lie to you but i have a feeling you'll get asked about those lol)
@nekrosmos asked for Soap too.
Honestly? There is unfortunately a reason. I lingered around fandom for a good few months before I got involved at all. I saw some behaviour from his fanbase that I didn't like and so I made the conscious choice that he's not a character I'd probably be creating much for. I love the art, happy to support creators, etc. Besides, there are so many delicious, delicious rarepairs to love and create for and plenty of gallant, productive, devoted Ghoapers.
He's quite compelling though, and I've got quite a few thoughts and headcanons, and I'm happy to write prompts with him. A few friends on Discord really love him and I like to create for them too, cause happy friends give me the fuzzies. So, you know, a story idea might grip me by the balls and I'll wack out a long form thing.
favorite thing about them
His journals.
Reading those finally gave me a connection with his character that I hadn't developed previously. But they really show how driven he is, how much he wants to be the best he can be, so he's not a burden, so he doesn't let anyone down. He's constantly striving to earn his place to the point that it kills him in the end.
I think he genuinely struggles with wanting to be liked (as part of 'earning his place'), and I think he is often too much for people. Ghost giving back as good as he gets is a comfortable relationship because the line for Ghost is way, way in the distance; Johnny doesn't have to worry like he does with 'normal' people. Neither of them is fuckin' normal.
Price giving him a chance would have been the first step towards the hero-style worship he has for him. "What? Me? Ye want... me? Aye, aye I will be the best fuckin' dog ye ever had, I will bite my own leg off for ye." Everything Soap does is to prove that Price didn't make a mistake. That he was a good investment. And Price, the sly fucker, knows it. He sees himself there.
least favorite thing about them
I wish they had given him a stronger accent and leaned more into that in the games. In fact, I wish that for all of them.
I also think that Soap has capacity to cause great harm without even realising it. Like, we get glimpses of it; he's nearly court-martialled for punching out a copper. In his single-minded pursuit of something, I reckon there could be a lot of collateral damage.
He lacks confidence but will cover it up by being an arsehole and doing arsehole things (such as smuggling a girl on base to impress The Guys). I say I like "least favourite"; I think this makes him compelling as a character. He's not all sunshine and rainbows. He's just as gritty, professional and flawed as the rest of 'em.
favorite line
"You sick bastard..."
"My kingdom for a suppressor..."
"Price?... This belongs to you, sir."
brOTP
Gaz & Soap
OTP
Uh... none really. Ghost/Soap?
nOTP
Don't have any strong feelings on any.
random headcanon
He's really bad at team sport. He showed no interest in any when he was growing up. Gym? Running? Swimming? Anything where the only competition is himself and his own limits? That's where Soap's head is.
unpopular opinion
Honestly? I don't know which of my opinions would be unpopular. Probably the 'not sunshine and rainbows' one, maybe?
song i associate with them
favorite picture of them
#johnny soap mactavish#cod#call of duty#dunno is this too negative for his tags?#let me know i guess
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"# i think If you want a genuine critique of Batman then Leslie and her pacifism is far more interesting"
So true. Unfortunately nobody's been writing her well since the 90s or '00s. At least, I didn't come across anything featuring her in a well thought out way.
I'm split on counting War Games because 'she would not fucking do that' as people say. However, it is her position on morality taken to the twisted extreme. Still, intentionally killing or faking it, is very emotionally hurtful, like trauma inducing hurtful. Both for Steph and the Batfam and her mother.
Looked up the exact definition of pacifism and, well:
"Pacifism is a policy or doctrine of rejecting war and violence in solving disputes"
She kinda did use violence (emotional and body violating and zero consent from removing Steph from her life) to solve a dispute. Or to "free" Steph of her bat-duties, but it still counts.
Would love for Leslie to go after other batfam members and not just Bruce and argue with them about their methods.
Actually i think Stephanies death, either by medical negligence or a failure of her support system, is a natural consequence of Leslies brand of pacifism and while “She, personally, might not fucking do that” her philosophy might so its not as ooc as id like it to be.
So to discuss Leslie i think i have to establish two things 1. She suffers from being a (mostly) anti Batman character in a Batman comic* and
2. She and Jason are actually on two ends of a spectrum, with Leslie being “it is better to be the victim of violence then the perpetrator of it” and Jason being “it is better to enact unspeakable violence then be the victim of it”. With Bruce in the middle like “can we please get some nuance in here can we please get some fucking nuance” which is. Very funny actually.
(Its funny because Bruce, by being Batman, has basically decided to become the nuance - he will be violent for you, and by being so good at violence he can minimize the amount of actual violence needed)
So by letting Steph die, Leslie is essentially saying “no amount of violence can save us, isnt it better to die then without having inflicted it upon others?” Which is so very Ghandi of her, but also fucking insane and yeah Bruce was 100% right to never trust her again after that.
She is also - ok so the thing is, in-universe, being a teenage vigilante is. It’s basically like being a dance kid. Its going to have a profound and everlasting effect on the kids mental and physical health, there are side effects we still don’t entirely understand, but for the most part its just. Something some kids do!! Some of them insist on doing it (dick, damian (<-i have thoughts about why Bruce didnt want to give Damian robin ok) some of them realize it isnt good for them but cant really give it up (jason, maybe tim?) some of them are in it just for their stage moms (cissie king-jones) and some of them suffer long term consequences due to insufficient parental supervision (kon, pre-nu52) etc etc. Leslie is the mom in the corner who thinks allowing her kid to perform or even learn ballet in a studio is a slippery slide to abuse. She thinks no kid should ever be in that environment, and by Bruce allowing Dick to do so, despite Bruces reluctance in the matter and almost oppressive supervision, he has doomed an entire generation of kids.
She is never going to criticize anyone else in the batfam, because to do so would be admitting that kids have agency beyond what adults believe is best for them, and admitting that means being unable to push her “correct” views upon them.
Leslie is actually a pretty good stand in for fandom in that way; refuses to allow anyone but Bruce agency and independent thought, refuses to place blame anywhere but Bruce, insists a difference of opinion is grounds for dismissal of personhood and respect, and believes Gotham would be better off if Batman never existed.
(Once again i have no idea if i answered your question/addressed your ask. Sorry)
#asks#leslie as the real world stand in actually works really well#i do have to clarify that i like her!! irl i would probably agree with her#but this is a power fantasy not irl
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Listed below are some Spiderverse hot takes/controversial opinions I have that'd id like to ramble about
I wish Gwen and Pavitr were overweight. Like midsized. I'm very happy we got a heavier *young* girl on the team with Margo at least, but I'd like there to be a heavy *young* guy. I noticed that Pav is certainly not as petite as Miles is, but that's more of a flex for how skinny Miles is, it's not really saying that Pavitr is chubby. And Gwen, idk I always just draw her as heavier. It just suits her better and again we need more mainstream skinny x fat/overweight ships. I've never drawn Pav yet but if I happen to I'm drawing him heavier too.
I don't think Miles and Gwen were about to kiss before Rio interrupted them at the water tower. Everyone thinks this was what the scene was trying to implybutI don't think that's what would've happened at all. The camera was zooming in and the two of them were getting dangerously close to each other, they were definitely going to get more intimate, Miles was definitely looking at her lips and thinking of sssssomething, but they were not gonna KISS. They would've gotten real close and quiet, maybe held hands, then realize what they're doing and then break apart all awkward and embarrassed. And like, it's not just that i don't think the scene leading up to a kiss, I don't want that to have been the case. It's shallow, these two were SO not there yet. Gwen was not even fully in love with Miles yet. "But they're teenagers that's just normal teen friskyness, man 🤷♂️" Yeah I know, I've watched teen romcoms. We don't need to apply all the cliches to Ghostflower.
Not a huge fan of whenever people write Miles and Miguel becoming like a sweet, surrogate son and father dynamic post-BTSV. If you want your found family tropes and you wanna give Miles a secondary daddy besides. his actual daddy, Peter B is right there 🤷♂️. Yeah I know ATSV wrecked their relationship but idk I personally headcanoned a whole mini arc for them to reconcile in my mind that I love, it's easy. Just play with the potential drama that's already sitting there.
Ok so. This is more of a complaint against like, the original conception of the character, obviously there's nothing the movies could do about it. But. I don't like the name Miles very much. Idk i...do y'all ever love a fictional character and then like, pay close attention to their name, and go "hey uh, I actually don't think that name suits the character." Naming a character is like a whole process for me, I take character names very seriously. The name "Miles" just sounds too...unsentimental. Like they (Miles' original creators) wanted to name him something cool and hip. I just. Idk! I feel like he should've been named something else. Certainly nothing generic, but something more personal or meaningful, at least cute! I mean like at this point I'm used to the name and it's like, whatever, doesn't change anything for me. But still it's just a gripe I have. Idk does anybody feel this way. I'm genuinely curious.
I am saying both this as a Hispanic and someone who likes Miguel O'Hara that I never found the ATSV script describing Miguel as animalistic or beast-like to be offensive. The guy was running on all fours and had talons and was trying to bite people. Because he's part vampire. They were literally just describing his actions as they appeared in the movie. He was literally behaving feral, he's not full human. He's a spider man. Now onto George. Now I hate when a white man's actions are sugar coated to appear less severe than when the same actions are committed by a person of color, I really hate it. But the script isn't gonna use "animalistic" vocabulary to describe George pointing a gun at his daughter. It's pig-headed, certainly. But like, George can't run up walls with claws or smash through metal, he's just an awful guy with a gun. It requires different vocabulary than "feral." this is all like, just sort of circumstantial.
Bro imma be real. Ay. Aaaahhhhhhhghh, esto si lo odio. I'm sorry. I hate it when people write Miles and Gwen to be Mayday's godparents/uncle and aunt. I've seen people do this. I've read BTSV prediction fics that write in this moment where Peter B will...declare Miles and Gwen--PRESENT DAY Miles and Gwen, as in. 15-16 yr old Miles and Gwen--as Mayday's godparents. ????????? Peter, Miles and Gwen are young enough to be Mayday's siblings??? You think of Miles like your son (oh and you SUCK as a self-appointed dad btw sorry not sorry). Idk it's just silly to me. Like why do you as a middle aged man give legal guardianship over your daughter to two high schoolers if you die. I don't. What even are you, Peter. lol
The character "acting"--aka the way the characters' facial expressions and body language are animated--in ATSV is worse than it was in ITSV. I noticed this before, but it becomes so much more obvious when I watch the two movies back to back. It really stinks because I just KNOW this is a direct result of the crunch the crew went through. You cut corners when you crunch. Things get overlooked when there's no time. You don't have time to polish. It's the one obvious way that the poor working conditions during production actually shows. I mean, the character acting in the first movie was amazing. That part when Miles is being choked by the Prowler. The part when he removed his mask, when Aaron turns off the thermal sensor vision in his cowl to actually look at his nephew and you see Miles just broken. His eyes already start welling up with tears and his lip quiver. Man and that's just one example. ATSV's character acting...it's good! Overall. It has its moments when the expressions are amazing, certainly, just as good as the first movie. But they're fewer. The Right to Remain Silent scene, the scene where Miles has the vision at the Spider Society, that little moment where Miles smirks at Gwen out the window, all two times Gwen smiles, all of Hobie's body language, that face Gwen makes when Rio warns her not to break Miles' heart, Gwen's speech to her dad when she returns to her universe, there's a lot of great ones. But then...there's like, a lot of frames where characters look weird. Have you seen how many times a character looks off??? Like if a character's face is just a little far away the model looks weird. Like look at this shot--look at Gwen.
In the actual scene, she says "Peter?", but why is she so...unanimated??? It's like, she's moving, yeah. Her mouth moved. She blinked. But it's so minimal. Her animation is not conveying enough emotion. Honestly, the weaker character acting is another one of the big reasons I really hope they're not crunching Beyond the Spiderverse. That movie should be ALL the feels, and I want characters to be emoting properly and fully, and for the animators to have the TIME to do that ETHICALLY. You see what happens when they ARENT provided with that LUXURY.
#spiderverse#atsv#across the spiderverse#gwen stacy#spider man: across the spider verse#miles morales#ghostflower#gwiles#gwen x miles#miguel o'hara#peter b parker#spider man 2099#atsv Miguel#atsv miles
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robyn’s tiktok ab ppl being pissed ab feminine sirius just cracked me up dude IT’S SO TRUE!
“canon sirius would never wear that” Y’ALLLL this is fanfiction😭 i’m sorry to break this to you but canon sirius is NOT REAL BRO HE DOESN’T HAVE AN OPINION
i think it’s funny to think about how more canon compliant interpretations of the characters would react to fanon as like a THOUGHT EXERCISE but why is sirius in a skirt hurting your feelings rn
the main argument i hear about it is that it’s reinforcing heterosexual norms for wolfstar & like i kind of get where ppl are coming from w/ that ig but also i’m sorry I DON’T CARE! the marauders is such a gay fandom i really don’t see why people are hurt by people exploring sirius’ gender expression. idk i’m having trouble putting into words exactly why that argument doesn’t sit right w/ me but it really doesn’t. there are just so many different gay experiences out there to write about & if you want to read a different dynamic for wolfstar there’s plenty out there! it just feels like a lame excuse to hate on people.
maybe i just need someone to explain it to me in depth more but i struggle to see what the harm in writing a fic where the wolfstar dynamic resembles a lot of heterosexual relationships because that is a thing that happens in gay relationships & it doesn’t make them any less gay?? i feel like i must be missing the point of the argument but i also think a lot of people making the argument couldn’t even elaborate on why it’s a problem. i’m sorry i feel like some people are just repeating what they’ve heard online because they want sirius to match their own hcs.
okay that last paragraph might be a bad take i’m just genuinely confused BUT I THINK A LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE ARE TOO! & that doesn’t stop them from leaving hate comments on beautiful fan art where they think sirius looks too feminine for their taste😭 id love to hear someone who has like a fully formed opinion speak on this though
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𖹭𓂃 ࣪˖ saying no
something ive struggled with for pretty much my entire life 😭
𐙚๋࣭ people pleasing:
a person who consistently strives to please others, often sacrificing their own wants or needs in the process.
trouble with saying no to people often comes from insecurity. when you feel bullied into things or backed into a corner too often it can lead to agreeing with everything and anything just so people will like you.
1. take small steps
getting out of habits like this are not easy whatsoever and take lots of time. taking small steps to implement getting rid of people pleasing tendencies is the best way to go about this; for example, just blocking someone who bothers you and starting from there.
2. fake it till you make it !
confidence is something absolutely essential but not easy to attain; thats where this skill comes in handy. ive been doing this since i was little and i wont lie and say it melts into real confidence because it doesnt, its just a shield to hide behind until your are genuinely confident and id definitely recommend this 100% to anybody starting or struggling to try and break this habit. act like youre fine & unaffected in front of the people who put you in this position even if you arent. dont show your weaknesses when you know they can be used against you.
3. valuing yourself
value yourself over all else. you are the most important person in your life. validate, support, and value yourself. trust your judgement is right and prioritise the protection of your peace above all else because that is the most important thing.
4. body language
ok as a girl with an incredibly infuriating tendency to turn red over the tiniest thing i feel a little bit of a hypocrite writing this but this is very very very important. if you find yourself in a position where you feel unable to refuse something or anything of the sort you do not show that.
🩰 ─ even if your cheeks turn red act like they arent. ik its sosoosos embarrassing n ur screaming inside but act like its nothing. bcs it is nothing. ok so theres a tiny bit of colour in your cheeks. and? stand your ground.
🧸── back straight, shoulders high, face blank. you dont show anything on your face. show you are completely stubborn and set on your choice/opinion.
🎀 ── if they try to embarrass you or say smth what i do is i literally just blink at them like okay. i dont care. do whatever bro idgaf
5. no hesitation
for the love of god do not second guess yourself. if something makes you upset or uncomfy or anxious or anything like that you leave them you walk away from them you block them you do not second guess yourself and think "but what if" no idc. if it costs you your peace its too expensive.
6. does this help me?
ok obviously when i say to say no i dont mean to like everything. only to the things you do anyway even if you dont want to. if youre not sure what to do when faced with the option to do something you ideally wouldnt really want to the first question you should be asking yourself is "does this help me?" think of it only from your perspective and how it would help you. ask yourself if its really necessary and if its serving you in any way to do this. if its just to fit in with someone else even if you dont really want to then do it then dont do it. why isnt your own presence enough? your peace is the only priority you should have here. what would you tell someone you love in your position? think about it for a sec instead of panicking.
conclusion; people pleasing is useless. you are the centre of ur universe. your peace is the only priority. people are stupid. you can do this. dont let anyone make you feel less than you are. i love u 🫶🩷
#was thinking about this a lot in religious studies today and it formed this post#so i finished this all in one night without a single break just to rant about it to the world#been doing this and focusing on this a lot recently so i wanted to share it with you lovely lovely people!#i love you all#girlblogging#wonyoungism#it girl#pink pilates princess#self care#self concept#self improvement#confidence#princess#dream girl#dream life#that girl#girly stuff#girl blogging#people pleasing#self love
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i wrote another big rant earlier today about character analysis again but tumblr refreshed on my phone and deleted it all. ah well
‘twas all about Max this time and the whole “id vs superego” thing they had going on cuz in my humble “took a semester of psychology and child development” opinion I think that theory isnt the greatest but it makes for such interesting character analysis
So Max is always described as “a being of pure id” while his superego is literally locked in a dark room cut off from the rest of Max’s brain. left so ignored that it manifests itself into a weird little man that Max saw on tv (because it’s this series and of course it did). The fact that Superego apparently HATES Max, seems to barely know anything about him and wants him dead... like WHAT DOES THAT IMPLY? It’s the inside out dilemma all over again but way darker. Max has very infrequent vague allusions to the fact that he’s got some kinda mild depression but I don’t think he genuinely hates himself like that. The most I can see is that he’s got a very weak sense of self preservation. He’s apathetic to his own safety, but again that’s more because of the id thing.
The superego is supposed to be your sense of right and wrong. It’s your morality and logic system that keeps you from doing things Max does, like screaming in public and attacking people and stealing things.
I think in the context of the intentions while writing this game, the superego is essentially a more pretentious word for the Max’s conscience. Like a Jiminy Cricket that’s stuck in Pinocchio’s head and can’t leave. Max ignores his conscience, and his conscience is forced to watch all the stupid stuff Max is doing while ignoring any sense of morality. So he’s like “ok screw this guy all my homies hate stupid id bunny”. I think the superego only manifested once Max found the psychic toys since they’re what caused Max’s brain tumor and other such nonsense. Max couldn’t have had that tumor from the beginning because past Max is fine.
Id is your baseline impulses. Max at his core is constantly acting on impulse and only seeks immediate gratification. Even his love for Sam doesn’t really contradict this. Sam has ALWAYS been his best friend and protector, so keeping Sam safe and happy will keep Max safe and happy. Max isn’t intentionally mean or selfish, and he’s not stupid either. But his mind works in a very direct thought pattern and he doesn’t think through anything he says or does. And Sam kinda does this FOR him if necessary so he’s never really had to develop that part of himself anyway. Plus they’re both self aware toons, so consequences don’t apply!
That being said, everyone we’ve seen with “the gift” that uses the toys seems to be doomed in some way, like the toys themselves are cursed with bad luck. Sammun-Mak, Maximus, the brain in the ship, Skunkape, and Max all met their ends indirectly because of the toys.
Uh i lost track of my point here. just, It’s totally up to interpretation if the superego REALLY is a part of max that resents his own lack of ambition and power, or if he’s just literally detached from Max and is his own disgruntled entity.
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some updates while i’m here. i miss you! whether you’re a casual enjoyer of my blog & i see you in my notes, or my mutuals, or my followers, i’ve been thinking of you :) rare vulnerable moment i do cherish this blog and all your well wishes. thank you very much. i was right, typing is a huge strain and taking a break has been very good for my hands, so i’m going to keep at it.
some things:
don’t be afraid to keep sending me asks! they’re a great joy to me, i love seeing a notif in the inbox. i’ve gotten a fair few already that i’m excited to respond to when i can come back.
i did post a fred weasley drabble and not that i have to explain myself but i wanted to say i’ve been watching the harry potter movies. i’ve never seen them in their entirety, and the earlier ones have always been christmas movies in my house so to speak so i figured id give them a fair shot. i did read the books, and i’ve seen bits and pieces of the movies (hence my interest in fred weasley when i was a tween, but seeing him again made me wanna write for him for the first time in years)
also! a very kind anon told me earlier that my response to someone wrongfully making an ai chat bot of my content was an overreaction. it was “not that deep,” i believe was the colloquial term used. so the inherent content theft of ai invading free creative spaces is solved everyone! well done! very special thanks to the anon that let me know i was overreacting towards something i am passionate about and had a strong feeling towards! wow :) i never would’ve seen it like that. genuinely i am sorry anon that you’re ugly irl and your mommy doesn’t love you, which is why you feel like you can’t have a backbone over certain things. maybe you should stop consuming the free content creators provide on tumblr because you feel so secure in criticizing the selfless service <3 it’s giving: “im an old bigot that thinks ppl must be talentless and stupid when they work at mcdonald’s, but i’m still going to eat the food from there.” you’ve been blocked btw so you’re not offended by my use of free will when making free content on the internet for your grubby little hands to get a hold of and your smooth brain to criticize my right to share my personal opinions.
because the internet is the way it is, getting “hate” online has never really bothered me since i’ve always been a person with a large enough platform for years. it’s very easy for me to ignore and block and never answer whoever has decided to send some worthless hate message. which is probably why i almost never get hate anymore but it does happen occasionally. this was different since it wasn’t an attack on me per se, more so someone trying to admonish me for having a fair reaction towards something offensive. so i’m here to tell you it’s alright to treat strangers on the internet as strangers. you’re allowed to reinforce boundaries. you’re allowed to tell people you do not appreciate their actions towards you, and don’t leave room for argument. i am a very direct person, which means i told that person firmly that they needed to delete that ai chat bot they made of my au without my consent. and i did it without remorse. and i was told “it wasn’t that deep.” well it was. and it is. it is that deep because it’s deep to me, and i know it’s something that happens to others and it is that deep to them too. so what’s the problem in it being that deep? there is none :) let things be deep. be sincere. it is very important.
also if you make ai chat bots without creator’s consent when using their content you’re a piece of shit and doing a disservice to the very person you’re trying to exalt. take a step back and reevaluate how ai harms your interests rather than progresses them as well as the creators you claim your respect and cherish. you’re a victim of propaganda, my friend! and i prolly wouldn’t have made this post if anon hadn’t said anything. so maybe they should’ve kept their mouth shut since they didn’t wanna see shit like this so bad lmfao
now that that’s out of the way, i am sending wet fat sloppy kisses to everyone’s lips tell me when you receive them
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id love to hear more about the period where Cashbaria were friends in your au & how they realised they both had genuine feelings and id LOVE to know how you picture their first kiss
Have you ever listened to Red Wine Supernova by Chappell Roan because-
I'm kidding i'm kidding not entirely go listen to it but anyway I paused writing chapter 8 (?) to answer this ask because I was thinking about it allll day okay anyway.
I think it's important to like realize sometimes these things happen like these feelings sneak up on you without you realizing it or processing what those feelings are which really is the case. So Enobaria is about 16 when she wins, the next year she is 17 when Gloss wins (at 16) and then When Cash wins she's 18 (Cash is 17). And so naturally she knows Gloss first and remembers the things he did and how like..hollow he looked when he returned to the like room where the victors hungout because of the depths he was going to get sponsors for his sister. Enobaria doesn't have a sister (or brother) so like she can't really fathom what he's experiencing right now. By the time they properly meet when Cashmere is on her victory tour they're probably 18 and 19. And like...I don't know if you ever had a codependent friendship at 18/19 but if you have you understand that theres like a depth and fine line you don't really know. Like you are SO close with this friend that you don't really worry about dating people becuase like you have your little bestie why would you need a man. And So I think from the time they're like...20-22 thats what it is. They see each other relatively often in the Captiol (because despite popular opinion I don't think Enobaria just escapes the victor abuse, like theres masochistic men who want to feel those teeth). That being said the kind of clients Enobaria get want to be like..degraded but the ones Cash get want to put a pretty girl in her place and truly just..abuse her. So that being said for years they're just like..they see each other a lot. They don't think about it. Cashmere wonders to Enobaria's room/floor after a bad night when she doesn't want to be alone and feels like someone's after her.
Have you ever like...realized you developed feelings for someone who you just considered your best friend. Thats what my first boyfriend (in HS AND College both) was like. It's just a line you don't realize you crossed until it's too late. Like you aren't aware until it just hits you one day thats what it is. And thats what I can only imagine it was like for them too. Just one day oh! Thats...thats not a platonic feeling.
And when it comes to who kissed who first it was Cashmere. I think it was some time around the 67th? games I think. Like neither of them really had skin in the game at that point. They're alone. Just a little drunk. It involved a conversation about even after like 5 years she sometimes still like cuts her own lips on her teeth and Cashmere's like oh you wouldn't hurt me and even then I'm not scared of you and just like..goes for it and the rest is history!
Anyway stream Red Wine Supernova
#arwbfb tag#cashbaria tag#@bodyelectric77 sent me a DM the other day saying she dissappeared for 24 hours and I became a cashbaria blog#well im like the aunt who got left to watch the kids and went off the deep end#everyone is allowed to stay awake late and eat ice cream around here#ive lost my god damn mind#cashmere tag#enobaria tag#answered asks
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For this ask game:
https://www.tumblr.com/youredyingthatsallthereis/767726851050307584/give-me-a-character
Do… I just go obvious and say roach??😅
If you don’t want to do this for roach then I’m going abstract and saying do this for one of your oldest favorite characters of all time. The one that’s been around the longest.
But again. That’s only if you don’t want to do the ask game for Gary <3 lol
omg lskdflsdkf the desire to do both roach and master chief i slkdfjskldf AHH
lets do roachie boye 🫶🪳🫶
✨how I feel about this character✨
roach is an excellent silent protagonist to me. i really enjoy the game play of 09 MW2 and i know this is definitely me assigning a meaning that is not at all there, but i really do like the choice to make the character that you as the player are controlling while he runs around committing fuckin war crimes be totally silent. i also really like that in game theres no questioning of roach never speaking, like at the end of hornets nest after roach falls while theyre running away no one ever says "well how are we going to know where roach is/if he's coming since he cant talk" they just look for him, soap and nikolai especially are making sure they get him out alive in whatever way they can. and while i know this is absolutely just personal projection, i enjoy getting to play a game with a character who is like me in that way and nobody questions it or says its an issue, they just work with it and do everything they can for their boyfriend teammate.
i could ramble forever about how much/why i love roach so much so for the sake of brevity, he just like me fr and i love him for it 🖤
✨all the people I ship romantically with this character✨
you know, i dont think there is anyone i wouldn't ship with roach. like i of course primarily focus in my own writings on roachghost, soapghostroach, and soaproach, but i will read him with just about anyone. i genuinely dont think theres anybody i cant see roach being with somehow. he's a swtich, he'll make it work
✨my non-romantic OTP for this character✨
i love aromantic ghost & roach
✨my unpopular opinion about this character✨
honestly i think the lovely alllthequeenshorses said it best in this post: i wish people would make roach a little more fucked up! and im including myself in that 'people'! bros just as much of a war criminal as the rest of the 141, you know he has loose screws in there. like for anyone whos played the campaign of 09 MW2 like...in takedown and the hornets nest especially like. the enemies in those levels arent all adults. roach is complicit in the same fucked up actual war criminal shit the rest of the 141 is and would definitely be fucked up as a result.
✨one thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon✨
MW2 and MW3 campaign spoilers if you somehow have managed to avoid them for this long!:
honestly im not sure again that i have anything here. i dont mind that he died, because much like with ghost and soap i think the three of them getting to be together in death is important and i loved the way they all interacted with each other in canon so i dont feel like anything was too amiss i guess (for me!).
maybe if anything, i wish roach could have had both ghost and soap with him when he died. i think the fact that he got to at least be with ghost was good, and i understand why (campaign story wise) soap outlived them for a bit, but i guess if i had to pick one thing id say maybe i wish the three of them could have died together so that they never had to be apart like that, separated by the veil the way they were even if it was brief. sorry thats kinda morbid and ill always write my happy endings where they all retire together but *shrug* i really do just like the MW2 campaign, what can i say 😅
#sorry this took forever for me to get to i really wanted to word everything right!#thank you SO much for asking i sdlfkjsdfkjsdklfj i will NEVER pass up the opportunity to talk about my blorbo <3#gary roach sanderson#thats babey boy right there#hardstyle answers#ask game#foxgloveinspace#maybe one day i will just write a long rambling post about what i loved so much about master chief back in like 2001 when halo ce came out#but ill save that for another day
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I've seen you pop up in the #sparkletag quite a bit recently, and as both a Patron and as a friend of Kneeby, I think I've had enough of your antics.
It's really depressing to see someone dedicate their entire online presence towards hating someone. It's extremely creepy and weird to obsess over every single thing kit does like this. I urge you to go find a better hobby, and I mean it. This kind of parasocial behavior is toxic and only serves to hurt everyone including yourself. Take a break from this and use that time to reflect on yourself and what you really want. Do you want to dedicate all of your time constantly rambling and raving about everything kit does online? Does that sound like a productive use of your time? I don't think it is.
all my posts boil down to "the pacing and prioritization of this comic could use a lot of improvement + i find it weird that the creator isnt raising awareness to a literal genocide going on rn" and you react by writing an angry essay. your ask seems to boil down to "you cant criticize my favorite comic because it might hurt the creators feelings" so im gonna respond with an angrier essay
there are good things about sparklecare, obviously. i resonate with it in some regards. but that doesnt mean its perfect, as nothing is. i dont even tag my shit under the main sparklecare tags (apart from the stuff about kneeby not raising awareness towards palestine) because i know people like you are gonna get upset if you see a conflicting opinion on your dash. the only tags i tend to use are #sparklecriticism and #sparklecare criticism, none of the main tags. block those tags if you dont wanna deal with me.
my criticism is valid (i think) since yeah. the comics writing has a huge problem when it comes to letting things happen naturally instead of rushing them, which results in kneeby having to explain things on the blog (which 99% of the time you have to scroll deep into since the main blog is constantly reblogging the cometcare one) rather than having the comic clarify it on its own. thats a genuine issue in storytelling so i feel like it should be addressed and worked on.
i have way more of a presence online than this blog, obviously. i just dont want this blog connected to my real identity for a wide variety of reasons (mainly not wanting to be harassed even further than i already am)
if youre a friend of kneeby then i think you should tell kit to actually DO SOMETHING to raise awareness to the genocide going on in palestine and other targets, PUBLICLY. not just an announcement in a private discord, a public statement, or AT LEAST reblog the fanart of uni waving the palestinian flag. all the social commentary ive seen (yes im still taking the social commentary into account since the comic was described as such until my blog popped up) has come across as performative to anyone besides the clowns themselves, id love to see kneeby talk about issues that dont just apply to kit.
i know damn well the sparklecare blog is kits biggest platform, kit should use it to raise awareness, i dont care if the topic makes kit sad, it makes me sad too, but i still retweet as much shit about it as possible whenever it crosses my mind because i actually care about issues that dont involve just me and i actually want to do something to change the world. im a teenager and i do more to raise awareness than a group of adults.
im just a kid with opinions
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extra luke thoughts i couldnt be bothered to edit
my tone in more edited writing often ends up sounding a bit. melodramatic and over-think-y, but i dont really perceive luke as a sad character! he's someone incredibly resolute, and even if his surface level opinions seem harsh, they're brittle and easy to break through. i think luke worries too much about being fragile, when that fragility can just as easy become /flexibility/. i believe this flexibility built on his foundation of genuinely strong morals will make him - already makes him - incredibly strong as a person.
i do think there's some inevitable heartbreak that will happen - luke idolises too much for that to not be the case - but i don't think there is much that is unsurvivable for him. part of why i'm so irritated by a lot of the excessive infantalisation and chihuahua jokes about him is that like...he is the character who has received the most development in obey me. like he has changed a LOT throughout the story, and while i won't spoil anything there is a clear arc, and even WITHOUT that luke is already incredibly up there so far as strength in character (as a person, not as a literal character). the jokes just feel...so misplaced, i guess? like he's not some over eager annoying brat that wants everyone out of the way so he can take over, he's genuinely eager to learn, and his hostility to demons is completely understandable and the reasons he has for fearing them (being evil) is literally something a lot of the demon cast take pride in for a good chunk of the plot.
admittedly i think a lot of my frustration also comes from chihuahuas being notoriously mistreated and boiled down to accessories (hence why theyre often aggressive and yappy. theyre small, their needs arent being met and they cant defend themselves any other way) because i sure do lack the parental/older sibling urges needed to feel like...protective or genuinely attached to luke in any sorta way. he's like bottom 3 on my list of charas to care about and thats not out of dislike, just out of apathy. but i also cant stand for slander and hypothetical injustice (/lh) so im gonna complain!!!
ANYWAYS if nothing else i think. lukes belief is important. like he really trusts that people like micheal and simeon are good, and will be good and keep that strength. by that same virtue he can have a similar confidence in himself, not arrogance, mind, just. yeah. hes good. he knows that!! he needs to learn to be better since the racism isnt ideal but yknow-
speaking of learning hes REAL determined like!! hes genuinely happy to keep working and trying. he doesnt want to be coddled because he genuinely wants to know and be better. like. he DOES think like a child. he wants to grow up so fast, but he has so much time, so much more than most, but if he has all the time in the world then why not NOW? (course, waiting is easy for patience, simeon, someone who hasnt let time move for himself in centuries)
i think theres a sorta. inevitable conflict with simeon and luke coming whether solmare mentions it or not but like. dynamic wise. because simeon refuses to see change in others unless they dont let it be ignored, he needs everyone to be within his perception of them and the role hes assigned them in his mind. but luke is someone who WILL change, and is changing, and simeon can only infantalise him for so long before it genuinely becomes a problem, especially when it’s balanced/offset by the way that him and luke very much begin playing the roles of a struggling parent and over eager child. while luke is strong, and good, and genuinely skilled, he also needs time to be none of those things. everyone does, but it’s especially important for child development, even if said child is over a thousand years old.
its something that id argue does give us way more insight to the celestial realm than a lot of other vague exposition we’ve gotten. while luke is considered especially talented, there never seems to be any indication that he is odd for an angel, adult or child. that combined with how vacant the celestial realm feels, how emotionally detached it is, gives some interesting extra details to the basis of the celestial realm not being holy and happy in the way it’s implied/perceived to be. which isnt a new revelation by any stretch, but...context, yknow? extra supporting evidence. idk! these are my rambles that i am putting out many of which are years old and some that i thought about literally yesterday!!!
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the last time i was sunburnt was in high school,
and it lasted for years. perhaps i wasn’t nifty in applying sunscreen or i’ve been touching grass too much, but it was arguably the former.
title: sunburn - chloe michelle howarth
rating: 4/5
warning: spoilers ahead! proceed with caution.
while i’m writing this, i’m watching season 2 episode 8 of Bridgerton if you care to know.
on a side note, this book is the book of the month (july) for the sapphic book club discord that i’m in.
i’ve seen people referring to Sunburn as a “sapphic Call Me By Your Name” which i would wholeheartedly agree with, if not because of the ending. id have to concede that the summer fling played a large role in the development of the romance in Sunburn, as was in CMBYN.
the novel revolves around Lucy who feels as though she was an outsider in her own community. it is a queer, coming-of-age novel that those struggling with their sexuality and the pain of first loves would relate with. an ongoing theme throughout the novel was that she didn’t understand why she was so different from the people around her. she struggled with not being able to have romantic feelings for her guy best friend, Martin. there were so much expectations from the people around her that they would end up together and get married. even she believed it herself, but she couldn’t love him. not romantically, but only platonically. she finds herself struggling to fit in with her girl friends who, as they grow up are becoming more and more different.
following a typical ‘closeted teenager has a secret relationship’ storyline, Lucy’s mom caught her getting all handsy with her secret lover in her bedroom, causing both relationships to spiral. the novel touches on religious trauma, and mother-daughter relationships. i think that it hits home when she decided to pretend to be in love with Martin just to appease her mother, though it’s a bit overkill. honestly, if my mother ignored me the way that hers did it would’ve killed me inside too.
“Isn’t she clever? Doesn’t she know me well? Of course I like her. I like her so much sometimes that I wish the other girls wouldn’t talk to her or touch her, and that it was only me and her. Is that too much?”
when i read this, i felt like i was transferred back to high school again, experiencing what would be my first infatuation towards a girl. the novel managed to capture falling in love for the first time towards someone of the same gender. the obsession and jealousy, the uncertainty and the denial. we were able to witness Lucy’s obsession towards Susannah becoming more intense through her monologues and conflicting feelings.
“It’s hard not be demolished by the thought of her, because I live in a body that has loved her and I see with eyes that have witnessed her. She is part of my muscles, my tissue, she is unforgettable.”
the way Howarth writes Lucy’s monologues about Susannah feeds the hopeless romantic inside of me. the letters, her thoughts… she worships the very ground that Susannah walks on. she has so much love for Susannah, but she’s torn between getting what she wants and what other expects of her.
i stand by my opinion that martin stays the best boy till the end of the story. he was a bit of a jerk in the beginning yes, but his reaction in the end says EVERYTHING. i feel bad for him but i love that he prioritized his friendship over his own feelings. i really hope that he finds a love big and genuine enough for his.
i’m sure that i missed a lot of details and how i feel about this novel but i hope that this provides some kind of insight for those interested to pick the novel up. these, however are my own thoughts and you are more than welcome to have your own thoughts about this novel!
have a good one, love <3
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