#i'm just pointing that out recreationally

[jokeroutsubs]

[ENG translation] Joker Out: The third souvenir (22.11.2024)

An interview with Joker Out published in Vikend Magazine, a weekly insert of the Delo newspaper, on the 22nd of November 2024. Photos by Primož Lukežič.

Translation by a member of JokerOutSubs, review by @weolucbasu, proofread by IG GBoleyn123.

After Europe, it's time for Thailand

Last week, Joker Out released a much-anticipated third studio album 'Souvenir Pop', which they are presenting on the 'Album Release Tour'. The tour will take them to Serbia, North Macedonia, Croatia and Austria; in Slovenia, meanwhile, after two sold-out concerts in Ljubljana, they have an upcoming presentation in Maribor as well. Before they run off abroad, we gave them a few jumping off points...

THE SONG THAT WAS THE REASON YOU BECAME A MUSICIAN...

Jure: Mark Knopfler – 'What It ls'.

Bojan: Siddharta – 'Ring'.

Jan: The song 'Killing in the Name' by Rage Against The Machine was the reason I bought a guitar.

Nace: I took up an instrument because of Avril Lavigne, that was very early on. But it was Dubioza ko­lektiv that inspired me to play the bass.

Kris: I think I'm a musician because of the song 'Črn tulipan', because I also probably wouldn't even exist without it.

FOR YOUR NEXT HOLIDAY TOGETHER, YOU'RE GOING...

Jure, Jan, Nace and Kris (all excitedly): To Thailand!

Bojan: Without Bojan. (laughter)

THE FIRST AND LAST ONES TO ARRIVE TO REHEARSALS...

Jure: I'm often first, Jan has also been pretty early lately. Meanwhile, Kris has been late recently.

Bojan: I would also say Jure, he's usually there about an hour before the others. As for the last one to get to rehearsals... it might even be me.

Jan: Jure is definitely first, I used to be last, but Kris has replaced me now.

Nace: Jure arrives first, and it's probably true that Bojan is last. But it's more like, he arrives right on time. So he's not late, he just arrives after us.

Kris: Jure arrives first, Bojan last.

THE BAND MEMBER WITH THE MOST INTERESTING HOBBY...

Bojan, Jan, Nace and Kris: Definitely Jure.

Jure: Well, I'm a bit of a nutcase. (laughter) None of us truly have a hobby, but I come the closest to it. I used to consider playing an instrument a hobby, but that has turned into a kind of job now. In my free time, I like to take care of my garden at home, craft things from wood, but most of all, I do everything myself. For example, I designed our entire rehearsal space and, with the boys' help, built the whole thing myself. Last year, I bought an old moped, restored it, and went on a ten-day tour around Slovenia with a friend. Well, I almost forgot, I've also started climbing recreationally.

WHEN DID YOU COME CLOSEST TO THINKING: WHY AM I DOING THIS?

Jure: In the studio.

Bojan: In the studio this year, when we were recording this album. Several times!

Jan: In the studio.

Nace: I said that this morning because I woke up too early and had to leave the house. (The others: To the hairdresser's!)

Kris: Today at 4 pm.

THE BEST OR WORST TRIP TO A CONCERT/TOUR OR BACK...

Bojan: The trip from Munich to The Hague, when they cancelled four of our flights, the Flixbus was also late or rather, did not arrive at all, so we had to take a taxi to Stuttgart and pay more than two thousand euros. That one takes the cake.

Jure: The most wonderful moment was when we were leaving the last concert of the tour, from Padova, and the tour bus dropped us off in Slovenia. We partied on the bus for two hours. (Bojan: Five hours!) It was really good.

THE JOKER OUT SONG YOU PLAY MOST OFTEN AT HOME...

Jure: An unreleased song, because I have to practice it.

Bojan: I don't usually play our songs, but I think that in the process of releasing this album, I played 'Stephanie' and 'Ako toga više neće biti' the most.

Jan: I also don't play our songs, except when I'm working on the sound for our concerts. Otherwise – anything current.

Nace: I don't play Joker Out songs. But I've definitely grown fond of 'Everybody's Waiting' which I heard after a long time and I have to admit that I played it at home.

Kris: I also like to play 'Everybody's Waiting'.

A SPECIAL RITUAL BEFORE A CONCERT...

Jure: Half an hour before a concert I go to the dressing room, change my clothes, warm up, and then go on stage.

Bojan: What a cool ritual! We're full of cool rituals. (laughter) We don't have any rituals, which is our ritual. We're ritual-less. (laughter)

THE MOST UNUSUAL LETTER OR WORDS FROM A FAN...

Jure: To me, a letter itself is unusual, because we're not used to receiving them from our loved ones anymore. It's not "in" anymore. Our fans, however, write some things by hand now, and when we receive those, we each read it and save some nice ones.

Bojan: What touches me the most are letters about personal struggles that people got through, or were helped, by being part of the Joker Out community. But also: Burn in hell, bastard. (laughter)

Jan: Marriage proposals in written form.

Nace: I have a really ridiculous one, but... A girl wrote me a letter about how since I said somewhere that I liked Pokemon, she started researching it and got totally into the series, started watching it and collecting the cards.

Kris: A letter that said that I should give Bojan one of my photos. (laughter)

[lady-harrowhark]

you know, the one thing i will give john some credit for in terms of arranging the whole Great Lyctor Bake Off is that as far as strategy goes, bringing in the heirs of the Houses was actually pretty slick.

nabbing the heirs specifically means that the existing power structures remain in place for the time being. the current system’s not entirely under his thumb (case in point: the Sixth) but it doesn’t throw the entire empire into chaos the way simultaneously yoinking every House leader would. if the heirs die? bummer, but life goes on.

but if the heirs ascend? john suddenly has super-powered nepotism babies perfectly positioned to take the reins of their respective Houses and keep them within his reach.

[crimeronan]

that ask made me think back to amity and hunter's early days in this AU. where they truly are just being. as nasty as possible to each other. for no fucking reason.

(the reason is because hunter deals with irrational jealousy through terrorism and amity deals with terrorism through more terrorism. Good For Them)

they've both said so many Truly Unbelievably Vile things to each other that i doubt either of them even remembers 85% of it at the point they're at now. hunter ABSOLUTELY at least once retaliated to the half-a-witch taunts with "at least i don't have a mentor who only likes me for my magic. what are you gonna do when lilith realizes you're useless"

this is pretty par-for-the-course meanness. but ohhhh my god.... the way it would come back to bite him in the "understanding amity" plotline. lilith is like haha fantastic!! my protege set her mind on fire because i was too harsh about her studies!! i need to go directly to hell!! immediately!! forever!!!!

and hunter is like. [flashing back to this entire fight] [realizing he himself may have inspired these contingency plans Ages Ago]

She Did Fucking What.

[heartbeetz]

I REALLY need to do something with Bob and Kenzie's "backstory" (how they started dating)... a fic or comic maybe, idk. It's so good but I've talked about it maybe once.

[laurashapiro-noreally]

Whoever you are, you understand me

I swam today for the first time in 6 months because my mom has a membership to a pool and the whole time I was like wow it's just like I'm in the river....I'm literally just like harrow rn for real. ..I'm exactly like nona with her jellyfish too :) dramatically doing laps pretending I was in the metaphysical space between life & death

[atimeofyourlife]

Go ahead, rip my heart out

Part 1 of my make it worse-before it gets better fic that I teased here

rated: t | wc: 1350 After 8x06, Buck crashes on Eddie's couch for the night. Eddie finds him the next morning presenting with cardiac symptoms on his couch.

"We must be getting old if just a few beers are leaving you looking like that." Eddie joked as he came into the living room to see Buck sat hunched over on the couch. He knew that it was more likely the events of the previous evening that had lead him to bringing over a six pack and then sleeping on Eddie's couch. He got concerned when Buck didn't respond, and he seemed to be struggling for breath, and not in a way that indicated that he'd been crying.

"Buck, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He asked, hurrying around the couch to kneel in front of Buck.

"Hurts." Buck gasped out, clutching at his chest.

"When did this start?" Eddie pulled his phone out of his picked, just in case he needed to call help.

"Few minutes." Buck replied, and Eddie winced at how short of breath he was.

"Okay, I'm just going to check your pulse." Eddie pressed his fingers to Buck's pulse point, and frowned. "There's some arrhythmia. I'm calling 911."

read more below the cut or on a03

"911, what's your emergency?" Eddie let out an involuntary sigh of relief when he didn't recognize the voice. He didn't know how he would explain it to anyone they knew.

"This is off duty firefighter Eddie Diaz. I need an RA unit to 4995 South Bedford Street. Patient is a thirty three year old male presenting with angina, shortness of breath, and arrhythmia. He has some history of heart problems after being struck by lightning two years ago, but has had a clean bill of cardiac health for around eighteen months. He also has a history of blood clots, about five years ago, caused by hardware in his leg from an injury."

"Okay, and what is the patient's name?"

"Evan Buckley. He's also a firefighter. He's my heavy rescue partner at the 118." He stopped for a moment as Buck slumped forward. "He's just fainted."

"Did he hit his head or fall into a position where he is potentially unsafe?"

"No. He was sitting on the couch and slumped forward. I caught him before he went down."

"Can you reposition him so he is lying down on the couch?

"Yeah. Give me a minute." He pushed on Buck's shoulders to get him to lie back, then pulled his legs round so he was flat on the couch. "Done."

"Okay. And do you know if he has taken anything in the last twenty four hours?"

"He's not currently on any prescription medication, and he doesn't use anything recreationally, because of the job. He was drinking last night, but we only split a six pack of beer."

"Can you unlock a door, the ambulance is just a few minutes out."

"Yeah." Eddie got up and practically ran to the front door, glancing back at the couch constantly. He unlocked the door and was back beside Buck in seconds. "The front door is unlocked, and opens right into the lounge."

Eddie kept an eye on Buck, reassuring him gently when he regained consciousness. A few minutes later, the door opened. "LAFD."

"Over here." He called back.

"We got him, Diaz." One of the paramedics said, kneeling next to him with a lifepak.

Eddie just nodded, and stood up. He realized it was the 133 there, so he was pretty familiar with most of the crew.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. He came over with some beers last night and crashed on the couch. This morning when I woke up I found him on the couch hunched over. Shortness of breath, angina, arrhythmia. It came out of nowhere." He explained, watching as the paramedics hooked Buck up to the lifepak. He hadn't felt this scared for his best friend since the lightning strike.

"His blood pressure is pretty low too." One of the paramedics chimed in. "We need to take him in. His heart doesn't seem healthy right now."

He couldn't help feeling a little useless while they got Buck ready and loaded onto the gurney. He felt like that was his job, that he should be taking care of Buck. He made sure that he had both his and Buck's phones as well as his keys before following them out to the ambulance.

"M-Mad's-" Buck mumbled, reaching out towards Eddie.

"I'll call Maddie, I'll let her know." Eddie reassured him. "I'll ask her to meet us at the hospital. Don't worry about it."

--

The ride to the hospital was uncomfortable, but not the worst. He held Buck's hand tight and just let the paramedics work.

At the hospital, the paramedics took the lead to inform the medical team on what was happening, but Eddie cut in to add information about the lightning strike, history of blood clots, and Buck's allergies.

"Diaz." Captain Mehta called out as Eddie made to follow the team into the hospital. "Do you want me to inform Captain Nash?"

"No. I'll call him. I just need to call Buck's sister first." Eddie replied, before making his way inside. Calling Maddie to tell her that Buck was in the hospital again was never something he wanted to do.

Eddie tucked himself in the corner of the waiting area, knowing there were going to be a lot of tests they had to run for Buck to find out what was going on with his heart. He tried to get his thoughts in order before dialing Maddie's number.

"Hey, Eddie. What's up?" Maddie sounded cheerful, and he hated to break that for her.

"I, uh. I had to call an ambulance for Buck this morning. We're at First Presbyterian." He said, ripping off the painful part first.

"Why? What happened? Is Buck okay?" She sounded shocked.

"It's his heart. I don't know what's going on yet, we've only just got here." He explained. "He crashed at mine last night. When I woke up he was having cardiac symptoms. Angina, shortness of breath, arrhythmia. He fainted on my couch while I was on the phone to dispatch, and when the paramedics were there he had low blood pressure."

"Oh, my god." Maddie gasped. "I'm on my way. Should we call Tom-"

"No." Eddie said definitively. Knowing that having Tommy there could make it worse. "I. I think we should leave telling anyone else until we know more about what's going on."

"Okay. I'll be there soon. Thanks for letting me know, Eddie."

--

Eddie stayed sat in the corner, looking up every time someone moved, looking for Maddie, for Buck. For a nurse or doctor coming to inform him what was going on.

Maddie came hurrying in around thirty minutes after he'd called her. "Any updates?"

"Not yet." He replied. He wrapped an arm around Maddie for a brief hug. "I guess we just have to wait."

"I hate this. He-he's always in a hospital bed."

"I know. I hate it too." They fell into a silence as they waited, neither sure on how to fill it.

"Family of Evan Buckley?" Someone called after a while.

"That's us." Eddie said, both he and Maddie made their way over.

"I'm his sister, this is his best friend and one of his medical proxies." Maddie introduced.

"We've ruled out a heart attack, and it doesn't seem to be a delayed response to the lightning strike."

"Oh, thank god." Maddie murmured.

"But what was it?" Eddie asked.

"We have a few ideas, some more likely than others. There has been some recent stress on the heart, so I have to ask has he been through any recent major stressors? Physical or emotional."

"He's a firefighter and dislocated his shoulder on the job a few weeks ago. But other than that-" Maddie explained.

"His boyfriend broke up with him last night. It came out of nowhere." Eddie cut in.

"Tommy did what?" Maddie seemed shocked.

"He broke up with Buck. Some bullshit about being his first not his last."

"That does tie in with what our top theory is right now." The doctor replied. "We believe it's likely to be takotsubo cardiomyopathy. That's also known as-"

"Broken heart syndrome." Maddie finished, barely holding back tears.

[mulletmitsuya]

Tokyo Revengers Groupchat (not everyone, also random combinations, no specific gang)

Warnings: swearing, suggestive, homophobia by a gay person (just sillies), mentions of vomit and poison, mentions of drugs

Desc: placenta, placebo, or gazebo? 🤔

Rindou: yk when you tell someone something then they believe it and it works?

Rindou: like what you're saying isn't true but cause they think it is, it works

Ran: yes

Ran: the placenta effect

Izana: here we fucking go

Smiley: you're kidding right?😁

Ran: are you going to put a Smiley face after every single thing you text?

Ran: we get it, you smile really wide 👍

Smiley: kys

Ran: so hostile and for what

Mikey: idk what the word is but it's definitely not placenta

Izana: how even?

Mitsuya: ...the placebo effect??

Ran: isn't that those huge tent things

Mitsuya: that's a gazebo

Ran: oh

Ran: same thing

Smiley: you dumb as hell

Hakkai: you'd think that big ass forhead of yours would be worth something

Hakkai: smh

Ran: and you'd think after 10 years you'd get over whatever grudge you have against me

Hakkai: you literally hit my best friend (future bf) over the head with a brick

Chifuyu: thought you could sneak that in huh

Hakkai: he could have died

Ran: but he didn't?

Ran: i was just being silly and having fun

Ran: is that such a crime🙄

Hakkai: ITS FUCKING ATTEMPTED MURDER

Rindou: so is it placebo, placenta, or gazebo?

Mitsuya: it's placebo

Kazutora: placenta's are in females stomachs for pregnancy i think

Baji: that's the uterus (i'm so fucking smart)

Chifuyu: none of those are correct

Draken: google exists also

Draken: why are you asking us

Rindou: shut up for a sec

Rindou: would the placenta effect potentially kill someone

Rindou: like if you told someone that you poisoned them and then after a while they start frothing at the mouth and shit, could they die?

Rindou: or are they being a little bitch and faking lol

Rindou: i didn't actually put the rat poison in his drink (i think)

Rindou: but it kinda seems like he's dying or smth

Mikey: what the fuck is this situation

Mikey: is this real?💀

Rindou: nah

Rindou: hypothetically

Ran: does this have to do with the ambulance being here

Rindou: nah

Rindou: can y'all just answer me

Rindou: hurry before the "poison", does it's job or whatever

Rindou: guys he's throwing up pretty violently

Rindou: there's blood

Rindou: hypothetically

Izana: who would you have "hypothetically" poisoned?😐

Rindou: bro that's not the point, sir

Izana: stop calling me sir in normal situations

Izana: we're normal now and not in a gang and i'm a normal person not a gang leader

Mochi: so we don't have to call you Izana-sama anymore?

Ran: what if it turns us on

Izana: uhm

Kakucho: fuck off

Kakucho: sorry

Ran: Kaku give it up, he's way too old for you

Rindou: so y'all just gonna let the hypothetical person die? ayt

Rindou: i'm on my way to the hospital for unrelated reasons

Kakucho: who's the hypothetical victim of the placebo

Rindou: uhhh Sanzu

Kakucho: LMAO

Kakucho: let him hypothetically die then 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Mitsuya: punch him in the stomach

Rindou: i know a lot of y'all don't like him but we're friends now and i don't want him to die also he has the best drugs so i'd rather he stay alive so that i can enjoy them recreationally

Rindou: but i'll do it anyway

Mitsuya: stfu for a sex, punching him will make him throw up, and he'll vomit most of the poison out

Rindou: oh like in the stomach?

Rindou: he's gonna be so mad at me, damn

Baji: "shut up for a sex" lmaoooooo🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Baji: and you guys say I'M diabetic💀💀

Mikey: bro what?😭

Kakucho: you mean dyslexic?

Kakucho: nvm the situation speaks for itself

Smiley: the irony of this is crazy

Draken: that got a chuckle outta me 😂

Chifuyu: why you text like a 40 year old dad💀

Ran: i never went to school but even i know that's incorrect

Hakkai: "i never went to school but even i know that's incorrect 🤓👆"

Hakkai: jump into oncoming tragic you f slur🖕

Smiley: aur naur you done made Hakkai homophobic

Ran: you need to fucking chill omg

Mitsuya: are you five years old, Baji

Baji: nah i'm 24 dumbness🤨

Baji: *dumbass

Izana: my oath for not using violence anymore might have to be on hold cause you guys are pissing me the fuck off you fucking incompetent fools useless excuses of human beings

Smiley: bro called us fools

Ran: that's a bit much, sir

Baji: bet you're typing with your left hand

Ran: uh huh <3

Rindou: get some fucking bitches, damn

Ran: where are your bitches, Rindou

Rindou: on my dick

Ran: oh you're talking about the femboys?

Ran: ohh ok i thought you weren't gay but whatever

Mikey: yo is haruchiyo alive?

Rindou: they're pumping his stomach, he'll be fine

Rindou: liking femboys isn't gay

Smiley: 🤨

Angry: 🤨

Rindou: don't act dumb because it's literally in the term 'fem'

Draken: uh, what about the 'boy' part

Rindou: don't twist my words

Rindou: how is liking something that looks like a girl, gay??

Mitsuya: bffr 😐

Rindou: y'all telling me if i fuck haruchiyo i'm gay???

Hakkai: he's a boy?

Rindou: he looks like a woman

Rindou: have you seen his body? tiny ass waist headass. y'all come to the onsen next time you'll see what i mean

Chifuyu: you're being weird rn

Ran: what about his penis, Rindou

Rindou: that's irrelevant

Rindou: besides it's barely noticeable

Draken: people like you and Koko are the fucking problem, get some therapy

Smiley: Rindou thinks fucking a guy in the ass isn't gay 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Rindou: "FEM"

Draken: BOY???? MALE??? MAN??? DICK???

Rindou: ok who's gay now, weirdo🤨

Draken: kys (kill yourself)

[lord-squiggletits]

What do you think Pharma's relationship with flight/his alt-form is?

He's pretty divorced from his flying alt-mode, mainly for internalized Functionism reasons imo. It's not that Pharma has any aspersions towards or fear of flying, but I think because of his alt-mode exemption-- the fact that he literally had to be an exception,that he became a doctor despite being a jet rather than simply being a doctor and a jet-- he distanced himself from his alt-mode at least on a subconscious level because, politically/socially, maintaining his safety and position in society meant that he was forced to play up his "forged medic" half and downplay his "jet" half. It's honestly the only plausible explanation I can come up with to explain Tyrest's "famous for being forged" line bc that's literally the only thing I can think of that would make Pharma famous for being forged and not just for being a doctor.

I'm struggling to find a good, non-offensive allegory, but I'd imagine it's a similar struggle to someone who's biracial, multicultural, multinational, etc: there's always a struggle where people whose existence/identity straddles multiple boundaries always get forced into only being one of those things, not allowed to be multilayered and complex. For Functionist reasons, Pharma can't just be a doctor who turns into a jet, he has to be a Doctor TM and be really good at being a Doctor TM because that's the role/half of himself that society has decided is the most important part. Not only as a matter of prejudice, but that he was literally told "you exist to be a Doctor TM (but actually we could take away your ability to be a doctor at any time)."

So as a result of all that, I actually take Pharma's lack of transforming on-screen in canon and extrapolate that into the headcanon that Pharma rarely transforms/flies in general. For one, it's just because he physically needs to be in root mode to do his job, and his job is basically the only thing he does, ergo he's in root mode basically all the time. And for two, bc of internalized Functionism, Pharma basically distanced himself from his alt-mode and neglected flying as part of his lifestyle. Sort of a defense mechanism of "If I fly too much or enjoy flying recreationally/as a sport, what if someone Notices and decides I make a better jet than doctor."

I actually headcanon that Pharma is shit at flying and very noticeably so, like to the point that other jet alt-modes are like "Dude wtf how can you be forged as a jet and fly this badly." It sucks really badly for Pharma bc it basically then puts him in a position where in the world of the intellectual class, he's otherized as Alt-Mode Exempt TM, but in the world of other jets, he's otherized because he's not freight/military and doesn't have the same lived experiences, skills, culture, etc that other jets do. So unfortunately, Pharma basically lives that mixed kid life of "No matter where I go, I'm always the odd one out because people always notice how I'm Not Fully One Of Them."

[antimony-medusa]

As we all engage with the Egg arc on QSMP, I know we're all having a fun time talking about how emotionally devastating it all is, but I have seen some concerning takes about this, so I want to also reiterate that it is fiction. It's not real.

You can have real emotions about fiction (talk to any D&D player whos run a long campaign about this), but it is essentially fake, it is something you can box up and put away. And if you think you can't tell the difference between a fictional roleplay and real life child death, you need to step away.

Cause like, I have been seeing people comparing egg deaths to real life tragedies, and like. Guys. That's just offensively disrespectful. I do not want Chayanne to die. I'm team "storm heaven and get all the eggs back". I want the happy dragon ending. I have also had real life children die in my life and equating a pixel egg despawning to that makes me actually mad. We can have fun with it but this is fiction and you need to be clear to yourself that it is fiction. The QSMP admins are not "responsible to give you a happy ending" because it is essentially not real, they are ethically responsible for how they treat people in the real world (the players and the admins) not for what happens in the story they are telling.

There are two aspects of this that are important. The first is the most basic. Fiction is not real. It's lies we tell ourselves recreationally. No real people were harmed. No one actually died. The egg's admins are fine and now playing league of legends on stream. You can have real emotions about fiction, but you can also take comfort in the fact that the bad thing didn't actually happen. This allows you to engage with topics that you would never want to happen in real life (horror media, for example), in an entertaining way. Fiction is a safe spot to explore really concerning topics, whether that's something you're afraid of, something that has happened to you, or something that you'd never want to see happen in real life but it scratches that brain itch. And that isn't intended to say that you have to be comfortable with every topic in fiction. Suicide themes even in fiction are too close to real life for me, so I stay away from them. You get to set your own comfort levels with what fiction you're comfortable with. And that leads into my second point. The essense of fiction is that you are opting into it. Except in vanishingly rare cases, if you are engaging with something fictional, you are giving ongoing consent to engaging with the story by continuing to watch/read/listen to it. At any point you can tap out and step away, back into real life. You have the power to control your experience and say "yes I am watching this" or "no I do not want to engage with this actually". You can take the headphones off. You are an active player in how you deal with the fictional story, and if it gets too much for you, you get to step away. You get to write fanfiction and it is just as real as the original. If someone is dying in real life, no amount of blocked terms and telling your friends not to discuss it is going to keep it from happening. It is inescapable. It happens to you, it is enacted on you, you are a passive figure and you have no control. The only thing you have a control over is how you react to it, and this is why a huge element of grief is the powerlessness.

You have power over fiction. You can opt out of it. And if you can't tell the difference between a fake story and real events, a) you need to do work on that, because there is a lot of really upsetting content in fiction that is going to fuck you up, b) you need to step away from the fake story that is doing harm to you, and use that power that fiction gives you to opt out of it. Block terms. Unfollow people. Go do something in real life. Fiction is not real.

[pinkestmenace]

Sometimes when I'm pondering the orbs/trying to scrape up what little characterisation there is of Galacta Knight so I can figure out how to write his character, the little quippy shotgun rider in the back of my mind chips in:

He's a 10, but he laughs like a demented seagull. "AAHAhahaha!"

He has the appetite and hubris of a seagull trying to swallow an entire hotdog.

He and Meta Knight are studying each other in a petri dish.

No fear -> Meets Bandee's Nana -> One fear

The elegance of a swan, the indomitable spirit of a territorial mother goose, the tenacity of a pigeon with a clubfoot. And the aggression of a swan.

Teeth teeth teeth goose tomia teeth 😬

Me, thinking: "Even after he chooses to better himself he's still not exactly a sweet person." Me-not-me: "That's-a spicy meatball!"

Have you ever looked a chicken in the eye? They remember when they were dinosaurs.

You can lead a Galacta Knight to healthy conflict resolution, but you can't make him drink.

He's a homing pigeon. Homing in on your location.

Instead of hitting him with the scary hands beam like Starflungwaddledee, you hit him with the scary teeth beam. And then the scary hands beam.

When all you have is a lance, everything starts looking like a target.

He's the Hero Circling the Origin. Circling it like a drain.

Uses 'fowl' language.

"Bah!" GK is Scrooge being tormented by the ghosts of his victims past, present and yet to come (and the grim reaper) to change his ways before it's too late.

GK is not really a man, because while he's bipedal he's not featherless.

Stabbing children isn't his favourite pastime. Teaching children how to stab, on the other hand...

This is less of a 'We can fix him if we hug him enough!'-fic and more of a 'We're showing him the tools to improve, but he has to pick them up himself. Which he won't do until he thinks he's worth it.'-fic.

His breakdown is like the emotional equivalent of draining pus from a festering wound.

The inherent homoeroticism of stabbing a man with a stubby pink lance...and then having to pull it out by the shaft.

He's not entirely unhinged, but his hinges are rusty and failing.

Galacta Knight *gets hit with several deadly weapons*. "'Tis but a scratch."

Kirby stopping him: "I defeated him with the power of friendship! And this sharp stick I inhaled."

He has the petty meanness of a parrot.

He explodes recreationally.

Worse: he flies into the air, displays the colours of the pansexual flag and THEN explodes. Extremely straight behaviour.

Instead of the Maiden, the Mother and the Crone he contains the holy trinity of thwarted theater kid, world-weary butch and the Faggiest Grandfather in the Galaxy.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

He could absolutely kill you and might even laugh while doing so, but it's not so much him being gleefully murderous as:

Fighting is one of the few reprieves from his unfathomable boredom and frustration.

He thinks he's irredeemable so he might as well play the villain. He's not completely heartless, but why try being kind anymore when his role is fixed anyway? Phah! Nobody spares him, so why should he show mercy?

If people summon him they're asking for it + if he just stood there and let them kill him that would be unsatisfying for both parties.

He never learned how to deal with big complicated feelings except by lashing out.

By now the pattern of 'being summoned -> fight -> win or lose' is so deeply engraved into him he'd have to climb out of the groove, so he responds to any slight by competing.

He's so used to bloodshed he doesn't know how to have a normal conversation anymore.

I'm getting a better feel for him, but guess what: if characters live rent-free in your head you can put them in a terrarium of your choosing, but they will decide how to interact with it afterwards.

For example:

At this point I can't put Galacta Knight and King Dedede in a room together unsupervised because their massive egos make them bicker and posture at each other. (They're establishing pecking order/jealously trying to impress Meta Knight, who pretends not to notice. Bird rivalry go!) It would soon have them at each other's throats. They're surprisingly similar, but that also makes them absolutely allergic to each other. If you thought Dedede and Kirby had a rivalry, well, theirs is much worse. Kirby's perfectly happy to have a competition, but he's not (usually) interested in mocking his opponent, so that defuses the situation. But Galacta Knight's a sore loser and a smug winner. If DDD and GK ever do become friends it will grow out of a begrudging respect for each other's strength and the discovery they both like: a) Shitty puns, b) Sick Burns™ and c) Teasing Meta Knight.

On the other hand, after a rough start Galacta Knight and Kirby get along like a house on fire. Kirby's just not intimidated by him, so no matter what threats GK tries, he eventually has to accept he's being befriended. He has no choice. They beat each other up, make up, bake pancakes and have a sleepover. Yay! This does not stop him from being a bit of an untitled goose bastard. It just means Kirby's exempt from the worst.

He and Meta Knight are orbiting each other like binary stars trying to figure out why the other is definitely so much weirder and more unhinged.

MK: He tried to kill me on sight. I'm going to spare him to figure out why. Huh? He's so strong and beautiful! *Notices the serrated teeth and the unhinged seagull laugh.* Never mind.

GK: I am loath to gaze upon thy dim countenance, thou stupid anomalous manlet! Thou art short and ugly! I hate thee! ...I need to know more. Kiss me I mean I'll kill thee if thou touchest me!

He and Bandee are, uh, yeah. Strained is what I would call it. GK feels disdain for people weaker than him, but admiration for the dedicated. Bandee is both of those things. So he settles for giving him a lesson in stabbing more effectively. Bandee is just ??? the entire time.

They all help him fix different aspects of himself. Kirby offered him a non-judgmental outlet for his emotions. Meta Knight made sure he was physically healthy. Dedede, reluctant as they both were about it, helped ground him in reality and showed him change is possible. Bandee helped him re-evaluate his priorities and values.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

It's less that he's suddenly developed a conscience and more that he's finally getting the chance to see them as people. Normally he gets summoned and has to fight immediately. There's no time to chat, or sit down, or think about anything but battle. With every clash with a familiar face his opponents feel more like advanced training dummies than people. It's just another iteration, they don't matter. But this time he crashed in the jungle, then had to survive on his own for six days. Once the adrenaline wore off he started feeling things like pain, hunger and loneliness. He had to find food, he had to find shelter, he had to deal with (well, avoid) noncombatants. He started using his voice again, he had time to think and see things beyond the battlefield. He didn't know what to do with himself.

So by the time this Kirby and Meta Knight show up he's in a completely different mindset. Especially when they try to reason with him. When they heal him and feed him and even invite him over. You can't really sit down with someone over a nice cup of tea without starting to see them as a person. Someone with opinions, needs and desires and insecurities. Not so different from you. And the more you see them as a person, the more you care about them and the more difficult it becomes to want to kill them.

Too bad that doesn't mean his unresolved grief and anger issues are completely gone. It just means that if he lashes out and kills them now he will regret it. Forever.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

Post Hatoful Dreams GK cooking like Gordon Ramsey.

GK: *Slaps bread on MK/DMK's face* "What art thou?"

MK/DMK: "An idiot sandwich."

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

There's a war going on in his head between the touch-starved wet beast screaming "TOUCH ME! LOVE ME! HOLD ME! PLEEEASE!" and the vengeful side ready to kill and maim screaming "TRY ME. I DESPISE EVERYTHING ABOUT THEE, THOU FILTHY ITERATION OF MY NEMESIS!"

Now he finds himself in the middle, fickle and wishy-washy, craving affection, desperate to be accepted, but lashing out at any slight.

[talbaquix]

A layman's guide to olympic fencing—

for writers, artists, olympic fans, or the otherwise curious.

disclaimer: i say layman for a reason! i'm not at all a professional, or even good, but i have been fencing (very) recreationally at an amateur level for ~7 years. also, my exposure to sabre is extremely limited, and i am speaking from an american POV, so please feel free to correct me on any points you see necessary. :)

long post incoming...

So, what is "Olympic fencing?"

First and foremost, it is a sport. Not a fight, not a duel—a sport. One of five that have been permanent fixtures since the very first modern Olympic games, actually—hence the name! While other similar sword-wielding activities (such as historical European martial arts (HEMA), kendo, or wushu for example) may occasionally be referred to as "fencing," most people (me included) define fencing as this specific sport, and use other classifiers to categorize the rest.

Originally, fencing began as a form of military training in Germany and Italy, before spreading recreationally across more areas in Europe. Currently, the fencing scene is almost uncontestedly dominated by Italy, France, and Hungary, though both China/HK and the US have had some pretty stellar wins more recently.

In addition, French has a pretty large influence on fencing terminology and language, at least in the West. Be prepared!

The Basics

Three Weapons

Fencing is divided into three disciplines, each with their own equipment, strategies, and ruleset. They are as follows:

Épée: The classic. The heaviest and most defensive of the three blades, épée's simple ruleset allows for more elaborate strategy and really lives up to fencing's moniker of "physical chess." In épée, the entirety of your opponents body (including face, toes, etc!) counts as valid target area and all hits must be scored with the tip of the blade. In case of a double-touch (relatively simultaneous hits from both opponents), both opponents score points.

Because there's no need for specific target areas, épéeists enjoy minimal equipment, forgoing lamés (electric jackets, pronounced luh-may) and mask cords in exchange for a larger bell guard to protect the hand (that big bit of metal at the end of the blade). Épéeists can use pistol grips for more point control (molded to fit a hand), or a french grip to get a little bit of extra distance (red stick grip).

Épée bouts are stereotypically known for being slow and boring, since the absence of right-of-way (explained later) allows more freedom in trying to sus out opponent reactions and strategize, and the whole-body target + double-touch system means there's more benefit to fencing slowly in comparison to sabre or foil. It's not uncommon for épée bouts to begin with both fencers being carded for passivity! There's a lot of bouncing back and forth in the middle.

Saber (Sabre): Fast, slashing, and aggressive. The fencing you see in movies? Sabre. It's the only cutting weapon, where the entire length of the blade is able to register contact with the opponent. In sabre, the target area is the upper half of the body (including the face, but excluding the hand) and their lamés reflect that. Sabre also employs what is known as right-of-way/priority/advantage (from here on abbreviated as RoW) which, in the case of a double-touch, essentially gives RoW—and therefore the point—to the "aggressing" fencer at the referee's discretion. RoW is pretty complicated, but is very influential in how both sabre and foil play out.

In their ready (en garde) position, sabreists also hold their blade vertically to protect the face (as opposed to foil and épée, where the blade is held horizontally to keep the point towards the opponent). Sabreists also need special masks to register hits, as well as a mask cord to connect it to the rest of the electric circuit. Sabre bell guards are kinda swoopy and extend downward (think pirates) and are always "french grips" (aka just a stick).

Sabreists are generally known for being (respectfully) batshit insane and dramatic as hell. Bouts are extremely fast (rarely more than a few seconds) and look simple, and rely much more on pure athleticism and fast reaction times than épée. Most bouts consist of the two fencers running towards each other, maybe a parry or two, then both fencers scoring hits with a fair bit of screaming and angrily pointing at the ref. Oh wait, did I say running? Sorry, I meant advancing, since sabre is also the only discipline where crossing-over with your legs got banned because people just started sprinting towards the middle instead of actually fencing. Love them for that.

Foil (Fleuret, rarely): Oh, foil. The artistic middleman. Originating as a practice weapon, foil tends to sit in the middle of épée's careful point-control and elaborate strategy and sabre's split-second reactions and fuck-it-we-ball energy. Yet somehow, it ends up being more nit-picky and complicated than both. It has the smallest target area of the three, only covering the torso, as well as the lightest blade. Touches are only registered from the tip.

RoW's influence is noticeably large, since, compared to sabre, the longer bout times actually allow for opportunity for RoW to be traded between you and your opponent. Foil can almost be thought of as turn-based combat. Fencer A initiates the attack first, now has RoW, lunges and misses, which gives RoW to Fencer B. Fencer B attacks, gets parried (back to Fencer A), A extends, B counterattacks, A gets the point.

Foil stereotypes aren't as strong as épée or sabre stereotypes, but foilists are generally known for either being super pedantic and arguing w/ the ref about RoW or whipping their blade around constantly & being flowery (hence, "fleuret"). Because of how bendy the foil is, foilists can also do cool stuff like flicks (snapping your wrist so that the blade bends around, oftentimes to hit your opponents back) and can also get into pretty funny in-fighting situations a bit more often than sabre/épée (since corps-a-corps contact isn't allowed in fencing, and stepping back means you lose RoW, there's a lot of awkward up-close poking).

Some Positions

En garde: the basic fencing position. In essence, a squat, with one foot facing forward and the other turned out, roughly one and a half foot-lengths apart. This is the basis from which all other movements—the lunge, the advance, the retreat—should be executed, and the position fencers return to once an action is completed.

Lunge: the quintessential fencing attack. From en garde, extend your dominant arm, kick out your front foot, land forward, and extend your back arm for balance. To recover, bend your back leg and return to en garde.

Parry: the most basic piece of defensive bladework that every fencer learns, with the "beat" serving as its offensive counterpart. Consists of hitting your opponents blade to prevent a touch. There are nine different parries in classical fencing, but the most common (in foil/épée) are the four and six, which defend the inside and outside lines respectively.

Ettiquette & Other Fun Facts

All fencers must salute their opponent, referee, and audience (if there is one) before and after the bout. Usually just consists of "nodding" at the salutee with your blade before the mask is donned. At the end of bouts, a handshake with your opponent using your non-dominant hand is also expected. Many people substitute/add on to the handshake by tapping blades instead.

Unlike in tennis, seeing a fencer hold up a one on their hand after a touch is an acknowledgement of the opponent's point, whereas a closed fist is a claim of theirs.

When fencing without a ref, many people will slap their thigh to indicate the start of a bout.

Fencers may not speak while the mask is on.

Fencing clubs are also sometimes called salles.

While electrical equipment can vary between disciplines, all fencers are required to wear knickers, a plastron (under-arm protector), a body cord, a jacket, a glove, and a mask. For women, a plastic chest protector is also required. In sabre and foil, fencers also wear a mask cord and lamé.

The first safety rule most fencers learn is to never raise your blade towards someone without a mask on, and it's taken pretty seriously. Because the back of a mask is exposed, its also a big big no-no to turn your back to your opponent during a bout or otherwise lower your head.

Common Terminology

En garde, prez, allez! - On guard, ready, fence! Used to signal the start of a bout.

Halt! - Said by referees to. halt the bout.

Strip/piste - The surface on which fencers fence. Usually around 2m wide and 14m long, the lines on the piste also dictate where fencers must move to to begin bouts, and where they're considered out-of-bounds. Sometimes, they're on raised platforms. Yes, people have fallen off, yes, it's extremely funny.

Feint - Probably what you think it is.

Disengage - Moving your blade in a little circle to avoid contact with what is usually an incoming parry/beat. On a very basic level, straight attacks beat disengages, disengages beat parries, and parries beat straight attacks.

Fleche - An explosive running attack. Due to not being able to cross-over, sabreists use "flunges" instead, a mix between a fleche and a lunge that essentially entails flinging yourself at your opponent in a flying lunge.

Balestra - hop :)

Riposte - An immediate attack done after a defender's parry. Usually heard as "parry-riposte."

Tempo - A kind of nebulous concept, but very similar to the musical definition of the word. The pace of a bout, sorta. Often used when someone is advised to break tempo or if one fencer is controlling the tempo of a bout.

FAQ

Why are the blades bendy? To keep us from dying, mainly. What, you want the metal pole people can throw at each other at the same speed as a bullet (literally) to be solid? Also, blades break a lot already, especially in the hands of the inexperienced—they'd snap a hell of a lot more if they weren't flexible. Ouch.

Does it hurt? About as much as getting poked really hard with a steel stick would. Leaves bruises often, but cuts very rarely. You get used to it. The real kicker is staying in en garde for that long. Trust me, your quads will be screaming.

Is it- No, it's not dangerous. If you follow the rules, fencing is actually extremely safe, especially compared to contact sports.

Does a red light mean no touch? No. One fencer is assigned a red light that lights up whenever a touch is made, and the other is given green. In sabre and foil, yellow (sometimes white) means whatever the fencer hit was off-target, and should not be counted as a point. Épée doesn't have an off-target light, since épéeists don't wear lamés.

How do the masks know when a point is scored? Often asked upon seeing the little lights on the side of masks light up upon touches. Unless you're "dry fencing" (no electricity), you're typically hooked up to a circuit. If you fence épée or foil, there's a little button on the end of your blade that registers when pressure is added onto it. When a hit is scored, the signal goes through the wire in your blade, up your body cord, and eventually to "the box" (and your mask if you're fancy), and the corresponding light is flashed.

Why hold your hand behind your back? Most people don't! Some beginners do it to prevent themselves from reflexively moving their non-gloved hand in front of them when being attacked (which is against the rules), but most fencers either keep their hand relaxed at their side, raised in a t-rex pose, or occasionally above the head.

Helmet? Mask.

Sword? If you want.

Touché? Often "touche," actually. No accent.

Paralympics? On (stationary) wheelchairs. Extremely cool, actually, and very hard. Check it out!

Expensive? To get all your own stuff? Yes. But most clubs will rent you equipment, or sometimes lend it for free! But yes, more expensive than, like, soccer. :(.

Is it fun? Absolutely. To quote some random internet user, "it's like chess, at 90 miles an hour, oh and there's swords!" I would 100% recommend it to everyone, especially if you're on the older side (fencing isn't super age-restricted at all—seeing a 12 y/o and a 70 y/o facing off on a club piste isn't uncommon!) It is exhausting, exhilarating, and super, super fun. Give it a shot!

.

Please feel free to send any and all questions, corrections, or musings my way. Thanks for reading—I hope this was interesting and/or useful!

[notfleenz]

Was thinking about the tarot motifs/Danandphilcrafts essay earlier. Tarot-oriented people in my life irl are about evenly split between people who only do it recreationally, and people who are into the gnostic interpretation of the art of the old Waite(?) deck type cards.

That is to say, i'm aware that there's some level of further projection/extrapolation possible from what i'm about to say, but damned if i know whether it's appropriate.

but...yeah. Sisyphus. Phil's reaction to the story including the idea of telling stories kind of struck something, because he mentioned ages ago about having read and liked the Dark Materials (series)/Northern Lights (UK title)/Golden Compass (US title) books as a kid.

Because at least one telling of the Sisyphus myth has the harpies being the thing preventing that picnic at the bottom of the mountain, and in the last book of that series, the harpies are what impede the protagonists and their loved ones and eventual followers trying to pass through the world of the dead. The compromise reached when an exit is made, is that the harpies will guide the ghosts out to rejoin the universe, but have the right to demand the stories of the humans that they guide (with limited exceptions) for their sustenance. and to demand the truth of those who refuse to tell it.

Another part of the ending of the series is relating the telling of stories to human consciousness, and there's some exploration of morality without religious/pseudo-religious-style moralising, as such. which can be read as advocating for some of the less selfish forms expressions of love can take, and for the importance of individuals' behaviour in the building and improvement of their communities (worlds, in the framework of the books; building heaven where each person is, because keeping the worlds connected causes insurmountable problems, but keeping the connections they want in favour of an exit for the ghosts is deemed unconscionably selfish).

just for a moment, consider that point about love in terms of how this community talks about how the two of them relate to one another. and then how the point about communities relates to the ending of We're All Doomed.

Because Phil doesn't openly discuss philosophy per se as much as Dan, the fact he reached that conclusion of "telling [] stories" with the Game of Sisyphus is quite interesting, and in context of the earlier comments can seem like an endearing extension of a position adopted innocently as a much younger person. but if it is, the other aspects may imply that they have each come to similar positions about some features of how humans relate to the world and each other via very different paths.

[mylittleredgirl]

much more context with an episode list below the poll!

more info below by episode (forgive me in advance if i forgot your favorite doctor-evolution episode) (also forgive me for all the mistakes i will immediately see once i hit post but will be unable to fix because we can't edit poll posts):

season one: "i wasn't programmed for any of this!"

"eye of the needle": after kes starts advocating for him, janeway offers him the power to turn himself off, and he asks for a name.

"heroes and demons": he leaves sickbay for the first time and has his first non-medical mission. he's emotionally affected by freya's death at the end.

season two: "before you, i was just a projection of photons held together by forcefields [...] just a profession, not a life."

"projections": he hallucinates an existential crisis about whether he's a human or a hologram.

"twisted": the doctor spends time recreationally with the crew on the holodeck for the first time (though it's not clear if he enjoys it).

"lifesigns": he falls in love with vidiian doctor danara pel. at first he says his program is malfunctioning, but later believes his programming is adapting instead. he also records his first personal log.

season three: "i'm footloose and fancy-free."

"the swarm": his program starts to degrade because he has been expanding it for hobbies like opera and friendships with the crew. he says his program should be rebooted so he can serve his "primary responsibility," but kes and the others convince him that his memories are important to keep. (factoid: we learn his maximum runtime was supposed to be 1500 hours.)

"future's end": mobile emitter time!!! and his first time off the ship.

"darkling": he starts editing his own program (and it doesn't go well).

"real life": he creates a holo-family for himself.

according to the stardate mentioned in "latent image" (see season five), the flashback part of that episode happens at the very end of season three.

season four: "i believe i've earned the respect of the crew as an equal."

"revulsion": we meet our first delta quadrant hologram (and it doesn't go well). this is the first time we hear about holograms being subjugated by "organics."

"message in a bottle": the doctor meets the EMH-2 and reveals that at some point he programmed himself a dick and had sex.

"living witness": we learn that the doctor has a backup module who seems to have the same emotions and self-awareness as the doctor himself (which i take to mean that whatever sentience is now in his program can be duplicated by copying).

season five: "we gave him a soul. do we have any right to take it away now?"

"latent image": we learn the doctor had a holo-breakdown (off-screen in late season 3) after his ethical subroutines could not reconcile his decision to save harry's life over another patient's. at the time, they determined that erasing some of his memories was the only way to repair him. at the end of the episode, after the doctor and seven both argue for his individual rights, janeway decides to let him work through his guilt rather than deleting his memories again. assuming this ultimately works after the episode ends, it means that he was able to overcome a critical programming conflict through introspection and social support instead of altering his programming.

season six: "haven't I earned the right to self-determination?"

"tinker, tenor, doctor, spy": the doctor formally complains that his sentience is not being acknowledged and argues that he should be allowed to grow his abilities beyond his role as doctor. he also wants his potential to be evaluated based on his holographic nature rather than humanoid limits ("my program can be expanded indefinitely. i don't have limits!").

"blink of an eye": he lives for three years on the time dilation planet and even has a son ("it's a long story").

"virtuoso": he tries to leave the ship to become an opera star, choosing his passion (and his ego) over his originally programmed purpose.

side note: "fair haven" and "spirit folk" are both in season six, and that's the first time that anyone (including the doctor) seems to consider the concept that regular holodeck characters might also have some kind of feelings, personhood, or right to continued existence (unlike in season three, when in "alter ego" it's both a joke and a problem that harry falls in love with a hologram, or in "real life" when the doctor is fine with b'elanna reprogramming his family without consulting them).

season seven: "the doctor exhibits many of the traits we associate with a person [...] but are these traits real, or is the doctor merely programmed to simulate them?"

"critical care": the doctor violates the hippocratic oath in his programming by harming a patient to save others, and it does not trigger the ethical subroutine breakdown he experienced in season 5.

"body and soul": delta quadrant holograms are in revolt. the doctor experiences humanoid pleasures and enjoys them.

"flesh and blood": he betrays voyager to save the hirogen-programmed holograms and (temporarily) leaves the ship to join them, "because i'm one of you."

"author, author": a federation arbiter decides that he's not legally a person, but is "no ordinary hologram" and has some limited rights.

[omo-queer]

hi! tysm for your answer 🥺 i looked up "rapid desperation" online and based on my own understanding, this is how it works:

1. drink the same specific amount of water every 15 mins within an hour (you can pee within that 1 hour).

2. after that first hour, you should continue doing it but this time, the hold starts. bathrooms are not allowed.

after this, what shall i do next? do i just keep drinking until i can't hold it anymore? or should i set a goal (for example, wait for 2 hours until i can finally pee)?

thank you so much for helping a beginner out! 💗 also looking forward to more of your blogs

- 🩰

the rapid desperation approach i've seen and used a variant on myself is:

drink at least a glass (350ml/12oz or about that) every hour. this works best if you start this at least an hour or two before the hold, and pee as normal. this part basically gives your kidneys the heads-up that they're gonna be moving water fast bc you keep drinking it.

then do what you're implying—drink a glass every 15 minutes for a hour during which you can pee regularly

after that, you're holding. continue drinking at 15 minute intervals, and keep going until you lose control—the idea behind rapid desperation is that it makes this part go quickly because you've told your body to make pee faster, essentially.

this takes more planning than just like. not peeing for a long time. but it can get some interesting results. i would honestly recommend you try a couple regular holds before you go for rapid desperation, making sure not to go past the point of pain (discomfort is fine but pain you have to be careful about), because rapid desperation is one of the easier ways to have to worry about electrolyte balance (salt/potassium stuff) if you do it way too hard or way too fast. that said, i mentioned it because you were asking for specific challenges and it's a very fun one, just as long as you listen to your body.

remember, your safety comes before anything else—holding is good fun but it's important to learn what your body can and can't do, and to listen when it gives you signs to stop. you're very unlikely to hold so long you seriously hurt yourself, because the body usually gives up trying to hold it in before that's likely. but in rare cases you can experience water toxicity or overwork the muscles around your bladder if you go way too hard right out of the gate and don't listen to your body. try not to hold two days in a row when you're first starting out, and give yourself longer breaks of at least a few days between intense holds (where you actually lose control or get really close) to give your bladder and your muscles time to recover.

ok. that's the safety lecture over. it's not really that risky a kink, i just really wanted to stress how important listening to your body is when holding.

if you haven't done any holds yet, my first recommendation would be to drink liquids as normal, maybe slightly more than normal, and wait until they catch up to your bladder—eventually, if you keep drinking normally, you won't be able to hold any longer and will begin leaking or even wet yourself. even getting close to this is really thrilling. coffee/tea and other diuretics help get you more desperate, too. i typically wait until i'm right on the edge of wetting and then either go to the bathroom or (if i have the situation to) keep holding until i lose control. setting a timer that's a little overambitious usually also works for me because i tend to have a bit more bladder strength than i assume... but i've also been recreationally holding it for a pretty long time, all things considered.

thank you for reaching out! i hope my answers are helpful. i'm glad you enjoy my posts—might do a hold tomorrow or the next day or something, and it seems folks have been submitting anons for bladder control (which i love!!) so there will no doubt be more posts on the way.

i'll be asleep for a while once i post this, but feel free to send in any other questions you have via ask or dm! and of course, i always welcome talking about holds/experiences in my inbox!

[capitalwildcat]

Now, I am just saying words recreationally, but the last 2 episodes of The Magnus Protocol really have me in a specific mindset about the series and the friends I discuss with IRL are not caught up, so I'm just throwing my thoughts onto the wall here instead. I'll start at the most recent episode (24) and work my way through all my raving after. Obvious spoiler warning for under the cut. (For both TMA and TMP)

This is a long post.

Episode 24 - Monster Babies & Endings:

Celia's involvement in the support group seems to have a lot of people asking questions. Is her baby also a little changeling monster? It's unclear, but I had initially assumed (and still feel) that the support group was simply a support group for single mothers. As our unfortunate statement-giver points out, none of the other mothers seem to need bandages. There's clearly something wrong, but there's no reason to assume Celia knows what it is.

On the other hand, I'm inclined to agree with the folks who assume Gwen has started to formulate a sort of plan regarding the Externals and that she is putting up a huge front with Lena. As much as she doesn't seem to want to deal with the externals, she admits to Lena that she'd rather have the small amount of protection that Knowing might give her - even if it's not going to protect her That Much. I don't think she really wants the role, but she's not going to let herself be caught unaware. Alice, meanwhile, might be against Sam's plans to kick the Magnus- Archives-Brand-Hornet's-Nest, but it seems like she's either unaware of Gwen's new, somewhat dangerous plan, or else she thinks Gwen is more capable of handling herself (or that Gwen's avenue of research could protect them all, while Sams' might only doom them).

I especially appreciated the scene in this episode of Celia playing mediator between Sam & Alice. To me, Celia is the bridge between new audiences and old audiences. She appears to be from TMA's universe (more on that later), but she wasn't a "Main Character". She's also clearly not normal to TMP-only listeners, but she's been more understanding with Alice than Sam has, and she seems to be happy to pretend things are normal - despite her obvious and suspicious willingness to believe everything that she's told about the supernatural being real.

It's too soon to say whether she's "trustworthy" or not, but I feel like she's about as trustworthy as anyone else.

Jumping to the end of the episode- I think it's an interesting choice for Basira to call in "Mrs. Banks".

Deliberate reference or not (I obviously choose to believe it's deliberate), Oliver Banks was an avatar of the End. Even if they never expand on who Mrs Banks is, or confirm whether she's connected to the larger plot... that's not the point.

As an audience, we have reached an end point. There might be something in this graveyard for us to dig up, but we have to stop asking the Corpses where it is and start asking the Gravekeepers. (Ie- engage with the premise and setting where it is at, and do not expect a miraculous appearance from someone else we already know to give us All The Clues.)

I'm sure we will learn a lot from Sam & Celia's investigations, but the writing is nowhere near sloppy enough to put all the weight on their piece of the story.

I also got the feeling that this statement, in a way, reflects a bit of the fear that comes with creating a sequel - do you cannibalize the progenitor to satisfy the spawn? Whatever anxiety the writers had about creating something "new" and "perfect" has definitely manifested itself alongside the transmogrification & birth metaphors of the last 2 episodes. At least to me. It could be projection! It could be nothing! But I don't doubt that there's been a lot of pressure to follow up TMA with something really outstanding and I'm sure some of that has found its way into the work. (Writing is a self-portrait sometimes).

Expanding that thought - Perfection, Creation, and Alchemy:

It certainly feels a lot like episode 23 and episode 24 are a matched set.

There are plenty of themes of obsession and individual stories/statements about trying to attain a sort of personal perfection or divine creation or level of acclaim that ends up corrupting or destroying the participant/creator. (Everything with Ink5oul, for a start. Honestly, Gwen's ambitions to move up in the company, too.)

There is, frankly, no way the theme has been so prevalent by accident.

Alchemical symbols may have been convenient shorthand for the ARG, but I don't believe for a second that's all there was to it. Episode 19 gives us one example of this - the letter to Robert Boyle regarding Arbor Philosophorum Perfecta - aka. The Philosopher's tree. Obviously we can look at the episode as explaining the invocation of "The Protocol" (scorched earth), but more than that - it's a reminder that alchemy is concerned with study and refinement.

Refining elements to their purest forms, creating precious metals from base ingredients. Possibly creating 'externals' could be a type of alchemy, though I have less coherent thoughts on that. Given that we know Alchemy is not only present, but seems to have worked before the events that might tie together Protocol's universe with Archives'... we're not going to get far without considering The Homunculus. The idea of constructed or cobbled-together life-forms has been a recurring theme (from Episode One, Even) and I suspect we're going to get even more of that as we go on.

Fears, Externals, and Coincidence:

Not to reinvent Smirke's 14 here or try to impose a framework on a series that doesn't necessarily follow or need it, but I have a working theory that the multiple ocean-themed cases could be related. I've been referring to this thing in my head as "The Deep".

Mainly my suspicions are based on the story of the ship tattoo and the profound effect the ocean has on 'Gordon J' in in Episode 11 , the woman drowning on land in Episode 15, and possibly the coral in episode 23. Also potentially related, from episode 22: "I dreamed of an ocean, deep and unforgiving, with an unplumbed heart full of dark secrets waiting to be uncovered, whilst overhead flew radio signals, invisible and unknowable, not even rippling the surface".

These things don't necessarily connect at all, but the ocean motif does have me spinning my wheels.

Then there is the matter of [ERROR]. This isn't as well-thought-out of a category, but I did notice that when Gwen is compelled to speak in episode 21, her story involves finding a dead fox. Gee wouldn't that be odd, if someone had specifically mentioned a dead fox before? Oh, wait-

Episode 10, when Sam & Alice are exploring the institute (when the inadvertently release [Error], when discussing the smell of the place. "It's Manchester, so yeah, probably. Whether they’ll serve us when we smell like a dead fox is another matter…"

I just thought that was an interesting connection. Did Sam recognize the smell? Did he pick up on something? Was Gwen's story her story, or is it something that came from [ERROR] directly?

Character Sets: Gwen & Alice:

We've had a divide going for a while now, but this episode really managed to split our team into neat sections.

To me, Gwen and Alice are the "you don't have to listen to TMA" section of the podcast. Obviously the show would not work without them. (Also, I love them). They are experiencing these things for the first time.

Mr. Bonzo is a perfect representation of their part of the story. A familiar character from TV turns out to be a facade for a violent creature in ill fitting skin. Something, something, the loss of innocence. Something, something, the horror of realizing what you assumed was Safe is most assuredly Not. Something, something, Gwen's eagerness to take on this role and her immediate regret at finding the job entails bloody murder. The works.

I'm extremely excited to see what Alice and Gwen plan to do, now that they've agreed that the Externals are a danger. It seems like Gwen asking for another opportunity to be the externals liason (and taking a modicum of protection over complete ignorance) is a step towards really figuring out why the OIAR is working with these things, how they started... all things that are completely divorced from what returning TMA audiences could really know.

Character Sets: Celia & Sam

Celia and Sam are the characters whose story will likely appeal more readily to people who have listened to all of TMA.

First of All: Celia is almost definitely from TMA's universe.

She recognizes Chester's Voice

She appears to have knowledge of Smirke's 14, which makes sense given her time in the apocalypse

She would have met Helen, and while I believe she was taken before Basira's arrival, Melanie seemed to get on well with Basira, so it makes sense she would have told the others about her.

It explains why Celia knows, without real confirmation or in-universe backup, the names Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood.

It may also explain why she knows this universe's version of Georgie. If I were pulled out of my own personal hell, I would also seek out my heroes' counterparts in an alternate dimension (Not sure if she's tried to contact Melanie and failed, or if we're just not there yet)

While she would not have known Gertrude or Gerry, she and Sam didn't seek them out on her prompting - they looked for Gerry based on records from the institute that "John" mailed to Sam.

"Complicated immigration status"

Now, Celia, to me, is a perfect bridge character. First of all, because she has just enough information about the universe of the previous series to keep people who are familiar with it from getting too antsy. She also wasn't a main cast-member, which means that she doesn't have so much information that Protocol-only audiences can't possibly understand her, nor was she so important that Archive-listeners know everything about her.

She also has her own unique plot going on that we can't really infer from just listening to TMA. It's going to have to be handled in universe.

Her exhaustion could be related to a monster baby, sure, if that's really what is happening with the support group. However, it seems like she's been waking up in areas that she doesn't remember traveling to, more than anything.

This is exciting, because it opens up a lot of possibilities.

Sleepwalking

Involuntary Teleportation

Possibly (and this is my favorite so far) sharing a body with the Protocol version of Celia. This could be related to the statement in episode 22 that shows us multiple souls in 1 body could be possible.

Then we come to Samama Khalid. My dear Sam.

His complicated relationship with Alice is reason enough for him to react badly to her perceived interference - he already knows she's a bit jealous, and she's always very contrary, and she fiddled with his computer behind his back. As far as Sam is concerned, Alice is meddling because she doesn't think he can handle things himself. Celia's mediating between them is welcome and appreciated, and it cuts through their arguing very neatly to keep the story progressing. Now is not the time for Sam & Alice's relationship drama to derail our investigations.

I also know a lot of folks were put off by Sam's reaction to Gwen re: Mr. Bonzo, but let's be completely honest: If someone got really dramatic about monsters and then told you that like... Count Von Count from the muppets was the monster they meant, you'd laugh too. Not to mention that Sam is used to Alice messing with him. He dismisses her, but it's a completely sensible and human reaction.

And yes, his obsession with the institute is definitely blinding him to some of the other goings-on at the O.I.A.R., but he doesn't need to fill that role. He has a vested interest in a very different piece of the puzzle than Gwen and Alice. Sam is also the only person so far that we know for certain has been contacted by both "John", and the Response Department (that isn't supposed to exist).

Honestly I'm more excited at the moment to learn about the response department than I am to learn about what might be going on with the institute, but I will not lie to you - I anticipate hearing news eventually about Jmart and co. I just don't expect it to be good news.

Series Notes - Connected Universes (Welling Mutare Materia Research Program):

Speaking of Jmart. Let's hop to episode 17.

This case is the first real confirmation of dimension hopping in Protocol. Our ex-con was going to court-mandated anger management therapy. Shockingly, at the same place where we had (what most people assume) our Alternate Universe John and Martin in the waiting room.

He goes into the Dr's office. He meditates. Then he is gone. When he comes-to, the office is dark and he is exhausted, emaciated, dehydrated, in pain, and his legs aren't working well... I'm not a doctor, but I'm pretty sure this is when he is transported not just through time, but also realities.

He even makes a point to mention seeking out people he knew in his life prior, but they don't seem to know him or recognize him.

[Celia actually responds to this case with a "Thanks, but it's not exactly the same, is it" (I might be biased but I count that as a win for 'Celia is from TMA' bingo).]

There is a similar discovery of a body in episode 18, though the woman is deceased when she is found, and gives her "statement" posthumously ("I wander lonely. I wander lonely. I will die in this place. And no-one will miss me.") I interpreted this to mean that she was present in a domain of the lonely in the TMA universe during the apocalypse and appeared in this universe before succumbing to her exhaustion, starvation, etc.

Anyway. The statement is only part of what is interesting here. In the report itself, the subject is ranked for viability as subject, agent, and catalyst. These categories appear in other places too - like episode 9, about the dice that change fortune.

The part that gets me, of course, is the Welling Mutare Materia Research Program. The Dr Welling in question is mentioned in episode 21, which I will get to now.

Series Notes - Connected Universes (The Dome):

Episode 21 gives a lot of information that I think is very crucial. First of all, we have the Millenium Dome as a site, and the concept of "Universal Transmutation".

1) Obviously whatever plans were in place, it is no accident that the institute was burnt down in December 1999 when the launch of this project was anticipated to be in 2000. (At Dr. Welling's suggestion, given the turn of the century's psychological impact)

2) The concept of Loci. Ie "in the process of developing into a locus without our intervention".

It is unclear whether a locus is more akin to Hilltop Road, or to The Panopticon, but I'm guessing whatever it is will be closer to the latter. The "hungry architecture" structure discussed in episode 8 may also be developing into a locus, along with the Oxford outreach center of the institute (Episode 17 & possibly 18's subjects appeared there)

3) Of course, the mention of incorporating the dome into a "grand ritual" is noteworthy, though it is unclear whether this was intended to call down an entity, or several entities, or to transform existing parts of the world into something else.

4) The Millenium Dome was a real project in the UK, and the dome was originally conceived of as being split into 14 sections (some folks already pointed this out and how fun that knowledge is when you consider Smirke's 14. If nothing else, it is a fun coincidence.)

5)The doppelganger of a worker pulls his double into the earth. I want to bold this, underline it, and highlight it. This is another confirmation of "selves from alternate realities", and at minimum is a 2rd example of someone's double appearing from another world.

Series Notes: Tie-ins & Foreshadowing

Finally, I'm going to wrap up this rambling string of thoughts with this: I refuse to believe that the Very First Statement in protocol isn't relevant.

"I just couldn’t face the thought of the rest of my life never hearing him again, I had to try"

(Did hearing that in Martin's Voice hurt my heart? Very much so)

But beyond that, this piece stuck out to me.

"Arthur? Is that you?

And that voice I have loved for twenty years answered:

Some of him".

First of all, the statement feeds into later themes of obsession and blah blah blah. But it also, crucially, encapsulates the idea that even the things we love and recognize- the things we'd do anything to see again- are likely going to be so irrevocably changed in this story that we might regret wishing for it. I take this as a warning to the audience. Listen at your own risk.

It also could give us a hint into the existence of [ERROR], with it's many eyes and its tape recorders. There was some speculation that it might be a monstrous version of John, or Elias, or even Sasha. But I think that, most likely, it's not any single one of those things.

If some part of John (or any of our characters) is in there, I wouldn't be surprised, but that's just it- some part. "Some of him". Back to my homunculus rambling from earlier (and my obvious graveyard simile) this could be an in-universe example of someone digging up the past (literally) and trying to bring it into this world.

ANYWAY

That's it for now I just really, really, really had to get this all out of my system. Thanks.

[yanderu-deredere]

Can I get a uhhhhhhh..... Ryouta and his darling having sex under influence? In his profile you mentioned that it's one of his kinks. Maybe a scenario where they share a joint, darling is a giggly and relaxed mess and Ryouta can't help feeling frisky.

a/n: I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD ASK FOR THIS hehehe of course you can! i was literally kicking my feet and giggling when i saw this ask come in!

warning: recreational marijuana use written by someone who does not recreationally use marijuana LOL, dub-con? kind of, gender neutral reader but there is mention of an entrance

ryouta watanabe ★ profile

Honestly, you didn't know how you got roped into this.

One moment, it felt like you were just curiously asking Ryouta why he smelled weird sometimes. The next moment, you were on Ryouta's couch, the two of you pressed a bit too closely against each other.

You watched curiously as he pulled out a weird device. He stuffed what you assumed was marijuana and then spun a little thing on the side before putting a piece of thin paper into it and rolling the thing on the side again.

Suddenly, out popped a joint.

"I'm shit at rolling by myself so I have that." He answered easily enough, something between a smile and a smirk playing across his lips.

You nodded eagerly, eyeing the joint he know held in his hands both curiously and cautiously. It was glaringly obvious that you'd never smoked before, even if you hadn't told him.

"Here, why don't you light it for me, darling?" Ryouta glanced at the rather fancy dragon themed golden lighter that was way closer to you than him.

You nodded again and grabbed it. Unlike most lighters, it was easy to press down and, when you did, the fancy dragon head at the top let out a little flame.

Ryouta held the joint between his lips and leaned over, holding the tip of it over the fire. You couldn't help but flush a little when you noticed how close it made him.

When the thing was sufficiently lit, he leaned back but not before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you impossibly closer.

At this point, you were half in his lap! And that thought just made you feel even more flustered.

"You want to try?" He offered as he pulled the joint away with two fingers and you watched as a trail of smoke followed after it.

You were a little mesmerised by the whole thing (and surprised by how handsome it made Ryouta) but you still felt a bit hesitant.

Ryouta seemed to immediately notice this because he just smiled at you easily "Bit intimidating?"

You felt a little like a bobble head with the way you kept nodding at him, the words you wanted to say not exactly forming right in your mind.

"This is pretty strong." He flicked the join a little before taking a quick hit "Why don't I show you a fun way to smoke it? Something that won't be as bad."

You fidgeted a little with the lighter in your hand, not exactly lighting it but just turning it over and over in your head. Hesitantly, you decided to acquiesce "How?"

"Just inhale."

You opened your mouth to ask for clarification just as he took what seemed like a longer hit. Before the words could leave your mouth, however, he leaned close, his lips ghosting over yours, and he blew the air straight into your mouth.

Your brain seemed to short-circuit but, almost automatically, you inhaled just like he said.

"Good darling."

It might've been his words or, maybe, it might've been from how you'd quickly sucked the smoke in but you coughed, head reeling and your mind feeling a little light.

In your coughing fit, you didn't notice how Ryouta's fingers started sneaking up your top or how he started rubbing circles into your skin.

All you could focus on was the rather dizzying feeling taking over you and the way Ryouta chuckled, all deep and smooth.

Oddly enough, you couldn't help but join him, your giggles chirpy and bubbly.

"Take it slowly." He advised you and, before you could say anything to that, he was taking another large toke.

This time, you were ready. You looked eager to please as your lips parted for him. You breathed in slow but deep. That lightheaded feeling returned two-fold but you couldn't find it in yourself to hate it.

Just looking at you, so pliant and obedient, made Ryouta hard in his jeans.

You leaned into him this time, your shoulders bumping against each other's and your cheek practically pressed against his "This feels good."

Then, you giggled at your words as if they were the funniest thing you'd ever heard in your life.

Ryouta nodded, an idea slowly forming in his head as his hand travelled from your hip forward to your bare stomach, his fingers ghosting over you in a way that both felt soothing and ticklish.

"I could make you feel even better, you know." He mentioned off-handedly.

His words made you perk up a little "Uhh-huh, how?"

"You want me to make you feel good, darling?" He asked before taking another long toke of the joint.

Your lips easily parted for him like the two of you had been shotgunning for years and the eager way you kept taking it from him only strengthened Ryouta's resolve.

He pulled you flush against him and you giggled as you shifted, your entire body now sideways in his lap. It surprised him how much he loved the feel of you like that, how you fit almost like a puzzle piece in his arms.

His head swam a little, though he didn't know if that was you or the weed. Sometimes, being with you felt like a high and it was the kind he thought he'd never get enough of.

Your soft fingers pressed against his cheek, pulling him out of his thoughts. You giggled again and, like a sixth sense, he knew what you wanted. Ryouta took another large inhale, breathing it out right into your parted lips.

Unlike before, though, he didn't immediately pull away. Instead, he put the joint down on an ashtray and pressed his lips firmly against yours in a rather messy kiss.

You returned it easily, your grip on him loose like you couldn't exactly control your body. In fact, your arm just laid across your shoulder, the other arm limply wrapping around his neck.

Ryouta's hand at your stomach dipped under the band of your bottoms and underneath your underwear, fingers easily finding your entrance.

Without hesitance, he started to work you open, fingers pressing slowly deeper and deeper into you. It made you gasp into the kiss and, almost immediately, he used it as an opportunity to slip his tongue in.

Before, your felt lightheaded. Now, though, this was an entirely different thing all together. Ryouta's every touch felt like it tingled and his kiss felt like it was making your mind swim. You couldn't focus on a single thought. All you could do was revel in his touch.

That was just amplified two fold as he fed finger after finger into you, two of them scissoring inside you, pressing against the parts of you that made you keen.

"That's it, darling. Good, good." He pulled away from the kiss far enough to mutter against your lips, watching as your eyes, pupils blown and gaze uncertain, seemed to roll into your head.

Ryouta rut his hips against your thigh, lips moving from yours to your neck, leaving searing biting kisses there.

Before long, your pliant soft body curved, stiffening as the most earth-shattering orgasm wracked over you.

You seemed to twitch from it's after-effects and all Ryouta could do was watch you, cock hard in his jeans and eager to see you do that again and again.

Without taking his fingers out of you, he used his free hand to pick up the joint again. I mean, a few more of those wouldn't hurt, right?