#i’m a huge nerd if it wasn’t obvious

[afmis]

Entj c!Schlatt who had a infp c!Tubbo so real ‼️

[cosmicdahlias]

A Night on The Stan O’ War II

a stan and ford x reader fic

MINORS DNI

You work at a bar in a seaside town. Two attractive older men walk in and they invite you back to their boat for a night of debauchery.

warnings: threesome, oral, huge age gap (reader is in their 20’s), slapping

this is my first threesome fic. i don’t write about stan nearly as much as i do ford, but i would KILL to be eiffel towered by them. 😩 also i feel like them bickering while fucking you is incredibly in character for both of them.

You were waiting tables at the bar in the small port town you resided in. It was nothing to write home about, but it payed the bills. You were in the process of wiping down tables when two older men walked in. You could tell immediately from how alike they were that they were brothers, maybe even twins. You’d always had a thing for older men and you found both of them to be incredibly handsome. You approached their table.

“Hey there, my name’s y/n. What can I get for you two gentlemen?”

“I’ll take a whiskey, toots.” One of the men said in a gruff voice, he was very clearly eyeing you up.

“A bourbon for me, please.” The other tried to be more discreet, but he was definitely looking at you with the same lust as his brother.

As the night went on you started to find excuses to come to their table and it was obvious they didn’t mind one bit. You brought out another round of drinks, noticing when one of them went to grab his drink that he had six fingers. You shamelessly wondered what those six fingers could do, when the rougher of the two spoke.

“Hey, so uhh, we were thinkin’, we’ve seen you looking at us all night and we thought maybe you’d like to come back with one of us.”

Your heart skipped a beat, holy fuck yes. You were debating on who to choose when the perfect idea dawned on you.

“What if I want both of you?”

They exchanged glances with each other before the scholarly looking one answered.

“Only if you think you can handle it, sweetheart.”

You smirked. “Oh I’m more than capable. I get off at 12.”

The gruff one cocked a devilish smile. “Trust me, toots, it won’t be the only time you get off tonight. I’m Stan, the nerd over there is Ford, my brother.”

-

The brothers waited outside for you to finish your shift. You locked the door behind you.

“Okay, so where’s your guys’ place?” You asked.

“We have a boat moored nearby.” Ford answered.

You walked the short distance to the docks, arriving a decently sized boat, the name “Stan O’ War II” inscribed on the hull. They helped you onto the boat and led you down to the cabin below deck, you sat yourself on one of the beds. You were a little nervous, you’d never had a threesome before.

“So… how do we want to start thi-“

Stan interrupted you with a kiss rougher than his voice, you fell back on the bed with him on top of you, his hands immediately grabbing at your breasts.

Ford rolled his eyes. “Way to be a gentleman, Stanley.”

“Come on, you expect me to just stand there when they look like that? With that skirt and those tits? Now are you gonna watch or are you gonna get in on this?” Stan said between kisses.

“I was getting to that, move over.”

Stan sat you up and shifted to your left, his lips never leaving you. Ford traced circles on your inner thighs, you shuddered at the sensation.

“So what’s someone as pretty and young as you doing wanting to have sex with two old men?” Ford inquired.

“What can I say? I have an affinity for salt and pepper hair. I find men get better with age, more experience.” You said, momentarily breaking away from Stan to grab Ford by the sweater and pull him into a kiss.

Stan laughed. “Heh, that might be true for me, sugar, but you would NOT believe what poindexter over here has been up to for the past 30 years. And I’ll tell you there definitely wasn’t any hot young tail to go around.”

Ford gave an audible groan of annoyance and started to take off your clothes. He pulled your top over your head and unhooked your bra, sliding the straps off your arms.

He took a shuddering breath. “My stars, your breasts are gorgeous.”

“Tell me about it.” Stan said, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and biting it, his stubble tickling your breast.

Ford returned his attention to getting your clothes off of you. He pulled off your skirt and followed with your panties, sliding them down your legs, he gave a small gasp at your wetness.

“Good god sweetheart, you’re so wet. You really wanted us, didn’t you?”

Stan smirked against your breast. “Of course they do! You think they’d be able to resist the charms of us two silver foxes?”

You nodded. “When you guys walked into the bar tonight I secretly hoped you’d be into something like this.”

“We seriously didn’t think you’d reciprocate. It was a complete shot in the dark, but look at you, so eager for the both of us.” Ford said as he sank to his knees in front of you.

“Hey, you might’ve thought that, but I knew I’d have them swooning within the hour. No one can resist Stan the man.” He said, flexing his arms.

Ford rolled his eyes and lifted your legs, draping them over his shoulders. He circled your clit with his thumb for a moment before replacing it with his mouth and tongue. You tangled your fingers in his hair as Stan returned his lips to yours, tongue darting down your throat, hands caressing your breasts.

Ford lapped at your clit, taking in your taste and scent.

“God, you taste so good.” He said, moaning against you.

Stan laughed. “Damn, sixer. I didn’t know you enjoyed eating pussy this much.”

Ford scoffed. “I happen to find eliciting an orgasm from another person to be incredibly rewarding, their pleasure is mine.”

“Good god, you’re so pussy whipped.”

“I’m trying to concentrate here, Stanley.”

You felt your orgasm build, you tightened your grip on Ford’s hair.

“Good girl, that’s it, you’re almost there.” Ford cooed.

You panted, the sensation of being eaten out by Ford and felt up by Stan was overwhelming. You bucked your hips somewhat involuntarily against Ford’s tongue.

You reeled your head back cumming all over Ford’s mouth. He didn’t stop, slipping two fingers inside you and curling them at your g-spot, he wanted to make you cum again. It didn’t take long to coax it out of you, you gripped his hair so hard you almost ripped out a few strands, cumming on his face for a second time.

You fell back on the bed, you were practically floating. You panted breathlessly, attempting to steady yourself. Ford stood up, leaned over and kissed you, you could taste yourself on him. You sat up and looked at both of them, cracking a smirk.

“Both of you, strip for me.” You said in your best sultry voice.

“Of course, princess.” Ford said.

Stan grinned. “Get ready for the show, sweet cheeks.”

They began removing their clothes. Stan gave you the full stripper experience, running his hands seductively over his body. You wondered to yourself if he’d ever done this before, it sure seemed like he had.

You watched them hungrily as they revealed their figures. Stan was paunchy and soft whereas Ford was more built with a slight muscle definition, yet both of them were incredibly hot to you. You stared at them and couldn’t help but notice the multiple scars that littered Ford’s body. You had no idea what kind of hell he must’ve been through, but it had clearly been a lot.

As they pulled off their boxers you took in the absolutely glorious sight. They were both incredibly hung, over 8 inches. Their cocks were nearly identical, but Stan’s had significantly more girth. Stan caught you obviously staring.

“Like what ya see, angel?” Big, isn’t it?” He said, giving himself a few strokes.

“Bragging is unbecoming of a gentleman, Stanley.” Ford chastised.

“Hey, I know what I got, so I’m gonna flaunt it. Now, on all fours, toots.” Stan commanded, getting on the bed.

He came up behind you and angled his cock against you and unceremoniously shoved himself inside you, one hand on your shoulder, the other on your waist. He was so thick it felt like you were being ripped in half, you cried out in a mixture of pleasure and pain.

“Oh shit, you alright?” Stan asked.

“Yeah I’m okay, it just hurts so good.”

He cocked a smile. “Damn, you like it rough don’t you?”

Ford got on his knees in front of you, tilting your chin up and stroking your lips with his thumb.

“Your lips are so soft, sweetheart.”

He slowly slid his cock in your mouth and began gingerly fucking your mouth, trying very hard to not make you choke.

“You ever done anything like this before, sugar? Gotten fucked by two men at the same time?” Stan said as he started pumping himself inside you.

You shook your head with Ford’s cock in your mouth.

“No? What do you think, huh? You like getting fucked by men old enough to be your dad?” Stan asked.

You nodded.

He grabbed your ass. “Good girl, so fucking dirty.”

Ford ran his fingers through your hair. “That’s right, you’re such a good girl, taking the both of us at the same time.”

Stan thrusted aggressively, each one forcing his brother’s cock deeper down your throat, you gagged around him.

“Easy, Stanley, you’ll make them choke.” Ford warned.

“Sorry, can’t help it, they feel too good. So- nngh- fucking tight.” Stan grunted.

You started to move your hips back against him.

“Yeah, that’s right, good girl. Fuck yourself on my cock.” Stan groaned.

He gave an incredibly hard slap to your ass, you yelped with Ford still in your mouth, a welt began to form.

“Hey, watch it! You don’t know if they like that sort of thing.” Ford scolded.

Stan rolled his eyes. “Oh come off it, sixer. They can speak for themself.”

You pulled yourself off of Ford’s cock just long enough to give a response before taking him back in your mouth.

“It’s okay, I love it.”

“See? They ‘love it’.” Stan said with a smirk.

“Consent is still important, Stanley.” Ford huffed.

Stan picked up his pace, god he loved this, using you like his own personal fucktoy.

“Jesus, that tight little pussy is gonna make me cum.” Stan groaned.

He gripped your hips and got a few good thrusts in before pulling out and cumming all over your back with a loud moan. Ford pulled himself out of your mouth, he leaned over and whispered in your ear while stroking your cheek.

“You did so well for us, sweetheart.”

Your legs shook, exhausted from being on your hands and knees for so long. You collapsed on your stomach.

Stan breathed raggedly trying to collect himself, then got off the bed and started putting his boxers back on.

“Alright, I’m gonna go out for a smoke, I’ll leave you two crazy kids alone. Have fun.” Stan said with a wink.

He started to head out, wiping sweat from his brow.

“Geez, you got me schvitzing here, toots.” He closed the cabin door behind him.

Ford turned his attention back to you. “Let me get you cleaned up.”

He got up and retrieved a towel and began wiping his brother’s cum off of your back.

“There we go.” He said softly.

He picked you up and laid you down with your head on the pillow and got on top of you. He tilted your chin up and kissed you deeply.

“I know you enjoyed being ravaged by Stanley, but now it’s my turn and I want to make love to you. Is that okay with you, princess?”

You nodded fervently.

“Good girl. I know my cock isn’t as thick as his, but still if it hurts I want you to bite down on my shoulder. Understand?”

“Yes, daddy.”

He blushed. “Daddy? How come didn’t call Stanley that?”

“You have stronger daddy vibes.”

He chuckled. “I’m very flattered, princess.”

He slowly started to insert himself making sure to give you time to adjust while kissing you, you moaned into his mouth.

He reached the hilt of his shaft. “Does that feel good? I’m not hurting you am I?”

You shook your head. “You feel so good, daddy.”

He chuckled. “Keep calling me that and I won’t be able to last very long.”

He began moving his hips, finding a steady, gentle rhythm.

“God, now I see what Stanley was talking about, you feel incredible. So warm and tight.”

He and Stan might’ve been twins, but the ways they fucked you were as different as night and day. Where Stan was rough and fast, Ford was so much more slow and passionate.

“From the moment I saw you I knew I would have to have you. The way your thighs looked in that skirt and the way your breasts bounced as you walked, god you looked so tantalizing. When you would bend over the table to serve us our drinks it got me so hard immediately. If you hadn’t come back with us I would’ve had to spend the rest of my night stroking my cock while picturing you.”

“I’m not gonna lie, Ford, I was bending over on purpose. I knew what I was doing. Knowing I was turning on two older gentlemen was so hot. I had to steal myself away to the bathroom and touch myself because of how worked up I got with you looking at me like that. You and your brother were practically fucking me with your eyes.”

“We wanted you so bad, it was all we could talk about.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, lacing your fingers in his hair again. He buried his nose into the dip of your collarbone. You moved yourself back against him, drawing out a moan.

“I’m so close, baby girl. Can I cum in you?” He panted.

“Please, daddy.” You begged.

Your words made him throb. “Good girl.”

He slightly increased his pace, still making sure to be gentle. He came deep inside you, coating your walls in a thick layer of cum.

“Stars, you are… amazing.” He said, completely breathless.

You kissed him as he pulled out, lying next to you. You nuzzled into Ford’s chest, he stroked your back, the gentle waves of the ocean rocking the boat.

“You know, we’re going to be here for a full week. If you want, we could do this every night. How does that sound, princess?”

“Like a dream, handsome.”

He kissed you. “Good, I’m very happy to hear that.”

Silence hung in the air for a moment or two before you broke it.

“Can I ask you a question, Ford?”

“Anything, sweetheart.”

“What happened to you? You have so many scars.”

He gave a small smile. “It’s… a long story, but let’s just say I went through quite the adventure in the last 30 years.”

A few minutes later Stan walked through the door. “Got room for one more?”

You smiled. “The more the merrier.”

Stan climbed into the bed, spooning you.

He chuckled to himself. “See, sixer? I told you we’d find babes.”

[extremlynerdyfairy]

Someone call me Dimension 20’s MatPat, cause I have some INSANE theories to share!!

‼️⚠️Spoilers for Fantasy High: Junior Year (Mostly Ep. 13 and back)⚠️‼️

❤️‍🔥🔮🌹Theory #1🌹🔮❤️‍🔥:

Cassandra is in the court of stars?!

When Adaine goes to the court of stars, I found something peculiar in Brennan’s description of the interior of the place. He mentions how in the center of the room, there’s a MASSIVE rose that is surrounded by shimmering, indigo-purple energy. Who in this entire franchise has been associated with those colors and Brennan ALWAYS described their magic/aura having that same vibe?

CASSANDRA!!!

WHAT IF the timeless rose in the court of stars is one of the few remaining items that has some of Cassandra’s essence?

But that’s not the end of it. The rose is described a huge rose, right? You could even say it’s GIANT sized. If my phrasing wasn’t obvious enough, I think the rose might’ve had a deeper meaning/connection for both Ankarna and Cassandra. I googled it, and it’s said that roses usually bloom around early spring and late autumn. This means that PEAK rose blooming season could possibly be summer. Ankarna’s domain.

So there’s a possibility (or better said a hunch) that a possible old gift amongst these two forgotten and corrupted deities is in Fallinel. But considering the fact that a monument about the wedding is in Fallinel, I wouldn’t be surprise if the flower in question is what remains of a bridal bouquet (roses are traditionally associated with love and are a popular bouquet options for weddings…👀). But we’ll see if anything will from this crazy observation of mine.

👹🔥👨‍👩‍👧Theory #2👨‍👩‍👧🔥👹:

Who’s Fig’s REAL daddy, really?

I know this might seem like a bit, but I think it’s one worth thinking about. Usually Tieflings are just descendants of one mortal being and an infernal being. To my knowledge (and I encourage any DND buffs to fact check me on this), Tieflings can pop-up in a family tree as long as ONE of the bio parents has infernal blood or ancestry in them.

Now, why does this have to do with Fig’s bloodline? Gilear even stated in sophomore year that him and Sandra Lynn weren’t having bedroom fun before fig came along. Well I’ll bring you this question as a rebuttal: If Gilear was always aware to some degree about Fig not being his, how did Sandra Lynn get away with that lie for MANY years?

My theory is that Sandra Lynn originally didn’t know WHO fathered Fig since (and I’m just spit balling here) she probably had adult fun with Gilear shortly after Gortholax (probably due to guilt and making sure Gilear didn’t catch on to the cheating) and basically decided to wing it and after Fig started growing her horns didn’t hesitate to consider Gortholax the father. BUT WHAT ABOUT GILEAR’S DEMONIC BLOODLINE?! We recent learned Gilear is a descendant of Backur and we know that the curse attached to the Feith family is past on to the eldest of the family to the oldest of their children.

What if Gilear IS Fig’s bio dad AND that Fig being a Tiefling was because of Gilear being a descendant of Backur?!

Tbh this is a theory I’m only 65% sold on, since I’m not sure my DND knowledge is correct or if Brennan’s world even operates under those same rules. But it’s fun to think about.

🐀🤓😈Theory #3😈🤓🐀:

Kipperlilly, the rat grinders, and Ankarna?!

I know that the season is leading up to a final confrontation between both of these adventuring parties, but here’s the fun question to ask:

WHY? Why the FUCK are these nerds SO determined to have the Bad Kids eat shit?

Very simple answer. Conquests. ✨ACADEMIC✨ Conquest. We know the rat grinders are basically exp farmers and (in many ways) are dark parallels to many of the Bad Kids own party members (Buddy and Kristen, Ruben and Fig, Oshin and Adaine, etc.). And we’ve seen how salty they are (Cunt-head Bitch face, especially) at how the Bad Kids (despite many of them not taking their academics seriously) are able to achieve things the Rat Grinders think THEY deserve. And who was recently revealed as a goddess of Conquest? Ankarna.

But HOW would the Rat Grinder’s know about Ankarna?! Well… remember Lucy?

Lucy’s death is very much hinted to be caused by the other members of her party (tho, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s revealed that it was someone else, most likely Kalina). But WHY did Lucy die?!

What if Lucy was trying to pull a similar stunt that Kristen pulled in sophomore year? After all we know Lucy wanted to switch gods and the name on the paper for that switch within the school was blank. Kinda like the god’s name wasn’t found or couldn’t be said…like Ankarna. I 1,000% believe that Lucy was trying to bring the uncorrupted version of Ankarna back (similar to how Kristen brought Cassandra back from her Nightmare King form). How she found out about Ankarna is a whole entire debate (maybe from her original goddess or through research, we’ll find out what more episodes released) but we are left with one MASSIVE question:

WHY DID THE RAT GRINDERS KILL LUCY?! What could they possibly gain from killing their friend?! Well…what if the rat grinders didn’t want Ankarna uncorrupted?

Afterall, Ankarna’s corrupted domain (that of conquest, rage, and dominating over others) fits better with Kipperlilly’s need to be the best at the school. I wouldn’t be surprised if the rat grinders’ end goal is to use Ankarna’s corrupted domain to help them (mostly Kipperlilly) win the elections.

After all, Cunt-head Bitch-Face did make it VERY clear from the beginning that her goal is to see the Bad Kids get what they deserve (which is expulsion) for their lack of academic integrity; and, for her party (the group that has been doing things by the book this entire time) to get what THEY deserve. Absolute power over the school.

Those are all my theories! PLEASE share your thoughts. And remember, it’s Just a theory… A DIMENSION 20 THEORY!!!

(Note: I went back and fleshed out a bit more theory #3 because I was writing it at 2am and forgot to add a few of the important details of that theory 😅)

[all-things-john-constantine]

If you’re trying to avoid NMT3 spoilers I discuss what we know from the readings and synopsis and a couple things that have been said about the lore.

Thinking about NMT3 (Miss Holloween and Orbweaver)(THAT’S WITHOUT DISCUSSING TOM AND BECKY AND THEY’RE HAVING A BABY! I JUST KNOW ZOMBIE STANLEY IS GOING TO TRY TO RUIN THEIR HAPPINESS! TIM AND GRACE!!?!?! RICHIE AND RUTH!! DISASTER NERDS GETTING THEMSELVES IN MORE SHIT! BILL AND CHARLOTTE!! CHARLOTTE MIGHT FIND LOVE!!!) and the Miss Holloway Musical. Specifically I think about how Duke is totally dying in Miss Holloween. There is just no way they’re going to give us a happy ending (Kim and Curt please have mercy on me with your acting the reading was painful enough i know the actual thing will gut me). I also think about how we’re also getting Macnamara back. It brings up all the questions and thoughts for me.

1. What was John’s reaction when he saw Wilbur for the first time after the portal was opened? What about when he realized Wilbur’s mind was gone and it wasn’t coming back? Did he try to bring Wilbur back? What made him finally give up trying?

2. Who is John’s husband? It could be Xander, but I’m leaning towards it being someone else. I just feel like the “i know what I have to do” “no don’t go in there John!” moment would have been bigger if it was, but it was mid Wilbur monologue so maybe it would’ve been too clunky to do more. We don’t tend to get super huge reactions to deaths in Hatchetfield shows so maybe that’s just irrelevant.

3. How old is Miss Holloway? She’s depicted in the black book. Does that make her as old as it’s author Willabella? I’m leaning no. TURNS OUT MEG LLOYD TALKED ABOUT IT BEING FOR ORIGINAL WORKING BOYS SCRIPT!! IT’S BECKY!!! BADASS WARRIOR OF LIGHT!!! We could have a moment where it just works out and it’s applicable anyways, but I think we can put that on the back burner and just consider it a depiction of her making the deal. I think if she was enjoying herself as a rockstar in the 1980s she might have just been getting used to her immortality at the time which could make her birth year anywhere from 1900 to 1950. Something about that doesn’t seem right either though. I just can’t get a read on her as far as her age is concerned.

4. How did Douglas Keane Sr end up in Wilbur’s crosshairs? Were he and Miss Holloway friends? He was probably investigating something Wilbur did as sheriff and got in over his head. I feel like whatever it was leads to the initial Holloway vs Cross death match in the starlight theater.

5. What happened to Casey and the three girls Miss Holloway couldn’t save? Is Casey one of the three girls? What the hell happened beyond the obvious hatchet men ritual involving murder and burying people alive to grow as trees in the witchwood forest?

6. Why did Ethan recite the magical hat speech Miss Holloway gives to kids to Hannah in Black Friday? Where did he learn it? He totally had a touch of the gift and needed Miss Holloway’s help at some point in his life didn’t he? I also love the idea of all of the people being targeted by the Lords in Black like Paul and Ted having a touch of the gift even though there is no canonical support for that.

Alright I think that’s all I’ve got for now. Feel free to share your thoughts. I’m clueless and usually not great at predictions.

[sirianasims]

“… it was really funny when Eric asked my father why he was always so grumpy, though.”

“Yeah, poor Wolfgang did not like that. Eric’s getting sassy. Before we know it, he starts school and then we blink and he’s getting married.”

“Cora, you’re doing it again. He’s only three years old. Relax.”

“Sorry, honey. I don’t know why I’m so worried. It just feels like the last few years flew by so quickly.”

“Cora! Are you saying I’m boring and forgettable?”

“No, you’re a huge dork.”

“Well, you’re a huge nerd!”

“Oh yeah? Would a nerd do this?”

“Mmmmguess not.”

“Stop worrying so much, Cora. We have all the time in the world.”

“I hope you’re right, honey.”

“Everything will be fine, my love.”

“So then I told her what the teacher said, and then -“

“Boys, there are three bathrooms in this house. Do you really have to wait for this one?”

“But, dad, the others are all the way upstairs!”

“The horror. Hurry up, or you’ll be late for school.”

“Yes, dad. Anyways, then she said…”

Daniel has grown into a charismatic young man, who has somehow managed to make being smart a cool thing in his school.

At first glance, Eric is growing up to look very similar to his father, but on closer inspection he does have mainly Cora’s features. The nose, however, is clearly Zane’s.

Daniel, always the popular guy, often hangs out with his friends after school, and tonight is no different.

The close-knit group of friends from school consists of three guys and three girls and they often go out for coffee and hot chocolate.

The beefcake is Colten, a self-assured guy with a tendency to brag. He and Daniel are best friends and work out together. Behind him is the equally blonde Lydia, who just so happens to be the daughter of Cora’s colleague Elsa. Lydia refuses to talk about her mother after she left to live with Payton, though.

There’s also Deon, the closeted environmentalist, and Maliyah, who spends most of her time sending Deon longing looks while pretending she’s not interested at all.

Finally, there’s Kailani. She’s very cool and confident, and would be the obvious leader of the group if it wasn’t for Daniel’s magnetic personality.

Daniel and Kailani always joke around in a somewhat flirty way, but both insist there’s nothing between them.

Especially when Lydia is around, because she has a huge crush on Daniel, which is very much a secret, and so of course everyone knows.

The evening is winding down, and the teenagers are debating whether to go home or stay a little longer.

Suddenly, Daniel gets up and stares across the café, looking confused.

“Hey, Danny? What’s up, you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”

“Danny? Are you OK?”

beginning / previous / next

[aftermathfanfic]

D&Ducks

So, I was originally going to make this post for when I hit 300 followers, but I don’t think that’s going to happen anytime soon, and I’ve been thinking about this for way too long, so fuck it. I’m just gonna post this now and see what happens.

In case it wasn’t obvious from the hints I’ve scattered through Aftermath, I am a huge D&D nerd. I love playing the game, I love running the game, I love the monsters, everything. And what I particularly love doing is building characters and monsters for the game. I use a lot of custom monsters for the games that I run, even though I don’t end up using all of them, and what I’ve done in the past is that I created character sheets and stat blocks for some of our favourite anthropomorphic ducks. In fact, on my main blog, I documented a solo adventure that I ran by myself, for myself, in story format as I put these duck characters through a premade advennture! (I eventually stopped, because playing a D&D game by yourself is as dull as it sounds)

So today, I’m going to revisit those roots and lay out how I would build the Ducktales characters as tabletop RPG player characters! This is something I’ve given way too much thought to, so be warned – this is going to be quite long-winded, with little to nothing to do with Aftermath itself, and of interest to only a small subset of people.

Let’s begin!

The Basics

I want to preface this whole thing by mentioning that while I’m going to try and describe these characters in a way that can be transposed onto any RPG system, I’m going to be using the Pathfinder RPG (1st edition) as a basis for these characters, just because it’s what I’m most familiar with at the moment. The basics are the same – roll a 20-sided dice, add a number and hope to get a big enough total – but there are more nitty-gritty rules and it's way easier to kill off your characters.

Another thing to keep in mind is that I’ll be inserting these characters into a D&D setting of my own creation, rather than any pre-existing settings. I don’t have a name for it, but essentially this setting is an undisciplined mix-and-match of characters from different IPs that interest me. The McDucks, in this setting, live as a powerful noble family in a kingdom of united beast-folk families.

Final thing is that even though these guys are anthropomorphic ducks, they’re going to have the racial traits of humans to make things simpler on me. I’ll also be giving them a swim speed of 15 feet in addition to those traits.

Dewey

This spry duck stands with the cockiness of an ambitious hero, a sword in each hand. A bright blue tabard, tattered from numerous skirmishes, flows down his chest to cover steel armour of haphazard construction.

Age: 16 Alignment: Chaotic Good Class/Level: Fighter 3/Bard 1 Ability Scores: STR 16, DEX 16, CON 14, INT 10, WIS 8, CHA 14

In this world, the triplets were raised by their uncle Donald in a quiet fishing village on the outskirts of the city of Duckland, in the providence of Calisota. They never got so much as a hint of their caretaker’s history as an adventurer, not until they found their uncle’s old adventuring gear, stowed away in the attic of their house. Among this gear was two finely made swords, both of which Dewey snatched up and started swinging around – resulting in the destruction of several family items and the near decapitation of Huey. Donald was forced to tell the triplets of his past as an adventurer, and the revelation shook them to the core. To make up for it, he decided to teach them how to adventure properly, in the hopes that if they wouldn’t be persuaded out of their trouble-making instincts, he could at least teach them to be safe while doing it.

Dewey remains the chief chaos-monger of the triplets. Ambitious and eager to live up to his family name, Dewey often throws himself into danger without hesitation, giving no thought to possible traps, uneven terrain, or indeed, the strength of whoever he’s fighting against compared to his own. He makes up for his recklessness by being virtually untouchable in a fight, deflecting swords, claws and spells with his twin swords. The longer blade, named Helios, was once wielded by his Uncle Donald. The shorter blade, Asteria, was his mother’s.

Against intelligent foes, Dewey never fights to kill – a trait unique to the McDuck adventurers – but rather, he tries to disarm and trip his foes, intimidating them into surrender. He’s remarkably acrobatic, and his fights are often performative in nature – hence his level in Bard. The sheer bravado he displays in combat inspires his family to fight even more fiercely and distracts his foes long enough for him to knock the wind out of them.

Huey

This anxious duck wears a heavy breastplate and a red cap, a collapsible spear slung around his back. He holds a large, heavy book bound in red leather with the letters ‘WJW’ imprinted upon it.

Age: 16 Alignment: Neutral Good Class/Level: Cleric 2/Wizard 2 Ability Scores: STR 14, DEX 10, CON 12, INT 16, WIS 15, CHA 13

Though regarded as a do-gooder by his brothers, Huey Duck is just as brave, ambitious and adventurous as the other McDucks. He took the role of the older brother quickly, seeing himself as a caretaker of his brothers and, prior to moving into Manor McDuck, the fixer-upper of torn clothes, broken furniture, and the like. With a resourcefulness and intellect beyond his years, Huey takes the role as both the primary healer of the party and – when the occasion calls for it – the firepower.

Huey originally had his heart set on joining the Woodchuck rangers, a group of survivalists and wilderness protectors on the outskirts of the world. While there, he met clerics and priests of Artemis, goddess of the hunt, with whom he made a rapport with. He even began to learn the ways of these wilder clerics, learning magic that could heal, magic that could wound, and magic that let him shape the natural world around him. In the end, however, he was rejected by the rangers, for while his survival skills were impeccable, his fighting prowess left much to be desired. Disheartened, but determined to make use of what he’d learned, he continued his studies of the ways of Artemis, delving deeply into his survival skills and the art of restorative magic.

At some point during his escapades with his uncle, Lord Scrooge McDuck, Huey became enamoured with the other side of magic – that of the arcane. He poured over arcane tomes, taking on wizardly studies in addition to his clerical practices. He has recently begun leaning more heavily towards wizardry, for while he’s grateful to Artemis for his abilities, he considers the goddess to be more of a tutor than an idol to be worshipped. He’ll never be the strongest of Artemis’s faithful, and he’s made peace with that – wizards get more exciting spells, anyway.

Louie

This youthful duck leans against the alley wall, his head concealed by a dark green hood. He smirks at you, absent-mindedly flipping a coin up and down in the air.

Age: 16 Alignment: Chaotic Neutral Class/Level: Rogue 3/Sorcerer 1 Ability Scores: STR 9, DEX 15, CON 12, INT 12, WIS 13, CHA 18

Thief. Charlatan. Snake. Louie Duck has been called many things, and he’s never let any of it stick. He’s out for himself and his family first, and what he’s out for is treasure. Coins, gems, jewellery – he doesn’t care. He loves it all. He’ll do the right thing for his family (though not without a fair share of grumbling), but he always makes sure he gets something out of it, and he isn’t above guilting or threatening the other party into upping his eventual reward.

Louie is a rogue. Obviously. He specializes in deceit, coercion, lock- and trap-picking, and even forging documents, if the opportunity is ripe. He tries to avoid combat if he can help it, but when he’s eventually forced into it, he relies on being able to feint against his opponents to catch them off-guard. When this doesn’t work, his alternative strategy is to bamboozle his foe, trying to convince them that he’s on their side, or that there’s a bugbear behind him, or that they don’t really want to hurt him. And when that fails, he panics, runs away, and then takes potshots from afar with his crossbow.

During one of the family’s adventures, Louie came really close to death. A screeching owlbear had ambushed the party and cornered Louie alone. Disarmed, wounded, and terrified, Louie tapped into something dormant deep inside him and – with a pop – vanished. He re-appeared a mere five seconds later, but that five seconds was all his family needed to redirect the beast’s attention and save his life. Since then, Louie has continued to delve into his hereto unknown sorcerous powers, learning more and more about them each time he calls upon them.

Webby

This wild-looking duck girl wears a loose-fitting pink blouse and a purple skirt, with a matching pink tie in her headfeathers. She gets into a battle stance, grinning eagerly.

Age: 15 Alignment: Chaotic Good Class/Level: Ninja 4 Ability Scores: STR 14, DEX 17, CON 14, INT 13, WIS 12, CHA 12

Webby is as wild, excitable and knowledgeable as she is in canon, raised in the manor of Lord McDuck and trained by her grandmother to be a silent and deadly assassin of House McDuck. To Lady Beakley’s disappointment, while Webby has proven to have mastered the arts of stealth and disguise, she's really squeamish about killing people for some reason.

Webby takes after her granny as a highly skilled ninja – a class somewhere between the monk and the rogue. A master of stealth, disguise, martial arts and more, Webby may not seem like it, but she’s one of the most accomplished spies Lady Beakley has ever had the privilege of training. Moreover, her training allows her to access a limited well of mystical energy that allows her to perform impossible acts. Her preferred method of attack is to overwhelm her foes with quick, rapid strikes before retreating into the shadows and hiding before they realise what happened.

Aside from being an incredible warrioress, Webby also fancies herself as an amateur historian and lorekeeper – particularly when it comes to the McDuck family history. The arcane and the occult may be guesswork to her, but ask her to name an ancestor of Clan McDuck, and she’ll give you the entire genealogical tree. She knows about every single historical event that happened in Duckland, and she can name all the native monsters in the area, right down to their weaknesses, habitats, diets, and the best method to befriend them (just in case).

Scrooge McDuck

This elderly duck stands with the pride and confidence of an experienced adventurer. His cane, cloak, top hat and bright red plate armour all combine to make an imposing figure out of this old duck.

Age: ??? Alignment: Neutral Good Class/Level: Fighter 6/Rogue 4/Duellist 10 Ability Scores: STR 11, DEX 10, CON 8, INT 15, WIS 15, CHA 16

Ruling from McDuck Manor, Scrooge is the Lord of Duckland, and one of the most powerful and influential figures in Calisota. With a manor full of artifacts, treasures and magical items, he is known throughout the land as the Richest Duck in the World, and you’d be hard-pressed to deny it. This Scrooge is mostly unchanged from the one we all know and love from canon, except this Scrooge has an army of trained soldiers, a cabal of ingenious wizards, and a small cabinet of assassins who have one loyalty and one alone – House McDuck.

You may not have heard of the Duellist class if you’ve only come in from D&D 5th edition. Honestly, you might not have heard of it even if you haven’t. The Duellist is a prestige class, one you can only take levels in if you meet the specific prerequisites, whose abilities allow Scrooge to fight with a flourish. He fights like the heroic swordsmen of old, parrying aside the blades of his foes and deftly moving around them before they can even pinpoint where he is. He fights not with a traditional blade, but with a sword concealed within his cane – a gift, from the late Ludwig Von Drake.

Other D&D aficionados may also notice that Scrooge’s physical abilities are a bit low – that, unfortunately, is due to his venerable age. In Pathfinder, your physical abilities reduce with age, while your mental abilities improve. In his prime, Scrooge’s ability scores were STR 17, DEX 16, CON 14, INT 12, WIS 12 and CHA 13, but the days of his prime are long behind him. For this reason, before going into battle, he typically equips himself with a Belt of Physical Perfection, restoring his physical prowess to what it was as a young lad. I know canon Scrooge doesn’t like to use magic (and he still doesn’t here), but that’s… really not an option in a fantasy RPG like this.

Donald Duck

With an incoherent squawking sound, this sailor rushes into the fray, swinging his fists wildly and leaping onto his foes.

Age: 42 Alignment: Neutral Good Class/Level: Barbarian 12 Ability Scores: STR 15, DEX 11, CON 13, INT 10, WIS 15, CHA 13

This good-natured, short-tempered, and risk-averse fisherman may not seem like much at first glance, but he was, in fact, once an adventurer. And as far as the rest of his family are concerned, he still is. Once a sailor for the House McDuck navy, Donald retired from his adventuring life after his twin sister, Della, was lost to the Astral Plane in an impromptu expedition gone wrong. Though he was pulled back into the adventuring life by his triplet nephews, he has never lost his cautious edge, and he remains as the most responsible member of the McDuck family.

Donald fights as he does in canon – by flying into a rage and launching himself at his opponent. He punches, kicks, bites, trips, and attacks every part he can get a hold of. In the old days, he used to use an enchanted sword, though it has been so long since he picked up the blade that much of its magic has disappeared. Nowadays, he relies on a pair of enchanted cestuses, which are essentially medieval boxing gloves with metal plates and rivets.

Mrs. Beakley

This enormous, bulky woman looms over you, her cold gaze peering into your soul. Despite her housekeeper attire, she stands tall and rigid like a soldier, and the sheathed sword on her belt does not escape your attention.

Age: Late 70s/early 80s Alignment: Lawful Neutral Class/Level: Ninja 16 Ability Scores: STR 14, DEX 8, CON 8, INT 15, WIS 17, CHA 11

Mrs. Bentina Beakley, unmarried, is the silent right hand of Lord McDuck. On the surface, she is merely the housekeeper of the manor. Beneath that, however, Beakley becomes a terrifyingly effective spymaster who has her eyes everywhere throughout the realm. Though her days as an assassin are over, she remains a cold, clever, yet surprisingly empathetic figure – so much so that she was willing to give up her career to raise a young Webby Vanderquack.

Like Scrooge, Bentina has suffered from reductions to her physical abilities from her old age, in exchange for bonuses to her mental ability scores. Her abilities in her prime were STR 20, DEX 14, CON 14, INT 12, WIS 14, CHA 8. Unlike Scrooge, she does not have any magic that can improve her abilities, but she also doesn’t see the need to. She fancies herself more of a ‘behind-the-scenes’ person these days, managing an intricate network of spies and blades for hire, gathering blackmail and intelligence for use against the enemies of House McDuck.

Launchpad

The friendly airship pilot waves at you from the cockpit, oblivious to the fact that he’s flying you directly into a mountain.

Age: 31 Alignment: Lawful Good Class/Level: Commoner 5 Ability Scores: STR 12, DEX 11, CON 17, INT 8, WIS 11, CHA 13

Launchpad remains the happy-go-lucky guy he is in canon, save that he now pilots an airship instead of an airplane. And rest assured, he is just as unqualified to fly it as ever.

[letstalkwhump]

Let’s Talk Whump No.4

Welcome to Let’s Talk Whump, a series of interviews that spotlight the amazing people in our whump community. I’m Malice and I’ll be your host. 

Today we have  @whump-in-the-closet to tell us all about his experience with whump!

So good to have you here! Do you want to start with a fun fact or two?

The name’s Troy, I will be an adult and attending uni in just a few months. I love the colour green, and I really love making fictional people suffer beyond measure! Besides that, I like to read and procrastinate on my homework. I’m a huge Voltron nerd by the way. Will talk for hours about Lance! 

Ok! Let’s start with the obvious, what does whump mean to you?

People in any sort of pain. Psychological, emotional, physical, doesn’t matter as long as they’re in some sort of misery!

How did you find the whump community? What made you want to join? 

Scrolling through the whump tag on tumblr, I would use various prompts in my personal writing. Then I found a whump story that got me entirely hooked and I made an account so I could get updated when it posted.

That’s really neat! Has anything changed about the way you view whump since that first story?

Hmm…well whenever I first started scrolling through the whump side of tumblr, I saw a lot of posts saying something along the lines of “no lady whump and no minor whump” so I kind of made my account with the mindset I wasn’t supposed to write about that kind of stuff. Good news is that I came across some blogs which showed me that not liking lady and minor whump is personal taste only. And so I’ve found that I personally enjoy reading and writing lady/ minor whump in the same way any other character would be whumped. 

Yeah, it can feel like we all write the same things but there really are no rules! Do you have some specific favourite whump tropes? 

Nonhuman whumpee! Dehumanization! Voice cracking from disuse! Stoic whumpee finally breaking down! Magic used as a torture method! Violence!! Breaking bones are also *chefs kiss*!

And a favourite piece you've written? 

For Raising Chaos, I really like this piece I wrote it recently and not only is it a crucial plot point, but there’s a lot of despair and emotional knife-work. Fun! 

Outside of that series, I really like this because I really like white room torture! And again there’s a lot of dependence on the characters slipping grasp of reality to get the point across and I’m kind of proud of how it turned out.

These are so awesome! Who doesn’t love some emotional knife work? Do you have a regular or specific writing routine?

I like having a cup of tea or coffee with me when I write, but I don’t really have a writing schedule. Whenever I get hit with an idea (an image, an emotion, a scrap of dialogue) I’m running to the laptop to type it out before I forget. Usually it’s only a paragraph or so, but if I have the aforementioned tea, I can sometimes get out a page or two before my brain dies.

Do you find your writing strengths vary?

Writing what a character is feeling rather than what they’re physically going through is something that I enjoy writing. The words flow better for me, especially if the character is in pain— writing how the thoughts break off, the internal panic, etc. I get to use italics and it’s great. 

On the other side of the aisle, I hate writing descriptions in the physical sense. Descriptions of people? Can’t do it. Descriptions of terrains and settings? Really can’t do it. 

So in summary, I Iike writing emotions and internal dialogue, and I find writing setting and other physical aspects boring.

Nice! Is there anything specific you’re currently working on?

I have a fantasy WIP I’m supposedly working on, but right now I am more interested in finding all of my main characters’ breaking points. I’ve written like three or four scenes in the past few days that probably won’t be posted on my blog or anything, but they have been amazingly whumpy!

From what you’ve told us, it sounds like you really know your stuff! Is there any advice you’d like to share?

Don’t compare your writing to other people! Mates, one of the biggest things I’ve learned in my short years is that writing isn’t a competition. You don’t need to be better than the next guy. And sure, maybe in a few years or even a few weeks, you’ll look back and wonder what possessed you to write what you did, but look at how much you’ve accomplished! You wrote that 50k story no one’s going to read except your closest friends, and you had a blast doing it! Your friends enjoyed it! Someone’s life was momentarily cheered up because of your writing. And yeah, that someone can be you.

Finally, spread a bit of love! Let’s shout out some whump blogs!

There are so many awesome people on here! I’m sure I'm missing a couple names but here goes… 

@kira-the-whump-enthusiast (villain whump, cannibalism, gore, absolutely awesome ocs!) 

@another-whump-sideblog (pet whump, dehumanization, masterful 2nd person pov) 

@verkja (fantasy whump, has a series I binge read in like two days, in awe of his writing skills) 

@whump-queen (number one whump demon, his writing prompts give me so much inspiration, so much emotional whump)

Any parting words?

Don’t be afraid to have fun mates!

Thanks for stopping by, @whump-in-the-closet!

And to all you folks at home, have a whump-derful day!

[roastyoualive]

RANDOM ASKS || ALWAYS ACCEPTING

Anonymous asked: what is warren's relationship with zach and ethan like? 

Well, it’s different if you mean his relationship with Zach, or his relationship with Ethan. He reacts to them both differently. They are, after all, very different people. Let’s start with Ethan. I know people say this about Will, but in my opinion, Ethan is the real soft boy of the group. He’s the smallest. He has his moments where he stands up to himself, but there aren’t a lot of them. Zach’s kind of a dweeb too, but he’s taller than Warren. (Warren hates this, by the way.) Ethan isn’t like that. Warren took one look at Ethan in the hall, and his first thought was that the kid was going to get skinned alive. He wasn’t exactly wrong. The more he got to know Ethan, the more he figured that would be the case. Yes, Ethan learns to stand up for himself, sort of, but it takes a while. And even then I imagine it can be difficult to get that kind of confidence all at once. So once Warren is forcibly adopted, he decides he’s going to take care of this kid. He has to. Sky High is cruel and unforgiving and Ethan is going to get ripped to shreds. I don’t think he tries to make it obvious. He doesn’t want people thinking he’s ‘soft’. It’s a perceived thing, but he knows at the same time his image does keep him safe. He’s not stupid. He’s gotta keep that up. It comes in handy. It especially comes in handy for looking after Ethan. 

Beyond his protective streak, I think Warren and Ethan bond over science. This can take people by surprise, but Warren is a nerd. He’s a scholarship kid. He’s always reading. He’s smart. He likes having Ethan around because they can actually talk about chemistry and stuff. 

Beyond that, I don’t have a whole lot to work with. I’ve yet to write with an Ethan, and we were DENIED OUR THREE SEQUELS D I S N E Y, so. I’m fine. Not bitter.

Let’s move on to Zach!

I don’t think Warren is quite as guard dog over Zach. Ethan is the one who keeps hiding behind Warren in the final fight, after all. Plus, like I said, Zach is tall. Taller than Warren. And as I said, Warren doesn't like that. He doesn't like being shorter than people. As much as it does sound like a joke, it makes him feel antsy. It activates his fight or flight. Like I said, Warren uses his image to protect himself. It keeps him safe. People don’t mess with him directly because he’s scary. It’s partly why he’s so different at the Lantern as opposed to how he is at Sky High. He doesn’t have to protect himself at the Lantern. It is very hard to feel scary, intimidating, and safe when he has to look up to talk to Zach. No, he doesn’t have to look up a lot, but still. It bothers him. 

Beyond that, though, he likes Zach. He’s a good kid. A little awkward, sure, but a good kid. He means well. He’s one of the first people to shove food at Warren when Warren isn't eating. What do you mean you aren't hungry? You’re huge and on fire. You have to get your calories, my dude. 

Seriously. 

I like to think they share a love of comic books. Warren will read anything, but we see him reading a graphic novel or comic book a few times. He likes that kind of thing. He and Zach bond over that. They go over to Zach’s house to watch the movies sometimes, too, since Warren usually can't afford tickets.

And the three of them play video games together.

Will comes too.

It's boys' night.

[unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix]

okay so the fact that MGG “loved” the Jeid storyline and AJ hated it, was based on the sounds of it actually extremely upset about it, seems super telling. I am probably grasping but seems to me a bit like something he might have pushed, which is gross and not a thing “friends” do when it was something that made his friend and coworker clearly upset and uncomfortable. Which I guess seems very fitting of their characters with Reid doing what he wants even if it upsets JJ.

but god how the actors and creators felt about it just makes me hate it even more and also hate MGG. Ugh. Ew. Poor AJ.

I don’t know much about MGG (or the actors’ friendship irl) but I feel like he was always just into the idea of JJ and Reid together from the beginning. Especially when it’s the whole “nerd boy x pretty girl” trope (I hate to say it lol). Idk if he jokes around with it bc of the unauthorized docs as an example and he jokes around a bunch in general, but I know he had a crush on AJ irl if I’m not mistaken.

AJ (from what it seems) in the early seasons didn’t have much against the idea bc she was curious of how it would’ve gone after that date (mostly bc the show wouldn’t emphasize much on characters’ personal lives). And she did admit herself that she saw them as more like siblings, but I think she jokes in a silly “what if they had hooked up” way and understood the show would never go there. Then over time, it seems like the way she talks about JJ and Reid’s friendship, she makes it clear that they’re only platonic friends.

I’m not a huge fan of MGG and for some reason, he doesn’t vibe so much with me. But I’m not sure if he’s the one that pushed for the prison storyline also and it was honestly unnecessary for the show (I think the reason was to put him in more dramatic scenes which to me is off bc he’s not so good of an actor haha). So it wouldn’t surprise me a lot that he wanted this jeid storyline and it makes no sense, like for what? For Reid’s closure on JJ “reciprocating” his feelings? It seems more like an opportunity for his to show off dramatic acting but let me tell you… he wasn’t even that great in the eps for jeid! In fact, AJ did way more work carrying the storyline she didn’t even want and was forced to perform. She did her job well and still hated it. And it makes me more mad too when Erica finally decided to go against even her own narrative of JJ and Reid being like siblings, just for more pain to Reid’s character (her profiting character). Little to no regard to how it will affect JJ’s character! And AJ thankfully knows her character well enough that it does not look good on her part (especially with the obvious fact that she’s married).

[sigynpenniman]

Psst, Sigyn... please tell us about airports...

GOOD MORNING. LETS TALK ABOUT AIRPORTS

Okay let’s begin with my baby my beloved my one true love, my home airport, place of the monorails, Orlando International Airport, MCO:

I thought it was just local pride that made me love this airport but i have officially been to a dozen others around the world and there’s no one else like her. she’s got a hotel inside. I love her 💗

So all airports* in the world have a 3 letter** identifying code that denotes them, for combined baggage handling and passenger handling reasons. These are the codes you likely use to talk about airports in passing like LAX, ORD (OHare), JFK, etc etc. Many of these codes are based somehow on the initials of the name of the airport, but because obviously there are airports with similar initials in the world, if someone else gets to your initials first, or they’re not usable for some other reason, you have to get creative. This is the case with MCO. I’m not 100% sure WHY MCO wasn’t able to use its actual initials. I assume there’s another airport somewhere in the world using OIA, but that info is impossible to find on google because - drumroll please - all the fucking results for “OIA” are filled with results for MCO because EVERYONE THINKS THAT’S THE AIRPORT CODE, and I’m totally using this as a soapbox to complain about one of my least favorite local jargon specific pet peeves. A tremendous percentage of the Orlando has become convinced that the code for MCO is in fact OIA (for Orlando International Airport) but it very much is not, in any coding scheme. I have heard advertising do this. I have heard radio hosts do this. I have heard self important middle aged men trying to make themselves sound smarter than me in a conversation about airports do this. It’s still wrong. It’s not OIA. There’s no such place. If you pull up airports by code and put in OIA you’re getting the wrong airport if anything at all.

I will say that most flight search tools like google flights and etc seem to have been coded to account for this particular habit and will throw you Orlando if you type in OIA, but for some reason this particular misconception seems to be weirdly persistent and is said with such incredible confidence so often that it makes me a little nuts. She’s the best airport in the world! Respect her!

Okay thank you for subscribing to Airport Facts let’s fucking go

The busiest airport in the world is Hartsfeild-Jackson (ATL) in Atlanta which does around 1,000 flights a day, is somewhere over 3 million square feet (I can’t find good numbers for this as many of the estimates only include one of the terminals and even those only seem to be covering passenger accessible space, when this place has SO MUCH non-passenger accessible space it may be over 4 million), covers FOUR THOUSAND SEVEN HUNDRED ACRES, and by virtue of being Delta’s main hub is the airport the most people in the world have seen the inside of during a geographically nonsensical layover for no obvious reason. Flying Delta from New York to Chicago? I hope you wanna see the inside of ATL.

She’s a beauty tho I do love her. Not as much as MCO, though. This picture is deceptive, because it makes it look smaller than it is. That’s because a huge percentage of this bitch is UNDERGROUND. I’ve been through ATL a couple of times and while I pride myself on airport navigation and generally being Good At Them, ATL turned even me around. It’s beautiful like an eldritch beast but it’s not my personal choice.

Innsbruck Airport, the legendary LOWI, is teeny tiny and only does about 12,000 flights a year, but is world famous among pilots and airport nerds for it’s crazy approach.

It’s basically just stuck down in an alpine valley and you kind of have to set the plane down into it, which is super difficult if you’re flying anything large.

Another airport with a fun Approach From Hell is Lukla Airport in Nepal which is basically carved into the side of a mountain, has similar surrounding elevation problems to Innsbruck, and has been the site of numerous accidents over the years.

Another fun one is SABA, in the Caribbean, which has the world’s shortest commercially-used runway and is basically a challenge in standing on the metaphorical brakes in a plane.

London City airport has a runway literally in the middle of the Thames and requires a special certification to land in due to the complexity of the approach caused by its being literally in the middle of the city.

And of course there’s Saint Maarten, which has a runway right on the beach with a fence that pilots have to almost scrape their landing gear on. The placement of the fence with relation to the landing planes gave rise to an incredibly dumb but also somehow delightful pop sport called “plane surfing” which is where you hold onto the fence while a large plane lands and try not to get blown off or die from the jet exhaust.

(Plane spotting here is on my bucket list.)

Also in other random facts, the 747 still gets software updates via floppy disk. The last 747 rolled off the line just a couple of days ago as it’s being retired. Annoyingly it’s often been replaced with the 737 in airline rosters and that makes me slightly crazy largely because the standard 737 in use by airlines has a seat config I can’t fit my most frequently used carry on comfortably down the isle of.

* and **: There’s only 17,000 available combinations of 3 letters and there are 40,000 airports/airstrips/etc in the world, so not all have designations. However, there’s multiple different organizations in the world that provide these designations and while the primary one we think of, IATA, uses only 3 letters that are basically random, the other, ICAO, uses FOUR letters where the first letter designations as region of the world. These secondary codes are often used for smaller airports. Hilariously, no airports in the US are allowed to start their 3 letter (IATA) codes with K, due to its similarity to the standard radio station call signs for the west half of the US (K-whatever), despite the fact that those codes are only 3 letters long, not four, like radio call signs. The codes which are ARE 4 letters, the ICAO ones? Do you know what letter they use to designate the continental US?

K. It’s the letter K.

And this is how you can tell which of these organizations is based in Canada and which is based in Europe.

Also, the ICAO geographic signifier J is for Mars.

Thank you for subscribing to airport facts.

[bc-johnson]

IP Freely

One of the really interesting things about this WotC / OGL thing (if it ends up coming to pass), is how it exposes a way they’ve shot themselves in the foot. I mean, other than the obvious.

Since you can’t copyright game mechanics (though I’m sure they’ll try to sue everyone anyway), D&D has two things remaining: brand recognition, and IP.

Their brand recognition is going to be the real hurdle, because it’s stronger now than anytime in the past, really. They’re about as close to mainstream as they’ve ever been. They got a Chris Pine movie coming out. They’re in the “generic” phase of popularity, where “playing D&D” is shorthand for the entire tabletop experience in all but the minds of the nerdliest of nerds (I include myself in this group, Deadlands4Ever!).

I’m not sure surmounting the brand recognition is possible for any new game (at least not on a short time scale), which is where the battle is going to be fought. Pathfinder has the strongest play, probably, if they can survive the legal fees they’re about to be assailed with. Sounds like Kobold Press is making some moves, too, and more power to them. Good luck, everyone.

However, WotC could have had an enormous second weapon in their arsenal, one they’ve systematically dismantled since around 3rd edition: their IP. Nowadays, I doubt many new players know anything about the D&D IP, and I don’t mean that in a grognard / gatekeepy way. I mean, the company used 3rd, 4th, and much of 5th (with exceptions) to wipe their own IP away in the name of ease of use. Which obviously worked for them - they clearly have the new player base they were looking for.

But, believe it or not, D&D used to have big iconic characters. Elminster and Tanis Half-Elven and the Dragon of Tyr. Fiction books on the best seller list. Spinoff game lore books in the dozens about each setting, packaged in full boxes with maps. Branded video games that introduced huge groups of non-dice rollers to places like Baldur’s Gate and Sigil. They had a mainstream Saturday morning cartoon show, for chrissakes.

Somewhere around 3e, though (when WotC took over), they started to seem embarrassed of their own IP. They released fewer novels, they alienated their own authors. They stopped making campaign settings (leaving 3rd parties to occasionally do it, but with little support or marketing), letting Dragonlance, Spelljammer, PlaneScape, Dark Sun, and Ravenloft wither on the vine. Generic Fantasy World A and B became the primary setting (Greyhawk in name only for 3e, the wildly beige “Points of Light” setting for 4e).

They certainly stopped trying to make movies or cartoons with their IP. Video games set in D&D worlds became thin on the ground, mostly just a half-hearted MMO no one remembers.

Why wasn’t there a Drizzt movie or cartoon? According to Telegram, the character sold 35 million novels and was on the New York Times Best Seller list dozens of times.

5e tried to make a course-correction. In the rulebooks, you started to see names like “Bruenor Battlehammer” in rules examples instead of the generic “Tordek” and “Mialee.” Curse of Strahd was probably the strongest IP exercise, single-handedly resurrecting Ravenloft and one of the brand’s most iconic villains for millions of new players.

But even these attempts have been lacking any real teeth. Ravenloft eventually got an anemic “Van Richten’s Guide” fully five years after Curse of Strahd became popular, a book that lacked sufficient detail for a true campaign setting - or sufficient flavor to excite newcomers. Dark Sun remains on a shelf. Dragonlance only recently started getting attention, but even those books have been premade campaigns pretending to be campaign settings. Spelljammer is probably their most notable effort in 5e, which actually came with multiple setting books, probably a callback to the heyday of Spelljammer (when D&D loved introducing you to new worlds).

But this isn’t about campaign setting books, though that shit contributes.

It’s more that WotC spent the past two and a half decades making D&D as generic as humanly possible, without all of the flavor and characters of their most interesting settings, and burying all of their actually valuable IP.

And now that people are looking to jump ship, the company has nothing more than branding to lean on.

I hate to say “I told you so,” but, well, shit. Turns out all those cool stories and settings hundreds of people worked on and millions of people loved had some value or whatever.

[ekebolou]

...I got tagged in a thing. I never get tagged in a thing! So I’m going to do the thing.

8 Shows to Know Me By...

Okay, so this is pretty hard, but I’m going with some instinct here... Like @afhenley​ said, I also had a regulated TV watching childhood. And I got sucked in to anime right when it was becoming much more widely available in the US, so I had that nice weird mix of bootlegs sourced from older dudes who suspiciously only had friends in highschool and below and like... TV dubs.

But I guess I should start with

Gundam Wing

DID YOU GUESS THAT THE LEGACY ANIME ABOUT MILITARY PHILOSOPHY AND INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT THAT WAS ALSO A WEE BIT GAY WOULD BE INFLUENTIAL? well then you get a cookie.

The Adventures of Pete & Pete

I don’t know if it’s actually a forgotten classic, but it feels like a forgotten classic and I own the DVD sets. Grunge-alternative influenced, slightly gonzo semi-fantasy about suburbia’s inherent nonsensicalness and... friendship.

The Haunting of Hill House

Blatantly stealing this from Henly to appear somewhat modern. But also I loved this show. It’s a good example of how fundamentally different something something can be when you change the message, but that doesn’t necessarily make it bad. I am still waiting for a really good adaptation of the actual story though. Very happy to rewatch this a million times in the meantime.

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

Yes, I chose the seasons 3-6 image over the station because I wanted people who weren’t familiar to be able to see the CAST. the CAAAAST. So I watched a bit of Star Trek as a youth as reruns came on TV, but did a watch through of all the series from TOS until Enterprise killed me. DS9 is so good. So good.

Horatio Hornblower

Honestly some of this is just stuff I own. This is an obvious choice when you realize I am into maritime history. and a huge nerd. The pictures are getting bigger because I don’t know what I’m doing.

Ren & Stimpy

LOOK, it was either this or Beavis and Butthead, and I think this one edges them out because I wasn’t technically allowed to watch MTV late enough to catch Beavis and Butthead. You want to talk about problematic creators? here’s a way to, through what was genuinely a discomfiting and absurdist and hilarious show. As far as I know Mike Judge is cool. But I did watch this one more. and quote it occasionally.

Queer as Folk (American version)

Yet another show I watched when I wasn’t supposed to watching TV and only when special preview weekends or deals meant that our cable company was carrying it for free. But I met nice people through Queer as Folk and learned a lot and also saw a lot of penises. or very nearly. it was hard to tell through the snow.

PBS Mystery

Probably part of why I love Edward Gorey (or at least, a large part of why I’m familiar with him - I might love him because his work is great). This is a weird one because it was kind of treat, but I also kind of hated it? Like, you never knew what you would get, and it was cool, and I loved watching it with my Mom, but it was never regular thing and sometimes my little kid brain just wasn’t turning at the rpm that let me enjoy it.

Aaaaaan... I dunno who I should tag. I don’t know who’s already done it, and who would be interested, but I guess it is fun? and I am curious. Always, tags are optional - no need to respond if you’re tagged, but if you want to: @nanavn​, @dharmagun​, @astronicht​, @leakingoven​, @marisolinspades​

[topknotstrunk]

Review Everything 18 - Avatar: The Way of Water

I want to open by saying that I have been a staunch lover and defender of the first movie since the day it came out. I never was a part of the “I couldn’t name a character from Avatar movie if I tried.” Crowd. I loved it from the second I saw it in 3D IMAX, which we drove 2 hours to see. I watched it at least once a year between then and now. I happily defended the movie to anyone who would listen, how it was a story of found family, of the lack of culture America wants to saddle white people with, that it was meant to be a movie to make you love and appreciate nature, about adapting, and finding your true self. In the lead up to the second movie I felt very smug watching all the “Avatar was always good, actually.” Reviews coming out.

I am fully aware of the white savior complaints about the franchise, but I don’t think that’s my place to speak on here. I am a HUGE spec-bio and worldbuilding nerd. I have several projects of my own that are based around these concepts. The fist Avatar is a spec-bio nerd’s and worldbuilding fan’s wet dream. I think based on that alone I would have loved it, but both movies are so much more than that. In the second movie we are introduced to the Metkayina society, one very obviously inspired by Polynesian culture. From the face tattoos, to their fighting hype up being an obvious homage to the haka, it was a delight to see how much thought was put into making the Metkayina different from the Omaticaya. The titular Way of Water and other Navi specific traits were good to see too, especially the different biology to the forest people with the paddles on the limbs, the broader chests, the more slimline noses, the wider tails, and the skin coloration. I’m so happy so much more of the world got explored, we got to see two new biomes in the Hallelujah Mountain’s caves and the sea, with the sea being so filled out and thought through that it didn’t even feel made up or alien, just like the movie team had gone out and filmed somewhere on Earth I’m just not familiar with.

But the thing that stood out to me in the first movie, and in the second even more strongly, is the environmentalist message. I cannot tell you how much I cried when they hunted the tulkun. Even just the scene with Payakan getting the spear pulled out of his fin got my water works going. One of the things I really valued about the first movie is that Carmen relies on your own love of and inherent connection to nature PLUS what he’s taught you about Pandora to really get you to buy in to the alien nature presented in the franchise. You really care about these animals on the screen, because you know how important animals are in real life, and this fantasy that’s presented to you with animals that don’t exist remind you of the nature that’s all around you.

Also, the movie looks incredible. I bought in completely, there are so many parts of the movie that are CG that just look like actual objects and/or creatures being filmed. Watching it in 3D IMAX, like I got to with the first one, was a real treat.

There was at least two elements of the movie I felt were a little predictable, the death of the oldest son and the beginning of the character arc for Quaritch. I wasn’t sure at first which one of their kids was going to die, but I had the thought really early on in the film that Jake and  Neytiri had one to many kids for the audience to realistically keep track of, and then when Lo’ak kept putting himself in danger for his siblings, I felt his death was inevitable. I don’t always feel that predictability is a negative in a film though, it can often mean, as was the case here, that the movie is using film language well and has good internal logic that’s solid enough that you can guess where it’s going to happen ahead of time.

The sequel sets up so many questions I’m looking forward to subsequent movies answering. What’s up with Quaritch? Is he gonna “go native” in an effort to survive and be able to kill Jake? Is he now a child of Eywa, an his own person? I mean, he’s a clone, he’s not the man that Neytiri killed, he’s not even the same species, by his own words to Spider. How far does Kiri’s power reach? Will she overcome the seizures, or be overcome by them? How many of the Sully kids are going to stay with the Metkayina, just Lo'ak? Will Spider stay a Human? Does Kiri have a father? Gah, I’m REALLY looking forward to Avatar: The Seed Bearer [title pending, I know]!

My only actual complaint about the movie was that I wish they had set up cloning yourself with memories in tact in the first movie. It’s fine in a sci-fi movie, it feels like typical sci-fi shenanigans, but I would have liked any kind of set up. I’m not a big fan of retconning in basically anything and this felt like that to me. This is a tiny quibble in a movie I otherwise loved, though. And the soundtrack was a little weaker than the first movie. I don’t think I can actually count the soundtrack against it though, as I didn’t even notice until just now, sitting at home with it playing on its own as I write the review.

In summery: I am a big Avatar nerd who was fully engrossed the entire movie.

Overall: 10/10 Read my rating system’s expectation here.

[fantastical-euphoria]

my brother owen and i had a pretty sweet relationship.

i was good at baking cupcakes from scratch and making him laugh.

he was good at math and being honest with me. the good kind of honest.

i knew our relationship was special the instant i knew how to say “brother.” except, the way i said it when i was younger, i had trouble pronouncing the first r. so it sounded like “butther.”

i still call him that to this day, as a bit of an inside joke (it’s actually what i have him saved under in my phone). he never minds it, in fact, that’s one of the things that makes him laugh. he thinks it’s sweet.

just like the cupcakes i bake.

i’m not a professional baker by any means, even though owen always convinces me that i should become one.

i mentioned he was good at math. well, he’s a high school AP math teacher, so it couldn’t have been more obvious.

he always liked to bring in my cupcakes to his students on test days. apparently they were a huge hit.

so, the name that he’s got me saved under in his phone is “cupcake czar.” i thought a czar was a type of salad?

i wasn’t in his class, because a) i absolutely sucked at math, and b) i’d probably feel too much pressure by the other smart nerds in that class to function properly.

that was owen. he was a nerd. but he was very down to earth about it. like, he didn’t make it his entire personality.

but these twins, ava and harper, who just so happened to be my best friends, were in his class.

they had agreed to bunny-sit my three pet bunnies, angela, helen, and grace, while owen and i went away on a family vacation.

the drive up to santa clarita was six whole hours crammed in the backseat of my parents’ station wagon. with reasonable (and logical) restroom breaks in between (my mom still liked to call them potty breaks).

“is the one with the nerdy glasses and braces the one who has a crush on me?” owen asked when i’d told them about ava and harper.

“no, that’s harper. the one you’re thinking about is ava.”

“ah. i see. yeah, ava sits closer to the back for some reason.” he shrugged. “dunno why.”

“so harper sits in the front?”

“yeah, very front,” owen smiled in admiration. “she’s one of my really good students. always gets straight a’s on everything.”

“and what about ava?” i snickered.

“the occasional b here and there. i keep telling her to study. she never listens.”

i laughed. “she’s stubborn.”

“yeah. i’d rather the one who takes the course seriously be the one who wants to be my wife,” owen chuckled.

then he opened up a book that he had taken with him, which was a calc lesson planner that looked super complex and disorienting.

he quickly flipped to a page and cleared his throat.

“okay,” owen said to me with a smirk, “to calculate a derivative, what’s the first thing you must always do?”

“uh…” i froze in place. “panic?”

he immediately laughed and waggled a finger at me. “i knew you’d say that.” he cleared his throat again, resorting to flipping a page. “but, no, we don’t panic. we take a deep breath, and say to ourselves YES, i’ve got this, i can do this!”

i laughed nervously and shook my head. “no i can’t. i’m not smart.”

“i told you not to say that,” he tapped my temple with his fist before closing his math book and setting it aside. “alright, how about i refresh your times tables?”

okay, that was more bearable.

“what’s nine times seven?” he asked me.

“uh…” i hated having to work my brain on vacation, but when your brother was a teacher, you really had no choice. “twenty-seven?”

he shook his head at me disapprovingly. “wrong. it’s 63. now, what’s eight times five?”

i breathed a small sigh of relief. phew, that’s an easy one.

“eighty. wait, no, forty.”

owen smiled and patted my head. “there you go. now can you tell me what… four times nine is?”

“thirty-six.” i rolled my eyes. “why can’t we pass the time by doing something that’s actually fun like…”

“like what?” he asked, deadpanned and unamused.

“like… i dunno… rock paper scissors?”

he looked at me like he was properly offended by what i just said. “so you don’t think math is fun? is that what i’m hearing?”

i sighed heavily. “mom,” i called to her, “owen’s being mean to me.”

“owen, stop teasing your sister,” mom shouted back to us.

“i’m not teasing her mom,” he shot back.

it was so funny how we still acted like little kids at times, even though owen was 25 going on 26 and i was seventeen going on eighteen.

midway through the trip, i had only yawned when owen went, “uh oh, someone’s getting tired.”

“owen, shut up,” i grumbled, rolling my eyes.

“somebody’s getting sleeepyyy,” he sang, tapping my forearm with his fist multiple times.

“owen, if you don’t stop, i swear to god…”

“owen, please,” that was mom’s voice again. “you’re twenty-five now, you should know better.”

“sorry, sorry,” he laughed. “you know i can’t help it.”

“you totally can,” i murmured, folding my arms and looking outside the window.

as annoying as he was, i knew that deep down, he had the biggest heart, crafted out of pure, solid gold.

about seven years ago, when he was in the hospital, as soon as he heard about his type 1 diabetes diagnosis, the first question he asked was “does this mean i can’t eat any of my sister’s homemade cupcakes anymore?” and he sounded like he was right about to cry when he asked that. but the doctors calmly reassured him that yes, he could, but in simple moderation.

a year later, when i myself was in the hospital for a ruptured appendix (i got it taken out, don’t worry) owen had bought me a cupcake stuffed animal with the cutest little face on it, as a “get well soon” present. and for some strange reason i felt tears collect in my eyes. so owen immediately lifted me up out of my hospital bed and just held me in his arms for five minutes, even though he really wasn’t supposed to (i was technically on bedrest for 2 whole weeks). and that was something he first started doing when i was much littler than he was and easier to pick up.

i was now about an inch shorter than he was and he still did it. of course, he does it to all our little cousins as well. they all love him.

mom would always say to him “owen, careful with riley, you know that’s dangerous.” but owen would retort, “mom, c’mon, we’re just playing. she likes it. we’re having fun.”

maybe he hated the thought of me growing up. maybe he hated the thought of himself growing up.

and the truth was, i hated the thought of losing him.

as corny as this sounded, he was my rock.

and he was a very exotic rock, at that. but i wouldn’t change a thing.

he never cried when he got hurt. but he always cried when i got hurt. no matter how many times i’d assure him that i was fine.

the only time i ever actually cried because i could feel myself hurting really bad was during the hospital stay the night before my appendix removal, and the week before owen had come back from college.

i was in the dark, and all alone.

when the nurse came in to check on me, she asked me if i needed anything.

“i need owen,” i’d instantly said to her. “he… he’s in college right now… but i really miss him… i know he’s a little annoying but… he’s supposed to be. he’s my big brother but… he’s also my big best friend. and i love him.”

and i just could not stop crying that night.

“w-why does he have to be away,” i’d stammered to her. “i don’t want him so far away. i just want him here. with me. making me feel less scared and alone.” i smiled slightly. “he’s really good at doing that.”

“what does he do to make you feel less scared and alone?” the nurse had asked me softly.

“everything that annoys me.” that was the simple answer. because it was true. as much as it got under my skin… it showed that he cared about me. and that he wanted what was best for me. and that he loved me, even if i wasn’t any good at math.

during the time owen was away at school, my mom was going through her cancer treatment. owen felt really bad upon hearing about it while he wasn’t anywhere near us, so much so that he began to fast his sophomore year.

he lost a combined thirty pounds when he graduated.

naturally, my mom was able to put all the weight she had before the cancer diagnosis back on, as she was now in remission (and currently three years strong).

owen, on the other hand, hasn’t been able to gain back the weight quite as easily.

it was also an especially hard time for our mom while he was away, but not because he was away.

her cancer caused her to suffer a miscarriage, the experience still as traumatizing to her as it was when it happened.

i was twelve. i didn’t know i was going to be a big sister until the day i found out my future sibling was dead.

sorry, kind of an eerie way of putting it.

owen didn’t know about it at the time, and hadn’t found out until he returned home. but i think mom had her reasons for not telling him straight away.

she had once said that he couldn’t be trusted holding babies. which i knew wasn’t at all true. he was a golden ray of sun around them, always.

any time that we’d go over to our cousins’ house, they were babies at the time, everyone would always let me hold them. but never him.

“they either told me i was holding them too gently or too tightly,” owen recounted one night. “i could never get it right… maybe i’m just not meant to hold one… ever… in my life…”

and he simply sighed and looked away from me, as if he was trying to hide his expression. i knew he didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

“ri. ri?” owen’s words and his hand on my shoulder made me snap back to reality. “you okay? why are you crying?”

“owen? did you make her cry?” my dad suddenly asked.

“no i didn’t!” owen instantly retorted, a touch of fear in his eyes as he shook his head.

“owen, stop making her cry,” my mom stated.

owen sighed and backed off of me a bit, leaning his head up against the window and staring out of it. “i’m sorry,” i saw him mouth to me, looking at me sadly.

i didn’t understand. he didn’t do anything wrong. why were my parents always telling him “no, don’t do that,” especially if it was involving me?

but, they also weren’t wrong. he did make me cry. because he had so much pure good in him. the good that mom and dad only saw as bad and wrong. he was an adult now, for god’s sake.

yet i was too nervous to defend him. and that would always be my biggest regret.

my mind drifted back to when my mom was pregnant, and i was about to turn thirteen. we’d found out that it was a girl, and that her name was going to be starla.

“you’d be the absolute best big sister to her,” mom had told me, with heart and sincerity. i knew she meant it. i’d wanted to be one for a while.

“do you think she would like owen?” i asked.

“well… don’t you think she’d much rather have a sister to look up to? a fellow girl? you two would have so much fun together. and certainly have a lot to talk about,” mom chuckled. “girly things.”

the thing was, i wasn’t even into anything girly.

but i knew she’d probably be into my bunnies (i had just gotten them around that time).

naturally that night, i’d talked to owen over the phone about that conversation. and he’d gone silent for a few minutes. which made me worried. but when he finally spoke again, i could feel my heart breaking slightly.

“she would never want a brother like me,” owen lamented to me. “inalways mess things up. and you… well, you’d be perfect for her. because… you are perfect. she would just adore you.” i could just tell how much he was holding back tears when he said this.

the miscarriage broke owen about as much as it broke me. he lost even more weight, only about five pounds though. and his complexion became a little bit paler from that day forward.

yet i often like to think of what could have been. if starla had been born, and she was this 4-year-old, soft, glowing, golden yellow light in this crazy world of ours.

i’d always wanted a little sister to follow me around everywhere and tell bedtime stories to as she snuggled up next to me while we sat together in my bed, and afterwards, i’d carry her back into her room and tuck her in and whisper “i love you” with a warm and endearing smile.

one that would hide under my bed for safety and steal all my stuffed animals and hug me randomly because she loved me that much.

and i would take her outside, we’d sneak through the back door, and we’d play tag in the grass and fall down in a giggly heap and lay close together while we stared up at the stars. and when she got too tired, i’d scoop her up in my arms and whisper to her “ri ri’s gotcha.” and she’d fall asleep right there.

and she wouldn’t have to say a word. she’d simply squeeze my hand to show how much she loved me.

i looked in between owen and i. the car seat would be right there.

then my eyes flashed over to owen.

i mentioned earlier about how he could be the most honest person. and i don’t mean honest like, he’ll reveal the ugly truth to you and you’ll hate him for doing so. no. he’ll word it so it makes you feel good about yourself. he had no bad intentions whatsoever. he only wanted what was best for you.

an instance i could think of was when i was beating myself up over being different from the other kids in my class, back in middle school (i forget what exactly it was that i thought made myself different). but in any event, owen sat right down next to me and said, after asking me what was wrong, “hey, it’s okay to be different. you know what? when i was in grade school, i was a little different too. everyone else hated math, but i… i loved it. absolutely loved it. sure, all the other kids pointed fingers and laughed at me over it, called me teacher’s pet and all, but i did my best to ignore that. all those other voices try to lower your self-worth, but it’s up to you to be diligent enough to not let those seep into your mindset and have it affect you in any way.”

and through my sniffling, i felt a thousand times better.

he put an arm around me and patted my back in supportiveness, which was simply the icing on the cake.

my eyes flashed back to in between owen and i, in the backseat of our car. yep. starla would’ve have an amazing role model to look up to. even if she’d hated math like me. she and owen would find their own things to bond over, without a doubt. like how owen and i bond over my baking, and music, and the games we used to play together in the backyard.

@elliotts-personal-property

[nihilnat]

Your favorite song

[chapter one] [chapter two] [chapter three] [chapter four]

Summary: When Vecna’s curse affects you, someone who doesn’t consider himself as a hero outside of D&D comes to save you with his amazing guitar skills, playing your favorite song to save you from it.

Author’s Note: Heavily follows the plot and contains spoilers! If you haven’t watched S4 I wouldn’t recommend reading this fic. Maybe you could save it for later? Also I’m in LOVE with Eddie and wanted to do something angsty and fluffy at the same time. This chapter is a mix of both. The summary is for the entire series. Also the fic is in a normal font if any of you have problems reading smaller fonts.

Word Count: 4049

What to Expect: Reader x Eddie Munson, mutual pining, reader is talking about a past trauma (losing her parents), friendships, heavily contains reader’s flashbacks about Eddie and the others, Steve and Dustin being the comedic relief duo, Steve being jealous of Eddie and calling him a douche, Eddie is kinda traumatized, Reefer Rick's Shack, Eddie being cute, reader is kinda shy BUT things take a turn.

Spoilers below the cut, you have been warned!

Ever since Nancy and Max started to find more information about Vecna’s curse, you felt uneasy. You had this strange gut feeling that something bad was going to happen to you because you were showing the same symptoms as Chrissy and that nerd newspaper guy before they died tragically: Constant ongoing headaches, having experienced some sort of trauma, sometimes seeing weird hallucinations about that tragic event…

You actually didn’t think about it much at first because you were having a hard time connecting to reality. After losing both of your parents during the mall fire, you couldn’t accept the truth, you didn’t want to. It was as if your brain was denying to take that information as a fact. You felt as if the whole world lost its meaning and that living was useless. You were showing clear signs of depression and wanted to be alone most of the time.

Unless you spent that time with Eddie Munson.

Even though you had a lot of friends and an amazing friend group of four which contained Steve, Nancy, Robin and you. After some time, Eddie Munson, the new addition to your friend group, grew on you faster than anyone would’ve expected.

Before he joined your crew, you ofcourse knew the infamous leader of the Hellfire Club but you were too intimidated to talk to him since he was loud and he had a very theatrical personality. Your mind wandered to the time where he insulted the basketball team and the head of the team called him a ‘Freak’.

You loved how he always stood on his ground and didn’t care what anybody else thought of him. He didn’t mind being called a ‘Freak’ just because he liked playing a fantasy game a little too much. He was also a metalhead and you admired his style from afar.

He was aware of your presence too; You always made eye contact whenever you passed by each other in the hallways or when you were both in a crowded room, you would always search for one another and lock eyes, smiling. There was this tension between the two of you and as much as you didn’t want to admit this to yourself, you had a crush on him.

It was actually obvious because of the way you would blush whenever he looked at you and the way you’d break eye contact very fast because you get easily overwhelmed by how he looks at your pretty (e/c) eyes. He had this grin on his face whenever he caught you looking at him and you adored that stupid little grin of his.

He had a huge impact on you and he was aware of it basically because you sucked at hiding it. But he thought it was cute. That you were very cute.

The first semester went on like that and during the spring break, Chrissy’s unexplainable death shocked everybody in town and Eddie went missing. You knew he wasn’t capable of doing such thing and that he probably had nothing to do with this murder. But you understood why he chose to run away, Brent and his team wouldn’t have listened to a single word he said.

Even though you ‘knew’ he wouldn’t have done such a thing, you didn’t know it for sure. Other than staring at each other, you both didn’t do anything. Not even a single ‘Hi’ has been said.

And you were determined to change that. You wanted to speak to him and tell him that everything was going to be alright. You wanted to show that you cared for him. Maybe you were going a little too strong with this ‘little' crush but you didn’t care.

The day after the tragic death of Chrissy, you were hanging out with Robin and Steve at their workplace. There were new customers going in and out. Steve was trying to find a new girl to go on a date with and almost all of his tries were a fail. You and Robin loved to make fun of him about this topic because he was so desperate. It was nothing harmful tho, he was one of your best friends.

He finally thought that he met a pretty girl who is single but she said that she was going to watch the movie Steve recommended with his boyfriend. Oops, no luck again! He was so close tho, you thought. After she left, Robin started to laugh out loud and Steve rolled his eyes telling:

‘Haha Robin! SO funny. Hey (Y/N) why don’t you shut her mouth up and let me focus on my next target please, thank you.’

Robin was still laughing. A few seconds later she finally catched her breath and said,

‘Why don’t you try going out with the first person who walks into the shop? Maybe you’ll find THE one!’ sarcastically.

Steve wanted someone, anyone to date but was he actually down this bad? You didn’t think he would accept Robin’s challenge but after looking at you with desperate eyes, he turned to the glass door of the movie shop and started to wait. You and Robin looked at each other with amusement in your eyes and you locked your gaze to the door too.

After a few seconds, you saw Dustin rushing to the door. You could tell that he was in a hurry and that he was worried because of the way he acted. You always liked that kid, he was such a goofball but a genius at the same time.

Then he opened the door, yelling ‘Steve! Robin! (Y/N)! We need your help.’

Remembering what Robin said to Steve, about the one walking through that door being the one, you and Robin started to laugh hysterically. Steve looked at you guys yelling ‘C’mon give me a break!’ He then turned to the ceiling, opening his arms to the sides saying ‘What have I done to you?’ with a confused expression and furrowed brows.

Dustin said ‘What, not happy to see me? I know you’re lying Harrington.’

He then wasted no time and ran straight to the computer, rolling on top of the cashier counter. In the process, he knocked some of the movies and tapes to the ground. Max followed him shortly after. Robin yelled ‘Hey! We just stacked them. What’s going on with you!?’

‘As much as I’d like to chit chat with you guys Robin, we don’t have any time for this!’ The three of you were looking at him with such confusion, he understood that he forgot to tell you the reason why he was acting in a rush.

‘Look, this is important, okay? Just help us find Eddie.’

After you heard the name Eddie, you instinctively rushed to Dustin’s side, looking at the computer. You thought that the kids in the Hellfire Club already knew where he was but turns out, even Dustin was clueless. You began to worry about him.

‘Dustin, what do you mean you don’t know where he is?’ you asked, looking straight into his eyes. He knew that you had a crush on him, most of your friends knew it.

‘Look (Y/N), I don’t wanna scare you, but we have to find Eddie before Jason and his team if we want him to be safe. So let’s just focus OKAY?’

He was now going back and forth with rapid movements, shaking his head from side to side. His eyes were wide open.

‘EDDIE PLEASE TELL ME YOU FOUND A GOOD HIDING SPOT OR I SWEAR TO GOD-’

‘WHOA WHOA whoa, Henderson calm down!’ Steve yelled. Dustin was clearly panicking. Steve grabbed him by the shoulders and started to shake him.

‘Earth to Dustin! Dustin? DUSTIN! That douche must be alright.’

‘Who are you calling a douche? It’s because you’re jealous Steve admit it-’

‘Guys, GUYS! Come on, we don't have any time for this right now.’ you exclaimed and you turned to Max.

Max was holding a paper which had a list of names written on it. You asked whose names those were. She said that those were the names of the people who could’ve known where Eddie was. You were a little relieved that they found some important information but you had to start looking for those people immediately.

After hearing Max, Robin wasted no time and directly jumped to the seat behind the counter as she started to look at some of the clients’ rent history to get a better clue. You all started to brainstorm and after a short time, you finally found a lead: Reefer Rick.

****

After a short ride with Steve, Max, Dustin and Robin, you finally found Reefer Rick’s house. It was out of town, out of prying eyes. Best hiding spot for a drug dealer.

You didn’t listen to any songs while Steve was driving the car. All of you were anxious and worried about what was to come. The tragic death of Chrissy was unnatural. The way they described the state of her body made you think that no human being could’ve done it, let alone it being Eddie. But how did it all happen? You were going to find it out really soon.

When you stepped out of the car, Dustin was already giving you flashes to use while searching up the house for a sign of Eddie. You first went to the house, trying to look inside through the windows. There was no sign of a living being in there.. You were so sure about Eddie being here that you didn’t even consider not being able to find him. You were beginning to lose hope.

That was until one of you found another perfect hiding spot just at the back of the main house. It was like a small but not so tiny shack. You had to look inside the shack. Then Steve and Robin opened the door by force and all of you gathered inside. You guys were looking everywhere for a sign.

After a brief time Steve grabbed an oar and with its back, he started to poke an old little boat which was covered with a boat cover. He was being a bit harsh so Dustin tried to stop Steve from doing it because what if Eddie got hurt? Well, Steve didn’t care about his protests and continued to do what he was doing.

While the others were still searching, you felt hopeless. You thought that you guys had cracked the code and you were one hundred percent sure that you were going to find him in here. But I guess I was wrong, you thought to yourself, deep in thoughts.

Then suddenly the cover of the boat lifted up and you saw Eddie. In just a few seconds, he was pinning Steve to the wall, making him stuck between the wall and himself while holding a sharp broken bottle to Steve’s neck. Dustin started to yell at Eddie, begging him to drop the sharp object.

While all of these were happening, you were in shock. Dustin was the only mutual friend that they had and he was a great negotiator, so all of you decided that it was best if Dustin did the talking.

‘Eddie, EDDIE! STOP. IT’S ME, DUSTIN!’

‘STEVE DROP THE OAR! Look this is Steve and he’s not gonna hurt you. ’

‘LOOK HE’S NOT TRYING TO HURT YOU I SWEAR, WE’RE HERE TO HELP’

Eddie turned to Dustin and asked ‘What are you doing here?’ His voice was raspy and low, almost like a grunt.

‘We’re here to help, we’re on your side!’ said Robin, hoping that he will loosen his grip.

And after a minute that felt like years, he finally dropped his grip that he had on Steve and let him go. At that time, he started to be aware of his surroundings and finally saw that he had a crowd watching him. And that you were in that crowd.

Dustin started to introduce the group to Eddie. He started with Robin: ‘Eddie, these are my friends. You know Robin, from band.’ She made a little trumpet noise while acting like she was playing an imaginary one.

‘This is my friend Max. The one who never wants to play D&D.’

‘And lastly, this is (Y/N)...’

He locked his eyes with yours and you did a little wave with an awkward yet genuine smile. At that moment, your heart shattered into pieces at the sight. His eyes were bloodshot, it was obvious that he couldn’t get a good nights’ sleep for quite some time because he was always on alert. He had to be careful, otherwise he could’ve been spotted. His hair was messier than usual and he looked like he was in pain because he was hiding in that boat, folded and crippled up to fit in. He was wearing the same old Hellfire Club t-shirt and the clothes he had from the day he went missing.

And it was clear that he didn’t want anybody to see him like that. He didn’t want you to see him like that. But you didn’t care about his looks at that moment, you were just glad to see him healthy without any injuries.

While you were both looking deeply into each other’s eyes, Dustin had to snap him out of it saying

‘Eddie, tell us what happened.’

Eddie looked at him and the rest of you, trying to calculate whether to say what he truly saw or not. He started to slowly slide down, his back on the wall. He waited for a moment before speaking, his gaze fixated to the floor. His hands were shaking.

‘You won’t believe me’ He said, sniffing.

‘Don’t want you guys tellin’ me that I’m crazy but I know what I saw. I just can’t wrap my head around it.’

He was now sitting on the floor, his head between his legs trying to cover his face. He then lifted his head and started to shake it slowly, his hands were on both sides of his face. You could see it in his eyes and the way he acted that he was suffering while remembering that night. He looked like he was trying to get away from that memory.

None of you made a noise while you were watching him, then Max broke the silence and said ‘Try us.’

Only then Eddie looked at all of you with confusion in his eyes. His brows were furrowed and he squinted his eyes ever so slightly. And after a few seconds of silence, he started to tell you the whole story. How Chrissy was in a complete trance and he tried everything in his power to wake her up from it but he failed. Then, he said that she started to slowly rise to the ceiling and float for a minute or so before her bones cracked with a sick sound and her eyes disappeared as if they were being pulled in.

You were having a hard time understanding everything he had just said. You were trying your best to not make him feel like he was a freak for telling these but how could any of it be possible? You then looked at the others and saw that they weren’t shocked or surprised at all. They had this understanding look in their eyes. You were more confused than ever.

When Eddie finished telling the whole story, he said ‘I left her there, I didn’t know what to do so I… I ran away.’ His gaze was still fixated on the floor, not being able to look at any of you. Then Dustin kneeled in front of him slowly, saying ‘You know how everyone says that Hawkins is cursed? Well, they’re not completely wrong…’

Dustin then turned his gaze towards you and said, ‘(Y/N) you’re also new to this so maybe it’ll be better for you to sit down while I explain what we’ve been going through for quite some time now.’ His eyes motioned you to sit next to Eddie so you did what he wanted you to do. He was trying to get you close to him and if the events that were happening around you recently weren’t this strange or tragic, you would’ve flashed him a grateful smile.

‘But before the story time, let’s get Eddie some snacks from the car. He must be SO hungry. Right, guys?’ Robin said abruptly. She was also trying to get you guys some alone time. You had sweet friends, didn’t you?

As the others left the shack, leaving you alone with Eddie, you slowly went your way next to him. You weren’t quite sure how to behave or what to do. You were shocked after what he told to the group and you were scared about what Dustin was going to tell to the both of you. Was Hawkins really cursed?

As you sat down and got into a comfortable position, you saw that Eddie’s hands were still shaking, it wasn’t as bad as when you first came to the shack but he was still terrified from all the things he had experienced the other day. He felt your eyes on him and tried to stop his hands from shaking but he couldn’t.

Now, he was trying to hide them and while he was doing it, he tried to put on a brave face, just like the way you had seen him all the time. But you could tell that he was hurting.

So in order to reassure him and stop him, you took his hands in yours. He was definitely not expecting that, neither did you. But in that flash of a moment, you did it. You took his hands in yours. He lifted his face and looked into your eyes, he was embarrassed about it. Embarrassed that he was being vulnerable.

‘uh.. Hi.’ You said shyly. It was as if like you were being aware of what you were doing at that time and blood started rushing to your cheeks, making them a brighter pink color that looked way too cute. He said ‘H- hi’ as well, putting on a small and genuine smile that made your heart skip a beat. You have never seen him like this before, he looked so fragile.

You were looking deeply into each others’ eyes when you broke the silence saying ‘Look, I know things have been more difficult than it should’ve been for you and I know that we don’t know each other very well but I wanted you to know that we are here for you.. That I’m here for you.’

‘(Y/N)..’ he said whispering while getting closer to you. He was looking at your lips now. ‘Thank you, means a lot but… Why are you tryna help me?’

You tried to look at his face but you got overwhelmed by how pretty he was looking. His bangs perfectly framing his face, his beautiful brown eyes piercing through yours, the feeling of cold metal on your fingers because of his rings; He was even prettier up close. You got to see a different side of him today and it drove you to him more.

You were looking at the ground, not being able to meet his gaze. ‘Because I.. I like you.’ You said. ‘I like you and it hurts me to see you this way. Like I said I know that we don’t know each other very well but-’

While you were talking, the coldness of metal from his rings on your palm was gone. Turns out he freed his left hand and he was now grabbing your chin to tilt your head. He forced you to look at him with a gentle touch. After a few seconds of staring at each others’ eyes, Eddie suddenly made a quick move and brought your face closer to his. Your eyes shut close, waiting for his next move. Then you felt his lips on yours, kissing you. It was a gentle and sweet one, as if he was afraid of hurting you if he acted too harsh.

You were so surprised you couldn’t do anything but to return the kiss. After a few seconds, he broke the kiss and looked at your face, observing you and your emotions.

‘I thought that butthead Henderson already told you about it.’ He said emphasizing the butthead part, rolling his eyes jokingly. He loved the kid but that didn’t mean that he was a butthead.

You chuckled a little at his expressions, feeling happy that he was acting like his usual self again. Seeing that you don’t have an answer, he continued to talk.

‘I.. I like you for quite some time now and I thought I made it pretty obvious. At least that’s what they told me during our D&D sessions.’

‘They made fun of me for not having the courage to talk to you but, I’m glad you did. I didn’t want you to be labeled as ‘the freak’s girlfriend’ or something.. Not that I care about what they call me but-’

‘I don’t care about it either Eddie, I like you a lot and nothing can change that.’

He had the cutest smile on his face after hearing you say those words. He looked relieved and happier now, despite the things that has been going on lately.

You were smiling too, probably like an idiot.

‘Robin tried to leave us alone, probably gotta thank her when its all done.’

‘Yeah well, don’t worry about it and let’s get back to where we were, shall we?’ He said, looking at your lips and back at your eyes again, looking for a sign of consent.

You shook your head slightly but eagerly, wanting to continue. His left hand found its way back to your chin, pulling you closer.

Your lips were almost touching when the door of the shack openned loudly. Dustin was the first person to walk inside. When he saw you guys in that position, his eyes went wide and he quickly tried to cover his eyes yelling ‘Oh MY GOD, OH MY GOD! CODE RED! …sorry guys.’ but at the same time he was smirking and he winked at you guys once with the biggest smile you have ever seen on his face.

You guys broke apart and Eddie got frustrated at how you guys got interrupted but it was no surprise, he thought to himself. Then, when he saw Dustin winking to the both of you, he turned to you and flashed an amused yet at the same time, confused smile. You told Henderson about it too and he didn’t tell Eddie a single word about it? He had some explaining to do to Eddie for later.

‘A total butthead indeed.’ you said in a whispering tone, sighing. Eddie turned to you and both of you chuckled. After a few seconds, the others rushed inside, Steve grabbed the oar once again and yelled:

‘CODE RED? WHAT HAPPENED HENDERSON, TALK TO ME’ He was looking around, swinging the oar, being the babysitter he was as usual.

When he and the others saw you sitting so close to Eddie, they understood what was going on and they all started to share a knowing smile.

‘So Dustin, Dustin, Dustin… You knew this fine lady had a crush on me too and you hid it from me all. this. time? …Amazing.’ He said with a low voice, eyes wide open. He was smiling but the smile wasn’t reaching his eyes.

‘Look Eddie I can explain, EDDIE-’ Dustin yelled when he saw Eddie starting to get off of the ground. He ran straight to the outside, knowing that Eddie can’t go out and risk getting caught. Eddie yelled ‘YOUUU SON OF A B-’ but everyone was laughing out loud at that point, even Eddie was having fun... You loved his smile. You really did.

***

Thank you so much for reading chapter one of the series!

If you like this part, let me know by liking, reblogging or even leaving a comment. All of it and feedbacks are appreciated.

Stay in tune for the next chapter <3

[daggersandarrows]

i’m having a lot of feelings about seeing more people of color on critical role. i have spent so long both consciously and subconsciously working to appear white. i was raised “white”, i was taught to conform in the exact same breath that i was taught to speak. (quite literally--spanish was not spoken around the house except as a secret; trini slang only comes out when my mother gets very emotionally heightened. i speak like a white person, because for me to learn spanish was for me to “reject the gifts of america”, and people can’t understand my mom unless she adopts her deliberate american accent).

i’ve spent so long learning that this was the only way to acceptance; you pretend to be the same, you take every single microagrression, every single “of course it was two black girls ‘working’ when i got there, standing around and talking no doubt”, every stranger putting a hand in your hair, every “jesus, speak english”, and you pretend you don’t see it, you don’t hear it, you don’t feel it.

you pretend you approve. and that’s the only way to stay safe. that’s the only way to move up in the world. “sticks and stones” was repeated so often in my household that we only needed to hear the first three words to know what mom meant. “sticks and stones”. you’re getting too worked up about racism again, remember, just pretend you’re fine and you will be.

you are invisible, you are fine.

i consume content made only by white people because why would i consume anything else? if my goal is to blend in perfectly why would i look for stories that speak to me about the part of me that i’m doing my damndest to hide?

i made the mistake of stumbling into creators who love themselves enough not to hide. i felt almost betrayed, watching aabria dm for exu. no one ever told me it was possible to sink your teeth into that kind of gentrification-critical worldbuilding, to say it with your whole chest, and not...immediately get ostracized by all your white friends?

(to be clear: i know matt’s doing something very similar in c3, and that’s great. but it is inherently different to say that kind of thing without fear when you’re a poc.)

it’s nothing huge or obvious, but the unapologetic claim that the cast holds on their identity is simply indescribably touching to me. when i was a kid i badly wanted to be “a punk”, and in my mind this was obviously just a white person thing--how could it have been anything else? it was all i saw. super pale skin and stick straight hair was a requirement. so i tried to make myself whiter. staying inside in the summer and spending hours straightening and damaging my hair. i squashed myself into this ill fitting box because it never occurred to me that i could be both black and punk.

and that sort of continued as i got older. cosplays were all model-esque white people. how could i be both hispanic and a cosplayer? how could i be (someone who rode horses, liked video games, was a nerd, a theater kid, hell, someone who fucking enjoyed themself in any way outside of the very specific stereotypes i was given to act out)?

to see aabria dming, playing a high powered and highly emotional woman, mica’s cosplays and her riding adventures--mica playing a literal angel (black angels, guys! how many black angels have you seen outside of the past five years?), aimee playing a character with questionable morals and cool hair, khary playing a disabled character who also somehow just gives off raw sex appeal?, robbie playing a socially awkward, soft, affectionate guy with an appreciation for fancier stuff, erika’s gender fluidity and sheer enthusiasm for everything (getting too excited wasn’t cool, it was too “white”, an actual thing my mother said to me--i know, double standard), anjali’s mixed affection and exasperation as a sibling figure, and more recently lou and luis...i didn’t have this stuff as a kid. i wasn’t allowed to see myself as anything but one dimensional, so i had to alter myself to either fit that one dimension, or pretend to be who i wasn’t so people would accept that i had more than 2-3 emotions and character traits.

i wasn’t aware that it was possible, to be any of this without flattening myself. i wasn’t aware that there were white people out there who wouldn’t immediately hate you for unapologetically existing in their space without squashing yourself into their box.