#i’m trying to befriend him so i can eventually get him into a cage trap

[tahthetrickster]

well in nicer news. after several weeks of trying to show fiona’s enormous tomcat boyfriend that i’m a nice and safe person to be around, last night around supper fiona led him right up to me and i got to give him possibly his very first pets ever :)

[oven-thermometer]

Camp Ningyo Chapter 5

a/n: omg heyyyyy guys apologies my life fell apart after uploading my last chapter but i wanted to start writing my shitty gay fanfic again sooooo. This chapter is rlly short just to get me into the swing of things again but I swear ill try my best to write some more soon :)

warnings: none

w/c: 1.1k

Read on ao3 instead

Masterlist

Right after the strange human boy ran off, he was amused. After one day he was annoyed. After three, he was concerned. Overthinking fueled his anxiety as every possible horrible outcome flooded his mind. Had he told someone? Although the siren was confident he wouldn’t do something like that. Was he maybe in trouble? But surely he had weighed the risks of sneaking off every day and would’ve come to see him. Did he scare him off? That last question gave him pause. With all his might he couldn’t come up with a reason why it wouldn’t be true. He didn’t know the first thing about what humans considered frightening, and he didn’t pretend to. All he knew was how to trap their idiotic little minds in cages of songs and madness. 

But after seeing the human boy’s face again as the siren sat silently on that plush surface, all of those odd worries melted away. He couldn’t explain it, but this boy brought the most perplexing sense of calm over him – one that made his guard fall even after years of careful cultivation of anxiety and dread.

Kirishima’s throat felt dry. His eye’s widened in disbelief. Thoughts rushed in his head a million miles a minute but none of them ever made their way to the surface. He could only stand, frozen. No explanation for why the siren he had befriended was sitting on his bed with way too many legs and way too few scales.

Ashido, with perfect timing as always, stretched her arms and smiled, “He’s really cute, I’m surprised you didn’t tell us about him earlier.”

The afore mentioned boy remained silent, although his eyebrow twitched upwards in annoyance at this pink haired girl’s comment. Were these really his friends? He sighed and crossed his arms, only then meeting the redhead’s eyes.  A crimson blush took over Kirishima’s face. He swallowed, and quietly asked the others for a moment alone with the new visitor. 

“So, are you gonna say anything to me? Why are you here?” Kirishima sat on the bed next to him. The scratchy surface of Kirishima’s blanket made the siren shift uncomfortably, but he remained silent. Another sigh heaved it’s way out of Kirishima, “Can you even speak?” 

The words left his mouth before he could stop them – he immediately wanted to rip them from the air because of their harshness. He never expected the boy to talk, but he did feel he deserved some answers. He spoke again quickly, “Sorry, I-“

“Hurts..to speak…” a tiny voice seemed to crawl on it’s knees out of the other boys mouth. It was scratchy and deep, but it was there. 

Kirishima only nodded after a few moments – not in understanding, because how could he, but in silent pity. His mind was still struggling to wrap around all of this. How was he even going to broach the subject? Why was the siren sitting here exactly, looking all too human?

“Thought something…happened…”, Kirishima jumped slightly at his words – did he say all that out loud?  He swallowed the lump sitting stubbornly in his throat. 

“You thought something happened to me? Why?” The boy shifted again. Why was the feeling of this damn blanket so annoying to him?  “You…ran off. Didn’t come…back.. got worried.” he coughed slightly, obviously still straining to continue speaking. 

Kirishima hung his head in mock shame. He knew he’d have to face this eventually, but he thought it would be on his own terms at least. He chuckled softly to himself at that. He really was pathetic.  When he raised his head to look at the boy next to him, he found the perfect vermillion eyes staring back at him. He swallowed again.

“I’m gonna be honest with you. I don’t really know why I ran off myself. I’m, sorry.”, the words stung the inside of his mouth. He hated lying. He knew exactly why he ran away. He was a coward for not telling him, and he curled in on himsel-

“Did I scare…you?”, his voice was so unsure. He could feel the uncertainty titter-totering around behind those words. Uncertainty if he should even be asking that question.

But Kirishima was quick to reassure him, “No no!” he laughed, “Um, no. If anything I know it wasn’t because I was scared of you.”

Those vermillion eyes and sculpted features stared at him with a frown and one brow raised – clearly not believing him. 

“I’m serious! If I was scared of you, would I have agreed to be in here with you, alone?”, he smiled. And the boy almost did too – almost. He quickly regained control of his features and finally drew his eyes to the floor again.

A loud bang on the door interrupted the silence that promptly fell. The old wooden door moaned under the strain of the forceful knocks and Kirishima rushed to open it. As soon as he did, Kaminari’s worried face greeted him.

“Dude! You have to get him out of here, Miss Mitsuki is coming!”, Kaminari whisper-shouted. Cold panic slid down Kirishima’s spine. “What? Why!?” Kirishima sub-consciously closed the door a little – attempting to hide the teenager still sitting on the bed behind him. “I don’t know dude, she just said she wanted to talk to you in the bunk room! We managed to stall her telling her you were getting dressed but she’ll be back any second!”

The hushed panic piqued the siren’s interest. He stood from the bed silently, his legs wobbling. He leaned his head over Kirishima’s shoulder to hear better but as soon as the redhead noticed, he spoke quickly to the boy on the other side of the door and shut it just as quickly. Annoyance pricked the back of the siren’s neck. What were they hiding? He didn’t like this anymore.

Kirishima turned to face him, using his hands to push him over to the nearby window. It looked out over the surrounding forest and was covered only by a tired, white curtain. Kirishima’s eyes went wide as the siren stopped him and adorned a look that could kill – and probably has.

Kirishima held onto the boy’s shoulders and stared into his eyes. He spoke quietly, “Listen, if you don’t climb out of this window and leave right now someone is going to see you. We won’t be able to lie that you’re in our class or that you’re from around here. She knows everyone so she wouldn’t believe us.”

The blond boy swallowed a lump in his own throat. His frown deepened.

“I will come find you again, I promise…But you need to go.” Kirishima’s words seeped with concern laced with rushed panic. 

The siren tsked, anger rising from him like hot air as he clumsily clambered out of the window. He mumbled to himself, curses strung along as he made his way through the dense forest. He didn’t turn around to see Kirishima’s relieved sigh, or how he looked after him to make sure he was safe. Dammit.

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Weird, “Shards”

Another interpretation of humans by aliens. 

Inside, humanity is trapped, trapped inside its own body controlled by forces it doesn't understand and ruled by instinct it did not agree upon. The body is a foreign creation, a borrowed suit, a rented piece of equipment that came without instruction manual and too many defects. Trapped inside a cage they stare outwards from their physical prison, some are tortured on the inside, played with by their own bodies and own minds like it’s some sort of sick joke.

I've seen it, humanity desperately clawing outside themselves like a trapped man drowning under a wall of ice. They desperately wish to live outside themselves, to be more than the sum of a body. Perhaps this doesn’t explain much to you, but it explains some things to me. It explains why man is the only species that has ever attempted to create worlds. Some create worlds on pieces of paper or canvas inches long to feet wide with streaming ribbons of pigment  maddening themselves until the sky is colored in blood and the water is mixed with tears, horrified that their internal existence will go unnoticed creating for themselves an external existence. Others manipulate language like a strong wind manipulates the surface of a vast sea creating waves and peaks in which entire worlds reside crystalline pictures of artificial truth designed, precisely to transport humankind away from itself, make it a part of something bigger. It explains why they are desperate to possess concrete things, things they can touch, things they can feel, things that help them assure themselves that they truly ARE living.

But most of all, I think this is why humans collect souls. I’m not entirely sure of its existence. The Drev seem convinced, and humanity speaks of it more as a matter of fact than a matter of fiction, even if they do not intend it. Perhaps they desire to make their mark on something that can be marked that can truly be changed based on their presence because no matter what they write, what they paint, it doesn't change anything. The wind still bows and the rock never changes, eventually all of their efforts will be for nothing. Like everything begins, everything will end. 

I think they collect souls, because it’s the one thing they can truly make an impact on, something they can change. They can break it, they can mend it, they can change it. Light it on fire and blacken it, melt it and turn it to glass then shatter it with words.

Humanity collects souls, they collect each other, and sometimes choose to discard each other.

 But then there are the fragments, the fragments, leftover lying on the ground once deity was done creating humanity from their fragments. Fragments left behind that sometimes can seem so human but are missing pieces.

Created from the fragments, sometimes humans lose something themselves. Like a glass passed from hand to hand it chips and breaks and cracks, so it collects fragments to put itself back together.

I think that's why humans bond so closely with animals, trying to find something to patch the holes in themselves, the fragments, the ghosts of humanity, empathy, intelligence, sadness…. Love.

Why was man so lonely, so curious, so desperate to capture the spirits of things he should never have played with?

Once upon a time humanity crouched alone in the cold, looked up at the moon and listened to the cries of spirits in the dark. He lured it in with his fire and with his sympathy inviting his demons towards the fire where, together, he might be warm, and with his hands, he molded the devil into an angel a creature that would love him past blood and past time, but there was a price for man’s meddling, stuck in time watching as his angels grow old and wither before his eyes, growing week and cold before he feels the effect of that same time. Man taught his angels many things he could not, he made the darkness into a companion, into family, into a protector, a warrior. He gave his angel the keys to his heart, his emotions and his health, and then he watched them die.

And when humanity didn’t need an angel, the befriended chaos where, mirrored in its surface, they saw their own unpredictability, their own apathy, and their own need to be loved and admired…. But from a distance. Chaos sits in the same room, wanting you to know it’s there, but refusing you to come close. Maybe it will decide get in your way to curl up with you and watch the fire, but maybe it will strike at you unprovoked and run.

Humanity doesn’t mind, it does this itself on occasion it understands the paradox wanting to be noticed, to be loved, but to be left alone.

Once upon a time man desired to run from himself. He was looking for a fragment of freedom, limping through the world on tired feet blued by the cold back bent under the weight of the sun, and he met freedom on the grasslands. With deceptive words and bribes, he lured freedom to his side and enslaved it. He loved freedom, asked it to carry him towards the sun, and freedom agreed for the price of being fed.

Humanity doesn’t understand it’s broken pieces, doesn't notice how dangerous they are. They ran from these dangers like they ran from themselves. But these were just fragments splinters of humanity scattered on the wind. Maybe, just maybe if these splinters were gathered up, they would be equal to even half the hunger of man, the hatred, the desire for death. Maybe man became as strong as he did because it was more likely he’d hunt himself to extinction than his danger. Humanity chased himself like a dog chasing its tail, for the longest tie biting chunks and splinters, turning itself to dust. Humanity does that to itself sometimes.

Humanity collects many fragments. He sits in the corner and looks at himself in the polished surface seeing parts of himself reflected back. Maybe he will see the mysterious that we see reflected in the depths the creatures living there like the parts of his mind not even he understands. Maybe he will see something soft, something to hold, something to protect. 

Maybe he will see something that can fly.

But humanity is made of shards, it isn’t so simple, it isn’t just the sum of its parts, which is why man will never stop looking.

It will hold freedom captive, it will sit with chaos,and it will continue to foster angels.

Perhaps, now that humanity has found us, it will see its reflection more clearly 

[inke-ri]

A HTTYD 3 AU

@hiccup-is-left-handed did a thing (which I cannot link because mobile) and I really don’t wanna hijack their post but credit where credit is due ok? Ok.

This got way out of hand, I apologize for the long post… Idk how to put it under a read more on mobile, heh <3

—

So. The Hidden World AU where Toothless and the Light Fury are friends/“just like me” sort of situation + Hiccup is the one captured:

• That add on where the beginning was dark and grimy, yes. • The Grimmel scene happens between him and a fallen drago. Drago desperately needs a new Alpha to control his dragon army, so he enlists Grimmel. • The Light Fury in the cage is not in fact our LF girl, but a young male, about Toothless’ age in HTTYD 1 • Grimmel’s comment about him is around the line of “Furies are social creatures”, so through that line we learn that Toothless would in fact crave a “pack” (I keep calling a group of furies a pack bear with me), except he doesn’t really know that yet.

• Toothless meeting this equivalent of yearling male would go the same way except the dynamic would be (as hiccup-is-left-handed mentioned) similar to spiderverse’s “you’re like me”– a connection but not a romantic one

• Grimmel would still attack Hiccup’s home, but his deathgrippers actually torch down a good deal of the village • Because of the grimy beginning we see this is just another attack and Berk’s people have been suffering (injuries, slings and stuff in the great hall scene) • a bigger deal is made out of them leaving, there’s probably a scene where Hiccup is sitting next to his father’s statue after the meeting and talking to it, asking for advice • Astrid comforts Hiccup there– you’d have time for this since we’d cut most of the Hesitant To Get Married subplot, it’s in fact treated as something to happen someday in the future but both agree with the current situation it’s best to postpone it • or maybe Valka, since because we’re removing the marriage subplot, she could still get One Good Scene with Hiccup. It would still be a little stiff between them, since she’s still relatively new at this mom thing, but they both try. It’s up to you. Either way, Hiccup is convinced they must leave now. • Personally, because I’m a nerd, I’d make the beginning of the scene about Hiccup telling one of them (Valka or Astrid, your call), about how when he were little he always wanted the glory, and to be a Hero to his tribe… But he has so many difficult choices to make and it’s hard. And Valka/Astrid comments that yes, indeed, some people win glory “easily”, how Hiccup would have gotten had he killed that Night Fury, others… Well, others like him need to become Heroes the Hard Way <3 • Probably a scene of the Berkians sadly looking back to their old island and and then forward to their new future

• The yearling doesn’t go back for Toothless, but (in Nova Berk) Toothless does pick up his scent and follows him to that beachy area Toothless tries to woo the LF in the actual movie • There we find out the yearling male has a sibling, a sister, and THAT would be our girl. He calls out to the mountains and she appears and makes a huge fuss about him being back (which gives them both some nice personalities as well as showing their devotion to each other)

• Toothless is in fact attracted to her, but it’s a very minor thing in the grand scheme of him meeting others like him • Toothless tries to join them, and like in the movie Hiccup tries to coach him through befriending these dragons which are so like him • LF girl still gets offended, Toothless still falls down from the tree. yearling LF is very amused at this but also very curious about the branch, so he picks it up and starts playing with it in a rather catlike fashion • Toothless decides to show them how HE plays with the branch, so he picks it up and starts drawing • It’s no big fancy drawing, just his usual scribbles, but both siblings are very intrigued and impressed by it • Toothless still growls at the LF when she tries to step on it, and she growls back (they do NOT get started on the best terms despite Toothless’ original attraction– it could even be read as him just being curious about the fact that she���s a female), but the young male does get it, so he hops around the lines like Hiccup did, grabs the stick and flies away • Following her brother’s example, the LF tries to get to Toothless by hopping around the scribbly lines • We’d get a similar scene to Hiccup hitting his back on toothless and looking up at him, except the LF just gazes at him and Toothless smiles a little at her • She in turn tried to copy his facial expression and smiles as well, and it’s -then- that they click • The siblings still find Hiccup, but Toothless stands between them and his friend so they just choose to leave instead • Toothless still falls on the water trying to follow them but he doesn’t glare at his lack of tail, just looks longingly up at them

• Hiccup does NOT make a new tailfin right away for Toothless. Instead, we get a very “See You Tomorrow” montage, except it’s with Toothless going between the dragons and Hiccup, and each time he learns something new about himself • You could also show Hiccup looking a bit down/feeling left off during this montage, but trying to be happy for Toothless • Eventually, Hiccup decides to make the new tailfin. The scene would go basically the same way except there’s a bigger moment for Toothless not wanting to leave Hiccup, he smells the old saddle and Hiccup comforts him, saying it’s okay. He would have explained to astrid the reason why he made the new tail is not cause Toothless “never had a reason to leave”, it’s just cause Toothless is discovering a new side of him and Hiccup wants him to be happy

• the “third date” scene would be mostly be a platonic scene between the three furies, where Toothless learns to harness lightning • The difference would be the young male gets separated from them for a bit, chasing after some bird or something (he’s young and excitable, also a personality point for him) • You’d then get a smaller version of a romantic scene, but you can clearly see that after that wrong first impression the LF and Toothless do seem to like each other. Still would get the scene of them flying up into the moon and Toothless kissing her, and the “wing holding”. That was cute, and I like that scene, but the romance would still be comparatively secondary • The young male would interrupt the “hand holding”, and that’s where they’d find the hidden world. Male goes in excitedly and toothless hesitates but LF cheerfully drags him down after her brother

• The Hiccup side of it remains the same. They go after Grimmel, there’s an emphasis on all the anti-dragon humans banding together to take down berk. • Grimmel’s villain speech gets a flashback in which we get a scene more akin to the one of the first Dragons movie, there’s a slight discrepancy compared to Grimmel’s words. In the flashback, Grimmel -hesitates- before killing a wounded, sleeping night fury (it could even be faking its sleep, kinda like how Toothless just closed his eyes and waited for death, but that might be too much for a kid’s movie), but eventually does kill it • All the riders make it out of Grimmel’s trap.

• Hiccup and Astrid still go after Toothless • the Hidden World scene is expanded upon. We actually get two things that Hiccup sees: one (and this is optional but a personal headcanon of mine) being the LF siblings introducing Toothless to small, wary, scarred group of night furies (complete with Hiccup’s awe at finding more of them but also his realization that HUMANS did that to those dragons, they’re scarred and crippled because of them) • The other would be that Toothless doesn’t have the time to meet them properly, he gets distracted by squabble between two groups of wild dragons over food. Toothless instinctively uses his alpha command to take one of the groups to another feeding location, avoiding a fight. • The dragons recognize Toothless as a benevolent Alpha, and bow to him. It’s then that Astrid says that “now that’s a king” line.

• Hiccup chooses to leave Toothless there (the shock and pain of the Night Fury survivors being a factor of Hiccup deciding Toothless is better off without him, and besides, we’ve been building up on that “Toothless prefers his new friends over me” issue Hiccup is dealing with) • The whole rumblehorn thing happens and Toothless still brings Hiccup home, but Toothless isn’t angry or anything. The two light Furies do follow them. Seeing them actually only hardens Hiccup’s resolve, and he essentially kicks Toothless out, but he’s lashing out out of hurt, worry, rejection, and overall being overwhelmed by his duties as a Chief (namely the very large group of vikings bent on destroying Berk due to their philosophy) and his love and worry for Toothless • Toothless does leave, looking hurt but he does. • Astrid tries to comfort Hiccup again, but this time he just wants to be alone. Once she leaves, Hiccup mourns a little, but then he’s suddenly shot with one of Grimmel's darts. Astrid sees him be taken, but it’s too late to rescue him

• Hiccup wakes up in a ship of the armada his mother had seen on Cloudjumper, and is surprised in a very angry way to see Drago there (we hadn’t seen him since the moment he lashes at Grimmel for letting the Berkians get away– but he does so in a logical and tactical way) • Drago wants the location of the Hidden World – something he probably got from Grimmel who overheard it during the raid on his lair – and he plans to use Hiccup for it • Remember when Hiccup was called a devil in the beginning of the movie? This scene would get its payback here!! In a very clear parallel to Dragons 1, Drago would shackle Hiccup and sail east, and in a very Stoick-esque way, tells him to “lead the way, [to the nest], little devil” • Y'know like what happened to Toothless in HTTYD 1

• Cut to Toothless in the Hidden World. He’s looking at his tail, rather forlorn and lost • The Lightfury comes to see him, looking rather affectionate- they’re a couple, it seems. Toothless looks to her and then to behind him, where the other Light/Night furies (and some other dragons in the background) are waiting for him • Toothless isn’t ready yet. He licks the LF (think of a “I have to” kiss on the cheek Hiccup gave Astrid in HTTYD 2), and flies towards the waterfall and out of the hidden world, back to Hiccup.

• Drago is sailing towards the general direction of the hidden world, guided by the direction Toothless flew off before he captured Hiccup • Hiccup is unable to free himself, but then he (and the antagonists) is surprised to see that Berk is flying towards the armada to free him, en masse. All seem determined to defend the Hidden World’s entrance from Drago’s fleet • It’s a nice shout out to both HTTYD 1, where that small team fought the read death, but also to how the vikings have changed, how Hiccup has changed them. A small team has become a whole village. • no one can quite get to Hiccup tho, but then Drago is surprised to find Toothless there, looking very very angry • Grimmel still threatens someone Toothless loves, but it’s Hiccup this time. For a brief moment, Toothless controls the dragons away from the fight, so Hiccup isn’t killed. Toothless cannot let Hiccup die. He can’t. He loves him too much. • Drago and Grimmel however, are distracted long enough for Toothless to grab Hiccup and flee– not by humans but by the whole group of light and night furies. It seems as though Furies are a very territorial species, and act as protectors of the hidden world.

• Grimmel still grabs the LF, Toothless still follows him with Hiccup. The whole thing that went down in the movie happens here. Grimmel dies. Toothless is rescued by the young, excitable LF Male, while our girl, who has always been more distrustful of Hiccup, saves his life. She does smile crookedly at him, that very Toothless smile she learned from him.

• Drago is still out there, though. Hiccup, Toothless and the dragon gang regroup while most of Berk still fights. Hiccup is alive, but feels lost, he always wanted to prevent a war and now a war has happened anyway • This is where Astrid comes in again, and where she repeats that “what are you going to do about it” line • The gang goes after drago– and surprise: Hiccup is using the old saddle, but Toothless still wears the new tailfin, one last big fight for the two of them: this time, while they’re still connected, they’re able to fight apart from each other– maybe it’s here that we get that sword/explosion/look between Hiccup and Astrid. Toothless is flying on his own, and Hiccup is fighting on his own as well. By mutual choice this time, knowing how their differences don’t affect their devotion to each other • The furies fight alongside Hiccup, Toothless and the Berkians, showing the beauty of cooperation and mutual respect between humans and dragons that do decide to work together… As well as allowing Hiccup one big flight with Toothless and other night furies, as was his dream for his friend. • Drago is defeated, and the army scatters (how it’s up to you, I’m still fond of the jailed idea, except Drago falls under water and drowns, or something. Idk. For a man who’s so determined to control and dominate, dying in a cage designed to control and rip freedom away would be pretty good poetic justice, but idk.)

• Hiccup and Toothless still part ways. Hiccup’s speech isn’t really about how his dream wasn’t the dragons’ dream. Instead, much like the books, he says that Humanity isn’t quite ready to share the world with them, and that Toothless needs to take them away for their own safety (basically the same message of the movie but sans the weird “hiccup is clinging to toothless” subplot.) • That heart-wrenching scene still happens pretty much the same way.

• The ending is also very much the same, the babies and stuff. We’d probably see more light furies and one or two night furies on the other rocks surrounding the hidden world– they still act as protectors. • the ending goes very much the same way: I’d just tweak the words a little to explain that this isn’t just about hiding the hidden world’s secret (though you do see that in a way, Hiccup and Berk = the Furies’ role, all are guardians of the Hidden World, kinda binding them together even if they are away), but also about spreading the message that one day humans and dragons (wildlife?) can coexist someday, and when We’re ready, the Dragons will one day return.

— ……. Well that was long. I’ve been furiously typing on my phone for a good hour and a half actually. My fingers are dead but I just love this idea so much.

Also very much Not Revised so forgive any grammar/spelling mistakes!

Sorry for like. Making this way too big, Hiccup-is-left-handed. I got way too excited about it :’D

[elizabethrobertajones]

Suddenly I'm getting these psychopath!dean thoughts after reading the new buckleming interview. God help me

I need to preface this with a signal boost of @justanotheridijiton‘s gif request :P

https://justanotheridijiton.tumblr.com/post/179162557389/alright-i-need-me-a-gifmaker-willing-to-make-a

Anyways after that completely irrelevant thing I put here, and, weirdly, an aside that I swear I remember her talking a lot about how Dean was going to be affected by like… tentacles of trauma or something afterwards at SDCC, here’s the interview:

https://tvline.com/2018/10/17/supernatural-spoilers-season-14-big-bad-not-michael/

As for the beloved Winchester trapped inside Michael, if/when Dean is eventually freed, he won’t be as traumatized as one might think by the horrible things the archangel did while sporting his vessel. “Dean’s been contaminated by Cain. He’s a tough guy,” Ross-Leming notes. “His body’s sort of accumulated a lot of, I think, antibodies against evil, so he’ll be OK. He knows how to handle himself, even though he’s been altered. But there is a little bit of a surprise, in terms of this semi-possession, which I can’t tell you about. There’s a little bit of a twist.”

Given that I’m at an all time low for thinking she knows what she’s talking about after watching so many interviews with her in a morbid attempt to learn anything I can about this fascinating and terrible person, I can barely lend any credence to what she says, whether these are points that will be discussed in the show or things that she has thought for herself at random and may or may not be the subtext to her specific chunks of the show and nowhere else :P That lack of faith in this specific writer makes it super hard to engage with the commentary.

She says he’s been contaminated, which is more of a poisoning which would imply ongoing damage that creates ill-effects, and also that he has antibodies, which are positive and good things in the body that are created to protect us from the bad, and would be making the opposite point that instead of him picking up more and more badness to the point that it affects his personality, that his experiences have given him a stronger immunity to lingering corruption and that he will survive relatively intact.

(vaccinate your kids)

Which means she’s literally saying he’s altered, he’s semi-possessed, he’s fine, and that somewhere in that there’s a twist. And this also:

Plus, this ordeal with Michael “doesn’t take as big a toll” on the hunter as, say, his experience in Hell did, the EP reveals, “because there’s something else that’s going to happen that will take a bigger toll on Dean, and he has to pay attention to that.”

reads to me as another instance where she has her focus on what she herself is writing, and not particularly on what the other writers might do. I doubt that in a season where Dean started off possessed, that the other writers will not want to tackle the rich, rich psychology of post-Michael Dean, whether she has thought it was interesting or not. 

I kind of feel like whatever she’s trying to say, the message is that she hasn’t focused on Dean’s post-Michael trauma, is interested in something else, and has written him coming out of it relatively unscathed and focused on something new, which is actually fairly common for Buckleming episodes, to fling us to a new event and not focus on what had been previously traumatising the characters, as they’re kind of terrible at doing deep introspective episodes with the pacing to allow for that :P 

But away from all that… Yeah, I have always liked the whole Mark of Cain destined for Dean stuff from back in season 9/10 and find it really interesting even if it was wearing by the end of season 10, I had a lot of fascination in the character study of Dean, the psychology behind demon!Dean, and all the stuff that was brought out over the seasons of how the Mark affected him, that there was a connection back to Michael and Lucifer, and how it seemed like Cain was the Dean mirror who would have been the more natural Michael!vessel and Abel the Lucifer one and so on. And in 10x14 the interest in Cain decimating the planet because he believed his descendants were inherently killers, and how he identified Dean as a killer. 

Which is a struggle Dean has had for a long time through canon, especially since 2x03 when Gordon showed up to highlight the difference between killing monsters for bloody minded vengeance and pleasure, vs being heroic and making the good calls. And I think why Michael has symbolically ended up with vampires as his choice of monster to play with now, because Dean’s struggle is so tightly wrapped up with vampires, whether it be turning into one, or befriending Benny and clinging to the purity of Purgatory. Which is a state very similar to what Michael identifies in the vampires as a good motivation and something admirable to spread and remove all this dumb human confusion. 

In every way Michael has been designed from the start to be the worst!Dean, all his struggles with being the elder son and dealing with Lucifer. His dialogue especially in 5x22 is anvil heavy to make him a Dean parallel, except showing where he lacks love and compassion and forgiveness, the traits that make Dean show up to Stull to save Sam, while Michael is banished for being terrible, and symbolically was a moment where we could see shunning of how Dean was raised (it was “jacked up” Dean says in 2x03 when he first reflects on how the world wasn’t as black and white as he thought) and all this is blamed on John, or in Michael’s case, on Chuck.

They’re both given the same burdens of killing their brothers, and Michael goes so far as to make that awful spear (which was his reintroduction into the narrative - the toxicity of his choice to kill Lucifer enacted on Cas as an innocent bystander to all this, one of Michael’s former underlings being stabbed by one of Lucifer’s former underlings). Michael has already banished Lucifer to the cage once, and is fully committed to the apocalypse and killing his brother a second time. For all Lucifer’s flaws, I think he would genuinely hesitate to try to kill Michael in all the iterations of these fights, which is how in this fable, that we know at least 4 enactments of JUST in the primary set of Michael vs Lucifer before we get to all their mirrors in Cain & Abel, Gordon and his sister (and Jake from 2x22 and his) etc, and Sam and Dean… Michael kills Lucifer almost every time unless stopped, and many of the worst mirrors do too. Cain asks Dean why he didn’t kill his, as if fully aware of the weight of how every Michael has his Lucifer, and Dean says you never give up on family, ever. Dean has love, and that is why he said yes to Michael.

So it’s that balance that there’s a killer streak in them, that Dean can descend into states of killing for purity, for the mindlessness of it, that he becomes a tool, a blunt little instrument, and finally the Michael Sword, and yet he also has this ultimate power of love that the universe literally turns around and has shifted on its axis multiple times because of, because of all these people, Dean is the one who never gives up on family. So the issue of how murderous Dean is is REALLY REALLY interesting, like how they got him to break in hell, bookending his power of love saving of the world in 5x22, from his worst to his best. And then on it’s “oh you’re torturing again!?” as a sign that Dean is in a bad place. And of course now Michael in Dean is torturing vampires, so this is the absolute culmination of all the darkest parts of the symbolism and themes that make up Dean’s darkest side, and he’s being made to live through all of them right now. 

However, I expect Eugenie to consider maybe like 2 facts from that whole thought process while writing because she’s just so wildly bad at this whole thing… So, yeah. I’d like to see what Meredith does with this instead, by a factor of millions. 

[paperiahma]

Inquisitor Surana - a brief summary

After seeing the positive response in dragonageconfessions, I decided to make this quick summary how my headcanon for my Inquisitor Surana works. Mostly it’s to clarify the events in Origins and how they tie into Inquisition. There are also a few points I make about the events in Inquisition. In short, here is an AU where a human mage Iren Amell becomes the Warden while his friend, an elven mage Feralsha Surana, ends up as the Inquisitor. 

If someone is curios about details - any details - feel free to message me. Seriously, you can ask me about her spell preferences or what she looks like or hell, what her favourite food is. I guarantee you, I will be overjoyed to reply. 

Thank you again, for all you lovely people who responded so well this little AU^^

*Was born to two elven servants and taken away when her magical abilities awaken at the age of five. Two of the three templars were quite rough and cold, but the third one spoke to her kindly and comforted her all the way from Highever to the Circle.

 *A shy child, she kept mostly to herself and studied magic with enthusiasm and deep fascination. However, it was soon made clear how closely she was being watched and she was terrified of making mistakes. Once she was practicing a fire spell on her own and burnt her hands. Too scared to tell anyone, she hid in the library until an older mage found her and healed the burns. That was her first proper talk with Irving who took her to his office to talk about magic and balance and how one must sometimes fail before seeing how to do things right.

 *As a quiet, brilliant child, Feralsha was easy to walk over so she had a hard time making any friends and she was picked on by some bullies. However, another apprentice, a couple of years her senior, defended her and took her under his wing. This apprentice was Iren Amell, another child genius.

 *Soon after, the dynamic duo became the three magical musketeers as they met and befriended Jowan.

 *The three of them were inseparable, even when both Feralsha and Iren became apprentices to the First Enchanter himself. The boys, especially Iren, would often come up with all sorts of wild ideas and pranks and Feralsha was dragged along. She did always laugh with them about it all afterwards, but she also reined them in every now and then, keeping them from crossing the line. As a mastermind behind most of the plan, Iren always came up with a lie or another trick to keep the softer Feralsha out of trouble.

 *Iren was always confident, charismatic and incredibly witty. Quite a few apprentices, including Feralsha, had a crush on him at one point or another. Feralsha’s teenage crush lasted only a little while before those feelings changed into sister’s love.

 *After getting used to the templars, Feralsha often made an effort to talk with them and learned who would return her friendliness and who wouldn’t. She always made a point to at least politely greet them as she walked by. Soon she befriended one of the younger recruits, Cullen.

 *Feralsha’s Harrowing was merely hours apart from Iren’s. Like him, she met a Pride demon in her test. It might seem quite odd for many who knew her as a humble and sweet young woman who never bragged. But there was always hidden pride within her and Feralsha was often (perhaps needlessly) worried she’d let it take over and do something foolish.

 *She and Iren helped Jowan to destroy his phylactery but when they were caught by the templars, Iren pushed her away from him and Jowan and yelled at her for “slowing them down by trying to stop them”, hoping his lie would save her from the fall. Struck numb by this, she never found the words to protest before everything escalated. As Jowan attacked, she was devastated, as she was losing both of her brothers. Jowan ran, Iren was taken away by the Grey Warden Duncan and she was left alone.

 (Trivia worth mentioning: my friend headcanons Iren as Duncan’s son. Duncan knows about this but he never gets the chance to talk to Iren about it. Iren, however, later figures it out on his own. This whole idea sparked when my friend noticed how she had accidentally made Iren look a lot like Duncan.)

 *Feralsha did tell Irving the truth about her involvement later but he knew of it already. However, he understood her reasons and even though he was disappointed, he never told anyone else about the truth. When Wynne returned to the Circle with news of Ostagar, Feralsha’s heart was shattered. She spent most of the following weeks in isolation, eating little and only talking with Irving or Cullen and not much to them either. When she wasn’t mourning, she was distracting herself with studies.

 *When the Circle was attacked, Feralsha’s every instinct told her to run and find safety. She was not a great brave fighter and had no stomach for violence. However, knowing that both Irving (her mentor and only parental figure) and Cullen (her last dear friend) were exactly where all the abominations were coming from, she couldn’t make herself to leave. So she fought her way forward, saving a couple of injured templars and mages in the process, though refusing to flee with them. Eventually she encountered the Sloth demon standing over Niall and was pulled into the Fade.

 *Feralsha’s Fade trap was once again created by a Pride. She saw a dream of a reformed Circle with her as its First Enchanter. The Circle was independent, safe environment for all. Iren was there in a shimmering silver and blue uniform of the Wardens, happy and healthy. Jowan was there free and smiling with Lily, who was pregnant. Cullen was the new knight-commander of the templars who remained in the Circle with lesser authority and worked together with mages instead above them. She escaped the trap, found Niall and began exploring the Fade islands.

 *Around the same time in the waking world, Iren encountered the Sloth demon and ended up in the Fade, too.

 *Though terrified to the core, Feralsha did manage to find two new shapes before Iren found her. He wasn’t in a shimmering uniform, he didn’t come with good news and he looked quite weary and thin. But he was alive and ready to fight and Feralsha was overwhelmingly relieved to see him. Just Iren’s presence was enough to convince her all was going to turn out fine, somehow. Together they found their ways through the Fade, rescued Iren’s companions and escaped the Fade with Nial’s dying wish.

 *Meeting Cullen was shocking on many levels. Seeing him so utterly pained and broken was already enough to make Feralsha kneel in front of the magical cage in an effort to comfort him. But his pained confession of his affection for her and the new hate towards mages cut like poisoned daggers. In the end, Feralsha didn’t say much at the time. Too tired from fighting and hurting too much for his sake, she didn’t know if she could in any way make things better. She had loved Cullen as a very dear friend for a long time but knew it was unlikely she’d ever get him back like that.

 *In the final battle against Uldred, Feralsha stood with Iren and managed to save First Enchanter Irving and the rest of the mages, much to their relief. Afterwards, as the dust settled and Wynne requested a leave to travel with Iren, Feralsha did the same. Part of her wanted to stay to rebuild her home and make sure Irving and Cullen would recover. But at the same time she knew Iren would be in far greater danger and she didn’t want to lose her brother a second time. So she left the Tower with him and followed him all the way to the Archdemon.

 *(As a side note, my friend hasn’t had the chance to play the Awakening, but I’m personally convinced Feralsha remained with Iren during that)

 *During the years after the Blight and its aftermath, Feralsha returned to the Circle. It had gained far more independence, thanks to Iren and King Alistair and as one of the few remaining mages in Ferelden, she wished to give her all to use this opportunity. By this time Cullen had already been sent to Kirkwall before she could have the chance to properly talk to him. She sent a couple of letters but never got a reply.

 *Feralsha traveled Ferelden on small expeditions to study magical sites or old ruins. She made contact with a few dalish clans (including the clan Lavellan) and traded information with their keepers. She climbed the Circle ranks and taught some classes, even tutoring Dagna. During this time her spirit grew stronger and she gained confidence, eventually becoming ready to accept the leading position with an open heart.

 *Soon Irving began training Feralsha to become the First Enchanter after him so she threw herself into her studies once more. Though she was already an expert on many arcane fields of study and adept at history, she began to deepen that knowledge while also studying politics, economics and culture. She did rise to the position just a couple of years before the mage-templar conflict finally reached its breaking point.

 *Despite the war, she looked after her own Circle and its people the best she could. Feralsha wanted the Circles back, but not in the same way as they had been before. She wanted a safe environment for the mages to study where they could also have the main authority and would be allowed the freedom to see their families. She found templars necessary as well, but as guardians, not prison guards. She felt that the concept was sound but the system needed to be thoroughly rebuilt for both sides.

 *When the Conclave was announced, she took part as Ferelden’s First Enchanter. And was the only one to survive.

 *Though a fairly devout Andrastian, Feralsha never claimed to be Andraste’s Herald or “the chosen one”. However, secretly she  wanted to believe some of it. Not that she was Andraste’s equal or that she had the right to speak for Her... but she did want to believe the Maker had chosen her for this. But for the fear of pride and arrogance, she didn’t dare to truly believe so for a time. But when Haven was attacked, her faith that she was chosen for this finally strengthened, because she needed it to. She needed to believe she was chosen. Maybe not a Herald, maybe not a prophet… but a guardian of some sort. Chosen in a way she believed Iren was chosen to be the Hero of Ferelden.

 *Meeting Cullen again was quite jarring, especially considering the long years after their previous encounter. To avoid unnecessary awkwardness, neither of them showed any sign of knowing each other when they were first introduced. Later, when Feralsha went to talk to him, they first remained professional and distant, until finally she admitted she had wondered what had happened to him. They talked for some time, mostly telling about the past years, reassuring there were no hard feelings and both agreed to start again. They had not met in almost ten years and people change a lot in that time, so in truth they barely knew each other. Yet both were glad to see the other healthy and were looking forward to getting to know each other again.

 *Feralsha’s feelings for Cullen slowly grew as she got to know him better. She found small private moments to talk with him more and more often, feeling safe in his presence while also being treated as an equal. By Skyhold the feelings had deepened and the romance finally bloomed on both sides.

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine one-shot - “Death, Love, Life, and Everything in Between” (Rated PG13)

Kurt, a Grim Reaper, has been doing his job for decades, with plenty of heartbreak but no complaints, until one day, Death tells him to reap the soul of someone he doesn’t want to take. Will Death move time and space for the only angel he’s ever loved? (2569 words)

A/N: I went with a lot of creative license with regard to Death and the Grim Reaper, playing on the idea that there is more than one angel that acts as Grim Reaper, and that Death controls them all. Also, Death is an angel that other angels seem to fear (even to the point that he appears skeletal - like the ghost of Christmas future) but he fell in love with Kurt. This is a re-write, but only because I've always wanted @sunshineoptimismandangels to read this, and I don't want her reading a pairing that makes her uncomfy :)

My Grim Reaper Kurt was fashioned after this picture.

Warning for angst, talk of the afterlife, feelings of abandonment, mention of kidnapping and assault.

Read on AO3.

Kurt stands in the shadows of the tiny bedroom – one of his favorite bedrooms. It’s in the house that was once his house when he was a child. When he was human. When he was still alive. Of course, the house was different then. It’s been renovated numerous times over the decades – plumbing added, then electricity, porchlights installed, the simple glass panes refitted with storm windows to make them energy efficient. So much has changed, time marching on, life moving forward, despite the fact that he’s no longer a part of it – as it does. As it will.

Even after tonight.

The walls in this room have been painted a bright, sunshine yellow - something he would never have done, but then, it wouldn’t have suited him. But it suits her, the little girl sitting at her honey wood desk - a desk that once belonged to her mother. She sniffles as she writes, carefully penning her good-bye letter on a sheet of Power Puff Girl stationary using her favorite pink pen, one with a fluffy yellow puff on the end, fastened with a spring so it bobs back and forth as she writes, googly eyes glued to the front shaking with every word.

Kurt can’t see over her shoulder from where he stands, but he can hear the words in his head while she writes them.

Dear Daddy and Joan and new baby Alex –

By the time you read this, I will be gone. I know that you don’t want me. And with the new baby coming, there won’t be any room for me here. I’m not angry or upset. I understand, so don’t be sad. I don’t want to tell you where I’m going, but know that I’ll be safe and happy when I get there.

Kurt shakes his head miserably, wiping at tears on his cheeks that shouldn’t be there. He’s been doing his job for longer than he was alive, and it always makes him melancholy, but he hasn’t cried in … well he can’t remember.

Kurt knows she’s planning to go to her Grandma Ethel’s house in California – the only family she has on her mother’s side since her mother passed away a few years ago. She’s only ten-years-old. She shouldn’t be making plans like this. She shouldn’t be running away. She might not realize it, but her father will miss her more than he’d miss anyone in his life, even his new wife and baby. This little girl, aside from being his first daughter and princess, is the only living link he has to her mother – a woman he loved from the first moment he set eyes on her, back when they, too, were only children.

This little girl is running away because a new baby is coming, and things around the house have been strained. Her father – working extra hours to prepare for the new arrival - hasn’t had the chance to sit for longer than five minutes and talk to her about it, about all the changes taking place, explain the stress it’s putting him under, and she thinks the problem in the house is her. She loves her father, and she thinks leaving will make things better for him.

Kurt’s there because she never makes it.

She’ll walk out her front door and get as far as the 7-11 eight blocks away, stopping for a Slushie when her backpack stuffed with clothes and toys gets too heavy to carry. That’s when a handsome young man named Peter will approach her. He’ll listen to her sad story and promise to take her to the Greyhound station. He’ll even offer to pay for her ticket so she can keep her allowance money for snacks along the way.

What happens after that is the kind of thing that people only read about in horror novels.

Kurt’s part in all of this is to do what he’s doing now – wait in the shadows until she’s gone, and then take her spirit home – but he won’t. Not this time.

But he can’t change her fate. He doesn’t have the power. If he leaves, if he refuses to stay, she might not die tonight. But eventually, she will. She won’t be able to escape it. He needs someone higher to help him.

There’s only one who can do it, and he’s not accustomed to bending the rules.

Kurt has been waiting for him long enough. He can’t wait much longer, but he won’t take his eyes off this little girl. He won’t leave her alone.

Kurt feels him when he enters the room, slinking up behind him like a serpent in the grass, icy threads trailing wherever he goes. Most angels avoid him. He’s a necessary evil. Even where they exist in the glory of the afterlife, no one speaks to him. No one goes out of their way to befriend him.

No one but Kurt.

The creature puts his hands on Kurt’s shoulders and squeezes, and Kurt silently prays for a yes.

“No,” he says simply.

“But Blaine …” Kurt starts, his voice trembling.

“I can’t impose my will on humans,” Blaine says, his chill breath touching Kurt’s skin, seeping through his clothes. “There are strict rules. I don’t make them. You know that.”

“Bullshit, Blaine!” Kurt snaps, his grief making way for anger, filling his unbeating heart and his broken soul. “You know you can if the situation requires it!”

“This situation,” Blaine hisses, “does not require it.”

“Blaine …”

“Kurt …” Blaine volleys, but he’s not toying with him. Not the way he might with others in his service. He doesn’t like seeing Kurt upset, but for as powerful as he is, this is a trap he can’t get locked in.

“Blaine, I can’t!” Kurt pleads. “I don’t want to do this! I’ve already taken her mother! I can’t take her, too!”

“What do you expect me to do, Kurt!?” Blaine growls, not angry at Kurt, but frustrated at the situation. He would do anything for Kurt, give him anything, but there are limits to what even he can do. Being Death is not a job for the sentimental. It must be done without compassion getting in the way.

Which is why Blaine gave up his own a long time ago.

This little girl is Kurt’s job. If Kurt doesn’t do what he was sent here to do, no other angel can, and that will be a problem.

Because Blaine will be forced to, and by doing so, he may lose Kurt forever.

Before Blaine’s angels brought him Kurt, being Death was a simple matter of absolutes. When someone’s time came, their soul was collected. End of story, quite literally. There was nothing in between. And, for his part, Kurt does his job, he does as he’s told, but he’s a convolution of grey areas – spectrums that bleed together and somehow, impossibly, become colors again. Colors that Blaine didn’t remember existed before Kurt. They remind him of a great many things. They remind him of what it felt like to be human, too. “Speed up time? Bend space for one little girl. I can’t!” Kurt draws his arms around his chest and pulls away from Blaine’s grasp. “You know how this plays out,” Blaine says in softer tones, hoping Kurt will let him touch him again. “It’s a big misunderstanding.”

“I know.” Kurt sniffles. “They didn’t forget about her. They didn’t leave her. Her father had to rush Joan to the hospital when she ruptured. The baby had to be delivered early. And this little girl got back from the sitter’s too late.”

“Dad won’t realize it until the deed is done,” Blaine picks up when Kurt can’t continue, hoping Kurt will see reason in the retelling. “She runs away and gets picked up by …” Kurt whimpers, looking back at Blaine – straight into his ghostly pale face and hollow gaze - with watery eyes. “I can’t fix it, Kurt,” he says. “It’s horrible and disgusting and an example of the true evil that exists on this stupid ball of dust and air, but there’s nothing I can do.”

Blaine puts his skeletal hands on Kurt’s shoulders again, trying to give him comfort, and Kurt lets his hands stay. He takes a breath in – a shuddery gulp of air to keep his voice steady.

“Her name is Elizabeth, Blaine,” Kurt says. “Just like my mother.”

“I know,” Blaine whispers. It’s dark, sinister, but Kurt can hear the affection in it.

“She’ll be scared and alone, and in agony for hours before she dies.” Kurt shakes his head. “Please. I don’t ask you for any favors. I take the lot that’s given to me. But this …” He looks back at the little girl drawing hearts on her note, a tear dropping from her chin and leaving a watermark on the paper. “I can’t, Blaine. There won’t be anything of me left if you make me do this. If I reap this little girl … I’ll truly be dead.”

Blaine feels Kurt’s fire beneath his fingertips canceling out his cold, the strength of his conviction, his need to save this girl. Blaine has met a great many quote/unquote good people in his time, people who have done admirable deeds on Earth, but never someone so genuinely good as Kurt. Blaine knows that Kurt doesn’t have the power, but he’ll find a way to move heaven and Earth to save her, even if it means losing himself in the process.

And Blaine can’t lose Kurt.

“Alright.” Blaine puts an arm around Kurt’s waist, pulling him against his bare rib cage and kissing him on the back of the head. “Just this once, and only because I love you.”

Kurt nods. He knows. He knows that of every angel he commands, all those who do his bidding and fear him, Blaine loves him.

When Kurt arrived in Blaine’s service and saw how the angels avoided him, he felt sorry for Blaine - sorry for this inhuman-looking creature, for all intents and purposes an angel, dressed in his black hood and seated on his morbid throne. And Kurt stayed. He stayed when Blaine refused to speak to him, stayed when Blaine tried to push him away. He felt compelled to stay, as if his true purpose in becoming a reaper wasn’t to bring human souls to heaven, but to bring Blaine’s soul back from wherever he’d banished it to. Slowly, after decades of time spent together, Blaine began to open up to him. He began to confide in him. He began to love him.

And, eventually, Kurt started to love him back.

Blaine raises a hand, his sleeve falling away from an arm that has begun to regrow skin, and snaps his fingers, calling up the book of Elizabeth’s life. It’s not a corporal book, but Kurt can still see it, the pages pulling back, the ink bleeding from them and the words rewritten, restarting life and time over from a few minutes ago, and a man rushes frantically in through the front door.

“Elizabeth!” he calls from the living room. “Lizzie! Baby! Where are you?”

The girl’s head pops up in amazement, and she wipes the tears off her cheeks.

“H-here!” she yells, getting up from her desk and running to her bedroom door. “Here I am! Upstairs in my room!”

“Oh, Lizzie!” her father cries, racing up the staircase to meet her, taking the steps two at a time. He grabs her in his arms and spins her around. “I’m sorry! I’m so so sorry that no one was here when you got home! You must have been so scared, being home alone.”

“No, I …” Elizabeth glances over her shoulder at the half-finished letter on her desk. “I thought that maybe you forgot me. That you took Joan and the baby and left me.”

Her father’s jaw drops, his eyes go wide, and he holds her tight in his arms.

“No, sweetheart,” he says, tears of joy and fear and sadness in his eyes. “That would never happen. Never ever. We love you, Lizzie. So much.”

Elizabeth buries her face into the crook of her father’s neck. Quietly watching, Kurt puts a hand over his still heart.

“It’s just that the baby came early,” her father explains, “and I had to get Joan to the hospital quick because …” He stops, not wanting to frighten his daughter with the details of everything that happened – the tremendous amount of blood Joan lost, the searing agony of contractions that weren’t moving the baby along, how they almost didn’t make it.

In truth, Joan was never in any danger. Kurt’s job is to this family, and he had no intention of leaving Elizabeth’s side.

“Oh, Lizzie,” her father says softly. “I guess we all just missed each other.”

She nods in agreement, then looks up, confused. “But then, how did you know I was here?”

Her father pulls away to look at her with a crinkled brow. “You texted me, darling.” He removes one hand from around his daughter and reaches in his pocket to pull out his phone. He unlocks his screen and shows Elizabeth the message – the one she had started to send, telling him that she was home and no one was there, but then canceled since she figured it didn’t matter anyway.

“But I …” Elizabeth cuts herself off. She doesn’t want to tell her father that she hadn’t sent it, that she erased it since she believed that he didn’t care. Because she thought he had chosen a new family over her and was leaving her behind. “Can we go see the baby?” she asks instead. “And Joan?”

“Of course,” her father says. “But first, I need you to promise me that no matter what happens, no matter how hard things gets around here, if we get short and tired and act unfair when we shouldn’t, that you never forget that I love you, Lizzie.” He looks into his daughter’s eyes, resting his forehead against hers. “I couldn’t go on without you.”

Lizzie smiles. “I’ll remember,” she says, clinging on tight as her father leaves the room with her in his arms. “I promise.”

Kurt watches them go, then turns in Blaine’s arms to give him a proper hug. “Thank you,” he whispers. “Thank you for doing that for them.”

“I didn’t do it for them,” Blaine says plainly, without conceit or shame. “I did it for you, because I love you.”

“You love me?” Kurt teases, but only lightly. Blaine doesn’t show feeling. For the longest time, Kurt didn’t think he had any, but he learned, when it comes to him, somehow they’re there.

“There are millions of humans,” Blaine says. “New ones come every day. They always will, like a plague upon this planet. But there’s only one of you.”

Kurt smiles. “And I love you.”

Blaine raises a questioning brow, as best he can with a face that’s only partially flesh, mostly bone. “And would I have lost you if I decided that I couldn’t save her life?”

Kurt tilts his head. He gives Blaine a gentle kiss on the lips, and Blaine, normally stoic in the face of every kind of joy and tragedy, takes an unnecessary breath.

“No,” Kurt says, placing a second kiss to Blaine’s flesh-less cheek. “I would have found a way to forgive you.”

[terminalsonata]

Read my mistakes, so hopefully you won’t make them, too.

Specifically about my ten cats at present, but also others along the way,  It wasn’t supposed to be like this, but it ended up this way.

We came to this place with three:  Mine from when I was able to live on my own before my body crippled me, which counts at two. and the one they got when i was a teenager.  She passed away shortly after, so we were down one.

And then it began.

Warning:  I will be talking about sick cats that were unable to be made healthy, but I think it’s important to know.

To start, I want it known that, while I have lifelong experience with animals, this was the first time any of us dealt with cats from outside in this manner.  Most our animals were rescues--a cat that had all its bones broken, a Shih Tzu whose one eye was poked out, another dog that was beaten, one that was thrown out a moving car and then starved and beaten by the people who picked it up, another that was also but in a duct taped box with its litter, etc--but we got them from vets and rescue groups, with the one that was thrown out of a moving car and then beaten/starved by the people who took it, we ordered her to be given to us when we found out (it was extended family, so the dynamics were different)--but never animals we plucked out from the wild, so we had to learn.  Certain people in my life had to learn more than others.

First, a litter of motherless kittens was found by a family friend, and we fell in love with one of them.  So she brought us to three: a tabby, a tortie and now a... we don’t know what she is, but she has some siamese in her.  At this time, certain people in the household still believed in declawing.  I begged for her not to be declawed, and tried to explain what it was, and I was told that I was being stupid, that every cat they have had was declawed, and it’s not what I’m saying it is.

Yeah, guess what?  The declaw went bad, and she has bits of bone fragments that scrape inside her skin, and cause infections, and the surgery to fix it runs a risk of actually making it worse.

Declawing is now a thing no one in this household does any longer, thank fucking God.

Then, a grey and white kitten showed up on our patio one night.  He was a juvenile, not a kitten, and friendly as could be right out the gate.  It was clear he was thrown out of an abusive household based on his behaviors (afraid of getting on furniture, acting like he was about to be hit even though we were just coming in to pet him), so we took him in.

From here, we had an onslaught of unhealthy kitties that were either thrown out or were ferals that decided we were okay.

We had a set of brothers who had birth defects that had their stomachs and lungs filling with fluid, so we had to put them down.  (No, it wasn’t mega esophagus.  I was raised with a dog with that, and back then, the life span was 1 year for those animals, and we kept her alive 4 years.)  The most tragic part of this was our single neighbor had promised a woman she would take them in and keep them safe, and then just tossed them outside, so they migrated over to us where we were kind to them.

The other was a tuxedo that had been feral all his life.  Our one neighbor we have said he was sooo vicious.  He had a head injury though, so we caught him and took him to the vet.  He was nasty af right until we dumped him out of the cage, at which point he looked around and then sniffed us and it was like a light turned on, and he became hyper affectionate, so we took him in.  This rugged, scarred up cat that had clawed the shit out of our neighbor acted like he’d been a housepet his whole life.  Then, we learned that the vet didn’t test him for diseases, and when he fell ill, the vet ACTUALLY tested him and revealed he had feline leukemia.  We had to put him down.

All three are buried on our property with headstones, because they were the best cats.

After this, we adopted a black cat I named Ezio, because he’s such a ladies man with human ladies and just a huge charmer.  We’re a big fan of black cats.  When I was a child, my grandmother (an insane ol’ coot) found a polydactyl Bombay with a broken leg at like two in the morning, and we drive two hours at that time of night to get him, and he was so funny.  And fat.  My sister, who was a cop at the time, won a bet over who knew the fattest cat.  It was a disservice to him, but he loved his life.  Ezio is much sleeker and healthier, and sweet as pie.

After that, another lifelong feral became a porch cat when I finally befriended him after years of trying.  He was gentle, and sweet, and loving.  The moment it clicked for him that we were there for him was when I heard a cat scream on the property on the other side of us from our one neighbor.  No one lives there, and the owner allows us on there freely.  I loped my crippled self over, and he’d gotten into a tiff with another cat.  I coaxed him to come with me, and he walked all the way back to the patio, and from that point on, he was Sweet One, because he was a sweet, sweet, sweet boy.  He was always so skinny, and would get attacked because, as I learned along the way, he wasn’t a fighter.  He was a defender, and often lost fights.  These injuries would get so horrifically infected and I did everything I could to help him.  He eventually learned to stay on and around the patio, and the injuries stopped.  But then, one day, he got a nose bleed.  And it wouldn’t stop.  It kept going through the night, and into the next day.  He was bleeding everywhere, so we took him in.

He had feline HIV, and an infection in his nose was causing the bleeding.  So, we had to put him down, and he was buried with the other three and a Shih Tzu.

After this, things were pretty normal for a while.  We had a couple ferals that I saw here and there that would eat from the food dishes out for Sweet One, so we kept them out after he was gone.

And then one night, a kitten was spotted.

It took me months of chasing these four kittens and baby talking them, and tossing food out, then putting food in bowls, then migrating the bowls towards the patio, then onto the patio, but I was able to FINALLY earn their trust.

Two boys, two girls.  By nature, girls are usually less friendly, and the household fell in love with the boys, who were brought in and named Woody and Noctis.  They’re pudgy (particularly the glutton Noctis) and happy.

I begged for help to catch the sisters to get them spayed through the spay/neuter program for strays, and never got it.  It’s a lot of bullshit, but eventually the two got pregnant.  I told them that had they helped me, this wouldn’t have happened.  (Because I’m crippled and they’re old, it’s a case of we can’t do it alone, but we can do it together, but all they heard was, “YOU have to do this.”)

One sister, who I named Lady (because she has two eye colors like Lady from Devil May Cry) was starting to get close, and her sister (Princess, because she acts like one) was not far behind.  When they started acting uncomfortable, they allowed me to give them pets and rubs, and this solidified me as a Good Human.  Still, the household was in denial about the pregnancies until Lady gave birth to three kittens.  THEN they were invested.  THEN they helped me trap Princess.  But instead of allowing her to give birth as she was so close to doing, they shipped her off for it ‘all to be handled’.  She’s back with us now, and seems no worse for wear.  The vet who worked on her did a beautiful job on her incision.

Unfortunately, the chaos of catching her scared Lady, who hauled off back to the place on the property with no one next door with her babies, where her mother raised her, Woody, Noctis and Lady.  So I figure okay... ten weeks, and I can start trying.

Ten weeks is the normal amount of time for a cat to have weened her kittens.

Lady is different, however, the little brat.  She is the equivalent of a helicopter mom.  After it was all through and like 16 weeks later, even after she was spayed, she was still allowing them to nurse on her despite her not producing milk.

But I’m getting a bit ahead of myself.

We had a kitten trap by this time, and I was able to get close to one of the kittens--a tuxedo just like Lady and Noctis--and discovered it had a massive eye infection.  So, trapping commenced, and it was decided that he can’t go back out.  (”Trap and Release” is the name of the game with most ferals to try to control the population of cats out here.)  His eye was left damaged from the infection.  He was named Jax.

Then we got his siblings, and his mom.  They were in massive dog cages, and Lady was taken and spayed and FUCK her vet, because they did such a hack job on her compared to Princess.  I had to keep her in and on antibiotics for a week after.  Didn’t help that she liked to lay in her litter box, but...

But then we learned it was going to take f o r e v e r to get the siblings in for their fixing.  Too long for kittens that are only 17-18 weeks old at this point to handle getting released again, so it’s decided they’re staying in.

We have Jax, the one-eyed tuxedo; a solid black girl I’m thinking of naming Iris, but idk yet; and their gigantic brother I’m tentatively calling Gladio because he dwarfs his siblings in size.  He’s a gentle giant, and disturbingly really close to looking like his uncle, Woody, and his aunt, Princess, giving some haunting implications, but he’s healthy and happy and had someone just listened and helped me in the first place...

So, there you go.  I’ll leave you with a summary of advice:

- If you see a cat with a single cropped ear outside, it means they’re a feral that was taken in and spayed/neutered, then released

- If you find a feral/stray without this, then call animal/cat rescues in our area to ask about trap/fix/release programs (usually called SNIP afaik). These programs will fix cats for little to no cost and

- if the cats have good demeanors, they may bring them into the fostering programs they have to find forever homes

- If you have a feral you interact with that gets injured and immediately suffers horrific infections, you need to trap/catch them and get them somewhere so they can be tested for autoimmune diseases.  Yes, unless someone takes them in because they’re nice, this means they’ll need to be put down, but you’re saving them the pain of living with it, and saving numerous other ferals/strays from the same fate

- Never assume ferals won’t be able to turn it around and become good cats for inside the home, but don’t assume all ferals can turn it around.  Give them time to learn you and show what kind of cat they are, and

- Make damn certain if you do bring them in, you have them tested for everything if you have other cats, and make SURE the results get shown to you

Learn from my mistakes, y’all.  Tumblr’s the land of cat people, so I want to give my wisdom to those who might need it.

And a summary of cat names: Mama Bear, Ophelia, Kana, Brutus, Ezio, Noctis, Woody, Jax, tentatively Gladio, tentatively Iris

Honorary cats in the household: Two chihuahuas.

Not cats in the household:  Two dogs who are not like cats and dogs had babies.

Cats outside the household: Lady, Princess, Beeper (who is a feral I befriended over the course of four months and is also polydactyl--she has five distinguished toes on each foot, and is named Beeper because her meows are short bursts like beeps) (her ear is docked, so we know she’s spayed)

Not cats outside:  Chickens, a donkey that caused me to have surgery (and made the surgeon laugh his ass off), two horses, a mini horse, and a goat (who was also a rescue).  Two steers.

Animals. Everywhere.

[the-sapphiresky]

A Cat’s Tale

AN: Sequel to A Dog’s Life; because I’m such a sucker for people-pleasing and SO MANY of you asked for a follow up! :) 

Tobias Nicholas Hooper was not amused.

'Toby, come on, sweetie.' His Servant was trying to coax him into the Death Trap with meat and that suspicious tone she uses when she has to take him to Lucifer's Lair where they poke and prod him with lances.

Molly was on all four of those ridiculous appendages Bipedals called arms and legs. Tobias scooted back against the wall as far as he could.

She had spent the last two weeks putting all of his belongings in big, brown boxes and sealing them. He had whined endlessly and managed to claw his way through one to get his favourite blanket. She was less than happy about that and, despite general appearances, Tobias adored her and hated disappointing her. So he suffered silently as the remainder of his domain disappeared into the mysterious boxes.

But now she was trying to grab him and lock him up and his minimal tolerance for suffering was at an end.

After a scuffle in the food room, he had darted between her legs and buried himself underneath the only remaining piece of furniture in the sleeping room: the bed.

Which is where he found himself now, trying to avoid Molly's questing hand.

'Need a hand, Dr Hooper?' The heavy boots of the Perspiring Bad Man who had been taking Tobias's boxed belongings all day appeared on the other side of the bed.

Molly sighed and gave Tobias a pointed glare. 'Yes, please. Would you mind moving the bed away from the wall? It's fairly heavy but just a little would be enough for me to grab him.'

She disappeared from view and then suddenly his refuge was shifting and Molly appeared above him. He made to pounce out of reach but she was fast and grabbed him.

He yowled his displeasure.

Unhand me, peasant! He cried. But Molly ignored his command and wrangled him into the portable cell. He tried to make a run for it when she let go, but she was faster and latched and locked the gate before he could escape. He reached his paws through the bars and swiped viciously.

'Ouch!'

He tried not to feel bad about scratching her, but he wanted to remain angry and punish her for disobeying. Molly examined her hand closely and then looked at him sympathetically.

'It's going to be okay, lovey. Just a short trip to our new home. It'll be fun!'

With a growl, he sat down and glared at her dubiously.

I doubt that.

oOo

It smelled funny. Tobias shrank back in his cell as they ascended the stairs of this New Home. Although he was grateful they were no longer in the larger Death Trap, he did not like the smell of this new place. It was… bad.

The cage shuddered as Molly set it down. She knelt in front of him and smiled.

'Welcome home, Toby.'

He eyed her in betrayal. This was not home. It did not smell of home and he did not want it.

She unlatched the cage and left the gate hanging open.

'He'll come out when he's ready,' she said.

'I'll keep Blackbeard downstairs for now, let the little devil adjust first.'

Tobias hissed as soon as he heard that hated voice. It was that stupid male Bipedal! What had Molly been thinking, bringing them here to live with him! The Scowling Man always kicked Tobias off the bed and more than once had usurped Tobias's place on Molly's lap.

Absolutely not! Tobias refused to accept this turn of events.

oOo

'Molly!' The Bipedal roared. Tobias smirked and continued nonchalantly licking his paw.

'What's wrong?' Molly walked out of the back room, her hands full of Tobias's bedding. Well, she called them "jumpers", for some reason.

'That, that beast of yours, has relieved himself on my Belstaff!'

Molly frowned in sympathy. 'Oh, sweetie, he's just not happy to be here-'

'He's not the only one.'

Bite me, Bipedal Boy.

'-but he will adjust.' Molly finished with a pointed look at the Bipedal.

Sherlock huffed and glared at Tobias. 'I suppose I can call in a favour to Mrs Hudson's beau Mr Haversham to get it cleaned,' he said through gritted teeth.

Molly smiled at him. 'Thank you for understanding, my love.'

Tobias hissed in displeasure as the Bipedal received the kiss and attention from Molly he had wanted for himself.

Sticking his tail in the air, he turned and gave the Bipedal a nice message before stalking away and disappearing among the boxes stacked around.

oOo

Blackbeard whined and pawed at the door of Biscuit Lady's Home. Why had Sherlock left him down here? He could hear them upstairs. Walking about and talking. Without him. He whined again and twisted his head back to stare balefully at Biscuit Lady, who was much too preoccupied with taking more biscuits out of the Heat Monster.

But even the smell of fresh biscuits didn't lift Blackbeard's spirits.

He laid down and rested his nose on his paws and watched the door. They'd come get him. Soon. They wouldn't just abandon him.

Would they?

oOo

Tobias watched the proceedings from his perch next to a nice human skull. The perfect human. Quiet. And out of the way.

Well, he conceded, perhaps not quite perfect. Molly was perfect; quiet and cuddly, but not forcing her attentions on him when he didn't want to be petted. Their relationship had been perfect. Until the Black-Haired Bipedal intruded on it with his smelly coat and lap-stealing ways.

They had spent the day unpacking giant boxes of Tobias's things, interspersed with kissing and good-natured bickering.

It was sickening.

And now Molly was canoodling with the Beastly Bipedal on the sofa, while a huge mess lay between them and Tobias's new favourite perch. Molly was smiling at the Bipedal and talking quietly. She leaned over to kiss his cheek and Tobias swore the Bipedal smirked at him!

He tossed his head and proceeded to groom himself, pretending he wasn't entirely jealous of the attention his Human was giving someone else. No, best not let the Bipedal think he had the upper hand.

'Shall we go get him?' The Beastly Bipedal asked.

Molly bit her lip and glanced at Tobias. 'I suppose we can't put it off any longer. Maybe it won't be as bad as we think.'

Tobias watched them leave from the corner of his eye. Their footsteps faded and he paused his grooming. Curious, he leapt down and padded after them.

He was only halfway down the stairs when he heard a door open and an excited barking rang out.

A dog! Well, that certainly explained the stench around here.

Tobias' fur raised and he growled a warning in automatic defense. Below, Molly was speaking sweetly to this unseen beast in the tone she had always reserved for her beloved Tobias!

Then the barking grew louder and they appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

For a moment, all four froze. Molly and Sherlock held their breaths in grim anticipation. The Beast, an enormous basset hound, stared at Tobias in surprise. But then his ears went back and he growled.

Intruder! Intruder, Sherlock! Call John, call Lestrade!

Tobias turned tail and races back upstairs, Hades' Hound at his heels. He screeched a warning which was drowned out by frantic barking and the Bipedals' shouts to calm the Beast down.

Tobias skidded on the floor and made a sharp turn into the Food Room, leaping onto the counter and sending everything to the ground with a crash.

Back off, you classless beast!

Said Beast ignored the command and growled, Get out of my home!

It's my home now, too, nincompoop. Tobias swatted at the dog who snapped his jaws just shy of taking off Tobias' tail.

His claws scratched the skin and the Beast shrank back with a whine.

'Blackbeard, heel!' The Bipedal commanded.

Molly carefully picked her way through the mess and gathered Tobias in her arms. Tobias struggled against her hold.

Let go of me, traitor. First you befriend that curly-haired interloper, then you move in with him and uproot me from my home, and now you've decided to feed me to his Hellhound! Tobias accused her heatedly, narrowing his eyes at her.

Sherlock had calmed the Beast down, but he continued to growl menacingly. Tobias, ruffled and indignant, eventually capitulated into letting Molly cuddle him.

Her apologetic tone and soothing strokes along his spine appeased him. For the time being.

'He's just a big softie when you get to know him,' she was saying.

Tobias cried out reproachfully. That beast?! The one who tried to bite my head off and use it as a chew toy?

Blackbeard snapped his teeth menacingly. Don't tempt me, kitty cat.

Tobias hissed and struggled to get free to attack. But immediately stopped upon hearing Molly sniffle.

'Oh, Sherlock, they hate each other. Why did we ever think this could work?'

Tobias instantly forgot about the Beast and turned all his attention to his crying Human. He cried out in distress and butted his head against her chin.

Don't be sad, Molly. I'm sorry the ugly Beast made a mess.

He purred and nudged her again.

To his surprise, a whine came from the Hell Hound.

I'm sorry, too. Don't cry! I'll be a good boy, I promise!

Molly hiccuped and tears fell down her cheeks.

'Perhaps this was too much for today. Moving, spending all day unpacking, and now them,' Sherlock said. Tobias wiggled free and landed on the table as the other Bipedal pulled Molly into his arms and crooned softly as she cried.

'Why don't you take a long soak in the tub while I clean this up?' He wiped her tears with those opposable thumbs Tobias envied. 'I'll put Blackbeard upstairs for the night and we can turn in early.'

Tobias sighed in defeat at the look of pure adoration that Molly gave Sherlock. If that wasn't enough proof, the kiss she gave him solidified the fact that the Bipedal and His Beast were going to be permanent fixtures in their lives. And that this was his new home.

oOo

It was dark when Tobias nudged his way into the only room he'd yet to explore. He slipped inside and looked around to see Molly and Sherlock sleeping soundly on the largest bed he had ever seen. He wiggled his tush and pounced, landing on the soft covering.

He padded around the Black-Haired Bipedal and climbed up onto Molly's side, pushing Sherlock's arm up from where it draped over Tobias's Human and settling into the curve of her hip with a contented sigh. He still felt guilty over being partly responsible for her earlier sadness and hoped she would forgive him in the morning when she woke up. He'd learned from experience that she was more agreeable when she found him curled up beside or on her, her "cute and fluffy little man" as she called him. 

Above him, he heard the creak of a door opening and the thumping of paw-steps on the stairs. He peeked one eye open then lifted his head when the door swung further open. He let out a quiet growl when the beast, Blackbeard, walked over to the side of the bed and put his front paws on the soft bedding.

The dog met his gaze, then looked at their Bipedals forlornly. Then back to Tobias.

Molly may be yours, but Sherlock is mine. Face it, cat, we're going to have to share them.

Tobias sighed and laid his head back down. Very well. But don't think this changes anything. You're still a nincompoop.

Blackbeard smirked and lumbered onto the bed and curled up along Sherlock's legs, resting his head on Sherlock's thigh. He let out of heavy breath and his eyes started to drift shut. Tobias gave him one last warning glare before closing his own eyes.

And no snoring, Beast!