#i’m kinda sad now why didn’t i see this sooner

[in-a-faith-forgottenn-land]

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCKKKKK SHE DID NOT

[chanranghaeys]

🍊 "no promises."

pairing: idol!seungkwan x afab!reader word count: 1.2k+ tags: fluff, angst (ish) ending, comfort (ish i tried), another slice of life kinda like eavesdropping where you really shouldn’t haha, i wrote this with the idea of seungkwan going home to jeju after moonbin’s passing so if that’s smthn triggering here’s a heads up

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ masterlist . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

“do you really have to go?”

“what kind of question is that? of course i have to go.”

she sighs. “i know. i just wanted to ask something cliche.”

she looks at him and sees all the little mannerisms he does cross the expressions on his face. he pursed his lips in a pout, tucked his tongue in his cheek, bit his lower lip, and looked anywhere except at her.

“whoever you are and whatever you choose to be, i know there’s a reason why fate brought us to meet. never forget that,” he states as his hand intertwines with hers.

“even if we choose to stay in different places?” she asks as she lays her head on his shoulder. she only does this because she can’t bear to look at him.

“especially so. call me a romantic. besides, at least we’re in the same country.”

“but jeju is still jeju. seoul is still seoul.”

“and you’re you. and i’m me.”

“yes. you are you. how can i ever forget that?”

he laughs. “no, no! i mean you’re you, that headstrong and determined person i have the pleasure to be with right now. i’m just someone who happens to be an idol but really…i’m just a normal human being.”

“so am i.”

“but you’re a person who is blessed to never have a million cameras flashing and blinking in your eyes. they hurt, you know.”

“remember, you chose this life.”

he sighs. “yeah, i know.”

she stays there beside him in silence.

“on the bright side, you’ll always get to see me. just get on youtube or turn on the television.”

“it won’t compare to this.” she brings his hand closer to her lips, kissing the back of it and lingering there.

he finally brings himself to look at her. she had the back of his hand resting on her cheek this time, staring out to the distance toward the sunset.

“i’m sorry about binnie. i truly am. i never knew him but just by your stories, it felt as if he was still right here with us. just over there, in the next neighborhood, waiting for your call and we could go eat ramyeon by the beach later. i hope you returning home brought you comfort.”

“it did. it did. it made me so happy, despite the sadness. i’m reminded that everything was too fast-paced for so long—too fast that i didn’t even bother to slow down and see things for what they were. okay, i get why you decided to move here to jeju.”

“i wouldn’t have realized how fast life was going either if it weren’t for that incident. i wish it happened sooner than later, honestly. staying in seoul ain’t worth it for me.”

“that incident. yep. who would’ve thought i’d see you again after that? least especially here of all places.”

“who would’ve thought.” she finally looked up at him, finding that he had his eyes on her all along. his hood was up, the chill of the coming night blowing through their multiple layers of clothing. his round eyes were kind, his lips were turned up in a small smile. they used the cold as an excuse to get closer, wishing they would never need to come apart.

who would’ve thought that this much would happen in the span of a few weeks?

he brought his head closer to hers, partly as an attempt to keep her warm when he saw her nose and cheeks pink with the cold, and partly as a way to use his lips to kiss the chill away. he knew the warmth that spread from both your hearts when he did so would be enough to keep this cold away.

he rested his forehead on hers, taking in as much of her as he could, as long as he still could. “you know i can’t promise you anything.”

“i know. i can’t promise you anything, either.”

“is it too self-destructive of us to keep thinking this way? shouldn’t i be the happy one?”

“no, i think you’ve always been more realistic than the others. you’re just being that right now.”

“you know, i already saw my upcoming schedules for when i return. it’s almost as if i want to just hide away in my room here at home again.”

“i can’t even begin to imagine what it would look like.” she chuckles.

“you know on the calendar app how it’s supposed to be neat blocks? for some reason, they all overlap. but they work? i don’t understand it either? this is why i leave all that to the manager hyungs. practice and performing and variety take up too much of my head as is.”

“ya,” she says, using her finger to guide his chin and forcing his gaze back to hers. she starts tracing lazy circles on the apple of his cheek before he catches her hand and kisses her palm, peppering kisses down to her wrist. he couldn’t get enough of her—as he should. he couldn’t believe he was leaving her behind.

“yaaaaaa! seungkwan-ah!” she laughs in protest as he almost tackles her with kisses to her cheeks, her chin, her nose. quick pecks to her lips prevent her from saying more in between her giggles. night was falling, the street lamps started glowing. his hood was still up. and he didn’t care who he was at that moment. he was just a young man in love with a woman he saw the beauty of hope in.

when he finally stops his surprise attack, he has her in his arms and resting against his chest. “i never pegged you to be a guy all about pda, seungkwannie.”

“i’m not. it’s just…you.” his arms instinctively wrap tighter around her. she hopes he never has to let go.

“don’t forget to rest, okay?” she looks back at him to prove her point was serious. “really. do not forget to rest.”

“alright~”

“don’t do your aegyo on me! i’m serious. please. i don’t want to see you again so sad.”

“you won’t. i promise. i will rest. i will be better. for carats, for my members, for my family and friends, for binnie. for you. for myself.”

she nods in approval. “alright~”

“if you keep up with that aegyo, i will eat you alive right here.”

“oh, seungkwan, you wouldn’t. not here. not in public.”

he raises his eyebrow. “wanna bet?”

she blushes more than what the cold could do. “stop it!”

he laughs and settles in a comfortable silence having her in his arms, just like they’ve done on countless other days in the calm of jeju—the calm of the island they called home.

“i couldn’t have done it without you, you know.”

she hums in response, a small nod accompanying it.

“thank you.”

she held onto his hand tight. “don’t forget me.” tears threatened to fall.

“i could never.” more tears threatened to fall.

“we’re still in the same country.”

“exactly.”

“i’ll go to you.”

“i’d rather go to you. i get to go to jeju too.”

“you know that’s not realistic.”

“i know. i don’t care.”

“i care. i will go to you.”

“promise?”

she stays silent.

“no promises. right.” he sighs.

“i can’t promise. but i will go to you.”

“i will wait. but…no promises.”

night has fallen. the street lamps are glowing. their hoods are up. and they’re just two people in love, with no promises to keep.

[angelanderson]

I really want an Ellabs x reader fic of fem reader really needing comfort bc she's sad/overwhelmed but she tries to hide it from ellabs but obv they notice smth is off, so they tell her they noticed smth is wrong and she kinda breaks down at that, then they comfort her thru it, listening to her problems or insecurities n'stuff <33 Sorry if it's confusing and/or too long, u dont gotta do it but i'd appreciate it tons <33 (Im totally not self projecting)

ur projecting = supported. 🫢 100% sfw/comfort fic but still no men or minors. type of relationship between them is up to u! this ended up a semi- full length fic oops ? enjoy!

sometimes it just feels too hard. being the newest member in jackson means you feel like you have to prove your worth 24/7. and it’s exhausting, really. abby is just so strong, ellie has the best patrol work, and you? you feel… weak. you (falsely) feel like nothing you’ve done has proven you’re worth the space in jackson.

so when monday rolls around, you tell ellie and abby you have plans with someone else so you can just go home and hide. they don’t question that, why would they? tuesday you tell them you wanna go to bed early. okay, fine. but then it’s wednesday, and they’re starting to get that something is going on with you.

the worry starts to kick in wednesday night after maria tells the two women you asked to go home early, citing that you’re not feeling well. abby all but drags ellie to your tiny place immediately after hearing maria’s words. you always tell each other everything. so why didn’t you now?!

it’s easy to know abby and ellie are knocking at your door simply because of the sheer force of it. five minutes you try to pretend you’re not home. you don’t want them to see you in this state; you’ve been ugly crying for two hours now. however, they don’t give up. it’s not like you could expect anything else from them.

“baby, we know you’re home. let us in, yeah? we’re worried about you,” abby shouts out after another two minutes of knocking.

you respond back with a sickly voice from the sofa, “no, go away. ‘m busy.”

you can just feel the attitude enter ellie’s body now. you know how stubborn she can be. “no, we know you’re lying. i will find a way in if you don’t let us in within the next thirty seconds.”

you know she isn’t joking as you move to open the door. the sight of you upon opening the door is not a pretty one— your face is red, covered in tears. ellie takes a deep breath before she pushes in. she won’t let you shut them out anymore. abby shuts the door before them before heading you back onto the sofa with them. each other is on either side of you within the matter of seconds.

as per usual, abby is the first one to break the silence. “oh, honey, what’s going on? we could’ve helped you sooner if we knew.” the way she sounds sad just makes you feel worse.

insecurities once again bubbling over, you do the only thing you can think of: you try to shove abby away. being significantly stronger than you means it didn’t feel like a single thing. however, abby won’t put up with you lashing out right now. she knows you can be their sweet girl even in the toughest of moments.

ellie watches like a hawk as abby grabs both of your wrists to stop you from trying to push her away again. “just because you’re upset doesn’t mean you can act out. are you going to be the big girl i know you are now? or do i need to keep you here?”

the concerned sternness of her voice makes you whimper in reply. fresh tears leak down your face as you try to find the words to explain. “i- i just don’t think i deserve to be here! everyone, especially you two, carry your weight around here! and what do i do? i’m just a stupid girl working in the bar!”

and, well, neither of them could say they were expecting that response. sure, you were newer to Jackson, but so was everyone at one point. you were also one of the most popular Jackson residents— everyone loves the energy you bring to the bar after a long day of work. so it just makes sense that both women are beyond shocked to realize that this is why you’re so down. how could you not know how loved you are here?

as yet another round of tears starts to fall, you feel abby’s big arms quickly pull you into her chest. your body starts to shake with each inhale as you start to sob into abby’s chest. while ellie rushes to rub your back, abby starts to tilt your head up so you can see her.

“angel, angel, no. let’s take some deep breathes and then we’ll all have a talk, okay?”, abby coos as she wipes away the falling tears.

ellie puts your right hand over abby’s heart when your breathing doesn’t start to slow any. she speaks in the softest voice she can muster up,“deep breaths with me and abby, baby. feel abby’s heart beat. we’re all going to just relax together before anything else.”

two minutes between your favorite people is all it takes to reduce you to just sniffles. you slouch back into your seat once you’ve finally caught your breath. you look up at abby and ellie with wet eyes before letting out a long sigh. no one is sure who should speak first.

ellie decides she’ll be the one to start, “it’s not true, you know? everyone here loves you. helping run the bar is important. you create a space where we can all relax for once. emphasis on the relax part.”

abby grunts in agreement with ellie. “you know ellie’s right, don’t you baby,” abby questions before looking over to ellie, “our favorite girl’s always making everyone feel happy, isn’t she?”

“for real though, you really do play a big part here. you know ellie and i started arguing less when you came around? pretty big deal there, you know. even joel commented on it,” the dirty blonde continues on the conversation.

and that makes you giggle for the first time all day. “even joel? really?” while you knew they had a previous history of more frequent fights, you didn’t know even joel was over it back then too.

“yeah, it’s really true,” abby starts before taking a breath to think about her next words. she exhales, “strength isn’t everything, you know? you add just as much as we do here. creating a space where people can relax while we live on this hell on earth is just as important as what we do. we all do the best here because we are better with each other. our system can’t function without others.”

you’re sure you’d be crying tears of happiness right now if you weren’t so exhausted from all your previous crying. your previous anxieties start to slip away as you start to truly internalize both of their words from today. you are important. you matter here. just like everyone else.

no one is given a chance to speak before you’re pulling ellie and yourself on top of abby. “i love you, i love you, i love you both,” you whisper out. “you’re right. i promise i’ll come talk to you next time i’m feeling down, okay? know you’ll make me say that part next!”

“okay smarty pants, you better. also, we always are, darling. love you the most,” teases ellie before she presses a kiss to the back of your head.

“hey! what if i love you both the most? then what?” you’re sure you can feel ellie roll her eyes as abby whines out playfully.

“okay, okay. how about we all love each other the most? can we just agree so i can drink some water now? my head is killing me.” a major post-crying headache has just started to come on for you.

ellie rolls her eyes playful at both of you. “i’ll get us all some water”, she commands as she walks to your kitchen, “and get comfy with abby. we’ll watch a movie, and yes, you can choose today.”

yay! end note to say ur important and i’m glad ur here + love that we all each add our own special things to this earth 🫂

[brooooswriting]

Your fault pt. 2

Maria hill x reader, Natasha Romanoff x reader (past)

*knock knock knock* Maria groaned as she opened the door of her quarters, she had just come back from a very exhausting mission and was ready to go to bed. But the constant knocking was too annoying to be ignored forever.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” She asked as soon as she saw you.

“I have to talk to you. You know how after the whole thing with Nat fury didnt let me back in until I went to therapy? So I went a couple of times while you were on the mission and then this woman has the audacity to tell me that I am suicidal and careless, that I wanted to end up dead on my last mission and that the person who made me feel like that was Nat” you hurried, making it hard for the brunette to understand anything.

“Wait- what did she say about you?” She asked, very unsure if she heard you right.

“Maria! That’s not important right now” you scolded her before continuing “she made me realize that Natasha is pure toxin for me. She also made me realize that I love you. It all made sense when she hinted at the fact that you’re the place I look for comfort. Because I do, you’re the first person I wanna see and the only person I always wanna talk to. I’m in love with you Maria” you told her, a smile on your face. The first real smile she had seen in months.

“I- why don’t you come in? I don’t think I can follow you right now” the door opened further for you to come in. You hurriedly followed her to the kitchen where she poured you a glass of water while you admired her.

“So what was that about you being suicidal?” She asked again as she pushed the glass towards you. Her eyes focusing on you.

“This is what you took in? Maria, I said I am in love with you and I mean it. I’ve been to 12 therapy sessions in the last 6 weeks and in every session all I wanted to talk about was you, how you saved me, how save I felt with you and then I realized it. I let Natasha treat me like shit for so long that I didn’t feel like you’d want me as soon as I realized that I do want you.”

“Y/n, are you sure about this? I don’t want to be a rebound and I don’t want to ruin our friendship” she said, her hand lightly grazing over yours that was placed on the counter. Her smile was a mixture of happiness sadness and uncertainty.

“Maria, I’ve never been surer about anything. You are the most amazing and beautiful person I have met and I wish I would have realized sooner. If you don’t feel the same, just say so and I’ll disappear and leave you alone with this topic. Our friendship can stay the same, I promise” everybody could have heard the sadness in your voice.

“I’ve been in love with you since our first mission but two weeks later you came in with Natasha holding hands. I didn’t wanna do anything if you were happy so I shut up. But now I’m so happy that I at least stayed close” she told you, leaning in carefully. Her eyes started to close as she noticed that you were also coming closer.

You were. At least until your hand suddenly stopped her, pushing her back lightly. “I - I thought” she immediately stumbled out making you smile lightly.

“You thought right but there’s something that I haven’t told you. I haven’t broken up with Natasha yet, I know what that sounds like but I was kinda scared, you know how toxic she can be”

“What?”

“I was scared and you weren’t here so I wouldn’t have had anywhere to go. Not anywhere I felt safe at least. And I don’t want to kiss you before I’m free” your hand carefully caressed her cheek as you explained, your heart feeling lighter as soon as she leaned into your touch.

“It’s okay. I’ll be there for you every second okay?” You nodded and fell into her embrace.

That night you decided to call it quits with the redhead, now that Maria was by your side.

“Natasha, we have to talk” you said as you walked into the kitchen, placing yourself on the other side of the table while Maria waited a couple of seconds before waking to the fridge.

“What about?” She was clearly uninterested in whatever you had to say and you had to hold back an eye roll.

“I think we should break up. No wait, I am breaking up with you. We just don’t fit together anymore and I don’t want to be treated like this anymore” you told her, your voice confident as you felt safe with the shield agent behind you.

“Yeah whatever” she said and walked out of the kitchen leaving you stunned.

“It’s over” you whispered to the woman as you sat on the counter next to where she was cutting some food.

“Finally. Now i can do this” she smiled as she pressed a light kiss to your lips. “And tomorrow I wanna take you out on a real date” she whispered against them before pulling away to plop some fruit into her mouth.

That night you fell asleep in one of Maria’s shield hoodies back in your own room after years and you haven’t felt as free as you did in forever.

Three weeks later

Natasha stood alone at Tony’s party watching Maria push you against a wall to make out with you. Her heart broke as she saw you smile against the brunettes lips. She’d never forgive herself for loosing you but it was too late now.

[blessedbucky]

we tried the world, good god, it wasn't for us! (part 3)

pairing: autistic!satoru x suguru x autistic!reader

word count: ........14k? oops?

summary: a glimpse at your first year in tokyo jujutsu high

tags: autistic!reader, autistic!satoru, bisexual!reader, bisexual!suguru, ableism, internalized ableism, mentioned child abuse, light bullying, satoru has some identity issues, actually EVERYONE has identity issues here, jealous and protective boys, JJK typical violence

beautiful people who asked to be tagged 💕: @ichikanu, @iceheartsice, @anders-is-being-a-simp-again

author note: um.....so....this was meant to be all three of the high school years in one chapter........but i lost control of the plot. and here we are...FOURTEEN THOUSAND WORDS LATER...and THIS WAS ONLY THE FIRST YEAR of them in high school? help me.

translation note: jiheishō is the japanese term for autism

chapter links: ONE, TWO, AO3

[YEAR ONE.]

Graduation comes.

Finally.

In the months since you and Suguru were offered scholarships with Jujutsu High, word slowly spread around the school. Suguru and you have to sit on the roof for lunches to escape your growing popularity. You have no idea why these people have started to crawl out of the woodworks, but Suguru said he kind of expected it. It’s not only you two that want out of the village and you two are going to live the life that everyone else dreams of. They think they can worm their way into your lives now and leech off any future success or have an in inside Tokyo.

Still, you can’t believe how many addresses and phone numbers you’re given. There are a few that you keep, people from the art club that you joined who have always been cordial enough to you. You felt a little obligated because they pitched in to buy you a relatively nice art supply kit to continue your craft in Tokyo. The rest of the contact information is tossed in the trash, some right in front of their faces out of spite.

Meanwhile, Suguru is almost suspended.

No one can prove that Nakayama Izuru was attacked by Suguru, though. It’s not possible for a human to leave the claw marks on Nakayama’s arms. You can only imagine that saccharine smile that Suguru was wearing when he told the school staff that he saw a tanuki attack Nakayama. The only crime he committed was not getting help sooner and, for that, he apologized. Nakayama himself even admitted that he didn’t see anything or that Suguru didn’t put hands on him, but he knows Suguru was responsible somehow.

You, obviously, know better.

“Idiot,” you hiss when you and Suguru are at your usual afterschool hangout spot by the river. “That wasn’t very heroic of you. It could’ve costed you your scholarship if word got back to Tokyo.”

Suguru rolls his eyes. “It wasn’t even that bad. A cat could’ve done more damage than I did.”

You sigh. “I know we’ve always teased people with your collection, but we’ve never drawn blood. You don’t like him, never have, but I didn’t think it was that bad.” You throw a rock, trying to get it to skip across the water, but it just gives a sad plop and sinks. “What happened?”

“Remember when you and Endo got in that fight a few months ago?” You nod slowly. “It was something like that.” He’s not looking at you, but his rage still lingers. He’s usually good at skipping rocks, but not today. “Which means you can’t judge me because if you knew how to fight, you definitely would’ve. Don’t even try to pretend you wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, but I suck at keeping my mouth shut and can’t control my emotions for shit. I know I’m gonna struggle when we start high school because of that.” This isn’t a scolding. You’re just really worried because, “You’re good at letting that stuff roll off you.”

Suguru’s frown deepens. “Not about you.” If it wasn’t so quiet here, you’d have missed him whisper, “Never about you.”

“People have made fun of me before.”

“It’s different.” He presses a thumb against his forehead. “Can we drop this?”

“Well, I kinda want to know what he said. I told you what Endo said, didn’t I?”

“I’d rather not.”

“Suguru,” you sing. “I’ll keep asking. Don’t I have a right to know?”

“I was trying to be polite.” His eye is twitching irritably. “He said that he never noticed until now how nice your tits are. The nicest in our class.” You burst out in a fit of laughter. A vein throbs at his temple. Maybe this is why he didn’t want to say anything. “It’s not funny, Squid. It was disgusting. He tried to act buddy-buddy with me while I was waiting for you to get done with art club. He wanted to know if you were still a virgin or not.”

You shake your head, wiping a stray tear from your eye. “Nakayama thinks because his father owns the biggest farm that he’s worth something. Not even Endo would date him and she’s the most popular girl in school.” You crouch down to rummage for some skipping stones. “Hey, if we’re still virgins by the end of high school, want to take each other’s virginities?”

It’s like all the fight rushes out of him, the way Suguru sighs and how his shoulders slump in defeat. “You shouldn’t say things like that.” His neck, the tips of his ears, his entire face…it’s all so red. It’s rare to find, but there are some things that go too far. You open your mouth to apologize, but he interrupts. “You promise?”

“I promise.” You give one of the stones you find a few tosses, making sure it’s light enough. “I kind of always thought it would be you, anyway. Now that we’re leaving the village, you’ll get super popular at this new school, so I doubt you’ll be single by the time we graduate, but this is on the off chance that you are.” He tilts his head back, staring up at the skies. That’s his existential crisis face. “I’m sorry. Was that too far?”

“I always thought it would be you, too,” he admits quietly. “I guess…you’re making it sound so transactional.”

Right. Girls say that the first time is supposed to be special. “I can try to make it special for you, if it happens. I don’t really understand what special means, but I’ll try.”

Suguru shakes himself out of his thoughts. “I’ll make it special, don’t worry.”

“Don’t think about it too much. You’ll definitely get a boyfriend or girlfriend.”

“It could be the other way around, y’know.”

You scoff. “Where we’re going…seeing the spirits is normal. So, everyone there will be normal. That’s when my weirdness is really going to shine. You’re used to it. Do you think someone is willingly going to deal with my stupid habits and quirks? How do I even explain to another person that even seeing cotton balls makes my teeth hurt?” You shake your head. “I’m already high enough maintenance for you and you’re my best friend. It’d be worse for a boyfriend or girlfriend, wouldn’t it?”

Suguru says your name. You look over at him and he’s sad. “You’re not high maintenance.”

“You’re my best friend. You’re obligated to say that.”

“No, I’m not. You know I’m honest with you. Would you like an example of my honesty? Here’s one—you’re so blind that, sometimes, it amazes me.”

You throw a rock at the vicinity of his feet. He moves to dodge it. “Rude.”

***

Non-sorcerer students are required to move on campus two weeks before school starts. There will be some informal classes on the most basic of jujutsu basics to give you somewhat a foundation. In yours and Suguru’s cases, Yaga lies to both your parents and has someone come pick you and your things up three weeks before school starts.

At the nearest relatively big city, Yaga makes the driver stop. He practically shoves food down your throats, lecturing the entire time about the importance of eating to make up for the massive amounts of energy that you’ll be burning by using cursed energy and fighting spirits.

Then, he forces you both to choose cell phones.

You and Suguru, obviously from very humble means, protest. None of them are cheap. Yaga shuts you down and declares this as yet another requirement. Essentially, you’ll always be on-call, especially as you become a more seasoned sorcerer. You need a way to communicate with others and be communicated with in return. Yaga mutters something under his breath before he heads outside to take a smoke break with the driver.

“He’ll probably yell at us if we go for the cheapest thing,” Suguru mutters as he looks around the store.

“Something in the middle, then,” you agree.

In your defense, you do get something that’s not the most expensive. There wasn’t any mention about the design or color. It called to you, okay? You could take or leave the color, but the almost metallic shine of it. It’s so sleek and smooth. The number keys are nearly flat and it’s satisfying to run your fingers over the slight bump of them.

Yaga doesn’t even bat an eye when you hand over the hot pink flip phone. He simply takes what you’ve chosen, takes Suguru’s chunky option, and goes to the counter to pay for them and set up your new numbers. You and Suguru stand there, almost with bated breath.

It’s hard to believe that the school is investing so much money into you both already. Yaga didn’t even mention this coming out of your monthly stipend. A stipend, by the way, that you and Suguru weren’t aware of until you were on the road. You’d asked if you needed to tell your parents because that seemed like a pretty important thing for Yaga to forget. Yaga had shrugged and, casual as anything, said, “it’s your money now. Tell whoever you want about it.��

And, as easy as it was then for him, it is now because Yaga hands you your phones back, numbers on some paperwork, and that’s it. He walks out of the store and gets in the car. You and Suguru share a look of disbelief before you scramble to follow after him and climb in the back of the car.

It’s still a drive to a train station that will take you the rest of the way to Tokyo. The driver turns the music up. You and Suguru immediately duck your heads down, heads knocking together, voices hushed as you marvel over your new phones. You can’t stop rubbing your thumb over the smooth surface. Suguru isn’t the type to get distracted by something like texture, so he’s already clicking through it to add your phone number.

“Add me,” he demands. “What? Were you blinded by that gaudy color?”

“Like you have room to talk,” you shoot right back at him. “That’s got a MP3 built into it.”

“Are you the only one here that can be an enjoyer of the arts?”

“You could’ve kept using the radio.” You’re already a little sad. It’s a favorite pastime—you and Suguru, sprawled out on the floor, listening to the radio. Maybe you can save up for one. “Whatever. You better share the headphones whenever you figure out how to put music on that thing.”

“You better use your phone as a SOS if we’re ever lost.”

The only response to that is your harrumph and grabbing your backpack off the floor. Suguru goes back to his phone as you pull out your pencil and sketchbook. It’s a bumpy road. You already have a sketch of Hong, but maybe you’ll just do another rough one to fill the time. You flip through the pages upon pages of new and old cursed spirits that Suguru now holds, trying to find an open spot. There’s not much room left. Mother hates to buy you sketchbooks, seeing it as indulging your abnormality.

“You’re a talented artist,” Yaga commends. You pull the sketchbook against your chest instinctively. Yaga doesn’t acknowledge the action. Just asks, “Are those the cursed spirits that you’ve seen?” You lower the sketchbook back down in your lap, nodding shyly. “May I?”

You usually hide your sketchbook away from the eyes of others because classmates and adults were easily disturbed by what they thought were figments of your imagination. It’s going to take time to get over this surrealism that comes from everyone seeing the things you can and treating it as if it’s normal. So, you hesitantly hold out your sketchbook for him to take. You’re nervous as you watch him flip through the pages.

“These notes…you study them?” Yaga correctly assumes.

“Yes.”

“How?”

“Um…they can’t see me unless I want them to,” you explain slowly. “I can make them calm, too.”

“How have you been destroying them?”

“We don’t,” Suguru answers on your behalf. “I eat them.”

Yaga’s eyes widen. “You…eat them?”

“Maybe a better way to say it is that I absorb them,” Suguru corrects. “After that, I can summon them whenever I want.”

Yaga tries to hide it, but he seems…shaken. He glances back down at your sketchbook, quickly thumbing through the pages. “Is this all that you’ve taken down together? Is this how many you’ve swallowed, Geto?”

Suguru takes the sketchbook back from Yaga. Suguru is a lot more familiar with your sketches, but he skims through the pages once again. “I think this is about right,” he finally answers Yaga. “There might be more in my arsenal. Sometimes, we find spirits on our own or she doesn’t want to sketch whatever we find.”

“Right.” Yaga is nodding to himself. “We’ll explore your individual techniques more when the term starts.”

***

You’re allowed a few days to unpack and acquaint yourselves with campus before you’re taken to be fitted for your new school uniforms.

“Whatever I want?”

The tailor nods. “It’s important that you be comfortable and be in clothes that are easy for you to move in. It goes without saying that you’re a representation of the school, so you can’t be indecent, but that is your only condition,” she explains. “I’ll check-in with you after your first assignment to make sure your uniform doesn’t need any further adjustments. Also, the uniform expenses aren’t deducted from your stipend. This is on the school’s budget.”

The second that the tailor shows you the standard uniform, you turn your nose up at it. You rub the fabric between your fingers, examining it critically. The fabric, you think you could deal with, but if you can throw out the blazer then you’ll immediately jump on that chance. You’ve always preferred baggy clothes, so you shop a size or two too large. Your mother never complained because that meant your clothes lasted longer. So, you think about your wardrobe. Think about what your go-to clothes are when you’re not in a stiff school uniform.

After giving it some thought while your measurements are taken, you decide on a skirt, thin tights, and a hooded sweatshirt.

It’s an outfit that you can justify. The skirt will allow for freer movement. Tights, if they’re thin enough fabric, don’t really bother you because they’re like a second skin. The sweatshirt won’t have the same restrictive sleeves that the blazer does. Lastly, if you’re overwhelmed after assignments then you can hide under your hood.

The tailor accepts the design and tells you that she’ll call when the uniform is ready.

You’re thankful that Suguru is so tall because you’d have panicked otherwise if you stepped outside the tailor shop and couldn’t see him in front of a shop across the street. Your brows raise when you see that it’s a small tattoo shop. Outside the door, there’s a binder on a stand that must have their services and examples from their portfolio. Suguru isn’t looking at the tattoos. No, he seems to be carefully considering the section with ear piercings.

And, honestly, you’re not surprised.

“That school trip to Osorezan really left an impression on you, huh?”

It’d been the first year of middle school that your class went on a trip to Osorezan, believed to be the entrance to the afterlife. It was a religious, historical, and scientific field trip all wrapped into one since the Bodaiji temple is inside the caldera of an active volcano. The high amounts of sulfur gave the waters varying shades of blue. The land was gray and barren. But there was also a hot spring. Statues were littered around the area to represent the souls of the dead.

Just going off the limited knowledge that Yaga gave you, it makes sense that there were so many cursed spirits there. It’s a place of reverence, sure, but people probably go there out of desperation, too. On some level, it might be feared—whether because of the lore or the volcano near it.

It was an overnight trip. You and Suguru hadn’t slept a fucking wink. It was amazing. You’d adored it because of the nature and science. Suguru fell in love with the history and spirituality.

“Shut up.” The tips of his ears are red. “The tailor said there’s no dress code. Yaga said the only rule is to not bring too much attention to the school.” He rubs at his ear lobe. “It looks really cool, doesn’t it?”

“I think you’re being a stereotypical smalltown kid that’s going wild in the big city,” you deadpan.

“Well, I’m doing it. If it bothers you so much then stay out here,” he says primly.

You’ve started to flip through the pages of piercings. “No, no.” There’s one thing that caught your eye. You touch the picture of a tongue piercing. “Just think it’s a little funny that as soon as your feet stepped down in Tokyo, you went running.” Do your eyes glaze over when you think about running the little metal ball of a piercing across your teeth? Maybe. “I want this one.”

“Eh? I’m just getting gauges. You’re getting way wilder than me. You understand that, right?” Suguru is grinning as he grabs your wrist. “Let’s go.”

***

A week later, your tongue has healed enough that you finally learn to talk around it. Just as you suspected, the urge to roll it between your teeth is hard to pin down while you let it fully heal. It’ll be another three to five weeks. Yaga never said a word about it when you both showed up to a classroom the next day. All he did was throw some textbooks at you both and got to lecturing.

You guess you need to start thinking of him as sensei.

Suguru talks about you being a huge nerd, but he’s the one that’s in the school library, trying to dive deeper into…everything that you’ve learned, basically. Despite the fact that you’ll be spending the next three years gaining more knowledge about the jujutsu world. He’s always been like that—impatient when he’s eager. Well…maybe he picked that up from you.

Anyway, you left him behind to enjoy the weather and view. If you’re not with Suguru, you’re enjoying the view. The campus is nestled on a mountain outside Tokyo. It’s got the kind of scenery that inspires a person. This is the first time, probably ever, that you draw things that are not cursed spirits. That’s what you’re doing now. You have an urge to draw the contrast of the bright red torii gate against the lush, green foliage.

You almost lose your art supplies to gravity when someone rushes in front of you. Not that you’d say anything, but you can send them a shitty look. You’re a little more forgiving when you see their vision is blocked by a big box. Another person follows with another equally big box follows after that person. You blink and look in the direction of where they’re coming from.

A group has made their way to the top of the staircase that leads up to the school.

They are…very bright.

Almost everyone in the small group has blinding white hair and blue eyes. Not only that, but they are also dressed in traditional clothes that you know are expensive. The colors are vibrant. Just from here, you can tell just one of those kimonos probably costs more than your childhood house. Every woman in the group has a gold kanzashi in their hair with a dangling charm in the form of a…is that a dragonfly?

Off to the side of this group, though, is a boy your age. Same white hair and blue eyes, yes, but he’s dressed so casually that it’s almost obscene next to the rest of his people. Just a white shirt, pair of basketball shorts, and some sneakers. Thismust be one of your two classmates. Yaga said there would be another boy and girl enrolling. And…he must be moving on campus early. You wonder why. Clearly, those people are his family and they’re loaded. Why on earth would he want to leave home early?

The classmate stops and turns to stare at you dead-on. Don’t come over here, don’t come over here, don’t come over here, you silently plead. You weren’t prepared to deal with other people yet. It’s still a new place and new information is constantly getting thrown at you and you just don’t have the mental energy to deal with strangers.

Fate is not on your side, though, and your classmate closes the distance between you and him.

You’re wary when he’s right in front of you. If you weren’t desensitized by Suguru, this guy’s height would definitely intimidate you a lot more. You’re still nervous which could be because he’s really close to you physically. Your body tenses, instinctively preparing for unwanted touch.

“Show me around.”

“Huh?”

“Show me around,” he repeats.

Okay. You’re not sure what you expected. Normally, people give a little context when you question what they say. “I’m new, too. Our sensei is here, though. His name is Yaga.” You tilt your head slightly. “I can go grab him instead.”

“I asked you. You’re one of those shy types, right? Probably not good with talking to hot guys? I figure you won’t talk while we walk around the place.” He says all that…so casually. “I’ve had that hag back there in my ear all day. I got a headache. If you wanna keep talking, though, I’ll just go find someone else.”

“The only other person here will tell you to fuck off if you go around making demands like this,” you state bluntly. Actually, you wouldn’t be surprised if he ended up punching this guy in the nose. “Look, I come off as rude, too, but you should maybe think a little longer before you speak.” Oh, no. You sounded like Suguru just now.

The guy squints at you. “Who the hell are you? Where you from? Do you not know who I am?”

Oh. Yaga warned you and Suguru about this in a roundabout way. The jujutsu world is super traditional. There are these three clans that have been around for hundreds and hundreds of years, so they’re really respected. They’re competitive with each other and try to pump out more talented sorcerers. They tend to turn their nose up at people like you and Suguru who have no hint of sorcery in your family or ancestry.

You give him your name, the prefecture you came from, and then answer with a curt, “No, I don’t know who you are. Should I?”

He clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes. “So…you’re a hick. That’s what your deal is?” Hmm, well, he’s technically not wrong about that. “Whatever. I’m Gojo Satoru. You can ask the Yaga guy about how important I am later. Can we go now?”

You could not follow Gojo when he walks past you, but his…family or whatever is taking up the space that you were going to use for your art. Also, you can sympathize with needing an excuse to get away from a large group of people, especially when you’re overwhelmed. Not saying that Gojo is, but he did mention a headache.

So, you and Gojo take a stroll.

It’s quiet, aside from the sounds of nature and your footfalls. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see his head turn in your direction. What? Is he shocked that you respected his wish to be quiet? You don’t want to force a conversation.

After maybe half an hour of walking, you declare, “I think we’re far away enough that you don’t need me anymore.” You point at the bench in front of a pond that you purposely led yourselves to. “So, I’m going to do what I was going to do.” You give a polite half-hearted bow. “It was nice to meet you. I look forward to working with you in the future.”

Suguru texts as soon as you sit down, asking where you went off to. You’re terrible with directions, so you send him a shot of the pond and the building closest to it. You don’t mention Gojo. You’ll tell him about it later. Your fingers glide over the hard cover of the new sketchbook and the fresh, crisp, blank page that you turn to. You treat this sketchbook carefully because it’s the nicest you’ve ever seen.

Yaga said that it was very important to nurture your curiosity in understanding cursed spirits, so it was a more than worthy investment to get you sketchbooks. The more knowledge that you gain about the jujutsu world, the deeper your understanding of them goes, and that can be helpful to the jujutsu world. No one has ever had an ability like yours that he knows of, Yaga had told you privately. Knowledge of cursed spirits is only gained in the heat of battle or the aftermath of death. Your pacification abilities allow the study of cursed spirits without the bloodshed.

In that meeting, you’d tried to make Yaga see some sense. You’re some nobody from nowhere with a weird fixation on drawing the cursed spirits. He has all these big aspirations for you, but you highly doubt that you can live up to them. It wasn’t even about the sketchbook at that point. Suguru’s technique is the one that will change the world.

With you and Suguru, I think your techniques have skewed your worldviews. Suguru has shown me some of his higher-grade spirits. Exorcising those would be bloody work for anyone else. Your technique is more suited for a supportive role, yes, but don’t dismiss your power. It’s a trickle-down effect—you’ll save the lives of fellow sorcerers who will go on to exorcise spirits that saves the lives of current and future non-sorcerers.

You’d definitely cried after that conversation with Yaga. No one has ever wanted to…foster your interest like this. Setting aside how disturbed they were by the content that you drew, they saw no use in it. It was fine as a child, but in the past year or so, they had outright started to scold you for not putting the pencil down. You were the daughter of farmers and would never be famous for your art, so you needed to invest in better skills. Even your art teacher wanted to censor you and told you that any drawings needed to be school-appropriate.

More dedicated than ever, you’ve been almost obsessive with drawing.

“Oi.”

You’ve literally only drawn the rough shape of the pond. You try not to sigh or let your irritation at being interrupted show on your face when you tilt your head up. “Yes?”

“What if I did want a tour?”

It was obvious from the get-go that Gojo is a blunt person, so you don’t lie out of politeness. “I still get lost, so I’m the wrong person to ask. Like I said before, go ask Sensei.” You drop your attention to your lap and start sketching again. “Besides, I’m not good at talking to people.”

“It’s not like we have to chat. Just tell me the buildings.”

“Didn’t you say you have a headache?”

“Yeah, but I always have a headache.” That’s…alarming. You look back up at him, concerned. He shrugs and says, “Six Eyes,” as if you have any idea what that is supposed to mean. “Ugh. Right. Small town girl or whatever.” Then, he tries to dismiss it all with, “It’s a Gojo clan thing. I have special eyes that make my technique better, but the cost is migraines.”

Oh. It’s like Suguru’s technique, then. In the sense that there’s a massive blowback. Suguru has told you about the taste of curses and how disgusting doesn’t even come close to describing how awful it is. He tries to pretend that the taste is the only bad thing about it, but there’s a reason why he would wait until night to eat them where he could lay down immediately after. He’s even admitted that he would eat them to make his body forget about its hunger.

You’re sympathetic to the sensitivity. There are days when an overcast is still too bright. You bought a pair of sunglasses while you were out with Suguru, but…you can always get more. You have a whole monthly stipend now. Also, you got your uniform and you’re wearing it, so you can use the hood if the light is too much.

“Here.” You pull the sunglasses from where they’re perched on the top of your head. They’re a simple pair with thin silver frame and blue, circular lenses. Gojo looks between you and the sunglasses that you have held out. You hesitate. “What? Are they too girly or something?”

“Uh…no. I…” He looks genuinely perplexed. “You don’t know who I am. Why are you giving me these?”

“My senses are stupidly delicate, too. I know what having a bad day feels like. I don’t need these today, so you can have them. I can go buy new ones if I need them.” Oh! You remember something important and inform him, “I’ve worn them inside and Yaga doesn’t care, so you’re good on that front.”

Gojo takes the sunglasses from you but doesn’t put them on yet. “Inside?”

Oops. “Sorry. I forgot that people are weird about sunglasses inside.” You tap your pencil against the sketchbook, trying to figure out how to say what you want to. “I don’t really understand what the issue there is. Sunglasses are designed to help when it’s too bright. Inside can be as bright as outside, so I’m just using them for their intended purpose. That’s how I see it.” Oops again. You started rambling. “I’ll take them back if you don’t want them. You didn’t seem like the type to care about the opinions of others, is all.”

“No, I want them.” He yanks them away when you try to take them back. “I—”

“Hey!”

Suguru’s normally soft voice raising like that makes you yelp and jump in your seat. You whip your head around to see him storming toward you, fists and jaw clenched. You’re alarmed to see him so visibly angry. You scramble to stand up and meet him in the middle. “Suguru?”

“Aren’t you too old to be picking on people?” Suguru asks with narrowed eyes. He’s looking over your head, at Gojo. “Give those back to her.”

Oh! Now, you understand. To someone else, it would look like Gojo stole your sunglasses and is trying to keep them away to be a bully.

“Suguru, no. It’s okay—”

“Heh!” Gojo’s cocky laugh makes you angle your body so you can look between them both. He smirks smugly and makes a show of putting on your sunglasses. “Who are you? Mommy?” Gojo shoves his hands in his pockets, feigning nonchalance. “I didn’t steal them, so calm down, mama bear.” Gojo points at Suguru while asking you, “This the guy that’s gonna tell me to fuck off if I don’t find some manners?”

“I’m certainty thinking about it right now,” Suguru sneers. His anger simmers back down and he goes back to his polite yet cool indifference. He ignores Gojo’s obvious baiting and moves his attention to you. “Is that true? Did you give those to him?” You nod. Suguru frowns. “You just bought those.”

“I was trying to be nice to our new classmate.” Suguru’s brow twitches in irritation—probably over the knowledge that this is one of your two classmates. Gojo has not made a good first impression, to say the least. “It’s no big deal. I can buy some new ones when we go to the konbini.”

“Eh? I want to go!” Gojo whines.

Suguru forces a polite smile. “You should stay here. I’m sure that Sensei will have some things to go over with you.”

“I don’t know how to get back. Sketch here was showing me around.”

“Sketch?” Suguru and you repeat, in unison.

“Yeah! Sketch!” Gojo motions towards your sketchbook that you left on the bench. “Because you’re an artsy girl.”

“You should know someone longer than an hour before you go giving them nicknames,” Suguru lectures.

Gojo cocks his head to the side, genuinely confused. “Should you?”

“Yes. Otherwise, it’s just being presumptuous.”

“Ask the lady, then.” Gojo hunches over, prowling toward you with a mischievous grin, getting very close to your face with his. “You don’t mind it, do you…” He lifts his head, purposely baiting Suguru when he adds, “…Sketch?”

Now, you may not be the best at social cues or reading the room, but even you know that whatever you say is going to be the wrong thing. Do you actually care about the nickname thing? No. Also, is Suguru forgetting that he literally gave you the Squid nickname only after a week? Sure, you were both six and he forgot your name, but the point stands.

“I think I’m in the middle of a dick measuring contest,” you muse aloud. Suguru sighs in exasperation while Gojo gives a delighted laugh. “I’m going to walk away now.”

“Yes. We should go,” Suguru agrees through gritted teeth.

As you and Suguru are walking away, after you’ve gathered all your things up, Gojo loudly asks, “Aren’t you gonna introduce yourself?”

Suguru understands, on some level, that it would be beneficial to get along with your peers since there’s only going to be four of you in the whole class. That’s why you’ve indulged Gojo’s…neediness? Entitlement? Whatever it is. And Suguru won’t be as nice as you—which is ironic because he’s usually the polite one—but he does turn around and introduce himself with a curt, “I’m Geto Suguru.”

“Gojo Satoru,” Gojo shoots back cockily. “Aren’t you going to tell me how much you look forward to working with me?”

“No.” Ah. Suguru’s patience has reached its end. “We’re leaving now.”

***

It’s not until about a week later, one week before the term starts, that you actually see Gojo on campus. This isn’t to say that you’re not painfully aware of what Gojo has been up to. Because what his purpose in life seems to be right now is to dig his way under Suguru’s skin. While in separate rooms, they still share communal spaces—kitchen, showers, laundry. Suguru tries to stay in his room, but they’re bound to run into each other, and when they do…

Well, you learn that there are alarms imbued in the protective barrier around campus that blare when a cursed spirit is detected within. Spirits from Suguru’s collection are no exception. That unexpected noise had you in a panic. Suguru and Gojo had an extremely long lecture and were forced to clean the already pristine classrooms as punishment.

You’re making your rounds on the track. Sensei recommended it since you’re not nearly as in shape as Suguru. He was trusted to work in the fields back home way more than you were. The most that you were trusted to do was wash picked crops. You weren’t even allowed to pick out the bad crops because you took too long. You’re a perfectionist and kept questioning if you should let a crop slip through or not.

Gojo plops down on the stone staircase that leads down to the track and field. You feel like you should ignore him out of loyalty to Suguru, but you can’t do that here. You have to try and get along with your classmates. You leave the lectures to Sensei and hope that Suguru’s temper will cool down with time. Also…Gojo is waving a second popsicle in the air to get your attention and it’s really tempting. Too tempting.

You wordlessly take the popsicle and examine the flavor. It’s red bean. You’re instantly wary. “Did you get the same?” Gojo flashes the reddish tinted popsicle in answer. He shoves it back in his mouth before you can get a good look. Fine. You’ll just ask outright. “Does it have pieces of red beans in it?”

Gojo scowls. You think you’ve offended him for asking too many questions about his gift, but it turns out that he’s actually upset about something else entirely. “No! Ew! What am I? A heathen?” His nose scrunches up in disgust. “Dude, that’s so gross. Who like chunks in their ice cream? The whole point is for it to be creamy and smooth!”

You almost sigh in relief. “I think sprinkles are okay, but…yeah. Everything else is too much.”

“Ugh, no. Sprinkles are too chalky. They leave this…eh…it’s like a film kind of feeling on my teeth. I hate it. I have to scoop it off any desserts which pisses me off more because I love whipped cream and I’m losing it to fucking sprinkles.”

You nod sagely. “A waste of good food.”

“Thank you! You get it!” Gojo sighs dramatically. “You’re so much cooler than your boyfriend, Sketch!”

“Because I agreed with you about dessert preferences? Also, Suguru isn’t my boyfriend. He’s my best friend. We’ve lived in the same village all our lives. There was no one else like us. People that could see cursed spirits, I mean.”

Gojo is still wearing the sunglasses that you gave him. You can’t tell that he’s looking you over until he allows them to slip down the bridge of his nose. “Really? He acts like a possessive boyfriend, though.”

You rub the back of your neck. “We’re protective of each other because of…other private stuff.” You know not to put Suguru’s relationship with his parents on blast. “Oh, and he says he’s not, but I think he’s protective because of my diagnosis.”

“Diagnosis?”

“Jiheishō,” you answer casually between licks of your popsicle. “I was always weird as a baby and a toddler. Then, I talked about seeing things, and that pushed my parents over the edge. They took me to a doctor, and I got diagnosed.”

“Huh. What’s that like?”

“I don’t know. It’s who I am. How do you explain being?” You pause. “I would say that you could ask Suguru since he’s on the outside looking in, but…you’re being an annoying dick to him.”

Gojo cackles. “But he makes it so easy!”

“I’m not one to assume because it’s hard to know what people think or I don’t understand them the right way, but…have you ever tried to make friends before? If I didn’t already know that you have to go to a school, I’d ask if you’ve even been around other people your age. This isn’t how you get along with your peers.”

He scoffs. “Why do I need to get along with my peers? Why do I need friends?”

“Because it’s lonely and miserable without them?”

“Ha! You ever stop to think that it’s lonely and miserable with them?” There’s a bitter twist to his mouth. He nudges the sunglasses back up the bridge of his nose, hiding his eyes away. “I mean, you said it, didn’t you? It’s such a chore to figure out how other people work and what they’re thinking. Normies are too…normal. Clan kids are only sucking up because my clan is the most powerful. It’s stupid and complicated. Why bother?”

Oh. That’s…sad…and also way too relatable. Your expression softens. “Those aren’t friends, though. You know that, right? I guess my opinion might not count because I only have one friend, but…he’s made my life better. I like to think that I’ve made his better, too.” He sticks his tongue out in disgust. You shrug. “It’s true. He’s been the only person that listens to me when I can’t shut up about art styles or cursed spirits because I’m really interested in those. I can be me around him.”

“You’re probably not as annoying as you think you are,” he dismisses. “Now, I’m annoying. I can’t shut up about Digimon.”

“You’re probably not as annoying as you think you are,” you repeat mockingly. He flips you off and you smirk in response. “Do you want to talk about it with me? I’ll listen. It sounds like you’ve been around shitty people that don’t want to hear about things that make you happy.”

Gojo is actually…hesitant. That makes you even sadder. You know this all too well. “I yap a lot. Seriously.”

You make yourself laugh past the hurt you feel out of sympathy for him. “I’ve got my sketchbook with me. I’ll show you what real yapping is.”

It’s the right thing for you to say. Putting a competitive spin on it makes it easier for Gojo to be open, it seems. “Oh, you are so on, Sketch.” He rises to his feet with a renewed excitement. “You should come help me finish unpacking! I have a lot of Digimon stuff, so it’ll be easier to explain everyone with that!”

“Eh? Are girls allowed—”

Gojo doesn’t hear you. He snatches you by the wrist and you stumble to keep up with him. You’re halfway to the boys’ dorm before he finally listens when you tell him that he left your sketchbook behind. You watch him sprint back toward the track, still trying to figure out how the hell you ended up here.

Suguru loves to read, but not manga. There was only one television in your house that your parents always had control of, so they never let you watch anime. Obviously, you know that Digimon is a manga and anime. It’s big like Pokémon. You know there are little creatures, but that’s about the extent of it.

Gojo changes that.

It’s a little confusing, sure, but you like hearing people talk about the things they like. Maybe it’s because you’re so used yourself to the rejection of being shut down because you’re boring people by talking about the same thing or overwhelming them with talking too much or liking weird things. You don’t want other people to feel like that. It was obvious from Gojo’s demeanor that it’s something he’s experienced, too.

As you look at all the figurines and manga and plushies, you wonder if his family threw money at this thing he likes and left him alone with it all. You don’t think he would be so cynical about other people if he had support from his family. Would you be okay if you parents paid for the most expensive art supplies in the world and left you to it? You prefer to be alone, but…isn’t this special interest more special when you can share it with someone?

“Squid?”

You and Gojo are both in the middle of his room, on the floor, and currently have your faces shoved against his little plushies that are shaped like the first evolution of the original Digimon set. It’s so soft and squishy. Gojo is really proud of finding them and you can’t blame him. It’s cool that he’s not afraid to have cute things like this like a lot of guys are.

“Oh. Hey, Suguru.” You look over your shoulder at him, a little nervous. Before he can grill you about being alone with his unofficial rival, you quickly explain, “I’m getting informed about Digimon.” You spin around on your ass, shoving the plushy out. “Come feel this. It’s so soft.”

Suguru scowls. “No.”

“No is right!” Gojo loudly agrees. “He’s not allowed to the nice stuff!”

“Girls aren’t allowed in our dorm,” Suguru says more to Gojo than you.

“It’s fine until dark. I already asked Yaga.”

Suddenly, there’s a tension in Suguru’s shoulders. His jaw clenches and his eyes narrow at Gojo. “Why do you know that?”

“Shouldn’t you be happy about this news?” Gojo shoots back, a clear deflection. “You can hang out with her now.”

Suguru presses a thumb to the center of his forehead. He holds that position, trying to calm himself down. When he does, he moves his attention back to you. “He didn’t pressure you to come in here, did he?”

Before Gojo can open his mouth, you swing the plushy back to hit him. The way he sputters and Suguru’s proud smirk is a sign that you hit him right in the face. “I can make decisions on my own,” you tell Suguru which wipes that little smirk right off his face. “We’re doing a show and tell…kind of. You should bring your headphones and let us listen to your music!”

“I didn’t consent to this!” Gojo complains.

This going back and forth is a little annoying, so you angle your body to face them both. To Gojo, you say, “Okay, that’s your call. This is your stuff, after all.” To Suguru, you ask, “Um…I’ll meet you in an hour? We can listen to your music then. Does that sound good?”

Gojo groans. The excitement to share outweighs his need to annoy Suguru because he concedes with an exasperated, “Fine! He can come hang out!”

“Fine,” Suguru agrees with the same amount of annoyance.

But, hey, a win is a win.

***

The last of your class moves in a few days before the semester starts. It’s early in the morning when she does, so the noise in the hallway startles you awake, and you go stumbling out of your room without a second thought to how you’re dressed. Your door opening catches your roommate’s attention and she’s looking in your direction when you walk in her line of sight.

Both of you stare wordlessly at one another. There’s a beauty mark under the corner of her eye that catches your attention before anything else. Her brunette hair is cut short, barely past her chin, and her bangs are swept to the side. You’re watched by curious, brown eyes. At first glance, you think she’s got a cigarette in her mouth, but it doesn’t have the filter on the end. It might be one of those chalky candy sticks.

“Oh! You’re so pretty!” You blurt the words out before your sleep-addled brain can catch them. Heat crawls up the back of your neck and the tips of your ears. “Sorry!”

She laughs good-naturedly. “What? Should I be offended by a pretty girl giving me compliments?” And how…do you react to that? No one has ever called you pretty before. She unintentionally throws you a bone by moving the conversation somewhere else with her name. “I’m Ieiri Shoko. Nice to meet you.”

You give her your name, bow, and the same polite, “Nice to meet you, too. I look forward to working with you.”

“We’re living together now. You don’t need to be all formal.” It’s a force of habit. You learned quickly as a child that the world revolves around politeness and manners. “Sorry for waking you.”

“That’s okay.” You hesitate. “Do you need help?”

“Please. My parents bailed. I’m lucky they even had the time to drop me off. Not sure how they even had the time to pop me out with how busy they are at the hospital.”

You’re rolling up your sleeves as you walk over to her door. “They’re…doctors?”

“Surgeons, yeah,” she answers casually. “Makes sense that I ended up with the technique that I did, even if no sorcerer in our family has ever had it. We’ve always been big on healing, or so my parents have told me.”

“What’s your technique?”

“Reverse Cursed Technique, but I can use it on myself and others. It’s rare to extend it to other people.” Your blank expression has her chuckling. “You’re from a non-sorcerer family, huh?”

Your face is back to being hot again. “Sorry. Sensei…um…I don’t think he went over that yet.”

“I’m not sure that he will. It’s advanced. Even among the best, strongest sorcerers, it’s a rare skill. Baby sorcerers only know about it because it’s a thing to aspire to, y’know?”

Whoa. “What is it? You must be really powerful, right?”

Ieiri laughs. “No way. Reverse Cursed Technique alone is healing yourself. Like I said, I can take it further and heal others. Oh, and I have this…ability to find disturbances in the mind and body.” Then, she puts her ability in practice. “I know you got your tongue pierced.”

Your fingers fly up to touch your lips. “And you think that’s not powerful?”

“Flatterer.” Between all your back and forth with her, you’ve both gotten all the boxes inside her room. She flops down on the bare mattress. “What’s your technique?”

“Nothing as cool or useful as yours, I think.” You rock back and forth on your feet nervously. “They don’t see me unless I want them to. Also, I can pacify them. Nothing more than that. I only make them calm.”

“Guess we’ll both be saving lives.” There it is again. Someone can see more purpose in your technique than you can. Your brain just can’t compute with that. You’ll just…stand there and pacify spirits. It seems like so little to save actual lives. “Are our other classmates here yet? Have you met them?”

“Yes. One of them is my best friend, actually. His name is Geto Suguru. We came from the same village and he’s from a non-sorcerer family, too. Please be patient with both of us. And our other classmate is Gojo Satoru—” Ieiri groans loudly. You smile meekly. “I guess you know that his family is important?”

“If you have even a hint of sorcery in your family, you know about the big three clans, so, yeah, I know. My parents have never been active sorcerers, but they’re in the know of the community. No one has been able to shut up about the Gojo heir since he was born. I think my parents said it’s been…hundreds of years since someone was born with the Six Eyes?”

You nod. “Right. He said something about that. They’re special.”

“That’s an understatement.” There’s a lull in the conversation and, in the silence, you hear a familiar noise. It didn’t come from you. Ieiri laughs, no hint of shame at her stomach outing her. “I guess since I woke you up that you haven’t had breakfast. Want to grab something to eat? My parents didn’t give me time to eat.”

Your brows furrow. “They’re doctors. Shouldn’t they be more worried about your nutrition?”

Ieiri just starts laughing.

***

The school term starts.

Suguru and Gojo still aren’t getting along well. It almost seems worse because when actual schoolwork starts, they’re essentially tied on their marks. In regard to their techniques, while Gojo has more cursed energy, Suguru has more refined control. Suguru also takes to martial arts extremely well and Gojo, who you’re sure has been touched even less than you have, is almost always overcome when they spar. Gojo is faster than Suguru and is learning to use that to an advantage.

As for you and Ieiri, you hope that she likes her as much as you like her. It’s…easy to be around her. You admit that you had a lot of issues with her deadpan sense of humor, but she seemed to catch on quickly and now will usually tell you if she’s joking or being sarcastic. There are also some hiccups with food because you two share cooking duty, but she starts learning what textures you hate and which you love.

In your studies, you do okay, but you’re last in the class. If Ieiri wasn’t so lazy, she’d give the guys a run for their money. You are a lot more in shape than her despite your larger size and you lay her out flat in sparring. Yaga declared that you and she would be mostly non-combatant sorcerers due to the nature of your techniques, but he insisted that you and she learn martial arts for self-defense. Actually, you’re more in shape than Gojo even. Suguru is leagues ahead of you, obviously, because he’s so much more coordinated and stronger.

About a month in, you’re given your first assignment.

And by you what you actually mean is yourself and Gojo.

In the last few years, the number of cursed spirits has been steadily increasing. There are two separate incidents with relatively low-level curses and all the higher-grade sorcerers are occupied with higher-level curses, so you and your classmates are split up in teams of two.

Suguru was not happy about the pairings, but Yaga said that you and Suguru know how to work well together already. Then, kind of bitchily, Yaga explained that if Suguru and Gojo got along better then Yaga would’ve simply had them handle both batches themselves. Later, you try to reassure Suguru by reminding him that there’s going to be a more seasoned sorcerer with you—the newly graduated Kusakabe Atsuya. You don’t think it made him feel better.

Kusakabe will meet you there. On the way to meet him, you ask Gojo, “Should we…come up with a plan?”

“Why?”

You fiddle with the metal aglet on the ends of your hooded sweatshirt’s drawstrings. “I would feel better if we did.”

“We don’t even know the layout of this place,” he points out.

“Right,” you mumble. You’d forgotten about that, honestly. “You’re right.” You slip the aglet in your mouth and chew on it nervously.

Gojo huffs. “You stop it. I blow it up. Simple as that.”

“Can I draw it first?”

“Hah?”

You squirm uncomfortably. Hesitantly, you show him your old sketchbook. You kept it in case you come across a similar cursed spirit and need to compare notes. You’ve also got your new, blank sketchbook to start a new, more official record. “I like to study them,” you explain timidly. “It’s…kinda like my Digimon…I guess…”

Gojo takes the sketchbook from you, casually flipping through the pages. “Why cursed spirits, though?”

“Why’d you pick Digimon instead of some other anime?” You shrug nervously. “It’s hard to explain. At first, I thought some of them looked really cool. I made myself get better at art so that I could draw them, in case they were exorcised somehow. Then, I wanted to know how they got those shapes. It became about their behavior next. I’ve always loved mythology and animals, too, so maybe that influenced the interest a little.”

“Hmph. Alright. I’ll try to hold off on blowing it up.” Before he turns his head away, you notice a pinkness on his cheeks. “You can talk about them with me, if you want. Like…how I talk about Digimon and stuff.”

You duck your head, face hot. “Thank you.”

The assignment doesn’t take long at all. It may take more time for you to sketch the spirits than it does for Gojo to blow them away. There were a lot of them. They all took the same form which was vaguely pufferfish shaped. You know that the weaker, tinier spirits tend to group up, and these were no different.

Their behavior around Gojo was the odd thing, though. Unless the spirit is a higher grade, spirits never reacted to Suguru when you were around. It’s not like that with Gojo. He’d held back to let you sketch, but when he stepped toward you, the group started to shift restlessly in their places. Then, when he got too close, they shot their spines out. If Gojo hadn’t dashed forward and tackled you to the ground, covering you with his Infinity-lined body, you would be a porcupine.

“It was fascinating!”

Suguru looks faint as you recount your assignment to him over dinner. You made sure to pick up something light for him since eating curses fucks with his stomach. You got him some onigiri for the morning when he’ll be ravenous, making sure to mark them as yours before you tuck them in the communal fridge. Hopefully, it’ll succeed in tricking Gojo because you have no doubt that he’d eat them to antagonize Suguru.

“I wonder what it is about Gojo that freaked them out like that,” you mutter to yourself. “You’re as strong as him. Do you think you have some sort of calming effect on them because of your technique? Or what if they can sense the spirits inside you and it confuses them?”

“No more thinking tonight, Squid,” Suguru declares and closes your sketchbook. “We have three years to figure out both our techniques.”

“Fine.”

“Well, now you just sound like Gojo with that bratty attitude.”

“It’s not bratty! It’s called being a nerd.”

Suguru gives a shake of the head as he laughs. “You can be a nerd and a brat at the same time.” You watch him start to clean up the empty food containers. His face is doing something…weird. You can’t pinpoint this particular emotion. “Squid…are you up for touch today?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Can I hold you?” Suguru, uncharacteristically vulnerable, goes on to admit, “I was worried about you today.”

“If anyone was worried, it was me. You didn’t have me there to calm the spirits down.” You two ate while sitting in the floor, so you hold your arms out to him like the brat that he accused you of being. “C’mon. I never get Suguru hugs anymore. I really miss them.”

He smiles, a little shy. “Brat.”

“No. I’m Squid, remember? You never let me forget.”

For some reason, your brain replaced hold with hug. You’re fully expecting him to help you up and give you something quick, but he doesn’t do that. He drops in behind you, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you back between his open legs. You squeak at the manhandling and your heart starts to beat faster. When your back is against his broad chest, he slips both his arms around your middle, and leans his chin on the top of your head with a happy sigh.

“Oh,” you whisper unthinkingly.

Suguru mistakes your tension with overstimulation. “Is this okay still?”

“Yes.”

Why are you so nervous? You’re not being bombarded by stimuli, so it can’t be because of that. Actually…it feels really good to be in his arms. He’s always so warm. You feel as if his arms are all-encompassing. It makes you feel safe. It makes you feel loved. And Suguru should be feeling that way, too, so you need to push away this weirdness inside you. You twist around in his arms, putting yours around his waist, shoving your face against his hard chest.

“Squid hugs are the best hugs,” Suguru whispers.

***

“Do you know how to help with a broken nose?”

You’re in the library when Sensei appears in the doorway and asks that almost ominous question. Slowly, you put the book back on the shelf, eyeing Sensei warily. He simply looks back at you, exhaustion seeping from every pore. The resignation you see in him is familiar, too. The pieces quickly add up. The air around Sensei paired with the cryptic text that came from Suguru with only a simple apology…

Oh, no.

“I can plug up the nosebleed and make an ice pack,” you answer with an equally tired sigh.

Sensei nods and gives a curt thanks. Before you and he go your separate ways, you sheepishly ask if you can talk to Suguru before he does, but Sensei shuts that idea down immediately. You’re then held up by being given a quick yet scathing lecture about needing to let Suguru face the consequences of his own actions and to stop coddling him. You bow profusely in apology as he’s leaving the room.

Ieiri is away on a research trip of sorts. Being taught the human body and putting her technique into use. Thankfully, she said she’ll be back today, but not until later tonight. Gojo is stuck with your shabby patchwork until then. So, you grab a first-aid kit, fill up an ice pack, and meet him in the classroom that Sensei told you he’d be waiting in.

Gojo has an arm against his face, likely trying to stop the bleeding since it’s stained. You wordlessly get to work. Unfortunately, you have experience with nosebleeds and broken nose. Noses? Can a nose be broken twice? Suguru’s nose still sits crooked from his father’s rage.

“Pinch,” you order softly after you take Gojo’s hand and move his fingers to the bridge of his nose. You reach for his face, pausing as he flinches when you get close. You give him a moment to prepare before you guide him to tilt his head back with gentle hands along his jawline. Blood is smeared all across his lower face and still dripping down from his nostrils. You cringe at the sight. Suguru got him good. “This might hurt,” you warn before you pack his nose with gauze.

“No lecture?” Gojo’s voice is high and nasally.

“You don’t think you’ll be getting one from Sensei?” You grab a damp, warm cloth and start wiping away the blood. “Besides, whatever you did, you got a broken nose for it. What else do I need to say?”

“Might prefer the broken nose over your disappointment,” he says with a pout.

“I’m not disappointed.” You pause. “I don’t think I am, anyway.”

Gojo leans his head back even further, sighing dramatically. “Your BFF is scary when he’s angry.”

“Suguru does this thing where he’ll hold all his emotions close. They sit there, building up pressure, and then one day, he’ll just explode. So, yeah, that’s a little scary. Not so much for me, though. I only worry.” He pouts more. “What’s that face for?”

“No worry for me?”

Your hands hesitate. “Maybe kind of?” Should you say what you want to? Eh. Gojo rarely cares. Why should you? “I’d love it if you two could get along, so I worry that this might keep that from happening forever, but…you probably pushed him. I could be wrong, but you probably deserved this.”

Gojo throws his clean arm over his eyes. “Yeah…I did…” Oh? That’s certainly a change of heart. “No one has ever touched me like that before…” There’s a redness on his cheeks now that doesn’t come from the blood stains. Is he embarrassed that he lost or something? “Why aren’t you and Suguru scared of me?” He tries to lean his head back down, but you keep him in place with a hand gripping his chin. “See? See! Not even my family touches me so casually!”

“What? Is your family actually scared of you?”

“Yeah. Always have been, even if they pretend not to be. They treat me like a god to hide it, but I learned. Everyone is scared of me. Maids apologized for touching me by accident when I was a kid and needed help getting dressed.” Your incredulousness must make him self-conscious because he shrugs. “C’mon, you’ve been around long enough now to pick up on this, Sketch. I’m the jujutsu world’s weapon.”

Normally, you’re immune to being shocked by Gojo’s directness. Not this time. “It’s stupid if you believe that.” Ugh. You’re so pissed off right now. You want to punch someone. That was his mother on the first day that he came to campus, right? Can she come back? Does she have Infinity? “You’re bleeding and breathing right now, aren’t you? Weapons don’t do that. Gods don’t get migraines because of their special eyes. You’re a human. You’re Gojo Satoru.”

“But who is Gojo Satoru if he’s not those things?”

“A sugar-addicted brat who pushes when he shouldn’t,” you intone. He giggles, taking it as the joke it’s supposed to be. “Aren’t you too young to be having an identity crisis? I can’t tell you who you are. I’m not even sure I know who I am. Don’t they say you’re supposed to figure that out in high school or something?”

“Dunno,” he mumbles.

The blood is cleaned from his face. You reach for the icepack but falter. You don’t feel like you’ve said anything helpful. If anything, you feel like you’ve put him in a bad spot. So, you try to reassure him. “It’s okay to take time to figure out who you are, Gojo—”

“Satoru.”

“Huh?”

“Call me Satoru…please…”

“Ah.” You can understand why he wants to be so informal. If he wants to distance himself from his stupid family, you’re more than happy to oblige. “Okay.” He yelps when you press the icepack against his nose. “Let’s all try to get along from now on, okay…Satoru.”

Later, you have Suguru’s big hand in yours while you carefully dab antiseptic on the cuts all over them. You know that this isn’t solely from punching Satoru in the nose, but you don’t press Suguru about it. He hasn’t spoken since you knocked on the door to his dorm room and you’re okay with that. You’ve been through this routine before. It’s what you two do. You patch each other up, being a silent and steady presence until whoever is upset wants to talk.

When you’ve cleaned all his cuts, you try to clean up all the pieces of paper from the band-aids, but Suguru stops you. He slips his fingers through yours and your entwined hands hover in the air between you two. You watch as he intensely studies your hands, so you do the same. When did his hands get so much bigger than yours? How do your hands feel to him, you wonder, because his are so rough. You like the difference, though.

“I’m sorry,” Suguru finally apologizes. “I broke the sunglasses you gave him.”

You huff in amusement. That’s what he’s worried about? “It’s okay.”

“They were your first purchase in Tokyo.”

Ah, you sometimes kind of hate how well he knows you. You do tend to assign some importance to seemingly unimportant trinkets. “I think I’m more attached to the piercings that we got together. I’ll probably keep this somewhere when I finally have to get a new barbell.” You stick out your tongue, as if he’s forgotten the piercing.

“I would’ve given you that first set of earrings if that was the case,” Suguru grumbles. Shoko had used you and Suguru as guinea pigs for her technique and healed your piercings, so Suguru quickly started the process of stretching his ears. As he said, he’d thrown away that first set of earrings.

“I know it’s weird to ask that sort of thing.”

“It’s you, Squid. Nothing is weird anymore.”

“Hmm, sounds like a challenge. I need to find something to disturb you.”

“Please don’t.”

“I’ll be nice for now because you had a bad day.”

“Bad day doesn’t even begin to cover it.” There’s a tired slump in his shoulders now. “He was playing around too much. Instead of exorcising the curse or letting me absorb it, he kept taunting it. The spirit threw me out a window trying to get to him, so I got pissed. I absorbed it and punched him in the face.” He pauses before lowly confessing, “I punched him a second time when I saw the sunglasses broke because I thought they were special to you. I was upset at myself for losing my temper and mad at him for not being careful with them even though it was my fault.”

You hum. “Is that guilt, Suguru?”

“Guilt for the sunglasses.”

“Right.” Again, you’re not pushing, but you doubt he doesn’t feel bad in some way. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be as melancholic as he is right now. “I’m going to let you sit on this, but…I think Satoru actually feels bad, so he might apologize. I didn’t tell him to, by the way. Just like I’m not telling you to forgive him. But I thought you should know.”

Suguru’s brow twitches. “You’re on first name basis with him now?”

“Yeah.”

“Ugh. He’s just doing it to piss me off.”

You’re the one to feel a flash of irritation now. “Doing what exactly? Being my friend? Are you saying that he can’t actually want to be my friend without some ulterior motive?”

Then, he rolls his eyes. Rolls his eyes! “Squid, you’re just reaching now. You know that’s not what I’m saying—”

“What are you saying, then? Has he said something bad that I don’t know about?”

The corners of his eyes are tight. Through gritted teeth, he answers, “No.”

“Okay. So, what’s the problem?”

“I just don’t trust him around you, okay?”

“You just said that he hasn’t done anything shady other than wanting to be my friend.” You yank your hands away from his, baring your teeth. “Am I not allowed to have those? Are you going to say that you don’t trust Shoko around me either?”

Then, he has the audacity to look hurt. “No! That’s not what I’m saying at all! You’re allowed to have friends!”

“Okay! Satoru and Shoko are my friends, too!” Are you overreacting? Tears prick at the corners of your eyes which makes you feel even more stupid. Why are you about to cry? Stupid, stupid, stupid brain. “I’m going back to my room. I’ve got blood under my nails and I fucking hate it.”

“Squid, I’m sorry—”

“Save it, Suguru.”

When you’re woken up by tapping against your window at one in the morning, you seriously debate shoving a pillow over your head and ignoring him. There’s a part of you that wants to let him stew in his guilt. You can’t keep forgiving him as soon as he comes running.

This seems like an insignificant thing to stay mad over, though…

After you take a deep breath, you roll out of bed, walk over to your window, and open it up for him to climb through.

Suguru genuinely does look miserable. More than punching Satoru or breaking your sunglasses made him. When he apologizes, you accept it. And when he shyly asks if he can sleepover, you let him. It’s been years since you guys have shared a bed, but your parents aren’t around to send him home.

Suguru said your hugs are the best hugs, but you have to disagree. You know you’ll wake up in the morning, skin slick with sweat, because he’s a furnace, but you’ve missed this. It’s always been so easy to let Suguru touch you. It got to the point where even the touch of your parents would make you wince, but not his. He asks, but you always say yes. You’re never overwhelmed by the way his big body curls around yours.

“I’m sorry,” Suguru apologizes one last time before you both fall asleep. “I’m scared to lose you,” he slurs sleepily.

“Never,” you mumble right back. “You’ll never lose me.”

***

Five months into the term, it’s time for the annual Goodwill Event.

This year wasn’t the best for Tokyo recruitment, so it’s only your class in the entire school. It’s not the same for Kyoto. They only have one person in their third year, Iori Utahime, but the rest of the years have more students. Normally, first years aren’t allowed to compete, and Tokyo would simply forfeit this year, but because of Suguru and Satoru’s strength, an exception is made.

Kyoto brings a total of eight students—three girls, five boys. Two judges come with them, too—their principal, Gakuganji, and a Grade 1 sorcerer, Mei-Mei.

It’s been about two months after the big Suguru-Satoru Blowout. As you predicted, they apologized to each other not long after the incident. Dare you say, they might be more than simple acquaintances now. Dare you say, they might actually be sort of friends. They’ve really bonded over being assholes, actually. They’re still stupidly competitive and bicker, but it’s no longer malicious. They can exist in the same space as you and there’s no more awkwardness. You spend time with them together and it’s so much fun.

The Goodwill Event reminds you of that deep-rooted fear of Suguru’s, though. A fear that you had before you left the village, you remember suddenly. It finally happens. Suguru is adored. Fawned over. Truly seen for the first time in your lives. The same is done to Satoru, too, but you banked on that happening. And, technically, it makes sense. Guys want their power and girls just want them period.

It was stupid to pretend that your school exists in a bubble. In the back of your mind, you’ve known that you’d eventually have to meet other sorcerers and that not everyone will like you. You’ve prepared yourself for that, haven’t you? It shouldn’t bother you that the Kyoto students barely even acknowledge your existence when you’re in the same space as Suguru and Satoru. You get it, right? They’re admirable. Shoko is awed at for her technique, too, and that’s great! It’s wonderful!

Just four days, you remind yourself as you’re sitting under a tree by yourself and shoving food in your mouth. Four days, and then the Kyoto students will be gone. It’s okay, you chant to yourself. No one noticed you leave, but you wanted some air, anyway. And, hey, you even made a friend! Sure, Shoko had to introduce you to her and break the ice between you two, but Iori has a sharp tongue and awesome sense of humor. A senpai to truly look up to. If you can get along with one new person then you can get along with the rest.

“Yo! Sketch!”

You pause right before you take a bite of your tamagoyaki. “Satoru?” Fruit sando and melon soda in hand, he easily flops down next to you at the base of the tree. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s exhausting dealing with all those brown nosers.” He takes an aggressive chunk out of his sandwich. “Ugh. I can’t believe we’re gonna have to share a dorm with these assholes for four days. I don’t need a bunch of strangers in my business.” His lip curls in disgust. “Suguru lecture you about playing nice?”

“Yes.” You take a grumpy bite out of your tamagoyaki. “I’m trying not to stress about it, but they were already talking about breakfast, and I can’t imagine the mess they’ll make.” It’s a struggle not to snap your chopsticks from the death grip that you’ve got on them. “Suguru says that I need to learn how to handle my routine being interrupted better.”

Satoru huffs. “Easy for him to say.”

Well, it makes you feel a lot better to know that someone else understands your pain. “All we can do is our best.”

“Or we can make their lives hell.”

You duck your head, trying to hide your smile. “It wouldn’t kill you to play nice with others, Satoru.”

“Naw, I think it actually would.”

“You’re nice to me.”

“Sketch is different.” Heat explodes in your cheeks. You outright turn your head away, not giving him the satisfaction of seeing how much he flustered you with that. Since he doesn’t tease you, he didn’t see. “We should stay in a hotel. We could do one of those capsule hotels, y’know?”

“And have my knees and elbows bumping against the sides? No way.” You stick your tongue out in disgust. After the third bump of a limb, you know it would drive you insane. Besides, “Would you even fit in one of those?” Ah. Wait. Were you supposed to take that seriously? “Were you joking?”

You look back over at him and he’s scratching the bridge of his nose. “Not really.”

“Ha. Okay, so, a couple of things—I think we’re too young to book a room, and a girl and boy in the same room? Scandalous.”

He gives an exaggerated sigh. “Fine.”

Sympathetic to his plight, you reach over to pat his knee. “Hang in there.”

These days, it’s a little easier for you to pick up on the kind of mood Satoru is in. It’s the second day now, early in the morning, and you’re dragged by Shoko to the designated gathering spot of Tokyo and Kyoto students. Just by the way that Satoru lashes out at people, purposely baiting them with taunts and cruel bluntness, you can tell that he’s in as bad a mood as you are. And you can’t blame him.

The other two girls on the Kyoto side are Ota Juri and Takata Tenka. They cleaned up after themselves, but they moved everything around in the kitchen and didn’t put it back in the original spot, so you got pissed off trying to find where something went. You could live with that, but they’re also…invasive. After they went looking for Suguru and Satoru yesterday and found the boys with you, their attitude toward you quickly changed. They think they’re slick, subtly probing about your friendship with Suguru and Satoru. They try to act familiar now, getting touchy, thinking that’ll warm you up to them faster.

To say that you’re on a wire’s edge today would be an understatement. You don’t know which one suggested it, but you want to deck whichever one of these girls suggested shopping as a way to build comradery between the sister schools and the people you may be working with in the future. They just want to experience the Tokyo scene like they probably couldn’t get permission to ride a train here on any other day.

At the mall, Ota and Takata take the lead. They have very domineering personalities, so their classmates allow the girls to drag them along. You try to sneak away, sometimes with Shoko and Iori behind you, but Ota and Takata hunt you down—probably trying to show off how caring they are to Suguru and Satoru or something. Eventually, you stop trying. You shut up and linger at the back of the group.

You try to do that, anyway.

Shoko, as equally over this trip, drags you into the beauty store because if she’s going down, you’re going with her.

“Aren’t you going to get anything?” Ota questions as you’re just passively glancing over products. You almost miss the question because you’re teetering on the edge of overstimulation. Why do beauty stores have to use so much fluorescent lighting? You forgot your fucking sunglasses.

“I’m not big into makeup. I don’t like how it feels on my face.”

Ota laughs obnoxiously. “You’re just using the wrong product, silly.”

You force a smile. “My mom already tested a bunch out with me. I just really don’t like any of it.”

Takata has been eavesdropping. She takes up Ota’s side, smiling as predatory as Ota is now. “Was it the foundation? I know the liquid can be heavy. Have you tried powder?” You lose control of your temper a little and roll your eyes. Don’t these girls know how to take no for an answer? “Don’t be like that,” Takata scolds. “Look, you could stand to use some makeup. We’re trying to help you.”

“Help how?”

If Satoru hadn’t spoken up ahead of time, you’d probably tip over when he practically drapes himself on your shoulder.

Ota and Takata perk up at his presence. You can almost see the hearts in their eyes. “Satoru!” Takata chirps.

“Oi, oi, oi, you’re getting awfully familiar there. Who gave you first name privilege, huh?”

Her syrupy sweet smiles falter. “Oh, I’m sorry. I thought—”

“Don’t hurt yourself. Steam might start spewing from your ears. It’s obvious you don’t have a lot going on up there.”

Takata deflates at the insult. “Sa—Gojo—” her gaze flickers to you. Pleading for you to intervene. When she gets nothing from you, she scrambles. “I’m sorry if we offended you somehow—”

“Not me you should be apologizing to.” Your eyes widen. Is he doing this for you? “Y’know, Sketch, it’s good that someone has some sense around here. Make sure you don’t get attached to these idiots, okay? They’ll be so busy thinking about makeup that they’ll up as bloody smears on the wall pretty soon.”

You frown as you look up at him. “What if I do want makeup?”

He brightens. “Can I buy you something?”

Try to make the favoritism less obvious, you think with a twitch of the brow. “Find an art store and we’ll talk.”

“Eh? I already did,” he says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world that he would go scouting for art supply stores. “Can we leave now? I��m bored,” he whines. You hope you’re not gawking when you nod. “Awesome! Let’s go! I found a shop that sells sweets, too!”

Suguru is hovering at the entrance of the store, brows furrowed in concern, but he steps out of the way for you and Satoru, who is practically dragging you out with a grip on your wrist. Suguru isn’t allowed confusion or shock because Satoru is snatching his hand on the way out.

“Satoru, you’re going to rip my arm off,” Suguru complains when the other students are out of sight.

Satoru stops dead in his tracks, so sudden that you and Suguru almost crash into him. He looks over his shoulder at you both. The angle you’re in allows you to see the wideness of his eyes. He still hasn’t let go of your wrist. Actually, his grip tightens, which makes Suguru get huffier.  

“Satoru,” he calls out exasperatedly.

Oh.

You’re not sure if Suguru has realized it himself, but he’s using Satoru’s given name now. No wonder Satoru is stunned. It’s so odd. What changed between this morning and now? Because Suguru was definitely referring to him as his surname earlier. You won’t ask because Suguru might clam up and this peace may shatter.

“Oh. Uh. Sorry,” Satoru mutters as he finally releases his hold on you and Suguru.

On the fourth and final day of the Goodwill Event, something…weird happens during your individual match.

Tokyo easily won the team battle. The individual battles are where Kyoto can even the odds. The thing is that Satoru and Suguru are going to win their individual match. As much as you adore her, you expected that Shoko would lose hers, and she did. You couldn’t hear what was happening, but you think that she flirted with Iori more than fight, but Iori didn’t allow herself to get too flustered, and took the win.

You think that Kyoto expects you to lose your match because plans were already made about the tiebreaker. There would be a random draw for one last individual match to decide which school wins the day. There was no word on what would be done to break the tie if each school has their own point.

So, your win is an upset.

If you’re honest with yourself, you didn’t think that you’d win, either. It didn’t look good. It was your luck that you were pitted against the biggest guy on Kyoto’s side. Not as tall as Suguru and Satoru, sure, but the guy is built like a literal tank. During the team battle, if Suguru hadn’t summoned a cursed spirit in time to cushion the blow, this guy would’ve knocked him out with a single punch.

You didn’t stand a chance at winning, you’d told yourself as you were running through the forest, but after the whole mall fiasco, you wanted to try to last long enough to not be the laughingstock of this year.

As soon as the siren sounded, you went running. Your opponent supplemented his lack of technique with shikigami use, so you had time while he channeled energy into an intermediary to summon his shikigami. You’re trying to think of a plan on the fly, not sure what to do since your technique is useless against people.

This would be easier if there weren’t still so many fucking cursed spirits left in the forest. You’re pacifying them, obviously, but you still have to duck around them. Ugh, why can’t you control them like Suguru can? No, at this point…

I wish you would just die, please. Bloody and painfully would be preferred.

And, as soon as you have that thought, the big curse that you were dashing past moves. Your body freezes on instinct. The spirit shouldn’t be moving around you. Your technique is still active. At the most, this curse is Grade 3. It raises a clawed hand, and you throw your arms up, ready to protect yourself from a whole new problem.

There’s a sickening crunch and the curse screeches in pain. Purple blood splatters across the front of you. When you drop your arms, confused as to what attacked the spirit and saved you, you watch the gruesome scene of the curse slowly ripping limbs away from its body. It still has that dead-eyed look that spirits get when you’ve pacified them, but it moves with an urgency to tear itself apart.

Once the curse has only one arm left, it proceeds to push its arm through its own chest, grabbing its heart. That heart is thrown at your feet. Then, as its final act, it slowly twists its head around until it’s the opposite way, pulls its head off, and the curse finally crumbles to pieces.

What the fuck happened?

From your left, there’s more of those crunches and high-pitched screeching. A curse in the shape of a centipede is trying to crawl toward you between picking legs off with its pincers. At your feet, the curse keeps gnawing at itself, screeching in pain every now and then, until it, too, finally dies and crumbles.

If you didn’t hear the loud roar of your opponent’s shikigami, you’d still be standing there in shock. Your mind runs faster than your legs. That’s not normal behavior. Self-preservation is ingrained into a curse…unless it’s forced like with Suguru. You asked them to die. Moreso, you wanted it to be bloody and painful. The curses listened.

You purposely seek out another spirit now. Die, you mentally scream at the first spirit you see. Unlike with the others, this one doesn’t take time to mutilate itself. It tears its head clean off and that’s it. Blood splatters across your shoes briefly before it fades away with the cursed spirit.

A plan slowly takes shape.

Didn’t you and Shoko stumble across a pack of fly heads yesterday? You’d split up because you knew Kyoto would try to follow Satoru’s presence and get to the winning Grade 2 before you. The fly heads weren’t a bother and the bell had rung sounding your win, anyway.

Where were those? By the river, right? Yes!

You’re getting tired from running and burning cursed energy. You’re pretty sure that you only have one shot at this because you’ll either pass out from exhaustion or get your ass beat by a shikigami. So, yeah, you need to make this count.

The fly heads haven’t moved far.

Kyoto Guy and his shikigami aren’t far behind you.

Just as they’re running out of the tree line, you look at the pacified fly heads. Protect me, you plead them, but that’s too much to ask. It was a test. The fly heads don’t move, but you’re forced to when the shikigami lunges. That thing is sporting some nasty fangs that catch on your arm as you narrowly dodge it.

You play this game of cat and mouse, luring the shikigami away from the sorcerer. All you need is for Kyoto Guy to get close enough to the fly heads. He’s an asshole, laughing cruelly as he watches you scramble away from his shikigami, getting bloodier as you get sloppier from fatigue. Iori was gossiping with you and Shoko, and this guy has a crush on Takata. You figure he’s not happy about Satoru’s cruelty which was a result of him defending you.

Explode! You plead the fly heads when Kyoto Guy steps in their range. Explode, explode, explode!

They do.

The shikigami immediately drops the fight with you, thinking the fly heads are the more immediate threat. Like little paint bombs, the fly heads splatter their blood across Kyoto Guy when they force themselves to combust. There are so many of them that he’s continually being splattered.

While he’s blinded by the blood of cursed spirits, you pour cursed energy into your fist. Sprinting past the shikigami that’s snapping at fly heads, you give this asshole a ferocious kick to the balls to get him to hunch over.

You slam your fist square in the center of his face. There’s so much force in the punch that he goes flying back, landing in the shallow river with such a painful sounding thud, and he doesn’t get up. You’d think you killed him if it wasn’t for the subtle rise and fall of his chest.

The alarm sounds.

Tokyo wins.

Later, you’re walking out of the infirmary behind Shoko who proudly announces, “She gave him a concussion!”

Sensei gives you all a lecture on good sportsmanship after Satoru, Suguru, and Shoko break out into applause and cheers.

[p0ssywhippedcream]

I'm back again! So for me, all the one-shots where Percy is being a shit to y/n are like a series of  a toxic relationship, and I WANT HIM TO SUFFER SO BAD. It could be because I despise assholes or because he reminds me too much of my shitty ex (Percy, I adore you, but this is personal now).

Yes, my ex wasn't over his ex while being with me and told me that he preferred to still have the 140 pictures (yes, I remember this detail) of her than be with me.

Like I said before, I would love fluff, but I need vengeance! I NEED IT!

So please, I beg you! Write something that will fulfill my soul; I know you can. I only want him to pay, nothing else.

Love, THE Anon 🧚

I've tried to figure out how to say "fuck your ex" in a creative way but low-key im too tired he's just a douche n im so happy you know you deserve better n you're not with him!!! Also I wrote this sleep deprived on a 8 hour flight n actually kinda hate it but I promised so I deliver.

48 times. 48 times Percy’s called you and 48 times you haven’t picked up. It’s been about two weeks since you left and he hasn’t heard a lick of you, complete silence on your end.

For a while he respected the wall you’d put up, only because he didn’t miss what was behind it. He had Annabeth, his best friend and he didn’t need you.

Then earlier, he was doing the dishes with his mom. She was drying and he was washing and maybe he would’ve noticed her silence sooner if he wasn’t zeroed in on scrubbing off a chunk of fried egg.

When he finally looked up, Percy noticed her staring out the window with the look she only got when she was thinking of his dad and nudged her gently.

“Mom?”

Sally turned and met his questioning gaze. Her eyes were less sad, more reminiscent.

“Sometimes I just wonder, what it would have been like if he stayed.”

Percy nods, thinking of the man in the next room who stepped in the empty role his father left behind.

“I love Paul, my life now, but I just know that... maybe if he tried a little harder, you could have had it a little easier… I won’t ever forget the love I had for him because it gave me you, but I don’t think I’ll ever forgive it either.”

And now he’s sitting on his bed, slumped over his phone with so many wonders. Could you ever forgive him? Why was it so easy to let you go if it hurts so bad now? 

He calls you again, gets your up-beat ringtone and can’t help the surge of anger. It’s misdirected, you don’t deserve it and it immediately returns full force his way with a guilt tenfold.

So he calls you again and you tell him to leave a message at the beep. He hangs up before he can hear it.

His thumb hovers over the little phone on his screen, 50 times is pushing it.

He gives you a break, and waits, and waits, and waits.

And an hour later, his phone rings and he practically pounces on the device. It’s your smiling face shining up at him and your concerned voice echoing when he picks up.

“Percy? You okay? What’s going on?”

“I-I’m okay, I just wanted to talk to you.”

“Percy,” You sigh, “I was seriously freaked out, I thought you might be dying or something.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Okay.”

He heard you take a breath, holding one of his own.

“What did you want to talk about?”

“I’m- I’m sorry. I’m really sorry and really stupid and I should’ve apologized so much sooner.”

“Yeah, I know.” He winces, “Anything else?” 

“Annabeth doesn’t mean anything to me that way, it’s you. It’s always been you and I’ve been too blind to see the obvious. I thought I needed her still because I knew I could never ask you to be what she was.”

You don’t say anything, he’s compelled to go on but a little scared he’s already messed up.

“Percy, there’s so much wrong with everything you just said but I don’t have the energy to correct you. I’m tired, it’s been a long day and I really just can’t do this, okay?”

“Wait, p-please,” His voice cracks and he makes no attempt to cover it. “Can you just listen to me?”

“No, I can’t. When I said I was done, I meant it. Don’t call me again.”

And with that, the phone call is over. The dial tone is a harsh contrast to your soft voice, it breaks his heart a little more. He misses you a little more when he pulls the phone away from his ear and sees what he could have had in your profile picture. He hates himself a little more when the next number he’s calling is Annabeth’s and she’s picking up with a care in her tone he only wants to hear from you.

[f64l]

I‘m a good girl officer Swan

‚You have been living in Forks for your entire life with boring parents and boring friends. But when Isabella Swan moves to Forks to live with her father, Charlie Swan, your life seems to get a bit more interesting. With you and Bella spending so much time together you also can no longer deny your feelings for your friends father. Sad and disappointed that Bella and your mutual friend, Jessica didn’t wait for you to go and watch a movie together, the moment gets heated and Charlie and you release some pent up frustration. And what could blossom out of that one fateful night?‘

NSFW: Charlie Swan x fem reader, smut ahead. Age gap (reader is 18+), p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it my friends).

This story is meant for 18+ readers only! If you are younger than that please look at something else. A unicorn for example. No jokes aside, I‘m serious about that. The reader in this story is y/n so you but has a vagina. I‘m sorry if that doesn’t match for some of you. Let me know if you liked it or didn’t. Enjoy!

Last chance under 18 year olds!

Bella has been kinda depressed lately and you’ve tried everything to help her and her father. You cooked for them and even slept over sometimes so that Chief Swan could have a quite night. You are certain that if it weren’t for you helping, that Mr. Swan would have send Bella away to live with her mom again much sooner. You even went with Bella on her murderous adventures and covered for her when she needed it. Throughout that time, you discovered your feelings for Bella’s father. You admired him because he was trying to help his daughter so much. But you also had to admit that his uniform looked rather good on him and that you are thinking about him when you lay in bed at night trying to pleasure yourself. Lately he has been even more concerned for his daughter and so she invited you and Jessica to go and watch a movie with her in the city. 

You walked all the way to Bellas house and even had to run the last few minutes because it had started to rain. Freezing and wet from your sprint you were now standing in front of Charlie Swan that looked at you confused. 

“Aren’t you already with Bella and her friend in the city to watch a movie?”

“What? No, we said to meet here at five thirty. Has she already left?”

“Yea, they left like nearly half an hour ago. I thought you were already in the car even tough I couldn’t see you when I tried to spot you.” 

‘He tried to spot me’, you thought as you felt a blush creeping onto your cheeks.

“But why would they leave without me?”

“I’m sorry, y/n. I don’t know. Maybe they thought that you’d meet them there.”

You cringed at his innocent view on his daughter. Has he not witnessed her in the last few months? She’s been nothing but unresponsive and demanding of both of you. Sometimes calling you in the middle of the night when she’s had another of her nightmares or asking you to cook or bake something extremely complicated and then not touching it. And all that without muttering one small ‘thank you’ to either of you.

“Umm, do you maybe want to come inside? You look a bit cold and I don’t want you to get sick. You can pat yourself dry and change into something else.”

“Could you take me home then, Charlie? I don’t want to get wet again.”

“Sure. Shout for me if you need anything.”

You nod as you make your way upstairs. You enter Bellas room and look for your bag that you forgot when you slept over on the weekend. You spot it right next to the door but your shirt is missing. Shoot, has Bella taken your stuff again? You grab one of hers and some of your own leggings. 

“Hey Charlie?”

“Yes?”

“Do you mind if I take a quick shower.”

“No, of course not. Take your time.”

You remove your wet clothes that cling to your body like a second skin and hop under the shower.  You shudder as the hot water runs down your cold skin and you warm up rapidly. When you get out of the shower you notice that you didn’t get yourself a towel. ‘Fuck’!

“Ummm Charlie?”, you yell out of the bathroom.

“Is something wrong, y/n?”, you notice the concern in his voice. 

“No, well kind of. I forgot to get myself a towel.”

“Oh, I will get you one.”

“Thank you.”

You patiently wait as you listen to his movements downstairs until he finally stands in front of the closed bathroom door. 

“Can I open the door a bit, y/n?”, he asks uncertain.

“Um, yes.”

The door opens just a crack. You take the towel as fast as you can but still notice Charlies eyes lingering on the curve of your hips before you close the door rapidly. You pat yourself dry and put on your underwear, the shirt and the leggings. 

Cautiously you move down the stairs and into the living room where Charlie is sitting looking at the black screen of his television. 

“Thank you for the towel. That was very nice.”

He looks at you and smiles lightly.

“No problem. I like to help you, y/n. And you’ve been helping us so much lately. That’s the least I should do for you.”, he motions for you to take a seat beside him. You follow his invitation and sit as close as socially acceptable. 

“Oh no, don’t thank me for that. I like to help you too, Charlie. Very much.”

You notice the light blush on his cheek as you say that. You look at each other for a few seconds until you break the silence again.

“Are you feeling alright, Charlie? These past few months must’ve been so hard for you.”

His eyes soften at your words.

“Ah, y/n. You’re always so nice. I appreciate you looking out for me. It’s been hard on both of us. But there is nothing you should worry your pretty head about!”, he caresses your hand.

“But what if I want to be there for you. And worry with you and help you with that immense stress.”, somehow you guys kept getting closer and closer.

“Mhhh, I don’t know, is there anything you can do for me to destress?”

And with that you did your boldest move so far in your entire life and connect your lips. Quite surprised you feel his breath catch in his throat but then he moves you to straddle his waist and deepens the kiss. You can’t help but whimper into his mouth. This has been something that you dreamed about for months and now it was reality. You then start moving your hips against his hardening member and he moans into your mouth. Suddenly he breaks the kiss and holds you back from rocking back and forth, an unsatisfied sound leaving your lips at the lack of friction. 

“We can’t do this, y/n. I’m too old for you and I don’t know. I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”

“You’re so sweet, Charlie. But I’ve wanted this for months! I want this. I want you!”

“God, y/n. I can’t resist you when you say those things.”

He attacks your lips again and pushes you onto your back while fiddling with the waistband of your leggings. You help him push them down and grab for his belt and then his zipper. He pushes the waistband of his pants and his underwear down and steps out of them. Your eyes widen at the size of him and you carefully wrap your hands around the base of his girth. He breathes heavily while you pump his cock and sweep your thumb over his tip. You yelp surprised when he starts fucking into your fist and screech loudly when he tears your underwear of your body. He spreads your legs and presses his thumb against your clit. For a few minutes you can only hear his and your moans combined and the sound of slick movements while you pleasure each other. He enters two of his fingers and moves them rapidly in and out, moaning when his fingers get covered in your wetness. With those two fingers moving in and out and his thumb still circling your clit you reach your orgasm rather quickly. Your pussy gushes around his fingers and sucks them deeper as your legs twitch uncontrollably around his hips. 

“Please Charlie! Fuck me! Please!”, you yell out.

“Ah y/n, are you sure?”

“Yes please!”

You remove your hand hastily and he aligns himself with your opening. You tense when he begins to enter you. He shudders when he’s buried to the hilt inside of you.

“Oh god, y/n. You are tighter than I imagined!”

“You thought about me that way?”, your cunt clenches around him.

“Yea, of course I did. Every time I had to wrap my hand around my cock because of your short skirts and tight shorts. Fuck, clench me like that again!”, you do as he says and moan out when you feel the thick girth hit the back of your pussy again. He begins to speed up his thrusts. His movements fast but steady. But the pleasure is suddenly too much for you again and you can’t help yourself when you grip the back of his thighs and come undone. You scream out his name and he fucks you trough your orgasm. He pulls out of you.

On trembling legs he moves you to straddle him again. This time thrusting up into you. You grasp one of his shoulders and the top of the backrest of his couch to stabilise yourself from his fast movements. He moans loudly when you begin to meet his thrusts and kiss him hungrily.

“I think I’m coming again Charlie.”, he fucks you harder.

“Scream my name, y/n!”, and oh you do. You roll your hips and chant his name when you feel the tightening feeling in your abdomen snap and you clench around him again. This time he halts his movements and buries himself inside of you as he himself moans your name again and again. He twitches when you feel him emptying his load of hot cum deep inside of you. Worn out you burry your face in the crook of his neck and he kisses the side of your head. 

“Fuck that was amazing, y/n. I’ve never come so hard.”

“Me neither, Charlie.”, you say and peck him on the lips.

Pt. 2 guys?

[lume-nosity]

celestial callings

[when celestia has managed to reconnect with you once more after all of these years, you have no other choice but to concede and return from whence you came. even if it means leaving the one you love behind and for them to grovel in despair.]

style: angst

inspo: @scarafrisbee for lending me this prompt of theirs to write out <3

ft: scaramouche, albedo

notes: not proofread, kinda half-assed and weird because i’m lazy and suffering from writer’s block, gn!reader, sucrose mention, albedo’s part is a little long

reblogs are appreciated!

scaramouche

for the first time in a long while, he thought he had something. something that can help him feel warm, at home, and most of all.. loved.

he trusted that concept to a great extent; you were someone who he holds dear and knew that you would never leave him.

but he was wrong, again. you were no different than the rest of them.

this was all because of your background in regards to your past. “i’m not surprised.” is the only thing that slips out of his mouth. he should’ve expected this sooner.

how many abandonments must he go through to understand that nobody is truly there for him?

after you’ve left and said your final goodbyes to him, all he did was stand there. devoid of all emotion as if he had any in the first place. he’s a puppet, puppets don’t have feelings right?

well, this one has feelings. and they’re genuine.

but all he could do was hang his head low with a deadpan expression, before scoffing to himself and turned to walk the opposite direction.

although it looked as if he didn’t care on the outside, deep down, there was a tinge of sadness deep within his chest that’s eating at him with every step he takes.

albedo

he received word of your departure from sucrose and at first he told her: ‘it’s not good to joke about something as important as that’ but sucrose went into more detail to further deepen his denial.

it appears he was incorrect about you.

in his head, your presence held something much more stronger that he wasn’t able to pinpoint what it was. he knew something was off about you, but he didn’t push further on the matter and thought he was over analyzing it.

which was his first and last mistake.

it led him down into a deeper rabbit hole of more questions: ‘why would this happen?’ ‘why them?’ ‘why now?’ ‘what should i do?’

more questions would grow as more answers would wilt.

he knew relationships were troublesome and they take a lot of time and energy out of him to even make one, but this one in particular he had with you was much different.

and special.

so for you to just leave him to go back to celestia completely shuts him down.

he doesn’t know how to feel about the news his assistant has told him judging from how he was standing there like a stone, cold statue. but the only hint of emotion you’re able to see from him is his eyes.

his eyes speak more than words ever could.

they may be cold on the outside, but they speak of anguish, disbelief, denial, sadness, the list could go on. and yet this is the first time he felt such emotions rush inside him all at once.

it truly hurted him.

hurted him to the point he had to excuse himself from sucrose to give him time to think about what happened.

it will take way too long for him to get over such a revelation, as it will most likely stick into the back of his mind for as long as he exists.

and he didn’t even get the chance to meet you one last time before you left.

an: hi everyone i’m kinda back with writing??? but the writer’s block is still quite heavy here because i didn’t get to write for all the characters..(sorry riri ☹️) but i wanted to write as much as i can here, so i hope this is acceptable. and i know i said i was going to make a fluff post but it looks like i didn’t, as i came back with yet another angst post. so i might pay back that debt sooner or later once something clicks in my head i promise 🙏

[leejihoonismyhusband]

Seventeen reaction when you are mad at them for being friends with their ex (HYUNG LINE)

Here, take some deleu pills💊💊💊

Seungcheol

Is mad at himself for not telling you sooner

Didn’t think it was a big deal because his ex is in the past

Gives you space if you need it

Does everything he can to make it up to you

“I’m sorry for not telling you sweetheart. I promise nothing is going on.”

Jeonghan

Doesn’t see the big deal

They are just friends, nothing more

He’s with you now and doesn’t want anybody else to

Complaining 24/7 until you forgive him

“We are just friends Y/N! I don’t want them! I have you! Forgive me!”

Joshua (I’m barking at this gif)

Feels absolutely awful for hurting you

That was the last thing he wanted to do

Assures you nothing is going on

Gives you space if you need it like leader coups

“I’m so honey. Please forgive me. I’ll do anything for you.”

Jun

This boi is confused

Why are you mad? He’s with you now

If he wanted his ex back that he would break up with you

Doesn’t understand your anger

“Don’t you trust me? I love you and only you. My ex is my ex for a reason.”

Hoshi

He feels sad for hurting you

He didn’t think it would make you mad

Tiger boi is upset at himself

Pouts when you don’t forgive him

“I’m sorry baby girl/boy! Please forgive me! Nothing is going on! Pinky promise!”

Wonwoo

Thinks that you being mad is ridiculous

He’s with you right?

His ex is his ex for a reason

Is mad because he thinks you don’t trust him

“Do you really think I’m going to cheat on you? I love you and no one else. We are just friends and I don’t want nothing more with them. I ended things with them for a reason. I’m with you now and I’m happy.”

Woozi

Does all the songs he wrote about you mean nothing?

Him getting back with his ex are like him leaving his studio and facing the sun

That ain’t going to happen

Is kinda mad as well

“Are you seriously mad? This is so stupid! I only want you! Stop being mad over this!”

[i4heseung]

if i knew it all then.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

“but when i wake up, i see you with me.”

song playing: everything i wanted by billie eilish.

i’ll protect you forever, love.

∘°∘♡∘°∘ lee heeseung x fem reader

warnings - lowercase intended, pet names (babe, love, angel), angst.

heeseung looked at the picture that was taken back when you were still alive. he couldn’t believe that you died while saving him. he wished that he was behind the wheel when the truck hit you. heeseung’s tears won’t stop from thinking about all of the memories you two did together. before you died, you were in the hospital with heeseung’s child in your hands. the two of you didn’t think of a name because she came sooner than her due date.

your parents blamed heeseung for letting you die than him. which he blamed himself for. he hated that his lover died just to protect him. but heeseung stayed strong, just for you and his child.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

“jiwoo!” heeseung called out for his daughter who was playing with her friends. she turned around and smiled, seeing her dad. she said her goodbyes to her friends and ran towards heeseung to hug him.

“my pretty angel, how are you?” heeseung held her small backpack as he hugged her back before letting her down.

“i’m okay! i made so much friends today!” jiwon says brightly as heeseung thought of you. which made him eyes watery. you were as bright as your daughter. he guessed that she got that from you. heeseung brushed his watery eyes away, but failed to do so. jiwoo catched on, “what’s wrong, pa?”

“oh, it’s nothing love. something went into my eye, that’s all.” heeseung told jiwoo but the sadness in her eyes knew what was going on. good thing the both of you were away and heading towards heeseung’s car.

“is it about ma?” jiwoo’s voice was different here. heeseung kneeled down, now in the same height as jiwoo. “i miss her. it’s just the way you acted brightly over there, made me think of your mother. she was as bright as you so i kinda just-” heeseung was caught off guard when jiwoo hugged him warmly.

“she told me to tell you that everything will be fine and don’t worry about her,” heeseung’s eyes were more teary than before and a tear fall from his eyes and down his cheeks. jiwoo broke the hug, seeing heeseung’s tears falling. she wiped them off gently, “when did she tell you that?”

“in my dreams. she had watery eyes like you did.” heeseung sniffed and wiped the extra tears that she didn’t get. he smiled at her before unlocking the car. before so, heeseung told her something.

“whenever she’s in your dreams, tell her i miss her so, so much,” jiwoo nodded brightly. “wanna get ice cream before going home?”

“yes please!!”

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

after their meal together, heeseung cleaned up jiwoo. before doing so, he heard a knock at the door. “it must be uncle jake and jay!” jiwoo says as she ran towards the door. “jiwoo, hold on.” heeseung stopped jiwoo from getting closer to the door. jay and jake? why are they doing here? he looked through the peep hole before opening.

“uncle jay!” jiwoo ran towards jay as he hugged her before heeseung welcomes them inside.

once heeseung cleaned up the house after the meal, jiwoo was playing with the boys, laughing with them. jake looked up towards heeseung, then got up towards him.

jake broke the silence by saying, “jiwoo looked alot like her, you know? her personality and her gratitude.”

“thanks. she would appreciate you saying that.” both of them laughed as they talked about jiwoo even more.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

“how are you?” jay asked heeseung as he sat down on the sofa next to jake. “it’s been alright. after the incident, i had to take care of my daughter now so,”

“although it was hard letting her go.” the voice in heeseung was hurt and the boys knew that he was still hurt ever since you died. he just didn’t want to show it all in front of them and jiwoo.

“even her own parents hate me.” that’s when heeseung started showing the pain he kept to himself towards the younger boys. not knowing that jiwoo heard everything.

jiwoo was smart, smart as you, bubbly and sometimes stubborn. she was like a mini you. but after hearing that her own grandparents, hated her dad for killing your mom. she walked away with tears in her eyes, trying to fall back asleep. tears still falling down her cheeks. dad really suffered alot after mom died. she thought before her eyes grew heavier.

not knowing that she was named after her mom.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

i’m so sorry that it’s been awhile since i posted :(

i haven’t have any ideas after the last post and everything just went blank so i’m so sorry for that as well! i’m still working on chapter two of that jungwon ff but i’m not sure when i’ll be posting it. i hope everything goes well with this story! also sorry for this short story!

thank you so much!

[amyyythestarry]

TBHK CHAPTER 110 ANALYSIS!

Lots to say about this chapter..

So cool, Tsukasa is always so cool. I like how he threw the piece in the air and disappeared..!

He was beating his a**.

He’s still fine even when getting his a** beat.

Literally whopping him.

That didn’t do sh** 💀.

Welp..

And here Akane was saying supernaturals are heartless, only think for themselves.

This is so incredibly sweet of Mirai.

They actually had some attachments, the Clock Keepers actually cared about each other.

Akane’s traumatized.

I wonder why it’s a key, why is that so important to them, and why is Mirai carrying it?

Here comes both of their ugly a**es.

Wow, look how happy Mitsuba is about seeing Natsuhiko.

Their still brothers y’all.

Their still brothers y’all.

Such a shame.

But I wonder why they say he doesn’t have one. The seal is on top of his boundary isn’t it? Does that not count as a yorishiro?

Bro, Mitsuba stay alive for once, why don’t you?

He does every arc he’s in.

Does a yorishiro have to be something important to the mystery? I’m guessing so. Kinda unfair that that actually counts.

But I guess Mitsuba was too busy thinking about how he was gonna go down that he didn’t really care if he got a yorishiro or not.

“Always asking for the moon.”

I like that phrase. Especially since there is a certain moon he’s always begging to, always wanting to get his wish granted by that certain moon.

Really, this though, this does kind of ruin my theory.

This could give Mitsuba and even more reason to have a well deserved villain arc, but now he’s not in the proximity of Tsukasa to make him his yorishiro, and Tsukasa hasn’t disappeared yet, but if it does happen then Mitsuba definitely won’t be the one to save him.

So sad, it’s possible both of them will die sooner than expected.

I wonder if this is what Tsukasa meant by ‘Mitsuba will be dealt with, some how’?

Maybe he was talking about encouraging Mitsuba to get one, at first? Maybe?

Did he know what Natsuhiko was going to do to Mitsuba if he didn’t get a yorishiro?

It does seem like the Broadcast trio has planned everything ahead..

Though, what was all of the wish granting for then?

All the hard work he’s done, willingly, so Mitsuba could get strong and get what he wants. If he already knew, then wouldn’t that have all been a waste of time and efforts?

They planned all of this from the very start, most of it. From the very start, ever since former Mitsuba died, Tsukasa created him so he could have his wish.

Did Tsukasa really know about this? I don’t think so…

Such a serene face, carefully explaining everything like always, stating that everything will finally be over soon.

He says ‘finally’ like he’s been waiting for this moment, hoping it’s soon, hoping he can finally be destroyed, and disappear.

This would have gone so smoothly too, let’s say, if Nene would have tore off the seals. Only No.1’s and himself. Nene would only have to tear off No.1’s and his seal, or possibly both at the same time too.

Teru has a point, why didn’t the Clock Keepers do something.

They have powers, why didn’t they use them? They could have stopped Tsukasa’s time for a while, they could have send him back in the past, they could have forwarded his time. They could have been fast enough, right?

I’m still so surprised that Hanako actually did something to stop his brother.

Amane did want this. He wanted the yorishiros to disappear so he could get his wish. He knew it was going to come to this, right? He knew he was going have to see his brother disappear in order to get want he wanted.

On Manga Up they said ‘we’, but I’m glad the official translation says otherwise. It would have opened up a lot of questions for us if they said ‘we’ and ‘us’.

I love how the real Amane is coming through now. He’s actually doing something to stop this from going on, because he knows after all of this, he won’t ever see his little brother again. He can’t be saved this time.

I love this panel.

I love how Tsukasa doesn’t grasp Hanako’s emotions, he’s just like “So?” Asking Hanako to clarify what’s he’s trying to say.

Or he’s saying ‘so’ as in he doesn’t give two sh**s.

He won the idgaf challenge. He’s been won it actually.

Hanako’s face reminds me of the same expression he had on the rooftop chapter, when he pinned Nene down, or when he met Tsukasa again in the hallways during the whole Mitsuba scene and he looked down, almost about to cry, trying to cover up his face.

This is the face Tsukasa likes. It holds so much emotions that Amane wouldn’t usually outwardly admit.

I ran out of photo, but I also like and hate how Hanako says “I hate you,” at the end.

That also holds so much emotions, so much meanings.

I imagine the next seen or so, Tsukasa will be smiling. He’ll be smiling cause he knows how much Amane hates him. Even though Amane doesn’t actually, Tsukasa can’t tell when ‘I hate you’ actually translates to ‘I love you’.

For Amane right now, that ‘I hate you’ is his way of saying ‘I need you to stay, I love you’.

I knew Hanako/Amane couldn’t live his afterlife knowing Tsukasa would be gone, not even for the cost of a wish. It’s just so lovely to here it in canon.

I wonder when Tsukasa will finally realize Amane just won’t let him go.

[awkward-tension-art]

Remain By His Side Chp.7 Taxi

Chap.6 (Smut) Chapter.7

Leon's week to spend back home was over, and now you waited for the taxi with him.

Heyo! this one is shorter. my motivation for writing has been shot b/c of my allergies lol

Warnings: More slow burn, leon needs a hug, he and reader are both kinda sad, brief mention of sibling death, Leon ignoring his feelings

“When will you come back?” You asked him, looking into his eyes. Leon was leaving back to military training, and a taxi was already called.

He’s been…quiet towards you. Ever since he told you about Raccoon City in detail. Ever since that night, he hasn’t looked you in the eye. 

“I…don’t know.” He mumbled, “But I’ll come back. Unless you move. Or kick me out.” 

You snorted, “That's not going to happen, I like our apartment.” It was a good location. You were close enough to your medical school you could practically walk there. Once the semester begins in a couple months, you’d be grateful for the short commute, “Besides, even if I got a new place, I’d send you a key.” 

Leon’s grin seemed…empty, hollow, “I haven’t annoyed you yet?” 

“Not at all. Besides, you’re Mocha’s favorite person, I wouldn't kick you out.” Your teasing was lighthearted, but the smile on your lips was bittersweet, you always hated when Leon left. He’s become a part of your life you didn’t want to give up. Friend didn’t seem like a strong enough word, but you couldn’t think of any other word. 

“Oh, I see. You want me to stick around for the cat,” He gave you a tender laugh, though it didn’t meet his eyes. 

What happened? Did I do this? You thought to yourself. Maybe you forced him to open wounds he would rather forget. It's only been a few months since Raccoon City fell. Perhaps you should have waited before pressing him for details of that horrible night.

You covered your worry, “Well, she does deserve everything she wants.” 

He laughed again at your words, “Even when she wakes us up at 5am.” Leon snorted before putting a hesitant hand on your shoulder, “Take care of yourself ok?”

You felt…warm whenever he touched you. In any proximity. You felt warm, safe and cared for. In response, you wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug, “You too. I’ll make sure to write every week.” 

He nodded as you pulled back. 

You kept your eyes on him, and your hands were on his chest. Under your palms, you felt his heartbeat. Strong, steady, but rapid. Like he was nervous. 

Leon nodded, now unable to meet your gaze. He seemed…flustered under your touch. 

Your frown wasn’t missed by him. But he didn't comment. After a moment of silence you sighed, “Did…Did I do something wrong?”

His eyes widened and he looked at you surprised, “What? No.”

Your hands stayed on him, “Ever since you told me about Raccoon City, you’ve been…acting different. I was afraid I might’ve forced you to talk about it before you were ready.”

“It’s not that.” Leon had both hands on your upper arms, “You didn’t do anything wrong. It's…it's just me. That's all.” He looked away, facing the street. As if he prayed the taxi would come sooner. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” You pressed slightly, hoping he’d give in. you really didn’t like pushing Leon to do or say something he didn’t want to do. 

Lord knows his free will has been taken enough.

He shook his head, “You shouldn’t worry, everythings fine.” he lied. He was a terrible liar. Why was he lying to you?

You didn’t know what else to do except hug him. His strong arms wrapped around you in response, “Whatever is going on, I’m here for you.” reluctantly, you pulled back and looked at him. 

“Please…I…” He mumbled, looking at the ground, “Look, it's not important, ok?”

You held your tongue, debating with yourself before you said your next words, “You're important to me,” your words were honest, “and I want to make sure you’re ok…”

Leon swallowed, finally looking at you. His lips twitched slightly in a frown, before he swallowed. He spoke quietly, “I’m…just gonna miss you.” His response surprised you. You expected more from him. Still, you knew he was hiding something.

He’s usually so honest…

Your frown was obvious. But you didn’t push for more details, “I’ll miss you too.” you responded, just as the taxi was arriving. 

The two of you hugged again before he stepped away.

“I’ll see you later.” Leon smirked, but still, his blue eyes betrayed his smile. 

“See you later.” your words were not a goodbye. You’ve found out that after your brother's death, you couldn’t say ‘goodbye’. Not anymore. 

You watched the taxi drive away, out of sight. With a sigh you returned to your apartment. 

Honestly, you tried not to think about how lonely your home felt again.

[melancholypancakes]

This is kinda sad and dark but how would dream react to reader being treated like carrie white in the move. Like she's not very popular, she's shy and doesn't really like going to parties and social events. But when she went to her prom or whatever social event( reader's 18) she gotten embarrassed when her bullies pour pig's blood on her?

Would dream's reaction changed based on is he was dark!dream or regular Dream? Also would his reaction changed based on if reader told him about her bullies or not? Like she avoided the dreaming for a few days( or weeks)

Damn, that is Dark and I really don’t like “Dark! Morpheus” fanfics it’s just way too over the top on his character with yandere tendencies.

So, I’m going with normal Morpheus I personally think he’d be concerned about the reader’s wellbeing especially if she not in the dreaming yet be asking questions.

Also, since Morpheus doesn’t kill mortals I’d say he plagues the reader’s bullies with nightmares as punishment when he finds out.

For example, the reader could be crying curled up in her bed and Morpheus goes to check up on her because she’s refusing to see him unknown to him on her feelings towards her bullies.

Morpheus is going to her if she’s not coming to him, and he is really concern and sits on her bed next to her.

She knows he is there but is too emotional to look at him, “Y/n please…look at me.” He says.

Dream is brooding but is also concerned for the girl while he may be upset she is avoiding the dreaming and him.

He also knows she is in pain, she sniffs from all the crying and wipes her tears with the blanket and looks at Dream with ruined makeup.

“Y/n…why are you avoiding the dreaming and me?” He asks as he puts his hand on her cheek softly.

She sniffs with teary eyes and cries again, “ I’m sorry…Dream….I” she sobs as she struggles to talk.

“I didn’t you and the others to see me this way…I’ve been getting bullied at school and they…they..poured blood on me at prom!” She wailed as she collapsed into Morpheus arms.

He was shock by her sudden embrace as held her as she crumbled into more tears, the reader was vulnerable and Morpheus was livid.

Reader was very sweet and kind who would do such a thing to such a sweet girl?

Morpheus wanted to punish those Mortals but the reader didn’t want him to do anything rash.

“Please…Dream don’t hurt them on my account..” she begged but Morpheus looked at her and held her face.

“Y/n. They hurt you I cannot let that go.” He said and Y/n leaned into his touch and sighed.

There was no talking Morpheus out of this, he was so stubborn and prideful but when it was with the reader he was very protective of her.

“Okay….just please. Don’t do anything too bad.” She plead as she warmly smiled at him knowing how much he really cared for her.

The reader did regret not telling him sooner, she avoided the dreaming and him but knew she wouldn’t do it again and hoped Morpheus wouldn’t hurt her bullies THAT bad.

Morpheus kept his word, he plague the bullies with horrid nightmares.

While Y/n was at school she was chipper and happier, she was doing well at school now and her parents were grateful their little girl was happy and doing good.

Unlike, her bullies were getting bad grades and falling behind due to the lack of sleep.

Well, at least the bullying stopped and when Y/n went into the dreaming to greet her friends and the King she leaned in and kissed Morpheus cheek as a thankful gratitude, “Thank you, Dream..”

Needless to say the King face was flushed with redness as the young girl giggled.

[sakurachan7734]

Love worth killing for

Chapter 1: strange emotions

There will be some Zachary x Charlie

Aristotle pov 

I have been having a feeling that I get normally when I’m around Zachary but with Charlie and Jackson my heart beats very fast when I’m around them which is weird since I’m technically dead and I didn’t think my heart could still beat like I’m in love I don’t know whether or not tell Zachary about this I think he might just leave me if if I do

Florence: Aristotle eat your dinner 

Aristotle: oh sorry mom I was just thinking

Florence: I know but you’re food is gonna get cold

Aristotle: ok

Meanwhile, with Charlie and zero

Charlie: hay mom?

Zero: yes Charlie?

Charlie: I think I may need a hardware or software update

Zero: why?

Charlie: I think I’m experiencing human feelings

Zero: what?

Charlie: I don’t know how it happened

Zero: well I didn’t program emotions into you I can’t fix that if you somehow gain emotions.

Charlie: ok

Meanwhile, with Zachary

Zachary pov

I noticed that my heart has been beating when I’m around Charlie and Jackson but I also feel that away around Aristotle but we’re already dating so I know I’m not losing feelings for them I know that this may be attached to love but I don’t think it is and I shouldn’t jump to conclusions

The next day at school

Zachary: hay Charlie!

Charlie: hay Zachary! What do you need?

Zachary: I don’t need anything I just wanted to see you!

Charlie: ok and can I ask you something?

Zachary: sure what is it?

Charlie: does the average human gain emotions overtime?

Zachary: well emotions like happy, sad, angry and fear are emotions that we are born with and emotions like love, nervousness, embarrassment and discussed are emotionally kind of emotions you learn throughout life i’m surprised you haven’t asked this sooner since you were a robot

Charlie: yea my parents didn’t program emotions into me

Zachary: I mean your parents hate humanity, and the only humans they know is me and your sister so it makes sense they wouldn’t program emotions into you

Charlie: Well I have started feeling some human emotions and I do not know how I got them 

Zachary: well, I’m going to guess that your hardware is still collecting data so that’s probably why you’re saying a fell emotions what emotions are you feelings? 

Charlie: mostly anger, and what is love? Because I think I may be feeling that

Zachary: love is someone that makes you feel special whenever you are around them it could either be one person or can be several people and you’re heart goes crazy whenever you’re around those people 

Charlie: well the closest thing I have to heart is a motherboard and I noticed that my system has been overheating a lot more lately 

Zachary: then I guess that’s the equivalent to your heart beating since you’re a robot so you feel like that right now?

Charlie: kinda

Zachary: ohhh who do you like?

Charlie: where are the only two ones in this room dude

Zachary: well, there’s people in the hallway that could also happen if the person you like is in the room you’re in but you’re not talking to them

Charlie: im not going to tell you

Zachary: fine then what is your type?

Charlie: well I don’t think I have a type I just want someone that hates humanity as much as I do

Zachary: I should have expected that

Charlie: oh and did Aristotle tell you that they need to leave for Greece for about a month in a few weeks?

Zachary: yea they did tell me

Charlie: you guys going on a date?

Zachary: yea on Friday night

Charlie: ok

At the end of the day

Catalina: Zachary is something wrong?

Zachary: yea I’m fine grandma

Catalina: are you sure? You have been acting different

Zachary: yes grandma I’m fine

Catalina: Zachary you don’t have to pretend everything is fine

Zachary: well I think I’m in love again

Catalina: with who? Aren’t you and that guy dating? 

Zachary: we are and I still feel the same for them but I think I like more than one person

Catalina: oh really who is it?

Zachary: I don’t know who it is but I think it’s someone I know

Catalina: alright dear let me know if you find out

Zachary pov

I never thought I would be in love with more than one person but I can’t help but have romantic feelings for my friends I would do anything for them even kill anyone that hurts them I don’t know why I’m feeling like this but I can’t help but feel like that and Jackson has been acting weird lately so maybe it could be love

End of chapter



[galactic-pirates]

Nobody probably noticed that I didn’t ramble about Picard last Friday. Honestly I didn’t have the spoons and also honestly I just really didn’t care.

I think that was a situation where being less than halfway through TNG meant I didn’t have a stake in things. There was clearly an emotional callback with the guest character that I just had no context for.

BUT

Actually I think that is a sort of useful perspective? As without that nostalgia trip (as I only know what I read on wiki afterwards) I can tell you the episode made very little impact. It was like a non-episode.

I’m not sure do I still have to do spoilers? I guess it’s been less than a week, so warning.

The Worf and Raffi interaction was the highlight. Just give me a show of Raffi being badass snarky undercover.

They didn’t really bring the main plot along very much. It was like 2 mins around the “person from Picard’s past” nostalgia which just passed me by.

The whole “seeing peoples veins” thing that Jack Crusher is doing makes me think it’s connected to the changelings being able to replicate people more accurately. Honestly I still think he touched something he shouldn’t and maybe they need him to make their replicants perfect or something. I’m not sure. Honestly I’m expecting to be disappointed with this whole MacGuffin thing. It’s likely to fall flat.

@purlturtle theorised that Jack and Beverley were changelings. I would like this to be true as I really hate the plot of “secret baby” because they were friends before anything so still don’t understand why she would cut herself off from everyone to hide it. The whole “danger” thing… I don’t know. She just doesn’t strike me as someone afraid of hard decisions. Even if she made a decision made of fear when pregnant (and merlin knows I loathe blaming hormones because pregnant women can be sensible!) but yeah anyway, even handwaving she made an emotional fear decision, nothing stops her from taking it back. Yeah it would be “oh here’s a baby, sorry didn’t tell you sooner” but hiding it for 20 years? She is not that much of a coward.

Anyway I digress because while I hate this ^^ and think the character of Beverley Crusher deserves a hell of a lot better, I just can’t see that the proud writers who tweeted (oh boy I have something to say about that shit) about this “epic romance” when it came to Beverley and Picard talking when she explained keeping the secret - that wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t really Beverley. So it’s sad because it would be a cool theory but I just can’t see the writers going for that ‘moment’ and then be like ‘not really her’.

Anyway my last ramble is more of well kinda this I guess ^^ I am not on Twitter. Haven’t been in a decade or so. I had an account for a while when it first launched but deleted it. I saw some tweet feeds virtue of a Trek server I have now muted as I couldn’t take it anymore. I ranted about this in the nice Trek server a bit but people are shipping Seven and Shaw? Like I want to throw the man out of the airlock. He’s a piece of work. I haven’t experienced this level of dissonance of “hang on are we watching the same show?” since Once Upon a Time and the mess that was Hook and Emma as a ship.

I can’t believe that we’re getting to the half point of the season and Seven and Raffi haven’t been on screen together once. I want them very much to reunite and be together. I still want a spin-off. Give me Seven and Raffi and the Fenris Rangers, doing the friendly neighbourhood making a small part of the Galaxy better thing. Honestly though at this point I will settle for Seven just getting away from Shaw. It makes me blood boil that he has basically been emotionally abusive, taking advantage as the commanding officer, and there’s no justice.

Watching old Trek I have seen some gross stuff. I saw some last night on TNG with the holodeck producing Troi for Barclay to kiss. So so wrong. Where’s the consent? But anyway you can say it was 30 years ago and we can now see that’s wrong (it’s always been wrong but ok) but yet even new Trek seems to suffer from some very gross disturbing stuff and the poor female characters still don’t get any justice. I really would have hoped we were beyond this by now but apparently not.

Anyway hopefully next week will be better.

[dragonmasterhiccup]

That was… a lot to take in, especially for her. How in Thor’s name was she supposed to react to this?!

It was almost like she froze up; not out of fear, as it was now clear that Valka hadn’t physically hurt her son, but it was more so just from shock.

“O-oh, um… I’m sorry, I thought you actually hurt him, like that kind of bad, I didn’t, I wasn’t… Are you still sad about it?” she ended up asking, eyeing the older woman curiously.

Another question came to mind almost immediately after her first. “Do you guys… do you still love each other? You guys aren’t mad about it anymore? I, I know you said it was ‘water under the bridge’ or whatever, but… people say that all the time when really they’re still mad…”

She hadn’t realized just how much she enjoyed being hugged until Hiccup came along, and the best part is is that he never seemed to mind it, always welcoming her with open arms.

“M’ glad too,” she mumbled, eventually pulling away. “Back at uh, back at home, people don’t get fancy stuff like this, a-and they always keep adding more cuts n’ stuff, so it never really goes away fully, but uh, I like that there’s no new ones here, I really, really like that…”

“So… while you were away, you lived with only dragons? Did you ever see any other people?”

Her face scrunched up in a mixture of confusion and thought. “You’d rather be in the sky, super high up where you could fall, than a nice hut with good food? Huh… I don’t think I would choose that, all- uh, most of the dragons,” Toothless didn’t hurt her. “I’ve seen, they just hurt people, so I think if I went on their backs, they would try to kick me off…”

She nodded. “It is super nice to have a hut. Hiccup even gave me a bed! I never really had a bed before this,” she admitted.

Her gaze moved downwards once again, a little taken aback by the compliment. “Thank you, miss… sometimes I wish I could braid it though, kinda like yours, but we don’t do a lot of stuff like that at home, they say it’s a waste of time…”

They gave her time to process this, because it was a lot to take in.

That's part of why Hiccup hadn't told Danny, he just didn't think it was necessary, and she was already coping with so much change.

Valka was patient, and at Danny's question, she nodded slowly. "Well, I was able to help many dragons in my time away. But I missed out on so much. I don't regret helping those dragons, but I do regret staying away from Hiccup, from Stoick."

Hiccup nodded. "Yeah, of course. She's my mom. I'm just glad she's here, now. We uh, well, we thought she was dead. I'd rather not spend my time being angry. She's here now, and that's what matters."

His brows furrowed, catching something in the way she worded that. "Adding more cuts?" Adding implied it was done with a purpose, that it wasn't accidental or from some outward attack. Voice lowering, he spoke softly. "You never have to worry about getting any new cuts or injuries here."

Valka nodded. "Yes, I had seen a few people here and there from afar, dragon hunters, and the Wingmaidens, of course, but aside from that, I really had no close contact with other humans for the majority of my time away."

Hiccup tilted his head. "Wait, you knew the Wingmaidens?"

"Of course. I encountered them long ago, I was there when Atali became leader. How do you know them?"

"That...is a long story, actually, but we became allies with them, back when I was on Dragons Edge with the other riders." To think, they could have reunited that much sooner, had they known...

"I'd like to hear that, sometime." Valka then turned back to Danny. "In the air, it's a whole other feeling, it's so...free! You can see for miles, and it feels as though the world is at your fingertips!" She chuckled. "That being said, having a warm bed and food that isn't fish is a luxury I did miss."

She shook her head. "Dragons aren't too different from people. If the only people dragons encounter are dangerous, and attack them...well, they are going to learn to be on the offense, wary of any human they see. The dragons here weren't too different once upon a time, but the dragons and humans have come to a mutual agreement, one of respect."

"He did, did he?" She grinned at her son. "He has a good heart, that one."

Hiccup ran a hand through his hair, shrugging slightly. "I wasn't going to let her sleep on the floor, mom...and besides, we have the extra room, now..." Although, they [being Astrid, Valka, and Hiccup] knew that if that weren't the case, he'd have built Danny one the day her seven year old self showed up, looking for him.

Valka's eyes lit up. "Perhaps I can show you how? Having it in braids does more than you'd think!"