#i wonder what i did to deserve this
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I’m not the person I was when you left but I could be her again if you decided to come back
#childhood trauma#love#friendship#nobody said growing up would be this exhausting#growing up#i wonder what i did to deserve this#poetry#growing up is chaotic#sad thoughts#taylor swift
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just a really stupid re8 post based on this pinterest post
#ethan winters#karl heisenberg#karl heisenberg fanart#resident evil 8#re8#re8 village#re8 heisenberg#wintersberg#if you squint#i feel like karl would 100% be the type to just annoy ethan because he doesn't know jackshit about flirting or normal social things#he thinks he's big game and a flirting connoisseur#meanwhile ethan is just wondering what he did to deserve this torment
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#this one is very easy to get strange angles with. because it's just got so many weird shapes on it#porygon#bald#even the original front-facing angle was strange and you could barely tell it's front-facing#hell‚ this angle you can at least tell what it's supposed to be#if you remember the realpokemon post. you remember#this thing also got like banned from the anime or some shit because of an episode that featured it giving kids seizures#fucking did i almost just type “seasures”?? hello?? where am i#even though it was pikachu who initiated the explosion that caused the seizures. and iirc it wasn't even that many seizures#it was like the galaxy note7. where only like 20 or so phones actually exploded but it still got banned from planes#or maybe i'm remembering Every tidbit of information here incorrectly!#y'see folks. this is why i am not a reliable source of information#because i will not be fact checking any of this and instead i'll end off the post with “but idk lol”#edit: it was a lot of seizures. and yes this justifies taking the episode off the air but i don’t feel like the pokémon itself#deserves to be banned from the anime is my point. plenty of folks still like this pokémon#hmm. i wonder if i maybe shouldn’t be spreading middle school rumors on the middle school rumors website
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Rumi, please, I beg you to take a fucking vacation...
#FUCK BEFORE THE WAR I WANNA SEE AFTER!! I NEED HER ON A BEACH WITH CARROT JUICE!!#WHAT DO YOU MEAN LOP IT OFF?!#actually for the longest i wondered why she did have a leg prosthetic and going back i can see why...#... BUT STILL!!#miruko please if anyome deserves a vacation IT'S YOU#just kiya's thoughts#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha manga spoilers#bnha spoilers#miruko#mirko#usagiyama rumi#rumi usagiyama#bnha 424
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"I'll send some men to investigate." "No, I'll have to do it myself. As always."
AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER (2024)
#natlaedit#atlaedit#natlacentral#avatar the last airbender#natla#Zuko#Lieutenant Jee#atla#the last airbender#atla netflix#natla spoilers#atla spoilers#avatar netflix#Dallas Liu#Ruy Iskandar#mynatlagifs#my gifs#Dallas' acting is so good#I love it#also poor Lt. Jee wondering what he did to deserve this#poor guy#Zuko really can be... 'difficult' 🥲#it's still insane that they've been on that ship together for 3 years#and yet Zuko never told them#asdfghjklkjhgfdsa
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mouthwashing features a mc who rapes and impregnates a woman and then crashes a spaceship full of innocent people to cover that fact up when the news gets out to the ppl she confides in and the captain tells her her assaulter wouldn't do that because he "knows him" and the mc pretends like it never happened as he is haunted by the images of his lies and deceit and cowardice and the image of his unborn child and the sound of a child's cries and the captain who failed to act cannot move himself or feed himself or speak for himself or defend himself when the mc attacks him and berates him and blames him for every lie he's ever told as the captain loses every scrap of autonomy he has left. but yeah it's about fucking. capitalism and yaoi. whatever i guess
#rape tw#tw#pulls at my hair i just feel like theres so many stories about SA that revolve around and are so obviously about SA that people just want to#ignore#it means a lot to me#what a tragic and haunting and sickening story where sa is so... forward#the entire story is about autonomy - and the lack of it#from curly feeling like hes stuck in the role as captain and has no choice if he stays or goes#to jimmy and what he did to anya#to anya and her pregnancy#and curlys end of life state#jimmy attacked anya but he stole the autonomy of the entire crew and you see every step from his eyes. terrifying#i wish things can be processed as more than just... male feelings and men kissing. that's all. anya deserves better.#this isnt even scratching the title being mouthwashing which is obviously referencing the cargo but is also alluding to the action#usually the punishment#of washing one's mouth with soap after theyve said 'a bad word'#i wonder who it was in the story that said something to some particular people that ended in them being punished... hm....#anyway.#my soapbox
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Seriously how can M*r*uders stans like random Slytherins (who tf are Evan Rosier, Pandora (is that Luna's mum and why tf is she Evan Rosier's twin in half of these), and I don't even want to discuss Regulus) and make them Actually Misunderstood Good People Who Were Forced Down That Path when at least one of them *coughreguluscough* was obsessed with Voldemort
And then turn around and make Snape an awful person?
#i saw a post with hcs about the marauders and the “slytherin skittles”#and i swear to god they gave everyone a lil nuance but snape was evil#just... how?????#im starting to wonder if they just can't accept that the marauders were actually horrible people as teens#and so in order to digest that they need to make snape awful to be like “Oh but he DESERVED it because he's So Awful”#it's just ridiculous#like i hate james but i can also acknowledge that he did ultimately love lily and harry and would have been a loving partner and dad#even if he was a fool#and i don't vibe well with sirius but i also acknowledge that he was fucking traumatised so yeah he wouldn't be the best person#why is it so hard for the marauders stans to understand that their faves tormenting a geniunely innocent child#because honestly? severus was innocent from the start#they're the ones who pushed him over the edge#I've said it once and I'll it again:#being into the Dark Arts doesn't automatically make someone evil#anyway i need to go sleep#or at least try. i got very pissed lmao#severus snape#pro snape#anti marauders fandom#(not even anti marauders as much its their fandom that pisses me off)#also#anti james potter#(just because i want to be petty UwU)#snape defense#also you know what#anti regulus black#<-whoever he was it wasnt what the fandom said#in my mind he was one of the worst out of the black cousins from an early age#(mostly as a mental Fuck You to the stans lmao)
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oh i was right that's fun. eye dude really did get shipped the quesadilla island residents to look after and instead of doing his job and giving them a perfect island experience he went rogue and started the hell-games and the federation has no idea lmao. the federation thinks its a third party interfering but so far it seems all signs point to it being egg island's equivalent of cucurucho becoming the joker
#qsmp#hey i wonder if the previous residents of egg island did that to him#that'd be fun#they gave this guy such a hard time at work he became the joker#decided that all residents are vermin and sinners and deserve to be punished#or maybe its not even egg island's :) that did it#maybe the eye is someone even higher up in the federation#because they seemed to have access to information about the residents and the eggs and it could have been transfered to him#but maybe he's like a head office type who's in charge of observations or something#and he's seen what they've been up to and has just developed an obsessive hatred#idk im just making up aus at this point but that the fun of theorising
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Do you ever think about Minoris reaction to being freed from the possession because I do a lot. Like. Imagine you were used as a puppet to torment this incredibly kind and patient boy, who didn't do anything to you except be too odd and off-putting. Imagine you said so many horrible things to him and made school unbearable. Imagine you tormented him until he finally snapped and then he saves your life. After you made his life a living hell, he just...saves you anyway. And he looks at you with big, disappointed eyes and asks you if you actually treat people like that. If you would actually make someone's life a living hell or if that was just Mogami rewriting your personality to suit his needs. And you could lie. You want to lie. But you don't. You are like that. You have done it, multiple times, too many times. You've berated and harassed people who've done nothing but been too weird, too annoying, just existed wrong around you. And you have no excuse. They didn't do anything wrong. He didn't do anything wrong. And what are you supposed to say? "You didn't deserve it" what does that even do? What would make what you did hurt less? What would make up for all the horrible things you told him? What can you possibly say to make up for it? Would you even have said sorry if he HADNT saved you? Do you even know?
And then he just tells you to change. You both know sorry isn't enough. Sorry will never be enough. There is nothing you can do to take it back. You just have to be better. And you have no idea where to start. You have no idea what being a good person even means. And you have to live with knowing somewhere out there there's a complete stranger who will always remember how you treated him, and who decided you deserved to live anyways. And you have no idea why.
So anyways how's your day going.
#mp100#mp100 spoilers#mogami arc tag#imagine being the ONLY thing about the world someone didnt have to change to break someone. like. jesus fucking christ#do you ever think about minori wondering if she'd broken down someone else like that#and she just didnt realize it because they didnt have powers#or the guts to fight back#what even WAS all that. jesus christ#asagiri minori#minori asagiri#this is not a hate post. i will be on my “YES minori deserved to be redeemed” hill until i die#and i will be screaming “MOGAMI ARC WOULD NOT BE THAT GOOD IF MINORI WASNT LIKE THAT.”#“AND SAYING MINORI WAS TOO AWFUL TO DESERVE REDEMPTION IS FUNDAMENTALLY MISSING THE POINT”#mogamis motivation being to Punish Bad People and show how that will warp you into someone who just hurts everuone and has absolutely no on#was Not a fucking coincidence.#mogami wasnt only bad because he hurt someone who Didnt Deserve It. mogami was bad because he hurt people.#i cannot word it as well as one did. sorry
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s3 episode 23 thoughts
the previous episode was SO good. but, it is true, i was distracted by the dog. it was SUCH!! a perfect episode. EXCEPT for that one thing. so i hope that today, i can face this episode with a clear head, free of judgement based on the fate of little dogs.
well, boy, i did face this episode with a clear mind, and wow. wowza. another AMAZING ep... and i will keep the angst from this episode in my heart forever and bottle it and take a nice long swig when i need my msr feels, which is basically always. wow. an exclamation point doesn't even feel APPROPRIATE, it just needs to hang in the air for a bit. (wiping tears away) wow....
let us go back to yesterday's notes, which shall commence below:
reading the episode description... so this one features murders linked to a device that alters television signals… huh. man, too many people i know don’t even have cable anymore. this simply would not work in the modern era. imagine if hulu or tubi or something made you kill people though lmao that would be silly to imagine.
we open with a guy digging a hole in the woods. always a promising start. seems he’s in an orchard of some sort? and the music is very very creepy.
okay, so just as you suspect, this dude is burying a dead guy. sometimes your gut instinct is correct and tropes are not meant to be subverted. but the dude who is burying him says “your killing days are OVER” so is this actually a justice arc??? hmm. it is not clear. man, it would be hard to dig a hole like that.
shovel murder man is at home washing the blood off. but then someone else approaches him and he kills THAT GUY TOO WITH THE SHOVEL?? huh? what is going on.
police at da guy’s house. everyone has the same face as the dude he just killed??? so they tase him. and then the faces go back to their REAL faces. now what is going on here!!!!!!!!!!
as the real faces return, the man realizes he killed someone named sarah!!! and he seems sooo upset by the fact that he killed sarah!!!! poor sarah :(
so does the tv make you see other people’s faces on the bodies of random people….? omg that’s insidious...
we now shift to a different scene, one where mulder is sitting in his car at 2 am. doing what???? waiting for some guy!!! he was waiting TWO HOURS for this guy!!! who is this guy...? it's giving blind date/drug deal.
the man who enters his car gives him a newspaper clipping about the murders we just saw. and mulder came here after getting AN ANONYMOUS EMAIL in the middle of the night??? this is crazy because literally so many people want him dead and this would have been a very easy way to accomplish that goal. wow. seriously, no self-preservation instincts on this guy.
mystery man says he has no obligation to explain what is going on, but if mulder walks away from it, more people will die. so no pressure!! xx
cutscene to a hospital, where mulder is watching our murderer through glass, while scully comes in saying that she is sorry she is late, but “the beltway was a parking lot”. beltway refers to interstate 495! thank you wikipedia i love your services!
murderer is named joseph. and he claims to have been killing the same guy over and over again, and that he wouldn’t die. which seems pretty awful.
OH! and the week before, in the same town, a babysitter attacked the kids she was watching because she thought they were WOLVES??? omg that is horrific??
they’re talking to the physician, dr. stroman, who says perhaps this was provoked by amphetamine abuse. then joseph starts SCREAMING. he sees a guy on the TV- miriskovic- sorry y’all idk my post-soviet history 💔 (update: i googled it, i don't even think that guy was real because all the results are links to wikis on this specific episode... reveals how little i truly know)
anyway, seeing that guy's face on the TV seems to have triggered the screaming situation. does he have trauma from the country he used to live in and seeing references to it makes these things happen…? that would be a wild episode. put me in the writer's room and let me cook.
scully quickly picks up on the fact that this case is Weird, and mulder admits it came from some random guy, which makes her suspicious. but they go to the crime scene, and, like always, he lifts the crime scene tape up over her head, and it’s very charming despite the lack of sensibility in going down this whole rabbit hole.
the minute they get in, they hear screaming and a gunshot! but it’s just some kids watching TV??? eating popcorn in a crime scene??? LMAO WHAT?
mulder kicks them out and scruffs one of the boy’s heads... ohhhh he needs to be a father so bad huh... like i have been saying this since s1 he just has a Need to tease and spoil children. well, we can unpack that another time. there's crime afoot.
so he watches the tv and it starts to go all static-y because a guy outside is fixing the wires. scully finds a TON of tapes and they’re just shelves and shelves of cable TV shows!!!
“there must be hundreds of videos here”, she says, to which he asks “anything good?” <- idk why this made me giggle. it sounded like he was gonna put one in and chill for a bit lmao
scully starts to wonder if seeing the cable news, like joseph had recorded, was what triggered his episode back at the hospital. ooooh! a theory!!!
cut to mulder watching a tape in the bed of his motel, making an absolute pile of sunflower seeds- this dude is gonna attract mice or something someday omfg- and also he has a cola which is peak american culture. LMAOOOO he has a HUGE pile of tapes on the floor i’m crying... my type A self could NOT deal with him!
he says he watched 36 hours of bernard shaw and bobbi batista and is now also ready to kill someone as scully welcomes him into her room, which also has cola but is much more nicely organized! she found something weird on the tapes from late april, each a night when he committed a murder
AND WHY DID MULDER GET ALL COZIED UP ON HER COUCH?????? hooooooly fuck i have never seen such a baby girl of a man
OMFG??? all the reports from the murder nights feature that miriskovic guy!!!
so did seeing violence make him violent? mulder says no, and that theory assumes that “americans are just empty vessels, ready to be filled with any idea or image that’s fed to them like a bunch of pavlov dogs, and go out and act on it” oh if only this man could see the news lately……… insert ben affleck smoking a cigarette image here to describe the things we see in our current age. mulder you would not believe.
he’s really bashing her theory, but she’s saying maybe he was high and seeing these things sent him on a spiral- makes sense to me
he is leaving to go get some sleep (after admitting he can’t explain what is going on!!! which always endears me) but scully says she is going to watch the rest of the tapes… a herculean task for our girl
middle of the night and it’s still tape time for scully, but she hears the phone ringing. she hears mulder having a conversation. and he says “no, she doesn’t” which is weird… that is suspicious… what doesn't she...
scully chews her ice which is so funny because me too sometimes. she has chewed all of her ice and must fetch more. and get a cola ofc!!! nothing more american than a cold soda iktr!
but she sees mulder in his car??? lighting up with cig man???? HUH??? and handing over a tape? omfg this is crazy. i assume she is hallucinating though, because no way….
cutscene to a lady named helene watching “the price is nice” (lmaooo) and washing some dishes. but the soap in the dishes starts to look funny- and everything is glitching around her!!! she sees a man outside in a hammock… kissing a woman!!! and oh, she is furious!! she gets her SHOTGUN?? this has escalated very fast. and we hear some shooting!!!
scully is still very visibly disturbed. mulder is reporting the murder, but she seems like a shell of herself. she checks the ash tray in the car, and there is no ash… she notices the car has been moved and he says he got a paper…. why do you ask…. “nothing. it’s nothing” OHHH THIS IS JUICY
so the crime scene has a very bloody hammock. and a dead man, who the wife claims he saw in the hammock with a blonde. but the only other creature at the scene was a dog!!!
OH!!! the hammock man wasn’t even helene's HUSBAND??? this really is LAYERED!! she killed the NEIGHBOR thinking it was her husband, who wasn’t even in town!!!!!! how do you mess this up so badly?
despite the fact that scully is clearly suspicious of mulder, she is sharing the umbrella with him in their usual fashion, and the sense of tension this produces is delicious
they go to investigate the crime scene and mulder finds some sort of bike and immediately climbs upon it while proclaiming that television does NOT cause violence (LMAOOO HE IS SO WEIRD i need him.)
they find a bunch more tapes and AGAIN the same guy is messing with the cables outside while they're investigating!!!! mulder is in chase mode!!!! but he cannot chase this dude in the van!!! no man, even a track star such as him, can outrun a van carrying secrets!
scully is trying to fast forward the TV and she looks out to see mulder climbing the pole…. average day for a man like him. he finds a weird cable scrambler in there. she wants to send it to the crime lab, but he says he’ll do the analysis, and she should go interview helene the murderer. OH... she is so suspicious, she just wants to go home…. scully :((( mulder is deeply confused as to why she is being so weird
so he takes the thingy to the lone gunmen, who say it looks like it’s used for blocking premium cable channels, which i didn’t even know was a thing, you learn so much with this show. but it doesn’t block anything!!! HOWEVER, if you compare a tv with the machine and one without it, the one with the machine is slightly different. hmm...
“you know how television works?” “yeah, you click it on, you have a picture” <- the man who said that line went to oxford btw
it seems that this cable blocker thingy is adding some sort of frequency, but they can’t tell what… hmm.
mulder on the road. scully calls and only asks “where are you” in this very flat and creepy tone and OH i’m scared!!!!
he tries to explain that there is some sort of signal being introduced to the tv- he even says she might be right about the tv inducing violence theory! but she isn’t answering… she hears a clicking, like they're being listened to, and she says he never went to the detective…. let’s wait and talk on a landline, he says.
despite being in his car many miles away, he can tell that there is something very wrong with scully. he says don’t go anywhere, he’ll be right there, and redials after she hangs up. it's very much echoing when she said something similar to him in his crazed gargoyle quest.
but she is so scared, she rips the phone out of the wall and takes it apart!!!! and then the lamp too, and the table. she is checking everything for any sort of bugs!
holy hell, we have never seen her like this before... but i’m actually gagged because she is usually relatively stoic and seeing her paranoid is so different, but it also feels very natural??? she is acting her ass off here as she rips up everything in this motel room. big shoutout to GA, i love your work.
and the static that set in helene's vision earlier is setting in hers now!!! she hears a car pull up and drops to the floor…. she hears a man say “she’s in here” and a pounding on the door.
OMFG someone tries to open the door and she FIRES 4 SHOTS RIGHT AWAY??? but it’s mulder!!!!
(author's note: i was thinking after i finished the episode, and we know that she is a good shot- remember how she hit just the right angle to knock mulder out but not kill him at the end of s2? so she is either SO out of it that she cannot even aim straight, or there is a tiny tiny tiny part of her that still thinks that mulder isn't worth killing. please mull over which option brings you greater angst)
he’s coming in with his gun and his hair is blowing in the wind and he can’t FIND HER!!!!! it was really very dramatic. hair blowing in the wind has this effect.
cutscene to scully’s mom’s house, and we see a picture of young scully on the table... AWW stop she’s so cuuuute and one of missy as well 😭😭😭
OH! it’s mulder on the phone calling mrs. scully in the middle of the night!!! NOOOO he has to tell her that he doesn’t know where she is :( NOOOO poor mrs. scully has gone through too much. he feels SO bad breaking this news, that he even apologizes for hanging up right away, something he never ever does. he must be in deeeep distress to do such a thing.
and why does he hang up?? because SKINNER IS HERE!!! he’s leading a manhunt for scully, and mulder is saying she shouldn’t be hunted like a convict… but skinner says dude SHE FIRED FOUR ROUNDS AT YOU AND SOME RANDOM GUY last night!!!!
despite this, mulder insists that he can get her to listen to him if they just keep her safe; she’s suffering from some sort of paranoid psychosis. skinner is being quite patient as he tries to explain that the video tapes made her do it. skinner says well... you better find her before these guys do.
GASP!!! he’s putting up the x on his window! and doing that thing where he bounces his basketball because he cannot relax!!! stop i'm emotional!!!!!
the lone gunmen call to say they found something on the tape…. and it induces electrical activity…. MIND CONTROL???
but why wasn’t he effected?
! MULDER LORE REVEAL ! HE’S RED-GREEN COLORBLIND???? THIS IS AN INSANE LORE DROP TO GIVE NEARLY 4 SEASONS IN??????
wait, is this just for plot purposes, or is DD actually colorblind and they decided to roll with it? because now i’m gonna be looking at all the red-ish things we see on screen (like his tie he is grabbing to emphasize his point) and wonder, can he see that? how does this impact his tie selection process....
okay that really threw me off guard. man, i was getting to think we'd never get another lore reveal, which is a shame because i quite like formatting those facts in that way. good to know we could get more at anytime!
he gets a phone call from maryland state police. the lone gunmen ask if she’s okay and he says no, he has to go and ID the body. WHAT!!!! WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!! he is trying to keep composed. holy fuck………..
(heavy breathing as i grab your shoulder and squeeze) hey man. hey. he was trying so hard to be strong.
so he pulls up to the morgue and stops before he gets out of the car, and holds his head above the wheel STOP I’LL CRY???? i’ll cry… what are they putting him through??? losing her again……..
(i mean i have SEEN gifs of scully in seasons past this one, so i know she's gonna pull through, but HE doesn't know that, and must be reliving the worst days of his life AGAIN, and aughhhhh!)
but the mystery guy from the start of the episode that give him the info on the muders pulls up and says get in right now!!!!!! mulder is furious, he says he’s busy. in a shocking display of insensitivity, mystery man says he does not give a fuck. mulder is yelling that this is all his fault. mystery man says “they” are destroying the evidence, and they’ll finish it by tomorrow if he keeps searching for her, but he kicks the door shut and ignores him.
(omg…. he loves her enough to break him out of his bloodhound mode… the dogged ahab-like quest for answers and revenge… i’m getting flashbacks to his conversation with missy in one breath…….. realizing he needs to put the ones he loves before his need for revenge sometimes..... wow)
so he walks into the morgue, and the dude in there says they found a body nude and shot in the forehead.
he closes his eyes to try and brace himself before taking a peek, to prepare to see her lifeless, probably reliving those many hours by her bedside when she was in the hospital, trying to imagine her shot in the forehead, the scully he knows and loves with her dry humor and her teasing smile and caffeine dependency, the her that is so full of life, lifeless…
but it isn’t her. PHEW!
despite this being good news that he has to share- she's not dead! her mother isn’t answering her phone…. so he goes to her house. and i'm thinking, oh my gosh, did she do something rash in her grief?
but mrs. scully answers the door and claims dana isn’t here. he bursts in and says he needs to see her right now. omg, he saw right through her lies.
(also, it always feels weird to refer to her as dana, but moving on)
NO!!!! she has him at gunpoint and says he’s here to kill him!!! poor guy looks so flabbergasted… and her mom is trying to get her to please put down the gun, and he’s trying to explain what is going on!!! he is so singularly locked into her….
“he’s lied to me from the beginning. he’s never trusted me” “scully, you are the only one i trust” AUGHHHHH (rips my clothes off of my body in biblical levels of grief)
“you’re one of the people who abducted me” AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (rips off not only my clothing but also my hair as i experience emotions that rival what job from the bible went through)
she’s CRYING, and saying he killed her sister while her mom gets between him and the gun… and she’s saying she knows she’s safe here, that’s why she came here, and to put the gun down. and she falls into her mother’s arms sobbing.
WHAAAAAAAAT. and he had to watch all that… oh my scully oh my goodness my poor scully…
timeskip a little bit. he shows up to the hospital where scully is with her mother, and mockingly puts his hands up in surrender, because he is so STUPID and he always has to make a joke, and i love him so terribly, so so so terribly, because he loves HER.
she's laying in the bed, and he shuts off the tv and asks how she’s feeling. she says she is ASHAMED- as if being a victim of mind control was a personal failing. scully, i want to yell, you have NO REASON to be ashamed, let me take all the shame from you and carry it elsewhere. she says it was like the world was turned upside down.
and he makes ANOTHER stupid joke about the world being out to get him, and now she knows how he feels-
before leaning in and explaining how joseph, the first murderer on this case, became convinced he was killing the bosnian war criminal who people called “the modern hitler”, which was especially important to him because both of his parents survived the holocaust. hence his line about the killing days being over!!!
and helene was scared her husband would cheat on her. so somehow the TV signal turned their worst fears into a living nightmare.
OHHHH HER WORST NIGHTMARE IS HIM BETRAYING HER. HIM BEING RESPONSIBLE FOR HER GOING MISSING AND LOSING HER AUTONOMY AND MEMORIES... wails into my shirt.
(this reminds me of that episode in s2- irresistible- when we learn her biggest fear is that humans are capable of terrible horrific things and grasping to trust despite that knowledge. we’re seeing that again right here. how uncertainty seeps in)
THEY CALL HIM THE CANCER MAN!!! wow very official canon recognition of the name (yeah it’s happened before but it happened again so that is cool) anyway she says she saw him giving cancer man the tapes and reporting.
he says that maybe cancer man was behind this, but then he whispers “why don’t you try and get some rest?” and there is something in me that melts so entirely as he leaves her to sleep.
(perhaps it is the fact that hurt/comfort and whump are my favorite tropes. because is there anything more intimate than letting someone see you at your most vulnerable, and them choosing to love you at it? is there any feeling more cutting than seeing your loved one suffer and knowing you’d stop the world for an instant of their relief? the terrible desperation of both parties, the wordless connection upon recovery, someone being the last thing you see before everything fades to black and then the first person you see when you return... yeah. it’s cathartic. but also it makes me want to yell and cry. pls give me all the hurt/comfort content)
so the doctor found high serotonin levels in her that maybe can be associated with mania, but now they’re back to normal. he asks if someone in her situation would be diagnosed with amphetamine abuse, and she says no. then he quickly calls the hospital where joseph is staying… what is he cooking in there…
he wants to talk to joseph's doctor, dr. stroman, who left behind only a number from the motel…. and he had JUST checked out…. so he’s going through his stuff. and asking about his calls. and he DOES find a cigarette in his room but a lot of people smoke so… try not to jump to conclusions juni… but the cigarettes mean one thing in this show!!! was this innocent-looking doctor behind such a cruel experiment?!
he calls and has the last number the doctor called get checked from the folks at the lab… so he goes to visit the place of residence and creepy music is playing. the dude from the cable company we saw before rolls up!!! he walks right inside the house, so mulder peeks inside. it seems the people in the house set up a trap of some sort, as they are talking about “him” showing up at 7.
he bursts in after hearing gunshots and both of the men in there are dead!!! shot in the head!!!!
who is there... but X???? X says he HAD to kill those men- he just hoped mulder would get them first. and oh, mulder is YELLING AT X!!! he is letting him HAVE IT!!! he says he is a coward, he was too scared to unveil the situation with the mind control TV murders himself….. he says X NEVER risks his own life, but he sure does make him risk mulder and scully’s.
OH! he is holding X at gunpoint. all X is saying is that he failed, and that mulder needs him. so he walks out, confident he won't pull the trigger. and he doesn't.
WHAT! i need to kind of just let that sit for a second. i need to figure out this X fellow, but i get the sense i never will…. he failed… because he chose to try and save scully…….
cutscene to skinner’s office, where mulder is giving him a report. and scully walks in and says that dr. stroman DIED IN 1978!!! when skinner asks about the killer, mulder jumps in and says he remains unknown… oh, skinner is def gonna pick up on that….
so now we see X in a random back alley. getting into a car…. WITH CANCER MAN?????? X REPORTS TO CANCER MAN??? he asks if he has completed his work, and X reports that he has cleaned out all the personnel, everything is removed, but mulder still has a device. and mulder’s source has been eliminated. but the source’s source remains unknown. oh, he’s def lying through his teeth.
OOOOOOH this episode was SO good.
oh man, my brain is racing in a bunch of different directions. scully breaking down and sobbing into her mother’s arms…. scully convinced that mulder is a traitor, that he did those terrible things to her…. mulder so scared that she was gone, bouncing his basketball, getting a call from the police department that he had to go identify her… choosing her, even in what he thought was death, over following the Truth… the sick and twisted relationship he has with X, and X with Cancer Man, and Cancer Man with the world… it’s making me think of how mulder broke into his house that one time, was going to kill him over what he did to scully, and cancer man had the nerve to say he liked mulder… OOOH my brain is just racing racing racing.
poor scully… how scared she was, how horrified afterward…
other things that are on my mind, in no particular order: the bond between scully and her mother; mulder being all babygirl on that couch; mulder hopping on that bicycle and picking up some random doll from the murder victim's house; how haunting scully's voice was when she asked him over the phone where he was; their cola drinking; mrs. scully trusting mulder no matter what; how he tried to cover the grief in his voice when he told the lone gunmen he had to go identify her body; how he kicked the door shut of the mystery man, damning the investigation to pay his respects; how his head hovered above the wheel of the car before he got out to do that; how X uses and uses him to no clear end, and what is HE doing reporting to cig man, and what was that random doctor doing conducted fucked up experiments on random people; and scully's miraculously bad aim; mulder's conviction he could talk sense into her (spoiler: he could not); her shame at being convinced he had been the one who abducted her; how terrifying that must have been; and his stupid jokes when he walked into her hospital room, with the sincerity he tries so hard to outrun and outfox breaking through in his whispered why don't you get some rest?
so needless to say, i see why this one is a fan-favorite. this is certainly one i will be revisiting in the future when i need something strong. i have a million things to think over that will stick with me Forever, and i am in no rush to move on from this. in fact, i took these notes yesterday, but in the process of editing them tonight, i have decided i am not ready for the season finale and will have to save it for tomorrow because i'm still feeling So Many Things. so stay tuned to see how that goes, because whew!
#man i did all the typing of the notes yesterday but editing them took another hour today because RAHHHHH there was so much here to unpack#and i am going to KEEP unpacking it for a while#someone please give that man a child it is becoming increasingly evident he loves being around kids#let's get him to talk about his feelings first and then he can have a baby okay? one thing at a time#OHHH WHAT is this X fellow UP TO?!?!? AUGHHH i need to know#scully. my poor poor poor sweet scully. you deserve no pain and yet such pain has been inflicted upon you.#and her poor mother :( she is just the sweetest :( the pictures of dana and missy on her bedside table...#she is so loved :( and she loves mulder too which is so important :(#WAHHHH <- more crying!!!#so good. but in case you were wondering this still didn't bring actual tears to my eyes.#i guess that is just for poor little doggies getting eaten by beasts...#juni's x files liveblog#the x files#txf
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I want to hurt a little longer because the pain’s the only thing left of her.
#childhood trauma#poetry#love#friendship#nobody said growing up would be this exhausting#growing up#growing up is chaotic#i wonder what i did to deserve this#grief poem#grief#i’m sad again#friendship loss
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Ink October day 3: Sophistry
An argument that seems plausible, but is fallacious or misleading, especially one devised deliberately to be so.
#khux#khux player#kh player#kingdom hearts#kh#kingdom hearts union x#kingdom hearts player#player my beloved#blue boi draws#ink october#ink October 2024#ink October 2024 day 3#watched a bunch of Player cutscenes for this one and Aug AUHG I love them. I always forget how much of a character Player is#but they are truly their own guy. more then even some non-renameable/customisable game protagonists#the utter guts on this kid to challenge multiple foretellers multiple times,fight both Ephemer and Skuld at the same time-#(both very powerful in their own right),AND attempt and succeeded in tricking four of the personifications of darkness themselves is… wow#they’re such a powerful fighter too. like they kick both Skuld and Ephemer’s asses,and sure they were both not aiming to kill and exhausted#from fighting Ven’s darkness BUT SO WAS PLAYER (as well as having just come from the arcade and those fights)#them fooling the darknesses too… along side their two closest friends… I wonder if there was any noticeable change between their normal#fighting style and the one they used there. Skuld and Ephemer didn’t necessarily see them fighting during the war#(only heartless or against one appoint) so I wonder if they fought like that.#the ‘argument that is plausible but misleading’ here is Player being possessed. with all the information available to them it is plausible#but we know for a fact that player is just straight up lying. making shit up. mimicking how darkness spoke before to pretend. which is ki#kinda hilarious to me like you go girl gaslight gatekeep girlboss. gaslight them into believing you’re possessed gatekeep them from dying to#trap darkness and girlboss by winning. amazing beautiful 10/10#I like to think Ephemer never realised、at least while he was alive. something in the tragedy of him never knowing.#of not recogising his dear friend through their deception. of dying thinking he failed them. that it wasn’t their choice.#and he did fail them in a way. there’s this recurring theme in Kingdom Hearts where the hurt lingers despite the memories being gone.#Player is very much effected by this with their memories of the war being gone but still suffering. Ephemer stands by the decision to hide#it thinking it spares them from the burden but it doesn’t it just takes away the context and they deserve to know what happened to them
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Corpse au case fic where the trio decided to try cracking a murder mystery, except instead of angst it's a comedy of errors where they make everything worse.
Like. Danny comes out of a portal dead and translucent and glowing, and there's charred remains of a human body on the floor. So now all three of them are freaking out, and instead of asking for help, or finding an adult, or telling literally ANYONE, they decide to just. Get rid of the body. As one does.
So that's what they do: they break out Tucker's nice shovels (because god forbid Sam's family owned something as pheasant as a shovel, and Danny's too afraid of touching their family's Patented Fenton ShovelsTM for... reasons), they find a nice desolate clearing in the woods, and then they bury Danny's body like one would a very unfortunate hamster who met their demise too soon under very suspicious circumstances. They even stay at the new "grave" in silence for a minute or five in respect and DEFINITELY nothing else, you know. And so, they bury the body, and then they (try to) forget the experience as some horrific nightmare.
And then, a year later, there's an uproar: the Amity Park's police department found the child's remains in the woods! And you see, Amity Park is not THAT big of a town, and the police estimated that the body belonged to a 14-15 year old child, and, look, there's only so many schools in a small town, alright. Obviously, the rumours start very soon in Casper High: about how the kid could've gone to their school, about how they could've died, about whether or not anybody was missing them, about their identity, and some definitely-truthworthy-would-I-lie-to-you-bro-come-on sources insist that the kid was murdered around a year ago, around the time ghosts started showing up. And these rumours obviously reach the ears of Sam, Danny and Tucker.
Now, you would've thought that their first thought would be something like "oh no, they found Danny's body", or "oh no, they know", or even simply "we're sooo fucked". Except. You see, the night they buried the body? It was really cloudy. And dark. And, y'know, it's very easy to get lost in a forest. And they were too high-strung, you see, they completely forgot to leave some sort of a marker or anything. And also like, it was so long ago, you know? A lot have happened, they were sooo busy and the likes, you can't really blame them for forgetting some things.
And here's lies the problem: all three of them just fucking forgot that there was a body left to bury at all.
And then it gets out that the police can't even conduct any sort of DNA test because it became corrupted to the point of being absolutely unrecognisable due to exposure to a large amount of ecto-energy.
It's now looks like a bad set up for a joke: an identifiable body of a child, cause of death unknown; the probable involvement of ghosts or at the very least a very large quantity of ecto-energy; a probable murderer on the loose, which naturally breeds suspicion and speculation; a town full of all kinds of rumours; and a trio of absolute dumbasses, who after hearing that ghosts were involved immediately went to stick their noses where they don't belong.
Rejoice, Amity Park! Sam, Danny and Tucker are now on the case! Except they are all teenagers, and nobody in their right mind will allow teenagers to solve a murder case. Plus, them poking around would be highly suspicious, but Phantom, on the other hand?
(people seeing Phantom helping solve this case and coming to the conclusion that the ghosts were definitely involved was not on their bingo card, but oh well)
They don't go to the cops, obviously: Danny at least in part because he's worried they will call GIW on his ass or try to arrest him, and Sam and Tucker simply because fuck the cops (one because the police is involved in a militaristic, capitalistic corrupted system that breeds injustice and furthers the divide between average people and the wealthy, and the other because cops suck and will probably call GIW on his friend's ass). They also can't go to any other authorities: cops are out of the question, as is the mayor; laboratory personnel will most likely just throw them out; and there're no witnesses or known relatives, so they're stuck.
Therefore they decide that desperate times need desperate measures, and so they enlist all of their ghost allies on a quest, hoping to find the ghost of the kid. Considering the amount of ecto-energy they were subjected to, they MUST have formed a ghost, they only need to find them.
Except. The Ghost Zone is a big place, and they only have so many allies, even if some of them are a queen and a god. So Danny bites the bullet and does the most stupid (debatable) thing he has ever done: he goes to his enemies for help. They're surprisingly understanding and willing to help, even if some of their reasons are a little... strange (Skulker and Johnny entered some sort of competition on who finds the ghost first, Box Ghost starts to seek out coffins (??) and Youngblood is not above to start torturing people to finally have a friend that is not either an adult or a complete stick in the mud). And even then they still can't find the ghost.
In the end Danny goes to Clockwork in a desperate hope that he will be able to glimpse at least a little of what had transpired on the night of the murder, and to Danny's annoyance Clockwork laughs so hard he almost pops a ghost equivalent of a blood vessel.
A few weeks down the line Sam hesitantly brings up Danny's buried corpse ("MY WHAT" "Your corpse which we buried in the woods, Danny, don't you remember?" "Yeah, bro, I think you dissociated the whole time we were digging the hole and carrying your dead body" "WE DID WHAT-"), reasonably saying that, you know, they ALSO technically buried a body in the woods. On that Tucker just shrugs because obviously it was not Danny's body, the place of the burial was way off, he remembers that there was a really big stone to the left of the grave (he doesn't and there wasn't), so they are in the clear. During that exchange Danny's sitting on the floor and having a panic attack, because he really did dissociate the whole time and afterwards legitimately forgot that there was a body to bury at all.
After that conversation all three of them leave with a certainty that Danny's body is still there where they left it, whenever it was. And so the shenanigans continue.
#yes i know that is custom made for some delicious angst and identity shenanigans#but also consider: this scenario would be very funny#three teenagers running around a crime scene trying to solve a murder case#and not realising they ARE said murder case#idk whether or not there would be an identity reveal down the line but if there would be one#i like to imagine vlad just sitting in his office alone afterwards head in hands#wondering WHAT he did to deserve this stupidity that went for MONTHS#like sir you did it to yourself when you decided to make a 14 years old your arch-nemesis#jazz is both horrified ('IT WAS YOUR WHAT') and exasperated ('what do you MEAN you forgot')#she's out there secretly hoping this sort of stupidity is not hereditary (in her case it kinda is lmao)#his parents are simply horrified (tho jack a few months down the line finds the whole ordeal rather funny)#the ghosts all forget about this shitshow rather quickly#except for ember youngblood kitty and johnny. they will NEVER let danny live it down. NEVER.#also danny waking up at 3am in cold sweat and remembering cw laughing his ass off: THIS MF KNEW ALL ALONG-#danny phantom#sam manson#danny fenton#tucker foley
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so about those timelines where flowey helped everyone. i feel like there’s some kind of division in people’s minds between those ones, the “good timelines,” and the ones after his first kill, the “bad timelines.”
first off, i really don’t think any of those timelines were “good.” not really good for anyone, especially not good for flowey. the thing about those timelines: we don’t know too much about them, but it’s reasonable to infer that flowey didn’t exactly give others much agency in them. but i’ve already talked about that. point is, he never settled. he gave himself responsibility for everything, and he didn’t let anyone move on until everything was perfect. that’s probably why he got tired. he was bored of wondering “what can i slightly change so that this solution gets slightly better?” he was tired of barely any change but still feeling like he could improve. and because he could, he had to.
the dreemurr parents put a lot of pressure on their kids. “the future of humans and monsters.” “the prince of this world’s future.” they sound rather similar. as a prince, asriel was expected to someday lead monsterkind. he was expected to be like asgore, help his subjects at any cost. considering this, it makes sense that flowey tried over and over to make everyone perfectly happy, until he couldn’t try anymore.
#at some point you have to wonder if it’s worth it#he’s been working so hard#doesn’t he deserve a break?#and i’m sure he did go back to helping everyone at some point#maybe every once in a while#but what was the point if he couldn’t give them the perfect ending?#flowey had all the time in the world#he just wanted to do something new#this is why it’s so important that he left “asriel” behind#“asriel” is the one who fell into that spiral in the first place#“asriel” is dead#if he even existed at all#if flowey had just accepted that there was no such things as a happy ending#and he decided to just live his life the way he wanted to live it#he wouldn’t have ended up the way he did#the other timelines weren’t the goal#they were little games to play#because he was sick of doing what he shouldn’t have to do#what a KID shouldn’t have to do#crap i put half the post in the tags again#maybe i’ll take a screenshot and repost#anyway#undertale#flowey#character analysis#asgore#toriel#tagging them because this is kinda their fault#not really blaming them#they did have to prepare asriel in some way
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Guess what FUCKING DAY IT IS
#smtwo thursday#OK SO. WE LEFT OFF WITH TOME AND REIGEN AND SERIZAWA GETTING THROUGH TO MOB#AND OBVIOUSLY HES LIKE DEVESTATED#i would be too i would lose my mind#Serizawa got away THANK. GOD.#KITTEN WHAT ABOUT THE KITTEN WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN TO IT DID IT LEAVE TOO?? IS MOB GONNA GET IT OUT OF THERE BEFORE HE LOSES HIS SHIT?#is Mob going to beat Teru's ass (deserved)#whats happening with shou? WHERES RITSU?? WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING WITH TOICHIROU RN???#DID HE WAKE UP#IS HE ALONE#OH wait no i think Rei is still there#yeah Rei's still there#will she be able to stop him from leaving if he wakes up? probably not but at least hes not by himself rn#will i lose my mind this chapter?#idk#all WONDERFUL questions that im sure I'll have some of the answers to by the end of this chapter#youd better believe im keeping you updated
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Outlander drawing prompts I got from Wannadraw
- Jasiri gardening
or as Deadpool
or as a model
- Madoa as a warlock
or as a popstar
or steampunk
- Janja drawing a picture of himself
or chibi style
or as a popstar
- Chungu as an evil queen (king)
or wearing an outfit made of flowers
or as an artificer
- Cheezi made of cheese (hehe…CHEESE-i)
or playing with fireworks
or skydiving
- Nne riding a dragon into combat (a komodo dragon lol)
as a demon
or as a puppet
- Tano adopting 50+ cats (bonus if they’re all disney cats)
or dancing in a music video
or as a bard
- Mzingo chibi style
or as a cowboy
or if he was one of the mean girls
- Mwoga as a lego character
or going to prom
or as a ranger
- Reirei as a bard
or rocking a ballgown
or at the Olympics
- Goigoi going to highschool (new au??)
or on Valentine’s Day
or traveling the desert
- Dogo if he was a disney prince
or sporting a giant anime sword
or as a superhero (SUPER JACKAL)
- Kiburi wearing 50’s clothing
or dressed like Nicki Minaj (WHEEZE)
or gardening
- Tamka as a model
or drawn in hayao miyazaki’s style
or on Valentine’s Day
- Nduli as a barbarian
or flying on a magic carpet
or as a Mortal Combat character
- Neema as a rogue
or running from a bear
or surfing
- Shupavu as a llama
or as a druid
or as a character from your fav video game
- Njano as a plant person
or as a wizard
or stranded on an island
- Kenge as a druid
or as a pirate (PIRATE AU?????)
or made of cheese
- Sumu going to a Ren faire
or stranded on an island
or as a ballerina
- Ushari climbing a tree
or drop dead gorgeous
or wearing a bikini (ig as a human-)
Bonus: Vitani’s guard
- Vitani falling in love with an ice cream
- Shabaha as a warlock
- Kasi cooking
- Imara in Lady Gaga’s clothes (bonus if she wears her meat dress)
- Tazama as a character from your favorite video game
Double bonus: Makuu and Hodari
- Makuu if he was two inches tall
or in a Halloween costume
or as an angel
- Hodari at comicon
or as a paladin
or wearing an outfit made of flowers
#the bolded ones are ones that i’d do if i could draw#i find it funny how nne gets cool prompts and meanwhile tano’s there with a cat army#kiburi would rock 50’s clothing but him dressed as nicki minaj 😭😭😭😭😭#i’d love to draw the outlanders in the chibi style omg#but mzingo as a cowboy could be interesting#who gave dogo a sword that’s what i wanna know#OH BUT REIREI WOULD TOTALLY ROCK A BALLGOWN#i wonder what goigoi would do for reirei on v-day awww#tamka would make a great model and nduli would be the cutest barbarian#but nduli on a magic carpet would be hilarious#cheezi made of cheese is too perfect but him playing with fireworks is so in character#neema visited the tree of life and fucked up#the rogue thing is cool tho#did not expect the dnd options tho#BUT HOW TF WOULD SHUPAVU LOOK AS A LLAMA?!?!! HFHFHGGHFFF#best make her a shapeshifter#kenge would be an awesome pirate but he’s love to be a druid so he can turn into a dragon#njano would make the cutest wizard tho#also sumu’s on the island of madagascar he’s gonna move it move it#uahari has the most normal ones but honestly he deserves it#except the bikini one lmao#though ig the drop dead gorgeous option would have to be him in a human au#drawing prompts#if anyone wants to draw any of these go ahead#the lion guard
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