#i wont put it in his tag just yet bc i do not want the ricardians to come at me

[omgjumin]

Hello!

I heard you wanted some hc for gojo and or nanamin?

I have one!

Could you please write what would make them short circuit, as in, reader does something so so cute they just malfunction?

I guess this request works for both Gojo and Nanamin!

Thank you!

what you do to make them short circuit - gojo satoru + nanami kento!

notes: YES bc i know damn well it would be so easy to make them so flustered bc of smth you did like lets be honest here!!

tags: fluff, very slightly suggestive in gojos (you leave a hickey on gojo), that's it !!

gojo satoru

- gojo LOVES when you were lipgloss like he just finds so sexy on you especially if you kiss him and it leaves a mark

- he will literally keep that mark and wont rub it off even if hes in public like left a kiss mark on his cheek? oh it's whatever. on his neck? goes fucking wild but when people point it out to him while he's out he's like... "oh that? interesting." and carries on abt his day

- loves when you kiss him on the corners of his lips, it makes his heart do backflips in his chest he can't even explain why

- when you kiss him goodbye if you are in a rush and you end up kissing the corners of his lips, he will absolutely melt. (sometimes he exaggerates it) but it always ends up in him wrapping his arms around your waist and bringing you in for another long kiss. (he knows you're late so makes it last longer on purpose)

nanami kento

- nanami wont physically show that he's affected by your cuteness but if you were to put your hand on his chest, you could feel the sped up pace of his heart beating.

- the way you could be do anything and his heart will be running laps for you.

- one day, you and nanami were doing small little errands to set up the apartment you two just moved into and as you were breezing the isle asking him small questions about what brand you should get or what price is better, you turn over to look at him and he's standing there like 🧍‍♂️ his heart is doing cartwheels, backflips, running a 20 mil marathon and if he dares to take a step, he will pass out

- you looked so domestic to him, you were just being you, yet with every little question, you looked more and more like wife material. he started to imagine what you would look like with a ring around your finger and a matching one on his. you looked so pretty even if you were under terrible store lighting, he was in love with you

- anytime you do anything and i mean anything domestic, nanami just stops to stare at you while he tries to remain calm. (he always fails)

[invisible-brandy]

im gonna re: my own tags from a personal post and talk about spock at the academy utilising their kitchen like an actual person who can cook while most students eat instant noodles and synthesized food (or go out to eat - but that's expensive).

and kirk (who absolutely can not cook for shit at that age yet) smells something delicious and like a cartoon character follows that smell into the kitchen, expecting to find someone who brought in some take out, but instead it's spock quietly talking shit about the cheap pots and pans they have in there. is it illogical to talk to himself? sure. will he still do it? also sure, probably partially in vulcan too because he misses it wants to stay comfortable in his use of it. and for a few minutes jim just stands in the hallway, staring at this vulcan–their only vulcan, in fact, so he knows who he is–and he'd stand there longer admiring spock's beauty if his stomach didn't growl like it's trying to invite itself to dinner and that alerts spock and he's just standing there with a spoon in his hands awkwardly, posture like a question mark and a little red in the cheeks because of the steam from the pots.

of course jim gets to share the meal with him. and THEN amanda sends spock more cooking utensils, because spock of course in his letter (god i think spock would like hand written letters) or on their videochat says that the ones they have in the communal kitchen are trash and "it affected the quality of my meal and my dignity, mother" and amanda gets all perky eared like "your dignity? why, son, do tell me?" "im afraid ive put shame on your family recipe when i shared the meal i cooked with a human from my course."

amanda would absolutely want her baby to make friends through cooking them meals. AND and and

mccoy would also be one of the few people who can actually cook, but he's a terrible night owl, so for a bit they don't cross paths.

then, exam season hits and suddenly jim is in the kitchen at 2 am, sitting on the counter, feet swinging in the air, and he's still trying to convince spock to actually make them a meal (spock is in pajamas because he refuses to stay up too late to study "you're supposed to do during the day time, jim", but he's actually also been lying in bed and reciting material in his head because he is very illogically anxious before their first exam. he's starting to suspect some heart disease bc his heart wont calm down, but its actually just anxiety. kirk tells him that eventually). spock keeps trying to insist on something lighter, just a snack, and then bones comes in and shooes jim away from the counter so he can cook.

and spock and bones could later have joking (but with serious vibes) competitions for who can cook a meal that jim likes best (even going as far as to make the same meal and present it anonymously to jim. jim is both stressed and very happy and well fed) and of course they'd end up hanging out together outside of the communal kitchen too.

bones wouldn't be able to keep jim from perching up on top of kitchen counters or his desk, or really anywhere that he finds comfortable or sometimes even uncomfortable if it's at least a convenient place to sit and flirt with either bones or spock.

spock would get more packages from amanda and somehow they'd all end up going to the post office ("it's not that big of a package to need two humans and a vulcan to carry it, it's only some herbs" "spock, you are clearly yet to understand mothers. there are not gonna be only some herbs") and carrying the surprisingly giant box back under sudden rain. mccoy would either get splashed or just not be dressed for the weather and spock would lend him his jacket and it would be super warm and mccoy who always grows cold would kinda want to hoard it for himself, but he'd feel bad that first time.

not the next time though. they'd go out to the town and jim and bones would be drinking while spock would be trying to figure out if he likes bars or nightlife in general and bones would complain dramatically that he's cold and spock would of course lend him his jacket. spock would never see that jaket again, it's mccoy's now. (both because it's really warm and because it smells like spock)

[crystallizsch]

I want the infodump on Jamil and Yuusha ma'am I beg

THIS HAS BEEN UNANSWERED FOR A MONTH IM SORRY AUGH

but thank you so much yes im okay im normal about them i’ll do my best (for context i mentioned in the tags of one of my posts a while back wanting to infodump about them, but i forget which one it was jfkdlsjhl anyways-)

this won't be a full info dump because i think that would somewhat restrict my dynamic of them if i put it all into words (if that makes sense) ;;;

and i realized i lowkey dont have a coherent timeline for them (yet); i just put them in random scenarios of what i think would be fun at the moment

to make up for it i'll also put a silly self-indulgent sketch dump all below ;;;

I JUST REALIZED I DRAW THEM MAKING EYE CONTACT A LOT (bc something something there's a level of trust that jamil wont use his snake whisper on yuu anymore)

okay now for some random jamiyuu dynamics/hcs/lore

yuu fell first -> yuu lost feelings (bc why would you trust someone who took advantage you) -> ✨ then something happened ✨ -> jamil fell next but harder.

highkey disliked each other -and showed it- in the beginning bc of the whole scarabia drama; then an -accidental- act of service got them to think differently about one another. like "holy shit maybe they're not so bad after all???"

extremely slow burn.

very competitive with one another which then bled into their "flirting" / affectionate acts when they eventually became closer.

basically: “sweetheart” but rivalry -> “babe” but platonically -> “bro” but romantically pipeline.

(“are you flirting or starting a fight”)

yuu kinda throws around “love you” a lot, especially to her close friends; so -during their “platonic” stage- for some reason, jamil was the only “friend” she has not said this to. but it’s okay it’s not like jamil had referred to her as the “f-word” (friend) anyway.

had a mutual agreement that their romantic relationship is temporary because of yuu wanting to go home; they’re just going to “try it out” “no hard feelings”.

yuu made jamil promise to never use snake whisper on her ever again.

jamil: personal beef w/ bugs + afraid of them; yuu: personal beef w/ bugs (w/ a few exceptions) + not afraid of them, just generally pissed at their existence.

dancing and music lowkey became one of their love languages.

kalim genuinely became one yuu’s best friends because of how much they hit it off. jamil always third wheels them no matter the circumstance.

yuu loves grim more than jamil; jamil knows this very well. and so does grim.

[sugar-omi]

What if there was like this ending where we could elope with Baxter because like his entire outfit when we were planning the wedding is purple and just screams "Speak Now" by Taylor Swift. It's been like on my mind for the past few days. I love Cove with all my heart I promise but Baxter just makes my heart beat in a different way than Cove does. Could you like write this maybe?? Or just rant about it, Idm <3

omg i almost rewrote this bc it wasnt at the top of my drafts n i thought i lost it pls i almost lost my mind anyway i wont lie its more proposing less wedding but :,) i hope its ok tysm for the rq anon<333

tags : fluff, (after) step 4, eloping

synopsis : you propose to baxter and elope

I think baxter would be a bit sad to not have a full blown wedding, but I also think he's just happy n surprised to be marrying anyway LOL

I imagine he'd even be the one to propose it first, especially if he knows you don't want a wedding event.

but first I wanna talk abt the proposal...

you've woken up a bit earlier than baxter.

even though he says he's become tolerant of morning for his job, once his days off hit he's back to the same stumbling baxter you first saw.

so while your darling Victorian-emo man is sleeping in, you're up bustling around the kitchen preparing breakfast.

it's an assortment of croissants, fruit, oatmeal, eggs, and waffles.

it's simple in reality, since most of these things are store bought or like how the croissants are a messy craft you and baxter somehow didnt turn into an atomic bomb.

considering you two have the cooking skills of a racoon who cant reach the stove.

you've made bread with your ma before, so it turned out excellent.

only because you did most the work and baxter was your pretty assistant.

but you couldn't tell with how nicely things are plated up and prepared.

putting all the plates on the tray and carefully balancing it so as not to spill the contents, you start walking to your shared bedroom.

you're meet with a sleepy baxter, rubbing his eyes and his hair is sticking up on one side.

he's so cute..

he blinks and smiles, turning his body towards you. "there you are.. oh. what do we have here?" baxter raises an inquisitive brow and steals the mug of coffee once you set down the tray.

you're nervous, he doesn't even see the ringbox yet and you can't decide if it's a miracle or cruelty against your poor heart.

smiling at the sight of baxter and willing your voice to come out strong, you present your gifts.

"here we have a mug of black coffee, just how you like it."

baxter hums into the cup, joking with you. "I suppose it'll do."

you laugh and continue your presentation. "next are some waffles with a side of eggs, sunny side up, only laid by the best chickens. and here is an assortment of the finest fruit, picked by yours truly from the loveliest grocery store."

baxter doesn't even try to stiffle his laughter, snorting at your best snobby waiter voice.

"and what else is there?"

"well here we have an engagement ring, and finally some croissants with your pick of jam, peanut butter, or perhaps you'd like me to make a sandwich out of it, my good sir?"

baxter laughs, his head tossed back and holding tightly onto his coffee so he doesn't spill it on the sheets.

he's still laughing a bit as he comes down and he chooses from his platter. "I'll have the ring-" baxter wipes his tears of laughter.

"wonderful choice, sir." you pop open the ring box.

baxter let's out a small "wait-!" suddenly realizing what you just said.

you laugh, more out of nerves than anything. "baxter... I uh, well I have a lot I could say and I can't really decide what to say even then so.."

you pick up the box and present it to him.

"I love you, and I wanna be with you forever so baxter.. will you marry me?"

suddenly baxter is very awake, and he's staring at the black band with wide eyes. the single diamond in the middle of the silver strip is blinking back at him and before he realizes it he's crying.

baxter, still aware that there's a tray of food between you, moves it to the side and throws his arms around you.

when you decide to elope, wanting to forgo the whole wedding planning, it's still beautiful

you and baxter go shopping and pick out some clothes together.

he definitely insists on matching color schemes, so you end up going for a plum and black palette

baxter in his nice plum purple shirt n a black vest <3333

you have xavier as (one) of your witnesses and they take lot of pictures. all of them aren't great because they're definitely teary eyed and wiping away a few tears watching you get married because you've become such good friends.

please indulge him a bit and have a "reception"

it's really just baxter dressing up your house nicely and having all your friends and family over for a nice dinner

he'd just be bouncing around the house, hanging lights and confetti and there's a nice 2 tiered cake xavier made and its still very lovely and intimate

he's just so happy to be married to you, he loves you so much <3

[hwavsg4ch4n]

I'll Protect You || L.K

tags/warnings: afab!reader, bodyguard!Minho, royal!au, Princess!reader, angst, rough family dynamics, suggestive, forbidden love trope (lol), Minho calls reader "your/my grace", if i missed anything pls message me!!

notes: omg am I posting!? Hi everyoneeee, first off I want to ask how everyone has been~. I haven't been an active writer, that's because I realized I was looking at this as a job rather than a hobby that brings me joy :(, therefore I took a break. Can't say I'm gonna be constant bc thus is a hobby not a job, but I love to write and i'm pretty sure I wont stop! ( I have a lot of things in my drafts) btw, this is lowkey inspired by Bridgeton, but not quite.

Description: Being a royal isn't easy, especially when every choice is made for you. But maybe having a kind guard around isn't so bad.

this is a work of fiction, an alternate universe. The Irl persons are not made to be perceived this way. 18+ content ahead, viewer discretion is advised.

lmk if I should make this into a little series :o

You huffed, picking at the herbs that laid on your pasta as a garnish, tuning out the boring kingdom talk your mother and father indulged in with the rest of the family. The pearly satin gloves on your hands grew uncomfortable as the queen brung your personal life into conversation once more. 

“Y/n will get married soon, I just know it.” You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at your mothers comments. Your father, as always, just had to add salt to the wound. “There are many suitors sending letters to the palace every day, even some from overseas. I don’t understand why you never reply efficiently-” You gave a tight lipped pained smile, not wanting to cause a scene; avoiding trouble.

You didn’t want all these random men, men that only saw your family's wealth. You already had a man you yearned for, one that was different. You look up from the tablecloth, in the doorway of the dining room stood your personal guard; Minho. He wasn’t looking at you, he was on duty. If he looked anywhere but straight he’d be bound to have to skip dinner for a lecture from the head guard. But you didn’t mind that he wasn’t looking at you, it made it easier to stare and get lost in the comfort of your own imagination; daydreaming about how wonderful it would be to run away with the kind man that always made sure you weren’t lonely.

Minho wasn’t always in your life, he only came to serve the royal family a mere 2 years ago. Being assigned as your personal guard didn’t sound exciting at first, just another shackle put around your ankles to prevent you from living the best you could under these circumstances. But as you grew accustomed to his presence, memorizing the scars on Minho’s neck and hands, finding safety in the pure brown of his round eyes, and the soft smile that he often wore on his lips; the one he’d only show you, you didn’t dread being looked over 24/7. He was more than enough for you, enough to make you feel whole in a palace that only offered emptiness.

Before Minho was a royal guard, he was a warrior. He only knew battle, but he didn’t want to fight all the time anymore, he wished for something more calm; so here he is. Yes he was rough around the edges but he got the job done, the king and queen liked him because he seemed to make their princess stop complaining. They didn’t care how he did it, as long as they didn’t have to hear your mouth and watch you themselves. 

As you stared at the man who looked after you, daydreaming of an alternate universe where you could be normal… your mother; the queen, asked your sister-in-law; the dutchess, to make a toast. What for? You didn’t know, but what you did know was envy. You could practically turn the color green as you watched your brother's fond eyes stare up at the woman he loved. He got to marry the woman he loved so purely, why didn’t you get to do the same? He got to pick, choose… yet you have no say.

You cleared your throat after sipping from the dark glass of wine. “Excuse me. Mother, father, may I be excused? The meal doesn’t seem to be sitting right with my stomach.” Your words were respectful but your face held an expression only Minho could read clearly, therefore he shifted on his heels, ready to accompany you.

“You’ve barely touched your food, my grace.” Your sister-in-law meant well, you know she did. But the fact that she can have the life she wishes for while you’re sitting idle with no authority over yourself makes you frown almost every time you see her smile happily. “Yes, well, I seem to have caught a bug. May I be excused, please… your highness?” You offered a tight lipped smile at your mothers unhappy face. The poised woman sipped from her white wine as she shooed you off with a flick of the wrist, but you couldn’t leave the dining room without her having the last words.

“Y/n dear, I want you to know… no matter how much you try to fight it, this is your life. You will eat when I tell you, wear what I want you to, and marry who I wish you to. Is that understood, darling?” Your eyelids fluttered as you fought back tears of frustration, no matter how hard you tried to be perfect, she saw right through you. “You’re dismissed.” 

The maids opened the grand doors, offering you pity glances as you clacked off; struggling to keep your composure as Minho followed closely behind.

He didn’t say anything as you sped walk into the garden, breathing heavily as tears finally flowed down your cheeks. You looked down at your glove clad hands as you stopped in the center of the garden, sniffling as you rushed to rip them off. Throwing them to the rocky pavement as you dug your heel into the glimmering fabric.

“Your grace,” you sighed softly at the sound of his voice, the voice that calmed you whenever this would happen. Minho didn’t seem to know the effect he had on you, or maybe he did and decided to ignore it. Either way his presence always worked.

“It’s cold out, and you have nothing to cover yourself with, shall we go inside?” He asked softly, staring at your back as you looked at the now dirty satin gloves on the cobblestone. You shook your head in disagreement, turning around to be met with Minho’s gentle eyes underneath the moonlight.

“The breeze feels nice, I wish to stay out here for longer. You can go back if you’d like.” Your voice was weak as you sat on a bench, overlooking a small man made lake your brother made for you as an 11th birthday gift. You watched as the koi fish swam carelessly, free. You couldn’t help but chuckle at the irony. 

You know Minho didn’t leave, he wouldn’t leave even if you paid him to. “Why is this my life Minho?” He stayed silent. You looked up at him, his expression neutral, used to having heard this talk from you multiple times.

“Why can’t I marry the one I love? Be happy with him, feel the kind of love my brother and the dutchess have. It’s right at my fingertips, but it’s being ripped away.” Minho raised a brow, this was new. Your rants were always about freedom, not about love.

“… are you in love, my grace?” Minho was surprised. He’s with you every hour of the day, he surely would’ve noticed if you’ve developed a crush on someone. 

You parted your lips, realizing what you’ve just said. The wine has seemingly gotten to you.

You stand up, “I want to go to my room.” You whispered, walking passed the now curious man. Minho swiftly picked up your gloves and handed them to a maid as he followed you inside. 

You dismissed the help as they offered to undress you. “Please just… go to your chambers, I want to be alone.” They all left, except for him. You closed your room doors behind you, sighing. “Would you like me to leave too, your grace?” You rolled your eyes, turning around to face him.

You were tired, tired of pretending, tired of hiding. “Have you ever been in love, Minho?” Your guard frowned, then soon moved in a hurry to help as he saw you trying to take off your jewelry. You sucked in a breath of air as you saw his reflection in the mirror, focused on helping you with your pearls. You fought the urge of closing your eyes as his fingers grazed your skin.

“I have.” He answered shortly, “but she didn’t love me back, I got over it quickly, it was years ago. Honestly, I’ve forgotten until you just brought it up.” He understood you needed a distraction, so he gave it to you, as he always did. Didn’t matter if you asked for a war story and a made up one, whatever you asked of him he’d try to do.

You blinked, staring as he set your pearls down on your vanity, moving to work on your earrings. “What did it feel like?” Your voice came out in a whisper, causing Minho to look in the mirror to see you looking back at him. His heart skipped a beat, seeing the expression of longing on your face was almost too painful for him to see. A sweet girl like you shouldn’t be unhappy, yet here you are, unable to flap your wings like you should be.

“I wish I could tell you the beauty of it, my grace; but all I can tell you is the pain.” Minho said calmly, offering a polite smile to your reflection as he placed one earring down, moving to the next.

“It feels like a breath of fresh air after you’ve been suffocating for years. Like you’ve been lured in by a siren to live in the depths of the sea but finally you’ve been saved, being able To see the sun again.” Minho’s hands paused at your words, looking at you through the mirror once more. A pang in his chest follows as you look at him the way you did during dinner, only this time he notices.

“Your grace…” he whisperers. “It feels of the warm sun in the early summer, when you’re in a meadow surrounded by freshly bloomed daisies and dandelions. You know, when the breeze is just right? It feels… good.” Your small smile soon turns grim, watching as Minho sets the last piece of jewelry down. “It also hurts; like you said.” Minho stood silent, his heart pounding as you turned to face him; peering up into his sparkling eyes. “It hurts when I see that I can’t have you anyway that I want.” Minho’s breath hitched at your confession. “What do you mean… your grace… have me? I don’t seem to follow.”

You smiled painfully, reaching a manicured hand up to hold his cheek; stroking lightly. “I want you the way my brother wants the Dutchess, maybe even more. I don’t care if it’s forbidden… I want you. I want you to hold me, and do what they do in the dramas that my mother makes me turn off whenever they come on.” Your whispers travel across his now heated face.

“You… you’ve had too much to drink.” You scoffed at his stammering, surprising Minho. “No, I know what I said and I mean it. I’m a grown woman Minho, treat me as such.” You frowned, tired of being treated so fragilely.

Minho took your hand off his face, gazing down at you. “… treat you like a woman…” He looked into your eyes as he trailed off, your eyes drifted down to his chest. You nodded, looking back up to see him with parted lips and a frown. “Are you… are you in love with me?” You scoffed, feeling defensive at the possibility of rejection. 

“You can’t question feelings, Minho, it’s something we can’t entirely understand. If you don’t feel the same that’s fine, but don’t try to-” 

“thank you… for loving me.” He whispered. You frowned, “what do you mean?” He chuckled softly, “Thank you, for having feelings for me.” You watched as he bowed, pressing a chase kiss to the back of your hand. You flinched at the warmth of his lips.

“Minho…” he stood up, his hands caressing your cheeks as he moved closer. “This is forbidden, what we’re about to do, you know well that it is. But yet i’d still risk it, your grace. You find me worth the risk, you confessing to me is more than enough reason.” You tilted your head in confusion, “W-what are we about to do, Minho?”  He smiles. “I’m going to make love to you, if that’s ok. I feel as if you deserve it.” He whispers. 

Your cheeks flush, for the first time your eyes want to look anywhere but him. You’ve never done anything intimate with another before. “I don’t want you to feel like you’re obligated to… to touch me.” You whispered, looking down at his lips instead of his eyes that were trying to find yours.

Your lips part as you feel a soft kiss pressed to your forehead, sighing as he then places one at the corner of your mouth. “I’ve been trying to be… respectful, your grace. But must you know, I've been wanting to feel your skin on mine for a while.” You tensed up at his confession. “H-huh?” Your voice was weak, a rush of arousal, heat making its way into your abdomen.

Minho’s thumb traced the outline of your cupid's bow. “Do you know how hard it’s been… hearing you touch yourself late at night, and all I can do is stand outside your door and listen?” Your face grew hot, “Listen to you whisper my name, you probably didn’t even mean too. Did you, your grace?” His voice was soft but that didn’t mean you were any less nervous. “U-uh, I thought I… I’m sorry, I didn’t realize.” Minho chuckled softly at your pity excuse of an alibi.

“You can’t help it, I know. I’m the only one who takes care of you, it’s natural for you to call out to me in times like that. I find it adorable actually, that you need me. Your fingers sliding into your cunt, wishing that it was any part of me doing it instead. Are my assumptions correct, hm?” Minho tilted his head, his fingers grabbing ahold of your chin, making you look at him. It was as if your heart was in your ears by how loud it was currently beating.

“But even though I wasn’t able to help you, you always managed to cum. I know exactly what you sound like when you get there, I memorized it; you sound so fucking sweet, if I could record it I would, your grace.” You took in a deep breath, “Min-”, “What do you imagine that makes you cum every time? Do you imagine that your precious fingers are mine? What about… hm,” you watched in disbelief as he pondered other possibilities. “Ah, my tongue tasting you. Catching every last bit of you, not wasting a drop. Is it that, your grace?” 

You were speechless, your mind blank as all you could feel were his words gliding right through you and straight to your know throbbing core. Imagining the scenarios described to you, like you could feel it.

“Oh, what about this. Do you like thinking about how well I can fuck you? How Just me slipping into you can make all the frustration go away? How I can make your mind blank, your head fuzzy and your legs shake as I fuck you just the way you tell me too. Is that what gets you off, my grace?” You couldn’t help the soft whine that escaped your lips. Minho coos with a knowing grin, his hand traveling from your chin to grip your entire jaw, gently pulling you closer so the tip of your noses are grazing.

“So sweet, pretty, precious, aren’t you?” Your mind grew fuzzy. “Let me serve you, It’s my job; and I love to do my job.”

[seased]

7 movies 7 tags!

was tagged by @clannfearrunt hello con! i honestly watch a lot of movies, i have that kind of brain worm that needs a constant stream of input, but i feel like most of them just bounce off my skull...

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977) - this one pretty much traumatized me as a kid but it's been on my mind again. guy gets alien visions & makes a big pile of dirt in his living room... big enough his wife wants a divorce. what more do you need?

Apollo 18 (2011) - one of my favorites of all time. i just think they did a stellar job using the NASA footage gimmick for found footage horror.

Evangelion rebuild original trilogy (07, 09, 12) - most recent movies i watched (today). i still think theyre neat but im one of those eva meta text freaks sooooo... watched em with a friend whos never seen eva before lol.

The Black Hole (1979) - "In! Through! And beyond!". another childhood brain worm... but this one SUCKS. theres a spaceship on the edge of a black hole, and you just wont believe what the megalomaniacal robot obsessed captain has done to his crew.

Bladerunner 2049 (2017) - has just been on my mind. i think they did a decent job making a sequel to bladerunner that doesnt feel like a hollow pander-fest.

The Creator (2023) - most recent movie i saw in theaters. oh my god if youve seen the trailers and thought it looked BAD. im here to tell you. it was. i was head in hands for half the thing stg.

Dinosaur (2000) - i always put dinosaur on lists like this bc it was the one i was MOST obsessed with as a kid. i wore that vhs OUT. and yet i cannot for the life of me remember how that movie ends.

i think the original intent of this game was like "list 7 movies" lmao but do whatever... idk if yall like memes like this but opportunity to talk about movies! @yardsard666 @neozoid @inkysquabble @kiwigreenie @bloodsbane @the-ideaist and i dont have a 7th person

[lizard-dyk3]

repost bc i forgot the tags

Chapter 1

The end of a long day. I just wanted to go home. I walk to the end of the parking lot. Someone took my usual spot so I had to park at the far end. That was the start to my shitty day. A whole 10 hours I will never get back. I’ve been thinking about switching jobs, but that’s just going to make my problems worse. This job is all I got, and I hate it.

It’s late, and I’m tired. Walking this far is just making everything worse. It’s so dark and cold out. I feel like I’m being watched, but I know I’m not. No one is here this late. Just me and my car that feels like it’s miles away.

My spine shivers. I can see my breath which shows just how cold it is. It shouldn’t be this cold. I hear movement in the distance behind me. I turn around to look for where it’s coming from, but I see nothing. I turn back around and start to walk faster. The clicking of my heels on the ground echos throughout the parking lot. I finally get to my car and get inside. The car wont start. Perfect. I hear that sound again.

Looking behind me was the worse decision I’ve ever made, the man in my backseat grabbed my hair and threw my head into the steering wheel.

Now opening my eyes was so far the best decision I’ve ever made. Two tall men fighting off my capturer. They were well experienced in their fighting, in the back of my mind I couldn’t help but think what else they were experienced at.

One of them grabbing my capturer in the back seat. He throws him on the ground. I couldn’t even see what he did next, but I could hear the fighting. I was distracted by the other man. He was taller with a few strands of hair that fell right in front of his face. Almost like they were perfectly placed there. He grabs my arm pulling me out of the car and closer to him. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me away from the car. I tuck my head into his chest. He smells of sweat and cologne.

“Hey, are you okay?” His voice is so deep, yet so calming.

I nod without speaking a word. He yells something at the other man. I wasn’t paying attention to what he said. I couldn’t stop looking at him since he spoke to me. His eyes were so soft yet concentrated at the same time. I look back at the other man. I only see the back of him. He starts saying something that I can’t quite make out. I think it might be another language.

I couldn’t believe what I saw next. The capturer disappears. Black smoke flying out of him and covering the sky. The man drops.

“I know it’s hard to believe, but that was a demon. It was trying to kill you,” the tall man says.

I look back at him scared and confused. I don’t ask questions. I just want to get out of here. He pulls me away from him and puts his arm around me. He leads me the other way and we start jogging over to a car. It looks old but really nice at the same time. It a black muscle car possibly Chevy. Once we get over to it, he opens the back door and I get in. He shuts the door and gets into the passenger seat in front of me. The sound of the engine almost drowns out the impossibly loud classic rock that scares the shit out of me.

The drivers seat door opens. The other man gets in the car quickly. He reversed the car looking behind him. I get a better look at him this time. His hair is short unlike the other guy. He turns back around and starts to speed off.

“Who are you guys?” I ask.

They look at each other before the the guy in the driver seat speaks. He starts to turn down the radio.

“I’m dean. This is Sam, my brother. We just saved your life.”

Sam turns around and looks at me.

“This is kind of what we do. It’s our job.”

Job? What kind of fucking job is this. Are these guys insane. I feel like I should jump out of the car but for some reason, I feel like I should trust them.

“Where are we going, exactly.”

They both stay silence for a minute and then Sam speaks again.

“To a motel. You will be safe there.”

“Sam, no are you out of your mind? We cant take her with us.”

“Dean where else is she going to go? We can’t just leave her somewhere.”

“She still can’t come with us.”

“Why not?”

“You know why Sam.”

Sam stays silent. You can only hear the low volume of the music and the loud engine of the car.

“Please Dean,” Same says looking over at Dean with a worried look on his face.

“Fine,” Dean says without looking back to him.

“Um, do I get any input in this? I would like to go home.”

“You can’t,” Dean says.

“And why not?”

“Don’t argue.”

I don’t answer back. Dean seems like the stubborn one. It’s not worth arguing with him. Dean turns up the music. No one says another word the rest of the drive.

***

We arrive at the motel. The red lighting of the motel sign is all you can see. It’s so dark that I can barley make out what the building looks like.

Dean and Sam get out of the car, slamming the car door in sync. I hear the truck open behind me, and then slam. Sam walks over to my door. He opens the door, waiting for me to get out. I get out and trail behind Dean, who is already walking towards their room. I hear the door shut behind me. Dean fumbles with the key before getting to the door.

He opens the door and throws the duffle bag that I assume he got from the trunk, and tosses it next to the bed. He throws the keys on the bed, and walks to the small desk in the corner.

There’s no doubt that the motel is old. It’s small and everything looks out of date. I walk towards the other bed in the room, and sit down. I watch Sam go towards the other side of the bed I’m on and crouch down on the floor to get something.

It’s a bag. He pulls out a laptop and a book. It looks like an old book, possibly a journal. He sits down and opens his laptop. Dean walks back over with a small bottle in his hand. He dips his fingertips in what seems to look like water, and flicks it at me.

“What was that for!?” I say wiping it off my face.

“Had to make sure you weren’t a demon,” he says with a smirk, walking back over to the bed.

“Dean,” Sam says with a slightly annoyed face.

“What?,” Dean says shrugging his shoulders, looking back at Sam with a confused look on his face.

Sam doesn’t say anything and goes back to looking at his laptop screen. He looks so concentrated. I wonder what he’s doing.

“Sam, let’s go.”

“You need to stay here. Don’t open that door, and don’t tell anyone you’re here,” Sam says looking at me seriously.

“I can’t let my friend know I’m ok!? She’s going to freak out,” I yell.

“Sorry sweetheart, no one can know,” Dean says smiling.

“This is temporary. If you want to be safe I need you to listen to us.

I don’t say anything and scoot myself towards the head of the the bed. I hope they’re right. This place gives me a weird feeling. I don’t want to be here longer than I should.

They walk towards the door. Dean with his duffel bag and Sam empty handed. He must have already put his stuff away and I just didn’t notice.

“We’ll be back soon,” Sam says with a small smile.

They leave, locking the door. I sit in silence for a few minutes, going over in my head what just happened. I cant sit with my thoughts for too long. It’s draining me. I look over at the small table in between the beds to see a remote. I grab it, assuming it was for the TV.

I kick off my shoes and slide myself under the covers because I’m cold. I click the TV and start searching. I watch a channel for a while before flipping to the next. I really had to be trapped here with shit cable. Perfect. I roll over and close my eyes, trying to get a nap in before they get back. The background noise of the TV slowly starts to drown out.

***

“What are we going to do with her?”

“Dean, why are you so fast to get rid of her? I really think it’s best if she stays here.”

My eyes slowly start to adjust to light, as I wake up. I squint my eyes, looking over across the room. Sam and Dean at the desk, eating.

“Why? You like her or something?” Dean says with a giggle.

“Shut up,” Sam says clearly annoyed.

I start to sit up on the bed while continuing to listen to their conversation. I see Dean look over at me and then right back.

“Your girlfriends up,” Dean says as he’s playing with his food with his fork.

Sam looks at him with a blank stare. Dean smiles at him even with his face shoved full of food. Sam looks over at me.

“We got you some food if your hungry.”

“Oh. Thanks.”

I get up and walk over towards them. Sam hands me a styrofoam box. I open it up to see some type of noodle and chicken. It actually looks really good. Dean grabs what’s left of his food and throws it away. He goes at sits on the edge of the bed, searching through channels on the TV.

“Here, sit,” Sam motions with his hand for me to sit in the chair Dean was just in.

I sit down and start eating. I feel like I haven’t eaten in hours. Which is probably because I haven’t. We sit silently, only hearing whatever’s on the TV play. I glance up at Sam to see that he’s more concerned with that book than his food. I want to ask what’s in it, but I don’t. I just keep it to myself.

***

“It’s late and we got a big day tomorrow go to bed,” Dean says getting into one of the beds.

I assume that Sam is going to lay in the other bed so I steal one of the pillows and go to set up a bed on the floor.

“Hey, you can sleep here. I’ll take the floor,” Sam says in a soft tone.

He sounds so much different when he talks to his brother than when he talks to me.

“No it’s fine. I’m sure you need it more than I do.”

“No, please just take the bed,” he says gesturing his arm towards to bed.

I don’t argue because I know it’s going to get me nowhere. I give him a small smile and nod while walking over to the bed and getting in the covers. I watch as Sam takes the pillow I had and grabs a big jacket from a pile of cloths in the corner. He gets down on his knees and then lays down, pulling the jacket over him like a blanket.

I feel bad. Him and Dean are probably out all the time barley getting any sleep and fighting off weird shit all day. They must be exhausted. I cant let Sam sleep in the floor. If I ask to trade places again, he’s just going to play nice guy and tell me to stay on the bed. Dean with probably be mad we’re talking and yell at Sam.

“Hey, um, Sam?”

“Yeah, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Sam says shooting up off the floor.

I haven’t really said much since I’ve been with him so he probably think that I’m talking to him because something wrong.

“Oh. No. I-I was just wondering if you wanted to sleep up here with me. I don’t want it to be weird but, it doesn’t look that conformable on the floor,” I say with a shaky voice.

“You want me to sleep with you?”

“Yeah if you want. Well wait no. N-not like that-I just meant-“

“Hey, sorry I didn’t mean to make it come out that way. Yeah I’ll come up there with you,” he says in a quiet voice, chuckling a little.

He gets up, bring the pillow with him. I watch him as he gets under the covers, putting the pillow behind his head. He puts his arms up and behind his head. Looking up at the ceiling. I don’t even realize I’m staring until he looks over at me and smiles.

“Well goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” I whisper.

***

I can’t sleep. I look over at the clock to see the time on the table beside the bed. 3:47. I’m so tired but I can’t go to bed. I need something to distract me, especially from Deans loud snoring. I’m facing the opposite way of Sam. I can’t listen to Dean any longer. I decide to turn over, hoping it will drown out the sound a little.

To my surprise, he’s awake. He’s still looking up at the ceiling, but his hands are down by his stomach now. He looks over at me with a small smile.

“Can’t sleep either?”

His face looks so different. It almost like he’s a different person. He has this seductive smile on his face. I can’t look away. It’s intimidating but calming at the same time. I need to stop, but I think I’m just sleep deprived.

“Yeah. There’s just a lot going through my head,” I say quietly.

I heard the bed other bed creek. Dean stops snoring for a bit. Then it starts again.

“Sorry about him, he’s a loud sleeper.”

“I’ve noticed,” I say, letting out a small giggle after.

“You get use to it, I guess.”

I’m hoping I don’t have to get used to it. I really don’t want to be here any longer than I should. I just want to go back home and live my normal life again. Plus, I’m surprised Dean hasn’t woken up the whole motel.

“Hey, you okay?” Sam asks turning so that he’s now facing me. He’s probably asking since I didn’t answer him before.

“No, yeah. I’m good, just tired. I don’t know.”

“You know you’ll be safe here right.”

The way he says that makes everything feel so calming.

“Yeah,” I say smiling.

He doesn’t really say anything after that. We just stare at each other. It sounds weird, but it almost feels like its natural. The moment gets interrupted but the sound of the air conditioning turning on. It’s loud, almost drowning out Deans snoring. I feel the cold air on my arm, that makes me shiver.

“You cold?”

“Ugh yeah, a little. But I-I’m fine.”

“Come closer,” he says putting his arm up and around at the head of my pillow.

He pulls me in closer to him, laying the covers over me more. I mean it is a lot warmer. I’m not going to fight it.

“Better?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

He takes his arm that on my pillow and brings it down to my head. He starts playing with my hair soothingly. I didn’t see that coming. I look up at him. He looks focused on what he’s doing. He’s smiling while looking at the top of my head. He then looks down at me, and his smile fades.

“Oh, sorry. Is this okay?” he asks, looking concerned.

“Yeah, sorry. I just-do you do this with all the girls you save?”

“Well actually your the first,” he says looking back at my hair, with a smirk.

“Sorry, maybe it’s a little late to ask, but I didn’t catch your name?”

“y/n.”

“I like that name.”

I look up at him again. I cant pull myself away from his eyes. It’s kind of hard to see them in the dark, but even then, you can see how caring they are. He looks down at me and sees me staring. I see his eyes glance down at my lips and back up to my eyes.

He kisses me. I pull away. I can’t do this, I don’t even know this guy. He looks so eager though. His eyes looking down at me. I go back and kiss him. He pulls apart, putting his hand on my cheek and moves me closer to him. Our lips touch again, moving in sync. His lips are so soft. I’ve kissed a lot of guys before, but this was different. I’ve never felt like this before.

He then moves his lips down to my cheek and down my neck. I feel pure ecstasy as he gently sucks on my neck. He moves where he’s on top of me now. His hands moving down as his lips move down. He starts moving down faster, making me breath more heavily. He gets down to my stomach, pulling my shirt up. He continues leaving kisses all down my body. He gets close to my core, making me let out a small moan. I feel his hand immediately cover my mouth. My eyes go wide as I see him come back up where I can now see his face.

“Shhh. Deans sleeping. Can you be good and be quite for me?” he says with that look in his eyes.

Fuck he’s so hot. This almost feels wrong though. I can’t do this with him. I just met this guy. He slowly takes his hand off my mouth to let me speak.

“Maybe we shouldn’t do this with your brother right there.”

“He won’t even know if you’re quite. But only if it’s okay with you.”

“Okay, yes,” I give in.

I never thought I would give in so fast. He takes off his shirt and then takes off mine. I stare at his naked chest. I put my hand out and run it down his torso. I notice the tattoo on the left side of his chest. He interrupts my thoughts as he starts to speak.

“You like what you see?”

I nod vigorously while slightly biting the side of my lip. He grabs my hand from his torso and my other one and brings them up over my head. He comes back up to kiss me again, more eager than the last time. He trails down to my breasts and starts leaving small hickeys on them. I let out another small moan, forgetting to be quite. He looks back up and puts his hand over my mouth again.

“Remember what I said. If you do it again I’m going to have to punish you.”

I nod and he releases his hand. He looks at me before slowing going down to my core. He tugs at my pants, trying to get them off. I lift myself up a little to quicken the process.

“Is this okay?”

I nod.

“I need to hear your words.”

“Yes. Please.”

“Eager, are we?”

I nod again. He puts his middle and ring finger on the cloth, covering my core. I’m so wet already. I know he can feel it. He starts rubbing them in a circular motion. Fuck. I wave of ecstasy runs through my body and makes me shake. I quickly put my hand over my mouth, so stop any sound from coming out.

He starts moving faster. I squeeze my hand tighter on my face, probably leaving a mark. You can barley hear my muffled moans. Sam comes back up so we’re face to face. He takes my hand from my mouth, holding it over my head with my other hand. He starts kissing me, still rubbing his fingers on the wet cloth covering my core. I let out small moans into his mouth. He keeps kissing me, but more vigorously this time.

He stops moving his fingers, while his lips leave mine. You can see my chest moving up and down from my heavy breathing. He moves back down towards my core.

“You’re already so wet for me and the real fun hasn’t even begun,” he says with a deviled eye smile.

He starts taking off my panties, slowly. He managed to get them off. He looks down at my core. He grabs my hips and pulls me closer to him. He looks up at me for approval.

“Do it,” I say impatiently.

He nods and smiles while he looks at me. He then gets closer to my core. I’m so impatient I can’t stand it. I need him. I can feel his breath on me. That’s when I feel him lick up my slit, slowly. I slam my hand back to my mouth, knowing I won’t be able to keep quiet. He does it again, this time sucking on it when gets to my clit. I moan into my hand, squeezing my eyes shut. I then widen them open again when I feel his tongue push inside me. Oh my god. I don’t know how much longer I can take of this.

He the starts slowly flicking his tongue back and fourth in between my slit. He starts going faster. I can feel my climax approaching. I moan into my hand more, squeezing my hand over my face even tighter. He starts pushing his tongue in me farther, flicking it and sucking on my clit. Fuck. I wrap my legs around his neck, and put my other hand on his hair, gripping it forcefully. He keeps going faster and messier.

I’m going to cum. I take my hand from my mouth, still gripping his hair with the other one.

“F-faster,” I moan quietly.

He stops. He’s teasing me. He moves back up to me, which makes me unwrap my legs and let go of his hair. You can see the glistening around his mouth. He starts kissing me, very needy. I taste myself on his lips and in his mouth. He pulls apart from me.

“I thought I told you to keep quite.”

“I’m s-sorry. Please. I-I need you.”

He dips his head down by my ear.

“I’m going to have to punish you now,” he whispers before looking back at me.

I feel one of his fingers slam into me, moving eagerly in and out. He puts another in, going faster. He puts his hand over my mouth before I can even let out a moan. He looks down and what he’s doing then back at me. My eyes squeeze shut.

“Open them, or I’ll stop.”

I open them quickly, looking into his.

“I want you to watch me finger you.”

I nod at him. I moan even louder into his hand. He adds another finger. I slam my eyes closed, quickly opening them again. I look at Sam to see if he noticed. He didn’t. He starts moving faster and more vigorously. I look into his eyes as he continues to finger me. My eyes are watering. I can feel yesterdays mascara run down my face. He puts his head on my forehead, taking his hand off my mouth. He starts kissing me, our lips moving in sync. It’s eager but passionate at the same time. I moan into his mouth as I feel my climax coming. I pull away.

“I-I’m gonna c-cum,” I say with a shaky breath.

He goes faster. I throw my head back gripping the sheets and either side of me. He puts his lips back on mine to drown out the sound of me moaning. His fingers slamming in and out of me, making my legs shake. He stopping kissing me. He takes his fingers out, shoving them in my mouth. I suck on them, tasting myself, yet again.

He takes them out and rubs his fingers in a circular motion on my clit. I can feel it coming. A wave of ecstasy runs through my whole body. I let go of the sheets with one hand, now gripping his arm. I look up at him. My eyes begging for him to let me finish.

“Cum for me, y/n.”

He slams two fingers back into me, continuing to rub my clit with his thumb. A wave of relieve runs through me. I let out one last moan, on his chest. I fall back on the bed. The thought of what just happened clouds my brain. He slowly releases his fingers from me, coming up to kiss me. It’s a slow, passionate kiss. I cant even focus on it, I’m so out of it. No one has ever made me feel like that. This was so different.

I finally come back to reality, looking up at Sam with heavy breaths. I see him just staring at me. Once I can finally catch my breath, I start to undo his pants. He grabs my hand and stops me.

“Not tonight.”

“I want to,” I say trying to convince him.

“You’re too tired, you should get some sleep.”

Why doesn’t he want me? Was I bad? It makes me wonder if there’s something more to this or if he really just doesn’t want to right now. I think he notices the sorry look I have in my face, when he placed his hand in my cheek.

“Hey. You did great okay? It’s just really late and you should sleep. Plus, your probably really sensitive.”

I didn’t really realize that until he said something. I am pretty sensitive. This is going to hurt like a bitch tomorrow. He gives me another kiss before he starts putting his shirt back on and handing me my cloths. I get dressed and he lays back down beside me. He pulls me in to him. Putting his arms around my torso. I can feel his boner on my ass, but he’s right, I am way too tired to try anything right now.

“Goodnight y/n.”

“Goodnight Sam.”

My thoughts spiral before I drift into my sleep. How the hell did Dean not hear us?

[acadarnia]

hi!! i was just going through the pobaw tag and saw a post you made in sept of last year (i was going to link it, but i cant seem to be able to) but it was about relating to jude from a little life (which im yet to read, unfortunately, so i cant comment much) and hoping that a group of extroverts will take you in, like sam and patrick did for charlie.

now, i dont know you at all (i literally only saw ur post bc i was going through the pobaw tag) and my context is probably completely digferent from yours, but i just want to say i hope that now, over half a year later, you have found uni to be okay, or even good. fun. i hope youre doing well and you have some friends, even if its just people you say hi to in class and people who come to sit with you in the workshops/tutorials/labs etc. i hope that you know that making friends in uni is really hard (im in my fourth year of uni and i just started a new course - and making friends is still so terrifying) and (in my experience) its different to highschool in so many ways but its okay. you'll be okay, even if right noe you feel like your anxieties frim nack then were right.

obviously, there exists the possibility that you arent even in uni now - you might have changed your mind, or something might bave happened - but whether or not you are or arent in uni, whether you have a whole class of friends or just one or none, i hope its okay for me to send you a bit of love.

tbh i dont think what i intended to say is properly communicated through this ask, but i just wanted to.. kind of reach out? im not following you so if you reply to this (heck, idek if youre still on tumblr) i probably wont see it but idk, i guess i just wanted to send a bit of love. i hope youre well <3

thank you so much <3 fortunately life started going well, so well for me, i started to put myself first, i made some friends and i hope we'll stick together after uni too. it got better. it had to 💕 i appreciate the thought and the effort to write to me. love you, take care, kisses.

[sangreprince]

Part four!

Aaaand... I think that's everybody. You all are fantastic, and I'm so grateful to have you all here. But I ain't doin this shit for 200 followers or more, then you just get highlights bc this took me like three hours and a lot of channeled autism.

@h-toga : I'm so ready for chaos with these two. I dont know much about MHA but toss a villain with an affinity for blood at Zagreus and there's BOUND to be some good content to come. That said I love your headcanons around Toga and they're so interesting to read as somebody just getting into the franchise. I'm super excited for all that's' to come and yeah!!

@slverblood : I saw your post about taking a break and I totally get it, but I wanna say I love reading your analysis of Aylin so far. Like whenever you come back, please dont hesitate to thow her at Zagrues! I think your portrayal is fantastic, Holly and I'd be so stoked to have even more!!

@timelessharp : Have I mentioned that I'm a huge Jahira fan because I absolutely am. I love that ol' lady and you do her so much justice to say the least, and I'd love to see her reaction & Dynamic with Zagreus as stuff goes on!! Your writing is great and I'm so ready to just jump into plotting for stuff tbfh.

@firestarved : RUNAAA I know we've been mutual on a few blogs now but please feel free to toss any and all of your characters at me. I think(?) you have my discord but either way please toss all your OCs my way, as well as any canons you'd like!! Your art, writing, and worldbuilding is always a joy to read and I'll take as much as I can get!

@murderof : First of all you got a fire url, secondly your Zevron is practically screaming his voice lines off the blog at me! Like it's breathtaking, and I'd love to discuss the chemistry and interactions between him and Zagreus because that seems like such an interesting series of interactions. I might have tagged one of your other blogs here Mel but STILL!

@shesquiinnsane : Blue your writing is fantastic and even though we don't talk a lot anymore, I'd so love to get back into the swing of things. You do such a good job with Harls and I hope everything is going extremely well for you on your end!! I'm always open to chatting whenever and MWAH in general!!

@n1ghtwarden : CLAIRE another Minthara enjoyer is always welcome. You're so fun to talk with and even though I dont got a lot of time on my hands, I appreciate every instance where we get the chance to shoot the breeze. Please never hesitate to hit me up with ideas for plotting, or just ooc chatter!! Like genuinely, I appreciate it whenever it comes <3

@thwipit : I know I said it before but I'll say it again: I adore your peter, it's so good. We only just started talking but I want you to know that I'm excited for any and everything that comes out of Peter and Zag interacting!! The potential there is just *chefskiss* and the quality you consistently put out is the icing on the cake.

@zoeticbled : We haven't gotten the chance to interact properly but I wont lie to you, you have such a good taste in your muses. The ocs are MMM tasty, and the choice of League muses is just fantastic overall. I'd love to interact with any and all of them and even though I havent had the time to reach out persay, I wanna just mention that I'll happily take whoever you're feeling and I'm so stoked to get started!

@rotdame : I laughed so hard at the first ask you sent and I'm STILL tryna put together the best response for it. Cordelia is great and I adore seeing her on the dash. Speaking of, I wanna say bloom that like?? Your card is PHENOMENAL and I'm still super impressed by it to this day. I think your girl and Halsin should get all the attention in the world, it's a pleasure to have you around and be able to interact!!

@blueheals : We haven't done much yet but your Jester is so soft, I adore her from what I've read so far!! I'd love to plot things out and feel vibes as we go but man I'm excited sdkfjh You do a great job with her Evie and I just wanna say it's super noticed-

@murdershaped : SO Orin and Zagreus are gonna try and kill eachother to no end but I'm so here for it. I love you reaching out and instantly matching the vibes, it means a lot and makes me so comfy already ksjhsdf THAT SAID please toss any ideas you have at me because your Orin is fantastic and I'm so ready for it.

@vulpesse : BUNN Your Ahri is wonderful and I'm so excited to get the ball rolling with her. Her and Zagreus could be such an interesting plot point and like, I cant wait to actually get chatting more. I also probably should offer you Voli stuff still but REGARDLESS I'm excited and glad you're here!!

@evelicious : Your Eve??? Wonderful. To die for (literally) and Cait?? Oh my gosh you just absolutely kill it. I'm super stoked to get writing and I can't wait to plot and interact. It's fantastic to see your writing when it does crop up and like, in the meantime between posts bc life sucks?? Dude never be afraid to plot or just scream ideas at me, I'm so here for it and I'm SO excited to do it with any of the characters you write.

@bloodczar : Harls your Astarion blog is so nice, it impressed me day one and the vibes were just immaculate. I love how you paint him as he is, and I know i havent reached out but like. Please gimme any and all ideas you have for him and Zagreus because there's a ton of potential for that dynamic and I'm so here for all of it!!

@fearsgod : SO I KNOW I OWE YOU STUFF but also I'm just gonna go on a lil ramble about how much you care about Cel. It's always been so consistently good throughout the years and you're just a ton of fun to talk with (even if I vanish for months / years at at time skjdfh) and I really am glad to see you and your writing getting the love it deserves!!

@sleepytime-muses : Peachie I know I rambled recently but. You're a damned good friend and I'm so glad you're here -- I know times have been tough but you always brighten my day and I'm glad to have you every time I can get ya <3

@vitrumbra : SO FIRST OF ALL the design of your blog had me hooked from the second I saw it. Then I read the lore you wrote and oh my god??? I'm so stoked to get started writing. OC positiivity is something I firmly stand on and both of your blorbos are so welcome to come bother Zagreus any time and all the time. I know we haven't talked yet but please take this as an open invitation bc I'm so excited!!

I wanna keep this brief (graphic design is my passion level effort but also it kinda works in a really funny way) !!! I wanna let you all know I appreciate the love you've given Zagreus and I'm so so happy to be here. You're all great and wonderful and I could say so many good things to say about each and every one of my mutuals. So fuck it, that's what I'mma do. Because you all truly deserve it. I'm super happy with Zagreus and being able to share my portrayal and have it be well received means so much !!! It's easy to say 'thank you all so much' but I want to acknowledge that I truly do appreciate and care about each and every one of my mutuals, even if my time / availability makes it tough at times. PART 1/4

@withinchains / @hercarnality : Elle you already know how much ily so I'm gonna keep this short. You're such an amazing friend and writer and you already have the screenshot about me gushing pinned so eat my shorts and play arams with me. Your Morgana is to die for and you write every character to a fucking T because of how you just interpret all their personalities and put them into words SO effortlessly.

@lasraichean : NEMO U SMELL LIKE BEEF and I think you're fantastic. You pour so much effort into all your OCs and that passion does you so much credit. You absolutely shower Annie with love in such a way that I shower everyone else with unrequested amounts of fromsoft lore so MWAH.

@blackrosesmatron : Lucy your LB is fantastic and you're so easy to talk to and communicate with. Genuinely every time we sit down and plot I find myself getting so enthralled in her antics and character. You do her so much justice

@avernusfuries : HAN You single handedly made me like Karlach and that isn't even a joke. Before we met and started writing I always thought her story was one of the weaker ones and you somehow managed to turn her into one of the more realized characters in the game. HATS OFF TO YOU and every day I beg for more of this big doofus.

@feuerwizard : Crys I know I need to get back to you for plotting things, I've just been so busy but I want to say: You and some of the other CR writers you write with are so talented and I adore reading your posts. Were it not for you guys I still probably wouldn't have any interest in CR and I'm so so excited to get started with more stuff and actually get threads going!

@soulcluster : Lilah I think all your portrayals are excellent. Your MM deserves all the attention it gets and I honestly couldn't pick a favorite muse if gave me truth serum. Plotting with you is a blast and I'm so thankful for all the ideas we pass between eachother!

@pitgritted : Your Sett, Taric, and Mutli are all so well done Jojo. I can tell you really care about all the people you write and it shines so brightly, right down the amount of detail you place into every reply and how you format things. Passion shows in the end and this is no exception!!

@palespawn : This sassy motherfucker. We've only just started writing and I still need to get to replies but you've showed interest since almost day one and I cant say how much I appreciate that. Courtney you do such a beautiful job with the twink, I almost dont wanna stab him. Almost~

@infinitysagas : I first of all wanna say thank you for writing such underappreciated characters. To see Damon get love brings me so much joy, I always take a second to read his posts when I see them come up. I know we haven't done a ton but please know that I see your writing and totally wanna do stuff, I'm just very busy skdjhf.

@deathdxnces : Irelia was a character I never cared about too much, but how you humanize her so much and have expanded on her character beyond what Riot's given us does SO much for me. I actually adore how you portray her, Mel, and I wish to get writing at some point soon!! I know you liked a starter a bit ago and I do plan to get to that, but please do not hesitate to hit me up for plotting in the meantime. It really does help and I promise I don't bite!!

@tealbeats : I know you're not super active on Ez (and I still owe you a lot of stuff actually) but I wanna say I love the amount of his personality you're able to paint into every interaction. You have such a way of making him the perfect amount of insufferable (in the best way) while still twisting it in SUCH an endearing light. I love that annoying little bug and I'm so glad you do too, because it really shows.

@agonizedembrace : Han it's been really nice to reach out and get into contact again. You're genuinely a really funny, interesting, and thoughtful person who cares about Evelynn in such a way that brings out every aspect of her character. The agony, the sex appeal, the sass, the confidence, you just nail all of it and I'm really hoping we can get stuff going soon!

@bendwill : Elder scrolls blogs are few and far between, but Miraak is absolutely one of those characters that deserves to be more written out. We haven't gotten to do a ton but please don't hesitate to hit me up and scream ideas at me, the idea of Tamrielic Zagreus is very fascinating to me. (And also I need somebody to ramble about my Oblivion D&D Campaign ideas with skdfjh)

@ofweave : First of all, trans gale is based as fuck and you have a vision. Second of all, I know you're on hiatus but once you come back I'd be so happy to get the ball rolling with this stinky wizard man!!

@kismetwilled : I'm not gonna lie, seeing how you pour effort into your headcanons and thoughtful replies kind of inspired me to do similar with my own. I also want to say that I'd love to plot more and yell ideas all day with you, your style is gorgeous and I find myself appreciating characters on your blog I've never even heard of or are barely familiar with. Seriously Dani, it's top tier and I'm so happy to be mutuals.

@enrogued : We haven't gotten anything started with but I'm so hyped. Rogue as a character has such fascinating potential with her powers, and that's not to mention her attitude towards others in general. Once stuff gets started I'm probably never gonna shut up in your DMs but like that's a constant sdfjkh STILL!!

@lunarrepel : Shadowheart my beloved. The aesthetics, writing, dialog, everything you do with her is SO on point and I can't get over it. I was already biased and liked her after Larian adjusted her a bit during the beta phase of BG3 but still. Man you just nail her and I'm so excited to develop these two out. They give wine aunt energy and THAT alone gives me so much life.

@dreadgloom / @cinderschild : I wont lie to you I was GIDDY when I found out you wrote a WoTR character. I honestly expected that fandom to have more of a presence on tumblr but I'll take what small fanclub we can get right?? And also can I comment on the takes you have from Salvatore are absolutely genius and play really well into WoTC's drow?? Genuinely fantastic worldbuilding and it's always a pleasure to see you crop up on the dash.

@nightsbloom : Your headcanons and replies have been gorgeus and I just want to say despite me being really busy and not getting around to approaching yet, I'm so excited??? Also a while back you reblogged a Qimir gifset and it's still living rent free in my head so thank you for the food chef--- Please though, if you have any thoughts or even just dynamic ideas - toss them at me at mach 5 and I will run with them because I'm HYPE.

@spiderwarden : I think you officially win the title of Minthara's #1 fan. Her performance (as I've mentioned) is absolutely captivating, as is your writing. I'm very excited to see where her interactions with Zagreus go and writing with you (or even just seeing your random hc posts and comments) is such a blast. I will always sit down and listen to you ramble about her, I think she's so fascinating and that's in no small part to how you manage to inject so much life and love into her despite all the cut content.

[queenaboleyna]

Hi, I hope I'm not annoying you. Is it ok to ask what you think happened to the princes in the tower?

you’re not annoying me at all, i love getting asks :))

well my opinion isn’t very popular on here so this may open a can of worms but... personally, the only theory that truly makes sense to me is that richard iii did them in.

before i continue i just want to clarify that i do not think r3 was a cartoon villain, i don’t think he was evil or that he enjoyed killing children, and i do find him to be an interesting person. there’s a few different reasons as to why i think it was him.

let’s examine the first reason: the motive. richard has just succesfully deposed of edward v, yes, but this didn’t mean that he or his brother were no longer threats - there were still many who thought the titulus regius was bullshit and that richard was an usurper. throughout history there have been many monarchs who had far more support or more acceptable reasons for taking the throne than richard did, and their predecesors still did not stop being a threat until they were dead. richard himself saw how much trouble keeping henry vi alive caused his brother. he also probably knew that henry’s death was in fact an assasination on his brother’s orders - which, tbh, this is speculation territory now but i always wondered whether this event may be what influenced richard to do away with the princes in the way that it happened. there was also a failed attempt to free the princes from the tower shortly before their disappearance - which i imagine was probably what sealed their fate (if richard hadn’t already decided on getting rid of them). out of anyone, richard had the strongest motive for wanting the princes gone.

now let’s discuss the second reason: the means. richard was the king of england, he had complete control of the tower. he’s the one whose orders were being followed, and i imagine he made sure that the people in charge of the princes were utterly loyal to him. not only did he have the best postion out of anyone if he wanted to carry out a secret assasination of his wards, i’d argue he was the only one who could do it succesfully. i’m sorry but to me the idea that somebody, irrelevant on whose orders, could just waltz into the tower, kill its two most guarded prisoners, carry out their bodies without anyone noticing and bury them somewhere, and walk away unharmed with no one having any clue as to what the hell happened??? is extremly unrealistic. the only other possibilty i could see is the assasination being ordered by buckingham due to his closeness to the king; but if so, if he had been acting on his own, why did richard not expose that before his execution? it would have likely stopped many of the accusations of him murdering his nephews.

i’d also like to point out that this is the man who, after being accused of poisoning his wife, very publicly denied this. as far as i know not only did he not deny murdering the princes, he never spoke of them at all after their disappearance. if he was truly innocent, it seems to me that he would have done all he could to prove his innocence.

finally, there is the behaviour of the princes’ maternal family, the woodvilles. a few months after the princes’ disappearance, plans were made for elizabeth of york to be married to henry tudor once he took the throne. if the woodvilles had thought there was even the slightest chance that the princes were are alive, or that richard had nothing to do with their disappearance... i highly doubt that it would have come to this. people argue that elizabeth coming out of sanctuary with her daughters in early 1484 was a sign of goodwill towards richard, which it very well may have been, but it’s a huge leap from that to “elizabeth woodville was now certain richard had nothing to do with her sons’ deaths and was now his huge supporter”. don’t forget that even if she believed he hadn’t done it, he still executed her brother and her son richard grey, which people like to forget about. it was also in response to the woodvilles trying to excercise power through the young edward v that this whole mess started, so i don’t think that everything was all fine and dandy and water under the bridge between elizabeth and richard.

there are still things i don’t understand - why frame it as a disappearance? why not say they died of an illness? - but overall, yeah, i believe richard iii ordered them killed.

[writingat-night]

i'm sorry hawks did What Now

[silversatoru]

Ok ok- don’t judge me but get this- College AU, Where Ereh and his friends all go to a nearby maid cafe and turns out his s/o works there, and his s/o is wearing a EXTREMELY short maid outfit and she starts to flirt with Eren’s friends, and basically Eren had enough and dragged his s/o to a bathroom stall, and fucked them calling y/n their little slut, etc. and fucked them so hard they couldn’t work the rest of the day- BYE- 🏃🏻‍♀️ 💨 🚪

maid cafe

a/n: i would never judge you for this???? your mind is incredible and this idea has corrupted my brain for days,, please send more of your wonderful ideas to my inbox. and please let me know what u think bc i truly hope i did u proud

eren yeager x female maid cafe!reader

synopsis: eren and his friends go to a maid cafe and his new girlfriend is their waitress — so he drags her to the bathroom and makes sure she knows who she belongs to

tags/warnings: smut, dom/sub, degrading, mild humiliation, mirror sex, public sex, mentions of drug use

word count: 3.4k

“hey, we should check out that maid cafe downtown. i heard the waitresses are fine,” jean smirked as he proposed the idea, passing a blunt he’d just finished rolling over to eren.

eren graciously accepted the weed, but clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes at jean’s new idea for their friday night. a maid cafe wasn’t particularly up his alley -- he’d just started dating you a few weeks ago and didn’t have any interest in drooling over other women all night. but he was bored and if everyone else wanted to go, he supposed he’d tag along too.

“hell yeah, pretty girls in short skirts sounds good to me,” connie jived, a giddy smile on his face as he blew out some smoke from his own blunt.

“don’t you think that kind of place is a little disrespectful, guys? we shouldn’t view women as-”

“you’re too uptight armin, maybe we can find a nice girl to suck you off and loosen you up a little bit” jean laughed and cut him off as the blonde boy continued to give his immature friends a disapproving look.

“whatever i’m in, just let me finish this first,” eren held up his blunt and took another long drag, “i wont be able to stand you assholes all night if im not high”.

the four of them hung around their shared four-bedroom college apartment a little longer, finishing up their smoke sesh and flinging half-assed insults at one another. the sky was already getting dusky by the time they actually left and were walking through the small, bustling town surrounding their campus. the cafe wasn’t too far, maybe a thirty minute walk, but it was a beautiful spring night and shit, gas is expensive.

armin’s face was horribly flushed when they finally arrived and entered the front door, the poor boy completely unable to even make eye contact with the hostess standing in front of them. his shyness earned him a swift elbow from eren — his way of telling the blonde boy to relax a little bit.

the young hostess spoke to them in a sing-song tone, her hair perfectly curled to frame her face and her cheeks pink with blush. connie and jean completely ate up everything she was doing, gawking at her like a bunch of losers who hadn’t gotten laid in way too long — which is exactly what they were. eren was almost relieved when she finally sat them at a table and walked away, because he couldn’t stand to listen to jeans' horrendous attempt at flirting any longer.

everything on the menu had cute names that matched the theme of the cafe, and while eren and armin browsed the options, connie and jean continued to whisper about the different waitresses and which one they hoped they got.

as for you, it had been a pretty uneventful night, normal customers and nothing too crazy — that was until you walked up to the newest table you were assigned and saw your boyfriend and his friends sitting around the booth. eren and you hadn’t been dating all that long, a few weeks at most, and you hadn’t even met any of these friends yet. anxiety began to pool in your chest, but you tried your best to put on your best voice and greet them like they were any other table — after all, eren was staring so intently at the menu that he hadn't even noticed you yet.

“welcome home, masters! can i get any drinks for you?” you push your voice up to a high octave and make sure to draw out the word masters — it was the opening line that every waitress was required to use by the cafe.

two of the four boys are ogling at you so intensely that they might as well have drool hanging off their desperate lips. a third boy is keeping his eyes fixated on the table as if he doesn’t want to look at you — which is something you’re not quite used to. and eren is staring at you with his mouth gaping open, which he quickly shuts before any of his friends can notice.

he decided to sit back and watch, an amused look on his face as you continue to flaunt your extra-girly facade. he decides that now isn’t a great time for introductions to his bonehead friends — plus he knows you’re nothing like this in real life, so it’s entertaining to watch you act so out of character.

not to mention you look hot as fuck in your skimpy maid outfit — the tight corset-like top hugged your breasts perfectly and your skirt was so short he could practically see the base of your ass cheeks. he could definitely get used to seeing you like this.

but his amusement quickly started to fade as connie and jean shamelessly showered you in compliments and flirted with you like their lives depended on it. and what makes it worse is you’re playing along — he gets that it’s your job but still, can’t you just tell them to shut the fuck up?

he shoots the two idiots across from him a dirty look as soon as you walk away, “hey dumbasses, cut the girl a break”.

“hey man, i didn't hear you call dibs or anything,” connie raised an eyebrow at him.

“yeah dude, we’re just fucking around, chill,” jean added, a light laugh hanging off his last word.

eren couldn’t do anything but roll his eyes in response. he didn’t want to outright expose your relationship yet but he wouldn’t be able sit here and watch this all night either.

his blood was practically boiling when you returned with a tray full of their drinks. connie and jean turned their charms right back on for you, and fuck, if he had to hear you call them “master” one more time he was gonna lose his mind.

“armin get the fuck out of the booth,” he glared at the blonde boy, practically pushing him out of the booth so he could get to you.

armin yet out a small yelp, clambering out of his seat and letting eren climb out after him. the dark haired boy gave you the sweetest smile, but his eyes were lit up like flames.

“hey, mind showing me where the bathrooms are?”

you find yourself frozen in place for just a second, but quickly recover and give him a quick “of course master, follow me!”

the two of you walk to the bathroom in silence, but you can practically feel the heat radiating off of eren.

when you reached the restrooms you opened the door for him and bowed your head, but he grabbed your wrist and yanked you inside behind him, earning a small yelp from you. you noticed him snap the lock down behind him, and before you could even question his motives you were backed into a wall with his lips working roughly against yours.

“so this is what you do all day? walk around with your ass hanging out while calling people master?” he growled in your ear while moving down towards your neck and placing violent kisses along the sensitive skin.

“i- ah- if it bothers you-“ you breath out between gasps, your hands pressed defensively to his chest, “god, you reek of pot, eren”.

“no, it doesn't bother me, i love watching you flirt with other men. but let me remind you who you actually belong to now,” he murmured, voice dripping with sarcasm as he nibbled up to your ear and his hands fondled with the zipper at the back of your uniform.

“eren!” a strangled yelp leapt from your throat as he unzipped you and let your costume fall around your ankles.

for a second you thought about trying to stop him, but his hot lips against your cool skin was starting to win you over. your neck was undoubtedly covered in bruised love marks now, your skin aching in the most beautiful way.

“take it all off,” he mumbled into your ear as he snapped the strap of your bra against your skin.

“we’re in a bathroom eren, i don’t-“ you tried to reason with him, but any inkling of a rational thought was long gone from his mind.

“what’s with all the protests? you had no problem following orders when my friends were the ones giving them,” he cocked an eyebrow at you and lifted his loose shirt over his head in one swift motion.

you could have retorted or made a jab back at him, but your attention was caught up in the perfect lines of eren’s physique. between the sculpted curves of each of his muscles, his dark hair tied in a loose knot at the base of his neck, and the evil smirk across his lips, you were rendered indefensible. everything about eren was so intoxicating, and the idea of letting him have his way with you right now, in this bathroom, was starting to sound less and less like a bad idea. you weren’t sure how long you’d been staring and admiring when his lusty voice filled your ears again.

“did you forget how to use that pretty mouth of yours? i’m sure i can give you a little refresher,” he faked a frown and pointed to the floor with his index finger.

without a shred of reluctance you sunk to his feet. he had you in a state of utter compliance now, and all he had to do was mutter a few arrogant words and take off his shirt — you were almost ashamed, almost.

after a few smooth movements of his fingers against the drawstrings of his sweats, the tip of his member was hanging mere centimeters from your face. you glanced up at him with giant eyes as he stared down at you with his clouded ones. between his raging hunger for your body and the high that was still clouding his mind, there wasn't a single coherent thought in eren’s head other than the way your lips would feel wrapped around his cock.

“open up, princess. if you wanna act like a slut, i’ll treat you like one,” he grabbed the back of your head and forced it forward.

your lips parted without even thinking, and he thrusted his full length down your throat without any warning. you were left coughing and sputtering, the walls of your throat constricting against his cock and sending a few curses from his lips.

he slowed down slightly after that, but kept a steady pace as he mouth-fucked you until tears were leaking down your cheeks. you were gagging and coughing and your face was stained with salty saline but you loved every second of it. his head rolled back as raspy grunts fell from between his teeth, his fist tightening at your scalp.

after he thought you’d finally had enough he pulled back and released your hair from his steel grip. his cock was aching now, coated in a thick layer of your sticky saliva and yearning for more.

“get on the counter,” he ordered, and you scrambled to your feet in a way that was embarrassingly desperate.

you boosted yourself up onto the cool countertop, positioned perfectly between two sinks and leaning back against the mirror. eren placed a firm grip on each of your legs, shoving them open and snickering at the slick patch of fabric between your thighs.

“you like being treated like a whore, don’t you?” he clicked his tongue off the roof of his mouth and reached down at your panties before yanking them off in one fell swoop.

he squatted down so his face was level with your cunt, sticking out his tongue and dragging it up to your clit with antagonizing slowness. he moved the warm muscle up and down, sliding it between your folds and in circles around your clit — but his tongue was just barely making contact. and every time you bucked your hips towards him, begging and yearning for just a little more he’d pull his head back and click his tongue at you.

you were aching, leaking, and so incredibly needy for him and he knew it. he’d transformed you into the crumpled mess laying before him in a matter of minutes, and he was very proud of it.

“i’d start begging if i were you, or i’ll leave you here like this — a stupid broken slut with no one to fuck her,” he stood up and cocked his head to the side before beginning to tease your entrance with a single finger.

“ah- eren, please! i’ll do whatever you want,” you whimpered at him, a pitiful look on your face.

“eren? you know you’re not supposed to call customers by their name here,” he shook his head, “you’ll have to do better than that”.

“please- master, use me however you want. just please fuck me already”.

that seemed to suffice for eren, because after that it didn’t take long for him to shealth himself inside you and have your sweaty back slamming into the glass mirror behind you. strangled moans and pitiful whimpers slipped from between your lips, your eyes rolling back into your head in complete bliss. he’d teased and tormented you for so long that the sudden intense stimulation was almost too much.

he fucked himself into you so hard you thought you might break — your legs ached and your back hurt from awkwardly leaning into the mirror. but those feelings were quickly pushed to the back of your head because the overwhelming pleasure was so forceful that you could barely focus on anything else. eren’s length was grinding deep into your aching caverns so good that it was completely clouding your brain.

you let out a stifled gasp when he abruptly pulled out, leaving you feeling empty and aching for more.

“why-,” your voice was so destitute and so, so desperate.

“shut up and stand in front of me,” he commanded, pulling you off the counter and twisting you so you were facing the bathroom mirror.

“look at yourself in the mirror and watch me fuck you,” he practically snarled, placing a palm on your back and pushing your chest down against the counter, “look at how much of a slut you are for me”.

the only response that came out of your mouth was a tiny whine of acceptance — it was pathetic.

a breathy moan fell from your lips as he slid back in, and your cheeks blushed a dark shade of red as you watched yourself get fucked from behind. it was embarrassing, humiliating even, having to see yourself like this, but what made it even worse was that you fucking liked it.

“look at yourself,” he nodded towards the mirror, picking up his pace and tightening his grip on your hips, “just a dumb whore who’s good for nothing but taking orders from other people”.

“only- you!” you let out a strangled yelp.

“what was that? i don’t think i heard you,” he thrusted hard, reaching deeper than he had the entire time and then leaning over your back so his head was positioned right next to yours.

“say it again,” he murmured, burning holes through your eyes with how intensely he was staring at you in the mirror.

“i’m a dumb whore, but only for- you,” you repeated, squirming and whining at the painful pleasure he was forcing into you.

“that’s right,” he flashed you a satisfied grin, standing back up and resuming his original pace.

the sudden shift had you clawing at the smooth countertops — desperately wishing you had a pillow or sheet to grasp onto for some kind of support. you flinched when you felt a couple of his cool fingertips find your clit, immediately rubbing hasty circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves.

“i want you to come for me,” he locked eyes with you in the mirror again, “and i want you to think about how i’m the only one who will ever make you feel this good the entire time”.

his words were harsh but they sounded like honey when they flowed through your pathetically devoted ears. between his consistent thrusts and the pads of his fingers working their magic, you were a pitiful mess of whimpers and moans in a matter of minutes. your body twitching and legs shaking as you mumbled his name over and over — it was the only word your brain could comprehend right now.

seeing you like that nearly pushed eren over the edge himself, but he forced himself to last a little longer, wanting to milk your orgasm for everything that it was. he was genuine when he said no one else would ever make you feel the way he could — your head was spinning and your body was on a high that felt like it would never end.

only once your body finally fell limp and tired, signifying that your climax had ended, did he pull out and spray his seed all over your exposed back. you were a sticky, sweaty mess and your legs didn’t have the strength to stand even after eren was done coming down from his own high.

your face was buried in your arms when you felt a wet paper towel cleaning up the mess of semen off your back. eren tossed the towel into the garbage and wrapped his arms under your torso so he could help your pitiful self stand up. you let out a few pained whimpers, stumbling into his arms and wrapping your hands around his neck.

“that bad, huh? how are you gonna go back out there and work for all your masters? i’m sure they’re waiting,” he smirked at you, and there was no sympathy in his voice.

“i- i don’t think i can,” you whined, clinging to him as your legs continued to shake underneath you.

eren shook his head and clicked his tongue, helping you over to your clothes and assisting you with getting back into your uniform. even after getting dressed your legs refused to work — you were a shaky, stumbling mess. you sat in a pitiful heap against the tiled wall while you watched eren get his own clothes back on.

“i think you might need a new job,” he snickered, squatting down and lifting you onto his back once he was dressed.

you graciously climbed onto his back, arms wrapping around his neck and burying your face into his neck, “yeah, yeah i’ll get a new job”.

“good idea, because everyone’s about to see how pathetic you are as we walk through the cafe,” he wrapped his arms back under your backside to support your weight.

“there’s a back exit right down the hall, please take that one,” you begged, “please”.

“well. since you asked so nicely and did so well i guess you deserve that,” he complied, exiting the bathroom and following your directions to the back door.

but because you have the worst luck in the world, one of the cafe managers came walking right around the corner just as the two of you were about to leave. you buried your head deeper into eren’s neck, unbearable amounts of embarrassment and shame flooding your veins.

“hey man, she quits, sorry!” eren yelled and handled it for you, dashing out the back door before the manager could even comprehend what he’d just seen.

“thank you,” you mumbled into his shirt, and you were truly thankful that you didn’t have to speak for yourself in there.

“no problem, princess,” he adjusted one of his hands so he could squeeze your ass, making you jump against his back, “let’s head back to my house for round two, yeah?”

“r-round two?” you stuttered.

you could barely handle round one, and he was ready to go again? how!?

“i’m joking, relax. let’s go watch a movie or something,” he chuckled, hoisting you higher on his back and beginning your long walk back to his apartment.

you sighed and sunk into his back, that sounded nice. there was a huge difference in how eren acted earlier and how he was acting now, but you were a sucker for both personalities. you expected college to consist of classes and work and maybe a few new friends but meeting eren yeager was sure to make it a lot more interesting.

[heeracha]

hii i love ur smau sm!! i just wanted to ask if u have any tips for new writers on tumblr like me,, i just posted my first enha imagine earlier and there were no likes/reblogs so i started to lose confidence if i should continue writing and stuff : ( anyways i love u and thank u in advance <3

hi honey !! thank you sm <3 omg,,, i suck at these but i will try to give you tips (and for others too sjdjsjs)

1. i'm pretty sure everyone does this, read. not just fics here, but also books. yk what i mean right? like,,, books yk, harry potter, percy jackson series, rainbow rowell books. oh, try reading classics, too. c.s. lewis books (soecifically, yes. narnia.), sonnets of elizabeth barret browning, etc. oh, lang leav. yes. how can i forget her? reading improves not only your writing, your comprehension, too. your vocabulary would widen. also, don't stick with only one author. read varieties of books from different authors, compare their writing styles, and then you'd find your own style. one you're confident with.

2. don't force yourself to write, okay? if you don't have a motivation, but you have the idea, don't force it. if you really don't want to write as of the moment, then dont. i swear, you wont be satisfied with your work. it will come to you naturally, okay? <3

3. if you're going to write a long fic like 5k beyond words or series, write down the flow of the story. like what happens,,, like this.

yes, it's wob. i dont mean to shove a promo down your throat, this is just rlly an example. 😭 it's not impossible that you would get random ideas for the fic in the most random times, if you feel the urge to write that part only, go ahead. when you get to that part, you can always rewrite it, that is if you want to rewrite it. but seriously, you don't have to write it in order. like, you're still in part three, but you want to write part seven, go ahead. write part seven, put it aside until you get to that part, reread it if ever there are some parts that dont make sense, edit it. yk? tbh most of my fics are like,,,, endings first 😭

4. proofread 😭 i swear, do it. i don't do it and i regret it most of the times because there are some little details that i forgot to put, and yknow, i really believe that even the smallest details can make a big change in the whole story. so, proofread it before posting, really.

5. as long as you're happy with how your work is, you're more than just good to post your work. but ofc pls likes comments and rbs wont hurt pls dont just like, also leave comment and rb it with feedbacks, we love hearing from you. also, if you have anyone you rlly trust to read your work and critique for you, go ahead. but it's also totally fine if you're more than satisfied <3

6. regarding with what you said, you got no likes or reblogs, here's the thing, it happened to me too when i first posted here. and the thing is, it's bcs your blog is probably new. you havent liked, rb or posted anything yet. and tumblr is making sure that u're not a bot, so im pretty sure that's what happened to you. it probably didnt appear in the tags, that's all. speaking of, tags are important too! make sure you use the proper tags so people can see it <3 dont lose confidence honey !! i'm pretty sure your work is great. <3 ily

this is short, i think. i'm sorry i suck at giving advices but these are the main points that come to mind 😭 ily honey <3 and to everyone who wants yo start off, go ahead. everyone is here for you. readers and writers. love you my loves <3

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

[miyaniacs]

this will be so much fun!!!

OKAY SOOO I’LL DO SOME OF MY FAVES FOR THIS ONE OKAY?

(repost bc it took too much time to write this to not show up in the tags numbers of failed attempts: 2 )

warnings: I guess slight nsfw and me being tipsy while writing this , all characters are 18+

characters: Kurro, Akaashi, Kenma, Oikawa, Bokuto, Ushijima, Iwaizumi, Osamu, Atsumu, Sakusa

masterlist

HC The boys find out their crush is a cam girl / has an onlyfans account

Kuroo

AYT NOW LISTEN

it was late at night and he couldn’t sleep so ... there is one thing he hasn't tried yet...

now he’s on some popular cam girl website and scrolling through the different cams

then he stops

this one girl seems familiar

he clicks on it and

JACKPOT ?! its YOU ??? HIS CRUSH ???!

but OMG. he had the best night of his life sweety

but still.. he will now definitely ask you out on a date tomorrow.

after seeing your beautiful body and the way you moan and move

HONEY NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO SEE THIS AGAIN

other than that he probably thinks it’s hot af that you are a cam girl

I mean Kuroo aka pornstar

he loves the fact that you the sweetheart for anyone else but could be the pornstar just for him

smug af the next day he sees you from afar

shy af the second you come over

Akaashi

HE DID NOT OPEN THIS TAB OKAY

he did tho but HE DID NOT OKAY?

OKAY!

so anyway - his browser magically opened his one website

and he just hear someone talk

he recognised the voice but - NO... this can’t be you right?

yeah jokes on him

he chocked on his on salvia when you walk in the view of the camera wearing nothing but some sexy black lingerie

GURL. BITCH THOUGHT YOU WERE A BABY?!

but now he knows you aren't

you definitely aren't

but he now wants you to be his babygirl

and he wants to look away.. but he can’t

soooooo ..... yeah. he had some fun that night

wasn’t sure how to look into your eyes the next time he saw you tho

Kenma

he did not find you

Kuroo did

and yes he immediately sent him the link with a voice memo of him basically just screaming

the said link lent to an onlyfans account

despite the fake user name, he instantly recognises the birth mark on your arm

yes the many times he watched you when you all were out with friends made him recognise this stuff

so did he pay to see the rest of the pictures and videos?

yes.

was he embarrassed?

oh hell yes.

was he still enjoying it?

yes.

is he now able to look into your eyes?

no.

Kuroo has to do all the magic to make him speak to you now - because you are, despite the account you got, still a shy bean who can’t talk to her crush

Oikawa

screams in the middle of the goddamn night

you - you just brought him chocolate a few hours ago?

and now your stripping in front of him? I mean you don't know that he's watching since you just do it in front of the cam

his little oik-oik is growing

he thought you were innocent?

will sent the link to IWA-CHAN

with a “LOOK AT MY CRUSH OMG”

after your lingerie is off and you took out a toy he sent another message

“WAIT NO DONT LOOK AT HER”

he will be all cocky tho when he sees you the next time

you walk up to him, saying a cute and shy “hello” and he’s just

“you haven’t been this shy last night”

you panic and run away which results in him panicking running after you screaming apologises

Bokuto

He is hyped

OMG

Poor Akaashi will probably know about all of this too

he has so much fun watching you online - imagining that you are here with him at this moment doing all of this just for him

which you secretly do since you’re also imagine him watching this

will open this website more often the following days then he would admit

i’m not sinning that much to actually write down the stuff that’s going on in his head

the next time he sees you

he does question if it was really you who he saw online

you are nothing like the girl he saw there

SOOOOOOO he straight up ask you

“hey y/n !!! are you (your username)” he smiles and tilts his head

you just black out

Ushijima

again poor baby

Tendou and Semi told him to visit this site - hot farmers advice

this baby thought he’d actually learn something he could tell you - his crush - since you recently TOLD HIM that you try to grow some tomatoes

but when the site finished loading

HE WAS NOT EXPECTING TO SEE YOU ON THERE

with nothing less than lingerie, an oversized plaid shirt AND a straw hat

you’re on all fours and the way you move and moan and talk to the camera

he wasn't really taking note of where his hand is wandering rn

soon after, you are now without a bra, he finds himself rock hard

the next day you tell him about your tomatoes WHICH ARE GROWING (!!!) he gets red af and just leaves

you look confused at a laughing Semi and Tendou rolling on the floor

Iwaizumi

he usually doesn’t do this stuff... but... it was some time until he got some

and he just wants you - so he doesn't want to hook up with some random girl

you’re pure and innocent and he accepts this and will wait for you too feel comfy enough so he can ask you out on a date

anyways he’s at this random website

and switches trough the channels to find someone he likes

and he chocks.

THIS CANT BE

YOU

he actually was about to text Oikawa but then stopped because Oikawa

he starred at the screen not even blinking

his hand is moving so fast

and all the things you say and the way you tease your viewers

omg

hny

he really wants to fuck some manners in you okay?!

awkward af the next day he sees you tho

yes talking about blushing IWA-CHAN

Osamu

his Laptop was broken

so he used Atsumu’s

WHO left this tab open

he let out a small scream, his normally stoic face falling

WHY ARE YOU NAKED ON HIS BROTHERS LAPTOP

now he sees that it’s an only fans

WHY IS HIS BROTHER PAYING TO SEE HIS CRUSH NAKED

but hey.. Atsumu’s not home... and he told him it’s okay to use his laptop..

a few minutes later he’s already worked up watching your beautiful body, his eyes following every movement of yours

he can’t really comprehend that you are the same girl that always comes to his shop, always stuttering and nervous while talking to him?

BUT HELL WAS HE ENJOYING IT

and those pictures of you in this maid uniform.

OH AND IS THIS CHOCOLATE ON YOUR BOOBIES

his imagination went wild

“OY i see you’re enjoying my present?” - Atsumu came back home

Atsumu

I mean it’s canon that he watches porn and is paying for some cam girls right?

so he’s looking for some now that look more like you - his crush.

someone cute and innocent

Gosh he loves it how easily you get flustered when he flirts with you

this one looks promising he thinks

and hell was it promising

it was you

surprise surprise

he was blushing for a whole minute baby

THAT ASS ?!

how tf have you hid that all the time?

SO many dirty thoughts

SOOOO MANY

will def call Osamu to his room

after he finished this lil problem down there obviously

Osamu is grossed out - he thought you are cool  and now he can’t look at you the same way

Atsumu tho - wont get that much sleep that night, your body and all the thing’s he’d do to you circling in his head keeping him up

is Atsumu enjoying this way too much the next day he sees you? Obviously YES

he will walk up to you, flirting, and when he’s about to leave he adds

“How about you skip todays stream and put on a show just for me?”

Sakusa

IT. WAS. NOT. HIS. IDEA.

Ratsumu sent him a link

our poor boy thought it was about volleyball and not something so dirty

he was CLEANING HIS ROOM WHEN HE OPEND IT

with the cleaning product you suggested to him

and now he sees you on his phone also cleaning

but with - with NOTHING ON ?!

he dopes the products and sits down on his bed - he knew you are beautiful but damn.. this hits different.

you with some MR. PROPER and WINDEX

PUHHH his fantasy is running wild WILD now that he sees you.. move .. and cleaning some of your toys and well

.... he needs to change the sheets and cleans again afterwards

ok so the next day... Atsumu already told you that he knows about your dirty little secret and that he sent it Sakusa to “help you two ”

Sakusa came and looked at you disgusted “You're dirty even tho you’re cleaning? that wasn't the way you’re supposed to uses those items.” he adds

“Then make me pure again?” you return ( @tendouthighs​​ about Sakusa) “- and show me how to properly use them”

[spectracully]

crash the crush.

pairings : senior student!xiaojun x sophomore student!reader warnings : profanity, underage drinking, mentions of drugs genre : fluff, a bit of crack? highschool!au word count : 4.3k

summary : what are the odds of crashing into your crush during the neighborhood-friendly run and mutual friends party?

You were pissed off when your mum said you need to work your lazy ass off. Well, if it's on the summer break, you'll most likely agree with her. But it's only the weekend, and you've been studying your ass off these days. A lazy weekend is something you earned, but your mum decided to rain on your lazy parade.

With all those groans and deep sighs, you storm off your house wearing your workout gear. Not much, only a windbreaker jacket paired with shorts and running shoes. Popping your airpods on both of your ears to blast some jams, you take some light jogging steps on your neighborhood. It's only 4.30 pm, and kinda windy, why the fuck are you doing this? That's right, because mum literally compared you to your neighbor's daughter, Giselle, who recently won a karate tournament. Now mum won't even shut up how much she wants an active daughter, not the lazy one. Yikes.

Back to the streets by Saweetie & Jhene Aiko plays, and you hear a message notification on your airpods. Still on your light jogs, you glance at the notification.

yeri<3 : yo yeri<3 : wyd

You stop jogging for a while to write your bestfriend back. It's saturday, she's probably asking you to hangout along with the gang. Yeri gets easily bored at home and in constant need of hanging out.

y/n : running  💃 💃 💃 y/n : mum said i need to be giselle

You continue your pace while waiting for her reply. You can see your neighborhood clearly now, seeing the details, since you always go to school in a sleepy state, not really noticing the environment, and also going home from school mostly sleeping in your brother's car.

The notification rings again. It must be Yeri.

yeri<3 : bitch thats a dancing emoji yeri<3 : running in a weather like this? yeri<3 : damn straight u wanna be giselle

You chuckle as you’re about to type the messages once more, the weather is fine, what the hell is she talking about? But then Yeri is still typing. 

yeri<3 : n e ways yeri<3 : party at lucas' 8pm yeri<3 : be there or be fucking square 💀 💀 💀

You sigh. There she goes. No other option than tag along with her, but it's not like you hate it anyway. Lucas' party is always awesome, you and your friends also will get a VIP pass because he's a good friend of yours too, despite the fact that you're not even in the same grade as him, he's one year above you and Yeri.

y/n : weather is nice dont jinx it y/n : fine but pick me up y/n : cuz doyoung won't let me drive his car

You send the messages to Yeri to prove her the weather is fine, and indicates that you agree to go to Lucas' house tonight, it's a great night to probably get wasted after all those tiring run mum decided to toss on you. It's gonna be fun, anyways. But the thing about hanging out with Lucas and his senior friends.. You might've developed a big fat crush with one of Lucas' closest friends, Xiaojun. 

You barely had an interaction with him, though, because he's usually the quiet and calm one in Lucas' closest friends group. Lucas himself is already so fucking loud, not to mention Hendery, the good-looking clown and moodmaker. There's also Jungwoo, the one who looks very calm but actually won't shut up once you talk to him. Mark too, the giggly one with some lame jokes. Well, going to Lucas' party tonight means you can see Xiaojun, probably getting the chances that you'll have some interaction over some boozes or something is also quite high.

After feeling all warmed up, you decide to give yourself a run around the block. Yeri's right, it's a funny weather to run. It's windy, but the more you stay outside, the cloud is getting darker and darker. You also knew that you're not really alone, who's doing this athletic bullshit in this kind of weather, you noticed that a boy is also doing this silly run when you were typing messages to Yeri. Probably just another neighbor's child being scolded by his mum of how Giselle is so athletic that his mum also wants an active son? Welp, you didn't see his face anyway, you were glued to the phone when you saw the figure running from the side.

It's not even a minute after you started running, Yeri already replied again. Is she really that bored that she doesn't have anything to do?

yeri<3 : ok i'll pick u up at 7 yeri<3 : um.. its fucking raining, y/n yeri<3 : go home and take a shower yeri<3 : pick ur clothes and put on some makeup instead yeri<3 : its saturday night, activate your hoe protocol yeri<3 : mr xiaojun is going to be there tonight

You stop running and stare at her messages. Raining? Is she drunk or what? It's not even 5pm yet and here she is, hallucinating-

Oop. There it goes. You feel some water drops on your head. Your hand. It was slow at first, but then the raindrops are getting harder and harder, it's pouring. 

"Motherfu-" you let out a curse, you should've trusted Yeri on this. As an intuitive homo sapiens with XX chromosomes, you scan through the streets, looking for some shelter to wait the rain to stop. Spotting a bus stop with a large steel canopy, you run like your life depended on it, avoiding the rain.

Finally arriving, you sigh and sit on the installed chair, typing messages to Yeri.

y/n : omg bitch ur right its raining y/n : should've pretended im dead in my room so mum wont bug me y/n : u know what after the rain ends im gonna sprint back home and take a fucking shower y/n : the universe doesnt like it when im trying to be giselle, it gave me rain instead

You sigh as you shuffle through your playlist, looking for some fun jams to pass your time through the rain, when somebody suddenly approaches you.

"Hi, do you mind if I take a seat here?" a boy asks, pointing to the chair next to you. You look up, and suddenly the next thing you wanna do is ascend your soul the fuck out of your body to the sky. 

Oh boy. It's Xiaojun. The boy you won't shut up about. He’s wearing a white loose tank and grey sweatpants, drenched in his own sweat. Oh god. This is truly an attack for you. What the fuck is he doing here? And why must you meet him at your mess like being all salty because of those running fiasco and the rain? While wearing your not-so-fashionable workout gear and not-so-tidy ponytails? Oh god.

You can feel your heart is about to explode when you realize that he is actually the person who is also doing the stupid running at this very weather, you just didn't notice it sooner because you were on your damn phone. Damn, mum was right, everything happened because you were always on your damn phone.

"No, of course! Take a seat!" you answer him, trying your best to crack your sweetest smile although it's more like sweatiest not sweetest.

He smiles back at you, taking a seat next to you, then his eyes get back to his phone, completely glued. Damn this is the only cardio that is worth it, no running, no jumping, no huff that huff this, only sitting next to Xiaojun on a rainy day on a bus stop. Wonderful.

You quickly whip up the messaging app to type all kinds of gibberish and send it to Yeri. She knows what shit is about to go down when you speak gibberish to her.

y/n : FUCKJSHSJJSKSJK YERI y/n : OH MY FUCKING GOD SJSGSJSHSKJSK

Lucky you, Yeri has nothing to do than respond to your messages, she stays put on the chat room.

yeri<3 : OMG BITCH WHAT yeri<3 : SKSHSJJSKS YOU SCARED ME

y/n : HE's FUCKING HERE AHSJSHSJEK

yeri<3 : OMG WHOS HE?? yeri<3 : THE DEVIL??? IS HE GONNA TAKE UR SOUL? SKEJSJKSKSK

y/n : XIAOJUN y/n : TURNS OUT HE ALSO LIVES IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD

yeri<3 : ASKJSJSKSK WHAT yeri<3 : HOW

y/n : KAHSKSJKS omg bitch y/n : i was sheltering myself from the goddamn rain y/n : im in bus stop rn y/n : this angel came to accompany me y/n : HE WAS RUNNING TOO OMG y/n : omg yeri just so u know if im not there when u pick me up y/n : its bc im in church getting married with my man xiaojun

yeri<3 : BITCH OMG SKSKSKSKK yeri<3 : GET MARRIED RN yeri<3 : WAIT dont waste the chance yeri<3 : talk to him rn!!!

You swear you're about to scream when Yeri sends that. She was actually right, this is your chance to talk to him, considering that you didn't really interact that much with him. But really? He didn't even say a word when he sat, probably didn't even remember your name? The disappointment slowly gets into your head.

You freeze on the spot. torn between wanting to talk to him and just let it slide, you'll see him again tonight as Lucas' house, right?

Just when you decide to give up and not say a word, he turns his head to you.

"Hey, I didn't know you live in this neighborhood too," he starts.

Oh god. If every time your heart beats fast you get a dollar, you'd probably have your own private island by now.

You try to play it cool when actually on the inside you wanna scream I LIKE YOU to his face rn. "Oh? Oh yes, my house is number 13." you answer calmly,

He cracks a smile, “13? You���re Doyoung’s little sister?”

Oh god. What the fuck is this clownery? He knows Doyoung? Why and how? At this rate you just wanna evaporate to the rain, what if Doyoung actually knows that you liked Xiaojun and he spills it? Oh god. 

You smile back at him, holding the panic you’ve been keeping since he mentioned Doyoung’s name. “Yep. I’m his sister.”

“Oh god, why didn’t I notice that earlier? I could’ve taken care of you at school!” he exclaims, and you sure you just wanna evaporate to the rain. Him? Taking care of you at school? YES PLEASE!

You let out a small giggle, trying to be as calm as possible when in reality you’re very sure you just wanna melt like a goddamn popsicle on a hot summer day. “So, how do you know my brother, actually?”

He laughs a bit, wiping away the sweat on his forehead. Oh god, he’s just so beautiful. “Well.. Doyoung and I used to be a dynamic duo in the school's choir, until he graduated.”

Oh, that. Doyoung is pretty serious about his career in the school’s choir, but you did not expect that Xiaojun is actually a part of it. Of course, he has the face of an angel, the voice is included.

“Now I know why Doyoung never let me come to his house. Turns out he has a cute- I mean, h-he has a sister, and that’s you! M-Maybe he’s afraid I’ll bother you or s-something.” he continues, stuttering a bit, and letting out an awkward laugh. You laugh again, feeling the blood rushing to your cheeks that you can’t hide no more. DID HE JUST SAY DOYOUNG HAS A CUTE SISTER? DID HE JUST SAY YOU’RE CUTE? DID HE-

But then, good things always come to an end. The goddamn rain stops. Oh fuck, no more chitter chatter with the dear crush. Just when it is the fucking time you need to hear the goddamn wedding bells, the rain decided to stop on your rain parade. Fuck.

He looks up, and seems like noticing the rain has stopped. “Well, Y/n. Lucas is having a party tonight, are you coming?”

You can feel your cheeks are still heating from his words, you shyly nod to him. Welp, maybe the rain has stopped, but this stupid crush? No. It goes on. Very much.

He stands up, straightening his white loose tank, getting ready to probably sprint back home. “Okay. See you tonight then, I’m going home. Have a good run!” he says as he walks away from the bus stop, leaving you dumbfounded. And lovestruck. That’s a win, alright.

Xiaojun slowly fades away from your view, and you’re still drowning on your pool of love. Yep, that’s it. You can’t even hold it, you quickly dial Yeri’s number to break out the news.

“What is it, Y/n? You literally left me on read for like 14 minutes straight and now you-”

“YERI LISTEN I’M GETTING MARRIED TONIGHT AND THAT’S A FUCKING FACT!” you shout to the phone, you can picture Yeri is probably goggling out her eyes right now.

“Girl, just because Xiaojun just asked you why the fuck were you running at times like this it doesn’t mean-”

“HE CALLED ME CUTE!” you blurted out,cutting her sentences for the second time,

“-you’re getting married- WHAT?? HE CALLED YOU WHAT?” Yeri yelled from the phone, now it’s pretty clear that Yeri is probably jumping her ass off right now.

You sprint your way to home, while holding your phone to your ears, continuing to give Yeri the details about the bus stop conversation you had earlier. Now she’s just yelling at you to pick the right dress and pamper yourself up, the probability you’ll marry Xiaojun at Lucas’ party is increasing. Sure it does.

-------

It’s 11.28 PM, 3 hours and a half since you and Yeri just arrived at Lucas’ house, escaping from Doyoung’s warning to you, to get back in one piece, and most importantly, sober. As if you’re gonna leave Lucas’ house sober, that’s funny, alright. You and Yeri were greeted by Yangyang and Donghyuck, who are currently setting up the table for snacks and drinks. That was probably the first time you saw Donghyuck ever setting up something, because if not, Jungwoo would’ve set his ass on fire.

The party madness has started, seems like everybody already has enough alcohol running on their system. Lucas is already losing his shirt and starts twerking in the middle of his house along with Jaemin and Jungwoo. Ah yes, the thot trio already started their thing, and all you have to do is just stay back and avoid getting dragged to the dance mess, because the chance of Jungwoo and Jaemin will start grinding at you is kinda high right now.. Considering their.. Twerking fiasco.

You sit back on the couch and watch your friends getting crazy over the playlist Yangyang made just for this event, sipping on your cocktails that Donghyuck put god-knows-what in it, he said it’s just cherry juice mixed with gin and brandy, but somehow it tastes kinda citrusy. You glance to the right, only to see Yeri making out with some random guy (probably one of Lucas’ friends named Changbin but oh well, that’s Yeri’s business).

Slightly grossed out and sad because apparently you’re not making out with Xiaojun right now, you make your way to the patio, and find the crowd that circle around a spinning bottle. Interested, you join Jeno, Mark, Renjun, Yeji, Hyunjin, Sungchan, Karina, Vernon, Hendery, and of course, the (hottest) most important person right now, Xiaojun.

“Welcome! As a newly joined member.. Truth or dare?” Jeno greets you as you take a seat between Mark and Sungchan. Well, you’d love to sit beside Xiaojun, but apparently, that seat is already taken by Hendery and Vernon.

You silently glance at Xiaojun, who is wearing a denim jacket with light-yellow knit top underneath, paired with white trousers. Damn, he looks so damn good that you wanna cry a river.

Your head comes back to the question Jeno asked. Today’s your day, be bold or bald. It’s time. “Well, I’m not gonna put my drunk antics to waste. Dare then.” you answer boldly, earning a few ‘ooooh’s from your friends.

Jeno snickers. Well, fuck. Guess you’re a bit too damn bold tonight, the realization suddenly hits you like a fucking trainwreck, Jeno is kinda extreme for games like this. Wrong choice, y/n. You gulp as you wait for Jeno to come up with something.

“I dare you to kiss Xiaojun!” Jeno exclaims, clapping both of his hands like a goddamn happy seal. Mark and Hendery are high-fiving right now, throwing whistles around Xiaojun, who is silent as a fucking rock.

Oh god. Things you’ve said about not putting your drunk antics to waste should’ve stayed in that goddamn draft. This is where Jeno takes you, even though you’re secretly happy that you finally get to kiss your goddamn crush, that shit is EMBARRASSING. If you wanna evaporate to the waters, then it’s probably the right time to do it.

But why Xiaojun though? Is your big fat crush on him too obvious?

You freeze on the spot as you awkwardly smile and stare at Jeno. This shit can’t be real. Jeno is goddamn crazy. You can feel the air is getting hot, whether it’s because the alcohol starts kicking in, or just because the blood is rushing through your head.

“Scared, aren’t you?” Jeno taunts you, sipping his beer as the rest of the group laugh except you and Xiaojun, who is currently staring at you with a questionable expression. Is he pleased? Or is he pissed? Oh god.

“I-I’m not!” you answer him, leaning to Xiaojun, gulping once more before asking him, “You’re okay with this though?”

Xiaojun smirks, “How can I say no to you?” he asks back, accompanied by a few ‘ayyy~’ from the boys, sending butterflies to your stomach. Your face is probably as red as a tomato by now.

Good god. Is this the same Xiaojun who is quiet, calm, and collected among his friends? Why suddenly he is so bold? Oh, he’s probably just drunk and won’t remember this kiss anyway.. You lean closer to him, closing the gap between his face and yours by sealing the kiss. His lips are soft yet firm, almost like a grape jelly you had earlier this afternoon, with a hint of vodka, of course.

After a few seconds, you finally pull out and linger your eyes on him. It’s beautiful, and mesmerizing. You just wish that you can see it again, and only for you, no one else. As you get back to your seat, you take one more last glance at him, that is currently also glancing at you, with his cheeks red.

Okay. You definitely heard the wedding bells, thanks Jeno. That’s probably one of your dreams, and thanks to Jeno, it came true. But unfortunately, Xiaojun probably won’t feel the same, or worse, he’ll probably forget about it tomorrow.

Everyone claps, exchanging happy exclaims and cheers as if you just said ‘I do’ to Xiaojun lol, when in reality, you were just doing the dare Jeno gave you. You gulp bitterly as the game goes on and on.

-----

It’s an hour past midnight, 1.12 AM to be exact. Thank god you’re not that shitfaced, but Yeri is. She is not even capable of doing anything anymore except being all smiley and shit, Changbin already drove her home like fifteen minutes ago, leaving you behind in Lucas’ lair. You suddenly felt the urge to thank god that Yeri made a fantastic decision last minute before picking you up, she used a taxi instead of driving. If she hadn’t, you’re probably stuck driving her home right now.

You scan through the house while leaning through the stair railings, looking for an easy target to get a free ride. Finally spotted your friends, you now have 3 choices : Donghyuck (who is currently seducing some random girl), Yangyang (who is now playing mobile games with Jaemin and Chenle), or Mark (who recently just hit a goddamn blunt, but he’s very capable to drive).

You sip your glass of water, making up your mind for your ride home. But then, suddenly someone taps on your shoulder.

“Do you wanna go home? Like, right now? I can drive you- I mean, our house is like, near.” you hear Xiaojun speaking to you, holding his car keys on his left hand.

Good gracious, is this even real? Like, Xiaojun, is actually asking you to go home with him? Is this real? Or are you just hallucinating from the goddamn weed you take 10 minutes ago from Lucas?

You stare at him blankly. He bit his lip, “I mean- If you wanna stay longer- or probably-”

“Yes, of course! Let’s go.” you smile at him, cutting off his words.

3 times in a day. Good job, Y/n! The wedding is up ahead!

He smiles and gives you a gesture, “Ladies first.”

-

The drive is not as awkward as you thought. Turns out, Xiaojun is full of surprise though, you nearly choked when he said he once formally apologized to Doyoung before he stood up to defend the dignity of Mint Chocolate Chip flavored ice cream. It’s delightful to find out that he has similar tastes as you, from ice cream flavor to music and school subjects.

Xiaojun also told you the reason why he was on the run earlier, he was bored. Damn, look at it, the difference between a forced daughter whose mum wants an active child, and a bored model-student. He said he didn’t expect to see you because he was embarrassed, he was drenched in sweat.

You can feel the butterflies on your stomach grow wilder and wilder from every word he said, or maybe it’s just the way he smiles when he talks to you? Welp, if it’s anything to do with Xiaojun, you’ll most likely get butterflies.

Just when you thought he was drunk, he is not. He’s capable of driving you home and carrying on some fun convos, also remembering little things. So.. perhaps, he is not going to forget the kiss you shared because of Jeno’s dare?

As you keep on exchanging conversation with him, suddenly it’s time to get off his car and get back to your house, get ready to deal with Doyoung’s nags and scolds for getting home this late.

You giggle as you take the seat belt off, smiling at the brown haired boy.

“Thank you for driving me home, Xiaojun. It was fun.” you say to him, waving him goodbye as you open the door. He smiles and waves back at you.

Just when you’re about to open the gate of your house, you hear the sound of slamming car doors. You turn around and see Xiaojun standing in front of you, eyes sparkling like a goddamn star. Unfortunately, it’s not Christmas.. If it is, all you want for Christmas is to stare at Xiaojun’s beautiful eyes all day, and probably get married to him.

“Um.. Y/n.. I don’t know how to say this but.. The kiss you gave me earlier, it’s kinda..” he starts, smiling sheepishly.

Oh god, what now? It’s kinda what? Gross? You swear you’ll kill Jeno if you hear that from Xiaojun.

You gaze at him as you wait for him to complete his sentences.

“It’s kinda.. Making me feel.. Things.” he finally continues, rubbing the back of his neck while looking away from you, flustered. It’s pretty cute.

You giggle at him a little, the butterflies come back, or maybe they never even left?

“Don’t laugh, Y/n. I’m being honest, I was pretty embarrassed to run into you during sheltering, and now you’re laughing at me for-”

You let out a big laugh before you pull him to another kiss. This one is a bit longer, more passionate and intimate, unlike the one you had before. He cups your cheek as you feel him smiling during the kiss.

“I’m sorry if I invaded your privacy- but your fast typing was very.. Intriguing.. I might’ve seen you texting Yeri at the bus stop.” he giggles after you pull out from the kiss.

Yikes. You feel like you’re about to burst now. He saw you texting Yeri? What kind of clownery is this? Did he see you typing- oh god, that’s too embarrassing to remember.

“No! That’s too embarrassing!” you cover your face, he laughs once more.

“Now, which church are we going to? I’m pretty sure you said we’re getting married tonight, right?” he takes your hands off your face, grinning widely.

You pout and lightly hit him, only to be attacked by his hugs a second later. Aww, finally, dreams do come true. You stay on his embrace for a few more minutes, no talking, just comfortable silence and realization that you’re on Xiaojun’s arms right now.

You glance at your watch, Doyoung would be furious by now. Telling him that you really have to go before Doyoung can rise from his sleep and beat your ass, you finally wave goodbye to him as he gets back to his car.

Finally entering the house, you’re greeted by Doyoung who’s standing in front of you, holding a bowl of salad on his right hand.

“So, kissing Xiaojun in front of my salad?” he raises his eyebrow.

You stick out your tongue as you make your way upstairs. Technically, not in front of Doyoung’s salad, because the door was closed. He’s probably looking through the window, such a nosy brother. You laugh at the thought of Doyoung getting furious while eating his salad as you get a message.

Xiaojun : so, see you at school? Xiaojun : can’t wait to hold your hand on monday ;)