#i'm so tired and stressed and just unhappy

[galaxywhump]

.

[pandora15]

idk man i guess it's just that i'm struggling to find fic to read and barely having the time/energy to write at all

[chomesuke]

watching your life and all your relationships fall apart as you are barely able to leave your house is a very devastating part of being chronically ill.

[catullansparrowlet]

Reading articles like: "Yes, I understand what you're saying, however, I absorb the information about as well as if you'd thrown undercooked spaghetti at a wall.

This research paper is a flop and I will never get a degree.

[dailymanners]

Most people who don't live under a rock can tell you that customer/employee relations have gotten more strained over the past four years.

I worked food service and retail pre-covid, so I know as well as anyone that there have always been difficult customers. But as per my pinned post a lot of evidence suggests there has been increased hostility, especially towards customer service workers, but if you work in a public facing customer service job you probably don't need any studies to tell you that, but having the evidence backed up by studies does help.

There's been some discussion on the why, with anything from "people lost their socialization and ability to behave themselves in public" to "covid affected people's brains and made them more aggressive" to "people were threatened by having rules enforced against them by people they felt should be below them, aka food service and retail workers" and it's likely some combination of the above.

But one thing I think is severely underdiscussed is that, at least in the Western countries I've lived in and/or have friends/family/loved ones living in, is it just me or have companies gotten lazy about giving their employees proper training??

I mean, years back, way before covid, even for minimum wage food service job, I'd get some sort of orientation and proper introduction and training to really make me feel prepared to answer customer's questions about the food and the company. There were people actually designated to train the newbies and answer their questions. So obviously I felt more competent and ready, and obviously I was better able to help the customers and do my job properly.

Now, "after" covid (which I know is still ongoing so for all intents and purposes let's define after covid as just meaning after the start of the pandemic and the shifts to society it's been causing) when I start a new job, whether it's retail or even an office job? I'm just thrown to the wolves. No proper orientation or training, nobody specifically designated to train me, just "yeah, you'll figure it out as you go, you can ask your co-workers if you have questions (ahaha but none of them are specifically designated to or being paid extra to train you so they'll get annoyed and snippy when you need help from them) good luck!"

And I ask around and a lot of people who have started new jobs after the start of the pandemic feel the same way. No proper training or guidance. Just lots and lots of mistakes resulting in lots and lots of pissed off customers.

I don't think this is a stretch to say this has contributed to worse relations overall between customers and employees. Customers are fed up that everywhere they go none of the staff know how to do their job (not saying this justifies being a jerk to customer service workers, ofc it doesn't!) and this results in employees everywhere being tense, stressed, and on edge. They don't know what they're doing, they can't get the proper help or guidance they need, and they're tired of being constantly snapped at by customers when they make a mistake and don't know what to do.

Nobody's happy. Something about the pandemic made companies more lazy about actually properly training their employees, and now everybody is stressed and unhappy about it, but the companies continue to get away with it.

[softspiderling]

illicit affairs - part six | r.c

summary:

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to talk to you.”

The tone in Rafe’s voice made you pause and you felt your stomach drop. This was it. Rafe found out about your feelings for him and he was about to tell you how he didn’t feel the same.

“Rafe-”

“Can you let me say what I want to say first?”

OR; Your parents are gone for the weekend and you have the house to yourself. Mostly.

pairing: rafe cameron x reader

warnings: none, I think

word count: 3k

author's note: wait.... this is kinda crazy, but don't hate me for this please. Also i'm genuinely so tired rn, falling asleep as i type this... happy reading!!! <3

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pt. six: "you'll be flushed when you return"

You were sitting at the bottom of the stairs at your house, watching your parents pack the last of their things into their bags. They were headed to Charleston over the weekend, running the last errands before the Spring Fling the following week.

“Do you have your wallet and phone?” your mother asked your father as she closed the flap of her purse, checking her reflection in the mirror.

“Yes dear.”

Your father tossed his laptop into his bag, zipping it up before straightening his back, glancing over to you.

“Are you sure you don’t want Kelly to come over the weekend? It’s still not too late to call her in.”

“I’m good, dad,” you assured him. “Kelly should take the weekend off, it’s such a waste to have her for the whole weekend just incase I want a home cooked meal. I’ll probably just go out to eat.”

“Okay then,” your father said with a nod. “We’ll probably be back Sunday night, behave yourself.”

“Bye honey!” your mother called over her shoulder, exiting the house. Your father was hot on her heels, but just before he closed the door, he paused, turning back to you.

“And don’t you dare throw a party while we’re gone,” your father said, wagging a finger for good measure because apparently you were a child in the 80s being scolded by your parents. You resisted an eye roll, because they still had enough time to make you to come along on the trip, so you only nodded, like a good daughter.

“I won’t dad, don’t worry,” you sighed, leaning your chin on your hand. “I’m just going to hang out with my friends.”

Your father gave a curt nod, bidding you goodbye before he left, shutting the front door behind him. Shortly after you could hear the engine from their car start, before the sound of the engine slowly quietened down as it left the estate.

“Finally,” you sighed to yourself, padding back upstairs feeling like your stress had just left with your parents. It was a sunny day out and you wanted to use that time to get some tanning done. As you fished a bikini out of your drawer, you had half a mind to text your friends to come over, hang out by the pool. But that meant facing Rafe.

Ever since the nightly swim during the boneyard party, the ache in your chest that you felt whenever Rafe was around had started to feel more present, as opposed to dull. But you had promised yourself (and Rafe) that this wouldn’t get between your friendship. Tugging the bikini top over your chest, you stared at your reflection in the mirror, unhappy with yourself.

“Fuck it,” you muttered to yourself. Grabbing your sunglasses, some sunblock and your phone, you headed back downstairs, sending a text into your groupchat.

precious [04/05/24: 2:37 pm]: i’m out by the pool if anyone’s down to join

precious [04/05/24: 2:37 pm]: bring food tho

Sliding the door closed behind you as you stepped out to the patio, you headed for your designated sun chair, dropping your stuff on the small side table. You planted your ass on the chair, slathered the sun block on your body, because you very much did not want to look like the hamburgers Topper tried to grill and as you spread the sun block on your arms, your phone buzzed.

top [04/05/24: 2:40 pm]: stuck at the court house with my mom rn, i’ll text when i’m otw

kelce [04/05/24: 2:41 pm]: i’ll be over later

No reply from Rafe, though.

With an eyeroll, you turned your phone, screen side down and made yourself comfortable on the chair, feeling your skin warm up from the sunrays. You heard your phone buzz again, but you were too lazy to reach for it, shutting your eyes, a comfortable silence settling over your patio. Before you knew it, you dozed off, limbs growing tired in the sun.

“Hey precious…. You really invite people over to hang out just to be asleep when I get here?”

….

“Precious.”

You let out a small noise, squeezing your eye shut, a frown on your forehead. The voice quietened, and you nearly slipped back into your slumber, when you felt fingertips dancing on your exposed stomach. The touch was featherlight, but it broke through your unconsciousness, your eyes fluttering open.

Rafe was perched on the edge of the sun chair, his palm resting on your hip. His mouth was curled in a smirk and you were already annoyed with him.

“I was having such a good nap,” you huffed, rolling your shoulders a little, before you arched your back, waking yourself up a little.

“You’re not being a very good host,” Rafe replied, all the while his eyes not leaving your chest, which admittedly, was your goal.

“You haven’t been a guest at my house since you were 14.”

Leaning on your elbows, you sat up to look at him, unimpressed.

“Where are the others?”

“Told them not to come,” Rafe said, his thumb tracing circles into your skin, but you only narrowed your eyes at him.

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to talk to you.”

The tone in Rafe’s voice made you pause and you felt your stomach drop. This was it. Rafe found out about your feelings for him and he was about to tell you how he didn’t feel the same.

“Rafe-”

“Can you let me say what I want to say first?”

You exhaled deeply, sighing, and buried yourself deeper in the sun chair. Rafe watched you intently for a second, removing his hand off your waist to run it through his hair.

“When I suggested we do this casual sex thing, I was mostly doing it out of comfort. I hated hooking up with those random girls who were always so insanely clingy after, and you were right there: my best friend, who’s also kinda crazy hot and understands me without having to say a single word.”

Rolling your eyes at him, you turned away to hide the flush on your cheeks, but Rafe stopped you, turning your chin to face him again.

“Will you look at me while I’m talking to you?”

You lifted your eyes to meet his, and nearly died at his undivided attention on you. After making sure, that you weren’t going to turn away again, Rafe dropped his hand, carefully reaching for yours.

“The past few days I have been struggling, feeling restless, and I couldn’t tell why, until I realized….” Rafe paused, taking a deep breath. “I love you, precious.”

Your eyes widened at the confession, your mouth agape. “I…. What?”

“I know this sounds insane and I really really hope you feel the same way, because otherwise this is gonna get real awkward,” Rafe chuckled dryly, and you shook your head quickly.

“Rafe,” you started. “You know I’m in love with you, right?”

“You are?”

“Yes!”

Rafe beamed at you, pulling you in closely, and the weight on your shoulders disappeared when your lips touched his. Even though you have kissed so many times, this kiss felt… Different. He pulled away, hand gently caressing your cheek and you sighed softly, thinking of how to break this to Kelce and Topper.

“What are you thinking about?” Rafe asked, raising a brow at you. “Precious?”

Your eyes narrowed at the sudden increase of volume,, his voice his voice seeming so much louder than before. You opened your mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

“Precious, hello?”

With a gasp, you startled awake, your heart racing when you saw Rafe standing over your sun chair, his brows furrowed over his sun glasses.

“What?” you breathed out, swallowing thickly, trying to calm yourself down.

“Shit, are you okay?”

Rafe pushed his sun glasses up, his forehead creased in concern and you nodded, taking a deep breath.

It was just a dream.

“Yeah, sorry, you just startled me,” you assured him, grasping at your chest. You could barely look at Rafe, the dream was still replaying in your head, it seemed so real. Rubbing your face with your hand, you swung your legs off the sun chair, peering up at Rafe, hand coming up to shield your eyes from the sun.

“When did you get here?”

“Not that long ago,” Rafe replied, eyeing you suspiciously. “You sure you alright?”

You rolled your eyes at him, shoving his bicep. “Yes, dad.”

Rafe smirked, and you knew exactly what he was going to say next.

“I think you meant-”

“I know what I meant, you perv.”

Your hand reached out to whack him, but his reflexes were faster, his fingers slipping around your wrist to stop you. With a quick tug, he pulled you towards him, sending you crashing against his chest. You glared up at him, but your cheeks were flushed. If he asked, you’d blame it on the sun.

“Why aren’t we hanging out at your pool more often?”

Rafe played with the small strings of your bikini bottoms on your waist, a smirk ever present on his lips.

“Because you always get bored hanging around doing nothing,” you reminded him. He clicked his tongue, his eyes zeroing in on the valley between your breasts.

“I wouldn’t be bored if you wore this bikini every time, fuck.”

You rolled your eyes at him. “God, have you always been this horny or is it just since we started fucking?”

Before Rafe could answer, a crash sounded from inside the house followed by some cursing. Your head turned towards the sound before you looked back to him.

“Top and Kelce are here already?”

“Yeah, we came together,” Rafe said, as if it was obvious, but you only let out a sigh, pushing away from him to head into the house. As you got into the kitchen, you saw Topper and Kelce tinkering around in the kitchen.

“Hey boys.”

“Precious, hey,” Kelce greeted you, shoving a bag of ice on the counter to give you a half hug.

“What are we making?”

“I was thinking frozen daiquiris,” Topper said, heaving the mixer on the counter with a grin, before smacking a kiss on your cheek. “Hey. We were starting to think Rafe got lost out there.”

“Oh no. He was too distracted by my boobs.”

Topper paused to glance over to you, his eyes quickly flying over your chest, before giving a brief nod.

“Understandable.”

“Yeah, I don’t even like boobs and yours look good in that bikini,” Kelce chimed in. Rafe only gave you a look that said I told you so as he rounded the kitchen island.

“And you’re calling me a perv,” Rafe miffed, emptying the bag of mangoes. Together, the four of you managed to make a big batch of frozen mango daiquiris, tossed together the salad the boys got from Whole Foods and prepped the steak for grilling in-between bickering.

Sipping on your drink, you carried out the salads out to the patio, while Topper got the grill going, with Rafe breathing down his neck, because he paid good money for the steaks and he wasn’t about to let Topper grill it to death. Kelce was setting the table when you put the salad bowl down, a beer bottle in his hand as he laid out the cutlery. You eyed him carefully, thinking back to his text.

“Hey, what were you doing before you came over?”

Kelce’s hand stilled over the fork, and he decidedly didn’t lift his head, staring at the napkins. “I was at the golf course.”

He was being cagey, and his answer didn’t really satisfy you, especially because you knew how he Kelce hated golf. Whenever Top and Rafe went golfing, you and Kelce either went for ice cream or to the beach or hung out in a golf caddy, making fun of Top and Rafe. Kelce would never willingly go on on the green.

“…. What were you doing at the golf course?”

Kelce hesitated before he answered, taking a deliberately took another long sip of his beer, and you narrowed your eyes at him before he finally gave in.

“Malcolm asked me if I wanted to play a few rounds of golf with him.”

Your mouth dropped open, half in shock, half in excitement. “Wait, really?”

Kelce nodded, his mouth curling up in a small grin.

“Yeah, Just the two of us.”

“Kels, that’s great,” you told him, pausing as you thought his words over. “Wait. Was this just you hanging out, or was it a date?”

“… He didn’t say date.”

You sighed and Kelce shook his head, frowning.

“Don’t look at me like that. You know this shit isn’t easy, for neither of us.”

“I know Kels,” you said, voice soft. “But I just don’t want you to get hurt again if Malcolm is scared of things getting real and throws himself at another girl.”

Kelce shrugged with his shoulders, like he didn’t really care, but you rounded the table to lean your head on his shoulder. He didn’t say anything for a few minutes and you were content to just stand there with him, watching as Rafe and Topper fought over the grill.

“What about you?” Kelce suddenly asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I haven’t heard anything about boys from you recently.”

Your eyes lingered on Rafe as he snatched the tongs out of Topper’s hand, and you bit back a smile. “Oh. No one’s caught my eye recently,” you lied and Kelce, sighed.

“You’re lucky, crushing on someone is so stressful. It is not what it used to be.”

If only he knew.

“Alright, steaks will be done in a few minutes!” Rafe called over from the grill and you nudged Kelce.

“Come on, let’s get the rest of the table settled.”

The four of you spent a rather chill day out at your pool. After a great steak dinner, with the steaks grilled to perfection (”I told you that it was the perfect time to take them off the grill Top, sometimes you just gotta listen to your gut.”) you got buzzed off of the frozen daiquiris and even went into the pool a few times. Before you knew it, the night broke in and it got too chilly, so you started clearing everything away, carrying the dirty dishes into the kitchen.

“Man, staying out in the sun all day really knocked me the fuck out,” Kelce said, yawning into his shoulder as he put the rest of the salad into the fridge.

“Yeah, we’re getting old,” Rafe agreed with him, and Topper side eyed him,

“Who’s we? You’re two years older than us.”

Rafe smacked Topper’s head upside down and you snickered to yourself as you dried off the mixer. Rafe moved to open the dishwasher, but you waved him off.

“Leave it, I can do it in the morning.”

Rafe raised an eyebrow at you. “You sure, precious?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“A’ight.”

Rafe yawned into his fist and the boys started to collect their things. You were taken aback, having expected Rafe to find an excuse to stay back, maybe even stay the night. You did have the whole house to yourself, and it seemed like he didn’t even care.

Tossing the dish towel on the counter, you walked the boys to the door, leaning against the door frame as you hugged them good bye.

“Alright, guys. See you tomorrow. Thanks for dinner.”

The boys waved, one by one getting into the car, and you crossed your arms as you stared at Rafe through the tinted window of Topper’s car as you stood on your front porch. As Topper’s car pulled off your grounds, you headed back inside with a sigh, shutting the door behind you.

You were tempted to go to sleep right away, but the amount of dishes in the kitchen was taunting you. In all honesty, you’d have appreciated a little help from the boys, you only turned down their offers because you thought that was what Rafe wanted you to say. On one hand, you really didn’t feel like cleaning up, on the other hand, you didn’t want Kelly to feel obligated to clean your shit up when she came back on Monday. So cleaning up it was. You put the dried off mixer away, and started rinsing the plates and cutlery. You cleared the last of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher, yawning into your elbow. Kelce was right, the sun shining down on you really had made you super tired. You yearned for your bed and for some rest, and sleep was near as you put in the last plate into the dishwasher. Just as you were about to shut the dishwasher and start the program, the hairs on the nape of your neck rose when you heard the sliding door to the patio open in the otherwise quiet house.

Fuck.

Didn’t you lock the door?

Your heart was in your throat, and you grabbed the nearest weapon you could find - a rolling pin - as you snuck into the hallway. There was no way that someone broke into your house, right? It was just your imagination?

You half expected to see nothing as you rounded the corner, the noise just being a figment of your tired self, but you froze when you heard steps come towards you so when you stepped out from behind the wall, you swung the rolling pin as quick as possible, hoping to knock the intruder out before he could do any harm.

“What the fuck are you doing?!”

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author's note: wait omg my first actual cliffhanger in this series

[luveline]

hi jade!! can i request something with the marauders (platonic or romantic) maybe reader has been real stressed with work or school and the marauders try to get her to relax once they realize how stressed she actually is?? ty! u don’t have to do this, it’s just a thought :))

thank you for your request my love, nearly romantic poly!marauders x fem!reader

James notices first, surprisingly. While Sirius is fluent in what goes unsaid, and Remus is more than familiar with stress, it's James who has learned to read his sometimes sulky friends, and so it's James who knows that your tight shoulders and your half-hearted smile are from more than being tired. 

He doesn't want to announce your potential upset upset the world, so he waits for Remus to get a drink while Sirius is in the loo and slides down the sofa toward you until you're sitting thigh to thigh. He doesn't ever want much space from you. He's fortunate that you feel the same. 

"What, James?" you ask, leaning on his shoulder. "Are you okay?" 

"Are you okay?" he asks quietly, solemn, so you know he's serious. 

"Why wouldn't I be okay?" 

"You just seem unhappy tonight, is all. You know you can tell me. Or if you don't want to tell me, you can tell one of the boys." 

Because you and your friends are in an incredibly weird (not weird, really, unexpected, but so full of love and sweetness that weird doesn't apply) situation in which you aren't dating anyone but it feels like you are. James imagines it as a sort of precipice, where you might choose one of them, or, in what seems the more unique but better fit, you might not choose at all. 

James only knows you feel the same way about them as they do about you because you'd confessed to Remus how guilty you feel for stringing them along. He reported back, and is quoted by himself to have said, Well, we must be stringing you along too. While I string James along, and Sirius strings me. 

So everybody fancies everybody and nobody knows what to do about it. (Well, apart from that one kiss between James and Remus, which went exceptionally well. James had known what to do about that). For tonight, nothing has to be done. All James needs to do is figure out how to make you feel better. 

Remus is offended at having had his seat stolen when he returns, but then he sees your sad face slack on James' big shoulder and forgets to be annoyed. Crouching down in front of you, Remus tilts his head to the side to align his face to yours, a frown mirrored on his lips as he asks, "What's wrong, dove?" 

The way he says it makes James pleased, and it also makes him like Remus impossibly more. James is earnest and ardent in wanting to comfort you, but Remus is very, very good at it. He has this seriousness, no-nonsense tone wrapped in a soft affection that could draw out James' very worst secrets. It's no surprise when you crack clean in two and confess.

"I'm really stressed out." Your voice takes a horrible dive, like you might cry. "Um, work is just hard, and I'm worried about money, too." 

James doesn't suppose you're in the depth of a relationship where it's appropriate to offer to bankroll you, and it's not what you want anyhow. He bites back any affluent admission in favour of a subtler approach. 

"You're worried about money?" he asks, gently as he can. "You aren't going without, are you? I really hope you'd tell us if it were bad." 

You shake your head. "I'm not going without. Don't worry, it's not that bad." But it could be, goes unsaid. 

Remus hums, his hand on your knee. "You know we care about you. Please, don't not tell us if you need something, okay?" His hand climbs the stretch of your thigh. "What's worrying you, dove? With work, are they giving you a hard time again?" 

Sirius returns somewhere in the midst of your talking, and he's absolutely horrified when a single tear bounds down your cheek. He squeezes between you and the armrest of the sofa to wipe your face as it comes, his weight almost entirely on top of you, so close that his hair tickles your cheek and neck. "Don't cry. I promise not to leave you alone with these two ever again," he jokes, though the tenderness with which he holds your face is nothing but sincere. 

James, sick of being the only one not comforting you physically, finds one of your hands to hold. It's smaller, and warm, and he pulls it to his chest as though that might hide you away from all the things that are freaking you out. 

To no one's shock, the boys are good listeners. Not always to each other, but what one lacks another can make up, and they manage to pull out from you your pack of troubles one by one. When that's done, they assuage each accompanying fear. 

If the very worst happens, you'll always have them to lean on. 

That makes you cry more than the stress. Grateful —though the last thing they're comforting you for is gratitude— you needle your arms around Sirius' waist and hide your face in his chest. He frowns down at you as he wraps you up tightly. James doesn't even feel jealous. Well, mostly, until Sirius kisses your forehead and James can actually see your happy shudder. Lucky for him, you aren't done. You squeeze Sirius before pulling away and turning to James. He realises then what made Sirius so bold, your whispered thank you like a vibration through his chest. He pats your back. 

"That's alright," he murmurs. 

You nod and squeeze and move on to Remus, who's been sitting at your feet for the last twenty minutes while you cry, concerned but not complaining. He's eager even if he won't say that, climbing to his feet so he can reach down for you and receive his own hug. James is a ridiculous romantic, and he just aches with affection for both of you as he watches Remus nose your cheek. When Remus finally pulls away, Sirius is looking at them with the same expression. 

"Do you feel better?" he asks you. 

You sniffle and wipe your nose with your sleeve sheepishly. "Yes. Thank you, boys. I really don't know what I'd do without you." 

James forgets restraint and swings his arm around your shoulder. "It's a good thing you'll never be without us, then," he says, and kisses your cheek.

[jamespotterismydaddy]

Lord Husband (Chapter 13)

A/N: i'm sorry yall, i feel like my posting is getting slower and slower. I know this a short one too but i've been so stressed with uni

WORD COUNT: 862 words

Series masterlist

Both Safia and Rose are waiting for you when you get back from your supper.

“Gods, i’m nearly ready for bed. I’m so tired.” You groan as you walk into the room but both of the girls can see clearly that you walk as if you’re much lighter than you have been for the past few weeks.

“Yes, princess. Your ride was very long today. You entirely skipped lunch.” Safia muses, fetching yours and her own needlework. She hands you yours before sitting on a settee across from the armchair you rest on.

“I suppose I did.” You murmur as you make yourself comfortable, not yet looking at the needlework.

“Your meal with Lord Stark seemed to perk you up.” Rose comments and Safia shoots her a pointed look for her impertinence. She always was the more bold one of the two. 

“I look happier because he said we should have my brothers over for a visit, not because I shared a meal with him.” You say sharply.

“That is wonderful news, princess!” Safia states politely but her joy is clearly genuine as well. She’s loved nothing more than playing with little Aegon and Viserys since her brother died.

“Yes, very wonderful.” Rose adds. It isn’t that she is unhappy with the news, she just senses that it isn’t the only reason you’ve come back to your chambers with such a smile on your face.

Rose is higher born than Safia and you can tell in these moments. She is much less frightened to speak her mind than the lowborn girl is even if she is only the daughter of a second born son whose house is nothing close to prominent. You’ve always liked that about her; Rose doesn’t let her station define her and that’s one of the reasons she’s your closest friend.

“You have other thoughts on your mind, Rose. Speak them.”

“I wouldn’t want to overstep, princess.” She replies. The girl may be bold but she isn’t stupid. She knows how easy it is to hit a nerve when speaking of your relationship, or lack thereof, with Cregan.

“You’ve never had that problem before.” You point out and Safia smiles at the comment, looking back down at her needlepoint right away.

“I just sensed that you were getting along better with your husband. It pleases me to see you smile once in a while. It used to grace your face so often back in Dragonstone, and even in Kingslanding. Now, it seems as though you haven’t smiled for weeks.” it's a sad notion but you aren’t regretful of your coldness.

“I am the last woman in this world to sit down and take the hand they’ve been given by an unfair dealer.” You muse. The anger all feels justified, thinking of yourself as an avenging angel. “If I am compliant in my own misery then every other woman will follow suit... They’ll have no choice. I’m the second most powerful woman in the world and I had no choice.” You say solemnly.

“Change is coming, princess.” Safia starts. “It is just… slow.”

“Look at your mother. Westeros had not seen a queen rule in her own right before her.” Rose says.

“At this rate, our children won’t even see a fair world.” You reply.

“But the later generations will benefit.” Safia says optimistically. “Prince Jacaerys will see that it is continued.”

“Yes… Jacaerys.” You murmur bitterly. “Is it so wrong that I want to benefit from it? More could be done.”

The girls ignore the slight against your mother and Rose speaks again, “It could take… unfathomable amounts of violence to accomplish such a thing.”

“Who cares for the lives of men who are unfaithful to their ruler?”

“And those men’s children, wives, families, are innocent but if you kill the head of their house, they would never forget it. They might not directly call for vengeance but most would resent a radical ruler. People of status rarely care for radicality. It diminishes their power.”

“Death would extinguish it.” You murmur. The girls know you aren’t truly serious but such laxness in reference to violence discomforts them. “Jacaerys will continue our mother’s progressions but that doesn’t make him any less of a man. He can’t truly understand.”

“I am sure Lady Baela will be of aid to him in that.” Safia adds thoughtfully.

But it could’ve been you aiding him. Though, the people would never chant your name the way they chant his.

“She will make a good queen one day.”

“Perhaps one day your brother will take you on as an advisor.” Rose suggests. She sees how badly you want control.

“If I’m not too busy tending to Stark’s children.” You scoff.

“They will be your children too, princess. I am sure you will love them as any mother loves their child.” Safia says kindly.

You ponder on her words for a moment, wondering if a mothers love if truly unconditional. Is there something inherent in childbirth that will make you fall in love with the babe that tears itself from your womb?

You’re not sure if you’ll ever love the children Cregan puts in your belly.

“Perhaps.” 

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[bigraggatheopstoppa]

LITTLE MONSTER

warnings: cussing mentions of blood, sukuna being a shit head and Yuji being sho shweeet and Nanami being a tired old man. No curses AU just a Au I made up (I'm gonna do this a lot) MINORS DNI

ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍✧⁠*。 ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍✧⁠*。ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍✧⁠*。

It was a dewy night. Nanami tiredly drove through the misty night, nearly falling asleep on the wheel. He was only driving so late because he was taking the Itadori twins home after a shit match, but he was still pretty tired from the aching day.

Dealing with snooty coworkers who think they don't have shit stains in their drawls, or women who are literally trying to get in his pants every five seconds really takes a lot out of the blonde. He groans impatiently as he wipes a hand over his face and stares down the barren highway — well almost barren

Nanamin swerves out of the way of a blood soaked girl and quickly tries to catch his losing breath. Sukuna and Yuji jolt awake from the harsh maneuvering

“The fuck wrongs with you?”

Sukuna's harsh tone wakes Nanamin from his dazed state. Seeing a fairly young girl covered in blood and grime really gave him a shock — what the hell could a she- a person even be doing to be in that state?

“I-I saw something- someone”

Nanamin let's out a tired exhale as he looks over out the car door window to see if the girl he thought he saw but.. she is still there. Just standing there dazed and unmoving

Nanami pointed at the window ”Her. I saw her”

“nanamin what-” Yuji stopped in the middle of his sentence. At first he was initially scared because again, what the hell could she have done to end up like that, but then he saw the dazed almost lifeless look in her eyes and thought she must be in some kind of harm or parallel, I mean she looks frail so she could've been defending herself, right?

Yuji rapidly shakes Sukuna's side to wake him up fully ”Come on guys we have to help her, she's—shes probably scared or lost” Sukuna rolls his like a brooding teenager even though he's well into his 30s “that could be a serial killer for all we know. Get rid of your Savior complex brat"

Yuji huffs and tugs on Nanamin ”can you check on her at least? Please?" The blonde gives a sigh in tiredness and defeat ”i can try, and maybe call the police or something to take care of it.”

Nanami steps out of the car and his face immediately twists at the stench of iron and metal, Nanami reaches out to the girls shoulder to see any kind of response

He lightly shakes her shoulder — but she just stands there. Dazed and unaware of her own existence. Nanami swallows the thick lump building in his throat as he continues to get some response from her.

”Ma'am are you alright? Do you know where you are?”

Nanami's gentle shakes slow down as the mystery lady begins to stumble a bit before nearly collapsing on the floor.

He grunts in disgust from getting the blood on his work suit — so fucking unsanitary. He shuffles her into the passenger seat before trying to figure out what to really do next.

The day was already stressful enough — dealing with trust fund babies and women wanting to cheat with their unhappy marriages, two twins who don't know how to fucking get along, and all to go home to a sloppy unmanaged house that he's just gonna clean up when he gets home anyways. Then to find a random girl covered in blood?? He was ready to pop a vessel.

Maybe I could just throw her to the police or hospital or something. I mean I would have to explain how I found her but that wouldn't matter much would it?

While Nanamin was in his own head, Yuji was busy trying to get Sukuna's opinion on the situation.

”do you think she killed someone? Maybe she escaped something. What if we took her home?”

”shes not a dog you brat. We barely have enough space and that stuffy house any goddamn ways— another body means less space”

”maybe a temporary stay? Just to make sure she's okay. What if she's bleeding?”

”looking like Carry's twin, she's probably not. Maybe it just got poured on her”

”we don' know that.. ” Yuji mutters as his eyes glaze over your blood drenched figure. You were wearing what looked like a hospital gown, he could still see the little tab on your wrist.

Did you leave the hospital? Did you escape it?

Your eyes were still open but it looked like you were sleeping. The sight made him shiver a bit— it's just odd.

This whole thing was 'odd' in Sukuna's opinion. He thinks he should just ditch you in the side of the road instead of taking you back home or to the station. The questioning of how they found you would make them question why they were even out there in the first place.

And there is no real good excuse to give, underground fights always take place far outside the city only way they won't get caught. Even if the police already know. The only reason they don't come out here to shut them down is just because they're lazy sacks of fat shit— Sukuna's eyes scan over you, trying to sense if you were more trouble then it's worth.

And you are a freaky sight to see. You have on a mini pink backpack with a hospital gown on?? Odd fashion choice but he's seen Megumi in his 'experimental' faze so he's not judging too hard. Your hair is messy— wild. Sweet looking curls but extra friz, voluminous hair puffed out way more then it would regularly be.

Did you kill someone?? Would be the most likely answer. Sukuna didn't know what it was about you but your strange— to strange for them. And they were some weird fucked people.

”So where we dropping the freaky fuck off to?”

Nanami rubs his face to massage the incoming migraine this whole ordeal might be.

”could you not be so rude? We're just gonna take her home. Shoko can check her out there”

”we're gonna bring Carry home with us? Great.”

”stop acting like a brooding teenager and just ..I don't know, be quiet? Go back to sleep or something”

”yeah kuna,” Yuji shoves him in the gut ”your acting like you haven't done grosser things”

”keep your hands off me brat. I'm not saying she's gross im saying we don't know what trouble she could cause”

As the two continue to bicker over if it's a logical decision to bring you home or not, you on the other hand were just in a sleepy haze. Unsure of what to do or what's going on, not too sure where your going but knowing from which you came.

The only clear thing was that you're with a shaggy blonde and another two piles of meat, but for now your hunger was fulfilled

authors note: hiiii I had fun making this first chpter to a series no one will read 🌚 ill probably maks ch2 whenever

@raggasopretty and @bigraggatheopstoppa are responsable for all his works!! You post on other sites, translate, or claim as your will cause me to rock your shit BACK!! soooo don't <3

[hotchsreader]

You’re my Last Call

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: You and Hotch had broken up over a month ago. Once he broke up with you, he disappeared, absolutely no contact with you anymore. You didn’t know why, there were no signs he was unhappy until he just broke off everything. Up until a freak accident happens, you thought you had lost the love of your life. What if that was never the case, and he just thought you’d be better off without his sadness?

trigger warning: car accident

read on ao3 here

Now there's blood on the windshield

And there's credit cards on the floor

And I'm crawling out the window of my passenger side door

Your picture's on the dashboard and that's the only thing I saw

You were always first to catch me when I fall

Yeah, I'm sorry you were my last call

- Lyrics from the song 3/13 by Wyatt Flores

Hotch was trying to remind himself of the good days when things felt less heavy and he could have a clear head. These days? Everything felt so heavy that he didn’t know if it was possible not to be stressed out. He had broken up with you weeks ago. Maybe it has been a month already, he was unsure at this point. He knew that his presence was a downer to everyone around him, and you had been too much of a light in the world to let him dull you. He loved you so much, but he knew that letting you go would be the best option for you to succeed.

Everything felt like it was going so slowly. He had left the office about an hour ago and was headed toward the victim's house to do one last walk-through to see if there was anything that the local police had missed. He knew exactly where he was going as he and the team had been there before, so he did not even tell anyone he was going there or put the location in his GPS. He had been paying attention, he wasn't too tired, he had slept pretty well the night before, and nothing but you were on his mind. He looked down at his dashboard, to see the photo of you he kept there. Even though he left, he kept you with him. He always wanted to keep you with him, other than Jack, you were his biggest source of happiness. He had looked down for a split second, but apparently, that was enough time for a far to cross into Hotch’s lane and slammed him into the wall lining the highway.

-

After the car crashed, Hotch couldn’t remember anything until he felt himself on the concrete ground and saw random faces flashing back and forth over the top of him.

“Sir. Is there anyone we can call for you?” They asked hoping to get an answer from the man lying in front of them. They knew there was a strong chance there was a concussion.

Hotch could hardly muster up many words, all he said was your name. Your name and said check the phone.

-

You were at work. Everyone else had started going home, and the law office was closed for the day. There wasn’t any noise as you sat typing your last report on your laptop, it seemed peaceful almost. That was until, your phone started ringing incredibly loud, piercing through the silence.

“Maam. This is Officer Finch. I have a man here by the name of Aaron Hotchner, he was in a car accident. He gave us you to call.”

“Where is he? He is a Federal Agent.”

Before the officer even finished giving you the details of where Aaron was, you had already grabbed all of your things and ran out of the office. By the time you hung up with him, you were only ten minutes away.

Nothing would stop you from getting to him. Nothing that happened between the two of you would make you not rush to his side. He was, and would always be, your person.

When you got there, the first thing you noticed were the lights and the sirens. It brought back so many memories from when Hotch was hurt by Foyet. your heart was pounding in your chest and you just needed to find him to see that he was okay. an officer waved you over, and you saw him lying on the ground. There was a cut across his forehead, and his eyes were grimacing like he was in pain. It was killing you, even though you hadn’t even fully gotten up to him to see him in that kind of condition. He looked almost pitiful. you weren’t sure if you wanted to talk to him because of how badly he had hurt you so you stood and talked to the paramedics who said that it was most likely that he had a concussion, but that he was going to be fine he was very lucky. The person had crossed his lane of traffic and when they did, it caused his car to swerve headfirst into the highway wall.

You heard a soft voice call your name. It was very quiet, almost like it was reserved. They didn’t want to be calling your name. They didn’t want you to know that they needed you at this moment. you didn’t know what to do because doing this was wrong to be an emergency contact on a person who had tried so hard to remove you from their life. One day everything was okay, holding hands laughing together, knowing each other’s favorite orders at the coffee shop, to not even a phone call explaining why everything ended with a snap of a finger.

“Yeah, Aaron I’m here,” you said softly in his ear, as you finally walked over to him, kneeling next to him and running your hands through his hair. That was always a small comfort for him when he really needed somebody he loved you running your fingers through his hair.

“ I am so sorry but you were the only person I wanted to be here, I know I am probably the last person you want to hear from right now.” His voice was still very soft, almost like it hurt to speak and he wanted to tell him to stop talking to focus on getting to the hospital, but you also wanted to hear what he had to say. Selfish as it was, you wanted to know why. Why did he end everything? Why did he act like he didn’t exist after two years of a beautiful relationship, why did he call you now he had his whole team that would break down walls to get to him if they knew something was wrong? Why did he call you a person who genuinely couldn’t do anything but be there for him?

“We will talk when you’re able to form a coherent sentence, Aaron, I'm here now and I’m definitely not leaving until I know you’re okay.” You rubbed his face with your hand, and he pressed his face into your palm.

you sat there as they loaded him into the ambulance and asked if you were allowed to ride along. They said yes, considering it was not life-threatening. You could drop your car at a gas station and they would come by and pick you up to take you with him. you did not want to be where you couldn’t see him, but you trusted the paramedics to take care of him for the five minutes he would be out of your line of sight. once you got into your car, you texted the team. You still had all of their phone numbers in case of emergency to let them know what was going on and your phone started ringing off the hook.

“What is going on?” JJ was on the other side of the phone. her voice made you calm down a little bit. The two of you had become very close friends during your relationship with Aaron and even after he had broken up with you JJ always kept in contact.

“They said that a car came into his lane and knocked him into the highway wall. He was conscious and able to talk, and I went with him to the hospital. I have to drop my car off at a gas station so it wouldn’t be stuck on the side of the highway.” You responded, your voice becoming wobbly during your explanation.

She gulped pretty heavily, you knew this was hard for her to hear. as well. “Do you want me to come up? I’m more than willing to come and just be a helping hand for you. I could be the communication between the team to let them know how he’s doing so you don’t have to constantly be on your phone and keep everyone updated. I can do it for you.” She knew how hard this was for you, and that small gesture would be such a relief, and would take so much off your plate that you didn’t even know how to deal with it.

“JJ you mean the world to me. Could you also contact Jessica and let her know what’s going on? I really don’t wanna have to call her even though I love her. This is just so much and I need to check on him and be with him.”

“Absolutely. I’ll see you soon. I love you.” She said you could feel how genuine she was in the last few words. Meeting Aaron was one of the best things that ever happened to you, but meeting her was a close second. You reciprocated and hung up the phone, got to the gas station, got into the ambulance, and off to the hospital you went. You held on to Hotch’s hand the entire time.

-

The next three hours consisted of people running in and out of the hospital room, checking on Hotch, readjusting him, checking his vitals, and it felt like almost complete chaos. The minute JJ got there you could almost cry out of relief. You needed someone else there, to make this seem like less of a fever-induced dream. To bring you back to reality, almost like a shared experience instead of being alone in a hospital room with the love of your life being poked and prodded by hospital staff.

“Hi sweetie,” JJ says as she walks into the room, tears in her eyes as she looks over at Hotch. You know the two of them are close, he always has talked highly of her.

“Hi.” This was the first time you have heard your own voice in hours and it sounded almost foreign to you. It sounded defeated and hurt.

“Why are you here JJ?” This caused you to jump. Hotch had not spoken the entire three hours until JJ walked into the room. Did he just not want to speak to you? If this was the case, why did he ask everyone to call you? You turned your head over to him, a look of hurt running over your face. He noticed immediately and turned his head away from you to look at JJ.

“You know what, I’m going to go call the team, I’ll be back in a minute. You better prepare yourself for Garcia to run in here with balloons in snacks in a few hours Hotch.” She tried to make the atmosphere less tense before she left, but the hurt and anger in you could physically feel it.

You stood up, walked over to Hotch, and put your hand under his chin, and made him look at you. He stared at you for a minute, tears gathering in his eyes as he did and he tried to open his mouth to speak but you didn’t let him get that far.

“Absolutely not, you do not get to speak right now Aaron Hotchner. You do not get to be the first one to speak after what you have put me through in the last few hours. I get to speak first.”

He nodded at you, tears slipping from his eyes.

“You LEFT me with no explanation. You are the love of my life. I would lay down everything I am and will be to make sure you and Jack are safe and happy. I did nothing wrong to deserve to be deserted. I did nothing, Aaron. I love you so much, I will love you until the day I die. Why would you have them call me? Why would you do what you did?” At this point, you were sobbing, and the last few words that came out of your mouth were gargled.

Hotch raised his hand and wiped the tears from your cheek, you wanted to turn away but your brain and arm betrayed you and you raised your hand up to hold his while it was on your face.

“Honey, it had nothing to do with you. You are the most beautiful, loving, caring person in this world.”

“But then why? What was wrong? What happened to us?”

“It was me. I was bringing you down. I was making everything worse. I didn't want to ruin your life with my hurt.” The last few words were barely a whisper.

You looked up, for the first time since this conversation started, and looked at the man in front of you. He was crying, tears falling down the side of his face onto the pillow. He was gripping your hard really hard, the ring on your fingers digging into your skin. He looked pitiful. He was heartbroken, not just because of what currently happened but because of everything going on in his head. You had wished he would’ve told you this a lot sooner. So much hurt could have been prevented if he had just been honest with you. But you knew this man, you knew he would hide things so deeply inside himself if it meant no one else had to get hurt. You knew he would hide things if it meant you would be protected from the harsh realities.

“Aaron. You are and will always be my world. If something is bothering you, I would like to talk about it. I would like to be able to be there for you if you would let me be. Please, just talk to me. Let me be there for you.” You put your hand on his cheek and he leaned into your palm. His face was flush from the accident and from the tears. He felt, defeated.

“I don’t want anyone to have to deal with me. Especially not someone who has so much to offer this world. I am just a mess of a man. You were the last person I wanted to call because I do not want you to have to clean up after me.”

“If loving you means I have to be there for everything, every sad day, every hard day, every difficult day, I will be.” You said, running your hands through his hair, his favorite.

“I don’t want you to have to do that.”

“Too late, I am already too committed.”

“You know, I was looking at my photo of you on my dashboard before it happened.” He turned his head closer to you.

“You have a photo of me in your work car?” You truly didn’t know this.

“Have the moment we started dating. It's a photo of you smiling at work when I came to visit for the first time. You were so excited to show me around to everyone. Your boyfriend is a Unit Chief in the FBI. You were so smiley the entire time, I wanted to remember that happiness on hard days. So in my work car, it sits, it's comforting.”

“Well, we can take more photos.” You sat on the edge of the bed, he sat up and you leaned into him. You were not going anywhere.

“I love you, you know that. I’m sorry for leaving, I just thought I was hurting you more than I was helping. I thought if you knew how bad I was feeling you would feel responsible or that I would hurt you.”

“I love you more than you know.”

-

After the talk, and JJ called the team to let them know the extent of everything going on, you decided to walk with her to get some coffee. Penelope had shown up five minutes after JJ ended the call with tons of goodies for Hotch, and you let her and Derek sit in there with him while you took a break. Hopefully, he would be okay, Derek could handle Penelope and Hotch needed a friend.

The two of you walked along side each other in silence until you got to the elevator. Once you got to the elevator JJ finally spoke up.

“Want to tell me what happened?” She looked at you sideways as she finished the question.

“Actually, yeah. What he said made me a bit worried and I need some more insight into what’s been going on.”

“I’m all ears.”

“He broke up with me because he’s having a hard time mentally. Has he been weird or more restricted at work at all?” You asked the question as you got into the elevator.

“A bit. I thought maybe it was due to the breakup but honestly it’s been going on a few months. I try not to pry because while he is my boss and my friend, i don’t want him to think i don’t trust him.”

“I understand that completely. I knew something was up, but I didn’t think he’d leave me just because he didn’t want to talk about it. I think we’re on the same page now, but i’m not letting this go. I love him too much.”

“He loves you too, trust me. Your photo is in his car, on his phone, in his office. You and Jack are his world. I honestly think he’s just scared.” As you got out of the elevator together she turned and hugged you. knowing you haven’t had one since this all happened. You loved your best friend, and she always knew what you needed.

-

Hotch was in the hospital for a day. They wanted to keep him overnight just for observation, but it turned out everything was okay. He had a concussion and a few cuts on his head but he was going to be fine. you were by his bedside the entire time you slept there you only left to go to the bathroom or if somebody else came and made you go get a cup of coffee. Usually it was JJ or Derek that convinced you to get up, despite Hotch telling you countless times it was okay to go home. You truly just were so happy to have him back you didn’t want to leave him again.

You both had walked to your car so you could drive him home. Jessica was keeping Jack for one more night that way Hotch could settle down at home and make sure that he was okay and you were going to stay with him tonight, because there was no way you were going to let him be alone.

“You know we have to talk about everything, right?” you said the minute you both got into the car.

“Yeah honey, I know.” He reached over and grabbed your hand and squeezed it hard.

“Why did you do this? I know you’re hurting. I would do anything to make you happy and feel loved and appreciated, that’s my goal when i’m with you. I’d do anything for you.”

“That’s the point, I just don’t want you to have to take care of me. I want to be there for you.” He started looking out of the window, like that was going to make his hurt get up and fly away.

“ Now you know a relationship is 50/50, and sometimes on bad days it’s 20/80. We give what we can, my love, and if you’re having a bad day I am more than willing to pick up the slack.” It was your turn to squeeze his hand, to bring him back to reality and remember that you were here, and that you were not going anywhere.

“I am embarrassed.” You looked over at him to see him, start to cry, genuine tears falling from his eyes, the look of defeat and hurt and embarrassment falling over his face. it was the saddest you had ever seen someone look and it absolutely shattered your heart to see him like that.

“Absolutely not,” You pulled over and stopped the car, “you have NO reason to be embarrassed about having a hard time Aaron Hotchner. You have been through more in the past few years than I could ever imagine. I don’t think I would be up walking around if I had gone through what you had been through. I would not be as good of a man as good of a dad as good of a person if I had been through what you had to go through. you give it your all every single day, whether it be as a father or as the leader of a team that saves peoples lives and every single day. you deserve somebody that not only wants to be with you at your best but somebody that will be there for you at your worst and I will be there for you. Always.” You took his face in your hands and turned him to look at you. He was still crying so you wiped his tears with your thumbs, and looked him in the eyes. You leaned in and gave him a big kiss. A kiss to cement everything you just said. So he knew, you were completely serious.

“Okay. I am sorry for what I've done, but for you, I am willing to try. I am willing to accept my downfalls, and lean on you when I need you. And you will never be my last call again, you will always be my first.”

“I better be.”

That got a smile out of him, and a small chuckle. You kissed him again and started the car back up, put it in drive, and took you both home.

[onlyjaeyun]

i'm gonna log off for a while because i'm really mentally drained from constantly hearing how unhappy and disappointed some of you guys were with both SB and CH'snendings and developments.

i know some of you guys come from a good place and mean no harm but imagine working on something for so long and then you yourself are already sad about how things ended but you wanna use it as a way to do better next time but people constantly tell you how you should do better next time and its always "i was so excited but it never came" and "i wished things would have gone this way" after you spent days crying out of frustration because your brain didn't corporate.

people who have never written (one shots or series doesnt matter) don't know the burden of leaving unfinished works up there. i keep telling you guys that i tried so hard to somehow give you guys an ending because if i hadn't you guys would have never received ANY ending so i tried to make the best of it.

i dont take the hate to heart anymore bc i couldnt care less and i know as a writer i should be open to criticism but i'm a little tired of my work being constantly nitpicked when i do this for fun.

i know updating daily was what burnt me out pls stop telling me that i obviously overestimated myself i fucking know.

whatever, it actually doesn't matter anymore because CH is over and i dont think i'll ever write smaus that long ever again bc the criticism is so not worth the mental effort and stress.

i do this for FUN. you know how artists doodle in their notebooks, this is what this blog is to me. i make mistakes, i over/underestimate things and myself bc this is life. it's just..not that deep for y'all to constantly camp in my inbox and make me feel bad about it when i already accepted it.

i'm gonna do some self reflection and think about it all so take care babies 🤍

[daichiduskdrop]

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚⋆·˚ ༘ *𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Chapter 19

Pairing: BTS Ot7 X fem! reader

Genre: A/B/O AU, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to lovers,

Warnings: mentions of blood, a bit of gore too.

Words: 3329

A/N at the end, please read!

Taglist: @thelilbutifulthings @ilovemoneymorethenmen @singukieee @cherrysainttt @felicityroth @mageprincess7 @lucis-noctiana @danielle143 @osakis-gf @girl-nahh @vintageoldfashion @neverthefirstchoice @juju-227592 @silentreadersthings @i-have-no-life-charlie @everyonehatesshani @iamkookiesforyou @dragons-flare @fangirl125reader @roseidol @frieschan @popcatx0 @liz67900 @exfolitae

Previous:

⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

Taehyung could feel his blood boil. You were the softest, nicest little thing he ever met; how could anyone not like you?

Your classmates, he felt rage rumble deep underneath his skin just at the thought of them. They didn't like you? So be it. The alpha hated them like no one else, despising them.

How dare they be so unwell towards you?! You never did one thing wrong to them, and you never even whined in their presence. You always complied with and obeyed their ridiculous wants and needs.

He was pissed—no, he was furious—already standing up after pushing the broken notebook off his lap. The heavy scent of anger filled the room.

A few growls could be heard throughout the room. This was not okay, and they were not happy.

Namjoon held you close to himself, your face squished against his scent gland, his hands squeezing you to his body.

A deep rumble carried through the bottom of his chest, and a small yelp left you, making him to immediately stop.

„Baby no, no, it's okay... I'm not angry at you, pup, alright? Hm? Can you tell me their names, baby? Alpha will go and have a chat with them." He murmured, watching you closely.

Running his knuckles gently over your skin, he tried to coax the names out of you; a few of the other packmates were quick to catch on.

No omega would be happy to see violence. They would go around it for you. Their intentions were quite clear to understand, though the heavy scents they didn't carry weren't telling enough.

After Yoongi came back in the middle of your soft stuttering like sobs when you were telling them what has been going on for a while now, he soon listened in and understood.

He was more than angry; the alpha has never felt such irritation before. He already had quite an interesting call with your class teacher.

While the man didn't necessarily seem like a straight-up terrible man, he should have known better. Making you cry and so stressed out for a reason, purely out of your hands was more than punishable. 

And so the alpha was furious, understandably so. Jungkook also seemed to be greatly unhappy; his jaw clenched while he tightened his fists.

The still-young and quite hormonal alpha wasn't doing so well. Since the pack has pretty much already started imprinting on you, they were very unhappy, knowing that possibly their own omega has been bullied for such a long time.

„Princess, come to oppa now... Let's go take a nap for a bit, hm? I bet you are tired, sweetie." The alpha whispered out, fully aware of what would go down once you were out of earshot.

Wanting you to not have to listen too much, Jimin knew that you were probably still very tired. It was only understandable; you were an omega, and those have to sleep for long hours regularly.

Letting go of you reluctantly, the younger alpha pulled you from Namjoon's warm arms, cooing loudly and helping you wrap your legs around his waist.

Nuzzling your head, the alpha giggled softly, happy to hold you. Smiling widely, he nuzzled your cheek, letting his soft lips ghost over your skin.

Standing up, the eldest also followed along, running his fingers through your hair as you let your head rest against the alpha's collarbone, getting more sleepy by the second.

Walking up the stairs, Jimin swayed you gently, making sure you were sleepy enough as he made his way to his room.

He had a nice, spacious bed and was very aware that you would be able to sleep much better in the heavy alpha's scents surrounding you.

After all, the youngest alphas oftentimes hung out in this room, and so it was full of different smells, bringing further comfort.

Holding you to his chest with one arm, he uncovered the blanket, crawling gently on the mattress. Coming in after him, Jin waited for his packmate to settle down with you before he also went into the bed.

Spooning you, the eldest made sure to turn you away from the doors, the man's wide shoulders shielding you from view.

They needed to make sure you would be safe, especially if they were asleep at the same time as you were.

He wrapped his hands around your waist, pulling your back to his chest while Jimin gently nuzzled your cheeks and face to his warm front.

„Sleep tight, my cub. Alpha's will protect you now, baby.” Jin whispered, gently running his fingers through your hair before he too scented you a bit.

Your eyes soon closed, and the two other men were still a bit watchful and careful of their surroundings, only going to sleep after being absolutely sure nothing would disturb any of you.

And so, you were completely unaware of what was going on downstairs; the packmates were unbelievably livid like never before.

Hoseok was the first one to stand up; his jaw clenched as he started to pull on his boots and jacket, looking through the bowl full of car keys.

„Are you serious?” Taehyung asked, also standing up. Before he got to finish, the youngest packmate had already stood up, kicking over the small table before the couch, the wood shattering into pieces with a loud crack.

Jungkook was furious, his pheromones clouding the whole room. No one, not even Namjoon, said much in answer to his act, feeling just like him, if not worse.

„I'm teaching those fuckers a lesson; they will absolutely not pick on my omega. Bitches don't know what's coming." Hoseok barked out, his voice rough and cold like never before.

Soon, the alphas too got ready, all just about to do the same. Piling into one of the bigger cars, they all went to drive together.

The school wasn't too far, and so the packmates soon got there. It was just about the lunch hour now, meaning that many of the classmates were just standing outside, resting during their break.

The packmates didn't hold back for too long, the classmates apologizing with many words - the alphas weren't the ones that had to be apologized to thought.

It was you that had been so wrongly dealt with, and you never deserved such treatment. But even when the angry pack stood before the two betas, their words didn't seem sincere at all.

The man sealed his fate when he muttered about you just overreacting under his breath. Jungkook jumped into action right away, too angry to hold back any further.

Only after one of the betas jaws seemed to be just about completely disconnected did the packalpha step in, pulling Jungkook off of the man.

The alpha snarled, still not done. Humming out in understanding, his elder only pulled him away further from the student, and the pack members soon pilled in together again.

There wasn't much anyone could do, especially since it happened outside of school. The pack had the full right to do whatever they pleased with the students since it only went with the law.

It was one of the more recent ones; after more and more reports regarding fights and murders, always with similar reasoning, resurfaced, the law changed, and the police no longer stepped in when such things happened, only going over them after to file a report if needed.

A pack was allowed to fully deal with anyone assaulting their packmates. No matter what they were to do to them, the law fully forgave them, and there was no penalty for it as long as it was reasonable.

When the pack got back home, they still felt much anger seeping through the bond. And so, many went on towards the gym, the youngest two and the packalpha being the fastest to be there.

Yoongi and Hobi decided it was best to forget about it for now, at least for a little bit. And so they washed off all the blood on their fists and fully showered, not wanting you to have to taint your sensitive nose with the smell of blood.

Changing into completely different clothes, the two alphas made sure none of the panicked scents the classmates carried before they were fully beaten to unconsciousness wouldn't stick.

Wanting to pamper and coddle you well for a while, the pack would then decide what to do next. Going back to the school you went to was already out of the question; the alphas were more than protective enough to even allow you to come close to the building again.

The two alphas decided that the creamy rose tteokbokki would serve as a good, filling, warm meal for your soft little belly.

And so they got to work, with Yoongi frying the cut-up bacon and sausages until they turned crispy and setting them aside. The other man, meanwhile, allowed the rice cakes to soak in water and diced up the onion and garlic, frying them in a different pan until they turned fragrant.

Hobi added dashi and milk, stirring it until it turned hot. He then poured in the heavy cream, gochujang, and a few other things. The sauce soon formed a comfortable orange shade.

The rose tteokbokki was a much milder version, which is key for you to be able to enjoy it. It was a creamy and cheesy meal, and the alphas were sure you would enjoy it a lot.

And so, the older alpha thinly sliced the fish cakes, adding the peeled boiling eggs. He made sure to boil at least eight or nine, blanching them in ice-cold water before starting to peel the shell off.

Hoseok then added the meat and rice cakes, turning off the heat and letting the mozzarella and Swiss cheese melt. Incorporating it, he sprinkled in a small bit of sesame oil.

Preparing eight deep plates, the alpha started serving everyone, always sprinkling on a bit of spring onion. It was best to eat it while it was still hot.

Taking the four plates each, the alphas started to walk slowly upstairs, the chopsticks and a few spoons pocketed in their pants.

Opening the doors slowly, Hobi walked in first, smiling widely when he saw the two alphas holding you so close.

Jin woke up right away, turning around quickly and looking over his shoulder while he pulled you closer to himself.

Recognising his packmates, he sighed out, laying back against the pillow, his shoulder sagging.

Coming closer, Yoongi looked over his elder's shoulder, cooing gently and caressing your cheek. You looked cuddly like never before, your face squished against the younger man's chest, his own head laying against the top of yours, covering you softly.

Even in his sleep, the alpha stayed protective, his warm hands holding you close. If anyone would even try to take you away, Jimin would wake up immediately; Yoongi was sure of it.

Placing the many plates down on the floor, Hobi went to wake them all up, Jin slowly blinking the sleep away. They didn't get to sleep for too long, but lunch had passed long before.

Most of the alphas already left the gym, with Jungkook being the last. Also washing themselves, the men were ready for some late lunch, with Yoongi taking them to Jimin's room.

They wouldn't be able to fit really comfortably, but they didn't care. You seemed happy in the bed, with many blankets and pillows around you, soft against your fingers.

Sitting up, Jimin placed you on his lap with your back right against his chest, resting himself against the headboard.

He was still more than tired. He was used to sleeping in late during their vacation time, and since they entered hiatus, he had more time to replenish his energy.

Sure, they were still planning many performances, but the alphas were now focusing more on their solo careers, and after so many years of endless stress and work, they were happy to finally let up for a bit.

The packmates realised that it was important to help you settle in well, and so they were planning on staying home and overall be with you more often.

They already had many vacations planned ahead, wanting to enjoy true packlife for the first time since their childhood.

Staying in, huddled together in a den, was a part of such activities, but since the alphas were usually not really cuddly and soft with one another, only very little, they didn't have a proper one.

They would invest in a nice, big mattress soon, though, making sure you would have a nice place where you could rest and nest. It was very important.

And so, the packmates all soon one after another littered in, their hair still a bit damp, but they didn't want to spend any time away from you, preferring instead to stay with you.

It was complicated for the alphas to have you out of their sight for now, and that feeling will definitely take a while to outgrow.

Squeezing in closer to one another, the pack members climbed into the bed, soon chewing on the meal. You reached for your own plate, but your palms were soon gently pulled back to your lap.

Tutting you softly, Taehyung already had a bite on a spoon, just before your lips. You turned away, hiding your cheek in Jimin's shoulder, too shy to take a bite.

„Babycheeks, baby, let Alpha help, ...sweetie; come on, be a good girl now, hm?” Quick to coax you out, the man plucked the bite right between your plush-like lips, smiling widely as you chewed.

„Hm... Is it good, sunny bub?” Hobi asked, running his palm over your head. He felt himself preening at the thought of you enjoying the food he made.

And you liked it; the spice was not too much for you, letting you enjoy the meal well. You nodded vigurously at the taste of chewy rice cakes and crispy bacon, a heavy combination.

The packmates made sure your cheeks wouldn't be left empty for any longer than necessary, keeping you well fed above themselves.

The most tasty bites were reserved for your tastebuds only, with the alpha pheromones wafting widely throughout the room.

Now that they had done what was necessary to your classmates, they were left with the aftermath of the sudden rage, worry, and protectiveness clouding their senses.

Warming you up between many blankets, the pack rested together, and the food soon finished. Handing you a water bottle lying around, Yoongi held it to your lips, not allowing you to drink fully by yourself.

Cooing at how well you swallowed, he praised you gently, patting your hair. „Good girl...” He whispered, smiling softly.

The alphas felt relief that you were once again safely tucked away in their arms, with no intruder able to harm you.

Looking at you fondly, the packalpha knew that he had to clear up some confusion regarding their next steps.

„Pup, let's talk now, okay? About what will happen now, baby... Listen to alphas explain for a little bit, my sweetest girl.” He said, sighing out before he continued.

Namjoon realised well that going all alpha against the teacher and classmates probably wasn't the best idea they had, but at the time and for the right reasons, it felt right.

He was still quite careful and reasonable, making sure none of the students or even the teacher would be harmed so much they would have harsh health issues in the future.

Things like smaller scars would keep the memories of their past mistakes fresh. The packmates didn't do much but threw a few punches here and there, mostly just wanting to make sure, nothing like that would ever happen again.

The pack alpha realised that some sort of police officer regarding pack affairs would probably knock on their pack house doors the upcoming morning, but he was more than ready to explain everything.

All of the pack members documents were well updated, and you didn't really need any yet since you weren't properly a part of the pack.

Until you get marked at least.

Your ID was well above enough, and he was sure you had some sort of identification tucked away somewhere in your wallet.

Namjoon knew that even if what they did was a bit drastic, it was absolutely reasonable and not even overreacting. Alphas get more protective if their own omegas are in harm's way.

„I don't think any of us will agree with you coming back to your college now; do you understand why, sweetheart? It's not safe for you, and alphas really really really don't like that, okay?”

With his packmates nodding along, a few of the men ran their fingers over you, softly shushing any questions you might have. Everything would be explained soon; you didn't have to worry about a thing now.

„Yea cub, it's really not good for you, okay? But I can imagine you still want to continue your studies, don't you?" The eldest asked, his hand resting against the back of your head.

You nodded quickly. Good education was the key to everything, and you loved art. If you got the chance to unlock the doors of new possibilities with it, you were more than interested.

„Okay, princess, that's a good thing, baby. I'm very proud of you.”

Jimin whispered in your ear, his chin running over your head in soft, gentle caresses. His scent went over you; the mixture of your natural aroma with his created a nice new mix.

„You could always try to go to a different school, babycheeks, but I think that isn't really the best solution." One of the younger alphas said, Your palm held in his while he watched you closely. 

„I don't think so either. Such stress isn't healthy for you, bunnybun; we can't have that now, can we?” Jungkook said, smiling to try and lift the mood a little.

„Absolutly not. I thought about online lessons instead; how about that kitten? Would you like that, hm?” Yoongi cooed at you, bopping your nose softly.

Thinking over the possibilities, you shrug your shoulders, not sure what it would really mean.

„I thought about that too. It would be a lot easier with our schedule, and it would be much more personal and professional.

I think you would also learn much more cub. And it should be less stressful too, since you would never have to be with so many new people again." Namjoon said, coaxing you to gently nod. You weren't fully sure yet, but you trusted them a lot, and they valued that even more.

„I'm not sure yet oppa... But I can try. I think online classes would be a bit better too, as long as I have some sort of studio I can still visit for all the things I need.” You said.

You never had an easy time making new friends, and so school with so many different people often caused issues and unreasonable stress.

Art school especially could be quite nerve-wracking, and the alphas realised that well. They wanted to make sure you wouldn't drop like that again, prevention was key.

Smiling widely at you, Hobi felt his mood lift a bit. „Thank you so much sunshine... Alpha will set up everything for you; you don't have to worry about a thing. Our small baby can just rest her pretty eyes.”

You felt yourself blush a little, turning your gaze away from the alpha. Laughing even louder, he ran his fingers over your ankles softly, your legs stretched out over his lap.

„I'll look up some teachers later, okay, pup? You can choose of course my baby. How about we watch some movies for now? I thought we could go to the mall later; how bout that?”

The alphas realised well that you needed a few necessities, like some new clothes like different undergarments. You didn't pack that many the few nights before.

„Oh, and also, I called with one of the doctors for omegas, sweetheart; I'll make you an appointment soon, okay? The medicine your older doctor gave you isn't good for you, pup.”

„If you want to take the heat suppressants, you can cub, that is your thing to decide upon. But still, you should have a check up. It's important to have those regularly.”

Namjoon and Jin said, your palm caressed between his. Smiling at you reassuringly when he smelled anxiousness go through your scent, the alphas surrounding you were quick to step in, making sure you knew that you were safe and sound.

„Sh-sh-sh, babycheks, don't fret little baby. Alpha is here, right here."

„No princess, don't worry. Alphas are here now, and you don't need to be scared, baby.”

„That's right, peaches, don't be afraid of anything. Doctors aren't scary cubs, and we will be there the whole time; how about that?”

„...hm? Of course, bunbun, if you want to, I'll hold your hand the entire time; of course, alpha will. You are such a good girl, aren't you?”

„Yes, kitty, you can sit on oppa's lap too if you'll feel like it. You can always sit on alpha's lap, my kitten.”

 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *

A/N: okay, I'll be honest. I'm not so sure how I feel about the violence in this chapter, I'm not fully sure. I understand that a lot of you feel angry at the classmates for being unfair and mean to the MC, but I don't fully like how I wrote this.

I don't think everything is understandable well, since the pack dynamics overall are just like that in my story and I hope it's to no one's issue.

I don't want this to be a yandere themed story!

I might edit parts of it though, so if it changes a bit, please don't be worried.

Lots of love, take care of yourself :)

Next:

[jennelikejennay]

Do you ever get in a state where you're so busy going from thing to thing to thing, all of which is non optional, that you can't even seem to decompress enough to feel any kind of way about it?

You finish a stressful thing and you're so tired you can't seem to do anything but stare into the middle distance or scroll on something. And deep down you know you want to be creative or social or something that gives you joy, but you're too tired to even daydream about doing it.

I don't know if I have less capacity than everybody else, or we all feel that way all the time and that's why everybody's so unhappy under capitalism, but I feel that way whenever I'm employed and it's like...do I have to sacrifice everything I love, every part of myself that makes me feel alive, just to survive and be a contributing member of society?

[twopoppies]

I don't really have any active fandom friends anymore so I don't have anyone to share this thought with, but you're always so fair and lovely to Harry that it feels kinda. safe and appropriate to message you about it?

Maybe I'm spoiled because I mainly follow og larries here as far as I'm aware, and I feel like larries or at least the ones I've surrounded myself with have like... an extra layer of protection and respect towards Lou and Harry? So I was a bit shocked when I just stumbled upon a Harrie (update?) blog that posts all kinds of pictures and videos of him looking terribly unhappy, and since they don't post anything but these pics others have taken of him, like, there's no personality to the blog, no throwbacks even, it kinda allows you to just see this... disturbing timeline of Harry throughout the years just looking unhappy as all hell.

It's such a contrast because I mainly watch tour things or old clips and pics or the occasional new content where he doesn't look absolutely miserable. Anyway, seeing picture after picture of him looking tired, just exhausted, is so sad. I don't know. The world really isn't fair to him, he gets so much shit when really he's the sweetest little pea, he's radient, he's caring, he's the epitome of sunshine when he's surrounded by people with good intentions, his best at heart.

I don't know, I guess I've build this bubble around him and Louis and I so easily forget that there's the, well, public. The fame. The fans that care more for a picture than his comfort. The public at large with this perception of him as some sex symbol rockstar they can fancy and fantasize about. Like. It's sobering and horrible? The difference between Harry Styles™ and Harry feels so stark and. Yeah. Guess I'm just saying I wish he had it easier, had it fair. Not that his life is just a horrible tragedy, course not, but just. Wish it wasn't this harsh is all

Hi, darling. I can only comment generally without knowing the blog or what they post. But I think it's pretty easy to pick and choose photos where someone only looks happy or only looks tired and miserable, you know? I know there's a group of people who are convinced Jeff/Irving are torturing him and overworking him, so every time Harry looks less than ecstatic, they're handwringing. And context matters, too. What is he doing in the photos? Where is he going? Who is he with? What's happening behind the scenes? etc etc. Besides that, I agree with you that his life isn't always sunshine and roses. You can have all the money and fame in the world and still not always be happy. I'm sure his job can be very stressful; he's juggling a lot of things, tons of people's livelihoods rely on him, he's in the public eye constantly, and fans demand engagement from him constantly...it's probably tiring at times. And, yeah, thinking about the idea that tens of thousands of people are fantasizing about you and judging you and gossiping about you is bizarre and uncomfortable. I couldn't be famous for any amount of money. But my impression of him is that he is, overall, a happy person. And I think he knows how incredibly privileged and lucky he is to have the life he has. And I think he's learned how to protect himself from the weird/upsetting/dangerous parts of his career. At least as much as one can.

I don't know if that helps at all. I worry about him at times, too. But I think he has a good group around him who love him for real and not just for what he can do for them.

[fanfic-the-wish-your-heart-makes]

Gotham Characters' Reactions to the Reader Being Stressed Because They Have a Lot to Do Part 1

Reader: gender-neutral (without any pronouns) Warnings: mentions of illegal ways to get a good grade

Edward Nygma:

He's very intelligent, so if the subject is nothing too niche he will learn about it himself. You might think that he wouldn't find the time, but this man once rearranged an entire room of folders in his free time (much to Kristen's dismay), and he's ready to put in more effort for you. If you had to learn something, he'd love to quiz you by making small little riddles. .... "Almost. Do you need another hint? It ends with an e."...."Nope, silent e."

If all your time was taken up by your task, he'd make you meals or give you some dessert you like. Prepare yourself for a note on it, he'll write a related riddle on it.

If things get too far - that is, if you're too stressed, even if you mutter "I'm fine." - never leave your utensils lying around, because you will come back to find them gone, with him waiting for you, not giving them back before you answer the riddle, "You desperately need it to escape it becoming the verb that will happen to you if you don't take it, what is it?" You're too tired for this, "Please just tell me, Eddie." He puts his hands on your shoulders in a comforting way, and looks into your eyes, saying, "A break. You desperately need a break. You've been working for too long." Let's just say that he's good at hiding stuff.

Jim Gordon:

He's almost too good at giving you time and space. If you throw yourself into work, he'll do the same, and might end up having more work to do than you. However if your work overload was caused by someone, he'll have a word with them if possible. He'll give pretty much anyone hell, from the normal office worker to some rich guy from higher up. The only scenario in which he wouldn't call them out is if your boss was one of the big players...not that he wouldn't yell in Oswald's face.

Oswald Cobblepot:

Speaking of Oswald's pretty face, it would look very displeased if you of all people were being bothered with too much work. He didn't work his way up just to see that the people he cares about are unhappy, or in your case overworked.

He offers to let someone else do your work or bribe someone to change your results, that's just what he thinks of as a solution: the person he loves wouldn't be stressed out, which is the only thing that matters. Regardless of your decision, you'll be showered in supportive hugs and/or gestures, as usual. Your smaller tasks will be taken care of, and if the root of your work problem is someone, they will be intimidated.

[yggdraseed]

An Incomplete Analysis of the Sukunadome

I stress the point that this is an inherently incomplete analysis. It's getting late, I'm tired and unhappy, and… well, the fight isn't over yet, so there's no way this analysis could be complete even if I felt like it. However, it's on my mind, and I feel the need to start exerting myself more on these things. Sometimes sweat is the better medicine. I know this is a long one and doesn’t have any pictures, but if we all support each other, we’ll get through it together.

Full disclosure, I wish more people had gotten filtered by this fight and just stopped talking about Jujutsu Kaisen by now. Like yeah, I think it's great different people see things in different ways, but let's all be honest with ourselves here, most of the people criticizing this fight are not doing so with any sort of literary or artistic perspective or good faith. Most of it is Gojo fans who are still crying, seething, vomiting, pissing, and shitting over the fact that the character they attached their ego to didn't win Jujutsu Kaisen like they wanted. If this describes you, well, this post will probably do you some good, but I'm confident nobody who takes the stance that Gojo should have won would have the space in their mind for what I'm about to say about Sukunadome.

Because that's what I'm calling it. "The Sukuna Cycle" was maybe a little funny for a week or two, but like most memes about this series, it wasn't really based on the story so much as it was on an agenda. Kusakabe was part of the fight since Yuji and Higuruma entered, and up until Miguel, we knew all the combatants who would be tagging in were there. We knew Yuta was off dealing with Kenjaku and would return, we knew Maki was in play, and there really weren't a lot of switches. Just Choso leaving and coming back, Ui Ui retrieving Higuruma's and Gojo's corpses, and… you know, actually, I think that's it. Sure isn't as much as the "Sukuna Cycle" memes made it out to be, huh?

Okay, if you haven't noticed yet, I'm a big JJK fan and a big JJK fandom hater. I think JJK has the worst Western internet fanbase I've seen in a long time, with only a few oases scattered across the internet where you can find intelligent life. Like it's insane what kind of bullshit a person can convince themselves of.

However, I'm not analyzing JJK's fanbase, I'm analyzing JJK. Someday we'll litigate whether or not Lobotomy Kaisen was really funny enough to justify how badly it ruined this fanbase's ability to objectively, productively engage with with one of the most competently written and culturally impactful manga to come out this century. Today is not that day.

So Sukuna's got four arms and knows how to use them. He's got four eyes and so much sass one mouth wasn't enough for the amount of trash he's got to talk to the youths of today. Just on a basic level, having four arms would be such an insignificant power in any other Shonen as to almost be a joke. Yet with how jujutsu sorcery functions as a power system and how adept Sukuna is at using every possible advantage at his disposal - even going so far as to take what probably should be disadvantages and twist them to work for him - having the ability to make hand seals while fighting hand-to-hand, and being able to chant without interrupting his breathing, are inseparable from Sukuna's godlike fighting ability. I love how something seemingly so mundane is such a huge x factor for Sukuna.

We continually see how Sukuna is a complex, but fundamentally vile antagonist. He has a very rich, detailed view of the world, but one that fundamentally reduces every other human being to be his playthings and food. It's just that Sukuna says, "Don't like it? Then get stronger." It's a very Social Darwinist, late stage capitalist view to be coming from the Heian Era, and I think that maybe it's intentional. Shitty people are shitty in mostly the same ways, it's just they find new things to be shitty about or to use to be shitty with.

Like if that were all it is, it'd make Sukuna so effective as a villain to hate and would slot so nicely into Jujutsu Kaisen's overarching social and political commentary. Cruelty within suffering, selfishness as a strength and a weakness, the unfairness of how the strength to pursue one's agency is unevenly distributed and how the haves don’t realize how easily they could have instead been have-nots, it's all there.

But there’s this inherent charisma to Sukuna that I think is intentional. He has this noblesse oblige where he’s so inherently aware of his greatness that he doesn’t have a problem with giving credit where credit is due. Like he talks all the trash when he’s fighting Jogo, but where Gojo’s insults come across as puerile and blunt, Sukuna’s always displaying this wit to him. And when the battle’s over, he acknowledges that even though Jogo wasn’t as strong as him, he was stronger than most and could have gone even further if he hadn’t held himself back. He starts off belittling Gojo in their fight, but by the end, he expresses a profound respect and gratitude towards Gojo. Like it’s a very warped form of those sentiments, but I think it’s sincere. Even with Ishigori, when Sukuna fails to cut him the first time, he just acknowledges it was disrespectful to hold back and that he’ll give it full force the next strike.

Something to keep in mind is that everything Megumi warned Yuji about when it comes to ancient sorcerers applies to Sukuna as well. They’re not treated as uniformly, unambiguously evil anymore than anyone else in JJK is, and are acknowledged as having fundamentally different world views about violence and the value of human life. Kashimo, for instance, seems to value his life only because he’s able to risk his life and lay it on the line. They’re people from an era where children died so young that parents often gave them numbered names so as to not get too attached until they’d see if their kids actually were going to make it or not. If you didn’t give your whole life over to a goal, you probably wouldn’t achieve it. Whereas modern sorcerers, modern people, have all these complex and sometimes contradictory views and needs, ancient sorcerers show a tendency to shave everything away except their one singular conviction because that was what you had to do in an era of much shorter life expectancies and peril on all sides. You’d be very lucky to accomplish one life goal, let alone as many as people of today set out to achieve: graduating high school, graduating college, getting a job, starting a family, and hopefully having one or two passions on the side. Fundamentally different worldviews from fundamentally different periods of history.

And Sukuna is no different. His goal is simple: partake in the many colors and flavors of humanity through mortal combat in the arena of sorcery. Sukuna’s love for sorcery runs deep. He’s always curious about different cursed techniques, even ones that are pedestrian to a sorcerer of his level, like Nanako’s smartphone-based technique. He reminds me of a quote from Baki: “Someone who works hard can never beat someone who enjoys himself.” Sukuna has clearly put forth great effort to master sorcery, but clearly doesn’t see it as work. He sees it as just doing what he enjoys and is good at.

Unfortunately for everyone else, he enjoys killing and is extremely good at it. Sukuna is the ultimate ethical heat death of the “live for yourself, cherish your own agency, don’t let yourself be controlled” mindset that is the ideological starting point of JJK. It’s a very dark, extreme interpretation of Buddhist non-attachment, where even compassion is an attachment to ultimately shed. Sukuna lives perfectly freely, including being free from guilt or compassion.

Naturally, there’s an exception. All things seem to have exceptions. In Sukuna’s case, that would be Uraume. I’ve been fascinated by their dynamic since we first learned of Uraume’s allegiance to Sukuna during Shibuya and I still can’t wait to know more. Suffice to say, Sukuna dotes on Uraume, forgiving their mistakes and seeming to enjoy their company not just because of their service to him, but because their existence makes him happy. I’m reminded of Power in Chainsaw Man, how she was seemingly incapable of empathy or mercy until she met Meowy.

Honestly, Sukuna reminds me a lot of a lot of characters in Chainsaw Man. People who are trying to climb from this state of misery, of struggling just to meet basic desires, and learning to be human. Yet Sukuna is so strong he never needed to learn to be human. He never needed to cooperate with others to survive — or at least, doesn’t seem to believe he did — and so he never saw the value in it. And so he’s basically brute forced his way around having to undergo an arc like Denji’s, and has instead ended up a hedonistic black hole devising all these complicated philosophical arguments to justify what is, really, a very simplistic, predatory desire to only satisfy his basic material wants and creative interests and nothing else for anyone else.

But like, it’s not that simple. If you give to others, you get something immaterial in return. I can’t quantity it or define it, but I’m sure most of you know what I mean. The happiness that comes from taking care of others’ needs, and the deeper levels beyond that happiness. Like I do believe that’s the subtext behind Binding Vows as metaphor: that you almost never give without getting in return. You might not get the same thing back, in the same form, but being changed by the act of putting the needs and wants of others before your own even temporarily still is part of the exchange. It’s part of becoming complete as a human being.

Sukuna has defied that exchange and broken the cycle, and I don’t think it’s inherently for his own benefit. There are some thing about being human that you don’t just get to opt out of, no matter how much you claim you’re more than or less than human. Even if Sukuna doesn’t think he’s lost something of value, he has. And that something of value is inherent to the whole point of this final battle.

Jujutsu Kaisen is basically working on two big problems. There are lots of ideas at play in the series, but there are two fundamental problems for which every fiight, every character arc, every turn of the gears consitutes part of the calculus to solve one or both of those problems.

The first problem, a thematic and philosophical one: “How do you love and fight for something when you know you’re going to die?”

The second problem, a metatextual one: “Is there any artistic and social value left in the Shonen formula as it stands in the modern day?”

And this fight is, ultimately, where GeGe is showing their work. It’s where Yuji has to defeat Sukuna, if not in terms of out-boxing him, then in terms of prevailing over his beliefs about humanity and the world as a whole.

GeGe has stripped Yuji of everything that is supposed to determine the worth of a Shonen protagonist’s victory. He’s not fighting alone, he didn’t go off and train all by himself, he trained with a lot of powerful, smart people who helped him. And Yuji is arguably not even the most important participant in the fight. So why should we care if Yuji wins?

The answer is so simple it’s easy to lose track of it. Yuji is risking his life to rescue someone, his friend, from being exploited, and to save the people of Japan from being exploited. Even after everything that’s happened, Yuji plants his fucking feet and takes a stance that no, shithead, there is such a thing as the right thing. Maybe it isn’t obvious all the time, and it sure as hell isn’t always easy to know what it is, but he knows now with certainty what it isn’t: to exploit others or to destroy yourself. We can find our answers somewhere in-between.

Sometimes we can’t resolve our problems with a tidy solution that makes everyone happy and sometimes we have to carve a piece of ourselves out and give to something we won’t be sure to see the fruition of, but that’s just life. It doesn’t mean we have to throw away all hope for things to get better. Even if the world won’t become utopian, it can still become better, no matter how many nihilists hide their own inequities behind assertions that there is no point.

Nihilism is not a solution to the problems of life, it is the choice to run away and hide. To give into nihilism is to give up the fight even while other people are still fighting all around you.

So that’s the fucking point of the Sukunadome. Nobara already said it better than anyone else has before she made Mahito look like the bitch he was and always will be: “Sometimes you need to fight even when you know you can’t win.” Because you won’t always win and you won’t escape death, nor will you know what lies beyond death. However, you can still live according to your principles and fight for the things you see as meaningful even if other people don’t.

That is why so many characters have come and gone from the fight. All gave some, some gave all. Nobody is truly useless — even if Miwa self-deprecatingly jokes about being useless, she still was the one thing standing between Maki and Malevolent Shrine’s eviscerating hellscape. Even Amai’s sweets-conjuring joke technique saved Hana from a would-be fatal fall and helped to supply sugar to the brains of people using reverse cursed technique in Shoko’s triage. Larue couldn’t do much, but they caught Sukuna’s eye at the perfect time for Yuji to land a Black Flash, and that means something. It all means something.

Given how deeply GeGe clearly respects Hunter X Hunter, I want to end off by citing one of the quotes in Hunter X Hunter that has been the most impactful for me and I suspect has been about as impactful on GeGe: “It seems small things… infinitesimally small things… are needed to build the entire universe. The size of a thing has nothing to do with its power.” We always seem to direct our senses to the superlatives. The largest, the oldest, the loudest, the things that hit the hardest. But while it would be wrong to throw those out, we often lose sight of how many little, important things there are in the midst of those huge, important things.

Seeing someone’s smile when you remembered something they said that showed you were listening to them. The feeling of a warm breeze on a summer morning. The smell of honeysuckle on your walk home. Waking up to rain on a Sunday. The taste of watermelon. Getting married. Having your heart broken. Songs that make you smile, songs that make you cry — songs that do both, and songs that make you feel things you can’t describe. When you’re always looking to those immense, monolithic things, always comparing your seemingly small, seemingley meaningless life to them, you lose sight of just how meaningful all of it is.

Just because it doesn’t have cosmic, absolute meaning doesn’t make it meaningless. Every little thing that means something to you is worthy of being cherished. The people around you, the things that bring you happiness, even if that happiness is going to ebb and flow. It’s all worth fighting for and living for. It just takes bravery and conviction to keep fighting and keep living with authenticity and love. And if there’s an artistic value, a greater meaning to Shonen, now and always, it’s the unerring, unabashed belief that there’s a reason to aim high and not give up.

Because sometimes, life hurts. But if it’s just pain, Yuji Itadori will never stop. We’ll see what I have to amend, reconsider, or elaborate on when the fight is finished. I hope this gave some of you a new way to look at it.