#i'm merely heavily implying it then saying i'm not

[5iyoomi]

Thangyu NSFW Alphabet

Warnings: poly!thangyu x fem!reader, they're probably so ooc here I'm so sorry, not proofread I'm posting this at 4 am, mentions of drugs & alcohol, implied dubcon/under-negotiated kink in one part, somnophilia, just general smut stuff A/N: FINALLY POSTING AFTER 20 YEARS LMAO. If this sucks don't @ me the last time I wrote was idek how long ago now

nsfw under the cut

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

☆ If we’re being real here aftercare with them heavily depends on how they’re feeling…. But either way it’s pretty minimal, especially considering one of them practically falls asleep immediately (Thanos). Nam-gyu will make sure you’re all cleaned up and run you a bath if he feels like dealing with the mess right after. 

Thanos on the other hand takes it upon himself to cuddle up to you, long limbs entangled with yours as he presses a sloppy kiss to your cheek or forehead and murmurs sweet nothings you can’t make out half the time.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

☆ Both of them are tits men, it doesn’t matter if they’re big or small, they don’t give a shit. Even in a non-sexual manner, Thanos just likes to keep his hands under your shirt since he tends to run cold and it’s one of many excuses to be close to you. 

Nam-gyu isn’t as vocal about it but he doesn’t try to hide it. Whether it’s with an arm slung around your shoulder and his palm brushing your breasts, or full on touching you if he thinks another guy’s getting too close for comfort, you’ve gotten used to the constant feeling of hands on you.

On that note, Thanos’ favorite body part is his hands. He doesn’t necessarily get full on manicures, but he does take good care of them. He adores how big they are compared to yours and even Nam-gyu’s. The mere sight of his thick fingers wrapped around your smaller wrists never fails to make him dizzy.

If Nam-gyu had to choose, he’d say his hair. He likes when you tug at it while he eats you out because then he knows he’s doing something right. He gets greedy with it, guiding you to run your fingers through his hair just for the hell of it sometimes, or (not so) begrudgingly saying yes when you ask to braid it or put it in a ponytail.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

☆ Both of these freaks like to cum inside you and watch it spill out of you but especially Nam-gyu. There’s something about marking his territory that gets the raven-haired man off, because only he and Thanos get to fill you up to their heart's content. 

If there’s time for a quickie he’ll go about his day with a smug look on his face knowing you’re walking around dripping his and Thanos’ seed into your underwear. That if anyone were to flirt with you you’d be reminded that no one satisfies you like they do.

Thanos likes how it glistens on you after you blow him and let him cum on your face, using his thumb to further smear it on your skin until you’re whining in protest. It’s his way of staking his claim, in a way.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

☆ Thanos likes to make you come at least twice in your panties that way he has something to jerk himself off with when he knows you won’t be around for a while. He’ll inhale the scent of you with a tight fist around his cock, thinking about how cute you looked with his fingers pressing down on your puffy clit.

As much of a dominant streak as Nam-gyu has it’s almost laughably easy to flip the roles on him. Almost. You have to catch him when he has his guard down, which is usually right after you have sex or when he’s too high to realize what you’re trying to do. 

He doesn’t let it happen very often, and he won’t admit how much he likes it, but having you ride and praise/degrade him while Thanos watches is a guilty pleasure of his.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

☆ We all know both of them were up to some freaky shit in club pentagon like c’mon… And they can both be assholes but they’re hot and they know it, they 100% know how to please a girl. 

They aren’t the most experienced in serious relationships and romantic stuff, but they’ve had random hook-ups and one night stands before. You’re in good hands, literally and metaphorically.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

☆ If they’re in the mood to use you like a ragdoll, they’ll put you in doggy style with your hands tied behind your back so one of them can fuck you into the mattress while the other uses your throat. 

Otherwise their favorite is missionary. Not only can they watch every expression you pull while you’re blissed out and the way they sink into your warm heat with every thrust, but it’s easier to manhandle you like that, pushing your thighs up to your chest or pulling you into a needy kiss.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

☆ They’re more talkative and energetic when they’re high but I can’t see either of them cracking that many jokes during it in general. There might be a few here and there with both of them chuckling to each other, but they’re mostly serious.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

☆ I think it’d be absolutely hilarious if Thanos dyed his pubes purple but for the sake of discussion the carpet technically matches the drapes, it’s all natural color down there baby. He trims but still has a nice little happy trail that starts at his navel and leads down to his dick (he’s sensitive there, too. Do with that information what you will.)

Nam-gyu is more well groomed but he doesn’t care to fully shave, it’s less of a hassle that way.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

☆ They fuck you like they hate you but their actions give away how much they truly love you. Nam-gyu will tuck strands of hair behind your ear to keep it out of your face and trace comforting circles against your ankles while he has you bent over. 

A more sober, softer Thanos makes sure you’re okay when they’re being particularly rough. Either way, neither of them like being too far away from you for too long anyways, and you know they mean it when they say ‘I love you’ because they aren’t doing it just to say it.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

☆ 90% of the time they don’t see the point because they have you, so what’s the point when they have a girlfriend that’s just as willing? On the rare occasion you’re not an option and they can’t get to each other they’ll scroll through the pictures and videos they’ve got of you and make it work.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

☆ This goes back to the hand thing but Thanos likes choking. He never puts too much pressure on you, his grip loose enough that you can usually push him off if you want or need to, but the power trip makes him impossibly harder. 

The veins in his hands bulge where they’re wrapped around your neck, and the slight sting of pain from your nails leaving moon-shaped indents on his forearms? He’s a goner.

Nam-gyu has a huge thing for somnophilia. It probably happens one night when he can’t sleep; he’s too lazy to get himself off but turned on enough that he can’t get back to sleep. 

Thanos is a deep sleeper, and he’s about to try to wake you up when he sees how peaceful you look: the soft rise and fall of your chest, lashes fluttering and the strap of your shirt falling off one of your shoulders. 

You groggily wake up to him pressed up behind your back, your panties pulled to the side as he uses your slick to slide his cock between your thighs.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

☆ Literally anywhere inside of your shared apartment but they’ll never do it in any public setting hands down. Both of them are possessive and jealous, they wouldn’t even risk someone else being able to see you at your most vulnerable. Screw the neighbors that have to listen to you scream every night.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

☆ Just you, really. You dressing up pretty in lingerie does wonders too, but they aren’t picky when it comes to you and they definitely don’t need anything special. Pray that YOU can keep up with THEIR libido, actually.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

☆ Seriously hurting you is a no-no. They’re up to trying anything once if you or either of them wanna try something new to spice it up in the bedroom, but there’s a certain line they won’t cross. 

If they choke or slap you in any way it’s because you asked for it, and they’ll make up some sort of safe word or action like tapping them three times if you need them to stop/slow down.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

☆ Service doms? Nah, they eat you out for their pleasure. They don’t care if you’re shaking and pushing them away from you because you’ve lost count of how much you’ve come, these two get drunk on the taste of your pussy. 

They both have long fingers that curl just right to hit your sweet spot dead on, and Thanos’ are thicker, too. That paired with their rings and they’ll have you crying for them. Don’t get them wrong, they won’t argue if you get on your knees and pull on the waistband of their pants instead.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

☆ They do both! They can fuck you so hard and fast you’re seeing stars afterwards or they can take their time with you, pouring all their desperation and want into making love to you. They’ll never call it that, though, but you know they’re secretly saps.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

☆ They’re always down. There will genuinely not be a time you ask them, even if you have to be somewhere within the next 5 minutes, that they say no. They might not happen often but if a quick session can sate all of you for long enough then running a little late is more than worth it.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

☆ Back to them being disgustingly possessive they aren’t big risk takers in the sense of doing it anywhere semi-public or straight up public, but they’ll always experiment. In their mind, if they already know your body like the back of their own hands, why not play around with things that’ll enhance the experience? 

They start out simple with handcuffs, and if you’re up for it they might introduce toys too. They don’t mind stuff like anal either.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

☆ They could go all night if they wanted to, but Thanos doesn’t last very long with the amount of stimulation unless he’s purposefully trying to edge you or himself. Nam-gyu has a bit more stamina being younger than him, so if Thanos gets tired he’ll keep himself busy pleasuring you while Nam-gyu uses your cunt.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

☆ Not many, they have handcuffs and rope that they’ll use to restrain you sometimes. They have a paddle that they’ll break out to use on you if they’re feeling mean, but not crazy often.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

☆ Nam-gyu is the fucking KING of teasing you oh my god. He’ll finger you and ignore your clit for hours, stopping when you clench around him because he knows you’re close. 

He’ll hold your hips down so you can’t grind against him while you’re sitting on his lap and making out, signaling Thanos to run his hands up and down your sides and pressing feather-light kisses to the nape of your neck but nothing more.

Thanos likes to tease you from time to time, but usually it’s more torture for him to hold back from sliding into you than it is for you to feel him slipping the tip just past your tight walls before pulling back out.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

☆ In general neither of them are exactly loud, but they’re not quiet either. They’ll grunt and pant in your ear, deep, guttural moans that send shivers up your spine.

If you’re topping Nam-gyu (or Thanos) he’s more loud, but he’ll try to bite down on his tongue or bottom lip to contain his whines and whimpers. You’ll have to force a thumb between his teeth if you wanna hear him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

☆ They’ll occasionally smoke weed or drink before they fuck you because it’s a different kind of high from their usual drugs, and they won’t force you to do it but if you do wanna try they like to shotgun the smoke directly into your mouth and then kiss you. 

It usually starts with Nam-gyu teasing you about your apprehension, then being surprised when you climb onto his lap and ask for a hit. He’ll give Thanos that look, then pull you in by your chin and tell you to open. 

The simple but direct command has you clenching your thighs together, which doesn’t go unnoticed by either man.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

☆ Thanos is about average but he’s thick and veiny (and he’d be uncircumcised hear me out). His dick also curves slightly to the right. That’s ALL I’m saying about him otherwise I won’t shut up. Second more in-depth post later maybe.

Nam-gyu’s isn’t as thick but he’s longer than Thanos, reaching into the deepest parts of you and stretching you out with ease.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

☆ Let’s just say high. They’re both already always horny separately, but together you’ll be lucky to get any sleep.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

☆ Light sleeper Nam-gyu 🤝 Deep sleeper Thanos. Very much self explanatory but Thanos will be out like a light within minutes, meanwhile Nam-gyu likes to wait until you’re both asleep to really get comfortable anyway <3

[starlit-mansion]

Read the medium review about the hotel hell show and. To be fully honest. I really can't tell if it's "worse" than the dross level stuff i watched on adult swim in the aights/early teens. Like stuff like vbros or moral orel were genuinely artful, but it would be squeezing blood from a stone to criticize the character arcs on other shows that were mostly just splashy, violent, vulgar and sexual-in-a-regressive-way.

Which is. Not to defend the show or anything. There's clearly criticism-worthy elements in the way it portrays sex, queerness, abuse and black and jewish coded characters (based on the review) even within the scope of "this is a vulgar taboo comedy." But also the observation of 'what if people treated my gym partner is a monkey with the zeal and aggression they have for steven universe' is haunting me lmao.

[untoldstar]

male yandere psychologist x fem patient reader [introduction]

warnings: heavily implied that the reader is a patient at a psych ward, obsessive behaviors and tendencies, abuse of power, toxic environment, yandere themes, might not show in this part but for the future Ivan takes advantage of the readers vulnerable mental state.

There aren’t intense scenes in this at all (as I see it) BUT as for the coming parts of this OC it still has to do with a character who struggles with mental illness, an extremely toxic psychologist who abuses his position and being in a psyche ward so if you feel like any of that sounds triggering or there’s a possibility it could be triggering I would urge you not to read this or other parts of this OC.

pls be careful what you read guys and stay safe mwah🫶

Tick..

Tick..

Tick..

Ivan taps his foot impatiently and pushes up his sleeve for the millionth time to reveal his wristwatch.

2:59 PM

Just a few more seconds..

Tick..

3:00 PM

Ivan smiles, his stiff body finally relaxing and just like everyday a knock is heard on his office door and in walks the nurse pushing you forward like a criminal into his office. He only spares the nurse and nod and a polite smile before his attention is directed at you, focusing on your every move anticipating what you’ll do next. You huff and plop down in the chair in front of his desk rolling your eyes "Ah [name], how are we doing today?" he clasps his hands Infront of him and stares at you expectantly.

Just like everyday.

‘Why does he ask the same question every day? What could possibly change in the matter of a single day? They should've made these cheek-up's weekly instead. This is becoming such a pain.’

"Fine. Just like always." you answer curtly. He hums nodding "Well, I’m afraid I’m going to have to cut to the chase today there’s something I must discuss with you.” You quirk a brow. You have to admit seeing the serious expression instead of the easy going one he usually has is a bit unnerving “I'm sure you already know that your..leave is to be expected soon." his lips twist in displeasure as if merely saying that has left a bitter taste in his mouth. You nod "Yes..what about that?" he sighs "Well, I'm afraid I've come to the decision that you'll have to stay a while longer, just to be safe." Your heart plummets. Sure you haven't been kissing Dr.Ivan's ass or being necessarily..nice to him but that shouldn’t have anything to do with your treatment. You know you've been getting better so what possible reason could have you stay here "Just to be safe? What is that supposed to mean?" you shoot daggers at him but he doesn't seem the least bit bothered by it "We’ve witnessed many patients show signs of improvement and seem like they’re ready to leave but there were also many instances where patients leave our facility and end up..falling into old patterns. Not that I expect that from you but I would like to guarantee your safety." You swallow the lump in your throat. Can they even do that? Is that even legal? "..How long?" a few beats of silence passes by while he blankly stares at you before answering "A month." Your shoulders drop down exasperatedly. Another month??

You feel frustration bubble up inside your chest. You feel hopeless as if you’re never getting out of here. You can’t take it you can’t take seeing the same hallways the same people this same fucking office everyday.

You don't say anything when you get up from your chair and start charging for the door "Our daily check up isn't quite done, my dear." His voice booms behind you "I don't fucking care." You spit back and go to reach for the door when his hands suddenly slam the door on either side of you, trapping you against it "Why are you always trying to leave me?" he whispers his shaky breath fanning against the side of your neck "..What are you talking about..Doc-" his hand clenches into a fist "Don't call me that!" You flinch trembling slightly "..I'm sorry I raised my voice, but I've told you countless times before you don't have to call me 'Doctor' my dear. Ivan is fine." You stay quite and he sighs "You won't even say my name.." he leans his head on your shoulder his body slumping almost exhausted from the interaction.

You hold your breath eyeing the door handle inches away from you "Why do you hate me so much?" his voice almost breaks "You roll your eyes at me, you barely say a few words in our daily sessions, You can't stand it when I go to visit you in your room.." he steps closer, his body now flush against your back "You throw a fit and almost walk out on me.." he moves his head to the side sniffing your hair and you hear him let out a groan “God I thought you’d be happy about staying here. All I want is for you to love me. Why won’t you love me? hm?” his arms slide down for the door to wrap around you squeezing tightly “Am I just the annoying psychologist your forced to talk to? Is that all I am to you?” he keeps talking almost in his own world too intoxicated by you, having you in his arms body flush against his your scent enveloping him “Damnit why won’t you-“ you take advantage of his vulnerability and decide to make a run for it, using the door to push back all of your body weight to at least have his arms off of you immediately taking a hold of the door handle and leaping out of his office, you run down the hall never looking back. You’re surprised he didn’t pull you back in maybe he was shocked maybe he wasn’t and he just..let you go. Whatever the case was you had to get as far away from him as possible.

Ivan’s left alone in his office panting, cheeks flushed and an obvious tent in his pants. He lets out a low chuckle looking far off into the hallway ‘Soon..instead of running away from me you’ll be running to me. I’ll make sure of it darling.’

[akaakeis]

home. -- sakusa k.

synopsis : sakusa kiyoomi and yn have been dating for some time now, with kiyoomi dedicating time to his volleyball team and yn dedicating time to their education. in their final year of university, however, they need to travel for a semester to fulfill a credit requirement for their degree. finally, they come back home.

wc : 1661 .ᐟ

gn!reader x sakusa kiyoomi (2nd person)

notes//cw : i'm kinda following the american school system for this since i'm not familiar with any other school system!! (like the months that school runs, when semesters end, that type of thing),, this is msby sakusa so it's like... 2019,, reader is a university student,, reader is implied to be living with sakusa (but this isn't explicitly stated),, kinda sad in the beginning,, fluffy ending,, HEAVILY projecting onto yn with any parts describing how she feels oops,, NOT proofread again,, i was inspired to write this when i heard 'coming home' by beabadoobee!!

January 6th, 2019.

you sit on your bed and open your laptop with a sigh, reading through your class schedule for this upcoming semester. this is your final semester, ever, and it's finally starting to sink in as you read through your schedule. to fulfill a requirement for your degree, you'll have to travel this semester to take your classes. the classes were, unfortunately, unavailable at your own university. you knew you would have to at some point, but it's just awful that you'll have to be away for so long. a quiet thump can be heard as you close your laptop and put it to the side.

rustling can be heard outside of the bedroom as sakusa comes in with a package that was, presumably, just delivered to the front door.

"hey, what's wrong?" he asks immediately, eyes scanning over your face with a slight frown. he can tell from your expression that you're stressed about something.

"mm.. nothing, come sit down, omi. i gotta tell you something." you say, your voice soft and slightly sad. he obliges you, putting down the package on the dresser and sitting next to you on the bed. he looks at you attentively.

you take a deep breath and start to explain the situation. "...so, for this semester, i'll be traveling for my classes. i'll be staying a couple hours away."

sakusa's breath hitches for a moment before he lets out a quiet sigh. "that's okay, you'll do amazing. i'm sure of it, yn." he says, his voice resembling something of reassurance, though he seems a bit upset himself.

you offer him a slight smile, gingerly taking his hand into yours. "it'll be okay. i'll be back in may," you say softly, running your thumb over the back of his hand.

he nods slightly, giving you a slight smile back. he gives your hand a quick squeeze. "yeah. when do you leave?"

"in a week," you reply.

who knew that week would go by in the blink of an eye? it had felt like a mere hour.

January 13th, 2019.

the two of you sit in the car, him in the driver's seat and you in the passenger seat. you quietly squeeze his free hand, keeping your eyes on the road. he was driving you to your new dorm.

it was a two hour long car ride, which both of you spent in silence. you were both enjoying each other's presence while you still could.

the car gradually comes to a stop in front of your new dorm. it's a huge building, and there are numerous people outside, hauling things inside. you assume they're all moving in for the semester as well.

"come on, i'll help you bring in your stuff," sakusa says softly, lightly nudging you.

it takes about an hour, but you and sakusa managed to bring in all of your things and set up all the essential things. you're both seated on your dorm's bed now, not wanting the moment end, for him to go back home. you lean against his shoulder, holding onto his hand.

"i'm really gonna miss you," you whisper.

"i'll miss you too," he says back softly, gently running his thumb over the back of your hand. "it'll be okay. we can call and text whenever."

before either of you realize it, it's already 10:00 at night, and sakusa needs to go home. he has practice tomorrow, after all. with that, the night draws to a close, and the bed feels empty. you're homesick already.

January 14th, 2019.

it's your first day back to school, and unfortunately you have a morning class... at 7:00 am. aside from the fact that you suffered while trying to get up early enough to prepare yourself for the day, the class went smoothly.

everything felt like routine throughout the day as you went from class to class, listening to the lectures and taking notes. this continued until you headed back to your dorm, kicking off your shoes and dropping onto your bed. you had to forcibly stop yourself from getting up to go look for kiyoomi, because you knew he wasn't there. oh, how awful it is to be homesick.

the days seemed to drawl on and blur together as you went to day after day of classes. you managed to text sakusa every once in a while, but he always seemed to be a little busy. since he seemed busy, you obviously didn't want to bother him, so you stopped frequently messaging him.

the homesick feeling never went away. you felt as if you would do anything just to be with him. you felt so far away in your dorm.

March 20, 2019.

it took a while, but you finally felt less homesick. today was sakusa's birthday, and you had something planned. you had coordinated a plan with the rest of sakusa's team to get them to have a celebratory dinner in the city, so that you could surprise him and wish him a happy birthday in person.

the day took an agonizingly long time to pass by, but you eventually made it through all of your classes for the day, heading straight home to prepare for the dinner.

you get dressed nicely for the birthday dinner, wearing semi-formal attire and nice shoes. it's a really short walk from your dorm, so you arrive there quickly. to your surprise, however, the entire volleyball team is already there, including kiyoomi. you immediately rush over to him, hugging him from behind.

he's startled by the sudden hug, but realizes it's you, putting his hand on top of yours. 

"happy birthday, omi. i'm so happy that i'm able to celebrate with you." you say softly, just loud enough for him to hear. the entire team, but particularly atsumu, watches smugly as they see sakusa's face soften over you.

dinner passes by in a blur, but then suddenly, one of the waitresses bring out a slice of cake, placing it in front of sakusa. there's a lit candle on top. everyone present at the table sings happy birthday to sakusa, cheering as he blows out the candle. it's clear that he's extremely happy about all the gestures that have been done for him, despite his more stoic demeanor. those who are familiar with him can tell he's happy.

"thank you, yn. i'm so happy to see you in person... i miss you," he says quietly, gently squeezing your hand.

"of course, omi... i wouldn't miss celebrating your birthday for the world. i miss you too," you say back, offering him a soft smile.

with long, drawn out goodbyes from everyone on the team, the night came to a close. the team drove back home, and you went back to your dorm, knocking out. it felt comforting to see kiyoomi again. it had been a while. in about two months, you would finally be able to say, "i'm home."

May 28, 2019.

today was the day. you could finally go back home. you'd be lying if you said you were more thrilled about the fact that you're finally getting your degree than the fact that you're finally able to go home and see kiyoomi. you packed up everything in your dorm as quickly as possible, heading for the train home. 

the ride home seemed to go by faster than usual, passing by in what felt like 20 minutes.

you walk home quickly, eager to see kiyoomi. once you get to the front door, you quietly unlock it. you open the door slowly to prevent it from squeaking, and you leave your luggage outside so that he doesn't hear the sound of it rolling around as you enter the house. as you close the front door, a quiet click is heard, which you silently curse at yourself for.

you can hear the sound of running water in the kitchen, along with the sound of a plastic bag being rustled around. you peek into the kitchen, trying to see what kiyoomi is doing. he's, apparently, cleaning the kitchen. he's taken the plastic bag out of the trash can and replaced it with a new one. the full trash bag sits on the floor, waiting to be taken out. by the kitchen sink, you can see kiyoomi peacefully washing the dishes. you let out a soft sigh, coming up behind him quietly, peeking out from his side to see what he's washing.

"i'm home," you say softly, causing kiyoomi to turn around, startled by the sudden voice behind him. his face immediately softens upon seeing you. he grabs the dish towel, quickly wiping his hands dry. 

he engulfs you in a hug, his arms snaking around your waist to hold you close. "welcome back," he says quietly, burying his face in your hair.

"let me help you," you say, lifting your head to look up at him, loosening the hug. you let go of him, grabbing the bag of trash that had been sitting on the floor. "i'll take this out, and i'll be back to help wash the dishes."

he smiles slightly, nodding as he watched you walk out with the bag of trash in hand. you step foot out of the house, tossing the bag into the trash bin and heading back inside. you head back to the kitchen, lightly nudging him to the side of the sink so that you can help him wash the dishes. 

the two of you clean up the kitchen in silence, just enjoying each other's presence yet again. once all of the night's chores are done, however, the two of you head to bed almost immediately. kiyoomi holds you close to him, keeping his face in your hair and muttering, "i missed you a lot. glad you're home."

you feel your heart sputter at his words, and you smile slightly, bringing up a hand to play with his hair. "me too. good thing i didn't get home late."

notes :

₊ ⊹ we're all gonna collectively ignore the photos i used because i don't have the energy to actually make it look good... thanks !!

₊ ⊹  yeah i have no idea how university works in case that wasn't made painfully clear at the beginning sorry </3

₊ ⊹ just pretend it makes sense i guess, cause i was NOT about to research how to make that part of the fic make sense 😋

₊ ⊹ not proofread as per usual (are we surprised atp)... please lmk if you find an error though !!

₊ ⊹ after not releasing anything for like a week cause of like everything in my life deciding to gang up on me... WE ARE SO BACK 🗣️‼️ (lie)

₊ ⊹ i randomly got this idea when i was listening to all the songs on bea's new album... honestly i have ideas that i got from a bunch of the songs so stay tuned!! i'll probably write some more oneshots based off her new songs

₊ ⊹ my motivation peaked and then fell within like an hour but i pulled through to get this done😭

₊ ⊹ any other works can be found on my masterlist! (it's pretty small at the moment since i just started though!!)

----------------

🏷️ : @iiwaijime + @bokukos <3

[lu-is-not-ok]

Something I just realized is that both Hong Lu and Jia Xichun share Rupture as a part of their kits, but they also both have a secondary element. For Hong Lu it’s Sinking but for Xichun it’s Poise. Feels unique but weird. Thoughts?

See, I've been thinking about status effects in a more general sense as to what they represent more literally. I feel like there's a bit of a difference between Xichun having Rupture+Poise and Hong Lu having Rupture+Sinking, mainly because of what I think those statuses might represent.

Rupture, the status effect both share, is a representation of "true damage". Either damage done to precise weak points, as implied by Seven or Cinq, or damage done with enough power to break through defenses, such as Devyat.

For both Xichun and Hong Lu, I believe it represents their physical prowess and techniques, likely trained into them by the Jia Family.

Poise is a status effect that I believe quite literally represents moving gracefully and with intent. A building up of physical momentum or focus to deal more powerful strikes. Getting into the rhythm of the fight so to say.

This fits Xichun very well as we see she fights with fans, in an almost dance-like fashion. A combat style that would likely focus heavily on moving with intent and keeping up proper focus and momentum.

And while a lot of Hong Lu's IDs move in a graceful dance-like manner as well, they're usually not movements done for the sake of strengthening attacks, but merely for their performance. The only ID of his that does have Poise, Full-Stop, is shown to be explicitly moving with intent in his Uptie Story, weaving in and out to direct enemies into the line of sight of Heathcliff's sniper.

Sinking is an interesting status, as it represents mental, sanity damage. I'm guessing it could represent a lot of things. For the Butler and Dieci IDs, it could represent a sort of overpresent mental pressure. For Spicebush, it could represent the somewhat mind altering nature of the flowers. R Corp Ishmael literally deals damage directly to the psyche. There's a lot it could be, really.

...Which is why base Hong Lu having Sinking is so intriguing to me. Because there's only so much it could represent. Is it a representation of a sort of mental pressure he exerts due to something related to his status? Is he in some way actively taunting the enemy so that they lose resolve? Something else we don't yet know about?

There's also the implication of the juxtaposition of Rupture and Sinking next to each other. Rupture is a very physically-focused status effect, it reflects direct damage to the body. Sinking on the other hand is a very mentally-focused status effect, reflecting damage to the mind. Body and mind.

The very interesting part of this all is that this combination only exists in one other ID as of now - Sunshower Heathcliff. An ID that not only inflicts both Rupture and Sinking, but also gains Sinking as well, a reflection of how the E.G.O gear actively alters the user's mental state. The usage of both Rupture and Sinking here could represent how in Lobcorp terms, this gear could inflict either Black damage, or both Red and White damage. Basically both physical and mental.

So yeah. I think Hong Lu's status combo is much more intriguing than Xichun's, and I'm not sure if the reason for that is the same for both of them. It's a lot easier to explain Xichun's Rupture Poise than it is to explain Hong Lu's Rupture Sinking.

[tfem-confessions]

So I sent in this ask https://www.tumblr.com/tfem-confessions/772075570687279104/so-im-in-a-weird-place-im-an-intersex-transfem?source=share

A few days ago and I'm just confused why people are so upset at me for just... Being upset at the state of some of the transmasculine theory online and how it does a great disservice to both transmasculine people, intersex people, and other trans people. I don't know why not liking the idea that "Trans men are incapable of oppressing others on an axis that is outside of transness who are of a minority class they are not" gets people so aggressive and cruel in response. It's genuinely so sad to see so many trans men be forced to carry on with such bad internalized transphobia that they externalize it and hurt others. Like it also hurts them I'm worried about them too, genuinely.

I do understand your complaint, and what you said wasn't hateful or bad, but it could possibly come off as a little condescending, or dismissive.

(Assuming you actually want to know why people are upset, this is my interpretation, if this is just a vent please skip.)

Saying that 'this minority group's' work/theory is so liberating while 'this minority group''s' work/theory is poorly developed, hateful and (for all intents and purposes you did heavily imply it was 'whiny' 'fixated on validating suffering') which is an existing and extremely harmful stereotype of transmascs in general comes across as extremely dismissive and biased.

To put it into perspective, it may come across the same way that a transmasc saying 'transfeminine theory is so poorly developed and is just focused on blaming everyone else for their problems', which would play on the transfems are aggressive stereotype and come across as extrmely dismissive and biased.

Your current ask doesn't come across as much better as you are dismissing their concerns by saying they are upset with you disagreeing to a stupid statement ("Trans men are incapable of oppressing others on an axis that is outside of transness who are of a minority class they are not")

When that is very much not the problem. Few people disagree with that. You said transmasculine theory on tumblr as a whole was whiny hateful and did nothing for the transmascs who very clearly do seem to get the same liberation and happiness from it as you do from transfeminine theory. And you are framing their grievances with your comment as mere hate caused by internalised transphobia (again playing on existing stereotypes of transmascs being insecure, illogical and obsessed with their feelings.

This all would most likely promote an angry response and i do think its important to a) Not frame transmasculine theory or transfeminine theory as inherently worse than the other but rather work together to come to a cohesive and fair overall understanding. and also b) To do the work to unlearn possible stereotypes which may affect the way you think, and do your best to consider your words to make sure they aren't drawing on an existing and harmful stereotype of either transfems aggressive/violent/dangerous or transmascs insecure/stupid/emotional

(Explanation over)

I'm sorry you received aggression (all I saw were 3 comments and you were anon so I'm not sure how hate reached you and therefore I don't know how to stop it) and i hope you feel better soon!

I can understand feeling frustrated by transmasculine theory if it is dismissive of your own lived reality and I hope you continue to thrive and feel happy in your chosen beliefs. I'm sorry you know so many hurtful transmascs, that has not been my experience, so I would suggest you try and make some more transmasc friends or mootsas they are on the whole generally very healthy and well rounded individuals just as transfems are.

Bye darling and I hope you have a wonderful life of peace and prosperity! If you feel the need to come here again, feel free to make an icon! (you don't have to though, it just makes it easier to keep track)

[gynandromorph]

Hey! Question about Idletry. Even with the most bare bones critical analysis of fiction, as a socially isolated, lonely, heavily theripized lesbian, its hard not to idolize Jessies, even more vile actions. Or even see a bit, if not a lot of myself in her actions. Do you get this often? I know with the political climate, isolation is gonna get even worse for folks.

do i get this often as in do i get people who relate to her and idolize her? not frequently, but not unheard of. most people do not find jessie relatable and if they did i don't think she would be an accurately written outcast.

do i see myself in her often? she has a lot of feelings i used to have. i think i'm just tired now. people are pathetic, selfish animals, and i cannot blame them for my social suffering in the same way i can't blame my dog for eating something off of the counter when i left her alone with it. sometimes a particularly unsavory, visceral hatred will boil up in me towards, ironically, other lesbians, for having what i've been deprived of by nothing more than luck. i didn't stay in one home for my entire life, so i never really formed strong attachments to friends like jessie did. it is really the people you expect to care about you that don't, though -- in her case, friends she had, in my case, community i am inherently a part of. you can see the threads cross briefly to reach a similar endpoint here

i can't feel that hatred without knowing that there are people out there with an equally justified hatred for me as well, because i have at least gotten to be in a relationship before. at least i haven't ALWAYS been alone. that cognitive dissonance interests me, but also neatly puts a bow on the irrationality of the thought. for jessie, even after she does have a romantic partner, i think she'd take offense to the notion, because it isn't really about the unfairness as much as punishment for causing her perceived pain. and i think that's where we differ so drastically that i don't often relate to what she's saying even though i objectively know what the feelings she's having are like. i don't really care to punish people for hurting me because it won't undo the pain. we can see throughout the story that jessie remains unhappy no matter what she does and who she punishes because it doesn't *undo* the pain and isolation. it still hurts that it happened and it doesn't bring her closer to anyone else (or them closer to her). i also just have a much stronger empathy and people pleasing response. that anger just becomes nothing to me once i have to actually interact with someone and i generally have to look away from even fictional pain because it is so distressing to me. i would hate to imply that jessie is like simply due to an empathy or lack thereof; we see that she has much more empathy as a child and does care about fairness and hurting other people's feelings. she has practiced non-empathy mentally for an extended length of time with very little actual interaction to erode that. the actual biggest difference between her and myself is probably merely her lack of a fractured personality that can rebel against her if she steps too far out of line. and a massive skill issue.

[extremely-judgemental]

This is the last time I talk about Elain (hopefully!). I honestly don’t understand where you’re getting the idea that she is sweet. Elain is polite, like ‘my neighbour is nice to me’ sort of way. That doesn’t warrant how everyone puts her on a pedestal.

Her actions are mostly glossed over as self-preservation, but that doesn’t seem right to describe her behaviour either. At least, not in a sympathetic way. I'm sure there’s going to be an overload of trauma to justify this, because how can SJM’s heroines have mere mediocre problems when they can be abused or have lost a loved one?

I digress. Ever since Nesta’s grooming came to light, the same is assumed about Elain—that she’s groomed to be ‘nice’. That’s not entirely true. Their mother and grandmother focus on Nesta because getting the eldest married well will bring more prospects for the other two. In their mother’s words, Elain needn’t worry because she is a born beauty, and so she is not trained in courtliness or politics. And, Feyre has enough liberty to lock herself in their father’s office. As a middle child, Elain chooses the ‘nice’ mask because it’s what gets her attention in a family full of stubborn heads—her mother, her grandmother, her sisters.

During their poverty years, even if she could do chores, it’s hard to believe Nesta let her given how much she coddles Elain. And, Feyre treats her like a fragile doll. Elain essentially enjoys the best of both worlds like her father without contributing much to the family. She benefits heavily from her sisters’ animosity against each other—she’s the kind one while the other is the bitch. She’s also quick to secure a marriage alliance right after they regain their wealth. This isn’t to say it wasn’t out of love, but the plot is set in somewhat medieval times, where the order in which the sisters marry is crucial—Elain already wed before the eldest leaves a mark on Nesta’s reputation, making it difficult for her to find suitors.

Elain goes her entire life without being blamed or hated by her family, or even the IC. To have gone through all those struggles, having done literally nothing, and still cherished by everyone? Kindness doesn’t buy you that kind of a pass. It’s not her fault that everyone puts her first, but it’s the result of the image she actively cultivates to achieve her means.

This is why the paintbrushes don’t hold much value either. She doesn’t make Feyre’s life easier or take away some of the burdens, but gives her presents and everything is okay between them? This comes off like love-bombing to me—making Feyre feel special so that Elain isn’t the villain. Which worked, as Nesta is the one called ungrateful. When you’re struggling and someone offers you a bit of joy and relief, it is impactful, and Elain’s gesture could have been that if she had contributed to the family. But now, it comes off as manipulation.

And here’s my issue with her betrayal in Silver Flames. No one gives two fucks about what she thinks is best for Nesta. The IC won’t sit around and wait till she’s convinced. If she decides to lock herself in her room and cry again, only Feyre might care a little. Until then, she’s never included in any major decisions and she’s too perceptive to not notice this. She doesn’t even have to side with Nesta, but to pack her things to send her away?

She even goes on to throw in a ‘you don’t have to be miserable’ when Nesta is being imprisoned with a man. Imagine Elain trapped with Lucien to get her out of her funk. Feyre violated Lucien’s mind when he asked for a few minutes alone with her. They were chaperoned by the entire family for one simple tea. Clearly, Elain is not so stupid as to not know what she’s implying. She lets Nesta suffer not out of self-preservation but because she, like Feyre, believes Nesta is hopeless.

Later, she manipulates Nesta into scrying and insults her in front of everyone who hates her. She blames her ‘invisibility’—she crafted for herself—on others. It isn’t about her owning her life, because she could have done the scrying right away without that conversation with Nesta. And it’s not about protecting herself from the IC. Her outburst felt more like her resentment, that she couldn’t handle losing her shield.

There are many who want Elain to stand up to the IC, but the thing is, she has no reason to. When none of her actions are held against her, what would she fight for? The IC’s behaviour is borderline psychotic with Nesta to prove she wouldn’t be welcomed into the family unless she becomes reputable enough to be Feyre’s sister and Cassian’s mate. In Elain’s case, she is already forgiven and accepted.

Though it still falls under the broad term, her self-preservation carries heavy undertones of selfishness and manipulation. It is not even a survival response triggered under pressure. Most of her life, Elain never has to make big choices. She always gets what she wants without lifting a finger. No responsibility at home, more attention from family, the only one to receive her father’s love, her engagement to Graysen, going to Graysen for help, being left alone during the battles, having her own gardens in Velaris, learning to cook, leading a simple life, to be away from Lucien, pursuing Azriel. When exactly is she ever denied in the first place to preserve her happiness?

Also, Elain is definitely not a helpless doe. She is an opportunist. Her ‘kindness’ is a mask to escape scrutiny from others when she neglects her responsibilities. It serves her too since ‘Elain is Elain’.

And that’s fine because these flaws add layers to her character and there’s room for growth. But when the narrative ignores them and paints her as an angel because it supports the glorified hero, that is wrong. We see it happen with Feyre, Rhysand, and the Inner Circle. Elain is underdeveloped, yet she shows prominent traits at major plot points and still is considered ‘sweet’. At this rate, she’s just going to be another bland cutout who can never do anything wrong and is universally loved (like Feyre).

On the other hand, all this masking, the cunning, and the pettiness are great agents for her obvious future bonding with Rhysand who is quite similar. But her true nature has to be acknowledged first, which is clearly not happening in the narrative or the fandom.

There are obvious issues to be resolved in Elain’s character—shedding these traits and loving others without exploitation—but the focus will be on what SJM deems worthy for her plot. Elain went from being content to staying in the background, tending to her gardens, and creating beauty to wanting to step out of her sisters’ shadows. Though she never gave that vibe, it will be shoved down our throats because these leads need to be badasses. At this point, she has more chances of turning into another Feyre with her ‘coming out of the shell’ journey because that’s the only way women can grow in this series. I don’t like Elain the way I don’t like Feyre, Rhysand, or Cassian. She is, and will likely never be, held accountable for anything she does. Nesta has self-awareness, her flaws are portrayed as such, and she makes amends for her mistakes because that allows Feyre to be right again. But what reason does Elain have to be better when she hasn’t done anything wrong until now?

[solarcanic]

I'm so normal about Maxie. He's so complex and the general fandom never reads his ORAS dialogue enough to understand that.

He's distant and formal, yet somewhat sensitive and dramatic (as seen in the Seafloor Cavern). He's rash and stubborn, but has a strict moral code and follows it heavily, meaning the best for humanity (just corrupted by the mentioned stubbornness). He can be read as a perfectionist, and likely relies on routine to feel stable (the morning meeting). He cares about others but tends to be impulsive (In Pokemas it's more evident, he has dialogue where he says he tends to ramble, and in the delta episode he apologizes for not thinking of Courtney first, so he is likely not only impulsive but by the time Groudon's settled, he's aware of it). I personally read that he has HIGH compassion but struggles with empathy (actually reading people's emotions) because of the scene in pokemas where he's like "And I know his feelings are real." About Archie...

I read that scene as implying part of why Maxie continues the rivalry, is not only for his own ideals, but because he assumes it's best for the both of them. He doesn't hate Archie, to me; he wants to improve the world for people, I don't think he'd exclude Archie from it over some personal quarrel (and the symbolism of the model boat). He still wants Archie to thrive and grow, just not. Biblical flood. But, given his rigid morality, he can seem like he hates Archie with the harshness, when he merely hates Archie's ideals.

He can also be overconfident, yet seems insecure in a way to me(?)

I might be biased, but his harsh view toward himself after breaking his own moral code (scene after you catch Groudon) strikes me. I think he's very turbulent in his view of himself and/or others (perfectionism too). He does something right and his mind displays overconfidence, but crashes into near self-loathing upon mishaps, as well.

And the general, non-pokevillian specific fandom just. Doesn't notice. The TrueGreen7 poll for the villains where Maxie and Archie were last fucked me up because DOES NOBODY READ THE DIALOGUE?? DID NO ONE PLAY ORAS??? DOES NOBODY SEE WHAT I SEE???? IN THIS MAN???? Give him a chance. He's not a "simple character" YOU JUST. DIDN'T. LOOK.

[amruwa]

i'm sorry, but please wait for me.

dan heng x gn!reader.

summary: he loves you, but he feared that his memories would hurt you. as uncertainties swirled in his being, he looks into your hopeful gaze for the last time.

cw: angst, implied lovers, kissing, spoilers/lore-based, purposefully written in lowercase, not proofread, possibly ooc, written before 1.2 update, lmk if i missed anything else!

for years, danheng was afraid. terrified for his being, as he'd fear that his own past would reach him. he'd longed for peace, trying to vanish from the shackles of his homeplace's memories.

he had tried escaping his own reality, searching for a place that he could call home. as he wandered, danheng had finally found a crew that was willing to take him in, called the astral express. even so, the express had done little to ease his conflicting mind.

though his mind was disordered, you were there. as if your mere presence could dissipate his conflicted being, washing all away his uncertainties. but, he was afraid. he was afraid of his own past catching up to him, fearing that it would even hurt you.

as each day passes by, his love only grew for you, seemingly as if he found new reasons to love you. your sweetest smile and warmest embrace was enough to calm the raging storm inside his heart.

but, he didn't want to hurt you. not when he'd awoke to nightmares every night, seemingly as if it haunted him. cold sweat clings onto his skin, cascading his features as he pants heavily from the aftermath. images of his memories flashing through his nightmares, it only made him afraid.

he didn't want to lose you. not when his own power overwhelms him, causing him to be haunted of his own past everytime.

as he caught wind of the stellaron hunters' mission in xianzhou luofu, his heart sank. he had ran away, avoiding his homeplace. he felt so conflicted.

but, he knew that it'd be best, if he went on that mission in xianzhou luofu. he'd take any chance he could get, if it only meant that his uncertainties of his future with you, would eventually disappear. danheng had a flicker of hope inside him, hopefully wondering if it'd make a difference.

if it meant that he could stay with you forever, he must go on this mission.

"something's troubling you." you softly mumbled, gently resting your head against his shoulder as you mindlessly caress his hand.

his breath suddenly hitches, a troubled expression laced his features. you grew worried, the longer you gaze at him.

"what's wrong, danheng?" you quietly ask, lips slightly pursed as you await his response.

"y/n, i.." his voice trails off, uncertainties clouding his mind once more.

you gently cup his face within the crevices of your hands, a hint of concern was evident in your visage. danheng sighs shakily, gazing into your eyes.

"i must go on the mission in xianzhou luofu." the aloof man says quietly, slowly placing his he couldn't bear to meet your pained gaze, because he knew too well that it'd break his own heart.

your heart sank at his words, tears beginning to form in the corners of your eyes as you looked into his eyes, disbelief was written in your face.

"danheng, it's too dangerous.." your voice was shaky as each word leaving your lips had suddenly become hard. "i can't handle the thought of you leaving," you quietly mutter, tears cascading your cheeks.

"if it would mean coming back in your arms in peace, i have to." he reasoned with you, sincerity laced in his tone. his calloused, yet gentle hands make its way to caress your face, wiping away your tears.

"danheng, i don't want you to risk that." you admit, shaking your head as more tears streamed down your face. "i'm contented with what we currently have, please.."

"y/n, i don't want to risk losing you," he pauses, a defeated smile forms on his lips. "i'm sorry, please wait for me.." he says softly. he presses the softest kisses on each and every crevice of your face, as if he was engraving his love for you.

it pained him to leave you, it genuinely did. but, it was needed for you. he wanted nothing more, but to rest in your arms with no worries.

"please promise me." your voice finally broke, sobs leave your lips as you struggle to form coherent words. "...promise that you'd come back to me."

he gently kisses your tears away as he gazes deeply into yours, his own eyes held so many untold emotions.

he kisses atop your head, pulling you into the warmest embrace. his comforting warmth engulfed you entirely, seemingly as if he shielded you against all odds.

"i promise you, i will come back to you." he whispers, finally kissing your lips before he leaves.

but, in the end, he knew. he knew that no matter where he went. you were his home, his sanctuary, his peace. he wouldn't want to change that for anything in the universe.

[alexas-fandom-and-random-blog]

I need to get it out of my chest so here's some Striker theories/speculations fandom has come up with that I heavily dislike and why.

Striker has some royalty blood from one parent or both.

Oh God that would suck so much if it became canon cause it absolutely defeats the purpose of his character so far, that of being a lower class imp hating royals with valid reasons even if his actions are violent and sadistic.

As he is he has such an interesting antagonistic role in the story and offers a bunch of good lines directly opposing and questioning the heroes values, choices and morality.

His mere presence and open bashing of the upper class is just good social commentary! If his hatred stems from a combination of his narcissistic nature and bitterness that being born an imp (even mixed or hybrid) robs him from ascending further into the social ladder or even if he survived a traumatic encounter with a royal as its implied and it's fuelled by anger or a combo of all those things all are good for telling a compelling story! All can be done in very interesting ways!

But making him yet another character tied closer to royalty than just being a random person that got screwed over is honestly an underwhelming concept.

Getting screwed over for no good or justified reason should be common with Hell's racist and classist system as its been presented so far and we should get confirmation of that instead of having Striker added to the trend of each of the main characters having special connections with higher ups. It's not only redundant at this point but would make his motivation and social commentary that much weaker.

I swear if it just becomes another daddy or mommy issue imma rage quit so fast!

Striker is half shark demon

His sound design is explicitly constantly emulating the noises a rattlesnake makes. Since he's most likely a hybrid and he says to Blitzo how they are "superior to most of our kind" he's definitely part imp. So we got two halves and we got snake demon and imp, so it's basically covered? lol I don't know how this theory became so popular😅

He doesn't even look close to the design of the other sharks

he only looks like Chaz a little bit.

And lots of characters share similar characteristics like that snout.

This one had some merit with the ringed eyes and imma be real I haven't noticed those elsewhere but like even if he had a grandpa shark what purpose would that serve?

Bah I just don't like it. Let the man be a slimy snake! Its more unique and it suits him better!

Striker is asexual cause he got grossed out by sex jokes

No...just no..

To be clear you could totally read him as asexual! But the reason being the damn sex jokes is giving me whiplash. Striker got flustered and frustrated at best cause the timing of each sex joke was inappropriate as all hell and cause everyone did it as he tried to be intimidating and threaten/kill them. If anything they were bruises to his ego not any indication to his libido.

But like... In all seriousness asexual confirmation deserves more than a reaction to sex jokes.

Hellaverse does it better with Alastor. In his case it does tie in with his sexuality.

Same goes with all the theories that he's homophobic too.

He did the sexy villain thing trying to seduce Blitzo like so explicitly and smiled when Blitzo called it hot then! What are you talking about?

Different situation, more receptive to sexual undertones and instigating them too. That's what I'm trying to say!

And again. Asexual reading can apply. But it can't be just the sex jokes alright?!😭

(yeah yeah it's a joke on itself. still valid I get it.)

Striker is related to Crimson and Moxxie.

Oh this one is the worst one and absolutely gives me a heart attack and thank goodness for the crew's soft confirmation that they aren't via strixxie fanart cause no joke I'd cry since its my favourite ship!

It's just similar horns!!! Striker was designed as a mix between Moxxie and Blitzo and that's the only reason why!

Striker also had sexual tension with Blitzo on screen are you gonna tell me they are related too cause he was designed with half of him in mind?

I hate this theory so much.

Granted purely for shipping reasons but holy shit it got popular and I hated that!

I've had enough with turning every ship into potential incest just cause and harassing fans over it!

Got such "Fizz and Blitzo are siblings" deja vu😬

Ahem...

Anyways yeah that's all.

To end it more positively I love the snake man! Didn't spot him on the trailer but still hope we see him in the upcoming episodes🥺

Preferably doing shit like this and traumatizing everyone lmao! (with no godawful statue jokes in sight thank you very much)

[theghostwife]

Daemon vs. Alicent

So I saw a post on Twitter stating that if Daemon is responsible for Jaehaerys, then Alicent is responsible for Larys killing Harwin and their father and I have so many many thoughts about this. Firstly, I hate that fans of the show constantly attack Alicent. I'm not saying she's a good mother or a good person but blaming her for the acts of the men around her makes little to no sense. Normally, I'd just ignore tweets like this but the parallels I saw could not be ignored and so here I am.

Disclaimer: I'm not going to name the Twitter account I saw. I just don't want them to get attacked or anything.

First of all, their defense of Daemon stems from the fact that we never see him tell B&C to go for anyone else and because those words never left his mouth that we could see, they took it as it's not his fault. However, it was heavily, heavily implied that he did. Cheese asks what should they do if they can't find Aemond. The show allows us to fill in the blanks like we're playing hang-man. The sentence is there, the order is there, we merely need to fill it in.

Then we have his reaction to the news. Did we see surprise on his face? No. Did we see a bit of remorse for a 4-year-old getting killed in place of Aemond? No. He was pleased with the news.

In fact, when Rhaenyra turned to look at him, he was smirking.

He knew exactly what was going to happen and he's happy that at least someone was killed. It didn't matter that Aegon did not send Aemond to kill Lucerys. It did not matter that Jaehaerys is not Aemond's son. It did not matter that Jaehaerys was a child who had no part in the war or conflict. He was collateral damage. Even with all the feelings and expressions of horror around him, including that of Rhaenyra, he did not care.

At least until Rhaenyra spoke to him herself.

When she first confronted him, he says that he sent the Queen's vengeance for her son.

—————————————————————

Rhaenyra: "What did you tell this vengenace? What did you say to him? Daemon? That a boy lies dead and I am accused of killing him."

Daemon: "Mysaria provided me with names and subterfuge. I was clear in my instructions. Aemond, the brother of Aegon the Usurper. I cannot be responsible—"

Rhaenyra: "Cannot be responsible?"

Rhaenyra: "If Aemond was not to be found, what were your instructions then?"

Daemon: "They did not concern in any way that of a little child."

Rhaenyra: "You said it was your aim to spill Hightower blood. If not Aemond, then anyone would do."

—————————————————————

Despite the fact that he denies her accusations, she then goes on to say she doesn't believe him. Then there is this little number.

Now, here they get to the argument of Daemon, his resentment and bitterness that he was passed over as heir for Rhaenyra, and the fact that Aegon now sits on the throne. Even in the book, Daemon hates his nephews solely because they pushed him down the line of succession, so this one sentence here matches up perfectly with how Daemon truly feels.

It wasn't just "revenge" for Luke. It was revenge on the Targtowers, specifically, anyone in their family, any male. The death of Luke, Rhaenyra's declarance just served as a convenient excuse. If Aemond was not to be found, Daemon could have easily told them not to harm anyone else if he truly cared for Rhaenyra and her claim.

On a side note, I think this is really funny considering just before Rhaenyra accused him of using her as an excuse to kill Jaehaerys, she flat-out asked him if she was merely a tool he used to grasp at his stolen inheritance. It seems that in the show, Daemon using her as an excuse has come up more than once. Hell, even Viserys accused him of doing the same. It's just an interesting thing.

Anywho, let's compare this to Alicent and Larys Strong now shall we.

Unlike Daemon who commanded Blood and Cheese to kill Aemond, Alicent gave no such order. She didn't command anyone to be killed, nor did she want anyone to be killed. She merely stated she wanted her father back in King's Landing.

She lamented the fact that there was no one in King's Landing on her side. So what was Larys's response to this?

Larys took her words and acted on his own which resulted in the death of both Harwin and Lyonel. Alicent literally had nothing to do with it so I find it funny that someone compared the two together.

Then they mentioned that an episode later, Alicent rewards him. She wasn't rewarding him. Larys intentionally trapped Alicent with his deeds by stating he did it for her, in her name. If she were to ever expose him for his crimes, all he has to do is say she ordered him to do it in order to have her father back as Hand to the King and he would be believed.

As proof of this, in the next episode, Daemon accuses Alicent of killing Harwin and Lyonel anyway, without much justification other than her and Otto gaining from it. If Daemon thinks this, who else already believes either Alicent or Otto had something to do with it?

Later on in the same episode, Larys once again offered his services and Alicent knew better than to deny him, especially after she attacked Rhaenyra with the dagger, which damaged her reputation with the nobles and Viserys. That was Alicent accepting that she may in fact need his special brand of help later on but it's clear from her face, that she does not want it.

Also, to add to this fact, I think another reason why she said,

—————————————————————

"But your devotion has not gone unnoticed. These are dangerous times. The day will doubtless come when I require such a friend. With not only skill but discretion as well."

is because right before this, Larys subtly offered her the eye of Luke.

"If it's an eye you want to balance the scales, I am your servant."

—————————————————————

So that was her way of leading Larys away from maiming Luke but still allowing him close to her. Alicent with Larys is stuck between a rock and a hard place. This is very evident with him forcing her to sell herself, even if it is just her feet, he gets sexual satisfaction from both her feet and the act of sexual coercion as it gives him power, for basic information.

So the comparison between Daemon with B&C to Alicent and Larys with Harwin & Lyonel is in fact not at all comparable. I'd say that Alicent plays a similar role to Rhaenyra in that aspect and that is the parallel I saw. Saying one thing, making one wish/demand, and having a rogue man take your words, twist them to fit their own intentions and actions, and then say they did it your name while you bear the brunt of blame.

Speaking of the foot scene, this one could be a little different. Larys offers to have Mysaria killed because of her spy network which Otto is aware of but has left in place. Of course, here Alicent knows what will happen and essentially...pays Larys by showing him her feet. It's still an act of sexual coercion but in the end, Alicent says,

—————————————————————

"I assume this task falls within your expertise."

Which Larys responds with,

"If you wish it… it will be done."

—————————————————————

However, I don't think Alicent wanted the entire brothel to be up in flames but we never see her reaction to it, although I have a feeling she could have already known how Larys planned to solve that problem. Nonetheless, had the person on Twitter used that event in particular, it would have been a better comparison.

[cbsghostsmetasandtrevor]

If we’re sharing confessions and critiques, I don’t really like how the show handles LGBTQ+ representation.

Take Isaac. I say this as a queer man, he kind of feels like a “token gay man” character (not the creators’ intention I’m sure, but still). Not only is he the only confirmed mlm character in the main group, but a lot of his personality traits are stereotypes usually associated with queer men, often found in other shows and movies that have these types of characters (ex: he’s sassy, vain, selfish, overly feminine, was stated to “love musicals” in the second episode of the first season, and a lot of his jokes tend to revolve around the fact that he’s sexually attracted to other men (granted this lightened up in later seasons, but it was still very prevalent in the first)).

Besides that, it’s disappointing that the show’s only mlm relationship ended up being so toxic and messy.

Then we have Flower. She’s openly queer and has mentioned being in relationships with other women in the past. However, I feel like most of time said relationships are brushed aside as either Flower having intimacy issues and simply needing a third, or her just being a sexually active person.

Even the side characters who are confirmed queer have their problems imo (except maybe June and Ally, who, even then, we only saw twice), but I think I’d make this ask too long discussing my thoughts on every single one of them.

Now, the representation isn’t ALL bad, and there are other issues I have with these characters besides (Isaac being a colonizer and hippie culture itself having lots of cultural appropriation), but in regards to this specific issue, I just think the representation could be better.

Maybe at least have the characters hinted at being LGBTQ+ be confirmed queer, rather than having said hints be played off as mere jokes (like how Pete and Thor are both believed to be bi due to passing comments made by Pete, heavily implying that he has a crush on Jay, and Thor’s reactions to the lumberjack TikTok and the Dino stripper, as well as talking about “boat rules”).

This is interesting.

I definitely agree that Isaac hasnt really been handled well. They seem to have his commentary, especially early on, as he's the butt of the joke for not knowing himself and everyone else "knowing".

They had a beautiful moment with Hetty but in the finale of S1, they had everyone fake surprise and even have Nigel somehow already expect that he knew. In fact, the whole relationship with Nigel has been pushing her faster than he's clearly comfortable with. That's why I liked the breakup so much.

And yes, to Flower.

They established early on that she's definitely bi but they make all of her significant relationships men. (Which there's nothing wrong with that but it does make it seem like the women are just because she'll sleep with anything that moves).

Speaking of Carols definitely bi and she's written that way, too. Even Nancy feels that way a bit?

They've played with the bi-impliedness of Pete, Thor, Sass and Trevor especially with dino stripper Chris (I want him back so bad), but not really addressing it?

Like it's there to see in their reactions and I kind of wish they would go into it more. Like because they all died when they might not even have considered that being bi is an option, and defaulted to being into women because that was the expectation, it could be an interesting arc for them to learn and accept themselves.

Especially since they all saw it in Isaac, so they should be able to self reflect?

I'd like that more than the forced endgames I'm seeing and expecting.

Thanks for the confession.

[nightmare-foundation]

You said few months ago to aks your thoughts: what exactly do you mean by "Ozpin has long since given up on his task"?

I agree but don't have any coherent thoughts, except I also kind of think Oscar might've returned a spark to him ("You saved us," Ozpin also fighting the merge in the V9 Epilogue storyboard.)

Honestly this is a bit hard to explain bc I haven't touched RWBY in months (I'm neck deep in a batfamily hyperfixation), so my thoughts on this are VERY scattered, but I'll do my best to explain. I might come back and add any additional thoughts I might have.

Essentially, Ozpin doesn't really act like he's actively working towards his God-given task. Even if he is, I think he's doing the absolute bare minimum required of it. He's clearly tried before- if The Infinite Man is a 100% true story- but he labels that attempt as a mistake several times over. On top of that, he hasn't done... anything with the Relics after The Great War. The world was described as being in a time of 'unprecedented peace'- but Ozpin didn't DO anything with that.

I also think it's safe to assume that doing Lights task probably requires- essentially a cult dedicated to him. This is seen in The Infinite Man, since the woman Oz talks to mentions a 'final judgement', and the antagonist towards the end says that Oz's mere existence makes him a target. So it's safe to assume that pretty much everyone knew about his task at this time, and people didn't like the idea of it. I'm pretty sure it's also stated that this is the closest he's gotten to completing it. But as Ozpin recounts this, he repeatedly says that this was a mistake, and clearly regrets his actions here. He had good intentions, but it didn't matter in the end; the Circle was a mistake and he's asking for forgiveness.

On top of that, he says "Some people worship God's, while others insist we must be our own salvation. But the world doesn't work in absolutes, so why can't it be both?" This coupled with The Gift of the Moon and The Man Who Stared at the Sun as well as The Two Brothers heavily imply Oz believes that Light, or both of the Gods but especially Light, is selfish, petty, and that appeasing him not only requires heavy sacrifice, but hurts everyone else, and that humanity can replace the Gods; they don't need them.

The Academies themselves imply this too- they're safe Havens, Beacons of hope, keeping the world raised to shield them from destruction and providing Shade from the unforgiving sun (Light). They're symbolic, representing Oz's core values/beliefs, and one of those is that humanity needs to be shielded from Light. He very much also supports individuality, if the Great War is anything to go by plus the creation of the Academies. Something that, honestly, I don't think Light very much appreciates.

Also, Oz's inner circle doesn't really seem like Light followers to me. They follow Oz, and they believed his story of "The Gods cursed me for failing to stop Salem"- something that doesn't exactly paint them in a good light. The Gods don't seem to matter at all to them, just that they... exist. They also weren't aware of Oz's task, just that Oz wanted to keep things peaceful; not necessarily united, but peaceful. I also wouldn't call Oz's circle a cult either, since imo they really don't fit the bill to me, and it wouldn't make sense if they fit the cult BITE model since it'd hinder more than help, though the group IS dysfunctional.

Also, Oz knows how impossible the task is, knows it's just not possible to appease Light.

I do think he USED to work towards the task, but likely hasn't in a long time. I believe he's trying to keep Salem from the Relics because he believes that a second rebellion would never go well, and Remnant is free enough as is, even if he's essentially still chained via his immortality. Salem sees the Relics as a sort of Sword of Damocles- a constant threat looming over the world. And they are- but I think Ozpin also sees them as tools that could help the world.

Basically I think Oz has come to the conclusion that the world is free enough as is, and that rebelling against the Gods again will end very badly (as it had for Salem), while Salem believes that the world is still in chains. Oz's fears definitely aren't unfounded- after all, the Gods pretty much played with him like a toy by repeatedly reviving and then killing him.

Oz has pretty much completely lost faith in the Gods, if he had much to begin with, and the only reason I believe he followed his task initially was likely due to fear and believing Salem hates him, rather than out of any real devotion.

Oh and, I almost forgot- the tale of the two brothers is widely regarded as a fairytale on Remnant, and the main characters had to be TOLD about them, so it's safe to assume they're not nearly as widely known anymore, and we haven't seen any evidence of anything religious surrounding them yet. So there likely isn't any widespread religion about the Brothers, and if there is a religion, it certainly isn't large. There's definitely no mention of any in-universe backlash of including a supposedly widespread religion in a book of fairytales (and I say this because I've seen people say that it's a widespread religion like Christianity, when there's nothing implying that it currently is. During the time of The Infinite Man? Yeah, but not in the modern day).

Soo, there's my analysis on Oz and if he's still working towards his task and what his thoughts on the Gods are.

[maskednerd]

FNAF Movie parallel Theory/Incoherent Ramblings! (Spoilers ahead.)

Originally, I was gonna give my thoughts on the film but I'm bad at opinions so theory time it is! This is just for fun and to share my thoughts.

I've only seen the film once so I might have misremembered a few things here or there. But there's no harm looking for connections and parallel to the games/books!

Since Mike isn't an Afton... his dad could be a subtle parallel to Henry Emily. Which would make Garett and/or Abby a parallel to Charlie.

Of course, the Schmidt family still has elements of the Aftons. But with all the changes to the lore, the Emily roles could have been added on rather than being non-existent like it seems.

Now, you may be wondering if I'm just desperately digging for any sign of Henry Emily in this film cus he's my favorite character (aside from Michael Afton). And to that I say-

...

Shhhhhhh... Pretend it's not that obvious.

Anywho, let's get to some of these parallels! Shall we?

Aunt Jane… Aunt Jen? Her name being a possible parallel to Henry's sister in the books.

Kinda a weak point here but I'll include it anyways. The Schmidt family is showed to be Christian, evident by Mike remembering them gathered around the table saying grave before eating. "For one of you, the darkest pit of hell has opened to swallow you whole, so don't keep the Devil waiting, old friend."

Mike mentioned that his father couldn't handle the lost of Garret, vaguely implying he took his own life. In both the books and the games, Henry committed suicide due to the lost of his child. Silver Eyes had the Suicide Bot and Pizza Sim had the fire. "I am remaining as well. I am nearby."

Garret's death happened before the Missing Children Incident. In the photo that Vanessa shows with her as a child next to her father as Spring Bonnie, she has the same toy plane Garret had when he taken. Which Mike notices. But, with that photo being at the Pizzeria, it's assumed it's still open during that time. Yet Vanessa mentions the Pizzeria was closed shorty after the 5 children went missing. That photo probably wouldn't exist in that form if the place was dealing with an police investigation and a threat of closure.

During Mike's dream sequences, Garret seems unnervingly calm. Almost as though he went willingly. Yet it wouldn't make sense, out in the middle of a forest, for William to be dressed in the SpringBonnie suit in an attempt to lure him. But, if William was a family friend and trusted by his father, it would be easier to get Garret into his car.

If Garret Schmidt was a random child he abducted and murdered on a mere whim, why would "Steve Raglan" recognize that last name? Unless he saw missing posters, the news of the disappearance, or was keeping track of the viticm's families, why remember that random child you killed back in the 80s? One that wasn't even a part of the Missing Children's Incident at Freddy's?

At the end credits, there's the "COME FIND ME" audio easter egg resembling "SAVE THEM." A minigame heavily linked to the puppet, despite the puppet making no appearance nor having a single mention in the movie.

As for Abby... that springlock suit she was almost suited in looked an awfully lot like Ella, one of Charlie's toys from the books. For a reference to Elizabeth, it could have been a clown or something looking like Circus Baby. But why that possible reference to Ella?

Haven't read Silver Eyes in a a good while, but isn't there a sequence where Foxy is chasing Charlie through an arcade? Where she hides behind one of the arcade cabinets, just like Abby does?

Are these just random references and easter eggs pieced together in an incoherent rambling? Indeed they are, thanks for noticing! But that won't stop me from pointing them out for no one else to read.

[super-paper]

:re your tags about body motifs in bnha got me curious about something. I can think off the top of my head several examples of how this applies to the trio, and a couple more about how this applies to AFO. But can I ask you to expand on how the eye motif is present in AFO specifically? The hands and mouth are obvious, but I can't say I've ever picked up on the symbolism around eyes when it comes to him. Well, unless you're referring to that scene with the sensors in Tartarus. But I'm curious if there's more that I missed, and since I'm a slut about themes and symbolism (and the eye theme relating to the todofam in particular), I would love a deep dive into it and how they're connected, if you don't mind sharing, of course 👀 Really love your meta btw

Thank youu~!

Yea, the eyes def receive less focus overall compared to the emphasis placed on AFO's mouth/hands-- but I feel that AFO's association with eyes is still pretty important even if they don't get as much focus, and the rare scenes where we -do- get to focus on his eyes + his relationship with eyes do a lot for his character.

↑ Breaking down AFO's character design to its barest essentials, you can see Hori more or less designed his "true" appearance with these three elements in mind: mouths, hands, and eyes. A perpetual mask-like grin, the stigmata marks to both hands, and completely blank white eyes. Hori uses the composition and lighting in his art to further emphasize these aspects, usually by placing focus on one part/motif at a time-- AFO is essentially introduced to us in pieces, bit by bit, body part by body part.

I would say act 1 focuses primarily on his hands, while act 2 shifts to focusing on his mouth/smile. The final act is where we finally start exploring AFO's relation to eyes-- and imo, Hori chose to focus on AFO's eyes last b/c AFO's eyes seem to be what connect him to his humanity and """true""" feelings:

Panels that emphasize AFO's eyes specifically are almost always tied to Yoichi! It's a neat and completely loaded little detail. In what's heavily implied to be the aftermath of Yoichi's death, we suddenly shift from obscuring AFO's eyes to obscuring his mouth-- the total reverse of how he's typically depicted during flashback scenes. His eyes (and tears) receive all the focus. The narration doesn't match or address what we're actually*seeing* in a fashion that's eerily similar to the way that Tomura narrates over the deaths of his family. There's a lot of set up here already, and I'm looking forward to see how it all ultimately pays off.

And if eyes are ultimately the motif that ties AFO to his humanity, then the lack of eyes throughout Act's 1 & 2 also feels intentional.

Blank eyes are also a design trait he shares with Twice (i.e. "Guy whose own quirk drove him to insanity and completely wrecked his sense of identity/individuality") and Sir Nighteye (i.e. "Guy whose quirk lets him see into the future of others, and the future he saw caused him to fall into despair and become a bitter husk of his former self")-- both characters are depicted w/ blank eyes for 90% of their screen time, but "gain" pupils during key scenes. Twice stands out in particular, bc Hori starts consistently drawing him with pupils immediately after he's able to verify his identity and overcome the trauma associated with his quirk.

Also worth mentioning: Jin kicks off his entire arc talking about the importance of knowing who you are and lamenting about the pains that come with losing sight of yourself/no longer being able to connect with or trust others, and he completes his arc by affirming that he knows exactly who he is and dedicating his heart completely to others. Nighteye's entire arc is about smashing past his fear of the future and the fear of change while *also* learning to value Mirio and Izuku as individuals instead of merely viewing them as vessels for OFA. Both arcs are very much relevant to AFO's whole deal as a character/antagonist and the overall theme(s) of MHA as a whole. Twice and Nighteye serve as semi-heroic foils to AFO who manage overcome the same shortcomings that AFO implicitly struggles with, specifically because they allowed themselves to care about others-- So imo it's neat that these three all share this particular design trait!

they're also the two characters whose deaths have the most narrative impact outside of Yoichi and Nana/The Shimura Fam (whoops)

The final act has also been placing more and more emphasis on how a person's eyes look when they finally get to be their best selves and follow their dreams, and how they sparkle and shine when they think about their origins and their hopes for the future (and I've talked about how this contrasts with Tomura's fairly dead-eyed expression whenever he talks about his "dreams" of destroying everything before (link!), so I'm pretty pleased that the narrative is now calling attention to how a person's eyes look + making the total lack of ~shine~ in Tomura's eyes a very intentional thing).

AFO addresses this directly-- on the surface, he appears to be echoing Touya's desire to be "seen" and expresses resentment that people aren't looking at him. But where Touya longs to be seen in a way that truly validates his humanity and reason for existing, AFO instead wants to be "seen" as something completely devoid of those human qualities. Dabi wants people to see Touya, Mysterious Shigaraki X only wants people to see "AFO." He wants to be a looming, mythical figure who blots out the sun itself-- and when people look towards their future, they should only be seeing a path that ends with him and him alone:

This sequence will never not be thematically relevant

Tomura, Himiko, and Touya all desire the basic human connections that are associated with Hands/Mouths/Eyes. Even as they continue to lash out and use their respective motifs in increasingly violent/self-destructive ways, their core desire never changes. The desire to be touched gently, the desire to be spoken to like a normal girl, and the desire to be truly seen-- that longing for human intimacy (and who they ultimately seek understanding/intimacy from) betrays what their true desires are more than anything else.

AFO shares the same body motifs as the hero and villain trios, but he's a corrupted version of those motifs and represents what hands/mouths/eyes are capable of at their absolute worst. AFO doesn't truly "see" others. AFO doesn't see people as individuals, he only sees them as extensions of himself or as bit-part "roles" to be played out in his increasingly off-the-rails real people fanfiction. AFO doesn't want people to look to the future or even attempt looking beyond him. AFO doesn't want anyone to see what lies behind his shadowy mask and the AFO persona. AFO counts on society to avert their eyes from problems and pretend they don't see, so he can swoop in and play the benevolent savior to those who have been abandoned. AFO doesn't want anyone to see "Tenko," he only wants them to see "Shigaraki." Et cetera et cetera et cetera.

Anyway--!!

There's also the underlying implication that AFO wants everyone to have eyes that are just like his:

Blank. Empty. Completely devoid of spark and soul, pushed past the brink of total despair, with no hope whatsoever for a future.