#i ve never been unhappier

[whatarenargles19]

Last night I read this book called "I've never been (un)happier" by Shaheen Bhatt. I don't think ive read something so honest ever. It's a book about depression more like her experience dealing with it

Reading it I realised that i was so lucky to have never gone through that thought process that feeling which makes you feel to just end everything

Its not a enjoyable book because shaheen didn't write it for people to enjoy. So definitely it will disturbing to some people but I think EVERONE should read this book

We all think that we know how depression feels but the truth is no we don't. It can only be understood by people who've gone through it. Having reading the book I just got the gist of what its like and I got so scared.

I still can't understand how people who are in depression deal with it

I honestly cant beacause when I ve bad days I just cry very badly and it looks very ugly but sometimes there comes a point when yhere are no tears and it makes everything more frustrating

Shaheen describes this in a very haunting manner.

This is not a review of her book, its a plead to all of you who are reading this to please read that book

[satxnsupreme666]

Tainted love: Dark!Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader/Agatha Harkness/Agnes x fem!reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Alright so this starts as a Dark!Wanda Maximoff x reader and then it turns to be Agatha Harkness x reader (I really like the idea of Agatha helping and saving reader)

Based on the cover songsTainted love by Holy Wars and Hannah Peel´s cover of the same song

Summary: You´re living an unhappy marriage with Wanda and your neighbor Agnes decides to help you to get away from the person who makes you suffer.

Warnings: Toxic relationship, angst, Wanda maintains you captive inside Westview, mentions of kidnapping, Wanda manipulates and alters reader´s memory, gaslighting, mentions of blood.

Word count: 12k+

Author´s note: This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.

I hope you like it!

If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️

Taglist: @midnight-lestrange  @eliscannotdance

 Sometimes I feel I’ve got to

“Printsessa you don´t have to worry about anything! You´re fine here with me, what´s outside doesn´t matter to us, there´s nothing important outside!” You remembered Wanda hissing at you all of those words, but you didn´t understand why it felt like a dream, as if it wasn´t real, you were sure she had yelled at you the day before today but then, why it felt as if you had dreamt about it, the memory was a little blurry but you could remember her frustrated face, was it real? If it was, why were you discussing about? You couldn’t tell.

You couldn’t remember what had happened yesterday, had you gone out for some groceries? Had you gone to Dottie´s place? Why you couldn’t remember?

You sat up in your bed, and more questions came to your mind, at what time had you gone to sleep yesterday? Why you couldn’t remember simple things like that? You started to feel frustrated and tried to focus on your mind, what were all of these images of Wanda and you discussing?

“Why do you want to go outside so bad? Here you have everything you need, I´m giving you everything you want, I don´t understand why you want to leave, it doesn’t make sense to me!” Was this a memory? Have you dreamt about it? Wanda would never yell at you right? She wouldn’t never yell at you; she had told you that many times, you repeated yourself in your mind.

“Printsessa? Are you alright?” You heard Wanda asking beside you, you felt her hand passing around your waist

“I don´t know” You said while closing your eyes.

“Are you having nightmares again, my love?” You frowned

“Nightmares?” You asked with a confused look on your face

“Yes, don´t you remember? You´ve been having nightmares for the past days, you always wake up in the middle of the night, and I have to calm you, did you have nightmares again?” Wanda was really concerned, so they were just nightmares? That had to be.

But why were you doubting? You believed her right? She couldn’t be lying, could she?

“I don’t remember having them, but-“ Wanda suddenly moved herself to get closer to you and her sudden action made you feel scared, unconsciously you moved to the side and you blinked, why had you done that? You weren’t scared of her, then why did you do it?

You could see the hurt in her eyes, and you couldn’t help but feel bad, you had wanted to touch her hand to say something, but you felt there was something wrong, you couldn’t shake the feeling off.

“I can make them go away if you want lyubimaya moya” You saw the worried look on your wife´s face, there was something missing in the way she spoke, her soft tone was still there but you couldn’t tell what was missing, it felt different, and you felt frustrated, why couldn’t you remember anything from the other days? You only had some glimpses of some things, but you weren’t even sure if they were memories, dreams or nightmares.

“No!” You hastily said, you were surprised with your own behavior, why were you suddenly feeling so afraid of her magic?

“Can I hold you?” Looking at her face the only thing you saw was sadness, but why? You felt the need to let her hold you and rest your head on her chest but there was this part of you, a voice in the back of your head that told you to stay away, but you didn’t get why, she was your wife, you didn’t have to be afraid of your own wife.

Deciding to ignore that unnerving feeling in your heart, you slowly nodded and Wanda started to come closer to you, this time she did it slower, her hands up in the air as if she was letting you know she wouldn’t do anything to you, oddly her action made you feel a lot more comfortable about what she was doing, she passed her hand around your waist, her grip was soft but firm at the same time, you started to relax in her arms and slowly you pressed your head onto her chest, for a moment you felt calmed again, you felt the love she promised you, the heat of her body against yours made you remember of how a home felt.

“I´m really sorry printsessa, I just want us to be happy, but you don´t let me help you, I will make these nightmares go away, nothing will ever make you feel this way, I just want you to be happy” Before you could separate yourself from her, her grip around you became stronger, it wasn’t soft anymore, you could feel her hand on your waist, holding you tightly against her but in a harsh way, you wanted her to stop holding you so harsh but she was stronger, before you could do something else she put her fingers on your temple, you couldn’t do anything else, closing your eyes you felt unconscious in her arms.

Wanda held your unconscious body against her, she hated doing this to you, but the real memories were messing with the fake ones she had put in your mind, she couldn’t lose you, no one more time, she was not going to let that happen, you had been gone for so long and now that she had you back, she was not planning on letting you go, after all you were alright with her, nothing could hurt you anymore.

“I´m doing this to you because I love you y/n, you´re safe here with me, just with me, I would never hurt you” Wanda whispered into your ear, her eyes closed, her grip on you started to become softer and with her free hand softly caressed your face, Wanda hoped you would understand why she was doing this, it was all for you.

Get away from the pain

 You woke up to an empty bed, where was Wanda? Frowning you stood up from your bed, you couldn’t help but feel as if you had already woken up hours ago, was it in the morning or in the middle of the night? Or maybe you just hadn’t slept well, and that was why you felt so sore.

Maybe taking a shower would help to ease the pain in your head, your headache was growing and you just wanted to lay back in bed again, but you felt as if you had already slept for many hours, you really didn’t want to go back to bed.

Physically you felt exhausted, the constant headaches were awful and the tiredness you felt almost all the time was unbearable, you wanted to go out to do something else, but at the same time you didn’t feel like going out.

This made you feel conflicted you just wanted the pain to stop, but you didn’t know how.

You were supposed to be happy; you were sharing your life with Wanda, you were her wife she had given you everything you had asked for, a family, you were living peacefully with her, but then why you felt so miserable? It made no sense at all, you felt so alone in this big house, there were so many rooms and you felt like every single thing hid something inside them.

A piece of paper on your nightstand distracted you from your thoughts, you knew it had been Wanda the one who left the small paper, taking it into your hands you saw Wanda´s handwriting, she had gone out again, this time she told you it was something about her job? Last time it had been something about a committee, it was alright, you started to relax a little but, why? You missed her terribly but at the same time there was this part of you that made you want to get away from her, she had never yelled at you or hit you, but whenever she was close to you, the way her hand gripped you a little too harsh, the way she told you everything would be alright, made you feel a little uncomfortable, there was a memory of her in your mind, a memory of a loving Wanda who used to hold you against her chest, singing Sokovian lullabies into your ear when you were afraid, her touch used to be soft, now her touch was severe.

A bunch of new thoughts started to come to your mind, Wanda said they were nightmares, but were they really nightmares? You tried to focus on these thoughts, how her behavior had changed, all the little things that she now did, you remembered she had always been a jealous person, but her new possessiveness scared you.

If she saw you talking to someone, she would get so jealous, so jealous that you even feared her reaction.

What she used to do was what made you stop talking to everyone who was just being nice to you, you didn’t understand her harsh tone against the others, but what made you feel more confused was that the others didn’t mind Wanda talking to them the way she did, like that time when Dottie had asked you how your days had been going at the supermarket, you were sure Wanda was on the other side of the store, she had told you she would go check for some fruit and you wandered around, you bumped into Dottie near the cereals isle, Dottie only asked you a simple question and before you could even answer, Wanda appeared out of nowhere, telling Dottie to go bother someone else, that she was not in the mood to deal with her, your wife didn’t even give Dottie time to explain herself, you couldn’t even hear a word Dottie said, because your angry wife took your wrist with such an angry and harsh grip, guiding you to the entrance, you didn’t even buy anything!  

Wanda dragged you to your house, all the way to your home she didn’t say anything to you, you felt so scared to even talk to her, Wanda didn’t notice she was hurting you, you tried taking her hand off you but that only made her angrier.

You blinked several times, here there were those memories again, at this point you were pretty sure they were memories, but when had they happened? You just wanted to know what was going on, Wanda told you that she loved you, but why it didn’t feel like that anymore?

Trying to ignore all of these thoughts you decided to go for a walk, now that Wanda wasn’t at your home, you had the chance to go out without her constant surveillance, maybe you could even talk to someone other than just your wife, it didn’t matter who, you just needed someone else to talk about anything, at this point you didn’t even care what it could be, you even wished you could find Dottie to just hear her talking about her meetings.

After changing your clothes, you went downstairs, looking around everything you felt there was something so strange about this house, and you couldn’t even put your finger on what it was, you felt awful, frustrated, you couldn’t even remember many things, and this only made you feel worse.

Going outside your house you notice how everything was so nice, the day was really pretty, the sun wasn’t too bright and the wind was refreshening, it was good to be outside, you didn’t even remember when was the last time you had been outside alone, it felt like it had been days since you were on your own here outside.

Walking through the streets you noticed there wasn’t anyone outside, what was going on? Why nobody was in the streets? Not even Dottie was in her garden, there weren’t children playing in the street, how was that even possible? You tried to think If the other times when Wanda and you had gone for a walk, there were people a lot of people for what you could recall, you even went to some houses to try to see if there were people in there, but you couldn’t see anything, and fear took over you, your lips started to tremble, everything was quiet and you found the silence unsettling, there was definitely something odd happening, after some more minutes of wandering alone through the solitary street and with your pounding heart you decided to walk back to your house.

“Y/n sweetheart?” A voice distracted you from your thoughts, you turned yourself around too look at the person who had called you.

 “Agnes!?“ You exclaimed with a happy tone, you were happy to see someone else, and Agnes was a gentle person to you, so you felt really happy to see her

"Thanks you’re here, it seems like you’re the only person around here” You said, with your voice trembling a little.

Agnes noticed your agitated state and felt concerned about you, you were really upset and she could see it, the way you were constantly rubbing your hands against your clothes, the way you were looking your surroundings as if you were afraid of something appearing, she was sure it was because Wanda wasn’t near this place, she was sure Wanda had gone to the limits that was why no one here was moving, but she didn’t want to scare you or upset you more.

“Oh darling it may be because it’s Sunday and everyone must be watching that show that airs on Sundays” She tried to reassure you with a smile on her face, her answer seemed to calm you a little bit because you stopped biting your lip as well as you stopped turning your head to look at your surroundings, your shoulders also seemed to relax a little more, and that made her feel a little calm, she didn’t like seeing you in such a distressed state.

You thought a little about her answer and it made sense to you, you remember that show that Wanda liked to watch on Sundays, but another thought came to your head, if it was Sunday then why Wanda had told you she had left for something related to work?

“Isn’t Wanda with you?” Agnes noticed how you shook your head a little at the mention on her name

“She’s not home, she left for-” You thought a little about whether was right to tell her or not, Agnes wasn’t a bad person, you couldn’t remember interacting a lot of her, but at the same time you felt you had already talk to her many times, she made you feel calm, her presence was recomforting and there was this feeling that made you trust in her.

“She left for something related to work” You saw how Agnes frowned at that.

It didn’t make sense to her, Wanda didn’t even work? She was going to ask you more things but the way you looked, she felt bad, you looked too tired and the sadness and you had in your eyes, she couldn’t see you like this, it was clear you were suffering.

“Would you like to come home with me? You can help me with a new recipe I’ve been wanting to try for some time doll” She softly asked you and you liked the idea, you really wanted to do something else so you nodded, you saw the way she smiled and you smiled too, she waited for you to start to walk and the two of you walked side by side, arriving at her house she opened the door for you and a quick memory of Wanda opening a door for you in a complete different place came to your mind, you blinked a little, what had been that?

“Are you alright sweetheart?” Agnes noticed how your expression changed for a confused one.

“I’m alright” you told her in a rush and she let you in, you slowly entered and you felt different, it was a different feeling to be inside her house.

Agatha knew you weren’t alright, she knew what Wanda was doing, she knew everyone else was under Wanda´s mind control, but why would she do it to the person the red-head was supposed to love? Her first plan had been to take Wanda’s powers, but now her plans had changed, she wanted to take your suffering away, she had tried to wake you up many other times, using her powers and it didn’t work, Wanda’s powers were really strong, the only thing that could wake you up was that you went outside Westview, but she knew Wanda wouldn’t let you do that, so she had to think of something else. She needed to do it quickly you were really suffering and she was sure Wanda’s magic had started to mess with your head, you didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. For now, she could only try to make you feel a little better. She had to try to make you feel a little happy in all this messed up situation.

“Alright doll, so wanna start with the fun?” She asked you with her cheerful tone.

“Sure, yes, I love cookies, I want to help you bake them, where do we start?” You asked her trying to ignore the intrusive thoughts that came to your mind.

“First you will need an apron, you don’t want to get yourself stained with eggs and chocolate powder, right darling?” You nodded and she showed you a really pretty apron, she handed it to you and when you were about to tie it, she took the laces that were in your back.

“Let me do it for you darling” You felt shy at her action, you knew she used to be like that all the time, so you let her tied them for you, it was a nice gesture.

“Alright darling there you go” Agnes winked at you and you shyly smiled.

“Then let’s start, shall we doll?” You nodded and she grabbed different bowls, spoons and containers and placed them on the kitchen Island.

You came closer to her and she asked you to start pouring the eggs on the bowl but when you were about to do it, she stopped you.

“Wait darling, aren´t you going to take your pretty ring off your hand?” She inquired eying the ringer in your finger.

You blinked your eyes and slowly turned your look to your fingers, you didn´t think about it and a question came to your head, when did Wanda and you got married? Why couldn’t you remember it? You frowned a little thinking about that, why couldn´t you remember that? It was supposed to be an important moment of your life and you couldn’t recall that day.

“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agnes asking behind you.

“Yes, yes I´m alright” You said slowly to her, and took off the ring of your finger

“Do you want me to put that in a safe place so you don’t lose it?” You gave the ring to her and she took it in her hand, you saw that she put it in a small box in one of the shelves.

“Alright doll, now you can keep doing what you were going to do” Agnes said walking back to the kitchen island with her typical smile on her face.

You smiled and started to mix the ingredients in the bowl, you were really grateful to do something new, you couldn’t even remember when had been the last time you had done something else than just staying at home with Wanda and sometimes going out with her for some groceries or a short walk, Wanda was always with you now that you thought about it, but it was more like if you were under her surveillance, you shook your head, you were really enjoying your time with Agnes so you tried to push aside these thoughts.

Agnes was a really sweet person, she was attentive all the time you were there with her, if you had a question on how much of something you had to add she would explain you carefully, step by step, her perfume was really sweet you liked the vanilla smell that came from her.

“Honey you have some, let me help you” First she gestured to your face and when you try to clean whatever it was in your face Agnes laughed because you had just spread more the flour in your face, so she came closer to you, and with a napkin on her left hand she softly removed the flour off your face, her touch was so delicate, you wanted to stay like that a little bit more, but you quickly thought about Wanda, so you quickly separated yourself from Agnes and kept cleaning the kitchen island.

Agatha pouted a little, she would have liked to keep caressing your face, but she wouldn’t do it if you were uncomfortable about it.

You had a lot of fun with her and you enjoyed your time with Agnes, she was hilarious, you felt happy here with her, she made you feel good and you liked the feeling.

The older woman put the cookies in the oven and when she closed it, she went back to help you put everything you had used in the correct place.

“Can I put some music?” You asked shyly

“Of course, darling” She answered you and you happily went to turn the stereo on, the music started and it was your favorite song playing, so felt happier, at home you didn´t listen music at all, or did you? You couldn’t even tell, not again the thoughts.

“Hey doll would you like to do something else while the cookies are ready?” She asked you because she saw the distressed expression on your face, she just wanted you to be busy with something else.

“Yes” You blurted out, you didn’t need to think twice.

“We can play a boardgame, would you like that angel?” You nodded and felt your heart melt at the endearment, it felt so different, the way Wanda used to call you scared you, and you didn’t even know why.

You saw that Agnes went upstairs and minutes later she came back with a boardgame, you helped her placed everything on the living room´s table and when finally everything was placed and you had your tokens you started to play, it was awesome, Agnes had always a funny remark to say, you couldn’t stop laughing at her comments, you really enjoyed playing the game with Agnes, you were at peace, you felt inner peace, you didn’t feel like you needed to stay away from her like the way you felt with Wanda, you felt genuinely happy here with Agnes and you loved the feeling.

You played with her many rounds until you heard the alarm Agnes had set thirty minutes ago and you and her stood up from your sits to go for the cookies.

She took the cookies out of the oven and she placed them on the kitchen counter to make them cool a little, they looked really great and they smelled delicious.

“These look awesome Agnes” You said to her while pointing at the cookies with the pretty different shapes.

“That´s because you helped me, that´s why they look so good sweetheart” You couldn’t help but feel a little shy, you smiled at her biting your lip a little, you waited some minutes until she told you could start to eat them now that they weren’t too hot.

You were excited and you took one in your hand you were about to start eating the cookie you were grabbing in your hand but you heard a harsh knock on Agnes´ door.

You and Agnes frowned, who could it be? You saw how Agnes burrowed her eyebrows and she gestured you with her hand to wait for her, you understood and she went to answer the door

When she opened the door, you heard an angry Wanda and at the sound of her furious tone you instantly tensed in your seat.

“Where´s y/n?” You heard Wanda asking in an angry tone, fear took over you, you knew she wasn’t happy she was mad, really mad, maybe it hadn’t been a good idea to come into Agnes´ house, you started to regret your decision.

“Calm down darling, she´s here with me, we baked some cookies” You were too scared to even turn around when you heard quickly steps getting closer to you.

“What are you doing here?” You heard Wanda´s voice really close to you and you tensed more.

“I just, I helped Agnes to bake cookies” You said in a fearful tone, why were you so afraid of her?

“But you could have baked them all by yourself at home, you could have waited for me to arrive home and we could have baked them, you didn’t need to come here” You didn’t know what do or what to say, you just stared at the table in front of you.

“Oh darling, why are you so angry, I´m pretty sure she just wanted to get some fresh air, we haven’t seen her outside in days” Agnes said I a light tone, but when you heard she had said days, you lifted your head to look at your wife and you saw how her eyes went wide.

“Where´s your ring?” She asked you in a harsh tone changing the topic.

“I took it off so it didn’t get stained” You quickly said to her, you didn’t know where the courage had come out.

“Where is it?” She asked you again.

“It´s here darling I put it in a small box so she didn’t lose it” You saw how Agnes went for the small box and she took the ring out of it, she was giving it to you but Wanda quickly took it from her hand, she took it And you saw how Agnes burrowed her brows.

Wanda stretched her hand out to you with the ring on her hand and you got confused.

“Put it back” Wanda demanded, Agatha felt her blood boiling, how could she treated you like that? You deserved more, but she had to wait, she couldn’t risk it, she had to think carefully what to do next so Wanda didn’t hurt you, or mess with your mind again.

You were doubting, she was your wife yes, but she didn’t have to talk to you like that, you slowly took the ring from her hand and put it back on your finger.

“Let´s go” She said and started to walk towards the door, you turned your head to look at Agnes, and she saw the fear and doubt in your eyes.

“It´s alright doll, you have to go, don´t be afraid” She told you and that made you feel better, you nodded and she gave you a quick squeeze to your hand.

  The love we share

 Wanda and you arrived to your house and after you entered you flinched when Wanda slammed the door.

“Why did you go outside?” Wanda demanded to know; you didn’t want to turn yourself around to see her angry face.

“Why did you go outside?” You heard asking again.

“I just wanted to! I can´t stand being here all the time” You blurted out

“But we go outside! You can go outside when I´m here with you!” She answered back

“Bu why can’t I go outside alone?” You started to raise your voice a little, you didn’t understand why she was acting like this

“Just look at what you did today, you went to Agnes´ house and you even took your ring off!” She was being irrational.

“I didn’t do anything! I just talk to you, you don´t let me talk to anyone else anymore”

“How do you remember that?” Wanda quickly inquired.

“What? What do you mean? What are you implying?” You started to question and you saw how Wanda´s expression changed, that scared you a lot.

“I´m sorry printsessa, I didn’t want to scare you, I just, I´m worried about you” Wanda started to walk slowly and her sudden change of behavior made you fear her.

“Can I give you a hug?” You didn’t want to, you knew she was thinking something, you really didn´t want to let her hug you, there was something off, you just knew, unconsciously you stepped back

“Please my love I just want to hug you, like I always do” She started to walk faster towards you and you just felt the need to run.

You started to run towards your room but she used her magic to stop you from going upstairs.

“I´m really sorry my love, I can´t let you go, you´re mine, I´m only doing this to you because I love you”

“Wanda, please you don´t have to, this is not love, you don´t-“

“That´s not true! I love you; I DO love you, never said the contrary!” Wanda yelled at you making you close your eyes, you were trembling, at this point you were sure she had been the one messing and changing your thoughts.

“Please, Wanda you´re hurting me!” You squinted, it hurt, it hurt physically and mentally, you couldn’t keep with this.

“I´m sorry, I´m really sorry my love, I have to, If I don´t do it, you´ll get away from me, and I can´t let that happen, not again” She had tears in her eyes and you didn’t know why, you were the one who was in pain

“I swear to you, I won´t go away from you, I swear it, just please don´t do this again” You were pleading but she didn’t listen, Wanda came closer to you and she pressed her fingers against your temple, and once again Wanda caught your unconscious body against her.

“I´m really sorry for this printsessa, but I don´t want to lose you again” She whispered into your ear.

And I’ve lost my light

That night you dreamt of a different place from this one, you saw many people you couldn’t recognize, a tall blonde man who smiled at you kindly, a red-head woman hugging you and telling you that everything was going to be okay, a man with a serious expression and a metal arm saying comforting words to you, you couldn’t tell who they were but all of them seemed concerned they were worried, but why?

After that you started to had nightmares, there was a war, a big man, many people fighting against some type of creatures, and then you saw Wanda her eyes glowing red she was using her power to lift something big, but also you saw her crying over someone, that was really blurry, she was holding someone on the ground and then you didn’t see anything more.

 When you woke up again, you were surprised you remembered everything that had happened the day before, how could it be? This time you remember what Wanda had done to you, how she had used magic on you, it had been real, everything she had done was real, now you were aware, Wanda had been using her powers to erase some events and things that had happened.

You were relieved that Wanda wasn’t in the bed with you, there was another piece of paper on the nightstand and you quickly took it.

-I’m going out for work printsessa, I hope you slept well, I have a surprise for you, we can go outside if you want when I arrive home, love you-

Her small letter made you feel angry, how could she do this?

What caught your attention was the ring on your finger, she hadn’t taken the ring off your hand, but what surprised you was that the little diamond wasn’t white anymore, now it was completely purple, you thought about whether it was a good idea taking it off or not, but in the end you did it and left it on the nightstand.

You started to be more scared, now that you were sure Wanda was manipulating your thoughts so that you didn’t remember what she had done to you, you started to doubt more about her, what else had she changed in your mind? What was this place? Why where you here? What had she done to you? You couldn’t even remember more about your life. You needed to calm down a little, if you think about it, Wanda wouldn’t be back until noon, you didn’t know where she really went and you really didn’t care, you just needed to get out of this place, you couldn’t take it anymore, you used to love Wanda you were sure about it, even if you couldn’t remember you were sure you used to had something beautiful, what you and her used to have was like a dream, but now it had turned into a nightmare for you.

You really wanted to take a bath, but you didn’t even feel safe in your own house, there was no one else who could help you, everyone here seemed to live just to please Wanda, no one dare to contradict her, as if everybody was scared of her.

You went downstairs, you had the same clothes of yesterday, you weren’t even sure if it had been yesterday or not, did you even have a phone? You didn’t know, you were sure if you had one Wanda wouldn’t even let you use it.

The only important thing you needed to do was to get out of this house as possible as you could, running to the front door you took the doorknob to open the door.

“Damn it” You cursed under your breath, why was the door locked? Where were the keys? You started to look for them, but they weren’t anywhere, you didn’t find them on the bookshelf, they weren’t on the table, they weren’t on the kitchen on counter, not even in your drawers of your room.

Wanda had locked you in your own house, how could she have done that? You couldn’t believe it, why would she do that? You were terrified, this wasn’t supposed to happen, maybe she had just locked the front door, so you went to the back door of your backyard to try to get out.

“Dam it, it´s closed too” You hit with your palm the door, this wasn’t fair, you needed to get out of here, Wanda knew you would try to go out so she did this, what else could you do?

The windows! You quickly went to look for the windows in the first floor but they were closed and even if you tried using all of your strength you couldn’t open them, this was wrong, this was all wrong.

Going upstairs to check on the windows you noticed they were locked as well as the ones in the first floor, when did Wanda had the time to lock them like this? How had she done this? What if she had used her magic to lock them? You were feeling desperate you really needed to get out of here, but how?

You´ll have to break a window, it was the only thing you could do at this point if you wanted to get out of this prison.

You took some of the decorative medium size rocks that were around a potted plant, you didn’t need to think twice your next moves, so you threw the rocks aggressively against the window and you cover your face when it crashed against the big window, pieces of glass went flying and when the crashing sound you turned yourself to look at the now broken window, you smiled at the sight now you could be free from this house, you didn’t want to hurt yourself so you took your jacket off and placed it on the edges of the window so that you wouldn’t cut yourself, after making sure that all the sharp edges were covered, a little insecure you pressed your hands on the edge of it, this was not the time to be scared, you needed to do this.

Taking a deep breath you pushed yourself to be able to jump over the window of the first floor, half of your body had already passed but you didn’t notice there were some sharp edges at the sides of the table until you felt an awful pain on your left hand and arm, you tried to get out faster but your foot got stuck a little and a piece of glass teared part of your jeans, it got to your skin and you hissed, the pain was awful but you needed to get out of this.

You fell onto the grass and grunted a little, you would have liked to just lay there a little bit more, you felt exhausted but you needed to keep going.

“y/n? Oh god, what happened to you darling?” You heard Agnes´ worried voice, lifting your head to look at her she saw your tired eyes and the state you were in, she felt really guilty, she should have done something to help you, Agnes stretched her hands to help you stand and you gladly accepted them, she carefully took your hands carefully not to hurt you more.

“What happened sweetheart?” Agnes saw the broken window and some pieces of glass were covered in some blood and her heart jumped.

“y/n doll are you hurt? Let me see” The woman in front of you softly took your face in her hands looking for wounds on your face, you could see how upset she was, the worry in her eyes and the troubled expression she had, her eyes were so pretty and you felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest.

Stop, you thought, this was not the time for that, not now.

“I´m alright Agnes, I´m not hurt, you need to help me, Wanda locked me inside the house and I had to break the window to get out” You blurted out and you saw how Agnes clenched her jaw in ager, you couldn’t take it anymore and started to cry, you were desperate, you just wanted Wanda to stop, why couldn’t she just let you go? You threw yourself into Agnes´ arms and she carefully hugged you back, your sobs were breaking her heart, it had taken some time to understand what was going on with you and Wanda, at first when she arrived at Westview because of Wanda´s magic and she saw you, she just thought you weren’t having a great day, but your confused stare at what was supposed to be your house raised her suspicions, then the way she saw how Wanda dragged you to different places with harsh grip on you or the way she talked to you when someone else got near to you to start a nice conversation, she knew what had happened to Wanda,  but she didn’t knew anything about you, she didn’t know why Wanda had brought you here but she felt awful for you, your constant tired and sad look on your eyes, the way you would always look down at the ground, not even daring to look at Wanda, what had she done to you? Why did you look so scared of her? Agatha started to suspect there was something more going on between you and her, because sometimes you didn’t even get out of your house for days, the first time that she remembered that happening was two weeks after she had arrived for the first time.

All of you were in one of Dottie´s meeting, during the meeting you had been sitting next to Wanda all the time, with her hand on your waist and you even looked as if you were afraid to move, from time to time she kissed your cheek and you just stayed there, tensed the entire time, she had wanted to do something to make you feel a little less tense, maybe talk to you or made you laugh but Wanda didn’t let you alone until she found the perfect opportunity, when the meeting was over everyone dispersed and went to talk with different people some women were chatting with the others and she saw how Wanda told you something in your ear and you just nodded looking at the ground, then Agatha saw how you walked to the deckchairs and you sat down in one of them she followed you to talk a little with you, when she got near you, she saw how you just were staring at the water not even moving at all, and she frowned, why were you always so quiet?

“Hi doll, are you bored?” She asked you sitting next to you in the other chair, she saw the way you jumped a little at the sudden voice of hers.

“Hi Agnes” You shyly smiled and gave her a quick glance to her, turning your head quickly to look at the water again.

“I´m just a little bored, I would like to go now, but Wanda keeps talking to Dottie” You admitted to her, in that moment she frowned why wouldn’t just leave then? Maybe you didn’t want to go alone, she thought

“What if I accompany you to your house?” She kindly asked you and she saw how your eyes lit up for a moment.

“That would be great, but I have to ask Wanda first” The blue-eyed woman saw the way you thought about it for a moment and she nodded, you were Wanda´s wife after all.

“I´m going to ask her, wait here” You kindly smiled at her and she nodded again at you, she saw how you stood up from the chair but what disconcerted her was the way you walked towards your wife, as if you were scared of getting too close to her, she saw the way you hesitate to touch her arm, when you finally did it, you never dare to look her in the eyes, you  just stared at the glass Wanda was holding, Agatha knew there was something wrong, why would you be afraid of your own wife? She saw the way your lips almost trembled to her while you spoke and when you stopped talking to her she saw Wanda smiled at you and how she hugged you, you didn’t return the hug you just stayed still, after separating from you Wanda said something to Dottie and your wife took your hand to start walking towards her, when Agatha saw your face again she could swear you were scared, Wanda and you walked until you were standing in front of her.

“Thank you so much for offering to take my wife home, but I will take her home, you shouldn’t have to worry, I was almost finished, but thank you for the offer, right y/n?”

Agatha saw the way you quickly nodded and you didn’t even dare to lift your head to look at her.

“It was good to be here, but we´re leaving” Wanda was smiling at her but she couldn’t shake the strange feeling about her.

After that day she didn’t saw you for four days in a row, she saw how Wanda came out of your house and entered again hours later, the fourth day Agatha hadn’t seen you she decided to ask Wanda what was going on, so when she was in her garden and she saw that Wanda had arrived to your house she quickly went to say hi to Wanda.

“Hey darlin! I hope you´re enjoying your day at all, isn’t y/n with you? I haven’t seen her in a while” Agatha asked with a smile on her face, her expression didn’t match with the real emotions she was feeling, Wanda turned herself slowly from her front door and walked towards her, her annoyed expression changed into a fake smile just in the nick of time.

“Oh hi Agnes, I´m enjoying my day yes, I was just going to pass a lovely evening with my wife, she´s been feeling a little under the weather, that´s why you haven’t seen her, she decided to stay at home, but don´t worry, she´s getting better, so you don´t have to worry about her”  And with that Wanda went back to her door and entered to your house.

The next day she saw you, at the center of the town, Agatha had the unsettling feeling that there was something else behind all of this,  you were smiling and letting Wanda hug you as if nothing had happened days ago, you were holding hands with her and this time, you seemed to be happier, but Agatha had the feeling that was not the real way you were feeling inside.

And now that she was seeing you here, holding your trembling body against her she knew she had to help you, she couldn’t keep seeing you suffering.

Agatha had to do something, it had been so wrong to wait to do something, now you were here physically hurt because Wanda had locked you in your own house, your body was shaking with fear, this time she wouldn’t let that Wanda messed with your head again, not again.

“You´re safe with me doll, it´s alright, I won´t let Wanda get near you again, she won´t ever hurt you again” She was holding you tightly against her and for the first time you felt safe, you just wanted all of this suffering to end.

She took your hands in her and looked at you straight in your eyes, your beautiful eyes were red from all the crying, she needed you to explain things to you first, but she needed to do it quickly before Wanda came looking for you again.

“You´ll be fine” You heard Agnes say to you and she took your hand in hers waiting for you to walk, she guided you to the back door of her house and you followed her, she was holding you hand with a soft grip on yours, it felt so different as the way Wanda grasped your hand.

 Once I ran to you

 Agnes guided you inside her house and once again you felt at peace, you didn’t feel tense or afraid here with Agnes, the older woman made you feel safe.

“Sweetheart first I need to clean these wounds, would you let me?” You nodded and she made you sit in her couch.

Agatha couldn’t stand seeing you this way, you looked so broken, she knew there was more behind this, she wanted to make you smile, the times you had shared with her, the times you didn’t remember because she was sure Wanda messed with your memories, she was happy that you had asked her for help, she was sure that the spell she had put in your ring the day before had helped you, that spell at least helped you a little so that Wanda didn’t altered your memories, she wanted to tell you everything, but first she needed to take care of your cuts.

“I´ll be back quickly, I need to get some alcohol and cotton gauzes” She caressed your face a little before going to her bathroom, for what she needed.

You started to relax a little in here, you didn’t feel any pressure, it was good to be here with her.

You her quick steps coming closer to you and the sound of her rushed steps didn’t scare you as how Wada´s had made you feel when she came to your side demanding to know what you were doing with Agnes.

“Angel, let me see the cuts, I´ll be as gentle as possible, I don´t want to hurt you more than you already are” You felt touched by her words, so you showed her your arm and your hand, those were the ones that hurt the most, she cleaned the cuts and applied alcohol on them, then she put the cotton gauze and she did the same with the cuts in your leg, you really liked her gentle touch against your skin, it felt so nice to know that she didn’t want to hurt you, when she finished she placed everything in the small table in the living room and looked at you.

You saw how she brought her hand to your face and she softly caressed your cheek, unconsciously you lent into her touch, it was so nice to feel how she treated you with such delicacy, you were not expecting when she suddenly knelt in front of you, her hand were resting carefully in your knees and she was looking at you with almost pleading eyes.

“Doll I need to tell you the truth, but I promise you that you don’t need to be afraid, I just want to help you get away from this, you deserve so much more and I can´t let Wanda keep doing this to you” You said yes with your head and she took a deep breath and closed her eyes before speaking again.

“My real name´s Agatha Harkness” You had thought she was joking but when you saw the serious look on her face you realized, she wasn’t lying.

“I´m a witch, at first I came here, because I felt Wanda´s magic and I had wanted her powers, but my plans changed, I´m not interested in her powers anymore, I just want to help you, I can´t stand seeing the way you´re suffering” She felt some tears threatening to fall at the corner of her eyes, when Agatha saw that you weren’t saying anything and that you just stared at her with a blank expression on your face she started to fear the worst, she didn’t want to scare you, she needed to tell you the truth.

“Doll, I´m sorry I didn’t tell you this before, but please you don´t need to be afraid of me, I don´t want to hurt you, I just want to help you, I put a spell on your ring yesterday so that Wanda´s magic didn’t affected you, I was sure she was going use her magic on you, and before she took you back to your home days ago I knew she would do it, so I planned on coming to see you but in these two days she didn’t leave your house, she was constantly there until now, I saw she had gone out and I decided to go see you but then I heard a loud crash and when I arrived at your house you were laying on the ground that´s when I-“ She didn’t finish her sentence because you had hugged her, you passed your arms around her shoulders and when she felt how close you had pulled yourself to her she passed her arms around your waist, you started to sob again and she quickly removed a little from you to take your face in her hands and with her fingers she wiped the tears away from your face.

“You really did that to the ring?” You asked between sobs but with a smile on your face, you were amazed, thanks to her you got the chance to go out of that house, she nodded and you hugged her again.

“Thank you so much, you don´t know how that helped me, thanks to you I can remember the day you and I made cookies, you don´t know how much I love that memory, I can´t remember a lot of things but I can remember this and it makes me so happy that you did that for me”

“You don´t need to thank me sweetheart I want to help you, I´m so sorry I didn’t do anything before to help you, I tried to wake you up before but Wanda´s magic is too strong, her magic is tied to her emotions and when she´s angry her magic becomes stronger, I don´t know how is that even possible, but I assure you Wanda won´t hurt you again” She took your hands in your and gave them a soft squeeze to them, you nodded and closed your eyes, Agatha pressed her forehead against yours and you felt happy, you felt really happy that you had someone who wanted to help you.

“We need to go sweetheart; we need to leave as fast as possible” You whispered a small “yes” and the two of you stood up.

“Wait I´ll give something to cover yourself sweetheart, it´s could outside” You felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest and when Agatha came back with one of her jackets, she helped you to put on the jacket.

“Thank you” You said shyly and she smiled, you were so beautiful, you deserved to smile and be happy.

“Let´s go darling” Agatha took your hand in hers and she guided you to the door, the blue-eyed woman held the door open for you and she let you go out first, you really loved this gesture of her.

“We need to hurry darling; I don´t know if she can feel you or not, I promise I won´t let her get near you again” Agatha said to you and she started to guide you towards the other side of the street.

“We will have to go towards the other direction” You nodded and the two of you walked down the street.

This tainted love you’ve given

 After what felt hours of walking you finally arrived to the limits of the town and you felt horrified when you saw the people who were frozen on the street.

“What´s all of this?” You asked Agatha while covering your mouth, you couldn’t believe what you were watching.

“I didn’t want to have this conversation with you, I don´t want you to feel scared, but now that you´re seeing all of this, it´s necessary that you know the truth” The two of you stopped walking and she turned herself to look at you.

“This place is an illusion, Wanda created all of this, she´s using her power to make all of these people do what she wants, they can´t help but do everything what Wanda says, these people are frozen because Wanda´s not here, It doesn’t affect me because her magic isn’t able to affect me” She said and you quickly hugged her, it was awful what Wanda was doing.

“I´m really sorry you had to see this sweetheart” Agatha pulled you closer to her body and she softly stroked your hair.

“We need to keep going darling, we´re almost outside” She was right you could almost feel the freedom.

Agatha grabbed your hand again and the two of you walked towards the entrance, when you were close enough you saw something weird in front of you and you turned your head to give Agatha a questioning look.

“This is the magical field that covers Westview, doll, I want you to know that once we cross this field, all the memories Wanda locked inside your mind, you will be able to remember all of these, I know you´re strong enough to handle them, but I will be with you all the time alright?” You were scared you were going to remember everything you couldn’t and that scared you a lot, but you knew Agatha wasn’t lying she made you feel protected and you trusted her.

“Alright, I´m ready” You said to her with confidence, you really wanted to go away from this place.

You felt her hand squeezing your and she nodded to you, you and her walked at the same time and while you started to cross the magical field, you felt some pressure over you, but when you touched the other side the uncomfortable weight on you disappeared, the next thing you knew, a bunch of memories of your real life came to your mind.

You saw your old life back in the Avengers compound, the way your family had vanished into thin air, how Natasha had died for the soul stone, the battle against Thanos, how Tony had died for all of you, you remembered every single thing Wanda had blocked from you.

You also remembered how Wanda had cheated on you with Vision, the way you had felt when you saw her kissing the synthezoid.

You remembered what had happened that day, everything was clear now, she had proposed to you years ago, she used to be a loving and caring girlfriend, but that had been years ago, she used to loved you and you used to love her, you had thought you would be sharing your life with her, years ago she told you how much one day she would love to live with you in a beautiful house of two floors in a really pretty neighborhood, she had sworn to you that she would make everything to protect you from everything and that she would make you happy, but that day when she broke every one of her promises you gave her the ring back, she had pleaded you not to leave her, she had begged you many times to make you stayed with her but you didn’t accept it, and then everything happened so quickly, you didn’t even got time to mourn on your feelings, earth was attacked and after that you had just lost all of your family.

“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agatha asking you, you blinked many times and you noticed tears streaming down your face, you felt Agatha pulling you closer to her and once again you let yourself express all of your pain by crying into her chest, Agatha soothed you and stroked your hair, now that you were finally outside she could see your thoughts and she felt the same pain you were feeling, you deserve to be happy and she was going to make sure of that.

  Tainted love

“Stay away from her” You jumped at Wanda´s voice, there was that accent, you knew there was something missing when she talked to you inside Westview, and now you realized it had been her accent.

“No, you stay away from her” Agatha placed herself in front of you

“Who do you think you are?” You could see Wanda´s eyes glowing red just as well as her hands, for a moment you feared the worst, but when you saw Agatha´s hands glowing purple, you sighed feeling relieved.

“You´re hurting her Wanda, can´t you see it?  this is not healthy" Agatha said to Wanda

“That’s not true! I’m doing this for us, I need her and she needs me! We are meant to be together” Wanda yelled and it made you feel angry, she was hurting you and you were exhausted, you couldn’t believe what she was saying.

“You need to stop Wanda!” You yelled back at her, you placed yourself next to Agatha and all of the anger started to come out of you.

“You hurt me! You made me feel awful, you were manipulating my memories, you used you Magic to make me believe a false life!” You were gesturing at her and you saw how her hands stopped glowing red.

“I love you!” She yelled and you bitterly laughed at that, you wiped some tears that had fallen down your face and you felt Agatha’s hand caressing softly your back, that made you feel better.

“That’s not true Wanda, you don’t love me, this is not love, love is not supposed to be painful, love is not supposed to make you feel exhausted, love is not supposed to scare you, you don’t love me and I don’t lo-”  You were cut off by the read-head

“That’s not true! You love me just as much as I love you! I did this all for us, I did all of this for you, this is our dream, the one we share-”

“You kidnapped me Wanda! You took me away from my home! You kidnapped me and brought me here! That’s not love!” You interrupted her

“That’s not true, that was not your home, this is our home, we can go back to it, we can live peacefully we can go back to our amazing life and forget that all if this ever happened” Wanda started to walk slowly towards you and before she could touch your arm you quickly stepped back.

“Don’t touch me!” You quickly said and Agatha placed herself in front of you.

“You heard her Wanda, you better back off” You saw Wanda’s expression changed into a really angry one

“I won’t repeat myself y/n you better come with me; I love you” You couldn’t understand why Wanda kept saying the same.

“No, I won’t go back to you, you just made me feel awful, you made me feel exhausted, you locked me in that house, YOU DON’T LOVE ME”

“We are married” she quickly said.

“That’s not true, you know that’s not true, we were going to get married years ago but you cheated on me”

You argued back and you saw the way Wanda flinched at the mention of what she had done.

“It was a mistake, I really love you, I don’t want to lose you again, please, you’re breaking my heart, I need you” Wanda knelt in front you she was holding her arms in the air towards you, she was sobbing in front of you, but this time she couldn’t manipulate you, not anymore,  Agatha looked at you and she smiled at you, her smile was comforting, she made you feel safe and now that you could finally remember every single moment you had interacted with her inside Westview, you realized that was how love was supposed to feel.

 Now I know I’ve got to

Run away, I’ve got to

Get away

 You came a little closer to Wanda and you knelt in front of her, Agatha was next to you making sure Wanda wouldn’t do anything to you.

“I’m sorry Wanda, but I won’t go back to you, you don’t love me and I don’t love you, you have to accept that, I can’t be with you, this is not love, what we used to have years ago is over, you have to let it go” You said looking into her green eyes, you didn’t recognize the old Wanda, the person in front of her was full of rage and hatred, you couldn’t blame her at all, she had lost everyone but, this was not fair to you, she was hurting you and you didn’t deserve it, you didn’t feel the same for her.

“Love is supposed to make you feel happy, as if you’re floating on air, love makes you feel safe and protected, love makes you keep going, it doesn’t stop you” Looking back at Agatha she smiled at you and you smiled back at her, she had risked herself to help you get out of it, and you knew that was how love was supposed to be, with Agatha you were sure you could have it, a real love.

“So, you fell in love with her?” Wanda’s voice was louder and you could hear her accent coming back, this time it was more present than ever, you could tell she was really mad, her hands forming into fists and her eyes glowing red in anger, she hastily stood up from the ground and Agatha pulled you closer to her.

“Answer me! Is she the reason you’re leaving me?” You saw Wanda’s jaw clenching and her left eye twitching a little

“She’s leaving you because you just inflict pain into her heart, Wanda you’ve been messing with her mind! She was feeling anxious she didn’t know what day it was, you held her captive inside a place she didn’t want to be, you just made her suffer, she doesn’t deserve this, you’re hurting her, why can’t you understand?”

Agatha was shocked at how Wanda couldn’t see what was the real problem.

“That’s not true, you’re the one who is manipulating her, you’re a liar, you’re not even who you said you were” Wanda kept talking and you felt desperate

“Stop, just stop, I don’t want to listen to you anymore” You said to Wanda while holding your hands in the air, you pressed your fingers against your temple, a headache started to form and it felt awful, you closed your eyes and  you put more pressure of your fingers into your temple.

Agatha came closer to you to softly touch your arm.

“Are you alright sweetheart?” You heard Agatha asking you.

“Don’t call her like that, you don’t have the right, she’s mine, and she will just be mine” Wanda had started to come closer to the two of you.

“Don’t come closer Wanda” you heard the blue-eyed woman warned Wanda.

“What? Do you think I’m afraid of you?” Wanda asked with a mocking tone

“Oh dear, I could easily destroy you with a flick of my hand” the dark-haired woman next to you scoffed, you could almost sense the smirk Agatha had on her face.

“Stop right there” Those were new voices; you lifted your head to see who were they and you saw many soldiers pointing their guns at the three of you.

“Not you again, not this time” The red-head started to move her hands in the air and she made all of the soldiers point to the sky, but the moment you felt you couldn’t move, you realized she was using her magic on you as well.

“Y/n!” You heard Agatha calling your name, purple magic enveloped you and you felt yourself being released, she used her magic to stop you from falling harshly against the ground.

“You need to stop trying to take her, she doesn’t want to be with you, y/n doesn’t need you!”

“That’s not true! She needs me just as much as I need her, I love her-

"STOP!” You snapped and didn’t realize the wave of magic coming from your body, your magic was f/c and when you opened your eyes again you saw Wanda covered in a new different magic, you saw your hands and your eyes widened when you realized it was you the one who this time stopped her from moving.

You gasped and this time you saw all the soldiers on the ground, they were covered with your magic too and you started to panic a little, but when you felt Agatha’s hand on your shoulders you started to relax a little.

“It’s alright sweetheart, I know you can do it, focus on what you’re feeling, don’t let the fear consume you”

Slowly you nodded and focused on what you wanted, you wanted the soldiers to go away, so you moved your hand and when you heard noised this time you opened your eyes to see all of them started to walk away from where they had coming.

“I’m so proud of you darling, you did it amazing, I will make sure they don’t come again” She caressed your cheek and you smiled at her, she stayed with you making sure no one else came to where you were.

“You think you she loves you y/n?” You heard Wanda’s laugh and turned your head to look at herk kneeling on the ground with her hands behind her back and all of your magic over her, she didn’t stop laughing for some minutes, you just couldn’t believe what was happening to Wanda.

“No one will ever love you the way I do” Wanda said back to you when she stopped laughing, you looked straight into her eyes and the only things you could see in them was madness, you felt bad for her for a minute, you knew what she had passed through but all the things she made you passed through as well, you even doubt your own sanity, you couldn’t forgive this, she had kidnapped you and she had messed with your mind, you didn’t even know how many time you were inside with her.

“You don’t love me Wanda, this is an obsession Wanda what happened-

"What happened was a mistake, let me make things right this time printsessa, I really love you, you’re the love of my life! I need you!” She begged you again, but you this time you weren’t going to fall for it, not anymore, you closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before speaking again.

“You don’t really want any more from me, to make things right, Wanda, you can’t make things right, this is messed up, not only you hurt me, but you’re hurting thousands of people, let them be free, let me be free Wanda, please, I want to be free” Tears started to fall down your face

“You need someone to hold you tight printsessa and I’m the one who can do that, I can-

"You can’t Wanda, you broke what we had years ago! You broke me, and there’s no way you can fix this! If you want to make things right, you’ll let me go with Agatha, if you love me, you’ll release me”

“I can’t do that printsessa, you’re mine, you’re just mine I won’t let her or anyone else take you away from me” You saw how Wanda’s eye’s started to glow red and you moved your hands to stop her hands from moving behind her back, she wasn’t going to use her magic on you again, not anymore.

“I’m not yours, I’m not yours, the problem is Wanda that you think love is to pray, but I’m sorry, I don’t pray that way, you won’t get to me again, I don’t love you” You whispered to her loud enough to hear you, Agatha took your hand in hers and you used your magic to pull Wanda back inside Westview.

“I will find you y/n and I will make you mine again, you belong to me” You heard her yelling and Agatha pulled you closer to her.

“I will come for the both of you and I will make you pay for taking y/n away from me, you will pay and I will make sure of that” Wanda tried to break free from your magical ties but you didn’t let her.

“You can’t get away from me y/n I will always be with you and no matter what I will find you-”

Finally, you put Wanda inside the town and Agatha started to make movements with her hands, a purple mist covered the entirety of the town, the magical field Wanda had created was replaced by Agatha’s purple magic.

“This will only keep her inside for some weeks, maybe some months until she realizes how to get out from this, I trapped her inside Westview but this won’t last forever doll” You felt the older woman’s hands taking your face in her hands.

“I’m not afraid” You answered to her and you saw a proud smile on her face

“I know you’re not afraid, you’re so strong and brave, I will be with you, no matter what, I will be with you, I know you can protect yourself but I will protect you too, and when the time Wanda comes for us, I will be by your side, she won’t take you again doll, I promise”

You felt safe with her, she made you feel alright and you couldn’t help yourself, you took her face in your hands and slowly leant into her, Agatha passed her hands around your waist and she pulled your body close to hers, you felt her soft touch on you and that made your heart melt, this is how love is supposed to feel, you knew it, you presses your lips against hers, she captured your soft lips, it was a soft but needy kiss, she needed to feel you and you needed to know she was there for you, you needed to know this was real.

When the two of you broke the kiss, she pressed her forehead against yours her hands never leaving your sides.

“I know it will take a time for you to get used to this, but I promise I won’t hold you back, I want to make sure you’re alright, I want the best for you y/n” You trusted her, you knee she was saying the truth, and you were grateful with her, without her help you wouldn’t have been able to get out of your prison.

“I believe you Agatha, I want to be with you, I know you will help me to heal” You whispered to her and she smiled, she hugged you again, the feeling of your body against her made her feel alive and you felt the same, you weren’t free at all from Wanda, but you knew that Agatha would there for you to help you.

You felt something bothering in your pocket, there was something in it and when you pulled your hand inside it you felt shivers down your spine, pulling out the small piece of metal you saw it was the ring Wanda gave to you because of your “marriage” you were Wanda had been the one who placed it in your pocket with her magic, you eyed it for a minute before throwing it against the grass.

“We have to go doll” She was right, you had to go now.

Taking your hand into hers, Agatha guided you towards the forest, you didn’t know where you were going but you were sure that Agatha would make everything, she could to protect you.

The two of you walked through the forest, between the tall pines, the sound of some branches breaking because you stepped on them was some of the only sounds you could hear, the night was a little cold and from time to time you still feel a little afraid, but when you felt Agatha’s hand softly squeezing you hand to reassure she was there and she wasn’t going anywhere made you feel strong.

You knew Wanda would come for you, you were sure she would do everything she could to find you, but you were sure you wouldn’t be alone this time, you weren’t afraid of her, she didn’t have that power over you anymore.

When Wanda comes for you, you were sure you were going to be prepared, just as Wanda wouldn’t let her take you, you were going to fight Wanda, you’re not afraid of her.

Now I’m gonna pack my things and go

[gayspock]

ehr

i feel like i just resent every fucking person whos ever tried to tell me that you'll find somewhere someday and think about all the places I ve been and existed and left and have never felt a fucking thing because I just never felt anything but a sad and miserable fucking detachment. it felt like uni never happened might as well neve have happened and the same with school and everything else because i just float from place to place and even when 8 try i really try I feel like I'm always just left out and sad and unhappy and I've tried to believe it's not in my head but the evidence is always so fucking undeniable because it's not in my fucking head it's a genuine fucking documentable fucking case of being left out of every single fucking thing all of the time. Being told things weeks and months after it's gone by playing stupid fucking catch up games everyone always hanging out and neve being taken seriously and it's pathetic it's really fucking pathetic I kept crying about it all the time and still do because I know in my heart of hearts I'm notging to most of the people I've crossed paths with and they won't even remember me and they never do and I just keep crying like ah everyone else manages to find people they can at least exist around but if I even as anything im2just fucking not anything now like there's notging to like there's nothing to love I think about how my grandad told me that before that it's too fucking difficult to love me and it's thst unspoken fucking thing most people are too nice to say it or to truly fucking believe it it's a whole load of you'll find something sometime somewhere just keep trying but it will never ever be here and now I'll never be anything meaningful in anyone's lives and I want to get angry and blame people but I can't do anything but cry about how fucking worthless I am and to the point now whwr e I'm thinking about how it was always going to be this how it's always going to be thks how I can't unstick myself how I can't muster the energy to manage anything how I'm dying like this and how I used to fucking try and cope by imagining being with people seeing people regularly and existing in the world or having some sort of life and how this is something nearly everyone else has in some way maybe in smaller doses like they've had it once and it's gone or they have a family member at least who's there to see they're still alive Ispend every day fucking alone and I have done and. I keep thinking OK random aside the aside of I fucking can't listen I don't even try any more because the truth of literally everything JSUT sends me nuts so hearing stupid fucking platitudes and canned fell good crap is never anything but just this. Really cruel exercise of "If you don't respond well to this you're obviously making yourself miserae" anyway the fucking wowee! What would your child self think if they saw you now! Haha surely they'd be so psyched you made it! and it's always been one of those fucking sentiments in particular thst just fucking grips me in fucking horror realising notging fucking changes that I 8sed to cry every fucking day of loneliness back then and sob and wish trying mattered or someone would care and wishing I was safe and I think my child self would fucking hate my fucking guts and that I'm notging but confirmation that it's not getting better, that all the anxiety was right, that there's no fucking way out. Maybe thst it's even worse than that because you do nothing but figure out you're even stupider and worse and there's so many more things you have to deal with and they're so fucking hard to do by yourself and to stop trying so hard because it does nothing but JSUT tire you out and make you sadder but even then at the end of the day it's so fuckkng pointless because who cares who fucking cares you should kill yourself before you're too old it's pointless bro big smile

[booasaur]

oh yeah they some how made mariana go the straight route although it was nice seeing ana explore her sexuality with that lady! i wonder how the show will play out but it sucks to be ready to ve disappointed

praying that even after Ferran gets good w kids Mariana will think “good but not ana” and not ferran >> ana or even pablo

Yeah, part of me can't believe the show would have BOTH of them be queer and pining after each other at different points and still not get together, and with this premise, but then you never know! It truly, truly sucks to still be bracing for a bad ending, after a year of bad endings, especially on Netflix. The number of cancelations, unhappy/bittersweet endings, a literal BYG, it's been rough. A good ending here wouldn't change that but it'd be such a relief, all the same.

It's definitely possible Mariana decides at the end that Ana means the most to her, that's what I'd definitely expect, just have to hope the writers see it through. :o

[pastorsperspective]

Worry's Only Wasted Time

It’s Friday again! If you noticed, there was no blog post last week, I do apologize. I simply never had time within my week to accomplish it at any point and now here we are. If you missed the sermon on Sunday, you can watch it here: https://fb.watch/mvjqNfHwhY/ I was able to chat with Pastor Chad via email regarding the message and it went like this:

I wasn’t really left with a ton of questions after this message, but I have some thoughts. Obviously, things would be easier to commit to if we had some assurance that we were going to succeed at what we were trying to do. If God would show us some glimmer of the future, some shred of what's to come, that it all works out, sure, it would be so much easier to keep fighting the battles. That was the whole point though, right? We will never have that assurance? (Other than the fact that we've read the Bible and we know in the last chapter that God wins, the end.) We don't get to know all the details of how everything in our lives is going to work out, or how God is going to use our trials to better us. We are just supposed to trust that He will. Why is that SO hard though?

I think it's so hard because we want things on our terms. The human-ness of all of us wants to be in control and order all things to what we see is the best. In many ways, this is our self-idolatry or pride getting in the way of our faith. We lose sight and don't want to accept that there is a God who knows more, sees more, and is capable of more than we are. We humans (at the top of the food chain) tend to think we are the supreme beings of the land and to concede that control and order push against our human nature. Stress is a natural response to uncertainty and we want to eliminate stress by being in control of the future. The reality is we are caught up in our own perception of wants and needs that we lose sight of bigger focuses. The harsh reality is, if it were this way and there were no uncertainty we would complain and moan about the lack of spontaneity in our world. Maybe we're just unhappy people (just kidding). The trick is in seeing the beauty in the unknown, finding the excitement in the uncertainty, and growing in faith all the time.

Letting go is probably particularly difficult for women. Not to stereotype, but women are typically the keepers of schedule and order for the household, kids, etc, and carry the mental load for the family. Not knowing HOW something is going to happen is pure torture. We NEED to have the details; we NEED to plan. Or maybe that's just a me thing and I'm projecting it onto "most" women. I can't imagine having been one of the apostles trying to figure out how to feed the crowd! Let alone feeling confident in any man saying, "it'll be fine, just let me pass out these five loaves!" I mean, have you ever planned a dinner party?? I'm getting heart palpitations just thinking about it! How did the apostles know that it was going to be ok? Did they know? Do you think that even until their deaths, the apostles struggled with "believing is seeing"? 

Oh, they didn't, and most scripture points to a sneaking suspicion they all had that this may end horribly. They knew from the get-go that this was radical and different, and would most likely not be perceived well by everyone. As things went along there are hints that this thing was going to end with a bang, and not necessarily a good bang. Christ himself gave several Passion Predictions where he prepared them for the worst, and as the crucifixion took place, they began to understand that their own lives would most likely end up the same. So, all of these clues, red flags, indicators, whatever we want to call them were there, and yet they still hung in there. They never gave up, they never abandoned the call, they followed it even unto death... why? The answer is simple, the grace they found and were called to share with the world was worth dying for. Not only that, it was worth living for as it changed their very lives. The love of Jesus was so powerful in their lives that they couldn't do anything else, and they didn't. I wonder how many would sign up to be Christians today if it were the same; if this faith would cost you your life at some point? The reality is that we're going to lose our lives at some point anyhow, might as well use it doing something that matters. Life itself is fleeting, what we do with it can last forever. This again comes back to giving up control and letting our faith guide our steps, not our own comforts, dreams, plans, proclivities, etc.

Man, that’s hard. I’m sure it’s harder for some than others, just like everything else we do in this life. All people aren’t designed the same, with the same strengths and weaknesses, and that’s a good thing. It’s terrifying to admit that you don’t really have control over anything when you truly think about it. Maybe the small, mundane tasks of your everyday existence, but not much else. Admitting that can be really scary. It reminds me of a song – because all things do.  If you have some time today, check out this song:

Afraid by Tenth Avenue North

My favorite line is “worry’s only wasted time”. There’s so much truth in that statement. I wonder how much time the apostles wasted worrying about feeding the crowd before Jesus performed His miracle with the loves and fish? I wonder how afraid they were? Were they afraid that the crowd would turn on them? God says we don’t have to worry. We don’t have to fear. He is in control and all we have to do is let Him.

Until next time… If you have any thoughts or questions that you would like to share in our blog, send them to me via the church email, text message, call the office, tumblr message, or Facebook message me!

[wolverina2002]

My parents - whom I´m beginning to realize are a gift from whatever gods do exist - asked about children exactly once: after the sex-ed class in eight or seventh grade.

"And? Do you want kids?"

"Hell no!"

They left it alone after that. The regularly check in if I´m happy, because I have previously made myself unhappy to conform to societies expectations without realizing it, so them checking actually helps.

I told them I wanted a doctor´s appointment when I was 14, just to talk things out. Mom went with because of my anxiety. They were incredible, dealing with me getting my period and being a desaster about it, and never once did they bring up future grandchildren.

They have been very supportive about me getting a contraceptive implant. They accepted me being ace, just as they before accepted me having plans to take things a step further with my boyfriend, even though those plans never happend. Dad even bought me a book, I´m seriously tempted to drag him to a pride parade one day. They have been very supportive of me going "gender? S just a label, use whatever you want I guess".

I need to stress that they´re a perfectly straight, cis couple, with as far as I know no queer family members. Dad is a traffic cop.

(If you hate on my dad in the tags I will wreck you. He´s the bestest. He´s more understanding than mom sometimes. I know the police is full of white supremasist assholes in the US but that hasn´t been my experiance in germany, so kindly fuck back off to your echo chamber.)

And yet. And yet. Two perfectly straight, cis, white people have apperantly managed to jump the bar of bare minimum when it comes to respecting their daughters. All three of us, by the way, want very different things. Middle sib wants a themed wedding. No idea what little sib wants but it´s either physical therapy or plane mechanic. Or pilot. Middle sib is the most likely candidate for grandchildren and hasn´t been pushed on it either.

I was never told "you´ll change your mind", or "you´ll find the right one" by my parents. They are deeply happy with one another and with us. They´ve been married 22 years with three children. And yet, when their oldest told them she might want to take drastic steps to get rid of her period, that a sign of being fertile, being female made her hate her own body, that she never, ever wants children or even sex - I recieved nothing but support.

I´m not trying to brag, I can tell I´m desperatly lucky, but ... I guess I´m baffled. How can you not respect your child´s autonomy? How are they somehow "less" for not wanting children?

(It´s also unlikely that I´ll have a successfull career. Autism ahoi. So I´d qualify as a "disappointment" through and through. That word has never come up.)

stop telling your teenage daughters who say they don't want kids that they'll change their mind

[sonalirichard]

🍎 My Precious Amit ji ♥️,

I believed , hoped & waited for Support & Help from You for a very long time , but it was all useless‼️

Your stupid Silence , demonstrative Disregard , and absolute Indifference to what is happening in my Life ~ led to the Saddest Consequences in the end 😡‼️

I lost my only Home , and I had to go outside 😱‼️

I was made a Homeless Person , and You are an Accomplice to this Vile and Cruel Crime because You refused to help Me , hid in the Bushes , and pretended that it did not concern you 😈‼️

Do you think a Woman can survive on the Street , without a Roof over her head , in the Cold & Alone 🥶⁉️

How many days can a Woman live in the Street ⁉️

You have no Idea what I"ve been through ~ it"s called "REAL HELL , NIGHTMARE & HORROR‼️"

All my Life I thought that You were a Kind , Generous , Caring , Understanding & Loving Man , but it turned out that You are completely Different , and this is the complete Opposite of all my Ideas about You 📛

Rose-colored Glasses broke in front of my eyes with the Glasses inside 💔💥💦

You chose to become a Silent & Ruthless Killer rather than a Real & Courageous

Savior‼️

You are not capable of Manly Actions , and You do not even have the Willpower to make the necessary Decisions to Fulfill Your Desires & Dreams 😢‼️🚫

✅ Now You can consider that You Killed Me with your own hands , and Lost Me Forever‼️

Unfortunately , You put an End to my Suffering by simply putting an End to my Life , and not giving me a Saving Helping Hand , as Real Men do 😈‼️

It"s easier for You to Kill than to Save me 😱‼️💦

If there is no Place for me on this Crazy Planet 🌍 , then I have nothing else to do here 📛

🏮🪔🙏 Without unnecessary words , tears & hugs , I have to say Goodbye to You , my Love 💘 💔 💝

Perhaps only in your next Life & your new Reincarnation will You realize how Terrible & Horrible You have done to Me , but it will be too late to Fix it or Atone for it 🙏🥸

You have repeatedly Betrayed Me 😈 , and You are not even capable of Kindness , Compassion &

Love ♥️ towards Me 💧💔🔥...

You have shown yourself from your worst sides , and this is an incredible Disappointment for Me‼️😱🔥

You can calm down ~ A dead Woman will never disturb your Peace of Mind again , and will not ask for Help 💙🤍

You can be sure that I"m gone 🗯

Breathe a sigh of Relief & Relax ~

I left Your World , and

I left You Alone 🙏

I don"t need anything from You , and I don"t need anything from this Crazy World either .

💙🤍💙 I have found Freedom & Eternal Paradise 😇

Live & Rejoice , my Dearest🌹,

You can even be Proud of yourself , because You are a Great Magician , Rich & Greedy Megastar , Smart Manipulator & Cruel Avenger‼️😈

Don"t ask the Gods for Forgiveness ~🙏

They will never Forgive You , because You left Me to die without Help & Support , having all the Possibilities to Save Me ‼️😈😱

Instead of Happiness 💘💘 ,

You give Unhappiness 💔💔.

I"m leaving with a Broken Heart 💔 & a Wounded Soul 🕊

Goodbye , Meri Jaan 💋💋💋

SONALI 🌹

ANGEL 😇

LOVE 💘

[puphoods]

ve literally never been so exhausted and sick and isolated and unhappy in my life than i am rn i cant even lie to u al

[xanadu07]

There are so many things I wish I could have told you, but I just didn’t have the courage. I have strong feelings of all kind, that constantly change and consume my soul. Questions upon questions, overthinking everything. I find myself in deep pain and sadness, so overwhelming that I just lose control. It s your choice if you ignore this, or you reply. But things need to at least be taken off my chest because I genuinely feel I am going insane.

Mostly these things came up to me after our meeting. I was absolutely sure I completely destroyed you, even you made me sure of it. You never lost the oportunity to make me feel that you are mess because of me, and until last months, I was there for you. Since we broke up, even though it was extremely hard for me, I was there. And now I simply cannot understand how do you say the things you say. I mean don’t get me wrong, I am glad that you are okay, but why did you have to destroy me in the process of your healing? I know I was terrible, but why did we go through months of you telling me horrible things, such as “I regret being with you” or “you are the reason I probably won’t love again” only so now you can tell me that someone has feelings for you and you might do something about it? I am not trying to get in your way, but this situation fills me with rage and despair. Why did you do this to me, only to find out in the end that I am the one who has problems such as social anxiety and panic attacks, and meanwhile you do not exclude being with someone else in the near future. Why did you tell me it would crush you if I would find someone but then you are telling me this?

I really don’t want this text to turn into a fight, I just need to let them out. I loved our discussion we had recently, but first thought I had after you left was “she didn’t apologize for a single thing she’s done” I know you don’t care much for apologies, but you are perfectly aware that hearing it might actually make a huge difference. I have probably been guilty for more, but look who is ok now and who is not. It absolutely hurts the shit out of me that I didn’t feel for a split second that you were sorry for the things you ve done to me. What would be the argument? What I did was worse? It so probably is, but that doesn’t mean that you can do this and just not feel sorry for a second. You said you care about me, so hear me out. To my maximum capabilities I’ve done absolutely everything I could to care for you. I know I have done plently mistakes but I kept going. I chose to dissapear when I noticed that I am not capabale of helping you, and you healed yourself.

It is so difficult to write all this, I don’t even know what I feel right now. Do I still love you, or do I love the memory of you? Do I miss you, or do I miss us? On one hand, I feel like leaving you was the biggest mistake I’ve ever done, but on the other hand I feel it was the right thing to do. Under the wrong circumstances but the right thing to do. Because even ignoring the things I have done we have got to a point where we couldn’t resonate as we could past years. On the day of our breakup, when I told you I lost feelings, that was bullshit. I thought I did because of the things that accumulated and the fact that we actually reached a breaking point in our relationship where it would have been extremely hard to continue. Now that you are better I am sure you feel the same. But do we feel the same on other things? You see, I don’t want you to love me, because loving me made you unhappy. It’s wierd, I am wierd. I wish you nothing but happiness, but a little thing inside me is killing me that I couldn’t offer you this anymore. On the other hand I feel grateful for everything that happened. So, here I am, stuck between feelings, but one thing I know for certain. You will always mean a lot to me, and in my way, I will always care for you and love you. Even though I feel you got me to a point from where it is impossible to get up, I will always love you. And I will do it how I love best, and how I will surely not hurt you. From the distance. I may be loving a memory, but that’s how you remained in me, the most beautiful memory. I can see just the most beautiful part of you, and even if you did what you did to me, I love even that version of you. I know you are sorry and you did not mean it, but it would mean the world if I actually heard it from you. It’s completely up to you, if you answer to this or not. I just, really needed to say it. Didn’t want to text you, but I wanted you to see. Somehow you are still the most important to me. And I can’t understand why I feel what I feel, and I am even questioning if I actually feel this, or I am just depressed and caught inside a cage of guilt and suffering. I did the best I could, even know, the thought of hurting you makes me cry, and even if you hurt me, you do not seem to care enough to say a lousy “I am sorry” for it. I do not want to anger you, please try to believe that this words have the tone that I had on the night we met. I am sorry for everything, I am sorry for existing, I am sorry for being toxic to you, I am sorry for hurting you. I just desperately seek redemption and it seems I may not even deserve it. I am such a mess. I am glad you are not, but I am so confused of how things changed so fast. I am in severe pain. I know you cannot be here for me, I won’t dare to ask it because it would hurt both of us, but I actually feel like this is how I will be from now on. I want you to be happy, and I feel that my poor existence stands in your way. I am hurting so bad, but I probably deserve it. The wheel has turned, as you warned me, and maybe your are happy about it. So let it be the way it is. Maybe I actually am a horrible person and only deserve suffering, and maybe you are a great person and you only deserve happiness. I am sorry for my life, I am sorry for wasting your time, I am sorry for feeling sorry. Oh my, I am such a mess. Please don’t be angry with me, because it seems that your attention controls me. I hate it, but I love it. I am such a fucking mess and I hate to blame you for it, but I am just trying to put down in words everything that my head is. So you see, I’m in trouble. I am sorry I am putting you through this. May this be something you respond to, or may this be my memory.

[nevalizona]

Rewatched L*ser L*ve.... didn't think I could hate Tim more but alas here we are. The movie stinks. Like ngl the movie could have been genuinely not bad if it just figured itself out more, dropped dumb plots, and expanded on what we had. But since they didn't *blows raspberry* it stinks.

Like the first time I watched it, I fucking hated Tim but the second time? Oh brother! I despised him! I just don't get why they decided taking the approach they did for him and Lily's relationship was a good idea? There's literally NOTHING redeemable about him. I understand what they're trying to say blah blah blah. But Tim's a deadbeat. He mooches off of Lily. During the events of the movie I swear they cannot have one conversation where he doesn't like turn on her? I don't get why we're supposed to believe as an audience she would stay with him. Like sure they're "passionate" or whatever but like even then???? They show that she's unhappy with that part of their relationship too so I'm?!?!?!? Like sure Tim is "cute" or whatever but certainly not enough to where she'd want to stay with him for that aspect alone. Not to mention Lily's pretty. They never set it up that she's like an ugly bitch that should be glad someone like Tim is with her so, that's not it. Tim has no charm. He's gross.

Moving on from that for a moment, the whole Tim and Kilo subplot is like fucking terrible holy shit? Like I remember it being bad but seeing it again I'm just like Jesus Christ... Tim's a fucking monster no joke. Like the way he was constantly trying to intimidate Kilo and scare her is so.... but what's shitty is she wasn't letting him like get away with it until he took it to *that* next level and she seemed genuinely frightened by him? Like what a piece of shit (side note: Kilo is the best character, hands down.)

It's crazy to me how much worse Tim and the whole situation is the second time through. Like my God. I have never felt dread the way I did at Lily's birthday party... just that entire part my stomach was twisting. Either way, the movie sucks. It never had a true vision and let it's plot get convoluted with unnecessary background plots because the writer didn't know how to tie two massively big plots together. The movie was over-ambitious and somewhat lazy.

[thatgirlwhosawthelight]

Book Review: I've never been Unhappier- Shaheen Bhatt

Book Review: I’ve never been Unhappier- Shaheen Bhatt

Book: I’ve never been unhappier- Shaheen Bhatt

Rating: 4.5/5

Why I picked it up: This is actually a book I didn’t want to read in the start. Usually books like these sometimes trigger me, so I left it well alone, heard a bunch of people tell me they loved it and moved on. I’m a very emotionally stunted person by nature, but I am trying to get better, to be more attuned to my feelings, to…

[yandere-daze]

Horrortober Day 1

The first day of this challenge and I´m very motivated! Let´s hope it stays that way sfnlf

I´ve never written for Tori before so I´m sorry if this is slighty ooc! I just thought it might be fun to write for someone I haven´t before ^^

Prompt and challenge by @pastelbirb and @yandere-sins!

Link to my Horrortober masterlist here!

Day 1: Listen  --> “Listen to me!”

tw yandere, tw possessiveness, tw master/servant relationship, power imbalance, Tori calls you his slave once or twice, tw emotional manipulation

You were carefully balancing a tray stacked full with numerous cookies, cakes and other sweets as you walked through the vast halls of the Himemiya mansion. Briefly glancing at the grandfather clock you passed by, you noticed with a start that you were over 30 minutes late. Tori, the boy whose family you were working for, usually preferred to have his tea time at 4 pm and it was your duty to bring him everything he asked for every day.

You had made it a point to never be late, knowing just how angry the boy could get but today had been different. Your beloved partner had surprised you with a spontaneous visit during your working hours, since you hadn´t had the chance to meet with each other recently. Somehow the young Himemiya managed to always think of an extra chore for you when you were just about to leave on a date. If you didn´t know any better you would think he made you cancel all of your plans on purpose.

But yes, secretly meeting your beloved again for the first time since what had felt like forever had caused you to be behind in schedule with your duties and your palms were getting sweaty when you thought about what would happen once you met face to face with Tori. His mood must be very soured now that he had to wait longer for his beloved sweets. He could be quite temperamental and was infamous for childishly throwing tantrums when things didn´t go his way. You still remember the times when he would refuse to go to bed before you visited him to plant a goodnight-kiss on his forehead. You used to think it was strange for him to want to be so close to one of his so-called “slaves” but stopped questioning it a long time ago. It was better that way.

Lost in your thoughts, you suddenly found yourself in front of a door, the door to Tori´s room. It´s a place only you and his personal butler Yuzuru were allowed to enter. And speaking of the butler, the door in front of you opened as he walked out of the bedroom. He smiled softly as he saw you but there was a hint of irritation veiled behind the friendly expression.

“Ah there you finally are, y/n. The young master has been asking for you for quite a while now. He´s grown positively restless in your absence. Please don´t make it a habit to keep him waiting.”, he smiled once more at your frantic nodding, then disappeared into one of the many rooms of the mansion.

Tori has been waiting for you all this time? Sure, realistically speaking it had only been half an hour but you felt the anxiety bubble up within you. Knowing him, he must be very unhappy right now. Deciding to not waste anymore time, you knocked on the door before inviting yourself in.

What greeted you was the sight of Tori sitting on his bed, curled up in a blanket that he seemed to be clutching with considerable force. He was impatiently tapping his foot as he glanced at the clock hung on the opposite wall. As soon as he heard the sound of the door opening, his head whipped around and his eyes widened as a bright smile spread on his face. Then his smile dropped and he frowned angrily as if he just remembered he was supposed to me mad at you.

You sheepishly entered the room and set down the tray you were carrying on the desk beside the desk before turning around to face him. “How dare you keep me waiting, slave? You´re supposed to be here the moment I call for you!”, Tori whined quite angrily. “I´m very sorry, young master. Something I had to took care of came up”, you shamefully lied as you bowed your head in front of him. You couldn´t possibly tell him that instead of doing your work you spent your time talking to your sweetheart.

“….you´re lying to me, aren´t you?”, he whispered as his hand shook in what you presumed to be held-back rage. He looked like he was trying to force himself to be calm. “I´m not sure what you mean? Know that I would never lie to you, young master.” Another lie. And Tori must have caught it as well as he let out an angry yell, shaking off the blanket from around his shoulders with considerable force as he rushed forward to wrap his arms around you, his head pressed against your chest.

“Listen to me, slave!”, he whined and tightened his grip on you as you shivered. “I saw you. I was sitting by the window, waiting for you all this time when I saw you with that scum! How dare they think that they´re allowed to have even a moment of your time? Don´t they know that you belong to me? I´m your master, so you´re mine and mine alone! I can have you whenever I want and how long I want! They´re so utterly insignificant! ….so why would you choose their company over mine? What do they have that I don´t?! Tell me!!”, by the end of his tirade Tori was sobbing uncontrollably as he pounded his fists against your chest with every word he spoke. You couldn´t believe what he had just said, couldn´t even begin to comprehend it. He had seen your secret meetup and disapproved of it, that much you could understand but the rest? You didn´t feel right about him treating you like you were a possession.

“Young master, I´m sorry but I don’t belong to anyone.” That seemed to be enough to shake him because he took a sharp intake of breath, resting his hands for a moment as he looks down. Then after a few seconds he raises his head again to meet your gaze head on. His grip on you tightens dramatically as he starts sobbing again, looking at you with tearful eyes.

“But, but you´re my servant! You´ve been with me for so long, don´t you care about me at all? Am I just some kid you have to deal with?”, the tears kept rolling and despite the sinking feeling in your stomach you began to feel sorry for him. How could you not when he was pouring his heart out to you like this?  “Y/n, I don’t want to ever be away from you. I really really like you, so why do you hate me? Do you hate being around me so much?” You awkwardly pat his head to help him calm down. “Of course I don´t hate you, I couldn´t…”, you trail of. “Really? Does that mean you will stay with me?”, Tori immediately perks up at very prospect and you don´t have the heart to tell him no after he had just begun feeling better so you hesitantly nodded your head.

“Hm, you better not be lying this time. Maybe I´ll accept your apology if you kneel down in front of me”, he huffed as he turned his head but you knew he wasn´t serious anymore. Crisis averted it seems. “Well, then we should better make up the time we were away from each other, all right? You should be honored to eat cake together with your master, understood, slave?” Seeing as he was back to his usual demeanor, you felt yourself relax as you cut up the cakes for you both to try. The rest of the day went pretty unremarkably. Tori personally excused you for all your other duties that day so you two can spend more time together. You two eat cake and talk as if nothing happened, only being interrupted once when Yuzuru steps into the room to refill the tea.

Turning around to face the butler, Tori spoke up, the air suddenly very serious. “Has the issue been dealt with?”, he asks, a dark look on his face. “They won´t be causing any more problems anytime soon, young master.”, Yuzuru answered dutifully as he refilled both of your cups. “You know just how meticulous I am.”, he finishes with an eerie smile then leaves the room.

“What was that all about?”, you ask slightly concerned as you lean forward a bit. Tori cheerfully takes a sip from his cup before answering, an oddly satisfied look on his face.

“Don´t worry about that. You won´t have to bother with trash like them anymore. Now we can truly be together forever.”

[justice4canyonmoon]

I don't know if you're comfortable with this, but could you write something about fingering Harry for the first time and he really likes it and is moaning like crazy?

I originally was going to try and make this really short, but sub! harry is my favorite Harry, so it turned into a full on one-shot! I hope this is good for you!

Warnings: smut!!!! anal fingering (m receiving), oral sex (m receiving), sub! harry

WC: 1.5k

You being dominant wasn’t anything new. Whenever one of yours and Harry’s sexual escapades ended in you taking control, you both absolutely loved it. You spanked him, tied him up, edged him, called him a dirty whore, and rode him until he cried. But there was still something the two of you had never tried before.

Harry had been curious about this for a long time. One of his friends talked about how much he loved being pegged, and Harry began to wonder if he would like the feeling. He did a little research into it, even googling about male sex toys, but the strap-ons and butt plugs seemed a little too scary to him yet. He figured he should probably see if he actually liked the feeling first before he bought any of those things.

Harry brought up the topic at dinner one night. The two of you had a natural lull in conversation, and he worked up the courage to mention it.

“Darlin’, I’ve got somethin’ I need t’ ask y’.”

You put your fork down and looked at him expectantly, not totally sure where he was going with this.

He swallowed, “Have y’ ever, ehm, pegged someone? Or enjoyed doin’ it?”

You had honestly secretly been hoping he’d ask this for a while. You wanted him to be the one to bring it up so that you knew he was comfortable with the idea.

“Yes, I have. You want me to do it to you?”

“Well, sort of,” he explained, “I dunno how ready I am f’ the whole shebang since ‘ve never done it before, but I was thinkin’ maybe y’ could finger me? Just to see how it feels?”

You smiled, “Sure, baby. We can give it a try.”

Harry returned your smile, his cheeks turning a soft shade of crimson as he returned to eating the shrimp scampi you two had cooked together.

A few days later, you got the chance to try it. You could tell he was nervous, so you took your time stripping him down and pressing sweet, reassuring kisses to his lips. You had him lay on the bed and you followed, straddling his waist and continuing to kiss him, hoping to try and quell some of his nerves. You proved unsuccessful, however; when you pulled back and grabbed the lube, you could see him trembling. You faltered, not wanting to rush into things if he wasn’t ready.

“Are you sure you want this, Harry?” you asked softly.

He looked up at you, eyes slightly wide, “Y-yeah. ‘M sure. Jus’ a bit nervous, ‘s all.”

“Okay, but if you change your mind at any time, tell me. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” you told him.

“I will, promise,” he replied.

Happy with his response, you leaned down and kissed his forehead before trailing light kisses down his neck and chest. You weren’t planning on touching his nipples at all, but when you saw how hard they were, you took one into your mouth and tugged gently. He whimpered as you pinched its twin, rolling the nub between your fingers. You smirked, licking both of his nipples to soothe the pain before continuing your descent, pressing sloppy kisses to his abdomen until you reached his cock. You licked at the head, relishing in the whine that fell from his lips.

“Gonna suck your cock for a little to make sure you’re nice and relaxed. That sound good, honey?” you murmured.

He nodded vigorously, but a squeeze to his thigh reminded him to answer verbally, “Y-yes. Sounds s’ good.”

“That’s my good boy,” you whispered, before pushing just the head of his cock between your lips.

He moaned softly, threading his fingers into your hair; though he tugged, he knew better than to try and make you take more. The only time he’d tried that, you’d spanked him so hard he couldn’t sit the next day. You smirked at the sound, teasingly swirling your tongue around the tip, collecting the pre-cum that had begun to leak out. Soon, you took a little bit more, sinking about halfway down on his cock. You looked up at his face, but were unhappy when you saw that his eyes were squeezed shut.

You squeezed his thigh again and pulled off of his cock, “Eyes open. Want you to look at me while I’m making you feel good.”

His eyes snapped open, his forest green eyes meeting yours, “‘M sorry. I’ll keep ‘em open, promise.”

“That’s a good boy,” you crooned.

Satisfied, you swiftly took him back in your mouth, wanting to make him both as comfortable and as turned on as possible before you pushed your fingers into him. You could hear desperate whines from above you as your nose brushed his pelvis, and you thought that now might be the best time, so he didn’t cum before you even got a chance to get started.

You pulled off of him again and asked, “Are you ready, baby?”

“‘M ready,” he confirmed.

Though you could tell he was still a bit nervous, he was definitely more relaxed than before, which was a good sign. You pulled back slightly to lube up your fingers, then leaned back in and licked a stripe up his cock. You took him back into your mouth, and he gasped softly when he felt your lube-covered finger circling his rim. You looked up at him, and he nodded at you, giving you the go-ahead. So, you slowly and gently pushed your index finger inside of him. You expected him to tell you it hurt, tense up, or maybe let out some soft noises of pleasure.

You didn’t expect the guttural moan that he released.

You smirked to yourself around his cock. He fucking loved it. You thought he would, but hearing it made satisfaction hum through your veins.

“F-fuck, b-baby. It feels s’ fuckin good. P-please move,” he begged.

With his consent, you moved your finger inside of him, relishing in the breathy moans he was making. His eyes had screwed shut again, though, and you couldn’t have that. You stilled your finger inside of him and pulled off of his cock again.

“Didn’t I tell you to keep your eyes open?”

Immediately, his eyes opened again, “Fuck, ‘m sorry. Jus’ felt s’ good, I couldn’t help m’self. Promise I’ll keep ‘em open, jus’ please don’ stop. Please.”

You maintained steady eye contact as you crooked your finger inside of him. He moaned loudly again, but managed to keep his eyes open. You didn’t take him back into your mouth, now knowing how much he enjoyed taking your fingers.

“Gonna add another finger, is that okay, baby?”

He nodded wildly, “Please, please, please!”

You chuckled softly, “My baby boy is a little eager now, isn’t he?”

You wanted to tease him a little bit, but decided to leave that for next time. This was new for him, and you didn’t want to overwhelm him. So, you relented and pushed your middle finger in to join your pointer, and he squeaked in pleasure. His hips ground down onto your fingers, almost of their own accord, as he cried out. You pumped your fingers in and out of him, gentle praises falling from your lips as he took you. When you crooked both of your fingers inside of him again, a stream of curses escaped his lips. If his sugary sweet moans didn’t tell you how much he was enjoying this, the way his hole was clenching around your fingers did. His cock was throbbing, and you could tell that he was close as his moans turned into pants.

“S’ c-close. P-please, may I c-cum? Need t-to s’ bad,” Harry begged, confirming your suspicions.

You nodded, bringing your free hand up to tug at his cock, “Go ahead, my love. You’ve been such a good boy, you earned it.”

That’s all it took for him to cum. His release coated your hand as he moaned your name, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. You stroked his cock through his high, milking every drop.

“That’s my good boy. Look so pretty when you cum for me, Harry,” you praised, smirking at the keening sound he released at your words.

When he came down from his orgasm, you slowly removed your fingers from his hole. He whimpered softly at the newfound emptiness, already missing your fingers. You smiled and gently brushed some stray curls from his forehead, peppering sweet kisses all over his face.

“Well, guess I liked it,” Harry remarked with a dopey smile on his face.

You giggled, “Guess so. Glad you did, I’ve honestly wanted to do this with you for a while. Wanted you to bring it up, though, so I knew you’d be comfortable with it.”

“‘M definitely a bit more than ‘comfortable,’ love,” he murmured, sounding exhausted.

But then, he looked up at you with wide eyes, “‘Y didn’ cum yet, baby.”

“I can take care of it myself, Har. Know I tired you out,” you replied.

He shook his head stubbornly, “No. If ‘m here, ‘m making y’ cum. Sit on my face, love.”

And you couldn’t find it in yourself to refuse.

[siriusmydeer]

breakup with your girlfriend, i’m bored.

james potter x fem!reader, platonic!remus lupin x reader, james potter x lily evans

summary: james’ journey onto finding love; just not with you.

word count: 1.9k

warnings: unrequited love, angst, swearing, crying, mentions of food, self doubt/insecurity, pining, mentions of murder, mentions of marriage and kids

— 0:00

‘You got me some type of way

Ain't used to feelin' this way

I do not know what to say

“so, mates, i think m’finally getting somewhere with lils!” the tone of excitement thickly lacing the bespectacled boys words. “m’sure of it.” he continued, a bit of confusion in his words but still the same amount of excitement as before.

his brows were furrowed and he picked at the skin of his fingernails trying to relieve himself, further wringing his hands a few times before looking at his friends for their input.

“m’so— m’so happy for you, prongs. really, that’s great.” your voice faltering as you continued to speak, trying to scoundrel up a tone of excitement that would’ve played off well enough. instead all you were feeling stone cold truth of dejection.

But I know I shouldn't think about it

Took one fuckin' look at your face

Now I wanna know how you taste

Usually don't give it away

But you know I'm out here thinkin' 'bout it’

a fake smile plastered your face, trying to push back the tears that wanted to desperately prick at your eyes. you tried to further block them from escaping your waterline as you hear the boy jabber close to every single day about the red head he had been continuously fawning over.

the day went subsequently normal; potions, transfiguration, break period, plan pranks and dinner. but unfortunately for you, you didn’t have the privilege to share a messy dormitory with the four other boys leaving their conversations and discussions open about you and more your feelings.

“d’you think y/n was a bit off today?” peter asked abruptly from the place he sat on the oak wood floor, catching the attention of the three other boys who were seated on their separate twin beds. furthering to retain all memories of you from that day attempting to identify where you might’ve seemed ‘off.’

‘Then I realize she's right there

And I'm at home like, "Damn, this ain't fair"

Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored

“maybe a lunch a bit, she looked a little melancholy, i guess.” sirius answered this time, recalling the memory of you speaking in a very disconsolate tone. “y’think it’s anything major, or just stress?” he questioned again, beginning to worry about his close friend.

“dunno, i don’t think so.” the lycanthrope added to the conversation. he recalled james’ new confession about the red headed girl, and your extremely unhappy expressions following; of course noticing a bit at the time when it was occurring but just assuming you had a bad day with evan rosier pestering you for a date.

maybe... maybe she— but they’re best friends? his thoughts were extremely close to scrambled, remus was an observer, he was clever and sharp-witted; but this, he couldn’t figure out.

You could hit it in the mornin'

Yeah, yeah, like it's yours

I know it ain't right

“oi, y/n!” a deep voice called in the distance, putting your light jog to a stop in the middle of the courtyard leaving you to stand in the grass. swiftly turning around you were met with the taller fawn-haired boy, who looked tremendously determined.

“i’ve, uh, ‘ve got to ask you something, and it may seem foolish, but i think i just still ask you.” his voice hurried like his panting breaths from running across the school to find you, asking around the library and your dorm mates.

“yeah, moons, sure, anything.” affirming the boy who looked a bit confused, and worried but you didn’t know if it was for his sake or yours.

he grabbed your wrist in his palm pulling you on the prickly grass over to someone more private like to speak with you. “d’you— d’you like prongs? more than friendly...” the boy sputtered, further acknowledging your blown eyes like someone had just committed murder in-front of you.

But I don't care

Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored’

“i— uhm, well, that’s a bit— why d’you think— remus, what the fuck!” your words taking a halt every few seconds with a recurrent sputter trying to figure out where the question had even came from, or how he even knew.

“i saw— i saw the way you acted at lunch the other day. i jus’ wanted to know if it’s true.” he asserted, no present lingering touches of judgement in his tone.

remus knew what it was like to be judged, so whenever you had the urge to jabber out all of your problems he was the boy you had always ran too first. knowingly, or not. but he felt particularly disappointed in himself that you hadn’t trusted him with this potential secret.

‘This shit always happen to me (Yeah)

Why can't we just play for keeps?

Practically on my knees

“yeah— i do.” you admitted with a breath, guilt taking a pang at your heart. and anger taking a swig at your brain; how could you be so fucking stupid.

“remus, but you can’t— you can’t tell him, or anything.” your tone was hushed, and only meant for remus’ ears. feeling a tinge of embarrassment warm onto your cheeks, knowing someone you loved clearly didn’t reciprocate those feelings.

“i swear, i won’t. but m’here for you, i don’t want you feeling like you can’t tell me anything.” his words soft, and his tone genuine. why couldn’t you have fallen for someone like him? but instead, you crush on someone who was in love with someone else.

But I know I shouldn't think about it

You know what you're doin' to me

You're singin' my songs in the streets, yeah, yeah

Actin' all innocent, please

“c’mon, y/n.” he beckoned you to follow him, resting his arm on the curvature of your shoulder feeling his side press against your smaller one and guiding you to transfiguration with him.

why? why did you have to be so damn foolish? because it was her, with her beautiful red locks, her perfect maroon lipstick, her exceedingly amazing grades, her ability to be silly for a moment and loosen up. why couldn’t you be her? why couldn’t you have what she has.

it’s because it’s simple; you weren’t lily evans and you were never going to be.

When I know you out here thinkin' 'bout it

Then you realize she's right there

And you're at home like, "Damn, she can't compare"’

“guys! guys! she said yes!” james announced whilst scuttling across the mahogany floor of the common room. his actions at a halt flopping his body over the scarlet-red couch and a grin on his lips.

“who said what?” sirius muttered, glancing up from the map for a moment before looking back down in ascertainment.

“lily-pad! i asked her on a date and she was like, ‘yeah, fine, potter. but if you’re late i’ll kill you.’ just like that!” he pretended to play out the conversation for a moment, his thrilled movements and inflection almost animated from how happy he felt.

‘Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored

You could hit it in the mornin'

Yeah, yeah, like it's yours

I know it ain't right’

remus briefly glanced at you, concern swirling in his hazel irises, meanwhile, your eyes widened for a moment. you plastered yet another fake grin onto your lips, about to congratulate your crush on winning a date with his all time infatuation.

“prongs! oh my merlin, that’s amazing, i’m so happy for you!” putting on the best impression of exhilaration for your best friend, the act only remus could piece together and break apart.

“no way! prongs, mate, i knew you could do it!” sirius spoke, his tone fein for his best friend who had been in a pinning coma for the last few years.

‘But I don't care

Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored

With your girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend’

the boys continued to congratulate the boy, remus only giving him a nod and a smile. the marauders paying no mind to it and instead james merrily talking about the red head; his red head.

you weren’t his, and you never would be.

yet another realization struck you, the urge and need to move on present in your nervous system almost begging you to find someone else and to hide away from all the pain that could swallow you whole.

‘With your girlfriend

With your girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend

You could say I'm hatin' if you want to

But I only hate on her 'cause I want you’

you were now sat on the smooth ivory bedding that perfectly hugged your bed, remus’ body right beside yours. except you weren’t comfortable, you wanted to cry a valley of tears that could’ve lasted a life time.

“why is it her? why couldn’t he want me, am i not enough?” you spoke through broken sobs, feeling remus’ agile hands rub up and down the column of your back.

“you’re enough, y/n/n. he’s a bloody git for not seeing that.” remus spoke, sponging a kiss on your hairline. he felt the wet tears graze his shoulder, slightly contracting at the cold feeling but paying no mind to them as he comforted you.

‘Say I'm trippin' if you feel like

But you without me ain't right

You could call me crazy 'cause I want you

And I never even ever fuckin' met you

Say I'm trippin' and it ain't right

But you without me ain't nice’

“m’the bloody git! i fell in love with m’best friend who’s in love with someone else! next thing you know i’m accidentally setting dumbledores beard on fire, and accidentally spawning voldemort for christ’s sake!” your words mumbled and obstruct from the tears that had over come you.

you whipped your face free from tears for a moment, basically scrubbing the black colour of your mascara down your cheeks. “you’re not alone, you know? m’right here.” his tone, yet again, sincere.

you felt undeserving of his coddling, that your messy puppy love was so little compared to his issues. “i can tell your belittling your problems right now, you’re aloud to be upset.” he whispered, trying to assure you all he could, whilst disrupting you from your senile thoughts.

‘Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored

You could hit it in the mornin'

Yeah, yeah, like it's yours

I know it ain't right

But I don't care’

“merlin, she’s fantastic.” the brunette finished his third speech of the day on how ‘amazing’ lily is. yeah as if him pining after her wasnt enough, then what the hell was this?

the devil poking at you for cheating on your herbology test in first year, the time you accidentally tripped peter when rushing to potions, maybe it was the time you put belching power in sirius’ drink everyday for a week because he said you had a flat arse?

what the hell did you do to deserve this incessant torture that had been inflicted upon you. we’re you being dramatic? probably. but the boy you were quite literally in love with could not stop talking about how he wanted to ask another female to be with him, companionship, life, marriage, children. he wanted everything with her.

‘Break up with your girlfriend

Yeah, yeah, 'cause I'm bored

With your girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend, baby, girlfriend

With your girlfriend’

but then again it was also extremely simple.

he just simply didn’t want you.

he wanted lily fucking evans.

‘With your girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend, girlfriend

With your girlfriend’

taglist: @fathermarty @kittykylax @terr0rizer @aspiringsloth20 @maddoxsmythologicalmind @amourtentiaa @dear-luna @famdomhideout @hufflepogue

if your username is crossed out that means you gave me the wrong username or your settings for public display tags are off!

[lovecolibri]

I think they would have done a good job not relising any interviews with kristen arielle because in my opinion they ruined the mood for a lot of people. I was waiting for the b/t breakup since they got together, now will have it, but because he cheated and HAS feelings for lucy, like how to destroy a character. We could ve the excitement we had when we found out about the synopsis of 5x03, but now knowing that after the breakup he will throw himself in lucy's arms ruined everything for me

I made another post about the narrative satisfaction of the break up here, but yeah, its frustrating that something we have all been SO looking forward to has been so ruined.

And you're absolutely correct about the interviews. If they hadn't made their stance pretty darn clear, fandom would have done the work it always does and made all the excuses for why this makes sense for the character. They're doing it with this too, and while yeah, the arguments can be made, some really good arguments in fact, it doesn't change the fact that we know KR has specifically said that we're not interpreting things how she intended, and she's brushed past the cheating and is talking about how she intends, and how this b/l relationship is being promoted, as something fun, and flirty that makes unhappy-in-his-relationship Buck feel alive again, NOT as something that spiraling and clinging to an unhappy relationship because he doesn't feel like he deserves better Buck does as a way of self-harm and continuing in a downward spiral. This is being promoted as something good and fun and enjoyable for him. It may turn out differently but for right now this is what we are being told to expect, and what we are being told is happening.

And it's no wonder all the Facebook mom's who are also probably in or have been in relationships where their husband/partner is distant/cheats because he's just "unhappy" and found something that made him feel alive again are SO riled up about this arc and hate it so much. Buck is supposed to be the loyal, heart of gold, hunk of a man who is great with kids, that they project onto the female love interests for. But making him a cheater? They aren't going to go for that, not matter WHAT the excuse, and they are going to HATE the women he cheats with, with a passion we've never seen, even from the fans who very much hated and were tired of tay kay.

And giving interviews saying fans are imagining things between Buck and Eddie and then giving Buck a partner with a similar entrance and similarly framed scenes to him and Eddie and calling her "best pals with sexual tension" and teas that they are going to tease and flirt on the job and she's going to be there to help Buck through a difficult emotions time, is an INCREDIBLE slap in the face. Had they just shut up about it they might have flown this plot under the radar, people would have gotten upset and then forgotten about it, and we could have moved on, but them giving continuous interviews letting everyone know how much she was going to be involved in the show after everyone was excited to FINALLY have our mains back, and insulting Buddie fans in one breath, then turning around and praising and hyping up the "basically an Eddie character but a lady this time" relationship with in the next really rubbed people the wrong way. And the backlash about the episode because of it is...very telling. Now we just have to wait and see if they take these 3 weeks to do anything about it.

[winterfluffs]

Santa Isn’t Real.....Right?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Summary: Someone has told your daughter that Santa isn’t real. Your husband is not too pleased. 

Warnings: Mostly fluff. A couple of swear words. Tiiiiiiiniest bit of implied smut.

Word count: 2.4k

Author’s notes: Thank you all so much to the people who have liked or reblogged the first story that was posted (I have now figured out how to make a cut!). It really means a lot!  This drabble, one-shot - whatever you’d like to call it was so much fun to write; just in time for Christmas! I hope you all like it as well. Also, it is a LONG one. 

Merry Christmas, everyone! Happy Holidays!

(* “Honey, go to bed.”)

“Who told my kid that Santa isn’t real?!” A voice boomed through the halls, heavy footsteps quickly stomping through the quiet compound. 

“Shit. Hide.” Clint Barton's eyes widened as he looked around at the people spread out in the living room. The heavy footsteps came quicker causing everyone in the room to run back to their rooms fear of what was going to happen.

----

 “Daddy!” A tiny teary voice cried out from the hallway. 

Bucky Barnes groggily opened his eyes, his ears immediately picking up on the soft crying. “Whsm?” He grumbled before sitting up and rubbing at his tired eyes. It was only 2 A.M. and he had just gotten to sleep an hour and a half ago. 

“Buck?” He felt you stir, your hand reaching out to pull his body back to yours.

“Daddy.” The soft crying was closer, coming from the doorway of yours and his bedroom.

“Belley?” you mumbled sitting up next to Bucky. A yawn escaped both your lips as your sniffling four-year-old daughter crawled up the bed. “Honey, what’s wrong?” 

“Daddy.” Isabelle looked at her father with tear filled blue eyes, her bottom lip quivering as Bucky wrapped his arms around her. 

“It’s okay, baby. Daddy’s here.” He cooed sweetly in her ear his vibranium hand making slow comforting circles on her back. 

You watched as Bucky whispered sweet words in your daughter’s ear in an attempt to calm her down from whatever had shaken her; your heart ready to burst with love at the sight. 

“Belley, tell daddy what’s wrong.” He cradled her close, rocking her in a comforting sway. 

“Santa isn’t real!” the little girl sobbed, her tiny hands wrapping around her father’s neck while she cried into his chest. 

Bucky's jaw clenched as he looked at you with slight worry. James Barnes had always been beautiful to you; but right now, seeing his jaw clench and already knowing what was going through his mind, he was breathtaking. He was in protector mode – a way he had always been with you but became even more fierce when your daughter was born. The day he found out you were pregnant he swore no one would ever hurt his little girl. Ever. And if someone did, he would make them pay.

“Baby, what do you mean Santa isn’t real? Of course Santa is real.” You joined your other half in trying to soothe your daughter’s tears.

“No! Santa isn’t real!” she spat back at you before clinging back onto her father. 

Your mind went back to the day you both found out you were expecting. Bucky knew, without a doubt, the baby would be a girl; his princess, a complete daddy’s girl, the spitting image of the dark-haired, blue-eyed man that had stolen your heart.

 And she was. 

From the moment Isabelle Marie Barnes made her entrance in this world she had her father wrapped around her little fingers. Everything Bucky did was for you and your little miracle. All the late nights staying up to finish a report, the even later nights spent training, his reluctance to do missions that would take him away from home for too long – it all was for you and your baby. 

Bucky refused to be a dad that wouldn’t be there for his child, and to yours and Bucky's surprise, the rest of the team had agreed as well. Steve and Tony especially. 

You blinked away the tears that were forming in your eyes, shaking off the sudden emotions to hormonal changes due to your being six-and-a-half-months pregnant with your second child.

“Baby, you need to tell me what happened.” Bucky’s jaw twitched again. You saw the anger forming in his eyes and placed a loving hand on his arm, squeezing it slightly. He looked at you, his resolve coming undone as he met your gaze. “Honey, Santa is very real. How else do you think you get presents on Christmas Eve?” he spoke quietly, deep blue eyes looking into even deeper bluer eyes.

 Isabelle stayed quiet yet looked between you and her dad. “Sweetheart, did you have a bad dream?” you moved her long tangled dark hair away from her face. She looked so much like her father your heart ached. 

Isabelle shook her head pouting while doing so.

“It’s okay, baby. You can tell mommy and daddy what happened. We won’t get mad.” You smiled at her yet gave your husband a stern look. The super soldier rolled his eyes then kissed your little girl’s hair, his head resting on top of hers. “Right, daddy?” 

Bucky shot you a look then sighed heavily. “Mommy and daddy won’t get mad, sweetheart. We promise.”

Feeling slightly better at your admission, Isabelle sat down on her father’s lap, her tiny fingers running along Bucky’s vibranium arm. “I was in my room when I heard a noise.”

“Honey, that was just daddy going to bed.” Bucky let out a loud laugh, the tension instantly gone from his face.

“Daddy, let me finish.” She looked back at him with a stern look. The same look you always gave him whenever he was teetering the thin line between being stupid and wanting to sleep on the couch. 

“Sorry.” You both hid a smile; you still in awe at how formal your child was at the age of four. Maybe it was the enhanced serum in her veins, or maybe it was just your thickheaded stubbornness, but your daughter was an absolute force to reckon with. So much so that she even gave Black Widow a run for her money. 

 “I heard a noise and went out to see what it was.” She sniffed, her head resting against Bucky’s chest.

 “Honey, you know you should have been in bed.” You sighed suddenly feeling exhausted.

“Mommy. You promised.” Her dark blue eyes landed on you.

“Yeah, mommy.” Bucky smirked giving you a playful look. You rolled your eyes yet couldn’t help but smile as well.

“I went out in the living room and saw someone taking presents from the tree! I asked if he was Santa and the man said that Santa wasn’t real.” Isabelle’s bottom lip quivered causing your heart to ache.

Bucky’s face had gone hard. The twitch in his jaw told you everything you needed to know. 

“Honey, Santa is most definitely real. Right, daddy?” you urged your husband to smile, pleading with him not to say anything. 

“Yeah, baby. Santa’s real.” He spoke lowly, his eyes focusing on the open door.

 “How do you know, daddy?” Isabelle looked up hope filling her pretty eyes.

“Oh, I never told you before?” he snapped out of his trance and looked down at his daughter.

“No! Tell me what! Daddy!” she bounced in his lap; her previous worries quickly turned into curiosity.  

“I’m going to tell you but you have to promise you won’t tell anyone.” He whispered.

“Not even mommy?” her eyes widened.

 “Mommy already knows.” He gave you a smile as you rested your head on his shoulder. 

“What I’m about to tell you is very important. You have to promise me you won’t tell a single word to anyone.” 

“Not Uncle Steve?”

“Not Uncle Steve.”

“Not even Aunt Tasha?!”

“Not even Aunt Natasha.”

Isabelle looked up to face her father, the look of awe and wonder etched on her brow made Bucky almost break. He loved nothing more in his life than you, your daughter, and the little one growing inside of you; his heart clenched at the thought of any of you ever being unhappy. 

“Okay, daddy.” Isabelle nodded her head seriously. 

Your husband kissed you on the top of your head with a smile before turning back to your daughter. “I know Santa is real because I’ve seen him myself.” He whispered causing Isabelle to gasp out loud. 

“You…..ve seen Santa.” She whispered, her little mind spinning with the newly found news.

“Sure have. One Christmas Eve I was coming home late from work, even later than it is right now, and when I opened the door, there was a big man in a red suit with a long white beard. He had the biggest sack of presents I have ever seen. I tried to sneak away but he caught me.” Bucky’s eyes widened to match his daughter’s, her little body clinging to his every word.

“What happened next?”

“He looked at me and said, ‘James Barnes, I know what you seek in life, what you have always sought out. By midday today you will have found what you are looking for.’ And then with a smile and a wink, he flew up the chimney.” 

“Wowwwwww!” Isabelle gaped in disbelief. Her daddy! And Santa Claus! Clearly Santa was real because daddy knew everything and she also knew that daddy would never lie to her. Of course Santa was real! There was just one thing still bothering her. “Dad, what did Santa mean when he said all that weird stuff to you?”

“He meant that I would find mommy. He gave me your mommy. And then he gave me you. My best girls.” 

You looked up to find him beaming at the both of you. Your heart burst with love for him and your little family. Your one true love and happiness.

“I think it’s time we all get back to bed. We don’t want to miss Santa!” You gasped suddenly. “I think I hear footprints on the roof!”

“Oh no, mommy!” your little one gasped and flew off the bed racing down the hall to her bedroom. 

“I love you, Barnes. Thank you for always taking such good care of us.” You whispered your eyes meeting your husband’s.

“I love you, doll. More than you both will ever know.” He smiled and kissed you gently. “Let’s go make sure she’s actually in bed.” He laughed while wrapping his arm around your waist and hugging you close as you walked to your daughter’s room.

----

“Night, munchkin. Olive you.” Bucky kissed his daughter’s forehead then pulled away with a smile. 

“Olive you, daddy.” Isabelle giggled while hugging her favorite stuffed animal to her. 

“Tuck the little one in and I’ll meet you back in bed. I have something to finish first but I’ll meet you straight back there.” 

“Babe, you aren’t going to do something stupid.” You gave him a look. That same look your four-year-old gave him just a little while ago. When your husband refused to meet your eye, you tried again. “James.” His cool blue eyes stared back into yours, a hint of threat still clouding his vision as he quietly cursed himself for inability to hide his emotions from you. “Baby, please.” 

Bucky sighed then nodded. He hated to love when you used his first name to get him to calm down. No one else had that power over him, and there was absolutely NO ONE else allowed to call him by his first name other than you. And maybe Santa, if Isabelle was asking. 

“Thank you.” You mouthed before turning to your little one. “Night, baby.” You kissed your daughter’s head with a tired smile. It was just past 3 A.M. and you wanted nothing more than to slip back into your warm bed, your arms around your husband as the both of you drifted off to sleep. “I love you, kiddo. Get some sleep.” 

“I love you. Night, mommy.” She yawned sleepily. You quietly shut the door and went to turn back to your bedroom. You were halfway down the hall when you knew something wasn’t right. And then you heard the yelling. You swore under your breath and ran to the main living room, hoping you would be able to stop your husband before it was too late.

----

“Who told my kid that Santa isn’t real?!” Bucky Barnes’s deep voice boomed through the quiet compound, his footsteps heavy and quick.

 “Shit, shit, shit!” Clint swore as he tripped over himself as he tried to reach his room before he was caught. 

“If I find out –“ Bucky stopped himself mid-sentence his eyes sweeping over every inch of the room. “Barton, if it was you - so help me God! You had better run for your life!” 

“Bucky! *Дорогая, иди спать. [ Dorogaya, idti spat’].”

Bucky turned to face the voice that had just spoken out. A surprised look overtook him for a moment before he started to laugh. “Since when do you know Russian?” he smiled and walked over to you, his previous mission already forgotten as he slipped his arms around your waist.

“Since I married a really sexy Russian Sergeant. Had to know all those dirty words he was moaning in bed.”

“I’m from New York.” He moaned against your lips, pulling your body closer his striking blue eyes staring into your own. 

“Still moan dirty Russian things in bed.” You smile and bring your lips to his. Bucky held you there loving the feeling of how close you two are. “I love you, Sergeant Barnes.”

“I love you, Mrs. Barnes.” He smiled while hugging you close. “Let’s get to bed. Don’t want to be awake for when Santa comes.”

“I’ll be right there.” You kissed your husband and patted his butt with a smile as he walked off. You went around turning out the lights stopping at the beautifully lit tree when you heard a door creak.

“He’s gone, Barton. You can come out now.” You called out into the darkness with a laugh. “You owe me.”

“Oh, I’m not Clint, Mrs. Barnes,” a voice replied with a chuckle in their voice. “But I am sure he will still say thank you anyway.” The voice chuckled again; this time louder, deeper causing your eyes to widen. 

You hurried down the hall, trying your best to keep quiet until you reached your room.  

“Babe, what are you doing?” Bucky sleepily looked at you as you ran into the room and dashed under the covers.

“I think Santa is in our living room.” You whispered into the dark. You felt your husband chuckle, his body warm and inviting as he pulled you in closer.

“Get some sleep. It’s been a long day and our little one will have us up in only a few hours.” He yawned cuddling into your body.

‘Maybe I am going crazy.’ You shook your head with a smile as your eyes slowly began to close. Just before you drifted off you whispered a goodnight to Santa almost feeling silly to be saying the words out loud. 

Just then you heard a woosh and with a small chuckle a voice said, “To all a good night!”