#i want my heroes to be competent

[phoenixkaptain]

I have to be honest. As much as I love making fun of Bruce and Tim, I think that they’re more talented than fanon makes them out to be.

Like, the point of Batman as a character is that he’s unrealistic. It would be a very boring story if they made it realistic. Yeah, realistically, he’s not prepared for everything, but this isn’t realistic! This is a silly comic series about a man who has sent a box of live bats to another human being more than once!

I want that unrealism! I want Bruce to be able to get out impossible situations because he saw them coming! I want his convoluted, dumbass plans to work flawlessly! I want his plan to “fail” only for him to wink at the camera, revealing that failing was also in the plan!!

Batman is such a comforting character! I’m always “How’s he gonna get outta this one” instead of “Can he get outta this one” and it’s very nice!

He’s lame, he’s cringe, he’s the worst, he’s the dumbest man alive, but Bruce Wayne is never surprised and that brings me a great amount of comfort and joy.

Tim is the same way. I don’t want to think about a realistic fifteen-year-old being Robin, I want to think about the unrealistic ability Tim has to be completely unnoticed even by those with super-hearing. I want Tim to inexplicably think of every possibility and have a million contingencies, and while Tim does get surprised, he’s the most adaptable person on the planet, he can remake his plan in milliseconds!

I don’t want to think about Tim or Bruce failing or whatever. I want Tim and Bruce to inexplicably be all-knowing. Batman has managed to beat up Superman more than once, Robin xan inexplicably punch like a bullet through fucking water, and they both are billionaires with souls, do you really think I’m reading these comics for realism?

[sleepy-grav3]

DC x DP Prompt/Idea

Amity Park has always been haunted; everyone knows this but didn't care as long as it didn't disturb their lives. However, they didn't realize that they made up a third of the beings haunting it.

From the moving trees to the animals with blackholes for pupils. Amitians didn't care if the clouds moved and made themselves into shapes in a way that didn't seem natural, or that the streets always looked so odd or changed as they walked about.

They ignored the mushroom rings at the park, it's not like their dogs were interested in them and joggers tend to stick to the sidewalks. They ignored the people who looked familiar but just a bit off, like their too long arms, their claw or talon-like nails, the lack of facial features, their sharp teeth, and too wide smiles.

The humming and singing at night, the dancing ladies around town, the fog that had a figure just behind it- It wasn't their problem.

Until Wes moved into town and almost Immediately got out and called the Justice League.

At least he waited for Phantom to get to the point of burning out?

[yuwuta]

PLS PLS PLSSSSS keep talking about kids with olympic athletes! gojo and nanami pls pls pls i have to Know. everything u wrote about yuuta was already so so cute

(prev olympics au here)

the gojo twins are hilarious because your baby boy looks exactly like satoru, but has very little of his personality—it seems like the only things he inherited was satoru’s love for sweets and love for you. still, even though he’s a strong swimmer, he much prefers to relax in his floaties alongside you if you’re also in the pool, or chill by your side on a lounge chair, glasses too big for his face keeping the sun out of his eyes as he shares his smoothie with you, and asks to borrow your phone to take pictures of his sister and daddy in the pool. 

your baby girl on the other hand… she might have your face but she’s got satoru’s everything else—his competitive streak, his confidence, and definitely his mischievous nature. she’s the one who tiptoes into your bedroom at five in the morning, tapping at her daddy’s shoulders, and putting her little finger over his lip to shush him before he can wake you up; she’s always the one to convince satoru to take her swimming the backyard at the crack of dawn, and why by the time you and your baby boy wake up, she and satoru are already past warm up laps and swimming lessons and onto who can make the splashiest canonball competitions (she always wins because while her tiny body can endure a belly flop, satoru’s years of training physically doesn’t allow him to do it… and maybe because he’s not so competitive when it comes to his baby girl, he’ll always let her win). 

kento’s professional judo career honestly doesn’t last very long. after his first olympic games, you two start dating and he proposes just after he wins gold the second time he’s in the olympics; he does maybe two more years of national competitions while you’re pregnant, and decides that the intense training for the next two years in preparation of a third olympic competition isn’t worth missing time he could spend with you or your baby girl—plus, with all the money he’s made from competitions, winning gold medals, brand ambassadorships, commercials, and collaborations, he had enough money to provide for all of your for the rest of your lives. so, that’s what he does (his dream has always been to be a househusband, anyway...) his previous salaryman career comes in handy when deciding how to invest his money, how to buy a house, how to take care of his friends, how to set up a fund for your daughter, and an extra account or two… just incase more babies come along… 

by the time your baby girl is four, she’s already kento’s biggest fan. she loudly and proudly proclaims to everybody that her daddy was basically superman and won all the shiny trophies and medals in the house from when he was being a superhero. if anyone recognizes kento when they’re out together, she always confirms their suspicions, proudly boasting, “yeah kento is my daddy! he’s a winner!” it always makes kento’s heart swell to hear her praise. he doesn’t compete professionally anymore, but he does train from time to time, and has taken on a few mentees, and your daughter LOVES to watch him coach/train. she’s got her own uniform that she always puts on whenever they go to the gym together, and gets so excited when kento or ino or yuuji pretend to spar with her. 

she’s honestly kento’s mini figure. she’s respectful and reserved, but strong and knows when to fight and how to use her voice. there’s a time when he gets a call from her school saying that she got in a fight, the principal frames it as your daughter needlessly pushing around an older kid, but your daughter is certain in her words when she tells her dad that it was because the kid was being mean to the younger kids, and to her. kento doesn’t say a word to the teachers—doesn’t even fight them sending her home early for the day, because he’s happy to scoop her up and take her out for ice cream and tell her that he’s proud of her.

[langernameohnebedeutung]

.

[flying-cat]

okay guys i wish they were in the same agency too and the way they parted is definitely disappointing but the "i didn't even get a thank you" and "i devoted eight years of my life to him and this is what i get" and "i expected him to join" shit from bkg's pov i've seen is kinda cringe y'all 😭 you're making him sound like a reddit nice guy. that man is not expecting izuku to do anything for him anymore.

[crimeronan]

my most irritating severance theory is that "gemma" was never real and that she's a carbon copy of dichen lachman's character in dollhouse, who was a tabula rasa woman living in a hole that could be programmed with different personalities to fuck rich clients. i'm like 99% sure this is what "exports" are -- it's lumen shipping pre-downloaded sexbots with custom human personalities out to people. and/or using those sexbots for the company's own manipulative agenda.

in keeping with this, the entire relationship and """death""" and subsequent soulshattering grief were all painstakingly manufactured by lumen to get mark scout to sever himself, because for some fucking reason, he's the only one who can complete project cold harbor, whatever the Fuck that is. (i have not been in any theory tags and do not have any ideas about what it is or why mark s is special. or even IF he's special.)

then once mark finds out that gemma isn't real, his feelings for and about her will vanish in an uncomplicated puff of smoke. he will become miraculously free to continue his deeply fucked-up """love triangle""" with the helltwins without needing to answer any complicated questions about, like, the self, and his emotions, and his commitments, and polyamory.

(the helltwins don't count as complicated relationship dynamics because they are the same person, aside from not being the same person, and they hate each other, and also most importantly, mark absolutely Does Not Want to fuck one of them. hurrah!)

this theory irritates the fuck out of me bc i really do think i'm right about gemma. and this "twist," as a way to avoid any interesting themes, would be the laziest, most boring thing they could Possibly do.

i am on my fucking Knees praying to god that they KNOW this is the laziest, most boring thing they could possibly do. Please, God, If You Love Me. Please. Please Don't .

...

HOWEVER.

i WILL accept the lumon-engineered-a-sexbot-relationship-to-coerce-mark-into-severance plot, IF and ONLY if:

gemma is a person.

not like, gemma is a human being whose outie parents aren't actors. i mean, gemma is an artificial sexbot with a nonconsensually programmed personality, AND gemma is a fully sentient living breathing person. who wants her life back. who wants her AUTONOMY back. who is just now learning that she Literally Never Had Autonomy In The First Place.

we, as the audience, get to see her reckon with her identity. we're used to innies being the most oppressed class in the show, but gemma is something else entirely. even less than an innie. she is, legally and corporately, Nothing. she is an object built to serve lumon (and, upsettingly, mark!) without any sense of interiority or free will.

but here she is. having interiority and free will.

if the writers take the themes of personhood and "what is identity?" and "how do we define each other?" to their logical conclusion, by making gemma a non-person who Absolutely Fucking Is A Person....

and so we get to See Her be absolutely fucking MESSY and WRECKED and COMPLICATED, instead of always being the laughing dead wife or the gentle vapid servant....

if gemma Gets An Arc. if gemma makes Choices. if gemma has Motivations and Desires and Fuckups. if gemma gets to be centered in the narrative thematically, the same way the other innies are, if gemma gets to drive the story Herself instead of being the carrot on a stick for mark...

well. then the writers will have my heart. 5eva.

🙏🙏🙏

[javierduffy]

random sleep headcanon time let's go

when the boys aren't sleeping with Javi's head laying on Kieran's chest (yep, that was me!), they're spooning. Javier is the little spoon. Kieran will never admit it was almost entirely a bid to stop falling off the bed in the middle of the night (they both shift around a lot)

Kieran picked up a bit of Spanish while he was in the army, so when he and Javier are both a little bit sleep deprived and a bit more drunk they're giggling and gossiping about the rest of the gang

Javier is NOT a morning person and it's only when he gets older does he somewhat begin to tolerate them. if only to get more cuddle time with his hubby and see the sunrise splash across Kieran's face

Kieran is a bit of a blanket hog which is fine most of the time bc Javi runs warm and it's only in the winter that it becomes a problem because Javier hates the cold

(slaps roof of car) these bad boys can fit SO many nightmares in them. it's very rare they wake up thrashing and screaming tho. mostly their eyes shoot open and they tense up for a few moments, and many times one has woken up to the other staring at them, checking their pulse. bone-crushing cuddles and tea ensue.

(good ending/modern) have fun getting out of bed in the morning when your cats have found the exact locations and positions to make slipping out of bed impossible without waking someone up. Kieran spends about an extra 10 minutes in bed every morning trying to escape when Javier is wrapped around him, one cat is loafed on his chest, another one is curled up between his legs, and his arm has gone numb under the third. he wouldn't change a thing <3

FALLS TO MY KNEES YOURE SO RIGHT THESE ARE SO CUTE WAAAAHHHH 💔💔💔💔☹️☹️☹️☹️

personally i do believe that they swap back and forth on who’s the big spoon and who’s the little spoon but most of the time javier is indeed the little spoon. mostly because their height difference makes it the most comfortable but also because javi will prop his leg up on kieran like this in his sleep and sometimes it will make him wake up with terrible back pain so to avoid it, kieran gets big spoon privileges

also i think javier would really begin to enjoy being the little spoon after ch4 because while he can’t directly listen to kieran’s heartbeat, he can squeeze in tight and feel it on his back, and combining that with the warmth of kieran’s body and the heat of his breathing on his scalp, it’s just as comforting.

on the spanish note, i’ve been becoming more and more fond of the idea of kieran having a baseline understanding of spanish … at first i was leaning towards him not knowing a lick, just so javi can have language privacy for when he has his dramatic moments, but now it’s almost canon to me that kieran could at the very least navigate himself through a situation in which spanish is the only language the people around him could speak. though i think most of his gossip is going to be spanglish LOL which is even cuter to me 💔 (insert toby fox “toho project” accent changes) javier teaches him more and more words and they get more and more mean girl-y the more “privacy” they have in those conversations. they’re so cute 💔💔💔

“many times one has woken up to the other staring at them, checking their pulse” i have to d*e that makes me SO MISERAVLE BECAUSE YOURE RIGHT especially javier, not only because he’s almost explicitly lost kieran once, but also because he’s literally lived his entire life up until now dedicated to protecting the lives of those he loves (ie; fleeing to america to protect his family, not himself). so of course the first thing he’s going to do when he wakes up in fight or flight is to make sure the reason he is living is still alive. if kieran is still breathing, then javier is too. i can see javier curling up tight with his head on kieran’s chest, letting the rhythm of his heart ground him. kieran wakes up from nightmares cold and alone and he can’t see the world around him. he’ll gasp like he can’t breathe and sit up and pull his knees to his chest and, without fail, javier will reach out to his warmth and touch him- more often than not still in his sleep. it’s usually enough to snap kieran out of the flashback, at least to the point where he can grab javi’s hand and pull it up to his face, where he closes his eyes and treads his partners fingertips along his neck and cheeks to ensure to himself that he’s okay and safe. even if javier wakes up (which, as a man on the run, there’s no way he’d sleep through it), he’ll stay slack, watching kieran’s face slowly soften and his breathing slow enough that he won’t at least pass out. you’re entirely correct that following this, they hold each other tight, make sure they’re both warm as can be, and they’ll make/get some sort of tea or snack for the other. they don’t talk much, maybe a question here or there about a preference for the comfort but otherwise they just do things that remind the other that they’re both still alive enough to love.

THE LAST ONE OOUGGH YOUR EMAKING ME YHINK ABOUT ME AND JJ’S (rip jj my beloved (they’re not dead just inactive)) CENTURIES OLD MODERN JAVIERAN CAT SANCTUARY AU LOL in every life, javieran have cats. i don’t even think kieran can avoid attracting animals, and javier WILL cause a 10 car pileup on the highway if he sees a cat in need of rescuing. anyway, you’re completely right 😭💔 kieran always gets up first, even on the days that javier has work in the morning, so he’s the one who has to peel himself out of bed away from his fluffy, warm cell. he also has to try to shush two of the cats that begin their loud objections to his abhorrent behavior (of getting up to make coffee) so that they don’t wake javier up. he has to hush them all the way out of the room and into the kitchen, there in which the meowing becomes louder, as they’ve now become demands of compensation via food for waking them up so early. pepita, javier’s cat, always stays in bed with him until he wakes up, no matter what she is enticed with.

oh i love them im going to be sick thank you for sharing your thoughts with me they’re always so sweet 😭💔 u and i we’re the soft, fluffy javieran cavalry

[shinysteph]

Is this a safe space to say I liked the bnha epilogue and didn't see anything wrong with it? 🧍🏻‍♂️it was just a fun little bonus chapter I honestly don't know why people are upset about it

Anyway I love Shouto and I hope he enjoys his bowl and chopstick making classes

[wolfsbanesparks]

how do you think what personality billy would have in the "my adventures with superman" universe?

What a fun question!

So quick disclaimer: I've only seen the first couple episodes of My Adventures With Superman. I loved it but simply haven't had time to watch it all yet.

That being said, based on the vibes of the show I would think that if Billy were ever to show up in it he would be closer to his golden age self. I could totally see them making Billy parallel Clark a bit (a bit lonely, a bit guarded, but overall very sweet and optimistic with a strong sense of justice and a desire to help people) I think that the show would lean into Billy being pure of heart despite having a rough life. Him and Clark both being people with great powers who choose to o good especially with the parallel of how young Clark first started gaining his powers as a kid about Billy's age, the difference being that Clark had his parents but no superpowered guidance whereas Billy has superheroes that could mentor him but no parents.

(BRB now I'm thinking about Clark taking Billy under his wing, mentoring him as a hero and playing catch with him on the Kent family farm 😭)

[createandconstruct]

Posted this on Twitter but

Idk man… I think what gets me is the weight of this chapter. 430 had a bittersweetness to it but this feels doubled. Perhaps because this is very likely the last time we’ll see these characters but the send off in this extra chapter feels so quiet and melancholy…

[dailybakudekusong]

Today's Daily BakuDeku Song Is: Follow You - Imagine Dragons

Call you up, you've been cryin', cryin' all night You're only disappointed in yourself, alright Taking those, taking those losses if it treats you right I wanna take you into the sunlight If the world would only know what you've been holding back Heart attacks every night Oh, you know it's not right

[extasiswings]

Currently rereading (via the audiobook) The Duchess Hunt by Lorraine Heath, and maybe it’s just enhanced by the narration but I had forgotten the sheer Comedy of Kingsland’s obliviousness at the beginning, wherein every time he mentions the fact that Pettypeace is handling his search for a wife someone is there to be like “…my guy…” #judgment because the only person who doesn’t know she’s in love with him is him.

[flying-cat]

my brain, 7 times a day: you mean... you're... quirkless again?

[pooks]

Cassidy: Merula! :D Merula, triggered: MOVE, SCUM! Cassidy, several feet behind Merula: ...I'm not in your way, though...

[tinyspringtrap]

played mystery heroes competitive last night and got my main it's been a while since someone complimented my Mercy ;w;

[oofouchhimbones]

for someone who was deeply invested in the way you can see the bones of a much better story poking through all of my hero academia, watching naruto is like going on a fucking archeological dig for the entire intact skeleton