#i was just sort of getting some bad vibes i feel like
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Thoughts on backwards cap Stiles?
It's a pity he never wore it in the serie, because damn what a hottie. I think it would totally give college vibes. I would've asked him out.... where he real (probably not, I don't have the courage but I would pine and crush hard)
big thoughts. lots of thoughts. many thoughts.
first of all, i feel you on the "i would totally ask him out (would stare at him from across the room and then leave when he tries to approach)" because that's me!!!!!
second of all, i honestly think he'd wear it in the awkward grown buzz phase, before his hair is long enough to gel the way he likes. the reason they had dylan wear it was because his hair was too long and they were filming from the time period of i thiiiink season one? not completely sure but it was def one of the buzzcut seasons. so it makes a lot of sense for stiles to be annoyed with his hair and shove a hat on absentmindedly, only to look...
SUPER FUCKABLE!!!!!!!!!!
good.
it gives HUGE college stiles energy, too! i have a fic rec in my inbox thats kinda like.... older boy stiles with an easily flustered reader who's got it so bad for him, and backwards cap stiles is the perfect image for that. it's totally brother's best friend, babysitter (not in a weird way omg), upperclassman, tutor sort of stiles. stiles in a role of authority or something, idk, but i'm WAY into it.
i have this secret little fantasy of writing a fic where backwards cap stiles teaches reader how to do literally anything sexual. whether it be she's never had an orgasm, or had sex, or been eaten out. i see backwards cap stiles like "??? what?? you've never ________ before?? no, no way, gotta teach you." for some reason? idk why i'm spilling my guts but yeah. while i'm at it let me just add he could totally get accidentally dominant. you're running your mouth at him and he's just like so tired has to make sure scott doesn't die and snaps "sit down and watch your goddamn mouth." and oh! heyyy!!! you're a whore btw!
also he seems so protective! like a werewolf fight breaks out and he IMMEDIATELY grabs you and pulls you away, shielding you with his body. or arguing with you "no, you are not getting involved in this. stay here." and always has eyes in the back of his head when you get in danger.
so yeah those are my backwards cap stiles thoughts. welcome to my diary i am so weird.
#I LOVE BACKWARDS CAP STILES#stiles stilinski x reader#stiles stilinski x you#stiles stilinski smut#stiles stilinski fanfiction#stiles stilinksi x reader#stiles stilinski fluff#stiles stilinksi fanfiction#stiles stilinksi imagine#stiles stilinksi smut#stiles stilinski imagine#stiles stilinski fic
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Choi Su-Bong/ Thanos
NSFW Alphabet
Warning: Talks of oral, penetrative sex, squirting, dacryphilia, mentions of drugs, Thanos just being himself.
A/N: ong I'm sick of ppl writing Thanos like he's abusive, my purple haired king would never!! But tbh he's lucky he ain't real or I'd suck the skin right off his dick ykwim
A - Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
Contrary to popular belief, I don't think he'd be that bad at aftercare. He's not amazing at it don't get me wrong, but he's not gonna just leave you alone with nothing. He definitely might offer you some sort of drug he's got on his roster, but I believe he'd clean you up and make sure that you're feeling okay and get confirmation that he wasn't too rough with you.
B - Body Part (Their favorite body part on you and themselves)
Nobody can tell me that this man isn't obsessed with his tongue oml. To him, it's a gift from the gods that he gets to use it to taste every part of you. From your soft lips to your breasts, all the way down to your cunt. He's an ass man oh my. He loves the way it jiggles when he fucks you from behind, how soft and smooth it is when he grips it while you ride him.
C - Cum (Anything to do with cum)
You cannot tell me this man doesn't love cumming all over your back or ass. He's obsessed with the way it slides down the curve of your ass, coating his thighs in the substance. He adores how messy the whole process is, wanting to see you covered in just him, it could get him higher than any drug he's tried.
D - Dirty Secret ( Self-explanatory)
He just wants one night where he can do whatever he wants to your tits. Whether it be playing with your nipples, leaving hickeys on them, massaging them, or more importantly squishing them together and fucking them, his tip going between your plump lips every time he thrusts up into them.
E - Experience (How experienced are they?)
Did y'all see all the people that swarmed him once they knew who he was? Imagine what it was like outside the games. He is well-experienced when it comes to fucking someone, but not having an intimate moment with another person.
F - Favorite Position (What positions do they like the most?)
He loves any position that puts him in a position of control. He loves reverse cowgirl especially because it gives him full access to the sight of your ass. He's also a fan of doggy style, again due to the sight he gets of your ass but also because of how deep he can get in that position.
G - Goofy (How serious are they in the moment? Do they tease you?)
He is teasing the shit outta you I'm so sorry. I don't think he has the capability not to tease you. It just gets him so worked up seeing your eyes well up with tears at his comments, it just makes his cock throb.
H - Hair (What’s the hair situation down there)
I honestly cannot decide with him. For one he gives off the vibes that he's bald down there, finding the hair to be an annoyance. But also I don't think he'd care enough about it to shave it and just let it grow. For the sake of the argument, I'm just gonna say he shaves his shit bald.
I - intimacy (How romantic are they in the moment?)
I feel like there are some times when he can be very romantic if you need it. Usually, he's the type to go rough and fast. But occasionally he can be slow and sensual, giving you gentle kisses and touches, treating you as if you were the most delicate thing he's ever handled.
J - Jack Off (How often do they touch themselves?)
He jacks off very frequently, about every other day tbh. I don't think he'd do it to porn often, and if he did it would be to an actor who looks like you. But most of the time he does it to the memory of you, whether it be you grinding down on his face making those pretty noises he loves so much, or him fucking into you, your whines the only thing he can hear besides the slapping of your skin against his.
K - Kinks (What are their kinks?)
You cannot tell me this man isn't into Exhibitionism. He loves the idea of you guys almost getting caught in the middle of the act, he swears he feels himself get even harder at the sight of you trying to quiet yourself down in an attempt to not get caught. He's also into dacryphilia, seeing you cry from the overwhelming amount of pleasure he's causing you makes him cum right on the spot.
L - Location (Where do they prefer to have sex?)
He would be into anything public, bathroom stalls, fingering you under a table, having you bounce on his dick in a dark crowded club, he's into it all.
M - Motivation (What turns them on?)
Seeing you in any type of revealing clothing, especially skirts, immediately gets him hard. Seeing you in lingerie is by far the sexiest thing you could wear in front of him. He'd want you to keep it on as he bends you over, pulling the lingerie to the side and eating you out to his heart's content.
N - No (What are some things they’ll never do?)
He's not really into the whole submissive role, he always wants to be the one in charge, at least during any sexual interaction. He's also not into doing anything that can seriously harm you.
O - Oral (How do they feel about oral? Do they prefer giving or receiving?)
I don't think he has a preference between the two. He loves the sight of you on your knees, trying to fit his cock in your mouth, tears in the corner of your eyes due to the brutal pace he's set fucking your face. But he also adores the feeling of your thighs wrapped around his head, unintentionally pulling him closer to your cunt. The feeling of it pulsing around his tongue when he finally makes you cum, the little whines and moans you let out from the overstimulation.
P - Pace (How fast/slow are they?)
He's fast with his pace, he swears he can't help himself. The feeling of your tight walls wrapped around his cock, practically begging him to pound you into the mattress with all the force he can muster. It's your fault for feeling so damm good.
Q - Quickie (How do they feel about quickies?)
He loves them so much! He's usually busy writing his songs or in the studio recording, so quickies are always a yes for him.
R - Risk (How willing are they to experiment? Do they take any risks?)
He loves experimenting, but he's usually the one to initiate it due to his impulsive behavior. If it’s something you're not willing to try he'd absolutely respect that. But if you brought something up? Oh baby he's down to do whatever as long as it doesn't put either of you in danger. Wanna try out bondage? Go ahead and get comfortable because you'll be tied up for a while.
S - Stamina (How many rounds can they do? How long can they go for?)
When he's not high out of his mind, he doesn't go that many rounds usually 2 will be enough to get him tired. But when he's off some? Ooh boy you better prepare yourself. This man is a beast when he pops a pill, you'll be so exhausted by the time he's finished. Expect around 4-5 rounds with him before he's all out of energy.
T - Toys (Do they have any toys? Are they willing to use any?)
I don't think he has that many to be frank, at most he has a vibrator or two, maybe a cock ring if you wanna be bold. I think he's so cocky and confident about his skills that he finds them to be unnecessary. Sometimes if you're having trouble cumming he’ll take one out and use it on you, but it always gets out of hand due to the fact that he wants to see you squirt from the toy. “Cmon baby, I know you can do it. Don't you wanna make me happy? I know it'll feel so good for you so just relax and squirt all over this toy”
U - Unfair (Do they tease you? How unfair are they in the bedroom?)
I fear this man is the biggest teaser throughout the whole show. He'd find a way to tease you about anything and everything. In the bedroom you are not getting a MOMENT of peace. This man will edge you and overstimulate you all in the same night. He’ll find a way to tease you about the noises you make, saying “Aww baby, you're being so loud! Am I making you feel that good? Don't be shy, you can admit that I'm the best at making you cum.”
V - Volume (How loud are they?)
He's not too loud when it comes to his noises, just occasional growl and grunt. He's definitely into dirty talk though, a lot of it. You'll hear him say stuff like “That's my good bitch, taking my cock up her cunt like the good girl she is. Don't worry baby, I'm gonna make you feel so good you won't know what to do with yourself.”
W - Weird Fact (Self-explanatory)
He's always wanted someone to do a line of coke off his cock while he was hard.
X - X Ray (What’s it looking like in those pants.)
He's about 5’11, a little on the thinner side, but he's still toned. I think he's a lot girthier than he is long, so about 5.7 inches, but his girth makes up for it. His tip color is a deeper pink color, around #E0676B. He has a slight curve down, with a thick vein running down the left side of his shaft.
Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive? How often do they have sex?)
This man wants to do it with you every day. Not only is it the drugs that get him worked up, but just seeing you looking so damn sexy just being yourself, he could take you anytime anywhere, regardless of who's around.
Z - Zzz (How fast do they fall asleep after sex?)
I feel like he falls asleep very fast. After he's done making sure you're okay, he's slumped. He is not the type to wait for you to sleep first before he does.
(I've cooked with this one guys I cannot even lie. Thank you all sm for the recent support! I truly appreciate all the attention my work has gotten!)
Taglist:
@xera4170
#squid game#squid game smut#squid game 2#choi su bong#player 230#thanos#squid game fanfic#squid game fandom
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this is such a sweet quote and Lando's said exactly the same as well <3<3
but askfgsalfg why is this proving what I've kinda been suspecting and Zak doesn't rly fit in with landoscar and has largely not had as much to do w the driver partnership as he used to
we already knew from Andrea that Lando and Oscar do their own little separate debriefs and they were so excited about getting their own door separating them from everyone where it used to be in a shared hallway (including Zak)
but the golf, the dinners and the marketing stuff is all referring to Carlos' and Daniel's eras. Oscar couldn't even be bribed to play golf, is literally famous for not wanting to do marketing/contrived PR content and not being good at it, and the only "dinner" situation after Hungary was Lando and Oscar eating fast food with other drivers and then playing board games with Alex on the flight home ?? we also know that these debrief dinners don't happen otherwise bc Oscar usually goes home to sleep or out with Lily and Lando goes out being a very single guy or gaming w Max and BanKai etc. that post race debrief finishes and those two peace OUT. and tbh the amount that they've chosen to fly together to and from things now Oscar lives in Monaco, they've taken even more of that debriefing into their own hands!
like I just get the vibe that Zak doesn't rly have the boys club anymore and Andrea being Dad to his two kids is how things are rly being managed. even down to him sometimes wanting to be the bad guy that the two kids bond over hating sometimes even tho they love Dad really. that's just not a dynamic I see Zak fitting into. (and ngl probably some of the Daniel era in particular those tensions needed to be managed between him and Zak but aaaaaanyway)
I say this as someone who fully expects Lando and Oscar to have normal teammate fights at some point where there's the strong words to the media and angry radios etc etc - the fact that they decided so early on in their relationship to do a teammate version of 'private but not secret' couple thing of keeping fans and media out of their business, both good and bad, means they're absolutely discussing and strategizing about this (bc especially after alpinegate and taking Daniel's seat, it would've been very handy and easy for them to go a bromance angle!). which as a charlos veteran and also someone who knew the Max and Lando fight would blow over faster than anyone thought it would, I'm never going to be fazed by a fight between Lando and Oscar - but I'm also just not sold on it ever getting as out of control as so many people want/expect it to. and I feel that way partly at least bc I think there's been sort of a gen z gender neutralling happened to McLaren bc of this partnership (not as much of the usual of masculine/boys being boys energy*)
but also bc there's only one big personality/celebrity instead of two. off the track, Lando and Oscar perfectly compliment each other's personalities including how their friendship is a quiet thing rather than a big media-beloved bromance so they don't have the burden of managing fan expectations and reactions about it. you can kind of parallel it with the Lando and Max fight last season bc those two are genuinely involved in each other's lives as friends and spend the most time with each other than any other driver, including Lando being a regular fixture in Max's little family - but Max doesn't do PR at all so a lot of people still don't know how close they are. so the assumption was that their fight was this massive thing and the end of their relationship but a lot of us were like pfffff this'll blow over and Penelope's uncle will be back before she could even notice.
in the same way, Lando and Oscar doing all their bonding time out of the public eye and being the only two people who truly know how they feel about each other at any time means they are the only authority anyone should listen to! when they say 'fight over' they mean fight over! when they giggle and laugh waiting for a plane together after Monza or smile in relief at each other immediately after getting out of the cars in Hungary, then that's the truth! they're choosing not to let fans and the media in on this so that fans or the media can't feel they know better and contradict them!
and that's where I think Zak is more on the outside of things too. when even Andrea is like yea these boys are talking about things before speaking to their own teams then it feels like that's a real shift away from the explosive teammate dynamics everyone keeps referring to.
*which I'm not saying is inherently bad or toxic! esp since the dynamic of it with Lando and Carlos and Daniel was of scrungly little brother and adoring loud big brother <3
#inchidentallyanessay#rpf and silliness fully off for this one#also an explanation of why I'll never become one of these blogs who chooses one over the other#mostly bc all rich men and rich men in sports are pointless and not worth stanning literally ever#but also bc they just don't share a shred of similar dna to partnerships like prost senne or rosberg hamilton#like charles and carlos literally had warring families and garages at times and every time it all came good#landoscar is simply not that Continental or Emotional aslfgasljfgsajlf#for reference
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#okay i feel terrible because i ended up asking for my cleaning job tomorrow to reschedule to next week#i was just sort of getting some bad vibes i feel like#i like just yeah overall v nervous#and also feeling like it may be above what im able to do right now and they were really giving me much information#a part of me is like is this person trying to lure me into their house to kill me lol#anywah i asked if we could reschedule because i had something come come up for tomorrow#and im going to ask my therapist what to do#on monday!#but basically im just terrified at the fact that i cancelled so last minute because i feel like i cant do stuff like that#when starting a business#but anyway i feel such a sense of relief for cancelling and i also have accepted a different job for tomorrow#one that i feel a heck of a lot less scared about lol#idk the other person just seemed like they wanted to get me into their house??#idk how to explain it#is it horrible if they arent bad people for me to cancel like that??#like if im wrong in having a bad feeling#idk!!!!!
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I have a very. Specific thought about where Jacobi ends up post canon. I want him to like disappear for a month and then show back up out of nowhere and decide to couch surf at Minkowski’s place entirely uninvited.
#Iii need to get to the time to kill era of my relisten.#I know she killed his best friend I know there’s no way he’s over that. I think that contributes to the vibe.#I just. I feel like they have something there. Some sort of dynamic. Good or bad.#Forcing himself into her life bc he wants to make her miserable probably but also because maybe she’s all the memory he’s got left.#Sorry for hitting characters with my semi random close friendship (?) beam it will keep happening.#Renee Minkowski#Daniel Jacobi#wolf 359#yelling. screaming even. :0]
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The nature of time is that (culturally) Christian Euro/Anglo colonial consumers (hereafter white ‘people’) fetishize the idea of being ‘close to nature’ or ‘primitive’ or ‘savage’ and latch on to the idea that there are groups of people in the world who are somehow bestial or who have some kind of special powers from holding animist beliefs/beliefs that acknowledge the body as opposed to the Christian belief that the body is a kind of useless appendage to a person. We see this across decades from the 19thC to today in the racist fetishization of indigenous people across the globe, particularly residents of the Americas, Australasia, and southern/eastern Africa.
White consumers use a warped conception of other cultures to live out the fantasies that the Christian soul/body stuff engenders. You keep getting told that your emotions and physical sensations are the devil’s work? You want to get in touch with those physical sensations, but you don’t want it to interfere with your worldview? Simply project them on to a convenient group of people with slightly different conventions from you. Imagine how cool it would be to be 100% physical sensation (especially those pesky violent and/or sexual urges) and no mental burden, then unleash that in a way that causes millions of deaths worldwide via the dehumanization of entire nations of people just trying to live their lives. White consumers love a Proud Warrior Race Guy.
Flash forward to the 2010s, it’s generally considered impolite to spread the same propaganda that justified the genocide and dispossession of many different groups of people. However white culture hasn’t changed that much and normal human activities still need to be explained away to maintain the veneer of white intellectualism that has been used to justify white violence for years and years. You can’t just stomp around and clap your hands and dance badly, you’ve got to project it somewhere else.
But wait! There’s a community of people considered ‘tribal’ and ‘savage’, considered violent and bestial, who were never colonized! It’s…the Norse. Fetishizing early medieval North Sea raiders can’t be cultural appropriation, see, they’re white! It’s not offensive to replace an entire culture with white (male) ideas of what’s cool if that culture is totally unassociated with colonizer stereotypes and is in fact a culture of colonizers!
And that’s my theory on why there are so many Norse-inspired folk bands/video games/tv shows/memes/literally anything in the 2010s. VSaga not counted because that manga has been running since 2003 and is actually well-researched and comes out of a culture with a similar but distinct tradition of racism. The Euro storytelling tendencies of needing some kind of violent avatar have taken on ye anciente Norseman now that people care a little bit about the gallons of blood used to sketch other ethnic stereotypes. Done and dusted. Except the other side is that the fetishization of early medieval Norse culture is literally just white supremacist 101 and a lot of artists don’t step around that nearly as carefully as they should
#it’s the old saw about rammstein being constantly talked up by American nazis because they can’t speak German and having to write a song#called ‘links 2 3 4’. asscreed/the northman/vikings tv/wardruna/god of war/whatever are fairly harmless cosplay activities#but taken together it’s like. where is the line between condescending cosplay fetishization (not great but whatever) and the sort of#idealization/valorization/historical erasure that plays into white supremacist rhetoric#after all—look at where we get a lot of pop culture viking imagery from: it’s Wagner#kelsey rambles#this is a long bad post about me having Spotify as blocked on my work computer and playing some faun and then letting the radio take away#praying and wikipedia-ing that it doesn’t take me to some dogshit nazi band along the way#which YouTube recs have done repeatedly. it’s a fucking cesspool out there in the metal/neofolk world#I also keep thinking back to Faun (neofolk forerunner) saying explicitly that they use central/south asian melodies and tonalities#the whole medieval folk aesthetic thing is a cobbled-together vibe that was created by 19thC romantics and 20thC fantasy writers#i just feel like there should be more of an…acknowledgement of artifice to ward off the nazis#I like neofolk music. I love vinland saga. I enjoy mountain scenery and stories of sea raiders.#would love to be able to enjoy it without looking over my shoulder all the time
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part of the problem is that a lot of hugo's politics are really well thought out & considered & good but then some of them are like. entirely vibes-based to the point of feeling muddled & inconsistent & even straight up Bad sometimes. which is annoying
#sometimes it's like he's just saying things. chewing it over in real time but not getting anywhere really. which is frustrating when you've#just been immersed in a really deep & serious point he's carefully made & laid out just before#<- e.g. this section of revolt vs insurrection has some good points ig & could be interesting if it was actually grounded in some sort#of idk. political theory or something. but instead he spends a lot of it just falling back on ~vibes which sucks Especially bc#sometimes that 'sense' misleads him i think! and he ends up wandering closer to certain reactionary ideas than he intends#like he starts w this really banger bit basically making fun of the bourgeoisie opinion on violent uprising but then?? kind of ends up#doing that a bit himself by the end? not to mention that tbh i think the whole distinction he's trying to make here is kind of bogus anyway#it really feels he's trying to soothe his like lingering bits of conservative discomfort around this sort of armed uprising#by sorting it into a 'good' 'type' while maintaining a 'bad' 'type' for anything he's still not comfortable with#<- i wouldn't phrase that quite so harshly except i still think his bit on 1848 is annoying & this sort of goes hand in hand w that towards#like. actually actively working against the values he's trying to strive towards. y'know.#it's like you can see genuinely him intellectually trying to come round but he has still not let go of these#sort of like. instinctive conservative bourgeois discomforts in his subconscious. if that makes sense#thoughts#<- also the take on caesar & alexander & columbus etc. 😑🚬 i'm tired#kind of funny though bc sometimes his characters (i.e. like the amis) come across as having more clear grounded discussed well#thought through political opinions than he does. lol. it's like he saw the vision but was struggling with it personally at times#les mis
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Me: oh i suddenly have a lot of free time, i can be productive & get silly
also me: vaguely stares into space not doing much of anything besides think about the terror bc it's been one of those weeks (months)
#does one not bring habits#i am gonna work on my fic rn i think ive spaced out enough#i feel its important to give myself some space tho like i literally made it through working#holiday retail without becoming a non person like im not even sure if i explained to my therapist#right by what i mean by that but im just so relieved it didn't happen again#NOT to say i was like in a super super bad spot last year either tho bc i wasn't feeling like erm#going back to high school me sort of mentality woof#anyways i think when i get so burnt out i go into legit super survival mode where i become a non person#and this is what i was struggling with in high school so much and also i have#a theory about something else but i dont need to legit air out my mental health shit in the tags on tumblr#just saying i think its so slay i was able to actually experience new years and jsut be silly#and also not being some weird non thing#anyways slay babe slay we sill hopefully stay wining in 2025#its snowing here and im excited for the vibes#the ambience
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“You look like shit, man.”
HURT / COMFORT : STARTERS / accepting.
“ that’s bold coming from you. ” might be bold, but it’s not entirely untrue. there are certainly days when ren isn’t at his best - days like this, when everything he’s been avoiding finally catches up to drag him down. the weight on his shoulders is heavy: the persistent lack of sleep, the looming threat of an inevitable headache, the ever-present shadow of the mara festering within him. though he’s been doing better recently, or so he likes to believe, there are still challenges to this slower, unfamiliar rhythm that he continues to wrestle with even now.
irony clings to him every time he’s near the archivist, carving that filthy hollow within him even deeper, a grave he’s unwittingly shaped over the countless years spent in pursuit. the hunter locks eyes with his prey, fleetingly wonders what flesh might taste like between wolfish canines, then shakes the thought loose as if banishing an unwelcome whisper, continuing as though nothing ever happened. over & over again, ren adjusts to this cursed truce he has sworn to uphold. if there is one unyielding truth about him, it is this: ren will honor his word, no matter the recipient or the reason, unflinching even when the stakes run impossibly high. dan heng is safe. not out of affection, but sheer obligation.
predator lies quiet, restrained in the aftermath of past conflicts, sparing its prey. for now.
any other man might wrestle with regret or lingering thoughts about his past choices, especially when faced with someone tied to a shared history as bitter and fractured as theirs. but not ren. the memories that surface are not a wistful montage of lost camaraderie or futile attempts to mend what was broken. instead, they are a relentless bloodbath, a carnage where every body is his own and every spear piercing him is one of his own making - wielded by the reincarnation of the very man to whom it was once dedicated. a grotesque, abhorrent cycle of disgrace and ruin.
ren harbors no grand delusions about his own standing. this isn't about knocking him down a peg, the hunter does not sit atop some imagined throne of superiority, though it might occasionally seem that way. when the mara takes hold, and it strikes hardest when dan heng is the spark, the dynamic shifts. a flicker of irritation crosses his crimson eyes as ren exhales slowly, the weight of the moment palpable. the scales have tipped dramatically since that fateful day, since his relentless pursuit ground to a halt, since dan heng seized the upper hand in every conceivable way. ren is a cursed man, perpetually adding to his own affliction.
“ what do you want ? you come to bother me as if it is a new hobby of yours. unbelievable. surely you are more creative than that. ”
#etherealguard#mailbox.#hellooo thank you for this ask#i wanted to hit you up before i wrote it but then i was like no let me just write it so you can get a proper feel of what i envision#cause i'm terribly bad at explaining it and better at showing it in writing#but yes. some sort of antag or pred/prey dynamic is the vibe#though because of my own interpretation and the whole canon thing of ren not chasing him anymore i didnt turn this into a fight scene#but i want you to know we can always do throwback threads to those encounters if you wish#with time (a lot of it) i think they have the possibility of landing in mutual understanding#even if they will never be friends? and of course depending on what canon decides to do with them#by mutual understanding i mean more like a proper truce and when i say with time i really do mean it won't be like flipping a switch#slow burn enemies to coexisting sillies if you will#sorry for all the tag yapping feel free to IM me if you have any questions or input or if you want me to change anything!
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Maaaaaaaaaaaan, come on.
(the post has ended up in the tags btw. I am not changing this and I need you to understand that it is just me talking to myself semi-publicly)
#Nevi Writes#things said by a guy writing a thing he doesn't even intend to be writing and it's like 10k of words now. >:[#while that's true I do want to emphasize that nobody should get excited about it right now tho okay#because like it's just. idk. I feel very much like it could end up not worth pursuing anyway. it's just a little baby wip.#(when the fuck did my little baby wips get to be 1/4-1/2 the length of my previous 'finished' stories!! what the hell)#it just feels nice to make words tho. and it does have that kind of 'ah good to catch up with these guys again' vibe which is nice.#even if the break has once again been like. on the order of days to a week maybe. I'm so bad at this taking a break business suddenly. lel.#but I don't have anything much to say about it at this point#other than I'm debating inventing a reason that presidential elections would have been moved by a couple of years between now and 2212#what is it with me and having to be so damn precise with dates in this whole narrative. am I just mad that Capcom never tries?#(yes) (so mad)#(and 2212 would actually be an election year is the problem. I want time to have passed but I also want there to be a pres. election.)#(it's fine don't worry about it)#(this is how I decided that Blucifer got bload up and then replaced also. weird reliance on mashing up IRL things and fictional explosions)#(but it's fun isn't it? got that veneer of verisimilitude. I'm good at long words)#idk this is inevitable isn't it. but I'm going to keep playing like it's not. I think I need a little more space for this one mentally.#the first one just sort of fell out of my head fully assembled and the second one did that also but with different vibes#though it did actually take some cutting things and adjusting things to make it work which Failure to Compile did not#Failure to Compile was bizarrely effortless until the mad editing dash. Outcome Unpredictable was WORK#fun work at least! but in hindsight it was definitely more work to make it flow properly.#the real job for the 3th if it happens is gonna be wrapping up threads without dropping new ones in bc that's such a habit of mine now
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Once again missing a brainstorm buddy on my same wavelength, because bouncing ideas at the wall like I'm playing squash doesn't really work with the idea I had yesterday. It gives me way too much freedom for my own good, so much that there are just at least 2-3 cool options for each decision I could take, but I gotta pick only one each and there's no clear winner T_T Oh the curse of having too many good ideas :')
#Skye says stuff#like I got the general vibe down but I'm VERY torn on so many things it's not even funny#gnawing at this whole thing like a hyena gnaws at a bone to get to the juicy bits#also we desperately need some more asura faces and fem hairstyles that are short/scruffy. I can't even make that comm in-game smh#btw sorry for complaining about this a lot lately. y'all being nice in general is more than I could ever ask for after that bs#it's just a rollercoaster sometimes cuz I'm doing fine on my own but then I get complex feelings about bad experiences and ex-buddies#my brain just doesn't expect to find THAT sort of “in each other's mind” connection again. that's okay. just annoying when needed y'know?
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was going through my blog trying to track down an old post i made talking abt my feelings on jolene and it was. much longer than i remembered it being. and haha yeah i still agree with it. i need to fucking. sort out my feelings on that character and that subplot
#like. its just been A Thing where once i thought abt it too hard it was just Wow i hate this actually#its not entirely like a visceral discomfort but its a sort of like. its unpleasant to think abt this for too long#like??? the easiest way for me to explain it is that normally its fine like ok a pursuer antagonist character to add lil backstory#but the moment you toss in the implication that she still has romantic feelings for him it jumps up to WOW THIS IS UNCOMFORTABLE#for me. for me. like just all of it? and some fan stuff that influenced it like. bad jokes and uncomfy phrasing that leans to linebeck bein#like an unwilling participant or ‘giving in’ like fan stuff also REALLY hasnt helped so i just. yknow avoid it#salty talks#might delete later but i didnt delete the og so whatever#like she is absolutely just. badly written. shes a joke and poorly written and its just. there and there are implications#it does just come down to. shes badly written and the way linebeck reacts to all of it doesnt help#like when i worry abt like. coming off as sexist. its like nah shes just fucking badly written#casca is a similar kind of character as someone aggressive to her love interest and lashing out at him despite having feelings#but shes like. well written. and guts reciprocates. and you like. see them communicate and grow closer#here youre just given a disastrous fucking aftermath where communication is completely broken down#and while the aggressive party still has feelings the other party actively wants to just not engage with it and actively doesnt care#cuz like. he literally does not bring her up or allude to her outside of her being immediately relevant i cannt see him being interested#GOD. i just need to write all this out i keep justifying myself with it i need to. get it out#im narrowing down. something. for how i think their backstory together goes with it being a lot of miscommunication and it just being like#a bad situation anyways with their last actual encounter being a violent one and its like yeah no that was a trainwreck#i know its a fucking like. comedic(????) subplot in a lighthearted childrens game#but it has Vibes to me and that game does have some darker vibes to it we all know that#and it just. i dont like her. i dont. i remember i used to be like. alright with her. and then i thought on it too much#casca addendum ig. shes objectively not like. well well written. but all things considered. shes pretty good#like im p sure she was made to suffer to make guts feel bad but. she does happen to be a kickass character in the midst of that
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yknow what bugs me is when ppls criticism of YA media boils down to them just not knowing how teenage crushes work
#'bella being depressed because edward wasnt at school is unhealthy obsession' no that's called having a crush#'him asking her out by them hearing a rumor saying theyre dating and bella going 'what should i say' +him responding 'well i guess you could#tell them yes. yknow just because its easier' is lame and boring' are you kidding me i ate that shit up at that age#when two shy awkward people flirt thats how you end up in a relationship is you both kind of just sidle your way up to it#and i dont even feel like that one contributes to like 'things abt him that arent necessarily red flags on their own but as a whole point to#bad things' like. from what i gathered feom the movie bella did not seem like the type to like some big first move#like. shes an emo bruh girl. if it wasnt some sort of edgy teenage heartthrob performance then shed just brush him off like#every other Conventionally Attractive Dude™ falling all over her#ppl keep acting like her not going for every other dude who wants her is a character flaw or bad writing but. like#literally just have you ever met a depressed teenage girl.#shes Not Like Other Girls™ and finds regular guys who express emotions in regular ways boring#her wanting him over every other bland boring safe guy she could have in an instant isnt a plot hole‚ its characterization#also i disagree with the vibe that she's just a blank slate like. as someone who was a depressed teenage girl#she didn't come across as blank to me#she came across as. depressed and emo and trying so very hard to look cool and mysterious at all times and had#spent her life up to that point praying to find out magic was real and could whisk her away into a life of adventure and romance and drama#you look me in the eyes and tell me that girl didn't spend middle school chewing through every book she could get her hands on#as fast as possible.#idk#origibberish
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#here's some of the classics on that list i have beef with btw:#i have tried to read A Confederacy of Dunces several times and it's funny but it's also so cringe and Ignatius is so obnoxious#that i find it too difficult to finish like i just feel depressed and bad for everybody around him too much#i tried reading Infinite Jest like a decade ago and i got like 200 pages in and i remember thinking it felt like#such a slog the entire time because he's just so gd wordy and also i stopped liking DFW after i heard the abuse allegations against him#frankenstein i didnt read that long ago but i just remember finding it so boring for some reason?? i feel i might need to read it again#dracula ngl i feel like im cheating a bit saying ive completely read it because i loved the beginning and then HATED so much of the rest#the characters were just so boring and melodramatic hahaha i just liked the part where jonathan was doing a travel diary#and trapped in the castle tbh and after that i skimmed quite a bit#i almost flipped my shit when i saw ender's game on there because I ALWAYS mix it up with ready player one by ernest cline#which i bought the audiobook of a while back and hated every minute of it i dont think its good at all#but it wasnt that so phew my faith in this list is somewhat restored#i read most of the first game of thrones book and was disappointed tbh maybe because id seen the show already#so i was like 'this feels almost exactly the same except worse?' because i'd been expecting it to give me more depth and insight#into the characters but instead it felt exactly the same and i still didnt love any of the characters enough to feel attached to them#also i am fully aware me not personally liking or vibing with a book doesnt mean it doesnt deserve to be considered great btw#but i think if youre gonna be like me and force yourself to go through a bunch of lists like this very seriously then you also need to just#let yourself be like 'yeah not for me' without feeling too bad about it sometimes too#often times i dont particularly love the classics or 'important books' but at the same time#i still feel like im getting more out of reading them than just grabbing the newest hyped up books that also dont do anything for me#maybe not in a 'wow i loved reading this' way but in like a#'i now have first-hand knowledge of this thing that is so influential / so frequently referenced'#or 'this challenged me and i feel like i did a mental/emotional workout or gave me some new food for thought'#or 'made me more aware of what gaps in my knowledge and reading skills and what my tastes are too'#sort of way...#it really just depends on what you're reading for and why and what you're hoping to get out of it a lot of the time maybe#it's like the homework i give myself to go through these lists that i also intersperse with the stuff i read more just for fun#p
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So. Sit with me everyone. We agree that we need to stop worshipping a person or media on the sole grounds of being gay right. Can we finally agree that it's not homophobic to criticize gay ppl with large platforms. Can we finally actually learn to think critically abt how these ppl talk abt ppl outside of their immediate identities and to recognize that just because they say they aren't bigoted doesn't mean they aren't. Please.
#rat rambles#like seeing ppl dunk on james is vibdicating and all but also. yall do realize that even without the plagerism hed still be a piece of shit#and that another white man shouldnt have to spell out to you what misogyny is#<- directed at ppl who watched mr misogyny before hand#Im not saying anyone is a bad person for not realizing. Im just saying to be more careful and attentive in the future#dont be scared to criticize the ppl you watch even if you dont think theyre a bad person#hell Ive been watching hbomberguy for years and he is certainly not perfect#like in a lot of his old videos you can rly see some unconcious ableism#and I could go on and on with nitpicks and gripes Ive had with him over the past several years but thats not the point of this post#the point is that you need to get yourself comfortable with digging deeper into the things you consume#a lot of ppl will say things like 'oh this person gave me a bad vibe but I didnt think it was this bad'#and I want to just say if you get that sort of bad vibe then fucking dig deeper!! interrogate that feeling and where its coming from!#this also applies to situations where you might dislike someone for bigoted reasons of your own#I think ppl try way too hard to train themselves to not interrogate their discomfort and it's so not good for your critical thinking skills#and in fact interrogate your comforts too#just in general thinking abt why certain things make you feel certain ways is good practice and will help you see red flags sooner#is this gay guy focusing more on gay men than gay women? why might this be? is it really the topic like he says it is?#if you think well Im also more interested in gay men that gay women in history so hes not doing anything bad#then question why you think that. idc how uncomfortable it makes you to question your views on minorities fucking do it#cause imagining you arent misogynist or racist or whatever the fuck doesnt make you less bigoted#if you want to be the ally you think you are you need to suck it up theres not rly a kinder way I can manage to put it
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not rental car murderboarding making me logically consider the possibility of Æthelthryth's reddit account
#i was thinkin of the guy nat bugs about his car#i was thinkin about the sorts of subreddits he would post in about the absolute batshit freaky things he's witnessing#i feel like he'd be a glitch in the matrix type guy#the car is there but the car is not there??? what gives???#whether or not it's ~reddit~ or some other fictional site. either way. it would be.... Something. if#etheldreda somehow trying to get information out of him fjdjdjsk#i doubt the ethels would be able to track down such a specific post though#but its still funny#/ unsettling.#i think nat finds the post though and the guy is like#UPDATE SOME WEIRD GUY CAME AND TOLD ME IT WAS HIS CAR#I MEAN LIKE REALLY WEIRD LIKE SUPER DISHEVELLED AND AWKWARD#JUST BAD VIBES#and nat is just like#????? :(
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