#i would have been SHOCKED

[bikananjarrus]

time for my thoughts on temptation of the force! (with a healthy dose of the eye of darkness thoughts, bc i forgot to do a wrap-up post for that book whoops).

spoilery thoughts under the cut:

To start with (maybe?) an unpopular opinion: as much as i loved this book (and i really did!) i think (PERSONALLY) i liked the eye of darkness just a bit more (if i'm just going to compare the phase 3 adult books).

this is definitely due to just my personal tastes; i love stories about grief. eye of darkness was so much about grief, and loneliness, and getting knocked down over and over, and struggling for every inch of ground to claw one's way back to the light, back to hope and home. eye of darkness was also (in a way) a ghost story. the ghost of stellan, the ghost of starlight, the ghost of the other jedi that were lost, the ghosts of the people missing across the stormwall, etc.

which that kind of love - the kind that creates grief, that creates these kinds of ghosts - that's one of my favorite things to explore in stories (and my own writing), which is probably why eye of darkness spoke to me a bit more. the more i think about it the more i realize how much i loved that book.

however!! i did still really love TOTF, and i like that it had a bit more positive tone as we gear up for the big finale next year. avar and elzar being reunited, being stronger together, figuring out the stormwall (mostly), actually getting some wins, things are going better. it was so well-done, and i really loved it. it just didn't floor me in quite the way i expected it to, but that's not a bad thing; it was impactful in a different way.

that said, let me talk about the things i loved about this book! starting with the non-firebrands/non-elzar+avar highlights:

burry pov!!! it was so wonderful getting burry's pov in this book. the way burry describes the Force and his empathetic connection to the people and world around him was such a treat to read. the scene in the beginning when he was on oanne and he touched the grandfather tree was an incredibly beautiful scene. additionally; him understanding why the oanne locals won't--can't--leave their home planet, bc wookiees have such a strong connection to kashyyyk too; him having empathy for the dying drengir bc it was dying alone, disconnected from the rest of its hive; him realizing at the end that the empty feeling of the blight is homesickness. i just loved the way all these things tied together, and it being burry to make these connections bc he understands it in a way the other jedi don't (which was a nice tie back to LOTJ with him being the only one to realize there were survivors on board pieces of the legacy run emerging from hyperspace)

also burry and bell's friendship means so so much to me. burry being able to defeat a nameless bc he felt bell's fear and refused to let bell die. bc bell saved him from the eiram ocean, and he couldn't let bell die afraid the way he almost had. i just....i love them a lot <3

i adore cair and xylan. xylan is such a fun character, who we know hides a lot of his true feelings behind ridiculously thick walls and a bunch of different masks and many layers of fancy silks, and it just makes me want to crack that man open like an oyster. i think cair feels the same lol. their relationship is just so interesting and that scene with xylan locking cair in his bunk to force him back across the stormwall was OOF. i can't wait to see where they go from here.

marchion was marginally more interesting for me in this book. the thing is, i like him as a villain! he's smart and i appreciate that he has a million back-up plans, and he's got an aesthetic and sticks to it! but i'm not really sure what to do with him so far in this phase. i feel a bit similarly with the nameless. i think marchion and the nameless were more interesting when they were such an unknown factor to the jedi.

the most interesting marchion part in this book for me was the chapter where he was envisioning ghirra and viess being consumed by the blight and just totally ignoring their bickering. i think it's a precarious line to walk with making villains stereotypically "crazy" or "mad", but i think the THR authors have done it well so far. and giving marchion this mysterious air with seeing visions and dead ancestors was really enjoyable.

(i know i will learn more about his ancestors and history of the nihil, nameless, etc. in phase 2, so maybe i will feel differently and understand his motivations more after that)

but right now, he's lost a bit of luster for me; but i trust charles soule will be able to bring it back for the finale.

now for my beloveds, elzar, avar, and the firebrands:

chapter 1 and 20. that's it, that's the bullet point. i live in those chapters now. they were absolutely my favorite parts of the whole book. after so much miscommunication and misunderstanding between elzar, avar, and stellan over the course of the adult books so far (really starting after LOTJ), getting to see elzar and avar just sit down and talk and reflect, and talk about stellan and everything they've been through, it meant a lot to me.

i adore elzar and avar on their own, but for me (personally) the real heart is the three of them. so for me, the elzar avar scenes where they talked about stellan were just a smidge more impactful for me than just the elzar avar scenes alone, which is why chap. 1 and 20 really hit for me.

that being said, i still loved all of elzar and avar's scenes A LOT. avar's love confession to elzar was so so beautifully written. and when she kissed him on naboo in front of everyone!!!!!! LOST my mind!!! elzar's "i don't think i've known you without wanting you"....... what an insane thing to say. what an insane thing to WRITE, tessa. and avar's "in my worst moments, i've loved you. in my greatest grief and failure, i still loved you, and it didn't turn me down the wrong path - it's what got me back on my feet...love is limitless." OOF. truly truly one of the most beautiful love confessions i've ever read.

i mean i could talk for five hours about avar's confession and her understanding of how she loves elzar, and in response, elzar's talk with yoda about love and attachment. that needs it's own post, honestly. but to sum up: tessa wrote love and attachment so fucking perfectly in this book. like tessa GETS IT.

the scene at the end, when avar lends her strength to elzar to fight off the nameless, and it being described as a star. stellan's strength right there alongside avar's, giving it to elzar so he can fight back. the song, the sea, and the star imagery will always make me feel so insane.

(but even with the star imagery at the end, my one, very nitpicky thing, which is also just personal preference again, is that i wish stellan's name had gotten mentioned one or two more times at the end. i don't think his name was mentioned at all in the last 50 pages or so, and there was a perfect opportunity to do so when avar had her brush with death. either she could've thought about joining stellan in the force, or elzar could've thought about already having lost stellan and he won't lose avar too. i get that the focus was very much on avar and elzar at the end there, but i think to really bring it full circle, there should've been one more mention of stellan)

i think elzar is going to play a huge part in defeating the nameless. it's been hinted at before, even back in LOTJ, the unique way he sees the force, and uses the force; the fact that he has touched the dark side of the force, and has a better understanding of the force and how it affects him; him being able to shut himself off from the force in such a way in the fallen star that for a while, he wasn't affected by the nameless on starlight as much as the others; and then here at the end of TOTF, with the way him and avar are now connected in the force, i think his understanding of the force is going to expand and he's definitely a key component, i think, to the eventual defeat of the nameless.

my last thought for now: about halfway through eye of darkness i was getting a strong feeling that, by the end of all this, elzar might die. i still think this is a possibility. but now, i think there is also a stronger possibility that if he dies, he and avar will die together. just based on how connected they are in the force alone, i think if one goes, the other will follow. (i also maintain that i don't think any of the adult-adult characters are super safe, bc there's been such a strong emphasis on the younger adult characters, and this future generation of jedi, that i wouldn't be surprised if they killed off more of the older adults to make room for the young knights).

overall, i really did love this book! but strangely enough, i think this is the one i need to sit with the most. the first half of the book was REALLY hitting for me, and then idk, by the end i was like "that was really good, but....that's it?" who knows, it could be that having read all these books back to back in such a short amount of time finally caught up to me haha, and my brain just shut off. i think i just need to sit with this one more, and reread at some point. but right now, in my honest opinion, i didn't like it as much as eye of darkness.

(as always, i'm happy to hear everyone else's thoughts, so feel free to send me asks/dms/replies on this post etc. i feel like me not liking this book as much is definitely not the general consensus, so i'm curious what everyone else thinks lol)

[egophiliac]

(looks at upcoming card releases)

I'm in danger :)

[inkskinned]

you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.

but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.

well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?

his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.

still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.

so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.

and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.

what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.

it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?

it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.

maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF ruin ending in a nutshell

(Based off @/fallenchungus post)

[starry-bi-sky]

on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.

Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.

Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.

Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.

There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.

[claraoswalds]

#mrs flood who are you: time lord edition

[stealingyourbones]

Out of all of the people The Ghost King Phantom expected to relate to, it definitely wasn’t the scrawny red headed photographer of the Daily Planet. Jimmy Olsen has gotten so many temporary superpowers over his time being Superman’s friend. Hell, he once gained a 4th dimensional being’s reality warping abilities when he was given said dimensional being’s powers during a fight. Sure there’s a dozen or so heroes with the same amount of powers he has, but none as suddenly granted to them as a all powerful god that can relate to a teenager.

[redfirefox-55]

Have some very low effort AU doodles

[ofswordsandpens]

I rewatched Zuko and Azula's Agni Kai recently and it's left me wondering – when Zuko begins to goad Azula into striking him with lightning, was he making the decision to kill her?

Because had Azula shot lightning directly at him like he planned and not at Katara, the most forthright implication to me is that he was intending to strike Azula with her own lightning. And Azula, for all her mastery, would not have been able to counter that.

On the other hand, maybe he wasn't planning to kill her at all and was simply planning to redirect it elsewhere (similar to what he did with Ozai). But given the tone of tragedy throughout the Agni Kai, the fact that they both acknowledge that this fight will be "the end" to them, I don't think it's inaccurate to read Zuko's actions as him preparing to kill Azula, even though an Agni Kai doesn't have to end with death (and in canon it didn't). Also, why goad her into striking him with lightning if he wasn't planning on doing something intentional with it? If anything, it adds another layer to the tragedy to me, because I don't believe Zuko wants to kill her. And it stands in such contrast to the way that Azula desperately wants to kill him.

I also think that there would have even been something sadly poetic in that sort of demise for Azula should the Agni Kai had gone this direction: Azula, struck down by her preferred sub-skill. Azula, struck down by the very bolt of lightning that she intended to kill her brother with. Azula, struck down by her own power.

[weirdo-from-bonesborough]

Somebody has definitely said this before but au where bruce kills the joker and gets arrested by the un (can the un arrest people?) so when dick get back from space he finds his brother’s dead, his dad’s an international criminal, and the batman is a 13-year-old boy.

[funsizedcrow]

People love to talk about how much arson wild does and thats fun but also lets remember that in twilight princess in order to progress the game you do have to set a building full of bombs on fire. and it does explode.

[charafansmile]

Trying to do hw but my mind solely wants to think about how charas motivations only make sense if you look at it from the eyes of a child and that ignoring them being a kid is how the fandom got stupid ideas in it's head of them being a mass manipulator who's entirely evil even though the game beats it into our head they made the plan BECAUSE they loved the dreemurrs. Like obviously their plan was never going to work it was a bad fucking plan from the getgo and little kids are 1) stubborn and 2) not known for thinking things through????? People saw asriel call them not the greatest person and a say he wished frisk was his friend (which fair!! Charas plan did get him killed and was the catalyst for things going wrong!) And immediately jumped to making them abusive ignoring all of the evidence that chara did care about and loved monsterkind.

[dirtytransmasc]

atwow hot take:

if jake had said his "son for a son" shit out loud and spider had heard him, he would have been so beyond pissed, he would be seeing red.

spider loved his little siblings so much, neteyam included, even after they grew apart. he loved them like they were his own blood and protected them like they were too (we see a lot more of them together in the comics, where spider is the big brother without a doubt). neteyam's death most certainly rocked him hard, even if he hasn't really been able to show it (how could he? he's already going through all the shit with his dad and the RDA and their nonsense, he can't grieve around neytiri, he's just so tired after it all. he doesn't have the room or the energy to grieve yet)

so if jake had the audacity to say that to/around spider not even a few hours after he watched his little brother get shot after coming to save him, after he stared at the bullet hole in his back, after he watched him take his last breaths, after he watched the light leave his eyes, after he watched his little brother die for him; if he said that while his little brother's body lay in a pool of his own blood not even ten feet away, not even cold yet, blood still clinging to his chest, the scent of it still filling the air: he would have lost his shit.

because the disrespect for his brother is wild.

jake was an active player in spider's neglect and abuse for the last 16 years, he let it happen, he helped it happen. he tried to send spider with the humans, tried to take him away from his siblings, from the forests, from eywa to live with his foster family that didn't love him (not to mention Nash was an asswipe of epic proportions) and the RDA of all people. he had referred to spider as a stray animal since he was little. he was the reason spiders life was hell.

and after all that, years and years of putting him in shit positions and allowing him to suffer the fate of being forever unloved and uncared for (by an adult authority figure, cause I love the kids, but they don't make up for the gap left by a parent), this is what it took for jake to care about him? his little brother had to die in front of him first? he had to be traded out to fill the space of a corpse, to fill in the gap left by his little brother's death?

in canon, spider was in deep in shock with nothing to break him from it, he wasn't in the place to really think about any of it, and I'm sure we're gonna see this anger in the coming movies, but if jake had said it out loud, that would have been enough to snap spider right out of it, and he would have given jake a piece of his mind, I just know it.

[silvers-starrway]

So the wildest thing happened where @mactheactor decided to dub over (if that's even the correct terminology) the Chaos Sonic animation I made!!!!

I'm still in utter awe about this like, hands down the coolest thing ever I've been thinking about this non-stop. Hope y'all enjoy it as much as I do!!

[neonhellscape]

most offputting twink youve ever seen in your life

[whatevertheywant]

You ever think about how the Uplands would have been such good in-laws to elphie????!!!