#i would NOT like to live in another time period i would like to live in a tech optional society
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thank you for early june by the way and and also for being one of the like. three people total other than me who believe in transfem eridan
Look I do fully believe that the worst people among us can, with personal effort, attain goodness and greatness (becoming a transgender woman).
In all honesty I think taking transfem Eridan seriously is, I don't know, sort of important? In the face of March Eridan.
Lots of good ink has been spilled about the transfeminine femboy dichotomy and I don't think I have the ability to replicate the nuances of such things. But like, historically, there has been a category of person, assigned male at birth but feminine presenting to some degree or another, who exists not really as their own person, but instead as an idealized joke/sex object in the minds of men and other people who sexually exploit them. This figure, in the cisheteropatriarchal is a completely apolitical one. You can have sex with them and it doesn't count as gay. They don't have political demands, like "asking to be called women." They are a titillating deviation with no ability to harm the status quo. In today's terms, they are commonly given the dubious title of "femboy" or "trap", but if we look elsewhere, (I will be apologetically butchering the writings of transfeminist Thalia Bhatt) we can see this pattern of third-gendering in places across the world, with women like the feminiello in Naples, hijra in Inda, as well as others. A type of person assigned male at birth, presenting female, who has a particular gendered role in a binary-gendered society, that of being a usually disposable sexual object, occasionally given some light ceremonial or religious airbrushing to disguise the fact that such people are not a part of "normal", life. They are without an internal perspective, denied opportunities to live a life outside of a typically male sexual perspective.
But trans women? If someone is a trans woman, they usually have political demands, a desire for bodily autonomy, and the desire to actually be treated and referred to as women. And when a "femboy" turns out to have been a trans woman all along, well. Just look at how much everyone was talking about the streamer F1nnster when she was just doing a funny crossdressing bit for a person who paid her to do it, how many posts about "cis+ genderfuck crazy gender" versus when she actually came out as trans. This phenomenon works backwards too, with plenty of transfem sex workers having to tag their sex work as femboy to gain traction. There's a clear distinction here if you care to look.
I think Eridan dying in the story where she did was a good thing for the story (same with the rest of the Murderstuck deaths.) In a world with 5000 "fantasy racist learns to become lest racist" plots, having the fascist no one takes seriously Actually Follow Through and do the horrible things his ideology clearly incentivizes him to do is refreshing (also Hussie correctly predicting that the Harry Potter themed character would, in fact, be a fascist). But if one is to continue on, and have Eridan choose to deradicalize herself, then I think making her become a woman as she gets older is one of the only ways forward.
So. That's a lot of fucking words of transfeminism, and why the fuck am I applying to to Eridan Ampora, known dead fascist 13-year old fish from a webcomic? I'll admit it's a tad frivolous, but March Eridan, the fandom concept, flourished in that fun period of the 2010s where everyone was asking if traps were gay (got to hear that said by one of my high school friends, and I was out as a woman at the time.) Not to say it ever really went away, but, like, the whole joke (not putting this on Paige Turner, the original creator of March Eridan, this is just how the fandom ran with it) was just "hey look at this boy in a skimpy miniskirt and tube top and pigtails! Isn't this funny/a good excuse to draw a child barely in his teens in a sexy way?" Not like the fandom really needed an excuse, but I think, to a point, transfem Eridan is kind of the only way to go from there. Turn him into an actual woman. Put aside all the jokes, and make her transfemininity something you have to take seriously, something she has thoughts and feelings about!
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Just saw someone fighting for their life in the comments section of a Jikook tiktok (not even a “shipper” one, just one acknowledging that they’re close to one another), using all the usual Taekooker talking points (while insisting they’re not a Taekooker) but the main one they kept coming back to was their new favorite “they didn’t see each other at all during chapter 2, JK even said so!!!” Which is just so annoying because A, that’s not exactly what he said, and B, how to they think Jikook are able to have SO MANY inside jokes if they never see or talk to each other? The other members will stare at them in confusion as they just wiz through reference after reference, but nope they never see each other, no way! Any way sorry for dumping my frustration here, it’s just so annoying!
Hey anon.
It always gets me when people claim they aren’t shippers, yet their entire argument is built on shipper points. Just own it with your whole chest and keep it moving…no need for the pretense.
Nothing frustrates me more than seeing people say, “Jimin and Jungkook didn’t see each other throughout Chapter Two,” or “They didn’t meet for months or over a year,” because that simply isn’t true. In fact, we have concrete evidence that they saw each other every single month…and that’s just what we know.
Saying Jimin and Jungkook didn’t meet at all during Chapter Two is completely inaccurate because:
1. They never said that. At no point did either of them claim they hadn’t seen each other or specify how long they went without meeting.
2. We literally have proof of them spending time together…both alone and with others during the very same Chapter Two that people insist they were apart.
Jimin even mentioned discussing music with Jungkook over drinks. How exactly would that have happened if they hadn’t seen each other? We also know Jimin spent the night at Jungkook’s place before they traveled to shoot AYS in Jeju. Mind you, this was during the same Chapter Two when people claim they weren’t in contact. We also know that Vmin visited Jungkook’s house on the day Golden was released, and the three of them (Vminkook) hung out together. Again, this was during the very same Chapter Two when Jungkook and Jimin were supposedly not seeing each other.
Jungkook himself said that Jimin kept singing “Peuriri” to him so much that he was afraid he’d accidentally sing it on stage. Not only did we hear Jungkook say this, but we actually saw Jimin doing it on AYS in Jeju. So again, how did that happen if they weren’t seeing each other? Then we have the fact that they talked and made the decision to enlist together as buddies…something they obviously wouldn’t have even considered if they were not in contact and weren’t seeing each other. How does any of that fit with the claim that they weren’t meeting?
Honestly, I believe that most of the people pushing this narrative….who are mostly Taekookers know deep down that it’s not true. They just latch onto anything they can twist to fuel their arguments online, but even they don’t believe half the things they say. It’s just like on X where Taekookers constantly take screenshots out of context or use blatantly mistranslated texts to drag Jimin and Jungkook. And the wildest part? They know the real context. They just don’t care, because for them, it’s not about the truth…it’s about engagement, likes, and “winning” ship wars.
That’s why I sometimes don’t understand why some Jikookers even engage with them. Sure, we can clap back and put them in their place now and then, but honestly? Some of their takes are so laughably stupid that they don’t even deserve a response. Because how do you acknowledge that two people made a conscious decision to enlist together, support each other through one of the hardest periods of their lives, and still try to convince people that they hate each other?
How does it make sense to say Jungkook hates Jimin and was calling out his “fanservice” because he replied to Jimin’s comment playfully telling him not to comment when he is saying the same thing right next to him even though by saying this, Jungkook is the one literally telling us they are together, next to each other otherwise we wouldn’t know that information. And let’s not forget….Jungkook is the one who keeps letting us know that in his free time, he’s next to Jimin rather than spending it with other friends in the military.
How does Jungkook hate Jimin when he’s the one openly sharing details about how they spend their days together? He’s the one telling us how he goes to Jimin during personal maintenance times, hangs out with him, sings with him, showers with him, and stays glued to him whenever they get phone privileges. If this is what hate looks like, then I sincerely hope Jikook keep hating each other.
Do you see how none of this makes sense, anon? Yet these people will argue tooth and nail to defend a point that’s completely absurd. Sometimes, the best response to a fool is silence.
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Daylight this is me trying it’s obvious I know but your break downs are great
This was soooooooooo interesting anon!
youtube
So the story of the mashup is: This is me trying... to let it go.
(I love how gagged the crowd is when she sings that at the end lol.)
The first thing that jumped out at me after first listen is what she chose to include and what she cut out from both songs. She more or less cut out the bits about fighting and the self-loathing and self-blame, and what's left is a story of coming out of a dark period and coming into the (day)light (lol) and finding love amidst it. Which: wow, that sums up the last couple of years, huh?
Like, this is an entire story in itself, and I'm posting the whole mashup because I think it might be the best integrated medley I've heard so far in this trip down memory lane:
I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that Pulled the car off the road to the lookout Could've followed my fears all the way down And maybe I don't quite know what to say But I'm here in your doorway I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying At least I'm trying My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in Everyone looked worse in the light There are so many lines that I've crossed unforgiven I'll tell you the truth, but never goodbye I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night And now I see daylight, I only see daylight I only see daylight, daylight, daylight, daylight I only see daylight, daylight, daylight, daylight And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town And I can still see it all in my mind All of you, all of me intertwined I once believed love would be black and white But it's golden And I can still see it all in my head Back and forth from New York sneaking in your bed I once believed love would be burning red But it's golden Like daylight, like daylight Like daylight, daylight I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you And I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you And I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying and trying and trying And I wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying You gotta step into the daylight and let it go Let it go, let it go I just wanted you to know That this is me trying... to let it go, let it go
I think my favourite transition is "You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town / And I can still see it all in my mind" because that just HITS. 🤌 HER MIND!!!
When combined like this, the story feels like: someone having gone through a challenging time, yet clawing their way out of it and even amidst their pain trying to find their way out and find the good to keep going. And then emerging from that darkness to find the person that makes their world seem bright again after the darkness.
And that when they're away from that person, they're all they can think of, and all they want to do is run back home (to their bed lol), and that in spite of it all, they're going to try their damndest every day to make this work and hold into the light, even when the light feels elusive within them. In short, it's about not letting your past and your trauma steal the joy from your future.
This was really pretty anon! Thanks for pointing me to it!
(I think that's gonna do it for Mashup Madness tonight! I'll get to the pile of suggestions at another time so hold your horses.)
#Pouring out my heart to a stranger but I didn't pour the whiskey#Anonymous#surprise songs#mashup madness#miami n1#this is me trying#daylight#is this a safe space to admit eras made me appreciate daylight more lol#this is basically The Alchemy and SHS in piano ballad mashup form
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I tried to write my brain clutter coherently ...not sure if I succeeded.
Yes, words have meaning and I've defended them before like veiling when someone said a simple braid is a veil. Veiling has very obvious comparisons across all of recorded history and many religions and cultures; while it's intricacies will be different from one tradition to another all of them include covering the hair/head with something physical— not just a braid. Except perhaps 1 Corinthians 11:5 and 11:15 read side by side; but I doubt an eclectic neo-pagan was taking advice from chapter 11 of 1 Corinthians of all places.
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If you ask 5 different neo-pagan/polytheists what an altar is you'll get 5 different answers. If you look at multiple living religions shrines and altars have various different meanings, uses, and etiquette— but in all cases they are translations. This is the same in ancient religions. In ancient Levant it was often a raised platform where offerings and sacrifices would go; often an open air one on a hill top or mountain in earlier time periods; and often made of stone. In a temple it could be where the animals were slaughtered. In some traditions it might be on the floor. In others they are temporary and require it to be within a forest or near a body of water. Depending on the tradition a shrine vs altar might be understood as similar to the difference between the Catholic Tabernacle (where The God dwells in a sense) vs when the priest is blessing the Eucharist at the altar (when it is being used ritually). In other traditions it might be outside the inner sanctum, where the presence of the God within a cult statue resided, and instead be in an outer sanctuary or courtyard. Again, dependent on which ancient tradition** we are looking at.
[**Also brand new modern traditions within this sphere; like Wiccan altars vs Ár nDraíocht Féin altars; but when I say ancient tradition I'm referring to whatever religion(s) the Gods that a neo-pagan/polytheist worship come from e.g Zeus Ancient Greek, Odin Ancient Old Norse, Isis Ancient Egyptian etc. Especially because we are discussing history]
"Work with Gods" in a religious sense doesn't have much of direct translation into Greek or Sumerian, I doubt other ancient traditions have translations but I could be wrong there. The closest I can think of would probably be "preforming religious rites" or perhaps beneficial magic that invokes Gods which would be the job of professional medicinal-priests, exorcists, or magicians. I've seen neo-pagans use it for a myriad of different things: working magic by invoking Gods, treating themselves as equal to the Gods, treat the Gods as vending machines, self-help and development where they work with the Gods for guidance, or simply because they dislike the word worship. And probably many more. I've engaged with the debate before but that was probably pointless because of how vague it is. It's probably the vaguest term used at this point.
What defines "worship" is heavily dependent on the religion regardless of if its a new/revived one or living one. So trying to define it in an umbrella neo-pagan/polytheist space is fruitless. Unless you are describing one specific ancient tradition in which case it should be stated that "The ancient Greeks did X during worship" which that worship can be significantly different than many other traditions. I don't bow and clap my hands in a specific pattern before praying to the Theoi but I do before reciting Norito to Kami.
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Not to mention people in this umbrella community making posts defining these things rarely state which flavor of ancient religion/pantheon they are coming from (not always but often; and you can usually find out by going to their blog but the post itself is still addressing the umbrella community) so there is no historical basis given let alone linguistic connection to an ancient idea. And without that basis we are squabbling over English words and trying to apply them to traditions where those words might not even have equivalents.
So yes these words have history...only about 400 years of it. Unless we feel like tracing the etymology back but if the etymology only goes back to Latin which we could then reconstruct a PIE language word.... it seems silly to do that if we are talking about Ancient Sumer or Ancient Egypt which neither are Indo-European.
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In Shinto a Kamidana can sort of be translated to home shrine, its where the Kami resides and where offerings are presented which some would claim is the essentials of an altar— but it's not a good idea to translate it at all imo, its usual translation is "god shelf" when explaining Shinto practices. Kami being translated as Gods is not entirely accurate and can substantially misrepresents what Kami might be.
Some neo-pagan/polytheists see devotee as a step above simple worshipper. Meanwhile "devoto" is literally the lowest "rank" in Dominican Vudú, one that cannot work with the Misterios or communicate with them. There are also other terms for individuals such as Servidor/as, Brujo/Bruja, Papa Boko & Mama Mambo. They can be translated into an English words but it often loses meaning and context requires a paragraph to explain.
I've also explained before that "Mary Worship" can be fundamentally offensive and "Marian Devotion/Veneration" is the preferred term. This is based on Ecclesiastical Latin's definitions of dulia, hyperdulia, and latria. It takes at least a paragraph to explain these and express why in English "Devotion/Veneration" is okay but "Worship" absolutely isn't okay.
So if living traditions have trouble expressing themselves fully in English it logically follows that using English words to describe ancient traditions is going to be an even more vague approximation of what the practice meant. Especially since there is a break in continuity.
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the words they used still have connotations and meanings
This proves my point— they had words that had meaning. None of those words were: altar, shrine, work with, worship, devotee, worshipper.
The people who worshiped the pantheons neo-pagans/polytheists take from did not have those words. Like veiling—covering the head with something—we can glean a basic understanding of how these words are used generally. Like an altar: it is generally a spiritual thing, often to do some spiritual practice, like magic or meditation etc; or offerings of various types; or interact in some way with spiritual beings (gods spirits ancestors etc); or to give the spiritual being a "home"/"space"; or some combination of those. But precise definitions outside the context of one ancient tradition aren't feasible. And especially splitting hairs between the word pairs in my original post (like shrine vs altar) and trying to force those distinctions on the umbrella neo-pagan/polytheist community is even less useful and frankly annoying.
So if one would like to define a word thats relevant to their practice and write a post defining explicitly what it is: pick the word in the language of the original pantheon or write the post with the "how I use the term" approach without implying their approach is the best.
If I type in altar into ePSD (Sumerian) I get 2 results, I type in shrine I get 18 results— I'd much rather see posts exploring the ancient traditions behind those words (or more likely ancient Greek words in my case) than see one more neo-pagan/polytheist try to define what English "altar" versus "shrine" should mean for all of us.
IMO the umbrella community needs to stop attempting to define English words for ancient traditions and ancient pantheons and assert that their interpretation is the most accurate one. I have my own concepts of sacred space, altar, shrine, worship, being a devotee etc. And they're probably different than plenty of other neo-pagans/polytheists; and they have changed over my religious journey. I'm using English words not Ancient Greek or Ancient Sumerian words to describe those things, so my definitions are inherently modern, based on an amalgamation of ancient ideas (or "requirements"), but modern nonetheless.
In other words, I completely stand by what I said originally.
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Also... paleopagans don't have any records so how on earth would we know? I looked it up and apparently it means like pre-Hellenistic religion and pre-Roman imperial religion, not Paleolithic spirituality. Which okay I guess paleo just means "old," but paleo is used as a prefix for a lot of things related to Paleolithic academic studies so I find the usage strange. Whatever floats someone's boat though I suppose.
Can this religious community stop trying to define words for each other. Unless a word has a historical meaning, like miasma, or melam, or whatever. I mean like shrine vs altar, work with vs worship, devotee vs worshipper in relation to neo-paganism and recon/revive polytheism. Y'all realize none of them used English, the words being squabble over, right.
Like just....... can we not.
I'm seeing it everywhere and I hate it.
#reblogresponse#also sorry i didnt use sources especially in like the levant altar paragraph but im exhausted
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Hooo boy. Oh no. We're going down the rabbit hole of Shinji Hirako's hairstyle choices and what they mean, people. Buckle in.

So, this has been bugging me for a while, but oh my gawd, we need to get the story straight on Shinji's freaking hairstyles. Because I care far, far too much about this and need to get it off my chest.
Why do I care so much about this? Well, I have a degree in Japanese. And another in Japanese pre-modern history. And I used to live in Japan. And I went to a Japanese university, and uh...
Yes, I'm wasting my education. Moving on.
So what's the deal with Shinji's hair? Let's start with his TBTP arc hair, which is CRAZY. Oh my god.

In Bleach Tankobon #71, Chapter 652, we get this short flashback from Nanao with a surprise Shinji cameo. Please ladies, take note: Aizen may appeal to the common, everyday fangirl, but we Shinji stans are RARE and WE HAVE TASTE.

(Kubo not giving this chick page time is a CRIME, I tell you. I see you, girl. You're a woman of culture.)
Anyway, we can see from the dialogue that even in the Soul Society, home to Captain Kyoraku wearing ladies kimono around, Captain Unohana's front braid, and Mashiro's green hair, Shinji is regarded as weird. Some of that is undoubtedly referring to his personality, because Shinji is absolutely a weirdo, no question. He'd tell you himself. But his hair is somehow memorable, even when a number of male captains currently wear theirs long as well.
It's long in back, with slightly shorter locks in front, and then bangs.
Okay, you say. That's just a hime cut, right?
Well. Sorta. But also no? Listen, I have no idea what Kubo was thinking (obviously), so it's entirely likely and possible this was just what he felt like drawing, subtext be damned. You know, like that time he drew powered speakers in 1891.

Kubo, I love you, but you give historians like me the hives sometimes. That's clearly a 1970s style powered speaker.
And we know it's 1891 because Bleach started in 2001 and Kubo flat out admits it's 1891 on the little omake after that chapter.

Jazz started in the late 1890s Kubo, I'll give you that one: https://www.bbc.com/travel/article/20120224-travelwise-the-birthplace-of-jazz
*squints*
Are - are those BAKELITE HEADPHONES?!? From the 1960s?!? In 1891?!?

*rage-gargling noises of a suffering historian*
ANYWAY. HAIR.
So here's the thing. A lot of modern hime cuts DO have bangs:

But they also usually tend to have much shorter front locks, usually chin length.

Some even do little multi-step cuts, but you can see how short they tend to be. Shinji's is much longer, and technically back then, the modern "hime" cut didn't exist yet. So what the hell is he wearing?
He's doing a popular noblewoman's Heian era hairstyle, which often involved leaving the long hair loose or arranging it over the shoulders or in a long tail. When a girl reached the age of 16, she'd have a ceremony called "binsogi" (鬢削ぎ) that cuts the hair around her ears shorter like seen above.

This painting of Murasaki Shikibu done by Tosa Mitsuoki (土佐 光起) in the 1600s shows another good example.
So this leaves us with three things about this already that might be making those academy students think he's a weirdo:
Shinji's not a woman, and that's pretty clearly a woman's hairstyle. Cross-dressing was absolutely a thing back then, but it was generally done head-to-toe, not just a woman's haircut with men's clothes.
The Soul Society is pretty clearly based on Edo period Japan, and NOBODY WORE THEIR HAIR LIKE THIS THEN. It would be like you walking around with a beehive or a wimple in the 1990s. People would ask you what costume party you were going to.
Shinji is pretty clearly not a noble. His name, "Hirako" (平子) includes the character 平, hira. One of the kun readings for that kanji is literally "common" (Hiyori actually pokes fun at this in the manga). Kubo has been shown to be pretty deliberate with names and mannerisms, and not only does Shinji have "common" in his name, he has a commoner accent - Osaka-ben, which is often seen historically/stereotypically as somewhat crude, lowbrow, and associated with merchants (whom the nobility hated for reasons I'm not going to bore you with here).
So, not only is he wearing an outdated super feminine hairstyle, he's almost poking fun at the nobility by imitating their style as a commoner.
But wait. There's more.
Because see, every single example I can find of Heian era noblewomen hair just DOES NOT INCLUDE BANGS. Bangs are absolutely a thing in Japanese hairstyles, but they're almost invariably swept back and pinned with a comb, not left down on the forehead.

This is a lovely example from this book, which is pretty awesome and I highly recommend it: Amazon link, but it's not an affiliate, I don't do that.
So wait a second, you say. I can see that middle one on the right. What's that one?
Well, here's where we get off into the weeds, because I don't think Kubo INTENDED this (or maybe he did, he's a massive troll), but this theory amuses me immensely.
See, that's a kamuro haircut. A kamuro is a young girl between 5 to 9 years old that is a courtesan in training to a very high ranking courtesan. (There was eventually a rule codified in the Yoshiwara pleasure district that high ranking oirans could have two kamuro and mid-tier could have one.) The girls wore their hair like that while it was growing out long enough to be able to style in an updo.

Now, this hairstyle is too short in back to be what Shinji's wearing. But it's also the only style I can dig up that had any kind of bangs at ALL during the Edo period (as far as I can determine, bangs just were not a thing in the Heian era.)

So Shinji is either wearing the outdated noblewoman's hairstyle WRONG or he's added the bangs to remind people of a kamuro hairstyle. Which is extra weird, because he's not the right age or gender, and he's not an oiran's attendant. He could also be imitating something from the world of the living at the time, but the length of his hair and shorter front locks tends to disprove that; that is VERY much a Heian style.
So yeah, he's absolutely, positively messing with people from the get go here. Like, this is peak Shinji Hirako going, "I'm going to deliberately come off as weird just so I can gauge how you react and see what kind of person you are by your reaction to me."
Except here's the thing. He later cuts his hair while in the world of the living, right? And this bothers me immensely because everybody, including the Viz translators, refer to it as a "bowl cut".
No. This is a bowl cut.

It's literally a home haircut for guys you get by slapping a bowl on your head and cutting around it against the rim of the bowl. Shinji doesn't have a bowl cut, and neither does Soi Fon, and the original Japanese was making a joke about a kappa that they didn't bother to translate.

This is a Yokai called a kappa, btw. They have an indent in their head they keep water in. Hiyori was just finding another way to call Shinji hideous, basically.
I've seen some people call it a pageboy.

Noooooo. It's naaaaaawt a pageboy. He's wearing a bob.

Okay, semantics. Point is, he's STILL wearing (traditionally speaking) a woman's hairstyle. We don't know how many hair revolutions he went through in the last 100 years, but you have to be supremely confident, because it can be difficult to pull off, regardless of gender.

(Seriously, some guys look amazing with bobs, especially when the lines are less severe and chopped.)
Also, Shinji appreciation time, because you either pull off those straight bangs or you don't. It is, as Tim Gunn says, "A lotta look."

But hang on, hold everything. When did bobs even show up in Japan?
Whelp. Actually quite a bit earlier than you'd think. Here's a postcard from the Meiji era:

HANG THE FUCK ON ARE THOSE KAMURO AGAIN?
Yep.
So it's entirely possible he's leaning on this weird imagery to further unsettle people, but having a haircut similar to a child attendant is a wee bit squicky and I don't think that's honestly what was intended.
So what was Kubo going for here?
Well, the bob came to Japan around the 1920-1930 period, along with jazz, and it was an iconic hairstyle for women, particularly for the "Modern Girl" or "moga" (and the bob was called a moga, the association was so strong).

You can read more about this cool Kiyoshi Kobayakawa print, "Tipsy", here.
You know what was really popular in Osaka, even after it started getting censored in Tokyo as WWII picked up?
Jazz.
You know who loves Osaka and jazz?
Shinji Hirako.
I'm not going to rant about this right now, I have a whole other post about Shinji and wartime jazz.
I honestly think by the time Kisuke figured out how to fix the Soul Suicide issue with the Vizards that it was just getting to be the jazz age. They would have had to move around quite a bit, since Aizen was actively looking for them, and Shinji in particular (in fact, in the manga he specifically only calls out Shinji. Aizen just DOES NOT LIKE his former Captain, but he also respects the guy enough to be concerned about him being a loose cannon.) So they might have been in Osaka for a while instead of Tokyo, where Karakura is located. (It's not a real place, but Kubo has addressed it.)
I think Shinji stuck with his thing of wearing women's haircuts and got a moga bob right around the time the jazz age was picking up and he knew he was going to live long enough to get a shot at Aizen. And I think he just stuck with it, honestly. Our boy was rocking a Heian hime for DECADES after it had gone out of style CENTURIES before. He's not going to change up everything on a whim (though I think he started fucking with his bangs purely to enhance the weird confusion of Sakanade's reversing sight.)
Also, since Hiyori's rampage sliced off part of his hair already, he'd have gotten a haircut asap to fix that, once he wasn't in any mortal peril. Our man likes to be stylin'.
Have this fun compilation of 10 decades of women's hairstyles in Japan. You've earned it.
#bleach#shinji hirako#bleach shinji#vizards#hiyori sarugaki#bleach manga#Oh god this was SO LONG I'm so sorry
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#so all the joann stores are closing#and we live by a big busy one#and bc theyre getting more busy with the liquidation sale#they're hiring short term employees#my sister is going to interview#she sews and gets most of her fabric from there and shes 16 and this would be her first job#ok great#i think it would be a good opportunity for me#to at the very least have a paycheck for 2 months ?? ish#while i keep looking for something else#but she doesn't want to work with me#theres another store but idk if they're hiring bc theyre not nearly as busy#and i understand why she doesn't want me to . but like. come on#we could get different schedules so she wouldn't have to work With me#she said i wouldn't have wanted to but actually i think i would have welcomed the idea of working my first job with my big brother#hes older and knows what hes doing and can help me and be someone i know#she said i wouldn't have wanted her to start working at my first barnes and noble job. maybe ?#but its different when your little sister is following you lol#she says she just wants to do something on her own and i understand and im trying not to upset her or make her uncomfortable#but shes Telling me not to apply#and. respectfully. i dont think she understands my pov as much as i understand hers#im not 16 years old looking to get my first job for the ~experience~#im a 21yo woman trying to move out of my parents house whos been unemployed for the better part of a year and a half#i NEED money. point blank period literally. im never picky with what i APPLY to. i apply to everything#if theyre desperate for some temporary part time employees then i have a good chance of getting hired#and then I'll have a little bit of money!!!! which is better than nothing!!!!#im trying to be understanding and accommodating but she doesn't understand what its like to NEED a job#she doesn't NEED this job. she wants it#which is good for her and i want it for her but like !!! cant i at least work different hours!!!#ig ill see if the other store is hiring first but i dont have a good feeling about that
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regarding the gun post, i really do not know very much about guns (aside from going to a range a couple of times) but i know at least a little bit about the physics of guns just out of personal interest and because of my grandfather explaining it to me. that's not "knowing about guns" as much as just being interested in technical stuff. though he's a gun owner he's not a big gun nut, just an engineering nerd, he explained internal combustion engines or bike gears or model airplanes, etc the same way. that probably had an influence on child Cal's interests hahaha
#cal txt#i've posted about him a few times recently but it's because i've kind of been going through another period of thinking about how grateful#i am to my grandparents for their role in raising me esp when i was very young. for sure i have posted several times about some pretty bad#experiences with my parents but i was saved from that by my grandparents in a very real way. until i was 9 or 10 i was with my grandmother#after school five days a week. as usual the more you inspect the nuclear family model the more you might realize it doesn't actually#describe your experience very well. like at school events where they wanted a parent to come it would often be my grandma!#i mean when i was born my mom did still live with them.
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oh my god. a manga where everyones actually wearing masks???
edit: NEVERMIND jumped the gun here it was just for one scene cos they were at a nail salon 😭
edit 2: hmm actually. depending on how recently this manga was drawn it could just be reflective of how not everyone wears masks. the customers are wearing masks in the salon but outside usually not but Sometimes. they are
edit 3: I WAS RIGHT??
#in an era where i feel like there was a VERY short period (in western fandom at least)#where masks and covid were even mentioned in fic and art#before it dropped off completely and all fiction lived in a fantasy universe without covid...#BRO I GOT TRICKED#hmm iirc wearing a mask in japan isnt required outside anymore. so that would track#but also maybe the artist just didnt want to draw masks all the time LMAO#ok ill be honest at this point i think i just misread the situation 😭 man it would be interesting for someone to like.#draw masks all the time..... the elusive artist that likes to draw masks more than faces#i should practice drawing people with masks...#MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE LMAO#ok now im Really sure its just a case of wanting to show the main characters faces and not wanting to draw masks all the time#two characters have met outside for the first time and theyre both wearing masks#ok theres another bit where a character says 'good thing the flights are running again'#which i must assume is a reference to international travel being restricted at the beginning of covid#so wow.... i was right..................#idk when this was released but it must have been drawn closer to the beginning of the pandemic#the manga is internet love by urino kiko btw#hmmm it says released 2023.. thats the tankobon tho idk if it was serialised and when that happened#ok yeah serialised from late 2022... thats quite far into the pandemic actually. interesting
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me, the symptoms experiencer, experiencing symptoms: wow gee i wonder what the fuck is happening right now i have no context for why i could possibly feel bad, surely i'm not experiencing symptoms. me, when i figure out it's the symptoms:
#gif warning#medical stuff#man getting labled as a hypochondriac at a formative age (any) was a hell of a kick to the balls#i don't even have those#and yet#me when i've been told all my symptoms can't be real and that i was makign it up for attention so i started just not talking about them#even though in private without anyone around i was still experiencing the symptoms i decided i just Wasn't#because why would my parents be wrong about that - they loved me right?#so if something was concerning they'd be worried if it was a real thing - i wasn't making it up but maybe i was#no one should have taught my father the term psychosomatic#he's the reason it's had to go up on the shelf#mom flat out telling me it was impossible that [redacted] because i was quote ''too young'' for it to be happening#so now i'm old and it's a Real Big Fucking Deal I guess#i'm experiencing the flare/crash i was anticipating and - thank fuck - my brain isn't going down the tubes with it#which is a fucking miracle because this is the lead up to my period and *normally* that's when the PMDD hits real fucking bad#but in a stroke of luck (???) my body decided it was just going to smash itself into the ground Krillin-style#and as i lay here in the crater of my own body's making i'm just like. well at least i don't want to die#which is truly the most throwing thing of everything actually#anyway....#got hEDS put on my medical file for reals though so like#that's in there#that exists#also the look of HORROR on the nurse tech's face when i showed how much distance my hips spread *every month* for my period#i'm LITERALLY going into labor monthly and i've been doing that since i was 11#no fucking WONDER my body has collapsed out from under me if we even just go by that fucking metric like godDAMN#ugh anyway.... i'm. this was NOT the stuff i wanted to focus on this year for personal growth and healing but we're doing it now i guess!#fuck! goddamn! piss in a cup#i have also... failed to do the task i was meant to today and technically there's still time but it's uh. i. i'm gonna need to ask for help#and i HATE asking for help especiallywhen i need it most#another thing my parents have to answer for when they greet whatever judge they find at the end of their lives
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I made a star wars high republic playlist -
I imagine the high republic era aligning with the golden era of hollywood, like if you view the original trilogy as a product of the 70s-80s, and the prequels as the 90s/early 00s, the high republic era is the "golden age" of the jedi, so wouldn't it make sense? the high republic takes place 200 years before all that so its not similar in proximity but I like the idea of star wars having a art deco or gatsby look to it, especially with all the gold motifs on the temple robes and starlight beacon.
also with all the references to elzar and stellan looking like holodrama actors i feel like it works.
let me know if i should expand on that.
#star wars high republic#thr#star wars#avar kriss#bell zettifar#elzar mann#stellan gios#vernestra rwoh#reath silas#cohmac vitus#indeera stokes#kantam sy#star wars thr#high republic#OK YES ELVAR GIVE ME OLD HOLLYWOOD DRAMA VIBES OK#also like if they ever do an adaptation in animation or live action i feel like it would need another element to separate it time wise#i just think the amount of parties jedis go to in this period is insane#Spotify
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btw I saw my old crush today
#i think#he lives in the building next to me and i was in the car buying vegetables in the road next to his building#and i THINK it was him i saw him walking#i was staring really intensely to try to figure out if it was him and then suddenly he looked my way and i immediately lookwd away lol#i don't feel anything except maybe aw wish i could ask him what he's upto if he's happy#crazy to think that this time last year i couldn't stop crying because he had just left work wow#so much has changed since then#i can't believe I left work because he (and two of my other friends) left and i felt too unbearably lonely there#i think i want to. hug someone. but my sister is in another country and my bestf is in another city#and still hasn't replied to my text asking if she'll come home this month because im here#fuck you random wave of sadness#i know im pmsing but it's so irritating because every time i pms and then I don't get my peruod because fucking pcod i guess#and then like 10 days later i have a super big breakdown over something stupid and then i get my period#like once a month wasn't enough????? end this torture#i wish i was okay with doctors and surgeries and stuff i fr would get my uterus removed or whatever it is rhey do to stop periods
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modern technology on the whole is blursed. very difficult these days coming to terms with how much i prefer not looking at a screen whenever possible
#prazardous#social media#internet culture#i would NOT like to live in another time period i would like to live in a tech optional society#tech solves so many problems while creating so many new ones#modern technology#blursed#yes i am chronically online yes i hate having social media we exist !!!!!
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wait, Derin how did your leaving make the hospital shut down?
I used to work as a live-in nanny for a pediatrician.
Now, the thing about hospitals in my country is that they are massively understaffed and massively underfunded. This is especially true outside the major cities. The staff are worked to the bone and receive little to no help in things like finding accommodation or childcare, making working in rural areas a very uninviting prospect; staff come out here, get lumped with the work of three people (because there's nobody else to do it), burn out under the workload and leave, meaning that those remaining have even more work because that person is gone. It's unsustainable and the medical staff are doing their best to sustain it, because people die if they don't, so to the higher-ups it looks like everything's getting done and therefore everything is fine.
My friend (and boss) worked one week on, one week off, swapping out with another pediatrician. This was necessary because it would not be physically possible for one person to handle the workload for longer periods of time. The one single pediatrician had to hold up the entire pediatrics ward, which was not only the only public hospital pediatrics ward in our town, but also the one that served all the towns around us for a few hours' drive in all directions. I regularly saw her go to work sick, aching, tired, or with a debilitating 'I can barely make words or see' level migraine, because if she took a day off, twenty children didn't get healthcare that day, and some of these kids' appointments were scheduled weeks in advance. She'd work long hours in the day and then be called in a couple of times overnight for an hour or two at a time (she was on-call at night too, because somebody had to be), and then go in the next day. Sometimes she would be forced to take a day off because she physically could not stay awake for longer than a few minutes at a time, meaning she couldn't drive to work.
Cue my niece's second birthday coming up in Melbourne. I'd been working for her for about 3 years, and she (and the hospital) had plenty of advance warning that I (and therefore she) needed one (1) Friday off. That's fine, we'll find someone to work that Friday, the hospital said. Right up until the last week where they're like "oh, we can't find a replacement; you can come in, can't you?"
No, she tells them; I don't have anyone to watch my kid that day.
Oh, surely you can hire a babysitter for this one day, they say. Think of the children! We really really need you to work that day. I know we said it'd be fine but we need you now, there's no one else to do it.
There are no other babysitters, she told them. Unless you can find one?
That's not our responsibility, they said.
But I'm not changing my plans, she's got plans by now as well, the hospital knew about this one day weeks in advance, and with absolutely no reserve staff they're forced to reschedule all pediatrics appointments for that Friday. Not a huge deal, it happens on the 'physically too overworked to get out of bed' days too. I go to Melbourne, she goes back to her home in Adelaide for her recovery week, all should be on track.
My niece gives me Covid.
This was way back in the first wave of the pandemic, and there were no Covid vaccines yet. The rules were isolate, mask up, hope. I had Covid in the house, and it would've been madness for my friend and her toddler to come back into the Covid house instead of staying in Adelaide. There was absolutely no way that a pediatrician could live with someone in quarantine due to Covid and go to work in the hospital with sick children every day. And no support existed for finding another babysitter, or temporary accommodation, so the hospital was down a pediatrician.
The other pediatrician wasn't available to do a three-week stint. They were also trapped in Adelaide on their well-earned week off.
Meaning that the only major pediatrics ward within a several-hour radius had no pediatricians. They had to shut down and send all urgent cases to Adelaide for the week. To the complete absence of surprise of any of the doctors or nurses; of course this would happen, this was bound to happen, it presumably keeps happening. But probably to the surprise of the higher-ups. After all, the hospital was doing fine, right? Of course all the staff were complaining of overwork and a lack of resources in every meeting, but they could always be fobbed off with the promise of more help sometime in the future; the work was mostly getting done, so the issue couldn't be too urgent.
It's not like some nanny who doesn't even work for the hospital could go out of town for a weekend for the first time in three years, and get the only public pediatrics ward in the area shut down for a week.
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possibly tmi but why tf does the body smell like it's on its period. we don't GET periods anymore the T and birth control basically eliminate it
#bc we NEED them eliminated bc they're genuinely debilitating#heavy flow to the point of dizziness (but ONLY on the first two days?)#cramps so bad we physically cannot walk like one day at school we had to be put in a wheelchair just to get to the nurse#bad pmdd symptoms#also we just. don't have the money in this household to keep up with buying all the stuff for that#not having to buy pads anymore bc i started BC at the same time as my mother started menopause#took a pretty sizeable chunk out of our living expenses#also i ruin clothes far less now#also our periods were Too Frequent#like the tracking app we used to use actually would yell at us that we were logging it too soon#like 'you're not due for starting this for another week! are you sure this is right?' YES im sure im literally SEEING IT RN#now we don't use tracking apps bc of government creepiness. paper calendar or vague as possible on phone calendar will do#haven't had a cycle since january tho since we got the arm implant#and we've only had the implant for less than a year (got it last december) so we shouldn't have to change it for 2 more years at the least
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story time :)
#mädch rambles#something weird is happening in our apt i think skdfjlsdjf#so there was this couple that lived in the apt above us when we moved in and we thought they were pretty nice#the girl was a bit quiet not as nice as her bf he was really friendly with us but yeah they lived above us and they were honestly quite lou#like their footsteps (we found out it was actually the girl haha) were SO loud and we always knew when they were home#and their bedroom was right above ours and they had an old creaky bedframe so every time they would move my bf and i would but up all night#lol ANYWAYS so a couple months ago we found out that the broke up and that the bf was going to move out (he texted us) so ya know it's just#been the girl up there and we knew she had been living there after he moved out for a couple months but i would say for maybe the past 3#weeks we have not heard her at all and we haven't gone on like any big trips for long periods of time but we think we still see her car out#in the parking lot but it hasnt left the lot and we have been seeing this new blonde girl coming in a few times but we dont know where she#comes or goes from and ALSO there is this new red truck in our lot that has not moved at ALL and my bf works from home and he never sees it#leave so we are skeptical if she moved out but we haven't heard anyone move in or out so im like lowkey kinda concerned ....#and ALSO another random incident just the other day when we came back from eating out like a few days ago the police were near our apt and#we asked if it was for our apt just to make sure and they said no but they didn't know where the 'emergency' was so like IDK things have ju#t been WEIRD LATELY YA KNOW i'm just so tempted to text our landlord :')
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playing science telephone
Hi folks. Let's play a fun game today called "unravelling bad science communication back to its source."
Journey with me.
Saw a comment going around on a tumblr thread that "sometimes the life expectancy of autism is cited in the 30s"
That number seemed..... strange. The commenter DID go on to say that that was "situational on people being awful and not… anything autism actually does", but you know what? Still a strange number. I feel compelled to fact check.
Quick Google "autism life expectancy" pulls up quite a few websites bandying around the number 39. Which is ~technically~ within the 30s, but already higher than the tumblr factoid would suggest. But, guess what. This number still sounds strange to me.
Most of the websites presenting this factoid present themselves as official autism resources and organizations (for parents, etc), and most of them vaguely wave towards "studies."
Ex: "Above And Beyond Therapy" has a whole article on "Does Autism Affect Life Expectancy" and states:
The link implies that it will take you to the "research studies" being referenced, but it in fact takes you to another random autism resource group called.... Songbird Care?
And on that website we find the factoid again:
Ooh, look. Now they've added the word "some". The average lifespan for SOME autistic people. Which the next group erased from the fact. The message shifts further.
And we have slightly more information about the study! (Which has also shifted from "studies" to a singular "study"). And we have another link!
Wonderfully, this link actually takes us to the actual peer-reviewed 2020 study being discussed. [x]
And here, just by reading the abstract, we find the most important information of all.
This study followed a cohort of adolescent and adult autistic people across a 20 year time period. Within that time period, 6.4% of the cohort died. Within that 6.4%, the average age of death was 39 years.
So this number is VERY MUCH not the average age of death for autistic people, or even the average age of death for the cohort of autistic people in that study. It is the average age of death IF you died young and within the 20 year period of the study (n=26), and also we don't even know the average starting age of participants without digging into earlier papers, except that it was 10 or older. (If you're curious, the researchers in the study suggested reduced self-sufficiency to be among the biggest risk factors for the early mortality group.)
But the number in the study has been removed from it's context, gradually modified and spread around the web, and modified some more, until it is pretty much a nonsense number that everyone is citing from everyone else.
There ARE two other numbers that pop up semi-frequently:
One cites the life expectancy at 58. I will leave finding the context for that number as an exercise for the audience, since none of the places I saw it gave a direct citation for where they were getting it.
And then, probably the best and most relevant number floating around out there (and the least frequently cited) draws from a 2023 study of over 17,000 UK people with an autism diagnosis, across 30 years. [x] This study estimated life expectancies between 70 and 77 years, varying with sex and presence/absence of a learning disability. (As compared to the UK 80-83 average for the population as a whole.)
This is a set of numbers that makes way more sense and is backed by way better data, but isn't quite as snappy a soundbite to pass around the internet. I'm gonna pass it around anyway, because I feel bad about how many scared internet people I stumbled across while doing this search.
People on quora like "I'm autistic, can I live past 38"-- honey, YES. omg.
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tl;dr, when someone gives you a number out of context, consider that the context is probably important
also, make an amateur fact checker's life easier and CITE YOUR SOURCES
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