#i was going to force myself to do stretches but tbh i don't think i can

[toopunkrockforshul]

I can't even remember the last time I was this physically tired ugh

[biggothbelly]

You know, I've watched you spiral out of control for years at this point. I remember first finding you back in 2016. None of us really knew it then because you were so much smaller in comparison to the mass of lard you are now, but you were already too far gone to go back. Year after year, I watched you shovel endless amounts of calories down your throat, blowing your poor belly up so many times with a disgusting amount of food on such a regular and consistent basis, that there was no question that you were gonna get huge. However, I don't think anyone knew just how far you'd take it. I mean, look at you. Every ounce of your body is covered in fat. That tiny gut was forced to blow up into the massive, turgid, hanging food balloon we see it as today. You've forever ruined your skin and put so many deep, long, eye-catching stretch marks on your fucking gut. You've grown into nothing but a walking garbage disposal, and I'm sure you could easily outeat several grown men and still be begging for more food. The most shocking part is the fact that even though you're so close to 300 lbs, your greedy ass still wants to keep going. What's it gonna take to stop you? 300? 400? 500? What number could possibly scare you at this point? 600? 700? 800? I mean, if you're gonna go that far, you might as well just make a spectacle of yourself and go for an even 1000 lbs of pure blubber and lard. You'd be more relatable to a whale than a human at that point, especially with how much grease and junk it would take just to make you feel not hungry. No, not full, definitely not stuffed to the gills, but just enough so you can go without eating for more than 20 minutes. Let's just face it, you're fucked. You were fucked the moment you willingly decided to stuff your face for the first time because you wanted to see how good it would feel. Now look at you. You're an ever-growing blob that's just can't help themselves. You're never gonna try to lose the weight because you love being a fat slob so fucking much. You love how good it feels to eat and eat and eat until your stomach is begging you to stop and the weight of your poor, overfilled gut is pinning you down, so you couldn't even get up to get more food if you tried. I'd love to see you try to prove me wrong, but we all know you wouldn't last a day trying to lose weight.

This is the most inspiring ask I’ve ever received hehe tbh reading this made me hungryyyyy idk what I’ve done to myself tbh 😅 if went from something fun and every now and then to having to constantly feed my belly bc I’m always hungry and always so lazy I barely want to get up. I’ve given myself quiteeee the food addiction at this point all I ever do is think about eating and growing this belly. The idea of ever having to lost weight scared me bc I know I couldn’t handle it and I don’t think my belly would let me 😳😵‍💫 it’s hard lifting this gut around daily it’s so heavy my back and knees hurt all the time and a new thing I noticed is that my hips are starting to hurt when I walk. Now walking is getting harder and harder 🐖 I always feel like I have to sit my fat ass down. Who knows maybe one day I’ll be on my 600 pound life 🥴🫠 I have a seriousssss problem it seems hehe and you guys keep enabling me hehehe

[devdevlin]

A brief (and inappropriate) retelling of Hermione's polyjuice incident.

DON'T ASK. I don't know where this came from, ok? Ok. My pregnancy brain is fried and apparently, I don't know what shame is anymore, so here you go, have an odd and uncalled for drabble. I'd say don't judge me... but tbh, I probably deserve it 🤷‍♀️

"Ahh!"

At the distant, high-pitched scream, Tom slowly lowered his newspaper.

There was a concerning stretch of silence, until a quiet shuffling from upstairs started; hurried, panicked footsteps, ones that told him he needn't get up. Whatever the problem was, it would undoubtedly come to him.

Tom resumed his reading.

Sure enough, not even five minutes later, and the footsteps gradually pattered their way down the stairs.

"...Tom?" he soon heard echoing in from the other room.

"...Yes?"

"Can you... I think I need your..."

Hermione, he knew, would rather eat her own pants than come to him for help, and so, properly intrigued, Tom folded his paper and put it aside. "What's wrong?"

There was another pause and some more shuffling from the doorway, before a quiet, "do you promise not to laugh?"

Tom laughed. "That will depend on what you're about to say."

"Tom!"

"Tell me what's wrong."

"Promise you won't laugh!"

"Fine, fine, I won't laugh," he promised, leaning forward eagerly in his chair. "Just come out. You're starting to worry me."

Another stretch of quiet. But then, right as Tom was about to get up and force her out—

Hermione stepped into the room.

Tom prided himself on his self-control. It was one of his best qualities, one that set him far apart from the rest of his peers, but even he wasn't above snorting at the sight of her.

She immediately turned and walked back out.

Tom, at a complete loss, covered his mouth and muffled his chortling as he got up and followed after her. "I'm sorry," he called out. "Wait, really— I'm sorry. It just wasn't what I was expecting, that's all."

He caught her in the kitchen, where she whirled back and glared at him. "You promised!"

"I did, I know. I'm sorry," he said, but he wasn't really. Because with a pair of ginger ears and a squashed nose, with her pants riding low enough on her hips for a long, bushy tail to poke out the top, she looked... hilariously...

Cute.

"Are you going to help me or not?!" she snapped, gesturing to herself.

Tom looked her down and up, taking her all in. Huh. She had claws, too. "How did this happen?"

"I... a little bit of polyjuice, is all. But I must've added the wrong hair..."

"It would seem so," he said. "Whatever were you playing with polyjuice for?"

"I... well... I just wanted to... surprise you," she admitted. "I know you don't like to celebrate, but I thought... it's your thirtieth. I had to do something, and I thought this might be a way to do it that you'd be okay with."

"You thought I'd like it if your gift... was yourself in the form of a cat?"

"No! No, not a cat..."

"Who were you supposed to be, then?" he asked suspiciously.

"...N-no one."

"Hermione."

"I..." she sighed, and then grudgingly muttered, "I was trying to turn myself into you."

This time, he tried—he really did—but his laugh couldn't be helped.

"Tom!"

"Sorry, sorry," he repeated, "I'm sorry. But, honestly, why would you—"

"I have another batch upstairs," she said, flushing. "Once I was you, I was going to come down and offer you the other batch, so that you could turn into me, and then... I thought we could... you know."

Slowly, as her words sunk in, Tom grinned a wide, involuntary grin. "Actually... now that you say that... I'm not quite sure I do know," he said, stepping towards her. "Why don't you tell me more?"

Hermione crossed her arms. "This is humiliating enough without you rubbing it in! You know what I mean!"

"Do I?"

Her ears flattened.

"Well..." he said, pressing his lips together to keep from laughing again as he closed further in. "As unfortunate as this all is... it doesn't all have to be for nought. Maybe we can still... make this work."

"...I beg your pardon?"

"Just me... you..." He leaned into her and reached around to trail his hand along her thigh, until he reached the base of her tail at her waistband. He gently gripped the base. "...and your tail..."

He slipped his fingers down the length of it, over the silken, ginger fur, until she swatted him off.

"No! I— stop that!"

"Why?" he said. "It'll take hours to wear off. I can think of several good uses for all this until then."

"Absolutely not!" she snapped, pushing back from him. "Wh-what do you mean, good uses?"

"What do you think I mean?"

"I... I think that if you can't help me, then I'd rather not know about—ahh!"

As she'd turned to storm off, Tom took hold of her tail and pulled, hard enough that she stumbled back, her back colliding flush against his front.

"Something like this, I think," he murmured low in her ear, keeping his grip on her tail tight, holding her in place.

"Tom, that—ow, that hurts."

"Good."

She tugged to free herself, but Tom didn't let go, and twisted them to shove her forward, pinning her between himself and the counter.

"Ow, I mean it!" she hissed.

"So do I," he drawled, and now that he had her pinned, he took her tail in his other hand too, and sliding it up, right to the base, and stroking down its length firmly. "Tell me... what does it feel like?"

The tip of her tail twitched against his leg at his touch. "It's... ah, um," she squeaked. "Sensitive."

"Is it? Well, why don't we find out just how sensitive it is..."

"Tom—"

"Shh, shh," he shushed, slipping his fingers around the tail and down, down beneath the waistband of her pants to where the fur ended and the smooth patch of skin just below it started.

He felt it as she shivered and a tremor jolted up her spine, joined by a quiet, gentle—

"Oh," he breathed, "you can purr?"

"I... I didn't know... I didn't mean to..."

Tom laughed into her neck. She sounded mortified.

"It's all right," he told her, stroking even lower, brushing right against where the skin became silky and started to pucker. "I don't mind, but... now that you mention it, I do wonder how it'd feel if you purred with my dick in your—"

"Tom!"

"I'm just curious. It is my birthday, after all..."

[fangirl-erdariel]

One thing that's jumped at me on my most recent reread (well, i'm listenibg to an audiobook, but either way) of LOTR, is that Aragorn has this... honestly quite specific way he responds to feeling like he has made a mistake (whether or not the audience or even the narrative would blame him for that, which is neither here nor there for my current point), that I feel like a lot of the fandom (myself included) and a lot of fanfics don't really get, and that doesn't really carry over to the movie adaptation either

Like, on one hand, verbally he's going to beat himself up about it, he's going to go "oh i have messed this up!" very much out loud

But then at the same time, he doesn't really let that halt him, like, he's still gonna get back to going and act to salvage the situation as best he can very quickly, possibly even while he is still beating himself up about it

And like we do see him do this a bunch. Most noticeably of course over the stretch from Rauros to Fangorn, Breaking of the Fellowship and Boromir's death to meeting Gandalf the White, but before that too

At Weathertop, we get him going argh i've been too careless and impatient. But there's no way to turn back time, the enemy has now spotted them and some of the signs there might have been about recent goings-on were messed up before he could investigate them, so all that can be done is prepare and stand their ground as best they can, and deal with the consequences when they come

After the Fellowship escapes Moria, as they're making toward Lothlórien, you get the, oh shit i forgot you were injured i'm really sorry about that i was concentrating on getting distance between us and the orcs you should've said something (tbh out of everything, this instance is in my opinion the least amount his fault). But all that can be done is carry Frodo and Sam until they reach a place where they can stop for a bit, and then tend to their injuries, which is what he does without further delay

Those are the main ones I can think of off the top of my head (there's maybe a couple others but those are too vague and dependent on reader's interpretation of tone to feel worth including), but I feel like it is enough to start making a pattern

Interestingly, he doesn't do it when the attempt to cross Caradhras (which in the book was because of Aragorn's insistence to avoid Moria if at all possible; in the movie it's played a bit differently) ends in them all nearly freezing to death. Whether it's because at first he's busy not freezing to death and getting back down from the mountain and not being killed by wargs, and then he's busy acting like he's not fucking terrified of going into Moria because of some past traumatic experience we never get any more information on, or because however much he hates the idea, the back-up plan of going through Moria is already in place, or because he trusts Gandalf to be able to keep things in control, or what, i'm not sure, but it's the one major exception i can think of.

And it's not really uncertainty or indecisiveness or self-doubt, even though I can see how it would easily read that way, especially if the only example that's ever caught your eye is the bit after Rauros (like, at that point, he does genuinely doubt himself a bit, and it does mix together with his beating himself up over his mistakes, but the source of the self-doubt still is not in his general way of reacting to his mistakes, but rather because he's been forced two choose between two roads that both felt to him like his duty, and he's still not certain he chose the right one).

Really, it seems like it's just... well, just his way of reacting. Maybe it's venting his frustrations, maybe it's reminding himself how careful he must be, how little he can afford mistakes, that he can't allow himself to make this mistake in the future. Maybe just generally being harsh on himself. But whatever it is, it's not, I think, doubt or uncertainty, it's a separate thing.

Anyway yeah idk what my conclusion here actually is but. Just an observation I've made recently aboyt the ways Aragorn tends to act

[pleasestaywithmedarling]

Author Ask Game

Thanks for the tag @starlit-hopes-and-dreams!

I'll gently tag @verkja, if you'd like, cause I am SO excited that I should finally have time soon to start reading your work, and I'd love to hear more about it if you're down! And of course, anyone is welcome to jump in; please tag me if you do!

I only have one fic on this side of the internet, so this will all be about my WIP Sin of Purity, Purity of Sin.

What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

I personally don't vibe with the idea of writing "lessons." I guess the ideas that have been sticking out to me the most have probably been guilt and innocence, and the way the past can recontextualize the present and vice versa. But that's just me; I'm sure anyone could read this and see something completely different.

Or maybe we're all just here for the whump :)

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

Disclaimer: I have nothing at all against any religion that is not causing anyone harm; there are obviously a lot of wonderful religions and religious people in the world, and I 100% support that.

That being said, the key feature of the worldbuilding in this fic is the official religion of the kingdom, and that was very much inspired by my own wildly toxic religious upbringing. Before I started writing, I didn't really bother to plan out what most writers would consider the basic features of a fantasy world--I don't think I even got around to naming the kingdom the story takes place in until maybe a half-dozen chapters in. But I had worked out a lot about the fundamental theology and practices of the worship of Vato, the way the temple system is organized, the relationship between the temple and the culture and subcultures of the kingdom, the doctrines and practices that are basically arbitrary or just make no sense, etc. And all of it draws pretty heavily from my own experiences with the type of churches that I grew up in.

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

Okay so the obvious answer is that Anden and Kiri are both trying to gain their freedom. But Anden would prefer to achieve that by his own strength--he doesn't like feeling weak, and to him being forced to rely on others can sometimes feel like weakness. And Kiri...I think Kiri would prefer the temple simply have a change of heart and let them go lol

If there's anything that I'm trying to achieve with them, I guess it's just the catharsis that I personally get from watching them suffer together the different ways that they're growing, both individually and together.

How many chapters is your story going to have?

No idea! The events of the story are all mapped out, but I'm letting myself just experiment and have fun with this fic, and I'm really trying to embrace serialization rather than try to match the pacing of a typical novel. I would say that the chapter I'm currently working on is right at the midpoint of the narrative arc--if that term even applies to my unstructured mess of a plot--but that may or may not mean I'm at the halfway point in terms of the chapter count. The back half of the second act could end up stretching out a good half dozen chapters, or for all I know it'll only take, like, two. And how long will the third act be? Who knows? Not me!

Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Unusually for me, this is an original. I will probably just keep in here on tumblr; idk if I'd want it on my AO3 account with my fanfiction--it feels odd to me to mix the two.

When and why did you start writing?

I started this one I think about a month and a half ago--it has not been long! Tbh I'd had a pretty awful summer, and I'd been getting back into reading whump as a form of escapism. Had the idea for this one, and I realized it would do me a lot of good to have an outlet just making something I want to make, just cause I want to make it, and not worry about how good it is or what other people think about it. This is easily the most self-indulgent work I've ever written, and it makes me so happy to hear that anyone else is enjoying it too!

Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

Idk, you do you!

Oh gosh I hate doing these because I am SO forgetful and I feel like I always leave off a favorite blog! But here's a sampling of writers whose works I've been really enjoying this past year: @i-can-even-burn-salad, @little-peril-stories, @clairelsonao3, @dont-touch-my-soup, @whumpcereal, and of course @starlit-hopes-and-dreams who I guess I'm tagging twice in one post!

Blank questions below:

What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

How many chapters is your story going to have?

Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

When and why did you start writing?

Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

[mecachrome]

Hello, I was reading your about me post and it's very impressive that you've studied six languages! Did you learn them at school? Do you have any tips / resources for language practice (I have a goal of reaching german B2 by next March but I'm really struggling lol). Have a nice day!

hey anon!!! tbh i don't really consider myself an inherently good language learner but it's a mix of heritage + upbringing + personal interest hlksdjfh, if you asked me for a composite fluency score with everything rated out of 1 it'd be more like...... 3.4 languages though 😔 also without constant practice it's been atrophying a lot lately </3 but the reason is basically that i attended several multilingual schools growing up and by middle school was formally studying 4 languages (+ weekly latin that i remember absolutely nothing of LMFAO) and at home i also already speak 3 of those languages with my parents.

the only 2 languages i started properly studying as an adult are korean and german for similar reasons really (i've been into k-pop for half my life so i took a few semesters in undergrad for fun, with german i got into german media, was really enamored with its grammatical complexity, and then self-studied a few notebooks before taking it in university)... as for how to study and practice, i'd say it definitely depends on the language & language family, how much you're able to or willing to immerse yourself, what your specific goals are in terms of proficiency, and ofc what your existing weaknesses are!!! for ex spanish is a lot easier with a french background and japanese is a lot easier with a korean background compared to, say, the other way around, so personally when i was learning korean vocabulary a lot of times i'd check the root to see if it had a sino-korean origin and that helped a lot with memorization. also with languages like korean and german that have many unintuitive grammar rules for native english speakers, i'd argue that it's super super important to spend a lot more time learning those rules and practicing complex sentence construction than with a romance language for example; french has a lot of weird pronunciation and conjugation rules but overall it's not... really that hard. one thing you can do to practice is to start with a very simple sentence (my name is x / the apple is red / etc.) and then keep building clauses on top of it one-by-one to force yourself to use complex structures without overwhelming yourself trying to write the end product all at once, and then slowly build up confidence that way...

then of course i'd say that it's important to balance different kinds of media and study materials if you want to stretch your language-learning muscles and have a more "comprehensive" understanding. so for german this was during the pandemic and what i'd do was find example texts/stories/children's books/fairy tales and record myself reading them so i could listen back on my pronunciation, then for grammar i self-studied 2 textbooks by myself every single day, and for vocabulary + some other grammar tips i did basically the full duolingo tree but i always tried to treat it as a supplemental resource that wasn't crucial to the learning experience (imo it's pretty bad for non-latin scripts though c__c but i thought german was decent). i also did a lot of random a2/b1 online preparation exams for fun shdklfh but i think b2 is a much higher jump so it's probably not that helpful... i also liked to translate song lyrics and another thing i did was watch a show i liked without subtitles and i'd take a whole scene and transcribe what the characters were saying + translate them line-by-line and then double check with the subtitles afterward. but again to me a lot of this was kind of for Fun so i learned a lot of things in isolation and less with the intention of "i'm going to move to this country and that's why i need to learn the language ASAP," so ofc in that case the best way is really to immerse yourself in an environment where you're forced to speak it or to converse with native speakers (if you can find a buddy who speaks german to converse with regularly that'd be a massive boost) you'll almost always learn fastest that way.

like even though i took university courses and learned proper grammar a lot of the korean vocabulary i've learned is kind of like... hsdflhdf internet/fandom-specific, because i'd "immerse" myself by reading fan forums and follow fan accounts and stuff that use a lot of slang and practice my listening by subtitling vlive videos or watching unsubbed idol videos and a lot of that lingo isn't really useful in everyday contexts LOL—which i was fine with and doing on purpose because i don't intend to move to korea and that's the context i had the most use for. but some other languages i know i find more important to be able to speak rather than read because i do need to use them in conversation with relatives and acquaintances around me. so basically the important thing is really being able to pinpoint both your needs and weaknesses — for ex do i need to be better at listening or reading or speaking, is there a certain verb tense or irregular case that i always mess up (if so, note them down and then dedicate a day to just practicing THAT specific concept or until you're confident with it), do i have the basics down but my vocabulary is lacking, do i just not have enough confidence in speaking and get overwhelmed trying to converse with native speakers? — then you can determine the best course of action from there i think... it's basic but just having a consistent practice routine is important even if you're just doing a little bit, like you definitely shouldn't burn yourself out but incorporating some reading every day or continuously reviewing vocabulary can help to stay immersed. and don't be afraid to consume children's media and also don't be afraid to consume more complex media and Not Understand Everything, you have to be comfortable with being confused before it starts making sense you know... idk if that's much help but good luck!!!

[socialbunny]

A,I, V and X for the ask game :D

putting this under a cut bc i wrote that long thing abt bella goth lmaooo if tumblr lets me tumblr never lets me put shit under the cut the first time >:(

Favourite CC Creator

going to force myself to namedrop creators instead of just saying everyone you and roguebotanist for the mm hair retextures yall do, deedeesims, nikki platasp ofc bc she makes so much quality shit its crazy, anyone that does poppetv2 hairs bc i'm lazy sometimes <3, anyone that makes male clothing that isn't butt ugly (can't name a specific person lol a lot of male s4 clothes just look bad in ts4 and in ts2), io for unique and new clothes meshes, ummmm some other ppl i'm forgetting lmao im thinking too hard abt it and if i think too hard they really cant be my favorite huh? so yah

shoutout to all my mutuals tho that make cc <3 i love all u guys sm i just cant think of names for some reason <3333 i should probably just make an oldschool blogroll or follow forever :/ or some shit

Your Bella Goth Theories!

i wrote wayyyyy too much sorry this is more of a plot i have in my head than anything 😭

she did get abducted by aliens, but they all started freaking out due to kidnapping THE bella goth instead of that lame slut that nobody cares about 😒 they don't really need the flack of capturing a well-known person again. it makes what they do soooo much harder 🙄 so after panicking for a bit they just drop her ass right outside of strangetown fuck it.

congruently, daddy bigbucks and his bestie attorney lily gates are on their way to strangetown to start that bullshit ass show he makes, but this time on the way a wormhole opens up in the sky and the bigbucks from the end of the gba game (you know, when his shit ends up coming back to bite him in the ass), falls from the sky and causes them to have an accident, and the gba!bigbucks takes over their operation. they happen upon bella and take her hostage too, and really start monetizing on the "bella got abducted by aliens" story. merch, signs, ads in the paper, they bring on a look-alike bella to walk around strangetown and eat out of the trash act nothing like bella so ppl can talk and call the hotline they bought. really banking on this.

after some time passes and they're racking in a moderate amount of money, gba!bigbucks decides that the original idea he had with the strangetown reality show could work with pv/st/vv is in it too lets pretend there's a reason why it was incorporated. they have the money, the inkling of a plot that could go any way possible, all they needed to do was put that shit into action.

bella during all of this is just living lavish in bigbucks mansion. as time goes on the urge + guilt to go back to her family lessens more and more as the frankly fucked up reality tv plans grows. technically she's even more of star now than she was before, but she's more subdued to the public because she's never really cared about 'fame' in regards to the public. the only things she does now are be the "woman that got abducted" and show up in the show sometimes to stir some shit, and hang with her friends and make moneyyyyyyy. she gets to be beautiful and fabulous and gorgeous with few responsibilities and that's how its been for almost 20 years :3

ask me more abt this if anybody wants tooo i skimmed details in my head bc i realized i was stretching the word "theory" out.

How Did You Start Playing the Sims?

probably would have the same answer as here :)

Do you use the Lifetime or Career Rewards?

nooo i don't. they're just so boring to me and i always forget they exist tbh

[time-to-write-and-suffer]

Hi! I agree with a lot of your criticism towards twc3, biggest issues imo being 1. increasingly weaker writing for the characters 2. weak plot. I'm curious: if you could prioritize fixing only one (for example: great plot with increased/meaningful branching but relationship writing stays as in book 3) what would you pick/believe would serve the series best going forward?

The focus has always been on the romance, and that's what I would prioritize if forced to make the choice, and it's one that would please the most fans as nobody's here for the plot. However, I don't believe that the choice is necessary, and that both can be improved simultaneously without sacrificing the other. Simply put, it needs to be scaled down, and it needs to be more focused. I would prefer shorter books, with tighter plots, fewer but more meaningful variations, and less wordy and more purposeful writing.

I know that M!shka has the whole thing vaguely planned out, given that we knew it'd be seven books from the start, but whatever her outlining process is, it's just not visible on the page. I'm honestly starting to think she said seven because it sounded cool, and not because she actually had anything to fill each book with. 3 reads like it's a bunch of random Patreon drabbles slapped together and barely connected by time skips.

Most of the issues -- the cheap and OOC romance interactions, the vague plot, the dropped subplots -- could be solved by just removing a lot of the unecessary fluff and by focusing in on one thing and tying everything else back to it. And I'm not saying that it needs to be plot progression and action all the time, not at all, but there needs to be a throughline that connects what's on the page to the overall story, that justifies the words put in front of the reader. I just don't see that focus and that artistic vision here. It's a bunch of bullshit that doesn't stick together.

Reading book 1 compared to 2 and 3 is so wack, because at the end of book 1, there were so many interesting and exciting possibilities. It felt as though there were many different and equally worthwhile plots that could be explored in the next books. And then you read book 2 and go "Oh ok? So I ... I guess the romances will progress in the next one? That's neat. And there might be some even bigger bad on the horizon?" Then you read book 3 and what do you feel? I felt nothing, aside from anger maybe. Because all you get is like, a half-assed climax and then a cheap teaser. Does it feel like the story is going somewhere? Like there are infinite possibilities to explore? Like we're building up to something? No, not really. That's what's lacking, a vision, a vector that guides your thoughts forward based on the movement of the previous books. Book 3 sorta meanders about and then falls face-down on the ground.

For book 4, I would probably, once again, stop trying to one-up myself with bigger and badder plots and have a smaller mystery happen, something more character-focused and maybe relevant to the detective personally, and give each LI a distinct subplot that ties into the main mystery. Because you decided your LI in book 1, it also opens up the opportunity to make the mystery tailored to the LI. That way, both the main plot and the detective being an actual detective feels interesting and hooks you in, while also providing plenty of romance opportunities and character development.

I also think that having 7 books, combined with having the PC be a detective, and the thing being set in a small town ... Idk, it was the perfect setup for having semi-independent, smaller mystery stories, all connecting together by the romances and characters, and slowly building up to something bigger by leaving crumbs in each book. Just a lot of missed opportunities, tbh. People who say "omg it's just a small cute romance game!! Stop trying to make it more than it is!" but I'm not? I'm all about making it SMALLER and MORE romance-focused! It's when it stretches and tries to do bigger things and overreaches that you start seeing how thin the fabric is.

Obviously it's easy to sit here and think you could do better, and honestly I don't know if I could or if my fixes would actually improve anything, but if given her resources, I'd damn sure try to lol.

[memorymessage]

so, gender dysphoria + body dysmorphia + general body insecurity regarding... boobs (because i don't technically know what to classify it under)

as detailed in my story about growing up with weight and eating issues, i became slightly overweight just before the start of puberty. i don't know if that was a contributing factor, but, whatever the case, when i developed breasts, they got covered in stretch marks. i quickly grew into a C cup at age 13, and the stretch marks were so severe, they looked like fresh scars—red and inflamed.

inevitably, because of this, my chest became one of my deepest insecurities, in tandem with my weight insecurity. one time, my little cousin, maybe around age 5 at the time, saw the tops of my scars when i was wearing a tank top, and she asked me (innocently, because she was just a child and didn't know it would upset me) if i got into an accident. let's just say i never forgot that encounter on a scale of 'interactions that forever changed my perception of myself.'

i would say this was one of the reasons i started only wearing tops and swimsuits that covered my entire chest, but, tbh, i ascribe that insecurity to the struggle with eating disorders and general BDD. i had this notion that if a top was too low cut and exposed too much skin, it would make me look too wide. i also thought my pale chest skin didn't give enough contrast to my face and brought out my dark facial acne spots in comparison to my white chest. i still carry these ideas and base my wardrobe off of them to this day.

having stretch marks was just the icing on top of every BDD and ED based decision.

also, i never had a, ahem, "perky" chest shape. and being surrounded by the perfect-skin-having, skinny, braless 2000s media forced a realization on me that my chest just did not look like the pretty people's, fairly early on in life. not only that, but my whole entire body didn't look like the pretty people's.

then, the gender dysphoria aspect mixes in to the insecurities already present and blurs the lines of ascribing which behavior to which diagnosis.

when i was 15-16, i had an era where i wanted to identify as straight and cis as possible (i didn't know what trans and cis, etc. was back then, but you know what i mean: hyper-feminine.) during this time, i was already struggling with ED, and had already been open about my sexuality and interest in masculine gender expression. i don't know what aspect pushed me to reject my former identity and sexuality explorations—the ED? the BDD? gender dysphoria?—i have no idea.

regardless, even when i was hyper-feminine, i still wanted to have small boobs. every time i would go to VS, i would think the A bras were so much better looking than the larger cups. was it because they were smaller and brought up the association of small = skinny? was it because of my previous insecurities with stretch marks and chest shape? did i think being thinner would change the shape of my breasts? was it gender expression issues bleeding through the hyper-femme appearance? do cis gender people even think about their own boobs this much!?

i don't know!

so fast forward to now, the color of the stretch marks have long since faded (they faded around age 15), similar to an old scar. and, i don't know if it's age+gravity, the weight loss, the muscle loss, or the years of binding, but the fat of my breasts sits a lot lower now, which, weirdly, made them..."perky". like there's way more fat that rests beneath the nipple area, which pushes them upward. you can even see the progression of my breasts sitting lower on my body in where my stretch marks are now. my stretch marks used to only be on the swell of the breast itself, now the tops of them rest on the flat of my chest bone.

now that's all wildly funny, because when i was younger and ashamed of my non-perky chest, i would google how to get a more perky shape. and i remember reading "always wear a bra! if gravity pulls your breasts down over time it will get worse!" and like, mate...lol. the opposite is true, at least for me. but i took that shit to heart as a teenager. i slept in my underwire pushup bras. they did not leave my body except to shower.

but! i am still very unhappy and ashamed. because while this shift in my body did give me a more "perky" shape, the old stretch marks also...wrinkle...when i bend over. like a damn plastic bag. and that definitely was not an issue before.

i've fantasized about many different types of chest reconstruction surgeries throughout my life: breast reduction, breast implants, chest reconstruction (feminine and masculine). and i just think...i'll never be happy. let's say i got reconstructive skin grafts and replaced all my stretch mark skin, i would still have scars of that surgery. there's just no escaping the fact that i will have scars no matter what.

i suppose i can only accept what it is. not be happy with it. but accept it.

so yeah, there's my lifelong chest insecurity story.

(also, now that my chest is smaller, i wish i had a chest that looked more like tana or brooke. lol. i guess it's true: what you don't have is always better. ((but seriously, how do fit/thin people with larger chests like brooke exist? my boobs were the first to go when i lost weight.)))

[kinetic-elaboration]

April 6: Production Studio

This was a tough day physically and I am really feeling it. To the point where I'm a little worried, actually?

I went to the Production Studio at the main campus library with one of my co-workers and met my student there so we could practice using the equipment in a low-stakes environment before the next oral history. This was my idea, and I do think it was a good one and I'm glad we did it but at what cost...

My co-worker isn't involved in the project generally. She was there to be our guinea pig subject. I won't lie, I was really assuming she would drive us over but she wanted to walk because she didn't want to pay for parking. Which, I mean, that's fair; finding a spot is also a pain right now because of the construction. It's about a 20 minute walk, which is one of those distances that's like... just long enough to take a big chunk of time round-trip and to be obnoxious in bad conditions but short enough where you feel like, well, it's not that far, it's not that a big deal, might as well do it...

It was 80 degrees today though and we were walking so fast. Even on the way back. Why so fast? Am I a slow walker? Was it actually a normal pace and I'm just weak? I don't know. I was just trying to catch up tbh. And when we got there, I was like, Thank the Merciful Heavens now we will be cool. LOL. Nope. It was 80 degrees in the production studio. And then we had to walk back. Uggggh.

Anyway, the actual hour in the studio went well, I think. I was essentially 'in charge' of it because, of the two employees, I was the one actually working on the project, and of the two people involved in the project, I was the "supervisor." Lmao. Also it was my idea. But I'm not, like, a forceful leader? Not sufficiently confident? I don't know, I was trying my best. I signed up for this gig to practice and learn and stretch myself so that's what I'm doing. So I tried to sort of direct things and make suggestions and keep on top of shit. I think I did okay, overall. I'd give myself a B at it. We ended up shooting 3 videos, one normal, one with a black outfit on a black background (for added difficulty), and one that was purposefully not-good, so we could test the limits of editing. I feel better about the studio--hardly expert but I have gone from doing this essentially zero times to 4 times and I think it'll be easier with our next interview. And my student thinks she understands the lights, which is great because I do not. I'm trying but I see no differences.

After we got back, I did some work but mostly just... recovered. My feet and legs hurt so bad that I was limping home. I do so much walking that I feel like this is really pathetic of me but ugggggh. I took a nap when I got home, and then I got up to eat dinner. I feel better now that I have eaten but also I am sitting so... I really don't want to go to work tomorrow. I don't mind the being at work since I don't have anything hard on the agenda but I do not want to GO to work. I'm just hoping a shower, some more sleep, and some more time will help.

[entiish]

hi, i'm really confused and hoping you can help me out. i have seen people write "please do not save my gifs to your computer" on their gif-hunts, but that's how i've always done it to add into replies and threads. does this mean they want us to go into html and paste in the link manually? if so, isn't that a complete waste of time, and why?

hi, it's skye. (technically goodmorning for me!) and no worries at all, i'm always down to help... and in this case i think i can alleviate some confusion. i'm from the og day where not saving your gifs and trying to link them into threads would absolutely butcher the post and usually the gif would be force-stretched to a 500px wide one, so for me it's very natural to save and post gifs in that way. first and easiest; i think the reason why this rule is being used is because, if you don't save it to your computer you can't edit/redistribute/steal, or at least it makes it harder to do so. and on your main question, i don't believe that their intention is extra html coding and stuff at all, because from what i believe (and have done myself) you can right click on the gif intended for use and select "open in new tab", copy the url and directly paste it into your post... and, despite its faults tumblr will automatically load it in without warping the aspect ratio, quality, etc.  �� there is probably a quicker way to do it than the way i am, but i’ll have to ask you to hit someone else up with that question because... ur dinosaur does not know i have started doing this when i am using resources that are not my own (read: not saved on my computer) because it saves a loooooot of space on your computer tbh 💁🏽‍♀️😅

[tvckerwash]

the amount of time I spend thinking about pre All Of That pfl is actually comical. Did they forget rvb is the Stand around and talk show. Literally how am I supposed to assume these people were ever friends when they’re all at each others throats all the time

fr!!! they’re friendly enough in s9 (not so much in s10), but definitely not at found family level, honestly even friends feels like a bit of a stretch considering they let the whole live ammo thing happen.

ct in particular as a “b plot” needed more not just for herself but also for charon. rvb is all about “Noooo Theres bad people and good people on every side of war………stop fightingggg” but the most we get outside of the leader for charon as a remotely humanized force is demo and girlie talking shit about ct like 😭😭 this goes for the pirates in chorus too Like ok Now Ur ok with gunning down criminals….. either way like What was she doing. Her ass was Not trusted at all how did she find out about Tex and alpha and everything. They were too busy focusing on golden boy york to care or smth /j 

yeah charon’s forces are mostly there to act as fodder and are never fleshed out beyond that when the story would’ve heavily benefited from it imo. I mean hargrove was introduced as the good guy (relatively speaking), and in spite of being the antagonist “ct” was also shown to be a good guy (relatively). “I’m begging you (the reds + caboose) to please fix your shit and leave because if you learn anything about this operation I’m going to have to kill you” energy.

so while not totally unreasonable, hargrove acthuallyTM being generic evil politician/CEO who runs a generic evil corporation is just. hrnmg. it needed more time to stew and we needed to get to know more about hargrove to get the full picture. the most compelling trait we know of his is that according to the fan guide he hated how unremarkable his early life was, and the amount of potential that one trait has is honestly insane. hargrove could be so much more than the power hungry politician obsessed with project freelancer.

he could be a man who wanted to be someone who did something worth remembering, he could’ve see the director as an aspiration, someone who was everything and had everything he wished he could be. malcolm hargrove was not lucky enough to be born as someone who was meant to be remarkable, he had to fight his way to where he currently stood, but…being remarkable comes at a cost—the loss of ones humanity. no amount of fame, money, or power can fill that void that formed inside him, but hargrove is in too deep to return to being the unremarkable man he once was—so he pushes forward, left with no choice but to crush anyone who gets in his way.

sharkface too, ignoring that he was mostly brought back for hype and all the other problems with his arc (if it can even be called that tbh), getting to know what the people he considered his family were like would’ve given him a more solid footing than he has in canon when it came to his whole thing with carolina. like I don't, never have, and never will give a fuck about sharkface—but I could see myself being at least 0.001% more interested in him as a character if he wasn't a goofy caricature who really doesn't fit into chorus’ writing…style? tone? idk I can't think of the word.

wash and kimball can even still kill him in armonia because the reds and blues aren’t above killing their enemies if they’ve been given no other choice like with wyoming and the meta, and this could set up a focus on the unaddressed distance between carolina and epsilon from wash and the bgc.

ANYWAY

I like to think that price knew what ms HackerWoman was up to but wasn’t able to do anything about it because:

he has no balls and ct is clearly not the kind of person who would be willing to…negotiate with him

the director refused to listen to his concerns (as usual)

per my hc that wash was covering for ct, price had to be careful of how he approached the situation because wash was a high risk variable whose wrath was not something he wanted to be on the receiving end of (hence wash asking if he could pay him a visit in person at the end of s6 and why price only ever communicated with him remotely. bro did NOT want to get jumped lmao). the UNSC was dead to wash, there wouldn't be anything stopping him from joining ct if he felt pfl betrayed him (all she had to do was give him solid evidence)

this also goes for the twins and how people interpret one or the other as more ‘correct’ or whatever Maybe we wouldn���t have this issue if you had them talk like normal people. Do they even have a proper conversation???

omg yes!!! north and south are both flawed individuals and their relationship most likely fell apart because of issues that predated pfl being forced to the forefront to such a degree that they could no longer—and were not willing to—try to understand the other. it was always them against the world, and neither could cope with being turned against each other.

wash as comic relief is definitely A choice. on one hand it highlights his change from pfl to recovery one. on the other hand….on retrospect wouldn’t it be more strategically advantageous to Keep that personality going forwards so the councilor A. Doesn’t see the shift in demeanor towards the project and B. Underestimates him…? u theorize that’s what he’s doing in pfl as well so I don’t really see why he would change so drastically. “Woobified Wet cat” is much less likely to betray than “Serious Seruous Guy”…..but I guess comic wash lead to the creation of agent Georgia so I can’t be mad, legally

this is why I constantly reference the washed hands interview and treat it as gospel lol. its emphasis on his recollection era characterization (+ R1 and s9) reinforces that as his more definitive characterization, as when compared to recovery one/reconstruction wash, s9 wash is more or less exactly the same, with the main difference being that he comes off as more lenient and trusting in pfl—and he has a good reason to be.

the director and counselor chose to put their faith in him when no one else would, so even when he doesn’t like certain things or disagrees with their decisions, he’s going to give them the benefit of the doubt and have faith that there’s a valid reason to do what they’re doing—most of the time, anyway. he’ll stick his neck out if he thinks he can get away with it, but he’d ideally prefer someone else to do it since he’s not stupid enough to believe the trust given to him is unconditional. 

@joltning I present to thee the elaboration requested:

When broken down to the bare essentials Wash and C.T fulfill the same function within the story, and the differences between them as characters mostly results from how the story was executed when it came to them fulfilling that function. 

For example, everybody (myself included) complains about how C.T exists solely as a plot device in the Freelancer Saga, but nobody complains about how Wash also exists solely as a plot device in Recovery One and Recollection. I mean Reconstruction is literally the ‘omg theres a plot!?!?!?!?” season of RvB, and without Wash there is no story. 

The main reason Wash isn’t perceived in the same way as C.T is due to the level of freedom the writers had when it came to telling the story they wanted to tell. The Blood Gulch Chronicles and Out of Mind set the foundations for Recovery One and Recollection, but it was through Wash that the lore of RvB was reconstructed into a cohesive story. The unexplainable was explained, the unelaborated was elaborated upon, and all the wacky hijinks and random bits and bobs of the previous seasons were tied together in a way that answered the question asked in episode one: Why are all of these idiots stuck in a canyon in the middle of nowhere while being separated into color coded teams that are fighting each other?

C.T however did not have the same level of freedom as Wash, and this is because of pfl’s nature as a prequel combined with the pacing of those seasons. We pretty much already knew everything about her that there was to know, so there was no point in hiding anything or taking it slow because of that, hence the painfully obvious foreshadowing. This approach to the Freelancer Sage, and C.T’s story is what leads to her essentially having the same arc as Wash, just reversed—or more accurately described; mirrored, like Chief and Arbiter in Halo 2.

A majority of the reversal and/or mirroring between them manifests in their personalities, which I actually talk about some here, but some examples of the phenomenon in regards to actual plot points are:

They are both introduced as recovery agents (or rather fake C.T, who was the real C.T at the time, was introduced as a recovery agent). Wash is a single agent recovering human technology from dead Freelancers, and he uses explosives to destroy the rest of the equipment to prevent information leaks. C.T is attempting to recover alien technology from a long dead civilization with the help of other aliens, and he uses explosives to make sure anyone who knows of their operation and presents a problem will be destroyed to prevent information leaks. 

We knew exactly who Wash was, who he worked for, and why he was reassembling the blues. We didn’t know who C.T was, who he worked for, and why he was fighting Tucker in the desert. 

Wash was shot in the back and survived, but failed to subdue the enemy. C.T was shot in the chest and died just as they were going to subdue the enemy.

In regards to the real C.T, some examples include:

The Meta was portrayed as the primary conflict for Wash, but in reality he had always been aiming for the destruction of Freelancer. On the flip side, C.T’s fight to take down Freelancer is portrayed as the main conflict, but in reality, while poorly explained, tracking down the alien artifacts seemed to be her real goal (which is not as insane as it sounds when you remember that Charon Industries was more aligned with the UNSC proper than pfl was). 

Wash never hinted towards his plan of taking out the Meta in Recovery One to South, or his plan for destroying Freelancer to the Reds and Blues until he had the perfect opportunity to strike, and by then he had built enough trust that they were willing to help him out despite his secrecy. If they weren’t, well, he knew what to say to change their minds. C.T however wasn’t exactly subtle with her thoughts and feelings, and she didn’t build any trust with the people around her, so when she finally defected—which didn’t take a genius to see coming—no one was willing to listen to her or take her at her word, and there was nothing she could say or do to change their minds except offering concrete evidence. “I’m starting not to trust you.” vs “I can’t trust you.”

This one isn’t a plot point, but I’m going to mention it anyway because I think it’s a nice example of this subtle yet obvious mirroring I’m talking about, and shows what I was trying to replicate in my blurb that spurred me to finally write this analysis:

Counselor: Agent Washington? Agent Washington? Washington: Sorry, what were you saying? Counselor: Were you thinking about Epsilon again, Agent Washington? Washington: No. Counselor: What happened with Epsilon was not your fault, Agent Washington. Washington: I didn't think it was. Counselor: We have safeguards for the unstable emotional patterns of an artificial intelligence. Sometimes these algorithms fail. Washington: Oh. So then it's your fault. Counselor: We prefer to think of it as no one's fault.

Vs:

Washington: It wasn't your fault, Connie. Connie: Easy for you to say. You didn't drop the ball. Washington: The ball got dropped. We were all there, it's everyone's responsibility. Connie: Dammit, why are you doing that? Washington: What am I doing? Connie: Making excuses for me. I'm not making excuses for myself...why are you?

All I've mentioned above is also why C.T’s relationship with the leader and the plot twist that the C.T in the desert wasn’t the real C.T are disliked by so many, as there was nothing to justify the sudden bait and switch like there was at the end of S6. I mean, considering we see both Tex and South use voice mods to sound like men, it reads as though that was supposed to be the case with C.T as well, which makes it feel like it was changed at the last second because everyone saw it coming.

This is an issue because A) There's nothing inherently wrong with being predictable—a good plot twist always has foreshadowing, even if it won’t be registered as foreshadowing until the twist happens in certain cases—and B) The story of the Freelancer Saga as a prequel was confined in a box created by the previous seasons, and all they were doing was connecting the aforementioned events to tie up a few loose ends and properly establish Carolina's driving force in present day S10.

[helloalycia]

my patient’s neighbour [two] // wanda maximoff

summary: as you spend more time with your patient's neighbour, you come to realise that your crush may be getting too much

warning/s: none, just fluff tbh

author's note: i’m so glad you guys enjoyed the first part! here’s the next bit :)

part one | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | masterlist | wattpad

When Sunday rolled around, I did everything in my power to make it the perfect day for Anna. We went out for breakfast at a café around the corner, a stroll around the park, then I made her lunch before she conked out afterwards, napping in her bedroom. I took that as my chance to decorate the living-area with birthday decorations. Nothing too much as I knew she'd kill me if I went overboard, but little things like a banner, some balloons and streamers.

I told Wanda to come at this time, too, and she showed up with a bag of groceries and a pretty smile on her face.

"Here, let me help," I said, already moving to take the bag off her. "How are you?"

"I'm good," she said, closing the door behind her and following me into the kitchen. Her smile widened when she saw the decorations. "Y/N, this is lovely! Anna is going to love it!"

"You think?" I asked, spinning around and doing a once over of the living-area. "It's not too much? I know she'll hate if I do too much."

"It's just the right amount," Wanda reassured, glancing at me. "How has she been today?"

We both began to unpack the groceries as we talked.

"Really good actually," I said with a nod. "I treated her to breakfast at that café she likes. We went to the park, fed the ducks, had a nice stroll. Then I made her some lunch and she's napping which leaves us the perfect time to crack on with dinner."

Wanda chuckled. "Great." She paused, making me look to her to see her smile fading. Nervously, she asked, "Did her granddaughter call?"

I sighed quietly and Wanda seemed to know what that meant without me saying anything further. 

"It's okay, we'll just have to make this the best meal ever," she said, not letting it get to her.

"We will," I agreed, before looking to the food on the table. "So, chef. Where do we start?"

Wanda and I spent the next hour prepping dinner, a beef stew called Solyanka, as it would require two hours to cook on the stove so we were starting early to make sure it would be ready in time.

I was chopping some onions as she prepared the beef, but I couldn't help myself from glancing at her every two seconds, still filled with concern because of her cast and minor injuries.

"You should take a picture, it'll last longer," she said teasingly, making me look up to see her watching me with a stifled smile.

"Sorry," I mumbled, shaking my head and looking back to my chopping board.

"What's wrong?" she asked gently.

I chewed on my lip as I glanced at her wrist again, before meeting her gaze. "How did it happen?"

"I already told you," she reminded me playfully, trying to lighten the mood, but I was still fretful. "It happened on a mission."

"Yeah, but how?" I asked again, hoping she understood what I meant.

She seemed reluctant to share, face scrunching up with thought, before looking down to her own chopping board. I thought she wouldn't tell me, but then she spoke.

"I can't tell you too much," she started, shrugging, "since it was a confidential mission. But basically, I was undercover when my target recognised me and we got into a fight."

Watching her with the utmost attention, I nodded, imagining it in my head.

"It wasn't difficult or anything, but it surprised me, y'know?" She looked to me with a smile, as if trying to make it sound less scarier than it was. "The guy, the target, he managed to get in few good hits. And he sprained my wrist. But it's alright."

I wasn't as amused as she was, wincing at the thought of her being in a fight. "Are you sure you're alright?"

She tilted her head knowingly. "I'm sure, Y/N. It's my job."

Shaking my head, I looked back down to my chopping board and continued chopping the onion. "I don't know how you can do that as a job..."

"Well, it's rewarding," she said like it was obvious. "Why do you spend most of your week caring for the elderly?"

"It's rewarding," I said without hesitation, before realising what she'd done and looking her way.

She was smiling cockily, making me roll my eyes and laugh.

"Okay, I see your point," I gave in. "But still. It's a dangerous job what you do. Just be careful, yeah?"

"Always am," she promised. And I wanted to believe her, but the cast on her wrist said otherwise.

—

"It smells like home, devochki, spasibo (girls, thank you)," Anna said from her place at the table. "Are you sure you don't want me to help?"

"We're sure, Anna," Wanda called back to her. "I'm just putting the food into a serving bowl and Y/N is grabbing some glasses. You sit and wait like the patient woman I know you are."

Anna mumbled something in Russian which I didn't understand, but it seemed to make Wanda chuckle as she rolled her eyes.

It was finally time for dinner and the stew had turned out beautifully, not that I had doubts since Wanda didn't seem like one to kid around with cooking.

As she was readying it for the table, I was setting everything up and all that was left were the glasses. But, of course (and oddly enough, since Anna was shorter than I), they were stored on the top shelf of the kitchen cupboard and just out of my reach.

In hindsight, I probably could have grabbed a stool and stood on it, but I was too lazy, so I went on my tip-toes and stretched with all my might. The tips of my fingers brushed against a glass and I attempted to move it towards me, unable to see if I was actually doing anything since it was too high. After a couple of tries, I managed to bring it forward, but my stupid self flicked it too hard and it came tumbling off the shelf and towards the counter.

I braced myself for the sound of glass smashing, but instead, a wondrous red energy wrapped itself around the glass and kept it suspended mid-fall.

"Very clever," Wanda said sarcastically, appearing directly beside me. Her accent was daringly teasing.

I looked up and saw her smirking at me with amusement, right hand raised and aimed at the glass. Red tendrils of energy glowed around her hand and the glass; I widened my eyes a little, amazed at how easy she made it look. Though I knew she had powers, I'd never actually seen her use them up close and personal. It was stunning.

"I totally knew you were going to do that," I played it cool, cheeks flushing as she set the glass on the counter.

"Mhm, sure you did," she played along with a melodious laugh, before pressing her front to my back without warning and reaching to grab two more glasses. "Here, I got it."

My body tensed at the feeling of her unexpectedly so close to me. My mouth went dry, her warmth emanating from her and washing over me with the scent of her perfume. Did she always smell so good?

When she grabbed all three glasses, she didn't seem to notice the effect she had on me (unless she did and kept quiet for her own amusement).

"Think you can grab the food without dropping it?" she asked, quirking an entertained brow.

Still distracted by her perfume, I nodded and cleared my throat. "Food. Right. Yeah."

As I stirred the stew to mix everything thoroughly, I felt my heart rate return to its normal pace and told myself to chill out. Wanda just happened to be an extremely pretty individual who was kind and thoughtful and funny. It wasn't a big deal.

When I was sure I wouldn't make a fool of myself, I returned to the dining table with a pot of stew and set it down on the placemat.

"Priyatnogo appetita (enjoy your meal)," I said, trying not to stumble over my pronunciation. 

Both Anna and Wanda raised their brows with matching surprised smiles on their faces.

"You said that perfectly, Y/N!" Wanda said encouragingly, as I took a seat to the right of Anna at the head of the table.

"I see you've been practicing," Anna added, looking to me with an endearing gaze. "A present in itself. Thank you, milaya (sweetie)."

I smiled bashfully. "I have to keep up with you both somehow, right?"

Anna chuckled as Wanda gave me a brilliant smile. Something in my chest stirred as she did, and I was forced to look away, though my own smile didn't fade.

"So, Y/N and I put this together for you and I'm sure you'll know what it is," Wanda said, before serving up a bowl for Anna.

"Solyanka," Anna exclaimed with delight. "Devushki (girls), this looks and smells amazing." She paused, glancing between us both with a grateful smile. "Since you've both been here, this place... it's beginning to feel alive again."

To my surprise, she teared up and began to laugh, using her napkin to pat the corner of her eyes. I rested my hand on hers, squeezing it gently and giving her a small smile.

"I appreciate this very much," she continued, before squeezing my hand and letting go to grab her spoon. "I can't wait to try it."

The three of us dug into our stew and Anna loved it, talking about the first time she ever had it as a kid and how it was one of her favourite dishes. The rest of the meal went by wonderfully, with Anna looking as happy as ever and Wanda listening to her intently. I was listening, too, but my gaze did end up wandering to Wanda as she sat there animatedly, nodding along and smiling to Anna.

For some reason, she was ethereal tonight, though she looked like she always did. Her long brown hair was tied up in a ponytail and she wore a loose tee shirt over some jeans. Nothing fancy, but she pulled it off so well. Rings adorned her fingers as she played with them thoughtlessly, and it caught my eye before I got distracted by her cast on her left wrist.

She'd said she was okay, but it still worried me. It wasn't my right to worry, but she was my friend. I was concerned. She could take care of herself, but that wouldn't put the ache in my heart at ease.

As if she could hear my concerns, her eyes flickered to mine, a kaleidoscope of blue, green and gold. She sent me a reassuring glance before looking back to Anna with focus. I chewed on my lower lip, trying not to let my worry get the best of me, before looking back to Anna.

Towards the end of the meal, after we'd eaten and were merely conversing, Anna's landline rang in the apartment.

"I'll get it," Wanda said, already standing up to grab the phone from its cradle.

Anna and I watched as she answered the phone with a friendly 'hello', before a surprised expression appeared on her face.

"Sure, I'll pass it on now," Wanda was saying before approaching the table and stopping by Anna. Her expression softened as she said to Anna, "It's Sasha."

Anna's expression fell at the mention of her granddaughter. She nodded slightly, before standing up and grabbing her cane to balance. Accepting the phone, she began to walk away into her bedroom. Wanda and I heard her say a faint 'hello' before she closed the door behind her.

"Her granddaughter rang?" I asked with mild disbelief.

"It is her birthday," Wanda pointed out, returning to her seat.

"Bit late into the day though, isn't it?" I retorted, pulling a face. "Almost like the day is over, in fact."

"Sounding a little judgemental there, Y/N," Wanda teased, leaning forward into the palm of her hands and watching me.

"I'm not," I said with an eye roll. "I just think she should show her grandmother some respect. Who does she think she is?"

I paused as Wanda gave me a knowing look, then winced.

"Okay, I heard it that time," I admitted, making her laugh.

"I get it," she said, nodding slightly. "Maybe she's finally starting to realise though."

I sighed, leaning back in my seat. "I guess... For Anna's sake, I hope so."

Wanda and I talked amongst ourselves until Anna returned silently, hushing our conversation. She returned the phone to its cradle before taking a seat at the head of the table. Wanda and I exchanged looks before I decided to speak, noticing Anna wouldn't.

"Is Sasha doing okay?" I asked gently.

Anna was staring ahead, barely listening, before she glanced at me then looked down to her empty bowl. Sentences left her lips in Russian, mumbled and incoherent, at least to me. Wanda leaned forward, holding her hand and frowning with sympathy as she listened to her words. I felt horrible, sensing something was wrong, but unable to do anything to help.

"I'm sorry, Anna, I didn't mean to upset you," I said, shaking my head.

Wanda met my gaze. "It's not your fault... Anna just misses Sasha."

I frowned. "Oh."

"But I'm glad I have you both," Anna finally spoke, accent thick with emotion, as she looked between us before settling her eyes to me. "Even if you're paid to be here."

She cracked a smile, making my shoulders relax. I returned her expression, glad she still had a sense of humour.

Anna didn't mention Sasha's name for the rest of the evening. We cleaned up, had some tea, played a quick board game before I made sure she was okay for the night.

"She alright?" Wanda asked when I closed Anna's bedroom door and stepped into the hall.

"Yeah, she's tired from all of today's excitement," I said with a smile.

"So are you by the sounds of it," she joked, but stepped forward to rest a hand on my arm. "I think we should call it a night."

"I think we should," I said in agreement.

After grabbing my stuff, Wanda and I left the flat before walking to her apartment and stopping outside.

"Thanks for helping me out today," I told her with a tired smile. "I really appreciated it."

"Well, you asked so nicely... how could I resist?" she said, staring up at me through her eyelashes. I rolled my eyes playfully, making her smile. "I had fun. Thanks for inviting me."

I was going to respond, but a yawn escaped my lips, prompting me to cover my mouth as I did.

"Sorry," I said, trying to blink the fatigue away momentarily.

She chuckled, tilting her head and watching me carefully. "You're cute."

I breathed out through my nose, unsure what to say to her words, but I definitely felt my heart rate speed up a little.

"I'll let you go," she said, clearly entertained by my silence. "Get home safe, yeah?"

"And you look after yourself when saving the world, yeah?" I replied with a quirked brow, eyes glancing at her wrist.

"I promise." She grinned before moving forward to hug me.

I returned the hug, the smell of her perfume permanent in my nose by now, before pulling away with a final smile. Of course, I probably shouldn't have stared at her lips so intensely, wanting nothing more than to kiss them.

"See you tomorrow," I said, snapping back into reality and taking a step back. "Goodnight, Wanda."

"Goodnight," she said sweetly.

I turned to leave and was suddenly wide awake. Did I just think about kissing Wanda?

—

It was a few visits later when I was caring for Anna and she decided to have a dance around the living room. One minute we were flicking through different radio stations, and the next she was putting on some old records on her record player. She settled on an upbeat, 50s dance song, the music filling the apartment with joy.

"Egor and I danced to this very song when we first met," she told me, talking about her late husband with a twinkling passion in her eyes. "It was a party and he had been staring at me all night, and I him. Then finally, when this song came on, he approached me and said, 'dorogaya, okazyvayesh' mne chest' tantsevat' so mnoy?'"

I suppressed a smile as I watched her reminisce. "And that means...?"

"'Darling, would you do me the honour of dancing with me'?" she repeated in English for my benefit.

My heart melted. "Anna, that's adorable. He sounds like such a gentlemen."

"He was," she said with a sigh of agreement, smiling to herself.

Whenever she talked about her husband, I'd never seen her look more content. The mere mention of his name was enough to put a smile on her face. I could only hope to have a love like theirs some day.

I stepped forward, putting out my hand. "I'm no Egor, but I'd love to dance with you if you'd let me."

"Oh, I can't do that," she said, waving my hand away. "I can barely walk, milaya (sweetie)."

"Hey, as your carer, I am insisting that you dance with me," I said, feigning sternness.

She hesitated, before resting her hand in mine and smiling with gratitude. The two of us danced together, myself being careful to keep her upright and make sure she didn't overexert herself. She was smiling and laughing as I spun her around, dancing her all around the living room, and it warmed my heart to see her so cheery.

A knock on the door caused me to excuse myself from Anna, only to find Wanda on the other end.

"Someone's in a good mood," she said instantly, taking note of my smile.

I stepped to the side to let her in. "Yeah, well, Anna is doing good today. It's contagious, what can I say?"

Before Wanda could respond, Anna called from the living-area with excitement.

"Wanda, idi syuda i potantsuy so mnoy!" she exclaimed, already grabbing Wanda's hand and pulling her in.

It didn't take a genius to know that Anna had basically asked Wanda to dance with her. I chuckled as I followed after them, enjoying the sight of Anna and Wanda dancing together.

"What's the occasion?" Wanda asked, glancing over the short woman and to me with a helpless smile.

"No occasion," I quipped, crossing my arms and trying to hold in my laughter at Anna's speed and perseverance with a reluctant Wanda. "Just having a good time."

Wanda looked like she wanted to retort with a comment, but Anna spun her around before she could, making me laugh aloud.

"Prikhodi odin, milaya (come on, sweetie)!" Anna said, holding out a hand. "Dance!"

Unable to resist, I joined in with the two Sokovian women, appreciating how happy Anna looked and how awkward Wanda felt in the situation. She wasn't much of a dancer, but she was trying and God was that adorable.

We danced for a little while longer until Anna's back began to hurt and she took a seat. Though, she insisted that Wanda and I resume with our dancing.

Just on time, like a sign from the universe or a higher being or whatever you wanted to believe in, a slow song came on next, filling the apartment soothingly.

To my surprise, the awkward dancer that was Wanda was oddly confident as she held out her hand to me.

"Would you do me the honour of dancing with me?" she asked softly, a small smile playing on her lips.

At the familiarity of her words, I glanced to Anna, who seemed to pick up on it, too. She said nothing as she watched us with a smile of her own.

"I'd love to," I said, looking back to Wanda's eyes.

They looked blue in the light, a beautiful sky blue that put me at ease as soon as I stared into them. I slipped my hand into hers, letting her pull us closer together as she rested her other hand on my waist, the touch sending shivers up my spine. I put mine on her shoulder, allowing her to take the lead.

It was the most intimate we'd been, and as she maintained eye contact, I wondered if she could feel my hands trembling slightly, or my heart hammering loudly, or my palms turning a little sweaty. She made me nervous in the best way possible, her smile dazzling without realising and her eyes piercing without meaning to be.

She must have felt it, too, that tug in the pit of her stomach that I was feeling now. Otherwise there was something seriously wrong and I was already too deep into a crush on my patient's neighbour.

When the song ended, it feeling like mere seconds in total, she let go of me and I missed the contact and the smell of her perfume and the way she was looking at me.

"Couldn't have done it better myself," Anna spoke, forcing me to tear my gaze from Wanda's lips. She smiled at me knowingly. "You ladies definitely know how to dance."

I felt a heat creeping up my neck as I smiled to myself, distracting myself with the laces on my shoes. When I finally brought myself to look up, I saw Wanda already looking my way, a calm expression on her face.

As she did most times she visited, Wanda stayed with me and Anna until I tucked Anna into bed and bid her a goodnight. We left the apartment and Wanda decided to walk me to the lift that evening, a distracted look on her face.

It was silent between us, a comfortable one, until the doors slid open and I looked to her with kind eyes.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow," I told her, making her look to me. "Have a nice evening, Wanda."

She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. I watched with amusement, wondering what was going on in that pretty head of hers. The lift doors began to shut, so I put my foot between them to keep them open.

"I should go," I said with an awkward laugh, before grabbing her hand and squeezing it gently since she wouldn't speak. "Goodnight."

When I turned to leave, I got, maybe, a step into the lift before I felt her fingers wrap around my wrist and tug me backwards, spinning me around. I didn't get chance to ask what was up as she stepped forward, pressing her lips to mine in an instant.

Startled, I froze at the contact, but then her hand rested on the back of my neck as her thumb caressed my jaw, and I found myself melting into her, closing my eyes at the blissful feeling.

Her other hand fell to my waist as she deepened the kiss, sending me into the lift and the wall hitting my back. I moved my lips in time with hers, revelling at how soft and delicate and gentle she was being. Kissing Wanda Maximoff wasn't something I had realised would be this good, but now that I was, I never wanted to stop.

Unfortunately, the sound of the lift doors shutting pulled us apart. I was breathless, my heart racing and my lips swollen from her spectacular kiss.

"I've wanted to do that for such a long time," she revealed, stepping back a little. Her eyes were bright and her cheeks were flushed as she watched me with mild concern. "I completely should have asked though. I'm sorry that I overstepped."

She pursed her lips, forefinger and thumb pinching her bottom lip regretfully and gaze falling to the floor.

"You didn't overstep," I said, already missing the sensation of her lips against mine. "You stepped just the right amount."

She looked back up, eyes softening as her lips curved into a radiant smile.

"You wanna, maybe, do that again?" I asked without thinking, my mind a haze as Wanda still remained so close to me.

She laughed melodiously before raising her hand and cupping my cheek. Her eyes looked between mine before falling to my lips affectionately.

"I'd love to, dorogoy (darling)."

I smiled toothlessly before closing the gap between us, secretly wishing this lift ride would go on forever if it meant I could kiss Wanda like this.

—

After making out with Wanda in the lift, she asked me out on a date and it was the best date I'd ever been on. Nothing over the top but very thoughtful as she took me for a picnic in the park before getting ice cream for dessert.

We went on a few more dates after that, taking turns to take the lead with them, and she ended up asking me to be her girlfriend which of course I said yes to.

All whilst this was going on, I still cared for Anna and Wanda paid her visits when she could, though we tried to remain as normal as possible. We didn't think it was best to tell Anna that we were together since we didn't want to startle her or make her feel uncomfortable in our presence. Of course, keeping a secret from Anna is as good as nothing when she had eyes like a hawk.

Wanda and I were putting a plate of tea and biscuits together for Anna one day, myself lining up the biscuits neatly as Wanda lingered beside me. She was about to grab a biscuit from the plate when I smacked her hand away.

"Just one," she pleaded, but I shook my head before nodding to the packet on the side.

"Help yourself to those," I told her condescendingly. "These are for Anna."

"Just get her another," she said simply, before reaching over again.

I smacked her hand away again, giving her a knowing look.

"Y/N!"

"Wanda!" I mirrored her childish smile.

She narrowed her eyes petulantly. "Are you seriously doing this right now?"

"Are you?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

She pouted and I so badly wanted to lean forward and kiss it away, but Anna was sat on her recliner behind us. Wanda seemed to know this as a mischievous smile fell on her lips, eyes watching me carefully.

"You're not cute," I mumbled, before grabbing the tray and turning to leave. As I was walking to Anna, a biscuit began to float off the plate, red wisps of energy wrapped around it and bringing it to– "Wanda!"

She laughed, eyes glowing red with magic, before grabbing the biscuit from mid-air and taking a bite.

"Such a child," I said under my breath before setting the tray on the coffee table before Anna. Smiling at her, I said, "Here you go, Anna. Do you want anything else?"

As I straightened up, flipping Wanda off behind my back and encouraging her laughter further, I noticed the way Anna looked between us both curiously.

"Everything okay?" I asked, eyebrows knitting together as she continued to study us both.

"Something happened," she decided. "Between you both."

"What do you mean?" I asked, taking a seat on the couch. "Nothing happened."

"Something definitely did," she said knowingly. "I may be old, milaya (sweetie), but I have very good eyes."

"Anna, what are you talking about?" Wanda played dumb, taking a seat beside me, biscuit in hand.

"Don't think I haven't seen the way you two steal glances when you think I'm not looking," she said, pointing between us. "Or the way you," her finger settled on Wanda, "have been helping Y/N out more often than usual."

Wanda and I flushed, embarrassed that we'd been caught out. I was so certain that we'd successfully hid it from her, but clearly we were mistaken.

"We wanted to tell you," Wanda began, cheeks still pink as she leaned forward.

Anna silenced her with a wave of her hand. "Save it. I knew I was right. You two are together."

Pursing my lips, I waited for her to say something because I wasn't really sure what to say myself. Suddenly, a smile appeared on her lips.

"I'm very happy for you both," she said to us. "Wanda here always needed somebody in her life who wasn't me. And you, Y/N, are the perfect match for her."

I chuckled, looking to the girl in question, whose face was as red as her powers that she used to torment me with. I grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently, and nudged her in the shoulder.

"You hear that? Perfect match," I teased, making her roll her eyes to distract from her flustered self.

Anna said something to her in Russian, way too fast and incomprehensible for me to understand, even with the extra effort I was making to learn it. Whatever it was, it made Wanda get even more embarrassed, her green eyes darting around the room in an effort to overcome it.

"What did you say?" I asked Anna with amusement.

"Oh, nothing Wanda hasn't heard before," she said dismissively. "It's all okay. Isn't it, Wanda?"

"Yeah," Wanda mumbled.

"I don't know what's happening here, but I'm all for someone putting Wanda in her place," I said, looking between them both with an entertained smile.

Anna chuckled as Wanda shoved me in the arm gently before pulling me close again. I smiled at how cute she looked, pink blush creeping up her neck and teeth chewing on her lower lip to contain her smile.

I'd never get sick of the sight.

[brw]

wait i saw you already answered a scarletvision one so im gonna change my ask to doomreed

Gives nose/forehead kisses

at first reed exclusively he's gonna stretch his gross dinosaur neck over to give a Smooch HOWEVER once victor gets used to Affection™ he will Go In For It.

Gets jealous the most

easily victor reed is too dense to notice someone flirting w/ his lover and victor is mentally ill <3

Picks the other up from the bar when they're too drunk to drive

victor would not risk vulnerability by getting drunk and its a semi popular fanon thing that reed is a lightweight so. victor <3

Takes care of on sick days

both of them but especially reed victor trusts like two people maximum to help him when he gets sick and that's boris and reed. reed absolutely loves the chance to get wet cloths and hot water bottles out.

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

honestlyyy it might be victor?? like i feel like getting him out of his armour into beach wear is an incredible enough feat in its own right that reed is happy to leave it at that but victor's like if i've debased myself into wearing a speedo i might as well do it right. to the water we go.

Gives unprompted massages

both of them ; that armour is fucking HEAVYYYYY and victor's shoulders are VERY fucked he needs the relief and i think victor enjoys reed turning into a Literal Puddle that he'll just do it whenever.

Drives/rides shotgun

victor had a chauffeur he refuses for him or reed to drive ^_^

Brings the other lunch at work

reed probably brings snacks when victor is committing Science Crimes and vise versa but in all honesty i don't think either of them can cook. they probably both ask boris to bring the other a proper meal at different times it fhat counts??

Has the better parental relationship

despite his parents being long dead victor. nathaniel richards is just an absolutely awful father reed's relationship with him is. Poor. tbh his mother seemed nice & good enough but she died when he was fuckin 7 so her influence on his life. remains to be seen.

Tries to start role-playing in bed

neither of them but if it would be anyone it would be victor. reed is asexual and i have decided sex neutral he does not care if it happens or not he has no Strong Opinions it is a thing that happens and if victor has any thoughts on How it should Happen that's up to victor. the idea of victor wanting to try some kinky rp is. really funny tbh.

Embarrassingly drunk dancer

reed just sort of melts while drunk so it's gonna have to be victor. provided he doesn't start crying first.

Still cries watching Titanic

honestly victor he'd do it silently with his mask on so reed doesn't know.... reed does not cry during movies. he finds most of them kind of stupid.

Firmly believes in couple costumes

i don't think either of them in all honesty neither of them are the type to dress up in costumes either way? i think both of them would need to be forced into it by somebody jdjsdd.

Breaks the expensive gift rule

victor more than reed but both of them, reed i think tends to make things as gifts when they do them to make sure they're really meaningful, victor meanwhile is like i searched the world and murdered 10 people and staged a heist to get the original of this da vinci portrait you said you liked once or some shit ajdnjdndnf

Makes the other eat breakfast

victor. he's like do you have any idea how hard it is to import maple syrup when ur running a dictatorship. eat the goddamned pancakes richards.

Remembers anniversaries

despite all fans try to tell me otherwise i do think reed remembers more dates than they give him credit for... and i can see victor straight up not registering that anniversaries are a thing you're supposed to celebrate. tbh i don't see either of them making that big a deal of it bc both of them are mostly Ambivalent but i'm gonna say reed over victor.

Brings up having kids

reed i imagine! i mean he has two of them and victor is Absolutely Terrified of messing up with his new 20 y/o daughter so i think reed would have to bc he's a lot more comfortable with the subject.

send a ship and i'll tell you who...

[digi-tama-in-your-pocket]

Happy New Year everyone

I actually never really left the Digimon fandom but I go pretty dormant in it pretty frequently. I don't want to let that happen again. At least not to the degree that I have in the past, everyone does need a break and to enjoy other things, y'know?

I haven't had a real v-pet since I was a child excluding the now defunct Digimon Unlimited fan game and Tamagotchi LIFE for mobile phones, technically got back into the V-pet hobby in 2020 but it was at the tail end, like late november, when a deal on yellow DM20th appeared on my twitter feed, and I hadn't been aware they existed. I certainly didn't know it was all 5 OG eggs rolled up into one device when I bought it. I was so happy to know it was more than I expected it to be. But I still count 2021 as the year I really got back into the v-pet hobby.

2020 I had one DM20, one DMX3, and a gen1 Tamagotch..

But in 2021 I added to my collection, five more DM20ths, two more DMXes with two more preordered, two Pen 20ths, two more OG Tamagotchis, a Gigapets AR T-Rex, a Digivice ver. Complete, all six Pen Zs, the Digimon Vital Bracelet and several Dim Cards, a Pocket Pikachu Color, a Dinkie Dino, a Tamagotchi Nano ( Hello Kitty edition ), a Giga Pets Pixie, a Tamagotchi ON, and in the mail I have a Tamagotchi Angel, several more DIM cards, a Dragon Quest pedometer pet, and an OG Giga Pet Digital Doggy. .....( and if you really wanna stretch the definition of virutal pets I got the Monster Rancher DX port and have been playing Sonic Adventure 2 again, also an LCD screen pokeball game which is v-pet adjacent )

( pets not pictured are stored inside this box with lovely stickers )

coincidentally, I either need to take a serious chill pill on my spending, or start making more money on my commissions. But either way, 2021 was definitely the year of virtual pets for me and I'm hoping I find some more new goodies in 2022.

Plans going into 2022 is to keep drawing my virtual pets as I raise them. And start cycling my virtual pets a little more often. I set a maximum number of devices ( and i'm kinda sorta breaking that limit but I don't count the vital bracelet or digivice tbh ) and I told myself I would allow myself to raise at least two eggs before forcing myself to swap. But I think my new rule going forward will be to swap out my pets at the start of every month.

The only ones exempt from this will be my Vital Bracelet since it's the newest one and is encouraging me to exercise, and my DM20ths since it's my favorite device and I just always want to have one running at all time, with my green one being my "primary" device.

I'm going to turn a blind eye to my Tamagotchi and DM20th for the rest of the night. Hate doing it, but it's time. I just want new eggs on my DM20th, but I'm gonna swap out the Tamagotchi for a Tamagotchi ON. My first ever modern Tamagotchi. My rechargable AAA batteries came in the mail today so i'm fully equipped.

The DMX will be given an extension. Once it evolves to it's final stage, i'll put it in backup, and run a different device. I'm thinking a pendulum this time. Or maybe a non-digimon device. Dinkie Dino is calling me. Maybe i'll do a poll....

And by pure conidience, i'll be putting my current vital bracelet digimon in storage... has nothing to do with the end of the month/year. I just always intended to store him once he became ultimate, and he just turned into an ultimate as I typed this post:

( Pro Tip: It's smart to have digimon from each evolution stage in storage on your app so you can do more battles without eating your tickets. Maximize your rewards. Besides I like seeing more than just Mega Digimon. )

Anyway, once again, Happy New Year guys. Let me know if you got any digimon or virtual pet related resolutions hm?

[irwinscuddlebuddy]

🎀💗🎀💗

Yall I wish I carried on with Ballet when I was little, I'm trying to get back into it but I feel like I'm too late to do it bc I can't bend or hold my legs like they do. I ordered pointe shoes but I've had to send them back twice bc they don't fit and there aren't any dance shops near me to help with getting the right size. If I do ballet it'll keep me preoccupied from eating as well, that might be one of the reasons I want to get back into it idk but I just want to do it more often.