#i was also just going to use his class artwork at first but then i thought it'd be way funnier to use comically stretched demon crying face

[squiddy-god]

your ratio fics have been engraved into my mind...

may i request for dr. ratio and a cheeky professor! male reader? kind of friendly rivals to lovers...?

Hehehehehe i adore this request because i literally love this dynamic with ratio, like just his rivalry to lovers with a fellow professor is *chef kiss* i decided to make the reader an art professor because i feel like that is the dynamic i like the most with ratio. ive been getting alot of male reader request and i absolutly love it. ♥︎request open♥︎ Cw : fluffy, no tw, male!reader, art professor! Reader, “rivals” to lovers, 

The halls of the intelligentsia guild are writhe with the hustle and bustle of students, characteristic uniforms adorning each of them as they carry books and make small conversation before hurrying to a lecture. It was in one such hall that the class of veritas ratio took place, the many subjects that he resides over had landed him in the aptly nicknamed “miscellaneous” hallway as having him move to a different class for every lecture would be “idiotic” and “most tiresome a pursuit that could be avoided by simply providing a class in the miscellaneous hall-” as he put it.

What he did not count on was his new found “rivalry” with the art teacher across the hall. Your first meeting was brought on by several students complaining rather loudly in the halls as ratio walked to his class after his lunch, the subject of their ire none other than you- or rather their failing grade in what they described as “the easiest class to pass” and how they couldn't believe that they were failing your class. During that time he simply waved it off as something that doesn't concern him, after all he had never met you. The second time he heard about you before meeting you was also on a rather sour note, several students beginning to slack off in his class in favor of drawing and working on their respective projects for your class. This incident lead both to their scolding and the scathing email that he sends you, speaking of how clearly your habits as a teacher must me idiodic if your students feel the need to slack off. 

He receives back an email by the end of the day, full of sarcasm and the cheeky quip about how “perhaps someone should check over his prior research as, clearly, he is someone who makes uninformed decision on faulty circumstantial data before seeing it for yourself” and that has him fuming in his empty class. The next day however he is met after classes by the same group who Promptly apologize. 

“Uhm… Dr. Ratio? We'd like to apologize- we shouldn't have slacked off in your class” 

“Yeah Dr. (L/n) made us complete the assignment during his class so we submitted those too-”

“And he wanted us to give you this” one of them hands him a printed flier and he feels his face contort in shock at the apology. Taking the flier into his hands he dismisses the students with a warning to not make the same foolish mistakes twice, the flier says that there is going to be a student art exhibition in a few days.

“Hmmm, how quaint…” he mutters to himself but still takes mental note of the date and time. 

It is all of these things that lead him to his first official meeting with you, still in his characteristic plaster mask he makes his way down the familiar halls where he finds the art exhibition set up in one of the librarys, paintings, sculptures, digital art displayed on screens, and in the middle of the exhibition greeting the guests and pointing out remarkable students is you. You stand in a suit, clothing colorful and an artwork in itself, hands clasped in front of you and a polite smile on your features. The person you currently talk to walks off to enjoy the art and you seem to recognize the good Dr immediately. “Ah! Dr ratio I see you have decided to grace our little exhibition?” you smile as you walk up to him, taking in the plaster head that concealed any expression. “I see the rumors are true, tell me did you make this delightful mask yourself?” your eyes are analytical as you seem to scrutinize every detail of his plaster face, the curve of his roman nose, the gentle curvature of his eyes, the line of his sharp jaw, all of it falls under your watchful gaze and for once ratio feels himself grow slightly nervous. 

This is his first official meeting with you, and he realizes that you are not in fact the idiot or fool he initially assumed, but rather a man with a deep passion for art who much like him doesn't tolerate fools who willingly live in ignorance, and thus your “rivalry” with the good doctor is born. Both artistically and academically he competes with you, as much in the same way that patience breeds success, passion begets passion. 

His hand holds two bags as he walks across the empty call to your class, the afternoon sun that filters through tall windows gives his skin a warm glow as he enters your class finding you at your desk grading with nary a lunch break in sight. Ratio tsks shaking his head, he's no longer dawning his plaster mask, instead letting you see his vague annoyance as he sets one of the bags in front of you, the smell of your favorite food wafting up to your nose. “Oh my savior- to what do I owe the pleasure of being graced by the presence of the esteemed dr. ratio” he rolls his eyes as pulls up a chair. “I do not wish to see you work yourself into the ground” it was a half true statement, truly he didn't want to see you burn out, however what he's concealing is that deep in his chest is a nagging feeling to simply spend time with you, bask in your presence and soak in your company. Your voice seems to sooth the annoyance that seems constantly brewing inside him, smoothing over the creese in his brow as you poke and prod at him with your words, it was an odd feeling to be so indebted to such a fool. He ultimately surmised that while you were a fool you were also far from an idiot and even further from those moronic individuals that invoke his ire by squandering the opportunity of knowledge and basking in ignorance. 

You wipe a pretend tear from your eye as you rifle through the bag. “I didn't know you cared so much doctor” your voice is playful and it causes ratio’s eye to twitch. “Do not be foolish, i simply do not wish to lose the one person in this place that isn't a complete idiot” his voice is so matter of fact that it has your eyes widening at the rare concealed complement. “Oh ratio i didn't know you were in love~” the emphasis on love is followed shortly by a snicker. “So when is the wedding?” If you were to look up at this moment you would be rewarded by the blush that spreads across his skin to the tips of his ears and down his neck to his broad shoulders. For a man who claims to keep his words few and his thoughts deep he speaks often, and yet now he is truly rendered speechless by your cheeky remarks. “Nonesens, are you perhaps blinded to my affection for you?” he tsks again as if the very notion is the definition of ridiculous. “Perhaps my dear professor, you'd care to join me for a date one evening” the for you'd taken up to eat the lunch he had brought you is held precariously between your fingers, one move away from falling, and your mouth is agape in shock as you stare at his burgundy eyes.

 “I…I would be delighted to, veritas.”

[tastycitrus]

black mage/adversary is a thing (mostly with RED Warrior) so i thought i'd make a chart sorting how the various iterations of the adversary would feel about it

no, i don't know why i spent my time on this

[blueraineshadows]

A Kiss Between Friends

Sebastian Sallow x You ♥️

A one shot fic based on this artwork here by @rhewart As soon as I saw it, I was inspired ✨️

4.5k words. Tags: first kiss / teen romance / fluff / friends to sweethearts

“Are you going to ask Violet to Hogsmeade this weekend?” You asked, looking up from the book that lay open before you on your spread out robe. 

The sun was warm on your head, and Sebastian had to shield his eyes against the rays as he turned his head to look towards you from where he lay on his back, his own robe shrugged off and spread out beneath him on the grass. His face was a riot of freckles from the early summer sun, and his unruly hair was beginning to show hints of coppery gold through the brunette. His brow furrowed slightly as he glanced your way, his fingers pinching at his lower lip as he considered your question.

“And, why would I do that?” He asked.

“Because you fancy her,” you smirked, one hand propping up your chin whilst the other flipped the page in your book.

“I do not,” he scowled, a pink blush spreading across his cheeks as he feigned interest in a blade of grass he had plucked, twisting it between his fingers. “Whatever gave you that idea?”

“You stare at her in class, and at the dinner table. I’ve seen you,” you said, your smirk widening into a grin. “You should ask her to Hogsmeade. You might even get a snog.”

Sebastian blew air through his lips in a huff of amusement. “I do not stare at her, and how would you know?” His eyes swung back to her, narrowing slyly. “Does that mean you have been staring at me?”

You felt your own cheeks flood with colour. “Absolutely not. There are far more attractive boys to drool over than you, Sallow.”

He slapped a hand to his chest dramatically and groaned. “Oh, you wound me, sweetheart. Such cruelty from your lips. Who do you drool over, then? Please, don’t tell me it’s Weasley or Prewett. I’m surprised I managed to lure you away from them this afternoon as it is, I shall go mad if you start snogging one of them.”

Your laughter spilled from your lips as you sat up straighter, reaching across to shove your Slytherin friend on his shoulder. “You’re not jealous are you? At least one of us would be getting some action if I managed to get a snog with one of them. I feel like I am the last girl in my dorm to even hold hands with a boy, let alone kiss one.”

Sebastian rolled onto his side, his lips twisted into a smirk as he caught your hand in his, his long fingers grazing gently along your palm as he grasped you more firmly. “I’ll hold your hand. I can’t have you feeling left out.”

Looking down at your joined hands, you uttered a little sigh, appreciating his efforts to be playful with you. The banter was not unusual between you both, you had been best friends for quite a while now, shared many adventures and secrets. Whilst chatting with the girls after lights out in the dorms was always fun, especially when it came to snogging, you appreciated the fact that you could also talk to Sebastian about such things. You knew he would never judge you, and he always had your back.

“Maybe I do feel left out,” you said quietly, your gaze dipping shyly. “I really am the last girl to kiss anyone in my dorm. Sometimes, I wonder if there is something odd about me.”

Sebastian immediately sat up. “There is nothing wrong with you at all. Just because you are waiting for someone worth kissing, it doesn’t mean you are odd. I think it’s actually quite lovely. I mean, I’ve never kissed anyone either.”

Your lips parted in surprise, your eyes meeting with his. “Really?”

His lopsided smile was unbelievably adorable, his blush spreading quickly as he shrugged his shoulders. He let go of your hand and brushed strands of hair from his forehead. “I’ve just never really had the opportunity to, I suppose.”

“If you ask Violet to Hogsmeade you will,” you suggested brightly.

Sebastian pulled his knees up, wrapping his arms about his legs as he frowned. “I hear you, however, I’m not sure it’s such a good idea. Violet has definitely kissed someone before, and I would rather not make an idiot of myself.”

You raised an eyebrow as you looked at him. “Sebastian Sallow, top duellist and currently top of the 7th year academic table, is scared of kissing a girl. What would your fan club say?”

“Oh, shut up,” he muttered, shaking his head. He poked his tongue out at you before throwing his blade of grass into your lap. “You are supposed to be a brave Gryffindor, and yet you haven’t dared to kiss anyone either. I guess that makes us both scaredy cats.”

“We could always practise on each other,” you joked, hoping to take the frown off his face. It worked. He turned stunned eyes your way, his mouth agape.

“What?”

For some reason your pulse fluttered, heat flooding your cheeks at the stupid suggestion. “I…I was joking, of course. Don’t look so horrified.”

His face deepened into thought as he sat up straighter, his fingers pinching at his lower lip again. “Hang on, though. You might be onto something there,” he said slowly.

His eyes met yours, the depths gleaming with the excitement of an idea. You knew that look and swallowed hard. “If we kiss, it would break that pressure of the first time for both of us. A little bit of practice between two friends who trust each other, without all the expectation that comes along with impressing someone. It’s perfect!”

“Merlin…you’re seriously considering it!” You gasped.

“Think of it as unsanctioned research,” he smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

You stared at him, stunned, your eyes drifting down to gaze upon the shape of his mouth, and you actually began to wonder what it would feel like to press your own lips against the pink softness. Heat flooded your cheeks and you pressed your hands to them. “Wouldn’t…wouldn’t it be weird? I mean, we’re friends…”

“I guess there is only one way to find out.”

“Now?” You gasped, glancing hurriedly around you to see if anyone was nearby. There wasn’t. The pair of you had chosen a well secluded spot to sit and read during a free afternoon. The only sounds were the gentle waters of the nearby Black Lake, and the buzzing of summer insects.

“Why not?” He grinned and leant towards you, puckering up his lips with a teasing glint in his eyes.

Suddenly, your lungs felt rather tight, and your pulse throbbed with panic and anticipation. This was not how you had envisioned your afternoon with Sebastian panning out. Half of you was tempted to shove him away, scolding words on your tongue about him being indecent and a scoundrel. The other half of you was licking your lips and fighting the urge to lean in closer, to jump off the ledge into exploration, just to see what all the fuss over a snog was about.

Was Sebastian right? What harm could it do? You were friends. You trusted him.

“Okay,” you said quickly, summoning that Gryffindor courage.

Sebastian’s eyes widened and he stilled, sucking in a shaky breath. “Alright,” he said, a little nervously, perhaps not expecting you to agree.

But, you were all in now. 

Staring at him, you shuffled a little closer, your robe scrunching up beneath your legs. You were sure you were breathing too quickly, too loudly, and tried to steady the rush and flutter of nerves in your stomach as you wiped a sweaty palm against your knee. “One kiss on the lips, agreed?”

Sebastian nodded, his hair bouncing, his eyes fixed firmly on yours. Your breath was shaking as you leaned your head towards him, closer and closer, his scent filling your nose. It was familiar and comforting. He had hugged you before, many times, but you had never been this close to his face. You were sure you could see each defined freckle, the pores of his skin over his nose, long enviable lashes that framed wide, expectant eyes. You could pick out flecks of hazel and gold in the brown of his irises, the pupils enlarging as you came within inches of his face. As his lips parted with a soft breath, your gaze dipped to the slope and curve of his mouth. Bloody hell, you were going to kiss him!

Nerves squeezed you, a shaky breath quickly becoming a giggle that burst from your mouth, your cheeks flaming as you brought your fingers to your lips. Sebastian looked mortified. “I’m so sorry,” you gasped, more giggles spilling from you. “I’m sorry. I’m nervous…”

Sebastian flinched and pulled back, his own cheeks flooding with colour. “We don’t have to, you know,” he said awkwardly, pushing a hand through his hair. “Not if you don’t want to.”

“I’m sorry,” you said again, reaching out to put your hand over his. “My nerves got the better of me. Perhaps I am more shy than I thought. Maybe…maybe if you closed your eyes or something, so that you aren’t looking at me. It might be easier.”

Sebastian’s brow furrowed with uncertainty as he shifted, but then he nodded. “Alright,” he said, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand. “Try again. I’ll close my eyes this time.”

You watched as his eyes closed, his lashes fanning out across the tops of his freckled cheeks as he tilted his face expectantly towards you. Taking a deep breath, you leant forwards again, nerves making your heart thunder in your ears.

Aiming for his mouth, you closed your eyes and pressed your lips to his in a quick kiss that made a smacker of a sound in the quiet surroundings. The soft warmth of his mouth was a shock against yours. Bloody hell, you had just kissed a boy!

Leaning back, your heart in your mouth, you opened your eyes to see his reaction. You were almost rigid with nerves, expecting him to have hated it. Sebastian’s eyes were still closed, his lips slightly parted, and his cheeks crimson.

“Again,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Properly this time.”

Again?!?

Speechless, you stared at him, but his eyes remained closed. Eyes fixed on his mouth, you brushed the tip of your finger over your lips, taking a deep breath before leaning forwards again. Now that you had done it once, you felt bolder, and you took your time as you pressed your mouth against his in a soft kiss. Lingering against the warmth, your pulse flickering like a dancing flame, you felt his lips apply pressure to yours in a return kiss.

Oh my…

All of a sudden, one kiss became two kisses, soft and tentative touches that made your lips tingle, and your stomach felt like liquid warmth. Three kisses…four…

Each press of lips became longer as you relaxed into the feel of it, your body feeling so hot and flustered, and yet, you also wanted to melt against him. Who knew that kissing could feel so…nice?

Sebastian’s lips were soft, and they slotted so perfectly against yours that it was so easy to keep doing it. As he tilted his head, the tip of his nose brushing against your cheek as he pressed a longer, harder kiss against your mouth at a different angle, a thrill of searing heat spiralled up through your core. It was shocking, exciting, but also overwhelming. Gasping softly, you pulled back, your eyes opening to meet the deep, warm brown of Sebastian’s.

“Well, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” He said, his habitual smirk on his mouth.

No, it really wasn’t. In fact, you were at a loss for words as you looked at him. Managing a shy smile, you shifted backwards, biting your lip as they burned with the feel of his kisses. It was hard to ignore the rush of heat, the flutter of every nerve ending as you thought about it. The sneaking suspicion was already creeping over you that you had enjoyed kissing him a little too much, and that could make this very awkward.

“I guess that breaks the kissing barrier now,” you said, tucking strands of hair behind your ear. “There is nothing to stop you asking out Violet anymore.”

“Perhaps,” Sebastian said, adjusting his trousers and fiddling with his tie as he looked out over the lake, his cheeks still flushed. “I’ll think about it.”

Closing your book with a soft thump, you slid another glance his way, a strange, crushing disappointment beginning to snake up through your stomach at the realisation that he might actually ask Violet out this weekend. It was a rather startling and unnerving realisation that you didn’t want him to.

Touching your fingertips to your lips, you wondered if you had just made a huge mistake kissing Sebastian, because now it was all you could think about.

….*....

The Great Hall was bustling with students having dinner, the ceiling mirroring the soft summer sky outside filling the room with a warm, evening glow. You sat at the Gryffindor table, poking at the food on your plate as you replayed, yet again, the soft kisses you had shared with Sebastian near the lake this afternoon. Your head was consumed with the memory, your fingers straying to your mouth to touch where his lips had pressed so softly against yours. It left you breathless to remember the tingles and flare of warmth that had awoken within you, leaving you confused as to what this meant now. 

What had been a playful suggestion of experimentation between friends was now a suggestive promise of something new and enticing. Even now, sitting at the table, surrounded by your fellow housemates, your gaze was drawn towards the Slytherin table where Sebastian was sitting with Ominis.

Keeping your eyelids slightly lowered, you watched Sebastian through your lashes, noticing the way his hands moved when he spoke, the little tilt of his mouth when he was amused. How had you not noticed how handsome he was before? Was it simply that he had been right in front of you, so close that you hadn’t taken a moment to really study him? Was it because you were so comfortable within your bubble of friendship that you had not thought to seek anything more from him?

The touch of his kiss had changed all that, and you were staring at your Slytherin friend through new eyes.

“You have been poking at that potato for a good five minutes, and I’ve not seen you eat a mouthful yet,” Garreth said, leaning towards you. Looking up at him, you could see the glimmer of concern in the depths of his green eyes. “Is everything alright? Are you not hungry?”

Looking down at the dinner you had been pushing around your plate with an awkward smirk, you put down your fork with a sigh. “Not really, but I’m alright,” you said, managing a small smile for him. “I was just miles away.”

“Somewhere nice I hope,” he smiled, lifting his juice goblet. 

Your gaze drifted back towards the Slytherin table. Somewhere very nice.

Sebastian was smiling, leaning across the table as he spoke to someone, and you realised it was Violet. Perhaps he had plucked up the courage to ask her out after all. The dreamy look on your face froze, your eyes dropping down towards your uneaten dinner. Sickened at the sight, you pushed the plate away and moved to stand. Pausing as Garreth spoke your name with a look of concern, you waved him off with a strained smile. “I’m fine, honestly. I think I just need some air.”

Avoiding any more glances Sebastian’s way lest you see something you didn’t wish to, you swiftly left the Great Hall, wishing you could turn the clock back a few hours and get that comforting feeling of friendship to return that you feared you had lost.

….*....

The sun was setting when you returned to the castle, lights beginning to appear in the windows as you walked slowly through the huge doors and into the coolness of the corridors. Walking around the lake hadn’t really done much in the way of easing your troubled thoughts. Worried that you had damaged your friendship, you debated bringing it all up with Sebastian, worried that doing so would just hammer in a whole new level of separation between you. 

Unwittingly, your feet took you towards the Defence Against the Dark Arts Tower, the soft tap of your boots on the marble echoing down the halls as you headed towards the Undercroft. Checking over your shoulder, you slipped behind the staircase and entered through the clock, making your way down into the depths of the secret chamber. Laughter reached your ears, and as the iron grate lifted to grant you access, you could see Sebastian and Ominis sitting on a rug playing Exploding Snap. 

You smiled as Sebastian turned at the sound of your entrance, his gaze lingering on you, making you wonder if you were imagining the look in his eyes as they wandered downwards as you approached. Of course you were imagining it, he wanted to ask Violet out after all, you were just his practice kiss. Heart squeezing, you turned your attention towards Ominis, his head tilted as he listened to your steps, his lips curving into a slight smile.

“Good evening, little lion,” he said softly. “Would you like to join us?”

Glancing at Sebastian, you nodded and moved to sit down, choosing to situate yourself next to Ominis. The move didn’t go unnoticed, your gaze meeting with Sebastian’s as warmth flooded your face, the look between you lingering as he reshuffled the cards.

Pushing away any tempting thoughts about staring at his mouth, you focused on the game, feeling some of the tension relax from your shoulders as you laughed along with your two favourite Slytherins. Ominis was as sharp as ever, still managing to win two out of three games you played, his haughty smug pride making you chuckle as your gaze met with Sebastian’s yet again. Each look felt loaded with something heavier this evening, his eyes seemingly drawn to you and lingering for longer, your own gaze seeking him out and noticing more things that just hadn’t occurred to you before. 

His shirt sleeves were rolled up exposing his forearms, and this wasn’t something you hadn’t seen before, and yet now you noticed the defined lines of his muscle, the graceful way he held his hands. How had you not noticed how his long fingers splayed out in a way that made you wonder how it would feel to have them against your skin. His shirt collar was loosened, a tempting glimpse of collar bone peeking through the gap above where his tie was hanging scruffily about his neck, and your eyes were drawn to it against every effort not to stare at him. 

The angle of his jaw, the slope of his nose, the way his hair flicked around his ears, the dusting of freckles on his arms that had you wondering if he had them elsewhere on his body. His laughter sounded richer, his smiles more beautiful, and the wicked gleam in his eyes when he teased was now fanning the new flames that were igniting swiftly inside of you.

Godric’s balls. You were getting a crush on Sebastian. 

….*....

After a night of restless dozing, any sleep filled with dreams of smothering heat and soft lips, you struggled to keep focus in potions the next morning. The lack of concentration led to a rather impressive failure that rivalled anything Garreth could have caused, much to Sharp’s disgruntled disapproval. Feeling like a failure, and utterly baffled by the way your body was betraying you, it was with a resigned smile that you left potions as Garreth gave you a conspiratorial pat on the shoulder. 

Wandering along the corridor on the way to lunch, you wondered how long this apparent crush was going to cripple you, making you stare longingly across the classroom at Sebastian’s gorgeous face, only to blush furiously and dip your gaze when his eyes shifted your way in return. It was all rather foolish really, and he was going to wonder what on earth was wrong with you if you kept this up for too long.

“There you are,” a deep voice sounded in your ear, making you jump. Clutching your bag tighter against you, a blush staining your cheeks, you looked up at familiar brown eyes. His hand ghosted at the small of your back, invoking a shiver that you immediately tried to suppress, but he was already taking hold of your elbow. “Come on, I need to talk to you.”

Pulse quickening, you let him hurry you along, your other hand nervously tucking hair behind your ear. “Where are we going?”

Sebastian merely smirked and turned corners, marching along until he came to a door set amongst portraits in a quiet corridor, a swift unlocking charm had him dragging you inside and the door closed behind you both with a soft click. It was a cupboard stuffed full of all manner of oddities, your eyes glancing around in confusion.

“Did you just drag me into a cupboard?” You asked, incredulous, turning to look at him.

Sebastian blushed furiously, his hand scratching at the back of his neck. “I did,” he said, biting his lower lip. “I er…well, I was wondering...I was hoping…”

He groaned and closed his eyes, turning to pace up and down, tugging at his collar.

You frowned and began to fiddle nervously on the hem of your sleeve. “What is it?”

“Yesterday…” He paused, his look sheepish as he stepped closer. “Our unsanctioned research by the lake…”

Heat flooded your own cheeks and you shifted awkwardly. “Oh no, it’s going to be weird between us, isn’t it,” you said, your voice wobbling slightly.

“Oh, no, no,” he said quickly, his eyes widening as he held his hands up. “I don’t want it to be weird, not at all! You know me, I rather enjoy research, particularly the unsanctioned kind, and especially with you.”

You stilled, staring at him, your heart beginning to thump a beat harder.

His lips twitched with a hopeful smile. “I was wondering…maybe we should try a proper kiss, just in case…”

A gasp left your lips as you stared, your blood now fizzing madly with your racing pulse. You could see the hope and fear in his eyes, knowing him well enough to see that this had taken some courage to drag you in here and ask this of you. A glimmer of hope bloomed in your chest that maybe, just maybe, he had been thinking similar thoughts as you after yesterday.

As on edge as he looked, it was just too tempting to taunt the poor boy further, and you let a slow smirk spread across your face.

“Are you suggesting that yesterday, I did not kiss you properly, Sebastian?”

His mouth worked as a slight wince creased his brow, and your smirk widened. Then, his eyes narrowed, and his stance shifted into something much more like his usual bold, confidence. “I wouldn’t say that you didn’t kiss me properly, it’s more a case of I don’t think we gathered enough evidence to make a definitive conclusion.”

You raised one eyebrow and folded your arms. “Oh really?”

The smirk that lifted his lips made you swallow hard, threatening the demeanour of control that you were aiming for. How had you not noticed how utterly gorgeous he was before? It was borderline shameful how you had missed it. 

Sebastian stepped even closer. “Absolutely, and therefore, I recommend a second experiment. A more thorough experiment, if you’re willing.”

Dropping your bag to the floor, you stepped forward to meet him, tilting your head just so in order to look up into his eyes. Staring into their depths, you couldn’t even begin to question how right this felt. Apart from one little niggle.

“Did you ask Violet to accompany you to Hogsmeade?” You asked, holding your breath.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “How could I when I’m already going with someone else?”

Your brow furrowed. “Who?”

He leaned in, his mouth dangerously close to yours, his eyes blazing like a glorious sunset. “You, of course,” he said softly.

It was his turn to make the first move this time, pressing his mouth against yours in a firm kiss that made your eyelids flutter closed, your hands sliding up the front of his green plaid waistcoat. You had no idea how good it would feel to have his fingers glide along your jawline and sink deeply into your hair, pushing loose any pins you had used to try and make yourself look respectable this morning.

This had never been the plan when you had talked about this yesterday, you had only been meaning to prepare yourselves for kissing someone else, but your head was empty of anything but his kisses and touch in the low light of the storage room. It felt so right to cup his face, holding him in place as he kissed you with a slow thoroughness that made you part your lips in a soft gasp. But, he wasn’t done yet…

Taking advantage of your parted lips, he swiped a deliciously slow slide of his tongue along your lower lip, your heart racing as he tentatively pushed it into your mouth. You had read about kisses such as this, the very thought of it invoking day dreams that filled you with longing. The real thing stole your very breath, your mouth welcoming the silky, soft warmth of him with a low moan. His quickened breaths filled your ears as he kissed you deeply, the taste of him making your head spin as his hand moved to grasp your waist.

Sliding your hands up the back of his neck, your fingers explored the soft strands of his hair, your back arching as he urged you closer against him. He was solid and warm, he was everything you found comforting and familiar, and yet his mouth and hands were waking something new and so very exciting inside of you. 

It probably wasn’t skilled, or refined, your hands and mouths carefully exploring with daring and curiosity, but it felt so good. Sebastian felt so good. Why didn’t you see it before? How could it be anyone else but him?

Pausing, his lips damp and his breaths quick and hot against your cheek as he pressed his forehead to yours, you gazed up at him with your hands still curled into his hair.

“What’s the conclusion?” You asked. 

His hand caressed your cheek, his smile warm and soft as he brushed back your hair and traced the curve of your ear. “We need to keep practising,” he whispered, his thumb tracing the curve under your lower lip. “I reckon, in time, we could be rather good at this.”

“Well, don’t stop now,” you said, returning his smile. 

“So, I’m worth all the waiting then, am I?” He asked, that teasing gleam in his eyes.

“Easy now, Sallow,” you chuckled, a grin curving your mouth. “It’s going to take a few more practice sessions before I could possibly comment on that.”

“That can most definitely be arranged,” he murmured, before claiming your mouth once more in a bone melting kiss.

As always, huge love and thanks to my Discord girls for keeping me inspired. 💜✨️

[pyramid-of-starrs]

More clingy/possessive/obsessive san x Black reader those make me go feral ! LOL

PTA Parent: Celebrating 300 Followers!

Daddy San x Mommy Fem reader

Summary: You and San are married with a beautiful Daughter, sometimes you both can get busy in your day-to-day life and with a clingy husband like San it can absolutely get annoying.

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Parent AU

Warnings: Acts of possessiveness, some toxic behavior from San, pushy man, mentions of killing (no one dies), adultery??

Smut warnings: Spanking, crying, vaginal sex, oral (F receiving), unprotected sex, mentions of impregnation, let me know if I missed anything!

A/N: I'm kinda unsure about how I feel about this story so please let me know what you think in the comments! Also there might be hella typos lol

Minors dni

"Breakfast is ready." You said as you finished setting up the table still in your robe and pjs, the sounds of two sets of foot steps heading your way could be heard, one belonging to your 6 year old daughter Anya and the other belonging to your husband San. They both enter the kitchen after San finished getting Anya dressed and doing her hair in two curly puffs. The little girl runs over to her seat at the end of the table where she waits for her daddy to pull out her chair and push it back in, then San walks over to give you a kiss on the cheek before heading to the other end of the table and they both thank you for the meal.

"Mommy look at my hair! Daddy did it by himself this time and it barely hurt." Anya said as she moved her head back and forth to show off her new hairstyle.

"Wooow so pretty, daddy did a good job! Even better than me." You exaggerated to make your child and husband feel better.

"No! He'll never be as good as Mommy! He is too rough with his hands!" She protested while you giggled.

"Heeey, Daddy is really good with his hands, if I wasn't you probably wouldn't be here." San said while continuing to eat, you kicked him under the table for his joke, once everyone finished eating you cleared the table while San got ready to take your daughter to school then he was heading to work. While on the way out you hugged Anya and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Have a good day Honey, Mommy loves you."

"I love you more Mommy!" Anya said back while hugging you.

"No, I love you more." You playfully said back.

"Well I love mommy the absolute mostest in the world!" she excitedly said, San pouted a bit.

"What about Daddy Anya? Don't you love Daddy too?"

"Not as much as mommy! I love Mommy more than anyone."

"Not more than me! I love her way more!" San said as he pulled you up from your child to kiss you, Anya's little fist started to hit her father's leg.

"Get off my mommy!" She yelled.

"She was my mommy first!" He argued back.

"San!" You hit him on the shoulder, this was a pretty normal occurrence, San has always been clingy even before you two started dating, he moved fast throughout the relationship and immediately expressed his interest in marrying you and making a family, little did you know you two would just end up making a mini San that is just as obsessed with you.

"Since I'm off early tonight and Anya is going home with her friend from class maybe we could go out to dinner." He said as he held your waist.

"Baby I would love to but you know I go to PTA on Friday nights." You replied as San's signature pouty lip returned.

"You can't miss this one? I've been working like crazy and I miss you so much, we haven't had a "play date" since Monday." San replied, your face heated up a bit since play dates were the code you used for sex, though he was right, you would be lying if you said you didn't also miss being with your husband intimately. Your sex drive was fairly normal and technically so was San's but it wasn't about the need to cum for him, it was about the need to feel you in a way that no one else can, feeling you wrapped around him while he listened to your beautiful moans and whimpers with your nails making artwork on his back made him crazy, getting to see your beautiful bare brown skin was pure bliss for him. Though it was a beautiful and raw moment for San it was something a bit different for you, Sans obsession with you and your body tends to make him a little crazy in the bedroom, it's almost like cuteness aggression, except instead of wanting to squeeze you San wants to fuck you until you can't walk, think or see straight. The day that you two got married he fucked you all night and made you two almost miss your flight to your honeymoon.

"I-I know but I can't miss this meeting, the person I'm partnered with needs me for the school bake sale prep." he gazed into your eyes hoping that you would change your mind but as much as he wanted you all to himself he just had to be okay with that not being realistic.

"Fine, I guess it can't be helped then, Anya why don't you run upstairs and grab the mini shiber plush I gave you so you can have someone to sleep with tonight at your friend's house." San said looking down at his daughter.

"Good idea Daddy!" the little girl cutely ran up the stairs to get her toy, though it seemed like an innocent suggestion it was just San's way of getting you alone for two seconds because as soon as your daughter was out of the room San kissed you hard with vigor and emotion, inserting his tongue in your mouth to swirl it around yours. All you could do is submit and whimper while you felt your core heat up, he managed to pin you against the door as he gripped your ass and placed his other hand against the door next to your head, when he pulled back from the kiss a string of spit followed his lips that connected yours

He leaned down to whisper into your ear. "I'm off tomorrow and Anya will be at her friend's still so expect to not get anything done and clear your schedule okay? " He stared directly into your eyes and soul with nothing but pure lust, San can't go too long without fucking you, it makes him unwell, you nodded your head to agree. "Use your words."

"Y-yes San." you said softly.

"Good girl." He said pecking your lips one more time before Anya re-entered the room with her plushie in hand. "Alright let's go Anny! Tell mommy bye."

"Bye Mommy!" They both said in sync as they left, you were still in disarray. Why did it just feel like you signed your soul to the devil?

...

Later that night you were sitting at your PTA meeting as San blew up your phone with messages of him telling you he missed you and all the unspeakable things he wanted to do to you. You sat at the table just watching the messages roll in, your breathing becoming shorter as you anticipated the things your husband had in store for you.

"Y/N? Did you hear me?" A voice snapped you out of your thoughts.

"Huh? Oh no sorry could you repeat that?" you said back to the person, the person being one of the other parents on the PTA, Kyle, he was the father of one of the girls in Anya's class that she was close with. He was recently divorced and splitting custody with his ex-wife, his daughter lived with his ex which is where Anya was having a sleepover at, you and San only ever interacted with the mom so meeting Kyle now was a bit random. He knew that the kids were close and that's why he asked to partner up with you for the bake sale project, at least that's what you assumed.

"Everything alright Y/N? You kinda left Earth for a second." He asked.

"Yeah, my husband is just freaking out about what he should have for dinner." Technically that wasn't a lie but San's dilemma was more so about the fact that he couldn't have you for dinner but Kyle didn't need to know that.

"Yeah sounds about right for us guys haha, anyways I asked if it was okay if I came over tomorrow night so we could get the baking for Sunday done? Then I can take everything in my car and drop it off since we don't have to be there." He suggested.

"That actually sounds like a good plan, my husband wanted to hang out tomorrow but I can cancel on him." you said while smiling at him.

"Cancelling for little ol me, oh I'm charmed." You both laughed, Kyle was a sweet guy but the rumor around school was that he was a cheater which is why his ex left him but he was so nice could that really be true?

...

"What!" San yelled while drying dishes in his little apron and dish gloves like he was a housewife.

"I'm sorry baby I know that you wanted me to yourself tomorrow but I really have to get the sweets done for the bake sale on Sunday." You said as you stood next to him in your nightgown, you had come home, ate dinner, and immediately got in the shower so you could get ready for tomorrow.

"This isn't fair Y/N! I have needs too, I haven't been inside you in almost a damn week, how do you expect me to live like this!" He dramatically pouted.

"Stop being dramatic San." You said folding your arms.

"I just... miss you, I work all day and by the time I come home we are both too tired to do anything besides cuddling which I love but... I miss connecting with you on that level, I know you have a lot going on but I can't help but feel this way..." He said as he took off his gloves and turned the sink off. You felt for San, you missed him too, especially in an intimate way and you had to give it to him he has really matured from when you first started dating because old San wouldn't have cared and would fuck you until you were too tired to do the bake sale.

"Aww baby I miss you too." You said as you cupped both sides of his sharp jaw, his hand held yours as his thumb rubbed the back of your hand and you both looked into each other's eyes. "I just have to do this one thing tomorrow then I'm all yours okay?" you pecked his still pouted lip.

"Okay, I love you." He said giving you a smirk to make sure you didn't worry about him.

"I love you more, let's go to bed, I have to get up early to go shopping."

You both went to bed too tired to do much of anything but San snuggled his face into your chest as you both drifted off to sleep. By the morning time you had left for the store to buy everything you needed for the bake sale. When you finally made it back home in the late afternoon, you texted Kyle your address and San was already gone, probably to spend the evening with his friends since he wanted to give you your space. Kyle arrived about an hour later, which was enough time for you to prep everything needed and start on the first batch of sweets. You walked to the front door to let him in.

"Hey, come in, glad you made it safe!" you smiled while stepping to the side to let him in.

"Hey, can't believe our kids have been friends this long and this is the first time I've been here, lovely home you got here Y/N." He said as he walked deeper into the house following you to the kitchen.

"Oh the credit isn't just mine my husband planned the renovations and I just decorated and furnished it."

"Well, the woman is who makes the home." He said winking at you.

That was kinda weird but whatever" you thought to yourself.

"Well I finished the first back and they are cooled down you wanna start boxing everything?"

“Sure thing” You and Kyle got to work baking and boxing, you didn’t even notice the time flying by until you looked up to see it was dark outside. You looked at your Apple Watch to see it was 8:36 pm you wondered for a moment where San was but then the cookie timer went off.

…

A cup slams down on the bar, shaking the remaining ice in it. “Another Jack and Coke please.” San asked the bartender.

“2 drinks in one night buddy? Something going on?” Wooyoung asked as he drank his beer.

“I miss my fucking wife Woo.” A red San replied as he received his next drink.

“Did she go somewhere? What happened to your weekend you had planned to-“

“Planned to fuck her brains out and romance her while my sweet princess was away? Unfortunately that won't be happening because of this dumb school bake sale she's doing for the PTA. Now I only get one day with her." San said as he dramatically dropped his head on the bar.

"Oh yeah I think my husband mentioned that to me, at least you've got tomorrow." Wooyoung said as he rubbed San's back to cheer him up, then San's phone rang, the name "Mrs. Choi" with lots of hearts and a photo of you and Anya flashed on his screen, he immediately answered.

"Hi my love, I miss you, need me to come home and eat-"

"Don't even finish that sentence San, I'm calling because I was letting you know that I'm probably going to have to go to the bake sale tomorrow." You said, San's face dropping.

"I thought you were only baking for the bake sale, isn't the volunteering covered for tomorrow?" San asked.

"Yeah that was originally the plan but Kyle thinks that I should come to help out just in case someone has questions about the sweets or-"

"Who is Kyle?" San questioned.

"Oh, He's Sana's ex-husband, you know Anya is their daughter's best friend, you probably never met since you both work so heavily." You replied.

"You're baking cookies with another man in my house Y/N?"

"Um- first of all this is our house." You replied somewhat taken aback by San's tone.

"I don't give a damn about that right now Y/N, my wife, baking with another man in my kitchen, in my house and now he's taking another one of My days with you?" You could hear San somewhat spiraling.

"Why do you keep saying my like-"

"Like what Y/N?? I keep saying my because it's true. The house is mine, the kitchen is mine, the stove you're using is mine, YOU ARE MINE!" He yelled at the end as he slammed his fist on the bar startling everyone in the vicinity.

"I'm not your fucking property San! I thought you grew out of this possessive thing!" You yelled back.

"I'll never grow out of thinking you belong to me and only me Y/N stop fucking playing with me." the sternness in his voice was sharp.

"Boy, who the fuck do you- you know what, whatever San, I'm glad Kyle asked me to come tomorrow, I'd rather spend tomorrow with him and everyone else than with you right now! And when you come home sleep on the damn couch." Before he could respond you ended the call, leaving San's eye to twitch, the argument combined with the lack of quality time was enough to send San into a coma but you saying you'd rather spend time with another man than him made him see red, he only came back down to earth when Wooyoung's hand landed on his shoulder.

"Calm down buddy, come back to earth." San took a few deep breaths and ran his finger through his hair while he groaned.

"I'm going crazy Woo." San said taking another drink from his cup.

"I don't want to contribute to it buuut, I wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't tell you." Wooyoung said, San looked over at him confused.

"Tell me what?"

"Well, that guy, Kyle? On the PTA? He was married to Sana who's my husband's best friend so naturally he knows the details of their divorce and my husband told me everything..."

"Okay?"

"Okay so... Kyle was a cheater, like big time, but he is specifically known as a PTA home wrecker, he's slept with most of the moms on the PTA." Wooyoung and San's eyes met.

"What the hell are you saying Wooyoung?" San said with all seriousness immediately sobering up.

"I'm saying you need to get home before a serial wife fucker makes a move on your wife." Wooyoung finished his beer. "Go, I'll pay." San didn't waste any more time and left the bar.

....

You hung up from San knowing that the conversation went south but honestly, who does he think he is talking to you like that?

"Everything alright? Didn't mean to overhear the ending of that..." Kyle said walking back into the house from loading the baked goods into his car.

"Sorry about that... Yes, everything is fine just-"

"Marital problems? Trust me, I get it. I am flattered you said you would rather spend time with me..." He cleared his throat, coming off a bit shy. "and everyone else of course."

You chuckled at his shy response. "Yeah my husband's just being a brat is all, it's just been a while since me and him have spent time together so he's going crazy." You may have been oversharing but eh, so what.

"You know Y/N if you want someone to talk about it with I have some wine in the car I picked up on the way over." You shrugged your shoulders why not indulge him.

"Don't worry, I have a bottle in the fridge that's already open I'll get us some glasses." You walked over to the kitchen to grab glasses and then to pour you two a glass. Kyle followed you into the kitchen and smiled watching you pour the glasses then took the one you offered to him.

"To the bake sale." he said as you two clinked your glasses together then drank. "How long have you and your husband been married Y/N?" he asked.

"7 years, we got married then had Anya immediately after, my husband is very persistent about spending a lot of time with me, and around the time Anya was born he started his job so he rarely gets to spend a lot of time with us so I know it takes a toll on him." You said sipping more from your glass.

"I see, so he's a bit clingy then?"

A bit is putting it nicely, San is so clingy he got upset that he couldn't go to your bachelorette party and threw a tantrum. "Yeah you could say that, how long were you married ?" You asked.

"12 years, we were happy until we weren't anymore, then we only took care of our daughter together until we decided to call it quits after a fuck up on my end." He said as he swirled the wine in his glass.

"A fuck up?" you asked.

"Yeah, a fuck up, but I've learned from my mistakes, the next woman I'll cherish her, giving her my time and love from head to toe." He said as he sat the glass on the counter.

"You could have done that with your wife." You thought to yourself. "Well, I hope you find her soon." You half-heartedly smiled, he absolutely cheated and when you were done being mad at San you couldn't wait to tell him, you told him all your little PTA tea as if he cared, he just liked hearing you ramble.

"You know Y/N, I think I did find her." He said looking at you. "I need a woman that's attentive, who cares, who doesn't put her career over me, who isn't going to complain when I'm late for dinner, whole love me and my fault." He said as he stepped a bit closer to you.

"You did? A-and who might that be? She sounds like a catch!" You asked as you noticed him getting closer.

"You Y/N, I need a woman like you." He continued to step to you as you backed up.

"Oh- no, no you don't-"

"Yes, I do, a woman as gorgeous and understanding and caring as you are. You even said yourself that you would rather spend time with me." He backed you into a wall.

"Dude what? I was just talking shit, I'm married and happily at that." you looked at him with disgust.

"Marriage shouldn't stop you from finding your soulmate Y/N. Let me give you what he can't, let me give you what you need." he said as he grabbed your shoulders.

"And what does she need?" Kyle started to lean in then stopped when he heard the voice in the distance, he looked back and you looked over Kyle's shoulder to see your husband standing calmly however you could tell he was pissed. "Kyle right? I'm San, Y/Ns husband, now tell me what do you think my wife needs? Because I am in charge of handling all her needs and wants." Sans slit eyes stared directly into Kyle's eyes.

"I, uh" Kyle said stumbling over his words.

"Why don't you take your hands off my wife and get the fuck out of my house." The air was intense, Kyle released you from his grip and then cleared his throat again.

"I-I guess I need to head out then Y/N." You both awkwardly looked at each other then he walked toward the front door after hesitantly passing San.

"By the way Kyle, my wife won't be there tomorrow, she'll be preoccupied." San added before Kyle left the house, San followed him to the door. "And stay the fuck away from my wife." he said slamming the door and then locking it. San slowly walked over to you, for some reason you felt nervous, scared even, he didn't say a word but picked you up by the legs and threw you over his shoulders.

"S-San what are you doing? Put me down!" You squirmed in his arms as he walked up the stairs. He was not phased by your attempts to get out of his grasp but you still fought him. You had to stay mad at him for being kind of a jerk over the phone but damn it was hot how he just kicked Kyle out of the house. San reached your shared bedroom and dropped you on the bed, he stood there looking over your body.

"Strip." was all he said, you wanted to protest more but his tone was so demanding and assertive you had to listen, you sat up on your knees and removed your long bodycon maxi dress that had splotches of flour and chocolate from the baking, you were left on the bed wearing a lace black bra and panty set, his sharp eyes scanned over your body, it made you shy so you covered yourself with your arms.

"Don't be shy now baby, you sure weren't shy when you were telling me you weren't mine on the phone." San said.

"I didn't say I wasn't!" You argued.

San got closer then reached down to grab your chin and point your face up to him.

"Did I say to speak my love?" his voice was very dry and stern, he was serious, over the years San had agreed to get his clingy and possessive ways under control and keep his antics down to a minimum, however everyone has a breaking point. Addiction for some people was hard, going without something caused withdrawals and San was going through withdrawals after not touching you for almost a week. Tuesday he was good, no complaints or anything but he definitely needed you tomorrow. Wednesday he spent his break at work locking his office door to fuck his hand while he was on the phone with you while you talked about your day, but that wasn't enough. Thursday he thought about the many ways he was going to have you while he worked out at the gym, he was excited to get off early tomorrow so he could spend the day fucking you. Friday when you left for PTA he laid in bed aimlessly staring at the ceiling, the smell of you started to engulf him he closed his eyes and bit his lips thinking of how bad he needed to feel you, to hold you, to hear your cries of pleasure, he wanted you more than anything, then his eyes opened and he realized he was holding on of your pillows while thrusting into it. Saturday after another disappointment and him waking up to his face no longer comfortably nuzzled into your bosom he was just upset, to hell with the PTA at this point, usually he at least had a filter for his obsession with you, your adorable daughter Anya but with her being away for the weekend he couldn't do much, he even tried to call to get Anya from her friends and she said "No daddy I'm having fun." San wanted to snap and say he didn't care and go get her anyway but he vowed to not let his ways affect his precious baby girl.

Instead he spent the day with his best friend trying his best not to be anxious or angry but Wooyoung could always read him like a book. He could see the anger seething from San, the frustration and when he told San about Kyle he got nervous, San wouldn't kill him right? Wooyoung sent a prayer and moved on. When San arrived at the house he wondered if he should go in guns blazing and utilize all his pent-up frustration to teach a low life like Kyle a lesson but he didn't want you to see him like that. When he walked in to see Kyle's hands on what was his and to hear him saying he wanted to give you "What you need" oh San was not happy, not at all.

Now here you were sitting over San's lap while he spanked you, one smack after the other hitting harder than the last.

"Who do you belong to Y/N?" San said landing another strike on your ass, tears streamed down your face while you wore a dazed look on your face.

"You San, please." Your voice was hoarse from the yelping every time he would hit you again.

"Please what my love?" He asked halting his next strike.

"No more San, I can't... I can't take it."

"Yes my darling, I'm sorry if I went to far." San said as he helped you up then laid you on the bed, he wiped the tear sitting at the corner of your eye. "I just need people to know that you belong to me and only me, obviously the ring on your finger isn't enough." San started to kiss from your neck down the length of your body, he had already covered you in love bites and hickeys, you remember telling him "Black people can't get hickeys" and damn did he prove you wrong over the years. His lips reached your thighs, he wasted no time removing your panties then kissing around your slick-covered pussy.

"I need you and everyone else to understand that you are mine and only mine, only I can fill your needs." San said as lips peppered teasing kisses on your core.

"Of course I know that Saaah~" Your sentence was interrupted by his sudden attachment to your clit, he started to suck passionately like he wanted to hear you struggle.

"Do you though darling?"

"Yesss, fuck, yes!" You moaned out while your hands ran through his hair.

"I don't think you do, why were you willing to spend so much time with someone else then?" He held your slit in his mouth while flicking it with his tongue, you tried to squirm away but he held your thighs tightly.

"I told you nghh~ it was for the PTA-"

"I don't give a fuck about that damn PTA Y/N!" he slid his two fingers into your already pulsing hole, he started slow for a second then immediately started to finger fuck you faster, more pleading whimpers fell from your lips as you tried to close your legs.

"Fuck I'm going to cum San !" you yelled out, his pace never slowed down while he licked stripes up your clit while alternating between licking and sucking it.

"Cum for me my love, cover me in all of you." Almost like it was on command you came on San's face, your slick oozed down his chin while he continued to eat you out through your orgasm, however even when your body stopped spasming he didn't stop. You yelled out while trying to push his head away but he wouldn't move, the over-stimulation started to sting with the pleasure.

"San please." You cried out.

"All mine, I needed this so bad baby." He finally removed his face from your core to plant a sloppy kiss on your lips, you could taste yourself on his lips and tongue as he swirled his tongue into your mouth. The sloppy exchange caused your cum to smear onto your face as well when he pulled back, he licked the remaining cum off your face. "You taste so good my love, my wife, I'm so glad you're all mine." you could hear the desperation in his voice.

"I'm... I'm sorry San." You said looking into his eyes. "I'm sorry for what I said and I'm sorry for not prioritizing our time together."  the cutest little smile showed on his face before he pecked your lips once again.

"I just... I know you have a life Y/N but I can't help but feel like I need you." you pulled him down to kiss him, the kiss lingered a bit.

"I need you too Sannie, please take me, I feel so dirty knowing that man touched me."

"Yes my love, I'll make sure a low life like him never gets the chance to touch you again, I'll love you in my love so they know you only belong to me." San removed his clothes then climbed back on top of you and took off your bra. He bit his lips as he hovered over your naked form, he needed to take you now, he couldn't wait anymore. He pulled you down a bit more then turned you on your side, he put each of his legs on the side of your thigh that was on the bed while he held your other leg up with his thigh, the position looked a lot like scissoring? It confused you a bit as you never tried this position but before you could question him San slid his thick cock into your pleading walls making you moan softly for him. He sank deeper and deeper into you until you realized this was deeper than he normally could reach in missionary, you immediately felt the need to yell a string of curse words as you felt him in your gut.

When he heard your cry and watched your eyes roll he smirked watching you struggle, he slowly moved his hips back out then at a teasing rate pushed back into you, he repeated this motion a few times, watching you fidget and not knowing how to take him like you two hadn't fucked a million times. He pressed his hand on your lower stomach causing even more pleasure. "Do you feel me right here baby? Deep in your stomach?" you couldn't even properly respond as you whimpered at the feeling, it wasn't uncomfortable or painful, you just felt so stuffed full.

"San- Sannie, you're so deep." You huffed out as he sped up his pace a bit, his hips moving in a steady driving motion, you already started to feel dizzy from the pleasure, drunk off of your husband's dick going in and out of your sensitive cunt.

"I'm the only person who can be this deep inside of you, right baby?" He asked.

"Yeeess-" you answered but then you noticed San gradually picking up his pace more.

"Only me, only I can fuck you like this, only I can fuck you this deep." You realized he was going on a tangent, losing himself in the moment while his hips never stopped, he let your leg fall on his shoulders while he grabbed both sides of you and fucked you deeper and faster. "Mine, mine, all mine, only for me, this pussy can only be fucked by me, he doesn't have what you need, only I can give you what you need." San started to drive into you faster, your mouth was wide open but no sound was being pushed out while your eyes were fully in the back of your head, the ecstasy of how San was fucking was amazing enough but you had to admit there was a guilty pleasure behind his words of him claiming you like his territory.

As San continued to fuck you like his own personal fuck toy you started to feel your orgasm rushing forward, your walls contracting around his length causing him to drop his head back as the beads of sweat fell from his forehead and he groaned. "Sannie I'm about to cum again please, hold me." San looked at you as you twisted your body a bit to stretch your arms out to embrace him. He quickly pulled out to reposition you in missionary then put himself back inside of you. He leaned down to welcome your embrace while his hips bucked into you quickly.

You cupped San's face and looked him in his blown out eyes. "I love you so much San, I'm yours forever, and only yours." you said between trying to stay sane as he fucked you.

"Forever baby, only mine, I love you." connected your lips as you both tried to kiss wholesomely but with the pace of him fucking you and your moans going directly into his mouth it just turned sloppy. The kiss with San driving into you made you wrap your legs around him while he started to cum deep inside you, the rush of his hot cum sending you into a frenzy as your orgasm followed shortly after. San removed his lips from yours and held his still-leaking cock inside you, he looked at your fucked out face and pecked your lips a few times.

"I'm sorry if I lost myself for a bit Y/N" San said as he slowly dropped his body to lie on top of you. You smiled at him then peppered his sweaty face with kisses.

"It's okay Sannie, I love it when you tell me I'm yours." You smiled at each other again and decided it was time to get cleaned up and go to bed after a long night.

...

The next morning was peaceful, Anya had returned from her friend's house and sat in her daddy's lap as he forced her to watch anime with him, Anya grew to love it after a few sessions.

"Daddy this episode is so good! We should ask Mommy to join us." She looked back and said.

"Mommy is too far behind to watch with us." San replied

"Hey, I'm trying my best!" You yelled from the kitchen as you were making lunch.

"But you're right Anya we need a third person to watch with, how about Mommy and Daddy give you a sibling?" San smiled while your face heated up and Anya cheered, loving the idea of being a big sister.

"San!"

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

I don’t want you like a best friend | Xavier Thorpe x Reader

Summary: You and Xavier have been best friends for a while, but you don’t want to be just friends anymore. Come the Rave’n dance, you decide to tell him

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: suggestive themes

"Say my name and everything just stops I don't want you like a best friend Only bought this dress so you could take it off"

—

‘’Are you coming the the Rave’n dance?’’

‘’I don’t have a date.’’

‘’You could go with Xavier?’’ Enid suggested with a knowing grin.

You and Xavier have been best friends since your first year at Nevermore Academy. Being away from home for this long and adjusting to a new environment had been difficult. You missed your family and the comfort of home. Making friends wasn’t your strongest, so you ended up very lonely.

Until you met Xavier. Although he was part of the popular crowd, he preferred solitude. He could spend hours on his own, drawing or painting.

One day, his sketchbook fell out of his bag in botanical class and you were amazed by the close to perfection sketch of your mutual classmate, Ajax. You hadn’t been able to stop the compliment that spilled from your lips. Xavier had smiled, a little shy, and thanked you. The next day, he had made a drawing of you sitting in the courtyard, reading a book.

You never talked to him outside of class…until parents’s weekend. You had been anticipating that day for so long — you missed your parents very dearly —, only to hear from Principal Weems that morning that they would not be coming. Sadness had filled your heart and you ended up crying silently between two shelves at the library.

You weren’t the only student whose parents didn’t come. Some parents, like Xavier’s father, were so busy with their work life that they cared very little about their son’s school event. Unlike you, Xavier didn’t come to cry. He was looking for a book. Except he found you instead.

You spent the whole day together, getting to know each other and talking about anything but your parents and, for the first time in weeks, a smile curled on your lips. Especially when he shared with you his little ability of making his artwork move.

Your friendship tightened over the years, friends turning into best friends. You called each other during summer break, and sometimes visited because September was just too far away. The Thorpe manor was massive and Xavier had his own art studio — which was even bigger than his shed on school grounds.

It was nice to have a friend like him.

But since your last visit, some things changed. Your friendship had developed into deeper feelings — non-platonic feelings. You held back from acting on them because Xavier was freshly broken up with Bianca and hurting. You also didn’t want to be someone’s rebound.

‘’I heard he’s going with Bianca,’’ Wednesday butted in, making Enid narrow her eyes at her.

‘’Only because she asked him,’’ the blonde quickly clarified. ‘’It doesn’t look like they’re getting back together though. Like ever. Xavier’s been very indifferent toward Bianca lately.’’

Enid wasn’t wrong. You hadn’t heard Xavier say Bianca's name in the past two months and you were the second person he spent the most time with — after Ajax. He came to you when he had doubts about the genuineness of their relationships, so he would tell you if he was still into her. Right?

That’s how the plans were made.

‘’That means we’re going dress shopping!’’ Enid grabbed her pink fuzzy backpack, looking at you excitedly. ‘’You need a dress that screams ‘stand back bitches, he’s mine’.’’

*

There weren't many shops in Jericho, so everyone ended up in the same one. It’s gonna be a miracle if two girls don’t show up in the same dress.

The bell above Hawte Kewture dinged as you and Enid stepped in. ‘’The dance committee is suggesting all white to match with the team, but that’s not gonna fly with us. If you want to catch Xavier’s attention and make him see you as something else than a best friend, you need to stand out.’’

‘’I’m not gonna wear bright pink, if that’s what you’re suggesting.’’

You weren’t afraid of colors like Wednesday, but brighter tones and pastels were Enid’s palette. Not yours.

‘’That’s not what I had in mind. Come.’’

None of the dresses you tried were to your liking. Too much tule, too itchy, too plain. You needed something that would make the whole place shimmer, to quote Enid.

Time passed and, around you, your classmates were all finding their dresses. All except you. Even Enid had found hers — a white number with a fluffy collar and cuffs. You were starting to feel defeated.

A sigh left your lips. I'll never find anythi—’’ You cut yourself, catching a velvet fabric smushed between the tule and sequins. You plucked it from the rack and held it before you.

‘’What about this one?’’

Enid stopped flicking through the dresses and turned to you, approval flashing in her eyes. ‘’Yes! This is the dress,’’ she confirmed, squealing excitedly.

*

You and Enid were getting ready for the dance in her dorm, both of your makeup bags spilled and mixed up on her bed. It was a complete mess — and will probably be staining her comforter in some places because of a missing cap on a lipstick and a broken highlighter. Sorry, Enid.

‘’If Xavier doesn't kiss you tonight, he is the dumbest guy ever. I mean, look at you. If this doesn’t push him to make a move, someone else will.’’

But I don’t want someone else, you thought to yourself as you applied a light wash of color to your cheeks.

You didn’t want to be that girl, but to your eyes there was only Xavier.

His sweet smile that never fails to make your heart swoon, those pretty green eyes you want to stare into all day, those lips you were dying to kiss and taste. The way only he knows how to make you laugh when you're sad and the warm hugs you never want to break from. He is always real and honest with you, even if his thoughts are sometimes dark. The speckles of paint on his shirts and sometimes on his school uniform — which he always needed your help to clean —, the late nights sneaking in his dorm to talk about everything and nothing.

‘’Y/N! Are you listening?’’

You pulled yourself out of your thoughts, thankful for the color on your cheeks covering your natural flush. ‘’Sorry. What did you say?’’

‘’You were thinking about him, were you?’’ Enid teased, grinning like a teenage girl in a rom-com.

‘’I was not thinking about Xavier,’’ you denied.

She scoffed. ‘’Liar.’’ Enid held up two lipsticks, asking for your input. ‘’Should I do red or pink?’’

‘’Pink.’’

*

When you entered the room of flashing lights and buzzing music, all eyes turned to you.

All except Xavier’s.

His were too busy staring at the layered white tablecloths while Bianca was talking about god knows what. Before him was an empty glass, telling you enough about the fun he was not having.

You bit back a smile, secretly happy to see he was not having fun with his date.

‘’Ohh, look, Xavier’s there,’’ Enid pointed out in the least subtle way, grabbing your arm and looking right in his direction. ‘’He polished up nice.’’

He was wearing an all white suit with a thin black bowtie and his hair was pulled back, showing off his features. You sucked in a breath, feeling butterflies in your stomach. He looked so handsome — gorgeous.

‘’I’m gonna get us some drinks.’’ You tore your eyes from Xavier and went to the table where the punch was. With luck, someone will have spiked it and it’ll give you some liquid courage for later.

As you were filling the second glass with blue smoking punch, someone came up to your side. By the whiff of their cologne, you knew immediately who it was.

‘’I thought you weren’t coming.’’

His eyes raked up and down your body and you held back a smirk. Your plan was working, the dress was working. It was nothing too revealing. You wanted to get Xavier’s attention, not get sent to your room by Principal Weems.

‘’I changed my mind.’’ You grabbed your other drink and handed Xavier the second one. ‘’Yeti-tini?’’

It was for Enid, but oh well.

Xavier accepted it with a soft dimpled smile and brought the glass to his lips. ‘’You look…’’ He swallowed hard and lowered his eyes while searching for his words. ‘’Beautiful.’’ A light flush covered his cheeks, quickly correcting himself. ‘’I mean, you look great.’’

‘’Thanks.’’ You brought your drink to your lips to hide your smile. ‘’Shouldn’t you be with your date? Bianca seems a little lonely.’’

He glanced at Bianca who was sitting alone at a table, swishing her drink in its glass out of boredom, then drew his gaze back to you. ‘’I’m not allowed to come and say ‘hi’ to my best friend?’’

Best friend. You tried not to wince.

Xavier Thorpe was the king of mixed signals. A minute ago, he was complimenting you and looking at you the way a platonic friend wouldn’t, and now he was calling you his best friend. The words hurt like a knife in your chest.

You shifted your eyes to the dancefloor and faked a gasp. ‘’I gotta go. There’s a girl code emergency. Someone is flirting with Enid and she’s giving me the help signal.’’

‘’Oh. Okay. I…I’ll see you later, then.’’

You walked away with your drink and searched for Enid. The night was off to a bad start.

*

Eventually, you got dragged to the dancefloor. Most songs the DJ was playing were normie modern pop, but you tried to not cringe too much. One would think a school like Nevermore would be into more unorthodox music, but they can’t escape the radio hits.

You were dancing with Enid and Yoko, letting go and having fun between girls when you caught sight of an upset Bianca leaving the dance and Xavier sulking in a chair. Abandoning the girls, you snaked through the crowd of students and made your way to him.

‘’I know you are Nevermore’s tortured artist, but you’re allowed to have fun once in a while. Come dance.’’ You extended your hand, waiting for him to take it.

Xavier raised an eyebrow. ‘’With you?’’

‘’Yes. I promise I won’t step on your feet.’’

He accepted your hand with a sigh and you pulled him to the dancefloor as a better song came up. A sliver of a smile curled on his lips as your back was turned to him, hidden from you.

You swayed close to him, moving your arms, hips and shoulders to the music. Xavier chuckled and followed automatically, dancing as he pleased and fully letting go. He pulled silly moves and even made you twirl, making you both laugh. A perpetual smile etched itself on your face and pieces of hair were coming loose from Xavier's hair tie, forgetting about the people around you.

The music switched to a slow song and you both stood there, not knowing what to do. His eyes flicked down to you, looking at you in a way he never had before. You've never been nervous around Xavier before. He was your comfort person, the only one who you could be unapologetically yourself with. But the way he was looking at you sent nervous butterflies in your stomach.

Your hands shaking from holding back from him. You didn't want him like a best friend anymore. You didn’t want him to touch you like a best friend anymore.

As if he had heard your thoughts, Xavier stepped closer, so close not even a sheet of paper could pass between you. So close you could smell his cologne, a mix of pine notes with a softer undernote. His hands found the courage to rest on your waist, his gentle touch sending electricity through your body. ‘’Is this okay?’’ he asked, gulping as his eyes bore into you, the close proximity making his hands sweaty and causing his heart to pick up.

You nodded. It was more than okay.

‘’Xavier?’’

He hummed, his green eyes shimmering from the mirrorballs hung to the ceiling, reflecting the party lights. You curled your fingers around one of the tails of Xavier’s bowtie, wishing you could undo it and attach your lips to his neck and fastening yourself to him like a stitch.

‘’There's something I've been wanting to tell you for a while.’’ He motioned for you to go ahead as you swayed to the slow music. You took a last breath and allowed the words to leave your lips. ‘’I...I don't want us to be friends anymore. I can't keep pretending I'm okay with us being just friends when all I think about when we're together is closing the space between us and kissing you.’’

‘’Like this?’’

Xavier leaned down and when his lips touched yours, all pieces fell into place. You melted into him and slid your hands around his neck, as if you were afraid he would break the kiss and run.

You were both out of breath when you pulled away, eyes filled with desire.

‘’I take back what I said earlier, you look fucking beautiful tonight,’’ Xavier said, his mouth overing over yours. ‘’And that dress— It's killing me.’’ His hands moved up and down your sides while his eyes stalled on the swell over your breasts. He was trying to be respectful with all the chaperon professors around, but his pants were getting a little tight.

There was absolutely no subtlety in the way you and Xavier snuck out of the room to go to his dorm. Your red dress stood out like a sore thumb among all the white.

Your dress hit the floor the moment you made it to Xavier’s dorm and remained there all night. After all, it was the reason you had bought it.

—

Xavier Thorpe taglist: @sofiaadler @partyfly @hoodforcalum @thelilacmourning @ellessecretobsession @su-alteza-emia @achoo---uu @not-leaprvt @xaviersgf @peterparkerdilf @roadworkaheadisurehopeitdoes @dragon-chica @coldtacozinepanda @wrldofsage @eddiemunsonsluvrrr @capriaura @officialsaturn @babyfiva @maevaomizzolo @kelloggs-world @whosljt @ajpanda181 @belovedrey @emerycrt @elizabitchsshit @heaven-hiding @lilithlikestoread @est-liber @moonisu @dessxoxsworld @parker-nite @bellblake121890 @vesperazhier @kaldurahms-lover @beeebo234 @nephilimsss @mayuphoenix @sweetheartlizzie07 @watermelon-18 @snixx2088 @555stargirl555 @robinscardigan @chumchum19 @lilttblog @aphex2winn @heizenka @mystargirl-interlude @hwrtsiren @babygirljay20 @wildflowerlyss @strangersomeone @openfandoms @charlottelaffin @iheartmaddyperez @starless-starkov @ali-r3n

[bettyfrommars]

Handcuffs & Crab Rangoon

(also known as How I Met Your Mother)

playgirl!Eddie x Reader

By Request! From this ask, directly inspired by this delicious artwork by @sporelium (run don't walk if you haven't seen it yet) but also inspired by the 1995 Peter Steele Playgirl cover. Peter notoriously kept his joystick hard for most of the 6-7 hour shoot because he thought readers of the magazine would enjoy it more than if it were flaccid (I'm fine either way, but damn, thanks baby). wc: 4.3k

18+Only, mature content, smut, rockstar!Eddie, oral (f receiving), protected p in v, reader wears overalls, pet names, fingering, mention of Eddie's scars, accidental edging, sex on the job, sneaky sex, she/her is used once, no y/n, reader is a tough cookie, but Eddie is magic. It is the mid-90's.

Playgirl!eddie afterthoughts

---------

You’d been helping out a photographer for risqué magazine shoots as an assistant for almost 5 months now.  It was the fourth job you had just to keep yourself afloat while trying to live an independent life in LA. To make it in show business you had to be extremely talented, drop dead gorgeous, backed by generational wealth, or just plain lucky, and you were none of those.  So, you broke your back to make ends meet while taking night classes and working on the script you were writing with two other friends.

The studio loft on the second floor was an expansive space with windows overlooking the industrial district all along the wall.  Sasha, the photographer, stood adjusting her camera on the tripod, while the makeup artist touched up the rockstar you were working with that day, and Need You Tonight by INXS played low from the radio on a nearby shelf.  

You saw him from the back first; long, dark wavy hair hanging down over the white robe he wore to protect his modesty for the time being.  You noticed that his hands were strong and calloused as they hung at his sides.  June, the makeup artist, was on a step stool to blot his nose with powder and fix the crown of his hair.  

June saw you coming and introduced you, causing Eddie to turn on his heel, tightening the sash on his robe as he did.

You sucked in your bottom lip to hold back a whimper at the zing you felt when his warm hazelnut eyes met yours.  His full, soft lips parted in greeting, a long strand from his bangs bouncing on his eyelash, his gaze rolling over you from head to foot indulgently.

Of course, you’d heard of rock star Eddie Munson from Corroded Coffin. At one of your other jobs, a girl you worked with had his magazine cutouts taped to the inside of her locker.  Last year, he was Cher’s date to the Grammys.  He was getting ready to go on tour, and procuring tickets was all any of your friends could talk about.

But, goddamn, he was much better looking in person than any tabloid or tv show could've ever prepared you for, and the chemistry vibrating in the space between the two of you was palpable.  

“Eddie…Munson, you say?” You squinted, as if you were trying to place him, like the name sounded familiar but you didn’t know why while June fixed the back of his hair. “Football player, right?”

The tip of his tongue sipped out to wet his lips, curling one side of his mouth up in a half grin.  “I love a girl who knows her sports.”

There were a few loaded seconds there when the two of you just sank into a sexually charged stare-down, both unwilling to budge.  

Sasha called your name, snapping you out of it.  She came over to let Eddie know what your role was, and encouraged him to let you know if there was anything you could do to help him relax.  She finished explaining a few things to him while you brought over a glass of lemon water.  

Sasha walked away and he took a sip, keeping his eyes on you over the glass, smirking.

“What?” you mirrored the smirk.  “This will be such an easy job for me because I know you rockstars don’t have any problem taking your cocks out and being admired in public.”

“Oh, you know me, huh?” He challenged.

You worked your jaw, pussy clenching, wondering what he looked like out of his robe.  “You’re all the same, aren’t you? Arrogant, over-sexed, and too pretty for your own good.”

“Well, you got me on the pretty part,” he winked.  “But nah, I’m not a rockstar.  I’m just a small-town freak who got lucky and, this has all been fucking overwhelming to tell you the truth.”  Eddie was tall, with broad shoulders, and your mouth dried up a little at the tattoos on his forearms that peeked out from under the sleeve of the robe.

You took the glass from him when he was finished.  “We have the small town thing in common, at least,” you said with an incline of your head.

It was time to get started, but even as Sasha motioned him over, he paused next to you, so close that the ends of his hair grazed your shoulder.  “So, if I can’t get relaxed on my own, then that means you have to help me?”  He whispered it, but forcefully, so you could feel his warm breath on the side of your head.  You could smell the mix of spearmint and tobacco.

Keeping your eyes straight ahead, you swallowed hard as the woodsy spice of his scent hit your nostrils.  “I’ll do my best for you, Mr. Munson,” and then you dared to glance up, your breath hitching as he unfastened his robe and lowered it from his shoulders right in front of you, only a few feet away.  

You tried not to show emotion because you knew he was watching, but you closed your mouth to keep a yearning mew from escaping.  There were tattoos scattered around his defined muscles, but there were also fascinating scars like floral blooms along his neck, chest, and stomach. Your eyes ached to travel down to the V-shape that cut into his hips and the treasure below, but you refused to give him the satisfaction.  Not yet anyway.

You were just about to tell him he could keep the robe on until he was comfortable, but he threw the article of clothing over for you to catch.  “I’m ready as I’ll ever be.”

Half of the people Sasha photographed were too shy to take the robe off right away, and maybe Eddie would have hesitated in other circumstances, but you had a strange feeling he was doing this for you.  If Sasha wasn’t asking him to look at the camera, his eyes were always banking in your direction.  

“I think we should try the handcuffs,” Sasha said to the room, but mostly to you.  

You made your way over to where the props were, knowing that Eddie’s eyes were keeping pace, and playfully dangled the silver cuffs from your thumb and forefinger as you retrurned, wiggling your eyebrows; a gesture he was happy to return. 

“Front or behind?” You asked Sasha.

“Behind for now,” she answered.  “You okay with that Mr. Munson?”

“My god,” he chuckled, putting his hands behind his back for you to have easy access to the tender skin of his wrists.  “Call me anything but Mr. Munson.  Eddie is fine.”

You always tried to keep things very professional, but not only that—you’d been around so many naked bodies, they all started to look the same to you.  This was your job, and mostly it never even occurred to you to see the models in a lustful way..  You never let your eyes hover too long on the private parts of your clients; maybe just a glance and that was it.  But the job of fastening Eddie’s handcuffs had you taking in the firm structure of his ass like it was a visual last meal.  

You stroked your finger a few times in his palm.  “Is that too tight?” 

The combination of your touch and the way you whispered gave him chills in the best way possible and his fingers flexed, as if trying to reach out for you.  “I hope you have a key for these things,” he mumbled.

“I do,” you assured him.  “But I’m about to swallow it.”

“Hey,” he hushed over his shoulder before you could walk away.  “Should my dick be hard for this?”

You wanted to kiss his arm, you wanted to bite it.  Instead, you put your hands together and intertwined your fingers.  “Do you want it to be?”

Eddie lowered his chin, voice barely audible.  “Are you offering to help, sweetheart?

Sasha took a few more photos as he was, standing to the side, eyes flicking to where you stood behind Sasha’s shoulder.  When it was time for you to take the handcuffs off, Eddie stretched his hands, turning to face front. “No chick wants to look at a flaccid dick when they buy magazines like this,” he announced.  “Give me a second to…get ready? If you know what I mean?”

While Sasha and June went out for a smoke break, Eddie put his robe on, and headed for his private dressing room, but he paused in the door and turned to find you. His eyebrows popped up a few times,  motioned with his hand down low for you to follow him in.  You knew  you could lose your job for fornicating with Eddie during a photo shoot, but at that moment, you couldn’t have cared less.

Once you were in, Eddie closed the door and leaned back against it, his robe falling open.  He clutched a fist into the front of your overalls, pulling you closer.  Your fingertips feathered down the ridges of his scars, thumb caressing over his missing nipple, and he jutted his head forward to meet your mouth, but you were too fast, dropping to your knees to taste his cock, taking your job and his request a bit too seriously.  

“Wait,” Eddie sank his hand around your throat, guiding you back up to full height.  “Kiss me first,” he swiped the tip of his tongue across his bottom lip.  “And then you can kill me.”

While the tiny person in charge of your brain ran around inside your skull screaming, your  lips met his, tips of tongues introducing each other first, and then echoed moans, opening wide to take each other deeper.

“I know what will get me hard,” he told you in a breathy rush.  “Take these off,” he motioned to the overalls you were wearing.  “And sit on the counter.”

He walked forward so that you would back up, his hands supporting your waist.

You looked back at the counter top. “But we don’t have much time to—” 

“I don’t need much time,” he said, swatting a stool out of his way so it crashed to the ground.  “I want you in my mouth.”

You shivered and obeyed, unhooking your overalls, letting them fall to the floor.  You were in nothing but a tank top now, ass on the cool edge of the Formica, and he pulled your underwear down your legs, salivating and biting his lip as he did so. 

 “Fuuuuck, you are so wet,” He pushed your knees wider with his strong arms and sank his tongue into your glistening folds, flicking the nub a few times.  “Did you get this wet just for me? Hmmm?”

“Yes Eddie,” you whimpered, bracing yourself on the beige counter next to the vanity, watching him drag his chin all the way up your slit, and then pull and twist his tongue down, darting it into your hole.  His eyes met yours again, his mouth latching onto your sweet spot and sucking there.  You wrapped your legs over his shoulders and sunk your heels into his back.

His fingers dug into the meat at your hips, his mouth diving deeper, sucking in while his tongue flicked. He reached a hand down between his legs and started stroking himself, getting more and more turned at the way you were gasping and twitching.

You grabbed the top of his head.  “Fuckkk Eddie fuck just like that.”

His eyes were closed now while he devoured you, but the look on his face spoke of how seriously he took the task, rolling his tongue and working you in a way that made your eyelids flutter and a choke catch in your throat.

But then there came a knock at the door.  

It was Sasha, and thank god she didn’t try the doorknob because you hadn’t locked it in your frenzy to get on Eddie’s joystick.  . 

“Coming!” You shouted nervously, dropping to your feet, stepping into your underwear and then your overalls.  

Eddie sucked in his bottom lip, licking what was left of you from his mouth.  He caught your elbow as you were fastening the second clip.  “Can we finish this later?”

The way he asked it was almost shy, as if his face hadn’t just been between your thighs.  Meanwhile, your engorged pussy was soaking your underwear, begging to be finished.  You saw that his chin was still wet from your arousal and whisked some of it away with your thumb.

He bent to let his lips graze at your ear as he closed his robe. “I like the way you taste.”

Back out on the floor, you let Sasha know that Eddie was talking your ear off about something, but that he would be out any second.  Sasha and June exchanged a look, mostly in regards to the way the straps of your overalls were all twisted and buttoned wrong, but neither one of them addressed it.

When Eddie came out and took his robe off again, he was hard, rolling his big hand around the head a few more times as he got on the prop bed that was there for the next set.  There was a model named Cindy in lingerie there to be in the shots with him, and you felt a jealousy rise in you that didn’t make any sense.  It rose so hot in your gut while their mouths hovered inches apart, pretending they were about to kiss, that you had to look away.  Every so often, he’d glance over at you while he had his cock in his hand, determined to keep the beast hard, and you wondered if he was thinking about having his tongue inside of you.

Because, you were definitely thinking about it.  You took a little private time around the corner just to touch yourself through your denim, working your fingers at your core, wondering if you should just finish yourself off and be done with it just as Sasha finally called for another smoke break.

You tried not to be too obvious, casually strolling back to Eddie’s dressing room, making sure the model Cindy was comfortable and fetching her the sparkling water she asked for while Love Bites by Judas Priest played on the radio.

Eddie was already in there waiting, yanking you inside by the wrist so he could lock the door, planting hot, hungry kisses down along your neck. 

You dropped your overalls like they were on fire, caressing his hard length in a way that made him moan. “I need you so fucking bad,” you breathed, pulling your tank top up and over your head so that you could be flush with his skin, to feel the ridges of his scars.  “That last set was almost two hours,” you were still talking as he backed you further into the room.  “How is your cock still hard?”

His fingers slipped down through your folds and he hissed at the way you were dripping.  “Just the thought of this, sweetheart.”

There was a floral couch against the wall and when your calves met with it, you plopped down into the cushion and Eddie followed, knees to the wood floor, wrapping his arm around your thighs to take your sweet bud into his mouth again, teasing it with his nose first.

“Fuck fuck Eddie, I’m already so close,” you took a fistful of his beautiful hair, careful not to mess it up too bad and bucked against his mouth.  “You’re so good, I love it when your tongue fucks me.”

Your hole was clenching around nothing, needing more, and that was when two of his fingers slid in, the ones with the chunky metal rings, they stretched you out suddenly, making you curse with pleasure.  Eddie zig-zagged his tongue rapid fire over  your clit, groaning at the way your hole gripped his fingers.  His cock was leaking pre-cum and he thrust his hips into the couch as he felt your walls begin to ripple.

“Fuck Eddie, you’re gonna make me cum…so hard….” the orgasm seemed to snap your body in two, pulsing a waves of pleasure up your spine, making your mouth freeze open on a sharp inhale.  And then you were babbling, “cummincumming so hard, Eddie!”

“Turn over,” he demanded in a deep voice once you were able to catch your breath.  “I need to clean you up.”.

And so you got on your knees facing the wall and held onto the back of the couch, trembling at the way he spread your cheeks and lapped you up all along your drenched slit.

“We’re ready if you are!” Sasha called from out in the studio making you spin around.

“Oh shit,” you breathed, looking down at how swollen and ready his cock was.  “I can’t leave you like this.”

“I can wait, sweetheart,” he mumbled, standing to pull his robe back on and offer you his hand, tossing his hair back over his shoulder.

By the time the photo shoot was over, Eddie would’ve been edging his release for over 4 hours, and he didn’t seem phased at all about it.

It was time for the handcuffs again.  Eddie wanted a cigarette, and Sasha encouraged him to have it in a seat by the window and she’d get a few shots of him there.  He held his wrists close together in front of him while you secured the cool metal, his chocolate orbs fixed on your face.  He liked how your fingers quivered as you cuffed him, and his erection had finally softened enough to not be obnoxious, but it was still making your mouth dry up with desire.

He wanted to light the cigarette himself, so you passed him the lighter.  He spread his legs, hitching one heel up on the leg of the chair, exposing the patch of hair at the base of his cock and around his balls 

“That’s perfect,” Sasha told him, finger tapping on the shutter button, producing a blast of fast clicks..  

You glanced up at the clock, knowing your time with Eddie would be over soon.  Cindy the model could’ve gone home, but she’d decided to stay and wait to watch the rest of Eddie’s shoot, her eyes sparkling with lust.  Maybe she would be the one to get Eddie off and not you.  She was physically more what you assumed his “type” would be since, in your mind, all rock stars were the same.

You didn’t have to wonder for long which woman he’d rather fuck, because he was eyeballing you from across the room as he put his robe on and said a few last words to Sasha.  The dressing room door was hidden around the corner and down the hall, but you decided not to follow him straight in like you had the last two times; your carnal needs were making you sloppy.  This time, you went out into the stairwell to the back entrance and knocked, hoping he would get the hint because it only opened from the inside.  Eddie pushed it open with a hard metal clank, and then your hands were in his hair, and wordlessly the two of you fell into each other.  He was doing the work of unfastening your overalls while you were coherent enough to ask about condoms and he presented a string of them out of the pocket of his robe.

“You came prepared,” you stumbled over your clothes, yanking your shirt off as you went.

“Nah,” Eddie cocked his head.  “I had my gofer bring me these.  The guy is quick.” 

“How do you want me?” You kissed down his chest, flicking his one salty nipple with your tongue, making him groan.

He ripped one of the condoms off the pack and tore it open with his teeth, and then spat the paper edge out.  “I need to be able to see your face,” he crashed his nose against yours diving in for another kiss.

“Sit,” you told him, urging him back into the wooden chair in the corner of the room.  It was right next to a full length mirror so he could watch you fuck him from the side if he wanted to. There were no arms on the chair, and he complied, licking his lips, eager for whatever you had in mind while he rolled the condom on.

You kicked  your leg over him like you were mounting your motorcycle and sat your hungry, soaking hole down on the tip of his cock.  Eddie took hold of your hips and guided you down, releasing one long moan as you went.  You whined, coming down flush with his lap, his cock stretching you out in a way no one ever had before, settling yourself first before you began to move.  You pushed up from the balls of your feet, riding him, and Eddie clamped a hand onto each of your ass cheeks, creating a rhythm, using his strong arms to help lift and lower you.

Your foreheads came together as you moved, hard nipples grazing his chest. You watched him grit his teeth and gasp.  “Damn, you’re so tight.  I’m close, I’m so fucking…close,” he bit out.  

Your clit rubbed against his patch of hair as you worked, and it wasn’t long before you began to hiccup with the contraction of your own release.  Never in your life had you cum this soon and this close together.  “You’re gonna make me cum again, oh my god.”

“Yeah?” He pulled his head back.  “Look at me.”

You met his eyes as you bounced, his hips snapping up to meet you every time you bottomed out.

“Yes,” you said breathlessly, finding the yearning in his stare too much to handle.  “Like, right now, right…fuck, Eddie I’m cumming!” Your head dropped to his shoulder while the tremors rolled through you, walls squeezing his cock, making his toes curl and his hips jerk erratically, the chair legs squeaking from his weight.

He held you flush to him, his release hot and plentiful; so much so, he might’ve worried about the integrity of the condom if he hadn’t been so pussy drunk on the way your hole was still clenching him like a fist.  You locked your chest to his and he caged you with his arms, locking you there.

Your knees threatened to turn to butter and betray you as you dismounted the ride of your life, both of you finding the footing to scramble around and retrieve your clothes. Eddie could stay in the dressing room as long as he wanted, but you? You were only a shell of the employee you normally were that day and you feared that Sasha was probably coming to look for you at that moment, ready to tell you to take a hike.

Eddie pulled his shirt down over his head, adjusting it over his jeans and flipped his hair from out of the collar. You snapped the first buckle on your overalls and gave him a tilt of your head. “Hey stranger, I almost didn’t recognize you with clothes on,” and then you fixed yourself in the mirror quickly before planting one more kiss on him on your way to bolt for the door.

“Hey, wait,” he called out, making you turn around. “Is that it? This is goodbye?”

Eddie Munson was a beautiful rockstar. Eddie Munson was in music videos on MTV. Eddie Munson could have any woman he wanted in the world, single or taken, and so no---you hadn’t expected more to come from this. You thought maybe he had a new fuck for every day of the week and you just happened to fall into his lap at the right time when he was bored and had some time to kill.

“Did you need anything else?” You asked it in your professional assistant voice, your work voice, and put your hands in your pockets to patiently wait.

He sat down on the couch to put his Converse on, absorbed in his task as he spoke to you. “My hotel is just up the street. Are you busy tonight? We could have dinner. Anything you want, my guys will get it for us.”

“I’m busy tonight,” you lied.

“What about tomorrow?” He pushed, tying the next shoe. “I wanna hear more about this small town you grew up in. I’ve really been missing home lately.”

You softened. “I refuse to believe you are anything but a spoiled city boy.”

He stood to his full height, stretching his chest, and hooked his thumbs into his belt loops, giving you a shrug and a familiar smirk. “Just think about all the ways I could prove you wrong if you came to hang out with me tonight. I might even surprise you.”

You got all awkward for a bit, fighting with yourself over why you weren’t on your knees begging for this man. Regardless of your silence, he found an old receipt for a tin of mini mart pretzels in his pocket and wrote his room number and hotel on it.

Passing it to you pinched between his two fingers, he added without meeting your gaze, “I’d really like to see you again.”

But then Sasha was calling for you, needing help with equipment, and you were scurrying out of the room with your heart in your throat.

You paused with your hand on the doorknob. “Crab Rangoon?”

Eddie scoffed. “What did you call me?” He was jutting his arms up into the sleeves of his leather jacket when you favored him a glance over you shoulder.

You swiveled to face him and made a circular gesture with your hand as if the implication was universally understood. “If there happens to be some crab Rangoon at your hotel tonight, I will stop by.”

Eddie’s face was blank, totally unreadable for a few seconds, and then a smile teased at the corners of his mouth, crept across his face, and jumped to his eyes. He gave a nod, “crab Rangoon it is then.”

---------

[cripple-woe]

Funny thing about being fat is that everything gets expensive (Small cry for help is at the end if you wanna skip the sob story).

My friend and I are both saving up for a wheelchair, because I personally don’t want to go through the wheelchair assessment service because it will take months and they’ll just ignore me because I’m fat, and because he doubts they’ll approve him anyways.

A wheelchair for his weight class, not overweight, is around £100.

A wheelchair for my weight class (250lbs) is around £200-400.

I cannot lose weight, I have hormone conditions that mess with my insulin and make it practically impossible, even with metformin and other insulin medications, to drop a single pound. I’ve starved myself, I’ve had under 500kal a day before now consistently because of atypical eating disordered habits and it has done nothing! They also won’t give me weight loss meds that work. So.

I’m not getting commissions, I don’t want to ask for kindness from y’all because my parents have given me more than enough complexes about accepting help and they’d probably freak out if they ever knew. So I’m just. Struggling. It hurts. I’m in so much fucking pain, man.

—————————————————

So… here’s a depressing reminder that my commissions are open. I can draw death and gore, doesn’t bother me. I’m happy to draw artistic nudity. I’m pretty cheap for an illustrator by industry standard. My extended diploma work is currently being graded, so I will soon be a certified illustrator, so I promise I am professional. I’ve been taught how to do commissions properly and am used to clients. My turnover is very quick, and most clients get their piece in a week or less as I usually have no queue.

If you can’t afford my prices I’m also currently ready to hear you out for a discount request.

Please consider me if you need or want artwork at the moment. Please tag or pass this along to accounts you think might be interested in my work or just spreading the word. My commission money will be going into a pool dedicated to purchasing a wheelchair when I find one at the right price, first or second hand.

Here’s my Carrd.

[bgomtori]

☆ seasons - c.bg

synopsis - he was her muse, she was his solace, however what if his emotions got to him for the worst to happen?

-> inspired by the webtoon seasons of blossom, hamin's flower, a bit of dongchae's flower too if you squint :)

-> muse! beomgyu x artist! reader

-> right person not enough time, highschool au, strangers to lovers, fluff, angst with happy ending, secret relationship

-> note! rlly important,, attempted suicide, abusive parents and sh mentions so pls scroll away if youre uncomfortable. slightly ooc beomgyu. i cried at hamin's flower, i love this webtoon sm. also this is going to be more lengthier compared to my other oneshots so enjoy!!

he was rather popular among the cohort, everyone liked him. he was attractive, smart, and had an overall fun personality. everyone knew who beomgyu was, girls swooning over him, confessing their love for him. guys always hanging around him, wanting to have a chat with him every now and then. the whole school knew how cool he was, how high his reputation was, everyone liked him, there was nothing to dislike about beomgyu. that's how you know him even if you guys weren't from the same class.

you, on the other hand, were quiet, barely interacted with the people around you. you'd always stay out of drama in order to protect yourself. during breaks and lunch, you always saw yourself finding solace in the art room, chewing down on your premade lunch while painting whatever was on your mind.

first encounter ༘⋆✿

this day in particular, was one where it basically changed your life. as you mixed the paints on your palette to get a shade of your liking, the door suddenly opened. numerous thoughts rushed through your mind, did someone finally find out your hiding spot? is a teacher going to scold you for using the art room? you bit your lip, thinking of the multiple possibilities that may occur. the sound of the sliding door closing made you peek your eyes out to assess the situation, only to realise that beomgyu, the one everyone liked, was in the same room as you.

"finally, some peace, these people can't seem to stop following me around jeez." beomgyu scoffed in annoyance, grabbing the seat closest to him, plopping down on it exhaustedly. you peered at beomgyu with confusion, he doesn't seem to notice your presence just yet. you continued to hide yourself, watching him warily while he continued to grumble to himself.

just to your luck, your leg accidentally kicked the easle, causing it to drop. you mentally cursed to yourself trying to prevent the canvas from falling on the ground. beomgyu heard the chaos happening on your end, and immediately turned his head over to find the source of loud sound, only the find you panicking over the fact that you got found out.

"how long have you been in here?" beomgyu interrogated you as if you were a wanted criminal. nothing could come out of your mouth, you looked like a deer caught in headlights. beomgyu chuckled to himself, moving towards you, taking a seat beside you.

"i'm beomgyu, you?" he placed a hand out infront of you, wanting to shake your hand. you glanced at his hand, then his face, still skeptical, what if he is luring you into a trap to get caught by the teachers. unbelievable!

"i'm yn.." you mumbled, loud enough to be heard by beomgyu, taking him hand in yours, giving it a nice, and firm shake. the awkward tension filled up the atmosphere, beomgyu scratched his cheek, slightly nervous about the silence between the two of you. you sat there, eating onigiri as if he wasn't there, continuing to paint your artwork. beomgyu stared at the way you carried the brush, with each stroke, a mesmerising work of art unfolded infront of beomgyu.

"you stay here during your spare time?" beomgyu asked, sipping on the extra pack of milk he was carrying in his bag earlier. you hummed in response, "yea, this is my place to enjoy the peace and quiet." a bit of sarcasm directed towards beomgyu for interrupting your tranquility. beomgyu remained silent for a while, finishing his milk packet, placing it on one of the tables around the both of you.

"the teachers allow you in here?" beomgyu continued questioning you, he found you quite interesting for not fawning over him, and asking him stupid questions like what everyone else does. he felt safe around you despite knowing you for just a few minutes. "only my art teacher, he knows how much i enjoy drawing, so he gave me the keys to this room. only if i promised not to get caught by any teacher or student. but, you suddenly came in here, man i should have locked the door." you grumbled the last part out, in slight bitterness. however you didn't really ming beomgyu's presence as long as he doesn't go snitching on you, you were fine with it.

"then you, why did you suddenly barge in here without a warning?" it was your turn to interrogate him, usually no one found interest in the art room, so you found it suspicious. beomgyu looked nervous, was he really about to tell a girl he just got to know his secret. he pressed his lips together, forming something similar to a straight line, still hesitant. you noticed his silence, and was about to reassure him that you weren't forcing him to tell you.

"it's just that my supposed friends are practically assholes who just want popularity. i just want to get away from them." beomgyu sighed, his eyes flickering to whatever's interesting outside the window. "promise me that you tell anyone about my secret or i'll complain to the school about your special treatment in the art room." beomgyu warned, turning to face you to show how serious he was with this.

"ok, ok promise." you giggled, finding his serious look funny. beomgyu's eyebrows furrowed, "why are you laughing." you covered your mouth, preventing yourself from giggling any further.

"nothing, just found it funny." you replied, your focus going back to your uncompleted canvas. beomgyu pouted, resting cheek on the table infront of him as he continued to watch you paint the background of your artwork. "oh! right, can you model for me? i really need a reference for this piece.. i need to work on my realism, please." you pleaded beomgyu. beomgyu's eyes narrowed, reluctant to do your request, however he found himself shifting his seat to face your direction. strange. whenever his friends asked him to do something, he'd normally refuse, however he was comfortable with your requests. how odd.

"is this ok?" he asked, he rested his cheek on the palm of his hand, looking at you like a puppy wandering on the streets. you gave him a thumbs up before turning your attention back to your canvas, picking up the pencil from the table beside you. your head would occassionally pop up from the side of your canvas, peering at beomgyu's facial features, taking them in while your hands does the wonders of sketching out his pretty features. beomgyu's facial structure was perfect, paired with his soft fluffy brown hair resting neatly above his eyes. you could tell that he was growing out his hair especially with the ends of his hair touching the back of the collar of his uniform.

beomgyu watched you squint your eyes with pure concentration whenever you'd look at his features and back at your canvas to make sure they matched. he noticed the way your tongue protruding from your lips slightly, your eyes basically fired up with determination to get the details correct. he felt himself smile to himself, watching your every move.

"tell me about yourself, beomgyu. i don't want to sketch in plain silence." you suddenly requested, beomgyu was taken aback, this was the first time someone actually wanted to understand and know him as a person, and not just for his looks and academics. beomgyu licked his dry lips before opening his mouth, maybe he could trust you with this information, "hmm, you know, even if this is the first time i've ever met you. i feel like i can just be myself around you. for the first time, i don't need to have a fake persona to make a person understand me."

you felt your mouth go dry, he left you tongue tied, you didn't expect him to say something like that, you felt your heart rate accelerating– he made you feel special, important. "wow.. i didn't take you as a two-faced person." you joked with him, beomgyu sneered at your remark, feeling the tips of his ears turn red, well you weren't particularly wrong..

"how long do we have left." you asked, rushing your final detail of the sketch. beomgyu switched on his phone, flipping the screen around to show you. 5 minutes left, wow that was quick. you turned the easle towards beomgyu, showing your masterpiece.

"how is it?" you inquired proudly, you were nervous about the sudden silence coming from beomgyu's end. you slowly opened your eyes to see him taking a picture of your artwork, your eyes widened, "hey, it's not even done. don't take a picture just yet." however, beomgyu smirked at you, showing signs of not wanting to delete the picture. he slowly backed up towards the door, pausing as you looked at him in confusion.

"remember our promise ok?" beomgyu reminded, sticking out his pinky, you looked up at him, cocking your eyebrow at him, before intertwining your pinkies to lock the promise. beomgyu smiled at your gesture, "i'll see you soon." waving at you one last time before heading out of the art room. you stared at the shut door, still puzzled from what just occurred. you hurriedly packed your things before leaving the art room to go for your next class.

subsequent meetings ༘⋆✿

the door slid open again, you looked up in curiousity, only to be puzzled to see beomgyu standing there, quietly shutting the door. "you're here again?" you sighed, once again your peace was disrupted. beomgyu laughed, "can't i come here to enjoy the peace as well?" you grimaced at him, turning your head back to the canvas that was on the table, struggling to place it properly on the easle. beomgyu quickly stood behind you, leaning down to help you fix it. you felt your breath hitch, you could feel how close he was to you as he positioned the canvas perfectly for you. beomgyu took a seat beside you, his head on the table, turned towards your direction, watching you squeeze each of your desired coloured paints onto the palette.

"do you not have any other friends?, do you, well.. get outcasted or something? should i help you?" beomgyu randomly muttered out, you felt yourself pause, your head turning to face him, "what do you mean?" completely confused about what he's saying, the back of your neck feeling warm. is he assuming that you have no friends since you always hang around the art room.. beomgyu shrugged his shoulder, staring off into the distance. to beomgyu, he envied you, you get to enjoy your own solitude in the art room, away from the loud chaos happening in the main areas of the school. he's always surrounded by people, constantly blabbering in his ears about different topics that he isn't interested in, he often had to tune them out, or even cut them off to have some silence. even at home, he can't have a place where he could be alone and happy. his parents are constantly shouting, yelling at him to do better. pressurising him to constantly get good grades for every single test, even one mistake makes them go ballistic.

"i did have a friend, but she moved away 2 weeks later. i don't really socialise with the people in my class, so.." you hesitated to continue, not knowing how to complete your sentence. beomgyu smiled at you with adoration, maybe, just maybe he can find some solace within you. whenever you were painting, or just doing anything related to art, you'd look serene. beomgyu found you calming, only you could calm his nerves down that easily.

"cute." beomgyu uttered out, it slipped out of his mouth. you were stunned, a soft 'huh' left your mouth. confused, yet flustered at the same time, your cheeks warmed up at the sudden compliment. beomgyu gave you a boyish grin, straightening his back, stretching his tense muscles at the same time.

"hm, how about this, we make this our meeting place, but outside of here, pretend like we don't know each other. i don't want you to get unnecessary attention from my 'friends'." beomgyu offered, his request was odd. however, you still accepted it, you somehow enjoyed his presence around you. you've only known him for a while, but how does one already break down your walls that easily?

"that's a deal then." beomgyu smirked at you, his pinky intertwining with yours again, making another promise with you. "i'll see you around yn!" waving goodbye to you with a big smile on his face, heading out of the art room. you were slightly touched with how much he tried to create a bond with you, it was cute of him, maybe you'd actually look forward to lunch time now.

everyday, without a fail, beomgyu would enter the art room, closing the door immediately to not attract any suspicion. everyday, he entered the room, the relationship between both of you blossomed. you found yourself growly more fond of him. he felt the same way, he was drawn to you in some way or another, you weren't like the other people in school who would always stick their noses into other people's business. he knew that he could allow you into his heart. he knew that maybe it's possible to try something new with you. you had mini art lessons for beomgyu, you noticed his special talent for art, not only did was he a model student, he could draw well too, that pulled your heart strings.

in the art room, from teaching him how to paint a scenary, to conversations about each other's personal life. leaning on the edge of a table, beomgyu would subconsciously lace his fingers with yours, his head laying on your shoulder, telling you about how tiring it was to deal with his fake friends. you could only try your best to comfort him, since you didn't know exactly how he felt. his thumb would occassionally rub your knuckles, making your heart race.

despite all these secret interactions you two have, you would walk past beomgyu, not initiating any conversation with him, only glancing up at him, he would do the same, locking eyes with you, his hands intentionally rubbing past yours before walking away with his group of friends. thus, you decided to tone down your overwhelming feelings for beomgyu in order not to get too affected by it. therefore, when you saw beomgyu sitting in the art room, a tear dripping down his face, you were concerned, worried, you didn't really know what to do. so the best thing you did was pretend like you didn't notice beomgyu crying.

beomgyu noticed how flustered you were, a light-hearted giggle came out of his mouth, "i'm fine, so don't go anywhere. just stay here." upon his request, you sat infront of him, your eyes filled with concern. "why were you crying?" you asked, beomgyu looked out of the window, the afternoon glow luminating his face, his tear stained cheeks now more obvious, his damp eyelashes fluttering prettily. he was heaven-sent.

"summer break's coming, that means i'll have to attend summer school, and not be allowed to use the art room.." trailing off his words, "i also like watching you draw, so i guess that contributes to the factor." beomgyu confessed. your hands were clammy, did you hear that correctly? you felt yourself blush, cheeks warming up.

"how about during summer break you come with me to the art academy i attended for a tour?" you invited. beomgyu immediately turned to face you, the tip of his ears turning red, you practically asked him out. "sure.." he agreed, his hands quickly grabbing his phone from his pocket, typing in something quickly. he showed you his screen, contactlist. oh, he wanted your number. you took his phone from his, placing it on your lap before passing your own device to him, wanting him to give you his contact as well. both of you typed in your numbers in each other's phone before returning it back.

"i'll text you the date?" you say, tilting your head slightly. beomgyu uttered a quick, 'ok', coming down from the shelf he was conveniently sitting on. he bidded you goodbye, heading for his next, leaving you alone with your own thoughts. you turned on your phone, seeing the contact name, 'beomgyu :D' appearing on the notification board. 'i'll see you on the tour day itself :)' without knowing, you smiled to yourself, replying to his message while walking towards your classroom.

rain ༘⋆✿

maybe it was fate, maybe an invisible string was attached to the both of you to find each other. it has been a while since the day you two went out for the tour around your art academy, you've introduced him to the art studio you always go to after school. you and beomgyu made it your second hangout spot, away from everyone, only you, him, and your art director, but that didn't really matter. you two were closer than ever, telling each other about your secrets, ranting to each other about everything, basically attached by the hip.

school started again after the long summer break, the both of you went back to pretending like you didn't know about each other's existence. you ended classes earlier than him, since you were in the art stream. beomgyu on the other hand, he had lessons all the way till 4, as he was in the top class, which has more subjects compared to a normal senior year class, even if he wanted to skip lessons to spend more time with you, he can't, his parents were another issue. if his parents found out that he pulled out of his cram school, and went to your art studio with the funded money, who knows what would happen to him.

you stood near the entrance of the school's main doors, waiting for him to go to the art studio together, noticing that the sky was overcast, yet there was no wind whatsoever. the humidity and heat was getting to you, tying your hair in hopes of cooling yourself down. suddenly you felt something cold being placed at the back of your neck, you shrieked in fear, only to realise that beomgyu was standing behind you with a chilled can of pocari, placing it on the top of your head, giving it to you.

"sorry to keep you waiting." beomgyu apologised, peeping his head out of the sheltered doorway to check the weather, it was going to rain. he turned to you as you chugged down the can of pocari as if it was your last drink.

"oh? you tied your hair, huh? didn't you let it loose just now?" his eyes squinting at you, you felt flustered under his gaze, "i was waiting for you, and it was really humid, so i tied my hair!" you retorted, your lips forming into a pout. "hmm, for sure. you look cuter with your hair tied up anyways." beomgyu teased, his smirk rubbing you off. you smacked his shoulder, while he laughed at you.

just a few moments after, the sky was completely dark, droplets of rain pouring down from the sky immediately. you looked out at the sky, slightly happy about the sudden downpour, you loved the rain, it was relaxing. just listening to the sounds of rain droplets falling and hitting the concrete floor was soothing to you.

"the rain makes the summer air so much more suffocating." beomgyu grumbled beside you, about to grab his umbrella, however you stopped him. "let's go! this is the best way to feel freedom." you giggled, holding beomgyu's hand to pull him out into the rain. your bright, radiant smile made beomgyu flush, he usually hated the rain, let alone play in it, but it was different when it was with you.

"if you're going to grab onto my hand, at least do it properly." beomgyu mumbled, his fingers making it's way to intertwine with yours. "even so, this is more fun than i thought." beomgyu admitted, you beamed even more after hearing that, you hands squeezing his as you jumped into puddles, running around in the rain with him. after that fun, eventful journey, you two finally arrived at the art studio, greeting your art director with both your hairs' dripping, clothes stuck to your skin.

"oh dear! come, take some of my clothes, i'll go wash and dry these for you." the art director sighed, tossing her clothes onto the couch for you and beomgyu to change into. you burst out in laughter when you saw beomgyu, sitting on the couch, waiting for you, the clothes were too small for him. he glared at you, "shut up, sit here with me." beomgyu grumbled, patting the seat next to him, you obediently went beside him. the both of you shared the blanket, warming yourselves up.

"hmm, you know, whenever i'm with you, i get more talkative. usually i'm uncomfortable with such things, but why is it ok when i'm with you?" beomgyu said, leaning his head to his hand, looking straight into your eyes.

"oh, i hear a lot from my friends that i seem harmless." you joked, laughing to yourself, beomgyu smiled along with you, his eyes softened as he admired your pretty smile, and rosy cheeks.

"i think i know what they mean. but it's more like..." beomgyu trailed, trying to find a word to describe it.

"what? you're gonna tease me again, aren't you?" you scoffed, knowing that he loves joking around with you, he enjoyed looking at your angry look, it was cute.

"you're lovable?" your eyes widened in confusion, your cheeks flushing to a light hue a red, nothing came out of your mouth, you were speechless. beomgyu noticed your reaction, pink dusting his cheeks, the tip of his ears turning red. you laughed at him, pointing out how flustered he was.

"you make me like this yn." beomgyu pulled on his ears, in attempt to hide them, finally lifting his head up from the palm of his hand to look at your better. he inched closer to you, faces just centimeters away from one another, his mind clouded with thoughts of you, your lips, everything about you, "tell me if you hate it ok?" asking for consent.

"i don't.. hate it." you reassured him. beomgyu's lips tugged upwards before closing the gap between the two of you. you tasted like vanilla, probably from the lipbalm you were before school, he wanted more but was afriad that you would feel uncomfortable, pulling away after awhile. the kiss was short but pure. a small, 'ah' coming out of your mouth, feeling slightly disappointed that it ended.

beomgyu leaned towards you, whispering into your ear, "by the way, that was my first kiss." hearing that shocked you, he has never kissed anyone before? you were his first. "me too.." you trailed off, nervously glancing around the art studio. "it was pretty obvious." beomgyu chuckled as you turned your head towards him, your cheeks burning further, "huh how!? what do you m-"

"i'm back kids!" the art director interrupted your sentence, holding onto a basket with your uniforms. you and beomgyu turned towards her with red faces, she looked shocked and apologised, leaving your uniforms on the counter before continuing to mind her own business. the two of you turned back to each other and giggled. maybe beomgyu would start liking the rain that he had always hated.

radiant ༘⋆✿

"is everyone clear on this? this is how your art projects will be evaluated this semester." everybody groaned, the grading system was even more strict than usual. "oh right, i heard that your class chose face painting for this year's school festival. yn you're good at drawing, so you can help the others.." everyone turned to you while you blinked open your eyes, you were dead asleep. you didn't hear anything you teacher just said. your classmates laughed as your tablemate filled you in on what was happening, you came to your senses and just nodded in agreement to what your teacher said.

"perfect, class is dismissed now." you heaved a sigh of relief, saying a quick goodbye to your classmates, making your way to the art room. while walking up the flight of stairs, you overheard a group of people talking bad about beomgyu, they obviously couldn't tell that their volume was loud enough for people to eavesdrop on them. you felt a familiar presence creeping up behind you, you turned around, looking at beomgyu with concern, is this what he goes through all the time? beomgyu placed a finger on his lips, brushing past you as he made his way towards the group.

your eyes lingered on beomgyu's silhouette, worry crashes over. is he really ok with his friends talking shit about him behind his back.. your eyebrows knitted together, pulling your phone out of your skirt pocket as soon as you entered the art room.

yn★: are you ok?

beom:> : yea don't worry about me.

im almost there, wait for me yeah? read

upon hearing the door shut behind you, your head snapped towards the direction. beomgyu gave you the same old carefree smile he'd always wear on his face as if nothing happened. you walked towards him, tugging him into a hug. beomgyu was stiff but slowly melted under your touch, using his height to his advantage, he placed his chin atop of your head, his hands rubbing your back, consolling you.

"yn, you don't need to worry about me too much 'kay?" his gentle voice reassured you. maybe he was too used to it. "but if it bothers you too much, you can tell me." your head tilted up, doe eyes looking up at him. beomgyu nodded to your request, patting your head as he pulled away, how could he say no?

"right, my class is doing face painting for this years festival, and i kinda got forced into it.. so if you can, please visit us." you exclaimed, an excited smile appearing on your face. beomgyu's eyes softened, perhaps it was finally time for you to be under the limelight.

weeks flew by quickly, the school's festival was finally here. your class was bustling, each and every one of you scrambled around your class, setting up the props, and rearranging the tables. you on the other hand, was dragging a heavy bag of washable facepaints and brushes up to your class, your teacher must really enjoywatching you suffer. you were that your legs were going to fumble when you entered the class, beads of sweat trickling dowm your forehead as if you ran a marathon.

"wow, she really gave us a lot of materials, thanks for bringing them up yn!" your classmate patted your back, rummaging through the variety of brushes and paints, picking each different one up. you smiled at them, giving them a quick thumbs up, can they not tell that you basically went through hell bringing these up the stairs, this was even worse than deadlifting at a gym.

"yn! come here, help us paint our faces first before everyone else comes! we wanna be the first ones to experience your facepainting." your friend shouted for you, you went to where they were, sitting down on where you were supposedly stationed at. you carefully painted each of their requests right on their cheekbone, under their eyes. all of your classmates were amazed at your skill, you were able to draw from scratch, something they can't do.

"now do yours!" your classmate exclaimed, her phone camera placed infront of your, as if it was a mirror. you gave it some thought, finally deciding to draw a bear on your cheek, beomgyu's favourite animal, it even looks like him. you smiled to yourself, proud of your final work. you turned your cheek towards your classmates, showing it off, everyone gaped in astonishment, some giving you a thumbs up.

"ok guys, sorry to ruin your fun, but people are about to start coming here, so please get ready." your teacher coughed out to gain your attention, everyone quickly went to their station, a few grabbing the predecorated board to walk around the school to promote your class's activity. you rest your head on the palm of your hand, waiting for the students to arrive at at your classroom. multiple students came rushing in, they were excited to have their faces painted, especially by one of the best artists in the school. multiple requests were shouted at you as you tried calming them down, "one by one please.." you felt small, but you were happy that people were finally recognising your work and appreciating you as a person.

"you seriously want to do face painting?" a voice echoed through the hallways, only to be shushed by his group of friends. you recognised the brown messy hair, along with his converse shoes almost immediately. beomgyu came to see you, you smiled to yourself, your eyes darted back to the student you were still working on as he made his way towards you, his friends following behind him like minions.

"it's so cute, thank you so much yn!" the girl quickly thanked, her eyes sparkling with pure joy, admiring the art you drew on her cheek. your lips curved upwards, proud of yourself. without even realising, beomgyu had already sat infront of you, waiting for you to speak. you cleared your throat, out of pure anxiousness. "what design would you like to have?" he pondered to himself, humming while tapping his chin, "a hamster." your heart skipped a beat, it was one of your favourite pets, he even told you that you looked like a hamster before. he definitely got the inspiration from the bear on your cheek.

you dipped your paintbrush into the white paint before carefully drawing out the hamster you envisioned in your mind. beomgyu's eyes were closed, however he could feel how close your faces were, his ears turned to a slight pink shade, feeling rather flustered. "done." your soft, tender voice spoke, beomgyu's eyes opened up, staring into the mirror next to him, admiring your work of art. not long after, he got up, bidding you goodbye before leaving with his friends. you called out for the next student, giggling with them, not knowing that beomgyu's gaze was still on you, admiring the way your smile brightened up the entire room, everyone around you laughing away, having a fun time. everyone seemed to enjoy your presence, finally noticing how radiant you can be.

days after the festival, you hung out with a few new friends you made during the festival, gossiping, chatting about boys, the usual teenage stuff. of course you'd go back to the art room to meet beomgyu, however it felt different, you noticed that his usually welcoming, fun aura was replaced with a gloomy one. he tried his best to hide it from you, his signature smile appearing on his face whenever you guys talked, hugged or shared a quick kiss.

one particular evening, you were texting beomgyu like any other regular day, chatting about your day as per usual, a giddy smile stayed on your face.

yn★ : RIGHT IT WAS SO STUPID

beom:> : oh right, i have a request.

yn★ : hold on! my mum is calling for me

beom:> : if i look tired one day, can you drag me out to jump in the rain again? [deleted]

yn★ : im back

what was it that you deleted?

gyu?

hello????

you furrowed your eyebrows, beomgyu wasn't the type to leave you on delivered, this was new. you didn't know how to feel, your fingers moved faster than your mind, you closed the app, turning off your phone. you stared at the ceiling, tears pricking your eyes, is it true, is the '3 month rule' thing your friends talk about true? you sighed, wiping away the fallen teardrops before closing your eyes. maybe sleeping will remove all your problems.

it has been a long time since that happened, you felt like your relationship with beomgyu was going to fall apart, you didn't want that to happen at all, you were worried, he left you on delivered more often, even if he replied you, it was dry. you felt like a wreck. on the other hand, beomgyu felt like he was going back into the slump he was once in before he found you, this time it was worse. the unbelievably high standards his parents were setting for him, along with the physical abuse he had to endure was getting unbearable. in addition to that, beomgyu's parents limited the hours beomgyu could spend on his phone, also banning him from going out after they found out about him sneaking out to the art studio instead of cram school. they were furious, slapping him hard, ripping the drawings beomgyu drew during his freetime, shouting at him. beomgyu was tired, extremely exhausted of everything.

"gyu?" your voice suddenly sounded, the door behind him opened, beomgyu jumped in shock, he didn't expect you to be here so early. you closed the door behind you, maybe it was finally time you talked to him about this. "did you change your number?"

"no."

"was your service cut or something?"

"no."

"then what is it? at first i thought you were just busy but weeks and days turned into months, it is hard to see you in school, let alone contact you! but you said you were afraid of losing me." your words struck beomgyu like an arrow piercing through his heart, the way your voice cracked each time you uttered a word broke him, yet he didn't budge, he deserved it, that's what he felt.

"do you not feel it as well? ever since the festival, we've distanced so much, it's as if we're back to square one, like we don't know each other anymore." your tears were threatening to spill out, hitting beomgyu's chest. you were mad, but you were more upset than angry at beomgyu, what was he hiding from you.

"as we should." beomgyu mutterred out, bringing his hand to cover his face.

"what?" your mouth slightly ajar, you didn't hear that incorrectly right?

"yn, i think it's better if we just stop seeing each other, or maybe just forget about each other." beomgyu admitted, he didn't want this to end, he really didn't but he didn't want you to go through his sufferring, he wants you to have your own life without constantly worrying about him. you moved beomgyu's hand away from his face, only to realise that he was crying too. you were about to say something but the bell rung, signalling that lunch ended.

"let's go to somewhere before people see us here." you said with a hushed tone, leaving the art room, towards the stairwell nearby. beomgyu followed you closely, his lips pressed together, forming a straight line. his mind was in utter chaos right now, he just wanted to make the pain go away. the both of you sat beside each other on the staircase, waiting for everyone to go back to their classes.

"we're going to be late anyways, you can just tell your teacher you were feeling slightly unwell." you advised, beomgyu nodded his head, tilting his head down, his bangs falling over his eyes.

"im quitting the art studio to join the art academy for my entrance exam–" you took a deep breath in, noticing beomgyu's slighty shocked expression before turning away to look out the window, "so, if you want, you can join me too, then we can go to art school together." you tried staying positive, maybe after this, you and beomgyu still had a chance to see each other outside school and maybe even post highschool.

"i'm quitting art. it is just a hobby to me, i dont see any interest in taking art for college. and i.. can't rlly see you making it far with art too.." beomgyu confessed, maybe it was better for you to start hating him, rather than making you dwell over him and his well-being everytime. you looked at beomgyu with pure bitterness, you were speechless, did he really say that to you? you stood up, making beomgyu look up at you with tired eyes.

"at least i don't bottle up my feelings while making it obvious that i'm doing something i hate. you can spend your life giving up on things you like. like art and me. you coward." you grumbled, walking away from beomgyu, leaving him by the stairs. you were pissed, you quickened your pace towards the girls' bathroom, locking yourself up in the cubicle, letting out your pent up feelings. you hated this feeling, it was eating you up, maybe beomgyu had his reasons to push you away like that, but he could have just told you, why was he doing this.

beomgyu stared blankly at where you stood, he ruffled his hair in frustration, he looked down at the ground, "ah.. i really fucked up." he stared at his wrists, the past healed scars fading away, maybe if he started again, would he feel any better? beomgyu smacked his head, trying to wake himself up as he got up to return back to class.

his flower ༘⋆✿

"i think you should take up this challenge, especially since you want to enter one of the top art colleges." you teacher recommended, you took the pamphlet, scanning through the requirements. you gave it some thought, i mean of course you'd join, it'll look good on your portfolio, but whether you should take one for him.

"can i have one more?" you asked, your teacher smiled at you, handing you another piece. you thanked her and left the staff room, slowly walking back to class. you got to your seat, quickly scribbling something down on the post it you had conveniently laying around, before pasting it on the pamphlet, folding it nicely. you rushed out of your class, looking around for something or someone. luckily, you saw one of beomgyu's friend's, soobin, you knew that they were childhood friends so you could trust him with this.

"hey.. uhm, soobin, can you pass this on to beomgyu, don't tell him who it's from though." you whispered loudly, quickly handing him the folded pamphlet. soobin gave you a thumbs up, waving you a quick goodbye as he entered his classroom.

"beomgyu! something for you." soobin called out, to get beomgyu's attention. beomgyu turned to him with curiousity, taking the piece of paper from soobin's grasp. soobin dragged a chair next to him, waiting for beomgyu to read the contents. beomgyu's eyes straight away landed on the post it note that was loosely hanging on the phamplet.

'us going through this challenging period, is proof that we're trying our best to bloom, right?' it read, beomgyu took the paper, writing something down on the post it before sticking it on his journal. soobin looked at him like a meerkat, wondering what beomgyu was doing.

"oh, right, i might bring over some dinner for you later, i'll text you if i can't." soobin reminded, patting beomgyu's shoulder before leaving the classroom. beomgyu sighed, he really didn't want soobin to come over, he stared at his bandaged up wrist, as he layed his head on the table, closing his eyes for a quick nap.

beomgyu was done with everything, he was exhausted physically and mentally, if he couldn't distract himself, his mind would go haywire. this was especially hard since his screentime was only limited to an hour. the previous night, his dad finally came home after a long day of work, the smell of alcohol on his office dress shirt was loud, beomgyu was scared. his dad's footsteps came closer to his door, much to his disappointment, the door flung open.

"i heard you got back your physics paper, show it to me." beomgyu shivered at how menancing his dad sounded, he obeyed and quickly scrambled for his paper. he looked at his score, just an 80%, not perfect enough for his parents. beomgyu passed the papers to his dad, ready for the scolding of his life.

"fucking disappointment, this is what happened when you go to a bloody art studio instead of the cram school i painstakingly pay for." beomgyu's dad shouted, rage boiling throughout his veins, beomgyu's dad inched closer to beomgyu. slap, a loud, quick smack went across beomgyu's face, it was hard, beomgyu's fists trembled in fear, trying to endure the burning pain on his cheek. his dad grabbed a handful of beomgyu's hair, yanking him closer to him. beomgyu whinced in pain, tears threatening to spill out.

"if you don't stop acting like a useless piece of shit, i'll personally send you abroad." beomgyu's dad spat, tossing beomgyu onto the ground before leaving the room, slamming it shut. beomgyu leaned against his bed, staring up at the ceiling, feeling like nothing. how he wished he could text you right now, but either way, he didn't want to distrupt your sleep. beomgyu slowly got up, walking towards his study table, eyeing the sharpener blade he used to use before he was clean. like a paintbrush on a canvas, each stroke was clean, leaving behind a deep red colour each time, it was like his own artwork.

"ah.." beomgyu sighed, a tear falling out of his eye, looking at his wrist. you'd be so disappointed in him if you ever found out. he quickly took the bandage wraps that were in his drawer, wrapping it around his fresh wounds. beomgyu rubbed his eyes, plopping onto his bed, staring at his wallpaper, a picture your took of a cat on his phone, how he wished things would go back to how it used to be.

back to the present, school ended, students rushed out of their classroom, either wanting to hang out with their friends or to go home to rest. beomgyu knew that his father was home, he knew that he'd be back for another beating, he really didn't want to go home. he slowly packed his things, throwing his bag over his shoulder, proceeding towards his lockers. looking up, he saw you, smiling with your new friends, laughing at one another's jokes. as much as he wanted to run towards you, and bring back past memories, he couldn't he can't hurt you anymore.

beomgyu quickly walked past you, making his way back home. you noticed his familiar scent, you turned around to his direction, your smile faltering, you missed him so much, yet you couldn't bring yourself to text him. "yn? are you going to come?" your friend shook you out of your trance. you jolted at the sudden touch, "yea."

"i'm home." beomgyu announced, closing the front door, removing his shoes. he heard the television playing, dim lights, along with the strong smell of cigerattes and alcohol. not again.. beomgyu's eyebrows furrowed, he didn't want to deal with this again.

"choi beomgyu." beomgyu groaned internally at his name being called, his father looked mad, filled with rage, beomgyu knew he was fucked. "what's with your attitude in school now? the teacher called in saying that you've been sleeping in class more recently, is this how you fucking repay me? is this why you wanted to go to this neighbourhood school? to rebel against your parents?" beomgyu's dad continued rambling, moving closer towards beomgyu, his presence was horrifying, beomgyu felt his blood run cold. it all happened in the matter of seconds, beomgyu's face was now burning, he hissed in pain, holding onto his cheek, looking up at his dad who was staring down at him like he was an abandoned dog.

"pathetic. fucking pathetic. i wished i never had a son like you." beomgyu's dad spat, storming out of the house, probably out to go to the neighbourhood bar to party with his middle aged friends. beomgyu flinched when the door slammed shut, he sat on the ground, wiping off the blood on the side of his mouth. the taste of iron disgusted him, he got up onto his feet, walking into his room. he took out the journal he hid from his parents, the journal that he used to write about things he want to say to you. beomgyu flipped to the paragraph he wrote, rereading it, making sure that there were no flaws.

beomgyu laughed to himself, tears spilling out of his eyes, if his dad didn't even want him around, he might as well make that dream a reality. beomgyu wrote out one last line, before running out of the house, towards the apartment buildings nearby the school. the sky was overcast, dark grey clouds covering the sunrays, a few drops of raindrops fell on beomgyu as he brisk walked towards his desired location.

he trudged past the art studio, his eyes flickering into the studio, hoping that you were there, but who was he kidding, you left the studio to go to the art academy. however, the art director noticed him, shouting for him to get inside or he'll get rained on. beomgyu turned around, his look shocked the art director, he looked helpless, beomgyu bowed to the art director, before going off on his own.

"beomgyu! i have my mum's food here for dinner." soobin shouted, leaving the food on the kitchen counter. realising that there was no response, soobin was confused, maybe beomgyu was taking a nap. he entered beomgyu's room quietly, his eyes widening when he realised beomgyu wasn't anywhere to be found. his phone left on the table, the only thing that caught soobin's attention was the open journal left on beomgyu's desk, a long paragraph written on it. soobin read the content within that paragraph, panicking, soobin's mind was racing, 'fuck' repeating in his mind.

the letter read, 'i felt like i dreamt a very sweet, and awfully bitter dream, because the first moment i saw you combined with all the fleeting moments we spent together were too dazzling for me. you were always radiant. i hoped that only i would be the one to see your light. but others soon caught sight of it. and that's around when i realized something, i hadn't known when i'd been in the dark, the existence of my ugly shadow. the closer it got to the light, the thicker it became and the more it clung to me. so, i couldn't help but hide in the darkness again. i knew you would be hurt, but as you said i was a coward. i knew that you'd always stay with me through thick and thin, and that scared me, my problems would ultimately hurt you in the end either way. i knew how it would feel all too well. i was so used to giving up the things i liked that i thought i'd be okay again soon, just like always. i thought that all i had to do was to return to the way things were before i'd met you. that's what i thought, endless waves of self-hatred, a sense of helplessness, emptiness, loss, and absence. longing for the light, i'd already become accustomed to your warmth. but that short time with you had been the only moment I could be completely myself. thank you for being with me during my most radiant moment yn :)'

soobin unlocked beomgyu's phone, luckily he knew his phone password, he found your number, typing it down onto his own phone, dialing the number. soobin grabbed the journal, along with beomgyu's phone, running out of the house. on your end, you were suspicious on why the same number kept calling you, you were annoyed, the weather was perfect for a nap but it was distrupted by an endless string of phonecalls. you picked up your phone, immediately you heard a sigh of relief, along with a shaky panicky voice.

"you're yn right? please can you meet me at the convenience store nearby please, it's really urgent." soobin pleaded, his voice sounded like he was going to breakdown anytime soon. you were worried, what was exactly going on, why was beomgyu's childhood friend calling you?

"i'll come down soon, what is this about may i ask?" you questioned, grabbing your keys and wallet. "please hurry, run, i don't care, beomgyu's life is on the line. please yn.." soobin answered, shouting into his phone, he didn't want to waste anymore time, he started asking near passerbys about the whereabouts about beomgyu. your eyes widened, beomgyu? you dashed out of you house, yelling a quick goodbye to your mother.

"yn? it's raining take an umbrella-" the door was slammed shut, you tried calling beomgyu's phone, no response. the rain came pouring down, you were soaked in the salty rain. you ran towards the convenience store near your school, only to see soobin conversing with your art director.

"soobin!" you shouted, eyes filled with panic. soobin thanked your art director, you were confused, what were they talking about? "let's go, the apartments, your art director assumed that he might be there since she saw him headed towards that direction." soobin ordered, running. you ran along with him, taking notice of the plastic bag he was holding. it felt like forever, you were panting, gasping for air. the atmosphere was thick, both you and soobin were drenched.

"you take the elevator, i'll take the stairs." soobin said with a stern look, sprinting up the stairs. you pressed on the elevator button that closes the door multiple times, in hopes that it'll be faster. as soon as you reached the rooftop, you bolted out of the elevator, towards the two dark figures you saw in the distance. you begged your legs to hurry up when you saw beomgyu stick his leg out, risking it all. soobin's eyes widened, his hands reaching out for beomgyu, however..

"beomgyu!" you sped past soobin, reaching out to beomgyu first. half of your body was over the ledge, soobin grabbed onto the lowerhalf of your body, making sure that you wouldn't accidentally fall over. beomgyu looked up to see your desperate look, tears falling out of your eyes.

"do you really want to die that badly gyu? there's many other ways you can do this you know." you choked out, sobbing harder. beomgyu felt guilty, he looked down, realising how high it was.

"i don't want to die, but.. i'm more afraid of living under these circumstances." beomgyu managed to utter out, his voice muffled by the sound of rain hitting the surface below you.

"you know how proud i am for you that you're able to make it this far? i know how tough your situation is at home, but if you leave like this, you'll leave behind those who actually care for you. if you don't know how to love yourself, i'll teach you how. if you only know how to hurt yourself, i'll care for you! no matter how much life sucks, you need to stay alive, do the things you love, and come back to me. please beomgyu, give me another chance to care for you again!" you shouted, tears spewing out of your eyes, dripping on beomgyu's wet face, beomgyu felt himself whince, seeing you in such a state pained him.

beomgyu's hand reached out for yours, you turned around, giving soobin the signal to pull you two up. all three of you fell on the ground, you and soobin panting hard for oxygen. beomgyu stared at the sky, the salty raindrops falling on his face, his eyes red from all the crying. he then felt himself getting picked up from the ground, only to be embraced by your warmth.

"you fucking idiot, don't scare us again." soobin cursed out, his nose red from crying earlier, sniffling loudly. beomgyu chuckled at soobin's reaction, wrapping his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly. he missed this comforting, warm embrace of yours. constant apologies came out of beomgyu's mouth, trying to calm you down from this whole incident.

"please, never do that again." your puffy eyes and runny nose made beomgyu laugh, his hands wiping the tear rolling down your cheek. "oh right soobin, what's that in the plastic bag." beomgyu asked, pointing towards the wet bag. "oh it's the notebook i found on your desk, and your phone. also is this notebook some love confession book for yn or something." soobin blabbered, his lips curling up to a smirk. your head turned towards soobin quickly, accidentally knocking into beomgyu's chin.

"shut up, i use that book to write down stuff i want to tell yn." beomgyu admitted, averting your eyes, "guess i'll give it to your as an apology.." beomgyu pouted. you smiled at him, teasing him slightly.

"beomgyu, if you need a place to stay for awhile, you should stay at mine, my parents won't snitch. in the meantime, we can file a lawsuit against your parents." soobin advised, beomgyu gulped at his words, suing his own parents? he didn't want to since well they're his parents afterall, but after all he has been through, he nodded his head, standing up from the wet slippery ground.

"let's go back to the art studio to dry up first, just like the first time." you grinned at beomgyu, dragging him along with you. soobin grumbled behind you two about how he has to thirdwheel you two now. the three of you laughed, making your way to the art studio, the sun now out, shining brightly around your surroundings, glowly radiantly in the sky. this may be the most eventful summer you've ever experienced.

end ༘⋆✿

author's note: sorry if this is super long, and for the bad english. but i hope you enjoyed!!

[junvibing]

Artfully Yours

pairing: art major renjun! x fem!reader; youtuber!renjun

warnings: lots of art and ramen, renjun is very much in love, college

summary: Renjun wants to get you something special for your birthday. He has two problems though: 1. there's not much time left, 2. he's a perfectionist. But hey, at least Chenle gave him the perfect idea. Now, he only has to finish in time and hope you'll love it.

wc: 12.5k

a/n: I've been working on this on and off for around a year lol. Anyways I really like it and I hope you do too! Leave me feedback haha this is my first long fanfic and honestly it's special to me :') <3

song recommendation: Like we just met - nct dream

credit for art inspo: matlagesilke3 on pinterest

The second Renjun got home, he prepared to spend the rest of the day working on a drawing. Since it's due for tomorrow's Drawing II class, he really needs to put his energy into finishing it today. His art projects are often accompanied with him staying up into the nights to perfect them. Sometimes while painting his thoughts drift away and he starts thinking about other things. This tendency surely adds to him staying up late but for today he hopes he’ll be able to finish before midnight. That’s why Renjun starts gathering his materials quickly before sitting down at his desk. His room is a little messy but college is stressful and an art major is no exception. Especially since he is somewhat of a perfectionist but he couldn’t imagine studying anything else other than art. For as long as Renjun can remember, he was always interested in it. The way colors dance on the paper, the way they blend into each other or how he can create anything he wants and get lost in the process - he just loves it. One of his favorite things is to try out different art mediums and see how they work, how comfortable he could get with them and if he’ll resort back to them in the future. Over the years, he discovered that he loves painting with oil paints and watercolors the most as they bring him great joy and the best results. Both mediums can be tricky at the beginning and it wasn’t much different for him when he started out but proper practice helped a lot. However, Renjun also enjoys drawing on his tablet, which is especially useful if he wants to post his work online. 

In his opinion, art is meant to be shared and what better way is there to reach lots of people than sharing it online? That's why he had started to post his art on Twitter when he was still in middle school. Whenever someone retweeted his art, he felt so elated, it pushed him to continue sharing his work. In high school he even started exploring with posting videos on YouTube, all related to art of course. Jisung, his classmate and one of his best friends, had encouraged him to just go for it and soon enough his other friends had joined in. Thinking back to his very first YouTube video, Renjun lets out a chuckle. Dang, I was so nervous. Shaking his head, he continues sketching. The thing is he never used to show his face on Twitter, it was all about his art and creativity but with the encouraging words of Jisung and his other friends, he dared to show his face on YouTube, alongside his art of course. The first video Renjun ever posted was of him drawing Moomin fan art. Over the years, his channel actually gained quite a bit of attraction and while in high school, he would often daydream about making money with his artwork even though he knew his parents wouldn’t really support him in pursuing such a career. As far as Renjun knew, his parents wanted him to get a “real” career. But he spent most of his free time either with his friends or sketching, drawing and painting. 

I still do that. Renjun sits at his desk, room dimly lit and pencil in his right hand. But y/n’s in the picture as well now. He grew up with art and it accompanied him throughout his ups and downs. He loves being creative, that’s why he had decided to go through with applying for a fine arts major when the time came around. However, his parent’s opinion and support was important to him. So at the time, he had a serious talk with them. Renjun knew they only had his best interest at heart. Naturally, they want him to be successful in life and it’s important to his parents that their only child has a good and comfortable life. They imagined for him to pursue a high paying, high status job like being a lawyer. His parents couldn’t picture how studying art would provide him with something like that. To them, pursuing an art career was too unstable, too risky. But Renjun managed to show them different ways in how he actually could be successful with it. He would do internships, could go into graphic design, could become an illustrator or go as far as to become an art instructor. There are different paths he would be able to take that would pay him well and hearing that eventually convinced his parents. Of course, Renjun had been overjoyed about that. He still is actually. All his life, art was one of the things that brought him the most happiness and his parents supported him in pursuing it as a career. What else could he wish for?

Turns out, there really was something else he could have wished for. He only knew it after you entered his life though. Renjun occasionally thinks back to how you two met. Out of nowhere, his mind sometimes drifts to the first time he saw you. Just like right now. The window in his room lets little light shine through, the sun is almost fully set at this point and the only other light source is the lamp on his desk, illuminating a bottle of milk and a few pieces of fruit. Renjun’s project for tomorrow is a still life, an art depiction of inanimate objects. It is pretty normal for him to drift off when he was monotonously sketching away, which is exactly what he is doing right now. His pen glides easily on the paper in front of him while he thinks back to his second semester. Renjun never really used to be a person who obsessed over relationships. His mind was filled with other things like ideas for art videos. In fact, he actually used to be the type who didn’t believe in love at first sight, which Jaemin thought was crazy by the way. But you kinda proved Renjun wrong. 

He still remembers the day clearly. It was fall and Mark invited you to come hang out with the boys. The dreamies, as Haechan likes to call their friend group, were still great friends even if they didn’t see each other everyday like they did back in high school. Mark actually mentioned your name before, it wasn’t your first time hanging out with the boys either but the few times you were with them, Renjun couldn’t make it, so he only officially met you in his second semester. Crazy, almost two and a half years ago. He can still remember exactly how he reacted to seeing you for the first time. The second Renjun’s eyes landed on you, the things and people around him somehow were moving in slow motion. To say he was intrigued by you would’ve been an understatement. You looked so mesmerizing, smiling at whatever Jisung was saying while the evening sun hit your face in the most beautiful way. Renjun felt like he was looking at the prettiest painting he ever laid his eyes on. All the beautiful, intricate art he saw over the years didn't compare to you and he immediately wanted to introduce himself. From that day onwards you joined his dear collection of things he loves to draw the most. 

It actually didn’t take long for Renjun to ask you out as there was no way he would be able to let you slip through his fingers. Over the years, your relationship has been going strong. Just like art you've become a constant in Renjun’s life that he wishes to never lose. With time, he even introduced you on his YouTube channel. It took a little convincing but after a while you were able to put your shyness away and join him in a vlog. Renjun smiles, thinking back to your first video together. Back then, he had decided to participate in the challenge of drawing under a blue light and you tagged along in his vlog at the beginning. It was fun for both of you and Renjun’s subscribers enjoyed seeing you guys together. The comments were flooded with how cute the two of you were and requests for you to join him more on his channel. But for today, Renjun's plans don’t include any art challenge. It’s time to finish this still life. He needs the day tomorrow for something else, something more important. 

The next day, with a fresh mind and his still life finished, Renjun prepares for a different project. There is still a bit of time left before he needs to get to class, so he wants to use it to start before it's time to turn in his still life. Renjun has something special planned for you. Your birthday is just around the corner and he had been unsure on what to get you. Last year he got you a beautiful necklace with a butterfly charm. “To show you my appreciation” is what he had said when putting it on you. Renjun never wanted to stop feeling warm and fuzzy inside when he was with you. For this year’s gift, he was thinking about decor for your dorm room since you moved recently. Yet for some reason, whenever he was strolling through stores, keeping an eye out for a suitable gift, he felt like nothing fit perfectly. You don’t really need a new rug or pillows. Your room is already decorated with various plants. Just getting you a few scented candles like Mark suggested was too plain. Getting a mug was out of the question as it’s not special enough for you. Not to mention a mug technically isn’t decor. Although it could be. However, Renjun wanted to get you something special, something that shows he put thought into it and when speaking to Chenle about it the other day, he suggested the perfect idea: painting you a picture. 

Naturally, Renjun drew small pictures for you over the course of your relationship and you cherished every single one of it but he never created a proper painting for you. Almost outrageous, how come he never did that for his girlfriend? Even Jeno did it at some point for his girlfriend. Or tried at least. Nevertheless, she loved it and Renjun still remembers your reaction actually. You and her go way back, having met during middle school. Naturally, you only ever wished the best for your best friend. So of course, seeing her that happy about Jeno’s gift, had put a smile on your face. You even laughed a little, seeing her show it off to the others. Thinking back, that should’ve been Renjun’s first clue to paint you something for your birthday. But at least he came around now, even if it is a little overdue. As soon as he had decided to paint you something to put on your wall, he had brainstormed for ideas. His still life project got in the way so he couldn’t start earlier but today is finally the day he can turn his draft for your gift into the beginnings of a painting. Last week, Renjun sat down and thought about what he wanted to paint for you and since the painting is supposed to fit your room well, he had decided to go with an enchanted forest. He feels like it would complement the various plants in your room nicely. A dark forest with colorful sparks throughout would be the perfect eye catcher for your plain white dorm wall. He had decided to draw two particular trees to accentuate the centerpiece of his painting: a magical path that’s curving to the right. Renjun feels very confident about the idea, so much so that he had decided to film a YouTube video around it: “Painting for my gf’s birthday”, where he documents the process of his painting and captures your reaction to the present. 

That’s why he sits in his chair right now, camera on his desk and films himself. His subscribers will surely enjoy seeing this. “Hi painters, so my girlfriend’s bday is just around the corner and I’ve been struggling quite a bit with finding a gift. I can’t just get her an ordinary gift, you know me. So I was thinking and searching and man almost gave up but my friend literally saved the day.“ Renjun salutes to the camera. “谢了, 哥们.“ ”So anyway, I decided to go with his idea of painting for her, hence this video. I was brainstorming in advance and already did a vague sketch of my idea.“ Renjun holds his sketchbook into the camera so his viewers can see the enchanted forest. “You can see it’s supposed to be a forest. I wanna add different colored sparks to it and make the path here a blueish white to give it a fairy, enchanted type of feel.” Renjun traced the path with his finger and then mentioned two particular trees. “The big trees in the front that bend over and form a heart accentuate the magical path nicely. I also added a little pond. I really like it and I think y/n will like it as well.” Renjun adjusts the camera to show his canvas and him. For the next thirty minutes, he hunches over his desk, sketching his draft carefully onto the canvas. Since this is supposed to be the centerpiece of your wall, Renjun bought a big canvas last week. It is supposed to be an eye-catcher after all. As the time passes and he finishes sketching, he stands up to look at his work. “Okay that’s good enough.” Renjun looks into the camera. “I’ll stop for now cause I have class in about forty minutes. But I’ll see you later tonight when I continue. Y/n’s bday is literally in 9 days and you know how it goes with oil paints, long drying times. So I need it to be done one day before her bday, meaning there’s no time to slack off.” Renjun takes the camera into his hand and smiles before moving his hand in front of the lens. “Only the best for my babe.” 

Hours later, Renjun is setting up his camera again. After his last class for today, art history, he got some lunch with the boys in the dining hall. Mark and Haechan had class though, so the group wasn’t complete. The boys catched up a little but Renjun didn’t want to spend too much time eating. There was still a project awaiting him at home after all. That’s why he only had a small chicken salad. Jaemin talked about how his professor has been kicking his butt with reading assignments for class and to be fair, Renjun could understand. There was just something unpleasant about having to read two 15 page papers about the causes and consequences of the French revolution. But Jaemin chose to major in history education. Although Renjun knows it’s not Jaemin's fault for having an unpleasant professor. Chenle, however, hadn’t been that interested in his friend’s distress. “Glad I don’t have to deal with that”, is what he had said. “Yeah, you need to deal with statistical models dude, gross” Jaemin really doesn’t like math. But, the boys were all able to agree that college workload is a lot, whether one studies education or economics. “Chill guys”, Jeno had taken a bite of his pizza slice, “Jun, how’s it going with y/n’s gift?” Well, Renjun still has lots to do, which is why he had used that opportunity to briefly explain his progress and bid his friends goodbye to go straight to his dorm.

“I’m back, people. I turned in a project and I had art history today which wasn’t so great. It has the touch of being boring sometimes but it’s okay, let‘s continue.” Renjun turns his camera to show the sketch he made earlier today. “This is what we’re working with. It’s time to bring some color into this. I don’t wanna waste much time, so let’s begin.” He pulls his easel out and places the canvas on it. The camera is pointing at him and the canvas again but this time he is standing in the middle of his room. After opening a window, he starts with mixing light gray and dark brown. Oil paints don’t have the nicest smell, so it’s good to have a window or two open while painting. This way, Renjun can maximize the time he is able to paint before getting a headache. “Since I don’t have much time for this painting, I’ll use a fast drying medium. Hopefully this way the painting will be dry on time for y/n’s bday.” Renjun starts with a medium sized brush to paint a thin layer of light gray on the middle of his canvas, where fog would later shine through the trees. The next step is to use brown to block in the general shape of the trees. The two bend trees forming a heart take up quite a bit of space on the left and right side of his canvas. Later on, he wants to spend time on the details to tie everything in. Renjun, like most artists, finds it better to start with the general shape of things and work himself up to the smaller, more detailed parts of a painting. 

After almost two hours of painting, he takes a small break to get a snack. I should still have a pack of ramen left somewhere. Of course, only if his roommate Jay didn’t eat it. After locating the ramen and preparing it quickly, Renjun places his camera in front of him. “As you can see, I took a break guys. I’m sitting in the kitchen right now since I don’t want to expose myself to the smell of the paint unnecessarily. I only have a little bit of the background left. So, I think I should be able to finish in about twenty minutes or so.” Renjun turns his camera off to continue eating. Conveniently enough for him, you video call him while he's still eating. So, he wasn’t rushed to get out of his room to hide his painting from you. Renjun answers your call while positioning his phone against the fruit bowl on the table. “Hi babe, hold up.” After his phone is stable, he smiles at you. “How was your day?” Seeing Renjun after a long day makes you sigh and smile at him. You just wanted to see him and hear his voice for a while to feel better. “Exhausting, I had so much class today and work was a mess.” You pout. You work at a coffee shop downtown a few days a week to save up some money. Sadly, more often than not, you have to deal with difficult customers. “I’m sorry to hear that, love. Did you just get home?” You nod. It is way past nine in the evening and you were ready to go to sleep in a bit, ideally with Renjun cuddling you but that won’t happen today. “Jun, how come you’re eating at this hour?” You know he doesn’t usually eat this late as he doesn’t like to go to bed with a full stomach. Renjun quickly tries to come up with a plausible answer. He doesn’t want to tell you that he spent a good portion of the day painting your gift. “I had a bit of a light lunch today, went out with the boys but didn’t eat too much.” That technically wasn’t a lie either. During lunch he was eager to go back home to paint your gift but the boys insisted he ate at least something before spending hours on it. Renjun and you spend the next ten minutes talking, before he sents you a kiss through the camera and you hang up for the night. 

After washing his bowl, he goes back to his room. He could feel a headache approaching but was determined to finish the background today. Soon enough, around thirty minutes later, Renjun picks up his camera again. “I’m finished with the background guys. This is how it looks so far.” He turns the camera to show the canvas in detail and zooms in a little. At this point, it looks like a simple foggy forest with tall, leafless trees. Renjun will worry about the details later, for now this is good enough. “Quite simple but that’s fine for today. Hopefully it’ll be dry by tomorrow so I can continue after classes. See you then.” Renjun quickly changes into his pajamas and brushes his teeth to go to bed but not before making sure to keep his window open. 

Wednesday morning comes around and Renjun wakes up in his chilly room. He doesn’t mind it that much since he needs to get to class soon anyway. His Wednesdays are usually packed with classes. But thankfully, they are ones he mostly enjoys, Ceramics, Contemporary Art, Digital Media and lastly Painting II. After quickly eating breakfast and getting dressed, he was ready to start the day. Today, Renjun and you are actually planning to get lunch together. Wednesdays and Fridays were set dates where you would either hang out in between classes and snack on a few things or eat lunch together. Renjun loves doing small, simple things with you like snacking on sandwiches together. Since you’ve been busy lately with your part time job at the coffee shop, he hasn’t been able to spend lots of time with you. He made an effort to show up at your workplace every other day or so but seeing you for fifteen minutes just wasn’t enough, which is why he looked forward to today. As soon as his fourth class finishes, he makes a beeline to the door. 

You were supposed to meet next to the library and just as agreed he sees you standing there, smiling down at your phone. You’re wearing one of his hoodies and jeans, quite simple but you still manage to look great. As if you had a feeling he was coming your way, you look up. Renjun kisses your cheek, “Hi love, missed you.” He holds out his hand for you. Putting your hand in his, you start walking towards a convenience store nearby campus. “Junnie, how was class? Did you manage to finish your charcoal drawing from last week?” A few weeks ago in Painting II, Renjun's professor introduced the topic of shading with paint. His professor gave a deadline of one week to turn in a small charcoal drawing and today they had the first hour of class to finish it. The assignment was only intented to be a supplementary technique though. It would help to understand contrast and value as a basis for shading with paint. Charcoal isn’t a medium Renjun uses often, so he chose a somewhat simple object to draw, a vase full of your favorite flowers, tulips. “Yeah, I managed to finish it within the last ten minutes. The shading was a little tricky though. I’m not too satisfied with it but you know my perfectionist self.” Renjun smiles sheepishly. You know he takes his art seriously and has a tendency to focus a little too much on the details. Sometimes he would ask you to have a look at this work since your input helped him and over time he learned that looking at his art with a fresh set of eyes always worked. Nevertheless, in your opinion, he always manages to create something that was beautifully executed.

On the way to the supermarket you tell him about your day, how boring class was and how your professor gave you tons of reading material for the next class. Renjun knows you have a thing for reading, hence your English literature major but he never understood how you were able to survive reading so much for your degree. He enjoys reading from time to time but having to read pages upon pages of who knows how old literature and analyzing it all in class never had much appeal to him. Nevertheless, he listens attentively to you and after you both get some snacks that Renjun kindly carries, you walk back to campus to your favorite spot near the economics department. Just a few minutes away from the main building were a few benches looking out at the gardening club’s flower field. You and Renjun love to sit on one of them and enjoy the beauty of different flowers together. Thankfully, one of the benches isn’t occupied so you both can sit down and enjoy your break together. Every year, the gardening club arranges their flowers in different themes. A few months ago in summer the theme was “beach sun set”. For this, their flower field basically consisted of flowers in three colors: blue, orange and yellow. Since the season has already changed, a new theme is in place at the moment. This winter, the gardening club focussed on winter themed food by using white and red roses arranged in a way that looked like a candy cane and so on. Renjun likes the idea of different themes, it was nice to see the club have fun with being creative. In a way they're creating their own art. 

An hour later, Renjun walks you to your next class and squeezes your hand lovingly before making his way home. He is happy that he got to spend some quality time with you, even if it wasn’t very long. While walking back, he is mentally preparing a list of what he needs to paint next for your gift. Since the background was finished and hopefully dry, the next step would be to go into more detail by giving the trees more depth, properly outlining their roots and branches. Renjun also wants to add more color accents to the trees by painting green and slightly bluish leaves. He wants to mimic moon light shining through the forest. It would cast onto the leaves of the trees and give them a light blue tint. As soon as Renjun arrives home, he continues filming his painting process. “Hi painters, I’m back for the next round. Right now it's Wednesday afternoon, meaning I have exactly 6 days left for this painting to finish, so it can still dry in time. Let's go!” The next hours of Renjun’s day consisted of his open window, the smell of oil paints and color on his fingers. At one point, he did actually take a small break to eat, even his roommate Jay made an appearance. Renjun gets along just fine with him but both prefer to stay in their respective rooms, meaning they don't see each other often. He literally is just his roommate, still a cool guy though. One time Jay even asked him for some art advice. Renjun didn't really imagine him to be the type of guy to be interested in art, but turns out he wanted to try out something new. Of course, Renjun was happy to help and advise. Maybe this time for his painting he would ask Jay for his opinion. 

Thursday flew by him it seemed. Renjun got in and out of class, worked on another assignment and met up with the dreamies. He didn’t continue to paint on the canvas because it was still too wet. Time is worrying him a little bit since the paint takes longer to dry than he likes and he still needs to do quite a bit. But he'll push through. Renjun is determined to finish your gift one day before your birthday and there's no way he'll give you an unfinished painting.

The next day, your Friday lunch break falls short because of an essay you have to finish. However, this gives Renjun more time to perfect his painting for you, which he feels like he really needs. He spent so much time working on it, yet he still isn’t satisfied with the outcome. In fact, he feels like the painting was nowhere near being finished in time. There is something about the way he placed the sparks that he doesn't like. The thing is, he can’t really pinpoint why exactly he doesn't like it. They just aren't really “flying” in the air well enough. Some are too close together, others too far apart. In a way it doesn't look natural enough, but that in itself doesn't make any sense, cause no normal forest has such sparks flying through it. Renjun was expecting them to deepen the magical feeling of the forest, but for some reason he couldn’t portray that feeling onto the canvas in a satisfactory way. Regardless, a few spots shouldn't be enough to give him the feeling of not liking the placement of the sparks overall, right?

To be frank, he is very frustrated. So, at one point he decides to vent to his camera. “I know I’m too nitpicky. But I just want it to look perfect for y/n. I also know she will like my painting regardless. Heck, she probably wouldn’t mind if I doodled her something as a present. But I want it to be deserving of being in her room. I want her to love my painting and me to like it as well.” Renjun wipes a hand down his face. “Maybe I’ve been on this for too long. It’s already past 7 pm and I’ve been working on this painting since I ate lunch. Or maybe time is just stressing me. There are only a few days left and I still need to work on the details.” Renjun decides he needs a break, a fresh breath of air. Maybe the oil paint smell is messing too much with his ability to create. Whatever the case is, he decides to go by your workplace and see you. Your smile would definitely help him feel better. 

As soon as you see Renjun walking through the door of the coffee shop, you have a smile on your face. Your work day is slowly coming to an end and even though most customers today weren’t that difficult to handle, working a long shift naturally tires your body out, which is why it's a pleasant surprise to see your boyfriend. “Junnie, what are you doing here?” Seeing you standing behind the counter smiling at him, gives Renjun a warm and comfy feeling. It was like all of his worries evaporated into thin air as soon as your beautiful face smiled up at him. “Hi love, came to see you. I needed a fresh breath of air.” You walk around the counter to give him a quick kiss on the cheek, the rag still in your left hand. As expected, his insides are feeling fuzzy again.

You’ve always had that effect on him. Renjun didn’t really mind holding your hand in public or you leaning on him, but kisses, even if only on the cheek, are something intimate to him, so he only really initiates them in public if he really misses you. Otherwise they are kept for when you two are in private. “Trouble with painting again?” Renjun smiles sheepishly. Of course, you would figure him out. But he doesn’t mind and fortunately, you don’t know what exactly he was painting. “Yeah, I think I’ve been on it for a bit too long. You and a nice cup of tea will surely help.” Renjun isn’t a big fan of coffee, he preferred drinking tea over coffee any day. Whenever he comes around the coffee shop you work at, he either orders tea or just some pastry to snack on, sometimes both if he feels like looking at you a little longer. Often Renjun thinks about how pretty you look and about how he could watch you for hours. He realizes that thought might be creepy but you didn’t mind when he told you about it one day. It’s him after all, not some stranger. 

You quickly wipe down the table before going behind the counter again to prepare his drink. Today, Renjun chose to drink lemon tea. Being the nice girlfriend that you are, you gave him a small cookie on the side as well. Sadly, he can’t spend much time talking to you as new customers come in. That‘s why he sits down at a table and enjoys his tea and the cookie. How nice it would be if we could just sit on my bed and talk. Or rather on her bed, can’t have her seeing the painting. Occasionally, he looks over to see you wiping down tables and you wink at him. He was right, a tea and you definitely help to calm his mind. Renjun spends about twenty minutes in the coffee shop before he gets up and gives you a sweet goodbye. It is time to return to the dorm and continue his painting.

For now, he plans to continue with a few details of trees. Maybe having a fresh look at the sparks tomorrow is a better idea. Not counting today, 5 days were left till your birthday, which meant he effectively has 2 to 3 days left to paint since oil paint, even with a quick drying medium, still needs comparatively long to dry. After working for about half an hour on the details of the trees in the back, Renjun feels a little better about his painting. He takes this as an incentive to end the day with a positive feeling and grabs his camera again. “Okay guys, I’m calling it quits for today. It’s about 8 pm already. I think it’s better to tackle the sparks tomorrow. �� Renjun quickly shows the current state of his painting before he turns off the camera. 

The next day is a Saturday, meaning Renjun has all day to paint and he wakes up with a good feeling. He quickly eats breakfast and immediately wants to get to painting, so he sets up his camera to further film his painting process. It’s time to focus on the sparks. The ones he already painted were in different colors, namely pink, yellow, blue and red. But looking at his canvas with a fresh set of eyes, he realizes they were not bright enough for his liking. They aren’t really sparkling. Maybe the feeling he got last evening of them not “flying” in the forest nicely was caused by that. He needs to paint in such a way that they look like they were actually sparkling. Renjun has the revelation that he needs to add highlights to the sparks. Adding highlights to them would ensure that the sparks stand out more against the forest, making them more interesting and giving the painting a more refined look. He likes that approach. Maybe he can even place the highlights in such a way that it would have the effect of letting single sparks look more apart from others. This way his problem of the placement of some sparks would be solved, at least to some extent. 

For the next hour Renjun works on adding enough highlights and blending around the sparks. He also adds a few more sparks to the forest. Taking a few steps back from his canvas, he regards the result. This time, Renjun definitely likes it a lot more. The sparks look nice against the dark forest and shine in different colors. It felt realistic and he was happy with the outcome so far. He grabs his camera, “Finally guys, I managed to paint the sparks in a way I’m satisfied with. I had the realization this morning that I needed to add highlights to them and I'm happy to report that it was a good idea.” Renjun shows his viewers the current state of his painting. “I’m thinking of continuing with the details of the two bent trees in the front. I only have a few days left to paint and I still need to work on the details of the pond.” Renjun puts his camera back on his desk again, before facing the canvas. These two trees still need leaves and defined roots. He wants to make them look like they are quite old.

Basically, Renjun spent the rest of his day painting, except for the occasional toilet and food break. After hours in front of his canvas, his head hurts. His bedroom is cold because of the opened window, yet he still feels the effects of the oil paint. Whatever. I need to continue at least a little bit more. At this point, the two trees forming a heart are finished. Renjun added a few bushes to the forest as well and moss around the pond. Since he had decided to make the path leading to the pond a blueish white, he worked on that as well. This way, it seems like the moon lights it up. Of course, he also needs to add highlights to the crown of the trees. He thinks about whether to make them a different color, but ultimately decides to go with the same blueish white since it ties in better with his concept of the moon shining down on the forest. Renjun wants to finish that part today, before calling it quits for tonight. It should take him under half an hour to finish this detail and then he can enjoy a bowl of ramen before going to bed.

The following day, Renjun can’t really continue working on his painting since it needs to dry, so he mainly spends the day working on his art history essay that is due for Tuesday’s class. He already had planned it ahead, which is why he had mainly focused on his painting for you yesterday. Since it needed to dry for him to continue, Renjun can use today for his assignment. He needs to write an essay about the way leadership and power gets depicted in art. For that he had to choose a picture to analyze and write about. Renjun knows he is pushing it a bit late but since he doesn’t plan to work on anything else today, he figures it’s fine. He’s sure that he can finish the assignment today and if not, he still has a bit of tomorrow left. It is only supposed to be four pages long anyway. How hard can that be, right? Well turns out a little harder than he had thought. Renjun spends around three hours in front of his laptop before he decides to take a break. I really should eat something. After all this writing his brain needs energy and a break. Standing up from his desk, he turns around and his gaze falls on the canvas in his room. Renjun inspects it carefully from a distance and actually likes the result. Of course, it still isn’t finished. He definitely needs to add a few more details. The bend trees need to look more interesting and realistic. A few more details on the trees in the back would be good. Maybe I also should add a few more sparks-– his finger twitches. There is nothing more that Renjun wants in this moment than to grab his brush and continue painting, perfecting your present. But right now is not the time. He shakes his head lightly. Still needs to dry. 

Trying to get his thoughts away from the painting, Renjun decides on what show to watch while he eats something. Surprisingly, he has been enjoying a Chinese drama you recommended lately, but maybe watching the next 40-minutes episode isn’t such a great idea with an unfinished essay sitting on his desk. So he decides to just watch a YouTube video. Twenty minutes later, Renjun sits at his desk again and continues with his essay. That’s basically how he spends his whole afternoon. Around 6 pm he is actually almost finished with the essay. That’s why he decides to get up and go into the kitchen to make some ramen. He knows that he ate a little too much ramen throughout the week but they are really just so convenient when he doesn't have much time to cook. 

However, on the way to the kitchen, his doorbell suddenly rings. Renjun isn’t expecting anyone, his roommate might have but Jay doesn’t come out of his room to open the door. So when the bell rings a second time, Renjun opens the door. To his surprise, it’s you. You stand there, smiling at him, dressed in an oversized jacket and plaid pajama pants, a small handbag on top of your right shoulder and a plastic bag in your left hand. As usual, you look cute and cozy but Renjun can’t really concentrate on that. He only stares at you. Why is she here? Did I miss something? And then it hits him. He curses in his head, you’re here for the movie night you both agreed on last week. Seems like amidst all the painting and college he forgot about it. Good going Renjun. You tilt your head a little to the side, “Baby, are you going to let me in?” Renjun’s mind immediately goes to your gift. Damn it, the painting’s still in my room! He can’t possibly let you see it. In panic, Renjun turns his head back, looking into the flat. He needs to come up with some kind of excuse right now, on the spot, “Love, babe, give me like 2 minutes okay, my room’s kinda messy”, he looks at you, his hand already resting on the door to close it. “Jun, you know I don’t care about that”, you step forward, laughing a little but he holds his ground. “No really, just give me like 5 minutes”, Renjun doesn’t give you any time to properly react and closes the door. 

Quickly jogging into his room, he looks around. He only needs to hide the canvas, his paints and brushes aren’t a problem. But where should he hide it? Behind the closet? No way, too risky. The kitchen, no it’s right next to the front door. And then it hits him. Jay! Carefully grabbing the canvas, Renjun quickly goes across the hall and knocks on his roommate’s door. “Listen dude, my girl’s just outside the door but I can’t have her see this painting. Can I please hide it in your room for a few hours?” Fortunately, Renjun and Jay get along well. “Oh yeah sure” Jay points to the corner next to his dresser, “you can put it there dude” Renjun quickly puts the painting down and thanks Jay like three times before he goes to get you. “Okay love, you can come in.” “Thank you for being so gracious, your highness” You jokingly bow down before entering, Renjun shakes his head, closes the door and grabs your hand. You do sometimes have this amusingly bizarre streak. “How come you suddenly felt the need to tidy up your room for me? Hiding something?”, you tease him. Renjun almost scratches his head. Surely, if he would’ve done that you would be more suspicious of him. “It’s just messy babe. I want you to be comfortable.” Humming, you decide to give him the benefit of the doubt. It sure seems like he didn’t expect you to come over today though. “Did you forget our movie night, Junnie?” Renjun smiles apologetically and nods, “Sorry love, promise, next time I won’t forget.” He squeezes your hand. Renjun normally isn’t the person to forget your dates. Spending time with you is one of his favorite things to do but even he can sometimes forget. You don’t mind, he’s also just human. Besides, you know Renjun had a couple of deadlines lately. 

Entering his room, the familiar sight of art materials, a few soda cans and an easel greets you. Renjun keeps his room mostly tidy except for whenever exam season hits and he has to deal with many art projects at the same time. Renjun’s habit of spending too much on details leads him to making full use of the deadlines, which in return stresses him out so much that he doesn’t bother a lot with cleaning. To you that’s fine, you aren’t much different in that aspect. Besides, why add more stress to exams by worrying about whether your room is clean or not. You make your way to his bed and put your handbag down, your gaze finding the empty easel in the middle of his room. That usually means he's working on something. “Jun, what have you been working on?” Renjun’s gaze quickly follows yours. Dang, should've put that away! Okay, just say something. Quick! “Ahh love, you know I have a few projects due soon. I’ve been spending a lot of time painting.” Renjun sits down next to you, nodding as if he was trying to reassure himself that he wasn’t caught by you. But technically he didn’t lie. Quickly trying to change the subject, he grabs your plastic bag. Before coming over to Renjun’s place, you quickly got a few snacks at a convenience store. “No movie without snacks right? Oh and I got you some ramen as well, Jun.” He looks inside the plastic bag, it contains chips in two different flavors, some gummy bears, his favorite ramen and pretzel snacks. “Thank you love, I should still have some soda in the fridge for us.” Renjun stands up and takes a step in the direction of the door but halts as you grab his wrist. “Jun, can we prepare the ramen now? I’m actually quite hungry, I haven't had dinner yet.” You’re hoping he agrees as the last thing you ate today was just a piece of toast a couple of hours ago. After your eight hour shift at work today you worked a little on an assignment before buying the snacks for tonight. Renjun immediately agrees, laughing a little. “Sure, I’ve literally wanted to make myself some ramen before you rang the bell.”

After cooking the ramen and grabbing two soda cans, you’re sitting on Renjun’s bed while turns off the lights before he grabs his laptop. Since he knows how much you like to have a few scented candles lit up while watching a movie, Renjun also does that before sitting cross-legged next to you and putting his blanket over you both. Turning on the third Harry Potter movie, you cuddle up to him and enjoy the evening together. Three weeks ago, Renjun and you had decided to rewatch all HP movies and so far you both enjoyed it very much. It’s been years since the last time you watched them, so you figured doing it together would be fun. That’s why you’ve met up with Renjun once a week for movie night, snacking away your worries and college stress for at least the few hours that you spend together with him. Sitting together under the blanket and just spending time together with him is one of your favorite things to do. It doesn't matter if you watch a movie or drink tea together, you just enjoy spending time in Renjun’s arms. How can you not? Renjun is just so good to cuddle. That’s why you always end up putting your head on his shoulder, hugging him and it’s no different today. Your head is resting on his shoulder and his arm around you. 

From time to time Renjun gives your body a little squeeze and feeds you snacks. He also sneaks a few glances at you. Seeing you so comfortable around him, makes his insides feel warm. So cute. He might love you a little more every time he sees you like this. You aren’t wearing any makeup and aren’t dressed up, yet you manage to make him attracted to you nonetheless. There is just something so attractive about you being your true self around him, not caring about how you look in your pajamas or how much you snack. Suddenly, Renjun feels the urge to kiss you. If only you weren’t so focused on the movie, “My love”. You hum as an answer, eyes still glued on the laptop screen. “Look at me please.” You lift your head off his shoulder and Renjun just looks at you lovingly. While you slowly sit up, he can only think about how you really are the most beautiful woman he set his eyes on. Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, he slowly leans in. Renjun believes there is nothing better in the world than moments like these. Moments where everything fades into the background and only you two seem to exist. Moments where he can be very close to you and his lips can meet yours in a loving and intimate way. Your lips are soft and smooth in such a way it feels like kissing the clouds. Your hand naturally finds its way into Renjun’s hair. His right hand cups your cheek while his lips move slowly against yours. His other hand rests on your waist and after a loving moment, Renjun tilts his head a little more to the side, deepening the kiss. His lips still taste a little of the ramen you two had earlier but you don’t mind. Kissing him is always great. In a sense, kissing him is like drinking a cup of hot cocoa on cold winter days. Renjun’s kisses give you comfort, warmth and a sense of belonging like you’ve never felt before. Even in very passionate moments, where kissing him stole your breath away, Renjun is caring and gentle. Just like now as he holds you a little closer, loving you a little more. His hand, previously on your cheek, moves down, stroking your waist. Slowly he pulls away, hands still on your waist. “I love you.” Truly, you’re one of the people that make him the happiest. Smiling, you lean into him to place your lips on his one more time, portraying your love for him. “I love you too.” Putting your head on his shoulder again, you notice the movie is still playing. Both of you return to watching and enjoying it further. 

Around halfway through the movie, the cozy atmosphere and dim lit room actually make you sleepy. You did have a long day today and after a while, Renjun notices your lack of comments and snacking. Turning his head to look at you, he sees you fast asleep on his shoulder. Not wanting you to be cold, he places the blanket further up your body and tightens his arm around you. Renjun is unsure about waking you. Since you don’t need to work tomorrow morning, you could sleep over today. It’s been quite a while anyway since the last time you slept over at his place. To be honest, he kind of misses falling asleep with you next to him. However, if you are to sleep over, the painting will need to stay in Jay’s room for the night. I guess I could ask him. He probably wouldn’t mind. Renjun decides he would ask. So he slowly begins to move your head from his shoulder, hoping you won't wake up. He really tries to be careful but apparently isn’t careful enough since you slowly start to wake up while he tries to lay your head down onto a pillow. Slowly sitting up, you quietly mumble his name. Your hooded eyes find the laptop screen still playing the movie. “I’m sorry love, didn’t wanna wake you” “It’s okay. When did I fall asleep?” Renjun smiles, “I’m not sure, some time ago.” “Oh”  “Yeah, oh” He laughs a little. “Do you wanna sleep over, love?” You nod, you can just leave in the morning since you don’t need to work until the afternoon shift begins. Renjun and you decide to just wash up and relax in his bed. He doesn’t need to finish the movie and you’re so tired, you probably would’ve fallen asleep again anyways. Closing his laptop, you make your way to the bathroom he shares with his roommate. Renjun always has a toothbrush prepared for you even if you didn’t sleep over most nights. It’s pretty cute and someway along you also started to pick up that habit of his for whenever he would sleep over at your dorm. That didn’t happen so often though since you share your dorm room with another girl. It’s definitely more comfortable to sleep at his place since he has a room to himself. 

While you’re in the bathroom, Renjun quickly makes his way to Jay’s room and knocks quietly. In hindsight, he could’ve also just sent him a text but whatever, Jay already opened the door. “Hey man, y/n’s gonna sleep over. Is it okay if the painting stays with you tonight?” Jay doesn’t have a problem with it. It’s just in a corner anyway, so the painting doesn’t really bother him. Having solved that problem, Renjun makes his way back into his room and starts to put the snacks away before getting you a shirt and sweatpants to wear for the night. Just in case she wants to get out of her pajama pants. Shortly after, you enter. “Here love, you can get changed if you want while I brush my teeth”, Renjun points to the clothes on the bed that he neatly laid out for you. You’ve always liked sleeping in his clothes, somehow it’s another kind of comfy. Maybe it’s because they always smell like him and how is a girl able to resist that? “Thank you Jun”, you quickly kiss his cheek before he leaves the room. Looking around you notice that Renjun already blew out the candles and sorted out his bed. After quickly changing your clothes, you grab a corner of his blanket and slip under it. 

Not even three minutes pass before he opens the door to his room. A soft smile makes its way onto Renjun’s lips as he sees you already comfy and ready in bed, waiting for him. Seems like the tiredness is slowly creeping up on you again. My poor baby. It's not even 9:30 and she’s ready to call it a day. Renjun quickly turns off his light and gets in bed next to you. You turn around to face him and his arm automatically wraps itself around your waist, pulling you a little closer. You place your hand on his chest while your head rests on his arm. Renjun slowly strokes your hair, soft eyes looking at you in the dark. After a few minutes, you snuggle a little closer to him. Cuddling him like this makes you even more sleepy. You nuzzle your face into his chest, giving him the perfect opportunity to lay a sweet kiss on top of your head. Renjun rests his cheek against the top of your head. Little words are exchanged as you welcome the comfortable and sleepy atmosphere. Except for your breathing, your heartbeats and the occasional sound of the blanket shuffling, the room is silent. You love moments like these. You love when Renjun cuddles with you, when you can feel his arms holding your body closely and his soft breath against your hair. You’ve always had a soft spot for his hugs anyway and being so close to him that you can listen to his heartbeat while feeling the warmth radiating from his body gives another level of bliss. You actually want to stay awake a little longer, want to consciously feel his body for some time more but it’s getting progressively harder for you to stay awake and Renjun sees how you struggle to. He murmurs against your hair, “Close your eyes, love. I know you had a long day” You feel another kiss on your hair and mumble an “I love you” to him before closing your eyes and letting sleep take over you. You barely manage to hear him say it back before you fully fall asleep.  

Opening your eyes the next morning, Renjun’s sleeping face greets you. His hair is kind of messy and his shirt got pulled down a bit, exposing part of his collarbones. Renjun’s arm rests on top of your hip and your feet are touching. Watching him for a few minutes, you get lost in your thoughts. There’s just something different about him in this relaxed state. It's like all the world’s stress and pressure can't get to him, like he can truly be undisturbed and there’s nothing in the world less than peace and happiness that you wish for Renjun. You know he has tendencies that make his life, especially his college life, a little more difficult than it needs to be. But honestly who knew an art major could be so demanding? You used to have this picture in your head of an art major being easy. After all, the students only need to paint stuff, right? Yeah, not exactly. Because of Renjun, you were able to glance beyond surface level and it turns out, studying art is harder than it seems. Renjun has written exams, almost weekly mini art projects for his classes, he needs to hold presentations and when exam season comes around his room is piled up with different art materials for his creative projects. It truly seems like you have to love art to study it or else you will drown. Renjun gives his all for college and you love that for him but him being a perfectionist adds another layer of difficulty to his degree. Sometimes he really needs to relax. That’s why you like seeing him resting so much. He can shut the world out and doesn’t fry his brain with details of his unfinished projects. You get to see him recovering from all the work he puts into his passion. 

You regard Renjun‘s sleeping state for a little while longer. The sun falls beautifully on him, partly on his face and hair. It highlights his slightly puffy face that he tends to get in the mornings. Your hand unconsciously reaches out and begins to stroke his hair slowly. Feeling your hand caressing his hair, Renjun stirs a little and sighs. It’s a very cute sight. Slowly opening his eyes after a few minutes, he smiles at you. Tightening his arm around your waist, you exchange a small kiss. Spending the morning with Renjun is usually a calm and loving experience. He likes to take his time in the mornings whenever he can, especially when he’s still a little sleepy. So you both spend a while wrapped in each other's arms with quiet murmurs to not disturb the morning quietness, taking in the warmth of one another before slowly getting out of bed to get ready. After eating breakfast together you need to leave to go home. Since you didn’t plan on spending the night, you plan on making a stop at your dorm, changing into a different outfit and maybe reading a little before going to work today.

As soon as you left, Renjun got his painting from Jay’s room. Today is the last day he can work on it since the painting needs to be dry for your birthday. After spending the last evening with you, Renjun feels quite good this morning. He feels like he can finish the painting in time and that he’ll like the outcome. The painting still needs details to the pond. It hopefully won’t take more than two hours. After that, Renjun still needs to add finishing touches to your gift. He starts with the pond by adding light blue highlights and a few branches that touch the water before letting the paint rest a little. In the meantime, he moves on to the finishing touches of other parts of the painting. Renjun had planned on spending the majority of today to finish your gift. Unfortunately, he can’t varnish it yet because it needs a few months to properly dry before he can put the varnish on top to fully seal it. However, for your birthday it will be enough for the painting to be dry to touch. After adding a little more detail to the trees in the background and defining a few of them a bit more, Renjun continues with the two main trees forming the heart. He decides to add some moss to the tree barks. 

However, after regarding the thin layer of moss he painted, he isn’t really satisfied. It seems a bit too flat for his liking, so he decides to try a different approach and goes to the kitchen to get some coffee. Maybe adding a few sprinkles of ground coffee into the paint will create a more natural finish. After trying it out on a paper and liking it, he uses his mixture of paint and coffee for the moss on the canvas. Looks pretty good. Being satisfied with the moss, Renjun takes a few steps away from his canvas to have a look at the pond. It doesn’t necessarily look bad but there’s still something he doesn’t like. He feels like it's kind of looking boring, which probably is because of a lack of details. That’s why for the next hour or so he spends his time perfecting the pond. In a spur of inspiration, Renjun also decides to add shadows of little fish inside the water.

Just in time for a small food break, Renjun finishes with the painting for now. He decides to come back to it after eating a bowl of ramen to regard it one last time before deciding if it’s really finished or not. Twenty minutes later, after he finished eating, Renjun stands in his room with crossed arms in front of the canvas. The window is open again, still his room very much smells like oil paints. His shirt and hands have paint on them, he truly looks like an artist in this moment. To him, there’s something strangely satisfying whenever he gets lost in painting so much that his hands and clothes show the proof. Renjun is satisfied with the outcome. It looks great. Exactly how I envisioned it. Finally. The forest looks enchanted, mysterious and doesn't have too much or too little detail. It looks like a forest one could stumble upon in a fantasy world and that’s what he was going for. She will surely like it. Smiling, Renjun starts to collect his art materials to clean them.

But suddenly, he gets a thought. I totally forgot to film! He quickly gets his camera and presses record. “Hi painters, it’s the last day of painting. Tomorrow is just for drying and then it’s y/n’s birthday. I actually already finished the painting but forgot to film it. Sorry about that. It's around 5 pm right now. Last night, y/n stayed over so I couldn’t wake up extra early to finish it. But it’s okay, I finished anyway. Have a look at the result.” Renjun turns his camera to show the canvas. “This is the finished product. I added details to the pond and some finishing touches today and I made some spontaneous decisions that turned out really well actually. ” He zooms in on the moss. “For the moss I added ground coffee into my paint. It gives it a more realistic finish, maybe give it a try some time.” Renjun laughs a little, “I think I might use this hack more often.” He turns the camera to show himself again, “I’m super satisfied with the result and actually very happy that I got finished in time. Although I wouldn’t recommend that you guys start a project this size in such a short time frame. Honestly, it was quite stressful. But I’m glad I was able to pull it off and I know for a fact that y/n’s gonna like it. Thank you guys so much for watching!” Turning his camera off, Renjun let out a happy sigh.

He didn’t immediately start editing the video though. It’s really time to take a break. Renjun just finished a big project and wants to celebrate. That’s why he quickly cleans up his room and video calls the dreamies’ group chat. Haechan is the first one to pick up “Look who came back from the dead.” Renjun laughs dryly and right after Mark joins the video chat, “Yo whats up?” Soon enough all the dreamies join and Renjun tells them about how he’s finally finished with the painting. Of course they want to see it, which is why Renjun switches to his phone’s back camera. “Dude, that looks so cool!” “I think she’s definitely gonna like it” “How come you never paint me a pic like that?” “Are you my girlfriend?”, Renjun deadpans. Haechan sulks a bit, “No.” “See. Now anyways, do you guys wanna hang out tonight?” It’s been a while since all of them hung out together anyway. “Yeah, we could try out that new Mexican restaurant near my place.” Renjun likes Jeno’s idea and everyone agrees, except for Jisung. “Guys, I have to finish an assignment by Wednesday. Can I join a bit later?” Mark reassures Jisung that his assignment was more important. “For sure dude, work on your assignment. We’ll save you a spot.” An hour later, the dreamies are sitting in the restaurant, going over the menu. Renjun thinks it’s nice to spend time together again, catching up and joking around. 

After Jisung joins, the whole group is complete and they spend the evening eating delicious food and talking. Renjun knows that he shouldn’t spend too much money there but stressful days of assignments and the painting is coming to an end and he wants to enjoy himself. That’s why he goes for dessert even when he was kinda full already. It’s okay, I deserve it. Soon, the relaxing evening comes to an end and the boys part ways. The day after tomorrow they’ll meet up at Jeno’s place to celebrate your birthday. You know it's a bit strange to celebrate your birthday at Jeno's place and you were a little hesitant at first. Of course you and Jeno are friends because of Junnie and your bestie, but not that close. Originally, you had planned to just hang out somewhere in the park but the weather has been kind of on the colder side lately. But, Jeno assured you that it’s fine. He's living alone, meaning he has enough space to host your small birthday get-together. Having some people over is nice anyway and he knows most of the people you invited. Besides the dreamies and your best friend, only two other friends of yours were expected to come. So it’s really fine for Jeno. Not to mention, his girlfriend, your bestie, would probably be somewhat upset if he said no to you. You were the person to introduce them after all. 

The next day Renjun slept in. His to do list doesn’t include much for today, mainly getting some nice wrapping for your gift. He also plans on visiting you at work again. It’s going to be a pretty simple day but he likes that his day doesn’t include any stress. Tomorrow, the day of your birthday, he’ll buy you some flowers and your favorite chocolate before meeting up with Mark. He was so nice to offer Renjun to put the painting in his car and drive to Jeno’s place together. This way he won’t need to take the painting on the subway. Renjun is pretty excited for you to see his gift. Of course he knows that you would like it but he still looks forward to your reaction. Since Jeno’s place allows for more room, Renjun plans to show up a bit earlier to decorate the place tomorrow. He excluded you from decorating on purpose and had said he was gonna handle it and so you let him. That boy can be stubborn. Renjun wants to keep his painting out of your sight for as long as he can. 

So when he and Mark arrive at Jeno’s place with your gift on the day of your birthday, Renjun puts it in Jeno’s bedroom. He knows you aren't gonna go in there, so it’s a safe spot to hide it. After making sure the painting isn’t gonna slip while he’s away, Renjun starts to prepare snack bowls and places your cake into the fridge, before helping Jeno and Mark with some balloons and a happy birthday sign. There wasn't much to prepare since you just want to spend your birthday relaxing with your friends. So soon enough, the three of them finish and around 6 pm everyone you invited is gathered on the floor around Jeno’s couch table, playing some board games and catching up. Throughout the day, Renjun films a few moments of your get-together. He wants to include your birthday party but especially your reaction to his present in his video. As the evening passes you turn to karaoke, singing songs from ABBA to Little Mix. At one point Renjun even starts to serenade you. He puts on quite a performance, singing Hot by Avril Lavigne and you totally enjoy it. It’s pretty funny actually, he’s pointing in your direction and dancing around. It’s nice seeing him so carefree. You’re kinda tempted to join and serenade him but he won't let you outperform him anyway. Besides, Renjun really has a lot of energy to spend. It’s already 8 pm, gifts still haven't been exchanged and he’s excited but also somewhat nervous for your reaction. He hopes you’ll love the painting as much as he does. However, there’s a part of him that fears he chose the wrong thing to paint but he tries to ignore that voice. You’re gonna love it, he just needs to keep on reminding himself of that.  

To say your reaction didn’t disappoint would’ve been an understatement. Renjun actually managed to hold himself in check till he was the last one left to give his gift. You really like the gifts you got this year. From a new book to new skin care you’ve been eyeing for a while, your friends put thought into them and that’s what counts and makes you happy. Two of your friends left half an hour ago, cause it’s kinda late already. The boys spontaneously had decided to sleep over at Jeno’s place, so it’s only you, your bestie and the dreamies left. “Okay, time for the finale”, for some reason, Haechan is very excited for your reaction to Renjun’s gift as well. He secretly plans to take pictures of you two. Earlier today, he also appointed Jisung to take a video. “Give me a minute, love. I’ll get your gift” Renjun squeezes your hand, giving you a smile. You look over at the boys and they just have smiles on their faces. It’s obvious that you’re gonna like the painting. Really, Renjun doesn’t have anything to worry about. A minute later, he comes back with the painting in wrapping paper. He chose one with a leaf print on it. It looks nice and maybe it could give you a bit of foreshadowing on what the gift entailed. “Happy birthday, love” Renjun sets the painting down, holding it in place and signals for you to open it. “I hope you like it” 

It’s clear that his gift was some kind of painting. Knowing Renjun, you guess that he actually painted it. “You painted for me?”, you place your hand on the gift. There was a certain smoothness to the wrapping paper. Renjun murmurs a small yes and the thought alone that he had painted you something this big was enough to make you tear up. He must’ve spent hours on this, hours just to make you happy. Sometimes you question how you were so blessed to have someone like him love you. Renjun really is giving his all to make you happy. Slowly, you unwrap the painting. Piece by piece different colors shine towards you, greens, some darker and some lighter, brown and little colorful spots. As soon as you unwrap the gift completely, you have a proper look at the painting and almost can’t believe your eyes. It’s so beautiful and perfect. You would’ve never expected such an amazing gift from him. You can’t believe Renjun would spend so much effort just for you. He put so much detail and love into the painting and it feels like you could see that from a mile away. This was the most thoughtful gift anyone ever gave you. You couldn’t possibly describe the meaning this holds for you. It’s so mesmerizing, the way the colors dance on the canvas, how he managed to portray feelings into his painting and really make it come alive. In a way it feels like the gift expresses how much Renjun loves you. 

You’re so overwhelmed and touched by the painting, the hard work and love he must’ve put into it that the only thing you can do is let out a sob. Renjun definitely didn't expect that reaction. His eyes widen and he starts to panic inside. No no no, she hates it? I should’ve chosen something else, damn it! Your hand naturally finds its way onto your mouth, more tears rolling down your cheeks while you admire the painting for a few moments more. You know Renjun has always put thought into the gifts he got you, but this really is on another level. The amount of devotion he put into making this is unbelievable. You've never seen more beautiful art than this painting and he did it with his own two hands.

Renjun’s wide-eyed gaze finds Mark’s but he also doesn’t know what to do. It’s like Renjun’s worst nightmare comes true right in front of his eyes. How could I be so stupid! Damn it! I was so sure she’s gonna like it. “Baby-”, Renjun’s ready to apologize and go buy you a better gift immediately but you don’t even give him time to finish his sentence. Throwing your arms around him, you hug him tight. “Thank you, thank you.” Four simple words and Renjun’s world stopped crumbling. He is beyond relieved. It’s like all his panicky thoughts leave his body instantly. He lets out a small laugh, hugging you back and smiling into your shoulder. You actually like it, like really like it. “It’s so beautiful. Thank you so much” Your heart almost can’t handle the thought of Renjun giving you something so precious, so beautiful. “Baby you almost gave me a heart attack.” You lean back a bit, mumbling a small sorry before placing your lips onto his. Renjun’s lips were soft and smooth like always. His kiss makes your stomach flip. He’s truly yours, not going anywhere and loving you like no other guy ever has. Renjun’s arms tighten around yours before you tilt your head a little, deepening the kiss and soon enough you hear a mixture of complaints from the boys. “Okay, what the heck” “Ew, leave that for later guys” Renjun blushes a bit, pulling away slowly. He really isn’t used to doing that in front of the boys. Pecking his lips one last time, you loosen your grip and just smile at him. “Dang,” Haechan looks at the pictures he took of you two kissing, “I really need to learn how to paint”.

a/n: excuse any painting process parts or art major parts that might be inaccurate haha, oh and if you wanna request something, I'm open to hear your idea :)

[coralinnii]

My real-life manga moments reimagined with the TWST boys 

Moments in my life that my friends said sounds like a romcom manga premise but with the Twisted Wonderland boys.  genre: fluff, humor note: I refers to me the author and could also be reader's perspective, He/him refers the Twisted Wonderland boy I think matches well with the story (though you’re free to imagine whoever)

I'm going through something like a writing slump where I'm just not satisfied with what I'm writing so I started talking to my friends to de-stress. We started talking about our high school days which is how this came to be. Apparently, I'm just airheaded enough to be a manga protagonist ^_^;

Hopefully I'll be out of my slump soon

I was our class representative and he was a prefect. We worked together in school a lot and I really respected him. Years after we graduated, he told me he respected how I was a good student and friend. I don’t have the heart to tell him that I broke quite a number of school rules but I was just never caught…

It was my first week into high school and I was quiet because I knew nobody in school. One day during P.E, I stepped into a hole and injured my foot. I was so embarrassed and I didn’t know what to do as my classmates stood around, worried about me. He, as an upperclassman, saw the commotion and offered to carry me to my classroom (we don’t have a nurse’s office). Even more embarrassed, I declined and decided to walk through my pain to get to class. Later that day, my classmates told me that he was actually a super popular and likable upperclassman and I was really lucky to meet him. 

I met him at an anime convention. I picked up an artwork he dropped and complimented him you on his choice of anime. He seemed really shy but thanked me. I later saw him again at a panel session and then at a nearby restaurant. We talked a little and even shared contacts though we never contacted each other. We used to see each other every year at the same convention until I had to move away. I always wondered how he is. 

I was alone at a nearby park waiting for my parents to pick me up from school. I had trouble making friends in my class so I was lonely. One day, I met an upperclassman who was also waiting at the park and she became my first friend. We talked everyday at the school until my parents picked me up. One day, her family picked her up first and I was shocked. He, my classmate whom I never spoke with, were my first friend’s brother. Since then, he and I keep unintentionally seeing each other. 

We were classmates for years. He was always competitive with me because I always beat him at a lot of things like test scores and school rankings. He joined the same martial arts club I was in and announced that he will surpass my belt grade soon. He also said he will grow taller than me soon since we were the same height then. Our martial arts instructor teased him saying boys always bug the ones they like. I didn’t care but rooted for him anyway. 

He did end up growing taller than me and his grades really improved. A year later, he told me he was moving to another country. Before he left, he told me he liked me…

We were classmates from beginning to end, nothing else. We always somehow got seated near each other each year. We had the same friends and from what our friends told me, we had the same interests and even taste in music. (I also dated his best friend for a while…). But we never once spoke directly to each other. I thought he didn’t like me and I was okay with that because I didn’t like or dislike him either. 

Years have passed since we graduated, I never knew what happened to him since I never bothered to know. Then one day…he followed me on Instagram

I was waiting for the bus and so was he. He seemed confused and I thought that maybe he wasn't from around here. Then, he came up to me and with an accent, he asked me if a particular bus had already passed by. I answered no and he seemed relieved then said… 

“Thank you. Also, you have a beautiful voice” 

I was stunned speechless as he just walked back to his previous spot.

[maverick-werewolf]

Werewolf Article - (Play As A) Werewolf Video Games

The results of the poll for this month on my Patreon are in, and the winner is an opinionated article on werewolf video games! Apologies in advance if any of my opinions here anger you. I was asked for opinionated, so I went opinionated and did not hold back.

For clarity's sake: this will be a relatively concise list of SOME video games in which you can or do play as a werewolf. It will NOT include every single game in which you can or do play as a werewolf, nor will it include certain kinds of playable werewolves that exist in gaming, for the sake of brevity. You'll notice some missing and then want to be first to tell me I left out [thing], but I assure you I am aware of those too. I am also not going to list games in which you can play as a werewolf but it requires either user-made mods or else playing in a custom campaign/tileset/server (like Neverwinter Nights <3), only games wherein you can play as a werewolf as part of base game or expansion pack mechanics.

This IS a tiered list. It is tiered based on the werewolf gameplay mechanics and elements in the game.

Let's get started. I will begin at #9, go to #1, and then I will close with some words on some other games that didn't make the numbered list.

9. World of Warcraft: Cataclysm

Note: your player character will never have torn-up clothing or use his claws like in this artwork/like the enemy worgen do

I'm just going to list Cataclysm here because, frankly, I don't even want to discuss WoW at Shadowlands and beyond... even if discussing the model update will reach into that era of content. Obviously, I don't play WoW anymore and haven't in quite a while, but yeah, I used to really enjoy it. Played it for many, many years. Probably too many.

Cataclysm was a pretty outright bad expansion, but it did add playable worgen (something I obviously wanted from day 1 after seeing the worgen mobs running around), and they can even turn into human form, which is a must for me in terms of actually being a werewolf instead of just a wolf-person, which I wouldn't even roll. That was a nice touch I didn't actually expect from the devs.

Unfortunately, the model update turned them into something far "cuter" and more cuddly than I liked, not to mention adding preposterous fur options like stripes and merle, but the human form customization was nice. Still, the model update drove me toward playing different races, like maining my kul'tiran and night elf instead of the worgen I was always ultimately pretty disappointed in, given his wearing fine armor and wielding giant weapons. Anyway, the entire game took a huge nosedive not long after the model change, so it's a moot point for me regardless.

As for the deeper worgen lore beyond "they are werewolves with a funny name": I hate it with all my heart. I did my best to ignore every scrap of that and how they are just self-parodies, to delete the Gilneas/worgen starting zone quests from my entire brain, and especially to ignore the fact that they were all preposterously British despite England being one of the last places historically to even have many werewolf legends of its own. I have an article about that here if you are interested in the topic. The game made all of these things very difficult, especially how hard they wanted to drive home that the worgen are silly posh British parody dog-people strutting around in waistcoats and tophats instead of being fearsome cursed werewolves. So I won't bother going into all that.

The mechanics are fun except for the fact that you have to wear armor and use weapons, so ultimately you just look like a beast-person instead of a werewolf, especially after the model change making them far more appealing to a certain demographic. If Blizzard had wanted to put in effort, they would have made your gear look tattered and would have made you swap to claws when you turn, but that would've been a lot of work. They could have at least added a specialized class or something and then also given it to some Horde races to make the precious Horde players happy. I don't know. I just think werewolves wearing fine clothes and armor and wielding weapons is immensely silly. They're supposed to be werewolves.

So while they are extremely far from perfect, the worgen are at least relatively fun in that, if nothing else, you can go between werewolf and human forms and run on all fours as fast as the fastest ground mount, and I am deeply surprised they did either. I immensely enjoyed both of those things during my time playing a worgen, and they helped mitigate the great disappointment otherwise in many other regards - though not enough to keep me from maining other races, especially later on. But, in the end, WoW sucks now and it's unrecoverable, and WoW Classic is a joke, so I'll never be playing a worgen again anyway.

8. Diablo II

I'm sure you were looking for this one - the werewolf druid in Diablo II (preemptive sidebar: I am not going to talk about Diablo IV). I love his design and gameplay mechanics. He's fantastic. However, he is of course yet another instance of "the werewolf must be a druid," which I personally find a little tiresome after so much of it. But hey, this was one of the earlier games to do that, so it predated a lot of the craze.

At any rate, the Druid class in Diablo II obviously gets a werewolf form. It also gets a requisite werebear because werewolves can almost never just be werewolves, but at least the werewolf does not completely suck. You can also summon wolves, which is a bonus.

While I'm not really that big on Diablo-type gameplay - I prefer either third-person or else a proper isometric, party-based RPG - so Diablo II didn't really hold my interest a lot, the werewolf druid is very fun and a very cool werewolf, the setting is great, and the werewolf suits the dark Gothic feeling and look of the game that is enjoyable and well conveyed in the first place. The werewolf druid is a great addition that I am glad they added.

7. Baldur's Gate II

Let me make something perfectly clear: Baldur's Gate II is, in my opinion, the best game ever made (only Uncharted 2: Among Thieves also makes this rank for me). Combined with BG1 to create the Baldur's Gate Saga, it is one of the best stories ever told and also my favorite game mechanics-wise, again alongside Uncharted 2 even if yes, I know that those games could almost not be farther apart in terms of mechanics. I absolutely love BG2 beyond words. Please note I am talking about the original Baldur's Gate II, as released in 2000, not the "Enhanced Edition," which is a disgrace to the game, the entire series, and a piece of garbage. It's shamefully difficult to find the original game anymore, but it's worth it over playing the EE; trust me. I'll try to spare you any further ranting on this topic, as the original Baldur's Gate Saga is something very close to my heart.

Anyway, the werewolf in BG2 is - once again - a druid, specifically a druid subclass called Shapeshifter. It doesn't really have any werewolf gameplay mechanics in that you are not treated differently for it, nor do you transform out of your own control. In fact you will be spending the majority of your time in werewolf form, which can get quite tiresome. I'm not the biggest fan of a werewolf holding normal conversations with NPCs, etc. But regardless, it's there, and I love it, and it looks awesome, and that's more than I can say for so many games. Plus, you get cool bonuses and stuff. The power of it varies over time and with the progression of your character. I will not go too deeply into it, as I am actually an insane D&D video game nerd and even today I can spend far too much time building characters and tweaking numbers and doing ridiculous tricks in D&D games to powergame. If you want just one of my credentials I beat BG2 on the hardest difficulty with Ascension and no other gameplay mods. Long story short, the Greater Werewolf is quite powerful, and it shouldn't be a detriment to your party to either be one or bring along Cernd, one of my favorite companions.

So don't listen to the people down on the Shapeshifter in BG2. You can get mods that make them overpowered, anyway. Also don't listen to my complaints about it not feeling werewolfish enough because that's nearly impossible to come by anyway if you're not playing the #1 game on this list. Go try one out. It's fun! Plus, BG2 is the best game ever made.

6. Altered Beast

What are some of Mav's favorite things? Ancient Greece, hoplites, hot men, werewolves, dragons, tigers...

When I found out Altered Beast exists and is a game wherein you play as an awesome hoplite dude and turn into a werewolf, a green dragon, a tiger-man, and ultimately a werewolf is still the most powerful of all his forms, I was ecstatic. I had to play it immediately.

I wasn't disappointed. It's a fun, unforgiving game, because it was made before video games started becoming what I think we're supposed to call accessible today. I don't know what else there is to say about the game if what I've already said hasn't convinced you to play it. The werewolf form is your first transformation, and your most powerful is a golden werewolf. Me being me, I appreciate that a werewolf form is still the best in the end instead of being outshone by other creatures, and even the other forms available are all very cool.

As I said, I really don't know what more one could ask for of this setting and gameplay. I've never been picky about genre; I play a very wide variety of video games and have plenty of fun, and I certainly had fun with this one.

(Note: I'm not going to talk about that 2005 Altered Beast remake, I like to pretend it never happened)

5. Werewolf the Apocalypse: Earthblood

I'll be the first to admit I'm far from the biggest World of Darkness fan ever, as has brought many insults my way already, but I was pleasantly surprised by the mechanics of the werewolf form in Earthblood. I will not call it the "crinos form," as that terminology is so immensely silly that I could no longer take it seriously if I did. So anyway, the gameplay actually lets you feel like a werewolf, and you even get two stances you can swap between for different combat styles instead of anchoring werewolves down to just doing one thing. I'm not going to wax on about the lore, the story, etc. - but man the werewolf mechanics really are fun. It is, of course, the main draw of the whole deal, and they didn't slouch on that element.

It's important to me that a werewolf feel powerful and also violent. Werewolves should not be cuddly, or else they are no longer werewolves. Painting hallways with the blood of my enemies as if I'm recreating the Ninja lead-up in Metal Gear Solid while in werewolf form is cathartic and a good way to give the player a sense of being a werewolf instead of just an animal-headed person. This is a very solid "play as a werewolf" game, and one of the few games that exist with the primary purpose of letting you really play as a werewolf, whether you are a predetermined character or not. Be warned, the game is notoriously janky, but if you're like me, you're enjoying the werewolf mechanics enough that you don't care - or you can be even more like me and not give a toss about "jankiness" in a game in the first place.

4. The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

While a significant and crushing downgrade from the werewolves in certain other Elder Scrolls entries - more on that momentarily - at least Skyrim let you become a werewolf in the base game. No waiting for an expansion pack and no waiting forever until you move on (thanks, Oblivion). However, the differences between the mechanics of werewolves in past entries and the Skyrim werewolves are many and tragic. I confess I did not play Skyrim much, partially as a result of these exact elements, and partially because I just don't spend much time playing video games anymore, among other things.

In Skyrim, being a werewolf becomes what is colloquially called an "awesome button," letting you turn into a big, strong, cool werewolf that can eat people to extend your werewolf timer. It's great and enjoyable, don't get me wrong, but it doesn't actually feel as if you are truly cursed with lycanthropy or smelly lupus or whatever silly name Elder Scrolls gave it (yes, I know the name, but that doesn't make it less silly). You have no real disadvantages to being a werewolf, such as having to worry about when you will transform outside your own control - because you never will, which is an immense downgrade in terms of feeling werewolfish and adding appropriate challenge and downside to being a werewolf. You also don't have to worry about being forced to devour a civilized race in order to sate your accursed hunger. Instead, you're doing that on purpose to turn out of werewolf form again, because the more you eat, the longer you stay transformed. Still, the werewolves in Skyrim are good - they just don't compare to previous entries. But I certainly appreciate them and the fact that they are present in the base game.

3. The Sims 3

Trust me, they do look better in game, but I couldn't find any of my own screenshots because it's been a hot minute since I played this.

You probably think I'm trolling you, but the werewolves in The Sims have always been pretty fun; I remember when the ones in 2 first came out, I enjoyed them like crazy. The ones in 3 rocked and were easily the best variant; too bad the game is relatively difficult to get running properly, and many aspects of the werewolves are delicate and easy to glitch, including your entire Sim's werewolf form design. I am not going to talk about those abominations that were added to The Sims 4, because they are some of the worst things I have ever had the misfortune of seeing and are not werewolves by any metric.

Sims 3 changed the aspects of Sims 2 werewolves that I didn't like, such as how being a werewolf altered your sim's entire personality over time and how the werewolf form always looked the same. They made the system much more robust. Frankly, the Sims 3 werewolves are some of the better werewolves in gaming, especially for the kind of game that The Sims is (expect assorted dog jokes, for example, given it's The Sims, yet it still isn't half as bad as it could be). I also love the wolf-man design; it works much better with Sims than something bigger and more wolfish. Certainly far better than whatever the hell is in Sims 4, which again, I will try my best not to talk about.

Anyway, I absolutely recommend Sims 3 if you enjoy Sims games and werewolves and want to have some werewolf fun. I'd probably still be occasionally blowing my finite amount of time on this earth playing it if I had it properly running on my current PC.

2. The Elder Scrolls II: Daggerfall

Bet you didn't expect to see this one, did you? You thought I was gonna say Skyrim as #2, right? Actually, I bet you thought I was going to say that one as #1.

The Elder Scrolls II: Daggerfall is a game many would consider unapproachable today. I enjoyed it. Obviously, I played it for the playable werewolf, and I had fun! They work similarly to the ones in Bloodmoon, but, in my opinion, they still aren't as fantastic as the Bloodmoon ones. But the game does force you to actually live and behave as a werewolf - I love the werewolf hunter[s] mechanic - which, again... it's almost the only one of its kind other than Bloodmoon. For that, it gets #2 on this list.

And that means you know what makes #1, untouched in its glory, undimmed by time...

1. The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind - Bloodmoon

Alright. Have I ever talked about how this is the single greatest werewolf game ever made? I think I have, but let's get into it again.

I like Morrowind in the first place. I think it's hands down the best of the Elder Scrolls series and, frankly, the only one really worth dedicating much time to (forgive me). I played it when it first came out, and while I have never been the kind of person to pour hours into any ES or even any other open world game, Morrowind held my attention even as a kid - before I knew about "open world" and before it was such a buzzword - whereas other games before and after it struggled to do so or else failed entirely. Morrowind was groundbreaking for its time in many ways. And then they announced the expansion pack called Bloodmoon that would let you play as a werewolf. I was so excited I could hardly stand it, and even with my extreme werewolf pickiness, I was not disappointed. At all.

This is a game wherein the werewolves are treated as a serious threat, they are insanely rare to encounter in the wild in any capacity (I actually became a werewolf through a random encounter because I ran around on Solstheim obsessively every night rather than just becoming one through the story - it took me many nights, IRL, to encounter one), and when you do run into them, they are likely to destroy you. You are insanely, over the top powerful when you turn into a werewolf, yourself. Some would even call it stupid. I would not. You run at the speed of light and your jump turns into borderline flight. It's basically gliding. You're also preposterously powerful in general. I love it.

Most importantly of all, however, is that you are actually forced to roleplay as a werewolf. You will turn each night, and you must consume 1 victim NPC of any of the playable races. Solstheim is full of assorted enemies that will work for this, but when you go back to Vvardenfell, it can be harder to find a nightly meal while avoiding devouring any quest NPCs. Plus, you have to manage your gear before and after transformations, and you have to be sure you are never witnessed transforming. The entire system is in-depth and very awesome, making you actually feel like a cursed being that has to worry when the sun starts to set, forcing you to run far from civilization.

I cannot put into words how much I adore this game's werewolf system. Nothing compares. This is a real werewolf system, instead of "play as a wolf-person" or "hit the awesome button to become a werewolf for a little while with 0 consequences" like basically every other werewolf game out there.

So long story short, if you claim to love werewolves and want to play as one in a video game, and you haven't played Bloodmoon, then you're lying to yourself and the whole world. Shame on you.

And now for things that didn't make the list...

10. Assorted Acknowledgements

This category is for ones I don't even really have a lot to say about, but I figured I would mention them.

Terraria - You can get an item that lets you turn into a werewolf when night falls. It's pretty fun! I like the mechanics of it, plus it has a neat werewolf design, to boot. I dock serious points in this game for straight-up replacing the zombies with hordes of werewolves in hard mode, though. "Werewolf infestations" and werewolves being zombie stand-ins these days is preposterous and overdone. But I had a lot of fun running around as a werewolf and exploring, so it's absolutely top of the non-tiered list especially as far as werewolf mechanics go.

Pillars of Eternity - The "werewolf" in this game is one of several animal-person forms the druid can get, continuing the common theme in gaming of druid werewolves. The wolf is decidedly the worst of the lot, less useful even than the prey animals available. Put bluntly: they are basically terrible, and you're an idiot to ever use this form when there are so many build options available. There are also lots of other RPG options available. As in other games out there in the world. You should play those instead.

Guild Wars 2 - You cannot actually play as a werewolf in Guild Wars 2, but I figured I would mention it because lots of people do. If you want to roll one of the Norn giant race, either as a pretty giant woman who is the mommy stepping on you from some men's dreams or as the ugly tiny-headed cartoon men, you can get an ability to turn into a werewolf for like 30 seconds; it's far from exciting. And like so many werewolf abilities today, it comes with the option to also turn into other humanoid animals with different abilities. I've heard that, of them, only the cat and bear are useful, which is not a shocker as video game logic goes (game devs think wolves straight up suck at everything lol). I didn't play a Norn during my stint with Guild Wars 2 - I played a male human. He's Nolan North, so he's obviously the only choice and also why I played the game as much as I did.

The Elder Scrolls Online - This disgraceful abomination of a "game" is terrible in every way and could not have been a bigger disappointment on the promise of an "Elder Scrolls but MMORPG" concept even from the very beginning. It was never good, it only ever got worse, and I am happy to say I abandoned it long ago (I am not happy to say I was playing it in early closed beta because of the promise of werewolves - and I played it far more than I should have, so I am not coming at this from ignorance). It is a game with designs so ugly and unremarkable that you want to quit and walk through the woods just to remind yourself beauty still exists in the world. ESO clearly had no idea what direction to take itself in from the moment it dropped, and it certainly was never created with the pretense of playing like an Elder Scrolls game but being massively multiplayer. It has no sense of mood or atmosphere whatsoever and possesses writing that will make you long for the riveting tales in other low-rent, low-thought MMORPGs. You can play as a hideous weird sad werewolf model that is absurdly small (most likely smaller than the race you are playing as, which means you actually shrink when you transform) and should have been left in beta, which functions like a worse awesome button werewolf than the ones in Skyrim, because you also suck gameplay-wise especially depending on the dev's mood with the meta. It is terrible, as is everything about the game. ESO also went out of its way to completely wreck all previous Elder Scrolls werewolf lore that was actually really good. Anyway, don't play this. Your time is worth more than that, even if you don't think it is.

That covers some of the best! Requisite apologies if I didn't include your favorite.

( Free Newsletter  — Patreon — Wulfgard — Werewolf Fact Masterlist — Twitter — Vampire Fact Masterlist — Amazon Author page )

[xxxchuuyaslovexxx]

Dazai and Chuuya with a s/o that draws on their skin

Headcanons + scenario for Dazai and Chuuya

Warnings: None~

Word count: 1.1k

Dazai

Dazai absolutely loves it when you draw on your hands and arms. He thinks it's cute

Would definitely tease you about it like: 'Well well my baby draws on their hands like a bored kid in class. You like being naughty huh?'

Dazai thinks it's funny how you try to hide it and your face heats up

Secretly wants you to draw on his skin as well. And if you do… well you can tell he is the happiest man alive.

He would also steal your pen if he wants to annoy you just to draw at you as well

He does that because 'it's only fair'

I feel like he would write his name with a heart <3 

Actually for the both of you it's a some kind of a love language 

But take care he will get jealous if you draw on anyone else. He is the only one to deserve your love.

Scenario: 

'How is my Belladonna doing?' Dazai enters the room as you sit there trying to focus on some research you had to do for your work. Keyword: Tried.

Actually you were lost in your thoughts as you drew hearts and flowers on your hand. 

Dazai is actually used to walk into this kind of scene. He knows that you can't focus on work for too long. 'It's like living with a little child.' he often thinks to himself.

As soon as you noticed Dazai entered the room you tried to hide your hands, even though you knew he already saw it.

'Osamu uhm… Hey, how was your day?' You asked hoping he wouldn't tease you about it.

'Well not as boring as yours I guess.' He smirks at you as he makes his way to your desk. 

You hide your face behind your hands only for your loved one to admire them. He loves all the work you put into your drawings and he tells you every time only for you to be too humble to accept his compliments.

'Wow. Every time I see your artworks they are more beautiful than the ones before. But you know what?' He asks in a playful tone 'I can make art as well.'

—--------

'Osamuuuu. Will it take any longer? I still have work to do.' Dazai insisted on drawing something on you but under one condition: you have to keep your eyes shut. That wasn't a problem if he wouldn't take so long.

'I will be done any moment Belladonna. Just one last stroke. Here you go. Now look!'

You opened your eyes to take a look at Dazais finished work. It was a whole paragraph of text and hearts all around it. 

The first sentence was: 'I love you my Belladonna<3'. You looked at him with big eyes and answered shyly: 'I love you too Osamu.' 

He smiled at you and kissed your lips softly. 'C'mon read all of it.' 

Your gaze fell back onto your arm.

'I'm sorry I don't have that much time for you. The work in the ADA is crazy right now. I hope you can forgive me. I will try my best to spend more time with you in the future. I want you to know that you are the best thing that ever happened to me. You are kind, smart and also very talented. I feel like I don't tell you often enough but you are my everything and I would never want to lose you.'

You smiled to yourself. You didn't know he could be that nice. Normally he is always a big tease and annoys you. 

But your face suddenly dropped as you read the last line: 

'PS.: I broke our washing machine. <3'

Chuuya

Actually it takes Chuuya some time to realize your habits because of the Mafia he doesn't have much time for you

But after some time being with you he notices the little doodles on you hands and arms

As he asks you where you got them from you explain to him that you draw on your skin when you are bored

Chuuya doesn't say much about it but he secretly thinks it is cute

But Chuuya being Chuuya he would never admit it.

He just pretends he doesn't care much about it

But you notice when his gaze lingers on you drawings and he sometimes even stares at them

When you draw on his hands he will tell you it's annoying but you know him better than that

He secretly admires his hands with your doodles or cute little notes on it when he thinks you are not around

What he doesn't know is that you know all of it because the other PM members told you about it

Scenario: 'Chuuuuu, how long will it take? Paperwork is so boring! You wanted to spend a day with me…'

You sit with Chuuya in his office as you draw something on a piece of paper.

Even though Chuuya promised to spend some time with you, he is still occupied with a lot of paperwork.

You understood that his work was important. But more important than you?

'I know babe I'm sorry. Let me… HEY!' He snaps as he takes the piece of paper you were drawing on and turns it around. On the "backside" there was a text written on it.

'You fucking dumbass! I will have to rewrite it now. I don't have time for this.' The short man hissed as he tried his best to stay calm.

'Here.' He gets out of his coat and moves his arm towards you. 'Draw on me before you can destroy any more of my works.'Chuuyas pretended to be annoyed but secretly he enjoyed having your personal marks on his skin.It's a win-win situation.

—----

After another hour Chuuya sights in relief. He was finally done.

He looked at your figure hoovered over his forearm. You were so concentrated that you didn't even notice he was already done.

He didn't want to disturb you so he waited until you moved your head up to admire your own work.

Chuuya also looks at it.

All over his arm you wrote 'I LOVE YOU <3' in beautiful letters. It looked like a tattoo on his skin. He is stunned and a sudden feeling hits him. His face heats up.

'I love you too. I'm sorry I don't have that much time to spend with you. And that I'm always stressed out. Do you think I'm too rough with you?'

He looked at you worried.

'Sometimes you are but that's why I love you. I fell in love with Chuuya Nakahara. The only person I will ever love. And I love all of you. So don't worry about such things.'

Chuuya smiled to himself. He once again remembered why he loved you. He leaned over to kiss you.

'Thank you.' he whispered.

Thank you for reading. If you have any advice don't hesitate to tell me <3

[ryuichirou]

I wanna start with I love your blog sm and I’m not trying to jump on the train, in fact I don’t even mind if you just read this and don’t post or even just delete after you read, but I know where the “Rook gaslighter” thing comes from and wanted to explain (I also just LOVE talking about rook even if its negative). Im not explaining to change your mind but rather to inform!! Because I love spending hours analyzing the characters, pls don’t stop drawing rook!! Ever!!

ANYWAYS now that “please don’t hate me I have to uncontrollably explain everything about my favorite character(s) the second someone doesn’t know about one small detail 😭” is over, I will explain! During Vil’s lab wear vignette, Rook asks Vil when he’s going to start his new diet. Vil, confused, is like what??? Tf?? And rook is like “yeah :D you have put on 3 pounds exactly :)”. Vil is lowkey like wtf Rook I haven’t noticed shit and rook is like “okayyy but who do you believe? Me or literally anyone else?” And vil is like “yeah you’re right, I’ll adjust my diet, thank you rook”.

The ‘issue’ with the “rook is a gaslighter” is it’s SOLELY a fandom thing (and maybe with other characters, but still, like. Vil is a world class model he CANT put on weight like a normal person could because it’ll unfortunately affect his career. The beauty world is just like that, irl too. Plus, this is something he wants for himself, even if he admits to hating the diets during his overblot, it’s still a part of who he is). Vil, himself, views rook’s behavior as a helpful thing, he appreciates Rook’s supernaturally keen eye! He might be offended but ultimately he would not have Rook as his vice-prez if he didn’t respect or admire Rook in some way.

I adore the way you draw them together!! The one where vil is like “how dare you! Just because he’s strange doesn’t mean he’s like that!” And rook is behind him with blood on his face, he’s so cute! I recently found another blog that is similar to yours that I also wanted to see if you knew bc they draw rook out the same way you do! @/fadiesismin is so cool and I think you’d love their artwork!!! Also I’m very sorry for the long-winded ask, in my defense, I’m also a Sagittarius. Rook 🫶 Me, xoxoxoxoxo!!

Sagittarius Anon! I’m sorry it took this long to reply.

First of all, thank you for enjoying our stuff and for your support! I am very happy that you like the way we portray RookVil. Their relationship is very interesting and honestly quite nuanced; we don’t usually gravitate towards ships that have this strong of a “they’ve been dating for a while” vibe, but these two are just too charming. Probably because despite them deeply understanding each other and sharing a lot of values and passions, they really aren’t a perfect couple, and we get to see it in moments like the vignette you’ve mentioned, or Rook’s lab wear vignette, or on multiple other occasions. Rook isn’t the perfect boyfriend, in fact, he is quite a menace sometimes without really meaning harm (still, he technically made Vil cry at least once); but there also isn’t another person that would get Vil as deeply as Rook does and support him as well as Rook does. What they have is special, but isn’t perfect at all.

As you already know, we also love talking about characters a lot, so I even though I am late with this reply, I am happy to have an opportunity to talk about these two and Rook specifically. So thank you for sending this ask and waiting!

I’ve seen this vignette being used as an example of Rook being gaslighting/manipulative before, and to be honest, I don’t really get this argument. I understand that the reasoning is usually that Rook sounds similar to a man that lies to his girlfriend about her being fat because he wants her to be even skinnier or just to be an asshole about it, but here is the thing: this isn’t what Rook is doing though. Gaslighter always has ulterior motive behind their manipulations, even if it’s just to mess with someone else’s head for fun or to control this person. But with Rook (both in this vignette and in general), what you see is what you get: the man is brutally honest, sometimes even too honest. Vil himself is very aware of that and has mentioned it multiple times.

It’s just like you said! Vil never lets anyone forget that his looks are important to him (both because of his own standards and because he is a model), so of course Rook would comment on something that he noticed. This is the foundation of their relationship: Rook gives Vil his feedback because Rook sees things that other people don’t. Does it mean that this feedback is always 100% necessary and Vil should change things according to how Rook critiques him? Of course not. Maybe sometimes it would be better for Vil to just take it easy and relax instead of perfecting every single thing, but this isn’t what Vil wants for himself: he doesn’t want to be pampered, he wants to be appreciated for his hard work. Rook enables Vil’s perfectionism, but don’t forget that Rook is that force in Vil’s life that doesn’t let him forget what he is doing all that for (I’ve talked about Rook being protective of Vil’s “beauty” = love for art here). Vil having a toned body is something that Rook enjoys, but this is mainly something that Vil wants himself; I kind of think that as long as Vil’s passionate and unapologetic about things that he does, Rook would find beauty in him no matter how he looks. Remember him at the end of ch6 after Vil’s grandpafication? Yeah exactly.

Alright, I digress. The point I am trying to make is that Rook is very direct with Vil, sometimes even too direct, and this is the opposite of gaslighting. Even when he suggests things “lightly”, he is still upfront about them: he doesn’t try to plant any ideas in Vil’s head.

Rook sounds and acts like a jerk sometimes, but he means well, and it’s not an excuse, just a fact. In Rook’s head, Vil always takes his direct remarks and observations very well, what’s so different this time? Even if you’ve been with someone for years, fuckups are unavoidable, especially for someone who has problems with tact.

To reiterate: could this scene be triggering or upsetting? Absolutely. Are there people who comment on other’s weight to make them insecure or make them doubt themselves? Absolutely. Is this what Rook does? Absolutely not. It just isn’t true to his character: he wouldn’t gain anything if Vil started doubting himself, in fact, he would have hated it. He doesn’t want Vil to be insecure or unsure, this is literally what he confronted him about at the end of Ch5. He also doesn’t need to do anything for Vil to trust him more than others: Vil already does. When he was saying that he knew better than anyone or anything else, he stated the truth, and this is what so fucked up about Rook: he really does know better.

It’s very important to remember that these characters have their own circumstances and their own writing, and we are fucking blessed to have a cast of characters this interesting and complex.

By the way, I am saying all of this as someone who wouldn’t mind Rook being a gaslighter and could see fanon scenarios where it could work, but those need to be very well-written not to ruin his character, because honesty is an integral part of Rook Hunt. For better or worse.

Also, I know you haven’t mentioned Jade, Anon, but since this entire discussion started with comparing the two, I wanted to note that Jade’s Dorm Uniform vignette exists. Vil literally looked at him man and decided not to trust him for one moment, even scolded Rook for even humouring the idea that Jade was telling the truth. And this is just one instance; we are constantly being reminded by everyone in cast about the fact that Jade is shady and we shouldn’t take seriously the majority of things that he says (pretty much verbatim to what Floyd said about him in the Playful Land event). Jade doesn’t care about honesty, he doesn’t care about lying either: all he cares about is what to say to make the others react in the most interesting way possible. He loves messing with people, and the world is his playground….

(I am also pretty sure that he comments on Azul’s diet; this has nothing to do with gaslighting either, just thought I’d mention that since we’re talking about this)

Anyways, thank you again for your ask, Anon! I hope this wasn’t an exhausting read. I always feel like I haven’t said everything that I wanted to say, but fortunately I still have tons of replies to write, so I’ll have my chance..! Probably.

PS. @/fadiesismin’s works are very good!!

[bookyeom]

minghao + “I noticed.”

Sorry this took me so long my friend!!! Here you go!

A/N: If you read and enjoy this, please reblog and/or send a comment! I’d love to know what you think.

Pairing: Minghao x Reader Word Count: 1.5k Warnings: swearing, art slander

Rembrandts, Monets, Picassos, Cézannes. Art pieces you’ve been dying to see since you were young and dreamed of Europe, all replicated in full and brought together in one spot for you to be in awe of.

And yet all you can do is make googly eyes at the man next to you, and hope he doesn’t notice.

Minghao, your classmate. The one you’d had a crush on since he sat next to you in your Race, Gender and Sexuality in Art seminar. The one who had snorted under his breath at a pretentious comment made by your balding, white, British professor, and who had subsequently made the professor look stupid when he’d been called out. You were impressed at the audacity of the dark-haired boy, and you’d told him so. A simple ‘nice one’ was what you’d whispered after the scene had died down, and you’d been rewarded with a smile and a giggle so different from the persona he presented that it had stunned you. (You hadn’t done much but stare at him for a solid minute after he thanked you and turned back to the lesson, so confused as you were by this boy that you’d never met before in your life.)

Since that first day, you’d sat next to each other, and you’d quickly decided that your new goal for the semester was not to get good grades – it was to make Xu Minghao laugh. 

“Why is this class about race and gender being taught by an old, white man anyway?” He’d asked under his breath another day, and the snort you’d involuntarily let out was rewarded with another giggle from him. The amount of times the two of you have been shushed by your professor has quickly gotten out of hand, but you don’t care. Minghao tends to say exactly what you’re thinking, and you’re in awe of how easily he’s able to verbalize his thoughts. You’re in awe of him for a lot of reasons, actually; he’s good at art, he’s intelligent, he’s hilarious.

He’s also terribly cute, which has proven to be entirely devastating for you.

You’re friends, of that much you were sure, but you never could really read into it much more than that. The two of you had exchanged phone numbers early on, sending messages mostly about your homework at first, but it had quickly progressed into jokes about your professor and had snowballed from there. Soon after, the flirting had begun, and you had been incredibly confused and unsure because he had been so Minghao about it all.

Then one evening you’d gotten a text from him that read: ‘Do you want to go out with me to the City Art Show tomorrow? I got two tickets,’ and you’d nearly shit yourself. 

Y/N (7:56pm): just us two?

Hao (7:57pm): that’s usually what a date is, yeah ;)

And now here you are, almost exactly 24 hours later, entirely unable to focus on some of your favourite artwork because of him. It isn’t your fault that he looks so good. He always does, but you’ve never seen him like this before – dressed up far more than his usual baggy hoodie, looking every bit like your art hoe dream boyfriend. What are you supposed to do other than look?

Thankfully, you manage to make it out of the museum without him calling you out on it, much to your relief. He suggests a walk, and you’re grateful for the fresh air, trying your best to suppress all thoughts of holding his hand as you stroll. The two of you eventually find a bench, and you’re fidgeting with your fingers when he speaks up.

“Did you like the museum?”

“Yeah,” you reply quickly. Wish I’d gotten to see more of it without you distracting me, you gorgeous motherfucker. 

“What was your favourite part?”

“Um…” You wrack your brain in an attempt to remember something, anything, about what you’d seen. “The Monet one?” 

You watch as Minghao’s face falls. “Oh… yeah.”

“You know, the one with the flowers?” Why are you still talking?

“Right,” Minghao says, monotone, and you really wish you could melt into one of the puddles on the ground below you. It’s silent, and he doesn’t try again, and you turn towards him abruptly.

“Minghao,” you say, a little desperate, and you hope he can’t tell that you’re sinking right now as you try to come up with something to explain yourself. “I don’t know if you noticed, but I wasn’t really looking at the artwork much–”

“I noticed,” Minghao says resignedly. “That’s too bad. I really thought you’d like the exhibit.”

“I did,” you try to explain, but you know there’s no real way out of this without telling him the truth. “I mean, I tried to! I just didn’t… absorb much of it. I’m tired, I think, and I–”

“It’s okay,” Minghao says with a shrug that you think is meant to appear nonchalant, but you can tell he’s dejected by the way he’s leaning back against the bench, arms crossed in front of him. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not for everyone.”

You stare at him for a moment, brain running a million miles a minute. Then you snap.

“Oh my god, Minghao,” you whine, “I’ve been dying to come here. When you asked me, I almost levitated. I wanted to look at it all, but I couldn’t stop looking at you the whole time!”

Minghao blinks.

You blink back.

You’re absolutely mortified. 

Your hands fly up to cover your face, willing for the ground beneath your feet to open up and swallow you whole. 

“Hey,” he says, and you suddenly register the soft squeak of his giggle. 

You peer over at him through your fingers to find him absolutely beaming. Was he laughing at you? You hide behind your hands again, trying to figure out how best to escape this disaster. 

“Come on,” he tries again, “look at me.” 

You can hear him smiling.

You startle as you feel fingers gently curl around your wrists, but you don’t resist as Minghao gently pulls your hands down and away from your face. He lets go once he can see you again, one of his hands lifting to scratch at his ear, and you can’t help but watch the movement. Are the tips of his ears red?

“I’m sorry,” he starts, and you can tell he’s trying not to smile again as the corners of his mouth turn up. “I just really thought you were bored the whole time,” he explains, and you know you’re in for it when he smirks. “I have to say, I find this reason much more interesting.”

You groan, and he giggles again, and you hate how damn cute he is. 

“I’m going to go and hide my face forever now,” you announce, rising onto your feet so quickly that you almost trip. 

“Hey,” Minghao protests. He’s fast to stand up, too, catching your elbow before you can eat shit. “Don’t do that.” You look up at him in question, and he adds, “...Professor Mackenzie is going to miss you if you hide your face forever.” 

You gape at him for a second, and then you’re turning on your heel and getting ready to make a run for it.

You don’t make it very far before his hand finds your sleeve, pulling you back, and you’re surprised when you find yourself flush against his chest. He’s laughing, but his arms are around you as he squeezes you in a quick hug before he’s letting you go, so fast you can barely process, his hands on your arms as he grins down at you.

“I’m sorry,” he tries, and you pout involuntarily. “I was distracted in there too, you know.”

You scoff. “Sure.” 

“I’ve come here before, so I didn’t need to focus so much on the art,” Minghao continues, ignoring you. “What I had to focus on this time was not looking at you.”

It takes you a minute to process his words. “You’re just saying that because I said it first,” you finally say after a minute, ignoring the fluttering in your chest at the thought, and Minghao shakes his head.

“It’s true. I always feel like that when you’re around – in class, too. And you look really pretty today.”

You have to physically stop your mouth from falling open. What the hell?

“Oh,” is all you manage, and then he’s biting back a smile again.

“Yeah, oh,” he returns, squeezing your arms fondly. “So if you can forgive me for not focusing tonight because I was looking at you, then I’ll forgive you for it, too.”

“Deal.” You stick out your hand and he shakes it with another giggle. You feel a cheeky smile finding its way onto your own lips as you add, “And don’t worry about me not seeing the art… I found another subject far more riveting anyway.” 

Your new goal: to make Xu Minghao blush more often.

Tags: @savventeen @wqnwoos @starsstuddedsky @dejavernon @tae-bebe

Message me if you want to be added to the permanent taglist! &lt;3

[come-away-with-me87]

The Art of Love Chapter 5

Chapter 4 here

******

"Please, have a seat," as you motioned to the seat on the other side of your desk.  Shouta and you both sat down in your respective seats, and he looked around your desk for a moment.  It was primarily scattered with the kids' drawings, but over to the side, there was a picture of you and Kento from your engagement photoshoot.  Even though he's been gone for years, you never had the heart to take it down.  You had told yourself it was a reminder of the decision you had made back at his funeral, but now you were having complicated feelings about everything.

"Is that you and your husband?" Shouta asked, finally speaking up first.  "Oh...oh. That's...that was my fi-fiance, Kento. He passed away a few years ago."  Shouta looked over at you, "I see. I'm sorry."  You looked over at the picture for a moment, then looked back over at Shouta, "thank you."  You two sat there in an awkward silence for another moment, until you said to Shouta, "so, you wanted to tell me about Eri's past and why she's here?"  His shoulders seemed to relax a little bit after the awkwardness, simply replying, "yes."  

Shouta then went on to explain everything from the beginning.  For years, she was used and abused as an experiment to make a Quirk-Destroying drug by the leader of the Shie Hassaikai, Overhaul.  "Her body was destroyed then restored over and over again by Overhaul's Quirk," Shouta said with venom in his voice.  He then went on to explain how he Shie Hassaikai joined forces with the League of Villains, which is when the rescue plan was put in order by a pro-hero named Sir Nighteye.  After much grief and loss, Mirio and a boy named Izuku Midoriya were finally able to rescue Eri, with Mirio losing his Quirk in the process.

"Eri lived a very fearful and secluded life," Shouta stated.  "We never saw her smile for the first time until long after she was rescued, when Mirio took her to the U.A. School Festival.  I've been working with her since then on maintaining her Quirk.  Overall, she shows to be better, but I thought this class could also, in a way, provide a form of therapy to her that the U.A. can't."  You sat there and just looked at Shouta with tears in your eyes; what a heartbreaking situation for a young girl to go through.  You blinked back your tears, trying to remain professional, and brought out some of Eri's artwork.

You slid her self-portrait across the desk to Shouta stating, "this is one that has concerned me the most so far."  Shouta picked up the drawing from the desk and observed it.  "Interesting..." you heard him say for the second time now.  "It's difficult to tell, but this looks like the outfit she was in when she was being held captive in. She had on a tan dress and was covered in bandages."  He put the drawing back down and you automatically looked down at it, saying "it seems she still views herself that way for some reason."  "I agree," Shouta replied, "I'll talk with her about it tonight after we're done training."  

"What exactly are you training her on, if you don't mind my asking?"  He looked up at you thoughtfully for a moment, "I'm helping her train on controlling her Quirk since she was never taught how to. She's shown tremendous progress so far, but still has a ways to go."  You smiled at him in response, "you're pretty remarkable, you know that? You spend your days teaching and training students on becoming heroes, then you spend your evenings training Eri. It takes a pretty special person to do something like that."  Shouta slightly blushed and looked down at his lap, quietly saying, "it's not a big deal."  You just smiled again in response.

He looked back up at you, "the colors she chose for her mandala..." he trailed off, "I believe she associates those colors with Overhaul," to which he explained what Overhaul's outfit consisted of.  "Ah, it makes sense why you said it was interesting when you first saw it. I promise, I will do my best to continue working with Eri through her trauma, and help her become the best version of herself," you said with confidence to Shouta.  "It seems like she is also in excellent hands with everyone at the U.A., so between that and her art therapy, I'm confident that she'll heal."  

It was Shouta's turn to smile at you, "thank you for taking her into your class, Y/N. She thinks very highly of you, saying you're very kind to her. I can tell you're a warm person, and I appreciate you now being a part of not only her healing process, but her life."  Now it was your turn to blush.  "Listen, I don't normally do this, but I would like to give you my personal phone number in case you ever need me for anything...for Eri, of course."  You wrote your phone number down on a piece of paper, and slid it across the desk to him.  "Thank you, Y/N, I appreciate that. I'll give my number as well, in case something happens in the classroom or you're concerned about anything...regarding Eri."

He ripped off a small piece of paper from the one you gave him, wrote his number down on it, and slid it back across the desk to you.  "Well, I better get back to the campus. I have training with Eri and I also have papers to grade. Thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to talk to me."  You smiled over at him, "it was my pleasure."  You both got up at the same time, and you walked him over to the door.  "Thank you, Shouta, for everything you've been doing for Eri; I can tell you've been such a positive influence in her life; she's lucky to have someone like you."  He smiled at you once more, said goodbye, then took his leave.  You couldn't help but stand there and stare at him walking away.

You went back to your desk, picked up the piece of paper with Shouta's number on it, and plugged his number into your cell phone.  You then noticed yourself smiling the whole while.  After you finished putting his name and number in your contacts list, you put your phone down, and took a deep breath.  Sure, Shouta had some sort of effect over you that you couldn't explain, but you only have his phone number for Eri's sake.  That was all.  At least, that's what you told yourself, as you continued to smile down at Shouta's name in your contacts list.

******

To be continued...

******

Tag list: @lili-pond ; @jaguarthecat ; @big-denki-energy ; @ivydoesit23

[akosijayjay]

January and February dump

This is my most recent work of Lloyd, and my most recent work in general. I made this in the computer room at school with a painful high-sensitive mouse. We have these special course thing in our junior high, so every tuesday after class, I get to be in the computer room. For six hours... (My course is Visual Graphics Design. I'm kinda regretting it now since I've been thinking of becoming an architect... I can't change my course now since it's too late. Which is stupid.)

I'll try to draw more there! I really like drawing with a mouse cause I like the challenge. And since I'm not accustomed to a high-sensitive mouse, it'll be a bigger challenge for me!

I made these two in traditional then polished them digitally since I straight up just used a pen. I rarely use a pencil nowadays so I can learn to fix mistakes without erasing it. Usually it ends up looking like chicken scratch but I'm getting better.

My Harumi one is so bad lol.. When I was making it, my classmates around me were messing around and moving the chairs in the process, making me have to draw strokes with shaky lines. It's not that noticeable though since I made the lines thicker.

I was planning to make something for Rebooted's anniversary but I got busy... (And lazy) The PIXAL one was inspired by an animatic I saw.

If you compare the previous Arin portrait, yes, they don't look the same. I'm trying to find a look for Arin, as I do with every character, that I'll be satisfied with.

By the way, I'm kind of basing Arin's hair with my classmate's hair. Which is funny because my other classmates compared this artwork to my classmate, who looked nothing like Arin but have similar hair, commenting they're the same. (I'm not mad because I actually find this a bit humorous)

I was trying to make an animatic and this was going to be the sketch. But then again, I got busy and lazy. (Mostly lazy)

I accidentally changed their facial features a bit by accident on the second page because I forgot to reference the first page. It was tiring flipping pages every 5 seconds, ok! Also, I drew it after 2 days when I drew the first page, and I didn't have a design I liked for them yet. (...I just noticed Jay has different eye colors in both pages...)

I think I'm sticking to these looks for Lloyd. I'll try to make it accurate to this. (I think I did great with the first image of this post. Though, I made him too round for my liking.)

Discard the growing beard post redesign Lloyd has. That beard thing was supposed to be where his chin was until I realized it was too small. And it's still too small.

Child Lloyd is so cute! The eyeshadow wasn't intentional at first, but then it got me thinking, what if Lloyd had an emo phase? And now emo child Lloyd is my headcanon.

Pre redesign Lloyd kind of reminds me of TommyInnit, and I find it quite funny. Maybe it's the facial gesture, I know a lot of TommyInnit fanarts with that silly face.

For Dragons Rising Lloyd however, I want him to have long hair with his post redesign face. I'll try to make full body designs of the 4 Lloyds.

You guys probably don't care, and this is the first time you've seen me because I don't have an exact artstyle and I dont post as much, but I'm going to put descriptions now since this blog is going to be a silly little art dump! And blog posts are supposed to be descriptive. Which I should've done in the beginning and explained my works..

Anyhow

If you liked my art, thank you!

If you saw me before and told me I did well, thank you and I'm sorry!! I know my previous posts have gotten comments and I'm sorry I didn't respond.. I'm not trying to be ungrateful, I just don't know how to express my appreciation for your positive feedback! Or just reply in general... I get nervous even when I'm wearing my mask..

Please don't hate me, I'm just really anxious to show my work to people I don't know to the point where I might think people disliked my artwork when it's the opposite..

(I'll probably copy paste this in future posts now lol. But I AM thankful that some of you guys think my works are great!)