#i want to write this so badly now
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listen listen listen what if. what if magical creature au? what if fae viktor au? what if fantasy romance au????
what if viktor (and jayce, they're a package deal) are. like. you know. Other. creatures. magical fae from some hidden parallel reality in a forest. just...there's a whole world of Them out there, living their lives and Maybe occasionally stealing kids from nearby villages (as you do).
so the humans, like, know they're there, and try to avoid them, right? that's what you do when you learn that there are these, these BEINGS with MAGICAL POWERS and WEIRD CUSTOMS and POINTY EARS just....hanging out on the other side of the forest. that's what you do when every nursery rhyme you've ever heard is about how dangerous they are. you stay away.
you don't see them, and they don't see you. big deal if sometimes there's rocks in weird piles and mushroom that grow in circles and sometimes all the fish in a pond are suddenly exactly the same color. so what if sometimes when there's a full moon all the frogs go quiet.
so what if sometimes there's singing in the darkness! you pretend not to hear it, and you wear the special forged jewellery that everyone says you should, even when you're not a child anymore. you go through the motions of all the superstitions, help with gardening and keeping the small streams that circle the village in good shape. they're not supposed to be able to cross over running water, and you have no idea if that's true, since it's just as nonsensical as everything else that's said about them - but you do it anyway.
you live your life, and they live theirs, quietly.
the two worlds don't really overlap.
but, you know, they've been there for so many years, on these small lands, and fae politics don't always mix that well with creatures from other places, so it's boring, and....what if things in the forest are just....stagnant and old and unfair?
what if viktor doesn't like the way things are?
what if he's - well, what if the system isn't very fair, and he just isn't lucky?
so what if he wants to change things. make it better. help others who maybe also weren't born lucky.
what if he wants progress.
what if, to achieve this, he sneaks out of the forest sometimes to steal some....things. things he can't get otherwise and he's sure the people won't miss that much - just scrap metal, mostly. maybe sometimes a pastry.
he knows it's dangerous - not only because he's not supposed to be seen, and yes, he knows that stealing is bad, but that's not the point - but also because that scrap metal is, categorically, technically poisonous to him. but it's fine! he knows how to handle it, he's careful. and he's going to show them that they can use it to make things better.
#thoughts#scribbles#i want to write this so badly now#hey if anyone knows anything about like fae legends or something hmu because i don't
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unconditionally
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#im shaky and numb the way this took years off my life#genuinely cannot believe i thought it was smart to make it a comic i could have stuck at a painting and it would have been fine#but nooooooo in my hubris i thought Surely im an expert at this longform stuff now Surely i can do it :)#and then it killed me it killed me dead this is like over twice as long as the train comic and 4 times as detailed#backgrounds . angles. i yearn fr death.#AND I HAD 2 WRITE THEM ACTUALLY TALKING GGSDH i am actually so insecure abt the way the dialogue flows gomen....#i wanted to add more to it to fix how clipped and rushed i think it reads#but that would mean drawing more expressions would mean drawing more panels would mean more gd hyDRANGEAS#so ultimately i decided 2 have the conversation take the hit because let me tell u.#if i have to draw. one more blue petal i will snap i will lose it#i knew tht would happen n wanted to alleviate some of the pain so i found a few brushes that helped speed up the process#but the thing w a lot of premade flower brushes is they also come preshaded n look uniform in a way that stands out badly against my style#so i had 2 render over them anyway........#yuuji's domain rly putting me through the wringer first the train station now death by a bajillion petals smh#all that to say tho . my labour of love . i am going to take a nap#hina.comic
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tshirt that says NO LIVE ORGANISM CAN CONTINUE FOR LONG TO EXIST SANELY UNDER CONDITIONS OF ABSOLUTE REALITY
#i literally JUST finished hill house a few days ago and i already want to reread. Badly. it's sooo so so soo sooooooooo good <33333!!!!!#also completely enamored by shirley jackson's writing style i NEED to read everything she has written ever like right now..#opening lines of ALL TIME btw 👆❗❗❗#r.txt#the haunting of hill house#ALSO i've seen commentary videos on the tv show they made of hill house but from what i remember of it it's SO different from the book???#i think they were all siblings in the show which is??????? like why would you change that part?? i love sibling relationships as much as the#next guy but i feel like the fact that none of them knew each other was such an essential part of the story like why would u change it....#also eleanor was like. an entirely different character who was also already dead in the show i believe??? and dr. montague doesn't exist??#hill house could've been really good as a show idk why they changed it up like that...like was the original story not interesting enough for#you or something?? WHO decided to make that change i just wanna talk ��
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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botw2 (totk rewritten) ganondorf design (+some story) post
Mummy version what link and zelda discover beneath hyrule castle when investigating the failing shiekah tech and discover a cave system that leads to several abandoned shiekah research/security sites and ultimately lead to a cave in which ganondorf is still sealed away by the ancient queen of hyrule; after the initial sealing (or capture rather) her descendant and the shiekah, who were rapidly advancing their tech at the time, build around it, both to keep the seal secret and safe (as the actual sealing was a short but intense battle between him and the queen that wasnt intended to happen like that, in the middle of the throne room that got broken and both ended up in the underground, the only survivor being the young princess of hyrule from that time- since all involved parties except for her died little was known as to how and why but the stories were spun regardless and ultimately the final narrative was in hyrules favor) and to use ganondorfs immense spiritual power and magical skill- eventually becoming one of the main power sources for all shiekah technology (ouch)
the chamber is all shiekah built (post sealing) and similarly secured like the monks in shrines (though visibly decaying and failing)- once disturbed the remainder of the ancient queen fused into zeldas hand (with seemingly no effect but temporary pain, perhaps she will hear voices from the past telling her not to explore any further .. still working on that) ganondorfs body falls to the ground but then springs back to life, somewhat clumsily but fiercly attacking zelda and link, the shock from being in this horrendous condition between life and death for thousands and thousands of years and suddendly being thrust back into his decayed and used up body still fresh
the mastersword is broken and links arm destroyed, both link and zelda start to flee from the crumbling cave, zelda dragging link behind her in panic (and as he is hurt)- after which link gets his shiekah tech arm (and the arm stays gone) and the world changes
mid game fight- this game is not as free in progression as botw, you can do alot when you want but some things will remain locked, the mid game fight can only happen once the 4 main regions problems have been dealt with (very different to canon totk, but that is for a different post) and the castle, which fell into the underground shortly after the intro, is made accessible (specific way how still in work) the interior is both broken castle, rooms previously blocked, and shiekah tech- since beneath the castle was a whole, giant array of tech made to secure the castle, including reserves of ancient energy specifically for the royal family and the entire mechanism behind the rising pillars filled with guardians-
at the start of the dungeon link is grabbed by malice/miasma hands and dragged into the castle, seperated from zelda and the mechanics she introduced (crafting/reparing weapons and more), theres no way out, teleports are blocked; after getting further in alone, zelda finds you again, and nothing seems out of the ordinary (unless you have a keen eye, she only uses her left arm and would walk past things she usually wouldnt) after a certain amount of progression, without warning, as soon as zelda is out of the cameras view she will attack you relentlessly, not speaking a word and with changed eye color- after fighting with her/beign chased into the main throne room, the real zelda breaks through a wall, her friends in tow (yunobo, teba+tulin, riju, sidon, which she went to to ask for help, explaining the time gap), and ganondorf drops the disguise, a fight with him (mummy version) ensues, though he is very much back to his senses
at the end of the fight he shows (or forces her to see) zelda his last memory from when he lived, the confrontation with the ancient queen to his sealing (since she doesnt know/is in denial of her families role in both all this and the sonaus (zonais) extinction (as well as the betrayal and persecution of the shiekah later on), and his beef is with her specifically, link is just her guard dog after all) (i wasnt sure to include a direct scene from the past, but this one scene is very self contained and gives alot of context while still letting most of the past be a mystery- as i want to keep it as feeling ... removed and unknown as much as possible from the world you know)
(after which he leaves the scene as zelda tries to understand what she just saw)
post revival Ganondorf (beginning of end fight cutscene and phase 1.) only appears at the end (excluding the possible cutscene in the mid game fight, which shows him in his time, alive, which is a different design than this that i will make for a cutscene/story post)
the end of the game is in/on the forgotten plateau (it ends were botw began :) ) perhaps it rose higher and revealed an entrance after more game progression (at least one more dungeon, master kogas, and the restorations of the master sword via deku tree dungeon and sword quest involving the dragons; how much of the past you cared to explore within caves, which ARE the underground- its in several bigger and smaller, harder to access caves, each being somewhat to very unique and reveal more context, is largely irrelevant, it mostly serves to give YOU more context and make you think)
the dungeon is within the plateau, once to the end there is a longer cutscene of zelda trying to talk with ganondorf, now in his, largely, restored form (largely as in, not exactly as he was in past, clothing difference etc), her having come to understand what her legacy is and wanting to take responsibility for it; he listens calmly and talks to her for a bit (but the tension is very high, he knows what threat he poses and his goals, zelda is visibly trying to keep it together) and for a bit it might look like she can avoid this conflict
but he makes it very clear then, that she cannot undo anything, there is no possible price she could pay, he has suffered at hyrules hands for generations, having seen the world that was his home grow into myth, see his own people forget him, and how the history was remembered, not as it was, but as they wanted it to; he is forever changed, ripped from his time and all he ever held dear (there are clues and a mention of him having had two daughters, a little boar figurine, carved from wood of trees now extinct, hangs from his belt even now)- he wasnt a perfect king, but well liked and kept his country to stay strong against hyrules schemes .. until he fell- he is not truly alive, he is in a strangers world and this world hates him, it is anger and hatred, rage against all that happend, guilt for having failed his own, feeling betrayed by them yet, even if not truly their fault as no one knew what really happened except him, but he was imprisoned, with no breath to speak nor air to scream
he does not care for this world and his only goals now are to disrupt as much as possible, be the unstoppable force that hyrules always been, be the monster they wanted him to be, do as he wants until someone stops him ...and kill zelda to end her rotten family- but even if she gave up her life willingly he wouldnt take it, she will have to fight and make her own hands dirty and she does not want to die.
your friends arrive, and the battle begins.
(rough examples of his weapons are further below; he fights with one arm only in phase 1. then reforms his missing arm with malice, borrowed from the boar appearance, though it is not usable enough to truly replace it, it acts more like beasts claw and to copy some of links abilities, like the hookshot)
Beast Ganon(dorf), normal appearance (phase 3)
at the end of phase 2 he knocks out your friends, changes into beast form and attacks you, zelda using her magic to shield both her and link so he cannot bite through, instead smashes them both through stone and dirt all the way to the surface of the plateau on which the fight continues, this time only link and zelda
(his movement isnt a senseless rage, but a graceful being, he moves and jumps, floats and swims through the air as the ground in an almost dragon like way, he still wields magic, not all malice, but lightning and perhaps even more too, it is still him, just a different form)
Beast Ganon(dorf) while charging magic (phase 3)
Ganondorf phase 2 + Ganondorf phase 4 (slightly out of order but the boar wouldnt fit on one picture with other forms)
at the end of phase 3 (beast) it seems like you have beaten him, he is down and zelda takes charge, ready to do as she did to the dark beast she faced before (dark beast ganon in botw) but as she raises her hand a sword slash cuts off half her right hand- he is not done yet and refuses to be dealt with like that again, not by her hand again-
the final phase is a mix of all, including his appearance, this is the final struggle, to give every last drop of strength, the hole in his chest is open, malice eyes staring from within, it keeps him alive yet still-
zelda is disabled for this fight, she has been taken to safety by your friends, this fight is all on link to finish; while this is his most desperate and vengeful form, he is not senseless either, he summons his sword to attack you with as he did in phase 2, then throws it at you, quickly conducting lighting to it and while you are busy dodging lunges like in beast form (to paint the picture a little), this fight is supposed to be truly challenging.
(heres a rough example for his weapons)
(not fully sure of the ending scene, but there is supposed to be a short view into a timeskip in which zelda also has half a prosthetic hand made from shiekah tech)
#ganondoodles#art#zelda#tloz#ganondoodles rewrites totk#botw2#ganondorf#legend of zelda#... it was supposed to be more focused on the design and less about story#but .... i do be writing#most design notes are on the pictures i hope its readable#and the lore dump isnt too much ...........................#i am actually really really nervous about this#bc i want to do ganondorf justice but also feel like im using so many tropes that in turn its just as bad as canon totk#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah#also it took me over an hour to write all this#i always get carried away and start describing things like its darn book nhjkdfnkjdnkfjd#anyway im gonna hide in bed now#long post#accidentally so but i dont have the heart to delete all that text#nor to spend another hour describing stuff again ..#do tell how you liked it if you made it all the way through ......... im bracing myself for criticism#like i like all i came up with but dont know if it comes across as i want or writtten badly or maybe its not good#just what I would like more ...........................
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i think we can put all the versions of death note and its adaptations into a spectrum based on how much light and L want to kill each other and on one side of the spectrum, it's the death note japanese musical and on the very other side, it's the death note tv drama.
#🍂 arian's shit#death note#lawlight#light yagami#l lawliet#death note musical#death note jdrama#i have been thinking about this and. yeah.#in the japanese musical version of playing his game (into him) it literally says#“i'll choke it out of you with these hands your life”#which is so fucking hardcore#like they both want to kill each other so badly#WITH BARE HANDS.#THEY COULD IF THEY TRIED TO#but in the jdrama it's like. so tame.#they are not into it at all they are probably repulsed by the very idea of it#EVEN IN THE WHOLE BLUE SCENE#light was like “i wanted to be your friend forever 🥺”#and L was like “you were my only friend 🥺”#when light was writing L's name even he was sobbing and everything#i heard someone in tumblr also say that the L vs kira confrontation in the blue warehouse was like a#worried friend confronting their friend about their substance abuse#AND LIKE. YEAH. EXACTLY#actually the musical and tv drama are very opposite adaptations now that i think about it???#on the mikami screentime spectrum there is no mikami at all side#vs heaps and heaps and heaps of mikami screentime where he is responsible for like 40% of the events occuring
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having a very rough night so raph doodles needed to be made
when in need, mash two interests together
#i love him so muhc ghghgh#and uh please stop sending me asks straight up demanding me to draw more /nm#if u've sent me an ask just regarding art before pls dont feel anxious this is about people actually DEMANDING like im some sort of machine#im absent due to my work/mental health situation going up and down#tmnt will ofc always be special interest but right now its in the back row#theres little time for anything but work and meetings and thinking about work and.. well.. monster hunter escapism egsfkhjhh..#but yeah i promise im still here#and i want to draw him when i can#but stress is high right now and drawing takes too much wrist stamina to do often now#i hope u understand#sorry if i worded myself badly im very tired and stresed n its ... oh its 5am great. wellp. goodnight skafklgsjdklfnshh#my art#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt#nordidia art#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt raph#id in alt text#also one would think my art style is easy on my wrist but#i gorilla grip my pen and when i learned to write as a child i held the pencil jank#and it stuck like that#so its really rough on my hands#sadly
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I just finished my reread of JLA: Tower of Babel and frankly, I'm surprised by the lack of Superbat fics about this plotline. I mean, it's the perfect setting for all the Superbat angst you could dream of.
How everyone keeps pointing out that Supes is the one closest to Batman, Clark emphatically referring to what happened as "your betrayal", how Bruce's files are cold and professional about everyone EXCEPT Clark (his fear of seeing him in pain), his guilt, how everyone else is loud and angry but Clark is silent and hurt, the fact Clark gave him the kryptonite in the first place. Clark having the final say and voting Bruce out of the League. Bruce KNOWING that he would do that and leaving because he didn't want to hear it.
The confrontation on Divided We Fall with all the accusations and the obvious hurt on both sides... then the agreement to reveal their identities together.
Tell me this wouldn't be an excellent break up/getting back together fic? The hurt/comfort of all times. If someone doesn't write this soon, I might have to.
#i honestly can't find any superbat fics about tower of babel but if you know of any I'm begging you to let me know!!! I need them#listen it's not my fault that mark waid chose to make a lot of emphasis on Bruce's relationship with Clark#even tho Diana is the only one who also knows Bruce's identify most of the focus is on Clark's reactions#my WIPs are judging me right now but I want to write this so badly too#superbat#superman x batman#bruce wayne x clark kent
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thinking about best friend!shoto who, due to his not-so-normal upbringing, is pretty open minded, which makes him a good listener when you need one. you both being in the same room doing your own thing but having each other there as support. you being the talkative one and him being happy to just listen, whether it’s about your dating life, academics, or your latest obsession. training together and taking what you guys have learned for your own quirks to try and apply it to help each other. him coming to you about anything regarding romance or personal relationships because he admires you in that respect. you guys ultimately being the people you run back to in times of need, because no matter what, when it’s all said and done, your friendship is stronger than anything else the world has to offer.
katsu2ji © 2024. please don't copy, modify, or do anything of the sort with my work! i work very hard and you simply do not have my permission.
#⋆.˚ s writes!#— mha!#hmm perhaps this is cheesy but idc I LOVE SHOTO!#i genuinely want to be his best friend#so badly :((#wrote this last night and currently on the way to work and editing :D#might make the a headcannon list if i come up with more#but for now take this 🫡#mha#mha x reader#bnha#bnha x reader#my hero academia#shouto todoroki#shoto todoroki#todoroki x reader#shoto x reader#mha headcanons#todoroki headcanons
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Happy Anniversary In Stars and Time!! Have some Friend Quest based drawings :D
(These have specific quote picks related to them! And there's also a long ramble on why I like those specific quotes below if interested)
(And by long, I mean roughly 2k+ words of proper ramble total, so be warned before clicking keep reading this link right here to the rb!!)
#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#<- edited now this is just act 3 spoilers for the art LMAO#isat mirabelle#isat isabeau#isat odile#isat bonnie#isat siffrin#<- i promise this is the last time in a long long time i tag someone who only shows up with their back turned#but in my defense they also are here four times so i think the tag is justified SADASFA#time for a messier secondary post underneath the first WAHOOOO#to start!! random art tidbits!! no one is looking at siffrin in these!!#mira and isa are looking away while odile and bonnie have their eyes closed#in my minds eye these are the A4 versions of the FQ so siffrin internally is Not Having A Good Time#i just thought itd be fun to incorporate somehow as an extra easter egg detail kinda!#also i tried to make the bgs mildly accurate to location in game and its the reason why isa got to have one (1) singular tree in the bg#laaast art tidbit is that i took a bit of a creative liberty with bonnies#well i did with all of them but still#since its not explicitly stated sif god up immediately after tripping they get to stay on the floor in the drawing#i just thought itd be fun for the drawing!!#moving onto general tidbits in addition to the time fun fact i also decided the posting time#specifically so itd be in the middle of me having back to back to back meetings so can't second guess myself in posting this HAHA#every time i post any form of text based ramble on characters or even headcanons i Fear#and YEAH i am probably just being overly nitpicky towards myself on analysis that can prob be read several diff ways cuz interpretation#but i really really really dont want to fumble so badly to the point of mischaracterizing anyone since i like them a lot!!#still working on getting over that but hey at least i am trying and thats all i can ask of myself i think!#okay now time to Lie Down im writing these tags after stream#tag talk over into q u go :]#partial pin
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fellow writers and artists, severe depression destroyed me for almost 4 straight years and i'm determined to get back into it but my concentration isn't what it used to be.
What do you do to start projects (and not just freeze up like I do) and also what kind of music or ambient sounds do you listen to?
#actual request for help because i can't focus anymore and it sucks!!#do not be shy in the replies either i prommy i will value every bit of help#i want to be creative so badly but 90% of the time i'm frozen at the start#this is @ anyone who writes or draws!! >:0 idc if you post it or not bc i also do it just for me#it's just very very very difficult now#prawn posts
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I'm too hungry and my sleepless hours count has gotten longer, I should be resting for my day tomorrow. BUT TIM JUST WON'T GET OUT OF MY HEAD. Oh, yeah, and read the tags THE TAGS HAVE MORE INFORMATION!!!!
Robin Hood AU
Part 1 (because somehow people like this?)
Part 2 (why I'm i writing this anyway?)
///
Tim wasn't... he didn't want this.
He wanted to stop Ra's at any cost, yes, but... Gotham paid for it. It wasn't his finest hour, god, it wasn't even close to his worst hour, this was an aberration in his history, it wasn't part of the plan (if he had one) it wasn't his intention and it never had been. But he can't find the strength in himself to stop and regret that he killed innocent people.
At least Ra's would never return to Gotham for his head, all he would find would be too many poisons with no cure
It wasn't his brightest idea to start a chemical war against the League of Assassins. Nor will it be his best plan to face the Devil face to face (whom he only defeated with the power of Anime and God -and lots and lots of Joker gas-) and win when Ra's ran away with his tail between his legs because not only was he defeated by a 15-year-old boy, but that same boy digitally destroyed the League of Assassins and emptied all their accounts to send the money to a slum in Crime Alley? Damn Robin Hood.
But innocent blood was shed
Tim had devised a perfect combination of chemical weapons that would destroy the strongest mind and had made his own mask against it, any hole in your body would be a route for the gas to sneak in and destroy you from within. Tim had made his own homemade, airtight version of a semi-functional suit and if his mask had any design it was mere coincidence (Tim didn't want people to know about it, he just wanted revenge)
And Batman? Batman couldn't do anything before he was right in front of his nose. Tim had made sure to move so silently that Batman only noticed that a chemical war was going on in his city when the gas in the air was so thick it looked like smoke
But Tim wasn't a monster, he sent the antidote to all the hospitals and warned them in advance so they would be prepared... if the hospitals didn't listen to him then it was their fault, not Tim's
Batman only arrived to hear Ra's swearing about a "New Young Detective" and "Damn stupid kid" as he fled. And if he found himself stuck between following Ra's, stopping Robin Hood, or helping the civilians then that's his problem. Nightwing stayed in Gotham to help the victims and clean up the water supply because damn it, Gotham, why did it have to rain today, Red Hood took care of distributing the antidote on the streets, Orphan stayed with Batman to look for Robin Hood, Spoiler kept up his normal patrol (Because DAMN IT, GOTHAM WON'T STOP BEING GOTHAM EVEN IF THERE WAS FUCKING CHEMICAL WARFARE IN THE CITY PARK) with his eyes open for any Robin Hood sightings, Robin reluctantly went to check out the hospitals and pretended not to enjoy being able to help the nurses, and Oracle tried to keep track of all the transactions and mass destruction done to the League of Assassins
And Tim? Tim, for the first time in... his entire life, sat in his room... and cried like a tired 4-year-old. Tired of fighting, tired of taking care of himself, tired of having his whole life revolve around other adults, tired... just plain exhausted. He cried for his dead father, his dead mother, the childhood he never had, what he sacrificed, the people he killed, his future. And he held a funeral in his small apartment, where Timothy Drake, for the first time, had someone cry for him.
Part 4 for some reason???
Part 5 O_o?
#too short#but i want to sleep so badly#Tim sad#tim drake centric#i wanna protect him#dc robin#dc comics#robin hood#robin#nightwing#oracle#batman#red hood#spoiler#orphan#batfam#ras al ghul#after this we will go with#tim joining the batfam#haha thats not gonna happen here#i am allergic to happiness#like literally#tim drake#villain tim drake#now we are getting to the part i wanted to write so bad#is gonna hurt#and im gonna enjoy it#while i cry#cause man#it is gonna hurt
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Fanfiction is so goated actually
No monetary incentive, just writing in one's free time. Some incentive for like kudos and comments, because who doesn't want to hear that someone else enjoyed what they wrote. Just writing a story that is good and/or enjoyable, no real-life pressure to keep it going because god forbid you and other people are depending on it financially.
Writing a story because you want to write a good story, so you can write what they want the way you want, at a pace that is realistic for you, with exactly the plot pacing you want there to be.
#c*rny posts#thinking about this after the my h*ro academia leaks lmao#i have read barely a few chapters of the manga and then kept up with it through tumblr osmosis#i was interested in how its gonna end#and after reading the leaks i was like 'well its up to the fanfic writers to write a good ending now'#cause. it was kind of underwhelming. like some stuff made sense and some things were just done badly#which is realistic considering h*rikoshi is apparently burned out to hell#and i was thinking. man. if i had to write AND illustrate a story for like ten years straight. because its my bread and butter#and there are other people depending on the story doing well to make money#it would 100% get to me. i would rather end it all lmao#which is why i think fanfic is so great#just writing a story that you want. that makes sense to you. that has elements you want. that is exactly as long as you want.#and there isnt even a possibility of really monetizing it so there is no drive to make is 'succeed' or make it as long as possible#this could be applied to just writing a 'regular' story also that is not intended for publishing#also kinda makes me think about h*ikyuu#i kinda do feel the timeskip and the ending were a bit rushed#but like. if it was me. i would have rushed it too lmao#after so many years of working on one thing and one thing only i would have been so done. just so done#and h*ikyuu ending to me wasnt even bad. it was good with good resolution of everything. with characters evolving and achieving their dreams#not necessarily volleyball related (like tenma)#the progress made realistic sense#but it did feel a bit rushed#anyway#fanfic and writing for yourself is great#and manga authors face way too much pressure from people dependent on them. from fans. even from society in general
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Wild how we know that Elizabeth Woodville was officially appointed to royal councils in her own right during her husband’s reign and fortified the Tower of London in preparation of a siege while 8-months pregnant and had forces gathering at Westminster “in the queen’s name” in 1483 – only for NONE of these things to be even included, let alone explored, in the vast majority of scholarship and historical novels involving her.
#lol I don't remember writing this - I found it when I was searching for something else in my drafts. But it's 100% true so I had to post it.#elizabeth woodville#my post#Imo this is mainly because Elizabeth's negative historiography has always involved both vilification and diminishment in equal measure.#and because her brand of vilification (femme fatale; intriguer) suggests more indirect/“feminine” than legitimate/forceful types of power#It's still bizarre though-you'd think these would be some of the most famous & defining aspects of Elizabeth's life. But apparently not#I guess she only matters when it comes to marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard#There is very lacking interest in her beyond those things even in her traditionally negative depictions#And most of her “reassessments” tend to do diminish her so badly she's rendered utterly irrelevant and almost pathetic by the end of it#Even when some of these things *are* mentioned they're never truly emphasized as they should be.#See: her formal appointment in royal councils. It was highly unconventional + entirely unprecedented for queens in the 14th & 15th century#You'd think this would be incredibly important and highlighted when analyzing late medieval queenship in England but apparently not#Historians are more willing to straight-up INVENT positions & roles for so many other late medieval queens/king's mothers that didn't exist#(not getting into this right now it's too long...)#But somehow acknowledging and discussing Elizabeth's ACTUAL formally appointed role is too much for them I guess#She's either subsumed into the general vilification of her family (never mind that they were known as 'the queen's kin' to actual#contemporaries; they were defined by HER not the other way around) or she's rendered utterly insignificant by historians. Often both.#But at the end of the day her individual role and identity often overlooked or downplayed in both scenarios#and ofc I've said this before but - there has literally never been a proper reassessment of Elizabeth's role in 1483-85 TILL DATE#despite the fact that it's such a sensational and well-known time period in medieval England#This isn't even a Wars of the Roses thing. Both Margaret of Anjou and Margaret Beaufort have had multiple different reassessments#of their roles and positions during their respective crises/upheavals by now;#There is simply a distinct lack of interest in reassessing Elizabeth in a similar way and I think this needs to be acknowledged.#Speaking of which - there's also a persistent habit of analyzing her through the context of Margaret of Anjou or Elizabeth of York#(either as a parallel or a foil) rather than as a historical figure in HER OWN RIGHT#that's also too long to get into I just wanted to point it out because I hate it and I think it's utterly senseless#I've so much to say about how all of this affects her portrayal in historical fiction as well but that's going into a whole other tangent#ofc there are other things but these in particular *really* frustrate me#just felt like ranting a bit in the tags because these are all things that I want to individually discuss someday with proper posts...
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i need to clean up more of my tsv meta drafts and post them i used to love posting tsv meta
#🐉#got too depressed and artbrained for a while there but now im burning out on art a bit so perhaps writing would help balance things#i have a really good one (in my opinion) about sainthood and trying to find meaning in suffering#with sid wright and VAL parallels that i badly want to articulate in a way thats actually coherent and comprehensible to other people#so far all i have though is 'being able to recognise what pain is and express it does not meaningfully change the fact that you are in pain#i guess its appropriate that im struggling to find the words though. lol.
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It's weird to expect lb to be able to read cn mind and called her a bad partner for it. But it's even weirder for lb to ignore cn WHEN HES OBVIOUSLY IN DISTRESS and not called her a bad partner for it because I think called her a bad partner for ignoring it is understandable and justified especially since she consider herself as his boss.
Every time I bring up this conflict, I try to make it clear that I don't think Ladybug was blameless, I just think Chat Noir's writing was worse. Let's walk through the problem to show what I mean.
Season four stars with Marinette extremely stressed by her new Guardian status. In Truth and Lies, the first episodes of the season, we get this:
Ladybug: Will you cut it out with the practical jokes? I could have really hurt you! Cat Noir:(answering while hanging by the yo-yo) M'lady, the only thing that really hurts me is when you make me go on patrol by myself. (sighs, relaxing his posture) I even missed your little angry pout. Ladybug: Sorry, Kitty Cat, I'm a bit over my head at the moment. (pulling him up) Cat Noir: I bet! "Guardian of the Miraculous", big name, big responsibility!
This is also the start to Chat Noir communicating poorly. In this episode, he's straight up told that Ladybug is in over her head and he never once asks how he can help. In fact, we even get him saying this when asked how he feels about the change:
Truth: Cat Noir, tell me what- (interupted by Ladybug throwing a present at Truth) Ladybug: (covering her parasol with foil) ...do you think about my new role as guardian! Cat Noir: If it doesn't change things between us, then I'm good with it!
So not a great start to the season. I know people focused on Adrien's terrible treatment of Kagami in these episodes, but this Ladynoir dynamic was actually what rang alarm bells for me. I kept waiting for Chat Noir to offer his support since it was really, really obvious that Ladybug was in over her head since she was late to patrols, the last season literally ended with her losing her mentor figure, and, you know, she straight up told him that was what was going on?
The next episode is Gang of Secrets in which we see Marinette out her identity to Alya. I get why she did this, she needed support and her partner doesn't seem interested in giving it, but she can't say that for certain because she never asked him directly and she should have. Trusting Chat Noir over Alya would have allowed Ladynette to maintain the security of her secret identity - a thing she claimed was more important than ever - and to honor their partnership. At the very least, she should have told Chat Noir that Rena Rouge was now a full time holder so that he could account for that in battle and to minimize the fallout by owning up to her mistake asap. The longer a lie goes on, the worse the truth will hurt.
To Ladybug's credit, she does eventually acknowledge her mistake after the Scarabella incident:
Ladybug: You... must've been pretty surprised to discover there was another holder! (Silence. She sits beside Cat Noir.) Ladybug: I'm really sorry, Cat Noir. I should've told you. I mean, if I found out that you told someone about your secret identity, I'd... probably be upset, too. I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings.
This is a decent apology. She doesn't try to absolve herself of wrong doing. Instead, she acknowledges that what she did would hurt her, too, if the shoe were on the other foot. The only thing she loses points on is the fact that she doesn't tell him about Rena Furtive.
However, instead of agreeing with her and telling her that she has hurt him, Chat Noir says that she did nothing wrong and never once brings up how their weakened partnership is bothering him:
Cat Noir: You didn't hurt my feelings. You did everything right. Paris will always need a Ladybug superhero to watch over her. It's just... I realized that if one day that hero wasn't you, m'lady, since we don't know each other's identities, that means... I'd never see you again. Ever. And now, I just don't know if I can bear it.
This is the thing that I hate about this arc. The reason why I say Ladybug is blamed for not reading his mind. Especially because, three episodes later, we get Rocketear, which gives us this:
Cat Noir: Everyone has doubts now and then, (looks down) even me... Ladybug: Is everything okay, Cat Noir? Cat Noir: Yeah, yeah. (prepare his fist) Pound it! Ladybug: (fistbumps) Pound it!
Rocketear is the episode where Nino outs that he and Alya know each other's identities while acting like Ladybug said identities weren't a big deal even though that is very much not what happened. You'd think that Chat Noir would want to know the full story, but instead he just lies and says that everything is fine.
So we have two situations where the show allowed Ladybug to give Chat Noir a chance for clear and open communication and both times he turns her down.
What's worse is that he clearly starts making up stories in his head, leading to Kuro Neko, which starts with Adrien avoiding a fight on purpose as some sort of shit test. He then gets upset when Ladybug... doesn't lament his absence on national TV?
Clara: (from TV) By the way, where's Cat Noir? You've saved Paris without him quite a few times recently. Are you two at odds with each other? Carapace, Pegasus, Vesperia and Pigella: (from TV) Pound it! Ladybug: (from TV) Of course not, it's just that... umm, he's a partner like any other! The most important is to pick the best superheroes for each mission, with or without Cat Noir. No matter what, we've got a great team and we'll always be here to save Paris. (Adrien is shocked.) Adrien: (turns off the TV and sighs) "A partner like any other..."
Dude, what did you want her to do here? Complain that you flaked on her? Make Paris feel less safe by saying she doesn't know where you are? Imply that the fight was barely won without you? What are you doing? Plagg, you are completely failing as a mentor right now.
The shit test continues as Chat Noir goes to meet up with Ladybug now that the battle is over, arriving just as Ladybug has finished instructing the team on what to do:
Ladybug: Come on, guys! Hurry up before you all detransform. I'll meet you at rendezvous points. (The heroes jump away in different directions, and Ladybug starts typing something on her Yo-yo.) Cat Noir: Hey! Meow are you, m'lady? Ladybug: Great, thanks, but I gotta go retrieve all these Miraculous. Cat Noir: I could lend you a paw to help save time. Ladybug: Thanks, kitty cat, but it's a guardian's job to do it. Cat Noir: I know who some of them are, remember? I was there when you first gave them their Miraculous! Ladybug: You don't even know where their rendezvous points are, I don't have time to— Cat Noir: Playing cat and mouse is my forte, you know— Ladybug: (yelling) If you wanna save me time, stop wasting it in the first place! (Cat Noir gasps. As Ladybug swings away, Cat Noir clenches his fist.) Cat Noir: And take my Miraculous back when you're done!
So Ladybug doesn't publicly chastise Chat Noir for missing the battle and rejects an offer to help because of very legitimate timing concerns, leading to Chat Noir quitting because she failed his stupid, petty, childish tests. Realistic writing? Yes. Writing that paints Ladybug as the one in the wrong? No.
Going into this episode, Ladybug has no idea that things are messed up between them even though she has actually kept communication lines open. She asks him if things are okay, but he lies. And when he's ready to quit? He plays stupid games and wins a stupid prize. It's really not shocking that the next scene sees Ladybug totally baffled by what just happened:
Plagg: For a while now, you've been neglecting this camembert— I mean Cat Noir, and going on adventures with the all other cheeses! Ladybug: But he should be happy about it, it gives him more time off. Plagg: Cat Noir doesn't wanna have time off, Ladybug! He is in love with you! And your persistent calling on all the other heroes has broken his heart.
And how is she supposed to know that, Plagg? Was she supposed to assume that her partner was lying when he said he was fine? Because she did ask and he said that nothing was wrong. But something was wrong and it lead him to build up a story in his head, reading nonexistent intent into her actions, all of which is toxic and unhealthy communication.
I cannot stress how common this shit is. I've seen it so many times and I will own that I've done it in the past and wound up getting no support when I needed it because I'd directly told people I didn't and they committed the heinous crime of... believing me.
Here's the other thing, there are times when I'm in distress and legitimately don't want or need help. Times when I just need to be alone for a bit. So if someone asks me if I'm okay during those times, I'm probably just going to say, "Yeah, I just need a people break" or something like that. That's why the Scarabella scene is so bad. Ladybug can see that Chat Noir is in distress and he gives her a fully plausible answer: I'm not upset with you, I'm just saddened by the idea of losing you. And she believes him because why wouldn't she?
Same goes for Rocketear. It's reasonable for Ladybug to assume that Chat Noir is just shaken by the fight. She has no idea about the bombshell that Nino dropped right before the fight. She doesn't even know that Nino and Chat Noir are actually close friends, making this fight a lot more devastating than it looks at face value. Her actions here are not objectively wrong. They're only wrong if you know the whole story, including Adrien's needs. Things that she cannot know unless Chat Noir uses his words to tell her things.
I cannot over stress how much season four is a textbook example of denying yourself support because you cannot communicate your own needs. Is it an understandable character flaw for a character with Adrien's background to have? Yes. Absolutely. 100%. But it's still a character flaw. This season desperately needed an arc about Adrien learning to tell people what's wrong. Not because he's the only one in the wrong here, but because things cannot get better when Ladybug has no idea that she's hurting him. (Nino has no idea either, but let's keep our focus on Ladybug.)
One of the most important things you can do for your own mental well being is to dismiss the idea that your needs are the same as everyone else's. Everyone needs different amounts of attention and values different behavior based on things like their upbringing and life events.
I get the feeling that I'm wired pretty similar to Marinette. At least, it influences how I write her because I can go months without talking to my best friends and still call them my best friends, a trait we all share because two of use are artsy introverts and two of us are moms to young kids, which allows for very little free time. Meanwhile, my SO and his best friend spend hours on the phone almost every week. I swear that those two go into withdrawal if they don't talk at least once every seven days. If months went by without them talking? Something would be very wrong, but the exact same time gap isn't even remotely concerning when it comes to my friends. It's something my SO and I had to figure out when we got together because I need a lot less attention than he does. But we communicated and found a balance that we continue to work to communicate about so that he doesn't feel neglected and I don't feel overwhelmed by too little me time.
What I'm trying to say is Marinette wasn't horribly wrong for assuming that Chat Noir was telling her the truth or that he liked having a larger team so he had less responsibility. Those are reasonable assumptions. Especially since he never actually indicated that he wanted more responsibility until he was ready to quit and decided to shit test her by pushing for more to do when she was stressed and on a timer.
I do think that she should have offered it to him before that or - at the very least - the show should have clearly stated why she didn't do that since it apparently had nothing to do with Chat Blanc trauma like we all thought it did. I'm not saying that she's blameless or perfect or that there weren't things she could have done better. It's just really hard for me to look at Chat Noir's behavior in season four and go, "Oh yeah, he's the injured party here. Ladybug holds all the blame and did everything wrong." She did many things wrong, but generally speaking, she owned her faults and tried to keep communication channels open. Chat Noir chose to ignore those chances to talk or otherwise try to express his needs in a clear and understandable manner.
We'll end with one final point to drive this home: You said that she's his boss. Well, if my boss asked me, "is everything okay with the project?" and I said, "yes" while freaking out about the upcoming deadline that I'm probably going to miss because he's given me too much work, the issue is not all on my boss. It's on both of us. Him for overloading me and me for not telling him I'm overloaded. You could even argue that it's mostly on me because I'm the only one who can properly gauge my own ability to do a given workload. As soon as it was too much, I should have said something. And if I don't feel like my boss is approachable? Then I should quit. But that isn't the situation I'm in and it doesn't appear to be the one that Chat Noir was in, either. He wanted to stay part of the team, he just totally failed to tell Ladybug how being on the team was making him feel.
People magically knowing what you need and how you feel is a myth. I promise you, most people in this world do not want to cause you pain, but if you cannot clearly express when someone is causing you pain, then you will continue to get hurt by people who would be very happy to not hurt you if they actually knew that their actions were causing you pain.
#ml writing critical#ml writing salt#adrien deserves better#marinette deserves better#I do give Luka a bit of a side eye for not getting involved after Wishmaker though#Dude's supposed to be some sort of empath and he's at his best when he's in a mentor role#He should have been allowed to be Adrien's Alya since Nino is clearly not suited for the role#Season four my belothed#kuro Neko salt#ml season 4 salt#you cannot expect someone to correct their behavior when no one is telling them that they're behaving badly#And no one calls Marinette out so of course she doesn't change her behavior!#She is shown to be willing to change when prompted too#She only knew that something was wrong post Scarabella because Alya told her#Do you really think Marinette was aware that she was hurting Chat Noir and just willfully kept doing it?#Or is it more likely that she just didn't know because no one told her?#Feel free to give Tikki some blame too because she's been a real shitty mentor for a while now#which breaks my heart because I love Tikki and Plagg and want them to be good mentors
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