#i could wear a dress and tights. i have this long beige dress that’s more elegant than i’m making it sound right now

[fingertipsmp3]

Guys I have a job interview at a law office and I don’t have a single fucking thing to wear

[becauseicantthinkwritings]

Objects in Motion

Part 3

Alpha! Billy Russo x Omega! Reader

Hey, I hit 4k followers! That's pretty cool, thank you everyone!

Part 1 // Part 2

A snip taken from Le Printemps, by Eugène Bidau

.

It takes you too long to pick a dress the next morning. There was an issue with all of them, one was too tight around your chest that you could barely breathe, the other had a hole in the sleeve that you hadn’t noticed before.

You'd ended up picking something you hadn't worn in a while- sage green with little flowers on it. 

Halfway to the museum, you'd noticed a small stain on the skirt, that had made you frown.

It wouldn't lift with the wet wipe you'd pulled from your bag, and you'd have to settle for hoping he wouldn't see it.

Your stomach flips at the thought of him.

You'd worn a dress in hopes that this was a date- you didn't understand why you wanted it to be a date so badly.

Okay, that wasn't true, you knew you liked him, even though you shouldn't.

It probably wasn't a date, why would he be interested in dating you?

I haven't had a clear thought since, he'd said, you knew the sentiment, wondering, if he was just like every other Alpha, nice at first and then demanding later.

The other Alphas you'd been with- you try not to shudder- they'd been awful, love bombing until you let your guard down, and then getting angry when you tried to deny them something.

The last one had gotten upset that after only knowing him for two weeks, you didn't want to share your heat with him. 

The scorn he'd shown you when you reinforced your denial instead of caving, it had made you curl up and never want to see another Alpha again.

This Alpha could be worse, he could be cruel, waiting to get you alone to trick you into something you didn't want because you'd stolen his coat. The thought sent an uncomfortable wave of nausea over you.

You see your seedy reflection in the window, everything moving too fast for you to focus on except your own gaze.

You would not be taken advantage of.

.

There’s that too much feeling again, everyone is so busy around you as you stand outside the art museum waiting. You see children running past, and dogs, a delighted scream in the distance that makes your chest feel like it’s on fire with the too much of it all. 

Why did the world have to be so chaotic? Why couldn’t it be warm and quiet and peaceful with hints of cracked pepper and bergamot-

You blink, realising you’d been thinking about the Alpha again.

Maybe this hadn’t been a good idea. To get involved with someone that made you feel this way, like you wanted to give in to his demands. At which point would he ask for too much?

Your shoulders drop, you check the time, quarter to twelve.

You turn to leave.

Someone says your name.

You raise your head to find the Alpha approaching. He’s wearing a beige shirt, with large threads that look almost knitted, paired with black pants and another coat that definitely costs more than you can afford. 

Too late, your stomach twists.

You nod your head in greeting.

“Hi,” You acknowledge shyly, “You’re early.”

“Hello, I thought I told you to call me when you got here?”

Your chest squeezes in fright. Was he already making demands?

You keep his gaze, trying to show him a braver you than you were.

“I only just got here.” You challenge, wondering why it was such a big deal.

He nods, raising a hand to push his hair back. You watch him scan the area before letting out a soft breath.

“Sorry, I just didn’t like the idea of you waiting all alone here.”

Was he worried about you?

“I can manage,” You inform him, “I come here all the time.”

He studies you for a moment, looks as though he wants to say something, but decides against it.

“My apologies,” He turns to stand beside you, “Shall we?”

Your stomach flips at his words and you try not to focus on it, or him, and definitely not his smell.

You begin walking.

You try not to touch him, keeping a respectful distance, not wanting to take any part of him he might not be willing to give.

As you walk through the museum’s outdoor park, a lot of people glance your way. Men and women alike, want to steal a look at the man standing beside you. It makes you feel incredibly conscious of yourself, and you feel like the stain on your skirt grows ten times its size in that time.

You wonder if any of their staring has to do with the assumption that you were a mated pair- the thought makes you shiver- the idea that you would be mated to a person that looks like him.

“Cold? Want my coat?” He offers.

You shake your head, not wanting to touch this Alpha’s coats ever again.

“I’m alright, I’m overheating anyway.” You reply, hoping he didn’t ask any follow up questions. Your period would be upon you soon.

“Poor thing.” He soothes.

It almost makes you stumble.

Your eyes widen and you feel a sharp pang in your stomach, his easy comfort swirling in your hindbrain, begging you to curl up with this man in a cozy nest- not a man, you correct yourself, an Alpha.

You’d only walked a few minutes beside him and already you were thinking about bringing him into your nest? Had you gone insane?

You refuse to think about it, focusing on the trees, and the people passing by with dogs on harnesses leading the way-

“Did you grow up in New York?” He asks, his voice breaking into the whirlwind in your head.

You swallow, shaking your head before looking over at him.

Damn- looking at him was a mistake.

You tell him where you grew up on a shaky breath, asking him to reciprocate.

He smiles, calmly responds that he grew up here, bounced around the city a bit. Something about his response, the tone of his voice, tells you that there’s a key part of the story missing.

You don’t pry, knowing better than to ask intrusive questions.

You swallow, smiling at him politely when he looks at you, still trapped in the moment when he offered you his coat.

You catch a group of women with their eyes on William, and when their gaze falls on you, you watch their collective expressions switch from interest to disdain.

You drop your head, finding that maybe the floor is safer to gaze at than your environment.

What were you doing here with him? Why had you done this? You should have just stayed home where you were safer.

“What do you do for work?” He asks next, breaking into the din in your head. 

You turn to look at him with wide eyes, unsure as to why he was so interested in you.

“Uh- I’m- I work in customer service… somehow. I have no idea how I ended up there.”

“What do you mean?” He asks, the tone of his voice sounds genuinely curious.

You glance his way, giving him a smile.

“I’m not exactly a person that’s comfortable around people. I like… being alone.”

“You don’t like it?”

“Not really, but it’s better than nothing.” You let out a breath, “Can’t complain.” You finish with a mutter.

“Something else you want to do?”

You shake your head sadly. You couldn’t very well say that you’d rather not work at all- it would look like you were after his money.

You think for a moment, trying to make something up, and falling short.

“Honestly, I don’t know, I guess I haven’t found my calling yet.”

He nods in understanding, and it gives you the opportunity to ask about his line of work.

“What about you? What do you do?”

“I'm in security,” he answers, “I handle asset and individual protection, and I even get contracted by the government occasionally.”

You listen intently, nodding along to his words. You'd already looked him up and had some idea of what he did, but it was interesting to hear it from him.

“That sounds really cool. Is there a lot of danger?”

He grins, and abjectly, you feel as though you've asked something stupid.

“It can get dicey sometimes, yeah, especially with protecting people.”

“Right, yeah, sorry, dumb question.” You mutter, looking down.

“I like your questions.” He says lowly, angling his head in your direction so that you hear him.

Like a fledgling omega, your heart skips a damn beat.

His eyes are very dark, you try not to trip as you get caught up in them, pools of obsidian, pulling you into him.

He gazes right back, the soft look in his eyes fills your head with delight, makes you forget about breathing for a few moments.

It's something so primal inside of you, a whisper in your head that this… this alpha, might be special. 

You breathe out a short sigh, inching closer, until you're close enough to breathe him in. You close your eyes, taking a deep, slow breath, bergamot and citrus chasing your anxieties away.

You lean in more, hindbrain in control, desperate for more of his scent, his hand is rough on the back of your neck. 

Your nose almost brushes the scent gland on the side of his neck when someone walking past clears their throat loudly.

You jerk, pulling back, brain restarting as absolute horror fills you.

No way did you almost scent a stranger in a public place.

You make a sound of regret, stepping back, his hand slips from your neck, you glance up at him, the scent of desire heavy in the air.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry.” You vocalise, turning away for a second to catch your breath and calm yourself.

“I wasn't stopping you.” He admits, as you continue to breathe.

This was too much, he had too much of an influence on you. His words make your stomach flip.

It was a very good thing, you decided, that you'd chosen a public place. You couldn’t even begin to imagine what would have happened if you'd been alone. You weren't sure if you had the capacity to stop yourself around him.

He had the hidden ability to somehow switch your brain from rationality to instinct. And that, was the most dangerous thing of all.

“I'm sorry,” you say again, trying not to cry from how overwhelming it is to resist him, “If you- if you want to leave I'll understand.”

“Not at all, omega.” He replies almost instantly, “I want this, don't be sorry.” He reaches out to take your hand in his, giving you a reassuring squeeze.

“Come on.” He guides, taking a step forward to prompt you into walking again.

He doesn't let go of your hand.

.

The sandwich shop has an old feel to it, sitting at the center of the park with lots of seating both indoors and out for dining, the little building looks like it was built at least a decade or two ago. The roof is partially made of glass to allow natural light to spill in, blocked by trees all around except in the direct centre where a large amount of light spills in.

When Billy asks to be seated in the coolest spot, you turn to look at him in surprise, your stomach twisting, heart accelerating as you take in his casual dominance of his environment.

Like other Alphas, he knew how to command a room, though, with him, the assertion was more subtext. He was polite, and yet he always seemed to get what he wanted. It was a dangerous mix, and the implications of what that meant for you scared you a little.

“Is here okay?” He asks, turning to you when the woman at the front guides you to a table.

You blink in surprise. No one had ever-

You study the booth with a little frown, finding it a little too bright for your senses and then your eyes drift two tables down to a darker booth before looking back at him shyly.

“That one?” He asks, already moving.

“Yes please.” You say nicely, following him.

It's nice, you never sit in the booths because it's usually just you when you come here, but the seats are soft, and you can tell the velvety upholstery is clean and has recently been redone.

He slides into the seat opposite to you, his knees bumping yours for a second as he gets settled.

You giggle when they bump you again and he mutters an apology.

“Sorry, it's a little small,” you say, “And you're kind of… not.”

He laughs quietly.

“I'm okay, getting in was the hardest part, and it's not too bad.” You feel his legs extend out on either side of yours, taking up space to get comfortable. 

You can feel your heart beating forcefully as you watch him scan the little paper menu that had been placed on the table before you'd been seated. Finding difficulty in figuring out why exactly he'd taken an interest in you.

“S-so,” you murmur, getting his attention, “You didn't have the coat cleaned?”

His eyes darken, a smile pulling on his lips as he recounts the memory in his head.

“I was curious. I'd deleted the video of you taking it- didn't want to cause unnecessary trouble for you- plus I know that omegas occasionally do things on instinct- so when I got it back, wrapped so tightly, I was… just wondering about you a little.”

You swallow nervously.

“And then?”

You feel the molten heat in his gaze as his eyes roam over you.

“And then I smelled the most delicious scent. It made me desperate, made me lose control of my own thoughts for a couple of minutes. The smell of your heat was wonderful, omega. I knew I had to find you.”

You open your mouth to respond, but your eyes catch movement of a waitress coming your way.

“Hello, my name is Teresa, I'll be your waitress this evening. Are you ready to order?” She rushes out, smiling politely though you notice that her eyes linger on William for a few moments more.

“We're not ready to order yet,” he says, eyes still locked on you, “Can you come back in five minutes?” 

She nods easily, stepping away with a ‘sure thing.’

There's a beat of silence, where you stare down at your menu and read none of the words, head racing with what you know.

“What are you thinking about getting?”

You blink, glancing up at him and then back down to the menu.

“Um, I usually get the turkey on rye, so maybe that.”

“Got any suggestions for me?”

You hum, deep in thought.

“The grilled chicken pesto always smells so delicious, there's some fresh mozzarella in it too. I've never had it, but it's a popular one.”

“You should try it. Mix things up.”

You smile sadly, glancing at the price of the sandwich in question, the fresh mozzarella near triples the price.

“That's okay, I'll stick with my turkey.”

“Don't worry about anything else. If you really want the pesto, get it.”

His eyes are earnest, and you know there's another conversation happening in the subtext of this one. That he was willing to cover the cost, that it was obvious that it was the source of your hesitation.

You swallow, glancing down at the price once again, figuring that one sandwich wouldn't throw him into debt.

A little lump swells in your throat, you wonder if he would expect anything because of this like alphas before. You figure one sandwich did not give him that much leverage over you. You'd done more damage with his coat and he'd overlooked that.

“Okay, I'll have it. What will you get?”

“Steak sandwich.” He answers, with a smile, just as Teresa appears again.

“Ready?” She asks eagerly.

.

“Why did you pick this table?” He asks, studying you.

You glance over at him, having been distracted by some people walking in.

You're beautiful, he squeezes his fists, fighting himself. He wants to provide for you so badly that it tears at him. He can see how defensive you are, how cautious you act sometimes. He knows that you must have had bad encounters with Alphas to be this wary. He wants to learn you, know you better than he knows himself.

“I have a little sensitivity to light.” You respond, absentmindedly, “I can barely see in direct sunlight.”

He inclines his head, noting for later, to avoid anything that would overwhelm you.

“I'm sorry to hear that, sweetheart, it must be so hard to deal with.”

He feels delight fill his body as you give him a wide eyed look, your omega nature appreciating his sympathy to your plights. 

He bites the inside corner of his lip, wanting this sweet, timid omega to be his, very badly.

The urge to have you scent him sharpens, to press your nose to his neck, to have you breathe him in, mix your scents together so that no one would question whether or not you were a mated pair. You'd almost done it earlier, and he hadn't realized how eager he was for it until the moment you'd pulled away.

He had to play his cards right. If he scared you away, he would not get another chance.

.

You talk a lot, about where you grew up, and the schools you went to, and when he tells you about his childhood, you try not to give him any looks of pity, nodding along, eager to listen to everything he has to tell you.

You want to comfort him though, your hands clenching into fists in your lap because you want to reach over and squeeze his hand and tell him you’re sorry but logically you know that you barely know him.

Except that you feel like you’ve known him a very long time. Your face hurts with the amount you’ve smiled, the unfamiliar expression printed onto your face, where you’re usually shy or frightened.

When he asks about you, you feel a little more comfortable revealing personal information. Describing the details of your job so that he understands your day to day work.

“Does it pay well?”

“You know it doesn't.” You grumble sadly, “I would take up a second job if I could, but companies have this rule about how many hours an omega is allowed to work weekly.” You stop talking, waiting to see what stance he was going to take on this. The entire job market was designed to push omegas into the arms of alphas or betas rich enough to take care of them. 

His mouth turns down into a frown.

“They should just pay people liveable wages to begin with. Having a second job would be too much for anyone. At least tell me you get health insurance.”

You make an unsure face.

“For the most part, but there are… big gaps.”

His eyebrows crush together in sympathy.

“You get heat days?”

You nod, taking a few sips of your drink.

“Yeah, they give us three, and I usually have to take two extra sick days because I have longer heats.”

“Wait, they don’t give you days specific to your heat requirements?”

You let out a little awkward laugh.

“No, three heat days, giving more days to some people would be unfair according to them.”

He clicks his tongue, “That must be so hard.” He hums, and something primal sparks inside of you.

Yes, your mind screamed at him, yes alpha, I’m a poor little thing, please soothe me and take care of me and keep me warm and safe and full-

You clear your throat.

“I get by.” You reply.

He shakes his head, deep in thought.

“It’s still not fair.”

.

You let out a slow sigh when you take your first bite of the sandwich.

Eyes closed, you can't believe what you're tasting, that it could be so delicious.

You do your hardest not to take a second bite before finishing the first, determined to savour it.

Across from you, he makes a low hum when he bites into his, and you fight a smile, stomach fluttering, happy that he likes it.

“Maybe you can find another job?” He suggests between bites.

You blink, shoulders dropping.

“I've been trying, it's just not that easy,” You look down at your sandwich, a touch of sadness fills your chest, “Sorry, I don’t mean to complain.”

“It's okay, I want to hear about it.”

You let out a harsh breath, your stomach turning over.

“Why? Because you smelled my heat and decided I was going to be your omega?” You blink, regretting the words as soon as they come out, drawing back into yourself and waiting for him to get angry.

“I'm sorry,” you say when he doesn't immediately speak, “I shouldn’t have- I'm sorry.” You take a shallow breath, feeling the panic grip you tightly.

“Don't apologize, sweetheart, you didn't do anything wrong.”

You don't meet his eyes, still trying to get control of your fears.

You hear movement, and in your peripherals, you watch him slide out of the booth and to a stand. Oh god, was he leaving? You feel your eyes begin to swell with tears. 

You'd done it, successfully chased him away.

Your breath stutters when his plated sandwich slides in beside yours, and finally, you glance up at him.

“May I?” He asks softly, and you automatically comply without thinking, sliding deeper into the booth to give him more space.

He fits himself in, while you grab a napkin to blot at your tears, a little embarrassed now that you realize he wasn't actually leaving.

“S-sorry.” You whisper, trying to apologize for this abundance of emotion. For sure, it would definitely annoy him.

Your breath stutters when you feel the warm press of his palm to your shoulder blade.

“Breathe, omega, everything's alright.”

You suck in a shaky breath, his scent wrapping around you.

He moves slowly in your peripheral, moving his hand to brush the backs of his fingers over your cheek.

You finally look at him when he touches you, the sensation leaving tingles behind.

“One more big breath for me.” He guides, and you obey, feeling your brain respond to his gentleness.

His eyes are warm, chocolate, a feeling of ease settles into the base of your spine.

“When I smelled you on my coat for the first time, I knew I had to find you. But, finally meeting you, and slowly getting to know you, is what makes me want to stay. You're not my omega, and I'm not your alpha… But I'd like to be.”

My alpha?

Your lips part in disbelief, looking into his eyes, feeling hope swell inside of you.

Maybe he would make a good alpha, maybe he would hold you when you were scared, and kiss your cheek every night before falling asleep, maybe he would hold you tightly and talk to you after sex, and not make you feel like a used item to be discarded-

You shudder out a breath.

“I-I'm not interested in finding an alpha right now.” You stutter out, afraid of his response. 

His eyes remain kind, though there's something in them that makes you think that he's sad.

“I understand, sweetheart. I won't bring it up again.” He turns, bringing his sandwich up to his mouth to take another bite.

You follow his lead with wide eyes, surprised that this was all he had to say on the subject.

After a few bites, shoulder brushing his arm every now and again, you can't hold back.

“You're not… mad?”

You hear him exhale slowly.

“I don't think I could ever be mad at you, little one. I like you a lot, and I'm willing to… be as patient as you need me to be.”

Your heart squeezes in your chest.

“And what if it never happens? I don't want to give you false hope.”

To your surprise, he laughs, low and sweet. It brings a smile to your face though you don't know the joke.

“I'm going to have hope whether I want to or not. That's the consequence of wanting.”

Want.

“You want… me?”

“I thought that was obvious.”

“Well, yes, I guess it was, but…” You let out a disbelieving laugh, shaking your head, “I'm sorry, this is so crazy.”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why is it crazy?”

“Bec-” You couldn’t say it out loud.

He turns to you, studying you intently for a moment.

“I mean, well, look at me.” You say softly.

He raises his eyebrows.

“You're lovely.” He murmurs.

You can't help the shy smile that it brings to your face.

.

To no one's surprise, he pays.

You let him, because you were in no position to offer any kind of payment, and he was willing to lose a three thousand dollar coat on a whim. 

When he offers you a ride home, you feel comfortable enough with him to accept, looping your arm around his bicep when he extends his elbow for you to take.

The muscle below is firm, and you simmer with delight at the privilege he gives you.

You look around as you walk together, taking in the scenery around, watching as someone throws a frisbee, and a dalmatian runs to catch it.

“I take it you don’t like me, then.” He says, interrupting your thoughts.

“I do.” You blurt so quickly that your brain doesn’t have time to catch up. There’s something aching in your chest at the thought that he was unlikeable to you.

You take a deep breath, smiling sadly.

“That’s the problem. I like you, and that will cloud my judgement. My past experience has made following my heart almost impossible… and alphas…” You swallow, “Alphas can be scary, and they flip so suddenly sometimes,” you let out a sigh, shaking your head, “It's dangerous to trust an alpha.”

“It hurts me to hear you say that.” 

“I'm sorry.” 

“I'm the one who's sorry. I'm so sorry, and angry that you've had so many bad experiences with alphas. I'm sorry that they made you feel unsafe. I know it doesn't hold much weight right now, but I'd never hurt you.”

You're almost inclined to believe him.

“I guess we'll see.” You say, giving him a meaningful look.

He grins down at you.

“I like the sound of that.”

.

His car is heavy with his scent. You close your eyes, heart racing, breathing in deep lungfuls, feeling your brain go hazy with it.

Your skin gets hypersensitive, the feel of his leather seats brushing your thighs, the way it feels on your fingertips, makes you drunk in a way you've never felt before.

You don't give him your real address, but one that's a block over so that he doesn't see the hovel you really live in. 

It's hard to focus on anything outside of the vehicle, when his engine purrs to life and the sound vibrates your eardrums gently, he makes sure you're buckled in, before starting off.

He doesn't race, takes his time, moves reasonably. It makes you feel safe, settles you. You'd been a little worried he was an aggressive driver, but you had nothing to worry about.

You blink in surprise when he extends his phone to you, unlocked, his hands catching your eye, a work of art you could stare at for hours.

“Pick some music?” He offers.

You nod, fingers brushing his, and you select something soothing, lo-fi, to enjoy.

You get hypnotised by it, the bergamot and notes of citrus, cracked pepper that makes you hum, delighted. If this was what being in his presence was always like, how would you ever leave?

You wanted to press your nose to his neck, breathe him in right from the source, you wanted this scent soaked into your pores until it followed you everywhere. You wanted this smell in your nest, clinging to your things.

You're so needy by the time he pulls over, eyes glassy with want, you notice his hands are gripping his steering tightly.

“Omega,” he says, a slight tremble to his voice, “Do you want to scent me? It'll help you relax.” 

It wouldn't. You knew it from the bottom of your heart, scenting him would only make you want him more. But your hindbrain's in control now, and all you do is nod shakily, fumbling to unbuckle your seat belt.

He covers your hands calmly, doing it for you when you struggle too many times. You look at him shyly when you're both free.

He gives you a warm smile, before tilting his head up, exposing his gland to you.

Your heart pounds in your ears, a thrumming that fills your head, almost too loud as you lean forward, pressing your face to his neck.

He groans, and you reach to fist his shirt tightly in your hands, taking in a deep breath.

This was your alpha, there was no denying it, no other scent had ever took hold of you the way his did, everything else was rotten in comparison, and you were losing grip of your sanity with each passing moment.

You breathe him in, memorizing it, the extra kick, straight from the source, your hindbrain takes full control in these moments, and you're completely helpless to it.

“Alpha.” You sigh into his neck, and you feel him shudder beneath you.

You tilt your head up, lips brushing his gland, he groans loudly, the sound echoing in your ears, drowning out the thrumming of your heart for just a moment.

“That's it, omega," He guides, "Take what you need.”

You whine, if you really took what you needed, he'd already be at home in your nest, ready to make you his.

You tilt your head higher, and he turns to look at you with heated eyes, your noses brush in the quiet of his car.

Someone walking past catches in your peripheral, and you gasp, reeling back, realising where you were.

“S- sorry.” You say, scrambling away, reaching to unlock the door, stepping out and bolting as fast as your legs can carry you, too afraid to look back at him.

It takes you three orgasms in your bed before you begin thinking again.

.

.

.

[hotdogdynamitezzz]

Your Fashion and Style Guide

Pt.1

Part 2 (Libra - Pisces) Here

Use your Rising & Venus sign!

Aries:

Prioritizes comfort but doesn't compromise for their fashion style

Absolutely rocks streetwear & athleisure

Prefers sporty fits the most!

Looks best in red & black clothing

Their style always has some sort of edge to it

Big on grunge and vintage rockband t shirts

They love combat boots and they generally prefer flame or camo print clothes

This sounds odd but they kinda remind me of a racecar aesthetic?

Very Sharp with their fashion choices

They look great in leather jackets

A bold colour paired with a neutral for a high contrast look suit them best

They love the rockstar or baddie aesthetic

Looks ~

Taurus:

They have three modes, classy bitches, edgy e-girls & bohemian botanical.

But generally, I see classy and soft the most

Green, Brown, Beige, White, Black, Pink & Red for sensuality.

They love wearing neutrals but they often mix it up with some colour now and again

They usually have some sort of special necklace

A fan of pearls because it's classic

But diamonds are their best friends too ofc

Fuzzy & Fluffy cardigans or sweaters have their heart, especially the white and brown colours

They are into floral and flannel patterns

Their favorite colour options are brown & pink or white & pink 🕊💕

They usually dress more modest but make it look high fashion

They usually like to incorporate silk or a corset into their outfit, being ruled by venus makes them into a sensual and seductive look

Generally they favour comfortable fabrics and silk

Looks ~

Gemini:

I noticed they don't really like dark colours and generally prefer brighter neutrals or colours

They like off-the-shoulder, cold shoulder, cutout tops & cool designs on their shirts whether its long sleeve or not

They choose tops based on the arm style such as balloon sleeves or cutouts

Asymmetrical styles suit them best

Colors are white, bright pinks, and green.

Earrings & Bracelets are their favorite accessories

They like a fairy aesthetic, something that feels whimsical

Likes to switch between feminine and masculine clothing frequently

Very experimental with their clothes

Looks ~

Cancer:

Either soft and girly or moody and dark!

They prefer to keep it modest unless showing off their chest

Their choice of jewelry are pearl necklaces

The shoes they tend to favour are chunky block heels & sandals

Prefers blue, pink & white or black

Soft and flowy clothes like cardigans or kimonos

Knee high socks + sweater dresses look great

They love sweetheart necklines

Into crop tops! Usually silk crops

They like to pair tight clothes with a flowy jacket! Especially if it has a pop of colour

Overall style changes depending on how they're feeling that day

Looks ~

Leo:

Everytime I looked up a Leo rising celebrity that were ALWAYS wearing sunglasses

A fan of sunhats too!

Anything bright & metallic suit them perfectly

They look lavish in silky and shiny materials

They tend to wear fur coats

They like long and sturdy coats in general!

Usually they own big statement jewelry

Everything looks shiny tbh especially their hair.

Sparkly clothes & sequins are their weakness

They could rock sundresses

They look great in animal print, specifically cheetah or leopard.

Bold fashion is their go-to

Even if they wear neutral colours they make sure the texture stands out

Jumpsuits were really popular among them! I think they like to look playful but glamorous at the same time

They will not leave the house unless they look ready for a fashion show lol

Their motive is to standout and turn heads.

Looks ~

Virgo:

Less is more for them

They like simple t-shirts with cute mottos like "be kind" or some shit that HAS to be written in small font or they won't wear it LOL

A Preppy Style & Sweater Vests are their thing

So is gingham print

They rock high-fashion looks

Fake glasses are a cute trend they look good in

A big fan of trench coats and cardigans

They prefer a business casual look

They prefer earthy tones & greens.

They are all about the simplicity in versatility! For instance they usually like black jeans and a white top but the top can be a tube top or a halter top based on what they want that day

They LOVE BLAZERS

Very picky about fashion, I find super bright colors often turn them away

Quality > Quantity for them

A lot of them look great in crop tops, or waist accentuating clothing like kim k is known for

Watches are usually a staple item they prefer

Looks ~

[coqxettee]

How to be Coquette:

IN AUTUMN ( a guide)

🍂˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚☕️

🍂˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚☕️ ⋆｡˚ 🍁🎃🍂

It’s the best time of year (in my opinion) and dressing Coquette/embracing the Coquette lifestyle in the colder months is one of the best things about this aesthetic.

Here’s how to be coquette in Autumn/Fall: ♡

˖⁺.🎧🍂☕️🎃🕸️˙⊹🤎🧸 ˖⁺.

THE COQUETTE FALL WARDROBE: (I’m doing a desperate blog post on this but here are some essentials to get your wardrobe going) Oversized sweaters, long sleeved tops, oversized cardigans, pleated skirts, jeans, long skirts, tights, leg warmers D.M’s or Mary Janes, a tote bag.

Try and ROMANTICISE SCHOOL. We’re now officially in “back to school” season, and romanticising school is a great way to get through it (I have a separate blog post on this coming soon and have also made videos about it!) but just think… Early morning’s, drinking coffee in bed and reading, getting up early to study when it’s still dark outside and everyone’s still asleep, reading on your breaks in school, listening to music on the way to and from school… ahhhhh perfect <3

Drink Coffee! (If you don’t like Coffee, drink warm drinks like Tea, Hot Chocolate etc) in pretty mugs and coffee cups. Try and start a mug collection!

Study more. This time of year seem so much more motivational to be studying in. Every night, set aside a designated time. Light some candles, make a snack, get a warm drink, put your headphones on, get a blanket and get studying <3

Start an “Autumn Journal” fill it with beautiful pictures of Autumn, leaves, doodles, pictures of you and your friends from this fall. Then decorate the front of it with Autumn leaves, ribbons, bows and lace <3

Bake! Baking is such a coquette activity especially this time of year. Invest in an apron, & try baking some really Autumnal treats, such as cinnamon rolls, pumpkin pie and heart jam cookies! (There are LOADS of recipes online for loads of cute Autumn baking treats)

Watch Autumn movies and shows to get you in the mood! Gilmore girls (ofc), over the garden wall, You’ve got mail, when Harry met Sally, Dead poets society & Harry Potter are some of my faves <3

Make a “Coquette Autumn” playlist and fill it with Lana (ofc) Taylor Swift (Folklore & Evermore are on top) and beautiful classical music you can listen to when studying. I actually have my own “Coquette Fall” playlist that I will link and you can listen to right here!

Decorate your bedroom/space for Autumn. Invest in some light Autumnal bedsheets, pink brown & beige blankets and throws, fairy-lights, candles, pillows, a bed canopy, seasonal garlands. Anything that is going to make your room feel like an Autumnal Coquette Princess sanctuary <3

READ. Read every chance you get. Reading more books this time of year is just so much more magical for some reason. You want to be that person who is always seen reading, beauty & brains. Read whatever you like! Try and pick up some classics if you want to challenge yourself or something with Autumnal cozy feels. You could even try the “Rory Gilmore reading challenge” but this might take a while…

Use “Rory Gilmore” as inspiration for this time of year! Rory is such a good role model (in some aspects) she’s comfy, but cozy and cute with her fashion, she’s incredibly intelligent and knowledgeable and always pushes herself to exceed. Try doing your homework or assignments as soon as you get them, drink coffee and wear oversized cable-knit sweaters, then take an Autumnal walk to feel like Rory

Keep an “Autumn Diary” and every night before bed, kiss the pages and write/reflect upon the day you have had. (Listen to classical music whilst you write, it’s so relaxing!)

Create COZY Morning & Night routines. This way you will be motivated when you wake up, and relaxed/happy when you go to sleep. Getting into a routine is so important for a productive day <3

Go to a coffee shop, get a coffee or hot drink, listen to classical music in your headphones and read/study! (Bonus points if your wearing an oversized sweater)

Try out some new Autumn hairstyles for school. Adorn your hair with Autumn coloured ribbons and bows

Look into some “Autumnal self care” activities. This could be as simple as purchasing a new pumpkin hand cream or updating your entire skincare/beauty care routine with new Autumn scents, colours and products. Now we are coming into the colder months, our skin and body’s “well being” is so important!

Take up some Autumn hobbies. (Crocheting, painting, flower pressing, baking etc) all are such beautiful and sweet hobby’s, very cozy and perfect for this season!

Take LOADS of Autumnal walks. Around your city, your school, where you live. Collect Autumn leaves and flowers when your walking to later press into an old book on your vanity, and use them in your journal <3

Try a new Autumn makeup look. The coquette “Doe” eye makeup is so perfect or this time of year, and experiment with Browns, Beige’s and coppers in your eyeshadow

Drink Pumpkin spice latte’s from Starbucks and read whilst your getting your coffee

Keep applying lipgloss/lip balm throughout the day, hand cream and moisturiser of an evening, this weather makes your lips and skin dry-up like crazy!

Invest in some new pink or brown, cozy Autumn pyjamas (make sure they are warm and cozy!)

Have a signature Autumn scent (Miss Dior, Chanel?) something deep and dark for the colder months <3

Update your Autumn handbag/purse/schoolbag and fill it with all of your cold weather, studying, school and Autumn essentials! (I’m making a separate post on this soon)

Eat soups, Pumpkin pancakes, oatmeal, hot- chocolate’s, homemade cookies and bread! All are such Autumnal foods <3

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🍂๋࣭ ⭑⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

I hope this helped some of you Romanticise (what I now consider to be the best time of year) and make it the most Coquette Fall you’ve ever had, I love you all and will see you tomorrow (I’m going to try and blog everyday throughout Autumn)

Sending you all my love… - (@coqxette)

[deanbrainrotwritings]

— THE BODY

SUMMARY : tish dared priestly to wear a dress to work in exchange for a week off. he looks so hot.

PAIRING : boaz priestly x fem!reader

CHARACTERS : none

WARNINGS/TAGS : nsfw (18+), smut, panty-kink, manhandling of priestly ;), sub!priestly or maybe he’s just being a feminist idk

WORD COUNT : 3.2k

A/N : title from close your eyes’ song. i’m still mad that he ended up looking normal in the end! there’s a bts reference on accident. also, also, i didn’t feel like writing this until I watched Rent, and I wanted to see jensen in a dress, lmao. anyway, i imagined him in this dress. we can also pretend it’s dean bc we all know he would. Xx

Priestly stepped into Y/N’s room, standing in the doorway like a toddler who had thrown up on themselves, waiting for her to look up at him. She was working on something in her laptop, her brows furrowed in focus, with her teeth pressing into her bottom lip.

She saw him out of the corner of her eye, “hey, Priestly,” she greeted distractedly. “How was your day, baby?” Still staring at the screen and typing away with two open books surrounding her bed, he stared at her pretty face intently, hoping she’d turn to look at him. When he dropped his bag loudly on the floor and didn’t reply, she finally turned to look at him, confused and concerned.

She’d studied his face first, smiling softly at his appearance, his hair in a Mohawk sprayed red, the black eyeliner that made the pretty colour of his eyes pop, his cute beard, the way his lips were a little unnaturally pink. He’d probably used some of her makeup, the tint that made the colour of lips look a little more natural.

But what made her blink at him in surprise was the white dress he was wearing. Almost instantly, a little smirk tugged at the corner of her lip and she quickly admired the way the dress fell over the curves of his body, tight and short with a sexy little slit on the front of his thigh.

He blushed, scratched anxiously at his beard and waited for her to say or do something as he stood there in the mini lace dress. The only thing that was off to her about his lovely appearance were the white socks and the matching Converse he was wearing, but other than that, he looked unsurprisingly pretty. He’d felt confident the whole day, but now he felt embarrassed and naked, which was new because Y/N usually enjoyed all his fashion choices.

“Wow,” she finally said, chuckling. “Come here, princess,” she teased, shutting her laptop and pushing it away along with her books. He rolled his eyes, pouted and walked towards her. Stomping towards her was more what he did, childishly he slouched in front of her, but he let her have a closer look at the dress.

He chewed on his lip when she hummed and curiously reached out to touch the lace of the sleeves. She slid her fingers down the slightly flared long sleeve, her fingers pinching the scallop edge experimentally, which matched the hem and the collar that covered the tattoo of his neck.

She bit her lip, looked up at him with a seductive smile when she moved her hand to the hem of the dress where the slit was. She undid the rhinestone buttons to make the slit longer, higher so she knew he wasn’t wearing boxers. Her lips were pressed together in amusement at the thought, he knew it, felt his face heat up even more when she slid her hand up to the dress to feel the silky underwear he was wearing.

“Ooh, sexy,” she smirked at him when she felt the lace edge of the underwear on his hips. She continued to stare up at him until he averted his gaze and shifted shyly, his fingers curling tightly around the hem of the dress. She finally looked down, peaked at the beige colour of the bikini underwear that nearly matched his skin, and pulled so it snapped against his skin.

She looked up at him again, let her eyes trail up the seams that followed the shape of his Ken-doll body, when she realised she could see his tattoos and his toned muscles. “Wait, it’s see-through?” She asked excitedly, sitting up on her knees to get a closer look at his chest, and saw his nipples through the thin material.

“Okay, I’m gonna take it off now…” he told her shyly, but she stopped him.

“Nuh-nuh, you look so fucking pretty.” Her voice had a little bit of awe and a flirtatiousness in it so he froze, his lips parted and he nodded mindlessly when she smoothed her hands down his sides. “So, what’s the story?” She grinned at him, moved her hands under the dress again to rest her hands on his hips.

“Well, Tish dared me to—oh!” He moaned, closing his eyes at the feeling of her warm hand moving up and down over his semi-hard dick. She hummed for him to continue, didn’t stop rubbing his dick as it hardened more, so he looked down at her in surprise. “Well, they all wanted to see me go through with it… I think they doubted I’d go through…” he bit his lip, paused to hold his breath when she moved her hand over the tip of his cock, and he knew she could feel the silky underwear dampen with precum.

His mind was hazy, jumbled and unfocused so he couldn’t tell his story straight. He had no idea where to begin or what was important, utterly unaware that what he was saying made absolutely no sense. He didn’t care, and frankly neither did she. She gathered those bits of information and didn’t question it, because in the end, all that mattered was that he looked and sounded so hot.

“Um… I’d get a week off if I went the whole day…” He trailed off and pouted when she moved her hand out from underneath the dress. He enjoyed getting this reaction out of her, his breath almost instantly became hot and heavy, his skin flushed and warm following the blood that moved with the rapid beat of his heart.

“A whole week for me?” She asked, just teasing a little. She leaned forward to kiss his neck, revelled in the little hitch in his breath, in him reaching out to hold her hips. He nodded, saying nothing in response, only wishing to enjoy her kisses on his throat, the rough bites on his neck, and possessive suckling under his jaw.

“Fuck,” he moaned, letting her continue to kiss him and feel the white dress on his body. She traced the rhinestone buttons on his chest with her curious fingers, from where it started at the collar to where it curved up over his peck and then down toward the side of his chest.

She pulled away from his neck, moved her lips down to his nipples and sucked at them through the lace. He bit his lip at first, nearly wanting to silence the sounds that started to bubble up in his chest, but decided against it when her fingers moved to tease his other nipple, brushing and pinching until he arched his back and he groaned hotly.

“Is this yours to keep?” She asked, getting off the bed to stand in front of him and change the position. He moved back to give her some space and nodded quickly, about to respond to her with an obedient ‘yes’, when she manhandled him onto the bed. He moaned—surprised and pleased, looked at her from over his shoulder and then turned to lay down on his back. “You’re so good,” she praised, pulling the soft sleep shorts she was wearing down her legs.

“Anything for you,” he murmured, trying to kick off the damned Converse from his feet. He struggled to even get them to move past the heel, instead his socks started to shift lower, and he bit his lip in his struggle.

She chuckled, starting to undo the buttons from the flannel that she’d stolen from him. He was sheepish in his failed attempts to remove his shoes, so he quit trying to get them off, distracted by the sight of her in his clothes. She didn’t give him time to admire her nakedness, because she focused on undoing his shoe-laces and then she slipped the shoes off his feet as if he were a princess. He was sure his face had turned red in that instant, but at the same time, he really liked the way she treated him so gently compared to how she’d pushed him onto the bed.

“I can’t believe me in a dress is doing it for you,” he said breathlessly, lifting the dress up his hips, and then watched her take her underwear off.

“Baby, anything you wear does it for me.” Her response was so quick and earnest, it made him swoon. His eyes softened, despite being aroused, he felt a warm feeling bloom in his chest. That was the case, until she crawled up his body and kissed his dick over the underwear, her tongue running flat over his bulge too. His heart lurched excitedly and his toes curled at the feeling, at the sight of her between his open legs.

She kissed his thighs, the way he would before he ate her out, teasingly and lovingly. She worshipped his body with her mouth and her fingers followed, thumbs smoothing over his hips bones, moving the underwear out of the way tortuously to create just a fract of pleasurable friction.

She lifted the dress up a little more, kissed his stomach, his pelvis, and everywhere else except for where he was twitching and throbbing for her attention. He didn’t even want it to end, didn’t dare to beg because he loved the wordless praise, loved the way she sucked at his skin to leave velvet marks, and the way she licked at his soft flesh, tasting him with little moans.

“Please,” it came out before he could stop it. He tensed a little when she stopped because he was definitely enjoying himself, but she was going up, reaching for his lips. His mouth parted, ready for hers but he groaned in irritation when she kissed his chin instead. She teasingly nipped at his lip, felt him squirm beneath her, and rubbed her wet pussy over his dick.

“Shit,” he hissed, a smirk growing on his face, “if I’d known women’s underwear felt this nice…” he chuckled, holding her hips and guiding her movements, distracted with the way she finally kissed him.

He could feel her arousal seep through the thin material of the women’s underwear he was wearing. He felt so needy when his cock was wet in her desire and throbbing to be inside the warmth of her cunt. He needed to guide this, needed to cum so bad, he started to lick into her mouth as soon as her lips were pressed against his. But she simply didn’t give in to him and he couldn’t give a damn about taking control when she was making him feel good, now sucking his tongue into her mouth so he felt like he wasn’t breathing.

He only moaned loudly into the kiss and let her grab his wrists to pin them over his head. He liked this, chased after her lips when she pulled away to stare at him smugly. He didn’t care about control or ending the foreplay, he just wanted to feel her close, always. But her small hand around his wrists wasn’t enough physical contact for him, he wanted to feel her everywhere.

So, he whined at her playfully and moved his hips up into her with care, struggling to keep his hands above his head simply because he wanted to feel her soft skin under his hands. He was squirming, getting needier by the second, just admiring her and wishing she could just be plastered all over his body forever.

“Just… let me enjoy this,” she said mischievously. She looked so hot in his flannel, with the ripped up sleeves that nearly covered most of her upper arms, the way it fell off her shoulders sexily now that she’d unbuttoned it, revealing her bare chest. The only good thing about summer in California was getting to see her look more sexy than usual by dressing half-naked at home. Or even better, wearing just his clothes with nothing underneath.

He pouted, rolled his eyes, and turned his face to the side. Even when she started to unbutton the dress at the top, he pretended to be uninterested. Even once her soft lips chased the skin she uncovered. He felt her smirk when he wiggled under her, and he clenched his fists to stop himself from touching her, because she may not have said it, but he wasn’t allowed to touch her right now. Her tongue started lapping at his velvety skin, tracing the tattoos she could reach, sucking where his skin was unmarked by ink.

“Tell me you’ve enjoyed this enough…” he whispered. Desperate for more, more friction, more of her touch, more of her everywhere.

“Then I’d be lying,” she murmured against his skin, “I don’t lie to you…” She pouted innocently, her eyes shining playfully, but still she moved up to kiss him again.

His hands moved instinctively to hold her face, but he stopped himself halfway and gripped the pillow beside him instead. He squeezed it tightly, desperately trying to hold onto something when she sucked on his lip, her hands sneaking down between their bodies to pull the underwear he was wearing aside.

“But I do want to move on to the fun part,” she whispered. When she wrapped her hand around his hard cock, he moaned, his head pressing back into the mattress. She didn’t even care if the red hairspray would taint the sheets seeing him look this beautiful and needy. She just gave him little kisses that began at the corner of his mouth and started to spread his precum over the tip and down the rest of his cock. “I’m gonna sit on your face later, it’s just so pretty,” she mumbled against his cheek.

“Fuck… yeah,” he agreed excitedly, turning his face to the side, hoping to reach her lips. “Let me touch you,” he murmured, trying to get her lips closer, but she was moving back, torturing him with a little smirk. Her hand tightened around his cock, squeezing to draw out a grunt from him, her gentle fingers massaging under the tip. “Please, baby, let me touch you,” he whispered, sounding more wrecked.

Her stomach clenched at his voice, but instead of giving in and responding, she kissed him roughly. He took that as an invitation and let go of the pillow to hold her face at last. She didn’t force him away this time, let him tangle his fingers in the hair at the back of her neck, his tongue moving against hers deep in her mouth. His stomach was flipping excitedly at the taste of her, and his other hand began to move down her body, to slide his fingers through her wet folds.

They both pulled away at the same time to moan, his hand moving from behind her neck to grasp her thigh harshly instead. She panted on his lips when his fingers moved through her weeping cunt, sliding through the embarrassing amount of arousal that soaked her folds up to her clit. The feeling of how wet she was turned him on, all he could think was that he’d caused it, that and the flushed state she was currently in.

He slid his fingers through her wetness the way he’d do with his cock and brought them into her pussy, pushing deep so she stretched around his two fingers. He could feel her warmth and more arousal cover his hand when he pulled his fingers out and pushed them back into her. She rested her forehead on his shoulder, muffled her already soft moans with the dress he was wearing.

With her chest pressed against his, her nipples tightened when brushing against the lace of the dress and her walls fluttered around his fingers. With her hand on his chest, she sat up, moved her hand on his cock faster, twisting her wrist so deliciously he felt so close to his release and he didn’t want to stop it from happening, but he also didn’t want the pleasure to end so soon.

She ground her hips into his hand, getting her clit stimulated on his palm, and both of them looked away from each other to shamelessly watch their hands work between their bodies. Her small hand wrapped around him was slick in his precum, but not nearly as soaked as his hand was from her wetness. He groaned, grabbed her wrist to stop her from making him finish, and slipped his fingers out of her.

“Ready?” He whispered, patting the back of her thigh so she’d move closer, allowing him to fill her up all the way. She nodded, slipped out of the flannel, threw it over her books and lowered the panties he was wearing down to his knees. She snickered playfully, ignored his annoyed huff and the roll of his eyes when she finally lined the head of his cock with her entrance, slowly sinking down on him while biting her lip.

“So good,” she whispered distractedly, her breath catching in her throat the farther she took him into her cunt. She panted, ground her hips against his to adjust to the size of him, comforted by the way he brushed his thumbs along her hips. He waited patiently for her despite throbbing inside her, just slid his hands up to her waist, guiding her to lean over him slightly.

“I love you,” he breathed out, pulling her closer still, until she kissed him again. Her lips moved against his slowly, occasionally bumping against the labret stud, her nose brushing against the two nose ring hoops when she tilted her head. Once she deepened the kiss, her tongue slipped into his mouth, and she lifted her hips before she sank back down.

He moaned against her, squeezed her waist, and bent his knees but could only keep them apart a certain distance because the underwear started to dig painfully into the flesh of his taut thighs. It turned him on, both the knowledge of having worn panties, but also the feeling of being restricted. She knew that about him and he just knew that’s why she’d lowered the underwear where they were.

He thrusted up into her, met her thrusts slowly at first, until they both picked up the pace. With one of her hands beside his head and the other on his chest where his heart was, she stabilised herself. She felt every inch of him move in and out of her smoothly, then watched him crumble slowly almost as close as she was to her orgasm.

He was holding back and she knew it, brought her hand away from beside his head to rub quick circles on her clit. Right as her walls fluttered around him and she moaned his name, he came inside her, falling apart so prettily beneath her with a strangled moan.

“I love you,” she murmured, resting all her weight on him, finally returning his sentiment. He wrapped his arms around her, smiling tiredly, but otherwise felt so light and warm from his orgasm. Holding her was just a bonus and kissing her was the main treat.

He whined playfully when she shifted and started to pull away, pouted when she moved off his lap, but let her remove the underwear which was keeping him restrained. She threw it carelessly onto the floor and climbed up his body again while smiling softly and placed a kiss on his forehead, her lips lingering lovingly. “Never change, Boaz Priestly,” she murmured.

taglist

@rominaszh @lanassmarty @murdockscumsock @candy-coated-misery0731 @kellynickelss @spnfamily-j2 @deansbbyx @lickmybawls (lmfaooo) @zepskies

main masterlist

boaz priestly masterlist

© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED TO DEANBRAINROTWRITINGS 

do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or republish my work on another platform

[genderbinaryisforlosers]

[basic ID in alt, detailed ID below]

i love them more than words can say. already i wish i could listen to the children's adventure for the first time all over again.

[ID: 1. A height chart lineup showing the main characters of The Wizard, the Witch, and the Wild One side-by-side in the main campaign and the Children's Adventure. In order it is Eursulon, Suvi, Ame & Cool Dog, and Grandmother Wren & Taro.

Eursulon is a huge bear-like creature standing bipedal on digitigrade legs. As an adult (left) he stands to a height of 220cm. His fur around his ears and forehead resembles the plumage of a horned owl. He has an ursine nose and large tusks, and big, hazel eyes. He has white freckles on his face. He is wearing a long green cloak and beige and brown traveller's garb, and a golden pauldron is partially hidden by his cloak on his shoulder. It has a small dent in it but is well polished. In his right hand (viewer's left) he holds a round wooden shield, and in his left hand he holds an unsheathed sword, Wavebreaker, with pale blue silk lining wrapped around the hilt. He has a neutral expression.

As a child, he was still large at about 145cm tall, but had a rounder face, smaller fangs, and shorter feet. He is unclothed except for his golden pauldron, undented, and instead of a sword he is clutching a broom handle with both paws. He is smiling.

Suvi is a Black human girl who stands at around 183cm as an adult. She has a turquoise afro which is pulled back neatly into a bun and decorated with fine gold chains as well as a round golden censer hanging from the back. She is dressed in a smart Imperial blue uniform with gold and silver trim, and wields in her right hand a crystal staff decorated with the Imperial sigil and wings made of floating shards. In her left hand she holds a book bound in dark blue leather. Instead of wearing glasses, her brown eyes are magically treated, which causes a teal sheen to be visible over her pupils. She is smiling confidently.

As a child, she was about 120cm tall and her hair was still dark brown and not tied back. She has yellow asteria flowers in her hair as well as a pencil and a cool leaf, and wore huge round glasses. She wears a red button-up dress with pockets, stripey white tights, and smart indigo shoes. She clutches a brown canvas-bound book to her chest and looks wide-eyed.

Ame is an East Asian girl who stands at around 150cm as an adult. She has long, dark straight hair and dark brown eyes. She has her right hand on her hip while her left hand adjusts her giant red witch's hat. The hat has a white underside and there is a gold censer attached to the pointed tip. She is wearing a white wrap top patterned with pink petals, and the long flowy sleeves have been buttoned back. She has two bracelets around her left wrist, one is woven lilac and green, and the other is small pink flowers chained together. She has red skirt that resembles a toadstool, with white spots on the cap and pink ruffles under the rim. She also has a white half-apron with several pockets tied to her waist by dark pink cord, which also holds a light brown pouch. She has one skinned knee showing above her flowery pink-and-white socks, and red stompy boots. She is smiling out of the corner of her mouth. Wrapping around her legs is Cool Dog, her fox familiar, eyeing the viewer suspiciously.

As a child, she was extremely small at 100cm. She has a bowl cut and dimples. She wears an oversized yellow shirt with white stripes, the sleeves pushed up past her elbows, and orange dungarees. She has muddy red welly boots, and is wearing the lilac and green bracelet. She is grinning broadly with her eyes shut and holding her fists up near her chest.

Grandmother Wren is an old witch standing at about 155cm with light brown skin and frizzy grey-and-white-streaked hair and brown eyes. She is wearing a dark purple witch's hat with a golden buckle and a curling tip, a knitted lilac shawl around her shoulders, and a cable-knit yellow sweater. She is wearing a stripy half-apron over a floor-length patchwork skirt, and is leaning on a gnarled wooden cane with both hands. She is smiling ruefully. Taro, her rooster familiar, is standing on the brim of her hat.

2. A cropped version of the same drawing, this time including Eursulon's glamoured forms. His glamoured form is a Black human, resembling Suvi as if he were her brother, although his eyes remain hazel and his hair is ginger instead of dark brown. He has dark brown freckles on his face and a gap in his front teeth, although the gap can only be seen in his childhood glamour as he is smiling. As an adult, the glamour is dressed identically to the unglamoured form although he's shorter by about 25cm, and his hair is braided back neatly into a bun. He also has some facial hair on his sideburns. As a child, his hair is shorter and styled into mini locs, and he is wearing a white shirt and green shorts, though still barefoot. He is about 15cm shorter than his unglamoured form.

3. A cropped version of the remaining lineup, showing Suvi, Ame & Cool Dog, and Grandmother Wren & Taro. /end ID]

[tmwcs]

S E 7 E N : A F T E R MA T H P A R T 2 W O

OMG you guys i almost gave up bc tumblr (this time) had erased a huge part of my draft towards the end right as i was typing and about to post.......yo......i did the best i could to retype what i could remember and salvage it. it's still good though...just....soooo annoying. anyhow, part 3 is in the works!

um...bc of the retyping, alot of this is not proofread......also some of this was typed up in my phone and i tend to fat finger some of the keys, so please excuse all of that.

Warnings: just mentions of smut, like D in P smut, nothing too crazy. Lots of fluff type things. heheheheheh.

Walking amongst the wild red floral ground, your foot steps are soft and soundless. You admire the view of the moon, as you always have while you take in the landscape of your home. 

Peering up at the peak of the mountain, where your throne sits next to his, you could have flown to the top and made the trip last only seconds, yet it seemed like a night for a walk. Up the stairs, you take one delicate step after another, reminiscing everything that took place within the last year. 

The time went by rather fast, yet all the events that led you to becoming fully immortalized and the aftermath of everything was ingrained in your mind with all the details punching the imagery into your vision. No matter how much time would pass, you’ll always remember the finer lines of each occurrence.

You gracefully walked up each step, delicately and nearly levitating. Even with your wings lying dormant into your own being, your body still experienced amazing leaps and advanced movement.

The business-casual attire you adorned for the mortal realm gradually shifts into different material and form as it extends to the stone ground, developing high slits to expose your legs, the way he likes it. As far as your husband was concerned, the more skin showing for you, the better it was for him. He often vocalized how he loved to see nothing but every inch of your bare nudness…he only wanted to see you. Just you.

Only you….

With the ability to shape-shift your clothing, you dawned the dress he liked on you the most, stating that other than your nude body, the dress he picked out for your to wear in many variations was what made you looked fitting for your title as a Goddess, therefore, if you absolutely felt strongly about clothing yourself, he prefers you wear the dresses he outlined for you.

“My Queen…..you look so beautiful when you wear nothing….but if you have to wear something, I want you to wear these. You’re a Goddess…the child of my former master, therefore you should always look like it…my beautiful girl.”

The flowing dress develops a beige and champagne color. Of all the materials and colors of the dresses with similar pattern, he loved this particular one the most. The dress continues to grow in length, and shifts into a transparent, chiffon material, with a sheer corset-structured bodice that was entirely see through, showing the subtle color and form of your breasts with the twinkling jeweled piercings shining through the mesh element. He also loved that about this gown.

With only the loose straps that hang over your arms loosely, the tightness of the bodice hugs your upper body, stabilizing the true fit, all wrapped with floral lace as the skirt flows wide and freely, making you look like a princess or, a goddess, but far from the goddess of Hell.

You continue to make your way up, gently brushing your hair aside to reveal your collar bones and the skin on your chest. Your dress drags along each step, trailing behind your footprints. You remained barefooted with only the ankle bracelets that he gifted you, among the other pieces of subtle jewelry he decorated your body with.

You took your time delicately walking up towards the peak of the mountain top, yet with your enhanced stamina and lucrative speed, you were reaching the top in no time despite the stairway being miles long. Any other being, whether they emerged from Heaven or Hell, could never travel this far by foot without succumbing to the effects of fatigue, even if it was minor. No demon nor Angel would be able to do what you could do, since you not only shared the same soul as God himself, but you also share the split soul of the one who had taken your mortal life, and blessed you with his own, the Devil himself, Heeseung.

Near the top, you see the pillars that decorated the entire peak, the entry point of his castle. Despite having his own kingdom, his throne, along with yours, was stationed outside, in front of the structured palace, since the view was far better with the red poppies and the glorious moon as the primary features. Of course with the earth off to the West side of the palace, it was an added bonus for whenever you witness the rotation of continents.

A year ago…..

Watching the earth rotate, you watch as each continent on display shifts in rotation, taking turns to relish in in the day, as others sleep at night. Your body had nearly adjusted entirely as you discover the new abilities you’ve gained, laying atop of the platform, the lush velvet fabric comforting your nudeness, the chained cuff delicately wrapped around your ankle, holding a power that, despite its frail appearance, held the strength of immense steel links and restrained you from leaving the parameters of the peak.

Laying on your stomach and chest, your knees propping your feet high as you playfully swing them back and forth, you play with the fortune spheres that he brought in for you. Reflecting the images of the world you no longer belonged to, you were able to examine the visual imagery of your family and the people on their road to recovery. Similar to the Northern Lights, the spheres reflect off a small projection of the scenes, people, and locations you wanted to see. 

As you admired the sight that the spheres projected, your only avenue outside of Hell, you overhear him issue out a deep chuckle as he admired you while you focused on the scenes displayed by the spheres.

Through the miracle of time, you gained more comfort as you took advantage of the slack you had with the ankle chain, and moved around. He’d watch as you get up and stretch your wings, flaring them in their full glory as you stand off to the side of his throne, or when you perched yourself atop one of the large pillars and gazed at the stars directly above. 

...............

“Let’s go for a walk, pretty.” 

Knowing that a change of scenery would be much appreciated, a snap of his fingers and the ankle chain would disintegrate into particles of of atomic value, allowing you to walk freely with him through the fiery red poppies he grew. 

Hand in hand, he’d lead you through a delicate made path, allowing you to reach out and graze your fingertips along the petals, or pick them to your hearts content. 

He’d take you to the Pond of Sacred Sin, a tranquil body of water paired with a soothing waterfall, where the water was granite black. Walking barefoot into the pond, cupping the dark liquid in your hands as the material of your dress flows to the surface, you subtly play as you splashed and decorated the pond with the poppies you picked. Despite the water eluding the silver black color, your hands and dress were wet with translucent drops, not at all stained. It was a remarkable feature, everything was. Hell, was remarkable. At least he made it that way….for you. 

Watching you kicking your bare feet as the loose petals all twirled around, carried by the breeze that dragged them towards you, he took in the delight of seeing you become relaxed and losing the timidness that you initially displayed upon situating to your new home. 

There were even some days, where you opted to remain nude as the velvet cushion of your bedding felt soothing against your skin. You would sit yourself in between his feet, wrapping your arm around his calf as he sat in a relaxed position in his throne, peering his gaze down at you. 

Lifting your hair, he’d stroke his fingers through as you rested your head against the side of his knee, the leather of his knee high boots pressed against the nude skin of your breasts as you felt the sensation of his fingers dragging through your strands, so gently, and so lovingly. 

Too lovingly.

There were times, on certain nights when the demons that roamed aimlessly, roared out, submitting their call to the others as they detect your scent, yearning to devour you. Sensing your presence nearby, the demons would escalate their pace, trying to get to you, and once they did, they would meet their brutal demise as Heeseung would slaughter them effortlessly before they could even reach you.

Yet their calling was unsettling, it would frighten you to hear in the wide open air, not being able to detect which direction it came from or how close they were, yet he would always know, and was more than ready to shred them. Regardless that you were immortal and gained special abilities of your own, you were still learning how to use them, despite knowing and understanding this, there was no way Heeseung would ever allow you to sully your hands or leave you to fend for yourself. HE was your protector. HE was always going to save you. HE loved you. HE worshipped you. HE would do anything for you. HE.....would always give you everything, while keeping you isolated and only obtainable, by only him.

Upon waking up and hearing their roars, you’d get up and let the black, transparent material that was loosely wrapped around your waist by a gold chain, drag against the stone tiles as you walked up to his throne. With nothing adorning your upper body, along with the high slits aligned with each leg, your breasts and the upper portions of your thighs were completely exposed. You resembled a fairy, wrapped with tattered mesh and adorned with ancient jewelry.

You not only continued to be, but you were absolutely stunning, always taking his breath away whenever he watched you stand and expose your entire form in front of him.

Taking merely six steps over to his direction, he’d tilt his head and look up when you breached his chair before him, and watch as you gently sit atop his lap, which he delightfully embraced and assisted you in as he cradled you and let your breasts lay against his chest.

You’d rest your chin atop his head as he nuzzled against your chest plate, reaching up and rubbing your neck as he places sweet and delicate kisses over your skin, all the while your hands would find their way and relax on his shoulders, gripping the material of his knee length coat whenever the demons would roar out again.

It didn't matter how often they would cry out in a devouring and frightening manner, he was always there, admiring you and ready to protect you. Sensing that you were comfortable enough to initiate physical contact, he started to lay next to you more often and cradle you in his arms, easing your frightened state as he stroked your back while you slept.

“Niki.” 

“I’m here.”

“Set the entire river aflame, burn the entire lot of the darkened souls, and set guards to eliminate any that survive and escape. They’re drawn to her. That's why they keep wandering around.....they're looking for her.”

Laying atop the platformed bed, you overhear the conversation Heeseung had with the youngest brother as he calmly instructs him to destroy the Rivery Styx, thus ending the torment of facing the wandering and hungry demons. 

“Their screams are what’s scaring her. Get rid of all of them for me, will you?” 

“Consider it done.”

He was too enamored by your presence to think of setting the river aflame sooner, yet once he had Niki burn out the entire region of the River Styx, there were no more demons roaming around, completely easing your conscious.

Tracing the trail of stars in the sky, he’d guide your fingers to outline the patterns of the galaxies and constellations, a routine that happens every single night. 

You never thought it would happen, but as time went by, you start to feel more comfortable around him. Since you spent every second of your life with each other, it was bound to happen, yet initially, you had told yourself to never falter and to remain alert, always finding hope that you'd return to the world you were born in. However, time has a way of changing minds and hearts of people, you were not an exception. You did change your mind and your heart in regards to him.....and he loved what he saw.

Developing a familiar nature around him, you no longer felt uncomfortable by his constant stares, his watchful eyes as he gasps and breathed deeply out of lust whenever you did anything, whether it was shifting your position or blinking. Heaven forbid if you smiled or laughed, that drove him over the edge to the point where you found yourself under him again, sometimes multiple times in a day, where he would render you at the mercy of his love, rough or gentle, whatever he was in the mood for.

To avert your attention from the boredom of just laying around all day, you played peekaboo with him. Lurking from behind his throne, and peeking over from the side, over his shoulder, you would chuckle and laugh whenever he glanced at you with a delightful side eye and smirk as he'd catch you by a gentle grab on your neck, and swing you over on to his lap where he smothered you with soft and passionate kisses, all the while you giggling and teasingly try and push him away, only to witness him looking down at you with a joyful smile and a lovesick gaze. 

One event where you were playing the game, you surprised him...and yourself, by displaying a sudden notion.

It was the moment, where you snuck around to the side of his throne, and quickly snuck a gentle kiss on his cheek.

Perhaps it was the feeling of being too comfortable, or maybe it was Stolkholm Syndrome, either way, you felt elated when it happened as you witness the wide eye'd smile he developed as he slightly gasped and took you out of joy.

Thats when you knew.....you developed love for him....the love that he so yearned for in return, it was now finally here.

All the moments of him slaying the demons, serving and protecting you....

Or the way his black hair laid slightly parted off to the side as he stared at you....sometimes raising a brow whenever he found himself overwhelmed by your appearance.

Maybe it was his deep and low voice whenever he leaned in and moaned into your ear whenever he filled you up with his essence, and marked you as his territory.

"I'm cumming.....fuck."

Maybe it was just him....

Whatever the reason was, you were drawn to him just as he was drawn to you. Before you knew it, you became less tense and more open, developing transparent conversations with him and getting to know more about each other, causing you to build an emotional connection, since he already had one with you. Despite already belonging to him....and physically being ravished by him a hundred times over, you had stonewalled any mere thought of developing a bond with Heeseung.....but when you decided to tear that wall down, you found your days and nights filled with smiles and laughter, no longer crying and begging him to send you back to live with mortals....to have your freedom and your old life back.

His vigor and thirst for sexual interaction was unlike anything you've ever seen. He yearned to be one with you constantly, and never thought twice in taking you, even if you had initially objected. He would be forceful, restraining, and isolate you under his frame, knowing that just a matter of time of him entering, he'd have you moaning out his name, gripping onto his arms and biting your lip for more.

And he'd give it......so much more.

The sexual passion never lost potency, yet there were nights where he maintained the rough and domineering nature of his vigor, and then there were some nights where he, while still maintaining ultra dominance, would be softer and more sensual. He would slowly thrust, going in deep….so deep. 

“I love you….more than you’ll ever know…” 

He would whisper against your lips, all the while holding you up, cradling your bottom as your legs wrap around his waistline, crossing over against his lower back. Both your wings in full display, flaring out in full expansion, his black and your Nacre white, contrast from one another in perfect harmony.  Then the time finally came, where you took the initiative and walked over to his seat, straddled him, and expressed your yearning for him. He was so delighted, that he took a moment to close his eyes and gulp down a few breaths as he rested his forehead against your chest plate, trying to ease down his level of happiness for he didn't want to ruin the sensual moment that you were displaying, along with the comfort of riding his thighs.

He finally had you.....just as you had him.

It didn't matter if he had already expressed your meaning and value, he could have said it earlier, wait five minutes, and say it again and his words would come out just as sincere and strong....if not stronger.

Sometimes, he would say it in various languages, both the ancient and the modern dialect, knowing that since you were adjusting to immortality, you'd instinctively would be able to translate, it was part of your abilities, as was his. He claimed that due to not having enough words in just one language to express his love, he felt the need to speak in multiple, never finding it enough to make you feel what he felt.

"How can I make you understand your worth to me? You're better than the five senses.....you're my everything."

"Tu clarior es quam mundus .... Universum es sole et luna pulchrior. Non est res non faciam tibi." (Latin Roman; translation: "You are more than the world….the universe….you are brighter than the sun and more beautiful than the moon. There isn't a thing I wouldn't do for you.")

"أنت حلم كل إله." (Arabic; translation: "You are every god's dream.")

"So etwas wie eine jährliche Blüte gibt es nicht mehr. Deine bloße Anwesenheit vertreibt voller Scham alle Blumen." (German; translation: "There is no such thing as a yearly bloom…not anymore. Your very presence shuns all the flowers away in shame.")

"Kapatid niya na sumisimbolo sa krus....at anak ng pinakahuling lumikha...ang hindi ko ibibigay na makita kang nakangiti sa buong kawalang-hanggan." (Tagalog; translation: "Sister of he who symbolizes the cross….and daughter of the ultimate creator…what I wouldn't give to see you smile for all eternity.")

"나는 단 하나의 이야기를 알고 있습니다....고대 세계의 아름다움, 암사자의 힘, 장미 꽃잎의 부드러움을 지닌 여성의 이야기입니다. 그녀는 하나님이 바라셨던 모든 것, 마귀가 원했던 모든 것입니다. 무엇보다도 그녀는 땅�� 따뜻하게 하는 빛이요, 부정한 자들을 씻는 비요, 사람들을 먹여 살리는 열매입니다. 그녀는 생명을 낳는 숨이요 생명을 유지하는 공기입니다. 나에게 .... 그녀는 전부이고 훨씬 더 많습니다.." (Korean; translation: "I only know of one story….of a woman who carries beauty of the ancient world, strength of a lioness, and tenderness of a rose petal. She is everything that God had hoped for, and everything the Devil had wanted. Above all, she is the light that warms the earth, the rain that washes the unclean, and the fruit that feeds the people. She is the breath that gives birth, and the air that sustains life. To me….she is all and so much more.")

To my former master.....

It's been a while.....who am I kidding? It's been four eternities, yet here I am.

Just what were you thinking? When you created her...molded her....and made her the way you did. Knowing full well that she was to suffer the fate of being imprisoned in Hell, sacrificed to appease your people and to allow them to live in peace and harmony.

You knew what I would do to her...once I had found her...saw her...and took her. You knew....then again, you are God. Of course you knew. There was nothing that any of the muses or angels could say to change your mind, knowing full well that, despite me loving her.... my love is far from kind and humane.

I keep her....I chain her to my throne.....I feast her by day, and devour her by night. I ravish her with the torment of my touch, and burn her with my tongue. Yet, my love is the purest form of love that any one could ever experience. No man, woman, angel, demon, muse, or even you....YOU will never understand the love I have....the love I feel. Ironic, considering that was the whole reason in your creation.....of 'people.'

"Why is he doing this? What is the reason, Master Elder? Does he have any idea...any moral thought of what is going to happen?"

"It is his will to create people Heeseung, and it is his wish that we support our devotion and loyalty to his will."

"I cannot. People will grow harmful and do deeds that are beyond evil. You know that just as well as I do. They will destroy the world that I gifted him, torment each other and slaughter their own kind."

"We must abide by his will, Heeseung. There is a reason for his creation of people. Even though you, your brothers, and all of the angels in his kingdom are his dearest creations, and love him, there is a love that you cannot understand without people. They will be the ones to teach us. That is the purpose of their sole existence. We must aid him on this quest, and provide guidance and nurture people. Just wait and see, Heeseung.....without people.....we cannot learn the love that he wants us to understand."

"Then stand by him on your own. For if he chooses to not heed my words, then I will take my leave and depart from his palace gates."

"What you're saying is treachery against his holy spirt, do not say things so likely Heeseung."

"I do not care, nor do I approve of his decision."

"Heeseung, wait! Come back! Do not abandon your duties as the first and most beloved arch angel!"

"Perhaps I acted out of haste....but so did you. Tell me, how in the world did you ever think of creating such a sight to behold? Her eyes, her nose, her lips, her skin, her face, her body.....her spirit. How do you feel? Knowing that I had taken the piece of you...the light and flesh out of you......and do all these things that makes it scream.....makes her scream. Things that you and your guardians all find and deem as terrible. Yet it is all out of love.....the purest love that is known to mankind.

Your very own spirit.......your only daughter...your mortal daughter....is the Goddess of Hell....my queen....my wife.....mine. Even though this is what you intended for her, to give her up in exchange for the freedom and prosperity of your creation....your 'people'......what will you do now? I had wondered....how will you manage and take care of your mortal creation? There is nothing you could create that will surpass her. With all of your angels dead by each of my brother's hands, and your only archangel deathly drifting in pieces on the surface of the sea at my discretion, how will you manage your people? For now that you're soul is split into two?.....But then I am reminded.....so is mine. Clever old man, you saw that, didn't you? You knew.....you knew just what I was going to do once I saw her.....and took her. The love I have for her.....its sickening and drives me mad.....yet I could never even think of life without her...I wouldn't dare to live a single day of it without her.

Some might think you brought out your trump card too early, yet I feel you didn't bring her out early enough. All those years.....painfully waiting for her to come.....

You have any idea....any moral sense in just what you have done?....You created this amazing form of flesh, blood, and two souls.....knowing that for the longest time, she cried, she begged, she yearned to be away and escape my grasp. You probably heard her cries, and yet, you do not feel sorry....because you knew that this is what she was meant for. To teach and show me....that love for which you created people for.

I used to harbor such hatred and rage against you....I felt betrayed and hurt.....was it anger that kept me going all those years? Perhaps...yet the moment I found out of her....it was only she who had kept me going. She kept me breathing. She kept me from destroying the very thing you loved, and I loathed. How interesting and ironic, old man.

Were you really that afraid of me? That you had to outdo yourself and take out a piece of your own flesh to gift me.......the very thing that I was wanting to destroy. That flesh...that light....that spirt......I wanted to crush it....torture it......and burn it....

Now that I finally have it, I've done nothing but protect, love, and nurture it. I have admired it....taught it the ways of immortality.....

Is it ever a wonder, why I was so eager once I finally had her in my grasp? Could you or any of your muses blame me? I waited so long to have her.....I couldn't control myself.....even though she was going to spend an eternity with me, it pained me....to great extent, when I killed her mortal spirit.....and gave her half of mine. Your piece of light...forever tainted in half by my own....killed off and dimmed by my burning soul. I guess in a way....I got exactly what I had wished for.

I no longer think of you, in aspects of either good or evil.....I do not care anymore. I have a piece of you......and a piece of me......I have angels and demons....Heaven and Hell.....Gods and Kings.....I have both, black and white.....

I have her......

Authors Note: YOooooooo...tumblr had me in ruins because the original note (heelel's mental note to God) was erased when i was type it in the post......i nearly died yall......fortunately i remembered most of it (......most) and retyped it. But onto more important things, stand by for part 3! i will have it out in a day or two. Part 3 will be the finale for this chapter and series....gah....i'm almost in tears.

Taglist: @deobitifull; @solstramaii; @vampiregirl215; @nshmrarki; @enhypen14; @iamliacamila; @lisaaannna; @nikstrange; @jaehaki; @luv-enhy-skz33; @silcry@honeysjae; @crackedcameraa; @stinkmonkey ; @baekxo07@raishaii@yangjungwon33 @lhspeachie ; @differentchildwombat ; @prettykia ; @kimsseonu ; @stvrryhee ; @en-thralled ; @hoonzdzbl ; @yuppppp ; @jinniespuppy ; @browsehnnie @prettykia @lprww @they2luv1naia @ellixqz@mimimovv@stvrryhee

[cleoluvrr]

The Last Days of Summer XIX (Rafe Cameron x Heyward!OC)

Warnings: violence, underage drinking, drug use, verbal abuse, jealousy, forbidden relationship, enemies to lovers, kidnapping, gaslighting + manipulation

Synopsis: Stuck in a situation she never dreamed of, Neriah Heyward blurs the line between Kook and Pogue; Rafe Cameron a witness.

masterlist

word count: 8.2k+

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“Get up.” Rafe says as he bursts into the bedroom without any notice. 

My head jerked up from its limp position, the intrusion interrupting the deeply unsatisfying sleep I barely got. I was kept up all night tossing and turning, mind racing with exactly what you think a person that was slowly going insane would think about. I had fallen asleep when the sun began to rise, the light blue sky peeking through balcony doors being the last thing I saw before my body forced my heavy eyes shut.

Groggily, I sit up in the bed, bones cracking with every movement from their lack of use. The alarm clock on the nightstand read ‘11:15 AM’ and the sun was shining directly into my face from the balcony. I could hear the birds chirping loudly, the normally soothing sound only leaving me agitated from the little sleep I could grab.

“I said get up.” 

Rafe exits the closet that I never saw him cross the room to enter, right hand fiddling with the expensive gold watch decorating the opposite wrist. 

Walking over to my side of the bed, he rips off the comforter I used to cover my head. The cold air of the air conditioned room blasts my body as my hideaway is taken, bare skin of my arms and legs exposed. Rafe throws the white duvet to the floor and looms over my lifeless body.

“What the hell is your problem?” I rasp out, too tired to put effort into properly speaking. Turning over onto my back I stare up at the blonde with a look I can only describe as vexation personified. 

“Get dressed.” Rafe says. His arms flex in the white button-down he’s dressed himself in, sleeves rolled up to the elbows and the few buttons he had done leaving his chest exposed. My eyes travel down to his bottom half briefly to take in the beige linen slacks before flickering back to meet his gaze. “Wear something nice.”

My head lazily flops to the side to stare at the closed door of the closet. I don’t know what he means by “nice,” but I definitely don’t have that in my limited wardrobe. Had I known I was going to be swept away in the night to live on an island I’d never heard of beforehand, maybe I would have packed heavier. 

I turn back to stare blankly at the man standing above me impatiently, arm lifting off my stomach to point at the closet limply. His brows tick up in question, eyes barely landing where my finger guides them before returning them to my face. 

“I don’t have clothes, Rafe.” I point out. “If I knew I was gonna be gone for an indefinite amount of time then maybe I would be more prepared. Thank you for that, by the way.”

Rafe rolls his eyes at me before they turn their attention to his watch. Sighing, he walks over to the closet and yanks it open. His arm moves from his side to gesture me inside, a tight smile grazing his lips. 

Groaning loudly and dramatically I drag myself out of the bed and take a few long strides over to join him. He prompts me to enter again and I do, the blonde following close behind me. I almost throw up when I see what’s on my side of the closet, the absolute clicheness of it all making me want to gag.

The racks held a colorful array of clothes I had never seen in my life, the new garments mixing in with the items I already owned. The shelves lining the bottom held shoes fitting for the weather, a collection of mules and sneakers that I’m sure I could never afford on my own. I feel Rafe watching me as I survey the state of the closet silently, clearly waiting for my reaction.

“Rafe…” My voice is a release of air from the depths of my body, eyes shutting tiredly as the sigh resonates throughout the medium-sized space.

What kind of life am I living? 

I date a guy from the other side of the island, one that I probably should have never been around in the first place, he whisks me away to an island paradise that feels more similar to a prison than anything else, and fills a closet with a new wardrobe to make up for the fact that I had no clothes. It felt like a badly written book that a fifteen-year-old girl would fawn over.

I doubt he thought I would do any such thing, in fact, I’m sure he thought quite the opposite. So the closet that was once bare and now rivals my own back home only leaves me feeling puzzled.

“Why would you do that?” I ask. He’s leaning against the doorframe silently, feet crossed over each other as he takes in my reaction. He shrugs in response, shoulders hiking up just an inch before dropping into their relaxed position.

“You said you had no clothes. So, I bought you clothes.” He says matter-of-factly. I squint at him as he claps his hands together loudly, fingers locking his hands together. He wears a bright smile, though I can’t tell if it’s genuine or sarcastic anymore. “You’re welcome.”

My eyes remain squinted as I stare at him wordlessly, brows drawn tightly together. I dropped the sleeve of a white shirt I had grabbed when I saw it, hands falling to rest on my hips in irritation.

“I thought I told you to not buy me things.” I say exasperatedly.

His eyes travel down my body when he processes what I said. I feel the hairs stand up on my skin as he does it, the night shorts I wore feeling way shorter than I remember as his eyes linger on my legs and the lack of bra seeming much more obvious as his gaze moves to my tank top clad top half. I don’t react to his blatant ogling, knowing that if I do it will only leave him feeling satisfied with himself.

Rafe raises his hand to scratch at his hairless chin, tongue poking through his cheek. His eyes reach mine again after an awkward silence on my end and it feels as though he can see through my facade.

“You can walk around naked for all I care. I was just trying to be nice.” My jaw drops at his words, stunned at the boldness of him. “Is it that hard to just say ‘thank you, Rafe!’ ‘I love you, Rafe!’” He mocks my voice, the high-pitched sound only irritating me more.

He pushes off the wall and approaches me slowly in a casual stride, the sound of his shoes creating a muffled tapping sound from the rectangular carpet resting in the center of the closet. The blonde reaches out to grab the white shirt that I held previously and feels the fabric between his fingers. 

“I have great taste, don’t I?” The way he looked at me made it feel as if there was a double meaning to that question. He releases the shirt and steps backwards until he reaches the door. “Get dressed.” 

He turns on his heel and leaves me alone in the room, the sound of his shoes slapping against the stairs letting me know that he has retreated to the first floor with the rest of his family.

Lucky for me, not that the word ‘lucky’ really means anything to me lately, I packed a small makeup kit in the bag I brought to Tannyhill due to my need to be prepared for anything that comes my way. 

Ironic.

I felt stupid sitting in front of the vanity mirror. I told Rafe not even twenty-four hours ago that I hated being confined in this dollhouse, that I wasn’t going to be some kind of trophy wife with no mind of her own. Yet here I am, blush on my round cheeks and draped in a dress he bought for me. What else could I feel like but a doll? 

Doing my makeup was once a therapeutic process, but now? It felt like a chore. I couldn’t enjoy the way my eyes sparkled with glitter or the way my lips shined with gloss, not knowing that I was doing it for Rafe. Then again, I didn’t have to do it. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to.

I could have protested harder; I could have cut up all those clothes in the closet and threw them in his face. I could run downstairs at any point and arm myself with a kitchen knife to teach Rafe a lesson. That day I went down to the patio and saw the street I could have run away. Logically, that made no sense, but neither did staying here. I sleep beside him, I eat with him, I drool over him when he’s not looking because I have enough shame to know that I shouldn’t be. Now I sit here in front of this mirror in a silly little outfit, painting my face to gain his approval. 

It makes me feel gross. Not because Rafe makes me feel gross, but because deep down I know that if I truly hated all of this as much as I say I do then I wouldn’t be so quick to do what he asks of me. 

He asks for my obedience, and slowly but surely it slips out of my fingers and into his.

I slam the lip gloss tube in my hand down onto the desk, fingers white knuckling the container as I stare angrily into the mirror. I was tempted to run into the bathroom and wash everything off my face. I couldn’t even enjoy my work like I usually would.

I felt like a beautiful idiot.

Rafe’s footsteps make a sudden return, the sound reaching my ears before I even see him enter the room. He clears his throat behind me to make his presence known to me, but I see him clear as day through the reflection in the mirror. Even if I couldn’t, the aura of pure arrogance that follows him around everywhere would suffocate me before long.

“Are you ready yet?” Rafe asks. He sounds impatient, the purpose of his visit clearly to rush me out of the house. “You’ve been in here long enough.”

I sigh dejectedly and stand up, ready to face my fate. I smooth out the back of the floral sundress as I rise, the material slightly wrinkled for how long I’d been sitting on it. Rafe whistles as I turn around to face him, eyes not leaving an inch of my body untouched. It made me feel naked despite the fact that I’m almost fully covered.

He approaches me slowly with a hand deep in his pocket, the flesh of his bottom lip taken captive by his teeth. Rafe never tries to hide the fact that he’s checking me out. Even before all of this, he couldn’t help himself but to devour me with his eyes. Clearly that wasn’t going to change anytime soon. 

“Don’t pout, you’re too pretty.” He notices the defeated look in my eyes and the slight pucker of my lips immediately. I wasn’t sure how exactly he wanted me to act, but he wasn’t going to get happy.

“I’ll do what I want.” I say. I hold up my hand in front of me when he steps too close to me, forcefully making space between us. 

The taller man wraps his fingers around my extended hand and uses it to pull me closer anyways. My bare skin comes into contact with his own, the deep V-neck of the dress leaving me exposed to the heat of his chest. 

“That’s exactly the problem.” He whispers, neck lowering his head to speak lowly into my ear. He pulls back to look at my face up close and his blue eyes travel over every feature, taking in everything and leaving nothing uninspected. “I always let you do what you want. I let you sit in this room all day and do nothing, because I know you need space. You disrespect me and I let it slide because I’m a very understanding guy, y’know? I understand that…that you’re mad, sad, whatever.”

His unoccupied hand snakes around my waist and rests at the small of my back. I swallow thickly at the sudden contact, our closeness beginning to throw me off balance. I don’t try to pull away, knowing that hell we only pull me tighter against him. His fingers drum against my back, rhythmically tapping at the fabric covered skin. 

“I’m more understanding than you, actually. I take your feelings into consideration when I do things, I always have. But you? You–” He cuts himself off with a dry chuckle. Rafe tilts his head to the side, brows coming together above his eyes before he continues speaking. “You never think about how I feel. You just walk all over me, treat me like–like I’m your little bitch or something.”

“Rafe, can you be serious-” He cuts me off immediately, head shaking side to side as he shushes me with his finger. My face scrunches up at the feeling of the digit against my lips and I jerk my head back instinctively. 

“Don’t! Don’t talk when I’m talking…” Rafe’s patience is wearing thin, the edge on his voice only becoming stronger as he continues speaking. He clears his throat before continuing. “I’m not a bitch, alright? So, when I tell you to do something, you don’t question it. We’re gonna do what I want now, because everything isn’t about you all the time.”

He leans in close, so close that our noses brush against each other and I feel his breath against my glossy lips. I could feel my heart pumping blood through my body so quickly that I was sure my veins would burst open right then. I’m sure he could hear it, that he could feel it in the wrist that was trapped in his hand. 

“So, why don’t you ask me what I want?” He says quietly, each word falling against my lips warmly.

I don’t say anything for a few seconds, mind working hard to deliver the words to my mouth. It was hard for me to function with him pressed up against me like this. It always has been, and this was no different.

“What…” My voice sounds meek, barely audible. I clear my throat of the pathetic sound. “What do you want?” It sounds stronger this time, but I still feel pathetic for giving in so easily.

“What I want…” Rafe stresses the word just barely. “What I want is for you to be a good girlfriend, because I’ve been very good to you. I do so much for you. You can start by saying ‘thank you.’”

My pride wants me to do anything but say those words, but I'd rather not take my chances with the barely stable man. If this were a month ago, I would have no problem telling him off, and while I’d gladly do it now, I wasn’t too sure I would come out unscathed. 

“Thank you.” I practically spit the words out and into his face. They are not sweet and soft like he wanted, though I doubt he expected that from me.

His head pulls back just a little and his tongue strikes against his teeth repeatedly to tsk at me. 

“I need more than that.” He says with a pout on his face. The hand that once held my wrist now finds my chin, the knuckles of his fingers lifting my face to force my eyes to meet his after then had fallen to the floor. “‘Thank you, Rafe. You do so much for me.’”

I could be sick any moment, every nerve in my body itching to say every word in the dictionary but the ones that just left his lips. My tongue felt heavy in my mouth, and I wasn’t sure if I could even move it to form the sentence on my own.

He could tell how much I hated this, a smile grazing his face as he watched me struggle to repeat after him.

Clearing my throat again, I inhale deeply before I allow myself to speak.

“Thank you, Rafe. You do so much for me.” I sounded much weaker than I had planned. I felt humiliated, wanting nothing more than to crawl back under the covers of the bed and fall asleep forever.

Rafe smiles smugly at my defeated, angry face and it makes me want to slap him again, fingers twitching at my side. 

“You’re welcome.” He says sweetly. Rafe releases me from his grasp at his own speed, hands dragging away from my waist at tortoise-like pace. His fingers graze past my bare skin, the cutouts on my side leaving me exposed to the elements of the man before me. 

He turns on his heel and walks towards the bed, hands reaching out for the small white purse I chucked onto the mattress haphazardly and forgot about. I take it out of his hands when he holds it out to me, the lightweight feeling of it only reminding me of its emptiness. I had nothing to put inside, no phone, no wallet. It was just another pretty accessory that made me feel more and more like I’m living in a dollhouse.

I follow Rafe out of the room, the sound of our shoes clashing as we walk down the stairs together. 

This was the first time I had been out of the house and gone further than the driveway. The security guard would always get a little twitchy when I got too close so I never tested my luck. I also had no idea where we were going, everything about the island unfamiliar to me.

The drive to wherever we were going felt like forever, nothing to distract me but the view of the sky above from the car window. Even that was boring, not a single cloud grazed the blue background, and the sun was beginning to burn my eyes. 

Rafe hadn’t said anything the entire drive, eyes buried deep in his phone as he busied himself with something that must have been of great importance. It was only when the driver called out his name that he raised his head. The car had been still for at least a minute and Rafe had made no moves to exit.

He steps out of the car with his phone in hand, shoving it into his pocket as he walks over to my side to open the door for me. He holds his hand to side my exit, the chivalrous gesture coming to him naturally.

“Thanks…” I mumble as I’m pulled out of the car. He hums softly in acknowledgement, door shutting behind us as he guides me to our destination.

It looked to be a yacht port, the long, wooden platforms extending into the water with luxury boats floating around them. My heels tap against the wood noisily as we approach the end of the dock, Rafe’s step falling in sync with mine. Rafe stops in front of a large boat, and I follow his lead.

I study the yacht in front of us for a brief moment. My father’s boat back home was a dwarf compared to this one.

Rafe guides me onto the boat first. I could feel him watching me worriedly as I stepped over the gap between the catamaran and the dock, surely concerned that I’d somehow slip and fall through the small space and drown in the water below. I clear the gap easily, free hand gripping the side of the boat to aid me in keeping my balance on the buoyant chunk of metal. I wait as he climbs on after me, curiously waiting for what he has planned.

I wanted for him to lead me as I wasn’t entirely sure where to go. He walks me to the inside of the boat, the black interior walls of the luxury craft contrasting the white exterior.

“I’ll be right back.” He says.

The blonde takes long strides to the back of the boat near the dock and kneels down to untie the ropes keeping it from floating away. I tear my eyes away from his back, deeply uninterested in the process and let my eyes travel around the boat instead.

He made me get dressed up to go sailing alone? This is what he wanted to do so badly?

Rolling my eyes, I set my practically empty bag down on the couch behind me and walk over to the bar directly adjacent. It was fully stocked with alcohol, not that I drank anyways. Instead of indulging in fermented liquid, I grab a water bottle from the small fridge hidden beneath the bar counter. I can hear Rafe climbing back up the boat, footsteps falling against the steps as he makes his way up to the top level of the boat.

I nearly fall over when the boat begins moving unexpectedly, extremely unprepared for the strong jerk of the vehicle pulling off from the dock. 

I stumble back to the couch where my purse lies and take a seat, far too unstable and inexperienced to wear heels on a moving boat. I kick them off and free my feet of the mildly uncomfortable shoes.

“Jesus Christ…” I grumble to myself. I push off the couch again once my feet are bare and take silent steps to the large wall of windows that surrounded the room. The dock gets smaller and smaller as Rafe steers further into the water, the other boats looking more like miniature replicas as we create distance between them and us.

We drive around for a while, the water practically empty besides Rafe and I. I stopped paying attention to the scenery outside at some point, the sight of the blue water and distant island from behind the tinted windows all blurring together in my eyes. It was when the outside stopped moving that I was snapped out of my trance.

I wasn’t sure how long the boat had been stopped, but it was long enough for Rafe to come back down the stairs. I didn't notice him standing there until he spoke, the sudden intrusion startling me.

“Beautiful view.” He says. My neck snaps towards his direction, the well dressed blonde standing at the bottom of the narrow staircase a few yards away. I wasn’t sure if he was talking about me or the view of the water. I didn't care to ask, instead turning to face the windows again. 

His footfalls reach my ears as he approaches, his strong aura falling closer to me with every stop. He stops right behind me, eyes sharing the view with me from over my head. 

“Yeah, I guess.” I reply dismissively. I’m met with silence after my response, the soft sounds of the water replacing our voices as we stand together in silence.

“Not as beautiful as my girl, though.” I can feel Rafe place his hands on my hips from his place behind me, his reflection in the dark windows showing his head tilting down slightly to place a kiss atop my head.  

The gesture was cute, but I felt much too conflicted to react. If this were a month ago, I would have melted into his arms. But now? I stand stiffly in his hands as his lips make contact with me for the first time in weeks. 

I’m sure he’s testing the waters with me, making sure that I’m not going to lash out against him for doing such a thing. I didn’t plan on it, if my lack of reaction was any indication. He takes that as permission to keep going, lips connecting with my ear and shoulder innocently as he his arms wrap around me completely. It was a position that he always found himself being in with me. I should have pushed him away, but I didn't.

“Come with me.” He releases me from his embrace, settling for my hand in his as he takes me out to the front of the boat. 

The water from here looks even brighter, the clear blue color of it is almost unreal to me. There was a bed-like seating area beneath the sun visor on the boat but Rafe walked past it, me following in tow due to our connected hands. He instead leads us to the net beds at the very front of the bow, water visible through the small holes of the intertwined rope.

I cringed when I saw it, feet planted firmly into the ground to stop any further movement. I wasn’t scared of the water, it’s not like I can’t see what’s beneath it and I can swim perfectly fine, but that doesn’t mean that I trust the nets to not break and drop me into the ocean unexpectedly. 

I look between Rafe and the net a couple of times before he finally gets the hint. He looks somewhat amused by my hesitancy, a light smile playing on his lips. He tugs me to the front anyways, his own bare feet landing on the firm rope bed as he waits for me to join him.

“You’ll be fine. You’ve been through worse.” I am unamused by the comment, not that he cares. He helps me onto the net, the material barely denting underneath the weight of the both of us. I lower myself next to him, deeply unsettled by the possibility of it breaking. “See? You’re fine.”

“Yeah…” I say softly. 

I wasn’t sure what else to say or how to strike up any conversation that wasn’t an argument. It was all we did now. To be honest, it was all we did before, too.

Rafe doesn’t notice my reluctance to speak, and if he does, he doesn’t say anything about it. Instead, we sit together in silence, the ocean breeze blowing against our skin as we take in the beautiful view. 

We sat there together for a while in silence, the usual tension between us paused as we allowed ourselves to be surrounded by the vast ocean. It was scenic, the way the sun sat above the island and the blue waters calmly crashed against the shore. I would have forgotten Rafe was there if he were not sitting so close to me. I could feel the net dip every time he would shift in his seat, his arm brushing up against mine when he would reach up to nervously pull at the cartilage of his ear. 

His anxiety was palpable, his constant fidgeting giving him away. I could feel him glance at me every so often, the feeling of his eyes boring into the side of my head far too strong to completely ignore. I’m sure if I leaned in close enough, I would be able to hear his heart hammering against his rib cage.

I said nothing despite being aware of it, eyes focused ahead on the island in the distance. If he wants to say something, he will.

Rafe was the first one to break the silence. 

“Riah.” Rafe calls my name softly. I hum in response, the noise barely audible. 

He looks conflicted. I watched him attentively, noticing the nervous chewing he was doing to his tongue, the way he kept fiddling with his fingers, cracking them over and over as he played with the family ring decorating his hand. His mind is clearly throwing around a million thoughts at the walls of his skull. 

“Do you…” He starts suddenly, eyes flickering back up to mine from his own hands. “You still–you still want to be with me, right?”

I heard the question loud and clear, though I didn't react due to my complete bewilderment. 

“What?” I freeze in my place, unsure if I’m even breathing anymore. If I play dead, maybe I can avoid answering. Maybe I was hallucinating from lack of outside socialization, from being locked in that white bedroom for days at a time with a bunch of crazy people.

I know I’m not going crazy when he repeats the question. He readjusts his position on the net bed to completely face me, his attention captured by my side profile.

“Do you still want to be with me?” He sounds more confident this time, the softness of his voice gone even though he still sounds a bit hesitant.

“That’s…a random question, isn't it?” A question that I was less than prepared to answer out of the blue like this.

“Can you answer it?” He sounds impatient, like he can tell that I don’t want to give him an answer. “Look at me.”

I don’t look at him, opting to keep my head facing forward. I felt ambushed by the sudden interrogation.

Did I want to be with him? I wasn’t sure what to say to that. If he had left on a whim without taking me with him, if I were still back home and had no idea where he disappeared to, then yes. I would want to be with him. I would miss him deeply; I would be thinking about his absence day and night. I’d be wondering why he left with zero contact so suddenly. 

However, that’s not the case. 

I am here on this island with him, by force no less. He is the reason I am not at home right now, why my friends and family probably think something terrible has happened to me. He took away any freedom I had, any autonomy. He completely disregarded everything I cared about, everything I wanted for my life.

Rafe is selfish. I knew that for a long time before we were together, everyone knew that. He‘s brash, violent, and has an addictive personality. His father has money and power, so he has money and power; something that makes him dangerous. He is manipulative and borderline abusive. Whatever complicated relationship he has with his father has clearly affected his personality in a negative way.

He was not known to be a kind person. Arrogant? He is every bit of that. Rude? He is every bit of that. But even knowing all of this, I still decided to become his girlfriend.

I saw something in him, something other than the worst parts of him that he put on display for everyone else. His vulnerability with me struck a chord in my heart. He is a deeply hurt individual, one that depended on acting out for attention. He was willing to change for me, and that made my heart constrict. 

Sure, I’m not pleased with him currently. I told him I hate him and I refused to acknowledge for days, but that was out of anger and frustration. I don’t actually hate him, we both were very aware of that, but I can’t be sure of what I do feel for him. There are so many things that go through my mind when I lay my eyes on him, so many emotions that pass through me and leave me wrecked in their wake.

After ripping me away from my home, treating me like I have no mind of my own, crossing boundaries that I didn’t even know had to be made, did he still deserve me? Any sane person would say no–even I would say no had you asked me before summer started. I think even now, in the moment that we sit on this boat together, I would say no. He doesn’t deserve me. I’m too good for him, and he’s not good for me. 

But do I still want to be with him? Do I still want to call him mine and be called his? Do I want him to hold me, to kiss me, to whisper in my ear and tell me sweet things that make me smile? Do I want him to call me his princess, to touch me in ways that make me burn hot and infest my insides with swarms of butterflies?

I’d be a liar if I said no.

“I don’t know.” Is what I choose to say instead. I’m not strong enough to look him in the eyes when I say it, sure that I will give myself away if I do. 

“What do you mean ‘you don’t know?’” Rafe responds almost immediately. 

“I mean I don’t know, Rafe.” I shake my head at him even though he can’t see my face completely.

“How do you not know if you still want me, Neriah?” He says as if I’ve caused him great offense.

“Rafe…” I sighed heavily, preparing myself for the conversation that was going to have to happen between us eventually. I reposition myself to face him completely, breath stolen away briefly by the gorgeous man in front of me. I swallow thickly, words floating around pointlessly in my brain as I attempt to explain myself.

He impatiently awaits my answer, body shoulders tense as he watches me fight myself for an answer. He brings his fingers to his mouth, teeth picking at the nail of his pinky.

“I…Rafe, you broke my trust in a way that I don’t think I can ever forgive you for.”

“I know that. I understand that Neriah, and I’m sorry.” He says. He seems sincere in his apologies, though he always does and half the time it never means anything. “I don’t think I could ever say sorry enough.”

“No, Rafe. There is no amount of sorrow that could ever fix this, because you truly don’t understand.” I want to feel angry but I can’t, not when he looks at me so sadly. “You hurt me, Rafe. You took me from my family, my home. You only care about what you want, what makes you happy. You don’t care about what makes me happy.”

“That’s not true-”

“Then why am I here, Rafe?” I cut him off exasperatedly. He says nothing to defend himself, already knowing that his answer would not work in his favor. “I’m here because you wanted me here. I didn’t come here on my own.”

Rafe says nothing, surprising me as he always has something to say. I take this as an invitation to keep going. Hesitantly, I reach out for his hand and wrap my fingers around it. He looks shocked that I’ve initiated contact, as it’s something I rarely ever did. His other hand places itself on top of mine, the warmth of his skin seeping into mine.

“Look.” My tongue pokes out to moisten my lips out of habit, the flavorless lip gloss sticky against the appendage. “I care about you. I am so, so angry at you, and I’m confused…When I look at you, I feel so many things, Rafe, but none of them are things that I should feel about you. I should hate you; I should want nothing to do with you because you took advantage of my trust in you. I shouldn’t miss you hugging me, or kissing me, or calling me your pretty girl. I shouldn’t but–but…I do.”

His focus is completely on me, hands gripping mine tightly as he listens to my words attentively. He looks both relieved and nervous, clearly unsure about where I’m going with my speech. I’m not even sure myself, the words just falling out of my mouth as I think them.

“I do, and I don’t know how to stop. But I also don’t know how I’m ever going to trust you again–if I will ever trust you again.” The tension between us has returned, the once clear air now stuffy with the feelings that we had buried before we left the house. I couldn’t stop the words from flowing out of my mouth and into his ears, but I think we both needed to hear it. “So to answer your question, Rafe, yes. Yes, I still want you.”

“You don’t know how much I needed to hear that, Neriah.” His hands release mine and fly up to cup my face gently. His thumbs run over my cheeks delicately, as if I’ll crack if he handles me too roughly. I reach towards his hands on my face and grab his wrists, my fingers circling the joint weakly. 

I can tell he wants that to be my final answer, but nothing is ever that simple. He needed to hear everything that I had to say, whether he accepted it or not.

“Yes, I still want you.” I repeat softly. Rafe’s eyes are deep, drowning in them would be no different than falling in the water below. He could easily trap me with them, keep me with him for the rest of eternity, but I force myself to hold them with my own. “But I can’t sit here and tell you that things can be the same. I can’t let you call me yours, I can’t play house with you and pretend everything is okay just because I still want you. I can’t feed into whatever fantasy led you to bring me here in the first place, Rafe. I just…I just can’t.”

I pull his hands away from my face and place them back in his own lap gently. I stand from my seated position and return to the inside of the boat, leaving him outside on the net to allow him time to process my words. 

My feet carry me to the stairs leading to the top of the catamaran. I need to put physical distance between him and I, sure that one of us will do something we shouldn’t if I didn’t. The tension was suffocating. I barely seat myself on the couch at the top of the boat before I hear Rafe storming after me, his violent footsteps loud and just barely rocking the boat.

“Neriah, please.” Rafe stops a few inches in front of me, an expression of desperation on his face. His voice is pleading, almost pathetic as he says my name. “Please, please. I’m so sorry, please don’t do this to me.”

“Rafe, I’m not doing anything to you. I just–I can’t right now.” 

He begins pacing around the small space, hands grabbing at the non-existent hair on his head. His fingers ball up into his palms, the newly formed fists used to hit the sides of his skull repeatedly as he walks back and forth. 

“No, no, no...” He mumbles to himself as he walks. “I’m so stupid. I’m so fucking stupid!”

I flinch at the sudden outburst. I didn’t know if I should get up and stop him from hurting himself, surely the beating he was giving his head could not be healthy. He stops his pacing and appears in front of me faster than I can blink.

“I–I know I fucked up, Neriah. I know that.” He says from his standing position. He looks down at my expressionless face as he tries to explain himself, hands now busying themselves with clasping and unclasping the watch decorating his wrist. “What we did to you, what–what I did to you, was wrong. It wasn’t right, I know. But I can make it right–I promise I can make things right.”

I shake my head at him, lips pressing together as I watch him shift from foot to foot nervously.

“No, Rafe. You can’t make this right, because nothing about this is right.”

I nearly shoot up out of the chair when he drops to his knees in front of me. He grabs my hands in his tightly, the grip leaving my fingers immobile. I froze in my spot, unsure of what exactly to do in this situation. It’s like he flipped a switch, his semi-calm demeanor now replaced by a desperate grasp at my forgiveness.

“Please!” He yells desperately. Tears well in his eyes faster than he can blink them away. “Please, Neriah, you’re all I have. I–I don’t know what to do without you.”

The display was making me both deeply uncomfortable and pitiful. I’ve never seen him like this, and I wasn’t sure how to react. It felt like a disproportionate reaction to what I told him, but I can’t think of a time where he hasn’t overreacted to anything that even slightly upset him.

“Rafe, please get off the floor.” I hated when he freaked out. The only way to stop it was to give him what he wanted.

“Neriah, baby, I’m so sorry.” He brings my hands to his mouth and places soft kisses onto the skin. “I’m so, so sorry. I–I should have never done this to you, you’re right. I’m selfish and–and I’m a liar, and I hurt you and I’m so stupid for that. I was trying, I was really trying to be good for you. Better for you.”

He releases my hands and opts for wrapping his arms around me, his face pressed into my stomach firmly as he holds me tightly against him. My hands push at his shoulders, body twisting to escape his hold but he doesn’t budge.

“Rafe, you’re being dramatic. You shouldn’t have expected anything different.” I say annoyedly. “Get off me, you’re embarrassing yourself.”

“I don’t care!” I feel the vibration of his yelling through my dress, his voice refracting off my stomach. The tears that were welling up in his eyes just moments ago were beginning to fall and seep through the thin fabric of my dress. “I love you so much, you don’t understand. I’ve been such a horrible boyfriend to you, but I love you more than anything. I’m such…I’m such a shitty person, I know, but I’m trying. I expect you to hate me, I expect you to want nothing to do with me and I deserve all that, alright? Trust me, I know.”

He had an iron grip on me, his biceps flexing against me as he held me like I’m going to disappear. I’d never seen a grown man look so pathetic in my life. I wanted to push him off me and be done with it, but I can’t help but feel a little bad.

“But please…” Rafe says again. He pulls his head away from my torso to look up at me, face damp with tears and red from the heat of emotion. “I don’t need anyone else but you. I don’t want anyone else but you, I never have. I’m so alone without you, Neriah. Please just give me another chance.”

“I’ve given you more than enough chances, Rafe.” 

“So what’s one more?” His eyes are big and glassy, and the sight of him like this makes it hard to stand my ground. 

“One more chance is everything, Rafe.” I say firmly. “If I give you one more chance, then you’ll ask for another, and another. You don’t even deserve another chance right now; you’ve done nothing to earn it.”

“Then I will!” The blonde exclaims. “I’ll–I’ll do anything. I’d do anything for you, just like I said. I meant that. Just–please, Neriah. I’m begging you.”

This is the most powerless I’ve ever seen, him and it was truly a sight to see. While I was slightly annoyed, I can’t say the image of him on his knees begging for my forgiveness wouldn’t be a core memory of mine. 

“Please don’t give up on me. Don’t give up on us.” He looks truly broken, heart bleeding red on his sleeve as the shattered pieces fall out of his eyes and drip onto my lap. “Everyone always gives up on me. I want us to be different…I need us to be different.”

I say nothing, feeling slightly overwhelmed by everything. It was so difficult for me to say no to him, especially when he was like this. It’s how I ended up here in the first place. I knew myself well, and I knew if I spoke, I would say something that would land me in the place of the textbook definition of the word ‘idiot.’

It was just this morning that he practically humiliated me for his own pleasure, a blatant display of his power over me in that moment. 

But how could it be easy for me to reject him when he sits here on his knees before me, so desperate for my mercy? He looked like a broken, lost boy, so distraught at the thought of losing me.

It was hard for me to not sympathize with him. While it is his responsibility to change, it isn’t his fault that act the way he does. His father is a nasty man, one that would let his own son take the fall for a crime he committed. One that would berate him, neglect him, and abuse him for not being the perfect human. How else could Rafe turn out in an environment like that? When you look up to a man that hurts people to get what he wants and flaunts his riches for influence, how could you know being like him is wrong without someone guiding you to be different? 

I was the person that’s supposed to help him be different. I’m supposed to be there for him while he finds himself. What would happen if I gave up on him? 

I should be worried about my own safety rather than his well-being, but I can’t. I was fine, both physically and mentally for the most part. Sure, I’m pissed at him, but simply due to the principle of it all. In no case is kidnapping and drugging okay. But him? He was clearly not okay. He obviously needed help, and he had no one here that was willing to help him. No one had ever tried to help him, and he needed me.

Besides, we were on an island by ourselves in the middle of the Caribbean. How long could I keep this up? We live together and will be for God knows how long. I’d be a fool to believe that I could continue to ignore him for the entire time we’re here, especially when my resolve had already been cracking for a few days.

“Rafe…” I wasn’t sure how to rationalize my decision out loud, sure that I’d sound like a crazy person if I heard myself verbalize my thoughts. My hands go to cup his head, thumbs moving softly across his face to wipe away the fresh tears that were still falling. He leaned into my touch, face hot against my palms. 

“Don’t make me regret this.”

Rafe’s wrecked eyes light up so bright I’m nearly blinded by the swift change. He grabs the hands that rested against the side of his face and places soft pecks against them, his head turning to cover them in countless kisses. I stand up from my seat and he follows after me, rising from his place on the ground, he hunches over to remain eye level with me. 

We switch positions, my face now in his hands as his tear-stained face leans in close. He looked completely smitten with me, something he admitted to being himself just a few minutes ago, eyes sparkling with heart shaped reflections of me. 

“You won’t. I promise you won’t.” He says, minty breath softly hitting my face as he speaks. He studies my face adoringly, drinking in my features like a man dehydrated.

I could feel him leaning into me, lips brushing against mine for just a second before I pulled away in a moment of hesitancy. 

“I’m serious, Rafe.” My voice is soft, eyes darting all over his face warily. His head nods rapidly, one hand moving from the side of my face to tuck a braid behind my ear.

“I know, I know…” 

This time I lean in, glossy lips pressing against his sweetly and hesitantly and pulling away before I can properly feel the warmth of his lips. The evidence of my juvenile peck is left behind on his mouth, lips stained a clear pink from the color on my own. I go to wipe it away, but he blocks it, tongue poking out to collect the residue. 

“What am I gonna do with you?” I say. Rafe smiles at me, pearly white teeth giving me a show. One of his hands leaves my face and finds home on my back to pull me closer. 

“Good things, I hope.” His bottom lip falls captive to the same teeth he used to smile at me with. He looks so entranced with me, unable to escape my features as he examines them for the hundredth time like it’s the first. “God, I’m so in love with you.”

He initiates contact between our lips this time, the hesitancy that I had nowhere to be found in his kiss. It’s gentle but firm, cushiony lips capturing mine with a confidence that I definitely lacked. I felt like I could ascend at that moment. I missed the familiar feeling of his lips against mine, the feeling of him holding me close while I was left breathless in his wake.

The kiss is sweet and rhythmic, the two of us basking in the feeling as we hold each other close.

[weer02]

Here's some of Max's outfits in chapters of my fic "Ambivalence":

I haven't drawn in ages (in 2 years to be exact) and kinda gave up on it, but lately as I saw so many amazing artworks here, I got inspired to draw something myself!

Fanfic outfits seemed like a perfect warm-up,  I chose Max first cause she's ✨the main character✨, but what she was wearing was described the most (I also added her outfit from chap20 which I'm working on rn).

I forgot how much fun drawing was... and I might do more of this.

Here's single pics for more detail:

and fanfic excerpts describing the outfits if anyone cares:

CHAPTER 4: "[...]She pulled on a long-sleeved shirt with a geometric deer print and a warmer, dark grey hoodie on top of it. She went ahead with her plan and started to dress up in more layers. She ran her hands through her hair, and gave up on doing makeup, even though she knew how awful she looked after taking a look in the mirror, her dark circles under eyes even more prominent these days." CHAPTER 7: " As they were slowly pacing through the junkyard, Max could feel the icy, November wind. She was wearing all black today, black jeans, boots that she found deep in her closet, and a black coat borrowed from Chloe"

CHAPTER 15: "[...]She dressed up — her outfit was a white buttoned up shirt with a navy-blue skirt that went down to her knee. She looked down at herself and was so uncomfortable, it all felt too tight and too formal for her, reminded her of some kind school uniform she would hate to wear. She also took the oversized black coat borrowed from Chloe, just to have something over the top and not feel cold. [...] she couldn't bear looking at herself, she looked awful. Dark circles under her eyes from chronic lack of sleep, her bangs covering her eyes and hair overgrown to the point it almost reached her shoulders.[...]"

CHAPTER 18: "(the dress) was pale pink, reached below her knee, and didn't have any leg slits. It had short sleeves, because she didn't want showed off shoulders, and was plain, because she didn't want to draw much attention with lots of fabric and sparkly sequins. [...] She also had shoes of a matching color with a two inch heel, as anything higher than that she had tried on made her trip within the first step. She wore a thin silver chain necklace and a flower corsage on her wrist. [...] she took a look in the mirror and almost didn't recognize herself in the layers of makeup she had on her face. She never tried to do it before, because she was too self conscious about heavier makeup, and by heavier she meant what she had on right now, smoky eye shadow and a dusty pink lipstick."

"[...]She smiled at the thought, catching a glimpse of her expression it in the mirror. She realized she was wearing the same white shirt she had worn at the trial, but it didn't make her uncomfortable anymore, she paired it with black jeans and it surely felt more like her." CHAPTER 20: "November had already started and temperatures began to decrease, so Max pulled out a beige knitted sweater from her wardrobe, one she found in the boxes of things she didn't take to dorms. She wore it under her recently thrifted, oversized brown hoodie, and paired it with the usual blue jeans. She changed the black converse into a pair of brown boots to not get drenched in the puddles of rain."

[liketwoswansinbalance]

What's your fashion sense and style like? How do you do your hair? How do you like to dress?

I'm really fond of classic styles, often with features like high collars, smooth textures, sharp structured forms, flouncy sleeves, tight shirt cuffs, and ribbing, sometimes. I own multiple pairs of dark, short and tall boots, most of them black. Also, I prefer earrings and rings over necklaces or bracelets. I like "static" jewelry over what I call "motion" jewelry, which dangles and clinks noisily—it doesn't stay put, and thus, can distract me.

I'm drawn toward the dark academia aesthetic, but I don't like beige or any browns in most cases, so I tend to wear colder black, white, greys, and blues, and some other colors. I'm not the most well-versed in fashion, but I've done a little research and apparently, I love "jewel tones."

And because I feel like I have to specify at this point: no, those decisions were (mostly) not because of Rafal. There is another, equally silly or improbable reason.

Blue was already my favorite color at some point, but that sort of cemented when, probably, in the seventh grade or so, I read the Divergent series. I will fully admit that I am a coward, so I related more to the Erudite, partly-corrupt academics that wore blue, than the Dauntless, daredevils in black, very similar archetype as the Nevers in SGE, but even more rollicking and hedonistic. There's even a trope that could be dangerous, if it were misinterpreted by audiences and carried over into their real life belief systems.

The main bone I have to pick with that series, even if I love(d) it, is why do the "smart ones" always have to be the villains? I'm thankful for byronic heroes and the modern anti-hero—thank you commercial fiction! It's given people who identify with archetypes like those a more variegated landscape of morally-grey characters to relate to. Regardless, I did a search and the answer to the villainy question is American anti-intellectualism. Which, to save us time, no comment... for now.

Back to the point—I looked up the "blue enhances intellectual performance" message in the trilogy and apparently, it was founded on real-world studies around test performance! And it turned out that red has the opposite effect on the mind. It is not calming, can raise your heart rate, and could make you more avoidant of easy questions while taking a test, and that's why I have very little red in my wardrobe. And I'm not particularly superstitious, and have largely grown out of it, but I did have a phase during which I refused to wear red if I had a test at school.

During everyday life, I dress much more casually, in regular, often solid-colored shirts, sweaters, or jackets with high collars. I tend to like leggings and slacks more than jeans. Though, I got a black trench coat because detective fashion inspired me, and someday, I want to get a Shakespearean era top, like an actual doublet or jerkin, and dress up on Halloween or World Poetry Day, if I ever get the appropriate opportunity.

My current favorite shirt is probably this solid, brocade/damask-patterned, long-sleeved shirt in deep royal and midnight blues, and I've yet to find others like it. It was a gift from my music teacher because a friend gave it to her, and I guess she didn't like it that much, and decided to give it to me because I once complimented it. Very nice of her.

I don't usually have the occasion to dress up. Yet, in my opinion, the coolest shirt I've bought to date is a black, not-quite-a-poet's-shirt shirt with translucent sleeves. The sleeves are frilled and drape a little down at the cuffs. So far, I've only gotten the chance to wear it once, when I went on a humanities field trip to the opera. That made me feel so cool.

Furthermore, while I like crisp, elegant, muted, sleek, angular things usually, the inverse is also true: I don't like anything that screams "modernity," bulbous or platform shoes, or baggy silhouettes, at least, not on myself. I'm not a fan of sweatshirts, probably because of the modernity and because I don't like drawstrings or pullovers in general. So, most of my sweaters have zippers, buttons, or other closures—like, how inefficient (or really just bothersome, to me, as I can find a reason to complain about anything being inconvenient or not ideal) is it to have to pull off an article of clothing and have it end up inside-out?

I've wanted to learn to do my own makeup, but I haven't had the time lately, and generally speaking, I believe I'd have time for more deliberate fashion aside from just having ideas, only if I gave up something else, and that's not happening. Or, if I were able to plug into the wall and charge, instead of going through the motions of sleeping or eating—alas, the human species lacks that ability. It would be less work and thought, not having to eat but being able to choose when to. Though, I usually almost never sense hunger or dehydration, so that already "helps."

Oh right, since we're still on the topic of fashion, that reminds me: I never mentioned that the Rafal-has-duplicate-pairs-of socks-for-efficiency headcanon I wrote the other day was inspired by how I shop, haha.

What's left to answer? Well, my hair is one of the "problems" I have. I have long hair because I don't really like short haircuts, and it's straight and insanely oily. I should wash it possibly everyday or every other day, but literally, I don't have the time or the will to do so, and mostly tie it into a ponytail. Very infrequently, I curl it, but I don't have time for that either.

This was an entertaining one. Thanks for the ask.

[the-fiction-witch]

8th Corn Maze

Media The Maze Runner AU

Character Newt

Couple Newt X Reader

Rating Sweet

Halloween Day 8

I sat in my car driving through the endless madness of the rabbit warren of houses, until I spotted him. Newt stood by the kerb in his dirty white sneakers, brown pants, a bright orange shirt and his usual dirty white zip-up hoodie. He saw my car and happily waved so I pulled up beside him, he reached for my door but I shuffled the car forward making him roll his eyes. He tried again to get the door and I did it again. "Love!" he complained "Alright" I laughed letting him climb in "Hi love" He smiled as he sat down and gave me a kiss "Hello," I giggled "Ready to go?" "Absolutely" he smiled "I thought you were going to dress up?" I asked as I drove "I did," "Did you?" "I'm wearing pants, and a button-down" "We're going to the pumpkin patch" "Yeah? My shirt is orange. That's fall-ish" "Alright" I chuckled "You look beautiful though love" He smiled "Thank you very much Newt" I smiled glancing down at my cute little outfit with striped tights, a fluffy beige jumper and my brown pinafore. I drove us out to the pumpkin patch luckily it wasn't particularly busy. "Right Let's find somewhere cute" He smiled holding my hand, and we headed inside for a while just wondering around the pumpkin patch stopping every so often to take cute pictures of both the patch and of us using the patch as a backdrop "I'm coming, I'm coming" he says setting his phone up on a pumpkin tossing his hoodie to the side before coming over and giving me a cuddle for some cute Halloween and fall pictures "I'm terrible at posing where do I put my hands?" "Uhh put one on my waist" I told him moving his hand around me a little tighter

"Ohh hi love" "Hi," "what about this hand?" "Uhh in your pocket?" "Ohh yeah, good idea" He nodded as we took more cute pictures even getting a sweet kiss "ohh newt! Hand." I complained as his hand had migrated from my waist down until his hand was taking a grip of my butt "What? It keeps my hand out the way and it's not in the picture" "Alright picture time over" "Awwww fine" he pouts "You wanna pick pumpkins to carve?" "Yes, but… can we go in the corn maze first?" "Pick pumpkins and put them in the car then go in the maze by the time we get out you're feet will hurt" "That's a good point, alright let's go I already have a pumpkin picked out" he smiled excitedly so we grabbed our stuff and headed back picking out a nice pumpkin out to crave in a few days, we paid and put our pumpkins in the back of my car on a blanket. "Maze?" "We can go in the corn maze now, so long as we don't get lost" "We won't get lost, I'll guide us through love," He said We had to get an emergency map from the place we paid for our pumpkins just in case we got badly lost and so he could note down that we went in there to account for if we hadn't come back out by closing time But of course

"We don't need a map! I can lead us through no problem" Newt said as he headed inside "You say so" I shrug putting the map in my pocket and following him he took my hand and we headed through the tall corn maze "This way!" he says picking a direction and tugging me through with him, and it didn't take long for us to get lost "Newt we could just-" "I'm not checking the map! I can do this." "Newt, sweetie. It's getting late" "… no! I can do this! I can be a man and lead my girlfriend to safety" I took the map from my pocket secretly checking it "Left would be a good idea" I hinted shoving it back in my pocket before he noticed "Yeah! left lets go!" I did my best to hint or suggest as best I could using the map but giving him the feeling he could do it himself until finally we found the exit "We did it! We finally did it! and without using the map!" He yelled excitedly as we escaped the maze "Ahh there you two are, I was about to send a search party out" the man laughed "We did it, what do we win?!" "Here you go" he said handing Newt two small toffee sweets "Have a good night" He said heading away "Ohh" I sighed admittedly even I was disappointed and Newt looked utterly heartbroken "You wanna go get McDonald's as a better reward?" "We can?" "Of course," I smiled taking my toffee and heading to the car tugging him with me "Can we get ice cream?" "As much ice cream as you like Newtie"

[lillywillow]

I posted 552 times in 2022

That's 274 more posts than 2021!

55 posts created (10%)

497 posts reblogged (90%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@caplanbuckybarnes

@lexiepiper

@jobean12-blog

@alrightythenbabe

@nana1000night

I tagged 29 of my posts in 2022

#marvel - 22 posts

#marvel fanfiction - 20 posts

#bucky barnes - 18 posts

#marvel one shot - 17 posts

#bucky barnes x reader - 16 posts

#bbb2022 - 14 posts

#buckybarnesbingo2022 - 11 posts

#fluff - 6 posts

#james buchanan barnes - 5 posts

#steve rogers - 5 posts

Longest Tag: 31 characters

#birthday writing challenge 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Aphrodite

Summary: You feel uncomfortable in everything you own. Luckily, your boyfriend’s jacket fits you perfectly

 Written for: @buckybarnesbingo

 Words: 1261

 Square Filled: U4- Boyfriend Jacket

 Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Plus Sized!Female Reader  

 Warnings: Body issues, mild adult themes

 For a while now, you had been feeling uncomfortable in your clothes. Everything you put on felt tight or twisted up in all the wrong places but ever since you started stealing Bucky’s jacket, those things didn’t matter. Whenever you were wearing it, you felt so much better. The warmth you felt didn’t just come from the garment itself but whenever Bucky caught you in it. Feeling his eyes on you made you feel confident, beautiful and loved. Bucky told you how much he adored seeing you in it and how gorgeous he thought you were. You loved that man so much.

…

 You were in the kitchen wearing Bucky’s jacket, grabbing yourself a snack.

 “Don’t you think it’s time you gave your poor boyfriend his jacket back?” Nat mused from behind you.

 “Nope. Mine now,” you grinned. “Besides, it’s the only thing that fits me nowadays…”

 “If you want, I can take you shopping,” Nat offered.

 “Thanks, Nat, but I think I’ll pass,” you sighed, sitting down to eat.

 “Everything alright?” Nat asked, picking up on something in your voice.

 “I don’t really like clothes shopping. The last time I went, I nearly got stuck in something and almost burst into tears in the dressing room… The salespeople always make me feel so insecure and forget about buying pretty underwear. They all seem to think that if you’re beyond a certain size, you don’t deserve anything outside of plain white, black or beige…”

 Bucky heard your every word. It hurt him to think that you felt this way. He wished that he could take every flaw you saw in yourself and turn them into how he saw you.

 “You know, Nat… Whenever I wear Bucky’s jacket, all of that goes away. It smells like him and it feels like he’s hugging me… Whenever he looks at me in his jacket, it makes me feel… like I’m the only woman in the world that matters to him. Some days, I can’t believe that Adonis chose me…”

 Bucky walked up behind you and kissed the top of your head.

 “Hi, beautiful,” he smiled, pecking your lips.

 “Hi, handsome. We were just talking about you.”

 “Really? Nothing bad I hope,” he smirked, like he hadn’t just been listening in.

 “I was just telling Nat how lucky I am to have a boyfriend like you.”

 Bucky kissed you deeply, sending butterflies to the pit of your stomach. It was one of those kisses that took your breath away and made you glad to be a woman... specifically Bucky’s woman.

 “Have I told you how gorgeous you look in my jacket?” he panted when he pulled away.

 “Not today,” you purred.

 “Well let’s fix that…”

 Bucky kissed you again, pulling you close to his body.

 “Guys, this is a kitchen. People eat here,” Nat teased.

 You felt the heat rush to your face as you pulled away.

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114 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

#4

Childhood Friends

Summary: When you moved to San Fransisco for a new job, you bumped into the last person you ever thought you would see again; your long-lost childhood companion Eddie Brock

 Word Count: 1118

 Pairings: Eddie Brock x Chubby!Female Reader

 Warnings: Some body issues, fluff, mild swear words

 A/N: Requested by a wonderful Nonnie

 When you were a child, your best friend was a boy named Eddie Brock. You did everything together. When you were a teenager, your family moved away, leaving you heartbroken but on your very last day in town, you and Eddie went to a carnival where he won you a stuffed panda. Sadly, over the years, you lost touch with your friend but that little teddy bear was your most prized possession.

…

 It was a brisk San Fransisco morning and you were getting a coffee to energise yourself before a busy day of carting boxes into your new apartment. You were so lost in your own thoughts that you failed to see the person standing behind you and you collided with them.

 “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see where I was going and I…”

 “Y/N? Is that you?”

 It took you a few minutes to figure out who this mystery man was.

 “Eddie? Eddie Brock?”

 He grinned and nodded. You couldn’t hold back the squeal of delight as you threw your arms around him.

 “I can’t believe it’s really you. What are you doing here?” Eddie asked.

 “I live here now. I was just getting coffee…”

 You felt heat flood your face as you looked at the mess you had made on Eddie’s shirt.

 “I’ll pay for that to be washed…”

 “Don’t worry about it,” he shrugged. “So, do you need any help moving or are you still getting settled in?”

 “As I was saying, I was just on my way up to move boxes,” you went on to explain.

 “I’m not doing anything right now. I could give you a hand,” he offered.

 “No, no, I couldn’t, especially after I spilled coffee all over you,” you protested.

 “Please, it’s the least I could do for an old friend. We could get to know each other again and catch up,” he smiled.

…

 It took you a while but with Eddie’s help, you soon had all of your boxes of belongings inside your new apartment and you were sure without his help it would have taken you longer. As you worked, you caught up Eddie’s life since you left and you told him about yours. When he left, you couldn’t help feeling a spark between the two of you. Before you left, you thought that Eddie would be your first boyfriend but that never happened. It didn’t help that he had grown into such an attractive adult. You had dated here and there but you could never find someone quite like Eddie. Another thing that affected your dating life was your insecurities about your looks. Between the stresses of daily life and a medical condition, you had put on a bit of weight. It wasn’t the weight itself that bothered you so much as it was the jerks who teased you about it. You just wished you could find someone who didn’t care about the superficial stuff. Maybe even someone like Eddie.

…

 It had taken some time to get your apartment just the way you wanted it but once the furniture was in place (with a little help from Eddie) and all your homey touches had been arranged, you invited Eddie over for a celebratory dinner. It was just over six when Eddie arrived carrying a small potted flower.

 “I got you a house warming present,” he smiled.

 “Aw, thank you. That’s so thoughtful,” you smiled back. “Come in and make yourself comfortable.”

 As you went to put the plant near your kitchen window, Eddie looked around your home.

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130 notes - Posted July 7, 2022

#3

The Devil’s Fever

Summary: When Matt gets sick, you’re there to take care of him

 Word Count: 1300

 Pairings: Matt Murdock x Reader

 Warnings: Mild swear words, mentions/ symptoms of flu

 It was inevitable that Matt would eventually get sick. He spent all night out in the cold, in the freezing rain, getting drenched to the bone, come home and not even changed out of his wet clothes. The morning after one such night, Matt could feel a little scratchiness at the back of his throat but decided to walk it off like he did so many things. By the time he got to the office, a headache had set in and his muscles were beginning to ache (although that could just be from the beating he took, he guessed).

 “Hey, Foggy,” Matt greeted, taking a seat at his desk. “What’s our first case?”

 “Our first case is… woah, you look like crap,” Foggy remarked, immediately once he saw Matt’s condition, the statement coming from a place of concern.

 It wasn’t just the bruises that caught Foggy’s attention but there was just something off about Matt’s general appearance that just wasn’t right.

 “Thanks, man,” Matt scoffed, shrugging off the comment. He knew Foggy meant well.

 “Are you sure you don’t just wanna stay home, man?” Foggy asked.

 “Nah, I’ll be fine,” Matt waved off.

 “Okay, but if you’re not feeling good, you can go home, okay?”

 “I’ll be fine, Foggy. Really,” he tried to reassure.

 Matt was not fine. As the day ticked by, he was getting progressively worse. Foggy was so wrapped up in his own work, he didn’t notice how bad his friend’s condition was. Matt tried to focus on his work but he couldn’t concentrate. His clothes felt like sandpaper on his skin and the world he could hear outside was practically screaming at him. By midmorning, he was beginning to sweat.

 “Morning, guys. I brought coffee,” you cheerfully greeted.

 “Thanks, Y/N. You’re a life saver,” Foggy grinned, taking the foam cup from your hand.

 You smiled back until you saw your boyfriend slumped at his desk and rushed over to him.

 “Matt? Matty, baby, talk to me,” you implored, carefully lifting his chin.

 His skin was hot and clammy.

 “’m fine,” he mumbled.

 You removed his glasses and looked into his eyes, seeing they were glassy and bloodshot.

 “You’re not fine, you’re sick,” you stated, helping him get up from his desk. “Foggy, I’m going to take Matt home.”

 “Go right ahead, Y/N. Hope you feel better soon,” Foggy said.

 Matt wanted to give some smart reply and to argue that he wasn’t sick but his head was too clouded to even think straight. He let you take him back home.

…

 As soon you arrived at Matt’s place, you got him changed into something more comfortable than his suit and got him into bed.

 “You get some rest and I’ll go out and some supplies, okay?”

 You were expecting Matt to argue and put up a fight but instead, he laid down and went to sleep which only proved to you how much this illness had taken out of him.

…

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169 notes - Posted July 16, 2022

#2

Twice The Mate

Summary: Being an important alpha of the town came with a lot of expectations, especially when it came to choosing the right mate. Perhaps you may even find two…

 Word Count: 1576

 Pairings: Alpha!Bucky x AlphaFemale!Reader x Alpha!Steve

 Warnings: A/B/O dynamics, mild adult themes, Alpha Steve and Bucky

A/N: This is my first time writing one of these types of fics and it was weirdly inspired by a documentary on cassowaries (big Australian birds that can kick a grown man to the curb). I also want to thank @jobean12-blog and @navybrat817 for some of their advice (go check out their amazing works).

 Being a pillar of the community wasn’t an easy job but you strived to be as approachable as possible. Lately there had been a lot of pressure for you to choose a mate and continue your family legacy. It wasn’t just that easy. You didn’t want some soft little omega nor some mediocre beta… you wanted an alpha but one who fits your high standards.

 Wanting to take a break from your local duties, you decided to head to the pool to blow off some steam. As you were sunbaking, you relayed your to your best friend Nat.

 “Why don’t you pick Rumlow? He’s strong and not bad looking,” she suggested.

 You scoffed at the idea and rolled your eyes.

 “Because I’ve worked with him enough to know his type. If I picked him, the omegas in town wouldn’t stand a chance much less the rest of the community. I need an alpha who’s more than just strong and good looking. I need one who’s kind and cares about everyone and not just the other alphas…”

 Just then, one of the handsomest men walked into your line of vision. He was tall with blond hair, blue eyes and a muscular build. By the smell of him and the way he held himself, an alpha too.

 “Okay, is everyone wearing sunscreen?” he asked.

 It was only then did you realise the group of small children that he was being followed by, all wearing their water wings and other floatation devices for safety. They all answered with a chorus of “Yes, Mister Steve”, except for one little boy in the group. Rather than scold the boy for not doing as he was told, the teacher (whom you presumed was named Steve) knelt down and applied the sunscreen to the boy’s skin, explaining the importance of the act. Once that was done, he stood up and headed to the edge of the pool.

 “Everyone ready?” the instructor asked.

 “Ready!” the children cheered.

 On his count, they jumped into the water together, save for one little girl who stood shyly on the edge.

 “Come on, you can do it,” Steve gently encouraged.

 The girl shook her head.

 “I’m scared!” she cried.

 “I promise you I’ll catch you…”

 The girl contemplated it for a few moments before jumping into his waiting arms.

 “I did it!” she cheered.

 “You sure did!” he smiled.

 The man gently let the little girl go so she could join the rest of the class. The whole time, you could not take your eyes off him. His tone was ever kind to the children but firm when it needed to be and he encouraged them to try the tasks themselves, only stepping in if they were truly struggling. When the swim class was over, he dismissed the class cheerfully and went to get his towel. You knew you had to go and talk to him.

 “Hi,” you smiled.

 “Oh! H-hello. You’re, uh… Y/N, right? I’ve seen you around…”

 “That’s right. I was just watching you teach…”

 He became flustered which only helped to strengthen your resolve.

 “You must think it’s silly, an alpha teaching small children instead of doing something manly like protecting the town… My name is Steve, by the way…”

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229 notes - Posted May 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

That Darn Cat

Summary: When a white cat enters your life, she decides to adopt you as her secondary human.

 Word Count: 1355

 Pairings: Bucky x Reader

 Warnings: Fluff

Tagging some Bucky lovers: @jobean12-blog @buckysbirdie

 It was a pleasant spring morning. Wanting to take advantage of the nice weather you took your laptop out to your balcony to do some work. You worked for about an hour before deciding you needed to take a break from looking at your screen. With a stretch and a sigh, you just happened to look over at your neighbour’s adjoining balcony. That was when you noticed a white cat was sitting on a chair and staring at you intently.

 “Morning. Nice day, isn’t it?” you mused, not really expecting the cat to answer but chuckling when it let out a soft mew.

 The cat jumped up onto the table of the outdoor setting, onto the railing and over onto your side of the balcony.

 “Well, hello there. Did you want to come and introduce yourself?” you cooed as the cat sauntered over to you and rubbed itself against your leg.

 You couldn’t help but smile and pat her before placing her on your lap. The cat purred happily.

 “You’re a sweet thing, aren’t you?”

 “Alpine…” you heard a man’s voice call from inside the apartment next door.

 You stood up and carried the cat over to the fence, gently placing her on the table so she could go back the way she came.

 You sometimes caught glimpses of the gorgeous man who lived there but you had yet to meet him. You often wondered what he was like.

…

 Over the next few weeks, Alpine had been a regular visitor to your balcony and had gone as far as inviting herself into your apartment. You had gone as far as rearranging your balcony setting and leaving your door open a crack so she could come and go as she so pleased and had taken to calling her Babydoll. Not wanting to be a bad host to your feline guest, you had begun feeding her. You found she loved anything fish flavoured, had a tolerance for chicken but despised anything beef, turning her nose up in disgust at it. You quite enjoyed her company; it was like having a very chill girlfriend you could hang out with and vent to.

 One evening, you came home from one of the most boring dates you had ever been on. After biding your date goodbye, you walked in the door and found Alpine on your couch giving you one of the most judgmental looks you had ever seen a cat give.

 “What? Don’t give me that look. He was just a blind date a friend set me up with and I… I’m justifying myself to a cat,” you sighed, taking a seat next to Alpine who promptly jumped into your lap.

 “It wouldn’t have worked out anyway. The guy had no sense of humour and he was possibly one of the dullest people I have ever met. Plus, he was so cheap he wouldn’t let me order anything… If I were to meet someone, he’d have to kind, smart, funny… wouldn’t hurt if he were easy on the eyes,” you laughed, idly patting Alpine’s soft fur. “What about your owner? What’s he like? He single?”

 You only had small insights of your next-door neighbour but it gave you some inklings of the sort of man he was. Most Sunday mornings, he would sit on his balcony and drink his coffee. Sometimes you thought about going to talk with him but you felt too shy. He’d leave his door open and you could hear the music playing inside. He liked the old stuff; The Andrews Sisters, Frank Sinatra and Édith Piaf just to name a few. Alpine was so sweet and well cared for so it must mean he was a kind soul.

 “What do you think about ordering some dinner and watching a little tv, hm?"

…

 Forty minutes later, there was a knock on your door indicating your food had arrived. No sooner had you opened the door to collect your food, there was a huge boom of thunder and the power to the building went out. Alpine yowled in fright and took off out into the dark hallway. You quickly put the food on the table and grabbed your phone for a source of light. What if she got hurt or trampled on or what if some creepy weirdo tried to claim her? You couldn’t live with that on your conscience. As you chased after the white feline, you failed to notice Alpine’s true owner emerge from his apartment to also look for the cat. Fortunately, she hadn’t gotten too far away and you were able to catch up with her quickly.

 “Gotcha, Babydoll!” you exclaimed as you scooped her up in your arms.

 “What are you doing with my cat?”

 You turned to see the man you had spent weeks admiring.

 “Oh! You must be my neighbour. We haven’t formally met. I’m Y/N and for the last few weeks, your cat has been visiting me,” you explained.

 “I see… I’d been wondering where she’d getting to when she vanishes. Thought she may have been hiding,” he said, giving Alpine a scritch under the chin. “My name’s Bucky.”

 Alpine looked quite happy in your arms, smug almost. Her face seemed to say, “I like this human, father. May we keep them?”

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618 notes - Posted March 20, 2022

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[silentlysurrenderingeagle-blog]

Chapter 1: My Shiva: How we met

A time came when I thought I should be moving out of my comfortable bed, making a life for myself. I came to Mumbai from Kolkata. I had some savings from the previous startup. I bought a small boutique store in the suburbs. I bought a tiny 2BHK, all investments. I created my page on all social media platforms, hoping to promote it online. I knew I needed enough to survive a year without any profit.

But the expenses were too much for me. I was almost on the verge of calling my parents and telling them "Yes Baba. You were right. I failed again. Can you give me some money?". But I didn't. I pushed myself. Posted a roommate ad on my social media page. I heard the rents in Mumbai were high. The guy who has rented the place next to mine pays 35000 monthly for a similar 2BHK. It would not hurt to make 15000 per month by renting out the spare room.

I was new to the city. The city truly had its charm. Of course it was not Kolkata. But now when I think of it, the only thing that binds me to Kolkata were my people. My parents, my brother, my friends. I had no one in this strange city. One night, as I was scrolling through my timeline on Facebook, I saw Nids. She was my classmate in school. It was a picture of her standing on a clearway at Marine drive while I could see the waves crashing behind her.

A week later I received a reply from Nids. She wrote, "Hi Sree. I am in town. Come by. This is my number. Ping me. Let me share with you my address". My days were busy. But I was free in the evening. Most evenings were spent reading, cooking, chores and more chores. I hadn't met anyone familiar in years. I was excited, but hoped the address was close by. Though trains were an easy transport throughout the city, I was not familiar with trains. I would need a cab or an auto.

Almost immediately, she sent me her address. It was 15km from my apartment. Now, you should know something about women. We have stages of dilemma, especially when you have not dressed up in a while. First, everything should match. If you have not waxed your legs, you can't risk a short dress. If you have a heel you want to wear, you will have to get a bag and dress that matches it. Second, lack of motivation. So much energy goes in trying out clothes with shoes, in changing and changing till you find a perfect one for the occasion, but by then you are exhausted. Third, when you see a woman in her boxy tshirt and jeans, you should know that she could not succeed in getting a match. She wore the most comfortable clothes she could muster at the moment.

But I was motivated. After a year, I was finally meeting a friend, someone familiar. I didn't have to try hard to look good. She was a friend. She had seen me in two pony tails in school. Anything I wear would be better than that. And so I did. I wore my own brand, though my clothes had not yet become my brand. I have hardly sold 100 pieces since I opened my boutique. But it was one of my best. I wore a beige pant, paired it with a white short top, a grey blazer and a rose gold chain neckpiece to match all. I wore my rose gold watch and a brown pump heel. I was ready. I tied my hair in a knot. Applied lipstick blush and eyeliner, I was ready.

I was at the door. She texted that she would be on the 3rd floor. The door of her apartment was intricately designed in wood with a frosted glass panelling on the sides. I heard the door knob click from inside and as it opened, I saw a girl standing at the door. "Yes. Who do you want?" She said. I was startled. I thought I was meeting her alone. But I could clearly see this was a party. There were 10 people inside all seated around a small coffee table.

"Hi! I am Sneha. I am here to meet Nids, sorry Nidhi Sharma. She invited me"

Just then, from behind the door, a head peeped out.

"Hi Sree! Come in. It has been a long time"

She came forward and gave me a tight hug. Yes that's Nidhi, my childhood friend Nids. I remember we often discussed our life plans when we were young. I used to tell her, "Please. If you ever get married, don't invite me. I can't bear to have veg food at a friend's wedding." And sometimes " You know how I want to die? At the age of 80, on the laps of my husband with my forehead lined with sindoor and my grandchildren by my side. I would be smiling to them, a sign that I have lived my life to the fullest." On seeing her after so long all those memories came rushing back.

She took my hand and we entered her parlor. She introduced me to her guests. "Guys, meet Sree. I call her Sree. She is Sneha. She was my best friend in school." I took a place on the sofa. I placed my bag on the side, awkwardly. I was not expecting a bunch of strangers.

"Hi! Would you like a drink?" said one of her friends

"Yes. But I have to work tomorrow. So, I would like a glass of juice, please." But as I said this, I could hear my head telling me "Shut up!"

She chuckled. I wanted a place to dig a hole and bury myself out of embarrassment. Just then Nidhi came to my aid. "Riddhima, stop. She does not drink. Here. This is my favourite mocktail punch. Nothing fancy. Just some soda, fruits and cold drink". She was holding a glass with some transparent drink. I could see slices of pomegranate, apple and lemon beneath.

"Thank you." I took the glass.

"Come on. Give it a try"

I took a sip. It tasted like Sprite with fruits. Not bad.

"Guys, let's play. This is Game Night. We should play. Teams decided yet?" It was a man. He had a long canvas stand in his embrace. He set it down and smiled at his audience. That's when I saw him. My Shiva!

[nemo20-myparfumsmelllikegarlic]

The 2020-2025 fashion from someone that grew up in it

I’m a teen in my last year of high school and I want to make a more accurate guide to 2020s fashion and what was actually worse by everyday teens rather than what celebrity, fashion magazines or influencers want you to think. This will be a post with a slight Central Europe-eastern Europe -Balkan influence.

Just because this trends have appears and gone under many different names truly there have mostly been two groups. The first one is already well known from the late 2010 era.

1. The mainstream hypebeast

Even though more visible with the men the modern hypebeast is no longer a person passionate by black culture. The designer elements have become a staple of a certain high school group and are now more far in between. Usually the boys would have a srayground backpack or a designer or trapper T-shirt with off white shoes and bombardier pants, usually one at a time.

As with the mainstreams element of the 2020 hype beast most of the original items have been duped in low end stores and fast fashion stores as dupes that any teen could afford. So we see influence of this elements in the 2020-2025 period. The main one is overseized clothing. Grate examples are oversized T-shirts or pants like wide leg jeans seen on both genders equally. Boys would usually wear two oversized items of clothing as such hiding their body shape. Another element is cargo pants who later on will be combined with the wide leg pants by the alt kids.

For girls, one oversized item would be more commonly used like a large T-shirt and biker shorts. When we talk about this mix and match we can’t forget about the most important item of clothing in every 2020-2025 teen girls essentials, the crop top. Girls from this category will also wear elastin, tight dresses ruched in all the right areas to hide the fat.

Afterwords this group will form the gym bros. But actually even though the name would led you to think otherwise not the men were mostly affected by this change but the girls. Somewhere around 2022 the biggest trend for this category of girls will be those bell bottom yoga pants usually paired with the most important imens of 2020s fashion, the hoody and the crop top. Later on this will be exchange for the yoga pants puled all the way up so your botty shape is perfectly lined. The thing these two types of bottoms have in common is that they are always high waisted so you look as skinny as possible in them. The makeup is a more everyday version of the 2010 one. It has long lasting mat foundation with heavy contouring or blushing and nude lips. The eyes are more natural and the fake lashes and painted brows are gone.

The pre pandemic was quite pastel and muted in colors pastels were at the top. Right after in the pandemic we would see for around a year a slight usage rated neon colours and animal prints. This will quickly drop. The dominant shades of this five years will be black, gray and beige or warmer shades of brown and the occasional khaki but without the army print.

This crowd cares a lot about their shoes. It’s always wear Jordan’s or those off white wand with the fake tags.

2. Alt

There are two main alternative fashion looks. The coquette and gothic crowed who are two sides of the same coin. The only difference is their color palette. I will group both of this under the “ hello kitty girl” name as both are obsessed with Sanrio. The male version is an arty soft boy that wear denim jackets or colourful shirts or those smart dressed guys that always wear polo shirts. I don’t have much to say about the guys in this category they are very few all I can say is that they are always ww2 history enjoyers and edgy in all the ways.

The hello kitty girls hate each other which is very funny. The most popular haircut of this fashion duality is the wulfcut usually with bangs and accessorised with bows. All the help kitty girls listened to Lana del rey in middle school and are mentally unstable.Even though both groups wear corsets, girly dresses, bell bottom jeans, heavy jewels and bows as main accessories and chokers sometimes even in the colours of the other aesthetic. But their slight changes really separate them.

To be more precise coquette girls despise goths while the other group doesn’t really care about the other one’s existence. Hello kitty girls romantecize the past but in two diferent ways that hit each other in the head. Coquette girls are for me the same as cottage core. They like to wear shades of baige wear fake pearls and pink bows. Coquette girls wear bell bottom jeans flowy dresses and ruffles crop tops. They see books as props or accessories and will carry one with them everywhere. Their makeup is barely there because they want to look barely legal. They wear lip gloss in natural colours and mascara. Occasionally a winged eyeliner or beige eyeshadow because that is their favorit color ( because every normal person likes beige…). Only wears basic converse and the visco girl bag.

Goths differ from coquette girls mainly from attitude. They don’t really care what people believe about them and because of that they are the group most likely to thrift but also steal and be mean to your face. When it comes to accessories they wear way too many rings and at least two necklaces of which one has to be a rosary. The jewellery is usually silver or black compared to the coquettes gold. The main piece of clothing of the goth is the corset which is paired with a mini skirt or bell bottom jeans and on top a crop top with siren cups and the witch sleeve. The goths want to stand out so their makeup is very dark. The lipstick is in dark shades or the lips are contoured with black and then they make some kind of ombré with white in the middle. The eye liner (liquid) is overexagerated and up to the brow. They always wear boots or converse doesn’t matter the season.

From the goth and the new hype beast funny enough originated some kind of grunge kids around 2023. They wear Nike air force with wide leg cargo jeans in that dirty pant shade. That is paieted with an oversized band T-shirt a crop top or a sports bra and huge flanel shirts. The makeup is still raccoon with huge eyeliner.

Main items for the 2020-2025 look. The oversized T-shirt, large bottom pants and cargo pants, Minnie skirts and thight, ruched dresses, hoodies ( no zippers allowed), crop tops, yoga pants and sports bras, the hoodie with a boob window etc. Basketball shoes, be it Nike, converse or off white are the main footwear. For accessories is the hair theeth thing or the empty silver or gold chain. For girls extremely long hair or a wolf cut were the main haircuts usually with long nude acrylic nails. The makeup was nude with a lot of highlighter and brows without an arch.

[arvaelartoflife]

Autumn Basics

I would like to show I could not live without in autumn. This year's main color is black and grey, but I also included beige and some white, all of which are basic colors. Similar items serve me as the very core of my wardrobe - I can reach for them everyday for almost any occasions. Mixing them with non-essential essentials can give you bomb outfits.

All of these items go together, you can combine them the way you like, no need to worry that your look will not seem put together.

Let us see the items one-by-one, starting from bottom.

Shoes:

Kitten heel sock boots - I chose this boot to be my staple as it is really comfortable and if I need to dress up, I would not compromise my looks and comfort.

Nude Ballet flat or loafer - Again comfort and elegance in one, I have a beige velour loafer (a very soft material), one of the best investments I have ever made.

White trainers - If I feel that I want to look cool in the office, I would certainly go for a white trainer. It goes with everything!

Black loafer - When I wear these types of shoes with sheer black tights, it gives the outfit a very nice detail, it looks very elegant. Tailored Pants in the color scheme:

Black - Versatile piece, you can style it every way you can imagine.

Beige - If you want a pair of pants which shouts elegance and goes with every color, I would definitely go for a beige pair of elegant pants.

Grey - This color is absolutely in for this season. Soft sweaters in the color scheme:

Black

Beige

Grey The all-time staple:

White shirt - Should I say anything more about this? Cardigans

Stripy one - Stripes are hot this season, also very versatile piece.

Beige - A long cardigan can can hug you like a cozy blanket when the weather is really cold. Go for a color which goes for everything, my all-time favorite is beige. Blazers

Black - I chose a short black blazer this season, mine is echoing Chanel's style. Before purchasing it I would have never imagined how many times I would wear it, it was a great investment.

Beige - Timeless.

Grey - In season, and in office environment you almost cannot avoid having a grey blazer. I would actually recommend having a suit or set in grey Pants, blazer, skirt, all in one and from the same fabric. How many times I wore my set? I cannot even count! Coats

Black trench coat - I chose a black faux-leather trench coat, for the cool vibes. It is also very useful, as it is rain-proof. Really recommend having one.

Camel trench coat - Again, timeless.

[ofstormsandsaints]

You could do a post about Yui and her outfits when she was still living with her father in the church (along with some headcanons)? It's canon that Yui had a rather austere and humble life, so I'm guessing her clothes were always used or second hand.

It's longer than I expected-

Fashion Headcanon - a Yui Komori lookbook

Humble coquette meets the church girl roaming in a forest full of violets.

-Her colour palette is soft. So, so soft.

-Beige, white, pale pink, baby blue mixed with bits of faded navy blue and brown.

-Loves plaid pattern or those very delicate floral designs on clothes, colours slightly washed out, making everything cohesive.

-Doesn't mind vibrant colours in general. She finds beauty in many, many things but she knows that jewel shades will look garnish on her.

-Yui prefers when her clothes aren't too tight around her chest. Her tops are generally puff sleeved, off-shoulder with ruffles on the neckline to blur the shape of her torso.

-That, even before those fuckers would make her self-conscious about her chest. Pricks.

-When wearing tank tops or t-shirts, she would wear a cardigan or a wrap-up top that has subtle strips of white lace at the end of its sleeves.

-She's simply more confortable with showing her legs or her shoulders. For instance, she loves how her pale curls fall and brush the line of her shoulders. (but the diaboys too😔)

-Knitted mittens, square necklines, lacy lolita socks, vintage chiffon blouse embedded with little flowers, myosotis, daisies, stars of Bethlehem.

-She knows how to sew and to mend her clothes when it's needed. She is cautious with her belongings though.

-Wears second-hand clothes. Because life at the church was obviously more austere and Yui grew without the materialistic need to buy and own stuff just to see it piled up in her closet. Plus, she never wanted to appear spoiled rotten or anything.

-But she likes second hand clothes also because the fabric is soft. It's comforting for her to know that the clothes she owns now, had a life before.

-These grandma blouses with small embroidered details on the sleeves or on the collar ? Stan.

-Second hand fashion allowed her to explore a different sense of fashion - to create outfits that looked good on her and not trying to look like models in magazines. So you can find a sweet blending of reminiscent 2000s and 60s fashion in the way she dresses.

-Keeps her outfits simple and practical all in all, because she's known for being quite active.

-She cooks, cleans, helps the nuns in the garden or during charitable works.

-Therefore, she would never wear heels too high, skirts too long or too short.

-When going out to do some groceries, she always ends up looking at some shops, as there is something soothing for her in watching all these different clothes and shoes displayed behind the window. She doesn't buy anything, but she envies just a little bit the groups of girls who enter these shops, giggling and ready to buy something nice.

-No jeans or leather jackets like the girls of her age. Her father didn't allow her to wear those - he never even bought her clothes.

-Well. Not never never, but until very late, Seiji would only gift her books, stationary supplies, some tea...but never clothes, makeup or jewellery. This, combined with a certain solitude and the absence of a feminine figure in her life, Yui didn't have much choice but to observe a lot. She wanted to care about her appearance. She didn't know how at first.

-Interestingly, books and art influenced her style. Without even realising it, Yui would become the modern version of spring faerie, living a peaceful life in rhythm with the bell and the services.

-Spends hours making jewellery.

-The floral hair pins and the matching necklace? Her doing.

-She is crafty and loves doing activities that require patience and creativity, pearls glistening under the sun, tinkering with little hearts and stars. Nothing complicated. Just what she needs to give that graceful faerie twist to her outfit.

-She works like this, at her vanity or on a bench outside, in front of the garden for hours. Sewing or crafting the most precious details that no one except her will notice. She works until her eyes are tired and the tea remaining at the bottom of her cup is cold. But it is during time like this, that she feels the most a peace. The happiest.