#i’ve interviewed for medical as well (receptionist) but didn’t get it

[fingertipsmp3]

Guys I have a job interview at a law office and I don’t have a single fucking thing to wear

[kingcons]

Time tics by, a helluva boss FanFiction (part one of a collection of connected oneshots)

Words: 1,459

Genre: slice of life comedy with mild hurt/comfort.

Ok, this is it, your first day as an assassin.

You can do this.

You can do this.

“Millie, let’s do this.” The imp said excitedly as he swigged the last of his coffee. Millie giggled at her husband’s enthusiasm. “Alright honey, it’ll be good to be a little early I ‘spose. But uh, do we really need to be a whole thirty minutes early?” He glanced at the clock. Shit, she was right. Maybe it was a bit too early?

“You say that, but what if this is a test! What if we arrive on time and he fires us!” Moxxie began pacing back and forth on the kitchen floor tiles. “Even more so, what if we get there and we get into traffic and he’s gone home by then! What then Millie!” He grabbed his wife’s face dramatically. She laughed a little and cupped his face with her own hands. “Sweetheart, if that fucker does any of those things? We can find a new employer. It ain’t that big a deal.” He removed her face from his palms, wringing his hands in worry. “I know that on a logical and realistic level that’s most likely true, but the tiny percentage that you’re wrong really makes me think I’m gonna fuck this up.” He admitted with a sheepish grin. Millie noticed his eye twitching and his fists start to clench. She sighed. “Ok, if it’ll make ya feel better we can be early.” Moxxie calmed down noticeably at that. “Shit, my eye is acting up again.” He complained. “I told you, darlin’, we can afford the doctors?” Millie suggested. He shook his head. “I’ve asked them before actually. They said it’s stress related. I didn’t mention my other involuntary issues, but I kind of just assumed they are too.” Millie nodded. “Well I’m at least glad it ain’t nothin’ serious. Now come on, we got an all new job to go to!”

“Blitz! Get the fucking door already!” A woman’s voice boomed from inside. The two imps shared a concerned look. A crash could be heard on the other side of the door. “Okay, who the FUCK put greenie down on the floor!?” A male voice this time. “Stop complaining about your shitty plastic horses and answer the fucking door!” The woman again. And a gasp. “How dare you loona! I’ll have you know my plastic horses are an essential reason this company runs as well as it does!”

The door swung open, with a tall, long horned imp now facing the couple. “Mah-mah- Moxxie and Millie, Sir? For the mah- job interview?” Moxxie introduced him and his wife. “Oh… and I’m guessing you heard all that back there?” Millie nodded very enthusiastically. “May we come in, Blitzo, was it?” He shook his finger at her. “Nah sweet cheeks, the o is silent.” Furrowing his brow, Moxxie pointed at Blitzo. “Excuse me sir, what did you just call my wife?” Blitzo grinned deviously. “Oh, you two are a thing are you? Nice, how long is his wiener, is it short?”

Millie laughed a little, while the other glared at the taller. “That is totally inappropriate! And for your information, no it’s fucking not!” Moxxie huffed. He hadn’t even realised it yet but he had stormed inside. Millie catching up to him. Beginning to stamp his hoof and flap his hand, millie gave the still one a gently squeeze. Blitzo watched the two of them and smiled. “Hey, you haven’t met my daughter Loonie! Loona get in here!” Millie’s eyes seemed to sparkle. “Oooo! A little girl in the office! That’s fuckin’ adorable!” Blitzo rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, close mills, can I call you mills? But no cigar.” After a groan, there was loud stomping as a teenage hellhound busy with her phone flicked through presumably some form of social media showed up. “‘Sup, I’m loona. The receptionist I guess.”

“A pleasure to mah- meet you miss loona. I’m Moxxie, a new assassin here.” Blitzo turned around. “Hey wait a fuckin’ minuet, bitch boy, how do you know I’m hiring you two little ball busters?” Millie grinned. “Because, Blitz, we are your best choice. No one can beat Mox’s sharp shootin’ skills and me when I’m wieldin’ an axe!” She chirruped. The boss stroked his chin. “That so, huh? Welp, can’t argue with that. You’re hired!” Moxxie blinked. “Wait, what?” Blitzo sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I said you’re hired, short stack, what you deaf too? You got two disabilities?” Millie was smiling but gave him a warning look, Blitzo holding up his hands in surrender as a response. “No, I heard you. But really? Just like that? You don’t need to see how we are in the field or anything first?” Blitzo shook his head. “Do you know how hard it is for an imp to start a fucking business? Well, I’ll tell ya. It’s harder than my dick when I imagine it in your ass Moxxie. I mean, we’re all low in terms of hierarchy in hell. And naming it I.M.P was a fucking power move. So what do ya say, you in?” The couple looked at each other. Millie with pleading eyes before Moxxie sighed. “Fine. Mah- we’ll work with you. If you stop imagining your Satan dammed dick in my ass.” He pleaded. The taller chuckled. “No promises Mox!”

After getting a tour of the office, Millie and Loona began chatting while Moxxie and Blitzo discussed hours.

“This all looks good to me, Sir. Friday off too? Suits us both just fine -Mah-“ Moxxie said with a dramatic flinch. The flinching clenched and twisted his face painfully. “Sorry.” Moxxie apologized. “Tends to happen sometimes.” He shrugged. Blitzo simply stared. Then, seemingly out of the blue asked

“Do you have a disability?” Moxxie blinked, and opened his mouth ready to yell out how inappropriate and offensive that comment was. But his new boss held up his left hand indicating him to be quiet. “No, I’m being serious for a sec here. Are you disabled? Cause those,” he pointed at Moxxie’s twitching eye. “Those look an awful lot like tics.” Moxxie raised an eyebrow. “You what?”

Blitz chuckled. “You know, tics, involuntary movements that both are a pain in your ass and cause pain in your ass?” Moxxie sat there, jaw hanging low. “There’s… there’s a name for them?!” He exclaimed. Blitz nodded. “Yep! I got ‘em too! They’ve been calm today but I’ve also been suppressing them which’ll really fuck me over later but eh, it’s whatever.” Moxxie’s eyes began to water. The taller paled. “Oh- um, fuck I’m not good with crying. Did I overstep a line or is this just like- a medical problem you have?” He stammered. Moxxie smiled and wiped his eyes on his sleeve. “The second one, sir. I’ve been struggling with them my whole life. I can’t believe that other people experience them too. It probably seems like nothing to you-“

“No, it’s not that at all,” Blitzo cut him off. “I completely understand, Moxxie. I understand how hard tics are to deal with. They’re hard…” Moxxie nodded.

“Just like my dick in your ass.”

“Refrain, sir! Wait! You said you could suppress them, how do you do that?” Blitzo gritted his teeth. “It’s not that easy, Mox. I can’t teach you it’s just an ability people with tics or tic disorders have. Plus they’re major, major downsides to suppression including dangerous consequences if done, like, too much. Best way I can describe it is like, not scratching a persistent itch for hours. The itch sometimes lessens, sometimes you can’t feel it at all, but it’s always just kind of there. Until after hours and hours you’ve gotta just- scratch? Does that make sense?” Moxxie snickered. “Hey, I never said I was a linguistics expert here!” Moxxie shook his head. “No, no it makes perfect sense. Thank you, sir.” Blitzo nodded.

“Alright, that’s too wholesome and nice for my liking let’s get to planning some kills!” He suddenly exclaimed to Moxxie, grinning. But Moxxie was smiling right with him.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

TWD 11x07: Details

All right, let's talk details for 11x07.

***As always, spoilers abound below for this episode. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

Maggie’s group:

I talked about how important it was that Elijah's sister was a walker that he couldn't find her. During this first exchange in the woods, we also learn that Maggie really is out for revenge. We’ve all felt like this was the case, and there was more to her wanting to go back to Meridian than just to get food supplies. At this part, she says, "we have to get them. All of them." So, she's really probably not going to be willing to go back to Alexandria and all the reapers are dead. Clearly, that's going to cause some problems.

However, it comes from sympathy for her people and what they went through at the hands of the Reapers.

At this part, just before it shifts to the opening credits, we also see a walker with the long dark beard. Because they knew the first walker Maggie put down, Negan asks if they “also knew Blackbeard.” Pirate reference. This walker is also missing an eye, which is Sirius symbolism.

Then we see Negan teaching Maggie how to move like the Whisperers do among the walker wards. At one point, Maggie says, "This is not fun." Very close to Beth's line which was, "killing them is not supposed to be fun."

Maggie sends Gabriel to scout out Meridian. We don't know at this point what he's looking for. This is the somewhat strange part where he hides from the priest and is almost discovered. But when he returns, he tells Maggie, “It’s still there." Because Maggie's group used to live in Meridian, clearly she's looking for something that they can use to help them and hoping the Reapers haven't moved or destroyed it. They don't tell us what it is in this episode, but I'm sure we'll find out.

During Negan and Maggie's heart to heart, I really liked that he called her Rhee. I'm not gonna say Negan was being respectful, because he doesn't really know the meaning of the word. But it was nice to hear him call her by Glenn's last name. At one point, he also says, "I get it." Beth line. He also mentions Aaron and Gracie, and that he knows Gracie came from the Savior compound, which was very interesting.

Of course, the episode ends, where Maggie's group is concerned, with them leading the walker herd toward Meridian. And of course, Elijah sees his sister and we have the very poignant scene where Elijah cries and Maggie holds his hand.

Daryl and Leah:

When Pope was yelling at his people to look for Maggie's group, he tells them to look by the lake, train tracks, and freeway overpasses. All those are places that have been linked to Beth symbolism in the past. Water, train tracks. The freeway overpasses one jumped out at me because there was a line that Edward said at Grady about how the first guy who died when Beth was there had been found under a freeway overpass with the box of Bisquick and a Merle Haggard tape.

I've seen a lot of people talk about a line that Daryl used when talking with Leah. She was telling him how Pope believed in her when no one else would. And it made her strong. Daryl remarked, "I doubt you've ever needed anyone to make you strong." Just a great call back to Beth and her, "I am strong," line.

When Daryl and Leah are out and just before they find the random family, there are some mushrooms on a log. Daryl sees it as evidence that someone has walked through there recently because it looked like they either trampled on or try to gather the mushrooms. So, yet another mushroom reference. I actually have more to say about the mushroom theme because of something that was mentioned on The World Beyond (TWB).

(By the way, I am going to do posts on the first episodes of TWB, but I want to focus on regular TWD until after episode eight airs next week. Then I’ll do some analysis of the first three TWB episodes together.)

I don't have a ton more to add about the final sequence with Leah and Daryl, when she can't kill the mother, so Daryl does it for her and then covers the woman with the white sheet. It's a major call back to Beth and it was a big deal.

The only other detail I noticed in the scene is that there were some pink flowers hanging, as if to dry, by Daryl's head. Pink theory.

The Commonwealth:

Of course, we have Eugene's group (all except Yumiko) clearing walkers in the Commonwealth. Eugene and Stephonie have a conversation in which he talks about the cerebellum and how it can block out unpleasant memories. Just felt like the brain injury sort of conversation to me.

Of course, Zeke is not doing well again. Princess has a line where she says, "they got real hospitals and shit here." Naturally, the word hospital gets our attention. I know there are still a lot of people who think Beth is at the Commonwealth and might be in one of the hospitals. I'm not totally convinced of that, but I would be down with it if it ends up being the case. We simply don't know yet.

 Yumiko has an interview and insists on seeing Pamela Milton immediately. Because of the incident with Eugene, she doesn’t actually see Pamela in this episode.

She and Tommy speak again. Tommy reiterates strongly that, "no one can know I was a doctor." Yumiko appears to be surprised by that for the first time. And then only moments later, the CW guards come and take him away. I'm not sure how they found out, but we have all wondered if she didn't say something to someone already during the interview and screen process. We know that she said she wanted to find her brother, so it only makes sense that she let slip that he was a doctor at some point.

We haven’t been given a lot of details about what they know, but it seems obvious that something about her arrival has led to him being taken away. Later, Hornsby says he'll get Tommy out for her, but obviously there's a lot more going on here, and I doubt it will be that simple.

Ezekiel is given medical care, which once again we didn't see. It's all happening offscreen (another reason why people are suspicious about the CW's hospital. Why aren't we seeing that, or the people in it? Plus, remember that in the CW sales video, we saw a nurse in blue scrubs with blonde hair who looked a whole lot like Beth.)

When Zeke returns, he brings pink lollipops for everyone. Very much like Beth O'Grady except hers were green. But, of course, Pink Theory.

And of course, we have the whole incident with Pamela Milton’s son and how they set Eugene up to try to force him to give away Alexandria's location.

We also had the part where Yumiko is waiting in the reception area, waiting to talk to Pamela Milton. The real Stephanie is the receptionist. She seems worried about Eugene and the group, but Yumiko has no reason to suspect her of anything.

We also noticed Yumiko looking through a coffee table book that seems to have Italian villas in it. Not sure what that points to, but they focused on for too long for it not to mean something.

I think that's pre-much it for details in this episode. Anything I missed?

[chandelier-s-notebook]

Chapter 3

Let me know if you wanna get tagged when I post new chapters in “These Streets Are Made For Walking”. @sleepysnails.

Ao3 Link

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“Police! Everybody put your hands up!” they shouted barging into the main hall of the abandoned mall.

Heads turned and there was a brief moment of disconnect; on one side you had the fighters wondering who snitched, and on the other you had officers equipped for a potential multi-party drug deal and instead got a fighting ring operating in broad daylight.

People scattered, some ran to the exits; some hid in the rubble of the crumbling building; some were still with shock; and others were close enough to get grabbed by an officer. Out of those, a few guys fought them off, but others--such as the Dream Team--went quietly.

The Dream Team and two others were led out of the building.

“Where are you taking us?” the younger girl walking along with them asked, worry etched on her face.

“We’re just taking you to the parking lot,” the officer said. “Then you’ll be taken to the station to make a statement.”

“First time?” Dream asked, trying to make a joke.

Sapnap whacked him upside the head. “Not funny.”

“I’ve never been caught before,” the girl murmured to him, her tone significantly hardened. She quickly lightened up her voice and addressed the officer, “Will we be charged?”

“Mostly likely.”

The officer led them out to the parking lot.

Captain Craft met them at the barrier. “I’ll take them from here X33N. Jordan's just arrived to take over the scene, I’m going back to the station to get these guys processed.”

“Yes Sir.”

“We’ll send out rotating cruisers to pull in detainees as your team apprehends them.”

“Understood Sir.” The officer--X33N--left the five of them with Officer Craft.

Captain Craft’s junior partner then abruptly grabbed Dream by the shoulders and shoved him down to the car.

“Ouch!”

“You are under arrest for loitering on private property.”

“Geez, I get it! No need to be so rough. I came quietly, for goodness sake.”

“Just had to make sure you didn’t get away,” they said snidely.

“The only place I’m going, is the fucking station.” Dream let the officer pull him upright. “I’d like Captain Craft’s car if I get the choice.”

Captain Craft gave his junior partner a nod as well as a hard look. “Be gentle. Treat them with respect, otherwise things will just get worse. You respond, not instigate,” he reprimanded. Captain Craft was much gentler with Sapnap, George, the girl, and the other boy.

Dream and George rode with Captain Craft, while the other three took another car driven by the junior partner.

“Fuck,” George whispered under his breath.

“What is it?”

“Seriously?”

“Specifically,” Dream amended.

“Mother is gonna kill me.” George dropped his head forwards. “She’s been on my ass for that 92 I got in biology last week.”

“She’s still on about that?” Dream asked. “Dude it was a 92, people would kill for a 92.”

“Word choice,” Captain Craft teased from the front seat.

“Sorry,” Dream quickly said, attention never fully leaving George. “She’s too hard on you.”

“And now I’m being taken into the station.”

“George, you’re the medic. You didn’t do anything.”

“Willful ignorance,” George cried pitifully.

“Dude shut up. Anything can and will be used against you and all that.”

“Fuck. Right. Sorry.” George took a deep breath. “It would come out in questioning anyways. Fuck. Mother’s gonna read this on the news.”

“You didn’t have to come with us.”

“I need to live Dream.”

Captain Craft parked the car. He opened the door and ushered the two of them inside, the other three following close behind.

“Names?” the receptionist asked.

“Dream Taken, you?”

“F1NN,” he replied offhandedly, typing Dream’s name into the system. “No current warrants. Next.”

“George Lore.”

“Sapnap Halo”

“Hannah Rose.”

“Walli Bear.”

“Any injuries?”

All five of them stood patiently as F1NN led them through the spiel, the Dream Team bored, Hannah putting on her scared little girl front, and Walli looking genuinely panicked and muted. Dream was then taken away for solo questioning by Captain Craft first, and the rest were taken into a communal holding cell in the station.

“Dream Taken, was it?”

“Yes Sir.” Too formal.

“How are you this fine afternoon?”

“Wonderful. Going to me on my best behaviour for the few weeks I believe. I’ll try too anyway,” he bantered.

“Dream.”

“What’s on your mind Captain?” Dream leaned forward on his elbows. “Any questions for me?”

“There was this kid--your age--in the parking lot.”

Dream blinked, his joking persona dropping for a split second. “Yeah? What about it?”

“He was doing homework. Said that was his spot to get out of the house. What’s the likelihood he didn’t know what was going on?”

Dream wasn’t about to throw Techno under the bus. “Pretty high. He could have gotten there before us and not noticed everyone parking around him today. Also could be a case of thinking that this was normal and not questioning things. You know, Las Nevadas guys running around, best to keep your head low.”

“Advice you clearly stand by.”

Dream shot the officer a wide smile. “That’s my aim.”

Captain Craft scribbled something down in his notebook. “How often does that ring meet?”

“Every so often. It moves around.”

“How many locations?”

“Three? Four? Not sure.”

“Fight often?”

“When I’m told the location.”

“Where’s the next one?”

Dream wiggled his eyebrows. “Not telling.”

“Less community service hours coming your way if you ‘fess up.”

“Need that in print before I hand everyone over. Besides, I only attend when it’s at the mall.”  Dream smiled again, clearly having fun with the banter. “Am I done here? I think I’m done.”

“Nothing more to say?”

“I didn’t fight this afternoon. I only watched.”

Captain Crafted jotted it down, he flipped the page and wrote down another note before ripping it off and closing the book. “Take this to F1NN and call your guardian for pick up. Loitering on public property, and willful ignorance to assault and battery.”

Dream stood up and pushed his chair in. “Not gonna walk me there?”

“We’ve been here enough times,” Captain Craft sighed. “Best behaviour?”

“Of course.”

Captain Craft cut open Dream’s zip ties and sent him on his way.

Dream gave the note to F1NN and was given the phone in return; like clockwork these visits were. That was a bad thing wasn’t it?

After two rings Bad picked up his phone. “Hello?”

“Hi Bad, it’s Dream.”

“Tubbo just left,” he said as if he knew exactly what Dream would have wanted from him. “Techno just came by to pick him up.”

“That’s ‘cause I told him to,” Dream explained. “The three of us got picked up by the police, think you could bring us home?”

Bad could be heard moving around the apartment, and he heard the clinking of keys. “I’m on my way. Anything I need to know?”

“George and Sapnap will probably be calling you, once they’re finished with their interviews.”

Half an hour later Sapnap was sitting shotgun in his dad’s car, while Dream and George chilled in the backseat of the car. The first stop of the night was Punz’s house, so they could pick Tubbo up, before dropping Dream off at home.

Bad parked on the driveway, and Dream got out of the car. He walked up to the front and used his spare key to get in.

It’s quiet, and too early for the fourteen year olds to be asleep. Tubbo and Purpled are good friends, they had been since childhood; getting dropped off at Bad-Halo’s-Unofficial-Daycare-for-the-Siblings-of-Petty-Criminals-and-Their-(Count-‘Em)-One-Normal-Friend did that to friendships. They should have been playing around here somewhere.

Dream stalked around the house looking for clues as to where they might have gone. It was in the kitchen that he found a note.

“Purpled went out. Didn’t want to be here alone. Went to Ranboo’s.”

Dream grabbed the note and groaned in frustration, all this way for nothing? He checked his phone. Nope, Tubbo hadn’t even sent a text message. He left the house--making sure to lock the door behind him--in a huff.

Opening the car door, he slid in, exhaling loudly. “Punz wasn’t home. Purpled’s gone. Note saying Tubbo went to Ranboo’s. I’ll just bus home from your place. Think Techno left my bag with you.”

“He did. I noticed it on my way out.” Bad pulled out of Punz’s driveway. “Why don’t you stay the night?”

“I would, but you know Ranboo’s parents. If they find Tubbo there, they’ll kick him out, and I’d rather be in the apartment if he has to come back.”

Bad nodded. “I’ll drive you and George back to your places then.”

“Actually, Bad?” George interjected quietly. “Can I crash at your place? Mom’s been a lot this week already and they got our picture. Think we’re gonna be in the news again.”

Bad sighed. “You’re ruining your future. How will you get into university with those articles?”

“Good grades and scholarships,” Sapnap said.

Bad laughed. “Of course you can stay the night.”

[everydaymj]

Number One Fan - Peter Parker x Stark!Reader

Summary: AU where Peter doesn’t know Tony and is working for the Daily Bugle and is the photographer for Y/N Stark’s interview. To say you hit it off is an understatement. 

Being a freelance photographer I took all kinds of pictures for the paper, most of them ended up being of Spider-man but occasionally I was brought along with a reporter for specific pictures JJ wanted.

Today was one of those times, I was just about to leave after dropping off my latest folder of Spider-man shots when I heard someone yelling at me. Or about me, more like.

"Just take Parker, he's not totally useless. I want some good shots, this is the first interview she's agreed to do in almost a year and she picked us. I want details, something nobody else has! Now get the hell out of my office!"

A very worn down looking Anderson, lead reporter for the celebrity news section at The Bugle, walked out of JJ's office with a sigh. Scanning the room, he smiled when he locked eyes with me.

"Parker, you're with me. Come on."

His tone left no room for argument so I followed him to the elevator.

Once the doors had closed he turned to me with an appraising look.

"I've seen your work, you're pretty good kid. Too bad Jameson hates Spider-man so much, the shots you get of him are almost unbelievable. Could make for a great story of New York's underdog hero."

I grinned. He would never believe me if I told him how I got them, so I guess they were a bit unbelievable. And he didn't seem to blindly bend to JJ's opinion that I was, erm Spider-man was a menace to society.

"Thanks. I like to believe that someday he'll come around and see that Spider-man isn't all that bad. So what am I supposed to get pictures of? I could hear him yelling about an interview with someone but that's about it."

Anderson snorted.

"Kid, I think the entire building could hear him. But yeah, apparently he somehow landed a one on one with probably the most private celebrity in New York."

I raised my brows, wow that's pretty big.

"Who is it?"

He smirked as the elevator doors dinged and we stepped out into the lobby.

"Y/N Stark. She's a recluse compared to her brother, so the fact that she agreed to do an interview is almost unheard of. Every paper in the city has been asking since she got back from helping in Sokovia with the relief effort and that was four months ago."

Everyone in the city knew who she was, New York's darling as the celebrity fluff pieces liked to call her. There was always some kind of story about her in the magazines and tabloids, her volunteer efforts, the latest party she'd been spotted at, and of course speculation on who she was or wasn't dating.

I can't imagine growing up in the spotlight like she did, it would have drove me crazy.

I looked up as Anderson whistled sharply, hailing a cab.

"Look alive Parker, time to go."

Shaking my head, I jumped in the cab with him as he told the cabby to take us to Avengers Tower and step on it.

"So it's a big deal then?"

He rolled his eyes and smiled.

"In the grand scheme of things? No. But in the world of celebrity obsessed who are dying to get even a sound bite from this girl, yeah it is. You ever done something like this before?"

I grabbed the door as the cab took a very sharp turn and the cabby started yelling at the car who just cut us off.

"No, but how hard can it be? Just a few shots and we're done right?"

He laughed.

"Cute, you obviously never had to deal with bratty socialites and stuck-up divas. Lucky for you she's supposed to be the exact opposite of her brother. But yeah shouldn't be that difficult, a few shots of her smiling or something and we're golden."

Didn't sound too hard, should be a piece of cake.

I smiled at him as the cab screeched to a halt in front of the large imposing building that was Avengers Tower.

"Sounds easy enough, let's do this!"

Grinning at me, Anderson slapped me on the back.

"Your optimism is nauseating Parker, but it might just get you places."

I just followed him inside as he made a beeline for the receptionist at the large desk in the lobby. She didn't even look up at us but pointed to the elevator on the other side of the room.

Muttering under his breath about rude women, we got on the elevator.

"You must be from the paper; Miss Y/N is expecting you. I will direct you to the meeting room."

I jumped at the sudden voice coming from nowhere.

Anderson just chuckled.

"Stark's AI, practically runs the place. It's weird at first but you get used to it. Freaked me out when I came here to interview Pepper Potts a few years ago."

Okay, that actually really awesome. Nodding I started fiddling with my camera, making sure I'd be ready, while Anderson went over his notes and list of questions.

The elevator slowed to a stop and the disembodied British voice broke the silence.

"Miss Y/N wishes me to inform you she's running a bit behind and will be meeting with you on her floor instead of the conference room. If you'll wait just one moment."

We stepped out and the first thing I noticed was the huge wall of glass that led out to a balcony loaded with plants. Before either of us could say anything, a hurried female voice could be heard.

"JARVIS are they here yet? Tell them I'm sorry, got caught up with Tony and I completely forgot."

A short Y/H/C blur whipped around the corner.

"Miss Y/N, I implore you loo-"

Before I could move out of the way she slammed into me, knocking both of us to the ground.

The AI sighed exasperatedly, was that even possible?

"Look out…A useless endeavor I suppose. The men from the paper are here, as you can see. I'll leave you to it, let me know if the boy you just trampled is in need of medical assistance."

I could hear Anderson laughing and started to get up but a weight on top of me kept me from doing so.

Blinking I looked up at her and met Y/E/C eyes that seemed to sparkle.

Oh wow…

She was sprawled on top of me with a dazed expression, her hands spread out on my chest as she slowly realized what had happened. Very quickly she scrambled off of me, as a horrified look spread across her face.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!"

Taking the hand Anderson offered I stood up and checked to make sure my camera was okay. Seeing that it was I looked back at her and nodded, hiding a smile at how worried she looked. It was kinda cute, she was really cute actually.

"Yeah, I'm fine. No worries."

She frowned and took a step closer.

"Are you sure? I can't believe I did that, really I am so sorry."

As I was about to tell her one more time that I was fine, Anderson cleared his throat catching her attention.

"Trey Anderson, The Daily Bugle. Now that you and my photographer have been acquainted, how about we get started?"

He eyes widened and a slight flush appeared on her cheeks.

"Oh right, of course. You don't mind if we go out on the balcony do you? It's such a nice day after all."

She motioned to the large glass wall that had first caught my eye and started towards it, the sliding door opening as she did. Anderson and I followed her outside and he sat down on the nice outdoor couch, while I strayed closer to the edge of the large balcony so I wouldn't bother him. And that way I could get some pictures without interrupting them.

"Once again I'm really sor-"

Cutting her off from apologizing once again, Anderson started his recorder.

"So why now? Why agree to an interview now when the press has been begging for one for months?"

Somewhat taken aback at his abruptness she raised her brows in surprise.

"Well, I…I'm not as outgoing as my brother but I'm not a hermit. I've been incredibly busy since I got back from Sokovia helping organize benefits and put together the rebuild relief and then time just kind of got away from me. Tony kept telling me I'd have to talk to the press sooner or later, I guess it just ended up being later."

Anderson nodded.

"Understandable Miss Stark, now I'd like t-"

She smirked and stopped him.

"Call me Y/N."

He grinned.

Okay then, Y/N, tell me about your time in Sokovia."

Her eyes lit up and without any more prompting she started talking about the people of Sokovia, waving her arms and motioning with her hands. I snapped several pictures of the animated look on her face, half of them ended up blurry due to her moving around so much but the other half weren't bad.

As they talking about Sokovia and her other volunteer and charity work, I kinda zoned out and just looked at her.

She was a lot shorter than both of us, had to be just over 5 feet tall. Her wild Y/H/C hair was down, a lose strand peeking out from behind her ear as she constantly pushed it back out of her face. Very minimal makeup, a dusting of freckles on her nose and cheeks.

I smiled looking at how she was dressed, jeans and a plain green shirt. So much for stuck-up diva, she seemed so down to earth.

She was a knockout.

I kinda wished I'd at least been able to introduce myself but Anderson was quick to get down to business.

It was only later after all the bases had been covered, that I tuned back in when Anderson brought up something that made me perk up.

"So, because the entire city wants to know, are you currently dating anyone?

I don't know why I was so interested in her answer, but I looked up to see what she'd say.

She rolled her eyes.

"Why is that always what people want to know? Who are you wearing? Are you dating anyone? It's ridiculous!"

Anderson grinned.

"What can I say? The people want what the people want. So any juicy details you wanna divulge?"

She shrugged and I snapped a picture right as she smiled.

"Sorry to tell you, I'm single. And kinda boring, so there really isn't much to tell. I stay in and binge watch Netflix and eat pizza just like everybody else."

He looked at her skeptically.

"Okay but what about the guy you've been spotted with in Hell's Kitchen? Some tabloid got a fuzzy picture of you two arm in arm coming out of a diner. What about that?"

She frowned for a second and then laughed.

"That? Oh that was my friend Matt, we meet for lunch every once in a while. I met him when I was visiting a friend of mine from med school a couple years ago."

"I dunno Y/N, you two looked pretty cosy."

Narrowing her eyes, she looked over his shoulder at me and smirked.

"Did I forget to mention? Matt is blind. I was helping him get back to his office, he's one of the founding partners in a law firm just a few blocks from the diner we were at."

I held back a laugh as she seemed to be enjoying the uncomfortable look on his face. She grinned at me and I snapped another picture as she winked at me.

Anderson looked a bit embarrassed at his blunder and quickly moved on.

"So no boyfriend, got it. The boys of New York will be happy to know you're still on the market."

She just groaned and shook her head.

He clicked off his recorder and stood up with a smile.

"I think that's about it. If you'll just let Parker here, get a few more pictures of you then we'll be out of your hair."

She snapped around to look at me, recognition in her eyes as she stood up.

"No problem! This wasn't nearly as bad as Tony always makes it out to be."

He laughed and shook her hand.

"Okay off the record, I gotta know. Why did you pick the Bugle out of all the papers asking to interview you?"

She looked down as a slight flush came over her face.

"You really wanna know?"

He nodded, curiosity in his eyes.

"Yeah, not that I'm complaining but the Times and the Sun were just as eager to have this interview. Why us?"

She bit her lip and glanced at the city below us with a small smile.

"Well, the Bugle always has the best pictures of Spider-man and I kinda have a little crush on him so…"

Wait, what?

I froze as her gaze turned to me, a huge smile on her face.

She had a crush on me?!

Well Spider-man, but still!

Ignoring the amused smile Anderson was sporting she walked over to me.

"You're the one who takes them all? Peter Parker right? I see your name in the Bugle all the time. I'm a big fan, the shots are amazing, and the angles you get are incredible!"

I found myself at a loss for words, she really didn't have much of a sense of personal space because she was about a foot from me and anything I would have said flew out the window with her big Y/E/C eyes staring up at me like that.

She really was pretty, I wonder if…nah no way I stood a chance with a girl like her.

Finally finding something to say I stuttered out an answer.

"I…uh, y-yeah that's me."

She leaned ever closer, excitement on her face.

"Have you met him? Like talked to him?"

I couldn't concentrate because she was way too close to me to think straight.

Before I could try and answer her, Anderson cut in.

"Wait, you live with superheroes why the fixation on the web slinger?"

She tilted her head in thought as she moved away from me.

"Well I guess when you live with someone they don't seem as fantastic when you see them every day, not to say my family isn't awesome. But really, once you see Thor with bedhead you can't un-see it."

Chuckling at the thought, Anderson spoke up again.

"So you like Spider-man because he's mysterious and different?"

She shook her head and furrowed her brow.

"No it's not that. Of course that is cool but I like how he sticks up for the little guy, the Avengers save the world one catastrophe at a time but Spiderman is out there stopping crime every day. I just admire that and think he shouldn't get as much crap from the media as he does.

She grinned again, looking smug.

"And you can quote me on that."

I just looked at her in shock, did she really just say that?

I finally found my voice as we all walked inside, Anderson already heading for the elevator while Y/N waited for me.

Smiling at her I messed with the strap on my camera.

"Not many people would say that about Spider-man, I'm sure he'd appreciate knowing you felt that way."

She blushed and looked away.

"I bet not, I'm just one girl out of an entire city."

I felt the corner of my lips turn up in a grin.

"Nah, I think you're wrong, everyone likes knowing they're appreciated."

She looked up at me and smiled.

"Maybe you're right. Gosh knows Tony likes it, he adores the high he gets from being Iron Man."

I laughed and ignored Anderson's look when she put her hand on my arm.

"Yeah, what's that like? Having Iron Man for a brother I mean."

She rolled her eyes and sighed.

"It's never boring that's for sure. I've been kidnapped a few times, that's always fun. Um, let's see, Tony likes to go flying and scare the crap out of me by bringing me with him. Oh and we both make it a game to try and steal Cap's shield when he's not looking. Always something with him, usually something loud and explosive but it keeps things interesting."

Surprised at the info dump, I picked up on one thing that didn't seem to fit her vibrant personality.

"You're scared of heights?"

She playfully shoved my arm and laughed.

"No, I just don't like flying with Tony. It's too loud and he likes freak me out by almost crashing into stuff. I'd love it if it weren't for that, heck I went wing suiting in Rio for my birthday last year. I'm a bit of an adrenaline junkie."

Y/N Stark was just full of surprises.

Getting an idea, I innocently looked down at her.

"So swinging around like Spider-man would be more your style?"

Her eyes sparkled and she grinned.

"Absolutely! He makes it look so easy and smooth, gliding around like that, swinging around the city would be a dream come true! Much better than how my brother buzzes around in a tin can."

My eyes widened in surprise and I bit back a laugh.

She gasped and looked up at the ceiling.

"JARVIS don't you dare tell Tony I said that! He'd flip out!"

That same British voice with a very amused tone answered her.

"If he asks, my programming prevents me from hiding it from him. But until then your secret is safe with me Miss Y/N."

She sighed and shook her head.

"Well let's just hope he doesn't ask. Wouldn't do for him to find out he's not my favorite hero right?"

It was nice to have someone say I was their favorite. Especially someone as cute and funny as Y/N.

I grinned and rubbed the back of my neck.

"Yeah, can't have Iron Man being jealous of Spider-man."

Her eyes seemed to glint with mischief and she put a finger to her lips.

"Our little secret then, I'll trust you not to rat me out to Tony."

Just as I opened my mouth to reply both of us jumped at the barking voice of Anderson.

"Parker! Time to go, we've taken up enough of the lady's time. JJ's gonna want this as soon as possible."

I looked over at him and felt a flush on my face as he nodded at Y/N and smirked at me.

Oh great, I'm sure I'd be hearing it from him on the way back.

Turning back to Y/N, I saw her smile fall as she looked down.

"Oh, right. I'm sure you both have more important things to be doing. I'll let you guys get going."

I frowned at Anderson, of course he would ruin the moment.

Looking back at Y/N, I sighed.

"I guess he's right, we should go."

I really didn't want to go, here was a beautiful girl that was actually giving me the time of day and I had to leave. And unless she agreed to do another interview with the Bugle then we most likely wouldn't cross paths again.

Life just wasn't fair.

The elevator dinged cheerily and I wanted to glare at it for getting here so fast. Anderson stepped inside and as I moved to follow him I stopped short as Y/N's hand shot out and grabbed my arm.

"Peter wait! I mean, uh…I was wondering if maybe you'd want to hang out again? I'd love to see your pictures sometime and um…oh I could show you around the tower! The view from the penthouse is amazing! I mean if you wanted, like we could just go for coffee or something too."

It was like she was trying to convince me when I totally didn't need convincing to want to hang out with her. I felt a stupid smile cross my face as she continued to argue her case.

It was adorable.

Then as if just realizing her hand was still on my arm, her eyes widened and she trailed off with a flush on her face.

I smiled, trying my best to not be an awkward dork as I answered her.

"Yeah! Uh I mean sure, we could totally hang out sometime."

And there was the awkwardness, way to be cool Parker.

She beamed at me and all but shoved her phone in my hand that she had whipped out of her back pocket.

"Really?! Awesome, just give me your number and we can go from there."

Almost dropping it as I handed her my phone, I typed in my number saving it with a camera emoji next to my name. That wasn't lame was it? Oh well, too late to take it back now I'd already handed her phone back to her.

Before I could check and see what she'd saved her number as, Anderson grabbed the back of my collar yanking me into the elevator.

"Thanks for your time Y/N."

I glared at Anderson and looked back at Y/N as the doors started to close.

"See you around Peter, bye Trey."

I waved at her, smiling as she laughed. Then the doors were closed and I could feel Anderson staring at me, so I looked at him just waiting for it.

He only grinned and slapped my back.

"When you 'totally hang out' be sure to tell me how it goes okay?"

I just rolled my eyes and shoved his hand off as I started looking for her number in my contacts.

I grinned as I saw her name, this was turning out to be a really great day.

                                                         ~~~

Stepping outside to water my plants, I looked out at the skyline of New York City and sighed.

"JARVIS?"

"Yes Miss Y/N?"

Letting my little rose bush have a drink I frowned.

"On a scale of one to Tony when he's drunk how stupid did I sound today?"

"I'm assuming you mean when Mister Parker was here correct?"

I could feel the amusement in JARVIS's tone and I rolled my eyes. Leave it to my brother to create a sassy AI.

"Yeah that's what I meant."

Walking to where I'd put my night lilies, I stood next to the rail of the balcony as I poured water over the soil.

"You came off more endearing than anything, nothing to worry about I'm sure. If I may ask, why are you so bothered about this?"

I set the watering can down.

"I don't know, something about Peter…he was different. He seemed real, not faking it because of what my last name is or who my brother is. I guess I just really liked him that's all."

"Well, if his flushed face elevated heart rate was anything to go by I think he likes you too."

Smiling at the thought, I felt a blush come over my face as I leaned on the rail looking out over the city.

"And oh my god he was so cute, like what a babe! That whole sexy nerd thing really works for him."

I heard JARVIS sigh.

"This sounds like a conversation Miss Potts would be better suited for, shall I get her instead?"

Laughing I shook my head.

"No, just let me ramble."

"Very well Miss."

Sighing dreamily at the thought of the adorable photographer, I wondered if I should wait for him to text me first.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Not looking up I bit my lip and smiled.

"Oh I was just thinking about a very cute photographer and hoping he'd call me."

Wait a second…there wasn't anyone out here but me and that wasn't JARVIS.

Looking up I scrambled backwards at the sight before me.

Spider-man was lazily sitting on the side of the building, looking at me.

I'm sure I looked ridiculous, standing there with my mouth hanging open just staring at him.

"I um…you're Spider-man!"

He chuckled and hopped of the glass window and onto the balcony with me.

"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you. But I was swinging by and heard you talking to yourself and wanted to check it out."

I could feel my face turning bright red.

"I wasn't talking to myself! H-how long were you there?"

He shrugged and I got the sense he was smirking at me.

"Not long. I didn't know nerds could be sexy though, guess you learn something new every day."

Oh god this is so embarrassing! But I wouldn't let him get the best of me, hero crush or not I wasn't just gonna stand here like a star struck dork.

Channeling Tony I beat down the blush on my face and grinned at him.

"I guess I have a type, what can I say?"

He took a few steps closer, as if testing to see if I would back away. I didn't move, watching him as he moved closer.

"Everyone does, like I've always had a thing for Y/H/C."

My eyes widened.

Was he flirting with me? No, he couldn't be I had to be reading into things.

Shaking off the idea that Spider-man could be flirting with me I smiled.

"Okay so I met your personal photographer today, and I have to say he really knows how to catch your good side."

While I couldn't see his face, I got the distinct feeling he was grinning.

"Did you now? He wouldn't be the aforementioned photographer now would he? Cause if he then he's one lucky guy."

Looking out at the city so he wouldn't see the blush that was threatening to take over, I ran a hand through my windblown hair.

"Well I don't know about that, but I think there's something there."

Watching him in my peripheral vision, I tensed as he got a little closer.

"What makes you say that?"

He sounded curious, like he genuinely wanted to know so I answered him.

"I don't know really, I'm probably over thinking things and I literally just met him today but I feel like we were supposed to meet each other."

Shaking my head, I looked back at Spider-man and smiled.

"You're pretty nosy for a superhero you know that?"

He laughed.

"Don't you know us hero types live on gossip?"

Snorting, I grinned.

"Makes sense, my brother is the worst. Always wanting to know everyone's business and be a part of it."

Surly he knew who I was, I mean it's not like my face wasn't all over the tabloids with stories about Iron Man's little sister. It was highly unlikely Spider-man didn't know who I was.

Pausing, I smiled thinking of how caring my brother really was.

"Not in a bad way though, Tony just wants to help most of the time, make sure everyone is okay. He's actually a lot softer than his Iron Man persona would lead you to believe."

There was a beat of silence before he responded.

"Yeah, the few times we've crossed paths he did come off as a bit of a busybody to be honest but I'll take your word for it."

I snorted, Tony definitely had some busybody qualities to be sure. Before I could say anything, he spoke up.

"So how some come you aren't out there flying around in a suit of your own? You strike me as the type of girl to want to be out there with him."

I turned to look at him and wished I could see his face

"Well Tony would never in a million years give me the tools to go out and do crazy dangerous stuff like he and the team do. But you're right, I would be out there with him if I could. So I do what I can, the Sokovia relief organization has been my main focus lately."

I grinned at him, remembering my conversation with Peter earlier today.

"And it's not like I never get to fly around, Tony takes me with him sometimes. Not that I particularly enjoy it, what with his suit not being the most comfortable ride, but the flying thing is pretty cool."

I started as he hopped up on the balcony rail, somehow balancing perfectly as he stretched his hand out to me.

"Well I can't fly per say but I bet I can show you a view of the city you've never seen before. Whadaya say, wanna see New York like I do?"

I looked at his offered hand in shock.

Here was Spider-man, my hero crush offering to take me swinging around the city. Was this not exactly what I'd been talking to Peter about earlier?

This was crazy!

But there was no way I was gonna turn him down, so I slowly took his hand with a raised brow.

"Bring it on web head."

Laughing he pulled me up on the rail with him making me cling to him so I didn't fall. Not that I thought he would let me fall, but oh god this was high!

He raised the hand not securely wrapped around me and shot a web at the next building over as I put my arms around him.

"Hold on."

Just as I was about to give him a sassy retort he jumped off the rail and we were free-falling.

Squealing in excitement, I gasped as the web went taunt and we swung upwards.

It was so exhilarating! The wind whipping through my hair and the city blurring around us was absolutely amazing.

Effortlessly he switched arms, now holding me with the other and had shot another web yanking us in a different direction.

"Okay check this out."

Before I could ask him what he meant, he'd swung over to where we were parallel to one of the glass buildings a block over from the tower.

"You ready?"

I furrowed my brow even though he wasn't looking at me as I felt his arm tighten around me.

"For what?"

He just laughed and suddenly we were running on the side of the building. I looked down at out reflections in the mirrored windows and couldn't believe this was really happening.

Letting out a whoop of pure glee, I stretched my hand out feeling the wind rush through my fingers. This definitely beat anything I'd ever done before, what a rush!

And then before I could catch my breath we were back in the air, gliding through the city.

I got the idea he was showing off a bit and I didn't mind one bit because this was beyond amazing.

It was only later when he landed us on top of one the taller buildings in the city, that I realized we had circled back around and were pretty close to the tower, I could see my balcony from here.

Looking out at the city I couldn't help but be blown away at the view, it was just starting to get dusky out and the sunset was fantastic.

"So what'd you think? Cool right?"

Spinning around to look at Spider-man who was a yard or so away from me, I threw my hands up in the air motioning to the view around us.

"Are you kidding me?! This is way beyond cool! I can't believe you get to do this whenever you want, like I'm so jealous!"

He snickered and rubbed the back of his neck, something about it reminded me of someone but I couldn't place who.

"It's not a bad gig that's for sure, bad press aside I wouldn't trade it."

I wrinkled my nose and tucked my hair behind my ear.

"I don't get that, like all you do is help people, the fact that you get such crap from the press is unbelievable! All of them are idiots, don't listen to word they say. I think you're amazing."

Realizing I just said that out loud, I felt a blush starting to appear on my face and I once again wished I could see his face. If only to see what his expression was.

"Haters gonna hate right? But really, thanks. I know not everyone believes what they say about me but it's nice to hear. And it never hurts when a pretty girl says they think you're amazing."

I blinked owlishly, was he flirting with me again? Deciding not to think about that I focused on something else.

Grinning at him, I raised a brow.

"Did you just quote Taylor Swift?"

He held up a hand and I could imagine him to be smiling under that mask of his.

"Hey don't be hating on my girl T Swift!"

I giggled and shook my head.

"Oh never, I love her! But you didn't strike me as a Swiftie."

He snorted and tilted his head.

"I'm a surprising guy, and I have to shake off most of what's said about me so… Besides, I'll have you know that under the mask I'm rocking some hella good hair myself."

I doubled over laughing, while he crossed his arms, rolling his eyes most likely.

"Oh my god, you are such a dork!"

Looking up I tried to compose myself but the thought of Spider-man swinging through the city rocking out to Shake it Off was too much and I couldn't stop laughing.

"You know I could just leave you here."

Wiping my face to get rid of the tears that had leaked out when I was laughing, I smirked at him.

"But you won't, for one my brother would probably start a city wide spider hunt for leaving his baby sister on the top of a building, and two, you like me too much to just leave me here."

Hey who says I wasn't allowed to flirt back?

He sighed and started walking towards me.

"I guess you're right, having Iron Man out for me isn't on my list of thing I really need to happen. You being really cute doesn't have a thing to do with it."

I was about to reply when he darted forward and grabbed me by the waist and jumped off the roof, completely taking me off guard.

I shrieked in surprise, latching onto him as he chuckled, swinging us over to my balcony.

As we landed he very gently let me down and perched on the rail about at eye level with me.

I glared playfully at him.

"Jerk."

He just shrugged and if I had to guess, I'm pretty sure he was grinning.

"You know you love me."

I snorted and smiled at him.

"Just call me your number one fan."

He leaned forward and was suddenly very close to my face.

"I wouldn't mind that."

I flushed at how close he was but I didn't back away.

While I still had a bit of a crush on the masked hero in front of me, thoughts of a fluffy haired brown eyed photographer lingered in the back of my mind. Maybe my thing for the web slinger was more of an infatuation because I found myself wishing it was someone else's face I was this close to.

Smiling, I tapped him on the forehead pushing him back in just the slightest.

"Hmm, well it's too bad you aren't my type. You sure know how to impress a girl though, this was amazing!"

He seemed like he was holding back a laugh.

"Right, that nerd of yours has no idea how lucky he is. Looks like I'll have to settle for number one fan."

I smiled softly.

"I don't know about that. But I'll always be the president of your fan club, guess I'll just have to get in more trouble so this isn't a one-time thing."

He shook his head.

"That won't be necessary, I think I can make an exception for you. See you around!"

With that he stood up and back flipped off of the balcony rail and started swinging off to who knows where.

As soon as he was out of my line of sight I felt my phone start to vibrate in my back pocket, pulling it out I felt a sappy smile on my face.

It was Peter.

While I had the time of my life swinging through the city with Spider-man and would do it again in heartbeat, Peter Parker was the one I couldn't stop thinking about.

Grinning I answered my phone.

"Hey Peter, you're never gonna believe what just happened to me!"

                                                       ~~~

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“This is Morgan Winters, Barely Alive on GLNS News!” - Part 1

Hey!  Posted this here and on the forum. Those of you who know me there will know this will not be the first time I've posted the first part of a story, promised to deliver more, and then abandoned the project within, like, an hour, but trust me, guys... I'm going to finish this one this time. I can feel it in my bones.

Anyway, something about the concept of a news reporter catching a cold has been weighing on my brain for just the longest time so I bring you this first part, in which our news reporters does *not*, in fact, catch a cold yet.

There is a little bit of sneezing and illness stuff at the end, but this is mostly about setting the scene, establishing some characters. I feel like actually having some kind of plot is a nice minimal standard to achieve with storytelling, but this might be why I'm always too lazy to finish telling them. If I do fail to post the second part of this one, my next story will just be called 'woman with a cold who is sneezing' and will just be about someone, like, going to various places.

With that in mind, do feel free to remind me to pick this up if you actually really want to see where this story (kind of inevitably) ends up going.

And, excuse the poor formatting. It is not my strong suit.

"...and despite facing calls to resign, the counselor has confirmed he'll remain in his post. From GLNS, this is Morgan Winters, back to you Alex."

   Morgan yanked the earpiece out from her ear as quickly as she could, and ran a hand through her long black hair.

   "How was that?" she asked Derek, from behind the camera, who gave a simple thumbs up in response. "Good," she said. "Now get me out of here. It's fucking freezing, and these old government buildings never seem to have any heating" "We got a taxi waiting for you outside to get you back to the studio" he replied, as he rewound the footage. "Think we're going to end up back in the van, though, if you ask me. Molly just took a phone call from the boss. Suspect she's going to be looking for you any minute now"

   Morgan rolled her eyes and sighed. "Of course she is. What now? World's tallest scarecrow just collapsed? Local teen gets tongue frozen to lampost? Or are we going to interview the mayor's husband again, and hope he's sober enough to string together a full sentence this time?"

   Derek shrugged. "I don't commission 'em, Morgan, I just film 'em. You'll have to ask her." "I'll have to avoid her, more like. I'm going to the office. I have a mountain of work to catch up on. I don't have time to do some twee interview with Farmer Dan about Potatofest '22, or whatever they want from me." "You do what you want. Taxi's that way, though. Next to the van" Derek replied, smirking, pointing to the east side of the building, and not taking his eyes off of the footage.

   Morgan sighed and made her way to the city hall car park. She spied her taxi from across the road and started to walk towards it when she heard her name in an all-too-familiar and all-too-cheerful tone of voice.

   "Slow down, Morgan" Molly called out, from behind her. Morgan closed her eyes, silently cursed her luck, and turned around to face Molly, who was dressed in a garnet-red beret, that (in Morgan's humble and, admittedly, uninformed opinion) badly compliment her curly, silver-blonde hair.

   "I am so sorry, Molly, I almost forgot to wait for you," she said, forcing herself to smile. "That's alright, I'd just disappeared to make a quick phone call" Molly replied. "From the station," she said after a slightly uncomfortable pause. "Oh, they're always bothering us while we're busy. Well, I best be going, I need to get back to the--" "Could you do me a favor, Morgan?"

   Morgan gritted her teeth, her green eyes lightly glazing over as Molly carried on.

   "You see," Molly continued barely registering Morgan's expression, "the public health department just got in touch. It's that time of year when colds and such things are going around, you see. So, the department was wondering if we could send a reporter down to a local physician's to do a quick cold and flu safety report"

   Morgan shook her head. "No, Molly, no, absolutely not. I told you, I'm done with these... nothing reports. I'm a serious journalist, alright? I have a degree-- two degrees! Two degrees, I have a Bachelors in Communication, and a Masters in Media and Journalism, okay? I should be covering far more serious topics than this. Health- public health isn't even something I know anything about. Can't you ask Alice to do it?" "We did ask Alice to do it!" Molly replied. "And?" "She can't" "Why not?" "Caught a cold."

   Morgan rolled her eyes. "Well, what about Steve or Michael? They should be grateful for any work at this point, to be honest" "No, look, the department wants *you*. They've seen you! They think you have a really down-to-earth personality and a great presentation style. Perfect for delivering this kind of message."

   Morgan paused. "They asked for me?" "Yes" "...and they think I have a great presentation style?" "Absolutely" "And a down-to-earth personality?" "Yeah, maybe. Anyway, look, if you do this, there's sure to be some more work coming your way. Good work, too. Not these fluff pieces, not these interviews with outraged retirees. You get to do what you want." Morgan really thought about it. "...No more local food and culture festivals?" "No more anything, just pure you." "...Fine. Fuck you, but... fine." Morgan replied. "When do they want me?" Molly looked at her watch and looked back up at Morgan. "Half an hour ago."

--------

   It was not often that Morgan got to visit the more affluent side of town. She lived pretty far from here, and the people who did live here were wealthy enough to keep the cameras away from their neighborhood. While she wasn't thrilled about this assignment, she couldn't help but gawp at the mini-mansions, and luxury restaurants that lined the streets.

   Still, all the money and lawyers in the world couldn't keep out the common cold. Almost every face she could spot from the van, was adorned with a red nose, or a tissue pressed tightly against it. Morgan shifted uncomfortably in her seat, as she turned her head towards her phone. She was really starting to regret this.

   After a short drive, in which Molly had to negotiate with an incredibly congested toll-booth operator, the van pulled up outside the district's medical center. Derek scrambled out of the van to get the equipment ready, while Morgan and Molly went inside to meet the nurse they were going to be interviewing.

   "Hey," Morgan said approaching the receptionist at the front desk, who was busy scribbling some notes into a pad. "Morgan Winters, I'm with GLNS news. This is Molly, I was told you both spoke on the phone about an interview?"

   The receptionist looked up from her notepad and something instantly struck Morgan about her appearance. The long, wavy red hair, Morgan had already noticed from a distance. The bright blue eyes were distinctive but didn't immediately catch her notice. No, Morgan's attention was right away drawn to the sore, red rim that ran around the woman's nostrils, that was accentuated by the sudden and thick sniffle she gave.

   "One moment..." she muttered, barely managing those precious m's and n's that would have lent clarity to what she said. She casually reached over a small PA system on her desk. "Ndurse Halloway? GLNS are here" she muttered, or something to that effect, at least. Some tinny, staticky voice gave a robotic reply, and the receptionist looked back up to Morgan. "Just take a seat with the oh-others... ih-ISHIEW!"

   Morgan was grateful that the receptionist was able to grab a tissue. Still, she would have liked it all the more if the receptionist had actually managed to bring it to her nose, some time before letting out the surprising sneeze.

   "Ugh... 'scuse mbe" she mumbled, using the barely touched tissue to blow her already sore nose. "Was the last one standing up until I came in this m-mordi-ih...it'SHIEW!" she sneezed again, clearly an aftershock from the previous sneeze, but this time, thankfully, with the tissue ready to catch it.

   'Last one standing...' Morgan mentally repeated with a degree of exasperation, before directing Molly to sit beside her in the waiting room.

   "We better make this quick, alright? I'm already regretting every second of this..." she whispered to her assistant, as the woman beside her, blew her nose for the fourteenth time. "Why, what's wrong?" she asked "What do you mean, what's wrong? This place is gross. I feel gross. I want to go back to the office, where it's... I mean still gross, but less gross than this" "Oh, hush. Don't worry about it, it's just a quick interview, bit of filming of... doctor-y things, and we can do the V/O back at the studio" "I don't know how you can be so calm about this" Morgan snapped, as the man next to Molly launched into a coughing fit. Molly simply shrugged. "I'm not bothered. I had my flu shot" she said, confidently. "Do flu shots protect against colds?" asked Morgan Molly paused for a moment. "I mean, yeah, of course, they do. They're basically the same thing. Wouldn't be much point in a flu vaccine if you're just going to get a cold anyway, surely!"

   Morgan was skeptical, but before she could open her mouth to object, she heard her name called from the reception.

   "Ms. Widters?" the receptionist asked, holding a tissue to her nose as she spoke. "Ndurse Halloway will see you both dow..." she managed, before sneezing three more times into the tissue. As she pulled it away, Morgan winced at how sore and red her nose was starting to look. At that point, Morgan realized that there was nothing she could do to protect herself. From the moment she walked into the health center, she was a dead woman walking.

[redrebecca]

Infected

He’s adamant that it’s not infected but you think it is.

Warning(s): I don’t know how sensitive you guys are but it mentions blood once.

A/N: Based off Shawn’s interview with Elvis Duran about the possibly infected piercing. Just a lil disclaimer but i know nearly nothing about cartilage piercings so sorry if this isn’t 100% accurate. Feedback is always appreciated, have a nice day!

Words: 1.5k

*

You sat on the couch, your side flush against Shawn. The sound of his heartbeat was the only thing you could hear, the continuous and repetitive thumping that filled your ears was enough to calm you down, make you feel at home. You felt his gaze on you and tilted your head slightly to get a better view of his profile.

“Hi.” He said. His sweet Canadian voice was hushed and gentle as if the calm atmosphere was so fragile that even the smallest noise would cause it to splinter.

“Hey.” You replied, also whispering – in his hectic schedule, moments like this held so much value to both of you that they were almost priceless.

 You hummed as he kissed you, his soft lips moving perfectly with yours. You could still taste the sweetness of his herbal tea he had been sipping earlier, the fruity taste only intensifying as his tongue gently parted your lips. He smiled into the kiss as he pulled you into his lap, his hands briefly leaving your hip to manoeuvre your legs so they rested either side of his thighs before they hastily returned to your back. He pulled you closer so his chest was pressed against yours. You trailed your hand up from his shoulder to his hair. However, before you could slide your fingers through his curls, he hissed. His head jerked away from your hand, causing your teeth to roughly clash against his. His hand left your waist immediately and hovered over his ear.

“Babe what’s wrong?” You asked as his eyes squinted in pain. He groaned.

“My ear.” He mumbled, still trying to soothe wherever the pain was coming from.

“Your ear?” You said, unsure whether you had heard him correctly or not.

“Yeah, the piercing.” He said as if it was obvious. You furrowed your eyebrows, you couldn’t remember exactly when he had got it and you certainly weren’t a medical genius, but you were sure it wasn’t meant to still hurt.

“Let me look.” You said whilst reaching to pull his head back towards you, to which he hesitantly obliged. You gently placed your fingers on his chin to move his face so you could see the piercing better. You gasped slightly as you saw it, your fingers pushing a few stray curls away so you could see it without your view being obstructed by his hair. The area around the metal ball was an angry red and inflamed. “Tell me if this hurts.” You whispered, waiting for his affirmative nod before pinching the back of the earring with your thumb and index finger. You slowly twisted it, not wanting to cause him anymore pain than you had already.

Instead of a hiss like last time, a whimper left his lips, his hand frantically reaching up to grab your wrist. You released the back and unsuccessfully tried to keep yourself from gagging as beads of blood appeared around the metal bar.

His hand was still wrapped painfully tight around your wrist, his eyes scrunched and his top row of teeth biting his bottom lip.

“Babe, let go.” You murmured. Almost instantly you were released from his grasp and his eyes meeting yours, ensuring he hadn’t hurt you. You gave him a reassuring smile before you returned your gaze back to his ear.

“Honey, I think it’s infected.”

Shawn shook his head. “I’m sure it’s not, I’ve cleaned it every day.” He said. It sounded as though he was trying to reassure himself as well as you. However you weren’t swayed by his denial, instead you reached for your phone and started to scroll through your contacts until you found the local doctors surgery.

“What are you doing?” He asked, struggling to read the upside-down screen. You didn’t answer and clicked on the ‘phone’ icon. He pushed the top of the screen down with his finger, his doe eyes widened when he saw who you were calling. Before you could react, the phone was snatched out of your hand and the phone call was ended before the receptionist even had the chance to answer.

“What are you doing?” He repeated, his eyes scanning yours as he clutched the phone firmly in his hand.

“It’s infected, you need to get it looked at.” You argued back.

“It’s not, it’s just sore.” He protested, his hand subconsciously reaching up to gingerly touch his cartilage piercing. You said nothing, you just stared at him whilst keeping a blank expression on your face. The man was stubborn, but so were you.

It didn’t take him long to notice your change in manner and your sudden silence. He groaned. “Baby, I promise I’m fine okay?” When your only answer was a raised eyebrow he sighed again. “What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to go to the doctors.” You said firmly.

“But I’ve told you I’m fine.” He tried to reach for your hand but you pulled it away before he could lace his fingers with yours. Your cold exterior nearly cracked when hurt flashed across his face at your obvious rejection but you reminded yourself that this was for his own good.

He stared at you for a minute before his head dropped. “Fine, I’ll go” You finally allowed a smile to break across your face. “But when they say there’s nothing wrong with me I get to tell you I told you so” You hummed, pulling his huge frame towards you.

“Sure you will, Mendes”

*

The next morning, much to your surprise, you managed to arrive at the doctor’s waiting room on time – a rare occurrence with Shawn normally being impossible to get out of bed. Out of the corner of your eye you saw him fiddling with his watch, but you turned your attention to one of the medical posters on the wall to distract yourself from your boyfriend’s fidgeting. However, when his knee started to bounce it was almost impossible to ignore. You gently rested your hand on his knee, softly rubbing your thumb onto the side of his leg. It didn’t take long for his tattooed hand to cover yours, his long fingers easily interlocking with your significantly shorter ones.

His face was calm but his posture revealed the anxiety he was feeling. You leaned over the arm of the chair to rest your head against his strong shoulder, your free hand running up and down his arm. You smiled as you felt his head rest against yours, his shoulders slowly relaxing and his breathing was becoming less erratic by the second.

“Mr Mendes?” The doctor called into the almost empty waiting room causing Shawn’s head to leave yours, allowing you to straighten your neck so you could see the middle aged man who stood in a crisp white shirt. Shawn inhaled deeply before standing up. He didn’t once release the grip on your hand so you were also dragged up from your seat. You opened your mouth to ask him what he was doing, but he stopped you by sending you a pleading gaze. You closed your mouth and squeezed his hand – non-verbally telling him you weren’t going to leave him. He smiled and pressed a quick peck to your forehead the two of you walked hand in hand after the doctor who was leading the way to his room.

*

10 minutes later, the two of you walked out of the automatic doors. A slight scowl was playing on Shawn’s mouth as he clutched the paper bag full of his prescribed antibiotics in one hand, the other still occupied by your hand. You couldn’t help the smirk that tugged at the corners of your lips as you glanced up to see the small bandage they’d put around his piercing. He stopped walking suddenly and turned to face you.

“Just say it.” He muttered gesturing to his bandage-clad ear, his eyes landing on you before darting away again.

“Say what?” You feigned unawareness.

He shook his head in a useless attempt to shake the small smile from his face. “What is it they say? Speak now or forever hold your peace?” You blushed at his blatant mention of weddings – his marriage innuendos were becoming more frequent the past year. You leant up and pressed a loving kiss to his lips. You loved the way his eyes lit up with the smile that brightened his face as you pulled back, effectively washing away the previous scowl.

“I told you so.”

[itskateak]

Oceans and Stars - Chapter 8

Story Summary: A story of how Bucky Barnes falls in love with oceans, stars, and the woman who gave him the reasons to.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Velika Dante King (Fem!OC)

Chapter Summary: Bucky's life isn't easy without her, but he's getting by. And he's getting better. 

Words: 3.2K 

Warnings: Mentions of war, mild language, PTSD, Relapsing, Anxiety, canon typical violence, some fluff, harassment

A/N: I know the words of the song are the same as the last chapter, but that's because that section repeats. 

Masterlist

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

𝓛𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓮. {𝐿𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓁𝒾𝓋𝑒}

Bucky glanced at his gloved hands, fingers laced as he rested his elbows on his knees. The waiting room was silent except for the receptionist taking calls from other patients. A diffuser puffed intermittently, spraying oils into the air. He recognized the smell of chamomile and lavender. It was meant to calm and relax people as they waited. Instead, it just made him more anxious.

He hated waiting in the open like this. He was lucky there wasn't anyone else in the waiting room with him and he was seriously considering leaving without even holding his appointment. The diffuser huffed out another dose of the anxious elixir. 

Steve had offered to come with him, but he didn't want his best friend to see how broken he actually was. In some ways, Steve glossed over the cracks and believed the front Bucky put on when he was having a rough day or week or even month. It had been especially worse now that Velika hadn't been around. 

"James Barnes?" A dark-skinned woman in a pair of jeans and a blue knit sweater called for his attention. She had a pair of thick-rimmed glasses pushed up onto her crown, holding her unnaturally colored box-braids back. Her eyes were a soft brown, which matched her soft and friendly smile.

Bucky stood slowly to not startle her and gave her the kind of smile people give when they hold doors open for others. 

"I'm Doctor Naomi Winters. It's nice to meet you, James." Naomi extended her hand to him in a manner that didn't pressure him to return it. He did, though, and shook her hand.

"Bucky, please." He kept his left arm at his side and still. 

"I'll make a note of that because I'm sure I'll forget in the next five minutes. It's been a long week. Come on back." Naomi rolled her eyes at herself and gestured with her head.

Bucky followed her down the hall. The walls were painted an awful beige color that reminded him of the sun-faded flour sacks he hauled down on the docks. Random paintings and pictures were hung between offices. Some were of plants and flowers, others were what he thought were meant to be inspirational quotes but really just sounded condescending.

Naomi opened a door to his right and invited him in, shutting it softly behind him. The room was a cool grey with paintings hung on one wall. A black bookshelf filled with various medical journals and alternative books was pushed into the corner. A plush rug in black was laid out across the floor, one edge of it hidden under a desk with a couple of computer monitors in sleep mode. A comfy looking grey couch was under the paintings and a chair by an end table sat opposite it. A deep red blanket was thrown over the back of the couch and a pair of decorative pillows sat against one of the arms. The room was dim, lit up by warm fairy lights in plastic jars. 

"If there's anything you need to make you more comfortable, please let me know," Naomi said, grabbing a file from her desk and sinking into the chair. 

Bucky nodded and sat cautiously on the couch, unsure of himself now that he was actually in the room with her. She picked up a pen and made a note at the top of the first page.

"Do you need a few minutes to get used to the room?" She asked, pulling her glasses down to rest low on her nose. She looked at him patiently over the top of them.

"I'm okay." He responded, voice much gruffer than he intended. He winced slightly and cleared his throat. "It's fine."

"Okay, Bucky. I glanced over your file and there's a lot to cover. We can start wherever you want and I won't push a subject if you tell me you don't want to talk about it in that session. I want this to be helpful to you and at your own pace," Naomi set her pen down and picked up a steaming mug on the table beside her. She wrapped her hands around it and took a sip.

Bucky nodded hesitantly. Where would he even begin? He furrowed his brow and dropped his gaze to the floor, eyes flickering over the threads of the carpet. There was a lot to cover over his life and finding a place to pull the thread without unraveling the carefully woven web he'd created was more difficult than he expected.

"Alright, I have an idea. I can see you're having a hard time trying to find a place to start. We can start with the intro survey you filled out and talk about each section. This will allow me to help diagnose you properly." Naomi spoke softly and with an evenness that was already loosening the tension in his shoulders.

"Okay." Bucky nodded again, lacing his hands together again. 

"You checked most of the boxes for the anxiety parameters. Let's talk about that first." Naomi set her cup aside and took her pen up again. 

Bucky took a deep breath. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

"You okay, Bucky?" Steve checked in with him, putting a hand on his shoulder. They were between meeting people as the groups were being switched out.

"Yeah, why?" Bucky glanced at him before smiling to a fan who had called his name. He waved in the direction of the shout. The sea of people in line didn't let him pinpoint exactly who had said his name.

"I'm just making sure. It's a big crowd and it's a lot of people," Steve said, taking a step away as the next group of people were brought in.

"I'm okay. Promise." Bucky gave him a reassuring smile and had his attention diverted by one of the convention's staff. He greeted the person in front of him, making casual conversation and giving them a hug when they asked. He smiled for a photo, a warm feeling in his chest. 

People had been wary to accept him at first. He hadn't attended public events like this often. He would sit on panels and do interviews, but other than that, he never did meet and greets. After attending therapy for a few months, he had felt stable enough to attend a short one.

A small boy, maybe ten, approached him with wide eyes and a smile. His mother stood behind him, a hand on his shoulder. 

Bucky opened his mouth to say something when he noticed a pin on the boy's shirt. Immediately, he kneeled to be on the boy's level and pulled his sleeves up to the middle of his forearms. 

"Hi!" Bucky signed.

The boy's eyes widened further in surprise. Even his mother seemed a little surprised. They had expected Clint Barton to know sign language since he was hard of hearing, but they really didn't expect Bucky Barnes, the ex-Winter Soldier, to know sign language.

"Hi!" The boy beamed.

"How are you?"

"Excited and happy to talk with you. How are you?"

"A little nervous. My sign is rusty. But happy to talk with you, too. What's your name?"

"My name is James."

"My first name is James, too. But everyone calls me Bucky." He tucked a piece of hair behind his ear. "What's been your favorite part about the con so far?"

"Meeting you." James ducked his head sheepishly. "Your arm is so cool! I really liked the-" James broke into a flurry of signs that Bucky couldn't keep up with. 

"Hold on! Slow down, please. I can't understand at that speed." Bucky chuckled at his enthusiasm. It made his heart swell.

"Sorry. I got excited. I talk fast when I'm excited. I really liked the red star on your silver arm, but I know it was tied to really bad things in your past so I'm happy for you now that it's gone. Your new arm looks really, really pretty! I love the gold designs." James' enthusiasm wasn't dulled even with the slower signing. He was nearly bouncing on his feet.

"Thank you. I didn't design the appearance but I really like it, too. Shuri was excited the whole time she was fitting it. It's not as glitchy as the silver one, which means less time I have to spend around the compound missing an arm." Bucky wrinkled his nose up in mock disgust before chuckling. "Did you see anything cool today or buy something from the vendors?"

"I got this replica of your .... and meeting all of you guys was really fun!" 

Bucky furrowed his brow and looked to his mother, repeating the sign he didn't understand and asking for its meaning. 

"Oh! Motorcycle. That's not a sign I've seen before. I usually fingerspelled it. Would you like to take a picture?"

"Yes, please!"

"Do you mind if I use my phone to also take a photo?" Bucky verbally asked James' mother but signed as well so James could understand him.

"Go ahead!" 

A staff member took Bucky's phone from him and he wrapped his right arm around the boy. He held his left hand up with the sign for I love you and smiled. 

James' mother counted down with sign and snapped a few photos. The staff member followed her lead. They handed Bucky's phone back to him and he nodded to them in thanks.

"Can I give you a hug?" James asked with a shy smile. Bucky opened his arms up and nodded. James threw his arms around his shoulders, squeezing tightly. Bucky squeezed him back, rocking from side to side slightly.

James' mother tapped James on the shoulder and signaled it was time for them to move on. James pulled back and waved, thanking Bucky. 

"I love you, James. You're a superhero."

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

Bucky wandered through the bookshelves, head tilted inquisitively as he read the titles. His hands were sunk into his pockets. He'd discovered this small bookshop with Velika on accident. They had been wandering through New York's downtown areas when the rain had suddenly started to pour down. They found shelter in the family-owned bookshop tucked between a thrift store and a business office.

He pulled a book that had caught his attention from the shelf, reading the synopsis curiously. He'd been reading a lot more, finding it enjoyable again. Usually, his mind would wander while reading, and his thoughts would be completely unrestricted. Now, he could read for hours and be uninterrupted by his intrusive thoughts.

The synopsis wasn't as intriguing as he'd hoped so he put it back in its place and continued down the row.

A scoff behind him interrupted the quiet calm of the shop, but he paid it no mind. He did step closer to the shelf in case it was someone wanting to pass behind him. He took up a good amount of space in the small aisles and didn't want to be a bad person.

"I see you're letting anyone in here." The voice was muffled, and obviously feminine, but he heard it clearly. Blame his superhuman hearing.  

"What do you mean, Loraine?" The owner, a kindly old Jewish man, asked in a gentle voice.

"You let a criminal in here." She whispered. "He deserves to be in jail. Not browsing your shelves."

"He has done no harm and he is quite kind. You would know if you talked to him. He's a hero. He saved my mother from certain death when he was a Howling Commando. This bookshop wouldn't exist if not for him. If you are going to continue, then you will leave." The owner's voice was firm and the door slammed closed shortly after. "I'm sorry about her, Mr. Barnes."

"You don't need to be sorry, sir. It's completely alright. I'm used to it." Bucky rounded the end of the shelf with a soft smile.

"But you shouldn't be. You should not be judged on the actions you could not control but rather the actions you did. That is what makes you the man you are." The owner extended his hand to Bucky.

"I have never asked your name." Bucky shook his hand firmly and smiled.

"Mendel Belenky. It is a pleasure to truly meet you, Mr. Barnes." Mendel said in a wistful tone.

"Please, just call me Bucky. Would you like to talk sometime about your mother and the war?" He offered, shoving his hands back into his pockets.

"I would love to, Bucky. And know you are always welcome in my store." Mendel's warm eyes crinkled up as he smiled. 

"Thank you."

"Now, I haven't seen that lovely woman that is usually with you in awhile. Did you two break up?" Mendel asked.

"Ah, no. We weren't dating. We're just friends. Velika is currently fighting on the frontlines of a war between her homeland and her birthland." Bucky explained, face flushing lightly.

"I do hope she comes home. And you finally ask her out." Mendel winked and returned to the counter. 

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

𝓖𝓻𝓸𝔀 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓰𝓻𝓸𝔀. {𝒢𝓇𝑜𝓌 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝑔𝓇𝑜𝓌}

"So, how has the last week been?" Naomi asked, settling in her chair with a sigh. She flashed him a genuine smile as she picked her ever steaming mug of tea up.

"I didn't have any nightmares. At all." Bucky grinned, a feeling a pride spreading through his chest. 

"That's great! That's really good!" Naomi's smile grew and she wrote it down on the notepad. "How many times did you feel overwhelmed or anxious this week?"

"Twice. I went on a mission Monday to Wednesday, so I was nervous beforehand. The second time was after I got out of the shower. I was thinking too much and it just hit me." Bucky stretched his right hand against his left, gloves tucked away in his pocket. He'd stopped wearing them as much in public.

"Any progress made is good. You were overwhelmed and anxious five times at the time of our last visit and you had two nightmares. I say that you're definitely getting better with every week." Naomi made another note. "Let's talk about fears this time since you mentioned feeling like you have irrational fears last time we met. Can you tell me more about that?"

"It sounds ridiculous, but I'm terrified of falling. Heights don't bug me, but falling? It scares me." Bucky sighed, leaning back against the couch. "Ever since I fell off the train and into that ravine, I just...I dunno."

"It's perfectly rational, Bucky. You fell something like five hundred feet. Anyone would be scared to fall after something like that," Naomi said.

"Jeez, you sound like Velika. She nearly said something identical to that a couple of years ago." Bucky smiled fondly at the memory.

"Tell me about that, then. And tell me about her."

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"Bucky, there's two on your tail!" Nat shouted from across the room before swinging herself around a guy nearly twice her height.

"Copy that." Bucky turned and engaged with the two men who had followed him. They weren't anywhere close to being a match for him. He continued towards the main server room, hand on the top of the pistol strapped to his right thigh.

"You guys have five minutes to get back out here before the charges go off. Get a move on!" Tony ordered through the coms.

"Yeah, yeah. We're movin' as fast as we can." Bucky ducked into a hall, firing rounds off at the people coming at him. He heard someone approaching from behind him but he wasn't concerned. 

A round went off behind him and an exasperated sigh followed. "Barnes, you nearly just got your head blown clean off. What the hell was that?" Natasha asked.

"I...thought Velika was here again. Thought she had my six." Bucky admitted in a quiet voice. Nat's expression changed and she patted his arm sympathetically.

"I know, Bucky. We all miss her."

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"You son of a bitch!" Sam howled, nearly coming across the kitchen table in rage.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did you say something, Wilson? I couldn't hear you over the sound of all this money." Bucky dramatically fanned himself with millions of dollars worth of Monopoly money. He had a shit-eating grin as he watched Sam turn red in rage.

"He cheated. He had to have cheated." Tony threw his money onto the board in frustration.

"That's it. You're banned from playing Monopoly with us ever again." Nat threw a handful of popcorn at Bucky and he started laughing.

"Sleep with one eye open, Barnes. You're gonna pay for taking away my win." Sam fumed, crossing his arms.

"Whatever you say, Wilson. Whatever you say."

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓼𝓲𝓷𝓰.

Bucky leaned his head back against the seat of the couch, emotionless gaze staring at the grey wall. He hadn't slept for the last two days and he was exhausted both physically and mentally. He'd been doing so well and suddenly it all fell apart. So here he was, sitting on the floor of his therapist's office.

Naomi settled next to him, reaching over his legs to set a mug of tea on the solid floor. She held her usual cup in her hand, sitting cross-legged and facing the wall with him. He wasn't ready to talk. He felt numb. Shattered. His arms laid limply in his lap and he stared blankly ahead.

"If you need anything, you just have to ask. When you're ready to talk, I'll be here. I've cleared the rest of my schedule so you can be here as long as you need." Naomi quietly broke the silence.

"You didn't have to do that," Bucky muttered, voice gravelly and hoarse. His gaze didn't waver from the grey wall.

"I didn't, but I felt it was the best option for you. I felt it was what you needed." Naomi took a sip of her tea. "I will be here whenever you're ready."

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

Bucky felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he pulled it out to check the notification. Rain tapped against the window, breaking through the soft jazz music playing from an old record player. He unlocked his phone and navigated to Instagram. A memory had popped up from two years ago. He clicked on it and couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face.

The photo was of him and Velika on the fallen tree above the river. She had her braid pulled over her shoulder, a bright smile on her face as she leaned against his shoulder to be in frame. His left eye was squinted because they were facing the sun, but he was smiling as well. Today's adventure included nearly falling into a river because that one wanted to sit on a tree above the water.

"Let me see her," Mendel said, shifting his glasses further down the bridge of his nose. Bucky looked at him with mild confusion. "Oh, don't pretend it isn't her. I know that smile when I see it."

Bucky turned his phone around to show him the photo and Mendel smiled with a nod. "She is beautiful. An angel, yes?"

"You have no idea."

                       ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅ 

Bucky laid on the roof with his left arm under his head, watching the stars. It wasn't the same without Velika, but it brought him comfort on the nights he couldn't sleep. He played with her dog tags as he stared, a slight smile on his lips.

"I love you, Velika," He whispered to the moon.

𝓨𝓸𝓾'𝓵𝓵 𝓼𝓲𝓷𝓰. 𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓯𝓵𝓸𝔀.

Taglist-

[francoiserenaldt]

week one

prologue | next week 

warnings: cussing (and lots of it), angst

word count: 1860

“Indefinitely? Fuck,” Desirée muttered, covering her face with a pillow. This was going to be a disaster. “You have got to be kidding me.”

“Well, I guess I should call Stacy and tell her to turn around.” Andy scratched his neck. “We’re not gonna be able to leave for a while now.” 

“I can’t believe this is happening right now. This is actually the worst thing that could happen.” Desirée groans, pulling her head away from the pillow.

“Hey, I’m not that bad.” Andy teases.

“No, you’re not. It’s just...I had an interview for Vogue lined up to start on Monday. I’ve been interning and writing papers for months to get it and now…” She closes her eyes, willing the tears away. 

“Damn, I’m sorry. You would’ve killed it, I bet.”

“And now I guess we’ll never know.” Her eyes fly open as a realization hits her. “What the hell changed in less than 24 hours? They know that’s not enough time to pack anything and leave.”

“I don’t know, but we’ll figure this out, okay?”

She nods and he disappears into the bedroom. When she glances back at the TV, the time reads 4:35 AM. She rolls her eyes and tries in vain to go back to sleep.

And so it begins.

Sunday, August 3rd, 2023 - Day 1 of quarantine

She eventually gets off her ass around 8 AM and finds something to wear. She settles on a pair of black Nike sweats and her shoes from yesterday. 

One look at her phone notifications shows an unethical amount of missed calls and text messages from her parents, all of which she ignores. An hour later, she gets texts from Stacy.

stacy: just touched down in boston, hope you’re safe

desirée: great! you get to the airport okay?

stacy:  hell no. the police presence at the border is insane. I saw them cornering every car that tried to leave after me! I was lucky they got distracted.

desirée: holy shit it’s even worse than i thought

stacy: how are you getting back to nyc?

desirée: i’m def not w that border thing

stacy: so you and andy are...

desirée: stuck w each other for the moment. it should be fine.

stacy: are you sure, babe? 

desirée: it’s not like i have a choice.

stacy: if you say so. stay safe!

desirée: will do!

“Hey.” 

Desirée looks up and he’s there, dressed comfortably in sweats that show off his muscular build. He looks good and, if the way her eyes linger is any indication, he knows it. She should’ve replied 5 seconds ago, but the second-best time to say something is probably now. 

Speak, dammit.

“Hey. What’s up?” Her voice, thankfully, doesn’t betray her internal monologue. Andy doesn’t seem to notice.

“Since we’re gonna be here for a while, I should probably show you how everything works around here.”

The next hour is spent learning about where the dishes go, how to properly turn on the shower and all of the boring home life things. Throughout the tour, she notices the ways he’s changed since she was last with him. For one, he cooks now, and he has a relatively organized kitchen with spices and sauces. But she still gets some glimpses of who he was before California. He still eats with plasticware because “it doesn’t make sense to have silverware in a place where you don’t live all the time”, which is incredibly moronic thinking and she tells him so, he still wears oversized shirts to bed, and he still smells like his signature spicy cologne when he gets close to her. He’s still so easy to talk to, always knows exactly what’s on her mind and when there’s more to the story than she’s letting on and-

Holy shit.

This can’t already be happening.

As her luck would have it, the apartment he normally stays in alone only has one bed and he refuses to let her sleep on the couch again, so they share the bed. 

The tears only come when she sleeps with her back turned to him, kicking herself for ever letting him go. 

Monday, August 4th, 2023 - Day 2 of quarantine

In the morning, Desirée wakes up with his warmth against her back. One look down finds his arms loosely wound around her body in a way they definitely weren’t when she fell asleep.

Once she begrudgingly gets out of bed, she makes the call to the higher-up at Vogue and tells them the news. She wants to believe that the bored tone the receptionist uses when she delivers the news is just an attempt at a brave face and they secretly are very disappointed that she couldn’t make it. 

She wants to cry. 

Instead, she goes into the bathroom and gets ready for the day. Apparently, her attempts at a facade weren’t as effective as she thought as Andy stops her in the bedroom.

“Are you okay?” 

“Yeah.”

“You’re obviously not okay, Desirée.”

“So why bother asking, then?” She snaps. “It’s been a hard enough morning without you trying to psychoanalyze me, so please spare me the effort.” 

“Look,” Andy snaps, “I know you’re upset about your thing in New York, but I don’t deserve that.”

“You know what, Andy? You’re right. You don’t deserve that. So I need you just leave me alone for a second because I’m in an incredibly shitty mood and this,” she waves a hand between the two of them, “isn’t helping.”

“Do you think being an asshole is going to help?” Andy raised an eyebrow. Desirée only offered a huff in response. “So I’m going to ask you again. What’s wrong?”

“You’re clearly not letting this go, so...I had to call Vogue that I’m stuck in quarantine in the middle of nowhere in Oregon and that I won’t be there in time to start the internship,” Desirée speaks slowly, not far from tears. “The lady listening couldn’t have given less of a shit if she tried.”

“Now was that so hard?” Andy gave her a small smile and opened his arms, clearly intending for her to hug him. She holds out at first, glaring at him. He tilts his head slightly as if to say, Come on already! and she runs into his arms, finally allowing the dam to break. He strokes her back as she cries, closing his eyes to hold back his own. Once her sobs lessen, she whispers something in his ear and he almost misses it. 

“You’re the worst.” 

Tuesday, August 5th, 2023 - Day 3 of quarantine

To help her move on from her internship, Andy attempts to teach her how to play video games. 

Attempts being the operative word.

She’s admittedly stubborn and confused about everything and Andy is entirely too amused about the entire thing. This goes on for hours until eventually:

“Maybe I could just watch?” 

So that’s what they do. She sits while he plays his game, stopping every now and then to explain how to make certain moves and unlock certain weapons. She lays her head in his lap. They don’t talk about it.

Wednesday, August 6th, 2023 - Day 4 of quarantine

On Wednesday, they drink. Wine bottles were lined on the coffee table in front of the couch as Desirée’s legs rested on Andy’s lap. She feels his thumb running softly along her calves as she stares at the ceiling. 

“I’m sorry I was being a bitch on Monday.” Desirée murmured, her head hanging on the arm of the couch. “I haven’t done that in a long time. I thought I was getting better at not being so...me.”

“You wanted space and I pushed.” Andy squeezes her calf. “I’m sorry, too.”

Maybe it’s the wine or the way his hand feels on her leg, but she feels emboldened in a way she hasn’t in years. So emboldened that she finally asks:

“Why didn’t we end up working it out?” She whispers softly. 

The question lingers between them. The thought had plagued her thoughts ever since that first night, and the morning after, but she’d never dared to say it aloud before this moment. 

“We were headed in two different directions,” Andy says after a while. He turns to face her and forces a smile, which she returns. “You were going to New York City to become some big-time stylist and I was going to Los Angeles to be a basketball player. Our lives were just going to be too different.” 

She remembers what she’d told him years ago; that their lives were just beginning and their relationship had no future in them. But 4 years later, she’s finding that her heart beats just as fast when he winks at her and hugs her as it did before. And she’s not imagining the redness on his cheeks when she lets her gaze linger too long or the feeling of his arms tightening around her in the morning. 

Of course, that was never the problem, was it?

“I wish we would’ve figured it out.”

“Me too.”

He sleeps with his back to her. They don’t talk about it.

Thursday, August 7th, 2023 - Day 5 of quarantine

Thursday, and the rest of the week frankly, is spent looking at the news. The cheery news anchor, who’s broadcasting live via Skype, promises that everything will be over in a couple of weeks, but independent news outlets are projecting that citizens of Westchester County should expect to stay in their homes for the next couple of months. 

They finally name the new age plague cutis dissolutitis, but everyone sticks to calling it the Westchester Plague. Apparently, high pH bacteria erode the skin until the person has no outer layer of protection left. They have yet to figure out how the disease is transmitted. There have been 3 casualties so far, and each one has been due to suicide rather than the disease itself. 

“Holy shit,” Andy gasps as medical professionals bicker like middle schoolers on the TV screen. “Do you really think it’s only going to be a couple of weeks?”

“No,” Desirée replies. The monosyllabic response is horrifyingly final.

She wants to be wrong.

Friday, August 8th, 2023 - Day 6 of quarantine

On Friday, the first case outside of Westchester County is reported. 

“A 25-year-old woman has contracted the Westchester Plague in Big Bear, California. The patient has claimed to not have been to or from Westchester in her lifetime. The governor of Oregon has scheduled a press conference this afternoon. More at 12-”

Andy turns off the TV. 

Saturday, August 9th, 2023 - Day 7 of quarantine

On Saturday, they run out of food. 

Neither wants to leave the other alone in the house, so they tentatively head to the nearest grocery store. They grab the essentials.  In the checkout line, everyone stands 6 feet apart from each other. Every person who dares to be out, save for her and Andy, is wearing gloves and a mask. Boxes of both items are given to each shopper as they exit the store. 

Each day, life comes closer and closer to becoming a dystopian nightmare. As they return back to Andy’s apartment, she wonders if she’ll start calling it home soon.

[runawayface]

Taking a tiny break from my behemoth of a fic before it consumes my soul to write a little ficlet of Maru’s job interview for the clinic.

~*~*~*~

It had only been one full season since Doctor Harvey Higgins had taken over the Pelican Town Clinic after the previous doctor of over thirty years had retired.  He had spent the last year working very closely with the previous doctor but now, he was on his own.  With winter fast approaching, Harvey knew that he would need to hire an assistant to help him with clerical duties around the clinic so that he wouldn't fall behind when flu season reared its ugly head.  He had posted a 'Help Wanted' ad to the community bulletin board and was able to set up interviews for four potential candidates.  After completing interviews with Sam, Shane, and Penny, the last candidate on his list was Maru.  Harvey had only been in Pelican Town for one year and didn't know too terribly much about Maru, other than the fact that she was the daughter of the town carpenter.

When the clock on the wall turned 3:25 in the afternoon, Harvey could hear the bell on the clinic door jingle as Maru stepped into the clinic.  Already he appreciated the fact that she arrived five minutes early and had dressed professionally.  The few times he had seen her around town, she usually wore a colorful shirt with a pair of overalls.  Now, however, she was dressed in a nice pair of black dress pants, a pale blue button-up blouse, and plain black pumps.  It was clear to Harvey that she must not walk in heels often as she stumbled uncertainly across the room to approach the front desk.

"Doctor Higgins," Maru said timidly, extending her hand over the counter.

"Please, you can call me Doctor Harvey," he said pleasantly, taking her hand in his for a handshake.

"I'm here for my interview to apply for the open position you have in the clinic," she said quietly.  Her hand shook as she reached over the counter and presented him with a copy of her resume.

"I must say, you're the only applicant I've had that brought in a formal resume," Harvey said with a light chuckle.  Maru's cheeks flushed and she looked mortified.

"Oh, I'm sorry, is that alright?" she asked, biting her bottom lip.

"Perfectly fine," Harvey answered with a nod.  "Please, take a seat in the waiting room and we can begin your interview."

As Maru slowly turned toward the seating in the waiting room, she appeared to hesitate for a moment as though trying to decide which was the best seat to choose.  Harvey couldn't help but smile, she appeared to over-think things in very much the same way that he did.  She finally settled on the seat closest to the doors that led to the back, no doubt to be closer to the clinic in the event of a tour.  Harvey took a seat one away from Maru to provide the poor girl with a buffer seat.  She appeared very nervous.

"Well, in case my listing hadn't made it clear, this position is primarily for a receptionist," Harvey began.  "The majority of your duties will be to answer phones, give appointment reminders, file paperwork, that sort of thing.  Do you have any questions for me so far?"

"What is the likelihood that I would be interacting directly with medical procedures?" Maru asked curiously.

"An excellent question," Harvey said kindly.  He absentmindedly pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he answered.  "There is the potential to eventually learn basic medical practices, but that would be very far down the line. There is only so much that you can legally do without proper medical training.  Don't worry, I certainly don't expect you to administer stitches or anything like that.  That's not to say you won't have ANY interaction at all, of course you'd still need to be able to stomach seeing some of the more extreme emergency cases as they come through the doors and I would possibly need assistance getting the patient onto a bed if they were unable to do so, but that would be all.  Please let me know now if the sight of blood or open wounds will be an issue for you."

"I'm not concerned about having the stomach for it, my mom's the local carpenter and she's certainly had her share of graphic injuries," Maru said with a small nod.

"Speaking of your mother's business, I see from your resume that you have experience with bookkeeping for her carpentry business," Harvey commented, glancing at the resume in his hands.  "Can you tell me more about that?"

"I used to help my mom handle the books for her business, but when it started to interfere with my studies, I stopped," Maru explained.  "But now that I'm done with high school, I believe that I'm ready to take on a real employment opportunity."

"Just to be clear, this is a part-time position," Harvey noted.

"I understand," Maru replied with a nod.  "I'm only looking for part-time so that I can spend the rest of my time working towards my degree.  I'm taking online college coursework and I'm hoping to start an engineering program in the next couple of years."

"Engineering, huh?" Harvey commented with a low, impressed whistle.

"I spend my spare time working on robotics projects for fun," Maru said with a shrug.  The nervousness that she had displayed earlier seemed to have vanished as she began going into further detail about her projects.

Harvey became more and more impressed with Maru as the interview went on.  She enthusiastically went over the robotics projects she was working on, the experience she had working in her mother's business, and the classes that she was currently taking for her first semester of college.  Despite her age, Maru's resume was rather impressive.  He had originally been concerned about her people skills when she had entered the clinic so nervously, but now that they were in the midst of the interview, she appeared completely at-ease.  Once Harvey had asked her all of the questions that he had, he rose from his seat and shook her hand once more.

“I think that just about covers it,” Harvey said casually.  “I’ll be reviewing all of the applications this afternoon and I should have a decision made by the end of the day today.”

"Thank you for your time, Doc," Maru said with a smile.  Her smile immediately fell and she suddenly looked extremely embarrassed.

"I'm so sorry, that was unprofessional, Doctor Harvey," Maru said apologetically.

"No, it's fine," Harvey assured her.  "Call me 'Doc', 'Doctor Harvey', just plain old 'Harvey', I'm not picky."

"Thank you for your consideration," Maru said once more, though she still looked a little flustered as she exited the clinic.

The moment Maru had left, Harvey seated himself behind the counter of the front desk to go over all of his options before choosing his new assistant.  None of them were completely qualified, but he had to remind himself that this was not Zuzu City.  He was honestly lucky that there were even four applicants to choose from.  Sam was a sweet kid, but seemed to only be applying out of pressure from his mother.  Being stuck behind the counter of a clinic didn't seem like something he really wanted to do.  Shane had experience working behind the counter from working at his aunt's ranch, however his people skills seemed to be lacking.  For a position that primarily involved interacting with people, oftentimes people who weren't feeling well, Shane didn't seem like the right fit.  Penny seemed to have the people skills and professionalism necessary to work behind the front desk, but the poor girl nearly fainted just at the mention of open wounds.  Although the position wouldn't require working directly with treating patients, she would still need to be able to pull it together to help them into the procedure room and Harvey didn't get the feeling that she could.  Maru, on the other hand, seemed to be more than capable of handling all aspects of the job.  However, at eighteen years old she was the youngest of the applicants and had only just graduated high school.  The only thing she had against her was her age, but she seemed very eager to prove herself nonetheless.  At this point, the choice seemed fairly clear.  Harvey picked up the clinic phone and dialed the number at the top of Maru's resume.  The phone had barely rung a single time before Maru answered it.

"Hello?" Maru answered somewhat breathlessly.  It sounded as though she was still on her way home up the mountain.

"Hello, Maru, this is Doctor Harvey calling you back regarding the interview that you just had," Harvey began professionally.  He could hear Maru go completely silent on the other end of the phone.  "You're hired."

[embeth82]

Living With My 3 Best Friends - Fibromyalgia, Autism & Osteoarthritis

My Journey of Discovery

Written by Emma E. Threlfall

Although I was born with Autism or Aspergers (ASD-1) to be specific my journey of discovery along with that of Osteoarthritis (OA) and Fibromyalgia (FMS) didn’t really begin until my late twenties, early thirties. Around the age of 28 I began to show various and strange symptoms which I now know to all be a part of my Fibromyalgia Syndrome. At the time when they first began rearing their ugly heads they were so vast and varied I didn’t know whether I was coming or going. Let me list them for you here:

Hot flushes

Night sweats

Major fatigue

Swollen / Sore Lymph Nodes in my neck, behind my ears, armpits and even in my lower back (which is not pleasant as reminds me of the feeling when you wind yourself, if you’ve ever fallen on you’ll back you’ll know what I mean)

Headaches

Stiffness

Temperature dysregulation, once I get really cold I can’t warm up for hours and same for heat takes longer to cool my body down

Dull aches all over my body

Muscle cramps, anywhere on my body but mostly in my jaw and eyes

Skin sensitivity

Easily dehydrated - can cause headaches for days

Urinary frequency

IBS issues - constipation, diarrhea, colon cramps, back stomach aches, trapped wind

Poor short term memory

Word blindness - completely forgetting what I say as I’ve been saying it - loosing train of thought mid sentence and being completely to remember really simple words when you’re trying to say something (super annoying, and not the greatest during job interviews)

*Plus a load I’ve probably left out

It took me 5 or 6 years of various doctors visits, a hospital visit, an unnecessary laparoscopic surgery, a change of doctors surgeries, numerous blood tests, urine tests and finally going to a different doctor and bam I get a diagnosis after about 10 minutes in the consultation. The weight I felt lifting off me and just the fact that my now new doctor could just say ‘it sounds like Fibromyalgia’ (and just bare in mind there is no test for Fibromyalgia) was amazing.It then took me a few attempts but about a year or so ago my doctor put me on a medication (a controlled drug in the UK) that is actually an anti seizure drug but also has anti anxiety as well as anti neuropathic pain properties I take 100mg twice a day and I no longer have the pain I once had and it has helped so much with my fatigue which was just crippling. However this doesn’t mean I’m completely pain free I still get frequent headaches usually with my monthlys and also if I get stressed in the least little bit it can cause me to have a Fibro Flare with various symptoms of varying degrees. Fun or what?

At the same time all this was going on I was also starting with back pain, sciatic pain going down the backs of my legs a clicking in my back, and the tightest hamstrings in the world. I went for an X-ray and was told over the phone by the receptionist that I had ‘a little bit of osteoarthritis’ and that was that. I think at the time I was offered paracetamol for the pain, which of course did nothing.

So where does the Aspergers come into the fray, well like I mentioned early you are born with Autism and whilst growing up I of course I knew I was different but it wasn’t until I reached my teenage years that I really realised that I truly did have problems. I will list a few here:

Not being able to deal with change

Being a very anxious child / constantly worrying if somewhere I’m not familiar with

Can’t deal with confrontation or being told off

Prefer living in my fantasy world than living in the real world

Watching my favourite show or films on a a constant loop 

Not quite comprehending what my peers were talking about

Feeling the need to copy my peers to make sure I fitted in / constantly feeling like an outsider

Being sensitive to the extreme causing me to go into meltdowns

Getting easily overwhelmed 

Having depression and anxiety since being a teenager

Having few to no friends / finding it extremely difficult to make friends

Having extreme curiosity / always asking questions needing to know the how where, when and why

Not being able to ask for help at school or work

Not getting jokes / not knowing if people I don’t know well too well are using sarcasm or not

Mumbling when I talk with people I don’t know very well / laughing too loudly and not realising it until other people point it out.

Completely missing the point of homework (this may have something more to do with having a touch of dyslexia, as many people with Autism have)

Having major Social Anxiety / OCD and Agoraphobia 

*Again there is probably many more things that I’ve left out. 

However it wasn’t until I was 34 years of age that taking it upon myself and because the NHS was unable to (because of a postcode lottery) I paid £500 to get a private diagnosis of Autism, and having that confirmation just made everything, not easier but a hell of a lot clearer.

Why you might think am I writing about all three diagnoses here but its not just because I live with all three of them but because I believe that having Autism is the reason I now have to deal with OA and FMS, more on that to come in upcoming posts.

Just hope this blog helps shine a light on one or all three of these conditions for people. Just to note also these are things I’ve experienced so it may be slightly different for other people with these conditions as they can be as individual as the person who has them, so I’m purely writing this from my perspective, what I’ve encountered and come up against.

My journey is far from over and I’m discovering new things about my conditions all the time. For example I now also have to deal with Non-allergic Rhinitis, which believe it or not was making my Eustachian Tube in my in ear swell, that probably along with my TMJ (damaged jaw, but that’s another story), leading to me being a decibel or two deafer. I now have a steroid spray to reduce the inflammation - and it works I’m not as hard of hearing when I use that - awesome! Sorry just thought that was interesting but I digress. The point is where I am now at the moment I’m at my most equilibrium I’ve ever been at in my life, but that’s not to say a major life stressor could not really knock me off course and I am very aware of that and constantly try and find ways to keep myself calm on a day to day basis - again more of that in future posts. What I’m trying to say is getting a diagnosis is not a destination, there will never be a magic pill that gets rid of all your ills; having a conditions is like being on a continual journey of learning and discovery, educating and coping but where these type of conditions can feel like a life sentence, but they don’t have to.

[sulfurousdreamscapes]

Parts 6/6 complete.

“You want to fuse with your cat?” Annie asked. “I’m sorry, we only fuse people.”

The man opposite the desk nodded his head with deep understanding, and stared off at the floor for several moments. Annie tried to catch his gaze, and smiled. “If there is someone you know who would consent to fusing with you…”

The man’s eyes gleamed as he looked at Annie. “Consent? What does this mean?”

If it weren’t for the foreign accent, Annie would have considered the question plainly offensive. But she was patient—she had been hired to be patient—and she joined her hands on the desk.

“To consent is to… well, when someone agrees to something, that’s consenting. So if someone agrees to be fused with you, they consent to the fusion.” She wanted to add something, something patronising like ‘Do you understand?’, but she decided against it.

The man stroked his chin, as if to feel a stubble that wasn’t there. “Is it necessary? To consent?”

Annie took a breath. “Yes sir, it’s quite important from a legal and ethical standpoint to consent to a fusion. It’s an irreversible procedure and… well, it’s just necessary, yes.”

The man stared off to his left, clearly disappointed. Finally, he smiled at Annie and got up. With a curt little bow for a goodbye, he left the office. Annie sighed and touched her head.

The next day, the man returned, this time with a woman. He flashed a grin at Annie. “Do you remember? I am from yesterday. George. And this,” he gestured at the expressionless woman, “This is Candace.”

Annie sipped from a glass of water, then smiled and nodded at Candace.

“She consents to fusion. We will fuse,” the man grinned.

Annie stared at the refracted world through the glass of water. She wished she could stay in it forever, ogling at a word out of shape, out of form.

“We will need to vet both of you,” she said. “It’s a lengthy, but comprehensive process that will involve several agreements, interviews, medical check-ups, and…” she tapped her chin with a pen, trying to remember the spiel. Thankfully, she didn’t have to.

“We can do tomorrow,” George said.

“No, no,” Annie resisted the urge to touch her head again. “This will take at least three months. I’m sorry, but that’s the best we can do.”

George frowned, tapped his feet, and stormed out of the room. Candace watched him leave and stuck her hands in her pockets.

“Is your name really Candace?” Annie asked.

“No,” the woman said.

“And did you actually consent to fusion?”

The woman shook her head. “He was paying me for the hour. Said I had to act like he told me to. Except he didn’t really tell me, but that’s okay, whatever. I’m a professional.”

Annie took a breath. “I’m going to tell security not to let that man on the premises again,” she said. “I’d suggest you steer clear of guys like him.”

“Like I have a choice,” the woman said as she left the room.

“I’d be happy to tell you more about how you may fuse with your husband,” Annie said. Her eyes squinted over her wide, corporate smile. “Would this be your first fusion?”

The Salunkhes look at each other for a nervous moment. “Yes,” and “Yeah,” they said.

The one of the left, Chandan, leaned forward. “At least, it is the first for me, I can’t speak for Sanjay,” he winked before his husband jabbed him in the bicep.

It was humorous, but Annie knew by now how humour is often used as a mask. Her mind was already conjuring images of bitter disputes, late-night arguments, bubbling frustrations. It was tiresome. And there was also the jab—such a simple, heartfelt action. After they fused—if they fused—they, or he, wouldn’t be able to jab himself.

“We’ve read up extensively on it, though,” Sanjay said, and adjusted his glasses. “I know you will vet us and everything first, but just to be clear, we’re very sure about this.”

“Yes, we’ve made up our minds,” Chandan smiled at his husband.

Annie smiled wider for a moment before sliding her chair closer to the desk. “Mr and Mr Salunkhe, I want you to know that once you fuse, you will no longer be who you are. Your consciousness will cease to function, and—”

“Basically, we’ll die,” Sanjay said.

“No,” Annie reacted immediately on hearing the ’d’ word. “You won’t. You will be fused. It’s just that your consciousness will be gone for good, giving birth to a new consciousness.”

“But basically, it is still death, right?” Sanjay folded his arms.

Couples like these pissed Annie off. She took a breath. “I’m sure neither of us would like to get bogged down by the technicalities, Mr Salunkhe,” she smiled and carried on before Sanjay could counter. “Now, naturally, we don’t want to change your mind about this—if you’ve made it this far, you clearly have thought long and hard about fusion.”

For a moment, Annie flinched. She remembered George, and her smile faded. What had he been up to?

“Ms Tan?” Chandan leaned forward again and smiled when he caught Annie’s attention again. “I was just saying how committed we are to reducing the population, we really think it’s a waste to be two different people, you know? When you can just be one.” He clasped Sanjay’s hand.

Annie took a sip from her glass of water. “Sorry about that,” she said. “Would you like to use an existing body, or commission a new one?”

The Salunkhes looked at each other again, unsure of their collective answer. “What exactly are the pros and cons of each?” Sanjay asked, clearing his throat.

“Well, there are no pros and cons as such, it’s a matter of cost and sentimentality. Using an existing body will be much less expensive, and well, a lot of couples prefer to retain one of their bodies post-fusion. Of course, you could choose to commission a body, which will take approximately 8-12 working days. Many couples choose than option when they want a really fresh start, you know? I’ve heard some call it the ‘full deal’,” Annie laughed. Professionally.

Once again, the Salunkhes looked at each other, sizing up each others’ opinions and bumbling towards a consensus. “Commission, yes, we’ll commission a body,” they muttered, both to themselves and to Annie.

In her mind, Annie knew they were going to go broke if they commissioned a body. Just another thing she’d learned, being in the business. That meant a shitty beginning for the post-fusion individual, but that wasn’t Annie’s problem.

Her phone lit up and danced on the table. It was a call, and the ID said “Eileen (Candace)”. Annie picked up the phone in her hands and stood up. “I’m terribly sorry, but this is urgent for me. Please remain seated, my assistant Harpal will handle the rest of your appointment.”

“I think he wants to try fusing with me again,” Eileen said in hushed tones. Annie had not expected Eileen to call her so soon after they’d shared numbers. From the whispering, she may be in a bathroom cubicle, Annie thought.

“Report him to the police,” Annie said. The receptionist returned to the lobby from her bathroom break, so Annie smiled at her and exited the office entirely to stand in the corridor.

“Are you serious?” Eileen asked. “I can’t go to the police.” Annie sensed that Eileen wanted to say just one more word, and that it wasn’t a kind word.

“Shit, okay,” Annie said and began making her way to the stairs. “Where is he taking you? Moro?”

“I don’t know,” Eileen’s voice trailed a little. “What’s Moro?”

“It’s a competing company. Uh… they have an oval, yellow logo, looks like a cough drop?”

“I don’t see any cough drops, Annie. Uh, is it okay if I call you that?”

“Everyone calls me Annie,” Annie said, with a smile almost as old as her.

“Cool. So what do I do now? I can’t stay here in the bathroom for too long.”

“Where are you exactly? I’ll come to you. I can scare him off,” Annie stepped out off the last of the steps and strode towards the exit of the office complex.

“I’m in a public bathroom by Tsai Street, near the dock end. ‘George’ is waiting outside. Shit, I think he just messaged me, I heard a notif go off.”

“Dock end?” Annie almost stopped on her way to her car. Switching her phone hand, she unlocked the car and got in. “There’s nothing there, definitely not Moro. Are you sure he wants to fuse with you?”

“I don’t know,” Eileen said, her voice breathy now. Annie heard a flush and a creak.

“Stall him, I’m on my way.”

Eileen hung up.

Annie checked the time as she spun the steering wheel and turned towards Tsai Street. She had maybe forty-five minutes to get back to the office. Harpal wouldn’t snitch, would they?

The streets were packed with people wearing red and yellow, traditional festival colours. Lanterns hung from windows and shops, some of them lit even in the daytime. Even in the poorest districts, people found a way to celebrate their ancestors, even if it meant a hit to the power bill. As crowded as it was, Annie wondered how much more crowded it would have been if it weren’t for fusion technology.

Annie expected her phone to buzz at any moment. The real question was who would be calling: Eileen, Harpal, or her boss, Constance.

When the phone did buzz, it was just a notification—but it was from Eileen. She was sharing her location, and it was at the docks. The closer Anita got to the location pin, the more she felt like she was getting into a situation she had nothing to do with. Something filthy, even.

No, Annie told herself. I need to make sure that girl is safe.

She pulled into a public parking spot, paid the bill, and walked with her phone up. The trail led us to the boardwalk, then the pier, and then the wooden bridges joining the parked boats together.

“What the hell am I doing?” Annie muttered under her breath as she made her way through the bridges and onto the first boat, then onto the second. Annie never got seasick, but she did always find the swaying of boats to be a little disconcerting.

It was mostly old, swarthy men on the decks, chatting by tables and playing digital mahjong. Some of the boats had lanterns, too. The farther away from the pier she got, the more Annie worried about Eileen. This had all the signs of some third-rate, illegal fusion shop, and they don’t care about consent.

When she finally reached the boat in question, she found an open trapdoor, and a flight of stairs leading into a lower deck. Annie confirmed Eileen’s location and descended the steps.

The stairs led to a brightly lit room, with red carpeting, a fake reindeer head mounted to the wood-panelled wall, an antique globe with outdated political borders, and a lot of other tacky shit that reminded her of—

“Oh, no,” Annie groaned.

George turned to look at her. Eileen turned to look at her. The man behind the desk was already staring at her.

“Anita,” he said. “What a pleasant surprise. Here to join me again?”

“Let’s go, Eileen,” Annie said, “You’re not getting fused with anyone here.”

Eileen’s doe eyes were tired, and she looked searchingly at the other people in the room, as if seeking their permission first.

“Get up, Eileen,” Annie said. “I have to be back in ten minutes.”

Eileen got up. George started saying something in his native language, something loud and sharp. Eileen flinched, but she did take two steps towards me. I almost had her wrist in my hands when the man behind the desk spoke again.

“You’ve been away so long, Anita,” he sighed. Eileen looked at him and gasped. Annie looked at him too, and then at the handgun in his right hand, pointed at Eileen. “Not even a ‘hi’ for me?”

Anita had sworn never to speak to him. It only made things worse when she did. This time, she couldn’t think of any words to say, either. She’d seen the man point guns at people before, but not at anyone she cared about.

“Please have a seat, Candace. Eileen. Whatever you like to be called,” the man said. Eileen obeyed, and turned her back to Annie for good measure. The handgun’s dark little hole was still trained on her heart.

“Anita,” the man looked up. “I wish I could offer you a seat, but I only have two. Don’t hold it against me, alright?” He smiled. “But of course you will.”

The phone in Anita’s hand started buzzing and then lit up with a caller ID. It was Harpal. Time was almost up. She could still make it, but only if she dumped Eileen here.

“I didn’t peg you for someone who’d fall in love with a whore, but then I never really pegged you right, did I?” the man cocked his head a little.

Annie’s skin came alive, and she felt herself transcending into dream-space, except now she was carrying real life with her.

“I’m not in love with her,” Annie barked at the man, “I’m saving her from you.”

“It’s good to hear your voice, Anita,” The man laughed and shook his head. “I had to watch your childhood videos so many times, just to remember what you sounded like. I dreamt about you, do you know that? I dreamt you were back, and I could hear your voice.”

Annie felt like she’d been shot, but there was no smoke coming out of the handgun. Just a smile on the man’s lips. Her phone was buzzing again. This time the screen said “Constance”.

“Sounds like it’s an important call,” the man said. “More important than me?”

The man plugged a device with antennae into the computer under his desk. Anita’s phone fell silent, and then the screen dimmed, and then it was dead.

“Now tell me,” the man leaned forward in his desk, gun still pointed at Eileen. “How have you been? Where do you live? Where do you work? Have you been eating right? It doesn’t look like you’re eating enough.”

Anita couldn’t bear to look at that smile, so she focused on the handgun instead. Keep your mouth zipped, she told herself.

“You know I care about you, don’t you, Anita?” the man said. “I care enough about you that I’m willing to shoot these two just to get you to talk to me.”

George frowned and looked at the man now, perhaps not having understood what had been said. Eileen just had her head buried in her hands.

“You’re more important to me than any client,” he said, casually aiming the gun at George.

“Don’t fucking shoot,” Annie said through gritted teeth.

The man’s eyes lit up at her words.

Annie wondered what to call the man. Dad? Mum? Did he have a first name now? Would it be appropriate to call him that? Should she just call him ‘Parent’ and leave it at that? But she didn’t want to be reminded that he was her parent—that he was both of her parents. But she had to at least acknowledge that he had been someone important in her life once, right?

Oh, she was distracted.

“Anita?” the man smiled cordially, chin pulled back, like a schoolteacher.

Should she tell him that no one really called her that anymore?

“What do you think about my offer?” the man asked, “Have you given it some thought, after all this time?”

“It’s not an offer,” Annie said. She had wanted to say the words a long time ago, and she had said the words so many times in her head. Saying them now, for real, was like slipping into a new reality. “It’s a surrender. You want me to surrender my mind and body to you—for what?”

“Why, to be close to you, Anita. So we can be family again—”

Annie clenched her fist. Get out of here, she told herself, but her eyes kept turning to Eileen.

“Are you listening, Anita?” the man sighed. “You will be a part of what we become, something greater, something wiser. You know I respect you. That is the only reason why I want you to fuse with me. Tell me, would I ask you to fuse with me if I hated you? If I thought you were an idiot?”

How much of him was Dad? Anita wanted to know if he was held hostage inside the body, somehow. All she could see was Mom, but surely Dad was somewhere in there too.

“Do you remember when we went to the Moro-Encetal Tower, when I was nine?” Annie asked.

The man paused and drew his chin further in. His eyes searched the desk, as if he was trying to piece together his memories.

“We stood out on the observation floor, where the floor was glass, and you could see the city below you, teeming like little ants carrying grains of sugar.”

“You were eight,” the man said.

“You thought I was eight, but I was nine. You could never really remember my birthday, could you? But Mom always remembered my age, down to the minute of my birth.”

“Of course, you were nine,” the man frowned, eyes darting between the floor and Annie’s eyes. “And it was so beautiful up there, wasn’t it?”

“That’s what I said,” Annie smiled, “That it was beautiful. And you said that it’s scary, that you’re afraid you’ll fall and crush your skull.”

“Yes,” the man closed his eyes. “That’s what I said. You remember so well, even though you are just… you.”

Annie already had her next words in mind, but the gun fired, and she felt her entire body collapse. She looked at her body, searching for blood, searching for a hole, but there wasn’t one. There had been a whizzing sound.

Then another loud crack, and the room lit up for a very brief moment, and Eileen screamed, and Annie stood stunned at the man leaning back in his desk, crimson hole where one of his eyes should be.

The gun was in George’s hand. “Fucking piece of shit,” he growled at the dead man. “You want to shoot me? Me?”

The man in the seat looked surprised, and a little scared. Just like her dad had, back when she was nine and they’d visited the Moro-Encetal Tower.

"I'm sorry, was he close to you?" George said, examining the smoking handgun even as Eileen looked at him, eyes blank but teary.

"No," Annie said as she watched the many, many furrows on George's forehead. He looked through the sights, aiming the gun at a wall.

"You understand, no? He was to kill me," George went on, not looking at either of the women in the room. "It was me or him. It was defending."

"Yeah," Annie said. She tried unlocking her phone, and then remembered that the jammer was still on. She didn't want to risk making moves, though.

"But it is sad," George sighed. "I thought, maybe here they will fuse me. And it was going so well. But then..." he shrugged, hands in the air. "You never know what life brings, is that not right?"

Annie licked her lips. "Could you please unplug the device from the computer?" she asked weakly.

George blinked several times while he stared at Annie. "I am sorry. You know how it is, is that not right? So you can tell the police, and I can go to jail. Will you do that?"

"Do you want me to?" Annie croaked.

"No!" George's eyes almost popped out, furious and red. Eileen jerked in her seat. "What do you think I am? Idiot? I will leave. I will go far away, and then you can bring police and friends here."

"Okay," Annie said. She found it hard to look at anything other than the dead man behind the desk.

George did not expect that answer. He got out of his seat and casually aimed the gun at Eileen. "Candace, will you please come?"

"No," Eileen said.

George sighed and stood silent for what seemed like an eternity to Annie. Finally, he tossed the gun onto the desk and shook his head.

"I have killed the man, but I will not kill a woman," he said, pinching his brow. "I will find someone else. Then I will fuse. It will be okay for everyone."

"Why do you want to fuse so bad?" Annie blurted out.

Again, George had not expected Annie to say those words, and he stood wondering how to answer the question.

"Just be your fucking self," Annie went on. "Do you really want to lose yourself just to be more than what you are? Is that how much you hate yourself?"

George raised his eyebrows and nodded slightly. "You know, when you fuse, you die, right?" he asked. "I want to fuse, so that someone else will live. Someone will a different life, different problems. Maybe it will be better. I have saved money for that. I have sold everything for that."

Eileen got up and walked out of the room like she was leaving a family argument. She didn't seem afraid, just fed up of everything.

"That's really sadistic, you know?" Annie said. "Do you know what that means? Sadistic?"

The man shook his head.

"It means when you're evil for evil's sake. You just want to create someone new, with new problems, instead of solving your own."

George nodded and then shrugged. "It's how we do it, is that not right? It's how we all do it."

Author’s note: I know, I know, it’s probably not a very satisfying end. But I really enjoyed this concept, and I think it’s very likely I’ll work on this idea on a more expanded level in the future. Thank you so much for reading!

[canaryatlaw]

alright, well today has certainly been interesting. my alarm went off bright and early at 7:30, and though I was tired of course the adrenaline for today’s events kicked in pretty quickly and I was off getting ready. I did my makeup to make sure it was impeccable (and it did turn out really nice) and got my freshly dry cleaned suit on with all its buttons and such. Spent about ten minutes eating breakfast before getting an uber to the juvenile courthouse. I was still feeling kind of tired so I decided it would be a good time to use a piece of my caffeine gum, which starts as like a hard tablet thing then turns into gum as you chew it (kinda like a gumball). So I’m chewing it and I’m like wtf there’s like something hard in the gum??? so I pulled it out and oh, that’s definitely a piece of tooth. great. I have about a billion fillings so I figured it had to be one of those, so the first place i checked was the last one that had gotten done that wasn’t all that stable but it was fine, and it ended up being the last tooth on the top left side of my mouth. Well, not much I can do about it at the moment. I got dropped off at the courthouse around 9:15 and just decided to wait around for a few minutes since it wasn’t terribly cold out rather than find another place to stake out for a bit. so I called my dentist’s office and told them what happened, and they said I could come in today at 11:30 or 2:30, I wasn’t sure I’d make it back from the interview for the 11:30 so we decided on the 2:30. I waited a couple more minutes before going inside and going through security, I swear it was the same sheriff that manned that security check point my first summer there that was so much better than the other ones, but after that first summer I moved and my public transit was closer to the other entrance. but they let me through easily, even though I definitely did set off the metal detector 😂story of my life. so I went up to the 4th floor where their office is and ran to the bathroom by the elevators right outside their actual office to make sure everything was good and kill a few more minutes so I wasn’t too obscenely early. Once I figured it would be a decent time to go in I headed in, the email instruction had said to you know let the receptionist know your name and that you’re here for an interview, except I knew the receptionist, so I didn’t have to do any of that lol. They gave me a standard employment application to fill out (which I’ve filled out for them before) which stated you didn’t have to rewrite any info that was on your resume, you could just write see resume, so that’s a lot less annoying, and to email a reference list in afterwards. So I finished that and gave it back, then a few minutes later the woman I’ve been communicating via email with, who I also know, came and got me to take me back to the conference room, which is in the back of the office, so while we were walking there she was like oh I love your suit that’s so cool, is it custom?? so that was cool to hear, I said it was and that a former employer had decided to get it for all of us and she was like awesome, my husband has a custom suit he loves lol. Once we reached the conference room she walked me in and, unsurprisingly, I knew the two people on the other side of the table that would be interviewing me (so just to keep track, I’ve officially known every person I’ve encountered in the office). One of them was actually in my first interview for being a law clerk way back in 2016 and then she ran the training so I knew her quite well, the other guy I didn’t know that well but I was familiar with him and he said he remembered me so that was a good sign. So they asked me about what my experience working with the office had been so I talked about the unfounded reports and the child death case and the permanency hearings and the interviews ranging between a 4 year old who’s been in her foster home for 3 days and is already calling her foster mother “mom” and wants to stay with her forever, to a 16 year old boy involuntarily in a psych ward which he would be stuck in way past the point of medical necessity (like, two months past when he was cleared after 6 days there) to the point where we had to get a court order for DCFS to place him somewhere else- so really running the gamut of different experiences here. So I talked about some of my other legal experiences like working for my dad (which is always a good one to use because I can bs it pretty freely to fit whatever I need it to be) and at the DV clinic and how I handled dealing with judges and clients and all that good stuff. They asked some question about the majority of the population they serve being African American and why I thought that was, so I said that of course the fact that 95% of parents qualify for a public defender means that the vast majority of them are living in poverty (and sadly a lot of people living in poverty in Chicago are African American), and while poverty itself is not child neglect it makes it a lot more difficult when you have to choose between going to work to feed your family and leaving your 8 and 10 year olds home alone which is child neglect, or not being able to afford a bed for your child, which is child neglect. And of course that while child abuse takes place across all socioeconomic levels, those in poverty are often in positions where their actions could be reported to DCFS a lot easier whereas someone with some social standing would probably be given the benefit of the doubt by not reporting when they see what could be evidence of abuse/neglect. There were a few other questions about using common sense and if I could give an example of how I thought that played into the job, so I talked about how when I was reviewing unfounded reports there was one against a daycare owner that had originally been indicated but was unfounded on appeal because the supposed act of abuse had been fairly minor, but the fact that the owner would treat a small child like that to begin with coupled with the fact that she lied to the parents and lied to the investigators and completely refused to cooperate were all big flags for me that this is not someone who should be entrusted with young children when they are capable of such actions, and how I took steps to ensure something was done about the situation. They wanted to know more about the child death motion so I talked about that and how I had researched it and the ultimate conclusion the judge reached that while he did not grant the motion, we were successful in convincing him he had the power to do what we were requesting, it was just the facts that he found unconvincing which of course we don’t have any control over, so I was still pleased with the outcome. And yeah, lots of questions about handling a high case load and all that good stuff, they had said since they lost a lot of staff they were down to like 3-4 attorneys per courtroom when it used to be more like 5-6 so caseloads had been rising again and that I’d have to be prepared for that. I asked them if they had a timetable as for when they would be making hiring decisions, but they were like oh yeah we have no idea, so still don’t know what to do with that other than wait I guess. So yeah, overall I think it went pretty well, I was confident in pretty much all of my answers and I think my passion for the work really followed through. So when we finished I headed out, it was like 10:40 at this point so I called the dentist office back and asked if the 11:30 was still available and they said it was, so I got an uber pool and rode it downtown to where my dentist is located. So he checked it out and got his little camera pen thing in there so I could see, basically a fairly large part of the tooth/filling had come off revealing the silver filling beneath it, which means it wasn’t a filling that we’ve done over the past 3 years I’ve been here with this dentist, but was something my New York dentist had done. The dentist said it was stable for now though, so we made an appointment for next week to put a crown on it. I took the brown line to the bus and then home which was fairly easy. After changing out of the suit I made some lunch and tried to relax for a bit, watched some Reign and made sure I sent the reference list over. I also started picking at my gel nail polish because once you start doing that it’s really hard to stop, so my nails were not in good shape by the end of the day, but that was okay because once Jess got home we met up at the nail place we’ve been going to and got manicures, and then walked over to main street and got dinner and then ice cream because ice cream is always needed for birthday celebrations, even if it’s slightly delayed. Headed home after that and looked at stuff on my phone for a while trying to figure out what I want to do tomorrow. I’m supposed to (and by that I mean I responded yes on facebook) to this event with Illinois prosecutors and government attorneys where there are a bunch of different government agencies attending and will be possible networking attorneys. And of course part of me is like just suck it up and go it could be helpful, but another part of me knows I’m really not interested in any of the options listed, I don’t want to end up in some random government office, and I highly doubt I could get hired by the SA’s office given my dearth of experience with criminal law in the actual courtroom. The one thing that might’ve been slightly interesting was the office of the inspector general, which I would be interested in as they have a division that works inside DCFS that I would love to work for, but those that are attending are apparently from the office of the executive inspector general, which just means they oversee state operations and such and basically has no connection to the DCFS branch. and I mean, what am I gonna do, hand them my resume and ask them to give it to someone at a totally different office? they’re obviously not going to do that, so at this point I’m seriously doubting going, I really just don’t think there would be anything worth going for, but I guess we’ll see. And yeah, after that I showered and got ready for bed and now I am here and I am definitely ready to pass out, so I will end this here. Goodnight darlings. Congrats on being halfway through the week.

[tastyie]

Firefly

@chestnutisland

(A/N): I always wondered why Krillin calls Marron firefly, it seems kind of a random nickname for a kid. So here is my take on it. K18 one-shot, post cell pre buu

Our Firefly

“Alright 18, we have to do it today.” Krillin said waking up and rubbing the crust from his eyes. He was ready to get up and start the day off.

“We’ve already rescheduled with Bulma twice and we are lucky she is even doing it in the first place.”

18 had just opened her eyes.

“Lucky? Isn’t she one of your best friends, she isn’t doing it to help us out?” She said half awake.

“True, but there is no need to reschedule again. We have to go hun’.” He said, shortly after he ripped the blankets off of 18. Trying to wake her up while also exposing what they were going to see Bulma for.

“Don’t you want to know if our baby is healthy?”

“Yeah, I do. You’re right we should go.” She said

18 was 4 months pregnant and her belly is becoming bigger and more defined every day.

They were surprised to say the least when the couple found out 18 had a life growing inside of her. Once the cybernetic woman starting having repeating cases of morning sickness they were curious. Many calls to Bulma and Chichi and a home pregnancy test, eventually led them to founding out the news. 18 was shocked. She had no idea she could bare a child and she was really nervous about it. Although she had no one to blame but herself. Krillin kept on saying how protection during sex  was important so they didn’t have an unplanned child like this. 18 never understood his worrying when it came to that topic, she wasn’t fully human she can’t get pregnant anyways so why go through the trouble of buying pills or condoms. Well after a hand full of their unprotected adult endeavors Krillin’s warnings finally caught up to them.

18 went from shocked to being scared out of her mind, but like he always does Krillin was there to guide her through her inner turmoil and helped her realize how this was a blessing and it would only make them closer. She, or Krillin for that matter, didn’t know how to be parents but they damn well were going to try their hardest.

“Can you make us some Breakfast first dear?” The woman asked.

“Mmm I don’t know I’m still full from that huge dinner from last night.”

“Well sorry, You know I’m eating for two.”

“Ok I’ll cook you something to eat then I’ll call Bulma and see what time she wants us over.”

“All right you get started on that, I want oatmeal, toast and eggs. I’m gonna get some more sleep in the meantime.”

“Now wait a sec-”

“Thanks Krillin, love you.”

Before Krillin had the chance to rebuttal again she took back the blankets and covered her entire body with the thick cloth.

“Bu--- Okay fine be that way. But now I won’t make the eggs how you like them!”

He said opening the door about to walk out of it.

“Yes you will.”

“Yea...I know.”

And with that he closed their bedroom door and headed downstairs.

***********************

Breakfast was okay, 18 ate it in silence because Krillin went to go take a shower. Roshi was also out there but as soon as he saw 18 was going to be in there for more than 5 minutes he left. She had been at the island for 4 years now but they still weren’t on the best of terms Only talking when Krillin was still in the same room. Probably because Roshi kept on being his usual self around her. It was safe to say she didn’t care for that.

“Ok 18 are you ready.”

Krillin came down stairs and saw that 18 was in deep thought, she didn’t even notice him at first.

“Is something wrong 18?”

“Huh? Oh, I was just thinking about this leech inside me.”

“Hey don’t call it that! It's not a leech it's a miracle.”

“Yea, yea I know. But I was just wondering about it. Is it developing well enough, what gender is it, how being a mother will be. Stuff like that.”

“I do too honey, 24/7. Just talk to me whenever about it when you want. We are in this together.”

“I know Krillin. Thank you.”

“Good we can talk about anything you want while we are in the jet car. Speaking of which Bulma wants us there at 10:30 so let’s get going.”

“The jet car is too slow can’t we just fly?”

“No no no! I can’t let you fly when you’re 4 months pregnant!”

“Fine, you can just carry me then.”

“Uh, I guess that will work. Shouldn’t be any strain on you or the-”

“Can you go get my shoes from upstairs Krillin I’m ready to go.” She cut him off.

She found it best to just interrupt him when he was babbling on about stuff, she liked to cut straight to the point anyways.

**********************

They didn’t really conversate on the flight over to Bulma’s, due to the high wind messing with their ability to hear. At least they were close and could just feel each others embrace.

They landed safely and walked into the main lobby of capsule corp building. They saw the receptionist.

“Ahh hello!” She greeted them. “Mr. Krillin and Mrs. Eighteen, Bulma is waiting for you in the…”

She seized talking because 18 just straight up walked past the desk without even pretending to notice the woman talking. She just didn’t really like talking to new people, it was just best to ignore them when she could.

Krillin knew this and usually had to cover up for her.

“Sorry ma’am, she’s just nervous about the ultrasound.” Krillin defended.

“Oh I see, I can imagine then.” She said with a smile, she didn’t blame 18 for her actions.

“Well Mrs. Briefs is in the medical building in Wing E.”

“Thanks, sorry again. Have a good day!”

“No problem, you too!”

He had to do a light jog to catch up with his wife. For a pregnant woman she sure did walk fast.

“Do you know where you’re even going?” He blurted while catching up.

“Med building Wing E, I heard her.” She said matter a factly.

“You forgot to say something to her 18, you have to at least say hello.”

“Sorry, I’m working on it. You know I’m not a people person.”

“It’s ok. Let’s just focus on what’s about to happen.”

The still newlyweds made their way down a series of hallways and walkways until finally they made it to the destination.

“Why does she even have a hospital?” 18 asked.

“I don’t think its a hospital, they just invent test medical equipment. Like the ultrasound she is gonna use on you today.”

“Wow i feel so honored.” She uttered with the utmost of sarcasm.

After they asked one of the many people in scrubs walking around where Bulma was the duo finally found her. Sitting in a room looking at a monitor.

“I see you guys finally made it.” The blue haired woman greeted them while still focusing on her monitor.

“Bulma are you even trained to do this?” 18 asked, the thought never crossed her mind.

“I’m the smartest woman on the planet, and I’ve been prepping for the last two weeks. I’m confident this will go without a hitch!” She said proudly.

“Ok.”

Bulma first weighed Krillin’s wife then started asking her a handful of questions before she got to the main attraction. Some of them professional, like how is she eating, are her feet swelling, is she putting any strain on her body, but most of them personal.

“No I do not have any maternity clothes!” The cyborg said kind of getting annoyed.

“Well after we check on your baby we HAVE to get you some. You’ll thank me later.” She responded.

18 thought about and maybe it would be good to listen to what Bulma was saying and it would be beneficial to get to spend more time with her. After all Bulma was just trying to help and she was friendly and she has been pregnant before. She also will probably pay of all of these clothes she was talking about it.

“Ok, I would like that.”

She actually said yes? Krillin thought to himself.

Wow she actually said yes, I was just fishing there. Bulma wondering the same thought as Krillin.

“Uhh, yea. She didn’t want to waste money on clothes she wouldn’t wear anymore after a year. She’s just been wearing my clothes mostly.” The short man said picking the conversation back up.

“No worries. I’ll pay, my treat.”

“Thank you!” They both said.

“Ok one last question.” The interviewer spoke up.

“Is this one relevant to the situation at hand unlike the last 5 you asked?” The interviewee asked.

“Yes, I swear. I just need to know if you guys are still having sex while this baby is inside of you.”

Krillin’s face heated up so bad it looked like he had a fever and 18 just looked straight pissed.

Bulma continued to speak.

“I’m serious guys, just tell me.”

Krillin decided to speak up about it.

“Uh, we stopped when she found out about the baby, we didn’t want to hurt it in anyway. So that was two months ago probably?”

18 nodded confirming that was the correct answer.

“Alright, well good. See for most people it’s perfectly fine to have intercourse while pregnant. But in your guys’ case I can’t recommend it. Since you guys don’t have normal strength it might injure the baby. But don’t worry. I can speak from personal experience after all the waiting the feeling is amazing. Vegeta and I---”

18 cut her off.

“Ok we get it. I really don’t wanna hear about you and Vegeta’s sex life.”

“All right then. Just lie down and lift up your shirt.”

She took Bulma’s orders.

“Alright this will be a little cold, but nothing you can’t handle. Let me just run one last test to make sure everything will run smoothly.”

It was cold, but in the grand scheme of things it didn’t really matter. She was here realising what was about to happen. She was going to get to see the first glimpse of the life she was raising inside of her.

Krillin could tell she was thinking negative thoughts so he took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“It’s gonna be ok.” He whispered. “You’re strong, you can do this.”

She smiled at him, he always knew just want to say.

Bulma grabbed the transducer probe and placed it where the gel was.

“Just so you guys know for context, the only difference between this machine and one used for regular ultrasounds is that this one detects your android parts and ignores them. This way they won’t interfere with the anything….Speaking of which, here is your baby!”  

It was kind of surreal to the two of them. It was just a blue blob with a black background, but it was filling them with so much emotion. How could they love something they just saw for the first time.  They wanted to protect it, hold it, spoil it, they couldn’t wait for it to be truly alive.

18 had to blink away the tears.

Heh. 18 tried to distract herself so the water didn’t fall from the eyes. If 17 was here he would tell me my human was showing. I would tell him we are more human than machine anyways, might as well embrace it.

“It’s ok to cry hun’” Her husband interrupted her inner thoughts. He could tell she was on the verge.

Bulma did notice what was going on, but she chose to let them have their moment without interfering. It was between them.

“I’m ok now, Bulma tell us we are looking at.” 18 said regaining her composure.

“Well here is the head, the arms, legs, and I’m pretty sure I can make you able to hear its heartbeat. But first want me to tell you want gender it is?”

“Yea that would be great, right babe?” Krillin got excited but then remembered it should be up to his wife.

“Of course.” She said.

“Alright let's see here, it looks like its….a...girl!”

The married couple started to rejoice. To be honest they didn’t care what gender it was, they were just happy to finally know what they were expecting. However their joy subsided once the machine started to make a noise.

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

“Uhh…” Bulma stuttered. She didn’t think that would happen.

“Bulma, what is that.” The ex-monk asked.

Before Bulma could explain what was happening the monitor started flashing warning signs.

Then the craziest thing possible happened. 18’s bloated stomach began to emit light, it started to glow from the inside.

“That doesn’t look right.” The blue haired woman said.

“BULMA WHAT THE FUCK!!!” 18 screamed, fearing for her and her baby’s life.

“BULMA DO SOMETHING!!!” Krillin also screamed, fearing for the same as 18.

“Ok ok, remain calm so I can think.”

Bulma was ineed frazzled and was turned and started to press many buttons on the ultrasound machine. She uninstanctfully dropped the probe on accident. It fell to the floor. Luckily this caused the glowing to stop.

All three of them sighed in almost unicent.

“Bulma what the hell just happened?!?” 18 snapped again.

“Well remember when I said this machine was designed to not detect your inner android parts? It did and when the sound censor in the probe detected it the part started to light up. That is the jist of what happened guys. I can ensure that everything is ok with the baby and with you 18, all the mechanism inside of you did was light up a warning because a sound wave hit it. Some sort of defense protocol, and the only reason it glowed at all is because of your bigger stomach area.”

“Ok, thank Kami.” Said Krillin.

“Sorry guys…” Bulma sounded defeated.

“If we are both fine then don’t sweat about it. It was just a scary experience that’s all. It’s kind of fitting though, sometimes, now that Krillin is with me i forgot I’m part machine. But I won’t forget it anytime soon.” 18 spoke up.

Krillin leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Bulma that was very sweet but still felt incredibly embarrassed.

“I’m gonna fix this now and get it over with for next time, how about you guys go get some lunch from my mom in the meantime. Then after I’ll take you to go get some maternity clothes.” The bluenette pleaded sounding very guilty.

“Alright, let’s go Krillin. Thanks Bulma.” 18 said

“I swear it’s nothing to worry about, and congrats again guys.” She said. “I’ll come find you two in an hour.”

******************

Krillin went to go get some sandwiches that Panchi made and met his wife outside.

“Man that was crazy.” Krillin said sitting down next to the love of his life.

“I’m just happy everything is ok. I can’t blame her though, she couldn’t of known.” 18 said.

“Hopefully the next visit will go smoother. How scared were you?”

“I thought someone had wished the bomb back in me and...I don’t want to even think about it.”

“Oh 18 that is awful.”

“Yeah I know. What was going through your mind?”

“At first it was about losing the baby. But now all I can think about is how your stomach looked like it had a really big firefly in it.” Krillin chuckled scratching the back of his head.

She smacked his forehead.

“OWW, guess I deserved that.”

“You did.”

“I kind of like that as a nickname for the baby. Firefly!”

“Hmm, yea It’s kinda cute.”

That’s it

Thanks for reading, k18 for life. Thanks to @chestnutisland for running chestnutfest. Was writing this in advance but saw you had a free day planned so i decided to submit it for that.

[mychemicalmenopause]

Whoops, I meant to update the other day when I heard from Dr. Williams after speaking with Dr. Lipscomb. He started off the conversation by saying, “So, what’s this I hear about the front desk and a Google review?” The way he said it was more annoyed than intimidating, like he had gotten in trouble and he had absolutely no idea why. I told him that I had left several messages for him, his staff, and the Regional Manager and I hadn’t heard back from anyone. He told me that the front desk was trying to “cover” for Karie by not delivering my messages, when they “really did need a push” to get things done. As a former receptionist, it really makes me wonder if that’s what actually happened, or if they used the front desk as a scapegoat for Karie. Either way, shame on them. 

Dr. Williams repeated what Dr. Lipscomb said earlier in the day, “We can do better,” and asked if I was willing to continue treatment as planned. I told him that I’m nervous about not being able to get questions answered in a timely manner when I do start meds, especially now that I’ve gotten Karie in even more trouble, unintentionally. He said, “Well, everyone in the office knows who you are now, but if you need anything, just send a message through MyChart instead of calling in.” I told him that I tried that the first time I had questions and it took eight days just to get an acknowledgement. He apologized for that and tried his best to assure me that it won’t happen again. He promised that the Lupron had definitely been called into the pharmacy and that they should just be waiting on my insurance to authorize it. I told him I had talked to them earlier in the day and they said to call back on Friday if I hadn’t heard anything. 

I talked to my therapist on Thursday and told her that I still felt very unsettled about the whole thing. I felt a little guilty that the apparent “big boss” doctor had to get involved and that everyone got in trouble, but damn - do your job and give a shit about your patients and maybe that won’t happen again. I did apologize and told Dr. Williams that I didn’t mean to be a bitch or a difficult patient, that I wasn’t being hostile when I called and have been kind to everyone I’ve spoken with. Ariel (my therapist) told me not to feel guilty for advocating for myself, but I still did. She asked if I was comfortable moving forward with Dr. Williams and I said I wasn’t sure, so she advised me to continue as planned. I value her opinion and advice, so that’s what we’re doing.  

This morning I got a message from Karie saying my insurance had denied coverage for Lupron. “Their letter stated that approval requires the diagnosis is confirmed by surgical or direct visualization or histopathological confirmation in the past 10 yrs.” Because we’re doing things a little backwards, it would not benefit me to have surgery to diagnose Endometriosis and then go back in, in 6 months to take everything out. So Dr. Williams filed an appeal explaining why he’s wanting to prescribe Lupron and we’ll see what happens. 

I’m just flabbergasted as to why my insurance would approve a total hysterectomy (around $50,000), but not a medication. Why do insurance companies have the right to override a doctor’s prescription? Who the hell are these people to say yes to SURGERIES but not meds? It’s absurd and mind-blowing and fucking exhausting. Not one single thing has been easy with this and I just want the surgery already.  

_______________________________________________

PMDD is so freaking weird, man. Today was a typical Monday - didn’t get enough sleep last night, got an extra visit added to my schedule, had to run errands, introduce a sitter to a dog, and did an interview. For the last 2.5 - 3 weeks I’ve felt like shit, but I’m not in a bad mood today. So much so that it caught me off guard a little until I was like, ‘This is what you’re supposed to feel like,’ bit of a headache from the day but overall OKAY. 

[mldrgrl]

Not Again

by: mldrgrl Rating: PG-13 Summary: See chapter 1

Chapter 2, Day 2:

Mulder hasn’t slept, hasn’t eaten, hasn’t showered or shaved.  He waits for a phone call from the gunmen that hasn’t come and he stares blankly at maps and profiles of fourteen missing people.  Inside his mind, he’s frantically searching for Scully, trying desperately to come up with something, anything that could help find her.  He also knows, deep down, that this is going to be a long, torturous waiting game, one that could last weeks, months, years, or forever.  And this isn’t like two years ago, or five years ago.  The deputy director would like nothing more than to toss Mulder out on his ass.  If he doesn’t toe the line, the resources afforded to him in the FBI will be gone.

Agent Doggett has been demanding an interview with Mulder, and Mulder can’t refuse, and he’s afraid his temper will get the better of him.  The guy rubs him in too much of the wrong way not to get worked up over.  To Mulder’s surprise, a woman comes in instead, with dark hair and the perpetual hint of a smile.  Where Doggett was too aggressive, she is too relaxed.

“Agent Mulder,” she says congenially.  “It's nice to meet you.  I'm Agent Reyes.”

“Where’s Agent Doggett?” he asks.

“We thought it might be better if I spoke to you instead.”  She sits across from him.  She doesn't carry a notepad or a file with her.  She looks like she's here for tea and conversation, not an interrogation.  “I've been assigned to the task force to find the missing fourteen.”

“Good luck.”

“I’m sorry about your partner.”

He wants to answer her politeness with sarcasm, but he hears Skinner in the back of his head telling him to play nice if he wants any hope of being allowed in on the investigation.  The sooner they could clear him of any wrongdoing or negligence, the sooner he could do something substantive.

“I appreciate that,” he says.  “Sorry won't help me find her though.”

“What will?”

“What's your specialty, Agent Reyes?  What do you know about alien abduction?”

“Not much.  I work in the ritualistic crime division in New Orleans.”

Mulder pauses and thinks for a moment.  “Monica Reyes?”

“Yes.”

“You worked the Lafontaine murders last year.”

“I did.”

“I wanted that case.  Submitted a requisition for it, but got denied.  Kersh had us working shit detail at that time.”

“Why would you have wanted that case?  It was horrible.”

“It bore a striking similarity to a mass murder in 1979.”

It's Reyes’ turn to pause and she tilts her head slightly.  “Were you my anonymous tip with the news article from The Times-Picayune?”

“Anonymous tips are meant to be anonymous for a reason.  I read your report.  You didn't find a connection.”

“No, I didn't.”

“I didn't kill my partner.  So ask me what you think you need to know so I can get out of here.”

“You and Agent Scully were close?”

“Yes, we are close.”

“Right.”

“To pick up where Agent Doggett left off, yes, we’re more than just partners, though that's been a more recent development in our relationship.”

“How recent?”

“About four months recent.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why did you decide to become intimate with your partner?”

“It wasn't so much of a decision as...it just happened.”  

Mulder sits back and closes his eyes.  He thinks about the first night they spent together, when he put his arm around her as they watched a movie, when she looked up at him with surprise, but smiled.  When he’d let his thumb graze her arm past her short sleeved top.  When she’d shifted closer and cautiously rested her hand on his thigh.  When she'd looked at his mouth and he had to know what it would be like to kiss her.  No, it hadn’t been a decision, it had been a compulsion.

“I'm sorry if this is uncomfortable or embarrassing for you.”

“If?”  Mulder gives a little snort.  “People have talked about me behind my back for years.  I'm not worried about what anyone says or thinks about me, it's what they might say about Scully that bothers me.”

“I'm told she's a good agent.”

“The best.”  A headache that Mulder has been fighting starts to pulse behind his eyes and he pinches the top of his nose before rubbing his brows.  “I have medical records I'm supposed to give you.  Of our attempts to have a baby, and her infertility.  I didn't know she was pregnant until yesterday.  I'm not even quite sure I believe it, but I would never, ever hurt her.”

“If you were trying to have a baby, why didn't she tell you she was pregnant before you went to Bellefleur?”

“I can only imagine it was because she knew I wouldn't let her come.”

“Wouldn't let her?”

Mulder puts his hand down and looks Agent Reyes in the eyes.  She looks at him neutrally, but he has the feeling she thinks she's caught him in an admission of guilt.   He tried not to clench his jaw, but it's hard not to.

“I had a bad feeling about coming back,” he says.  “I tried to talk her out of going, but she insisted.  If she had told me about the baby, I would’ve tried a lot harder.”

“What would you have done?”

“Not come at all, probably.”

“You would stay behind and not chase a lead?”

“For her I would.”

“That's not what I've heard about you.”

Mulder swallows.  The even tone in Reyes’ voice is unsettling.  She has a way of stating things without malice or surprise, but the judgment is still there in what she says.  He was wrong about her being too relaxed.  Perhaps she's even more calculating than Agent Doggett.

“Let’s just say I haven’t felt the need to go haring off on my own lately.”

“But, she has, hasn’t she?  Wasn’t it just a few months ago that she followed the lead in an investigation without telling you where she was going or that she was with a man you’ve described as an enemy of the government.”

“Jesus, how did you even-”

“And you said you’ve only been together intimately for four months.  Was she running out on you then, or was this before you were together?  Did she run off on you now?”

Mulder can’t take it anymore.  He stands up and slaps both hands down on the table, but Agent Reyes doesn’t flinch.  “This is insane,” he shouts.

“No, fourteen people vanishing without a trace is insane, Agent Mulder.”

“Not if you’ve seen what I’ve seen.”

“According to you, you didn’t see anything more than a bright light in the sky.”

Mulder scrubs his face with both hands, frustrated and tense.  He pushes his hands back through his hair and tightens his grip as he turns away from Agent Reyes and paces the room.

“I’m here to help you, Agent Mulder,” Agent Reyes says.

“Help me?”  Mulder turns towards her and shakes his head.  “You can’t help me if you don’t believe me.”

“I never said I didn’t believe you.”

The door opens and Agent Doggett enters, followed by Skinner.  Agent Reyes stands and pushes her chair back into place under the table.

“You’re gonna accompany the task force to Arizona,” Doggett says.

Mulder cuts his eyes to Skinner, whose face reveals nothing.  “What’s in Arizona?” he asks.

“Boy by the name of Gibson Praise,” Agent Doggett answers.

“What do you want with Gibson?”

“I don’t know,” Doggett says, holding a red file up in his hand.  “But, someone wants us to find him.”

*****

The sun is still high when the caravan of black SUVs stops in front of the tiny desert boarding school for the deaf.  The air is hot and thick with the dust the cars have kicked up.  Mulder wipes a gritty sheen of sweat off the back of his neck.  He hasn’t had a chance to be alone with Skinner, to find out what this is about.  He still hasn’t heard back from the gunmen.  He’s flying blind in this situation and he feels like he needs to proceed with the utmost caution.

Agent Doggett is on one side of Mulder, Agent Reyes the other, like a police escort.  Mulder thinks they may as well just put him in handcuffs.  He feels like they’d like to.  There are at least ten other agents in the task force behind them, buzzing with adrenaline and excitement, like invading a school for deaf kids is going to be the high point of their careers.  He wonders if any of them has ever been out of the bullpen.  It wouldn’t surprise them if they hadn’t.  Kersh likes to keep his agents on a tight leash.

“I thought we were only here to talk to him,” Mulder says to Doggett, glancing back over his shoulder at the team behind them.

“They’re not here for the boy,” Doggett answers, eyes forward.  His face glistens in the heat.

Mulder takes another look back.  It becomes clear to him then.  They’re there to make sure he doesn’t get away.  He searches for Skinner amongst them, and then sees his boss standing alone and apart from the group, his cell phone pressed to one ear and a hand over the other.  It looks like he’s shouting something, but there’s a strong desert wind blowing that carries his voice away.

“Wait,” Mulder says, stopping and turning fully to watch Skinner.  “Something’s wrong.”

“What is it?” Agent Reyes asks.

Mulder takes a step away from the two agents and squints out at the desert.  There’s a glimmer of something in the distance, but he’s distracted when Skinner pockets his phone and starts briskly for them, his face red and wet, tie billowing over his shoulder in the wind.

“Someone breached the FBI database overnight using Agent Scully’s credentials,” Skinner says.

“What were they looking for?” Mulder asks.

“Files on Gibson Praise.”

Mulder turns to go back to the school, but Skinner stops him.  “There’s something else,” he says.

“What?”

“I heard from your...friends…”  Skinner pauses and glances at Agent Doggett and then back at Mulder.  “They say they’re getting reports of activity in Clifton.”

“Clifton?  How far is that from where we are?”

“Thirty miles, maybe.”

“We need to find Gibson.  Now.”

With Agents Doggett and Reyes hot on his heels, Mulder rushes towards the entrance of the school and throws open the door.  There’s a receptionist at the front desk that looks up with puzzlement, but it’s clear she can’t hear the commotion that follows him.  He starts yelling Gibson’s name, trusting that at least Doggett or Reyes has flashed a badge by now to someone, and searches the school room by room.

“He’s not here,” Mulder says to the agents that trail after him.  “He knew what was coming.”

“Where could he go?” Agent Reyes asks.

Mulder shakes his head and pushes open the back exit.  He squints out at the desert again and then looks down at the ground.  There are footprints in the dirt, two sets of shoes, tennis shoes and what looks like high-heeled boots.  The imprints are clean at first, even steps out towards the open desert, but they soon grow messier and more chaotic.  Mulder follows the tracks, slowly at first, and then picking up speed.

“Agent Mulder!”  Agent Doggett calls after him.

Mulder doesn’t stop.  He runs alongside the fading footprints and doesn’t have to look back to know Agent Doggett is behind him.  Through the desert brush and tumbleweeds, he spots something in the distance, taking shape the closer he gets.  He sees what looks like Scully, dragging a stumbling Gibson Praise behind her, marching defiantly towards the edge of a cliff.  Agent Doggett must see what he sees at the same time, because he calls her name.

“Agent Scully!”

Scully doesn’t slow or stop or acknowledge Agent Doggett’s call to her.  Gibson is resisting her pull as best he can, but she’s relentless in her hold.  Mulder stops in his tracks about twenty feet away and puts an arm out to stop Agent Doggett as well.  He didn’t notice Agent Reyes behind them, who skids to a stop on the other side of Mulder.

“Agent Scully, stop right there!”  Agent Doggett shouts.

Scully finally pauses and looks towards them.  There’s something cold and dead in her eyes.  She’s unmoved by the boy struggling in her grip and her hold on him is effortless.  She blinks slowly as though she’s studying the three agents.  Mulder can hear Gibson wheezing, trying to say something.

“Sssnoter,” Gibson croaks, staring at Mulder with wide, fearful eyes.

“Sssnoter,” Mulder murmurs to himself, repeating it and forming the shape of the words with his mouth.  “Sssnoter.  Snot ter.  Snot her.  It’s not her!  It’s not her!”

Instinctually, Mulder moves his hand to his hip to reach for his weapon, only remembering that his gun was taken from him by Skinner before they left Oregon.  Agent Doggett, following Mulder’s lead, draws his weapon and Agent Reyes follows.

“Let him go!” Mulder yells.

“Hands in the air,” Agent Doggett orders.

The Scully imposter still looks unmoved, but she releases Gibson, who falls to his knees and starts to crawl away.  Agent Reyes breaks away from Mulder and Agent Doggett, her gun still pointed at Scully, and steps to the side to where Gibson is crawling.

“I’m not gonna ask you again, put your hands in the air!”  Agent Doggett takes aim, ready to fire.

“Don’t shoot unless you can hit the base of the neck,” Mulder says to him.

“What?”

Agent Reyes has knelt to pull Gibson out of harm’s way and Mulder moves behind Agent Doggett as he stalks forward.  The Scully imposter cocks her head to the side and then almost with a shrug, turns and steps off the edge of the cliff.

“No!”  Mulder screams, knowing full well it isn’t Scully who’s just fallen, but it looks like her, and he knows it’s an image he’ll never be able to shake.  He stands rooted to his spot while Agent Doggett runs to the drop site and peers over the edge.

There’s the sound of activity surrounding him, of Skinner rushing past to join Agent Doggett, of members of the task force trying to help Agent Reyes with Gibson, of Agent Doggett shouting orders to people, but it all blends into a cacophony.  It’s Skinner that breaks the spell by pulling Mulder to the side and asking him what happened.

“It was a bounty hunter,” Mulder says.  “They’re after Gibson.”

“Why?” Skinner asks.

“I don’t know.  He needs protection.”

“He needs a hospital.  They think his leg might be broken.”

“Someone’s got to stay with him.”

“Are you asking me?”

“You’re the only one with any idea of what we’re dealing with here.”  Mulder looks towards Agent Doggett, who’s organizing a team to head down into the canyon and retrieve the body of the Scully imposter.  “I don’t trust anyone else at the moment.”

“What will you do?”

“Keep searching.”

Skinner looks away, contemplative.  He finally nods once, but doesn’t say anything to Mulder before he walks away.  Mulder watches as he lifts Gibson into his arms and orders another agent to get to one of the SUVs to go to the hospital.  No one but Agent Reyes notices when Mulder heads further out into the desert.

*****

Mulder has been walking for over an hour.  He’s been feeling lethargic for awhile, his throat is dry and he has a headache.  He hears Scully in his head, can’t even leave you for a day, Mulder, and you’ve gotten yourself dehydrated.  He stops and hunches over, his hands on his knees.  The sun has gotten low and the air has cooled somewhat, but he’s still hot all over.  Dirty sweat has dried on his skin, making him itch.

Even in the middle of the desert, he has the feeling of being watched.  Several times, he’s paused to search all sides of the vast landscape, but it’s hard to see through the brush and cactus.  He’s completely alone save for the few lizards he’s passed, a low-flying vulture, and a scorpion he nearly stepped on from not being attentive enough.  It only now starts to occur to him that he could die out here and no one would know.  He wonders if there’s anyone left to care at this point.

He hears a noise he can’t identify close by and he goes still, immediately fearing a snake of some kind.  When he finally dares to glance over, he’s more relieved than he cares to let on seeing Agent Reyes approaching.  He straightens and sways a little on his feet.

“Have you been following me?” Mulder asks.  He notices a canteen at Agent Reyes’ hip and unconsciously lips his chapped lips.

“Water?” she asks.

“Please.”

Agent Reyes pulls the strap holding the canteen over her head and hands it to Mulder.  His grip is almost too weak to unscrew the cap and he fights the urge to gulp at the water.  Slowly, Scully’s voice reminds him.  Small sips, Mulder.

“I grew up in New Mexico,” she says.  “Most parents probably tell their kids never to talk to strangers.  Mine told me never to go into the desert alone.”

He coughs on a sip of water and screws the cap back on the canteen before he hands it back to her.  “Yeah, well…”

“What exactly are we looking for?”

“Aircraft.  A force field.”  He shrugs.  “You don’t really find it, it finds you.”

“What happened back there on the cliff?”

“That wasn’t Scully.”

“Then who was it?”

“Not who.  It.”

“It looked like Agent Scully.”

“It can look like whoever it wants.”  

Mulder turns away from Agent Reyes and looks out into the grey nothingness.  There’s an orange glow behind the mountains in the distance.  It will be pitch black soon.  He wasn’t thinking earlier.

“Agent Mulder?”  Agent Reyes asks.  “If that wasn’t Agent Scully, who was it?”

“An alien.”

“How did you know?”

Mulder hesitates.  He isn’t sure of how much he should tell Agent Reyes.  He doesn’t know that he can trust her, but there doesn’t seem to be much of a point in being discreet now.  Keeping quiet certainly won’t bring Scully back.

“Gibson Praise is part alien,” he says.  “At least, that’s what I think.  He knows what they’re thinking.  He knows what all of us are thinking, actually.  We should head back.  It’s getting dark.”

Agent Reyes cups her hand at Mulder’s elbow when he walks one way and pulls him in a slightly different direction without comment.  He follows her, sensing that her confidence comes from experience.  When it starts to get darker, she pulls a flashlight out from her pocket and points it at the ground in front of their feet.  After some time of silence, she speaks.

“I first met Agent Doggett about eight years ago,” she says.  He was NYPD at the time.  Did you know that?”

“I don't know anything about Agent Doggett,” he answers.

“He was a suspect at one point for the murder of his son.”

“That's...that's awful.”

“Yes.  Luke was seven.  Agent Doggett was cleared very early on.  I was in the New York City field office at the time and I was on the investigation.”

“What happened?”

“Stranger abduction, we think.  Never made an arrest.”

Mulder quietly contemplates this bit of information.  He wonders what Agent Doggett was like as a cop.  He wonders if that incident in his life propelled him into joining the FBI.  If Agent Doggett was also there for a personal cause.

“I only tell you this so that you'll know that Agent Doggett is on your side,” she says.  “He’s been in your shoes.”

“Scully isn’t dead.”

“It’s about loss, Agent Mulder.  He knows what it’s like.  And I think he must have felt a particular way about this case to call me in on it.  He doesn’t keep in touch.  I’m sure I remind him of Luke, and why we met.  He will call though, if he needs the help.  He’s here to help.”

“Like I told you before, you can’t help me if you don’t believe me.”

“And like I told you, I never said I didn’t.”

“Wait,” Mulder whispers, putting his arm out and catching Agent Reyes’ wrist to stop her.  “Do you see that?”

In the sky up ahead is a light, slowly moving closer, growing larger.  He thought at first it might be a shooting star, but it’s not falling across the sky, it’s heading towards them.

“I see it,” Agent Reyes says.  “What is it?”

“I’m not sure.”  

Mulder steps ahead and holds his arm up over his head to block the light from his eyes.  His heart pounds with hopeful anticipation, but it soon becomes apparent what’s approaching them is a helicopter.  He deflates a little and drops his arm as he turns to Agent Reyes.  There’s a look of deep sympathy in her eyes when he looks at her.

The helicopter descends and Agent Doggett hops out, beckoning to the two of them.  Agent Reyes comes forward and pauses next to Mulder.  She doesn’t say anything, let’s him make the decision to cooperate and follow her, which he does.  She gets into the helicopter and he pulls himself inside as well, Agent Doggett behind them both.

“We didn’t recover a body from the bottom of the canyon,” Agent Doggett shouts over the noise of the helicopter.  “And we haven’t been able to reach AD Skinner.”

“When was the last time you spoke to him?” Mulder asks.

“As he was putting the boy in the SUV.  I’ve got men searching the hospital now, but they can’t find him.”

“Can we land there?”

“Guess we’ll find out.”

*****

The hospital seems to be even smaller than the school, and equally as quiet.  The only staff is a doctor and a night nurse and a janitor.  One of the task force agents meets the helicopter as it lands on the highway and drives them across the main road to the building.  Agent Shaffer, who drove Skinner and Gibson to the hospital, is posted outside of Gibson’s room on watch.

“Sir,” Agent Shaffer says to Agent Doggett as the trio approaches Gibson’s room.

“You were the last to see AD Skinner?”  Agent Doggett asks him.

“I entered the hospital with AD Skinner and the boy,” he confirms.  “AD Skinner hasn’t been seen since leaving this room to take a phone call approximately half an hour ago.”

“Any idea who that phone call was from?”  Agent Doggett asks.

“No, Sir.”

“He wouldn’t leave,” Mulder says.  “He’s still here.”

“So, we’ll do another search,” Agent Reyes says.

“I want to talk to Gibson,” Mulder says.

Agent Doggett seems to mull the request over, his piercing blue eyes staring hard at Mulder.  He finally nods once and turns to Agent Shaffer.  “No one enters or leaves this room,” he says, glancing at Mulder.  “You got that?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Monica, you’ll search with me.”

Mulder slips into Gibson’s room and watches through the small window beside the door as Agents Doggett and Reyes head down the hall.  Agent Shaffer blocks the door with his body and assumes a crossed-arm pose.  Mulder rolls his eyes a little as he turns around.  Gibson is lying in a hospital bed that makes him look even smaller than he is, his leg propped up in a fresh white cast, eyes closed.

“Gibson?” Mulder says, moving closer to the hospital bed.  He can tell the boy isn’t sleeping, but feigning.

Gibson opens his eyes.  “I don’t know where Agent Scully is,” he says.

“I wasn’t...nevermind, you’d know I’m lying.”

“I know they have her.  But, I don’t know where.”

“Do you know if she’s close?”

“I’m sorry Agent Mulder, I can’t tell you anything.”

“Can you tell me what they want with you?”

“They want what anyone wants, to study me, keep me like a lab rat, cut me open, kill me if they have to.”

“Gibson, no one wants...you’re not a lab rat.”

“Sure.  The only reason you’re in here is because she’s gone.”

“Yes, I want to find Agent Scully, but I want to protect you too, Gibson.”

“You know, insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

“I’m certifiable, Gibson.”

Gibson snorts, but it isn’t with humor, it’s with derision.  He shakes his head a little and looks away.  Mulder pulls a plastic chair over to the side of the bed and sits down.  He’s starting to feel the effects of the lack of sleep, food, and water on his body.  He still has the headache that started in the desert and now his bloodshot eyes are starting to feel dry and irritated.

Suddenly, Gibson turns his head again, sharply, like he was startled by a noise.  He sits up and Mulder straightens, turning his head in the direction Gibson is staring.  The boy is listening to something, Mulder’s sure of it.

“What is it?” Mulder asks.

“It’s coming,” Gibson answers.

Mulder looks around the room for a place to hide.  The window is too small to climb out of.  The cupboards next to the bed are too narrow.  It’s too late anyway, the door opens and Skinner walks in.  Behind him, Mulder sees Agent Shaffer, slumped on the floor.  He pulls Gibson from the bed and stands in front of him, backing up slowly as Gibson hobbles behind him on his cast.

“Agent Doggett!”  Mulder yells.  “Agent Reyes!”

The thing that’s posing as Skinner moves slowly, but purposefully towards Mulder.  Mulder stands his ground and blocks the thing from reaching Gibson.  The imposter reaches out and grabs Mulder by the throat.  Mulder scratches ineffectually at the hand choking him.

“Stop,” Mulder wheezes, just before he’s lifted into the air by his neck and tossed to the side.  He hits his head and his shoulder.  There’s an explosion of pain throughout his entire body.  He manages to stand, though his knees are shaking and he’s seeing double.

“What the hell is this?” Agent Doggett shouts, rushing into the room with his gun drawn.  “Get away from the boy!”

“Base of the neck,” Mulder croaks, losing his balance and stumbling against the cupboards.  

It’s Agent Reyes that fires, her aim remarkably accurate.  The bullet hole oozes a sizzling green sludge.  The body falls and moments later, begins to liquify.  Agent Doggett stands perplexed, a look of shock and horror on his face.  Gibson is huddled against the wall, inching away to escape the toxic blood that pools closer to his feet.

“John, the boy,” Agent Reyes says.

Doggett holsters his weapon and rushes over to Gibson, stepping over the liquid corpse to escort the boy to a safer place.  Agent Reyes goes to Mulder, who has lost the ability to stand and has slumped against the side of the bed.

“It can look like whoever it wants to,” she says.  “Isn’t that what you said?”

Mulder nods and his throat tightens with a surge of nausea.  

“We just found AD Skinner in a storage closet,” she continues.  “He was unconscious, but alive.”

Mulder coughs and retches bile.

“We need a medic in here!” she shouts.

Mulder loses consciousness.

*****