#i wrote a character that i want people to get attached to. and then i got attached to them ahhhhHHH :(((

[arthur-r]

(stupid vent in the tags i’m maybe struggling a lot. not feeling particularly real or handling my life and relationships maturely at all)

[rahabs]

I'm forcefully removing these historical characters from your grasp until you learn to distinguish fictional representations of historical figures in a television show from the real historical figures.

[hivepixels]

[tiyoin]

imagine how lowkey boring it is at nrc?

like yes teenage boys are their own form of entertainment, but no drama?? no gossip??

having no girls there would be awful because where’d all the gossip go? all the petty drama?? the groups of girls who’d leave all at once to go to the bathroom? the relief you would get whenever you were in a room full with guys and then hearing a girl’s voice would no longer happen.

the days of a girl walking up to talk to you just because.

the friendships are so much different too, not just because they’re from a different world, have magic and are guys, but because there’s no crutch.

there’s no familiarity all the guys have. no longer can you laugh about being around another girl so long you guys have synched, no more sly glances whenever a cute guy passes- no more talking about cute guys period.

no more bonding with other girls over outfits or accessories or how annoying deodorant is. no laughing at horrible joke only you two would get- the guys would just give you a strange look or call you stupid.

no one to call up whenever your bored- ace and deuce and the rest of the first years are great, but… it’s not the same.

of course you missed your freedom of driving around, blasting music with your fruity little drinks. or going house shopping together, driving through neighborhoods as you muse about the future life you want to live.

conversations are bit… more boring now that you’re on your own….

no more cuddling just because you were lonely and needed a friend, no more inside jokes that only you two girls would get, no more having someone attached to your hip without people making it weird.

being friends with guys is great! no real need for dramatics or petty gossip. no having to worry about anyone sleeping with a someone’s boyfriend. or about the incest-uist friend groups that would form.

but… you missed other girls.. the solidarity, the support and the comfort…

never thought i’d have to write this about a post.

you all can have your different experiences, but don’t shit on me and the people who relate to this. do not come into my comments and spread negativity because it’s not wanted nor necessary.

this relates to me so i wrote it. i thought about how my life in twisted wonderland would be and how my interpersonal relationships today will effect it / an oc character. it’s not an evil post if you guys can’t relate or if find my perspective different from your own.

you’re always welcome to share your experiences or how you relate differently to it and that’s completely fine, i even welcome it. because having more than one perspective is always welcomed.

if you’re taking my word as canon/ gospel and are therefore angry, then stop. these aren’t even headcanons, it’s just an ‘imagine’ post.

they characters wine pick you, they won’t give you a kiss because they’re proud of you defending you- THEY’RE DUCKING CHARACTERS IN A JAPANESE MOBILE GAME.

just tell everyone in the comments ‘i have internalized misogyny and can’t handle seeing girls have fun because i couldn’t have fun with girls. and vil is different, he’s not like other guys *hair tuck*’

[aficionadoenthusiast]

*me, with tears of frustration in my eyes* rick didn't include annabeth's crush on luke or luke's pseudo-crush on annabeth for no reason! it is not something that needs to be cut because it's 'gross'! it serves thematic purpose! it adds to characterization! guys! please!

annabeth is twelve, and luke is the guy she's looked up to since she was seven. she not only has that bond, but she has the admiration from him getting his own quest. she has a lot of hero worship going for him, and it's really not unreasonable that she would like him or even that she would think of him as more than a sibling. beyond that, it's a great example of how a person who has never received real, unconditional love can become unhealthily attached to someone who is not good for them just because they've been shown a modicum of respect. if you want to look at it from a percabeth perspective, it could even tie into how her character has to learn the difference between love and kindness from a place of love and respect (i.e. percy) vs love and kindness from a place of obligation and manipulation (i.e. luke as kronos' vessel)

on luke's side, especially with him calling her his little sister now (in the show) and him literally turning into kronos later, it's symbolism for how he's being pulled farther and farther onto the dark side. as kronos takes over his body, he sees her less and less as a sister and more and more of something else, something that would be considered dark and unhealthy by anyone not on the dark side (for good reason), until eventually she has to remind him of their years on the run when he considered her a sister: "Family, Luke. You promised."

you're supposed to be grossed out by it! that means the theme is working!

you're supposed to see a traumatized 12 year old with a crush on her 19 year old mentor and think, "hey, that's weird! i wonder if her not getting any love or attention until she met him plays a role in their relationship?" and eventually see a 24 year old get a villain-induced crush on a 16 year old and think, "hey, that's really weird! i wonder if his turn to the dark side and how that turn happened twisted his view of her?" and ultimately think, "i wonder what that says about the type of trauma that develops in kids who grew up thinking they were unloved, especially since the author specifically wrote the book for his son with disabilities, the author who used to be a teacher, a profession that regularly encounters kids that are actively being abused and neglected?"

anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk

edit: this post is not speculation! i'm not trying to say i don't think they're going to include annabeth's crush! i am perfectly aware that we are only two episodes in! this post is in response the people i keep seeing say they're glad because they think Luke's little sister comment means they're not going to include the "gross stuff from the books" (other's wording, not mine), and I was trying to explain why including it would be a positive. sorry, i really thought i made that clear

[sundrop-writes]

Hiii !! I wanted to request a reaction for Derek, Emily and Spencer

When Single Parent! Reader (GN is fine !!) has to bring their daughter to the BAU for a little bit and she won't stop following the Character around and doesn't want to leave "her new friend" when its time to go? Thank you sm in advance if you write it !! 💕💕

i might swing by later with a dif request, this was the first thing my sleep ridden brain blessed me with ;p

I love this so much (I have been in such a parent fic mood since writing the Dad Spence fic, Star thank you so much) - I think this idea is so adorable, I love it!!!

(I wrote Derek's part and then trailed off and left this in my drafts for a few days, so sorry if there's a huge disconnect between the characters' parts. Ooops.)

Requests are currently - OPEN

How would Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss, and Spencer Reid react to your daughter becoming attached to them? (Derek, Emily, and Spencer x GN!Reader)

Warnings: mentions of corporate/white collar crimes (embezzlement, etc.); mentions of the reader being threatened by white collar criminals, mentions of criminals threatening to kill a child; as it says in the title, the reader has a daughter but the reader's gender is not described in any way; surprisingly, for this one, I didn't give the daughter a name. idk, I think that's it. (Edit: now fixed so that the reader is actually fully GN and I am so sorry about the mistake before!!!)

It was a pretty basic case. You were an attorney working on a large company merger - you had found evidence of millions of dollars being embezzled, and when you had copied the files with the intention of bringing them to the IRS, you had started receiving threatening letters. It weighed on your conscience - you knew that the men who ran the company had more than enough money and resources to make you disappear, likely leaving your daughter an orphan, leaving her to wonder what had happened to you for the rest of her life. When you received another letter with photos of your daughter at her preschool attached, now threatening her - you had made your decision fully.

You took your files and evidence to the BAU - you had met Rossi at a seminar he gave, talking about how sociopathy is incredibly common in corporate circles - how sociopaths do very well in corporate jobs due to their driven, goal oriented, emotionless nature. And warning signs to look out for if someone is using those traits to cross into dangerous territory. It was a seminar you had gone to out of curiosity, but you were glad that you had taken his card and you were able to contact him now.

He invited you to the BAU, and the team offered to take your case - to find out who was threatening you and bring them to justice.

Derek found you incredibly beautiful.

He was intrigued by your looks at first, and when Hotch mentioned that someone needed to interview you and get the full details from you in order for the team to get a better perspective on the case, Derek volunteered immediately. He hadn't gotten a full briefing - too eager to get to talk to you.

He came into the room with a bottle of water for you, looking to comfort you with his smile and his charms, and he was surprised when Penelope came back into the room and a small girl came barreling toward you, incredibly excited to tell you that she had gotten M&Ms from the vending machine (which Penelope had taken her to).

Typically, Derek didn't go for people who had kids. Any other time, with any other person - it would have immediately turned him off. It would have dampened your attractiveness in his eyes. He generally had a 'no single parents' policy, because he thought that dating someone with kids was just a lot of baggage. But seeing you - he was immediately taken with you. And seeing you with your daughter, somehow made you instantly more attractive.

And he thought the way that you scooped your daughter up into your lap and let her feed you M&Ms with her chubby little fingers was all too cute. It was unprofessional, but the case definitely wasn't the only thing on his mind that day.

Penelope took your daughter out of the room again while Derek interviewed you, and it was only when you spoke of the fear you felt for your daughter - the potential of her being her by the anonymous person, that you actually teared up. Derek couldn't help but to pull you in close, holding you tight in an effort to comfort you (secretly loving how tightly you hugged him back) - and it was in that moment that he vowed to himself that he would do whatever it took to protect you and your child. He would always keep the two of you out of harm's way.

And he certainly tried his hardest to accommodate your daughter when he found out that the two of you would be sticking around the office for the day - to ensure that you would be protected until the team found out who had sent the threats. He got her a kids meal with a toy when he ordered lunch, he knew there wasn't much in the office in the way of "toys" - but he swung by Garcia's office borrowed something she had that was fuzzy and lights up (with the promise of returning it) and he scrounged up a blank pad of paper and some coloured pens so your daughter could have something to do.

It wasn't surprising when she excitedly ran over to his desk and gave him a picture she had drawn of him - a very cartoonish muscled man with his same facial hair and an eggish bald head. His exaggerated features in the picture made you and Morgan laugh, and before you left the BAU for the day (when your safety was assured and the local police were on their way to arrest the men who had made the threats to you) - you found a different pen and wrote your number on the bottom corner of the picture for him.

He knew that something in you had changed him when he started thinking about taking you on a first date in the park - something your daughter could enjoy as well, rather than considering what bar or late night restaurant he was going to take you to.

Emily was surprised by the entire thing.

She hadn't been around children since, well - she was one. Due to events in her past, and due to the way her mother treated her, she never imagined herself being a parent. Ever. She was someone who thought that she was just naturally terrible with kids, like her own mom was. She hadn't met the person she thought that she could settle down with, so she never thought that kids were in the cards for her. So it definitely caught her off guard when your daughter seemed to take to her like a duck to water.

It was in her natural instinct to comfort you. You were so shaken up about the whole thing, the anonymous danger lurking in your life - and she took some extra time to assure you that things were going to be okay, that the team was the best, and they were going to catch whoever was doing this.

She thought it was a natural kindness to get down on your daughter's level and ask what she was playing with, to compliment her cute little doll and then take her down the hallway to grab a snack to give you a few minutes to breathe. The little girl was sweet and Emily didn't mind spending some extra time with her.

On their way back along, your daughter plucked a crossword puzzle book off Emily's desk and asked what it was, and Emily explained it - so then she took a few minutes to find some crosswords for children online and printed them out, and when she came to delivery them, alone with some pens, your daughter enthusiastically asked if Emily would sit and 'show her' - and while you said that Emily was busy and had other work to do, Emily shrugged and said she had a few minutes to spare. Again, she thought it was common manners, sitting with the girl on her lap while she guided her through the puzzles, praising her intellect when she got the answers right.

She didn't see the way you were looking at the pair, pure affection bubbling up in your eyes.

When the day was over, and it was cleared as safe for you and your daughter to return home, the little girl let out a loud complaint that she didn't want to leave her 'new friend Emily' - and Emily couldn't have predicted the way that those words tugged at something in her chest. She didn't know what led her to kneeling down at the girl's level, promising to see her that weekend when she had a free day - that was, if you didn't mind. Getting nothing but a bright smile from you, and feeling a certain spark there.

(She had to resist the urge to punch Morgan in the ribs when she walked back to her desk to nothing but teasing, how she was getting 'the whole family package' on 'her first date'.)

Spencer found the whole thing (secretly) adorable.

It is no secret that Spencer loves kids. He is very good with kids, and it's clear by the way he acts around kids that he definitely wants kids of his own someday. He hasn't met 'the one' yet - the person that he's going to have kids with. Whether that's through the natural, old-fashioned way or through adoption. But he did always imagine that if he raised kids of his own, it would be from infancy.

He never imagined that the person he was meant to be with would stumble into his life with a child that was already walking and talking - but when he met you and your daughter, it felt so right. Even if the circumstances were a bit dark.

He interviewed you about the whole situation, and when you apologized for crying and getting emotional, he was quick to assure you that it was natural - you were shaking, and though Spencer was usually someone to avoid touch, he found his need to hold you so overwhelming. He didn't regret his choice to wrap his arms around you when you hugged him back tightly.

When your daughter burst into the room (no longer occupied making paper airplanes with Emily and JJ), she was quick to ask why you were crying, extending out a small chubby finger to point at you, seemingly warbling with half-baked tears of her own at seeing you so upset. Spencer knelt down and assured her that everything was going to be okay, and then he moved to distract her by taking the little paper airplane out of her hand and telling her that he knew a trick to make it fly so much farther.

And he did. It was simple aerodynamics and folding techniques. And then they stood near the top of the bullpen, silently trying to get Morgan to look up by flying planes onto his desk - and the man couldn't bring himself to get too mad when he heard childish giggling coming from your daughter every few minutes.

You truly felt those butterflies for Spencer turn into more when he showed your daughter a trick that ended with a fake flower somehow coming out of his sleeve - something feathery and pink that he tucked behind her ear for her to keep, having her smiling and laughing brightly on a day where you had been wracked with worry, fearing for her life.

By the time the day was over and both of your safety was assured, you weren't surprised that she didn't want to leave him. And you made the bold move, telling him (rather than asking him) - that he should come over for dinner and a movie on Saturday, and then leaning over to gently whisper in his ear that the two of you could enjoy a another, more adult flick after your daughter was tucked into bed. Your daughter was too excited at the prospect of seeing Spencer again, tugging on his pant leg, waiting for him to agree - and he was speechless at the implications of what you had said.

He couldn't even think of the word 'no' if he tried.

So, it was a date, then.

Criminal Minds Masterlist

[m1ndbrand]

"and all it took was..." — Prize

WARNINGS: Slight!NSFW it's suggestive I would say 18+; Coriolanus Snow is it's own warning(Snow after the 10thGames, 2 years after to be precise); slight dub-con; mentions of physical assault; a small mental breakdown in the beginning; Reader is also not "normal"; This is after the Reader's Hunger Games, she was 18 when chosen, she is 19 now(the same age Lucy Gray would be/is);

SUMMARY: The 12th Hunger Games winner unfortunately fortunately gets the attention of President Snow.

WORDS: 2.079

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the franchise The Hunger Games characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them. I do claim what i wrote and only that.

DIVIDERS BY: @cafekitsune (Thank you so much, all your work is lovely!)

A/N: I wasn't really going to publish this but as I finish it I just thought, hell, why not? So here it is, I apologize for any errors or mistakes and/or writing, English is not my first language and I usually don't write I just read really.

MASTERLIST

“ease a little—” the feminine voice pleaded almost, her voice strained. He only tightened his grip, burying his face deeper into the warmth of her skin. She stills a breath, waiting for something sharp and painful, a slap against her cheek for her words.

It doesn’t come.

No words, no warning bark, and not a bite felt in her skin. He just grabbed her tighter.

She hated him, she reminds herself when a small bud of sympathy begins to form for him. She hated him.

But he wanted her…for some reason she could not fathom, needed someone, and she always wished to feel wanted. Wanted by her family even if she was born a girl and not a boy like they so ardently wished, wanted as a friend, a lover, someone…anything— wanted. Just wanted. She craved that her whole life. Hungered for it.

And this is all he wants from her, stay with him, let him hold her, even if he is the vile man she knows he is, he wants…no he needs her, she understands as his grip trembles as her hands move again to try and move his away from her. She had never seen him like this.

A sick satisfaction settles inside her being against her better judgment, her heart beating faster as he cries against her flushed skin, fuck he really was that attacked already? She sighs and lets her head fall against the too-soft pillow, her body relaxing against his grip, letting the snake smother her.

Was this dangerous…? Yes well— he did kill people, one was the person he loved, that he was attached to…but she needed him too. She needed his attachment, his feelings even if twisted ones to survive, to get back home… Will he let her though? The thoughts ring in her head like a bright red warning light, would he let her get out of his arms and sight?

The cold softness of the inside of her hand touches his warm and slightly wet cheek, mumbling the nickname she knows he will answer to. Coryo.

He beams. Bless him, he actually beamed to her, eyes glazed as he looked for whatever she would be saying before she even said it.

Protect my family. They need money, food—

She wanted to say, but she knew his mistrustful self would see this as her trying to manipulate him, which she was, for the benefit of her family.

So before those words come out, she swallows them, and she kisses his cheek to disperse any emotions he could read in her face that would indicate any of her thoughts. It was short and sweet, and she could feel her cheeks flushing slightly as the shame settled inside her. She never thought she would need to do this to survive— any act of caring as soft and simple as this was, she thought of only brutal killing and lies, and manipulation would be in her way to survive inside the Arena. Inside the Capitol, the games she was unlucky enough to get dragged to.

What she hated the most was that the red in her cheeks was not only from the shame of her actions but also because the kiss was close to his mouth, the corner of his lips to be exact. And his lips were soft against hers, warm. Someone with the name Snow shouldn’t have to be so fucking warm.

He turns to stone for a split second, calculating her actions and why she did them, she thinks with dread growing in the pit of her stomach. Maybe he had seen behind her façade and would kill her right away— suddenly he lunges at her, his hands grabbing her jaw and neck like he is about to smash his forehead against her head violently and aggressively, maybe breaking her skull against the white wall behind the bed painting them red with her soft and red insides…but he kisses her. His thumb goes to her cheek, feeling up and then pressing the line where her teeth would be closed, and he makes her mouth slightly open for him. It easily opens with how caught off guard she was.

It’s like he is breathing her in through his mouth for a second before he devours her.

Oh. Oh. This was happening. Really happening.

After some seconds, she tries to at least mimic him, his tongue licks the top of her mouth and she tries to push his tongue against hers instead, her hands going to grip his shirt for some stability. She didn’t know how to act now, she was losing her advantage, her calm and collected self, and he was slowly peeling off her armour.

His hand caresses her neck, and she shivers, he is sure to notice this as he gives a breathy laugh against her mouth, and she flushes more. Did he know she was inexperienced? Was he mocking her? Her shame-filled mind didn’t let her finish her train of thought as he continued with his advances. His other hand takes this chance to feel her up better, pushing against the softness of her chest and her heartbeat goes faster, her eyes wider. Were they…? No, he wouldn't— He closes his hand around her breast, a groan of his going straight to her core and she trembles. No no no she can’t feel like this, not with him. Her racing mind makes her grip his shoulder, and her other hand pushes his chest a little, making him stop his actions altogether. He looks down at her with half-lidded eyes, his breathing fixing with hers.

“What’s wrong?” He says with a slightly raspier voice, his hand resting on her hip bone, finger instinctively drawing circled in her skin trying to soothe her and she hated it because it helped. She was wide-eyed with flushed skin and trembling body, her look deeply satisfying him, but of course, he wasn’t going to say anything that could make her run away from him like a scared small animal.

“Well— aren’t we…” She thinks over her words, “going too fast?” He arches an eyebrow at his, amusement dancing in his face, “You want to stop?” He looks into her eyes and then down at her trembling body, the hand resting on her neck moving down to hoover around her breast. “You seem,” He pauses a little, like he is tasting the words “very responsive” Her gaze looks at where he is looking and if she wasn’t flustered now she is, her nipples visible against her thin shirt, dammed chic and thin Capitol clothes that can even show the slight curve of bones and prickled flesh.

“…this is— a normal bodily reaction, nothing more” she mutters quickly, sniffing as her gaze looks away from him, she heard him hum and his warmth again in the softness of her skin, her hardened bud being once again teased with his thumb. She feels herself move at the sudden contact, her eyes going to him.

“There you go, no looking away— Victor” He drops his face closer to her chest, his warm breath hitting her clothed flesh, and she stirs a breath at the picture. His slick hair perfectly placed as his mouth rounds the plush of her breast, lips slightly glistening with both of their saliva mixed together. She gulps a noise that threatens to come out and as she feels his tongue roll against her bud, her hand goes to his hair, trying to pull his away from her too sensitive skin.

His hands go to the end of her shirt and pull it up, making a temporary barrier for her hands so he can mouth her again, this time as his wet muscle makes contact with her nipple a breathy gasp escapes her mouth. Her hand puts the thin shirt out of her vision, his hand already taking care of the other bud of nerves, and her hand goes once again to his hair. As she slightly pulls it he groans, biting her and groaning a warning, not enough to inflict pain but enough to get a whine out of her throat.

“Shit—” Her hand eases on his hair, only pulling him against her as he takes his mouth away from her nipple, going to the other. He mouths against her with a moan and her thighs close together, he must have noticed this because one hand moves to her thighs, getting his hand between them.

“We aren’t stopping,” He groaned as the inside of his hand palms her through her panties, wet from arousal “fuck…” Her eyes shot to his, shocked to hear someone so collected with his words curse “so wet already” She was sure she could hear a smirk in his words, but he was moving his lips against her skin, his face hidden as he kept her trembling with his mouth and hands. He was meticulous with this like he had all of this planned, her mind didn’t let her think much however, analyse what was happening, her eyes focusing on his pale and shiny hair and moving down and down on her.

“I can’t stay,” She says with a tremble to her voice as she feels his hardened length against her thigh, her voice trembling as she feels the hardness much bigger and thicker than she anticipated. “I will be going back to my District—” Her heart was fast like she was running in the Arena again. This was something she knew if they continued, he wouldn’t let her go, she could see it in his eyes. She wanted to belong, to be part of yes, but the way he looked at her was like…she was a part of himself, like something that was already his and it scared her. It scared her thinking of losing the little freedom she had, the little freedom any District person had. It scared her to not being able to see her family. But what scared her more than anything was that thinking about it, actually putting her mind to it, she didn’t mind it much.

It scared her, she didn’t mind being owned if this was going to be her life. She wouldn’t starve, she didn’t need to provide for her family, he would take care of them. Taking care of everything that it was her responsibility her whole life. She quickly understood that…

Being owed would be much easier than being free.

And even if the idea was fucked up, and she knew it was, it was still the truth. She was scared about this kind of relationship, not of him she knew he wouldn’t hurt her(right?) but how far he would…well, go for anything if needed.

His hand gripped her thighs as his chin rested on one of her knees, his piercing blue eyes looking up at her with amusement.

“We both know you already made up your mind,” His blunt nails pressed against her skin, surely marking her with crescent moons.

“The moment I got to read your file, actually see you…I knew you were meant to be mine” That was…before the games were even over? Before the games themselves started. Her eyebrows furrow down at him, and he gives her a half smile, “How popular were you during the games, do you remember?” He mumbles as his hands rest on the mattress under her, on the side of her hips. “Not very, you didn’t perform, didn’t talk much.” He continues with his words as he slowly comes up to her face like a predator closing on their prey. “You kept to yourself to strike and kill fast— not doing alliances…”

“How do you think you got water from sponsors? The medicine and…your well-beloved and helpful small knife?” A chill runs down her spine as she looks at him with new information given to her “The knife was the most expensive thing since it was actually ‘illegal’ to send the tributes something something like that” His lips touch hers again and his knee goes between her legs, spreading them apart and getting them between him. “Did you know that?” He muses with calculating eyes, the mental breakdown he had was long forgotten like it never happened and Snow was looking at her, his prize.

“Now,” His eyes darken with still hidden information he has yet to give. “won’t you thank your sponsor?” He breathes against her lips with his eyes looking straight at her, his knee rubbing her clothed sex.

Next

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

This is a fandom related thing. I will say that right off the bat, but I needed a few extra opinions on this since it feels like I am alone on this.

AITA for killing off my OC in a group rp?

For some context, I (using the name Snow for myself) joined a group rp with some other people where we would come up with a plot together. Everyone would be using original characters (OCs) It was agreed that the things that happened would be voted on, but people were not allowed to control what other people did with their OCs. It is the whole "my oc, my rules" thing. For those who don't get it, it basically means that since the oc is yours, only you get to decide what happens to them.

To the story. I had plans I wanted to do with my OC. I wrote her to be someone who was secretly working for the villains and was only tricking the others into thinking she was their friend. The only other people who were aware of this were the moderators, and they had approved of it.

What was the problem then you may be wondering? Well the problem was that another member, I'll just call them Star, had said that they had gotten an emotional attachment to my OC. Which I personally found weird, so I typically tried not to be stuck alone with them.

When it came to reveal the plot twist with my oc, Star had a freak out upon finding out. They started crying and complaining that it wasn't right to do that and they could not picture "their" emotional support character doing that. The other members decided to comfort Star. They always sided with Star and acted like they were oh so special. The others were saying that this was all just a joke and that it wasn't actually going to happen. "It is just a joke right, Snow?" they had said.

And I replied with. "No. It's not a joke. My oc has been working with the villains the whole time."

Star's response was to have a meltdown over it, saying that I was out to hurt them and ruin their day. So I ended up getting a message from the moderators asking me to change my OC's backstory as to not upset Star further. They ended up telling Star that it would be changed to just having my OC be mind controlled the whole time.

This was not something I agreed with, but I pretended to play along begrudgingly. I hated that the group decided to treat my OC like she belonged to Star. But I played along and came up with my own idea. There was a plot point that came up in the rp that would have someone die off, so I took it as my opportunity to kill off my own OC. If I wasn't allowed to do what I had planned for her initially, then she wasn't going to stick around anymore.

After I killed her off, Star logged off and vanished for an entire 3 days. All the other members constantly messaged them to try and get a response from her, but they did not answer until they returned. When they logged on, they said that they had to a panic attack over what had happened and felt hurt that I would do that.

I just responded with "my oc, my rules. I quit this group." Then I quickly went through and deleted every little bit of information I had shared about my OC with that group before leaving their discord. After, I got a lot of messages from all the members, about sending the information so that Star could continue playing with my OC since she was their comfort character and it wasn't fair I was doing this to them especially after their panic attack. I said no and blocked everyone who had asked me that.

Sure I feel bad that they had a panic attack, but I felt betrayed that everyone else was willing to bend the rules for them and allow them to control my OC. Even if I no longer use said OC, I still wouldn't let them have her. This is still my property and I stand by the "my oc, my rules" thing.

So AITA for killing off my OC?

What are these acronyms?

[shimishimii]

everybody’s falling in love but me

⟿ wc; 2k+

⟿ Sakusa Kiyoomi x gn reader ; dramatic fluff, for me this is really a cute fic, hope you like it

⟿ have you ever felt like everyone’s been experiencing love and relationships as if it was a trend and you’re getting left behind? I wrote this fic because of that

He hears another rant from Atsumu. Hinata rushes to guess, and Sakusa doesn’t need to listen further to determine what this is all about.

Love. Again.

How long did Atsumu’s previous partner lasted? Two weeks? 6 days? A night?

He sat at the gym floor and sees Bokuto smiling cheekily despite his girlfriend coming over to scold him for overexerting given his shoulder injury. Hinata is on a call with Kageyama, grinning and jumping, as if practice was not tiring enough.

He passes on Atsumu’s request, heavily declining to stay up until midnight taking care of wobbly legs and liquor drowned cognition. And for a well-built set of athletes, it sure is a heavy work.

Besides, the topic will be the same. Atsumu vents, hogs all the drama, Bokuto and Hinata would comfort him while Meian tries to give a man-to-man advice. And when the night breeze grows heavy and their hazy eyes starts to cloud with brimming tears with a weird mixture of laughter, only tales of love would escape their lips.

Sakusa shakes his head and hurries packing up knowing the blonde setter would drag everyone out for a drink. And no matter what kind of opinion he says, his teammates would point out his own demise. Right, he is not even in a relationship.

All his friends seem to feel warm and giddy talking about the important people in their life. Sure, their partners had flaws, but all those details seem to fit the puzzle. Drawn back by time again and again, as if tethered by invisible threads of affinity, through complains and smiles, they keep coming back.

Like it was meant to be.

Even if it meant his heart would always be at the edge of heaven and hell all the time?

He likes his comfort zone as it is even if it means he is alone. Alone but not lonely, well, most of the time.

Sakusa can’t fathom the idea of how they can be willing to gamble on the table, hoping that their partner would show a card of heart.

Of all computed probabilities, love must be a question of chance.

Dumb luck. Fate. Destiny.

Whatever it is, his walls are tall enough for love to even take a peek.

Sometimes, confusion spreads over him, was he being left out? Is his heart just half a piece and there’s actually a need for someone to complete it?

Actually, he never liked putting much effort in liking someone. Simply, the time and attention to spend, he thinks it is not worth it.

He assumes several points, mostly illogical, but he thinks otherwise.

First, to get used to someone’s warmth and the eternal winter that would follow once it’s gone. Second, he doesn't want to be a memory in someone's past, archived and forgotten as though once upon a time, he was just a side character in a story.

Lastly, but of course you will never hear him admit it.

He feels scared. Once he ends up alone, back to how he always was, he does not know how to cope with such loss.

With that, he prefers not feeling anything, getting attached, or falling in love at all.

There’s the constant fear of being left alone and hurt. For a heart to get used to a rhythm and then long a melody of what your heartbeat used to dance to.

But of course, he knows it is more complicated than that. And it was never easy admitting it. It’s hard to express this feeling. Of hoping to love and be loved, at the same time still enjoying the peace of solitude.

It seems to be an ignorant bliss, when you don’t know love drawn along the lines of commitment. Sure, he can admire someone but not in a way there’ll be a ring on his finger someday and vows will be exchanged.

His feelings were often intellectualized, and the words just never materialize.

There’s another fear that lingers, that admitting his feelings means a promise. That he will never leave them too.

What if his feelings change along the way?

He admires the concept of affection and intimacy but not when it is about someone’s name to be carved in his heart.

It seems fun. No, fun is not the word for it. It’s difficult to describe, but loving and being loved must be something special.

‘Who am I to find joy in such experience?’ He often asks himself.

So, he will simply think about this for a few nights, or days, or during showers, in-between tv shows, just enough to acknowledge this feeling and let it go.

See, there’s a lot of issues he is still working on. And may it be a decade or a century, he wishes to be well prepared before he falls in love.

Because he knows when he falls, it will be like gravity had him on a chokehold.

“You’re meeting again?” Bokuto asks. Suddenly, everyone’s attention is on him.

It’s an early end for their practice today. It barely warmed him up. Although Sakusa protests, he plays anyway. He grumbles but still plays volleyball all too well. Hinata complains how he can hate and love a thing, and still be good at it.

“Right Omi, I wonder why’s that” Atsumu sneaks a remark, with a hand placed on his shoulder, eyebrows wiggling. His teammates are too good at jumping, often at conclusions.

“It’s for that case settlement” Sakusa replies.

“The house ownership?” Everyone pauses to listen as Atsumu speaks. “Wonder how someone did manage to scam you” Atsumu’s right. He thinks of himself as ahead of analyzing people, turns out he’s vulnerable when someone offers something with the label ‘sale’.

“Why not let it go? You’re rich, unless you want to keep going on those ‘case meetings’ huh”

Sakusa simply sighs. The scammer was caught months ago, but there wasn’t any progress on who gets the house. Sakusa Kiyoomi, who finally decided to buy a house, somehow ended up tangled with you.

Both of you paid the full amount for the house, caught off guard by the ‘sale’. Said it was 50% off (it never was). Truly, the scammer knows capitalism by its roots, selling the house to both Sakusa and you, presented as a bargain but gained twice the amount. And unfortunately, the money was gone in thin air. The positive side was, it was named after you and Sakusa but both of you have to decide how to settle the ownership.

The judge suggested two options:

a) one gets the house, the other compensated with money

b) sell the house, both gets compensated with money

However, both of you refuses to give away the house. It’s a perfect deal, both near your workplaces, spacious, newly renovated, completely furnished, and has that perfect aesthetic of the interior you both dreamed of.

Sakusa already told this dilemma to his teammates. He has no choice, it’s been months, and both of you kept meeting but ends up arguing. No wins, no losses. A perfect stagnant problem.

“Let Kiyoomi enjoy his dates—”

“It’s a meeting” Sakusa retorts.

“Right, and the sun’s a star” Atsumu rolls his eyes.

“It’s a star?” Hinata quickly replies, with furrowed brows.

“Well, whatever you call it, seems like you’re enjoying anyways” Atsumu shrugs. Bokuto and Hinata nods.

“They’re annoying at best” Sakusa replies, massaging his forehead thinking what chaos it will be again later.

“If you don’t like each other so much, why bother meet all the time?” Hinata asks.

“Specifically, at least twice a week” Bokuto agrees.

And Sakusa’s left defenseless. His walls came crashing down.

He ignores everything they say after, as he usually does. He finishes packing up and proceeds to check your message. He searches the location where your date will be—discussion, he smiles at his silly mistake.

On the other hand, you are getting uneasy how today will turn out although you are sure an argument will be present. It’s quite a joke you kept meeting someone despite your desire to avoid things that are a waste of time.

Meeting Sakusa is not a waste of time, isn’t it?

You deny the excitement building up waiting on him as he shows up in gym clothes compared to your academia themed outfit. It was like someone on a fitness journey was meeting up with a crumbling postgrad student.

With black sweatpants, an inch higher than his ankle, and his regular fitted black shirt, you spot Kiyoomi. As marvelous and nonchalant as ever.

Kiyoomi looks from outside the cafe’s window and pauses for almost a minute, thinking of something nice to say.

You also prepared a few phrases on your mind, something about the weather. How cloudy skies compliments the hue of his hair and eyes, captivating his features so well.

But the moment you meet, and words come out from your mouths, he was baffled how something about the weather turned into an argument about ecological footprints. Maybe because Kiyoomi kept on using his car despite the training venue being streets away. You point it out and Kiyoomi would never admit his purpose of hoping to drive you home sometime. So, he contradicts your words by the number of items you kept on purchasing and why consumerism keeps on depleting the earth’s resources.

After some lengthy banter, silence precedes.

But Sakusa wonders what remains loud, no one’s talking but something remains loud.

Then he realizes, there’s the beat on his chest.

He begins to get baffled by how many paradoxes can exist all at once.

Like how he can hate your guts but keeps making his days available just to see you.

How can he be so selfish of not wanting to give up the house just so he can hear you ramble about your life, why it was your dream house, how can it benefit your working hours, and how you hate pets are not allowed in your current apartment complex.

He hates this. How his practice tires him out but ends up coming back to meet you. Like it was meant to be.

You could also list your reasons to hate him.

You hate how he becomes silent suddenly. But his nonverbal gestures tell a lot and more than what you need to know. Like how his lips slowly lift when your reasoning was actually right. Or the way he orders for the both of you and never misses any detail, he gets it right without even asking you. Even the way he leans forward slightly just so he can hear you clearly and remind you he is listening whenever you share anything.

You begin to remind yourself, think with your head not that thing in your chest.

Of all computed probabilities, love may not be a question of chance…but a choice.

Dumb luck. Fate. Destiny.

Whatever it was, he might be slowly getting it.

You are not there to complete him. Neither he does. But simply sitting in front of him, with his pretty hair, and cute grunts. And all his snide remarks, the comments how your outfit suits you, remembering what your favorite coat is, his random sarcasm, how he remembers all the stories you told him.

His mandatory habit of collecting the receipt with your doodles, how he informs you ahead of his schedule making sure you are a part of it, and simply being with each other.

It is not just a question what this situation is. It is an enigma.

You hate him.

And damn right, he hates you too.

But you both say goodbye with smiles on your face.

Another meeting is set on a shared online calendar you previously both agreed on.

Also, the house still belongs to both of you.

a/n: I admit I get jealous of the "love experience" and I admit I never tried a relationship. Because like what I wrote, it was not the fear of love, it's the fear of losing someone you love.

[watchfuldeer]

last night i went to a really fun and informal fundraiser evening with jesse and lucy at westminster school, where they were interviewing each other. i got to ask a question which i’ve mused upon for some time about tom, shiv and greg. enjoy! full transcript under cut

Transcript

me: so i’m gonna have to look at what i wrote down.

jesse: that’s alright, you’re highly in credit since you know more about the show than us. more about john berryman.

(laughter)

lucy: tell us what we’ve done wrong so far!

me: god, no. i wouldn’t! so my question, this is a character based question, and one thing that probably got a bit subsumed in the fourth season just because everything was happening. but i’d like to know more about tom and shiv, and also greg. because my read on the situation between the three of them is that greg is a source of marital strife (laughter) that shiv never noticed, and what would it have taken for shiv to notice the depth of greg’s presence in their marriage.

jesse: uh huh.

me: and tom’s attachment to him.

jesse: uh huh. sometimes you get little bits in life or you see something and you’re like, i wish we were making the show, because i suddenly do want to hear shiv say ‘greg you’re a source of marital strife’.

(laughter)

jesse: that’s like, when you’re like, that’s gonna be in, we’re not gonna cut that.

lucy: absolutely.

jesse: (doing greg voice) wh-wh-what?!

(laughter)

lucy: yeah. well we enjoyed that, didn’t we. we had a scene in america decides, which was the only scene between shiv and greg.

jesse: oh yeah.

lucy: the election episode in the final season where she takes him into a little room and threatens him.

me: ah, but it’s jealousy over lukas, over the greg and lukas thing, and it’s like, have you forgotten your husband, who is also very attached to this limpet?

lucy: yeah. i would also say that there are marriages in which a third party is not an unuseful thing, as well. not in a forgiving way about infidelity, but i would say that there are things that tom can express with and at and on greg (laughter) as it were, to greg, that are useful because he’s both a - you know the great, the interesting thing about tom is that he’s both a courtier and a bully. he’s that rare combination of someone who you totally believe as being almost like (mimes bowing and doffing cap) ‘oh yes sorry thank you yes ma’am’ and also like, ‘i’m gonna kill you’ and that juxtaposition is what makes him so interesting.

but in his marriage to shiv he has no real way, until quite late i guess in the final season, where we explore it, to hold power over her and to use that part of himself. so he’s accepted the acquiescing, he’s accepted the role of courtier in that marriage, and greg is quite a useful place where he gets to express all of that, the bully in him so that maybe it doesn’t have to come out in the marriage. which might be bad, because perhaps it should do and then the marriage would’ve ended much earlier, yknow, when shiv would just be like ‘i’m not dealing with you challenging me in any way’. so it’s not until that balcony scene i think where he really challengers her much at all. possibly the beach scene, where he sort of says that he’s considered leaving her, and how that would feel. but with aggressive challenge? it’s all directed at greg, and greg is allowed to be the place where all those feelings go.

me: but the affection - there’s also affection between them.

jesse: YEAH. and i think that’s the other thing maybe you’re alluding to is like, she… i think, some things you know you’re putting in the show because you talk about them and other things just naturally occur, and audiences and people tell you what the show is and what you put in there and you didn’t even realise, but i think we were aware of this - she’s oblivious. her obliviousness is a big part of her wealth and her upbringing and… so there’s something homoerotic going on between greg and tom.

me: i mean it’s not for me to say.

(laughter)

jesse: and does she… i think there’s two ways of reading that, either she’s oblivious, and that’s intriguing and possible. the other is that she sort of - there’s a scene in, you know that one, in the sun valley media conference in argestes, where we wrote a bit where shiv shows up unexpected and tom’s sort of flirting with someone, and it never really landed that much. i think we were like, oh this really gonna, shiv’s gonna spark up when she sees him flirting with someone. and it’s one of those things where you were like, you know what? i don’t think she gives a hoot, really, does she.

(laughter)

jesse: it’s like, she hasn’t got that, that’s not in her belly, that fear of loss.

lucy: no.

jesse: so i think that goes, that probably goes for a same-sex relationship or flirtation as much as it does for with a woman.

lucy: i think that’s true.

jesse: like she really… even if he was like - and this is not the way that tom would be like - ‘i think i’d like to sleep with greg’, i think she’d be like (mimes looking at watch) ‘when?’.

(laughter)

jesse: (as shiv) ‘not when i’m in the city, that’s weird, tom’.

(laughter)

jesse: i don’t think she’d have any fundamental objection to that.

lucy: that’s true. i think jealousy is quite a low status emotion.

jesse: yes.

lucy: and i think that she would struggle to feel it.

(jesse laughs)

lucy: even if it was present in some way, she would never be able to access it because it would put her too much at a disadvantage. so i think yeah exactly that, it would be like, ‘oh i guess you’re going to fuck that boring woman now are you, tom’ or do that, like… she has to be here (mimes one hand above another hand) so jealousy can’t really be accessed by her. so she might be irritated by greg, but in the way you would be by a mosquito.

me: to her detriment.

lucy: to her detriment, sure, ultimately yeah.

[ravstars]

HELLOO this is like the first time I'm requesting here... umm so an idea came up to my mind, it's about Wanderer's little story about sewing a doll. It's on his character menu. He basically learns how to and sews a doll, and then he starts bringing it everywhere he goes... but what if his S/O discovered about/saw that his boyfriend had actually something to be attached to? IDKK feel free to do the request only if u want, if you don't mind I'd prefer a male S/O... that's it!! Ty for reading and for ur attention!!

(I find that so cute help me, HE HAS A DOLLLLL so cutie)

MY DOLL ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა

⌇Wanderer/ Scaramouche x Reader.ᐟ

જ⁀➴Fluff: See above for request <3

a/n: I hope you like the way I wrote it, Anon! Thank you for the request, I hope you have a great rest of your day ^^. I‘m sorry that you had to wait a little. HAPPY PRIDE, LOVES <3

You knew of some parts of Wanderers extraordinary history, having become his friend after Lesser Lord Kusanali introduced you to him. He hated every second he spent with you, he‘d say, with his signature scoff and a roll of his eyes.

Truth is, he had grown fond of the idea of spending time with your reassuring and caring presence, even when he felt like he didn’t deserve it. Not that you needed to know when you could just understand from the way he pulled his hat down when you teased him on the way to the Akademiya or from the way he‘d tolerate your occasional energetic behavior even after he had a long day. Even in silence, there was a mutual understanding between him and you, no words needing to exchanged for you both to know how you were feeling.

He hated it — Feeling vulnerable to you. He couldn’t help but cave on some nights, though, looking up at the night sky and watching the stars with you when you couldn’t sleep. So, yes, you knew of his past, even if not completely and appreciated every part of his vulnerability and trust. He knew he could trust you, he didn’t know if he should, though.

—••••—

“Oh, come on, it wasn’t that bad.” Your laughter takes him out of his thoughts as you walk around Sumeru City, talking about whatever crossed your mind as Wanderer listened.

“I don’t need people to know about my personal affairs, much less if I’m involved with you.” He grumbled, clearly flustered about the encounter earlier at the Grand Bazaar. A merchant had inquired if you and the Wanderer were in a relationship, and even though true, your lovely boyfriend was too embarrassed to answer.

“So what, I am your lover, am I not?” He basically shuts down, turning beet red

“Shut it.” He pulls his hat down, speeding up to escape your teasing.

Suddenly, a rock gets in his way and he trips, sending him straight down on the sandy ground. His hat falls right off too, and he makes a startled sound. You’d think it’d cute if you weren’t just slightly worried but surprised too.

You kneel next to him.

“Wanderer?”

He has his guard up again and now both of your gazes land on what fell out of his hat.

“What is this?” You ask, snatching the object from the ground before he can, dusting it off.

It was a little and soft doll with white clothes and black hair, a waistband tied using a butterfly knot, and a clear, round tear at the corner of his eye. You pet the top of the dolls small head with your thumb before looking back at him. His brows are furrowed and he’s blushing profusely

“Give it back.” He says, but you just hold it. You knew Wanderer too well, you knew what he was thinking

“I’m not making fun of you, I like it. I love it, actually.” You slowly give it back, smiling gently.

“He’s my travel companion.” He puts it back, keeping it safe underneath his hat. You help adjust his hat and help him get up. You keep walking silently until he feels less embarrassed and finally talks.

“Thank you.” He says, mumbling quietly. You respond by humming, taking his hand in yours, which he then squeezes tightly. No one understood him like you, no one cherished him like you, no one loved him like you and no words could express your love for one another.

“Who does the doll represent?” You ask, curiosity overtaking you

“Someone from the past. It doesn’t matter, anyway.” He turns to you and , in rare occurrence, smiles at you, genuinely and sincerely.

“You’re the one that matters to me from now on. For forever.”

Forever — That sounds lovely, doesn’t it?

[highseas-swede]

Aziraphale and Trauma

[Just a note that I initially wrote this in response to this post: https://www.tumblr.com/theangelyouknew/732357015604756480?source=share&ref=_tumblr which is full of insightful info. I'm reposting my response here with some minor edits so it's easier to find in tags.]

This is something I actually find interesting within the fandom, because there seems to be this weird divide in fandom when it comes to Aziraphale.

See, I love Aziraphale. I think he's an amazing and well nuanced character, but a lot of the time fandom boils him down into this really simple version of himself. This happens both with people who dislike him and claim he's a bad person as well as with those who want to soften him up and make him more palatable. Aziraphale isn't the only one who has trouble with black and white thinking here!

Things like Coffee Theory remove Aziraphale's agency because the thought of Aziraphale doing something to hurt Crowley deliberately is something they can't stomach. If Aziraphale is acting under some kind of major magical influence, it means that it's possible to brush over the fact that he can - and has - hurt Crowley in the past and it certainly hasn't always been accidental.

There's a lot of Psychology I could touch on here, but it's honestly such a complicated topic that I don't really feel I can do it justice attached to a completely different topic.

But one thing I do want to touch on a bit is how Aziraphale asserts control in his own life via his connection with Crowley, and that touches on something equally complicated, which is something that's probably hard to understand.

Abuse victims are often manipulative.

I don't mean this at all as some kind of slight or insult. I've been an abuse victim myself and it's one reason I know it's true.

Fandom talks a lot about Crowley's trauma and he's got loads, to be sure. I think of that meme about "this bad boy can fit a lot of trauma" and it's very true. I've even seen people mention that Aziraphale has a different kind of Trauma than Crowley, which is also true.

What I haven't seen is someone addressing that the type of religious trauma is a form of CPTSD. CPTSD or "Complex PTSD" is a very specific form of PTSD. PTSD is characterized as being the result of a traumatic event - Crowley's fall, for example, is a good example of PTSD and I can go into that at some point. CPTSD is different because it's not a singular event, it's the result of being in a constant high stress situation. A lot of abuse victims - especially those abused by parental figures or significant others - have this form of PTSD.

A good way to see the difference is in comparing how they relate to their trauma. When Crowley thinks he's lost Aziraphale in S1, it sends him into a spiral. But importantly we see that this traumatic event is causing Crowley to go back to another traumatic event in time, triggering his memories of his fall. This emphasizes how much Crowley's fall defines his trauma. We rarely see him experiencing trauma at the hands of Hell, as he's mostly allowed freedom to handle his job on earth the way he wants.

https://cptsdfoundation.org/ defines CPTSD as "the results of ongoing, inescapable, relational trauma. Unlike Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Complex PTSD typically involves being hurt by another person. These hurts are ongoing, repeated, and often involving a betrayal and loss of safety."

In humans, this is caused by having no sense of safety in key moments of development. It strips away sense of self, sense of worth and really any agency. We even see the angels using direct gaslighting tactics on Aziraphale in S2, which I'm surprised doesn't get mentioned more often: When they come to the bookshop looking for Gabriel, they mention Gabriel and then almost immediately when Aziraphale asks "you were looking for Gabriel", Uriel outright says a line that goes something like "Did we say we were looking for Gabriel?", leading Aziraphale to fumble and try to remember if they did, in fact, say that at some point (they did).

So, one big thing to know about CPTSD and this kind of abuse related trauma is that learning to lie and be manipulative is often what people have to do to survive. Children with abusive parents will learn how to be manipulative in order to get what they need or avoid losing things they need.

We see this with Aziraphale, time and time again. He could just ASK Crowley for things he wants. A lot of people point out that he could ask and that Crowley would probably give in to him most of the time anyway. But that's not how it works in an abusive home. Instead, Aziraphale maneuvers Crowley into situations where Crowley is forced to give him what he needs or wants.

His lack of agency, as a result of his CPTSD, is also why he needs to be worked into making decisions that he already knows - or at least suspects - are right. That's why they have their little dance every time Crowley has to talk Aziraphale into something by finding the right way to frame it so it makes sense with Aziraphale's strict rule structure. These rules exist as a defensive mechanism too. Having rules makes it easier to figure out how to avoid being hurt and Aziraphale cannot simply step outside the rules because it's Not Safe. Not even with someone he trusts as much as Crowley.

The entire apology dance scene stands out for a few reasons. Everything Aziraphale does in the entire scene is an act that allows him to take control of the situation. He's already won, so to speak, because Crowley is back and Crowley is going to do what he wants. The apology is unnecessary on every level.

This post talks about how uncomfortable Crowley has to be sharing a space with Gabriel. Gabriel is with the abusive team, whether or not he was directly involved with Crowley's fall. Crowley also harbors a severe distress and mistrust of Gabriel because of Gabriel's attempts to destroy Aziraphale, the most important person to Crowley. But it's worth noting that Aziraphale is uncomfortable too.

Another good indicator of how stressed Aziraphale is with all this is that he doesn't eat ANYTHING when Gabriel is in the shop. The only food he consumes in modern era is when he's in the Bentley which is a "safe" space. Gabriel constantly hounded Aziraphale over eating and despite offering Gabriel hot chocolate, we don't see him partaking himself. He does briefly drink to demonstrate how "drinking tea" works for Muriel, but he doesn't seem to drink from his cup at all after demonstrating.

The bookshop is also Aziraphale's safe space, his ONLY safe space - Crowley still technically has the Bentley, and honestly I feel like Aziraphale wanting to borrow the Bentley is actually partially because he needs to get away from Gabriel and the Bentley is the only place that feels safe for him at the moment. Shax ruins any illusion of safety for him, but Aziraphale is much more enthused for his trip in ep3 and a fair amount of it is because he's not trapped with Gabriel.

A small note here, as a thought occurs to me. Aziraphale asserting that the Bentley is "our car" is probably mostly for himself. He's trying to realign his thinking to make the Bentley an acceptable "safe space" for himself prior to the trip.

There is a very different relationship dynamic when it comes to Gabriel and Aziraphale because Gabriel is the constant source of Aziraphale's trauma. He's Aziraphale's superior, the one he has to report to, the one who passes down his missions and his punishments. When Aziraphale takes Gabriel in, he's just invited his former abuser of over 6000 years into his safe haven. This is a hugely uncomfortable thing for an abuse survivor.

Worst of all, because Jim is, for all intents and purposes, NOT Gabriel, Aziraphale can't bring himself to lash out at his former abuser the way he wants to.

That brings us back to this apology scene.

There are two major things going on here and both of them are bad and hurtful toward Crowley. They're also both intensely unfair. I love Aziraphale but this was definitely a dick move.

Firstly: Aziraphale is using Crowley to reassert a sense of control over the situation because he is spiraling. He can't assert control over his life and his shop, which is one thing that he falls back on heavily, and that leaves him scrambling to find somewhere where he can control his situation. He makes Crowley go through this whole unnecessary apology and dance routine because it makes him feel like he has control over SOMETHING in his life right now.

Secondly: Aziraphale is also enacting his own trauma on Crowley. He's treating Crowley the way Heaven treats him. This is a direct parallel to the way Crowley terrorizes his house plants because he can't do anything to the people who actually caused his trauma. This is, obviously, wildly unfair of Aziraphale to do - and I'm fairly sure there are other small moments where Aziraphale does this in a mild way, I'd have to rewatch again.

These are both behaviors common in CPTSD caused by environments that apply this constant state of stress.

I'm not going to say it's right, or that Aziraphale isn't being a bit of a bastard in this moment - he absolutely is - but this behavior does have some obvious triggers that might be easy to overlook. It's just important to understand that Aziraphale is falling into self-preservation habits that are actively detrimental to his relationship with Crowley. It's not just the manipulation, he's also hiding things and lying to Crowley when he really shouldn't be - both things often necessary in abusive environments - but he's doing it because that's the method that he's created that works with his abusive relationship in Heaven and he's falling back on it because he feels unsafe. The trouble is, this survival tactic does not work with Crowley and actively makes things worse because it shuts down open communication entirely.

[jade-len]

so today i tricked my very straight male friend into reading svsss.

okay look, i wasn't planning to at first and it's not like it was completely my fault. he wanted to read it!

i was showing him how badly they fucked up mu qingfang in the donghua by comparing it to the english novel design (he said that mu qingfang went from looking like a soft dilf to a predator registered on the epstein island list). and then, i showed him how different some of the other character designs were like gongyi xiao's ("he looks like he'd be a genshin character" -friend, to eng novel design) and luo binghe's ("lowkey, he kinda gives airbender vibes" -friend, to bunhe eng novel design)

so that was all i was gonna show him, nothing else. but after seeing them, he goes, "these designs actually look hella cool. what's the book called?"

now, do i:

A. tell him the name, eventually revealing that it's a danmei when he looks it up?

B. just straight up tell him that it's a danmei?

C: don't tell him the name just yet, spill the summary, get him interested, and tell him to not search anything up about it because there's heavy spoilers and it will reveal them the moment he types it up on the search bar

i go with C, obviously.

me: so, basically, some guy named shen yuan transmigrates into an incel harem male power fantasy novel where the protagonist, luo binghe, has hundreds of wives. thing is though, the guy pretty much took over the body of binghe's teacher he had when he was a teenager, who turns out to be a really scummy dude. and now he has to be nice to him so that the protagonist doesn't rip off his limbs and put him into a pickle pot in the future to suffer for eternity.

friend: that sounds hilarious and horrifying at the same time.

me: yes it is, and you should read it. it's like. my favorite novel at the moment. but don't search up anything about it because people spoil that shit. i'll let you borrow my novel

friend: nah don't worry, i'll just pirate it

friend: wait. does it have pictures?

me, my plan coming together: yeah, it has pictures. buuut, when you pirate it, it doesn't. trust me dude, i tried and was severely disappointed. plus, the physical copy is so much better

friend: fuck yeah ok thanks

me: hold on though. i'll text you later to see if my friend who's borrowing it rn is done reading it

he's hyped. he's excited. he craves a good book and a good transmigration interpretation. he's especially happy about the fact that it takes place in a chinese setting with cool powers and an actual good main character. "this sounds so good, god i wanna read it so bad."

i tell him that binghe is actually adorable, too. that it's pretty much found family! my friend then asks if shen yuan adopts him and becomes a father figure or something.

and i said "yes". you know, like a liar. (the father figure part probably isn't a lie though)

now i'm gonna give him the novel tomorrow! of course, i'm gonna cover the chapter 2 bunhe sexual awakening scene with washi tape and say that my baby cousin (sorry baby cousin, you would never <\3) scribbled all over that paragraph with her markers, and since i'm a neat book freak, i put washi tape and just wrote the scene! i don't know if that's really all too believable, but he didn't seem to care that much. just a simple "if my baby cousin did that to my book i would punt them into the sun"

i think what'll be more hilarious is the fact that you can't really tell that svsss is a BL. especially not volume 1. there's like, only a few lines indicating, but if you remove the baby binghe sexual awakening scene then you probably won't be able to know (...if you don't really read romance or anything. idk he's kinda dense anyways). so let's hope he gets attached and has a slow descent into the homo before i drop svsss vol 2 on him!

ok anyways i'll update you guys later with a reblog. maybe in about two or three days lol

(also don't worry, we already fuck around with each other on a daily basis like this. he's already tricked me into reading some manga i was unprepared for, and i thought that it'd be funny to mess around with him using svsss this time lol)

[hezuart]

New helluva boss episode is out, any thoughts?

Season 1 Fizz: Robo Fizz was mean and called children ugly. Real Fizz called his guests “freaks”. Called Moxie an "ugly little bitch". Bragged about his fame and the money made off his robots and was even really pissed off his robot was destroyed at that theme park and wanted to sue

Season 2 Fizz: Extremely insecure, extremely nervous, hates the robots produced in his image, never bad mouths anyone and is really kind and nice to his competition, knows ASL and gives inspiration to children 

Who on earth is this guy???? You’re not Fizz??? By god, she’s done it again! Another male main character has been uwuified!! 😰When will it end???

~~~

Mammon: “You’ll be like the son I never had!” Fizz is elated at this, but Blitz’s dad already treated Fizz like the son he never had? Literally gave him a card saying he wished Fizz was his son. He was treated super well and was the most beloved within his circus. I mean, he did lose that, and him explaining everything he has is because of Mammon, and so I get it, he has an attachment to all this. I like that we are expanding on his character, but I feel like its overdone. The insecurity is a little too much. The panic attacks are a little too much. (Dude lost his arms and legs in a freak fire accident and its a creepy fan that he probably has to deal with on a daily basis that sets him off? I feel like he would be a tad bit mentally and physically stronger to deal with. I mean, he fricken talked back to STRIKER, a serial killer holding him for ransom locked in a cage last episode??? But he freezes up when an annoying fan criticizes him? Just feels inconsistent.) 

Mammon saying “If you’re a chick, give up on your dreams, because woman ain’t funny” and then Vivziepop’s name appearing in the corner… there’s so much to unpack there. I think Viv meant it as like “I’m a woman, so I can write that joke!” or “I’m a woman, who wrote this show and is therefore funny so Mammon is wrong and it's ironic!” But it's been established that Viv neglects and mistreats her female characters. They’re either all bitches or cardboard cut outs whose entire existences revolve around a male character. It’s low-key sexist. On top of the fact that, Viv may not actually be funny because most of the actually funny jokes in the show were written by Adam and Brandon, who are both men. So its VERY ironic, but not in the way she believes it to be. 

The irony of Mammon hiring an Imp who idolizes him only to exploit him and treat him like garbage… weren’t their exworkers of spindle horse that felt that way? 

Some people think that Fizz’s creepy fan is like.. Viv’s poke at her critics but I don’t see a comparison at all. This guy is a super super big fan that wants to work with Fizz, which isn’t what the Viv critics want. I’m pretty sure that’s the whole point- is that they want nothing to do with her? So I’m pretty sure this guy just represents a creepy fan, which everyone gets. Like a Syndrome character. 

Also in season 1, Blitz killed imps left and right for Stolas, but when that fan is actually getting close to Fizz and threatening his life, Blitz doesn’t kill him on site. He just hits him with a gun. Thank goodness he kills him later but Blitz has never really been discreet. It was just weird forced timing I guess. Season 1 Blitz would have never hesitated. He would have killed that guy on site.

I will never get over Asmodeus’s weird coat, his anatomy changes with whatever he’s wearing lkdsgjldkfj 

Mammon and Fizz are pretty much just Valentino and Angel Dust , but no physical exploitation (other than his robo replicas)

The Glam and Glitz sisters are really cool I’m obsessed with their performance, but we go right back to Viv’s 2 types of women: bitches. They’re bitches to each other too. They’re sisters who have like amazing choreography and on stage chemistry, and yet they constantly fight, like… how do they even function 

ALSO THEY GOT TOM HARDY TO SING HE’S NARRATING THE COMPETITION YOU GOT THE INTERNET’S FAMOUS MUSICAL COMEDIAN TO SING A SONG FOR YOUR “COMEDY” SHOW WHERE THE SONG ISN’T EVEN FUNNY It looks like he wrote it himself but… if even Tom can’t make it funny then who can???? I’m mad on his behalf 

Also… the ASL imp

…. “I want to be a clown just like you! : D “ Fizz: Exploited for money as a clown ever since he was young, gained a boatload of insecurity because his boss was so pushy, forced to deal with sexual encounters, sold his likeness into a popular sex doll without actually wanting to, lost his arms and legs in a freak fire accident because the circus tents aren’t safe- Also Fizz: “You can do whatever you want to : ) “ This would have been a sweet moment if this wasn’t Helluva Boss!!!!!! This is Hell!!! what on earth are you doing Viv!!!! Kid pls do literally anything else with your life  Also how and why does Fiz know ASL

Ozzie and Fizzie getting a love song is cheesy you know, but…. Stolas X Blitz fans wish man… they WISH Oz x FIz is literally just the better Stolas x Blitz. Like this what the Stolitz fans want but its given to the side characters for some reason. Fizz’s end song was nice but All our main characters are just so flat Sad uwu special sweeties that have done nothing wrong... I'm just so sad to see them become former shadows of their badass selves. Our main characters were greedy, selfish, mean, sometimes creepy assholes. Now they're not. It was either an accident, they're hypocrites, or they were abused- and im like... this is Hell, can't we still have our main demon characters be assholes? I'm so curious what the explanation is gonna be for Blitz x Verosika. Is she gonna be framed as the bitch who ruined the relationship? Did Blitz "accidentally" steal her car and credit card because he was drunk? Like what else are we gonna strip away so he's "relatable"?

Nice to see Wally Wackford back I missed him 

I like how fiery Ozz’s design gets Ozzie confessing he loves Fizz to an entire crowd so all of Hell knows and everyone is like “OMG I KNEW IT! GOOD FOR THEM!” Being with a low class demon was something to be ashamed of. A power imbalance. Something seen as taboo in Hell. Now we have 3 top sin embodiments dating the lowest of low class in Hell and not only do people not care negatively, they’re happy for them. There’s no stakes. Our main characters can do whatever they want “You’re gonna regret revealing that Ozz!” how who are you gonna tell? the romance police? fricken Now we have Mammon! Add him to the reoccurring villains I guess!!!! yeesh 

(Clowns are apparently also like… influencers in this world for some reason???? I still don't understand Vivziepop's clown obsession I think this is just not my jurisdiction )

All things considered, not a bad episode for season 2, but im kinda at the point where I don't think helluva boss is gonna deliver anything outside of abused main characters with cute relationships I don't think they're gonna do anything else

[fixyourwritinghabits]

I noticed many of the protagonists I wrote or thought of writing had either no personality or one too self-inserted (sometimes somewhere in between) and now I can't really connect with the protagonists I write so I wanted to know if you have any advice to help me craft more distinct characters and get attached to them.

First, some homework - pluck out about five pieces of media and nail down what you like about the protagonists within.

What about them appeals to you in particular?

Did you like how they grew and changed?

What struggles did they tackle that only they could handle?

Doesn't have to be neat and orderly, just try to nail down what really appeals to you about your favorite characters. When it comes to your own characters, here are some more things to think about:

Are you writing the character you want to write, or are you writing the character you think you should write? You may not be able to connect to your characters because you're trying to make them something you think they should be rather than what you'd feel more comfortable writing.

Are you projecting your feelings on a larger canvas (aka write what you know)? Are you thinking about how your characters would feel in bombastic circumstances (fighting a dragon, running from the cybercops) based on experiences and emotions you've had (facing off with a teacher, hopefully not running from the real cops but hey, you do what you gotta). The best way to infuse your characters with appeal is to take an emotion or an experience you can relate to and projecting it onto your characters.

Do your characters have internal struggles to go with their external ones? Is that high-stakes heist also paired with the character's struggle to display his real emotions? Does the fight with the evil wizard reflect the character's struggles to connect to their dad? If your story is external-plot heavy, a good way to flesh out the characters within is to connect their internal wants/needs/desires with the events going on around them. That zombie fight could be all the more enticing if the main couple is having a massive break-up during it.

Figuring out how to write a protagonist is often more than filling out a character sheet. Great if you can do that (I can't so like, go brag about it somewhere else), but often times you'll have to flesh out the character the hard way, but plotting out their journey before you write it. Work on their inner needs and emotional battles to draw them out as people.

Don't know where to start with figuring out a character at all? Grab an archetype list and get mixing and mashing. You may not come up with usable ideas right away, but you'll be able to pick out the ideas that appear to you until you have a handy list of things to lean on. Tropes are tools to be used, after all, and anything that could add to your characters is a tool with keeping. Good luck!

[down-in-the-rainbow-square]

Remember that post that said u wanted to write that one, the reader goes into puppets/welcome home dimension?

I got u!

Can I request a Welcome home crew x reader, the reader from our world just looking at the website and suddenly blacks out. Then they open their eyes to see the puppets looking down at them! :D

Welcome Home x Reader - A Whole New World (and a Whole New Back Pain)

Not proofread! Thank you for the request! I'm definitely in my isekai sort of phase right now right x readers. For this one I'm just going to assume the reader hasn't discovered the hidden secrets of the website yet. Clown said we're only 5% in, so when we're closer to the end I'll do a remake with the reader knowing all the spooks and secrets (plus, it's really fun to just stick to the happy-go-lucky tune for now)!

I don't know what blacking out is like so I kind of just wrote random feelings instead. Hope that's okay!

P.S., This focuses more on Y/N than the characters but I'll make a sequel that focuses on them more!

Words: 1353

Type: Headcanons, platonic

Tw: food, mentioned kidnapping, mentioned death, injury

You were sitting at your desk when it happened. It was nearing sunset; a bowl of two-minute noodles sat cooling beside your laptop to serve as tonight's meal. Scrolling through social media, a sudden notification popped up on the screen. It was from a friend of yours.

Opening the message up, it read, "hey! Check out this website I found!" Attached to the message was a link to a cheerful looking website. Your friend described it as the link to an old and near-forgotten puppet show your parents had taped on VHS. You used to watch it together when you were really young, apparently.

Opening it up, you were sent to a title screen of sorts. It featured a little red house with a blue roof and yellow chimney. The website invited you to click on it. Doing so, you were revealed the real meat of what was inside.

The next half-hour or so was spent perusing the website. Some of the characters vaguely rang a bell; you remembered something about a guy called Frank, but you also thought there was a child, so perhaps you were making it all up. Maybe that was Wally.

Eventually, though, you were hit with a sudden drowsiness and a sick, twisting feeling in your stomach. Assuming hunger pains, you reach for you food on the desk. It would have gone completely cold, but you would have to deal with it. Fork in hand, you lifted it up to your mouth only to-

Only to wake up in bed. Strange; you never remembered going to sleep. The last thing you remembered doing was getting bad hunger pains and eating your noodles. Though you assumed you had just passed out in bed and not remembered anything.

You rolled around in bed. You were too tired to get up just now. You were about to drift off to sleep when you heard something - or someone.

"They're waking up!"

What in the hell?!

You instantly bolted upright only to be hit with a horrible pain in your spine that sent you back down again. Groaning in pain, you rolled over onto your side and opened your eyes to see... People? No. Monsters? Maybe. No, they were definitely puppets.

Looking up, you saw you were surrounded by them. They were all different shapes, colours, and sizes, but shared the same look: concern. Concern for your wellbeing or concerned because their meal just woke up you didn't know, but you didn't plan on staying for long enough to find out.

Again, you tried to sit up, ignoring the excruciating pain in your lower back. It was then that you realised this was also not your bed you were in. No, this was much larger than you could afford and had a red wood frame with feathers carved into the head.

Your first thought is that you've been kidnapped. Your second thought is you've been kidnapped by puppets. Instantly, you try to heave your way off the bed, only to be caught by a pair of arms. Well, two pairs of arms, actually.

"Hey, hey! Calm down!" Looking up, you saw a tall, green puppet looking down at you. He slowly placed you back down on the bed. Taking a closer look at his facial expression, he almost looked scared.

"Wh- what are you?" you whispered. You didn't care if it sounded rude, you'd rather be rude than clueless.

"I could ask you the same question." You turned to look at the source of the noise to see a different puppet. He was of medium height (for the puppets, of course) and had grey skin. Or felt, for that matter.

"What?" you replied.

"Well," the puppet began, "for someone who fell out of the sky, you sure seem fine."

Fell out of the sky? What was this guy on about?

"Wait, I what?" you asked. The puppets shared a look.

"You don't remember?" another puppet asked. He was about the same height as the grey puppet, but had yellow skin and red hair. "There was a lot of yelling."

"There was?"

Safe to say, you were confused. How could you have fallen out of the sky and not remember? Unless you suffered some kind of head trauma, which would explain why your back was in such pain. But if you truly fell from the sky, wouldn't you be dead?

Eventually the puppets managed to calm you down enough for you to not try to run every chance you got. They told you their names, and you told them yours in return.

There was Howdy, the one who had stopped you from running away and hurting yourself; Frank, the grey one who had told you what happened; Julie, the one who had come to help you first; Poppy, whose bed you woke up in and who cared for you while you were out; Eddie, who was the first to actually notice something falling from the sky; Barnaby, who had carried you to Poppy; Sally, who had kept the morale up for the other puppets while you were out; and Wally, who had assisted in taking care of you.

You found them all to be very interesting in both their appearances and personalities. Sally, who you had been informed was once the brightest star in the entire sky, was a rambunctious, creative soul always ready for an adventure and new ideas. She often proposed imaginative but impractical solutions to your back problem.

There was Julie, a kind and fun puppet with long blonde hair. She was always playing some sort of game, or editing one to allow you to join, even when you didn't quite trust her. Her favourite to play with you was Patty Cake, because it was simple and could be repeated as many times as she wanted. Sally liked to join in on that one for the singing. You were surprised she knew what it was.

But no matter how intriguing you found the puppets; they were always more fascinated by you. They constantly asked you questions about who you were, where you lived, what life was like. Howdy was very interested in the 'Click and Collect' system you had at your local supermarket. The ability to know someone's order beforehand without even a telephone was incredible to him.

Frank was by far the most interested. He was always asking you questions while you rested in Poppy's bed. At one point he left for about fifteen minutes before coming back with a whole bookshelf's worth of books. How he managed to carry it without breaking apart you had no idea, but he looked strained.

Frank had sat the books on the floor and started going through each one, repeating his questions only to throw the book away when it didn't match what you said. He ended up with every book thrown in the messy pile by the end of it and was quite angry.

Everyone was surprised with how similar but how different your worlds were. Things like recipes, games, and speech were all the same and yet you had all this technology they didn't, and they had whole species you didn't. Howdy was shocked to know he could never exist in your world, and Sally was upset to learn that she would only ever be a ball of gas (though she felt a bit better when you mentioned how huge they were).

But more than anything they were surprised with you. The first time they saw you eat was fascinating. Sure, (for the sake of the television show) they can eat, but not like that. What you were doing was just plain weird by their standards, with your odd moving of these 'muscles'. Wally had asked you what you were doing with your mouth and was shocked (and a little disgusted) to see your teeth.

The day seemed to go on forever in this little town you were informed was called Home. Poppy was too big for her couch, but refused to move you, so you ended up sleeping next to her. It was comfy, if not a little suffocating.

I'll be making a part 2 for this!