#i'm checking his shit out and damn i vibe with this

[thewhizzyhead]

okay but mico's music aka epic telemachus is like really fuckin good tho

[rafesslxt]

Showerhead | mattheo riddle

summary: you thought you were alone in the bathroom when your wild thoughts took over you but you suddenly hear a second voice.. and its not inside your head.

warnings: masturbating for a sec, cursing, filthy DIRTY TALK, fingering, mattheo eating out reader, unprotected p in v, enemyxlover vibe, gryffindor!reader

notes: DAMN I'M BACK! I'm sorry but I had a HUGE writing block. Also: english is not my first language so pls let me know If there'S something I can correct :)

My day was unbelievable fucked. I woke up too late, got detention because i talked to my friends while Snape was teaching us something, i spilled my food over my clothes.. twice.. after that I fell from my broomstick at the quidditch training and now i sat with Hermione, Ron and Harry in the Great Hall eating.

„Yo y/n can I copy your homework later? I got -" Ron startet but i interrupted him "Yeah yeah whatever.. guys I‘m gonna go to bed okay? See you after this." Hermione and me shared a room so I would see her later.

I rushed to our dorm, getting rid of my dirty clothes. God I needed a shower, now. I took my clothes, shower stuff and towels and started to walk towards one of the big bathrooms.

Because I wanted more privacy, I did go to one that not many students know about. Hermione once told me about it as she talked about Hogwarts in first grade.

As I walked inside, I checked If someone‘s here but I was alone. I took off my clothes and stood under one of the showers more in the corner and let the water run down my body. I sighed as I felt it on my skin, finally feeling more relaxed.

My thoughts started drifting after a while as my hands glided over my body. Damn my muscles are really sore. When was even the last time I had sex? I think it was like 3 months ago with a guy from Ravenclaw. He looked promising but merlin was I feeling disappointed after.

I couldn‘t even touch myself cause I was always around people, sharing rooms together and shit.

I bit my lip as I looked at that shower head above me. Nah I couldn‘t.. could I? Did I even have time? I mean I was in here already for like 20 minutes so I had to be in my room before curfew but god damn I was so desperate.

Oh fuck it – what is one more detention, right? I took the shower head, letting my other hand slowling wandering over my nipples. I whimpered slightly at the feeling, realising now how desperate I really was.

I took the shower head and put it where I needed it the most. My thoughts drifted again and I tried to think about someone but no face appeared until - fuck no, I can‘t think about him.. but before I could debate more with myself, his name left my lips.

"Fuck Mattheo.." my lips parted and my breathing got heavier. Merlin was I already about to cum? How pathetic, I didn‘t even touch myself properly but that kind of didn‘t matter as the next words left my mouth. "Shit.. please" i begged into the foggy air around me.

"Damn Princess.." My blood got cold and my body tensed to a point where I couldn‘t move. I swallowed as I opened my eyes and saw Mattheo Riddle standing right in front of me. The one who‘s name I just moaned.

I tried to hide my body behind my hands, a little too late. "Fuck Riddle what the hell are you doing here?!" I asked him angry. Once because I stood there completley naked and he didn‘t even tried not to look and second for my again – non existing orgasm.

He looked shamelessly over my body, scanning every inch of my skin. He had a towel hanging low on his hips, which didnt really helped the state i was in right now.

" I could ask you the same but I think I just heard what you did.." he smirked arrogant and looked at my face. "You know you could have just asked If you wanted my help."

I rolled my eyes at him as I took one of my towels from the side to hide my body but as I did I had to let go which leaded him to look at my breasts. I saw him licking his lips, looking up at my face again as I wrapped the towel around myself.

"Just because your name is Mattheo, doesn‘t mean I was thinking about you."

He grinned again, coming closer to me slowly. "Oh yeah? Then who did you mean?" I tried to think about an different Mattheo but there was no one in this school I knew with that name – besides him.

He just stood one inch away from me now, backing me into the shower again until my back hit the wall.

"Princess.. i know you did think about me, there‘s no shame in telling." I started nibbling on my bottom lip as a signal to being nervous. God he smelled so good and his face looked even more handsome now that the single drops of water fell onto his face from his still wet hair.

"And what If I was? Are you going to tell all your stupid little friends?" He chuckled "No.." his face came even closer now "just let me help you out with that." I swallowed down a clump in my troath as he said that. My pride was way too big for him to just come here and fuck me like that..right?

"Hell no I -" "Why not huh? I saw how desperate your little body looked as you just begged for more.. let me help you with that, I‘m gonna make you cum within the first minutes." Now his arrogant smile was back, his breath hitting my lips now.

"Yeah all of you boys say that, leaving me unsatisfied after." I huffed, looking away from his piercing eyes.

"Let‘s make a deal little one.. I‘m gonna eat you out and If I don‘t make you cum within the, lets say: five minutes? I‘ll leave and never bother you again.."

I looked at his lips while he was talking. They looked so soft and kissable – fuck was I really considering what he said? I mean he‘s a Riddle and a stupid little fucker but maybe that‘s just what I needed right now. Stupid little Fucker named Mattheo Riddle.

"And what If you make me cum?" i looked up at his eyes again. He towered his head over mine grinning, coming down to my ear and whispered "..then you‘re mine for the night." He smiled almost devilish and I know I should‘ve said no but damn 3 months were starting to get the best of me.

"Deal." It felt like as If I just signed up for the devil. His smile grew at my words and he pushed me against the wall this time, unwrapping the towel i just put on.

"Damn your body looks so good, just perfect for me to eat." Shivers went down my spine at his words right towards my - " I hope you know what you just got yourself into." Suddenly he took me by my hips, lifting me up against the wall again as I wrapped my legs around his hips.

"It‘s kind of unfair that you still have your towel on, don‘t you think?“ "Oh don‘t worry princess, it‘s coming off very soon."

He took one hand away from supporting my ass, to my cheek. He looked deep into my eyes, almost staring into my soul. He closed the gap between us, kissing me like no boy ever did before in my whole life. The kiss was passionate, heated and longing. Almost as If we would seperate, we couldn‘t breathe.

I felt the tip of his tounge slide over my bottom lip which made me moan slightly. He smiled against my lips and pressed himself harder against me.

I opened my mouth slowly, which he took as a opportunity to explore my mouth with his tounge fighting over control with mine.

He let go of my lips what almost costed me a whimper but I pressed my lips together. He took me by my hips again, lifting me higher until I sat on his shoulders, my eyes going wide. Damn I don‘t think I need 5 minutes.

"You ready?" he mumbled against my inner tight he started kissing softly with his wet lips. I just let out a deep breathe and nodded, putting my hands on his hair.

He started kissing higher up until his mouth was just an inch away from my pussy. "5 Minutes are alredy starting" I chocked out, but in reality I just wanted him so start.

I could feel him grinning like an little ass but these thoughts were thrown out of the window as his tounge touched my clit.

I held in my breathe for a second as he started to kitten lick my clit and massaging my tights with his hands. I buckled against his face but he was faster and backed away. I let out a desperate whine at the loss of contact.

"Beg me.." he told me looking up at me with his chocolate brown eyes. Shit who was I even to deny that? Now wasn‘t really the moment for too much pride. "Please.." He raised his eyebrows " Please what?" "Please eat me out Mattheo, I need it - please.."

Satisfied with my answer he licked flat over my pussy, focusing on my clit again as he started to suck it. "Oh my-" my lips parted and my hands flew into his hair again, pressing his face deeper between my legs.

"Fuck that feels good" i moaned and arched my back off the wall as I felt something deep down in my stomach. Shit he didn‘t even do much but give my clit some attention - really good attention - and I was already close again.

I felt his hand going under my tight and his thumb being places on my clit. He moved his finger in circular motions, sliding his tounge to by entrance, fucking me with it.

"M-mattheo please!“ shamelessly i bucked my hips and cried out his name.

"You close baby?" he asked, mumbling against my wet skin. I just nodded breathless until I felt a sharp and powerful feeling in my abdomen.

It completely crushed me. Everything around me went black for a few seconds and I couldnt hear anything. I just came so hard on Mattheo‘s tounge that I didn‘t even realise where I was for a short moment.

I looked down on me, looking in Mattheo‘s eyes, already looking at me. "You taste so good baby."

He slowly lets me down again but holds me as we both notice how weak my knees are. "Damn I didnt expect that.." i breathe out and look at his lips, still glistening from my juices.

"I think you lost our deal.." he grinned and startet slowly kissing my neck. I chuckle, nodding just slowly, thinking about how much I actually want him and not caring about the fact that I lost.

"..but you don‘t really seem to care huh." he grins and slowly rubs my back before turning me around so I faced the wall. "Hands on the wall baby." No matter what he said, I always heard him smiling. Smug little ass. "Spread your legs princess, that's it.. wider." My stomach twisted at his vulgar words, never ever did a boy talk to me like that.

I did as he said, spread my legs even wider while my hands touched the cold wall. "Hmm now arch your back for me."

I felt his hands slither around my waist down to my lover stomach. Every touch of his send shivers down my spine. Suddenly, I felt his breath against my ear, his lips kissing the shell of it as he murmurs with a deep voice. "I'm going to fuck every last thought out of this pretty little head." "Stop teasing me and do it!"

He chuckles darkly and I feel the tips of his fingers wandering slowly over my pussy. "Do you really think you're in a position to give orders?" Goosebumps.

As I didn't answer him he lightly brushed his finger over my clit, making me shiver again, while brushing soft kisses across my back.

"Please." I let out a whimper, arching my back just a little more and pushing my hips into his body. Then, I felt him at my entrance, pressing the tip of his cock against my clit, just where his fingers had been a second ago.

"Beg. Fucking let me hear how much you want this cock." he whispers into my ear, his hot breath hitting my ear. My whole body shudders and I can't help it but do as he tells me to.

"Mattheo please I need you. I need to feel you, I'll do anything." I feel myself almost crying from the frustration and arousal. "Good Girl." he groans before he slowly enters me. Fuck.

"Oh Shit baby, you feel so tight." Mattheo grunted shamelessly as my walls clenched around him. My breathing got heavy and I bite my bottom lip to hide my moans.

"Don't hold back." he commands and just so, I let my lip go and whimper out his name.

"Hmm just like that princess." He pushes further inside of me, groaning at the feeling. I feel so full of him, I can't think straight besides of him and how good he feels.

Abruptly he started moving his hips fast an hard against my ass, leaving my mouth hanging wide open. " Oh fuck, Mattheo!" I cried out at the sensation. His hand started to wander up and down my body, over my back, my stomach, my tits - playing with my nipples.

"What, you want gentle? Wrong fucking address." God where has he been all these months? It feels like he just fills that hole inside of me - literally.

I hear him panting behind me, not slowing down with the movement of his hips. "Shit I would've fucked you way sooner If knew you had such a tight little pussy, just waiting for me to come and fuck it sore."

I hiss as he takes my hair into his fist and yanks my head backwards so It would lay against his shoulder while my back is still arched and he presses me against him. My hands roam over his arm that holds me in the middle of my body and I close my eyes. I'm definitely gonna be sore tomorrow.

I felt him changing the angle of his hips a little and my eyes almost bulged out of my head. "Oh my god!" I almost scream, forgetting that someone could hear us, even tho not many know about this bathroom. "Fuck yes, I feel you clenching around me princess. Does that feel good hm?" he teases and bites my neck gently.

Words coiled inside my throat, coming out as broken sobs, telling him I'm wanting more. "You're still holding back, just let go."

So I screamed his name again, over and over again, until I felt a sharp pang in my stomach. His hand let go of my body, his second hand still in my hair. He grabbed the shower head and turned the pressure higher before he holded it right against my clit.

I was a whimpering and sobbing mess at this point, begging him to let me come. "Look at me. I wanna see you coming around my cock." He tugs at my hair and my eyes roll back to look into his, which gave me the rest I just needed to come.

Looking into his eyes made my walls clench around him again, leaving his mouth hanging wide open. "Shit.." he grunted and closed his eyes as his rhythm became more erratic. Just as I slowly came down from my high, I felt him pulling out of me and coming all over my back, spreading his hot cum.

"Fucking hell.." he breathed out and slowly let go of my hair and hanging the shower head back onto the wall after washing his cum off of my back. I turned around and looked up at him, smiling slightly.

"What? Did I fuck out all your negative energy?" he chuckled, pressing me against him again with one of his arms. I roll my eyes at his comment but still I couldn't hide my smile. "I have something for you.." he said, now he's smiling like a little devil.

I look at him confused which he answers me with his fingers in front of my mouth. I look down at them and gasp as I see his cum on them. "Come on, open up baby.." I didn't knew why but again I did as he said and parted my lips. He pushed his fingers inside my mouth and grins. "Suck them."

I started sucking on his fingers and swirling my tongue around them, tasting his salty cum. His eyes rolled back a little and I saw him shuddering for a moment. "Damn, you wanna suck my cock maybe?"

I did let go of them and chuckled as I pressed myself pass his body to wrap my towel around my wet body. " Maybe next time.."

"Oh so you wanna do this more often, huh?"

Oh and how we both didn't knew at that moment how often actually.

_______

Who wants a part 2? It's here!

Let me know how you liked it!

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xoxo Sarah <3

[sheeple]

Okay so is this kinda inspired by my own wishfull thinking? Yes absolutely. Do I give a damn? Absolutely not. Warnings? Age gap (reader 23/John 35) / Reader lives at home / kinda rushed because I want it out of my system :)

Ever since covid you and your friend had a Tinder Night every two weeks, to help you with your never-ending singleness. And when she moved across the country to move in with her boyfriend, the Tinder Nights got digital. And by now you've also broadened your horizon to Hinge.

But one evening bored out of your mind by the selection of boys, your friend — plus her boyfriend who tries not to be invested but is failing very badly — and you decide to up the age to 30 to 40, for shits and gigs of course.

And after an evening of swiping and giggling about the creepy dudes who put their minimum age to at least 23, you kinda forget to put the age back to your five-year rule. Until you get a notification of Hinge a couple of nights later.

John has liked your photo! Match to continue the conversation.

You hesitate at first. From the small picture, the notif gives you you can see that the guy isn't 25 of something. Opening the app, you scroll through his profile.

He's... handsome. You're not going to deny that with short brown hair and a pretty mighty moustache and beard, he kinda gives you puppy vibes as his eyes radiate kindness.

His profile says he's 35 and in the army. Pretty tall too. And his prompts are pretty hilarious too. At least... you think so.

You send a screenshot to your friend of his answer to:

I'm totally obsessed with: Sleeping in a freshly washed bed.

You: Oh he's... like ADULT adult Your friend: That answer comes across as if he is going to give you tips about the airfryer

And against your better judgement... you match with him.

The conversation is awkward at first (from your side at least) but slowly and surely you start to warm up. His jokes are horrible and dad-jokey but make you smile anytime he sends them. He's the first person you text and the last one from whom you check if you have a message before going to sleep.

After a week he asks you out to dinner. He wants to meet you and see if you match each other in real life. And you agree.

So that Friday, after work, you get all dolled up and you ask your mother to drop you off so you can drink a cocktail or two and don't have to worry about driving.

When you walk into the restaurant your breath hitches. There he is, waiting patiently for you. He's wearing a simple white button-up with the sleeves rolled up his arms and dark slacks. Effortlessly handsome.

John rises from his seat when you approach and hugs you, a wide smile on his face. He pulls the chair out for you, like the gentleman he is, and asks about your day.

To your surprise, this is the first date you truly enjoy. John is attentive and seems to really pay attention to you and what you say. He asks about you, your job, and your life. Of course, you do the same. he's a very interesting man and his job is just amazing. He explains he's a captain in the British Army but that he's on desk duty until his injury from his last deployment has healed. He can't say a lot about his job as a Captain, but what he tells you sounds all so brave.

Without even realising hours have passed and the restaurant staff is not so subtly urging you to pay and go home. You want to grab your purse to split the bill. But John gives you a stern look and pays instead.

"You really didn't need to do that", you say as he drives you home, feeling kinda guilty that he paid the bill.

John gives you the same look as before. "Darling, my mother raised me right. And she would give me a stern talking to if she knew I would let a lady pay on the first date."

"Fine", you huff, "but next time I pay!"

"Next time huh?" He gives you a cheeky smile.

You feel your face heat up and choose to say nothing, opting to look out of the window.

John stops in front of your house and gets out to open the car door for you. He walks you to the front door and you hesitate for a moment with the key in your hand.

"I would love to invite you in for tea but..."

He nods understanding. "But you have roommates that are probably asleep by now. I get it."

Pursing your lips, you embarrassingly scratch the back of your neck. "No... I still live with my parents."

John's eyes widen with shock for a second before he masks it. "Ah. I see."

This is it, you think, I've blown it.

"It's a bit too early to meet the parents, isn't it?", he jokes and you let out a sigh of relief. You nod in agreement, a smile forming on your face.

Standing up on your tippy toes, you press a kiss against John's cheek. His beard prickles your lips but you don't mind it.

"Thanks for tonight. And thanks you for driving me home", you smile softly. "Text me when you get home safely?"

John nods and you wait before entering your home until John's driven away. Once inside you sigh deeply.

How are you going to explain to your parents that you're dating a guy who's seriously twelve years older than you?!

second part

[punkshort]

Swept Away | Chapter 4: Tropical Heat

Pairing: sugardaddy!Joel Miller x f!reader

Chapter Summary: The first day on Glenn's yacht is much more dramatic than you originally expect.

Chapter Warnings: language, slow burn, sugar daddy/baby vibes, food and alcohol consumption, intoxication, reader gets drunk and snippy, mentions of past infidelity, flirting, sexual tension, jealousy, one tiny daddy reference, nausea/vomiting, joel gets mean but he makes up for it (he sucks at feelings)

WC: 8.5K

Series Masterlist

"I'm so excited for tomorrow. Glenn's yacht is supposed to be massive. Like, full crew, multiple levels. The type you'd usually charter but he actually owns it." Zoe sighed dreamily next to you at the hotel salon. You were listening but your eyes were pinned on your nails, watching as the technician managed to make your hands look like they were out of a catalogue in less than an hour.

"Yeah, that - it sounds really cool," you replied. "Should be fun. Joel said there's some tiny islands we might check out or something."

Zoe nodded excitedly. "Zach said there's one called Monu Island. We're supposed to have dinner there the first night."

"Dinner? How?" you asked. She looked at you like you had two heads.

"The crew brings the stuff to shore for us and cooks?" she said as if she were explaining how to ride a bike. Shit. You probably should have known something like that if you were pretending to be in the upper, upper class.

"Oh, yeah, I knew that," you said with a nervous laugh, "I meant how are they going to get us off that yacht? The more I keep hearing about it, the harder it's going to be to pull me away from it."

Zoe giggled and you inwardly breathed a sigh of relief.

"Maybe you can convince Joel buy one for yourselves. He can certainly afford it," she told you with a wink.

"Yeah, and Zach can't?"

She shrugged, smile still stretched across her face but you could see something shifting in her eyes. "Can I tell you something?"

You nodded and leaned a little closer.

"I don't think Zach's doing very well. Business-wise."

Your eyes widened, encouraging her to continue.

"I don't know for sure, but I have overheard a few conversations and I get the feeling if he doesn't win this bid, his hotel chain is done for."

"Oh, no," you breathed, brows crinkling with concern. "Zoe, I'm so sorry."

She gave you a confused look but quickly recovered. "Oh, thanks. It's no big deal, you know. I'll be just fine."

What did that mean? Zoe would be just fine if Zach went bankrupt? How?

You wanted to press her further but you could tell the door closed. She was looking down at her freshly manicured nails with a huge smile then held them up to your face and wiggled them around.

"What do you think?"

She had picked a white nail polish with a faint hint of sparkle. The color did look very nice against her tanned skin and you told her so right when your technician released your hands, announcing you were all set. Pulling your fingers from the blue light, you admired them up close.

"Alright, I'll admit it. I questioned your color choice before but damn, that looks so pretty on you," Zoe said enviously as she examined your hot pink nails with a glitter top coat.

"Thanks," you gushed, hardly able to tear your eyes away after you left the salon and headed for the elevators. You could count on one hand how many times you ever got your nails done in the past and it was always for a special occasion: prom, a wedding... maybe once when someone got you a gift certificate for Christmas. It felt like such a treat and it gave you a nice little confidence boost.

You waved to Zoe when she got off on her floor, vowing to see each other in the morning bright and early on the dock, then rode the elevator the rest of the way to your floor.

It was difficult to contain your excitement when you entered the room, but you remained quiet because you heard Joel's voice carrying from the living room. He had someone on speaker who was discussing budgets and employee turnover so you snuck past him and headed towards your room to pack.

How much does one person need for two days? Not a lot, probably. But you weren't very clear on the dress code. Was this going to be casual? You already noticed if Glenn organizes the parties, the vibe is much more relaxed but Mary tends to make it a little more formal when she handles things.

After packing a swimsuit, two coverups, one set of pajamas (which you agonized over when you remembered you would be sharing a bed with Joel), and three different options for daytime wear, you went back out into the living room to see if Joel would know what you should pack for the evenings.

"Joel?" you asked softly when you spotted him sitting quietly on the couch with his eyes closed. He tilted his head to the side and slowly opened his eyes. "Are you okay?" you asked. He nodded and stood with a groan.

"Just tired," he said right when his laptop chirped with two new emails. He began to walk towards the table but you were closer. You bravely closed his laptop with two fingers and he froze.

"C'mon, what're you doin'?" he asked, taking another step, but you shook your head and leaned forward, resting your weight on the arm that was holding his computer closed.

"You need to take a break," you told him firmly. He scowled and crossed his arms.

"I'll be takin' a break when we're on the damn yacht."

"Taking a break on the weekend is a given. You work around the clock, Joel, you need to slow down."

"I don't got time for this," he told you with a shake of his head. "I'm busy, I got a company to run."

"Well that's just too bad because I have dresses to try on and I need help picking ones to pack," you told him just as sternly. His eyes flickered up to yours and you could practically see the gears in his head turning. "I think that's far more important than some emails, don't you think?"

His mouth twitched and you could see his face soften and you knew you had him.

"Fine. Ten minutes," he relented. You grinned and skipped off to your room, and only when your back was turned did he allow himself to smile.

Joel sat patiently on your bed while you tried on the handful of dresses you grabbed and put in the bathroom, waltzing back into your room every few minutes with a new one to show him.

"Darlin', I already told you. You look good in all of these."

"Yeah, but which ones are your favorites?" you pressed, doing a little twirl so he could see the back of the pink dress you were currently wearing. "And what will we be doing? Like, how formal are these evenings going to be?"

He shook his head, his eyes glued to the curve of your back when you spun around again. "Not that formal. One night we'll be on the beach, the other night just on the deck."

You nodded and tapped your chin with your finger. Any of the dresses you had would do now that he told you it wasn't that formal, but you were pushing twenty minutes of no laptop or cell phone useage and you really wanted him to take a longer break from work, so you had an idea.

"Okay, just one more. I'll be right back," you told him, scurrying off to the bathroom to slip into a deep purple dress that just so happened to be the shortest one in the bunch by a mile. You weren't sure what Joel's assistant was thinking buying you something so short and tight. When you looked in the mirror, the fabric clung to your curves, leaving very little to the imagination with only two thin spaghetti straps to hold it up.

Obviously it was too inappropriate to wear on the yacht, but that didn't stop you from taking a deep, nervous breath and strolling back into your bedroom with what you hoped was an air of innocence.

He was leaning back on his elbows when you walked in, eyes drifting around your room and taking note of the items you kept on your nightstand, but when he saw what you were wearing he straightened right up.

"What do you think?" you asked as you twirled, but that time you made sure to take it slow.

"It's, uh..." his throat when dry when he saw how perfectly the dress hugged your ass and he had to clear his throat. "Nice," he finally managed to say. You fought back a smirk when you heard the strain in his voice.

"Yeah?" you asked, looking down at the dress. "I don't know, the material is a little rough."

Joel swallowed when you ran your hands slowly down the fabric, your palms traversing over your soft curves, making his fingers twitch.

As if you read his mind, you looked back up at him with a little pout and asked, "you wanna feel?"

Without hesitation, he spread his knees and beckoned you over with two fingers. You grinned and stepped forward, stopping when you stood between his legs, his mouth mere inches away from your stomach.

You could feel his hot breath through the dress and you had to suppress a tingle down your spine, but when he lifted his hands to cup the backs of your bare thighs, you couldn't hide your reaction that time. You made a little noise in the back of your throat when his fingers squeezed your legs and he looked up at you, eyes so dark and filled with lust that it took your breath away.

"This okay?"

"Mhmm," you hummed, your hands coming up to his shoulders so you could balance yourself. His fingers inched up your legs slowly, tentatively exploring without giving into his deepest desires. But fuck... if he wanted to, you would have let him.

He slid his hands up the sides of your thighs, his fingers catching a bit on the hem of your dress before reaching your hips. He caressed the material there with both hands, each of you still pretending as if the fabric of the dress was any concern.

"See what I mean?" you whispered. Slowly, he nodded, but his eyes remained pinned on your body, his gaze drinking in every inch of you, committing you to memory.

"Fuck, you look good," he murmured as if it pained him, letting the facade slip for a moment. Your heart fluttered in your chest and you began to play with the curls on the back of his head. He tilted his chin to look up at you, his lips parted and his cheeks a little flushed. Nothing else had happened since that afternoon in the ocean when he kissed you other than leaving you completely confused about the nature of your relationship. But in that moment, you couldn't care less. All you wanted was to feel his lips on yours again, to feel that spark of electricity over your skin, so you leaned down a fraction, your gaze flicking from his eyes to his lips, making your intention crystal clear.

Just as you were about to brush your lips against his, he pulled his head away and dropped his hands. Immediately, you straightened back up, embarrassment warming your face while you tried to figure out what you did wrong.

"We can't," was all he said, eyes drifting to look everywhere except at you. You nodded and quickly stepped back, shame coursing through your veins.

"I'm sorry," you said, your voice cracking a bit. You cleared your throat and repeated yourself then hurried out of the room to get changed.

Joel called your name, asking you to come back, but you were too ashamed. Instead, you slipped back into the bathroom and practically ripped the purple dress off out of anger, vowing to tuck it way back into the depths of your closet so you wouldn't have to look at it the entire rest of the trip.

By the following morning, you forced yourself to brush off the awkwardness with Joel from the day before. You had three more weeks to spend with him pretending to be his fianceé and you refused to let one uncomfortable situation dictate the rest of your time there. So you plastered on a big smile for him the next morning when you exited your room with your bags in each hand. You could tell he wasn't sure how to react. He tiptoed lightly around you, making sure he didn't even accidentally touch you as you both moved around the hotel room collecting everything you would need.

In the elevator ride down to the lobby, he tried to bring it up but you cut him off before he could even finish his sentence.

"Did you remember your seasick medication?"

He floundered for a moment, scanning your face for any sign of bitterness, but he found none. If you wanted to pretend it never happened, that was fine by him.

"Yeah," he finally said, and you nodded before turning to stare straight ahead at the closed elevator doors.

He didn't try to mention it again.

When you arrived at the dock with the sun just beginning to peek over the water, casting the ocean in a beautiful golden hue, you felt your mood instantly improve. You were in fucking paradise and nothing was going to ruin that for you.

The crew was loading up your belongings and you were chatting with Glenn and Mary about how excited you were when Glenn's phone pinged in his hand.

He tugged his glasses out of his shirt pocket so he could read the text and he let out a disappointed groan.

"Ian's got food poisoning, Harry says," he told the three of you, "they can't make it. That's a damn shame."

"Oh, that's terrible. I hope it's not too serious," Mary said sympathetically.

You heard the telltale sound of heels tapping on the wooden planks behind you and you turned around to see the rest of the couples, along with Trevor and Brooks, arriving. The crew hurried past to assist with their bags and for the first time all day, Joel wrapped an arm around your waist. Your muscles stiffened at first and he felt it. Guilt washed over him before he cleared his throat and lifted his other hand in greeting. Zoe spotted you and waved excitedly, her energy just as infectious in the early morning hours.

When you spotted Tammy a few yards behind Zoe, your smile faltered a bit. You still hadn't brought up what you learned to Joel. Did you even have a right to know about his past with Tammy? You thought you did given how it could blow your cover, but maybe it was just gossip.

Still, it got under your skin.

When Zoe greeted you with a hug, you caught the look of distaste Tammy shot to Lynne before turning her head to gaze out over the ocean. It couldn't just be in your head at this point. There was definitely something going on with these women that you were not privy to yet.

Joel took your hand and lead you aboard the yacht, once again feeling the discomfort at his touch radiating off you.

He handled everything all wrong, he knew that almost immediately. It was all his fault. He was weak that day in the ocean and couldn't stop himself from kissing you, and now you were confused and hurt, but there was a reason he didn't want a traditional sugar baby agreement. He needed to keep his eye on the prize and stay focused, not standing there pretending to admire the lavish sitting room Glenn was showing everyone while wondering if you were wearing the lingerie he purchased for you.

How the hell did you manage to weave your way into his psyche so fast?

After the tour of the yacht, which was luxurious and had three levels, you were shown your private rooms, all of which included your own bathroom and a window so you could admire the sea from bed.

Joel ticked his jaw to the side as he looked around while you began to unpack a few of your things.

"I can sleep on the floor," he said. Your back was to him but he saw your hands freeze inside your bag before you took a deep breath and continued to pull out your toiletries.

"Don't be ridiculous. We can manage two nights in the same bed."

Even though you couldn't see him, he nodded anyway. He should just say it. Say he's sorry. Sorry for all of it. Sorry for leading you on, sorry for hurting your feelings, sorry for staring at your legs and wondering what they would feel like wrapped around his head.

The guests slowly made their way into the indoor sitting area once they settled in. If there wasn't an entire wall made of glass so you could look out the back of the yacht, you would have thought you were in another mansion. The carpet was plush and white under your feet. When you saw how pristine it was, you almost wanted to ask if you should take your sandals off, but instead you took Joel's lead and left them on.

There were three long, white couches that formed a U shape around a large, cherry wood coffee table. Above your heads the ceiling was dotted and lined with soft lights, giving the whole room a very warm and inviting glow. Abstract art hung on the walls but there wasn't much space: any wall that bordered the sea was made of glass. And across from the couches, built up against an interior wall was a bar that appeared to be stocked with every liquor and mixer known to man.

The crew had poured glasses of champagne and mimosas and left them on the bar. They were standing at attention against the wall near the kitchen, waiting to jump into action if need be.

Joel picked up two mimosas and handed you one. You nearly declined when you noted the early hour but decided to take it anyway with a quiet thanks.

"Meant to tell you, I like your nails," Joel said, pointing to your fingers wrapped around your glass. You gave him a small smile before looking back down at your glittery, hot pink nails.

"Thanks," you said, wishing you felt as excited about them as you were yesterday.

Glenn clapped his hands loudly, commanding the attention of the room. He let everyone know breakfast would be served on the dining room on the deck in ten minutes and encouraged people to grab a drink before heading out.

The moment the glass doors were opened, your senses were overcome with fresh, sea-salt air and an occasional fine mist that was being vented above the partially enclosed area.

Everyone found a seat around the square table that was already set with beautiful white plates trimmed in gold with matching bowls and mugs. When the crew began to place trays of fruit, baked goods, meats, eggs, and yogurt on the table, you leaned into Joel and tapped his shoulder.

"Did you take your medicine?" you whispered.

He smiled and put his glass down so he could fish the bottle of pills from his pocket.

"Thank you. That woulda been ugly," he joked, making you giggle before reaching for the tray of fruit. His chest warmed at the sound, pleased to see you smiling again but damn near giddy that he was the one to make you laugh.

You weren't terribly hungry but you nibbled at some fruit and yogurt, knowing you should at least try to eat something if you were expected to keep up with the way the group drank.

After about an hour at the table where you nursed the same mimosa Joel had given you earlier, Glenn stood up and suggested the men go to the top floor for cigars and poker.

"Looks like it's just us, ladies," Mary said gleefully when all the men began to place their cloth napkins on the table and, collecting their own drinks, stood to follow Glenn up the stairs.

"You good?" Joel asked softly before he left. You quickly nodded and shooed him off. You were still feeling rather vulnerable from being shot down the day before but you could feel yourself coming around. Maybe some distance and distraction would help.

If only you knew what the day had in store.

By noon the sun was blazing, the heat seared your skin as you laid out on your lounge chair with the other women. You could smell the faint hint of cigar smoke and hear the laughter from the men up above, but you couldn't see them from where you were. Occasionally you would hear Joel's voice, his southern twang becoming deeper and louder the more he drank and you found yourself smiling.

You were at least three drinks deep and you felt completely relaxed. All your concerns drifted away, getting twisted in the breeze and floating over the water. You even managed to find Tammy somewhat tolerable as you listened to her tell the group about her teenage son and a girl he was dating.

Maybe Zoe was wrong. Maybe it was just a rumor. Tammy seemed to be happy and fulfilled. She had what appeared to be a very strong marriage with Scott and they had two boys. By all accounts, they appeared to be a very happy family.

"I think I'm gonna take a break in the shade," Zoe announced, fanning herself while she picked up her things.

"Okay, dear. There should be chilled bottles of water out but if not, just ask the bartender. He can get you whatever you need," Mary told her while she adjusted her enormous sun hat.

"I think I'll join you," you said, suddenly feeling like your mouth was coated in sand. You couldn't even remember drinking any water since the hotel that morning.

The three other women waved politely when you stood and followed Zoe back inside where the air conditioning embraced you like an old friend.

"Oh, god, that feels nice," you groaned. The room was empty except for one bartender who was taking stock of the liquor with a clipboard. He quickly set it aside when Zoe approached and asked for two waters. You picked a couch and set your things down next to you with a sigh, then thanked Zoe when she handed you a frosted glass bottle of water.

Both of you practically chugged your respective drinks in under a minute, then giggled when you realized how crazy you must have looked.

"We gotta pace ourselves," Zoe said with a grin and a shake of her head. "It's gonna be a long night. Zach said we aren't supposed to reach the island til six, and with the time it will take for the crew to set up and cook, we'll be eating dinner late."

"That means we'll be getting back here even later," you said, finishing her thought.

She nodded and tossed her hair over her shoulder, her eyes a little glassy and her cheeks a little pink, either from the sun or alcohol or both. But based on the way she couldn't stop laughing at the smallest thing, you suspected alcohol was the bigger reason. When she glanced at you and erupted into a fit of giggles again without having to say a word, you knew for sure she was a little past tipsy.

"What?" you laughed, her silly mood too contagious to resist.

"Nothing, nothing," she said with a wave, then seemed to think about it for a second before giving you a mischievous grin and leaned forward, cupping her hand around her mouth in an attempt to muffle her voice, but it didn't work.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

You shrugged and nodded. "Sure."

She giggled again, slapping her palm over her mouth and tucking her chin against her chest. You frowned and laughed at how ridiculous she was acting and wondered what on earth she was about to say.

She cupped her hand over her mouth again and whispered loudly, "how is Joel in bed?"

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise at her question. Instantly, images and daydreams of what you thought Joel would be like in bed flashed across your mind. What the weight of his body would feel like pressed against yours, pushing you into the mattress. How his lips would feel wrapped around your nipple, his teeth teasing and pinching your skin. Would he kiss you slow and deep or passionate and needy? Would he groan your name when he buried his cock deep inside you? What was his favorite position?

All these things and more you had found yourself wondering more times than you could count since a few days ago in the ocean. He had completely taken over your mind to the point where you could hardly remember the girl you were when you first met, sitting in his office ready to storm out because of his abrupt and seemingly unpleasant nature.

You cleared your throat as you bought some time to scrounge up a lie.

"He's... good. Really good," you added. She nodded excitedly and rolled her wrist, urging you to continue. "He's attentive and... he doesn't rush." You could feel your cheeks heating up when you realized you were just telling her what you wished he was like, what you wished any of the men you had been with were like, only to always fall short in some way or another. "I'm not saying he can't be-" you glanced over your shoulder before lowering your voice, "rougher, because he can. There's been times I can hardly move after," you giggled and she gasped enthusiastically. "But he's always so sweet when we're done. He takes such good care of me, gets me whatever I need, tells me how beautiful I am." You swallowed, feeling only slightly pathetic at how you were turning yourself on with your own lies.

"How about Zach? What's he like?" you asked, changing the subject. Her face fell and she waved you off before taking another sip of water.

"Girl, c'mon, you know the answer to that."

Now it was your turn to gasp but the corners of your mouth twitched into a playful smile.

"What do you mean?"

She rolled her eyes at you and sighed. "You've seen him. He's not hiding anything spectacular, I promise you that."

Zach was significantly older than Zoe. Their age difference especially showed when he stood after sitting for a while, groaning deeply and usually needing a hand to steady himself, or when his phone alarm went off at various times during the day, volume practically maxed out, reminding him to take some pill. But you never got the impression Zoe was unhappy until now.

"So why are you with him?" you asked. Of course, you had to assume his money had something to do with it, but her answer was still not what you expected.

"Can you keep a secret?" she asked conspiratorially. You nodded and leaned forward. Zoe glanced around to make sure nobody else snuck into the massive sitting room before she whispered, "I'm a sugar baby."

"Y-you're... what?" you asked, your voice wavering. Fuck, you really wished you didn't have that last mojito. You were trying to keep your cool but your vision was swimming and your mind was buzzing.

"I think Tammy and Lynne suspect something. I think that's why they don't like me," she said, leaning back and gazing out to the ocean. "Nobody knows for sure, you can't say a word," she said, fear suddenly gripping her. "If Glenn found out, it would be over for Zach. Glenn holds way too much weight on family shit. He already isn't thrilled with our age difference," she sighed, gazing down at her freshly manicured nails. "But between you and me, I hope he doesn't get this land. He wouldn't be able to afford me anymore. Like, I want what's best for him and I want him to be happy, but this relationship is running its course, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah," you breathed, "wow, I had no idea."

She shrugged and picked up her phone. "It's really not a bad gig, but it would be a hell of a lot better if the guys looked like Joel instead of Zach," she giggled.

You laughed softly and took another sip of your water, your mind reeling. The pressure to pull off this little stint was mounting. Joel wasn't the only one who noticed Glenn was a man with family values and tried to do the exact same thing, and now more than ever Joel's alleged affair with Tammy seemed like a huge loose end that could jeopardize your whole lie.

Your nerves got the best of you. Looking back on it, you should have realized that before having two more drinks with lunch, but Zoe's bombshell left you rattled and you got carried away.

Around four in the afternoon, the men returned from the upper deck with their skin pink and their shirts a little damp from sweat, but they were all smiles when they stepped out onto the deck to find their partners with the exception of Glenn's sons, who came by themselves.

Joel didn't notice at first how tipsy you were because you did your best to hide behind a pair of sunglasses and a large hat. He sat down on the lounge chair near yours, looking like he had a couple drinks himself but not nearly as many as you. He appeared relaxed and at ease, no doubt pleased by whatever progress he made with Glenn in the past few hours.

"How's everythin' goin' down here?" he asked, his eyes scanning around the crowd of people who were beginning to mingle.

"Good," you said, "I found out some very interesting information that-" you hiccupped and covered your mouth, "that you would find interesting."

He raised an eyebrow at you and smirked. "Interesting information that I would find interesting?"

"Mhmm," you said, nodding vigorously this time. "I will tell you later," you added, unnecessarily enunciating each word, "when we're alone," you whispered, not realizing your voice was still rather loud. It didn't matter anyway, nobody could overhear you when the guests were all breaking up into groups and talking over each other, but still.

He grinned and glanced around the deck, "Alright, then," he replied. He was about to say more when his eyes landed on someone over your shoulder and he stiffened. You were too slow on the uptake to see what Tammy was mouthing to him, but when he subtly nodded and stood up, you glanced behind you to see her walking discreetly into the yacht, leaving her clueless husband behind.

"I'll be right back," he said to you, and before you could say anything to stop him, he strolled off in her wake, leaving you all alone.

You could blame the alcohol and pretend you weren't jealous, but you were absolutely fuming. Zoe had to be right. How could he be so careless? Did he really think nobody would notice? How could he not tell you about his history with Tammy when it could all blow up in your faces?

Then something occurred to you that made your stomach roll and you had to take a few deep breaths to fight back the wave of nausea.

What if they were still having an affair?

Is that why he didn't want to take things further with you? We can't, he had said. Was he fucking another man's wife this entire time?

You never felt so stupid in your life. Of course, that's what it was. No wonder he put a clause in your contract stating that sex was not to be part of the agreement. How fucking pathetic of him to act so faithful to another man's wife.

What if he was fucking her right now?

You stood up too quickly and lost your balance, but fortunately an arm shot out to steady you.

"Hey, you okay?"

You glanced up over your sunglasses to find Brooks, one of Glenn's sons, standing there with his hand wrapped around your arm looking concerned.

Quickly, you shook your head and forced a smile. "Yeah, the sun got to me, I think," you told him, then after another moment you realized his grip around your bicep hadn't loosened. Your eyes slowly drifted down to his hand and you gave your arm a little tug. Finally, he released you and you gave him a polite chuckle before fixing your cover up so you would feel less exposed in your bikini under his gaze.

"My dad says we should be reaching the island soon," he said, shoving his hands into the pockets of his board shorts. They were neon blue and hung low on his hips. Almost too low, as if he were trying to draw your attention to it.

"Yeah, it sounds great. Should be fun," you mumbled, glancing around the deck, still not finding Joel or Tammy.

"Ever been here before?" he asked, tilting his head to the side. You shook your head.

"To Fiji? No," you answered.

"I'm surprised. It's a pretty common vacation spot for people in Joel's circle," Brooks said. If you were a little less distracted you might have picked up on the fact that he said Joel's circle and not your circle, but you didn't. You were too fixated on your anger and you were fueled by one too many drinks.

"Yeah - would you excuse me? I need to use the restroom," you said, gathering your things in your arms.

"Sure thing," he said, taking a step back so you could brush past him. "See you at dinner."

You gave him what you hoped was a polite wave before storming towards the glass doors that led into the yacht, but just when you were a few feet away, the door swung open and Tammy stepped out. It could have been your paranoia, but you thought she had a little smirk on her face when she passed by you and after that, all you saw was red.

You breezed through the sitting room. The only other people around were two servers who were quietly packing up dishware to take to the beach, then Joel suddenly appeared in the entryway that led back to your room wearing a different shirt than before and you clenched your teeth.

"Hey, was just comin' to get you," he said, not yet picking up on your anger. "You should get ready for dinner, we'll be there soon."

You narrowed your eyes at him and crossed your arms, uncaring that you could be overheard when you spat, "whatever you say, daddy," your tone clipped and dripping with disdain.

The muscles in his jaw twitched and his nostrils flared when he finally sensed your energy. He looked up, catching the eye of one of the crew members, who quickly averted his gaze and pretended not to have overheard what you said, then grabbed your arm.

You had the presence of mind not to fight him and cause a scene, but once he hauled you halfway down the hallway towards some privacy, you wrenched your arm out of his hold.

"The hell's the matter with you?" he seethed. "Are you fuckin' drunk?"

You rolled your shoulder, trying to fix your coverup that slipped down your arm while staring daggers at him.

"What's the matter with me?" you repeated, "what about you? What are you doing? Do you really think nobody sees what's going on?"

He furrowed his brow in confusion and made a face. "What are you talkin' 'bout?"

You took a menacing step forward and lowered your voice. "I'm talking about Tammy, Joel."

His eyes flashed with something you couldn't identify and you hardly had a chance to react before he grabbed your arm again and practically dragged you the rest of the way down the hall towards your room. Once you were safely inside, he slammed the door behind him and stalked over to you, making you stumble backwards in surprise.

"What the hell do you know 'bout that?"

You scoffed and rolled your eyes, trying to push down the wave of envy that bubbled up. "So it is true."

"Answer my fuckin' question," he growled, his eyes steely and his breath coming in quick. You shrugged and tried your best not to look nervous while being the target of his wrath.

"That you're having an affair," you said simply.

He stared down at you for what felt like hours before he exhaled and stepped back. He pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head before murmuring, "who told you?"

"Zoe," you sneered, taking one step backwards so you could rest your head against the wall. "Guess that means Zach knows, too."

"Fuck," he grumbled, then dragged his palms down his face in agony. "Fuck!" he said again, but shouted it that time and pounded his fist on top of a dresser.

You watched him nervously as he paced around the room, his anger beginning to sober you up a bit.

"You should have told me," you snapped. He swiveled around to look at you, his jaw so tight he could have cracked a tooth. "You could have ruined this entire thing but you're lucky I was quick on my feet and covered for you."

"You only need to know what I say you need to know," he said darkly, sending a shiver down your spine. "You were hired to do a job, so fuckin' do it."

You swallowed the lump in your throat when you saw the look in his eye.

"I'm trying, but you-"

"No," he said, cutting you off and closing the distance between you. "You were hired to look pretty and act like you're in love with me. That's fuckin' it. Everythin' else is none of your goddamn business."

You were just digging your own grave at that point so you figured there was no harm in tossing one more barb his way.

"Suppose it would have been too much to ask for you to at least tell me why you left sex out of our arrangement, but at least I know now it's not me. It's 'cause you're getting it somewhere else."

He inhaled sharply, his scowl cutting you in half.

"That's what this is 'bout?" he asked, stepping even closer. "You got your feelin's hurt yesterday?" His tone implied insincere pity and it sent a jolt of embarrassment through you but you remained quiet and held his gaze. He somehow had managed to cage you in against the wall, his arms bracing around your head as he leaned in closer. You could now smell a hint of toothpaste on his breath from when he came in earlier, without you, and you couldn't stop your next words from tumbling out.

"Did you bring her back here and fuck her in the bed I'm going to sleep in tonight?"

He smirked. He fucking smirked and you never in your life wanted to slap someone more.

"Jealous, baby?" he cooed. You shook your head but he just continued to give you that smug look. "Oh, I think you are. And you know what else?" He was taunting you now and you should have pushed him away but you just couldn't bring yourself to do it. He leaned in so his lips brushed against your ear when he whispered, "I think you would let me fuck you right now, if I wanted to."

Tears sprung up in your eyes unexpectedly so you quickly slid them shut. You refused to let him have the satisfaction of your humiliation.

Finally, he pushed himself off the wall and gave you space so you could breathe. With your eyes still closed, he spoke again from the other side of the room.

"I was gone ten minutes. Gimme some credit. I ain't fuckin' anyone in ten minutes."

You heard him yank open the closet and you managed to crack open your eyelids with a pathetic sniffle, watching as he tossed a black dress onto the bed.

"Get ready. We'll be leavin' for the island soon." Then disappeared through the door.

It only took about five minutes before Joel calmed down when the guilt crept in again. Once more he handled another situation with you as poorly as possible and to top it off, he was fairly certain he brought you to tears when he left.

He was so fucking stupid. He should have just told you the truth. He should have told you he hadn't slept with Tammy in over a year and what they had was over, but he just had to keep pushing and pushing. How did he keep making mistake after mistake? You weren't wrong. He should have given you a heads up about Tammy, but he never thought anyone else knew. And instead of admitting it, he lashed out, taking his anger out on you when it wasn't even your fault to begin with. It was his, for being careless and stupid enough for others to find out.

When you emerged from your shared room looking refreshed and fucking stunning in the dress he had rudely thrown onto the bed, he almost apologized. He wanted to, but one look at you told him you were not at all ready to hear it, so he swallowed his words and gave you some space. Well, as much space as he could allow when you were surrounded by ten other people on a deserted beach at sunset eating dinner.

He resisted the urge to drape his arm around the back of your chair or brush his fingers against yours where they rested on the table. Please forgive me, I'm sorry, he kept thinking every time he glanced your way, but you avoided all eye contact and focused on the conversation around you.

During dinner, he noticed you had not one but two more drinks and hardly touched a thing on your plate. He wanted to say something, he wanted to encourage you to at least eat a little more, but he couldn't risk setting you off again, especially in front of everyone. So he bit his tongue and smiled politely when he needed to but mentally he was scrambling to come up with a way to make things up to you.

You stretched your neck with a sigh at one point, drawing his attention, his eyes lingering on the way your fingers trailed down your throat, then watched when you pressed two fingertips into a sore spot on the base of your neck.

How could you ever think he wouldn't want you? Of course, he wanted you. Anyone in their right mind would want you. The second he laid eyes on you it was all he could think about. How could you not see that?

Fortunately, the entire group seemed to be tired so nobody really noticed or cared that you and Joel were not very talkative. On the boat ride back, he instinctively reached for your hand when the boat swayed a little in the choppy waters, but you quickly pulled your arm out of reach and turned away.

It was past ten and the waves were rockier than earlier. He wanted to thank you again for reminding him to take his motion sickness pill but he refrained. Fuck, what he wouldn't give to go back to that part of the day and do everything over.

When the boat reached the yacht, you practically leapt off and jogged back inside, his heart sinking in his chest at your retreating form. He offered his good nights and slowly followed you with his head hung low and his hands shoved in his pockets, but when he finally reached your room he realized the real reason you had been in such a hurry.

The moment he opened the door he could hear you retching in the bathroom and his eyes widened. He closed the door behind him quickly and he rushed to the bathroom, pausing on the other side of the door, unsure what to do or say.

"Are you alright?" he finally asked.

"Does it sound like I'm alright?" you shot back before gagging once again. He winced.

"I'll get you some ginger ale and crackers," he said, spinning around the room until he found a mini refrigerator stocked with a few necessities. As expected, some seasick items were supplied, and he picked out a few things he thought might help. Setting them down on your end table, he turned around and scratched his chin.

While he waited for you to emerge, he got himself changed into more comfortable clothes and then went in search of your own pajamas to lay out for you when you were ready. In one of the drawers he found a few motion sickness bags and he left one out for you when an idea struck. Quickly, he rummaged through his pants from earlier and triumphantly pulled out a little plastic bottle of pills.

When was the last time he ever tried this hard for a woman?

Just as he was about to call out to you again, you swung open the door. Your face looked pale and your eyes were red but you remained defiant and refused to glance his way. You spotted the clothes he laid out for you, and then the items on your bedside, and he thought he saw a flicker of affection in your eyes before you blinked and it was gone.

"Here," he said, holding out the bottle for you. "Take one of these, it'll help."

You stared at it for a few moments as you weighed your options, then begrudgingly snatched it from his hand and tapped one out into your palm. Tossing the bottle onto his side of the bed, you swallowed the pill with the water he set out for you and picked up your pajamas before retreating back into the bathroom for some privacy.

By the time you had changed, Joel had already switched the television on low to some bright sitcom he thought you might like and had turned down the bed. He sat on his side of the mattress, shamefully staring down at his fingers laced together in his lap, then glanced up when he heard the door open and the light turn off.

"Thank you," you murmured before sliding into bed and pulling the covers up to your chin.

"You're welcome," he said softly. He watched you silently for a few minutes while the corners of your mouth twitched occasionally at something that was said on the television, then he cleared his throat, warning you he was about to speak.

"I'm sorry," he said, brows pinching together. You looked up at him in surprise but said nothing, so he continued. "I shoulda told you 'bout Tammy. You were right. And I shouldn't've said... that other stuff," he added weakly, looking down at his hands again. "I ain't any good at this," he continued, pursing his lips in thought. "I push people away, I say all the wrong shit, always have, and now I'm doin' it to you. And it's... it ain't right."

You scanned his face, your resolve crumbling when you saw the sincerity behind his eyes.

"It's okay," you finally said, your voice sounding so small from underneath the plush comforter.

He shook his head. "No, it ain't."

"No, but I forgive you, anyway."

He finally dragged his eyes up to meet yours and smiled. "Thank you, darlin'."

You sighed and readjusted a bit under the covers. "I'm sorry, too."

"Nothin' for you to be sorry for."

"I got too drunk and embarrassed you. It won't happen again."

He scoffed and gave you a look of disbelief. "Half the people on this boat got just as drunk as you. These people are borderline alcoholics," he said, making you giggle a little. He grinned, his heart soaring when he heard the sound. "None of 'em probably even remember we went to dinner."

You laughed a little louder at that and he joined in with a chuckle under his breath. He could feel his muscles relaxing, his nerves settling. He may have just salvaged things yet.

Joel leaned back and tucked his legs under the covers, watching the sitcom but not really absorbing anything. In the past, when he let his mind wander, it was not exactly the way he pictured being in bed with you, but it was still nice.

"Things are over with me 'n her, by the way," he said after a long, comfortable silence. Your body stiffened and you tipped your head in his direction.

"Why didn't you just tell me that to begin with?"

He grinned and shrugged. "Maybe I liked it when you got jealous."

Your cheeks flared with heat and you pulled the bedding up tighter around you.

"Asshole," you muttered. He laughed, making you smile.

"I deserved that."

He could tell when you began to drift off. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw your head tilt towards your shoulder and your perfect lips part ever so slightly. You began to snore so softly, it almost seemed fake. No one looked and sounded that beautiful when they slept. Especially after being sick. But of course, you did. He should have known.

Joel reached over and flicked the lights off, washing the room in the television's glow, then slid deeper underneath the covers. Quietly, he turned the TV off and waited until his eyes adjusted to the darkness before rolling his head to the side to look at you.

What the hell were you doing to him?

It had only been a week and he could already feel himself falling, already doing things out of character and feeling more at ease in general.

So what was one more thing?

Carefully, so as not to wake you, he inched forward and wrapped one arm around your middle, pausing to see if you would stir. When your breath remained steady and even, he got a little closer and pulled.

You took a deep breath and sighed, then rolled onto your side. He closed the remaining space between you and tucked you against his chest while snaking one arm under your pillow, the other still around your waist.

The last thing he remembered thinking was how your hair smelled like coconut and vanilla, a comforting scent he wanted to wrap himself in that was so soft and addicting, it put him right to sleep.

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[episodes-ff]

Touched

This a cute lil something something that I had playing out in my head for a few weeks now so I thought I’d put it into reality. Enjoyyyy!!!!

**SIX YEARS AGO**

Anaya

"Boyyyyyy, I am not doing all that!" I giggled over FaceTime as Terry begged for me to come with him to the club with his friends. It's been a month since Terry and I have started talking and one thing I've learned about him is he is very much persistent to get what he wants. We’ve been playfully going back and forth over the last hour because his cousin Mike is in town and he wants me to come out. “Come on, girl, we talk on the phone enough. I wanna see your pretty ass in person.” He smirked as he rid himself of his sweaty gym clothes. Eyeing his moist torso through the screen, I subconsciously bit my lip analyzing the sculpted details of his perfect body as my body flushed with heat.

"You know, Anaya, it's a little rude to stare." He husked smoothly causing me to scoff. "Boy whatever! I was not looking at your arrogant ass." I fussed making him laugh as I waved him off. "You haven't taken your eyes off me since we got on the phone, girl. Just admit you want me, Mamas." He flirted causing me to flip him the bird. "When?" "Never." "We'll see." He fought back as I rolled my eyes. "Imma have yo pretty ass." He mumbled under his breath while grabbing a water from his kitchen. "You said what?" "Nothing." "You know you talk a lot of shit?" "Why are you such a hater, Anaya?" "Why are you so annoying, Terry?" I countered as he bit his lip and shook his head at me deep in thought. "Come out with me. I'm not taking no either." Taking a gulp of water as he stared me down in the camera, my pussy subtly throbbed under the eye contact before I let out a deep groan. "Ugghhhhh fine! Damn!" "Now was it so hard to listen to Daddy?" "You are not my damn Daddy." "Not yet." He once again mumbled yet again thinking I hadn’t caught it. "Send the address and get off my phone." I fussed before he chuckled heartily and I hung up. Hearing a ping, I checked my texts to confirm before I got up to go find an outfit.

Taking in my appearance, I smiled doing a slow whine of my hips before taming any fly aways in my hair. Doing a final spin, I made sure Bash was well fed before securing my heels and purse before making my way downstairs to my awaiting Uber. Arriving to the club, I thanked my driver before hopping out and making my way up to the line. Standing and waiting, I texted Terry to let him know I had arrived before feeling a tap on my shoulder. Looking up I was met with a security guard. "Anaya?" "Ummmm, Yes." "Follow me." Smiling shyly as he opened the belt to let me out of line, I followed behind as the crowd groaned with having to wait. Walking inside the loud club, I got a bit of hype as the vibes and music engulfed me. Bodies collided hungrily on the dance floor while sections were lined with the cream of the crop.

Walking me over to a section, I spotted him amongst a group of guys looking as good as our first meeting. He looked so good, I could just take a bite out of him where he stood. Getting caught so deep in my thoughts, I hadn't noticed him walking over and standing in front of me until he snapped his fingers in my ear. "Huh?" "I was saying you finally made it. Damn, Mama, I know I'm handsome but I ain't know you would get lost in the sauce." He gloated laughing as I shot a sarcastic smirk at him. "Boy! You are not all that." "Shiiiit, I can be whatever you want me to be, baby." He breathed against my ear as he snaked his hand around my back to touch my waist. Feeling slightly flush in his hold, I cleared my throat before meeting his eyes as he bit his lip. "Ayeee, Tee! You not gone introduce us?" One of his friends questioned breaking us from our staring match. "My fault my fault. Y'all this is Anaya. Anaya, this is my cousin Mike and my homeboys, Brandon, Eric, Ace, and my homegirls Bree, Leah, and Asha." Introducing myself with a wave, I received a round of friendly hey's from the guys before feeling ravenous daggers coming from the girls as I noticed Bree staring down Terry. Internally rolling my eyes, I shrugged off their evil looks before gently smiling as Terry wrapped his hand around my waist.

Terry

Tonight was supposed to be a chill ass night with the guys, enjoying a few drinks, and getting to know Anaya better, but this shit been anything but. Ace bitch ass would invite Bree and her girls on some funny shit and their messy asses would convince her to come out. I don't even know why the hell she's so pressed anyway; we hooked up twice a few years ago and she decided we'd be better off staying friends. She's had boyfriends and all types of shit but the one time I bring a girl around that I care for, it's a problem. They been being so shady and rude to Naya all night and she hasn't been nothing but nice to em.

Watching her start twirling her hips in the section as the next song came on, I decided to get up and make my move. "C'mere." "What?" "Dance with me." I husked in her ear as the music blasted. Looking up at me and shyly nodding, I took her hand and lead her through the crowd to the dance floor. Pulling her up close to me, the beat vibrated through our bodies as she wound her waist against me and bit her lip. Bending forward, she twerked as the crowd got hype cheering her on. Holding onto her backside, I caught the rhythm as my homeboys held me up so she could take me for a ride. Hearing the DJ transition to the next song, she rose up and giggled as I smiled whipping her around to face me. "So you can dance, huh?" "Something like that. I see you can catch a lil rhythm too." "Something like that." I smiled pulling her closer and rubbing her body as we got carried away in the beat.

Feeling her fall forward, she turned around and eyed Leah as she sipped her drink. "Oh my gosh, girl. I am so sorry!" She muttered sarcastically as I mugged her. Waving her off, I turned Anaya back to me and whispered against her neck. "Ignore her." I commanded as I tilted her chin up to look at me. The electricity between us was crazy right now. I could almost feel it crackling off her lips. Leaning in to seize the moment, we were once again being bumped. "Yo what the fuck?!" "Really, Terry?! This how the fuck you gone do me after everything we shared?" Bree spat in anguish as her girls nodded in fake support. "Yo, Bree, back the fuck up away from me, aight? You tripping!" "No nigga, you tripping! I can't believe you throwing away what we have for this bitch!" "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING A BITCH, TRICK?!" Anaya seethed mushing Bree in the forehead as I stepped in to break them up. "What the fuck is your issue, bruh? We never had shit, never fucking will." "Oh really? So why were you in my fucking bed last night if we don't have shit?! Huh?" She spat flashing a devious smirk as Anaya threw her hands up and stormed off. "Anaya wait!" "No! Clearly you got your hands full already, I knew this shit was too good to be true." She murmured on the verge of tears as she snatched away from me and headed to the bar.

Anaya

Having a seat at the bar, I rolled my eyes and rubbed my temples as I waved for the bartender. Struggling to get his attention, I continued waving my hand before feeling a hand on my waist. "No need, lil mama, allow me. Aye, my man!" This guy said quickly getting the bartender over. "For the lady?" "Can I get two shots of tequila?" "I'll get the same and lemme get a whiskey sour." "Coming right up!" "Thank you." "No problem at all. I'm Rome, by the way." "Anaya." "That's a beautiful name, miss Anaya." He flashed his gleaming smile before kissing my hand gently. Blushing uncontrollably, I took one of my shots and took in his features. "Anaya, can we talk?" Terry said in a huff as he came up to me interrupting our moment. "We don't have anything to talk about Terry." "I'm serious, Anaya. I'm sorry for what happened back there with Bree. We had a very short lived fling a few years ago and that's all. I promise to you I haven't laid a finger on that girl since. I swear to God, Anaya. Please?" He pleaded staring me down with those eyes. Those goddamn eyes! "Terry, it is what it is. Go be happy with her. I don't wanna talk about this anymore." "But Anay-" "Umm, I believe she said the conversation is over with, my man." "My nigga, I'm not talking to you." "From the looks of it, neither is she." Rome interjected stepping between us as I looked on in shock. Not gonna lie it kinda turned me on...

Feeling Terry's glare burning into my soul, I swallowed the lump in my throat before looking up at him. Seeing the anger slowly brewing inside him, I knew he meant business and while I didn't know what either man was capable of, I could quickly tell that Terry wasn't with the games. "I-It's ok, Rome. I got this." I said touching his strong shoulder as I stood and took my last shot. "You sure you okay?" "Yes. Thank you so much for the drinks." I smiled gently before encasing him in a side hug. "No problem at all, lil mama. I'll see you around?" "Sure thing, let me get your number." Taking down his digits as Terry's foot twitched in agitation as I said my farewell. "If you need anything at all, give me a call." Rome whispered against my neck as I nodded. "Thank you again." I said before leaving in a rush as Terry pushed through the club to the exit.

"Can you slow the fuck down? Fuck!" I spat removing my heels so I wouldn't fall as he trekked quickly to his truck. "Hush, Anaya! Gone sit there and take that nigga number down in my fucking face. Out yo fucking mind." He ranted as I tensed at the harshness of his voice. "Get in the car." "Terry, where are you taking me." "Get the fuck in the mothafucking car, Anaya." Silently getting in, he slammed my door before getting in his side and locking the doors. What the fuck did I get myself into?

Tags: @violetmuses @kaylaahisthebestest- @theereina @believeinthefireflies95 @brisunique @madxlov3 @casualsludgeshoetoad @mauvecherie-writes @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @kumkaniudaku @geneziesm @megamindsecretlair @simpledopeme @goldenjasssy @vivaalenaa @playgurlxoxo @ghettogirly @luuvprincess @perfectlyimperfectme @tbmotw @comfortzonequeen @melanin-honeyy @strawberrymoon45 @luckygirlszn @kindofaintrovert @secretlifeoofmarpessa @cmbmjbfan @summwerella @qdancer22 @ihateyallniggas @rebelrel0987 @cheracherachera @bhristpher @cocooned-butterfly @ovohanna24 @theblessedcap @deijalee @ranikyani @catha2003 @magik22 @sweettea-and-honeybutter @pinkbuzzlightyrrr @justicefordeanthomas @liv10002 @kalideshawnwrites @j0joworld @withoutmusiclifewouldbflat @ladynotdiana @mymindisneverhere @brattyfics

It's so many more of y'all I can tag but my hands are cramping. I love you guys SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!! TYSM FOR THE CONTINUED LOVE AND SUPPORT! IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME YOU HAVE NO CLUE!!!

[bloopitynoot]

Reading TGCF: Chapter 78

For those who don't know, I am reading TGCF for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag Bloopitynoot reads TGCF. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read BUT if you followed along with my SVSSS read, the rules and vibe are the same.

Just typing up and posting this now but the chapter was read before Skylar and I did our farmer's market run.

Look at these mushrooms we got! Skylar is making soup tomorrow:

Today- just some hot water; it was too early for anything else.

Let's get into chapter 78!

I will not stand for this Eming slander. Eming is a precious little baby scimitar. Xie Lian is correct. pp120-121

Oh damn! This demon just snapped Pei Ming's sword- easily! p122

This is so wild, I didn't think weapons could partially(?) ascend. I hope Pei Ming's sword is nice? p126

Mingguang ready to recruit other ghosts, but accidentally making enemies LOL p127.

I'm crying LOL Xie Lian's trick to get mingguang to likely cuss out kemo's mom via sign. Please, so good. p129

OMG. It's even funnier now that I know what it means ahahahaha p130

"Learning another language is infinitely beneficial throughout your life" p131

Xie Lian: Are you shitting me Pei Ming? Crush his dick! Pei Ming: [aghast] Too crass! You do it! pp132-133

This is so weird LOL p133

I beg to be put out of my misery. "Wait your highness, I think it got bigger when you complimented it" p136

omg no. This did not get better. I did not expect a scimitar with a praise kink and sexual proclivity towards Xie Lian. I really did not expect the assist in this- relationship(?) - from Pei Ming. pp136-137

I swear sometimes Xie Lian just accidentally wills things into existence. p139

This situation LOOOOOOOOOOOL Mingguang and Kemo fighting Pei Xiu and Banyue. Xie Lian working up the will to kiss Hua Cheng to life while Pei Ming watches(?) supports(?) plus a feature of SO many scorpion snakes. p142 (the art from page 143).

I hope we actually get to meet lord wind master, the guy seems lovely. p145

Finally the beef between Rain Master and Pei Ming is explained and honestly it wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be; just century old grudges. p147

oh no. That's actually kind of sad about Rong Guang. :( Why is my heart feeling things for Pei Ming rn pp149-151

This chapter was complete whiplash

It was the absolutely most absurd and outrageous set of circumstances, but still somehow ended up being so damn sad at the end. MXTX over here giving me false security and then ruining me again!

[wannaeatramyeon]

Fem!reader Isekai in Lookism ?

Anon, so sorry I'm answering this exactly 3 months later. You're my last request from May and I was soooo close to deleting it because I have had exactly zero ideas. Then I got partly inspired by @honeyhotteok fic here and now I'm running on less than 3hrs sleep in work and it's your fault. Oh yeah, and I've completely twisted the ask as well. It's not even close. So all that wait was for nothing 🙇🏻‍♀️

Adventures of YOUR part time job in the Lookismverse

G/N. You work the graveyard shift in a convenience store. You meet bizarre characters on different nights. Part 2

There's something wrong with people your age these days.

Everyone seems to be either in a gang or up to some shady shit. Seriously what is going on. Is this all a big joke that only you aren't in on?

Just the other day you swear you saw a group of guys in boiler suits punch through some walls across the street. Like what the fuck? What did the wall ever do to you? And then someone apparently called Tabasco starts chanting something about Burn Knuckles and oh my fucking god it's 11pm please shut up.

Oh course you never said that, you still have some sense of self preservation.

And how does anyone even have the time for all this. Between school and this part time job, you barely have enough hours to sleep.

You miss Daniel, the coworker who you haven't seen for a good year but used to gossip into the early morning with. He always seemed a bit nervous and fidgety when you voiced your concerns and observations, but you just assumed he was a nervous and fidgety kinda guy.

There would have been some fun stories to share. Instead now you work the graveyard shift on your own.

.

.

Case in point, the guy standing in front of you looks like one bad conversation away from a mental breakdown.

And really you're not in the habit of checking out customers but he cuts a striking figure. Every exposed inch of skin besides his face inked, and (you silently ask for his forgiveness for the objectification) the biggest chest you have ever seen. What even is this guy eating? What is this guy injecting? Lifting?

The question is almost out of your mouth but then you see the look in his eyes and slam your lips shut.

Nevermind. You ring his purchases through and tell him to have a good night.

.

.

You're restocking the shelves when you notice a guy with a scar across his lip and nose, dripping blood from god knows where all over your freshly mopped floor.

Which is alarming in itself but come on man. Look at the floors. You're making it so fucking gross.

He notices you watching him, gives you an apologetic look and says he'll take care of it.

He makes a quick call and in comes 26 guys, one after the other and they line up in front of him.

You know it's exactly 26 because you counted all 26. And you've also watched all 26 pairs of dirty shoes trample over your previously nice clean floor.

The blood drippy guy asks politely for the mop and bucket and you think this must be some sort of prank because why the hell is this even necessary. 26 guys to share your one solitary mop and bucket and to clean a goddamn floor that you managed in 10 minutes.

"Get out." He blinks at you, taken aback by your tone. "Or I'm calling the police."

.

.

"You can bring your pups in!" You call out to the emo teen lurking outside.

Health and safety be damned because look how fucking cute these dogs are!

He hesitates but then the rain grows heavier and all three rush in.

You miss the suspicious glance he gives you, too fixated on how adorable the dogs are. You don't even mind their wet fur or muddy paws because look at these little babies!

And huh, this guy must really love them too with his, you squint, God? Dog? hoodie on. D'aww that's so stinking sweet.

.

.

Damnit, you knew these two would be trouble the moment they stepped foot into your store.

The tall blonde just gives off a distinct creepy vibe and the shorter one has his entire eyebrows shaved off.

Shaved. Off.

You couldn't help but stare when you put their purchases through and noticed some regrowth and stubble. Is this a trend you missed out on? Either way you're glad because there's no way you're shaving off your own eyebrows.

They converse in Japanese, not even saying a word to you. No thanks or anything, which is fine you suppose. But then they pay you in fucking yen.

They're out the door by the time you see the cash and fuck. Your boss is going to go apeshit when he finds out.

.

.

"What do you think, sweetheart?"

A new blonde guy addresses you tonight and for crying out loud, you just want a quiet shift.

What do you think of his white suit? With the garish LV logos? That it's tacky as fuck. That anyone with any sort of taste would never ever wear that. You keep your actual thoughts to yourself and instead just say it's fine.

That does nothing to subdue the blonde. He does stop talking to you though, and just mutters bitterly under his breath. You catch the words blind and tasteless.

His partner smirks at your response.

And isn't that a whole other kettle of fish because it's currently 2am and you're indoors and who the hell wears sunglasses right now. You think he's a douche of the highest calibre.

The smirk is wiped from his face when he asks for cigarettes and you ask for ID. He doesn't have it on him.

"No can do. No ID, no sale."

He leans aggressively into your space, and reveals his eyes peering over his sunglasses.

My god, what is up with this duo? One with the tacky suit, and this one with the ugly black contact lenses.

You don't budge and the guy is dragged out by the blonde cackling.

Ugh. That laugh gives you a headache for the rest of your shift.

.

.

You really wish customers would stop involving you in their conversation.

This one, who looks exactly like how you would imagine a SoundCloud rapper that has their mother following them and no one else, asks you to listen to his music.

He insists that he's good as the blonde girl rolls her eyes.

You listen to about 10 seconds and make up your mind.

He's wrong. He's very wrong. You want to suggest he gets checked out at the doctor because clearly his ears aren't working properly.

Instead, you mention you like Duke Pyeon, he's more your taste. Has he heard of him? It's the wrong thing to say though because this guy looks angrier than you've ever seen anyone.

"Don't start Vin, I've seen you listening to his music." The girl scoffs.

'Vin' shouts in indignation and storms off with his friend trailing closely behind.

.

.

"Can I help?" You ask with your customer service voice and customer service smile.

He has been standing in front of the hair dyes for a good ten minutes as his friend looks increasingly bored and you can't blame him.

"No thanks, I'm just browsing," he responds and you tell him you'll be just over there if he needs anything.

You kill some time playing on your phone, look up, and both of them are still in the exact same spot.

The one with the H on his neck looks about ready to tear his hair out.

"Come on bro, just pick one!"

"No Warren, this is important. I need it to suit my new aesthetics."

You shrug and return back to your kitty kat restaurant game.

.

.

"Cool glasses," you tell the guy walking around the store and he looks affronted at first before realising you're being sincere and gives you a small smile instead.

You wonder if you can pull off orange tinted glasses too or whether you'd just look like an idiot. It's probably the latter you decide when you ring up his energy drinks.

"I'm a boxer," he offers, as if you're judging the amount of caffeine he's going to slam down.

"Ok?"

"I need it for my training."

"Sure."

You've seen weirder purchases and weirder combinations. The people coming in looking frantic and buying a single plunger or pack of toilet paper never fails to make you chuckle.

To be honest the amount he's buying is a bit nuts, and you wonder if he's going to drink it all in one go. You probably wouldn't sleep for a year if it was you.

"Enjoy your training," you say, heaving and handing over the bag of 19 cans.

.

.

A mute blonde gestures at you

You try to use some sign language, but he looks at you as if you're crazy. At least you think he does but you can't see his eyes.

Somehow you're able to decipher he's lost his dogs. Four. Golden retrievers. And he asks if you have seen them.

(Huh. Do you have telepathy? Do you have the gift?)

You tell him no and he sprints out.

You spend the rest of your shift trying to move things with your newly discovered psychic powers.

Spoiler: you have zero powers. Zilch.

.

.

You think you might be having a stroke.

Because on what planet did this K-pop idol think the disguise would work. Cap and mask on but tufts of pink hair poking out and dressed completely in white.

It's like he's asking for attention and for people to ooh and aah over who that could be.

As he leaves, you shout that you can't wait for his next album. He turns around in complete shock that you recognised him, as if you solved the world's hardest puzzle.

It's a good job that DG has such a pretty face because what an idiot.

.

.

You hear two voices mention the words Daniel Park and your ears perk up, wondering if it's about your old colleague.

Nah. You're just being silly. It's not an uncommon name at all and too much of a coincidence.

"I haven't seen Daniel in ages! Have you heard from him, Zoe?"

"No," you see her friend shake her head from the corner of your eye.

The brown haired girl tilts her head in thought, "I wonder how Zack is doing too. I haven't seen him in so long."

"Ohhh~ you miss him!"

"O-of course I do! He's a friend!" She blushes bright red and you chuckle to yourself.

'Friend', sure.

For the rest of the shift, you reminisce about how you used to tiptoe around your feelings with your boyfriend, Taehoon, too.

[zippyskyfalls]

YA'LL I GOT AN EARLY RELEASE FOR THE VENGENCE SAGA

Honest review (Spoilers btw):

can't talk about it MUCH but I'Il try my best to review

these songs. l'I be at school for the listening party

but at least I already listened to the album

I'm not sorry for loving you: the vocals are beautiful,

you can hear how sad Calypso is and it's just chefs

kiss. Jorge obviously sounds GREAT. I love the

drums while she explains her entire life story for

being alone for 100 years (Odysseus is probably i in

the corner like "dude cool but, ljust wanna see my

wife-")

Also best part

"I wish you would lie and say-"

"I LOVE YOU!"

:..you do?"

"But not in the way that you want me too.."

Dangerous:

The start of the song is Ody going "I miss my crew

I miss them a lot. I'1I be back" of course TROY

IS AMAZING, HOLY SHIT!! As amazing as he is,

Chadybis and Get in The Water are my personal

favorites. But Troy still SLAYED, His instrumental is

different since the Lyre is Apollo's instrument now,

but it still sounds great

can't spoil this, but there's a pretty big plot twist (the

winions appear here so there's that)

Best part?

"If your plans so good, why did you wait to say it?"

"...WELL IT'S A LITTLE BIT-"

Chadybis: IT'S SO HARD TO TALK ABOUT THIS

WITHOUT SPOILING IT, l'II only reveal that the start is

Ody going "dude can we hurry this up, there's only 1

saga left". Ody just kinda acts like those Emoji's, you

know the one "erm, actually 9 & ". Also the rap part

kinda gave me Hamilton Vibes ngl.

Anyways after that happens

"There....I see it."

"GET IN THE WATER BI-"

Get in The Water: how do I describe Get in The

Water? IT'S FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!! I'm sending my

friends this. But yeah, you know how Jay mentions

Polites in every Saga to make us cry? Yeah. This is

the song. Stephen's vocals? AMAZING AS ALWAYS.

also noticed that before he sings, you can hear the

melody of "I can take the suffering from you" but a

bit faster.

"Now get in the water." CHILLS, LITERAL CHILLS.

Sorry ya'l, that's all l'l spoil

600 Strike: yall think l'"l tell you that much? You guys

have been too hyped for that for me to give it to you

that easily, I'I tell you this though:

Poseidon: "how will you sleep at night!?" practically dying

Ody: "next to my wife"

DAMN ODY THAT WAS FOUL

(Shoutout to my wonderful friend @protagaster check them out!!!)

[1eos]

I got the purple reader too! I hadn't thought about my taste like that honestly. Though I think the book recs didn't seem to interest me necessarily. (Or well, I just donnnt like Murakami :/ ) Do you have any book recs that you think would also suit this kinda style?

i thought i was being snooty when i wasn't vibing with any of the book recs but everyone else was like 'damn these recs are ASS'. like i saw ishiguro's never let me go on there and honest to god scrolled back up thinking the quiz was for summer reading 😭 and GOD i hateeeee murakami. ppl keep toting him as some kind of revolutionary but every time i try to read his shit its deadass just man making his objectification of women verbose and 'deep' but if only if you're like 17 and have no life experience idk.

but YES i do have some purple reader recs! the description focused on books being dream-like, innovative, pushing the envelope or being experimental so i'd say:

in the dream house by carmen maria machado - a memoir but packaged in a way that's more like a domestic horror short story anthology about how abuse escalates in a relationship is akin to a haunting in a way. not easy to explain but it's SO good and carmen maria machado just has a very dream-like way of writing

ring shout by p djeli clark - one of the most unique books ive read concept wise. its an alternate historical supernatural novel where in the mid 1900s the kkk is actually like a demonic clan and these black hunters are tasked with taking them out. and omg the main character has this recurring nightmare and there's a major reveal abt that and it's stayed with me FOREVER

a tale for the time being by ruth ozeki - the book that got me back into writing. ruth's a writer and lives on an island and finds a lunchbox on the beach that has the journal of a japanese girl named nao who is being bullied in school and wants to chronicle why she's gonna kill herself. and it's such a long lasting story abt not hope per se but the infinite amount of growth and resilience of the human spirit and how buddhism is the wave basically lol

the nine lives of rose napolitano by donna frietas - i've never encountered a book that focused on alternate timelines without being heavy into scifi like this one. the book starts with rose on the fritz with her husband bc she's never wanted a baby but he's now pressuring her to have one and from this one confrontation it explores all the different ways her life can splinter and it's so interesting bc it doesn't go the cliche 'this is the life where im happy with a baby and here's a life where i'm miserable without one' it truly explores the deeper aspects of her marriage and how rose can find contentment no matter what. i really liked it at the end

jungian symbolism in astrology by alice o howell - i never know if ppl ever check out my astro book recs BUT this one is SO purple book coded. its abt astrology but you don;t need to know much because she doesn't talk abt methods but rather breaking down the meaning of astrology symbols. and it's not in a classic format its written like letters from the author to a dear friend. AND it goes beyond the basic astrology shit and really breaks down the importance of symbols and connects astrology to carl jung's ideas and it was such an interesting read that changed how i look at a lot of things

the night guest by hildur knutsdottir - a short but bold psychological horror. idunn realizes she's been sleepwalking and things happen. this is very dream like and very cold. very sparse. in a good way. a lot of american horror writers overwrite so this one was interesting in that it was more bare bones. the ending and the the reality of the horror is left really open ended and on goodreads a lot of ppl didnt like that but i fawking loved it

there's no such thing as an easy job by kikuko tsumura - follows the main character as she goes thru 5 different jobs after getting burnt out and the pitfalls of each job as means of 'escaping' the jobs that cause burn out if that makes sense. all of the 5 jobs are pretty unconventional and the main character accepts that even tho these jobs are 'easier' than her old job there's always just something that makes even an easy job complicated.

the secret lives of color by kassia st. clair - this is a nonfiction book about colors! like literally how we got the names for colors how we got them etc etc. i read it a long time ago but i remember that it was formatted really uniquely and written well

room by emma donoghue - read this for my humanities lit class in college a while ago but i never forgot it because i don't think i've ever read a book from the pov of a child in this kind of situation. basically jack's 5 and he's lived in a single room his entire life with his mom bc theyve been held captive by this weird ass old man. and the whole book you're like okay the mom's actions are kinda weird what's going on and then the reality of the situation sinks in and it's like...oh! all from the pov of a child that literally has only ever existed in a single room

[baldurs-writers-3]

Wyll Ravengard: A Baldur's Gate 3 Fanfic Rec List

This week, we have Wyll Focused fics! Check under the cut for ten incredible fics all about our favorite folk hero, Wyll Ravengard. And as always, comment and kudos if you like them!

Blood-seeking Blade by specimenbag (24809, Teen) Content Notes: Canon-Typical Violence Pairings: Astarion/Wyll

The end of the world must be nigh, Wyll thought, if Wyll of the Griffins spares a monster and lets him be a bloody traveling companion. Or, the series where Wyll is a Witcher, and Astarion is the vampire he saved

Reccer says: I love literally everything about this AU. The author includes helpful notes to explain witcher terminology so its very accessible. The vibes are immaculate and the characterizations are so well done.

Nothing Like the Sun by odessacastle (159772, Mature) Content Notes: None Pairings: Astarion/Wyll

Wyll and Astarion meet before his exile! Fate wants things to proceed down a similar path, however.

Reccer says: It's neat to see two canon companions have the 'oh shit we knew each other before this tadpole bullshit!!' that you normally just see more OC focused, it makes for very different starting interactions. Also man Wyll is bad at vampire spotting.

the blade falls by PurpleCatGhost (4097, Teen) Content Notes: None Pairings: Wyll & Friends

Wyll used to know his own limits fairly well, but that was before the tadpole. Besides that, having friends you can rely on is also a new experience, though at least this one is a nice one

Reccer says: I really enjoy Wyll realizing just a little bit too late that his injuries are worse than he thought, and then everyone's response to that being "How dare you not tell us you needed help >:("

Bouquet of the Frontiers by Tavylia_Sin (5796, General) Content Notes: Pairings: Wyll & Friends

Wyll tries to spend the tiefling party off on his own. His friends decide they would much rather adorn him in flowers and affirmations instead.

Reccer says: Very sweet. The found family vibes are impeccable

Hells Escape Pact by ushauz (17613, Teen) Content Notes: None Pairings: Karlach/Wyll, Astarion/Wyll, Astarion/Karlach, Astarion/Karlach/Wyll

A bit of a 'bad end' for three of the companions. Wyll is a proper demon type in Hell, Karlach never got out, and Astarion got sacrificed in the ritual. What now?

Reccer says: Bad end doesn't have to be bad forever!

Window to the Soul by normal_thoughts_official (653, Mature) Content Notes: depersonalization Pairings:

little snippets from wyll's childhood, through his time as the blade and how he sees himself as a person (and not)

Reccer says: for a short story it packs a damn punch, left me emotional

Saviour Complex by fantailsock (12246, Mature) Content Notes: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Pairings: Wyll and Friends, minor Astarion/Wyll

Five times someone helped Wyll out and one time he helped himself.

Reccer says: I'm always a sucker for found family and the team forcing someone to learn how to value themselves, and this fic is perfect for that

Less Than Ideal by jeejaschocolate (5021, General) Content Notes: some internalized ableism and drinking to cope Pairings: Astarion/Wyll

Being burned by hellfire left Wyll with poor eyesight in his solitary eye. Astarion notices. Of course, he can’t keep his opinions to himself.

Reccer says: Lovely exploration of vulnerability

a story better than the real thing by not_whelmed_yet (1100, General) Content Notes: N/A Pairings: N/A

Wyll is alone in the woods, in the wilderness, and the heroes of his youth spoke only of victory so maybe he can convince himself of it, too.

Reccer says: a wonderful character study of Wyll as the Blade of Frontiers - creating a storybook persona so he can try and distract himself from the miserable realities of his current situation. very sad. very fascinating.

And then we have three recs for the following: Allemande by adrezarach (7255, Explicit) Content Notes: None Pairings: Wyll/Tav, Wyll & Ulder Ravengard

Wyll is developing a crush on Tav and comes to realize that they’ve met before, when they were amongst the nobility of Baldur’s Gate! An introspective character study of Wyll, touching on how his life intersects with Tav’s over the course of nine years. He dances, he dreams, and he thinks about the storybook hero he wants to be.

Reccer #1 says: I really enjoyed this read and the author has a Wyll voice that feels very distinctive and true to character. Reccer #2 says: The author has a distinctive and poignant Wyll-voice, and the contrast between the timeframes of the fic is really interesting. Reccer #3 says: The author has such a strong grasp of Wyll’s character and a distinctive narrative voice that suits him really well. I love how they played with past and present so that the reader can see his changing thoughts over his life pre and post pact. It’s a strong piece as a stand-alone, but it’s clear the author has long term plans for this characterization and this dynamic. One of my favorite wyll-centric wylltav pieces.

The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ!

Next week, we’ll be back with the evergreen trope, Misunderstandings!

[chunkymamatam]

hello! I hope ur doing well when u read this. I wasn't originally gonna ask, but after seeing others ask about ur twst dr I got really curious- What is Grim like? Or really just anyone that wasn't asked about/mentioned much. (The heartslabyul gang, the scarabia duo, etc..) that's probably a lot tho, so please answer what you want to (if at all)

Also, I'm really glad I found ur blog! Ur a big inspiration and I'm really thankful you share your stories -and art- on here

Thank you so much! I'm glad that I can do that for people honestly. It makes my heart very happy ❤

Grimm is a little shit. He's a lot better now then when we first met though. His grades are still ass and he's too stubborn to let me help him study. Very excitable and cute. He'll never admit it but he likes the back of his ears scratched and he'll pretend to be angry with me. He's just embarrassed haha

This little mfer can EAT like... I don't know where all of it went type shit. Where tf did all that tuna that was double his weight go? who tf knows honestly. He usually curls up with me in my bed in Ramshackle, unless he's mad and trying to prove a point cuz I told him to get a job if he wants that much tuna.

Man I'm making myself sad. My Grimm is locked up in STYX rn and I miss my little man... I'm kicking Idia's ass when I see him. Not too hard tho it's not actually his fault. Maybe a Chancla to the back of the head max. Then starts the verbal beat down lmfao

Cater is chill but he's really detached. Like.. His smiles are actually really fake and the vibe is slightly off. Like he is actually enjoying himself but he's waiting for the other shoe to drop. Real but bestie.. That's not healthy. He forced me to get a Magicam so we could follow each other and I could "get myself out there" or some shit lol I don't mind though. All of my other friends are following me too. I got into some drama and bro was lowkey laughing at me and eating this shit up.

I'm not necessarily friends with Trey but he seems nice enough. A bit mischievous when he wants to be but over all kind. His arms are fucking built dude. Like I know it comes with being a baker and kneading that dough all the time but damn.. He's a damn good baker too. Those tarts smelled so good sob. He was the first and only one other than Grimm to actually come check on me directly after Riddle's overblot. Man looked so concerned.

Riddle is a lot more chill now and we're friends..? Idk We don't hang out too much but I do keep pink shirts in stock in Ramshackle for his dorm members. It started with Ace, then Deuce, then some random guy, and one thing led to another and he started escorting these hoes to Ramshackle himself. Like I mean he's yelling at them, red in the face all the way up to my door and when I open the shit somehow his face is back to just regular rosy cheeked white boy. He also brings back the shirts, washed and in perfect condition himself. I think we're friends? Idk he's so prim and proper with his language with everyone its hard to tell. But I'm also autistic so I could be missing something. He gets playful every once in a while. In my DR its an actual college but he's a prodigy and started college early so he's only like 18. Slay honestly.

Deuce is such a sweetheart but he's kinda dumb sometimes. It's okay though, he's trying his best and all you really gotta do is work with him on his level and work up from there. I have successfully explained that not all eggs are fertilized. He's also more willing to ask me for help than say Grimm or Ace. Especially after everything with Azul. He loves his mom and he's very easily impressed. Very quizzical and honestly I feel like if he had some accommodations or was taught in a slightly different way he'd have better grades. His PE grade is always an A tho so.. Slay former delinquent slaaayyyy

Ace... uhg. I love his ass /p but god I wanna punch him sometimes. He's such a twat waffle, all bro does is be argumentative, be a bit of a perv and try to steal my food. I have almost stabbed him. My food aggression is crazy when he's around. He's funny though so he's got that going for him. Bro crashed on my couch when Riddle took his magic and kicked him out the dorm and was basically like "we sleeping in the same bed" NO YOU WILL SLEEP ON THE COUCH. He's pretty stubborn but he's also helpful or at least tries to be when you really need him. Like Floyd made me have a seizure (by accident he still feels really bad don't come for him please 😭) and Ace was right there with everyone else trying to make sure I was gonna be okay. He even hesitated to go back to Heartslabyul right away. He wanted to walk me back to Savanaclaw but I didn't want him to get in trouble. So he clearly cares. He's just an asshole.

I'm worried Tumbr won't let me post this if I keep going cuz the length limit so I'll stop there for now ❤

[lovebugmusings]

Having thoughts about PolyTransForce141 meeting reader and like not explicitly telling them they are trans straight away because they want to get to know them and get the general vibe before they bring out that personal information. Imagine how they'd tell reader? Super chill and just drop it into conversation somewhere? A rapid reveal during a wickedly sloppy makeout in a five way session? I just want reader to be so affirming for them, wanting to learn how to be the best partner by understanding each member's unique needs and preferences, just knowing they'd be so good in return..

(I tried keeping this pretty gender neutral but the reader is afab.)

there are two ways it could go

the first, they've all discussed it and when your entrance to the relationship is more serious, more solid, they sit you down much like when they first asked if you'd join, and let you know that hey, they're all trans. you adjust any expectations and wet dreams you have to fit the new anatomy knowledge

the second though, is the more relaxed. dropping it in conversations.

I love the little ramble i wrote for simon so I'm reinserting it here. you're making out with him, grinding on his lap and suddenly realise you aren't feeling a hardening cock. okay, it hurts a little that he doesn't seem to be enjoying it, so you check in. you ask

"hey, are you not into this? not into me? because we can stop it's okay I just... I need to know" and simon is stumbling over himself to let you know

"no, sweetheart, I'm enjoying this, enjoying you. I just can't get hard. got no cock." and he's sliding one of your hands between you, into his pants, and you get to feel his wet cunt and twitching bottom growth. "glad I haven't got one when I'm around you, the wet mess I make o' my boxers is much easier to hide than a boner"

simon is so smug about the fact that that make-out session turned into you eating him out before he had you ride his thigh. the shit eating grin he gives johnny and kyle when they see him walk in clearly having just cum, and you shyly holding his arm

the next you find out about is kyle. gaz just wants to get in before johnny because he knows the scot will have smoke coming out of his ears if he finds out now 2 of them know how you taste.

you're lounging on the sofa, curled up reading or scrolling, and kyle drops on top of you, between your thighs and kissing your sternum while you grumble about him tossing your book/phone.

"know you've played with Simon's cunt, but I promise mine's prettier." you splutter a little at the bluntness before you brain actually clicks to what he's said. "'least let our clits kiss. got something she might like"

it doesn't take long for your shorts and panties to be thrown beside your book, and kyle's thrown not far behind. in the movement of it all, he ends up lying back on the couch, long fingers pulling his lips apart so you can see it, the piercing on the underside of his bottom growth.

"been told it feels like heaven dragged against s clit." and it doesn't take much more than that for your to shift one thigh over gaz's and start grinding your cunt over his, mewling whenever the piercing catches at your clit. it's wet and messy and even more so when kyle sits up, pulling your cunt harder against his while he kisses you. you both ignore the way johnny pitifully whines as he steps into the living room before he's dragged back out by simon.

johnny has no real decorum or tact when he finally gets to bed you. and gets to bed you makes it sound so sweet. no he throws you over his shoulder and carries you to the bedroom while you playfully pinch at his lovely ass

"nae waiting any more. Lt and gaz had their fun wit' ye and I canne wait. sight o you n kyle's wet cunts haunts me. made me made a mess o mah hand"

the panties you were wearing had better not have been a favourite because they're gone. sides torn so he could drag the fabric harshly over your clit while he removed the damn garment. he positions you easily, sitting you on his face ("sit, bon. if I die under this bonnie cunt, it's a good death. tha's it. all yer weight") where he immediately pulls your clit into his mouth with a strong and wet suck. you catch yourself on his thighs as you fall forward, your eyes zeroing in on his crotch.

you watch for a moment, waiting for the twitch of a cock, and when you don't see it, you quickly slide your hand into his boxers and pinch his clit. you shove his boxers down, barely getting them to his thighs, before you drop, lapping at his cunt. he adjusts, raising his knees to give you better access, and two fingers quickly join your tongue inside of him. johnny lets out a broken moan when your fingers find his labial piercing and give him a light pull. just a nudge but it makes his little cock twitch under your tongue

John has a proper, sit down conversation with you, but mostly because he's had bottom surgery, though he kept his vaginal opening. basically he's got a cock-length clit with a pump*, and kept his vagina.

he wants to tell you this before because he knows you've played with his boys, know your way around a boy-cunt with bottom growth by now, but his is a little different! mostly the same but he can use the pump to have a cock and while he can't cum inside of you (you give a joking pout and he can't help but give your downturned lips a short kiss), he will definitely feel you cum around it.

to "make up for not being able to cum inside", you tell John that after he fucks you, you want to eat him out. he can control everything about it, but you want to feel him cum on your mouth. it's a done deal, you barely finish the sentence before he's grabbing your hand and tugging you toward the bedroom.

~✧

I researched it lightly and there is at least 1 surgery clinic that can do the phalloplasty without a vaginosectomy!! so you can have a cock and a vagina! which is very interesting. I honestly just wanted to get more information on bottom surgery and found that out which is very cool!

*someone pointed out to me I got muddled up, so this is more the simplified version price uses to describe it, not what it actually is!

[midnight1nk]

So, this week's episode...

[spoilers below cut]

oh boy, the first episode (+ review) of the year! i am SO EXCITED what they have in store for us for all of 2025, i'm SCREAMING!

(the following is my live reaction:)

god i missed the intro

"...but you can watch the other episodes" no no it hits different

OH we're doing transitions, huh?

he's so silly 💙

MARIO HI

quite a resolution but mario please drink water

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING, FOUR

just love the small bits of smooth animation, fantastic

HOLY SHIT FUEGO you came back

and we still got James to voice him, let's gooo!!!

well uh, i didn't expect that song

WHEEZE he's going full-on Mary Poppins, bye bye

if you're gonna make it, don't jinx it mario

sure, we ran out of water, but at least Luigi is supportive :)

HUH what do you mean we're sold out of water? how convenient

...mario don't you dare even think about it

NO NO NOOO

and it exploded, wow

oh HI SMG3!!

*inhales* Three... honey.... can i ask why?

is it bad to say that this feels out of place? idk maybe that's just me

then again, welcome to the SMG4: where literally anything can happen

also great to see the Crew here 💙 hi to all

enjoy the salt! :D yummy yummy

goddamn we started a whole dry-out apocalypse

*ghostbusters theme* 🎶 when it's the end of the world and you're about to die, who are you gonna call? the military! 🎶

worse than death? oh, tummy aches. understandable have a great day! *mary-poppins out of there*

i find it peculiar that we're getting a lot of moments with jesus hmmmmm....

not even God could save us

desperate times call for desperate measures

...well all that just happened and still nothing? maybe throw some explosives to crack the bottle?

damn Three, whatever's going on with this idea of yours, it's not working

but it's nice to have Eggdog helping his dad out

y'know Mario can be a great salesman (learned from the best by Nintendo)

eh close enough, welcome back Sonic Adventure 1 *explodes*

and you got your water Mario, i see no problems here :)

oh plot twist! i didn't think we were gonna get another scene with Fuego tbh

🎶you drink. must drink. you need your zinc—🎶 oh Mario c'mon, that song was really getting into my head

and as always, a chaotic ending

Congrats to Axel (who's indeed here on Tumblr) for your art featured at the end credits 🎉 love your Saiko art 💙

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

I gotta say, this has been a good start for 2025! I'm so glad the Team was able to get a break before then (which they honestly deserved) and now we have a silly little episode today, you just gotta stick with the chaotic vibes of the show :D

And WOW Fuego's return was not on my bingo card but here we are. That was a nice surprise. Plus, some of the creative choices made really went well with its funny moments. It just spices it up, y'know.

Just learned that Shadow sang the song bit at the beginning of the episode and voiced the one fish guy (I FREAKIN KNEW THAT VOICE SOUNDED FAMILIAR) which is awesome fun fact!

And apparently there was an extended scene that was trimmed for today's episode by Star, that you can see the full version (here's the link for you to check it out!)

It feels great to watch an episode that feels like it belongs in the show itself. And no, i haven't forgotten the Dasani x SMG4 lol (ah yes, the true ship of the show) Like I said, it's a good start and I'm so excited what they got for us bc I know the Team's scheming something, I can FEEL it. 4 dollars, bet on it!

And an extra certified point from me FOR NOT ADDING FLAREGLOW OMG I WAS WILLING TO ALLOW IT IF IT WAS GONNA BE A JOKE BUT IF IT WAS A LEGIT SONG I'M GONNA GO INSANE GONNA GO CRAZY I WILL TAKE THE DRINKING WATER SONG ANY DAY THAN THAT PIECE OF—

thanks for stopping by and remember: numbers go first! :) and I'll see you in the next one!!

[respectthepetty]

Pit Babe Colors Ep. 12 The Black Parade Episode

I'm challenging myself with this show and seeing how good my color skills really are, so I'm doing my normal thing of watching it double-speed on mute, but now, the captions are off also. It's just colors and vibes here. Y'all done told be EVERYTHING, so I know the entire plot now.

THAT WAS A TEAR! KENTA IS CRYING!

I thought it wasn't just sweat last week but knowing he is actually crying as he thinks about their past did immediate damage to me, and now they are ALL standing there in the dark with Way and Pete highlighted by the blue, and, and, and . . . Kentana are you gonna die? You and Waymond are stressing me the fuck out!

Now that I know they are both enigmas, I can't see them the same. Are they using their superpowers on each other right now? Are they reading each other's minds? Are they trying to figure out how to get Kentana back, so they can make this poly?

Kentana, how many times are you going to have this man spit in your face before you realize that he ain't shit? Go to your room, turn on Billie Eilish's "Happier Than Ever" and really hear it. "Never told anyone anything bad cause that shit's embarrassing. You were my everything, and all that you did was make me fucking sad."

The blue keys in front of the red product placement is all I need to be reminded that this show refuses to allow me peace.

Shocking absolutely fucking nobody, Kentana did not listen to "Happier Than Ever"

And now someone is gonna die because there are only so many ways for you and Waymundo to redeem yourselves, and if you have Jeffrey in all black, I'm worried it's gonna be your funeral we will be planning next, Kentana.

There is one episode left and I am death gripping the one time Vegas' Hedgehog wore blue because I will never get it again. I hate them.

Real question: Is Barbie pregnant? I know he is sad Charles is "dead" *eye roll* but he is taking pills, getting fruit thrown at him, and staring out into space. I would love to believe he is going through his Edward-left-Bella-so-she-was-super-duper-sad era, but now that I know pregnancy is on the table, that's all I can see.

Oh, thank goodness! Someone actually has a tracker on his phone! But Kimberly has been kidnapped, caught up in human trafficking, and is now beating up children. Bro, what was your life before it all went to shit? Do you ever call your mom and tell her these are your friends now? Are you even still racing? Nevermind. Go catch those kids.

The problem with black is the shades. Waymond's jacket looks green. Peter's pants look blue. And yet it still feels like we are preparing for a funeral. A real one this time. Not fake like someone else's *cough* Charles *cough*

Kentana, are you betraying Jeffrey as Big Red watches? Or are you asking him how Peter's been? Has he been well, without you? Is he dating anyone? What is his status with Way? Well, Jeffrey wouldn't know, but Peter x Waymond could be poly if you get out of that fucking house and stop kidnapping people!

Going from Kentana in that House of Horrors to Pete looking like this makes me understand why Kentana is out there kidnapping people. I'd feel some type of way too if my childhood crush looked like this and was getting chummy with a dude who looked like Way Way. Damn.

What the hell is this?! The cover of a boy band album? A meeting to discuss poly? The Thai version of Barbie where Ken(tana) explains why he won't leave the Mojo Dojo Casa House? AND WHY ARE ALL OF YOU WEARING BLACK?! Someone is gonna die.

Did Big Red know Kentana went to see Barbie and the other Kens?! Was he sent there by Big Red?! Kentana is really breaking my heart on his knees hugging this man like this. I want to slap Kentana all the time, but I also want to hug him and tuck him into bed with a moon nightlight calmly lighting up the room.

Let's stick him in a video game, so he can learn to love himself.

Push him down the stairs, Kentana! Do it. PLEASE! Shoulder check his ass at least.

Oh Lord, NO! Waymond, do not take a fucking bullet for anyone. You canNOT die by Whiny Winifred's bullet. I refuse to let you go out like that. You finally used your powers for good, but this is not the time to die.

Y'ALL DIDN'T EVEN GRAB THE BAG!

This is Mission Kim Possible all over again! How do you not grab the damn bag?! Waymundo looks so damn good in his suit, so thank God he is still alive, but what the fuck guys?! One job! SECURE. THE. BAG.

I hate how good everyone looks in black because I keep swinging through emotions. I'm terrified for everyone yet very attracted to everyone. All the guys connected to Big Red have been in black this episode regardless if it was their color or not, so I'm hoping that means the funeral will be Big Red's.

A cult meeting, in this economy? Villains make the dumbest decisions.

Waymond has some white on . . . over black. Please Mary, mother of God, do not let him do something stupid.

Alan, did you just say "eff them kids"? No. Not my Alan. He'll be back for them. Right. Right?

Peter is gonna Regina George his way into this Halloween party that he was not invited to just to cause some havoc. Mad respect.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?!

How the hell did Charles get there?! Did Barbie's dad tell him to go to the cult meeting? Dressed like that though? Did his spidey sense go off? So many questions, but all I know is Kentana better let them go, so he doesn't have to die.

Whiny Winifred better not get better at aiming in the final episode because I still need both of these two to wear blue TOGETHER.

WAYMOND, NO!!!!!!!!!!

Good to know it only took being kidnapped twice and (possibly) someone dying for Jeffrey to finally commit to the blue.

My nerves are wrecked. There was too much black this episode. Someone is going to die, and as much as I want it to be Big Red, I just don't feel good that Kentana is still on his bullshit, and Waymond keeps jumping in front of guns. Peter needs both of his boyfriends to live.

Also, Barbara, I already know you are immediately going to hug Charles next week, instead of having a moment to be pissed all the way off at him like you should be, so I'm going to start meditating on that right now. I've been mad at Charles the entire season, so I'll hold this grudge for both of us in the finale.

[dxwnfxll]

Heyy!! How are you?<3

I just found your blog and I'm so happy I did! So I decided to leave a request for some hc's of the main 4 eddsworld boys finding out the reader is a stoner? Like they'll just get into the house and see the reader faded af and just being extra chill abt everything??

If you don't do multiple character hc's, then the same premise but only for Tord. Thank you lovely :))

Hiya !! I'm doing swell ! Hope ya are to :) !!

And awesome HC idea totally gonna write it out

Hope ya enjoy it ! (And sorry for the wait i've been busy busy !!)

The eddsworld boys with a stoner reader

(gender neutral reader)

Tord

- So Tord is DEF a stoner, you can't tell me other wise. So when he casually arrives home one day a lil earlier than the others and finds reader faded as hell he just fucking laughs.

- He def gets high with reader, he has a collection of funny lil bongs including a anime girl one he spent a shit ton of money on.

- Reader got munchies? He's got ya, he's got his own lil munchie stash in his room.

- Readers first time getting high? He'll call you stupid but help you through it, make sure you don't freak tf out

- You and him probably sit on the couch looking like idiots laughing at the dumbest shit (probably a dumb commercial Tord keeps rewinding back over and over)

Edd

- I don't see Edd as a stoner but he's okay with the 'lifestyle', though when he came back after a cola run and found Reader staring at the ceiling snickering here and there he's very concerned

- " Did Tord give you something from his stash? TORD !! "

- When he figures out YOU are ALSO a stoner he's like " oh "

- He's kinda curious about what it's like sometimes, especially since he's been casually watching you/Tord getting high randomly and looking like y'all are having the time of your lives.

- Careful if you actually let him get high with you, He's gonna freak tf out and get some bad munchies

- If he never gets high with you though he just kinda keeps an eye on you to make sure you're okay

Matt

- He's not a stoner, doesn't even know what a stoner is. So when he comes home and smells something 'bad' in the air he thinks it's a damn fire

- Idk why he thought it was a fire he just did, he sees smoke coming under your door and grabs a bucket and before you even know it he's thrown water in your room...on you.

- He killed your vibe

- He does apologize though at least

Tom

- He used to be a stoner, he kinda stopped after he got into Smirnoff and didn't wanna be juggling both y'know?

- When he comes home and sees you on the couch he just holds in a lil laugh and goes " i know that face, someones tripping balls"

- He MAKES you give him a hit on the blunt/bong/whatever (or an edible if you prefer edibles)

- He's a pro at this shit so he's chilling, and hopefully you are too. But a few mins in he'll get up and grab some snacks for you two.

- He isn't a very giggly high when y'all two are high but he's more 'idiotic', he'll find random photos and think they're the funniest shit known to man kind. He's also very hungry and thirsty when he gets high

- Tord is NOT allowed during y'alls high time

- He takes big breaks when getting high, so if you're a stoner that does it daily or day after day he's not gonna smoke with ya every day. He smokes like maybe once or twice a week? It really depends

Bonus:

Eduardo

- He judges you, but when he sees how chill you are when high he decides to take a hit. He gets mad when he doesn't get high from one hit

- Excuse him he's a lil dumb, you tell him it takes more than one hit and he just grumbles before taking another hit

- Once he's high with you he just sits there, you probably gotta check on him to make sure he's okay

- After that time he gets high with you whenever he can, dude probably needs it tbh

Jon

- He doesn't really understand but he's cool with it ! :D

Mark

- Mark prefers to not be around whenever you get high, it's not that he hates you being a stoner he just isn't into smoking and all that. He does warn you about the bad stuff with smoking though womp womp

Paul

- Dude doesn't care, he probably finds you high in the barracks at the red army base. He probably sits with you and smokes his own cigarettes just chilling with you

- " everybody needs a break every now and then, just don't be high while your work yeah ? "

- If you ask for anything to help get you down from your high so you can work he'll usually help (if he's in a good mood)

Patryck

- Judging

- He doesn't like that you're high during work, doesn't like the smell and doesn't like how you act while high

- gets a lil annoyed if he has to help you walk around or anything

- def never getting high with you, but he's def had a contact buzz before

Yippe ! Hope you enjoyed sorry if it seemed rushed at all

[bloopitynoot]

Reading TGCF: Chapter Two

For those who don't know, I am reading TGCF for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag Bloopitynoot reads TGCF. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read BUT if you followed along with my SVSSS read, the rules and vibe are the same.

Today's tea: Masala Chai!

I am so excited my ink replacement came in for my pen so I can finally use the fancy boy again. The last two chapters have been gel pen and it just isn't the same.

Knowing this though- ignore all of the ink smudges XD I got too eager with the new ink and it is a mess LOL

Let's get into chapter two!

I was nervous that for some reason this chapter was going to be a POV switch or something BUT no! Fuck yeah let's get into the bride eating monster quest! p47

okay but the fact that out of 1000's of weddings only 17ish brides went missing makes me think that these brides didn't want to get married and opted out voluntarily. p 47

Xie Lian definitely: thank fuck these two are at least competent. p48

Honestly I am convinced that his weird way of doing things RE: sleeping in the bushes, was part of what led to the happenstance of his ascensions. Like this guy taking the untraveled path just caused him to bump into things that got him merits. p50 (my running theory at least).

Mu Qing is SO dramatic, "But when Mu Qing saw that his statues had been hideously sculpted, he would either secretly destroy them and make people start over, or appear in dreams to express his displeasure. This went on for a long time until the grand believers learned that they had to find an artisan master who could sculpt beautifully" p51

This temple feels off. Like what is going on with this woman with the torn skirt. pp54-55

RIP Nan Feng's social skills p55

omg. This poor guy just wants to sincerely help her with her skirt situation but she (rightfully given the circumstances, girl same, i'd choose the bear in this scenario) thinks the half-naked Xie Lian is a freak about to do horrible shit to her. p55

Nan Feng & Fu Yao seeing Xie Lian's wrecked torso: omg who did you fight???? Xie Lian: the wind lol p56

oh shit and he has a mark of the cursed shackle? (I'm assuming his neck? or are there more because he was banished more than once??). p57

By lol. This is so silly. Now I know why the chapter was titled "Tremendous Masculinity". This is so embarrassing, what an oops. p59

When I was reading this part I thought that the "sin" was the altar in the temple breaking when Nan Feng and Fu Yao were fighting but NOPE, Xie Lian is over here like "damn. That was a perfectly good steamed bun that landed on the floor". p62

okay okay okay! I take back my previous belief that the brides were willingly leaving because HOLY SHIT girl's HEAD just fell off!!!!! 65

This chapter was too short!

I wanted to get into the bride snatching but we had a temple side side quest. This is fine, because now we have an actual monster a foot, but now it means I have to wait until TOMORROW to read about it.

Until then!