#i’m having to relearn that maybe i shouldn’t try to do an entire class’s work in a week & then break down when i can’t do the advanced—

[rosesradio]

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[eberles]

Love, Rafe ♡

Part 4 - Boston

Rafe Cameron x OC

A/N: For those of you who have seen Love, Rosie you know that when Alex meets Sally, everything pretty much fast forwards about 5 years or so? So this chapter is A LOT. Anyways I hope you enjoy reading! ☺️ 

as some of you know, tumblr doesn’t want Love, Rafe on any of the OBX tags, so if you like it please reblog it 🥺it means a lot to me!

Warnings: angst, swearing

Part One Part Two Part Three

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“Hi yea, I think we have a class together right? I’m Zoe!” she responded smiling and accepting his handshake. Zoe had to admit she came to this bar to sit alone and drink until she wasn’t sad about Rafe anymore, but seeing Nate did lift her sprits quite a bit. 

✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽✽

It’s been one year since Zoe met Nate in that bar in Boston and in that year they have moved in together. Zoe kept in contact with Rafe of course, sending gifts for Christmases and birthdays for him and baby Katie, but they haven’t actually seen each other at all. Zoe and Nate sent rafe Christmas cards with their photos on them to which Rafe rolled his eyes at, but Zoe always loved receiving Christmas cards with pictures of Rafe and baby Katie. She even hung them up as decorations around Christmas time despite Nate’s open dislike towards it. Nate often looked down on Rafe and his friendship with Zoe, but he was just a jealous man deep down. They often video chatted and when they couldn’t they would just send videos to each other and respond when they could. 

This went on for the next 5 years. Baby Katie was no longer a baby anymore, in fact, she could ride a bike on her own and she was about to start kindergarten! Rafe was doing good with Katie and now that she was able to go to school Rafe could finally get a stable job working with his father relearning the business he once knew in high school. Rafe wasn’t dating anyone but he definitely didn’t frown on having few one night stands every now and then. 

Zoe’s life was not nearly as perfect as it looked to the outside world. Sure, her and Nate lived in a perfect Boston apartment, but little did everyone know that that same apartment was where they spent a lot of time fighting. Mostly fights about stupid stuff like Zoe’s hair clogging the shower drain and if Zoe turned the heat up before asking Nate about it first, but he was always quick to blow up. One of those pointless late night fights is what led to Zoe texting Rafe telling him she missed him and wanted him to come visit and now that Katie was old enough to leave with his parents for more than a few hours, he said yes. 

It was just a few days later when Zoe met Rafe at an airport in Boston and of course the moment she saw him walking through the gates with his bags she ran up to him. Rafe spotted her running and dropped his bags while opening his arms waiting for Zoe to run into them and she did, along with lifting her legs and wrapping them around Rafe’s waist to give him the tightest hug ever. They were both smiling like crazy and everyone was staring at them in the middle of the airport. 

“I missed you!” Zoe said as Rafe put her back down on the ground.

“So, are you tired, hungry?” Zoe asked Rafe was they started moving through the airport.

“No..why?” Rafe asked her skeptically. He was right to be skeptical because they ended up at a rave with a few of Zoe’s friends from college. They had a really amazing night filled with alcohol, dancing, jumping around, swimming in a pool fully clothed. The two of them didn’t get any sleep that night; once the sun started to come up they ended up walking around the streets of Boston doing some sightseeing and touristy adventures. They ended up in Boston Commons laying on the grass just catching up on life. 

“I don’t regret Katie, ya know? She’s the most amazing kid. The only weird thing is that she reminds me more of you than Olivia, but I think that’s because I love her.” Rafe spoke as he started to move closer to Zoe. They were both laying in the grass but their faces were closer than ever. Rafe looked between Zoe’s eyes and lips a few times before deciding to lean in for a kiss. Zoe pulled away before their lips could connect and sighed quietly.

“We should go.” Zoe whispered and Rafe nodded in response. Since they had been out all night Zoe thought it would be nice to bring Rafe back to her apartment. Upon walking into the apartment, they saw Nate sitting on the stairs as if he was waiting for Zoe.

“Uh, Nate this is Rafe, Rafe meet Nate.” Zoe said politely looking between the two.

“Good morning.” Nate sighed out and retreated back upstairs to their shared room giving Zoe and Rafe a chance to exchange a side glance. The evening was about to get more tense however. Nate loved to cook so he thought it would be best to have a fun family dinner with his sister, Rafe, and Zoe. Rafe and Zoe sat next to each other across from Nate and his sister. He prepared an extremely posh meal in which Rafe felt he was too ‘normal’ to eat.

“Wow, you guys eat like this all the time?” Rafe asked.

“No, just when we have special guests.” Nate responded with no emotion in his voice.

“Well, it looks delicious.” Rafe added, trying to soften the tension in the air. Nate smiled slightly at his response, but you could tell he didn’t care very much what Rafe thought of his food. A few minutes of awkward silence goes by before Nate’s phone rings and Zoe isn’t surprised when he leaves dinner to answer it.

“Who was that?” Zoe asked with a raised eyebrow when he returned to the table.

“Can we just talk about it later, please?” Nate said quietly trying to keep their business out of Rafe’s ears.

“No, tell me now, Nate.” Zoe said getting a little angry, she knew who it was and she wanted Nate to say it.

“It was Melissa, okay? For fucks sakes, you can never leave anything alone!” Nate started off quiet but he yelling by the end of his sentence. It didn’t take long for him to abruptly stand up from the table and throw his dish in the sink breaking it in the process, before he stormed off.

“Who is Melissa?” Rafe asked Zoe quietly.

“The girl Nate cheated on me with a few months ago.” Zoe whispered, trying to wrap her brain around the fact it was happening again, but she had a gut feelings when he ran off to answer the phone. Nate would’ve never done that if it were anyone else calling which is why she pushed for him to tell her who it was. Zoe knew she should’ve told Rafe when it happened, but she was embarrassed and Nate promised it was over and then it didn’t mean anything. Rafe didn’t ask anymore questions even though he had about a dozen more upon hearing her answer. 

“Well, at least we still have that art show to go to later!” Nate’s sister spoke out once Nate returned back downstairs with the rest of you. Although the art show wasn’t exactly good either. It didn’t take long for Rafe to get fed up with the lies around him and storm out, but he didn’t expect Zoe to leave Nate’s side and follow him out.

“Rafe! Where are you going?” Zoe yelled out, following Rafe down the side walk.

“I’m going back to Outer Banks, Zoe! I shouldn’t be here and you know that!” Rafe said back while raising his arms up in the air as he turned around to face Zoe.

“Rafe, what? Everything’s fine, Nate and I act like that all the time.” Zoe breathed out once she caught up to him.

“Oh that’s great, i’m so glad you’re fine, but i’m not, we were out together all night Zoe, and you didn’t even tell me your boyfriend is cheating on you! Why am I here, Zoe? So you can get back at him?” Rafe questioned her.

“You’re here because I wanted to see you! Jesus, you’re my best friend!” Zoe yelled back, getting defensive. 

“Or maybe you needed someone that you know well enough to point out what’s right in front of you.” Rafe spoke, trying to be gentle with Zoe.

“What are you even talking about, Rafe?” Zoe said while slumping her shoulders down, already exhausted from this conversation.

“This entire thing is so fucked up, Zoe! God damnit! Open your eyes!” Rafe yelled, getting frustrated.

“I don’t know if you’re like jealous of my life here seeing what you could’ve had if you didn’t get a girl pregnant or what, Rafe, but you need to relax.” Zoe said as she felt her eyes start to fill with tears.

“I’m not jealous, Zoe, I feel sorry for you, and I can’t do this.” Rafe laughed out and walked away from Zoe leaving her on the side walk for the second time that night. 

Part 5

[cinanamon]

marching band!taehyung

saxophonist!taehyung x color guard!reader 

a/n: majority of this is from my own experience

Taehyung had been into the saxophone since he was little

he wasn’t a prodigy; he took classes in school but he was far from the best

It took a while to even make a sound, but he didn’t let that bring him down

sure, Taehyung wished he could be first saxophone by his middle school performance, but he wasn’t there to be the best; Taehyung just loved playing saxophone

So when he was picking classes for high school, his eyes gravitated towards band

Marching band was necessary if you took the class, but Taehyung didn’t mind—maybe because he didn’t know what it was

So Summer rolled around and that meant one thing: band camp

It was odd; he woke up early for once in a long time, and his eyes widened in awe as the band field came into view, tens of teens with instruments mingling upon the field

Taehyung was excited; these were his people

You, on the other hand, did not meet him until your junior year

you had joined freshman year with him, but you had been more on the shyer side, and you mostly stuck to the other color guard girls

But now, you were a vet; you had felt like you had been doing this all your life when you came back for band camp the third year.

You hated the heat, you hated the long hours, you hated the attitude the newbies gave you, and you hated relearning how to march

The band directors only really cared for the band, leaving color guard to trail behind and follow along

It was tedious; waiting for the “ready, set , march!” before marching in step and resetting instantly if even one person was off

Thankfully, color guard could go inside to learn moves with a flag

But, alas, you’d always have to come back outside to try them out in your sets, which you’d have to help the newbies find

A week passes before you can begin going through the beginning of the show

And you’re annoyed; you’re tired and bored from working on the show for hours already and resetting hundreds of time after a 16 count

So you might have been a little lazy, a little reckless as you entered your set within a circle of saxophones to do your toss

It’s successful, and you raise your flag and turn, prepared to flee from the circle to reach your next set within an 8 count—

And your flag slams down on the shoulder’s of an unsuspecting saxophone. You’re instantly awake and you try to stammer an apology as you continue moving to your set, but the boy only gives you a tight smile past his wince. The show must go on

You cringe but continue. After the director calls for you to relax, you turn to go apologize directly, but the boy is talking in a large group so you sigh and decide to wait as you go on a water break

And it kills you when you redo the set because now the boy gives you a wide berth, and you can’t help but feel embarrassed rather than thankful

And as the sets progress, you find yourself at the back of the field, nearly alone

You sigh; this was going to be boring

That was, until the boy you smacked strongly with a large metal pole found his set on the yard-line beside you

your eyes trailed up to the sky, and you questioned what you did in a past life before you brought your gaze back down to find him smiling at you

And his smile was so bright and genuine that you found it even harder to look right at him as you flushed

God his smile was even brighter than the sun for Christ’s sake, so where could you look without going blind, really?

“Um, I’m sorry for hitting you with my flag, again.” you brought a hand up to scratch the back of your sweaty neck

He laughed, causing his wet and wild hair to shake from behind his headband. “It’s really no problem! There was no where for you to go between us. Did I give you enough room?”

“Uh, yeah! Yeah; thank you.” And he smiled again and it was contagious enough to raise the corners of your lips too

A friendship began to bloom between the both of you as you continued to find sets beside each other as the year progressed, from the beginner to the ballad to the closer; for nearly all 10 minutes of the show, you were never farther than three football yards. 

You spent much of your time (when not being forced to repeat sets for hours at a time) talking the day away and cloudwatching. You’d both lay down, heads beside each other but bodies opposing, and point out what you’d see, question the theme of life, and discuss trivial matters like how you were going to eat your whole fridge after practice ended

He’d always laugh at that and you couldn’t help but feel a warm and fuzzy explosion in your chest at his happiness, and a hint of pride that you caused it.

You and Taehyung also spent some of your freetime on the field showing each other how to use your crafts

He had let you try and play the saxophone once but you were so bad that he started to die laughing, causing the other band people to look at you funny

And you had tried to show him how to use the flag, but he instantly got caught up in its silk that you both decided with a smile that maybe you shouldn’t even let him attempt a toss

As the hot days of summer simmered into the early days of school, you went into competition season as good friends.

Times were good! You’d smile at each other in the hallway but once school ended and you both changed, you were inseparable as you marched to the band field. 

Things were starting to get serious as the week came down to your first competition: your band director called you all to the band tower and gave an encouraging yet warning speech about being serious and at the top of your game. You were not just playing now; you were competing

You had taken a deep breath as nerves began to set it; that was, before you felt Taehyung gently take your hand in his and squeeze

Your breath hitched as you glanced over to meet his gaze and reassuring smile, but now your nerves were kicking in for an entirely different reason

You shot a grin back but before anything else could be done, your band director dismissed you to go home

You didn’t get to ask any questions as Taehyung said goodbye to you, and you didn’t have the guts to say anything else the next day

Your first competition rolled around and you overall let yourself enjoy it; after all, you knew how it went down

Your band showed up early to the band field to practice, ate a quick pre-made lunch, and then you all filed onto the buses.

Bus-rides were long, so many of the guard girls took naps or played on their phones in lounge wear; you and your friends chose to play cards in your small junction of four seats to pass the time.

When you were within 30 minutes of the competition school, you all would pull out your bags and begin working on your hair and makeup, which was never easy; many girls would grow frustrated trying to do their eyeliner and it was common to see mirrors and bobby-pins being passed numerous times around the bus.

Once you arrived and you all received your arm bands, you had around two hours to get food and see other performances before you had to be back at the bus fully dressed and ready to practice. 

Instantly after you came down the bus steps, Taehyung bounced beside you with a grin and a skip in his step. “Ready to go?”

You smiled in amusement. “Go where?”

He grabbed your hand and pulled you along before replying, “To get food, of course!” You couldn’t help the laugh and blush that came forth from your lips and upon your cheeks

And it was fun; you both stayed in the long line to buy some nachos before sharing them as you sat in the bleachers to watch show after show, some better than others

It was always so exciting to see what other bands had come up with that year, but there was always a nervous energy that would twist itself in your stomach as you began to compare your band to theirs

Taehyung would always bump your shoulder to get you out of your thoughts though, because Taehyung knew; he would give you a radiant yet gentle smile and you were instantly fine

You both had pushed your time a little too much to watch one more show, so you only had five minutes to dress. He rushed you back to your bus and you hurried on to get your uniform as he trailed back to get on his hat and gloves.

The other girls teased and rushed you and you whipped your head around; you didn’t have time to go up to the school now to change, especially if there was a line...

“Do you think I can change here?”

Another vet eyed you for a second before shrugging, “I don’t see why not.”

And so you ducked behind the seat and began to strip

You had changed partially and gotten your uniform up your legs, but as you began to pull it up over your torso, you saw Taehyung’s head pop up over the rail for the stairs

He hadn’t looked up just yet, still adjusting his gloves as he said, “Hey, director said he’s ready for us now—(y/n), oh my God, I’m so sorry!” And Taehyung nearly tumbled down the stairs onto the asphalt with how quickly he rushed off the bus, his face a matching shade of red to yours

The girls around you stared in shock for a second before laughing loudly, beginning to tease you ferociously. You scowled and ignored your blush as you yanked the uniform up all the way

As you made your way off the bus and gathered up your flags, Taehyung fell into step with you quietly. “I thought you were inside changing.”

You didn’t meet his eye but shrugged; you didn’t want to make it awkward. “There wasn’t enough time; sorry for not warning you.”

“No! No, I’m sorry for not warning you that I was coming on the bus.”

You just laughed and shook your head. “You just said you didn’t know I was on the bus,” You looked over at him and bumped his shoulder. “It’s okay, really!” He still seemed to feel bad and embarrassed, but he managed a smile and it seemed to instantly fall behind you

You two separated as your band practiced for 30 minutes before your performance. You took a deep breath and met Taehyung’s encouraging bright smile as you stepped upon the field. 

Once the music started, your mind went blank. Performing became muscle memory and yet it was all you focused on. Keep your head up, smile, keep in time, move here, fully extend, and breathe and toss—!

And the show was over. Your breathing was irregular as you stayed still for a few moments before you rushed to pick up any flags on the field around you, eventually falling into line as you exited the field

Everyone changed and got a snack before you all went back to the other side of the field with the other bands for judging. You weren’t able to sit with Taehyung since you had to sit with your sections, but you shot him a bright smile when your band got third. Not bad for your first competition!

You gushed about it to him all the way to your bus, where you and the other guard girls cheered and celebrated all the ride home.

Band season went by like a whirlwind from that point on. It was fun, it was taxing, and it was busy. There was a systematic schedule you had stuck to, and you had to do a doubletake when you realized that it was nearly the end of October. 

And with that thought it sent a painful shock throughout your heart that you were nearly out of time with spending band with Taehyung. 

Well, it wasn’t like you were losing him—you were still friends and still had next year and winter guard season coming up—but the near-constant time spent with Taehyung had been the highlight of band.

You tried to ignore it as you made your way to your final competition. Practice started as normal; early, hot, and taxing. But the whole band didn’t dare complain, because you were all working hard; you all knew it was your final competitions, and you all wanted to give it your best. 

Taehyung hadn’t mentioned how little you’d see each other once band was over, but you could tell he was thinking about it by his constant glances on the field. 

You don’t get a chance to talk until you get off the bus at the state championship, and even then, Taehyung doesn’t act any different: you have fun, but you don’t talk seriously. But if you were honest, you don’t think you could handle that emotional turmoil on top of your nerves for the competition. 

You and the rest of the band try to focus on practicing and working hard, and the reality of the situation doesn’t hit you till you’re preparing to enter the field. 

The whole band is readying to enter their marching on set and mingling and while you’re trying to discuss flag placements with the girl beside you, Taehyung pops up beside you, breathless. 

He hesitates at your startled expression but he puts his hands up as he speaks in a rush. “Look, I’m just going to say it because I’m already so nervous, and I don’t think I can wait till after the show—”

You contort your brows but present a smile. “Taehyung? What—?”

“—And I know this is probably terrible timing for you and me because I don’t even know how you’re going to react and I really hope this doesn’t mess you up during the show but—”

“Taehyung—”

“—I really like you!”

And you freeze. You blink and stare up into Taehyung’s bright and fearful eyes with your own shocked and amazed ones, unable to speak.

Before you can accept and return his feelings, the band begins to march. Taehyung jumps up (nervous from just confessing and being late) and leaves you quickly to make it to his set without losing points

You also quickly ready yourself, but your mind is spinning 

And thank God color guard relied on muscle memory or you would’ve been screwed. Though you were focused on the show and your movements, part of you was very, very dizzy and far-away. If anything, it thankfully kept your nerves away.

This time as the show ended, you were still pumped full of adrenaline as you marched off the field and once you set down your flags, you instantly turned in Taehyung’s direction and stalked up to him.

He instantly flushed at your narrowed gaze, ready to apologize for liking you and confessing at the worst possible time that he probably messed you up—

Until you yanked him down by the collar to press your lips to his

His eyes widened before he kissed back, and now he was the one left feeling dizzy as you pulled away

“How dare—” you hissed, a firm grim still kept on his shirt, “—you tell me you like me without letting me tell you it back?” 

And Taehyung flushed as your fake anger burst into a beautiful and wide smile as you pulled him in for anther kiss. This time, he managed to clear his throat with a matching smile and roaring blush, “Glad you could return the favor.”

And though you two were teased to death from the entire band (apparently the saxophone section had known for months), you both found it easy to ignore them as you gazed upon each other

You two were beyond happy, and you didn’t think you could be anymore-so until your band was announced to have received first place

Your band surged to life in gasps and cheers, and Taehyung held your face between your kiss as he laughed in disbelief before he picked you up and twirled you around by your waist

He lowered you back down to kiss you passionately and happily, and you knew high school couldn’t get better than this

You’d have to remember to thank your mom for nagging you to join band

[zarekthelordofthefries]

Any tips for putting together a Monster Of The Week game? I'm making a campaign and haven't ever played before 😅

Oh, sure! Some of this might be kind of basic stuff that you might’ve covered already but since I don’t know where you’re at in the process yet I’ll try to give some general starting stuff advice. (From your phrasing I’m gonna assume you’re the GM for this.) (Also, uh, some of this got kind of long-winded, but mostly it’s stuff I feel is really important)

Initial thing to consider: Have you played a Powered By The Apocalypse game like MotW before? If not, it’s important to get into the right headspace for it, especially if you’re coming into it off of playing another game, like D&D. D&D and MotW have pretty different design philosophies. Getting into things like “You as the GM don’t plan scenes, you plan a situation” and “You literally never roll, only the players do, you just make your moves” – or hell, the entire concept of GM moves – can be difficult to grasp if you’re like most roleplayers and are coming off a background primarily of D&D, where the GM plans dungeon setpieces and is encouraged to make a ton of rolls and doesn’t really have a system of responding to players’ roll failures in the way GM moves function. I don’t really have any particular advice for this, it’s just kind of a mental unlearning-relearning process anyone has to go through when they pick up a new game. But again, I don’t know your gaming background – you might’ve already cleared this step, it’s just something to keep in mind!

So, I think an important early step in ANY game is having an in-depth conversation with your group about what you want to get out of the game. In fact, I would say the most important early thing in MotW, moreso than the players picking their playbooks, is to have a group discussion of what style of game you want. MotW supports several styles of play that can give you very different-feeling games. You can use MotW to play Supernatural, Buffy, The X-Files, Scooby-Doo, The Dresden Files, or something in between two or more of those – and it’s not gonna be fun if you start playing what you want to be Supernatural and the players want to be Buffy. Talk to your players about tone first and foremost – do you, as a group, prefer something very silly (Scooby-Doo), something grim and brutal (Supernatural), or something in the middle (Buffy)? The MOST IMPORTANT part of this is talking to your players about boundaries. MotW is an action-horror game, and horror comes in many forms that can be touchy for some folks. Talk about what might or might not be comfortable for everyone at the table when it comes to serious subjects that might come up in the game.

Another aspect of that early discussion, less important than boundary-setting but definitely important for the type of story you want to build together, is what kind of setting and style you want for the game. I think it can be useful to establish early on what ties the player characters together. It could just be a location, maybe all the characters just happen to live together in the same weird monster-heavy town and happen to work together, but it can be stabilizing to have something more concrete. The book goes over some of these ideas (I believe it mentions the idea of belonging to the same organization investigating monsters or all the player characters being family members). An important aspect of this is also deciding whether you want the game to be mobile, with the PC hunters traveling from location to location to deal with monsters (this is, funnily enough, both Scooby-Doo and Supernatural style), or centralized in one location with repeated monster attacks (this is more Buffy style). I technically only have direct experience with the latter, but I think both require roughly the same investment on your part, just in different ways (you don’t have to map out every town you go to every session in a mobile game, but you may want to sketch out a map of town in an immobile game, or just use an existing real town and see if you can find a map online – rule 1 of GMing is knowing when and what to steal!).

I think this initial conversation may be more important than playbook-picks, but it shouldn’t be a huge deal if your players already have an idea of what they want to play, as long as you make sure to get on the same page re: tone and style. Additionally, I assume you’re using the updated ruleset from the revised edition of the game, but I’d advise you to check out the old MotW site and its free downloads of other classes that didn’t get added to the revised edition: Here. You’re not obligated to allow any playbooks in particular in the game, of course, but I’d at least say check ‘em out and if you think they work for you, let your players see them too. (You might be discouraged from some of them by tone, and that’s totally fair, some of them are definitely built for sillier games, but keep in mind that can be changed by the right player. My group has both a Luchador and a Meddling Kid that are really human, multidimensional characters, so if that’s what you want and it’s what your players want to do with them, that can work. Of course, if you want cartoon characters, they’re also very good classes for playing cartoon characters.)

As for, y’know, playing the actual game, I would advise you to avoid my mistakes and try to really follow the book’s advice when it comes to early mysteries. Try to make fairly simple, straightforward hunts at first before you start getting complex or esoteric. If you’re like me you might get excited to try to mess with the formula before you even establish a formula for your players, and in a game you’re new to, that can be overly ambitious. (Although you can, of course, get really creative within the formula. Just look at the two example mysteries in the book – in their STRUCTURE they’re very standard, one big monster with a handful of minions that the players have to find a kill, but with radically different styles.)

Remember you aren’t making scenes for your players to run through, you’re making a situation with many dangers (not just the monsters – remember locations and NPCs are dangers, too!) and a ticking clock that the players have to figure out their own clever ways to overcome. It’s their job to be proactive and your job to put things in their way, but let them shove the things out of their way if they figure out how. (Also keep in mind the players can always prevent things on the countdown clock! This is a minor point that I think the game states directly, but don’t start your countdown clocks at something the players have no chance of stopping and/or already happened.)

Don’t worry too much right now about setting up arcs – your players, through their choices in character creation, are likely to give you a ton of fodder for that stuff. IIRC the book advises to start thinking about arcs after you’ve already had the first session, and that’s good advice, but you can probably wait even later than that if you can’t think of anything yet.

Some advice on magic: Let cool stuff happen, but keep in mind the tone and style you set up with your players before allowing something. Magic is flexible in the game, but don’t let clever magic-using players walk all over you. Like I do. A lot. But uh yeah, keep in mind you get to pick the restrictions on a spell. This is one case where GM fiat kinda has to come in to regulate things slightly and you have to decide what makes sense narratively as a cost for the action being attempted. Some characters, like the Monstrous or the Spooky, will logically in the fiction be (super?)naturally magical, so they can get away with fewer of the material-component-type stuff for Use Magic rolls that seem like they should be part of the characters’ natural abilities, especially if you’re going for more of a high-magic game where magic is a little less limited, but you can still put restrictions on things like time in those cases.

Lastly, I don’t want to overwhelm you with options, but I’d advise you to give this PDF a look-see if you haven’t already. It’s about introducing other forms of the supernatural into MotW in addition to the basic magic stuff that the game assumes by default. It adds new “monster” types that are built to emulate threats posed from weird happenings or alien phenomena, to give more of an X-Files or Warehouse 13 feeling where instead of hunting a physical monster, the players are unravelling a strange circumstance and trying to prevent the phenomenon from hurting more people. It also adds options for characters replacing the Use Magic basic move with some other different Weird-based move, which might be near-superhuman physical feats, mundane gut instinct, psychic powers, etc. You don’t have to allow or use these options in your game, but it can make more sense for specific styles of game if you and your players don’t want a setting where everybody can use magic, and/or your players want more thematically appropriate Weird powers for their character if they don’t see themselves using magic often. It can be a good incentive to avoid Weird being a dump-stat for players who don’t want to play a magic-user, but the game is perfectly playable and fun in either style. Again, don’t want to overwhelm you or your players, but I really like the More Weirdness rules and remember how I could’ve used them in some of my earlier sessions, so I want to make sure you’re at least aware of them even if you want to play a more Buffy/Supernatural-style “everybody can use magic fairly easily if they know the rituals” type of setting.

(Okay, actually-lastly, one more minor thing: This isn’t really advice on playing the game, but I would advise you and your group to come up with a title and theme song for the monster-of-the-week TV show that your game is telling the stories of, purely because I found that really fun in my own game. Our theme song is “Stone Cold Sober” by Paloma Faith, if you’re curious. I link the music video in our game chat every time we start a game, after I narrate a cold open.)

I think that covers all the basic stuff I can give advice on off the top of my head. If there’s something I haven’t covered here that you’d like more detail on, or you have a more specific question about how the game is played, feel free to ask! Happy to see more folks playing the game and happy to help out!

[fitpaprika-blog]

March, more like  Munch

Well, here is the blog post I promised. I have been really struggling with food. I talked about this in the February post, as well, because food was also my downfall last month. Food is always my downfall.

The way I described it to my husband the other night - albeit, much more dramatically because I was upset - is that I always seem to be learning about how my body and mind think and react toward food, but I have trouble applying those lessons, and I often have to relearn a lot of them through trial and error.

The turning point for me this month was my birthday. My birthday fell on a Wednesday this year, and it is also ten days after our anniversary. We went to Chattanooga the weekend of our anniversary to celebrate both occasions with a trip to the zoo to meet spider monkeys and capybaras; it was magical. But, because of that and because of the day of the week on which my birthday fell, I wanted to plan something low key for the actual day. I took the day off work, and I thought about how I could spend the whole day at home. Somehow this idea of eating breakfast food all day came up and then, later, dessert was added to the concept. So the theme for my birthday became breakfast, and then I planned to watch TV, put together a puzzle, play some board games, maybe paint my nails, etc.

Two things - first, somehow, it never occurred to me that having my birthday theme be something to do with food was a problem and a sign of my disordered thinking about food and eating. Like, as soon as the thought occurred to me, it was obvious, and I couldn’t unthink it, but it occurred to me way too late - like that day. How did I not realize it sooner that this “theme” was problematic? Second, the way the theme played out ended up being very bad. There was way too much food, y’all. I had to give away half of it to my colleagues at work on Monday, plus I had a stomachache at the end of the night, along with a mental breakdown because I had realized that I did this all wrong. I took it too far. Maybe I shouldn’t have had a breakfast theme in the first place but, even if I stuck with the concept, I bought too much food and then felt pressured to eat it all - which was impossible, and the effort made me feel sick.

I was really upset at the end of the night. How did I get it so wrong? Probably one of the most common pieces of weight loss advice administered is to avoid centering celebrations and rewards around food. Yet, I had centered an entire celebratory day around a theme of food. Why did I do that? How did I not see that this was symptomatic of all of my food issues?

I’m still baffled and bothered by these questions. But the more important question became - how do I move forward? I didn’t just eat poorly on my birthday, y’all. This whole month was pretty bad overall. I just could not get control of my eating. I could not stay on track. It’s not as though I overate every single day or every single meal, but I did it enough that I am sure I negated all of the hard work that I put into Core de Force and dance classes. And for what? Here we are, three days later, and I can’t picture the taste of any of the food I ate on Wednesday in my mind. It’s not still there satisfying me, and it didn’t nourish my body at the time. There was no value in it, and eating all of it negated the value of other things I was doing, other meals I was eating.

I’m not saying that I should have stuck to the same old routine on my birthday with a shake for breakfast, seaweed snack with my lunch, etc. Certainly, I believe it is okay to indulge a little bit for a special occasion or if work was really hard that week. But the key is to only indulge a bit and only a few times during the month. I indulged a lot on my birthday and several times per week throughout the month. This is no good, and it personally sends me down an overeating path and cycle. I’ll binge like I did on Wednesday, try to eat healthy for a couple of days but then, inevitably, binge again, over and over again.

And the eating goes hand in hand with the exercise. I have kept up with Core de Force, but (1) I’ve skipped the additional core work everyday this week and (2) I struggled through some of the workouts more than I usually do. As for dance class? I skipped most of them this month. I was only consistent about attending MADD-X. Most of the time, I felt too sluggish to go, and I know that that was because the food I had eaten wasn’t giving me the energy I needed. When I eat well, I feel more motivated to exercise. When I exercise, I feel more motivated to eat well. The two go together.

To be honest, I am not entirely sure where to go from here. I know what is healthy for me to eat and what isn’t. I know all about meal prepping. I know how to count calories. I know what amount of food is reasonable and what isn’t usually just by looking at it at this point. And yet…

It seems like my addiction to food gets me every time. I can’t seem to say no. I can’t seem to prevent myself from having to make a food decision in the first place. I can’t seem to counteract that immediate reaction to eat something indulgent when something goes really wrong or really well. I can’t seem to dig myself out of the cycling. I’m not giving up, but I am saying that I am struggling, and I don’t know how to get out of this cycle.

Here are some things I am trying:

I am starting the Whole30 again on Monday. This is not - I repeat not - because of my birthday. I had already set a goal to complete another round of Whole30 in 2017, and I had already chosen to do it in April because I don’t have any travel plans, other than an overnight trip to Nashville. I need to start March 27th because my mom’s birthday is the first weekend in May, and I know I can’t maintain Whole30 during a trip to Murrells Inlet for a special occasion, so I need to finish it before then. So that was planned before I had this food revelation, but certainly it could be a good way to jumpstart me back into the land of health. Not to mention that I didn’t get to fully experience and appreciate the experiment the first time around because mistakes were made. I’m also excited because Sylvia is going to join me on the Whole30 the week after I start!

I am seeing a nutritionist for the first time ever on Tuesday. This is something I’ve been contemplating for sometime as well and, again, I already had this appointment scheduled before my birthday! I am almost certain that (1) I actually need to see a psychologist for my issues with food, as opposed to a nutritionist and (2) a nutritionist probably can’t tell me anything about food that I don’t already know since I have been doing this for six years now - but I’m curious. I want to know if this person and their expertise can help me or not. If I feel like I get $35 worth of a co-pay on Tuesday then I’ll go back for more and, if not, at least I know I can rule out that professional as someone who can help me. One of the reasons for ruling out a nutritionist, though, is because I tried therapy and it didn’t help. Granted, my original reason for going to therapy was depression, and my therapist was not particularly trained in food. So it could just be that I need to seek out therapy that is specifically related to food issues, so that I can better sort them out. But we’ll see how this nutritionist thing goes first.

I am switching to weekly grocery shopping. I used to do monthly grocery shopping (yes, this is before there were a ton of fresh fruits and veggies in my diet) and then I switched to biweekly. But I’m still having the same struggles with keeping all of my fruits and veggies fresh, as well as not wasting food in general, if I change my mind about what I want to eat. It’s also a lot of work to meal plan and coupon for two weeks’ worth of groceries, as well as go on the marathon grocery shopping trip of procuring that much. I think switching to weekly shopping will help with spending and food waste, but it will also help with meal planning. If I’m only thinking about one week’s worth of meals, maybe I can stick to it better than if I’m thinking about two weeks - but it also allows for more flexibility if I change my mind about what I feel like eating, so I think I can make healthier choices when I change my mind, if changing my mind means I’m not wasting food.

So these are three things I’m doing to combat my issues with food that I hope will propel my health and weight loss forward in April. One thing I have to remember, though, is that this is a marathon. I always think about healthy eating in terms of all or nothing. Either I am eating healthy all of the time or none of the time. And that is not a good way to think about it because it’s too hard to eat 100% healthy 100% of the time, but it’s not good for your body to eat unhealthy 100% of the time - so that is what puts me in this cycle in the first place is thinking about it that way. That is certainly not my intention - I mean, I wrote a whole post on my belief in the 80/20 rule! I believe in it, but I have trouble practicing it. So, I can’t go into April thinking, “I am going to eat healthy 100% of the time this month, and then that means I can do it for the rest of my life, and if I don’t do it then I am a failure.”

Like, no.

Most months, I wouldn’t even claim eating healthy 100% of the time, but since I am doing the Whole30, that is how it should work out. However, I already know one thing I am going to do when I finish the Whole30, which is that I am going to have a chocolate banana fritter from Sublime and then I’m going to Murrells Inlet and taking my mom out for a nice dinner. And then every time during the Whole30 when I want something, I’m just going to think about that chocolate banana fritter that awaits me. The trick is to realize that there needs to be a balance. Just because I’m doing the Whole30 now doesn’t mean that this is my life forever and always. And just because I have a chocolate banana fritter on May 4th doesn’t mean that I am going to eat one everyday after that. Logically, I really believe in and want to find that balance. But, mentally and emotionally, I am still struggling with that concept.

I will still post my stats and photos from March, probably on Tuesday or Wednesday of next week because I finish Core de Force on Tuesday. I’m not looking forward to that scale, but I need to be honest with myself and with you all. Plus, sometimes the photos show something different from the scale, like they did in February.

Finally, I’m going to steal from Sylvia and try to try setting some monthly goals, so here are my goals for April.

April Goals:

Stick to the Whole30 (starting 3/27)

Start weekly grocery shopping and see how it goes (starting 3/31)

Try at least one new vegetable each week

Start and stick with Body Beast (with permission to change programs if I can’t tolerate Sagi for 90 days) (starting 4/3)

Use at least 15 of 20 of my classes at Dance101

Go to Renate’s class every Thursday (in place of MADD-X because Kevin is taking a leave of absence for April)

Go to Jessica Bass’s class in Nashville on April 8th and maybe one other master class, if I can find one I’d like to go to in Atlanta