#i want this event to not impact me or my regular work in any way shape or form

[wuxian-vs-wangji]

I have two extremely frustrating days of work ahead of me... An event I hate with a burning passion, so much so that they had to trick me into agreeing to work it, and then producing my show on top of all that...

So the theme of the next 2 days will be 'tension headaches'.

[hetaliahyperfix]

Hetalia Headcanons: Nation Physiology- Immortality

There's been a lot of interpretations of the nations' immortality over the years. Some people believe that nations will permanently die from a regular mortal wound like any human would while others believe nations cannot be harmed at all.

Canon seems to indicate that the latter is more of the case, with the Hetalia Horror Show stating that Finland was unable to drown when he fell into a freezing lake, but was instead suffocating endlessly, unable to die (which is pretty horrific, if you ask me).

I personally have my own headcanons as to how their immortality works. Some of it aligns with canon, and some of it deviates a little. I figure its fine since everyone kinda picks and chooses which parts of canon they like.

So, here are my headcanons (tw: violence, death, disease):

Nations cannot die the way humans do. At least, not permanently. Honestly, the idea is kind of absurd. It is impossible for them to have survived as long as they have if this was the case. China alone is over 4,000 years old and has fought in tens of thousands of battles, yet I am to believe he has not once sustained a mortal wound? What happens to the PRC if its nation persona dies from being hit by a car while being distracted by playing a mobile game on his phone? In my interpretation, nations cannot permanently die from fatal wounds, diseases, old age, and whatever other stuff that kills regular humans.

Nations can temporarily die. While they can't permanently die from mortal wounds, they can temporarily. For example, if they are shot in the head, it will kill them. However, they will heal and revive.

Nations have supernatural healing. This actually seems to be canon, based on the comic of Prussia lying about when he injured his hand, saying it was recent instead of the real answer which was a week ago, implying that healing tends to be faster for nations. In my headcanon, the nation's ability to heal depends on how strong their nation is economically, militarily, and through their overall cultural influence on the world. Currently, America and China heal the most rapidly, both being superpowers, being able to regenerate entire lost limbs in mere moments. On the other hand, Iceland has a very small GDP, no military, and very little cultural impact on the world, so he would take at least 20 seconds to heal a simple stab wound. Naturally, this healing fluctuates with the nation's power. When America was a colony, it would have taken him several minutes if he wanted to regenerate a limb. Better to just reattach the limb and heal it that way.

If the body cannot heal, a new one will be created. For example, let's say a nation fell into the ocean and is drowning. They keep dying and reviving in an endless cycle. Eventually, either through their own choice, or the supernatural natural nature of their existence, that body will permanently die and a new body will be reborn on their nation's soil. This process takes at least 24 hours and depends on how strong a nation is. America and China could probably revive 24 hours on the dot. Meanwhile, Monaco could take several days. Nations do all they can to avoid this type of death because it is, at best, highly inconvenient and it can, at worst, single handedly screw things over for them majorly. Imagine being a nation at war and having your body blown up by a bomb. By the time you revive and then travel back to the battlefield, it may already be over. This was especially awful when travel was not fast and it would take months to get somewhere.

Nations do not scar the way humans do. A nation's healing, no matter how weak they are, is perfect. It may take a while, but their bodies will go back to the way they were, meaning no scars. For a nation to receive scars, it would be based on injuries received during significant national events, especially if they are violent. For example, the French Revolution was very significant in French history so, when France was beheaded, he had a permanent, faint scar around his neck even after he healed. When the Romanovs were shot dead, ending Imperial Russia's rule, one of the bullets that bounced off the jewels they were wearing hit Russia and left a permanent bullet wound scar. Basically, a nation can end up with a permanent scar by receiving the wound during a significant, usually violent, event in their history.

Nations do not get sick the way humans do. Nations are immune to getting illnesses the way humans do. If they are around people with colds, they'll never catch a cold. They also never get terminal illnesses like cancer. There's only two things that can get a country sick: poor economy and epidemics. Honestly, this seems to be canon. Basically, if a nation's economy is doing poorly, like during the Great Depression, they will get cold/flu-like symptoms. The other way they get sick is through epidemics. Essentially, if enough people in their nation are sick, their own bodies will reflect this illness. However, since they didn't catch the illness naturally and got it though their nature as a nation, they can only stop being sick when the epidemic is over. When a nation is sick, they cannot be cured through ordinary means, they can only use medicine to alleviate the symptoms. During the Black Death, the European nations all had the bubonic plague to varying degrees for years. In fact, the bubonic plague made various resurgences over centuries. Many of them have scars from when the pustules burst and just about every one of them was extremely traumatized by it.

Nations can be effected by other types of "epidemics." For example, during the Red Scare when everyone in America was living in fear of their neighbors being communists, America became very paranoid. During the Opium Wars in China, his body began to crave opium like an addict before he even touched the stuff because nearly all his citizens were addicted, causing him to be addicted before even using. India went through at least three major famines killing over 10 million people each time from 1769-1793, so he was always underweight and hungry even if he ate during this time period.

Nations are resistant to poisons and chemicals. It takes far more poison to kill a nation than a human, although you can do it if you use a strong enough poison. I read a headcanon once that China would calmly drink a poisoned drink in front of the person who did it, just to freak them out. He 100% would do this, no debate.

Nations are vulnerable to radiation. One of the few things they are vulnerable to. While they can endure it better than humans, it is still not good. Radiation works by killing cells, via preventing them from dividing. This disrupts their ability to regenerate, so they heal slower with it.

Nations age based on economic and cultural development. This one is kinda canon. Regular humans age by the year. Nations seem to age based on the development of their country. For example, America's economy grew far faster than Canada's, and there is even a strip showing a nearly adult America next to a baby Canada despite both being born around the same time. On the opposite side of the spectrum, we see that North Italy did not age from infancy for over a 1,000 years. He was alive to have known Ancient Rome, which means he would have been born, at latest 476 AD. He did not begin to age until the Renaissance in the 1500s. As an aside, could you imagine being a baby/toddler for 1,000 years? That's honestly sounds horrific. And, based on England's shocked reaction to America's growth, it seems spending several hundred years as a baby is the norm.

So, with all of this being said, how do nations die? Well, that will be my next post. This one is already long enough so I am going to continue in another post. I hope you enjoyed my first major headcanon post! Let me know your own thoughts in the comments below.

Next Part

[deviouscrackers]

MY opinion on todays TSAMS ep

Going to try and keep this constructive, because criticism without offered solutions is just dumb. (Got a bit long, sorry)

(I've had to use data to watch it since my wifi isn't existing for some reason (like everything is working but for some reason it ain't showing up on the connect list).)

Todays TSAMS episode... hm.

What did I like about it? Well, I liked Dark Sun pressuring Sun, the desperation in Sun's voice and his reluctance to kill Nexus at first. I liked how Moon came rushing in, and the fact that both him and Solar were willing to die to protect Sun. Nexus's scream was pretty good too. I think Reed and Davis did pretty well acting-wise.

(I can't comment too much on the exact dialogue, since I had to rush through and conserve my data.)

All in all, a solid episode.

Where the episode falls flat, at least for me, is that it's very noticeably lacking something.

Ironically, it's also very similar to why I no longer watch TFF Fnaf, even though the potential of Bryan's character rotates in my brain like it's in a microwave.

Today's episode had too much buildup for what ended up being. I'm not purely talking about Nexus's death and the months of buildup, I'm talking about from a viewing stand point as well.

The "marketed appeal" (I dunno what else to call it tbh), of this particular episode set was that it was a three parter halloween special/arc finale that had the last part premiering.

The first part, The Halloween Party, did very well with the collab, the way the events took place, the editing was good... it was very solid, and I enjoyed it. It got me interested in what was to come, got me wondering who took Moon, what's going to happen next?

The second part was also excellent. Goliath versus the Dragon was a thrilling addition and Ruin helping Moon nicely showed off his character. The way Nexus yelled when he realized what had happened, nicely done too. I left that episode wondering what would happen to Ruin, who would win the dragon fight, will Sun and Moon find each other in time, will Sun's trance come into play at any point in time?

The last episode did not deliever on what the first two episodes were bringing up. The dragon did not come back, and with what Dark Sun said about not wanting to see Sun again, it most likely won't. Sun and Moon did find eachother, but it wasn't all that impactful? It felt more silly than anything else.

After writing this all, I realize what exactly I felt was missing.

The episode felt like filler, almost?

Throughout Dark Sun's regular antagonist position on the channel, and specifically near the end, after the dragon had been revealed, it felt like he had a plan. Something cooking up in the background that involved all these complex pieces. And in a way he did, but it wasn't satisfying. What was the point of the dragon? What was the point of asking Ruin how long? What was the point of all of that, if he's just going to leave? Dark Sun did almost nothing, and while I want to believe that all of it was because he that "data", he went about it in such a stupid way!

Nexus's death, while well acted, also just wasn't satisfying either.

I think ultimately, the disappointment I feel with the episode is a result of things feeling rushed, underdeveloped, or just not elaborated on. Nexus felt uncared for as a character and I think the story could've done without Dark Sun. It could also be that we just haven't seen everything that's too come with the story yet, and there's loose ends or extra stuff to be told. I want to continue watching, because I enjoy TSAMS, and I'm a huge fan of Davis and his va work.

Because I don't want to sound like all I'm doing is complaining, I want to offer a solution.

I think, something that's bogging TSAMS down as a whole, is how often it's being posted and how that really spreads the story thin. Three times a week with one "lore" episode per week would work well. Yes, that mean less daily views, but it could potentially boost the lifetime of the channel for a while. It'd be easier to catch up when a viewer has fallen behind and allow the episodes, both gaming and story, to breathe.

At the end of the day though, I don't know how the channel works, I'm not a va for the channel, I don't work for them. This is just my own opinion on it and if I write anymore I will begin rambling on about why Season 1 of TFF Fnaf was peak and the others weren't (jokes but I do think both TFF Fnaf and TSAMS have a lot of similarities when it comes to the writing issues).

Anywyayyyaahha Happy North Hemisphere Halloween, losers :P

[project-sekai-facts]

idk if I can ask u this but what is ur opinion on arata and kotaro

hello first off SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO ANSWER but no i don't mind giving my opinions on the side characters

Arata and Kotaro are actually two of my favorite side characters! I didn't like them that much at first to be honest but they've definitely grown on me a lot recently.

I think Kotaro is really overlooked actually. Like I still see people bring up his actions in the main story when he’s moved on a lot past that, and then just write him off because of it. And I mean, it’s probably because he never got too much screentime between then and Power of Unity, but since he’s been making more regular appearances I think they’ve taken his character in a really interesting direction. He initially became a singer because he wanted to be a cool older brother for his baby brother and just happened to see RW at that time, which pushed him into street music. He just did it as a passtime because he was sort of good at it. However, RW did have a big impact on him, just like it had on An and Akito, even if he was only sorta casual in the street music scene. He admits in POU that the reason he never went further was because he was afraid, and seeing VBS putting their all into it inspired him.

It’s sort of subtle up until Light Up the Fire, but Kotaro doesn't have a lot of self-esteem or confidence in his singing. I think the first time it's ever brought up is in Power of Unity as far as I remember, where he asks once or twice if he's holding everyone back. LUTF makes it really clear that he has a lot of insecurities: he believes he's holding everyone back and he believes that he has no talent compared to the others. And that's what sticks out to me, because 3/4 of VBS have felt the same way. Kohane, Akito, and Toya all at some point or another believed they were holding everyone back, be it because they were a rookie, lacking talent, or had no resolve. Kotaro has been all of those and it’s obvious that he is written the way he is to serve as a mirror character to those three. He's had the same insecurities but the way he goes about dealing with them is totally different. While VBS had each other to rely on, Kotaro doesn't have a singing partner or group. He's a solo artist. And while he works with VBS, Arata, and EVER, he isn't part of any of their groups. Even Arata who also works alone still has Souma, but more on that in a minute.

(Also just an aside, I think he’s a mirror to Kohane slightly more than the others, and that slightly being the fact that VBS is what got him inspired to take this seriously, because that’s how Kohane got inspired she saw the others and wanted to be just like them, she wanted something to throw herself into and give her all to. The fact that she’s the main one who tries to call out to him when he breaks down in LUTF I think also plays into this, like it seems to hint that she’s able to relate to him.)

I really think Kotaro is much more than how he was presented in the main story and could definitely become a pretty strong side character if he ever got an event with a bit more focus (like how Vivid Old Tale gave Nagi a lot of screentime or POU had a lot of focus on Arata). Also clpl have you ever considered giving Kotaro a partner please give him a partner. Considering you rubbed in how important singing partners are before now why haven't you even tried to give him one?

Arata has definitely been given more development than Kotaro and I genuinely think he has one of the best arcs of any side character. Like he starts out as a rival for Akito, a foil to Akito. He's basically everything Akito wants to be, and also kind of a dick. Him getting beat by Taiga though, even though it was a small moment, was definitely an important turning point for him because it put him on the same level as everyone else. Because even he has someone better than him.

Oh and his development in POU was so good I'm probably gonna go on a little tangent about his relationship with Souma now because it's so important to his character. Arata's doing all of this for Souma. Souma was the one who wanted to do street music, Souma was the one who took Arata to RW, everything was Souma's dream, but it was still important to Arata. They were partners after all. But that's what it is. Were. Even if Arata wasn't the one who was in that car accident, it still took a toll on him. Souma has been forced into a position where he isn't going to be able to achieve his dreams, so Arata has to carry all that weight on his back. Surpassing RW suddenly has become so much more important to Arata because he wants, needs, Souma's dream to become a reality. The thing is, with how caught up he was in doing everything for Souma, he approached everything on his own. Surpassing RW isn't something he can do alone; the original was a collaboration between several groups, there's no way Arata could do it alone. He needed to work with people again, which he finally realised in POU.

Actually I think one of my favorite moments in his arc has to be his showdown with Taiga in LUTF. Because he's been able to overcome what was holding him back, he's actually able to get closer to Taiga's level. That is, until Taiga drops the "we're not so different" bomb. Because that moment is so powerful. Because at that point we see Arata as less of a foil to Akito and more of a parallel to Taiga. Both of them went through a similar loss of a partner, and Taiga uses that to get under Arata's skin and he goes for a deep cut. Souma is incredibly important to Arata, and Taiga knows that and had a similar experience of losing someone important to him, and is able to see exactly what’s still holding Arata back from reaching his full potential. Arata is doing all of this for Souma. For Souma. Taiga points out that Arata isn’t carrying Souma’s dream, he’s clinging onto the idea to cope with his grief. The thing is, Souma can’t surpass RW anymore. Arata’s loaded that responsibility onto himself, without even considering his own feelings on the matter. As Taiga says, Arata is good, great even, but he can’t be the best unless he asks himself if he wants this. Arata can’t even say that he is carrying Souma’s dream, that he does want to do this and he isn’t just clinging onto the idea to cope, and it crushes him to the point of leaving Shibuya.

Honestly I think leaving was what was best for Arata in that moment. Because he does need to take a step back and just let himself actually process his grief. Because even if Souma is still alive, that partnership was still lost and Arata had dedicated everything to that partnership and to Souma, and really he still does. And honestly I think this is what he wants even if you take Souma’s dreams out of the equation, but he needs time to himself to think about what he wants. I don’t know when we’ll next see him again honestly it might be a while but I’m interested to see how that goes. Arata is surprisingly developed and nuanced for a side character and the fact the devs managed to do this across 3 events, two of which he only appears in for a couple chapters is insane. Oh yeah also I like him a bit more than Kotaro if the wall of text wasn’t obvious.

[theresattrpgforthat]

Hello! I’ve been following you for a bit now, and all of your recommendations have been super cool and interesting! If you don’t mind me asking, do you have any recommendations for really long indie ttrpgs? One that could match the length of dnd or CoD books, I mean. The specifics don’t matter as much, I just really like sinking my teeth into long game books like that.

THEME: Long Indie Games

Hello friend! Fear not, I have a multitude of long indie games to recommend for you!

Chuubo’s Marvelous Wish-Granting Engine, by Jenna Moran.

Length: 578 pages.

The Chuubo’s Marvelous Wish-Granting Engine RPG is the diceless RPG from Jenna Katerin Moran, author of the well-regarded Nobilis and an important contributor to Eos’ Weapons of the Gods and White Wolf’s Exalted RPG.

Chuubo’s is a special beast. I personally don’t know how one actually plays this game, but the book itself is fascinating to read. It has recognizable parts such as character skills, Health Levels, and XP, but I think I’d want to sit down with a physical copy to be able to properly read it and get a handle on how you play through a story. If you enjoy a challenge, or even just something enchanting and evocative, I’d recommend Chuubo’s.

Part-Time Gods, by Third Eye Games.

Length: 318 pages.

The gods of today are shadows of what the old gods possessed. Their power has been heavily diminished, and many choose to live a regular, mortal life, revealing themselves as gods only when absolutely necessary. The reason for this is twofold. First, fate doesn’t like it when the gods share their secrets with a mortal. Unless they are the god’s worshipper, terrible events and horrific accidents have a way of happening to the people closest to the god. Secondly, divine works attract creatures and monsters called Outsiders, created by the Source (after its capture) to destroy any god they encounter.

This is a game that’s on my TBR shelf - and it might stay there for a while, because this is another pretty lengthy book. I am very grateful for the index at the back of this book, because I think this would be pretty difficult to navigate. Part-Time Gods is set in the modern-day, but the premise behind your god-hood is very unique, so one of the first chapters is dedicated to telling you what exactly it means to be a part-time god, part-time taxpayer. The book also contains small pieces of prose set in the world, meant to give you a flavour of the genre and tone intended by the designer. I’m really interested in the concepts expressed in this game, and I hope I have enough brain space to read it in the future!

We Are All Mad Here, by Shanna Germain.

Length: 226 pages.

Jack climbing the beanstalk. The little mermaid finding her voice. Alice struggling with the madness of a place unruled by the laws of reality. The queen. The child. The woodsman. The knight. When you think about fairy tales, who do you become? Where does your imagination take you?

We Are All Mad Here is a tabletop game about fairytales and mental health, providing you with new options for the Cypher System while also creating a setting about visitors to a magical land called the Heartwood. In the fiction, only those who have had some kind of struggle that affects their mental health are able to travel to this magical land. Germain intends this to be a way to tell a narrative about mental health using allegory and metaphor. The Cypher system itself is pretty complex, and you probably won’t be able to play a game of We Are All Mad Here without the core rulebook, so it might be worth it to take a gander at the Cypher System Rulebook while you’re at it.

Coyote & Crow, by Connor Alexander.

Length: 484 pages.

More than 700 years ago, a massive disaster changed the course of history. The world was plunged into centuries of darkness, but the event also introduced the Adanadi — the Gift — a strange mark that appeared on all life. This mark would have an enduring impact on humanity. Centuries later, the Earth is healing. New, advanced nations have risen. Ancient legends stir.

Coyote & Crow is a pretty extensive and unique game, using pools of d12s pulled from your stats, as well as narrative beats such as character motivation, Gifts and Burdens to help give your character a personality. Because it introduces an alternate history and a drastically different future, the core book as a decent amount of lore to acquaint you with the city of Cahokia and the world that surrounds it.

This game has quite a bit of support out there, with adventures such as Stolen Heart, Laughter Lost & Found, and The Case of the Great Underwater Panther.

Impulse Drive, by Adrian Thoen.

Length: 242 pages.

Play a crew of misfits and scoundrels living a life of danger and adventure as they explore space and try to make their ship a home in a technicolor sea of stars. Fight dangerous organizations, investigate unnerving mysteries, and find trouble in a game that rewards you when your characters face their shortcomings. Grow your characters and ship with new gear and abilities as you discover and create the universe together, as a group.

For a PbtA game, Impulse Drive feels pretty substantial. It provides a quick primer on Powered by the Apocalypse games, and includes advice for the players as well as the GM. This might be because the game includes a lot of details about gear and vehicles, as this is a space game that cares what your party has on hand and what their ship can do. There’s also advice on changing the game, extra moves, and a roll table for mutations! If you’re looking to see how to play out a space adventure in a more narrative-focused system, you might want to check out this game!

The Shrike, by Alice the Candle.

Length: 162 pages.

The Shrike is a game about fantastical voyages aboard a skyship. It's inspired by Avery Alder's The Quiet Year, John Harper's Lady Blackbird, Italo Calvino, Ursula K. Le Guin, and utopian and dystopian fiction. It features four complete adventures (two multiplayer, two for solo play). 

This indie game is on the short side of this list, but it’s definitely long by indie standards. The author has provided 4 different adventures that you can read through, which will likely spark your imagination along the way. Interestingly, the voyages are placed in the first half of the book, while the information about Solo, Co-operative. and Guided Play embody the second half of the book. I’m not sure how I feel about this layout choice, but if you’re mostly looking for a book that you can read, flipping through the voyages might be more interesting to you than the rules of play.

Games I’ve Recommended in the Past

Lancer, by Massif Press. 431 pages.

The Wildsea, by Felix Isaacs. 364 pages.

Exceptionals, by Sahoni. 253 pages.

Gubat Banwa, by makpatatag. 399 pages.

Monster Care Squad, by Sandy Pug Games. 176 pages.

[maven-makes-zines]

This zine introduces us to an impactful and inspiring organization called Jane. Jane was an abortion counseling service affiliated with the Chicago Women's Liberation Union Before abortion had been made legal a group entirely made up of women (none of which were doctors or physicians) volunteered for Jane and performed over 11,000 illegal abortions while they were still operating (1968 - 1973) Due to limited writing space I encourage you to do your own research on the organization Jane or DM me for access to a digital copy of the zine.

It starts by explaining what Jane is, including texts from one of their original pamphlets from back in the day, as well as the women who upheld the organization. One woman, Surgal, talks about her experience joining the organization, counseling patients, and even, how to perform abortions herself. One thing Surgal wants you to know: the women who ran Jane aren't special in any way. According to her, they were regular people like anyone else. Surgal continues to speak about how she didn't feel special when she was volunteering. In her words, "It was just something you did because you wanted to. Afterwards it felt important..." (Pg. 19). What I love about this part is now humanizing it was to hear from real people and what their experiences were like. It's personal. But what stuck with me most was the "She Said Before 1973" section. These pages are filled with the quotes of past women who had found Jane and received an abortion there. Here are 3 quotes I found the most striking:

"When we told her she should pay what she could afford she was quiet a minute and then said, 'I think I can get nine dollars'". (Pg. 21)

"My mother always said that everything always comes down to give and take. So the baby, today, that was the taking - and me, me, my own life, I think that was the giving". (Pg. 24)

"Holding her purse, wearing her gloves, the girl clinging to her coat sleeve, she said, 'You take good care of her, she don't know no better, she's just a baby her own self..." (Pg. 22)

Reading through all these quotes I'm flooded with emotions I can't help but be reminded of current events like Roe v Wade being overturned. As you know, right now is a difficult time in American History. Donald Trump was just elected President and if you're anything like me, things probably are feeling bleak. But this is why Jane is the perfect inspo story. It's hard to believe that just a small group of women with strong opinions and a fighting spirit made such an impact. So let's follow in their footsteps. That may sound overwhelming but think small! Start by supporting your local community because, if we aren't going to be taken care of by our government we have to be there to support one another. Invite a hungry family over for dinner, drive someone to a doctor's appointment, or donate old clothes. Do what you can to support your people because when it comes down to it, we are all we have.

In many states now there will be people who become pregnant and are faced with the same decision our grandmothers also faced. That is, to keep an unwanted pregnancy or to find a way to terminate it. After reading Jane, it pains me to think what those women today must be thinking. As you know I always like to try and see the world through someone else's eyes and I think Jane does this wonderfully. The carefully selected quotes from these women told a small piece of their story and highlighted their humanity in ways I never really thought about before.

I hope this zine review made you reflect on how far we’ve come (and regressed) as well as the incredible work these women accomplished in their time. I also hope you see this as a call to action, a signal for change, and a reminder that, together, we can make a difference.

[captainsophiestark]

A Reverse Steve Rogers

Jack Thompson x Reader

Masterlist - Taglist

Requested by @hawaiianpizzaenjoyer !! Thanks for the request, and for being so patient while I got it done! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it!

Fandom: Marvel

Summary: Y/N, an Avenger, friend of Tony Stark, and the one who helped Steve Rogers adjust to the 21st century after he came out of the ice, gets flung back into the 1940s when something goes wrong on a training mission. She has no idea how long her stay in the 40s might be, but one way or another, it's going to be interesting.

Word Count: 4,684

Category: Fluff, Humor

A/N: This doesn't follow any of the season 2 timeline lol, just some vague stuff put together for the sake of this story.

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

"We could always just find another ticket for her and make up a reason for her to be there on her own..."

"Yeah? Like what? At this event, anybody with the slightest hole in their story is gonna stick out like a sore thumb.”

I looked between Peggy Carter and Daniel Sousa as they talked, frantically trying to figure out what to do with me tonight. They were currently in the middle of breaking up a secret society in Los Angeles, and they had a mission disguised as a date tonight where they'd be infiltrating a fancy party being thrown by said society.

Unfortunately for them, I'd landed in their laps (pretty literally) this afternoon, and accidentally thrown a wrench into their whole operation.

One minute, I'd been doing a training mission with the Avengers. The next, I'd been falling on top of  a desk in the SSR in 1947. I still didn't know exactly what had thrown me back in time, but no matter what the cause, the fact didn't change that I was here, and would be for the foreseeable future.

I'd almost had a heart attack when I'd looked up to see THE Peggy Carter, founder of SHIELD and total badass, standing in front of me. I think I freaked her and Daniel out a little by fangirling the minute I got up off the floor, but a stranger landing in the middle of their super high-level organization probably would've landed me in the interrogation room anyway.

Thankfully, I knew Steve Rogers pretty well, and so did Peggy. I'd mentioned his name briefly when trying to explain how I knew who she was, but then I'd been able to use what I knew about Steve and the stories he'd shared with me to convince her I was telling the truth about time travel.

Since then, we'd done some brief introductions and I'd been let out of the interrogation room. I'd been given the bare minimum details of the mission to understand the conversation, and now I sat on the edge of a desk watching Daniel and Peggy talk as they tried to adjust their plans.

"Perhaps Mr. Jarvis would be available on short notice to take her as a date..." mused Peggy.

"Whoa, Jarvis? Oh my gosh, the real person Jarvis is alive and walking around right now. That makes sense," I said, mostly talking to myself.

"That still doesn't solve the problem of them not being on the guest list," continued Daniel, he and Peggy only briefly glancing my way at the outburst.

"Maybe Howard could help us secure another two."

"He already wore out his welcome with these guys to get you in there the first time."

"Did you just say Howard? As in Howard Stark?"

Peggy and Daniel groaned in unison.

"Don't tell me you're a big fan of him too?" groaned Daniel.

"His ego's already big enough as it is," Peggy agreed.

"No, it's not that, I- uh... nevermind." I pushed off the desk, waving off thoughts of Tony. I still wasn't clear on how this time travel stuff worked, and I didn't want to go telling people about Howard Stark's currently nonexistent son without more assurance it wouldn't have any crazy impact first. "Look, you guys clearly don't have space for me in this mission. The best path is a small team, specifically a couple, who can enjoy the night like a regular date while still gathering intel and handling the mission."

Peggy and Daniel shared a look, and I could see an entire conversation passing between them. I continued.

"I might not know much about the forties, but I'm still a capable adult. I'm an Av- I was on a team with Steve to take on missions around the world. I'll be fine handling myself for a bit while you guys take care of business."

"Are you sure?" asked Peggy with a frown.

"We don't want to completely abandon you. Disappearing from your own time and reappearing in another can't be easy," added Daniel.

I gave them a faint smile, momentarily overwhelmed with memories. I'd first met Steve when he'd shown up in the future and needed someone to help him adjust. I'd been a SHIELD agent at the time, responsible for liaising with Tony Stark, so they figured helping a living legend adjust would be nothing compared to that.

They'd been right, and we'd hit it off the bat. When Tony eventually formed the team, I'd been on the roster. And now, I was the one being faced with adjusting to another time.

"It's not easy," I said to Daniel, the smile still on my face. "But I also don't need babysitters when those babysitters have important, world-saving duties to attend to. I actually have a little bit of an advantage, going back in time. I took history classes and whatnot, so I at least have some idea of how this world works."

"Well, if you're sure-"

"Alright! Sousa, Marge, fear not! The cavalry is here."

I turned at the sound of a new voice, but not before I caught Peggy and Daniel rolling their eyes so far back into their heads I couldn't see the pupils. A tall, blond man in a suit was striding across the room towards us, and a second after I started sizing him up he noticed me and did the same.

"Who's this?" he asked, coming to a stop in front of us. Peggy and Daniel didn't answer right away, apparently working together to gather mental strength before entering the conversation with this guy. I just leaned back a bit against the desk and watched.

Peggy and Daniel took a second to make significant eye contact, then sighed as one. Daniel turned to Jack, and Peggy subtly shifted closer to me.

"She's somebody who does a job like ours, but from the future," said Daniel. Jack just stared at him for a minute, then looked to me, and then back at Daniel.

"Sousa, despite what you might think, I'm not stupid."

"Jack, I get that it's hard to believe, but if you actually listen for two seconds-"

Jack huffed and crossed his arms while Daniel kept talking. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Peggy leaning in towards me, and I blocked out the boys' argument as she whispered to me.

"Y/N, I have a favor to ask of you."

"Hit me," I whispered back. Peggy sighed.

"Jack has recently had a moral epiphany," she started. I took half a second to give her a curious glance, and she just rolled her eyes in response. "It's been mostly nice, both to have him on our side and to finally have him respecting me and Daniel and anyone that's not an older man already in power.

"That said, we don't have space for him on this mission. All he's going to do is be a nuisance, and he's far less likely to agree to being benched than you."

"And I take it you have a solution for this?"

"Yes. But it would require throwing you under the bus to keep him occupied tonight."

I paused for a second, giving Jack another good look. He and Sousa were still in the middle of a heated argument while Sousa tried to convince him I was actually a time traveler, and even though they both seemed exasperated, Jack also seemed to be enjoying the back and forth. A smile tugged at the corner of my mouth.

"Peggy Carter, it would be an absolute honor to assist you on a mission," I said, turning to her with a smile. "Even if it means spending the evening learning about the forties from a slightly questionable teacher."

"You're a lifesaver," she said, giving me a smile back. She pushed off the desk, moving towards Daniel and Jack to interrupt them but shooting me a wink first. "And don't worry, I'll give you an actual introduction to the decade after this mission is over."

I nodded, then Peggy got Jack and Daniel's attention to put their argument to rest and explain the situation. Jack raised an eyebrow when Peggy told him his job would be keeping me company, but she phrased it well enough that it didn't quite sound like babysitting for either of us. Finally, he agreed, and Peggy and Daniel headed out for their event, leaving me and Jack Thompson alone in the bullpen of the LA SSR.

He stood by the windows, staring out at the traffic below as I spun around in a swivel chair. I kept looking at him, but he didn't look over at me once, at least not that I could catch. Finally, after a few more rotations, I huffed a sigh and pushed myself up. I put my hands on my hips, but Jack still didn't look over.

"Alright, I'm bored out of my mind, which should not be a possibility less than three hours after I suddenly appeared in a different time period," I said. Jack finally looked over at me, raising an unimpressed eyebrow as he did. I continued. "You're supposed to be helping me adjust to this place, since I don't know how long I'm gonna be here. Believe it or not, it didn't take me that long to adjust to this office."

He sighed heavily, but stepped away from the window anyway, stopping a few feet in front of me with his arms across his chest. He stared at me for a few seconds without saying anything, and I just stared right back. I crossed my arms to mirror him and he snorted and rolled his eyes.

"You're really from the future?" he finally asked.

"Did the twenty minutes Peggy and Daniel spent convincing you not settle this matter?"

He grunted, then finally dropped his arms back to his sides.

"Fine. What do you want to do then?"

I grinned. "Any good places to grab a drink and a dance around here?”

****************

"This is only my first week in LA, so if this place ends up being terrible, it's the city's fault and not mine," said Jack as we stepped out of the cab together. I'd taken a second to find a dress to steal from Peggy's emergency disguise stash at the SSR, since my 21st century mission clothes would probably cause a riot if I went out in them, and then Jack and I had jumped in a cab to a spot in town he'd heard about.

"Boooo," I teased as he paid the driver and we headed in together. "You can't consider the possibility of the night being a failure before it's even started! It's a jinx."

"A jinx?"

"Yeah, you know. Like bad luck."

"I know the definition of the word jinx," he scoffed. "I just think it's ridiculous you believe in them."

"Oh, yeah, of course. Actually, I didn't want to tell Peggy and Daniel this, but in the future we've discovered that a lot of things people dismissed as superstitions or bad luck are actually true. Like jinxes. Oh, and breaking a mirror? That actually will mess you up! We didn't realize it until science advanced a little further, I think in the seventies, but it's true."

Jack stared at me for a few seconds, and I stared back with a perfectly neutral expression on my face. Then, he broke into a grin and nudged me with his shoulder.

"You're messing with me."

"I definitely am."

He scoffed and shook his head, but the smile didn't drop off his face. He sighed dramatically, looking up at the club in front of us, then held out his arm for me to take.

"C'mon. You're the one who wanted to experience the time period."

I smiled up at him, then looped my arm through his. He pulled me a little closer, and I'd be lying if I said my heart didn't speed up a bit as we walked into the club together.

Immediately I got hit with the music I associated with the swinging jazz of the 1940s as we stepped into a world of men in suits and women in old-style dresses, all twirling across the dancefloor together.

"Whoa," I breathed. Suddenly, it started to sink in that I was actually in the 1940s, more than 80 years from everything and everyone I knew. A new surge of sympathy for Steve welled up in my chest.

"You alright?" asked Jack, nudging me a little as we stood in the doorway. I took a deep breath in and out, then slowly nodded. "Okay, good. Let's go get a drink.”

I huffed a laugh as he pulled me through the crowd and towards the bar. We managed to find two stools, and Jack pulled my seat out for me before I sat down. I couldn't help giving him a slightly bemused look, which he grunted about as he took the seat next to me.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," I said, waving him off. "Just, you know... forties."

He turned to stare at me, his eyebrows knit together, but the bartender appeared before he could question what I was talking about.

"What can I get the two of you?" asked the bartender. Jack turned to me, letting me go first.

"I'll have an old fashioned, please."

Both he and Jack looked at me for a second, but I looked right back at both of them like they were crazy for questioning it (because they were). After a second, Jack shrugged and turned back to the bartender.

"I'll do the same."

The bartender nodded, then moved away to make the drinks. I turned and gave Jack a smile.

"Thanks for buying," I said. "I didn't have my wallet on me when I got sucked back in time, and even if I did, I don't think the bartender would be able to accept the kind of bills I carry. I'm not trying to get arrested for counterfeiting a few hours into being in the past."

Jack chuckled. "Sure thing. So, an old fashion, huh?"

"Yeah. It's Ton- uh, it's my friend's favorite drink. He got me drinking them, too."

"Hm. Future sounds like a wild place."

"Honestly, I'd say 1940 is a little wilder."

The bartender set down our drinks, and Jack put a few bills on the table. Then, once he was out of earshot again, I turned to Jack with a smile.

"Cheers," I said, raising my glass in toast. "To new experiences and getting to know each other and this weird ass trip back to the past."

Jack smiled, although I could tell he was fighting it, and clinked his glass with mine before we both took a sip.

"So, Jack Thompson... tell me about the forties."

Jack and I spent the next hour talking about everything from foods that hadn't been invented yet (ranch dressing!) to the weird, national popularity of baseball and how I couldn't wait to see people start getting the memo about the NBA. Some of it was informative, even helpful, but for the most part we just... talked. Laughed. Joked around and enjoyed each other's company like people who'd known each other much longer than a few hours.

For some reason, it just felt easy. Going into this, heading out with someone who was clearly a confident, if not arrogant, man from the 1940s, with Peggy's warnings on top of everything else? Well, let's just say I didn't have the highest of hopes. But by some miracle, whether it was our equally loud and teasing personalities or that fact that I proudly didn't know anything about baseball beyond the fact that games took way too long, rather than the ignorance or indifference he had been expecting... Jack Thompson and I got on like wildfire.

"I'm just saying, when you're watching a legend play, that's the only part of the game that matters!" Jack continued, defending his baseball stance. "And DiMaggio's a legend."

"Yeah, no shit," I scoffed, rolling my eyes to go with it. Jack snorted at my language, but I caught him grinning at me all the same as he took a sip from his drink. "But, unlike in other sports, your legend's only playing for like fifteen minutes out of every hour. Still boring!"

Jack opened his mouth, clearly ready with some other comeback that would do absolutely nothing to change my position, but before he could, the band started up with something I actually recognized.

"Oh my God!" I cried, setting down the now-empty glass that previously held my second old fashioned. "This song- we have to go dance!"

"You know this song?" asked Jack, only looking slightly bemused as he set down his glass and I dragged him towards the dance floor.

"Yeah. Steve plays it all. The damned. Time," I said, finally coming to a stop in the middle of the floor. I moved to drop Jack's hand now that I'd gotten him out here, but he just squeezed it tighter and pulled me closer. "It's one of the only songs from the forties he plays that I can actually stand."

Jack scoffed, wrapping an arm around my waist as we started twirling across the floor together. "You're actually friends with him? Sousa wasn't making that whole thing up?"

"What? No. Actually, I'm the one that helped him adjust to the future not long after he woke up in my time."

Jack nodded, looking thoughtful. "So that's why you recognized Carter? Sousa said you almost fainted from excitement when you first saw her."

"No. I mean, sort of, I guess. But I would've known her even without Steve. She's only the coolest, most badass woman and intelligence pioneer the world has ever known," I said. Jack snorted, and I scowled. "What? You disagree?"

He shrugged. "I mean, I'd probably argue there are some other intelligence pioneers that deserve mention. But... I guess no, I don't necessarily disagree. Just don't mention it to her, alright? I'll deny it, and I don't need her immortalization from a time traveler being thrown in my face every time I work a case with her for the rest of time."

I laughed, and Jack gave me a knowing smile before spinning me out and away from him. He twirled me across the floor before pulling me back to him quickly. We moved in perfect harmony, picking up our pace to match the band and putting the other couples to shame. We quickly got lost in our own little world, to the point that everyone and everything except the music disappeared. When Jack sped up, I sped up a little more, and we easily met each other's challenges, stupid smiles on our faces the whole time.

When a slower song started playing, Jack and I finally relaxed the pace, forgoing the elaborate dance moves to just sway in place and catch our breaths for a minute. I was still a little lost in our moment, enough so that I didn't notice someone else approaching us until he shoved himself part way between me and Jack.

"Hey doll. Mind if I cut in?" The guy leered over me, totally ignoring Jack as he reached for my hand without waiting for my answer. I scoffed, my tired-but-happy smile instantly turning into a scowl. Jack seemed equally frustrated and moved as if he was about to step in and do something about it, but I decided to just take care of it for the both of us.

"Actually, yeah, I do mind," I snapped, fixing the guy with an unimpressed look as I snatched my hand out of his reach. He seemed incredibly surprised by my response, but I plowed ahead anyway. "I'm dancing with someone already, and even if I weren't, I have no interest at all in dancing with you. So... scram. Or beat it. Or whatever people say now."

The man just stood there for a second, open-mouthed, blinking at me in stunned silence. Then, his expression shifted into a scowl and his face started to turn red.

"I- You- How dare you-!"

"Dude, get lost," I said, crossing my arms and staring him down as I talked over him. I glanced over his shoulder to Jack, who also looked shocked but in a pleasantly surprised way, and addressed him. "What's another good way to tell someone to go away?"

He shrugged, a delighted smile growing on his face. "Take a powder?"

"Really?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. Jack just nodded, so I looked back at the rude guy. "Alright, take a powder. Hit the bricks. Take a long walk off a short pier. Other creative ways to say leave. I want to dance to this lovely song with my dance partner here, who is not you, so... yeah. Take the blatant instructions."

The man whirled around to Jack, like he expected him to say or do something to reign me in. Jack just shrugged again.

"You heard the lady. I'm not gonna tell you anything she didn't already say."

The man scowled, whipping back to look at me again. I just met him with crossed arms and a look that told him I wouldn't be budging an inch. He spluttered a few more incoherent words in indignation, then stormed off the dance floor and out of sight. I sighed, then faced Jack again.

"How wildly out of place was that for the time period? Both him and me?" I asked. Jack grinned.

"Him? Not very. You? Insanely," he said, taking my hand again as we went back to gently swaying in place. He tugged me a little closer to his chest, and I smiled. "I gotta say though, I sure enjoyed watching it."

"Good. Because I don't actually care at all, and I had a lot of fun doing that."

Jack laughed, throwing his head back before fixing me with a brilliant smile. He twirled me out and away from him again, then pulled me right back into his chest. We swayed together, closer than we'd been all night, and to my surprise I started noticing more than a few butterflies squirming in my chest as I stared up at the SSR Chief. Hm, noted the more logical side of my brain as we moved across the crowded dance floor. Nice, my heart replied as Jack's strong hand laid firmly on my waist and my hand traveled to the collar of his shirt.

Jack and I spent the rest of the night at the club, enjoying the music, the dancing, and each other's company until the place turned on the lights and threw us out. A few times, other men came up to hit on me and "steal me away" from Jack. Each time, I dressed them down and sent them on their way, and each time Jack just grinned and watched me do it. I could still tell he was ready to jump in, that his instinct was to take care of it for me, but he seemed to enjoy watching the jerks splutter and babble in shock and surprise as much as I did.

Afterwards, when we wandered back out onto the LA street together, Jack insisted on escorting me back to Howard Stark's place, where I'd be staying with Peggy. It was going to be incredibly weird staying at Tony's dad's house, meeting him and the real-human Jarvis, but I could process that later. Right now, I wanted to focus on the amazing, less-weird parts of being in the 40s. Specifically Jack Thompson, who I'd just spent a wonderful night enjoying this new time period with.

Jack hailed us a cab, and I rested my head on his shoulder and watched the city go by as the taxi took us out of the city, to the massive Stark mansion. It was basically a 40s version of Tony's Malibu house, and a pang of sadness tightened in my chest when I realized I had no idea when–or if–I would see my friends again.

I took a deep breath and shook those thoughts out of my head as the car came to a stop. All of that was a problem for later, not now. Jack got out first, holding the door for me and offering a hand to help me out, which I took. Rather than dropping it once I stood, he wrapped it around his arm as he asked the cabbie to wait and escorted me towards the house. We stopped on the porch and turned to face each other, and I realized I actually really didn't want the night to end.

"Thanks for showing me around the forties," I said, giving Jack a small smile. "It was actually really fun."

"You don't have to sound so surprised," he griped, but a smile made its way onto his face all the same. "So... I don't know how long you're gonna be here, and obviously we've got a lot of other work to do with Carter and Sousa tomorrow, but... maybe I could take you out again sometime. There's still a lot of forties you haven't seen yet."

"I'd like that," I said, a warm feeling welling up in my chest. I hesitated a second as Jack and I stared at each other on the doorstep, then decided to say fuck it and keep doing what I'd been doing all night: following my impulses. "Quick question: in the forties, if I kiss you on the first date, is that going to scare you off or something?"

Jack grinned. "It might get a raised eyebrow from the cabbie, but I sure as shit won't be complaining."

"Good."

With that, I grabbed Jack's lapels and tugged him towards me, leaning up just a bit and giving him a kiss. It was short, really just a quick peck since we'd just met, but fireworks exploded in my chest at the sensation anyway.

Jack's grin stayed in place as we pulled apart, and his hand lingered on my waist an extra second before dropping to his side. He took a step backwards, towards the waiting car, even as his eyes stayed on mine. I rested my hand on the doorknob, watching Jack and trying to stay in the moment even as he walked away.

"Welcome to the forties, sweetheart," he called as he made it down the porch steps and into the driveway. "I'll see you at work tomorrow."

I waved, a smile on my own face to match his. "Can't wait."

Jack gave a short wave and one last grin before getting into the cab. I watched as he drove away, a smile still on my own face even after I knew he couldn't see it. Finally, after the lights of the cab faded back into the LA night, I turned on my heel and walked into the house.

I'd been in the 40s for less than twelve hours, and I knew for a fact that I hadn't even scratched the tip of the iceberg on exploring the time period, or what frustrations being eighty years removed from everything I knew would bring. But, despite all that, I'd had a blast tonight, and tomorrow I'd get to start working with THE Peggy Carter. Whether I was only here for another few hours or it turned into months or longer, I couldn't help being excited at the idea of everything that was yet to come for me, not least of all my next date with Jack Thompson.

[nainainomi]

Very indulgent squid game rant and ig some analysis later on

spoilers ish, was going to say they weren't very important but then my rant was derailed and I end up saying some very late in game spoilers so ya

Have seen a lot of memes poking fun of Gi-hun for his whole "I've played these games before, but not alot on how dumb his plan was. Like I understand he's not some super scholar, but like really lining them up in a line like dominos... do you not see how that could go wrong. My defense for being harsh about this is A) this is his second time, he had time to think about this event he shouldn't have been as panicked. and b) why did EVERYONE listen to him, when they all got back they all got suspicious with him, where was this suspicion DURING the game?!?! along with the fact that this is games you're familiar with, they're CHILDREN GAMES, who WHO goes to red light and green light and makes a conga line. Ok so they were trying to not get shot, so a little bit different from the child's game, but it's not a first thought. If some random guy was telling me if we lose we die, and get in a line I'd be like 'wtf no I'll play the game the way i was playing currently just more cautious.

This next thought can be thrown away since they were under pressure of like a bunch of people being killed, but also NO ONE else thought this was a bad idea. There was no one who thought that seems dangerous I'm not going to listen to this guy.

I saw a youtuber mention that the line could get you hit by like the bullet hitting someone else and then going through them and traveling and hitting you ( since you're in a line), but that's not my real problem with this because first we've not seen any examples of that happening, whether it's movie magic or the guns are calibrated or made (idk anythign about guns) the distance away the guns are allows for the bullets to not go through multiple people and also I'm skeptical because the games are meant to be fair so their would be precaution against that and since they're in a line the snipers form the sides can just get them... ->

SO my problem with it is the whole domino situation, the person infront of you is shot, they fall back onto who, YOU.

Even more to this, why would you trust the players behind you. See I'm not saying in a game of life and death I would do what Thanos did, but im a regular ol game of red light green light I probably have done what Thanos did. Maybe I'm a paranoid person but me personally if I knew I would get shot for moving I would not put myself in shoving distance anyone.

All this to say, honestly don't know how I would actually react if I was put into this extreme situation, maybe I'd end up doing all of this.

But wow it rly bothers me because Gi-hun has the advantage and he made such a dumb plan. I sorta feel validated bc Thanos did push someone so the flaws I'm seeing ARE there and aren't me being like completely unreasonble. But maybe that says something about Gi-hun, even though he's no longer smiling like he did in S1, he's still an optimist at heart, he wants to save everyone, he wants to trust everyone, and trust them to not only save themselves but others aswell. And it just doesn't work out for him. Though he's obviously traumatized by the first games he's still himself at heart. Hoping that everyone will follow his lead and that he can lead them away from their deaths.->

which really highlights the cruelty of all these games, by not just showing us people are dying, we see these people dying from the view of our protagonist who's trying so hard and yet he can't win. We see how cruelly the games treat Gi-hun's hopes, he is crushed by the games, and that is probably more impact to us the viewers than most of the deaths. I don't mean the side charaters death's, the people who we got to see their stories, but think of all the extras who's names we don't even know. Did you really care about their deaths, no you didn't get to know them, maybe you felt anger at the games but they have no emotional attachment to your heart. SO Gi-hun is the one who truly allows us to feel pain for the deaths the game causes, because Gi-hun feels that pain and feels that guilt.

He tries to lead them in red light green light, but the chain is disrupted and people die, the one guy he hoped to save at the very end PASSED the line, and yet he was shot down after the game. He has a nightmare about everyone following him and choosing triangle, just for it to end up harder-> and you know what's even more important about that dream, they follow him, he is leading them, just to fail them again. Gi-hun LEADS a revolt, and all those who followed him died except Hyun-ju (and player001 but yk).

Anyway also think that next season the rest of the players are definitely going to turn on him, they've already been suspicious of him and then he got a lot killed following him. So yay more guilt for him.

[leaderoffestivals]

Poltergeist Epilogue 1

Natsume: By the wAY, why have you been painting on that canvas for so loNG?

Scenario Writer: Akira Season: Winter Characters: Mikejima Madara, Narukami Arashi, Sakasaki Natsume, Aoba Tsumugi

<A few days later, at the festival event held at Dancing Cranes Home.>

Madara: [HAHAHA! A RIOTOUS MYRIAD OF COLOURFUL FLOWERS! FIERY BLOOMS ARE ABOUT TO COVER THE NIGHT SKY!

LOOK UP, CHILDREN! SEE THAT EVEN IN THIS WORLD, FLAMES OF SUCH SURPASSING BEAUTY CAN EXIST AS WELL!]

Tsumugi: Seriously?! Setting off fireworks in front of children with fire-related trauma is the most thoughtless thing I’ve ever heard of. Do you not even have the smallest shred of empathy at all?

Natsume: That’s a topic you have no right to judge others oN, Senpai. BesidES, the children appear excited and are unexpectedly enjoying the shOW.

After aLL, even if someone hates bell peppers with all their heaRT, they'll think them delicious when wrapped in tasty meAT; and carrots one usually avoids like the plague will be welcomed happily when baked into a sweet caKE.

The children’s hearts and psyches seem strong and resilient enough to handle this muCH, at leaST.

HowevER, this is a brutally rough approach to theraPY. The worst case scenario could have resulted in all the children breaking down into hysterical tears and the festival being cancelED. 

Madara: Hahaha. It’s true, watching the show for too long might cause them discomfort, so I did make sure not to overdo it. However, it just isn’t a festival without fireworks, you knowww——

And we should try everything we can to lift the gloom from the children’s hearts, even if just by a little, riiight?

Arashi: That's right. We’re nothing more than temporary caregivers at Dancing Cranes Home, not meant to make a deep impact in the children’s lives, but even so—

Even if we’re just pretending or this is all just a facade, at this moment, we are the children’s guardians too. 

I want to help relieve their suffering somehow, even if what we do has only the tiniest effect. 

Arashi: ——When I was a child a lo~ng time ago, I was suffering too—

But because I was a child at the time, I didn't realise I was in pain.

It was like I was a land animal, born by mistake in the middle of the sea. And while I believed I was living the same kind of life like everyone else, I couldn’t shake the feeling I was choking and gasping for air.

It wasn’t until I began working as a child model and started comparing myself with other children——

That I realised for the first time how pitiful a child I had been.

That’s when I started to fall apart. Even though I had been absolutely fine up to that point—

With the sudden realisation of my situation, everything became overwhelming, suffocating, and terrifying.

My parents—my family—felt absolutely no interest in me at all. All of them prioritised their own lives over mine, neglecting me entirely.

But, because they justified it all saying it was done for my sake, insisting it was the “cool” way to live—

And because I didn’t know any better, I believed everything they said. 

Tsumugi: … … … It must have been hard, not receiving the love you needed from your family, huh?

Arashi: Exactly. Isn’t love supposed to be something parents give to their children without question, like regular meals or a warm bed to sleep in?

Arashi: But for me, I didn’t get any of that—or at least, I wasn’t given enough of it. That’s why I fled that home, desperately seeking out whatever it was I was missing—

But here’s the kicker—I’d no idea what I was even looking for, because my parents had never shown me what that something was.

Arashi: But then… someone came along and saved me.

He didn’t do anything extraordinary. He just, in the most ordinary way, showered me with the things my dazzling family couldn’t be bothered to do for me—

He cared for me, showed concern when I was struggling, and actually listened attentively to me when I vented about my troubles.

He saw me as a person, recognised me frankly, and treated me as an equal.

It was like he truly saw me—the real me—who was physically there yet feeling like I didn’t exist for anyone at all (2)—

And because of him, the pain I carried was eased just a little—

And for the very first time, it felt like I could actually breathe.

He brought into my life the air I so desperately craved—the kind everyone else seems to get from their parents without fail. It was like one of those fairy tales, where the prince brings the princess back to life with a kiss.

That's the reason why I still love everything about that person, to this very day.

Arashi: And that's also why… 

I want to be that person for the children who are hurting like I was——just like what he was to me.

Please don’t get me wrong, okay? I'm not doing this for you, Mama. I’m doing this purely for me.

Madara: Yup, I'm totally cool with thaaat. We're not comrades from the same Unit; we’re just colleagues who happen to work in the same place. 

However, if we’re aiming for the same goal, we should be able to join forces and work together.

That’s something I’ve learned from my time in Double Face.

Arashi: Fufufu~. Looks like Mama has achieved some personal growth too, huh? Well done, good job ♪

Madara: Hmmm? And who exactly are you to be making that comment to me?

Natsume: FufuFU. WeLL, in any caSE, Mikejima-senpai is the star of this shOW—or at leaST, officialLY, anywAY. That’s why we will be following Senpai’s leAD—

Or rathER—we’ll be providing support so you can achieve whatever it is you’re aiming fOR.

The kitten’s request to get to the bottom of what happened to her frieND, NEGI-chan, was completed pretty satisfactoriLY, if I might say sO— 

And since I’m pleased with how things turned oUT, I’ll stick around a while longer to help you out as a special serviCE.  

After aLL, I’m a childcare worker at Dancing Cranes Home tOO. I’ve got obligations and responsibilities to this place as weLL. 

Tsumugi: Exactly. We’re all part of NEW DIMENSION, and that alone is reason enough for us to support one another, don’t you think?  

Madara: Huh? NEW DIMEN—… … Ohhh, that’s NEWDI’s official name, isn’t it? We’ve been using the shortened name so often that I’ve forgotten that’s what we’re reeeally called! 

Tsumugi: Oh, come on. The bar of your loyalty is set so low, I’m honestly impressed, instead.   

Natsume: WeLL, that doesn’t really matTER, does iT? We might be the smallest and weakest of the four big agencIES, but that’s precisely why we’re free from the various pressures and constraints imposed by the higher-uPS—

Which allows our idols the freedom to do as they please and achieve the goals they set for themselVES.  

That’s a unique advantage given to us by our agenCY, wouldn’t you agrEE?

Tsumugi: Indeed, that’s true. I might be tooting my own horn here, but our agency truly is a great place, isn’t it? 

Mikejima-kun, Narukami-kun, if you both felt the same way too, nothing would make me happier as Vice-President! 

Madara: HAHAHA! Well, I guess after being here for so long, I can’t help but grow quite fond of our agency, too~.

Anyway! This isn’t the time for leisurely chit-chatting, riiight? Our time in this place is running out.

Let's proceed to the final act of our project: the festival.

Natsume: Just like we plannED, rigHT? The staff here gave us free rein over the conteNT, so we came up with the ideas togethER.

By the wAY, why have you been painting on that canvas for so loNG?

Madara: Nope, I’m not painting, I’m restoring it. I’ve already finished what you’d call the main work a while ago; I’m just putting the final touches on it now. 

Tsumugi: Wow! You’re really talented, Mikejima-kun~! You can do just about anything, can’t you?

Madara: Umu… … Look, Natsume-san. You were there with me when I found it, weren’t you? This is the large painting that had been discarded like garbage.

The painting itself isn’t anything remarkable; it’s just an ordinary piece that probably wouldn’t sell for much—

And of course, there’s no secret code hidden in it like you’d see in the movies. 

However, to the children of Dancing Cranes Home, this painting definitely meant a great deal to them—

Because this painting was always hanging in NEGI-san’s room, she who tragically died in the fire. 

Arashi: Yes, that's right. Somehow, it was protected under a collapsed wall and miraculously survived the blaze.

Since it remained intact against all odds, the children couldn't bear to see it being thrown away with the trash—

Because to them, that painting was inseparable from the memory of their beloved friend, NEGI-chan—

Forever shining brightly together in their memories.

—————-To be continued——————

Chapter 17 / Epilogue 2

Translator’s Notes:

Arashi has 2 parents and an older brother. The person who helped Arashi was Kunugi Akiomi. You can read about how they first met in the Scout story "Lookback: Portrait".

This could be a reference to a Moomin story about a little girl, Ninny, who became invisible because she was unloved, and after being cared for by Moomin, turned visible again.

This isn’t proofed, so if you spot any mistakes, please DM me.

[nariism]

links ➠ event masterlist ✧ rules ✧ send a request!

STATUS: CLOSED

thank you everyone for participating <3

hiii all my lovelies💗 i'd like to give a huge huge huge thank you for 1k followers and friends (!!!), 4.5 months of endless support, and the chance to be a part of such an amazing community of people :')

i've always been on and off with writing because of my self-doubts but i've come to absolutely love writing as a hobby and remember why i enjoyed it so much in the first place back when i was a dweeby 13 year old kid 🫶

i would love to do a small appreciation writing event for anyone who would like to participate. it's open for everyone so don't feel nervous to send an ask! see below the cut for more info.

if you're just stopping by, then i'd like to tell you thank you for everything!! 💐

info — you choose 1-3 prompts/tropes + a character and i'll write a drabble/one-shot! requests can be sent to my inbox like this (preferably off anon so i can let you know when it's up!)

prompt number: fandom/character: additional info: (ex. tropes you want, angst, fluff, platonic, etc. anything you'd like to add that you want to see!)

i will be closing requests for this event on 13 Nov EDT

the same rules apply as my regular writing rules. please see those before you send a request!

note. all writings will be x gn!reader. i have free creative liberty for anything i write and i may not get around to all of the requests if i can't think of anything for the combination submitted. i am also busy with life stuff so it might take me a bit to finish things. remember, this is all for fun!

FANDOMS/CHARACTERS OPEN

blue lock: itoshi sae, itoshi rin, isagi yoichi

genshin impact: open for any characters!

haikyuu: miya atsumu, miya osamu, kita shinsuke, ushijima wakatoshi

other: hayakawa aki, gojo satoru, geto suguru, loid forger (💐)

++ i would consider characters not listed here that you want to see!

TROPES

1. friends to lovers / childhood friends to lovers

2. forced proximity

3. fake relationship / marriage of convenience

4. soulmates (any rendition)

5. coffee shop

6. roommates

7. accidental confession / accidental kiss

8. handcuffed together

9. hurt & comfort

10. enemies / rivals to lovers

11. mutual pining

12. oblivious pining

13. one bed

14. drunk confession

15. second chance

16. unrequited love

17. matchmaking / matchmaking gone wrong

18. domestic

PROMPTS

19. "do we like... hold hands now?"

20. "please, come home."

21. "i could kiss you right now!"

22. "oh no, the power went out, however will we stay warm?!" (/s)

23. "we fell asleep by accident and woke up as a mess of tangled limbs."

24. "i'm done waiting."

25. "i've always needed you!"

26. "you look so beautiful in the moonlight."

27. "i think i'm in love with you."

28. "don't look at me that way."

29. "do you want my jacket?"

30. "wait, don't pull away... not yet."

31. "i can't sleep."

32. "i can't believe it took you this long to admit you like being the little spoon."

33. "your necklace fell off... let me put it back on for you."

34. "i could stay up all night talking to you."

35. "say it again. please."

36. "we're fighting. i'll take the couch tonight." ➡️ (bonus) "we were fighting???"

++ feel free to add any you want! these are just some examples

i'm so thankful to each and every one of you. i hope you enjoy! <3

links ➠ event masterlist ✧ rules ✧ send a request!

© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.

[mania-sama]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "mania-sama "?

Hi!! Thank you so much for sending me an ask!! I will answer the story behind my name first, and then I'll get into the fics!

mania.sama comes from a couple years back when I was making my first online persona account. I had my regular Instagram account with my real name, but I didn't feel comfortable with people I knew in real life knowing the content I engage with and want to post (fandom-related and gaming clips). At the time, a couple of my beloved friends had these Instagram accounts all starting with a mental disorder and ending with a Japanese honorific. Weird combo, I know, I don't know how the trend started, I don't ask questions around here. Anyway, we brainstormed and decided on the mania, as in the manic disorder, and sama, a Japanese honorific of high respect. I would change it since I'm well aware it's kinda cringe since I have absolutely no Japanese heritage whatsoever, but it's too iconic to change now. All of my online persona accounts have this name, and people have called me "Mania" for far too long on Ao3. I'd hate to switch it up on people. And besides, I think it's grown on me after all this time.

Now for the fic!! So, I'm going to be so, so for real right now. I only have three fics I have bookmarked publically on Ao3, and they are my only favorite fics. Three. This comes from the fact that I read mainly one-shots that I forget as soon as I read them. I don't really have the attention span nor want to read long-form works most of the time. So, I did a lot of digging to come up with the rest of the seven, but I want to list favorite three first because they are actually my favorite. They aren't ranked in any particular order, they are just above the rest of the seven (which are also in no particular order).

These following three fics are also the only fanfics to ever make me cry. I've come close to a few of them, but these, of all my years reading and writing fanfic, are the only three to manage to bring tears down my face thus far:

Come Morning Light by SharkbaitSekki -> Haikyuu | 354,105 words | 15 chapters -> Teen and Up | Completed | Locked Work -> Summary: All in life will come and go. People and places will ebb and flow. Fate's dealt cards can't be foreseen. Safety is obsolete. When a nuclear blast on the island of Japan destroys all of the families and dreams within its radius, all that is left in the aftermath is to rebuild something -anything- out of the debris. Back to back, heart to heart, it's a long way up for the kids who have seen their lives go down in flames. But once at the top, for those who have made it, there is nothing left to do but admire the view. In which all of the aspects of their future are uncertain, except for the fact that unity will always lead them home. -> Thoughts: This was the only fic I had as my favorite fic for a long time, and the only one of the three to have an objectively sad ending, though it's listed as ambiguous. There isn't a dead dove tag on here, but there should be because this fic is gruesome, horrific, and downright traumatizing. And you know what? It's amazing, every single 350k words of it. The way some of these characters died, the trauma they experienced, and the ways they didn't or did move forward. It's all so impactful, and each character has a special focus. Not a single one goes without a spotlight. It also says it has ships, but none of them are actually canon, just vaguely implied. I don't really know how to explain this, but everything they go through, all of the places they go to, and the events that occur because of the nuclear bomb itself (such as acid rain and food poisoning) are all so well done, original, and thought-out. A town where all crime is legal at night but you must remain perfectly civil in daytime (as well as not talk about said crimes committed the previous night), radio broadcasts, refugee camps, trafficking, and more. There are just so many stand-out concepts and scenes that will stick with me forever.

one hundred miles by No_one_you_know -> Dream SMP | 126,898 words | 3 work series -> Teen and Up | Completed* -> that's, like, a hundred miles | 60,444 words | 12 chapters | Completed -> he's my brother, i just raise him | 7,034 words | 1 chapter | Completed -> as long as i'm here | 59,420 words | 14 chapters | Completed -> Summary (using the first fic): Dream would kill him. Dream was going to kill him- he was going to- no, he wouldn’t. Dream was his friend- friends don’t hit each other- Dream was supposed to take care of him- Dream /was/ taking care of him. It hurt to breathe. It hurt to think. He couldn’t clear his thoughts as he stumbled to the family computer, pulling up a tab on google and frantically typing the name into the search bar. The words Technoblade Watson stared back at him, the little black bar at the end of the letters blinking slowly, mocking him. Why, of all people, did it have to be Technoblade? in short: the one where dream sucks as a parental figure, tommy runs away, and visits his least favorite family member technoblade -> Thoughts: I KNOW. I know what you're thinking. Dream SMP? Really? Listen. It was a different time, lads, and I, for one, refuse to be ashamed of my history with Dream SMP. I read and wrote fics and enjoyed it. What gives? Anyway. I chose the entire series instead of one fic because all of these fics are so good, and I feel that if you read the first one, you should read the others. This is the ultimate series of "Healing is not linear." It's a work on the failures of society, of the justice system, how life can be repeatedly cruel over and over again. All of the doubling back, the mental fight, the complex relationships, morally gray actions, and the brilliant display of the way trauma can effect children, and the way that adults can get away with so much abuse. I think about how he walked a hundred miles only to wind back in the same place again. Obviously, it ends positively (relatively positively), but it takes just as long to get there. Secretely, though, adoption fics are a guilty pleasure of mine and you can't take that away from me. EXTREMELY well written. * the series says it's not completed, but it sure feels like it is. Very conclusive ending, I don't think the author intends on ever updating again, so I think the "Not Completed" status is simply a mistake on their part.

When I Awake by wildflowertea -> Bungou Stray Dogs | 235,960 words | 23 chapters -> Mature | Completed -> Summary: Dazai Osamu has been in a coma for exactly one year, seven months, and twenty-two days. But Death still refuses to take him. Trapped in the space between worlds, and unable to die, Dazai waits, killing what precious time he may have left and hoping—praying—that his family will pull the plug and move on. He doesn't expect someone to move into his old apartment instead. Nakahara Chuuya, two-time Grammy awards winner, and freshly unemployed pessimist, has never believed in fate—much less the supernatural. But the lively—if a bit annoying—ghost of his apartment's previous tenant, might just change everything. -> Thoughts: What isn't there to say about this? I have written many comments under this fic, so if you want to hear my full thoughts, they are all there in the last chapter. I also added another comment months later, and will probably add another one in the future. This fic single-handedly changed the romance genre for me, set the bar too high, and I can't tell whether I should love or hate it for that. I'd go as far as to say this fic isn't really about romance, either; it's been every kind of relationship there is under the sun. It's about death, it's about hope, it's about tragedy, addiction, failures, and family. It's everything. I love, love the idea of the soul separating itself from the body being used as a symbol of a person at the ultimate crossroads: Should I live, or should I die? And death giving that person a second chance to make their final decision. I love this fic. Everyone and their mom needs to read it because it's truly life changing. I cried three times reading this. THREE. Not a single word is wasted here.

Here are the rest of the seven. These are all fics I enjoyed immensely and love dearly:

Running on Air by eleventy7 -> Harry Potter | 74,880 words | 17 chapters ->Teen and Up | Completed -> Summary: Draco Malfoy has been missing for three years. Harry is assigned the cold case and finds himself slowly falling in love with the memories he collects. -> Thoughts: Genuinely, this fic ALMOST made joined the other three in my favorites. The only reason it didn't is because it didn't leave the same impact that the others did. But the writing, the plot, the romance, the characterizations, are all amazing, and the fact that it could've been a fourth edition to my favorites without the additional impact should be a testament to how good everything else is. I love a good investigation fic where I have no idea what's going on, but eager to learn more. I love the way they handled Ginny and Harry's relationship, how they were both never really good for each other as lovers, but humanizing them both. Ginny isn't a villain in the way of the gay relationship (I hate that trope, as we all do). Harry was just as bad in their relationship. And there are just so many good quotes, and every time I'm in the car for too long, staring at the road, I think to myself, "What if I just kept driving? What if I didn't go where I needed to go, but instead left everything behind and kept going?" And I really think this fic is in part to blame for that. Phenomenal work.

Oyasumi by monozayn -> Identity V | 6,210 words | 1 chapter -> Mature | Completed -> Summary: Oyasumi, Oyasumi Close your eyes and you'll leave this dream. . . . Eli Clark was something. But at the end of the day, Eli Clark wasn’t Naib’s something. A short story about giving too little, too late -> Thoughts: I had a VISCERAL reaction to this fic when I read two and a half years ago. I think I can contribute most of my feelings to the fact that I myself wasn't in the best mental state at the time, so it just hurt more than it should've. I think if I were to read this today, it wouldn't make it onto this list at all, but because of the strong memories I have tied to it, it's keeping its place here. I do remember really liking the characterization of Naib, who, despite being the MC, is entirely blameless and often really comes off as creepy, especially in the beginning. It was really interesting.

Food for the Heart by SharkbaitSekki -> Haikyuu | 28,486 words | 1 chapter -> Teen and Up | Completed | Locked Work ->Summary: Enter Oikawa Tooru, the middle-class citizen who has everything he needs, but who does not eat. Enter Iwaizumi Hajime, the homeless young man who barely scrapes enough to eat every single day. One chance encounter is all they need to start turning things around. That is, if they actually do want to bring change to their comfortable, destructive routines. -> Thoughts: If I'm gonna be honest, this fic is kinda like a fever dream to me. It's actually the only fic on this list that I've read twice, that being I really don't reread or rewatch media in general outside of gently skimming or rewatching certain episodes/scenes. I always lose this fic, and it came as a surprise to me to see that it was written by the same person that wrote Come Morning Light because I did NOT know this until I found it again for this fic. Thrice I have found this fic and thrice did it escape my attention. Now about the actual fic and not the mythical legend that it truly is, it's just such an interesting take on the characters. Less so that it's a perfect characterization but a wonderful insight to homelessness and privilege, into complex relationships and eating disorders. It shows that all people are different, they can be selfish when trying not to be, that life sometimes just really rocks our shit. I've struggled in on and off periods with eating myself, so this fic really drives home a nail into face that it might not for other people.

the path to paradise by roadtripwithlucifer -> Bungou Stray Dogs | (currently) 73,250 words | (currently) 11 chapters -> Explicit | Work in Progress -> Summary:

To think that there’s a gifted in this world who can transport others to a ‘Hell.’ Not even a particularly hellish hell. For all Akutagawa had experienced in his life, this is obnoxiously tame. Pleasant, even, if he was to ignore the centaurs hunting him for sport and the fact that he’s kneeling in an open grave.Still - if Akutagawa was given such an ability, he’d have no shortage of significantly more creative punishments for creatures as loathsome as himself.

Akutagawa goes to Hell. Atsushi follows. Neither return the same. -> Thoughts: This is one that is being updated quite regularly, so I have complete faith it will be saw through to the end (as the author has seen their other longfics to the end, too). This has some of the best BSD characterizations I've ever seen, especially Akutagawa. This fic scratches a very specific itch, since it's literally a Dante's Inferno AU, and where else are you gonna find one? One that's actually well-written, no less? It satisfies my constant hunger for tragic, painful things to happen to my favorite characters without ending poorly. They find comfort in each other. I love that. I love this fic. I can't wait to see how it ends. I like the use of their Dante and Virgil as "OC's", too. I don't mind OC's in most fics, but this is one the first to truly make me like their OC's. The author also puts in a whole lot of research, and they use this cool system of endnotes (that I WILL be stealing for any future long-form projects) to express their research. I just love reading their thoughts, and you can clearly see how much passion there is here.

Tommyinnit's unbeatable method of avoiding sudden death by eneliii -> Dream SMP | 79,922 words | 30 chapters -> Teen and Up | Completed -> Summary: “I uh,” Tommy starts, not knowing how to break this to the hero lightly. He hates to be the bearer of bad news. “I think your powers are broken? It’s not a bad thing of course, but like, I swear you tried to mind control me and it like, totally failed. Which is fine, honestly, don’t feel insecure. Everyone’s power stop working sometimes… I think.”  Sheesh, this is very awkward. Why is no one else talking? Why is Philza looking at him like he grew three heads? Why is the Blade staring at him so intensely? Why is Willow still frozen? “Did I, did I hit a nerve? Yikes,” Tommy hisses, “Well um,” He steps back, bracing his legs and bending his knees, “This was like super fun, but I’m - I’mma head out.” or, in which Tommy manages to annoy the hell out of Phil, Techno and Wilbur by being both impossible to catch and irritatingly endearing. or or, a crack fic where Tommy is a vigilante and Phil, Techno and Wilbur are the heroes hunting him down. -> Thoughts: I read this fic while it was coming out. I was also in therapy, so imagine my surprise and utter devastation when those chapters started coming out (if you know, you know), because I was, indeed, reading it to make myself feel better and not be sad all the time. I haven't read it in a hot minute, so I'm not sure if the humor would match up to mine today of if it would just be really cringe but I remember always finding it very funny. If it had just been funny and random, it may not have made it on here, but the overarching plot makes it a work of art. I won't spoil, because I do think you should read it, but it's a very good plot twist that I didn't see coming because I hadn't read any of the other works. Everything in that fic has a meaning, and everything is beautiful, and everything hurts. The concept itself is something that I think about often, too, even before I'd read it. Great execution.

Spiderwebs and Secrets by fi_niamh -> Genshin Impact | (currently) 89,103 words | (currently) 14 chapters -> Teen and Up | Work in Progress -> Summary:

Albedo, usually one for blunt and quick actions, was struggling to determine how he should continue. On one hand, marking the death as suicide, as it very much appeared to be, would immediately close the case and give the bereaved family some much needed closure. But could Albedo really do that when so many things didn't line up? Sitting back in his chair Albedo let out a deep breath. He scanned down the page reading the provided boxes. ... He was really going to do this wasn't he? Picking up quill with a steady hand, Albedo marked the fourth and final box with a neat cross mark. Death under suspicious circumstances. Albedo stood, waiting for the ink to dry before gently picking the piece of paper up. Albedo had a new assignment. As head of the Knights of Favonius Investigation Unit, Albedo was not going to let the cause of Diluc Ragnvindr's death go unknown.

When Diluc is reported dead as what appears to be a suicide, Jean struggles to keep it together, Kaeya is left in shambles, and Albedo begins to uncover the web of secrets and lies that Diluc left behind. -> Thoughts: While this fic hasn't been updated in a long time (and admittedly I haven't even caught up to the latest chapters, but that's not because the updates were bad, I just have this mental block that occurs with every multi-chaptered fic I read that I always have a really hard time breaking through). Anyway, this fic has the best characterization I have ever seen of any of the title characters: Kaeya, Diluc, Albedo, and Jean. It hurts so bad and so good, and I love me a well-written investigation fic that keeps me on my toes. So, so good. Did I mention that this hurts? Because it hurts. Hurts like a knife digging into your stomach and being twisted, but you keep pushing it in because the pain is addicting.

Butterflies and Storms by Chalily -> Bungou Stray Dogs | 36,524 words | 14 chapters -> Teen and Up | Completed -> Summary: “That girl in the back! She’s getting away!” Chuuya whipped around to see that his men were right — one of their assailants was an ability user, and she was using her power to escape. Shit. Mori had been painfully clear when he’d assigned this mission. He expected no survivors. Chuuya dropped his ability’s hold on the six or seven people around him, then kicked off of a nearby wall to propel himself at the girl. She was slowly dissipating into light, vanishing upwards into the ceiling, but before the edge of her coat could vanish Chuuya shot by like a dark bullet, reached out, and just barely grabbed it. // Chuuya gets transported to the past! Watch him struggle to figure out what the hell’s happening, then enlist the help of a young Oda to get back. But with the past altered, will he return to the same future he left behind? -> Thoughts: This fic has the perfect blend of good plot, characterization, and humor. Mainly the humor part, because it's always so effortless and it astounds me how easily they were able to write it. It's so natural, and I only wish I was half as funny as they are. This fic also reminds a lot of BEAST, and I am under the personal opinion that BEAST is better than the actual manga. Because it is and I'm correct. The OC they used for this and her ability is actually a book I'd read before, so that was also an added bonus for me. Very, very enjoyable fic and criminally underrated.

Honorable Mention: I KNOW you said only 10, but I have to mention this one fic that I can't for the love of me find, but I think about nearly every time I'm writing. It's a Dream SMP one-shot. If I remember correctly, it was somewhere between 1-3k words, and it was an absolutely masterpiece. I would've booted one of the fics I have listed to fit this one, but alas, I cannot find the fic. It's about the SBI, but all of the brothers get drafted to World War I or II, I can't remember, leaving Phil alone in their shared house. It's so. Good. Whenever I write, I try to emulate the emotion that author put into their fic, the way they were able to convey the lived-in, homely feel of the family as each one of them were ripped away, as they died. They described things in such a simplistic manner, and instead of focusing on faces or words, they talked about how the knob to the cabinet door was broken, the scratch marks on the table, the squeaky tiles on the floor. Amazing. I wish I could find it again.

Again, thank you so much for asking me!!!

[starburstdragon]

Bouncing off the Nimona stuff, I’d love to hear your take on disability in FMA

I think FMA is a story about recovery, first and foremost. Not just from injuries but from other traumatic events too. It’s loaded with characters who are disabled and scarred and mentally ill in a way that most other stories just aren’t.

And these characters recover in different ways too! And to different degrees! And even when someone magically regains a limb or their entire body or whatever, that’s not the end of their recovery.

Ed’s automail prosthetics are also really well written I think. His regular ones are heavy as shit (possibly even stunting his growth) and he needs to work out so that he’s strong enough to use them and account for that extra weight while he does. He needs to get new ones in a different material when he goes somewhere cold so he doesn’t get frostbite. He has to maintain them or they break. They’re expensive, prohibitively so if he didn’t have military money and a bestie whos probably giving him a discount. And at several points when they’re getting repaired we see him using prosthetics that someone might use in real life!

(The manga also includes him having phantom pains from his lost limbs.)

That’s just the main character, and already we can see how Arakawa has researched how this sort of thing works and how it impacts Ed’s life (both the advantages he gets and the inconveniences he has to keep in mind).

And Ed’s far from the only character. Al’s lost his entire body. He lacks so much of his physical sensation. I’m not really qualified to speak on that (it’s rather the opposite of my problem) but I do think it’s presented in a really sensitive and poignant way. Izumi lost several organs and is chronically ill (and I think she has chronic pain specifically? It’s been a bit since I’ve done FMA things lol) and she gets physically blowback when she overworks herself. Hawkeye has scars covering her back and is (as I recall) the superior officer that Ed and Al respect and look up to the most.

Even Scar, who initially seems to be a shoe-in for all the negative tropes that bug me so much, is written sensitively and sympathetically! Honestly once we get the backstory on Ishval I’d say he’s one of the most unconditionally heroic characters in the whole story.

(Also Ling definitely has completely fucked blood sugar levels and he’s pretty cool I think. I’m not really qualified to speak on the whole GreedLing situation though you’d have to ask someone else about that.)

A lot of the characters are also majorly traumatized. Most of the military characters Ed interacts with are reckoning with the horrible things they did during the Ishvalan extermination, for example, and the narrative is sensitive to their pain even as it calls out their mistakes. The librarian (I forgot her name because again I haven’t fulled my metal alchemists in a while) reads as autistic to me and she’s absolutely crucial in salvaging the ruined library.

I haven’t seen Nimona yet, so I can’t really talk about Ballister to compare him to any of that. I might come back to this post later if I do wind up watching it. My best point of reference for Stevenson’s writing of disabilities otherwise is SPOP, but I don’t really want to directly compare anything in SPOP to FMA, either, because… there really isn’t any way to compare them? I can and have talked about this at length in the past (that video predates Stevenson making his name/gender properly known but he had discussed a bit of his feelings on the subject so it mentions his old name and uses neutral pronouns) but it feels more than a little unfair to talk about in this post just because of how much the two stories are in different ballparks wrt their disabled characters. But to make a long story short, SPOP’s protagonists aren’t physically scarred or disabled, even when it would make sense for them to be (Hordak and Spinnerella do both have physical disabilities, just ones that are never shown or mentioned when they’re not opponents, which is… eugh) and the narrative treatment of Entrapta and Scorpia is genuinely insulting to me personally.

In the end I guess it just boils down to… FMA was written by someone who expected disabled people to be part of her audience, and who researched and wrote accordingly. Nimona, despite my interest in it, was helmed by someone who previously has not seemed to have that same expectation for his works.

[asksds]

Part 1 | Next

Previous events

((This page was pretty much exclusively asset-flipping from the Clip Studio Asset Store. Materials used: City | Sky | Rain, the latter two get regular use across the entire thing.))

((MOM HOLY FUCK it's finally here!! I'll ramble a bit about it under a Readmore - but this one is 17 pages so more than 2 weeks of updates to look forward to! Yay! Return back to regular asks is nearing!))

((This really was such a particular roadblock for me and I think I have pinpointed 2 big reasons as to why it took THIS long:

I'd been thinking about it and layouting it in my head previously for years pretty much, and if you're an artist you know that overblown expectations like that can rarely be met by reality. Not getting to execute it like I imagined was a little frustrating so that made it harder to work on it

Turns out I was just helplessly overworked/kinda burned out from my job lol. The only time I could really get down to work on this was when I had any longer vacation, and we had a gigantic project at work spanning like 2-3 years that really went into overdrive last year with me pulling 10-hour-days for months basically. That left me no time and energy to really do anything else in the evening, and I'm pretty sure that impacted me until now since I could only finish this entire thing when I had another vacation and finally like...felt relaxed enough to draw?? and have fun doing it?? and have IDEAS?? It felt like I hadn't had ideas or motivation in years so that was a nice surprise, but also abolish jobs man I just wanna draw OCs and their shenanigans...

I'm really glad it's done, it did contribute to my posting anxiety to be honest where I felt bad posting anything because in my head I was like :( People will get mad if I do something else instead of work on this (ridiculous but you know how brains get. Like mate I drew a bunch of things for con prep and got too guilty to post any of it aaah) + for dramatic effect I didn't want to spam too many other asks inbetween which is why that grinded to a halt. Either way, it's done, it might not be perfect, it might show that it has spanned a very long time via some style changes between panels but what matters is that it's finished and I'm happy with it! If you read this (kudos) hope you enjoy, hope you have a great day and upcoming week, stay safe and hydrated in this hellweather, and remember the joy of creation because it's what makes life worth living!!))

[cmrosens]

Worldbuilding a Hellscape: Workshop

My most popular posts here seem to be my worldbuilding ones, so I thought I should let people know that I'm opening an online conference marking 200 years since the publication of James Hogg's Confessions of a Justified Sinner, with a creative writing "Building a Hellscape" workshop as a way of engaging with theology in SFF.

My workshop kicks off 09:30AM UK TIME - if you can't make that, it should be recorded so you should get the whole pack of recordings in your conference pack, post-conference when they are all uploaded and accessible.

It's a paid gig for me but as Romancing the Gothic is a project run entirely by one, very overworked person, and exists solely on donations, I've waived the fee.

I'll be getting you to think about some aspects of what a hellscape could be in a SFF context, using prompts like the ones I've posted here, and seeing what people come up with in the hour we have to dig in!

ABOUT THE CONFERENCE: Romancing the Gothic presents its fourth annual online conference over two days - 24th and 25th August. The conference celebrates 200 years of James Hogg's Private Memoirs and Confessions of a Justified Sinner with a series of talks, events and workshops.

The conference is designed to cover different time zones so the days are long. People are recommended to come for as long as they want. The talks and sessions are recorded so that you don't miss anything even if you can't be there in person for specific times/sessions.

Early Bird Tickets, Concessions and Free Tickets

There will be early bird discounts on tickets until 24th June 2024.

Concession tickets are for students, the unwaged, retired people or anyone whose economic situation makes it necessary.

You can donate a ticket for those who are unable to afford to come.

You can donate directly to a person you know providing their name and email, or, for a random donation to help someone attend, enter the name "Sam Hirst" or "AN Other" in the name fields and email the donation ticket to sam[at]romancingthegothic[dot]com to help cover the cost of a free space for someone who needs one. 

(We offer a limited number of free tickets for those who cannot pay the ticket price, please email sam[at]romancingthegothic[dot]com for more information.)

Accessibility

We have live auto-generated captions. We provide slides and, where possible, scripts before the conference with alt-text for images. We have regular breaks and encourage people to take part in ways that are most comfortable for them. There is no forced participation.

If you have any accessibility needs, please get in touch at sam@romancingthegothic.com and I will do my best to make sure these accommodations are provided.

Book your ticket below:

PROGRAMME

(All times are UK time, BST. Please check your local timezone so you don't miss you chosen events)

Saturday 24th August

9am - Greetings and conference set up

9.30 - 10.30 - Writing Workshop with author CM Rosens - 'Create a Hellscape: Using Theology in World-Building'

10.30 - 10.45 - BREAK

10.45 - 12.30 - Panel 1 - James Hogg: Work and Legacy

Nick Smith - I have since been induced to look to you as my guardian angel': Hogg's Highland Journeys and their influence on the Jusfitied Sinner

Mizuki Tsutsui - An analysis of Ian Rankin and James Mavor's draft of the film script of James Hogg'sJustified Sinner:Demon, Union and Adaptation

Martina Jauch - Masculinities, Mania, and Modes of Religion - ETA Hoffman's and Goethe's impact on James Hogg's The Private Memoirs and Confessions of a Justified Sinner

Laila Sougri - The parallax of Evil: Phenomenological Encounters with the Uncanny in the Works of James Hogg, Daphne du Maurier, and Mark Z. Danielewski

12.30 - 13.00 - BREAK

13.00 - 14.00 - Cooking Workshop and lunch with Allie Pino (co-author of The Gothic Cookbook) - 'Whistle While You Cook: Arepa-Making and Venezuelan Demonic Folklore with 'El Silbón' and the 'Dancing Devils of Yare'

14.00 - 14.15 - BREAK

14.15 - 15.45 - Panel 2 - Demonic Politics

Javier Mosqueda - Building the devil: indigenous and Christian elements in Jeronimo de Mendieta's concept of the demon

Jarrod DePrado - “A God is Not So Glorious As a King”: Religion as a Demonic Political Tool on Stage

Jan Marvin A. Goh - "holy mysteries/by the eyes of the dead': Exploring the Gothic in Divine Concept in Nick Joaquin's The Mass of St. Sylvester

Amy Coles - She has to be hammered into shape: Religion-Related Abuse and Female Suppression in Ray Russell's The Case Against Satan

15.45 - 16.00 - BREAK

16.00 - 17.45 - Women and the Demonic

Maria Belén Caparrós - ‘I’m not going to kill you. I’ m going to sacrifice you’: Patriarchal Spectrality, expressive violence and structural demons in Argentinian Contemporary Representation of Femicide

Vale McComb - WhatPuppet History didn't tell you: Examing a Trio of 17th cent. Possession Cases and What Happened Thereafter

Brenda Tolian - Down Into the Darkness of Anne Bannerman’s “Prologue”

Pauline Suwanban - Contemporary Devil Romances and Female Confidence (2020-2024)

17.45 - 18.00 - BREAK

18.00 - 19.00 - First Keynote - Adam Kotsko - 'Faust in the Anthropocene'

19.00 - 19.15 - Author Roundtable - The Modern Scottish Gothic

Anna Cheung, Helen Grant and further authors TBC

20.15 - 20.30 - BREAK

20.30 - 21.30 - Cocktail/Mocktail hours

SUNDAY 25th August

9.15 - Greeting

9.30 - 10.30 - Second Keynote - Martha McGill - "Evil Company": Internal and External Demons in Early Modern Scotland

10.30 - 10.45 - BREAK

10.45 - 12.15 - Panel 4 - Demons, Duality and Doubles

Gina Lyle - Literary Hauntings in Helen McClory's Bitterhall

Rowan McMonagle - 'Thrawn Janet'

Miranda Larsen - This is a merger, not a possession: Kurama's Complex Morality in Yu Yu Hakusho

12.15 - 13.00 - LUNCH BREAK

13.00 - 14.45 - Panel 5 - The Modern Demonic Imagination

Abhishek Sarkar - Religious Obsession and Murderous Zeal: The Fanaticism of the Serial Killer in Four Indian Films

Efram Sera-Shriar - From Demon World Village to Ghosts 'n Goblins: Popular Occulture, Videogame Censorship, and Satanic Panic in the 1980s

Máireéad Casey - Demon Possession, Sexual Grooming, and Resistance in We’re All Going to the World’s Fair (2021)

Kyria Van Gasse - I see his face but he's not me: the mental and emotional effect of playing the demonic and the monstrous in Live Action Role Play

14.45 - 15.00 - BREAK

15.00 - 16.45 - Panel 6 - Vampires and the Demonic

Mary Going - I Will not Lie Below: Demons, Vampires, and Contemporary Iterations of Lilith

Madhuchhanda Ray - At the Crossroads of the Hindu Demon and the Western Undead: Reading Satyajit Ray’s Quirky Vampire

Anca Simina Martin - The first Romanian Vampire Novel: The Case of the Vampire-priest Antagonist

Hayley Smith - Welcome to God's Army: Religion and Religious Extremism in Netflix's Midnight Mass

16.45 - 17.00 - BREAK

17.00 - 18.30 - Writing Workshop - Samantha Miles - Playwriting as Ritual: Summoning Demons and Constructing Hellscapes

18.30 - 19.00 - BREAK

19.00 - 20.45 - Panel 7 - Imagining Hell

Susan Vanderborg - "Hell is only a word": The Imperfect Demonic Translations of Event Horizon

Ruth-Anne Walbank - This deep hell of ills: Hellscapes and the Gothic in Lancashire Cotton Famine Poetry (1861-5)

Morgan Daimler - Tenants of Hell: Fairies, the Devil, and Folk Belief in Early Modern Scotland

Rebecca Marks - Blotting and Blurring Demons: Blake's Last Judgement

20.45 - 21.00 - FINAL REMARKS

As always, there is a code of conduct for our events. Please find it here. https://romancingthegothic.com/code-of-conduct/

TICKET PRICES

Early Bird Discount available now until 24th June 2024: £17.50 Full Price ticket after 24 July 2024: £25.00 (INCLUDES BOTH DAYS)

Concession for students, retired or unwaged Early Bird Discount available now until 24th June 2024: £10.00 (INCLUDES BOTH DAYS) Concession ticket for students, retired or unwaged: £15.00 (INCLUDES BOTH DAYS)

Donate a Ticket: £15.00 (for anyone at any time! to donate one, this price stays the same) (INCLUDES BOTH DAYS)

[nothorses]

How can I advocate for disabled students to get a better education than I did, as someone who doesn't plan to going into education professionally or having kids? I've had experiences ranging from amazing to miserable in public school, special ed, and private parochial schools alike. One of the main problems in all of those schools was how little I was listened to as a kid when I knew what my needs were. I've looked back at my IEPs (which were rarely followed) and the majority of it was common sense bodily autonomy stuff that I take for granted as an adult. When I look up materials on special education and advocacy it's all directed at parents who don't necessarily have the time or energy or their children's best interest in mind. I'd love to read more on special education theory and best practices as well as learning what sort of regulatory bodies there even are for special education programs.

This is for sure not my area of expertise, but:

I would say that "special education" is going to often be a lot less fruitful than you want it to be. My experience with- and what I have heard from others about- SpEd is that professionals in the field tend to be abled/neurotypical people who have... a certain kind of mindset when it comes to disabled students that you are probably already familiar with.

The class I took on SpEd for undergrad was specifically oriented around the legal requirements for accommodation, and the class itself was set up to be more hostile to disabled students than any of my regular education classes were (one of the other students emailed the prof about it & got her to change her late work policy for that reason, too).

If you want to read into theory, I would really suggest you look into "disability studies" rather than special ed specifically. That tends to be oriented more towards disability justice, and centers disabled voices, a lot more than SpEd- which is often more about how abled teachers "deal with" disabled students. Disability Studies will also very often engage in education specifically, but even outside of that, the theory is pretty relevant.

And if you just want some stuff to read ASAP, I def invite you to search "disability" in my ed library folder, and just look at whatever pops out to you!

As far as more concrete action goes, I'll be honest in that I do not know a lot of ways to interact with education from outside the system. What does come to mind for me is:

Look into, and keep tabs on, legislation regarding disabled students and education more broadly. I don't know where you're at, but from a US perspective: city, county, state, and even federal- but you will likely have more of an impact on a smaller scale.

Figure out if meetings are happening, or if comments are being taken, and get people you know to do those with you if you can.

Call relevant representatives & let them know how you want them to vote. Pretend you're one of their voters already, even if you're not.

Look into local schools and districts; they may have ways to get involved listed on their websites, and they may also have events/meetings/conferences that you can attend and make yourself heard at. Bring people to those, too! (The school I student-taught at has had changes shot down bc people- not even parents of students there- showed up at meetings to vote against them).

Talk to people! Make connections, form relationships, etc.- bring these things into conversation with them. Even if they aren't people who have a direct impact on decisions being made, you can influence the culture of your community & potentially make a much broader, much longer-lasting change than a single vote would make.

I would love more ideas in the notes of this post, if anyone has any!

[wine4thewin]

Any tips for writing smut/romance? Because yours is delicious!

Thank you ☺️

Well, I’d say it’s a long process of trial and error within finding your voice in writing. I’ve been at it for probably 20-ish years and when I first wrote smut maybe a decade ago…it was soooooo bad 🤣 even to this day I will post something with a scene and feel extremely insecure! I’m like, oh God, was it bad!? 😅

Take all of this with a grain of salt. What I feel strongly about, other people may not feel the same. The writing process is different for everyone.

It also depends on your goal. Just regular p*rny smut or thought-out erotica?

1. Emotional Payoff: I find myself writing giant slow burns more than anything these days. Why? Because I want the cumulation of events to feel impactful to the reader. I don’t even mean “oh, the characters have fallen in love” emotional payoff. Sometimes, they aren’t in love. Sometimes, they are struggling with feelings, with beliefs, with conflicts…and I want the first erotic scene to be impactful to the plot, not just ‘thrown in for the hell of it’. It must add to the story and I want it to be a turning point or realization of sorts for the characters…for better or worse. Can this be done without a slow burn? Yes. But it takes a very precise prose to do it in a short piece.

Essentially, beyond my long-windedness, I am saying the smut should mean something to the story to be emotionally impactful to the reader, even if the act is meaningless to the characters themselves at that time. That is the difference IMO between erotica and flat, emotionless p#rny writing.

More below the cut - 18+ for some scenarios mentioned, but nothing crazy or offensive.

2. Sometimes Less Crude is More Sexy: This depends on your goal. Are you aiming for just how many dirty words you can cram in a paragraph? Seems a bit wild, but sometimes certain words can make a smut scene more impactful. I used to write every single gory detail with blunt, crude words. Did it work? Sure. Was it the sort of writing that made people feel a flutter or emotional response aside from ‘ooo dirty smut’? Maybe not.

Back to emotion. Emotional words can take your smut to the next level. You could say your male character ‘grabbed her thighs and spread them quickly, his huge *insert crude word* hard and ready to stuff her dripping *insert crude word*’.

Or, you could say instead, ‘the calloused tips of his fingers ghosted across her skin, making her shiver with anticipation. The tremble in his touch betrayed his inexperience, even as he moved slowly between her thighs. She could feel that he was eager for her, pressed as he was against her own desire…and she would take all he had to offer and more.

There would be no going back from this.

“Am I what you want?” His voice was an utterance across her lips, gaze dark and questioning. Pupils wide, consuming her.

There was no need to answer aloud. She shifted her hips and took him for herself.’

The above is me setting the stage for the act itself, all while putting in words and sentences that reveal small emotions, details, insecurities, dominance, and desires. Idk, you tell me, I just made that whole scene up on the spot 😂

When you read something that makes you react, remind yourself of the words the writer used that made you feel. Was it because they pulled you into the scene, had you feel with the character you love? Or was it because they said dripping vajayjay twenty times? Different strokes for different folks!

3. Don’t Be Repetitive: Refer to genitalia in different ways, but don’t be obnoxiously flowery like the harlequin novels of old and their “his staff of love quivered in her touch” sorta thing. More like, “his desire was velvet covered steel under her grasp / his firm length” or “she was swollen against his fingertips, ready, glistening with arousal”. You can get away with saying d#ck a few times, but it gets annoying and eye-rolling if it’s every sentence. You can check out this list for ideas!

4. Use Location/Situation to Your Advantage: where are these characters? Semi-public? In private? Are they forbidden being together? Or is their love considered illegal or shameful in your fantasy/sci-fi country? Bring feelings of ‘could we be caught, excitement, the thrill, shame, struggling with own beliefs, reluctance yes, even reluctance’ into the smut to amp up the stakes.

5. Not All Sex is Perfect: hey, we don’t always get it right the first time. I’ve written one character having the time of his life from his POV, only to find out his partner didn’t exactly find him as awe-inspiring 🤣 but, his partner gave him another chance, what a saint jk jk, and the emotional aspect of this previously very selfish character realizing he feels strongly about pleasing someone other than himself for the first time ever was a huge plot point with the smut.

Don’t be afraid of awkward sex, reassuring sex, figuring things out together sex…they can always get it right the next time!

6. If You Write a Kink, Go Deep: size kink, BDSM, A/B/O, etc. if you are going to do it, really commit to it. Don’t mention it vaguely, because if people are looking for that in your smut because you tagged it as such, don’t leave them hanging! I had to study BDSM terms, read blogs of those in the life and their experiences to even come close to writing authentically about it (and I mean stuff beyond generic spanking, such as the risks of edgeplay, knife play, wax play, sensory deprivation, subspace, etc).

Closing thoughts before I ramble you into the abyss from whence you won’t return:

Overall, writing is to have fun! Don’t be hard on yourself, it’s always a learning process. Ask for feedback on your smut, observe what you like about your favorite authors, practice practice practice.

Much of my advice may be considered advanced (or maybe it’s all shit LOL) but I hope some of it helps bring food for thought and helps others on their ever-continuing journey of creative writing!