#i was incapable of thinking of anything else | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fancyfeathers · 8 hours ago

Text

Always Prey But Never A Bird

Based on the Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling series

Previous Chapter <- Chapter Seven -> Next Chapter

Taglist: @jsprien213 @toast-on-dandelioms @plsfckmedxddy @lilyalone @sydneyyyya @yandere-wishes @cxcilla @nemesis-writer

You are riding your bike just across the bridge, pulling into a small and long abandoned dock which was rendered unusable due to an Arkham Asylum breakout incident two months ago. You dismounted your bike, leaving it relating against a busted up fire hydrant, the motorcycle most likely enduring a scrape on the metal. You tugged at your hair, a sharp in take of the cold air of Gotham which made a noise which was reminiscent of a hiss. You felt like you were about to cry but instead you screamed, it was guttural and painful, like you had been stabbed in the gut or like when you fell of that bridge a few weeks prior to only be saved by Dick Grayson, you wanted to actually kill yourself in this moment or at least hit something.

As it could not get any worse you could hear the roar of an engine as it slowed down in the vehicle’s approach to you.

Your father.

“What the hell were you thinking?!” You heard his voice boom from behind you following the noise of the door of the Batmobile opening, his footsteps stomping towards you. He never got this level of anger at you as a child, even when you did start dating your now fiancé without his permission or when you punched a boy in your class in the face, well punch is a light word, you beat him bloody as a ten year old. “You cannot make a scene like that, you are going to put yourself in danger!”

“Wake up, I am in this world now, are you not in danger every night? What about Dick, Tim, Cassandra, what about them?” You snapped back at him, turning around at him, looking at him with that intense pain and anger that burned within them. “You all consider them your own, hell Damian is your biological child just like me and yet you treat me as if I am an incapable, helpless, broken child, a little girl who cannot do anything without her father breathing down her neck.”

“They are trained and have been doing this for a number of years-“

“So have I! I have taught myself everything over the last four years and yet you still see me as a child even now, I have done everything they have and yet you act as if I will break my leg if I even so much as trip when walking.” You scoffed, throwing your arms up in the air, you were exasperated at this point. “I am tired of being treated like a little girl, by all of you! I am exhausted trying to prove myself to you, so much so that I have only now decided to pursue my own happiness, the engagement was not to spite you or anyone else, it was for me and my own happiness for the rest of my life and unlike you I will actually be able to put the mask when the person who loves me asks me to, I won’t have them leave me when they are pregnant because they are terrified of what life their daughter will have with her father being who he is.”

“You let your emotions get the best of you, you put a target on your back because of your behavior back there.” He scolded you, his eyes narrowing at you from beneath the cowl. “You will get yourself killed by running around like this, your brothers and sisters are able to work with their heads clear but it’s clear that you let your anger control you-“

“Is that what you said when Jason came back as Red Hood, wanting to kill the Joker? Or when Dick left the manor and stopped being Robin because he couldn’t stand being in your shadow?” You rolled your eyes, walking back to your motorcycle, swinging your leg over the motorcycle, the engine purring beneath you. “Don’t try to drag me back, I don’t need your protection and I’m not yours anymore. Try anything and you’ll never see me again, trust me a lifetime is much longer than four years.”

______________________

You say on the ledge of a building, not quite willing to go back to the penthouse where Gabriel and his parents awaited for you to return but you were not ready to patrol around the city and potentially encounter your family, not a doubt in your mind that they were out and about with the party over. You sighed, resting your head on your hands and looking out over the city as you sat on top of an apartment building downtown, you would need to get back on a daytime sleep schedule again if you wanted to move on past your vigilantism, to be able to put up your mask for good.

“I thought I told you to return to your home.” You jumped up when you heard a familiar voice speak from behind you. You turned your head around to see a figure under the dim light of Gotham streetlights, Talia Al Ghul. “And yet here you are, disobeying your father at every turn.”

“He may be my biological father, but I will not treat him as such because that is not what he deserves, and I’m not going to back down from a fight just because you asked me to.” You snapped at her, standing up from the ledge, your body tensing as your hand came to rest on your belt, more specifically on an emergency signal that would alert your team if anything remotely went south or maybe even your family depending on if Barbara got into the security system again. “What do you want? I don’t really want to see you right now.”

“It is not me who wants to speak to you this time I am afraid.” She replied, a smile playing on the corner of her lips as she takes out a piece of fabric, a scarf, a very beautiful and most likely a priceless piece, and you certainly knew fabrics and fashions, your mother had a passion for them when you were growing up with just her and she took you traveling the world, your childhood home before you two returned to Gotham was in Singapore, your mother never wanted to come back to Gotham, but that was a story for another day. Talia handed you the scarf and then guided your hand underneath the jacket you wore over your suit. “When you are willing, wear this and someone will retrieve you, do not worry you will not be harmed and you will be returned right where you were taken.”

“I don’t think I understand-“

“My own father would like to see you, nothing more than pleasant conversation, maybe a bit of tea?” Her hand trailed up your cheek, stroking it affectionately as if nothing was wrong at all. “But I would not wait forever, patience is a virtue that does not last forever, my dear.”

“Don’t call me that, and I’m not particularly fond of the idea of meeting your father, especially the idea of being kidnapped to do so.” You sighed, slipping out your hand and glancing at the scarf she gave you. “But it’s a shame really since this is a really beautiful scarf, it reminds me of the sort of thing my mother would wear back when we lived in… never mind that was a long time ago.”

“Well you can keep it, it is a gift after all. You did remind me that I should pay your mother a visit, I have a few gifts for her, such a sweet thing.”

“You know she can’t stand you, right? My father also hates the idea of you being near her especially after how you conceived Damian, I-“ You were about to finish your sentence which was already earning a scowl from her but your phone rang, tucked inside your utility belt pocket. You sighed, keeping your eyes locked on Talia as you dug out your phone from your pocket, taking a look down at the caller ID, your now fiancé. “I… I have to take this, it’s… it’s my fiancé.”

“Go ahead, I will see you soon anyway, my dearest girl.” You blinked and in a moment she was gone, disappeared out of nowhere. You only glanced around for a moment before sighing and answering the phone.

“Hey dove, are you alright? Your father ran off pretty quickly after you left, your siblings and Miss Gordon too, I think they’re worried about you… do they know you’re…”

“Yes, they do know I’m Songbird, even if I wish they didn’t.” You replied to Gabriel, assuming what he was going to ask over the phone and of course you were right. “Look I’ll be back soon, really it was just a camera malfunction in the Joker’s cell-“

“The Joker?! You were… I… this is exactly why I want you to quit, I just don’t want you hurt by crazies like him.” You heard his voice sigh from the other end of the line. “Look, just come back in one piece.”

“Don’t worry about me too much, the Batman tailed me in there and made me sit on the side lines, the man is the most paranoid person I have ever met.” You rolled your eyes at the memory of your father back there and the unsettling comments of the Joker. “Look I’ll be back before morning, don’t wait for me… I need to meet up with some people.”

“Who may that be?”

“…for lack of a better term, my aunt.”

“You have an aunt?”

“Kind of… sort of?”

______________________

You parked your bike outback, behind a high end apartment building that was your destination. You took off your suit, leaving you in your evening gown and you tucked the pin into your small handbag, alongside your lipgloss and phone. You walked up the backstairs, avoiding the lobby and the doorman and so no one would take photos of you and the gossip headline would not be about the youngest Wayne child running about the city after you disappeared for four years, which was scandal enough.

The apartment hallway was cold, the air conditioning blasting as your heels clicked against the tile. Then eventually you reached a door at the end of the hallway and it took you a moment but you eventually mustered up the courage to knock. You could hear the sound of footsteps from behind the door and the sound of the lock and the door knob turning…

“Selina… hi…” The woman before you did not look shocked at the sight of you like you expected, instead she just smiled at you. “I’d like to talk… if you have the time-“

“I’ll get some wine.” She opened the door wide for you, allowing you to step into her apartment which was far warmer than the hallway. “Make yourself at home, Kitten.”

“Thank you, Selina.” You replied to her, walking straight into her living room and sitting down on the couch and as she walked off to the kitchen to grab two wine glasses and a bottle of chardonnay. “I… I got engaged.”

“Oh I know.” You glanced back at her in the kitchen as she poured the wine into each glass and with her free hand she held something up, your engagement ring. “Snagged your ring.”

“Selina!”

“Sorry, sorry, Kitten.” She laughed, taking both wine glasses back out to her living room where you sat. “Besides Dick came by whining about it after that party at that museum, he was practically sobbing, but so have been telling them all since you left that you have moved on with your life a long time ago, probably off traveling the world, but you stayed in Gotham of all places, after all this time.”

“Ya… I guess I just wanted to prove a point to my old man, Dick, Jason, Tim- all of them really, that I can do anything they can.” You held your hand out as Selina set the glasses of wine on the coffee table and she took your hand in hers as she sat down next to you and she slipped the ring back on your finger. “Dick didn’t tell you anything about who I am engaged to, did he?”

“Only that he hated everything about that and felt as if you were dying right before his eyes.” She grabbed the glass of wine that was hers and she took a sip before looking down at your hand and engagement ring again. “But I have to say that is one hell of a stone, how much?”

“It’s an heirloom, it was his great grandmother’s ring… or was it his great great grandmother’s ring? I wish I could remember.” You looked down at the ring and smiled wide, leaning your head back on the couch. “Two million to answer your question and his name is Gabriel Christel.”

“Two million?! Kitten, you have him wrapped around your finger and lapping at every word you say.” She giggled like a little girl, before standing up from the couch and walking back to the kitchen and grabbing her laptop from the counter while one of her many cats that she took in as strays jumped up onto your lap and curled up against you. She sat down right next to you, opening her laptop. “What are you thinking about with the wedding? Colors? Flowers? Guest list?”

“I don’t know any of that yet I’m afraid… but Selina, I need to ask you a favor.” You reached over and closed her laptop, not wanting to talk about any wedding planning at the moment. “This is Songbird business and right now Songbird needs Catwoman.”

“Of course, Kitten.” She set her laptop aside and pushed it onto the coffee table next to hers and your wine glasses. “What is it? And I promise, whatever you ask, whatever you say will never reach the ears of your father.”

“Well, it will eventually….” You sighed, squeezing your brow between your thumb and forefinger. “There are many people of different organizations who may be after me, but if something happens to me, please look after my friends, they would not be able to survive in Gotham without me and I doubt my family would be keen on lending a helping hand since they helped hide me for four years.”

“You really didn’t have to ask me that, lovely.” She smiled at you, taking your hands in her own, giving them a soft squeeze as her sharpened nails ever so slightly pressed against the skin of your knuckles, not hard enough to break skin at all, no she was always gentle with you. “I will always look after you, and that includes your friends too.”

“Thank you, Selina.”

“Now, that aside, I do want to talk about wedding dresses with you.” She reached out and grabbed her computer, quickly dropping the topic as quickly as you brought it up. She opened her computer, turning it on and her sharp nails tapped against the keyboard as she typed in her password. “What is your budget?”

“…there is none.”

“Now you’re talking my kind of language, Kitten.”

______________________

Selina leaned back on her couch, your head resting on her lap, you were long fast asleep. Selina had gotten a makeup wipe and she took off your makeup along with practically doing a whole skincare routine on you, after all she cannot have the future bride to be breaking out. She slipped off your heels and set them next to your handbag on the coffee table, besides designer brands like that hardly get worn anyway.

“I knew you were going to show up, Brucie.” Selina commented, glancing over her shoulder at the figure that lingered in the shadows of her apartment, near her window that she accidentally left open to air out the food she accidentally burned not too long before you came. She held her finger up to her lips in a shushing motion as he stepped closer, just close enough to love over the couch and see you sleeping on her lap. “She practically passed out about an hour ago, the poor kitten is just so tired, probably all the family stress you put her through.”

“Hmm… she put herself in danger today.” Your father spoke, walking around the couch so Selina would not have to roll her neck about just to see him, his footsteps as quiet as a mouse as to not wake you, but then his eyes fell upon the empty glasses of wine. He picked up one of the glasses, your empty glass, he ran his finger along the rim, collecting the liquid that was left behind before shooting a glare at Selina. “You drugged her.”

“She was exhausted, I could hear how tired she sounded, again probably from the stress.” Selina sighed, scratching at your scalp, messaging your head as she ran her fingers and nails through your hair. “If you’ve come to take her back to the manor I won’t allow you to.”

“Not… not yet.” Selina watched as the Batman kneeled down on the ground next to you, brushing the hair out of your face. He looked down at your hand and the engagement ring upon your finger, he sighed and slid it off, but of course he had to return it under Selina’s watchful eye. He sighed and pried one of the smaller diamonds off of the ring with a batarang and before Selina could raise an objection he took something out of a small pouch on his utility belt, a fake diamond. “It’s a tracker, just to make sure she is okay.”

“And so you can spy on her at any hour of the day.” Selina snapped back at Bruce, a smirk tugging at the corners of her lips. “You really are the most paranoid person I have ever met.”

“I am keeping my daughter safe.” She watched as Bruce slipped the engagement ring back onto your finger. “She is young and reckless.”

“Hm… well, may I have that loose diamond, that alone is worth a small fortune.”

“Selina.”

“Fine.”

22 notes · View notes

gauntletqueen · 3 days ago

Text

I'm known to be honest. To a fault, some would say, but only logically, not emotionally. Without even realising it, I usually put up a front of sorts, appearing perfectly happy and content. It's not so much that I lie about how I feel, it's moreso that I can't get myself to talk about my emotions in the first place. It makes me feel really awful. I'm taking this time to be truly honest about how I feel and who I am.

I'm afraid of a lot of things. That most of my friends secretly don't care about me and only humor me because the alternative is too much of a hassle. That I'll never actually be happy with who I am, no matter how many positive changes I make to myself. That people will realise I'm not anything special, that so many people in my spheres are a better alternative to me, that what little I've managed to accomplish in my continuous car crash of a life amounts to nothing. That my years of professional education, self-taught skills and dreams of becoming an artist really have been wasted. That I'm undeserving and even incapable of real romantic love. That, by being honest about all this, I'll drive people away.

Most of all I'm afraid of the relentless march of time. That all of my bad choices, failures, wasted opportunities, fears and losses are constantly compounding. The terrifying prospect of living in a world that keeps getting worse, that as time goes by, the people in whom I find the most comfort will be taken from me. That my chances to live my life in a way I can be happy with are slipping away.

And I feel ungrateful. I'm told I'm loved, that I matter and that I do have a positive impact on the lives of others. People tell me they love what I do, that they look up to me, feel inspired. They put me on a pedestal, think me unapproachable. It makes me angry how wrong that feels. My self esteem is so bad I can't imagine a world in which these people aren't wrong for this. I know their feelings are valid, I know I should just be happy with their compliments, but it's like I'm an outsider in my own mind, desperately clawing at the windows and screaming to stop being so stubborn, so sad, so self-destructive.

I've often talked about wanting, needing to be a robot. For gender euphoria, of course, and to be rid of the need to eat and sleep, and chronic illness. But it goes deeper. I want to be something other entirely, somewhere else entirely. Something disconnected from this hellish existence where I'm constantly fighting myself in every way. Something not bound by the ticking clock of a biological life, or the crushing fear of a monotonous, unfulfilled everyday existence. Free to just be, without a lifetime of dreams and worries, stretching both back and forward in time. Maybe I want to be nothing at all.

I don't know if this makes sense. I just wrote it down. I'm sorry. Thank you for reading.

#this is a big vent post. it's been a long time coming. feel free to ignore #I've been in a bad place emitionally for a long long time #some recent developments and today's computer incident were just the last straw

42 notes · View notes

lokavisi · 2 days ago

Text

Big this!

I have ADHD. My memory is garbage. Even when doing a particular devotional act is on my mind, my brain still struggles to actually DO it. ADHD brains experience a lot of rejection sensitivity, and that shows up in our relationships with deity, too. In any way shaming folks for not keeping up a regular or particular practice reinforces every negative thought we have about ourselves because we are perpetually convinced that we've upset everyone and we're incapable of doing anything right. Acts of devotion are best done with intention, but that doesn't mean they have to look a certain way. I mean, when memory is an issue and your brain is constantly moving from one thought to the next, simply taking a solid beat to think about your deity and say, "Hey, I'm thinking of you," is a super meaningful gesture. Offering a thought when your thoughts are so scattered is *enough*. Offering a snack whenever you remember to is *enough*. Whatever you do is *enough*. Deity will let you know if there's something more they want, but that does not mean that you failed them by not thinking to do/give them that on your own (or that it took you so long to do what they asked). If anything, to me, it means they're interested in further developing your relationship - the polar opposite of rejection! Don't let anyone make you feel shame for working with any deity, Norse or not, in a way that works for you. You know yourself and your personal relationship with that deity better than anyone else. Do what works best for you and leave the rest behind no matter what your disability may be. ❤️

Just a reminder that having a disability does not stop you from being a good devotee!

Several members of the Norse pantheon have disabilities of some kind. Tyr is missing a hand. Hodr is blind. Odin gave up an eye. Some believe Heimdall gave up his hearing, at least partially. In a culture where modern medicine wasn’t a thing and frequent warfare was, it makes sense that serious injuries and illnesses (both physical and mental) would be fairly common.

Havamal states:

The lame rides a horse, the handless is herdsman, The deaf in battle is bold; The blind man is better than one that is burned, No good can come of a corpse.

But even if the Norse peoples had been completely unsympathetic to individuals with disabilities, it would not be okay to exclude people because of them today. We agree that it’s not a good idea to bring back legalized slavery or human sacrifice, right? The same logic applies to other aspects of life. Our society is built differently, and our technology is different. We aren’t, for the most part, living in small communities that risk starvation if natural disaster strikes. The justification that everyone needs to be healthy and working at full capacity in order to survive does not apply in our society.

So don’t let anyone shame you into believing you aren’t fit to worship the Norse deities. Don’t despair when you can’t worship in the same way a person without a disability could, or when fatigue or pain keep you from doing as many devotional acts as you’d like. The gods understand. Some of them, in a sense, have been there.

-Mod E

#deity work #deity relationships #deity worship #paganism #pagan #heathen #heathenry #adhd #actually adhd #neurodivergent #actually neurodivergent #disability #health #spiritual health #mental health

157 notes · View notes

anistarrose · 4 months ago

Text

You know, I'm starting to think that weird freak incident earlier this year where I wrote essentially a full novel in less than four months, barring editing, has left me with some unrealistic standards regarding turnaround times for all other creative writing endeavors

#back in the day i would take nine months to write less than 4k words about an old man playing checkers with a ghost #and people *loved* it! people ate that shit up!#to this day i struggle to understand what was happening to my brain chemistry when i wrote the 58k monster #or “monsterpiece” as i've dubbed it #i was incapable of thinking of anything else #i look back on those three and a half months through a haze #my wordcount spreadsheet is the only proof i have that the fic didn't spring from my skull fully formed #i exaggerate but i cannot stress enough how abnormal it was for me #i had a thought in the shower one day and the course of the next few months of my life was changed irrevocably #rosalia talks

14 notes · View notes

v-risalab · 7 months ago

Text

I think it's extremely fucked that no matter how many times laios demonstrates how capable and smart he is, ppl keep calling him a himbo just because he acts like an autistic person

#the manga shows you other characters viewing him like this and thinking he is incapable of thinking abt anything else #and then shows you the viewer over and over again how viewing other humans as one dimensional beings does a disservice to everyone involved #dungeon meshi #why do i have to see the worst takes ever #this was caused by ppk saying laios cannot be trans because hes too autistic to care abt gender (??)#but i wanted to make my own post

729 notes · View notes

eggcats · 10 months ago

Text

I'm thinking about radiodust again, but imagine. Alastor and Angel going on an outing for the hotel together.

(Forced bonding activity, maybe. Alastor tries to get out of it by claiming he had things he needed to do and pick up, and Charlie just said Angel can go WITH him instead for it to count.)

Angel is anxious because he KNOWS how it looks to go anywhere with someone. And despite his face he knows Smiles isn't one to take insults lightly.

Alastor, however, THRIVES off attention and people wanting to know what's going on with him. He loves this, it's fueling him. He might ask Angel to accompany him on ALL his outings from now on because the immediate reaction of everyone who sees them is Very Entertaining.

Once Angel realizes that Alastor isn't going to freak on him for all the attention they're getting just by virtue of being there, he starts to enjoy it. It's nice to do something as mundane as going out with someone (even if it ain't a date), without the expectation for how that will end.

PLUS while they're getting a lot of attention, this is one of the first times he's gone anywhere without someone catcalling him or yelling some version of "Slut!" from across the street. (Someone did happen to yell "The RADIO DEMON is fucking ANGEL DUST?!?!" but they didn't remain in the afterlife long, and since then no one has yelled a single thing at him. S'nice.)

It also until that very moment didn't occur to Angel just how much RESPECT he could garner just by being next to Alastor. He goes into a store to pick something up and is just dealing with his normal level of disrespect and harassment before Alastor pops up behind him to see what's taking so long.

It only takes one instance of a tilted head and focused eyes on the sales associate, with a casual "Is there something keeping you, Angel, dear?" for everyone on this side of the pentagram to immediately assume that messing with Angel Dust means messing with none other than the RADIO DEMON. (If it has the added benefit of pissing off the Vox, AND makes Val a bit more wary about messing with Angel, then that's just a bonus.)

You can take this as platonic or romantic, but Angel swoons a bit anyway at the Southern Gentleman treatment, in either case.

And this is the catalyst for them to begin getting along, without Angel feeling the need to put up his over-sexualized porn star persona as his safest way to interact with Alastor.

(IMO, both huskerdust and radiodust work so well because Angel deserves someone who treats him well and respects him for who he is, and not what he can do for them. He deserves a good ol' fashioned lover boy to take care of him, both romantically and platonically, and that's why I love both ships.)

#hazbin hotel #radiodust #alastor #angel dust #hazbin alastor #hazbin angel dust #sometimes the brain rot gets the better of me #i just think they'd have such an interesting dynamic if it ever got explored in the show #fic #mine #long post #?#sorry i just get so many fics and headcanons and the like the SECOND i begin to ship literally anything and im incapable of not making #everyone else see it too

210 notes · View notes

maruyaaya · 3 days ago

Text

AJDHDKDHDU UR GONNA MAKE ME SOB OH MY GOSHHH IM SO GIDDY RN

odysseus and neo are soooo antagonistic in this their dynamic is so fun to write bc neither of them will hesitate to take a cheap shot.

obligatory agamemnon slander it always has to happen i can’t resist it. it’s always so funny to me he’s such an easy target. AND ODYPEN GIGGLING OVER WAR PLANS IS SO REAL TO ME like they flirt by talking abt how they’re gonna destroy their enemies

NEO IS SO FUCKING DOWN BAD it’s so special to me that he is very bad at social interaction. he’s very socially awkward and he struggles with social cues (i’m definitely writing him as neurodivergent even if that will never be like explicitly stated in the fic) and he really struggles with figuring out how telemachus in particular views him. he sees that telemachus’ opinion of him doesn’t actually change when telemachus finds out who he is and he finds that really interesting; it’s one of the reasons why he’s so attracted to telemachus—he feels seen for the first time ever. he doesn’t even mind it when telemachus hates it bc telemachus hates him for who he is rather than for what he did during the war. neo’s also just crazy pathetic wet cat he’s my little freak <3

PTSDYSSEUS LMFAO I SNORTED

u absolutely clocked me YES the love and a slit throat paragraph is one of my favourites because it really encompasses neo in this. his view of love has been completely skewed by his time in the war; he views himself as being incapable of love if it isn’t violent. and then you can contrast his viewpoint with telemachus, who grew up surrounded by love from his mother and he views love as something gentle. they play off each other really interestingly in this regard. telemachus really likes it when he gets to see neo being soft. he feels the most loved when neo is being gentle around him, baring parts of his soul that nobody else gets to see. he wants neo to confess secrets to him and touch him with reverence. on the other hand, neo really likes it when telemachus shows his cruelty. neo likes to see telemachus angry because he feels it’s a more genuine show of who telemachus truly is. and to him, he thinks that everybody else can have the telemachus who is kind and soft, but only he gets to see the one with fire in his eyes and a thirst for blood. the crux of both of them is that they want to see the parts of each other that they hate in themselves.

THE UNDERWORLD BIT WAS SO FUN TO WRITE i love achilles sm and his dynamic with neo is so important to me despite achilles literally never physically appearing in this fic LOL. so much of neo’s actions were influenced by what he thought his father would do and then to learn that achilles regretted the things he did makes him wonder if everything that he did was wrong.

AHAHAHA OH THE POLITES THAT TELEMACHUS REFERS TO ISN’T THE greet the world with open arms <3 polites. the polites referenced is one of priam’s sons and neo kills him during the fall of troy. iirc polites was known for being very fast and during the battle, neo shoots him with an arrow and polites nearly manages to get away, attempting to escape to priam’s palace, but neo follows him and when neo catches up to him, polites prays to the gods to punish neo but neo kills him before anything happens.

HONESTLY UR TOO KIND TO ME i’m blushing kicking my feet twirling my hair rn i’m so happy you like this fic it genuinely means so much to me I APPRECIATE ALL UR ARTS AND SUPPORT SM THANK YOU SO MUCH <3

(ALSO FABLE AND TRUTH IS PROBABLY MY FAVOURITE CHAPTER TITLE it comes from fable by gigi perez and most gigi perez songs are very neomachus coded to me ESPECIALLY sailor song because of the line ‘i don’t believe in god, but i believe that you’re my saviour’ and i just really love gigi perez HAHAHA)

HELLOOOO EVERYBODY!!!

chapter one of my neomachus fic, someday i know you’ll come to your senses, is finally up!! you can check it out HERE!!

#ALL OF UR SUPPORT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME #thank you for listening to my unfathomably long ramblings #we are THE neomachus shippers #fic: someday i know you’ll come to your senses #imeda rambles!!#greek mythology #neoptolemus #pyrrhus #telemachus #neomachus

27 notes · View notes

mollypaup · 5 months ago

Text

i think a really great aspect of oofuri is how much it gets mihashi's ass for being overly timid and dependent. it would be really easy to write off the way he and abe interact as being abe's fault because he is overbearing, and a lot of people do, but it has some really great moments of going "hey, you cannot hide behind abe or depend on him to make every decision. it's not good for you, or him, or the team."

#oofuri #yeah abe is a little overbearing but it is often because mihashi does not make decisions on his own so abe is just filling in the gaps #because he really and truly cannot make a good guess about what mihashi wants #because mihashi has never said anything about what he wants #but any time mihashi has ever voiced a complaint or suggestion abe takes it into account #he is not dismissive #he just doesn't think to ask because 1. mihashi has never given abe a straight answer to anything 2. abe is not very good at being social!!#autistic teen boy who needs things said simply to him paired up with autistic teen boy who thinks saying things simply will get him killed #abe should ask more but mihashi also needs to say more. abe can't read his mind and he shouldn't have to that's not how relationships work #i get a little irritated at the perception that abe is treating mihashi poorly #what is he meant to do when mihashi doesn't talk to him #i am thinking about the scene where tajima gets mad at mihashi #and tells him 'you can't play baseball with just abe'#because mihashi being incapable of speaking his mind and acting on his own isn't good for the team #and abe will pick up the slack but that isn't how things should be #i did not like the bijou game but i really liked it showcasing the strain it put on abe to make all of the calls #and there is a lot there to be said about how his willingness to do everything but actually pitch for mihashi #stems from how bad catching for haruna was for him #because he felt alone at the catcher's plate the same way mihashi did on the mound #and that. fucking scene of abe begging haruna to pitch. augh. he'll do the rest please just pitch #abe can do everything else as long as mihashi stays on the mound #obsessed with mihashi and abe mutually being so worried that the other person will not be there

137 notes · View notes

imminent-danger-came · 2 years ago

Photo

Not to me, not if it’s you.

#this is SO self indulgent #idk if s4 callum's expression for 'it's rotten work' is in character or not but!#I experienced like 15 art blocks trying to doodle this #There was a time where I was like 'maybe I'll line this' but then every sketch was like pulling teeth and I went 'naw'#Seriously a front facing knees up position??? what was I thinking #literally the hardest angle to draw #at one point I was incapable of even drawing a decent face it was maddening #idk do I have anything else to say #ummmmmmmmmmmmmm s4 callum's face in 'not if it's you' was based off his expression when he see's rayla for the first time at the end of 2x02 #thank you Raayllum for giving me Anne Carson brain worms #girl help the human condition #tdp #the dragon prince #rayllum #tdp callum #tdp rayla #tdp art #tdp fanart #the dragon prince art #the dragon prince fanart #art #my art #coloring callum slightly darker in one panel and rayla slightly lighter in another panel for that light v darkness motif #and also to be inconsistent #*dabs*#I thought about doing that for the other panels but then I didn't #anne carson

1K notes · View notes

sallymew4 · 3 months ago

Text

kids when they hear that their dad is back in town VS. kids when theyre hanging out with a conman that accidentally stole their wallet once

im not even joking btw

bonus heres me being crazy about them in dms ^^^

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #shou suzuki #sho suzuki #reigen arataka #i know sho doesnt actually BELIEVE his dad is back but even just that split second reaction is a weird one to have over your dad coming bac #he was like 'say sike rn... wait that aint right.'#shou watching them on the bottom floor while being isolated up in the corner at the end of the third stage play. and saying #'it's nice that they're so easygoing.' all wistfully???? im killing somebody #reigen calling him a poor thing and worrying about him DESPITE knowing his mischievous ways. ugh #gonna quote my reaction to clip rq #'bro [shou] heard him [reigen] talking about guardianship over children and making sure theyre safe over anything else and was like-#'this is getting too real for me i gotta make fun of him immediately.''#idc WHAT yall think to ME that was such a thick layer of defense mechanism that even though reigen's guardianship speech wasnt directed #at Sho he still felt the intrinsic urge to shoot back because of what hes experienced with people who are SUPPOSED to be protecting him.#would yall believe me if i told you i am totally insane #there are SO MANY THINGS. woven into their interactions that really enhance it #its totally silly! yes! but also! it is a legitimate ARC of GROWTH within their relationship! we watch as Sho starts off #with no trust in the man at all (although for a pretty good reason)#and over time he realizes hes NOT total shitbag #of course this doesnt mean hes completely vulnerable with him. its easy to infer that his distrust in certain people is formed from #a lifetime of being let down and incapability of dependency on certain trusted adults. his defense must be so heavily built up #even after gaining some sort of trust from Shou Reigen will NOT be exempt from his impish defense mechanisms.#sho will not make himself emotionally available as he would then be open to being hurt by someone else he thought could trust #his 'carefree and prankish' behavior is the wall between himself and such an intense feeling of disappointment and hurt and loneliness #but i like to think hes also just silly. hehe #man that stage play huh. shoots every fatal drug directly into my bloodstream #shou's trust and father issues VS stupid conman who has the common sense to not let children be beat up by grown ass adults. who will win.#i mightve forgotten something but. i think this is pretty packed full already so i am pleased. thank you for reading <3 #meowmeow art

44 notes · View notes

cream-and-tea · 3 months ago

Text

oh pallas and agnes power dynamic you really are SO unbelievably fucked,,,,,

#haven’t been able to write in days so i am posting instead. forgive me.#it’s just so. like. okay pallas has all of the material power here that’s not a question they’ve got much stronger magic they #know how the library works they’re directly placed in a mentorship role at the beginning re agnes she depends on them #for everything.#but also #pallas is very much Not Doing Well mentally (<- understatement of the century) and is pathologically incapable of processing their own #emotions related to this AT ALL. and in the process of trying very very hard to get to Know pallas (so pallas will Like her so pallas will #want to keep her alive) agnes kind of comes to understand a lot of pallas’s issues even better than pallas does and pallas starts to depend #on her for emotional support in a way they NEVER have with anyone else.#and pallas’s ability to show vulnerability has been soooo wrecked beyond belief that to them doing things like sharing part #of their backstory and being visibily hurt around someone is tantamount to placing a knife in someone’s hand and #then circling all of their weak points with a giant red marker while going ‘HEY STAB HERE’#so in their mind by doing this they’re giving agnes an IMMENSE amount of power over them like enough to kill them dead even though very #little else has changed about their dynamic. so pallas believes that they’re standing on much more equal ground then they really are #and agnes partly believes it too she thinks that by seeing this much of how broken down pallas is she’s finally found the balance in their #relationship she’s finally found a way to make it stable. and yeah. to some extent this is true!#pallas DOES listen to agnes more than any other person agnes IS the first person in years to understand them this much pallas’s dependence #on her for their mental wellbeing DOES give her some measure of power over them. but that power is given out on pallas’s terms is the thing #whether they’re aware of that or not. agnes wouldn’t have anything if pallas didn’t actively choose to be vulnerable with her there’d be #no way she’d learn about anything no way she’d get to play this role in their life #they believe that this thing is much more equal much more sustainable than it really is (pallas especially) and they’re #literally all each other have #grabs your face are you listening THEYRE ALL EACH OTHER HAVE IN THIS PLACE THEYRE BOTH IN SUCH HORRIFIC SITUATIONS AND THEY R EATING #EACHOTGER TO SURVIVE!!!!#head in fucking hands #wip: ghost story #pallas and agnes

32 notes · View notes

lemongogo · 2 months ago

Text

oo u want 2 draw soo bad..

#i hate that my ability to draw is so conditional #its soo frustrating but i dont know how to break it. this has been the one thing thats never changed.ill never be free #times like rn i just do studies but its soo fking BORINGGG euuhh...#but if i try 2 draw something for funsies i just stare at the blank canvas. literally immobile. & u know how people r like just draw #something anyways. a line. something. and its like no i cant do that oi cant even do that u underestimate my freak #i want 2attack myself from the pov of someone else #i think im having the realization tht i will never be able to do art stuff frls and its driving me crazy i think.#like im actually sick and unwell frm the thought of it.my friend commissioned me and im ab 2 send the money back #after two weeks bc i cant do it im literally frozen dude.i want 2 cry and die and explode into a million pieces #wait im back to add more.idk if anyone feels the same way but its like. i know its entirely a Me issue its a mental block issue #theres something thats not connecting in my head but its like.why is it so easy for everyone else ykwim...and thats a lie too right #like everyone else struggles w art and its not.it cant exist Without you struggling and practicing hard and trusting yourself #but in my brain im just convinced that like.i cant do this i cant do this like everyone else can do it like second nature and it freaks me #tf out #but also its the one thing i want to do more than anything else in my life and so like if i cant do it i dont know what to do.ughh.#not me freaking the fuck out rn lawl.lols.even #and on top of it i feel like i cant express myself well and i think my friend. < SOOO awesome and well meaning and NICE and legitimately #pushing me to try and believe that i can do this stuff but i feel like they wont understand the sort of like.mental block im struggling wit #like its less that i hate my art or something i dont its more like.i just feel soo physically restrained and incapable of doing it.suddenly #i cant think and i cant do anything.i have no creativity i have no ideas my mind is quite literally blank and empty

31 notes · View notes

makotonaegiunderstander · 10 months ago

Text

something I’ve been thinking abt is how many people think Makoto is immune to despair. I don’t think he is. I think becoming the ultimate Hope was BECAUSE he felt despair. He wouldn’t have fully reached that point without Junko. Makoto becoming such a beacon was his last attempt to avoid completely falling and it wasn’t because he didn’t feel despair, it was because he was too damn stubborn to allow everything to go to waste and he refused to sacrifice his beliefs for someone else’s. His inner monologue tells me he DID experience the same new low the other suvivors did in the final trial, but at the point where he had the choice to give up and die, he looked at the others and he looked at Junko and he couldn’t allow it to happen, not out of self preservation, but because the idea that Junko would have control over their lives made him FURIOUS. and that utter refusal to die kicked in, wether luck or otherwise, and he made the concious effort for one last push while something in him was breaking. He had to be broken in order for the Ultimate Hope to come through so aggressively, bc it could only exist in the face of the Ultimate Despair. He snapped the same way she did, but in the other direction. In what could have been his final moments he chose to embody everything Junko wasn’t, and every single optimistic and luck fueled ideal in him suddenly charged forward and pushed him. It was a combination of the final straw and a choice. Makoto isn’t immune to feeling despair, he’s just too stubborn to fall into it of his own volition. I think that’s why I like that scene in DR3 so much. People were SO SHOCKED Makoto actually fell for the tape, that he actually became despair for a moment. I saw people getting mad or disappointed, saying it was pathetic and Makoto seemed to fall from some sort of pedestal for them. Honestly part of me wonders if that sort of mentality, which clearly people had in universe, affected Makoto a bit. Like he started to see himself as less of a person, subconsciously. Prompting him to take more risks, less self preservation, act way more bold. It seems he has to be reminded a lot not to put himself in danger by his friends, to not do something too reckless. All over the place I would see in regards to that scene either this frivolous ‘oh this was just angst drama with no meaning behind it’ or ‘he can do better than that. he’s so weak’ or ‘come on, there’s no way he’d fall into despair, he’s the Ultimate Hope!’ This kind of mentality, which was kind of ironic considering Ryota was there the entire time saying the same thing and treating Makoto the same way. Like Makoto was superhuman. Like Makoto didn’t feel despair the same way ‘normal people’ did. In a way that was also how Munakata saw Makoto. Makoto stopped being a PERSON to the world when he became Ultimate Hope, he became a concept, a belief system, much the same way Junko ascended beyond herself. But the difference is that treating Makoto that way is the opposite of the reason Makoto became such a representative for hope. He wasn’t doing something no one else could. He was doing something everyone had the chance to, he just… was a little more optimistic, a little more stubborn, a little more ‘gung-ho’ about things. He just took the lead where no one else did, where no one else knew they even COULD in the face of Junko’s unstoppable force. She had overcome the biggest threats and obstacles in the world, what could one person do? And the answer Makoto found was, anything. Everything. It doesn’t all rest on Makoto, he’s just the one that was inspired to try to do what seemed like the impossible. But as evidenced by the change in his friends after that trial, it’s clearly not something only Makoto is capable of. The others pulled out of despair thanks to Makoto, but it was their choice to do so.

“But… this world is so huge, and we’re so small. What can we do…? No, we can probably do anything. Yeah! We can do anything!”

#makoto naegi #Danganronpa character analysis #Danganronpa #danganronpa thh #danganronpa future arc #I fucking love Makoto Naegi man.#I think there’s a fine line of nuance to Makoto that’s easy to miss bc he doesn’t really make it known #he’s not a pushover and he’s not overpowered. he’s a people pleaser but he will say what needs to be said #he’s an immovable object and the exact opposite of Junko but he’s also just a normal guy who’s optimistic and (un)lucky #he isn’t invincible but he has immense power to his words the same way Junko did #if anything his superpower is being kind above all else. he’s compassionate to some of the worst people in the world.#he was even conpassionatr to an extent to Junko. he didnt want her to kill herself despite everything she’s done #and he still acknowledges that for years she was a classmate and friend.#I do think the more he learned abt what she did the more he’s come to actually hate her though #post the first game he always refers to her without a suffix to her name which is one of the most subtle rude things you can do #it means you have zero respect for the person you’re referring to #and he speaks about her with some venom he doesn’t use for anyone else in the future arc #he’s not incapable of feeling negative emotions #I really liked the future arc scene bc it showed that Makoto DID experience enough despair to have overcome him if he didn’t refuse #and that it still affects him deeply. people treat him like he’s either this perfect ideal Chad or this baby chick who’s so delicate #and no one really focuses on how makoto shoulders so much and yet is still vulnerable.#honestly that guy was DUE for a mental breakdown even without the tape. it would have happened eventually #I actually wrote one based on him finally hitting a breaking point after giving so much of himself away and keeping nothing for himself #that his issues that he shoves down constantly finally can’t be held down anymore. Hajime helps him bc he knows how that feels #it was a LONG time ago that I wrote that but honestly if I can remember where i was going w it I might finish it #it was initially an rp but I could make it a fic #anyway. the point is Makoto is SO much more complex than people give him credit for #the most fundamental thing about him is that he’s normal and that’s ok! that’s what helps him rise!

74 notes · View notes