#i would die for that squishy face
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first owl visit of 2025 ↬ bts
#i would die for that squishy face#owl naps#95% sure this is the female#the love birds#owl#photography#pacific northwest#pnw#nature photography#wildlife photography#forestcore#cottagecore#naturecore#photographers on tumblr#owls#barred owl#mine: photos#lensblr
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i would actually commit mass murder for s1 mike wheeler but like that's just me tho
#no u DONT get it#his little FACE#his teensy weensy little voice ❤️❤️❤️#his little squishy cheeks 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#HIS RUFFLEABLE HAIR!!!!#i would die kill bite injure rip down walls for him i think#mike wheeler#st.txt
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Naruto men with a chubby s/o
Tw: mention of stretch marks and weight loss, but overall it's mostly just fluff
(Includes: Kakashi, Obito, Gaara, Kankuro, Shisui, Itachi, Sasuke, Madara and Naruto)
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Kakashi
Loves absolutely everything about you and doesn't shy away from showing you off to everyone
Touch starved bby loves to snuggle with you and use your stomach as his personal pillow. It's his favourite part of your body, aside from your face and hands
Would never judge or scrutinize you if you choose to eat something unhealthy as a little treat
Even though Kakashi is known for his level-headedness and overall chill demeanor, he has a zero tolerance policy when it comes to snide remarks aimed at you and will brutally destroy everyone who said the wrong thing with his words alone
Obito
This man is on his hands and knees appreciating you and your perfect body
Can't keep his hands to himself and finds it adorable when you chide him for getting handsy. (He just can't help it, okay?? You're just so soft and squishy and warm. The perfect snuggle buddy for the certified cuddle bug)
If you have stretch marks, rest assured that Obito will find them just as beautiful as the rest of you and trace and even kiss them oh so tenderly
Wouldn't hesitate to deck everyone square in the face who dares to say something even remotely insulting to you
Gaara
Thinks you're the definition of perfection and divinity
Loves resting his head on your thighs and will fiercely shower you with love and words full of adoration should you ever feel insecure about them (or any part of your body for that matter)
Would never tease you about your weight, let alone even think about it (#1 supportive king with the purest of hearts)
Should you ever find yourself struggling with finding fitting clothing, Gaara will ensure you're always dressed nicely/comfy by hiring someone to make clothes tailored to your preferences
Kankuro
Completely and utterly adores and loves you to the moon and back. And no amount of prejudice can or will change that. Quite the contrary actually. The more people try to tell him to break up with you and "choose wiser" next time, the more stubborn and protective he gets
He's cool with people making jokes about themselves, including you and himself as well. But he will intervene immediately if he feels that you are overdoing it and actively destroying your self-confidence
Shamelessly grabs and smacks your ass every chance he gets. He just loves watching it jiggle or giving it a firm, but not bruising, squeeze. His motto is: "If I can't grab it, I'll slap it"
He's your biggest hype-man and will stop at absolutely nothing to make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence
Shisui
Shisui is not afraid of showing his complete adoration for you and worshipping you like those ancient deities. That's how high his standards are for himself
That man would literally die to have you lay on top of him and smother him with your love while touching you everywhere. And by that, I really mean everywhere
Loves to fluster you by calling you things like "Gorgeous" and "Sexy" and winking playfully at you (It's his way of boosting your confidence)
He's more than happy with your body and how things are. But should you utter the wish to lose some weight, he will be right there to support and encourage you on your journey
Itachi
When he looks at you, all he sees is a smart, attractive and overall just lovely person who deserves the world and nothing less
Will listen patiently to you whenever you're feeling insecure about yourself and offer advice and words of encouragement once you're done venting
On particularly bad days, like when you're talking about yourself in a self-deprecating way, Itachi will gently interrupt you and start listing all the things he loves about you. It hurts him seeing you being so harsh on yourself and counters it by being gentle in response
Doesn't give a flying fuck about what society considers "normal" or "desirable". You are the apple of his eye, his beloved. And he's pretty damn happy with you as his partner
Sasuke
Despite the general assumption that Sasuke is more the superficial type of guy, he actually doesn't care what body type you have. He loves you for who you are. Looks are secondary in his eyes
He won't judge you if you have a sweet tooth or like hearty meals, but he still makes sure you maintain a healthy and balanced diet, for example by cooking with you
If someone's mean to you, I guarantee you that be will not let that slide and make it his mission to teach whoever made you feel bad about yourself a very unpleasant lesson
When you're cuddling, Sasuke will gently trace the crevices in your skin, making sure you can feel his love for you in every single one of his touches
Madara
This man adores every pound on your body and does not tolerate any self-deprecating comments, joking or not
If you're feeling insecure about yourself, he will acknowledge your feelings and remind you that he wouldn't be with you if you weren't attractive, both inside and out
Can effortlessly pick you up and carry you around and will do so to prove his point (his point being that you're effing perfect and should give zero fucks about what others think of you)
If he catches someone saying something negative about your weight/appearance or even looking at you the wrong way, he will glare at them with his sharingan activated and put them in a Genjutsu where he makes them go through their deepest fears and relive their most gruesome memories
Naruto
Another supportive king who would go absolutely feral if someone offended you and would happily get into a fistfight with them to defend your honour
Absolute sweetheart who loves every curve of yours and thinks you're the most beautiful person on earth. He's not necessarily good with words, but he wears his heart on his sleeve and will make you feel loved and desired in his very own, unique way
Dead ass Talk-no-jutsu's you if you ever doubt yourself and/or struggle to see your own worth and beauty. You eventually have to shut him up with a kiss because otherwise he would spend the next two hours gushing about you to you
Clings to you like a baby monkey every chance he gets, because he just loves loves loves how huggable and soft you are and how much comfort you bring him
#kakashi hatake#obito uchiha#gaara#shisui uchiha#itachi uchiha#kankuro#sasuke uchiha#madara uchiha#naruto uzumaki#kakashi x reader#obito x reader#gaara x reader#kankuro x reader#shisui x reader#itachi x reader#sasuke x reader#naruto x reader#kakashi headcanons#obito headcanons#gaara headcanons#kankuro headcanons#shisui headcanons#itachi headcanons#sasuke headcanons#madara x reader#madara headcanons#naruto headcanons#naruto#my writing#naruto imagines
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Leon - Squish - (SFW & NSFW)
Hi everyone!
We still can't get over the fact that this man is built like that and that he put on 40 lbs of pure muscle between RE 2 and RE 4. Honestly we've spent many hours discussing his squish so have some of our fav headcanons:
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Every part of this man is rideable - thighs, biceps, throat, ab, face, doesn’t matter, any port in a storm and what a pretty, squishy port he is.
u love gently pinching and biting his cheeks bc he still has some of his lil baby face from his rookie days
his lap is the comfiest place to sit
your throne
Leon will grab you by the hips and pull you onto his plush thighs at any point
soft and pillowy but you can feel the muscle when he flexes
You love his little freckles that come out in the sunshine and the summertime - there’s one on the inside of his beautiful thigh scarily close to his dick and it makes him feral when you kiss or bite at it.
To Leon, the only benefit of working for the US Government is travel perks - when flying he always flies first class, and it's the only time he can be comfortable on public transport bc he’s a unit of a man
Any other time, he has to curl in on himself and crush his legs together to not take up more than his designated space.
can spread his thick delicious thighs as much as he wants
in the summertime he likes to workout outside
will do push-ups whilst shirtless
you try not to pass out at the sight of his muscles flexing + slick with sweat
sometimes you’ll sit on his back as he does this when he wants some extra weight
baby boy is so strong it makes u drool
Loves wearing shorts but gets self-conscious if he wears them in public.
Absolutely will steal your sunglasses to wear whilst he’s outside - (we couldn’t get the image of Leon shirtless in little shorts wearing heart shaped sunglasses out of our heads)
one day he wants to surprise you by wearing his old rpd uniform (cute play on all the times you would playfully call him “officer Kennedy”) but you hear him grunting in frustration from the bedroom so u go to check it out
shit does not fit this man
not even a little
trousers caught around his legs bc the material won’t fit over his juicy thighs + ass. You’re trying not to drool at the sight. waistband is fr about to snap
dick bulge bc the trousers don’t fit over that either
shirt also doesn’t fit - buttons are straining within an inch of their life against his broad chest, waiting to pop
only thing that does fit is the old bulletproof vest - barely.
��Never got to wear my summer uniform, and I didn’t want to buy a new one so… I tried to make my own but…”
baby boy is blushing in embarrassment at his failed attempt to be sexy
but oh he has no idea
what he’s doing to you rn
have to pick your jaw off the floor at the sight of him
he’s sweating a little too from the effort
you want him to choke you out with his thighs or biceps, you’re not picky
You tell him to turn around and you’ll try to help him pull them up at the back but this is a ruse - you just want to see his ass jiggle as he tries to force the trousers up.
“I’m sorry, I can't get them on..” he whines, annoyed that he can’t surprise you anymore.
“It’s okay, pretty boy, I need you to take them off anyway”
devouring this man like he’s a piece of cake on god
strawberry to be precise
When you’re fucking him, if you grab at his ass it’ll drive him crazy
You have to resist the urge to motorboat him when his bare chest is freely offered to your greedy eyes.
the juiciest tits u ever seen
Don’t be fooled tho - tho this man is a beast, he ‘s actually a puppy on the inside.
He absolutely adores getting to cuddle with you and lie on your chest and snooze - because he’s bigger than you he tends to worry about crushing you but you reassure him that it's okay (glory glory what a hell of a way to die).
We could go all day (much like Leon) but we’ll stop there for now!
Comment “Bingo!” if you made it to the end, and let us know if you’d like more!
Love,
Ichigo and Dream xoxo
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Emily: “I’m really sorry Vaggie didn’t feel comfortable coming back here. If there’s anything I can do to change that-”
Charlie: “Probably not! It was kinda a sign of her endless love for me that she visited haven again at all!”
Emily: “Oh! Oh that’s nice!!”
Charlie: “Which I NEVER would have asked her to do anyway, if I’d KNOWN the truth about her history up here!”
Emily: “Right. I’m so sorry about that too, by the-”
Charlie: “I mean, I’m not the kind of girl who askes her girlfriend to go spend an afternoon sitting across from the people who ripped off her wings! And her eye! And left her slumped against a dumpster looking half dead!”
Emily: “A… dumpster?”
Charlie: “Making the woman you love relive all that without even rEALIZING it would be pretty fucked up, wouldn’t it??”
Emily: “V- very.”
Charlie: “IT HYPOTHETICALLY COULD MAKE SOMEONE FEEL KINDA TERRIBLE AFTERWARDS, DON’T YOU THINK?”
Emily: “I’m sure it did!”
Charlie: “H Y P O T H E T I C A L L Y”
Emily: “Could! I could see that, yes, if it HAD happened, that would’ve been…”
Emily: “…”
Emily: “Are you- um, is she, errr.. doing better now?”
Charlie: “SO much better she’s doing SO great these days!!!!”
IN HELL
Vaggie: (lying face down on the hotel lobby floor) “I promise I won’t stop helping you morons when she dumps me. I won’t let her dream die just because I was dumb enough to think I could be part of it.”
Angel Dust: “That’s nice toots.”
Vaggie: “Thanks.”
Angel Dust: “Not sad or stupidly gay or anythin’.”
Vaggie: “Thanks.”
Cherri Bomb: “Sad? Angie, it’s perfect!” (takes picture) “I’ve been thinking this place could use a new rug…”
Niffty: (stepping on vaggie) “Squishy!”
Husk: “Get the fuck off her.” (at vaggie) “You, get the fuck UP.”
Vaggie: “Why.”
Alastor: “Hmmm, because this is PAINFULLY pathetic to watch, even for me?”
Vaggie: “Guess I’ll be here forever then.”
Angel Dust: “Vag-GAY c’mon, ya girlfirend’s not gonna dump ya. What’s the competition even!?”
Vaggie: “There’s an angel up in heaven who's helping Charlie work towards her life long dreams as we speak, and she's taller than me, got more wings than me, not as stabby as me, and also not a mass murderer or a liar or missing an eye.”
Cherri Bomb: "Hey!"
Vaggie: "No offence to the other one-eyed ladies here, but it's different when you've got a fucked up empty eye socket."
Niffty: (sighs dreamily) "I bet losing it hurt soooo baaaaad..."
Vaggie: "Never telling my girlfriend why I'd actually lost it or how it made me look like the deranged murder angel I was, even while she tried kissing it better for me, ended up hurting way worse."
Angel Dust: “That's a point….”
Angel Dust: “...alright, so Charlie’s PROBABLY not gonna dump ya-”
Niffty: “Oh that’s a weird sound!” (giggling) (bounces on vaggie) “I think she’s dying~”
Husk: “If you fucks kill her, I’m telling her demon princess girlfriend and pouring myself a drink to go with your fucking tormented howls.”
Vaggie: (muffled) “what if she’s my ex-girlfriend”
Husk: “…I’ll pour you a fucking drink and listen to your tormented howls.”
Niffty: “ME TOO I’LL LISTEN TOO!”
Alastor: “Dear one, perhaps if you were NOT standing on her skull and compressing her WRETCHED cries into the floor, we could be hearing them already.”
Niffty: “Whoops~ Heheheeh~”
Cherri Bomb: (recording it) “Damn, that groan’s been going on for ages… Bitch has some lung capacity on her.”
Angel Dust: “Point one for Vag-gay! Probs as good eating out as ya are at HOLDING out on ya girl!!!”
Vaggie: “uuuughhh…uaauuugghhaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaahhhhrrrgh..” (whimpers)
Niffty: “Okay.” (GIGGLES) “NOW she’s dying~” (bounces)
IN HEAVEN
Charlie: “Everything’s totally fine I have NO idea why you’d even ASK!”
Emily: “You’ve spent the entire time up here staring at pictures of Vaggie on your phone?”
Charlie: “I’m allowed to look at my girlfriend!”
Emily: “While crying and sniffling into your sleeve?”
Charlie: (sobbing) (desperately patting down her jacket) “SHE’S THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS WHICH OF MY POCKETS HAS THE HANDKERCHIEF IN IT, OKAY??”
Emily: (smiling) “I think you two are going to be just fine.”
Charlie: (BLOWS NOSE LOUDLY INTO JACKET SLEEVE, which catches on FIRE)
Emily: “…..not your clothes, though. You might need a new set of those.”
#hazbin hotel#charlie morningstar#chaggie#emily hazbin hotel#vaggie#angel dust hazbin hotel#husk hazbin hotel#alastor the radio demon#niffty hazbin hotel#cherri bomb hazbin hotel#incorrect quotes#silly nonsense#charlie comes home without her suit jacket and vaggie literally faints thinking she's given to some other angel#charlie does not get why everyone is happy to hear she burnt her own jacket off on accident#while trying and failing to find her special demon-sneeze proof handkerchief#which vaggie (once conscious again) pulls out of her own blouse#bc remember babe- we figured out you kept mistaking it for part of your pocket lining? no matter which pocket we put it in???#so vaggie just started carrying one for her instead#it immediately comes in useful again#emily watches cherri's livestream of this via pentious's phone and CHEERS#while sTILL covered in the ashes and soot of charlie's former jacket#negotiations with heaven are going great#chaggie has a fanpage up there now and everything
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Jerk Ford AU: The Worst Ford You Know II: Cosmic Switcharoo
~15 or so years ago
"Ya know you can just… not do this, right? You are a squishy human that's not even that special. All you have is a brain that is outclassed by countless amongst the multiverse, and a sense of misplaced righteousness that ya deserve somethin' grander as retribution for being bullied."
"The Oracle said that I would be the one to-"
"-beat Bill Cipher, same face, yada yada yada."
"You have talked to The O-"
"For Pete's sake Stanford, every Stanford that is thrown in the multiverse has talked to her! All of us! She gave the same goddamn bullshit spiel to thousands of us- maybe more!
If we all had a grand destiny to beat Bill Cipher- with this many 'Destined Heroes', why the Hell is he still out there, causing problems and bein' a major bitch?"
"So you're just going to not even try?!"
"Why bother putting myself in harms way? Bill is going to be another distant Stanford's problem with another hero complex. Me on the other hand? I'm tryin' to get back home to my family, because I know there's at least one person who will accept me no matter how many fingers I have, no matter how much social decorum I don't have, and especially not a 'lack of ambition' that's only ever noticed by supercilious versions of us, like you."
"Mark my words, Jerk Ford; ignoring your Bill Cipher problem is going to bite you in the end. Also, your Jersey is showing."
"Mark these nuts, Bitch Ford; ya fly's been down the whole time."
*supercilious = behaving or looking as though one thinks one is superior to others.
[Dialogue primarily by @tearosepedall]
There's a lot of difference between Canon Ford (Ford-46'\) and Jerk Ford (Ford-PJC311), one of the first things is how they return to their dimension.
Before Canon Ford returned to his dimension, he was doing his last-stand against Bill Cipher, and he went into his own portal when it popped up to stop Bill from doing it first.
Jerk Ford had heard about how most 'good' versions of Ford Pines were doing that, but he didn't see a point in doing the same because it wouldn't get him home faster, and most if not all of them would most likely die. So he got drunk the parking lot of a Space Waffle House, and his portal showed up.
Even though he injected himself with a Drunk-B-Gone concoction that he created to end alcohol intoxication, it needed a minute to take full effect.
Anyway, this is how Canon Ford returned to his dimension:
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Dipper: What...? Who is that?
Stan: The author of the journals... my brother.
Mabel: Is this the part where one of us faints?
Soos: Ohoho, I am so on it, dude.
Meanwhile, this is how Jerk Ford returned to his dimension:
Mabel, Dipper, Soos: …
Stan: …
Jerk Ford: …I'm okay. *thumbs up from the ground*
Now let's say, something went wrong, that some cosmic wires within the hologram of reality were crossed, and somehow, someway, Canon Ford and Jerk Ford went through each others portals instead of their own. Perhaps their chance meeting almost two decades ago did something, and now they're in the wrong universe.
In Dimension PJC311 (w/ Canon Ford):
Stanley is elated to see his brother, after three whole decades, finally! His hard work has paid off! He's so excited, he doesn't notice that Dipper starts visibly vibrating in anger as soon as "Author of the Journals" leave his mouth.
He greets his brother with open arms - although, the way Stanford stalks towards him, it's almost like he's about to hit him. And does he seem a bit more... serious?
He barely has time to look confused as Ford rears a fist back - there's a THUNK sound, but a blow never lands on Stan. Because Ford is now keeled over on the ground, holding the back of his head because Dipper had just wacked him with a metal fold out chair that he found.
Ford, on his end, is in pain and confused (but mostly okay because of his protective metal plate) as Stan takes the chair away and scolds Dipper, telling him to apologize because no matter how unhelpful his journals were, he's still family.
His journals, unhelpful? That can't be true. As Stan is still trying to get 'Dipper' to apologize, Ford pulls back out the Journal he'd just picked up off of the floor, and quickly scans over it.
It's in his cursive handwriting, and drawn in his hyper-realistic sketching style. But... the entries are wrong. They're worded in a way that tells the reader to do the opposite of what they should do. Anyone who follows the advice of this would end up hurt, ridiculed, cursed, or some combination of those.
Even after thirty years, Ford knows for a fact that he would never write his research like this.
The kids and Soos start demanding answers. Stanley starts giving the backstory of himself and his brother, the portal incident, and the thirty years spent trying to fix the thing, it becomes abundantly clear to Ford that this isn't his world when the details don't line up the way they should.
Forgave him for the Perpetual Motion Machine? They went to Backupsmore together? He was banned from every establishment in Gravity Falls? People think Stanley murdered him???
In Dimension 46'\ (w/ Jerk Ford):
Although Stan is confused (although he does also find it a little bit funny) that his brother stumbled out of the portal and landed flat on his face, he's so excited to finally see him that he let's it slide for now. As long as he doesn't get drunk around the kids in the future, he'll excuse this incident.
Jerk Ford recovers pretty quickly as his Drunk-B-Gone finally takes full effect, and he walks over to Stan, accepting and returning the hug offered. Dipper finds it strange that "The Author" walks right past his Journal on the floor, even though he clearly noticed it.
Moreover, Soos notices something just as Jerk Ford withdraws from the embrace and steps back to properly take in his surroundings.
Soos: Are those... are those crocs?
Jerk Ford: aRe thOsE CrOCs? Do you even hear yourself right now? Of course they're crocs. I'm almost sixty, The Drip can take the backseat.
Stanley is certainly taken aback- sure, his brother could be insensitive sometimes, but he's never seen him rapid-fire mock someone outright. Also, even after thirty years, he never saw his brother as the type to pick up and use modern slang.
Also, did he really just call the kids "Twerps"? Ford had never been a kid person, but-
The kids and Soos start demanding answers. Stanley starts giving the backstory of himself and his brother, the portal incident, and the thirty years spent trying to fix the thing, it becomes abundantly clear to Jerk Ford that this isn't his world when the details don't line up the way they should.
Turned his back on him? Homeless conman? They didn't speak for ten whole years? Stanley faked his own death???
In Dimension PJC311 (w/ Canon Ford):
This time, Ford does not give his half of the story, and uses the excuse that he needs a minute to collect himself. He doesn't know what dimension he's in, he just knows it isn't his own.
The motley crew of an alternate version of his brother, his apparent grand-niblings (one of which hates his guts), and a large hairless gopher (his nephew?) tell him about being encroached on by the U.S Government, and he handles them just like he did in canon; he is surprised however when Stanley tells him to only erase the memories he needs to, and not to add something unnecessary 'just because it would be funny'.
Stanley also questions how Ford forgot how to use the memory gun, considering he invented it.
Wait, what? Uh, it's been thirty years, he forgot some things.
When they get the agents off of their backs, Ford looks at what had once been his home. It was certainly more lively and lived in than when he had last been here. Things not entirely organized, some things out of place here and there but expected when there were two children in the house.
It was a home. And it wasn't his home, in more ways than one.
He notices a particular photo on the mantle - because he had a near-identical one, once upon a time. It was the one taken shortly after he'd mathematically proven Fiddleford's hologram theory. There's a few differences however; for one, Ford in the photo looks more smug than excited, for another, Fiddleford is enraged and looks like he's trying to strangle him, but the biggest difference is that Stanley is there and he's struggling hold Fiddleford back.
When he snoops around a bit, and in what must be Stan's office or study, he finds amongst other things on the wall (pictures of the twins, Soos throughout the years, and a red-headed girl appear quite frequently) that Stanley has a masters degree in Education and PhD in Analytical Chemistry. He has teaching awards going back decades.
Words that Stanford heard a lifetime ago and hadn't thought of in a long time come back to mind with startling clarity:
"No, no. You don't understand what I've been through! I've been to prison in three different countries! I once had to chew my way out of the trunk of a car! You think you've got problems? I've got a mullet, Stanford!"
In Dimension 46'\ (w/ Jerk Ford):
Like his canon counterpart, Jerk Ford chooses to not give his half of the story, using the excuse that he’s still in shock and needs a minute for his fight/flight/freeze to die down so he can think clearly. He doesn’t know what dimension he’s in, he just knows there’s been some kind of mix up in the cosmos.
When the alternate version of his brother and their grand-niblings, and a giant hairless gopher who may or may not also be his nephew, tell him that some government agents are after them, the first thing Jerk Ford asks for is his memory gun.
The grand-niblings look baffled (because they knew it was Old Man McGucket who created the memory gun), but give up the memory gun, and Stan looks suspicious because he had no idea that ‘his brother’ had built a memory gun. Just like in canon, Jerk Ford memory blasts Agents Powers and Trigger, but once they’re gone he also casually drops the following tidbit to Stan;
Jerk Ford: I also erased the concept of how to take a left-hand turn while I was at it.
Stan: …Why?
Jerk Ford: To make their drive back to D.C more… entertaining. *snerk*
Stan wonders what being gone for thirty years really did to his brother, and Dipper is still fanboying over ‘The Author’ but Jerk Ford makes a rude remark about Dipper “hovering over him like a fly on s[beep]”. He does, at least, promptly clean up his language when Stan tells him to watch what he says to the kids. Jerk Ford notes that this version of Stan is more aggressive than his own, which is typical of the variants he’s seen over the years.
Stan tells him about the Mystery Shack - like most versions of himself, Jerk Ford isn’t a fan, but he isn’t going to be in Stan’s face about it. Who knows what the circumstances of this were?
Jerk Ford: Was teaching not paying you enough?
Stan: Teaching… what?
Jerk Ford:
Jerk Ford: Nevermind what I said *steals a novelty shirt in front of everybody*
The layout of the cabin is different, but it did remind him a lot of home. When he and Stan had moved to Gravity Falls, the way the interior was set up and decorated always seemed to be a clash of the brothers interests. Stan’s insistence on making the place seem more like home, and Ford’s projects and research always haphazardly breaking free of the confines of his lab, bedroom, and study. This version of Stan seemed to find a happy middle, because a lot of weird and cryptic objects were there, but integrated and functional to what a home was supposed to be.
But it still wasn’t his home. This wasn’t his family.
While Stan was distracted with trying to get the kids to go to bed in spite of the excitement earlier, and Soos was making a rambling phone call to someone who sounded tired on the other end, Jerk Ford snuck off to snoop. He didn’t used to be so covert when it came to messing with other peoples stuff, but after that incident with a non-portaled Ford who nearly killed him, he was more careful with that these days. You never know when you’ll find skeletons that should have been laid to rest, and inconsolable crypt keepers who’d sooner bury you instead.
It looks like someone had beaten him to the punch of looking through Stan’s more hidden things - a lot of stuff that confirmed what Stan had already covered when talking about his and his brothers backstory. Fake id’s and news articles. Nothing that really stood too much to help Jerk Ford figure out who’s dimension this was. This Stan’s backstory was almost beat-by-beat similar to the one he heard from most of his variants, and versions of Stan that ended up being the one on the other side of the portal instead. That lack of a gimmick in this dimension didn’t make things easier.
Although… every aspect of this dimension seemed to be found, in at least some small way, in all of the other dimensions. Could it be…?
The prime dimension? The alpha timeline that many versions of Stanford Pines had been speculating about but never could confirm? He needed more data before he could-.
Well, this Stanley isn’t his brother, but if he’s going to identify this dimension and hopefully return to his own, he’d need to explain his situation to him first.
To be continued...?
#Jerk Ford#Jerk Ford AU#I thought it'd be funny if other Fords made fun of Jerk Ford when/if his Jersey drawl comes out#Jerk Ford has a harder time hiding his Jersey accent when he's emotional or riled up#I also thought it'd be funny if Jerk Ford called another Ford 'Bitch Ford' in response to being called Jerk Ford#Canon Ford and Jerk Ford both know each others proper designations#but aren't using them to be r u d e#ignore the fact that Jerk Ford is making a deez nuts joke in ~1997 it could have already been a meme in a different dimension#stanford pines#ford pines#gravity falls#grunkle ford#stanley pines#stan pines#grunkle stan#gravity falls au#au#dipper pines#mason pines#mabel pines#soos ramirez
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Ohh my gosh i just saw you take jjk requests.. could i please ask for some sweet cuddly headcanons or a scenario of heian era/true form Sukuna x small-ish but chubby ftm reader?
Oh also im sorry if its weird but i uhhh i headcanon Sukuna was kinda chubby himself during that time if you could include that somehow.. i dunno its just i love soft squishy men cause i am one okay thank you bye
Heian era/true form Ryomen Sukuna x chubby ftm reader
Headcanons
Cheering and jumping up and down whenever I get jjk requests. Im such a sucker for true form Sukuna. Sukuna nation. Sukuna is also around 8 ft in this, cuz I love me some size difference.
No one would suspect Sukuna of all people to be sweet or even cuddly, and no one gets to see it, except for you and maybe Uraume.
Theres nothing your big lug of a lover likes more than to lay his head in your lap after a meal, which was probably people knowing him, and having you play with his head or just caress his face.
Living on a regular diet of human would also mean that Sukuna has more meat on his bones in this era than he does in the 2000s when he wakes up again. Think like bulking and cutting when it comes to wrestling.
It would most likely also be a result of dating Sukuna that allowed you to get chubby as well, since this was during the Heian era, where one couldn’t as easily get their hands on enough food to get chubby unless they were very rich.
But if you already were chubby, then that was more than likely what caught Sukunas attention first. Maybe he thought you looked extra delicious to snack on, or you thought it was sexy, since he doesn’t get to see chubby people on the regular, at least not ones that are actually attractive like you.
Sukuna would enjoy you being softer too, since it means he can lay his big ol head on your torso or on your thighs, or that he can squeeze your body with his big hands.
Expect him to nip at you, anywhere on your body really, and rumble about how you are good enough to eat. You know he wouldn’t actually eat you, but he likes to threaten it. and it comes more across as flirting instead of threatening at the end of the day.
When it comes to being trans. Sukuna couldn’t honestly care less. Hes got Uraume around, what makes you think he cares how you present yourself or see yourself.
Sukuna would use it as an excuse to kill more people though, since anybody disrespecting you or people like you deserve to die in his book. Aint nobody gonna disrespect Sukuna, the king of curses, lover like that.
Would hunt down anybody who might have hurt you in the past, no questions asked. They wouldn’t stand a chance against your bear of a man, curse?
If you wanted top or bottom surgery, or even testosterone, he would find a way. They didn’t have treatment like we do now, but if anybody would be able to find a way it would be Sukuna, even if it means torturing sorcerers or curses to get it.
You can also dress however you want around Sukuna. Hes one of those “dress however you want babe, I can fight” guys. Sukuna himself also wears a woman’s kimono, so I don’t think he really sees gender in clothes the same way as sorcerers or humans might.
And if you feel insecure of dysphoric about your body, Sukuna might not be the best at comforting with words. But hed find ways to show he is there for you, be it pulling you into his lap, or just lingering around whenever he’s around. Would also order Uraume to make sure you are happy and have everything you need.
Speaking of pulling you into his lap. Sukuna loves the size difference between you. It isn’t hard to be smaller than Sukuna, but you being small-ish means he can easily have you straddling one of his thighs, the lower pair of his arms wrapped around your waist, and the upper pair doing something else.
Expect to be licked by his stomach mouth on the regular when this happens, or when you guys are cuddling. If not licked, then expect your back to be kissed when no one is looking, or nobody can see.
Sukuna would find It funny if it made you blush or turn to look at him over your shoulder whenever he does it. He just raises his brow like “what?” whenever you try to call him out on it, always saying you must be making things up.
The stomach mouth always ends up licking your hands when you guys are cuddling and you’re petting his stomach. When you complain about it, he just says it’s not that bad, and offers to let you lick his hands too, you’ll have to do it four times though, you guys gotta be equal right?
Sukuna doesn’t really focus on the fact that hes on the chubby side himself, but hes different compared to you. For Sukuna imagine those big weight lifters that have a thick layer of fat on their bodies because of all the calories they need, that’s how I imagine Sukuna.
He does a lot of fighting and a lot of eating and training, so him being chubby buff would make sense. He isn’t someone to feel insecure, but he would preen like a peacock if you gushed about how hot he was.
Sukuna likes to eat, that’s no secret. But he doesn’t just like to eat people, but treats too. So, you guys will have many times where you lay on top of his chest or beside him on one of his arms, the two of you sharing something sweet.
He expects you to feed him, sorry but he does. He makes up for it by playing with your hair with one of his hands in the meantime, so I guess it’s fair.
Yes, he also expects you to feed the stomach mouth, is that even a question?
He likes cuddling in the sun with a nice comfortable breeze going. Imagine him laying sprawled out on his kimono, you laying on top of him or beside him, the shutters to the room open, just enough wind and sun to make it comfortable.
Sukuna doesn’t snore, but he rumbles sometimes, kind of like a big tiger or maybe a lion. He also denies doing it, but you’ve caught him multiple times. It gets extra loud if you pet his chest or face.
You always gotta be careful cuddling with Sukuna though, since he might roll over in his sleep and roll on top of you, and you’ll feel like a pancake. Hes got all that bulk weighing down on you, knocking all the air outta you, but he makes a great weighted blanket.
Your lover also doesn’t like to be woken up, but when its you its not as bad. Best bet is to wake him up with kisses, he doesn’t seem to mind them that much. Sukuna does grumble and complain a little, but its not hard to sense that he doesn’t really mean it.
#male reader#ftm reader#chubby reader#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen imagine#jujutsu kaisen headcanon#jujutsu kaisen x male reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna imagine#ryomen sukuna headcanon#ryomen sukuna x male reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryoumen sukuna#jjk imagine#jjk headcanon#jjk x male reader#jjk x reader#ryomen sukuna x ftm reader#jujutsu kaisen x ftm reader#jjk x ftm reader#heian era sukuna#true form sukuna
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SWEETEST LOVER
Blue lock boys who are the BEST lovers ( I’m bias) Relationships with them { not proofread }
ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅ Chigiri, hiori, reo, isagi, kurona
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CHIGIRI H.
Chigiri is the definition of “best friend and partner” he’s rather open to you (having known for years) and also being the person who’s the best boyfriend you can could ask for.
The advice he gives is one of harsh criticism yet the most truthful, many would be surprised by how blunt he can be with you although it shows in how he cares and truly only wants the best for you. If opening your eyes with a hard truth will help then he will take that route.
Although of course, he isn’t heartless. He comforts you with a warm smile, heart beating at how attentive he becomes with you. Giving you the princess treatment one would die for. He knows comfort can differ in various ways, so he will always try and communicate on what you need.
I feel as though chigiri struggles with communication concerning his wants, so he tries to grow in order to be the best version of himself he can give you. Yet there will be moments where this can “problem” can arise and he will always realize his faults.
Other than that, his knack for his wellbeing swells into you as well. Hair is rather important for the guy, so when he comes to you with a grin about a new hair secret, expect a days worth of hair care. The two of you are seen as rather “gossipers” yet you two just find anything and everything interesting. Really, anything with chigiri can turn into an interesting conversation. Thus making him an amazing boyfriend and best friend in one<33 ( I could go on about him but I’ll save that for later)
HIORI Y.
SO UNDERRATED I LUV HIORI. Ugh he’s the sweetest I mean cmonnn…
With his already calm and polite demeanor, falling in love with him is that of a warm spring that flourishes into a bond greater than words can say.
A quick learner, can easily pick up your moods and will give it his all for you! Very much a giver and will cherish whatever you give him, hiori becomes emotional seeing how much you give to him, already viewing your love the best thing he could every ask for.
From his childhood, he was told he was loved, although feeling it would come and go. Yet when you come into the picture, it’s as if he experiences the feeling of being loved for the first time ever. His past one of hallow that now with you, it beams with hope and joy, making him the more doting on you with showing how much he truly cherishes what you have given to him.
The type of guy who would let you drag him anywhere, as his face is filled with adoration for you, soft smile evident as he lets your body take the lead as he follows you to no end. Out and about, would definitely rub your wrist gently before crossing the street whispering a faint “be careful” that causes your heart to race in seconds.
Can’t forgot how he would definitely, want you to game with him. Even if you don’t he finds a way for you to be near or engage with him. Whether that be you seated next to him or him lying across you, the peace hiori has in being close to you is infinite. A safe space he never wishes to let go of.
Seems squishy (don’t ask)
ISAGI Y.
GREEN FLAG I REPEAT ULTIMATE GREEN FLAG. Might be bias but cmon it’s isagi
The boyfriend who literally will do ANYTHING you wish for (as long as it’s reasonable ofc) Follows you around like a lovesick puppy as he comments on places he thinks you would like or you two should go to. Will love to get stuff where it compliments the other, almost as if something that matches.
He once asked you what you were going to wear and showed up with a similar color combo, mind you he bought you two the same shoes for days where you want to match.
The kind of guy who will hold eye contact whenever you talk, even if you can’t hold it with him because of how intense his gaze is. He will continue looking at you as id you’re all he can stare at. How can someone make you flustered without anything at all?? That’s isagi for you
Isagi is someone you admire, someone you learn from even as you two grow in the relationship. His kind heart giving you the courage to try new things as he supports you all the way, words of encouragement making a hue of light shine in your life.
Overall, a loving caring guy who always has your back and a cutie
BACHIRA M.
Bachira just like anyone has his…quirks. Although nothing severe to the point of destruction or hurting you. If anything he’s the most loyal and treats you with such care, fearing that one day you might perish or realize he’s not so called normal.
His insecurities one that you know from the beginning, tending the wounds he has held from years of the past. His reluctance to thank you with the best he can give you, his affection and loyalty to you one of scarce of losing you. He can’t fathom this, you with him. Together. So it’s only natural he wishes to show you what others cannot see.
There’s never a dull moment with him, his vibrant persona melting into you as you intoxicate in the newfound confidence he gives you. Bachira is the type to move you out of your comfort zone, making a break to see you in a new light that he’s lucky enough to see and be the cause for.
His affection spreads throughout every aspect, in public he resembles a dog that clings onto its owner that holds eyes filled with adoration.
His warm hands allowing for yours to bask in his warmth, feeling more as he squeezes yours and grins from ear to ear viewing your flushed expression. “There’s that face I adore oh so much!”
Eyes wander to your figure as bachira sees the shiver in your figure, cold winds swirling around causing you to feel the cold sensation of the winds. His embrace eternal, fitting like a puzzle as he snuggles up behind you swaying your bodies side to side. The norm would be teasing words, yet for now he embraces the delight with you in his arms.
Ah bachira
KURONA R.
Cutest boy I mean cmon he has shark teeth
No matter the time being, kurona can’t fathom that you’re truly his, his mornings being filled with a lovesick smile at the thought of you.
His teeth hold many stories, the most memorable being how insecure he is because of them, smile showing less due to this fact. But the day you tell him to smile, hands on his cheeks as you gaze into his eyes, the crack in his lips breaking as he smiles at you softly.
It’s only natural for kurona to want to be the reasons for your smiles, indulging in what will make your smile come to fruition so he can also gift you with his smile.
His adoration for sharks weaves into you, no matter what he makes a correlation between you. Expect matching trinkets of any shark related item. Plushies that greet you in a pair that hold eachother, his lips spilling the words of “look, it’s us”
What may come to a surprise is his ability to make you swoon with his words, maybe not directly, but on paper. The reassurance kurona needs is spilled onto messages late at night, showing his vulnerability on text because he cannot bear with how you might respond. He knows you would comfort him, although he knows his heart will experience speed to limits unknown.
So when morning dew comes and you wake up with his messages, your heart grows fond seeing just how much the boy wants you to know, his heart is all yours and he wishes to hold it for the eternity to come.
a/n; MONTHSS of not posting anything…prob cause I’m almost out of school and have inspo
edit; guys I’m sorry reo wasn’t added my ass was just tired after writing for bachira😞
#koiir writes#blue lock fluff#blue lock x reader#blue lock scenarios#bllk x reader#bachira x reader#meguru bachira x reader#isagi yoichi x reader#isagi x reader#hiori x reader#hyoma chigiri x reader#chigiri x reader#kurona x reader#kurona ranze x reader#blue lock fanfiction#bllk imagines
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LOVESICK POTENTIAL: sung jinwoo
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pairing: yandere!sjw/reader
UNFINISHED incoherent drabble brainrot on yandere!sjw hahaha... this is so unfinished but it fried my brain so badly all i can do is draw this out later because i cant write for long periods of time 😒 also english isn't my first language so this is really ERRR not good also no proofreading we die raw
tw: froth and nothing much
BEFORE THE DUNGEON EVENT:
This era of jinwoo was so cute he looked so squishy I'm biting my bedsheets. This time is the perfect moment where jinwoo gets his reasons on why he's a little cuckoo over [y.name].
Jinwoo always came home covered in bruises and maybe with a dent in his mental health. I mean not only you face life threatening monsters but you also face the words of your fellow hunters that consists of demeaning and degrading your whole existence does horriblewonders to Jinwoo's mental health! After when his mother came out of the picture by falling ill to the Eternal Slumber, Jinwoo had to face the expectations on becoming the breadwinner and help to keep his family a float.
Jinwoo doesn't have ambitions or anything during this time, not when he's too focused on trying to feed Jinah and pay the bills. He's a blank pitiful slate who's being driven by desperation and the promise he made to his mother to take care of his sister. He doesn't have anyone to turn to and he can't tell what he's experiencing to his sister because that'll make her worry for him! Jinwoo doesn't want his sister to flunk her studies because he made her worry for him... so he's basically alone.
Until you come in to the picture. [y.name] one of the few people who saw him as a person instead of some weak pitiful excuse of a hunter. It doesn't really matter how you meet Jinwoo, whether it be through connections, after a dungeon raid, or you randomly meeting him on the street, what matters is how you perceive him as a person and how you turn his miserable world upside down.
When [y.name] entered his life, it felt like a ball of light entered his dim world but not as if [y.name] was extremely energetic or what not. It was more like that [y.name] ignited something within Jinwoo. [y.name] would stop by and talk to Jinwoo, solidifying his self as a person. They would talk about ideals and goals and even encourage Jinwoo to maybe create his own when they found out that he didn't had any of his own. Jinwoo felt so warm inside whenever he'd spent time with [y.name]. He felt so inexplicably happy.
Jinwoo decided that [y.name] is his goal and the driving force of his ambitions.
Jinwoo limped a bit as he walked towards his small apartment he shared with his sister. It was what remained when his mother was sent to the hospital for falling ill. He groaned silently as he clenched his arm that was throbbing in pain. Even after being recently healed by Joohee, he could still feel the pain of his arm being battered to smithereens.
He wondered how many dungeon raids left till he'll perish by the hands of some low ranking monster.
The young man approached his door before suddenly being called out by a familiar voice. Jinwoo turned around and his bleak mood was changed into a more joyful one.
"Jinwoo! I caught 'ya this time!" [y.name] giggled as they skipped over to Jinwoo, a small mischievous smile plastered on their features. Jinwoo chuckled at [y.name]'s words as he admired [y.name]. He wondered what did he do in his life to meet [y.name]
Jinwoo hoped that the next dungeon raid isn't the one where he'll perish by the hands of a monster.
AFTER THE DUNGEON EVENT:
Jinwoo would probably avoid contacting [y.name]. After realizing he has a new opportunity to get stronger. His mental health before wasn't the best, he often thought he was pulling [y.name] back and has this mindset that he didn't deserve any of the kindness he was receiving from anyone especially from [y.name]
But now? he has now the chance to pay them all back by becoming stronger and become someone they can all rely on. So randomly... he'll just disappear from [y.name]'s life randomly. Jinwoo feels horrible but he isn't ready to face [y.name] again but he promises to himself that he'll meet his darling[y.name] soon.
Jinwoo would admire [y.name] from afar and sometimes do this just for the sake of answering to his personal question of: "I wonder how are they doing now?". Jinwoo is aware how much it hurts to [y.name] that he randomly disappeared from their life without a word especially how worried they were for him.
When Jinwoo finally deems he's prepared and worthy enough to face [y.name] he almost forgotten how different he looked when he last met [y.name]. Jinwoo almost scared [y.name] away when a devilishly handsome tall young man approached them with a bouquet of flowers in hand. Thankfully, [y.name] recognized the man from the slightly meek demeanor he showed.
Maybe after a few more meetups and catch ups, [y.name] would notice the many changes on Jinwoo's overall.. being? like aside from the fact he's now built like a sculpture made by the gods, he's more confident and charming?.. Jinwoo of course didn't miss the way how [y.name] would quiet down and stare at Jinwoo, taking note every little different detail on Jinwoo. This fed the hunter's ego and was proud how his hardwork paid off.
While [y.name] was admiring Jinwoo, they didn't notice how Jinwoo added a few of his shadows into [y.name]'s shadow. His love for [y.name] during their absence has doubled a thousand fold and the lengths he'd go for [y.name] is now boundless. Jinwoo's goal of achieving [y.name] might not be impossible anymore if he pushed himself a bit more just like what [y.name] says.
After meeting up with Jinwoo, [y.name] bid the hunter goodbye as they exited the cafe. [y.name] was pleasantly joyful that Jinwoo didn't forgotten about them and met up with them again after a few years but this still didn't made [y.name] pissed off over the fact he basically ghosted them for a few years too!
[y.name] walked down the cold street that was dimly lit up by the lamp posts around the area. They shivered a bit as they tried to warm up their hands by shoving one of them in their trenchcoat's pocket. [y.name] was on their phone when they suddenly bumped into a man by accident.
"ow.. oh? I'm sorry I didn't notice you there I'm really sorr—" [y.name] stammered out as they bowed their head in apology but then they felt a hand pushing them hard enough to be stumble back into a lamp pole, hitting their back pretty hard. The man reached out to [y.name]'s trenchcoat's pocket and pulling out their purse then he ran away with their purse in hand.
"agh! what the- my purse?!" [y.name] yelled as they rubbed their back to ease the throbbing pain as they tried to run after the robber.
Unfortunately for [y.name] he was fast on his feet and after for a while they lost him. [y.name] panted as they decided to not give up yet and looked around the now lightless and eerie street, it seems like the robber ran into a more abandoned side of the city.
[y.name] roamed around the street and would peak occasionally inside of alleyways hoping to catch the man but much to their dismay, they haven't seen any glimpses or hints. They mindlessly walked around, slowly losing hope until they heard a quick shriek then a hard thump from a nearby alleyway. A cold sweat went down their neck as they froze in place... Did something happen?
[y.name]'s eyes narrowed down on the alleyway where they assumed the sound originated from. They contemplated for a bit whether they should check it out before they decided to see what it was, clinging on the possibility it might be their purse. [y.name] slowly peeked their head in the alleyway and immediately gasped at the sight.
The man who stole their purse on floor, wriggling in pain before a dark figure. Froth was coming out of his mouth as dark inky shadows circled around his throat. His ankles looked twisted but in a very unnatural degree that it looked grotesque.[y.name]'s eyes shakily looked at the soon to be a corpse then up to the figure who was holding their purse. They blinked blankly at the figure.. [y.name] recognized him?!
"Jin..woo?..." [y.name] murmured underneath their breath as the figure looked up to see [y.name] who was pretty shaken up. The light finally hits the figure's and it revealed it was indeed Jinwoo... but he had this soulless glint in his eyes that suddenly brighten up at the sight of [y.name]
"ah. [y.name]" He called out as he walked past the struggling man and approached [y.name] who took a step back away from Jinwoo. This made his heart wrench.
"don't. don't move away. it's dangerous at this time, you shouldn't be alone" Jinwoo continued as he was finally in front of a terrified [y.name]
"you shouldve accepted my offer walking you home"
#starz.babblez#solo leveling sung jin woo#solo leveling#sung jin woo#sung jinwoo#sjw#solo leveling x reader#sung jinwoo x reader#sjw x reader#yandere sung jinwoo#yandere sung jin woo#yandere solo leveling#drabble#I'd do a more messed up concept its just.... i cant write.... i can draw it tho 😈#also feed me too with yandere sjw pls pls pls#this is my contribution to the yandere tag#yandere
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More tactical cuddlebug? Please I beg of you
A/N: My my, so sorry for the late response it has been a hectic semester. Here goes nothing and I hope you enjoy it! :-)
[No beta we die like McTavish.]
TACTICAL CUDDLEBUG HEADCANONS
Despite their many years in the military, which meant few surprises for the team, you were still something they marvelled at when they think about you as an addition
You were a refreshing breeze to the stale air of their grey compound, and you began to rub off on them
Across the list of military personnel which they have met, you were the most "small"
By no means were you miniscule, but to them you just felt different
Most soldiers have a hard shell and an even harder personality, but you had a tough shell with a "squishy heart", according to Johnny
This observation led to various responses, such as a heavy urge to pat you on the arm, back or head
Johnny was quick to lean into it, even going as far as to squish your cheeks, enjoying your presence and damn near treating you like his favourite teddy bear
Once you joined him in his bunk to help with his crossword puzzle and he pulled invited you onto his blankets for better comfort, and Simon, who came to remind him of a briefing, walked back out the door the moment he opened it
Gaz was second to come to terms with enjoying the physical contact, and he loves to nudge you in the side and give you a side hug like a brother would
On his best days he would sit on the couch with you and read together, each of you on one end of the couch with your legs stacked comfortably like pick-up sticks
Price's affections came few but not rare, and somehow his eyes seemed a little brighter after a few pats your head, tucking away the memory of watching you lean into his hand
His hugs are the best when you bid him goodbye when either of you have separate ops to take on, and the warmth you get from his soul-crushing hugs are another high
Simon would engage with you more than Johnny if not for the fact that he was conflicted
He already hangs around you more than Gaz or Price which speaks plenty for itself
He was quiet and mostly helpless against this odd feeling of needing to be in physical contact with you, thus he cannot help but do it albeit he does so stiffly or roughly
He will needlessly grab your vest and aggressively tighten it "for your safety", followed by a heavy tap on your helmet before everyone settles into the flight
Johnny tells you during the ride that Simon cannot handle the fact that he is facing cuteness aggression and that he has caught Simon several times clenching his fist when he sees your mess of a collar to keep from fixing it
He was not quiet enough and received a hefty smack on the back of his heavy duty headgear from the man he mentioned
You think that they are all either as cuddly as they say you are, or that they are simply extremely touch starved people, for whom you have opened the floodgates to affection
The truth is, every single member of the team are cuddlebugs, but it has become a silent agreement that the title goes to and remains upon you alone.
#call of duty x reader#captain johnathan price#call of duty#duckscribbles#kyle garrick x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#johnny soap mactavish#johnny soap mctavish x reader
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HAMARTIA
MNDI +18, cw: oral (f!receiving), fem!reader ( i don’t think there’s much to warn :/ )
cw: 2.3k
bigger font as promised lol and not proofread sorry :/ my stomach hurts :(
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(i need my mouth on his abs. and hands it’s a need trust me. idk the cr please tell me.) it’s royaidni on X guys :> -i might buy patreon for him-
You swore this was the day that you’d kill this man as you tightened your hands around his thick neck. He smirked under his mask, you were strong. You were strong enough to take your anger out of him and knock him to ground when he asked for a fight with you. His words were taunting, irritating even as he did so which was something you happened to not like. You didn’t really knew if he was doing it on purpose. You suspected that he was trying to get the best of you.
And you were undoubtedly right.
He absolutely loved the way you clenched your fists when someone challenged you. He observed you long enough to know you wouldn’t say no to any competition. What a brave girl you are. “You… are weak.” he managed to choke out as you breathed rapidly. Oh how beautiful you were… From the blood dripping down from the edge of your lips to your heaving chest. You were a mess, he wasn’t easy on you, he knew what you were capable of, he knew if he let his guard down you could easily knock him down which was predictable and happened as soon as he froze for a moment. He froze because he couldn’t believe he really punched your precious face, because he couldn’t believe how pretty you were when you spit the blood pooled on your mouth and jumped on him like a lioness. He felt his whole body shivering underneath you, not daring to move away, not daring to do anything to ruin the positions of your bodies because Gott- your form rose heavenly on his stomach.
The angle was just right, he could see- nein, he could feel the way you looked down at him, was it another way of saying him he’s nothing different than a bug without words? Did you hated him enough to not even utter a word? That couldn’t be the case because he saw the burning lust in that gaze, felt it in his bones. It flowed into his skin from your palms around his neck.
“Said the man who’s about to die from my hands.” you snickered, breath coming out short and rapid. You felt a hot sweat rolling down on your spine as he chocked out a dry laugh. It was chocked because you had no intention of loosening your grip. “It would be a honorable way to die.” he finally got a hold of your wrists and pried your hands from his neck.
“But not today, Maus.” he lead your body down from his stomach to his crotch. Oh he loved the dumbfounded expression of your face, eyes going wide and lips forming a small ‘o’ shape. Because what was the thing poked your ass, you hoped it wasn’t his gun- or maybe you hoped it was. You were frozen and only remembered to get up when he tilted your chin up with his nose. You pressed your knees firmly against the floor to have the leverage to push yourself off of him. “Sit down.” he barked, both of you knew you could try more and eventually break free from his grip but you were a little curious thing. You wondered if he was really getting off from fighting with you. You were also curious when you accepted his challenge, wondering that König, the colonel who never talked with anyone unnecessarily but a few people, came to you on his own.
Did you loved to be on top? Or did you prefer to let your partner have the control? Would you like if he had you in a mating press and emptied his balls deep inside you until you break and cried for him to sop? Or would you prefer to ride him until he was overstimulated and panting like a dog?
These were the overwhelming thoughts he had every single night since he saw you kill a enemy which he claimed as his target. Along with 10 others. Your skin was hard, not squishy and soft like he was used woman to be. Your skin was scared from the bullets and sharp knifes. Your skin was tortured, beaten, overworked even. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to cause you any pain. The punch he landed on you made him want to cut his wrist off and feed it to dogs. You weren’t fragile but he loved how sensitive you were. Just like him, you weren’t so used to have someone so close and intimate. He could feel your heartbeat pick up as he pressed his clad lips on your pulse.
You were being oddly obedient and he loved it.
You we sitting on his lap like you weren’t choking him to death just a minute ago. You could be a witch or siren, whatever you name it, because there was no other explanation for your enchanting presence. He felt weak, for the first time in a decade he felt like he could drop to his knees and worship you like a temple.
You weren’t patient as you were strong. You wanted to feel him grow harder, you wanted to feel him as impatient as you so you could have him. So you started to grind your hips against his throbbing length, successfully drawing a growl from him. But not without a smack to your hips.
“Behave. I didn’t knew you were much of a slut. I thought you were just an arrogant brat.” he mumbled, not bothering to leave the confines of your neck. So you grabbed his hair with his mask and yanked his head back. “Are you going to fuck me or do i have to continue where i left of?” you hissed, wrapping your now free hand around his nack and getting irritated with his calmness. “Don’t wanna hurt you Maus, but you give me no other choice.” he purred yet there was irritation matching with yours, maybe even more. “Sometimes you forget who you’re talking to, and i’d be more than happy to fix that.” he pushed you back onto your back and you landed on the ground with a thud. You didn’t expected him to push you off after nuzzling you like a stray cat. You thought you had him in your palm, but he wasn’t like others. You were so shocked that you couldn’t do anything to stop him when he pressed on your torso and tugged down your pants. You wanted to kick him which you could with your current position but something primal in you prevented you from it. You wanted to let him put you in your place, you wanted to see if he could.
Now he was the one breathing heavily as he looked down at your exposed panties. The black ones, his favorite. He saw you in them one time, by accident if you believe. And since then he couldn’t get any sleep. He gritted his teeth, this was his lucky day. “Don’t move.” he retreated his hand from your torso so he could pull your panties with both of his hands. As he pulled down the fabric his hungry eyes drank every bit of skin that was being exposed to him. You thought he was doing it slowly on purpose, you thought he was teasing you for being touch starved but you just couldn’t notice how his hands were trembling and he was thankful that you didn’t noticed. “This wet from a little fighting and grinding? You’re pathetic. And i’m your colonel. Aren’t you ashamed? The strong soldiers everyone’s afraid of is getting wet for her colonel, i bet they would kill to see you.” his words hit just the right spot, it traveled through your veins and rushed your blood pressure. And of course that cocky bastard noticed that. How couldn’t he? His eyes were never leaving you!
But you wanted him to do more than looking, you wanted to feel his hands, mouth, tongue- god you wanted him all over you. “Oh look at that…” He parted your folds with his thumb and catched that glob of arousal dripped from you. “Do you need something in your pretty pussy? I got something you’d like.” he snickered, how needy you were… He’d never thought you would be so cute under him. You’d be hot of course but not that cute. He imagined every possibility but the way you covered your face with your forearm and the way you lifted your hips to chase his thumb never crossed his mind. “Give it to me.” your voice came out muffled by your forearm but he could understand you very loud and clear. “Nein Maus. You forgot to ask properly.” he dab his thumb on your clit, slowly and lightly. “What do you want?” he asked again and you knew it was your last chance. He never liked to repeat himself. You threw your head back when he licked your slit before you could answer. He swallowed thickly and pressed his fingers into your thighs. You had to answer before he lost his control and did something he would regret. “I…” you hesitated, he was your colonel but he was the one who offered all of this. You looked for your morals but they were no where to be seen when König was between your legs, looking into your eyes with his halfway lifted mask and your slick on his chin. “I want your cock. I want to feel you, i want you to fill me up until i am full of you.” oh your sweet voice, your sweet sweet words. “Braves Mädchen. That was what i wanted to hear.” he practically growled when he buried his fingers and face into your cunt. You gasped by intensity of both at the same time. His long and thick fingers dragged along your walls and curled just right as his lips wrapped around your sensitive bundle of nerves and sucked and lapped until your hips rose from the ground by his merciless attack. “Slow down!” you grabbed his hair to pull him away but you couldn’t use your strength due to his teeth gently grazing your clit. Your hips twitched and you could feel the overwhelming pleasure pooling within you, ready to explode with a poke. And the poke was his fingers hitting your g-spot. You pushed his head away- at least you tried but he didn’t left his place. His tongue lapped every drop you offered as you squirted all over him and the floor. “Mein, mein, mein.” he purred as he pulled his fingers out of your quivering hole and kissed your pretty pussy all over. Along with your strong thighs and throbbing clit. He sucked and licked your folds like he’s making out with your pussy. You were still twitching and trying to calm down after your intense orgasm. “König, enough.” you whined, your whiny voice strange to even yourself. Oh but did he love it. He’d kill to hear you whine and beg him again.
“I can’t understand what you’re saying, Maus.” he mumbled against your slick pussy and continued to lick until there was nothing left from your orgasm. He wanted it back. Not just your sweet slick, he wanted your sweet cum on his tongue. But he had to leave your pussy as his cock throbbed painfully in the confines of his pants. He straightened his back and that was when he could get a glimpse of your glossy eyes. His heart kicked his chest like it was trying to rip his skin and present itself to you. ‘Beautiful, pretty, cute, but mine, mine, mine.’ His twisted mind screamed as he hungry gaze drank the sight of you. You were just laying there obediently, for what? For your colonel to sink his cock into you and fuck the breath out of your lungs. He felt the globs of precum dripping from his slit to wetting his boxer. “Open your pretty legs f’me Maus.” he taunted, looking for a defiance or a little light of irritation in your eyes at his order but surprisingly you brought your hands under your knees and pulled your legs open for him. His whole body shuddered and he felt like he had been blessed by the god himself. His hands were erratic as he unbuckled his belt and fished his cock out. He hissed when his painful erection was finally free. He grabbed the base of his cock as he opened your folds with his long pointer and middle fingers. “You’re so ready f’me.” he breathed, you’d think he was talking to himself. He dragged his cock up and down on your slit until it was covered with your slick. You twitched and moaned everytime his tip kissed your clit. As he pushed the tip in he caressed underneath of your thighs and stopped under your knees where your hands hold your legs up and open for him. “Leave it to me Maus.” he softly pushed your hands and replaced it with his. You tried to breathe and loosen up for him but he was just so thick and it felt like he was splitting you open. Finally when he was fully inside you and filled you up like you wanted, you felt him pressing your thighs further into your chest. Your breath left your lungs when he snapped his cock out and inside you to the brim. He thought you couldn’t feel any better than engulfing him like a glove but when he left you breathless your walls clenched around him like you wanted to milk his balls empty.
After a few thrust your moans got louder and louder along with the clenching of your walls. "Scheiße Maus. If you continue to squeeze me like that-“ he grunted and picked up the pace. He felt like he couldn’t hold back anymore but he wanted you to cum with him. So he brought a hand between your impossibly flushed bodies and drew firm circles on your clit until you cum with a screaming of his name and he painted your walls with his relase.
-
a/n: please support me by reblogging, if you liked the content ofc <3 your comments also makes my day :* and i love to reply all of them :>
#silay#könig#konig cod#konig x you#konig x reader#könig smut#könig x reader#konig x y/n#könig fanfiction#konig smut#konig imagine#könig modern warfare#konig modern warfare#konig headcanons#konig x female reader
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&. LEE x yn.
lee type of bf :
- lee, contrary to popular belief...is just one big teddy-bear. he LOVES to cuddle. he lives for that shit.
- nights that you both spend in his truck are quite uncomfortable being squashed in the back together, except when you look at him and he is having the most peaceful sleep of his life.
- honestly, he won't admit it but you can see it on his face when he passes out and he looks so peaceful. he sleeps way better when he has someone warm to cuddle.
- he will randomly come up to you, whether you're laying in bed or on the couch and just crush you.
- HE CRUSHES YOU. he will just put his entire body ON YOU. sitting on the couch? cool he's on top of you now. laying in bed trying to sleep? get suffocated. he's on you. ALWAYS. he's just needy, have mercy :D
- he's also like a cat in a way. he wants to cuddle but only when HE wants to. but if you cuddle up to him in bed or on the couch he won't deny you.
- PLEASE crush him back. no matter your body weight (off topic head cannon but lee loves ALL body types. it doesn't matter. HE LOVES YOU.) CRUSH HIM BACK. he's sitting on the couch? get on top of him. he's laying in bed trying to sleep? suffocate him.
(he will never tell you directly when he wants cuddles, but you know how to recognize his puppy look)
- he enjoys spooning the most, that or laying his head on your tummy and laying between your legs. (bonus points if you have a squishy tummy)
- when you both are spooning he loves to shove his face into the crook of your neck and smell you. he's a weirdo.
- on the topic of smelling. he likes the way his partner smells. (HE'S BISEXUAL!! ITS CANNON!!) he likes to randomly smell your hair or your clothes. he thinks he's sneaky but he isn't.
- he also enjoys if his partner has like, long ish fluffy hair, mostly because he likes to play with it. as long as he can rake his fingers through it while cuddling you he's content.
- on the topic of hair HE LOVESS and i mean LOVESS when you scratch his scalp or massage his head and play with his hair when he cuddles with you.
- his ideal sleeping position consists of his face squished into your tummy, either you laying on your back or your side. (if you're on your side he is most definitely hugging your torso and squeezing you) he actually prefers to rest his head on your breasts, if his partner is a girl.
him smelling your shirt, and you playing with his hair.
- looks like he could kill you? he's a cinnamon roll.
- he's literally just a big baby. he enjoys being pampered. he doesn't look it but he does. he also will not admit it.
- likes to act hot and confident but he just wants your attention.
- ideally lee would like to sleep at night with just a t-shirt and his boxers...but if you're weirded out by that he'll settle for some shorts.
- on the topic of kissing be carful he does nibble. he can't help it. one second he's lightly kissing your tummy and then you'll feel his teeth. or he's kissing your neck and you feel his teeth. don't be scared though...he won't actually bite you or eat you. he loves you too much for that.
- if you're an eater too then he could ask you to go feeding with him. it's a very intimate thing between eaters and he wants to enjoy it with you.
(maybe just to be in charge to clean you once in the shower hehe)
- HE JUST LOVES PHYSICAL CONTACT SO MUCH PLEASE!!! (he'll never tell you)
- sometimes dirty minded and pervy, he can't help.
- let him lay his head in your lap and he'll die. babyyyy.
- speaking of him being a child. if he's having a bad day he will claim he wants to be left alone because he's emo but if you just persist and randomly cuddle up to him his eyes will literally turn into hearts.
- you'll just feel him shove his mouth on to your tummy and hear the farting noises...he's such a child.
- JEALOUS. I REPEAT, DEADLY JEALOUS.
(sorry for your lovers, but we both know how it's going to end)
- cooks you breakfast every morning he can.
- falls asleep looking at the stars with you, at the back of his pickup.
- if he's out he will leave a piece of paper on the fridge saying he loves you and listing the ingredients for you to cook.
- loves, literally LOVES to go on long trips with you on his blue pick-up. (especially mountain)
- professional studies (me) has deduced that he loves to be submissive, so he could literally lose control if you put yourself on top.
- loves to share cigarettes or oversized clothes with you. (sometimes even his boxers)
#timothée chalamet#timothee chalamet#timothee chalamet x reader#timothee x y/n#timothée x reader#bones and all#lee bones and all#lee bones and all x reader#&. LEE#&. LEE x yn#&. LEE x reader
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A little blurb based on this thought that I had
When You Accidentally Kill a Clown pt. 1
Pt. 2 Ao3
This is not ideal. Danny thought deftly as he stared in shock at the absolutely massive problem he had just created for himself. He blinked slowly, trying to bring his brain back to speed. Definitely not Ideal.
Not even one week in Gotham, that was all it took to make such a big mess, thank you very much Fenton Luck. Danny had been accepted into Gotham U, having qualified for practically a full ride scholarship, and started next week. He had been in town to get settled for about three days when he was walking back to his apartment from a nearby Batburger.
Unfortunately a certain clown mistook him for a Wayne and well… yeah, he needed help with this.
“Hey Danny what’s up?” Sam’s voice rang as the call finally connected.
“Sam I think I have a problem,”
“What? Your roommate’s too Hot?΅ she joked
“No- no it's not my roommate-” he squeaked out. Shit how would he explain this? Logically Sam would be perfectly normal about it, probably even ecstatic, considering he did just-
“I killed the Joker” Danny blurted plowing past the sputtering noises coming from the other end of the line, “I didn’t mean to, i was just walking back to my apartment and he jumped out of an alley and tried to kidnap me, and you know I hate clowns and he caught me off guard, and well humans are a lot more squishy than ghosts and I think I used a bit too much force, but yeah.” he paused for a breath, “I killed the Joker, At least I think it's him. Ancients, Sam the bats are gonna kill me for this”
The tinny laughter he got in reply did nothing to calm Danny’s fraying nerves.
“Sam don’t laugh what am I meant to do?’’ He hissed
It took a few more moments for Sam to collect herself before she responded. “I’m sorry Danny, that's just so you of you to manage killing the Joker your first week in Gotham. Holdup, I'm gonna get Tuck real quick.”
As the sound of shuffling and footsteps filled the receiver, Danny tried calming down. Breathing deeply he walked over to examine the body. Yep, he thought, definitely the Joker, that pasty face and greasy green hair were hard to mistake, even for a non-Gothamite. Danny wrinkled his nose at the acrid stench rising from the smoking crater in the clown’s gut. You can never be too sure though, so Danny reached over to check for a pulse. Nothing.
The distant bickering died down as Tucker’s voice rang from Danny’s phone.
“Duuue, did you really?”
Danny took a shaky breath, raising the device back to his face, “Y-Yeah, he’s dead,” God please don’t let him come back to haunt me. ”Tuck what do I do?”
“Honestly man, I think you should just leave him, someone will find him eventually,” Tuck replied, the nonchalance oozing through his voice.
“I don’t know, I feel like we should tell someone or something-”
“Holy Shit!” Danny froze at the new voice coming from behind him. “Is that really him?” Red Hood asked incredulously. Ancients that's THE RED HOOD. Danny is so double dead.
“Tuck, I think someone found out,” he whispered into the mic, not taking his eyes off the imposing Figure that was the literal RED HOOD.
“It’s probably fine,” but Danny cut him off with a strangled yelp as Red Hood turned to face him Muscles tensing, shifting from shock to Ancients Danny hoped that rage wasn’t directed at him. That hope slowly dwindled as the vigilante stalked toward him, hand drifting toward the holster at his hip. Danny gulped.
“Did you do this?!” Hood seethed, and Yup Danny was going to die again today. What should he say? ‘Yes mr red hood sir I killed the Joker please don’t kill me’ no, no he should not say that. So he settled to let out a strangled squeak and a small nod.
Danny couldn’t breath as Hood crouched to assess the body. I didn’t breathe when Hood stared him down. No Danny didn’t even breathe when a distorted laugh rang through the air, or when Tucker and Sam anxiously screamed at Danny to respond.
“I Can’t believe the Fucker’s finally dead,” Hood breathed, kicking the dead clown for good measure. “What’s your Name Kid?”
Finally Danny let a relieved sigh escape his lips, he Probably wouldn’t die again tonight.
“Um, Danny?” he said tentatively, his voice rising toward the end making it sound more like a question. Hood just laughed more.
“Well Danny, do you like burgers? I've got to thank you somehow.” Dany was in shock. What. the actual. Hell. slowly he nodded because what else was he supposed to do when RED freaking HOOD offered him food for killing a literal terrorist on accident. “Good, I have to make a few quick calls but don’t go anywhere.” and he walked a few paces away, leaving Danny in Shock and confusion.
Slowly he raised the forgotten phone to his ear. “Uuuuh Guys…” he waited a moment for the yelling to die down before continuing, yeah, this might be interesting.
#danny phantom#dp x dc#red hood#danny killed the joker#it was an accident okay#he forgot humans are squishy#oh god is hood going to kill him?#nope just take him for bugers and a milkshake#buckets writes things?
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Cool okay! May I request some general romantic head cannons for Bay! Optimus, Ironhide and Ratchet ? Thank you so much ! :)
(SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG! My internet is fucked, but only on my computer, so i'm struggling atm.)
OF COURSE!! My favorites.... I mean I totally love them all equally :) I wrote them with a Human!Reader (that's all i write but i just wanted to calrify)!
Optimus Prime:
My love... probably the most normal of them honestly
Isn't like super duper outwardly romantic when others are around. He isn't too fond of PDA. BUT he still shows affection in lowkey ways.
Like, he will gently nudge you if you seem anxious or off in general, to get your attention and when you let him know you're ok he gives you a slight nod and continues on with his conversation.
It's really no secret, because him crouching down and his giant hand descending from his side and nudging you is not very subtle.
He is way more protective over you than any other human. Will not let anything harm you. And if something does, nothing will get in his way to help/save you.
LOVES (when it's just the two of you) for you to gently hold his face in your tiny (compared to him) hands! Double points if you gently bonk your forehead against his.
If you are not feeling it, having a bad day, what have you, he will take you for a ride to calm down. his voice is so soothing! Sometimes he'll even talk to you until you fall asleep if that is what you need.
You two became an 'item' mostly because you had made offhanded comment to Cade about Optimus being attractive in a way and Cade shut that shit down immediately but Optimus heard. It was too late, Cade has to deal with this now...
Literally so sweet! Will kill for you!
Ironhide:
Oh my... definitely the least normal (in an endearing way).
Doesn't mind/completely understand PDA honestly. Like, you wanna grab him and nuzzle his face? Please do. He will be forever grateful.
He definitely wants to show you off, he is so proud of you!! He also needs everyone to know you are taken :)
Like he will do little things to make sure the others know he is with you, like bringing you towards him when someone gets a little too close.
Wants you close to him at all times, so he knows you're safe.
If anyone threatens you in any capacity (even if its sarcasm from a close friend) his arm is around you, guarding you, while he points a gun at the one threatening you. It takes a minute to calm him down.
If you are like visibly upset/anxious/not having it, he is very vocal about pulling you out of the situation. Has zero problems taking you away in the middle of a conversation.
Will literally go into alt mode and just... drive away with you. Your friends don't like that too much.
Ironhide definitely was weird about his feelings at first. Him liking a human? No thank you. Definitely tried to push the feelings away, until getting tired and telling you how he felt.
When you lit up and said you felt the same? Oh he was over the moon!
Very protective and secretly very sweet! Will also kill for you!
Ratchet:
My sweet cinnamon bun....
Will literally die for your hugs!! Please just wrap your arms around his neck when he bends down and hug him so tight!
Doesn't mind PDA (in a sense of like hugging and being sweet) but does get very flustered!!
Call him any pet name (honey, dear, etc.) and he will combust. If he could blush, he definitely would. Really wanna make him weak in the knees? Call him 'My love.'
Ratchet would worry about you constantly honestly. Waaay more than anyone else.
I mean, you're just a human! You're squishy and small. There is a lot to worry about!
He realized he liked you because he was so worried for you, then he grew even more worried!
He accidently confessed his feelings for you when rambling about how worried he had been for you, and when you go wide eyed he is retracting everything and ready to run away.
When you reassure him and tell him you like him too? He is even more likely to combust.
Is always wanting to check in on you, and learns very quickly what upsets you and what soothes you. he is very attentive.
So fucking sweet and will die for you!!
#transformers bayverse#bayverse transformers#ironhide#optimus prime#transformers#ratchet#transformers headcanon#optimus prime x reader#ironhide x reader#ratchet x reader
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Hi there! Can I request the gods fighting a reader who has a huge asset 👀 and during their fight, the god accidentally grope her chest. The reader then got flustered and slap him across the face. Bonus with Adam’s reaction. Thank you.
Gods - Thor, Loki, Hercules, Poseidon, and Hades.
-Many would think that having a large chest would be amazing, usually those were people with small or flat chests, but it was not all it was admired to be.
-Your back constantly hurt, you could barely find bras that were cute in your size, so you mainly just tied them down with a sarashi wrap; but the worst thing of all was being stared at, men gawking at you like you were a piece of meat and other women looking at you with envy.
-Whenever you had to fight, you always tied them down as much as you could, so they wouldn’t knock you off balance.
-Despite your ‘minor inconvenience’ you were a very powerful warrior, able to do toe-to-toe with some of the strongest warriors in Valhalla with ease; you just happened to get underestimated a lot, which was rather enjoyable for you.
-When you were announced as the next fighter, women cheered all around for you, as you were an inspirational fighter, as you fought back against men who thought they could touch you, just because you looked like the way you did.
-The men all cheered for more obvious reasons.
-The fight was intense, you couldn’t remember the last time you had a fight this challenging, it was so exciting!
-You dodged under his weapon, sliding up with your own and he swung out with his hand to shove you back and instantly he grabbed something rather squishy.
-Everything and everyone froze as you and he paused, both of you had turned white in pure shock before you let out a shriek and bitch slapped him across the face, sending him flying back.
-Thor- The normally stoic Thor was stammering, trying to explain that it was an accident as you lifted your bisento, bright red in the face, tears in your eyes, and fury surrounding you, “I’m not buying your excuses! You better take responsibility!” Loki was pretty sure he was going to die from laughing so hard, while Odin was trying to hide his own smile. Thor managed to grab your bisento, “I’ll take responsibility! I’ll marry you!” you were stunned but his sudden proposal as the crowd was quickly roaring with cheers.
-Loki- He had been knocked unconscious by your slap, stunning everyone by the power behind your fury. When he came to in the infirmary later, a red handprint still on his face, he was stunned that he had lost before immediately seeking you out, to one apologize and two- to ask you out on a date!! You were stunned when he sought you out with a bouquet of roses, asking you out on a date, willing to take responsibility for his accidental actions (or was it~?).
-Hercules- He had been stunned when he grabbed you by accident and tried to apologize, before you stunned him a second time by being able to bitch slap him head over heels away from you. He sat up, apologies falling from his lips like a mantra, ignoring his now bright red throbbing cheek as you were almost in tears. You ran off from the fight, too embarrassed and furious to think straight and Hercules was quick to rush off after you, to make sure you were okay.
-Poseidon- Zeus couldn’t breathe, seeing his stoic older brother so flustered as you leapt up with your bisento, he only barely blocked with his trident. Poseidon tried to reason with you, so he could apologize, as your anger was making you much more powerful. When you finally managed to knock his weapon out of his hand, holding your own blade to his neck, the tears in your eyes finally fell, making him gawk as you were announced the winner. He was quickly on his feet, apologizing profusely.
-Hades- His ears were ringing after your powerful slap, he almost felt like he couldn’t stand, but struggled to his feet, holding his head as you charged, “You better take some responsibility!!” you squeaked as he grabbed the pole of your weapon and was able to pull you into his arms, “I will, but first I must apologize for grabbing you. I meant to knock you back, not grab you. I am truly sorry.” His apology was sincere, so you accepted it as the match ended in a draw and he took you to the infirmary himself, so you could get the couple of wounds you had and so he could get some ice with his face.
-Adam- Anyone in the arena could hear the loud boss music that seemed to be playing, nobody knew where it was coming from. The god instantly paled, feeling someone glaring daggers into his back as he slowly turned, seeing a figure shrouded in darkness, with the only thing not being pitch black being a pair of glowing red eyes and a pair of brass knuckles on each hand. When your first tear slipped down your cheek, Adam attacked, “HOW DARE YOU GRAB MY DAUGHTER AND MAKE HER CRY?!?!” refusing to listen to any apologies as the two men ran out of the arena, one trying to kill the other. You didn’t care that you were announced the winner, spending the next several hours being comforted by Aphrodite who knew your pain well.
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The site of Jimmy’s grave was a bit more damaged then it had been before. There were craters all over the land from the wither- a damn wither, really Grian and Etho?
Cleo opened the chest that had been Jimmy’s makeshift coffin, pulled out the bit of rotten flesh she’d put in to represent him. She brushed the squishy lump off and lifted her shirt slightly, slapping the flesh back onto her torso. It was a wet sound, and she was kind of disappointed that no one else was around to be disgusted by that.
Cleo wondered how long after Jimmy’s death could she start calling herself a psychic for having him attend his own funeral on the same day that he did, in fact, die. She put a hand on the gravestone she’d made- poor bastard, she thought to herself.
There were footsteps behind her, and she turned to see Joel approaching her.
“Hello, Cleo.”
“Hi Joel.”
“What are you doing?”
“I was just cleaning up from the funeral.”
A silence fell between them. Cleo shot a look at Joel. He held his bow loosely in his grip, staring at the gravestone. Cleo did some quick mental math. Of everyone on the server, it really must have been Joel that had lost the most. His wife. His ally. Whatever odd homoerotic thing Jimmy and Joel had going on all the time. She had heard his screams of Jimmy and Mumbo’s names as they’d perished- they’d both died right in front of everyone. Anguished cries that no one even had the time to acknowledge in the chaos.
Cleo wanted to walk away. She really did- hell, she and Joel were on opposite sides of the spectrum at this point- he’d lost so many, and Cleo had her two idiot allies back at home, green and happy and alive. Why on earth would she possibly care about anyone other than her own allies?
She sighed. She didn’t walk away.
“I’m sorry, Joel, for your losses today.”
“Doesn’t matter- was bound to happen anyway.” Joel spoke in a deeply bitter tone, like he was trying and failing to spit acid.
“Alright, play the emotionally unavailable guy, see if I care.” Cleo did make to move away, but Joel spoke again, softer now.
“Why did they have to die, Cleo?”
“We all will, probably sooner rather than later, Joel.”
“But why them? Mumbo and Jimmy and… Lizzie.” Joel’s name caught on the word Lizzie, and his face crumbled. Cleo watched him as he stepped forward, putting a hand on the gravestone. “Could you leave this up, Cleo? It would be nice for… some people on the server to be able to visit every once in a while.”
Cleo decided not to tell Joel that she’d planned on leaving the gravestone up so she could gloat about guessing that Jimmy would die.
“Sure, Joel.” Cleo said, and her heart felt like it was twisting horribly as she watched Joel sag against the cold stone, hand pressed to the sign with Jimmy’s name. She walked forward, softly, and etched Lizzie and Mumbo’s names into the wooden sign.
“You… take all the time you need. Or anyone else who needs to… mourn.”
She took a few steps away, then stopped and turned around again. Joel was tracing the letters of Lizzie’s name now, over and over again. Cleo lowered her gaze and continued walking away- it felt indecent to watch.
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