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#i unno man
luck-and-larceny · 2 months
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protectorcraft · 1 month
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in other news, chapter nine of abcs fic is just about finished. finally. thank fuck.
not going to post it until i get some sleep because i need to review it to squeeze out any potential inconsistencies, but after that i am posting it and freeing myself from this hell chapter. it was extremely unfun to write and if it wasn't necessary i wouldn't have written it at all. but it's here now.
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oatsynalliums · 10 months
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So like, steven
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endl3ssc0nsumption · 11 months
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heres sum more swap au :D
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themostsanebug · 7 months
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yall think itd be a good idea for me to steal an alcoholic baja blast before i go to my moms next
im curious
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thetisming · 28 days
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ive been like. weirdly emotional lately
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buttercup-barf · 1 year
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Twinsomnia as the Christmas ghosts
Kid ghost of Christmas past
Girl ghost of Christmas present
Boy ghost of Christmas yet to come
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I need to get some scatter brushes on my puter... I can't even do all my snowy sparkly nonsense that I love so much! Nevertheless, here they are.
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squirrelpatties · 1 year
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Dancing with my gnome all alone 💫 💫
pepstavo color thing that got silly, comes in colored and black lines, yaoi flavor or yuri flavor 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈
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tenshindon · 2 years
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i know we aint fam like we used to be but im glad you guys still send me asks despite me being virtually dead on this account :)
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saintedbythestorm · 1 year
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Food stores: oh we couldn't possibly lower the price! In fact, we must increase it cause how else will our stores survive? Woe is us.
Food stores today: yeah so eh... we heard another chain lowered their prices from the normal ones.. maybe we didn't need that increase...
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seahdalune · 1 year
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Whats your opinion on marks man *autism eyes*
the other funny texan man
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aratinatophat · 2 years
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Nylon my baby <3333
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the-mighty-nappa · 1 year
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Ah. It’s one of those unavoidable nights where you question everything. Living in a city sucks cause you can’t just take a stroll to look at stars and clear your head during these moments.
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toxicanonymity · 10 months
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rat in a cage.
1.2k, m!ghostface x f!reader | slasher master
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A/N: This is NOT the Every Inch ghostface/universe. This is a completely standalone one shot. SUMMARY: Ghostface is pursuing you. When you both get trapped in a lab on campus, you make a temporary truce. WARNINGS: I8+ Dubcon P in V, cockwarming, degradation, choking, creampie, lab rats in the building, huddling for warmth lmaoo, reader can sit on him and be partially lifted.
Before you realized you were both trapped in the building, you got into a scuffle and caused his knife to fall down a drain in the floor. He got on top of you, pinned you with his weight, and choked you, but it wasn't a choke to kill. His gloved hand was applying just enough pressure in just the right places to feel good. That's when it hit you that he didn't want to kill you. He could've snapped you like a twig from that position if he wanted.
You smiled, and he released your throat.
“Mm,” you sighed. “take off your mask if ya wanna kiss me that bad.”
Ghostface tilted his head and looked at you. The voice modulator kicked in. “what makes you think I want that filthy mouth on me?” He grabbed your jaw and squeezed your mouth open. He brought his other gloved hand to your lips and gagged you with two gloved fingers.
"I asked you a question," he prodded.
"I 'unno" you mumbled into his fingers and reached for his crotch, trying to wedge your hand between your torsos. His fingers slid out of your mouth and his hand flew to your wrist to stop you. He pinned your hands above your head, one of his gloves wet with your saliva.
“You don't wanna kill me,” you breathed.
You seemed to have him at a loss for words. He was a different guy without his knife -- still menacing, but not lethal.
“Not tonight." He got up and left you on the ground. He swiftly made for the exit, robe trailing behind him.
But the door was locked. Awkward.
Now you've been trapped long enough that he’s run out of clever, taunting things to say, so he just doesn't talk. The main sound is lab rats squeaking and trying to burrow for warmth in their enclosure. It's cold in this building. You don't have sleeves and your legs are bare, too.
Ghostface sits against the wall with his knees up. You're shivering in a corner by yourself, replaying your interactions with Ghostface in your mind. Has he ever really, truly hurt you? He's had chances to kill you. Why didn't he? Your teeth start chattering.
Eventually he sighs and says "Get over here." You look at him, pondering it. He opens his arms and adds, “This offer expires in thirty seconds.”
You scurry over to him, planning to sit between his knees but he straightens his legs out so they're together, and he lifts up his robe for you to get underneath. He's wearing joggers and a matching sweatshirt underneath. You're more scantily clad. "Why don't you just give me the robe," you ask.
"Don't press your luck," he answers.
You duck under his robe and straddle his thighs with your knees on the floor. "You're gonna wanna get closer than that, little rat."
You scoot forward and he lets the robe down on top of you. It's a little heavier and warmer than you imagined. When he's chasing after you, it moves like it weighs nothing.
It's pitch black under his robe. He wraps his arms around you and hugs you into him so your crotch meets his. You gasp when you feel the shape of his warm package against your crotch. "Feel somethin’ ya like?" He asks.
"You're warm," you answer, laying your cheek on his chest with your eyes closed under his robe. "Who are you?"
His laugh is as dark as it is quiet.
You tuck your arms under your chest and he keeps his arms wrapped around you. He smells good. A woodsy, minty scent. He caresses you as he holds you. God, he feels like. . .a man. A real man. His breaths get deeper, his chest rising under you. It happens gradually, but at some point there's no mistaking the bulge you're sitting on is hard, and it's for you. He brings his arms into the robe. His gloved hands pull your skirt up over your ass with a soft grunt not caught by the voice changer. Then he takes his gloves off.
His hands are huge and warm on your bare ass cheeks. He kneads them and his hips lift under you, the swell of his hard cock making you dizzy with need under the pitch black darkness of his robe. You sigh and he wedges a finger under your pointless little thong and snaps it. You reach back to un-wedge it from your ass cheeks and when you pull it out, he slips his finger between your ass and the garment. He slides his finger all the way down, under you, until he reaches your wet little hole. You're beginning to gush.
He sighs, then the voice changer says - "You're making a mess on me, princess."
He lifts you with a grunt, then pulls his joggers down under his cock. He sets you back down, angling you strategically so your front meets his smooth, thick shaft. It's throbbing and burning hot, right between your legs. You sigh. His hands return to your ass and he moves your body, grinding you against his hard cock a few times.
Then, to your horror, you help him take it further. You pull your thong to the side as he lifts you and notches himself at your entrance. You whimper as your cunt swallows his tip, then your body spreads itself apart for him as you sink down his thick shaft. Ghostface shudders and you gasp when your bodies are flush.
“Good,” he whispers in a deep, human voice. Your body accommodates him and you get even wetter. You begin to move, needing to fuck yourself on his cock, but he holds you down and makes you still. “Sit,” he commands at full volume ghostface voice. “Stay.” The hair on your neck stands up.
You sit still on his cock.
“Good,” he says, then adds, "Hmm." He pats your head where it rests on his shoulder.
You sit there in his lap, wrapped around the body of this man, in total darkness under his robe, absolutely full of his cock. You relax enough that you begin to get sleepy. You yawn.
You sit there for what feels like an eternity. You feel stretched out, even after you relax. Your walls occasionally twitch around him, and his cock throbs and moves inside you. You’re cozy under his robe, comfortable in his arms, and throbbing on his cock. The warmth of his robe and the feeling of his arms around you lull you to sleep.
Almost as soon as you drift off, he thrusts his hips up and jolts you awake with the punch of his cock. He braces one hand on the floor and has the other arm around you. He leans back so you're held against his chest and he's fucking up into you. He grunts and sighs and the modulator harshly spits, “yeah, you're a good little bitch.”
He keeps fucking you from the bottom, and you feel a heat bubbling in the pit of your belly as his big cock pistons into you. Then he holds you tight against him and fucks you slower, grinding your pubic bone against his, and it's rubbing your clit and making you spasm. "You like that?" He asks.
“Oh, baby,” he breathes, then his voice is changed again. “Gonna make me cum if you're not careful.”
His words make you clench down as you see stars. You moan into his sweatshirt, and the pleasure pulses from your clit as your whole body jerks and your cunt chokes his cock. You're not finished coming when Ghostface holds you down.
You try to get off him, but he holds you down harder and erupts, filling you with his hot seed. You can't deny how good it feels with him pulsing inside you as your own climax wanes. At least you're alive, you think. At least Plan B exists.
When you begin to get off his cock, he doesn't let you. He keeps you plugged, impaled on him, long enough that you both fall asleep.
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thank you for reading. my main ghostface series, unrelated to this one shot, is Every Inch.
i have a michael blurb with a kinda similar premise here. idk why i'm into this scenario but i guess i am lol.
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justlin22 · 8 days
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Doctor's Appointment
Dr. Zayne x Reader (Post Breakup)
_________________________
He broke up with you, and it cut deep. The Chief Surgeon of AKSO shattered your heart—the very heart he once swore to protect with every fibre of his being. How dare he pull the trigger and claim defeat in his own battlefield? He had no right to raise the white flag after only two years. But today, you had to face the man who was once the alpha in your eyes but had now fallen from grace. Today was your annual check-up with your primary physician, Dr. Zayne himself.
It was almost laughable that the one who saved your heart had also broken it, and now he was the one trying to piece it back together. You entered his office with your medical report in hand, wearing your usual hunter uniform and your pride—what little remained. Your eyes met his, a silent acknowledgment passing between you. You managed a faint smile before sitting in the hot seat by his desk. A swirl of emotions—sadness, anger, a sliver of something else—tightened in your chest. You didn’t know which would surface before his ever-cold demeanour.
As you passed his desk, he held his usual stoic expression. You nearly gagged at the sight of that mask, knowing all too well what lay beneath. He was surely thrilled to see you again, despite his façade. Meeting your gaze again must have cost him less pride than breaking it. "Asshole," you muttered in your head.
"Sit," he ordered, gesturing to the chair beside his desk.
The command struck a nerve. Your heart burned. Even now, he wielded authority over you like you were a child. You bit your tongue, determined not to lose your composure, and sat.
He picked up your medical report, flipping through the notes slowly, as if savouring each moment. It felt like an eternity beside him. You caught him stealing glances at you. By now, you were sure he had some inappropriate thoughts running through that handsome head of his. His legs shifted restlessly—left, right, up, down. You rolled your eyes.
He placed the stethoscope around his neck and rolled his chair closer, closing the distance to check your heart. “I need to listen,” he said, his tone steady. You unbutton your shirt, revealing the singlet underneath, your skin exposed for his assessment. The cold steel of the stethoscope grazed your skin, and your breath hitched. His grip on the stethoscope tightened slightly, betraying the struggle beneath his composed exterior. His head hovered near your chest, and he didn’t dare to look up. You glanced down at him and felt a wave of disgust at the sight you once loved. You could almost hear his heartbeat, quickening in his chest. Your presence alone was enough to make this man weak, lost in his own recollection of claiming your body. He lingered longer than necessary, listening to your heartbeat as if savouring a forbidden memory.
“Take a deep breath for me,” he ordered, his voice controlled, masking the turmoil within. His composure grated on your nerves. How dare he hide so well behind that calm exterior? You wanted nothing more than to tear down that facade, to force him to reveal his real emotions, raw and unguarded. 
A swirl of thoughts danced in your mind: Should you tease him, test his restraint? Remain passive, letting him lead this unsettling encounter? Or push back, confront him with aggression? You decided to bide your time, choosing submission—for now. Let him think he's in control. You would watch his every move, every flicker of emotion that slipped through his carefully maintained mask, ready to act when the moment was right.
You took a deep breath, your chest rising and falling under his gaze. His eyes remained fixed, but you caught the slight bob of his Adam's apple, betraying a crack in his stoic demeanour. Slowly, he moved the stethoscope across your chest, and the brush of his fingertips grazed your skin in between. His breath, warm and uneven, fanned across your exposed skin. It was a subtle but deliberate move, one that did not go unnoticed. A sly tactic indeed.
“Take another deep breath for me,” he commanded, his voice low and steady. His head hovered even closer to your chest, so near it felt as though he wanted to press his ear directly against your skin. You obliged, drawing in a deep breath, feeling the rise and fall of your chest. As you inhaled, his hand slid to your back, as if to steady your posture, a gesture that felt far too intimate.
You rolled your eyes, a wave of disgust washing over you at the sensation of his touch and the warmth of his hand. The very closeness that once made your heart race now left you cold, reminding you of the betrayal hidden beneath his stoic exterior.
Satisfied with what he heard, he leaned back and removed the stethoscope from his ears, placing it on the table with deliberate slowness. He picked up your medical report and began jotting down notes, his eyes flicking up to steal glances at you—as if he were checking for any reaction, searching for a crack in your composure. Each lingering look felt like a probing question, a silent dare, and it sent a cold shiver coursing down your spine, spreading to your feet. The room suddenly felt smaller, the air thick with unspoken words and the tension that hung between you both.
“Your arm, please,” he commanded, his voice steady yet with an underlying tension. You rolled up the sleeve of your shirt and extended your arm toward his desk. Before you could place it down, his hand captured your arm, holding it with a firm, possessive grip. His other hand moved slowly, fingertips brushing along the veins, lingering as if savouring the feel of your skin. His touch wasn’t hurried or clinical; it was deliberate, exploring more than necessary, sending a ripple of unease up your spine. It was as if he were trying to sense more than just your heartbeat—searching for a reaction, a sign of what you might be feeling beneath the surface.
You shot him a cold, unyielding stare—the classic resting bitch face—making it clear you were unamused by his touch. It was as if you had erased all memory of his warmth, every tender moment now buried under layers of indifference. You refused to give him what he seemed to crave—a reaction, a sign that his touch still had any effect on you. Instead, you held your ground, your expression hardened, denying him the satisfaction of knowing he could still stir something within you.
After the checkup, he jotted down notes on your medical report, but you could feel his eyes on you—stealing glances, more frequent and lingering than before. It was clear he was unsatisfied, frustrated even, by your lack of response to his lingering, intimate touches. His demeanour remained controlled, but there was a hint of irritation in his movements as he began to ask you a series of questions, more than he would normally ask.
“Did you get enough rest?” he asked, his tone almost demanding. You nodded, keeping your expression neutral, not even granting him the satisfaction of hearing your voice.
“Are you eating properly, following the recommended diet?” Another nod, your silence growing louder with each question.
“Are you getting regular exercise?” Yet another nod.
“Have you experienced any uneasiness with your heart?” he pressed, watching you closely. You shook your head, giving nothing away.
Each answer was brief, a nod or a shake of your head—never a word. You refused to give him what he seemed to want: a reaction, a sound, anything that might break the cold, impassable wall you'd put up. His questions seemed to dig for something deeper, but you kept your responses simple and detached, denying him even the chance to hear your voice.
He set his pen down, visibly unsatisfied with your responses, even though you had answered everything. His frustration was palpable, his eyes narrowing slightly as if recalculating his approach. Without a word, he reached into his breast pocket and pulled out a small flashlight, turning back to you with a determined look.
“I need to check your eyes,” he said, his voice steady but carrying an undercurrent of something more—a persistence that felt almost too personal.
He rolled his chair forward swiftly, closing the distance between you in an instant. His hand cupped your left cheek, his thumb gently brushing the skin beneath your eye with an unexpected tenderness. His touch lingered, and your eyes met his. His face was so close, you could feel the warmth of his breath against your lips. In his green eyes, you caught a swirl of conflicting emotions—sadness, longing, desire, and regret—a vulnerable mix you rarely saw from him.
For a moment, it felt like words failed him; his gaze bore into yours, searching desperately for any flicker of emotion, any sign that you felt something too. His hold was firm yet uncertain, as if he were balancing on the edge of a precipice, waiting for you to either push him over or pull him back. His need for a reaction was almost tangible, the air thick with tension as he tried to read what was hidden behind your guarded eyes.
Your lips hovered near his, close enough to feel the heat between you. Then, in a heartbeat, he closed the distance, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. It was intense and raw, a kiss that poured out everything he couldn't say—his longing, his regret, his unspoken desire.
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mask131 · 8 months
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The gods of Gaul: Cernunnos
Cernunnos is without a doubt one of the most famous gods of Ancient Gaul, and yet he is actually one of the most mysterious Gallic deities. Sure, he definitively marked the imagination of people - I mean he was literaly used as the basis for the Wiccan Horned God, and you will see lots of Cernunnos-copycats in fantasy RPGs and the like. But... we actually do not know the truth about this god, and despite everybody on the Internet trying to make it sound like we have an easy and simple summary of what he is, we only have strong theories and conflicting hypothesis.
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I/ What we actually have
As with a lot of Gallic gods, Cernunnos exists not in legends or myths, but through a name and a visual. The name Cernunnos is found three times all on its own in Gallic documents. One was a Greek inscription from Montagnac that only says "This is dedicated to Karnonos of Alisontia". The other two are identical inscriptions found in Luxemburg (near Steinsel), votive inscriptions of wish-offerings merely saying "Deo Ceruninco". There is actually a fourth inscripton of the name Cernunnos - and it is from this one that we get the spelling we use today - but it is a special one. Unlike the other three, this one has a picture alongside it identifying the god visually. It is the famous "pilier des Nautes" found under Notre-Dame-de-Paris, the "pillar of the Nautes", the "pillar of Boatmen", considered one of the most important Gallic monuments (because it depicts a set of divine portraits with their names explicitely spelled out).
It is only thanks to this pillar that we know today that the many depictions of a male horned god found across Gallic art are meant to be Cernunnos. There are too many visual depictions of him to be listed here (sixty or so were found by archeologists), but among the most famous is the one I put a picture of above: the Cernunnos of the Gundestrup cauldron found in Denmark.
Here is what Cernunnos looks like on the pilier des Nautes:
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So, we have a name and a bunch of pictures. Let's try to break it all down.
When it comes to the name, Cernunnos/Karnonos, it is commonly agreed by etymologists and those that studied the Gallic language that it means "the horned god". "Carnon/Karnon/Karn" was known to mean "horn", both in the sense of animal's horn and a blowing instrument - it was tied to the Gallic tribes known as the Carni and Carnutes, and to the Celtic carnyx. The "kern" part is also considered to be equivalent to the Old Irish "cern", which was associated with horned beasts. Some have pointed out that if the "Cern" of "Cernunnos" means horn, the "unnos" could be a suffix meaning "beautifully" - so instead of Cernunnos being the "horned god" or the "horned one" it would mean "He who is beautifully horned" or "He with beautiful horns". But all in all, his name stays connected to horns.
[But is it truly his name? This is another debate typical with the gods of Gaul: we do not know the differences between the proper names, the titles and the nicknames. It could be (to take a Greek comparison) like Hestia's case, where he names literaly means "hearth" but is a proper name ; or it could be like the "Old Man of the Sea" which was a generic nickname for a whole group of sea deities.
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Now let's talk about the images of the god. Thanks to having so many depictions of him, we can identify recurring traits that define his visual.
Cernunnos always appears with his legs crossed, in a position (the "lotus" or "yoga positon" to take Asian terminology) that is considered, depending on the sources, either "very unusual for a god of Gaul", either "absolutely typical of Celtic representations of gods, warriors and heroes"... Well, he is almost always in the "lotus position" - in rare cases, he can be standing up. Cernunnos is also always wearing a torc, the traditional Gallic ornament, though he isn't always wearing it around his neck as one would expect: sometimes he holds it in his hands, other time it hangs from his antlers. Speaking of antlers: as we said, Cernunnos is a horned god, and he is usually depicted with antlers. But sometimes, more rarely, he rather sports goat horns - maybe it is a Romanization effect, as he got confused with Pan?
Cernunnos is always a male figure, though his actual age is unclear. Sometimes he is a mature and bearded man, but we also have "ephebe" depictions of him as a beardless youth - that some researchers even go as far as to describe as "child-like". Similarly, he keeps oscilatting between being a singular entity, and a triple-god with three heads or three faces. The disposition of the three faces can be really weird and freaky - for example, he can have a regular human head, and two small human faces growing from either side of his neck, or from the top of his head.
He usually always has a bag or basket with him, a bag that he eithers opens or that is simply sitting before him, spilling its content: sometimes the bag is filled with food, other times with coins, and other tims yet with grain. Cernunnos is usually sitting in the middle of a trio (as in two other humaoid or divine figures are by his side), or he is surrounded by various animals - which he can be seen holding with one hand, or petting near his lap. There are various animals he is associated with - we have seen him with stags, with bulls, with rats, with dogs, with lions, with goats... He is most notorious for being often depicted with the symbolic-mythical beast of Gaul known as the cryocephal snake: a ram-headed snake, whose exact meaning is still unclear to this day. However, Cernunnos seems to really like them: sometmes they just sit side by side, sometims he holds it by the throat, sometimes he feeds it, and other times two of them sit on his lap.
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(This depiction above lacks any horns, but there are two holes at the top of the head implying that the horns were a different part of the statue added separately - which is very interesting in the theory of Cernunnos having antlers that "fall")
One of the problems with the Cernunnos visuals is that it is not clear where they stop, as we got a wide range of variations between the animal and the man. For example, there are strong theories according to which Cernunnos appears on the Strettweg chariot, as the tiny deer with oversized antlers that two men are holding (which would mean Cernunnos could be depicted as a full stag without human traits):
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And on the opposite spectrum, a Gallo-Roman statue was found in Amiens of a fully human deity... except for one deer ear on the side of his face. One of the theories to explain this bizarre statue of the first century claims that it is an hyper-Romanized depiction of Cernunnos - though other theories do exist (for example, when the statue was discovered, it was originally believed to depict Midas, with a variation of the "donkey ear" punishment):
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And you also have in Bouray a cross-legged god with deer legs rather than antlers or ears:
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Given how "late" the visual depictions of the gods of Gaul was, and how the Romanization of Gaul strongly encouraged and favorized the depiction of deities as humanoids (to fit with the Greco-Roman deities), it is very likely that Cernunnos started as a divine stag, as fully animal, and then slowly, especially under the Roman influence, became more and more humanized... (There's also a fascinating case of antlered-goddesses at Clermont-Ferrand and Besançon, but that's for later).
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II/ Some theories
Now that we have the name and the visuals done... What's Cernunnos deal? Again remember we can only make theories based on these fragments and their context - but we do not know for certain if it is the truth.
A: It is agreed that Cernunnos is a nature god, and a god of abundance. The fact he is half-stag, and usually depicted with animals, and even holding them in a gesture of domination or use, shows that he is a fauna god, which prompted some researchers to identify him as one of the avatars of the "Lord of Animals, Master of Wild Things" archetype of Indo-European myths. But more importantly we are certain that he dealt with abundance and prosperity - thanks to him always having a big bag of grain, food or money. He was very clearly a god of riches and wealth - be them natural (grain, food) or manufactured (coins). Some have highlighted the idea that this tied to the symbolism of "forests that have big strong stags in them are bound to be fertile places filled with resources". Cernunnos' ties to abundance cannot be denied because in some Classicized depictions of him (such as the silver goblet above), he is literaly seen holding a cornucopia, aka a horn of abundance.
Some people even want to push the domain further by thinking Cernunnos might have been a god of sexual and reproductive fertility - but this is not based on any visual or religious clue. Rather this theory ties on the European symbolism of the stag as a symbol of virility and reproductive prowess, so it is a purely contextual reading, to be handled carefully. We are only truly certain that Cernunnos offered lots of money, lots of grain, lots of food, and lots of animals (him being surrounded by animals might be an extension of the "I offer you this bag of grain" visual, since animals were hunted down for food, so he isn't just a god of good crops and economic riches, but also one that ensures a plentiful hunt).
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B: There is a strong theory going around that Cernunnos might be a seasonal god, or a deity of the seasonal cycle. This idea comes from various elements pieced together - and which added with the A theory above, would make this go a sort of "Father Nature" figure. It all starts wth the European symbolism of the antlers and the stag in general: given the antlers fall and grow with the turn of the seasons, the stag has been used heavily in Europe as a way to measure the year or symbolize seasons. Some researchers theorized, based on how the size of Cernunnos antlers changes through depictions, and on how he is sometimes a beardless youth sometimes a bearded mature man, that Cernunnos, like the stag, had a seasonal cycle. For some he just loses and grows back his antlers (there is a Cernunnos depiction at Meaux with what seems to be the stubs growing back after antlers fall, which would support this theory), but others push it further by claiming the god died and was reborn each year with winter/spring - an idea inspired by the Indo-European archetype of the dying/sacrifical vegetation god.
There is a specific depiction of Cernunnos that ties into this whole - and I will have to trust Yann Brekilen's word for this, as I couldn't find any picture of the engravings he described. According to him, on the Gallo-Roman Germanicus Arch/Arc, by Saintes, there is a dual depiction of Cernunnos. On one side of the Arch, he is part of a trio: he is sitting crossed-leg with antlers on his head, but naked (usually Cernunnos s clothed in some ways). By his side there is a man armed with a club/mace (which might be tied to the "god with the mace", we'll see that in later posts), and a woman holding a cornucopia. Now, that's on one side of the monument - but on the opposite side, the scene is reproduced... with both the armed man and the antlers of Cernunnos missing, only leaving a regular cross-legged naked man, and the cornucopia-woman. Speaking of this cornucopia-woman: there are repeated talks and interpretations of any female figure by Cernunnos' side to be a "Mother-Goddess" or Earth-Goddess supposed to be the wife/companion/lover of Cernunnos. This is all part of an effort to make Cernunnos a "father-god" (which makes sense in some ways), and it ties into the whole reading of his myth as being a seasonal cycle (the god dying and resurrecting after impregnating his female counterpart ; something the Wiccan mythology for example reused in their beliefs), but... If you ask me, I am not really convinced? A lot of people insist on there being a "Mother Goddess" clearly by Cernunnos' side, but sometimes you see these people reinterpret a lot of the visuals, and it is not obvious that the female figure is with him (Cernunnos is usually surrounded by male figures rather than female ones). Plus, we know the Mother Goddess of Gaul tended to come in three (the famous Matronae) so... I am a bit doubtful of that, but that's just me and because of a lack of convincing evidence.
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III/ Comparisons and equivalences
As I said in my introduction post, a lot of what we know about the Gallic gods comes from the syncretism the Romans operated with their own deities. And with Cernunnos it is... complicated. Because we do not know exactly who was the Roman equivalent of Cernunnos (since the Romans did not speak of him), and based on researches we have two likely candidates. It is very possible Cernunnos might have been split into those two Roman deities, or at least that his attributes led him to be interpreted as two deities mixed in one.
On one side, there is a very strong and popular theory that Cerunnos was the god Cesar, in his description of the religion of Gaul, called the "Dis Pater". "Dis Pater" was the Latin god that was equated and synthesized with the Greek Hades under the share nickname "Pluto", "the rich one". This was because Dis Pater was not originally a god of the dead in the old Italian religion - he was an underground god, indeed, but a chthonic god of riches and wealth, an earth-god of fertility (his very name meant "Rich Father"). This is what tied him to Hades, the richest of the Greek gods - and made him the new god of the underworld and the dead, Pluto. So, equating Dis Pater with Cernunnos makes sense as we do know that both deities were strongly associated with an earthly form of fertility: Cernunnos, just like Dis Pater, brought grain and earth-grown fruit, as well as precious metal (in the form of coins). Not only that, but Cernunnos was strongly associated with the ram-headed snake, and while we don't know much about this mythical being (typically a companion of male gods in Gallic art), it seems to have been a chthonian symbol, and perhaps even a form of guardian of the world of the dead (or a guardian of underground riches cousin of the dragons of legends). This is what led many to interpret Cernunnos as a chthonian deity, perhaps even an afterlife deity - a tradition that seems to have been in early Christian art, where Cernunnos was often associated with the "mouth of Hell" or the "entrance to Hades" (like the 9th century manuscript Stuttsgart Psalter, which illustrates Cernunnos in a depiction of the Christ descending into Limbo.
If Cernunnos is indeed Cesar's Dis Pater, then it would be extremely interesting, because Cesar wrote in his records that the peopleof Gaul believed Dis Pater to be their divine ancestor, and the "father of their race". Aka, the Gallic Dis Pater is meant to be an All-Father, the first ancestor of the Gallic tribes, and the origin of the human race (or at least of the people of Gaul). If Cernunnos is this Dis Pater, it would confirm his role as a "Father-God" and his links to a potential "Mother-Goddess". (It could also explain why he so persistantly wears a torc, as an emblem of the civilization and traditions of Gaul) If Cernunnos is also the Dis Pater, it would give him a role as a nocturnal god, since Cesar resumed in his texts (or rather "recaped" since he was doing a report based on Posidonius own records) that it was because the people of Gaul descended from Dis Pater that the druids measured the time not in "days" but in "nights"...
The other very likely candidate for the Romanized Cernunnos is the one we call the "Gallic Mercury". We know that Mercury was one of the most popular and widespread gods of Gallo-Roman gaul. Cesar did mention him as one of the most important gods venerated by the Gallic tribes before the omans arrive (though this would contadict the is Pater theory, since Cesar identifies Dis Pater and Mercury as two different deities in the Gallic beliefs). Still, Mercury was a god of commerce and riches before all - even more so than his Greek counterpart Hermes - so it makes sense that he would be present in the Gaul province of the Empire, which was big heart of commerce. And where Mercury has a pouch of coins, Cernunnos has a full bag of them... And in several Gallo-Romans depictions one of the two gods that surround Cernunnos is very obviously Mercury... [Several of the images in this post are of the altar of Reims, which depicts Cernunnos surrounded by Apollo on one side and Mercury on the other] And Cernunnos' presence on the Pillar of Boatmen implies he was tied to the fluvial sailors, and to the fluvial commerce and travels... And in Luxembourg we have Gallic depictions of stags vomitting coins, again insisting on how the stag was associated with riches... Even if you take Cernunnos as a chtonian god or death god, it ties to Mercury's role as a psychopomp inherited from Hermes ; and Mercury's presence by Cernunnos side on the altar of Reims for example makes sense if you consider one of the deities Cernunnos was conflated with was Pan (hence the goat horns) - aka, the son of Hermes... Everything is tied together into one big convoluted web of inter-mythologies.
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And when it comes to comparisons to other Celtic mythologies, things are a bit... In French we say "vaseux" - basically there were parallels drawn between Cernunnos and Celtic figures of the Isles, but they rely on very meager if not unstable links. For example some have tried to identify the Cernunnos of Gaul with the Irish figure of Nemed (interpreted as a "stag-god" leading "stag-people" or "deer-people"), and in return the battle between Nemed and Balor for the land of Ireland was projected onto the scene depicted on the Arch that I described prior - a battle between the horned god and the god with the mace for the "earth-mother", the cornucopia woman, the land-goddess. The acceptance of this scene between the horned god and the mace god as a battle for the mother-goddess (which, I insist, was not PROVEN in any way and is completely hypothetic and theorized with no definitive proof - maybe the mace god is here to sacrifice the horned god for the cornucopia-woman, or maybe he is just here to cut off his antlers, or maybe the cornucopia woma cheats on Cernunnos wit the mace god, we cannot know), also led to vague comparisons being drawn to the story of Pwyll and Arawn and how they exchange each other's identities, but we are really in a stretch here.
More interestingly there is a Welsh comparison that could indicate a leftover of a Christianized Cernunnos in an Arthurian setting: the Owein tale (Mabinogi): Kynon, a knight of King Arthur's court, describes how in his youth he had to encounter an ugly knight clad in a black armor who had the information he needed to find his enemy. The knight lived by a "fountain" (a water stream) surrounded by wild and ferocious animals - and to give Kynon the information he needed, the ugly black knight struck a stag nearby, and the animal lowers its head in the direction Kynon must follow. It is very plausible that this supernatural knight who hits an informative stag and who lives surrounded by wild animals is a form of Christian censorship or caricature of a Cernunnos figure, going from a wise and benevolent stag-god to an ugly evil knight who abuses animals, and who has his duality human/beast split between the knight and the stag.
There were also tenuous elements that made people consider the Irish Conall Cernach (known for being one of the sidekicks of Cuchulainn) as a diluted version of Cernunnos as a "Master of Beasts" - more precisely an episode in "The Cattle Raid on Fraech" where instead of killing a monstrous snake, Conall somehow tames it and wears it as a belt, has been compared to Cernunnos' handling of snakes and ram-headed snakes. And don't even get me started on the many, MANY saints of Catholicism that are supposed to be leftovers or reinventions of Cernunnos (saint Ciaran of Saighir, because he tamed wild beasts including a stag ; or the saints of Bretagne Edern and Théleau both supposed to ride a stag instead of a horse...).
The complicated thing (well ONE of the complicated things) with Cernunnos is that he is tied to the stag, and the stag was one of the most prominent smbols and images of the medieval and proto-medieval imagery in Western Europe. You had lot of old mythology stuff that survived in modern days, but you also had lots of medieval symbolism and images (like how the flying stag was one of the symbols of the king of France), and a HUGE re-use of the stag by Christianity in various forms (from the antlers falling being used as a symbol of the Resurrection, to the hunt for the white otherwordly stag of Celtic myths suddenly becoming a hunt for Christ incarnate when a glowing cross appears above the stag's head...). As such it is hard to pin-point what the Gauls truly believed the stag meant, versus the stag symbolism that arose in the Middle-Ages.
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To conclude this post, while I said I had my doubts with systematic identifications of Cernunnos as a companion of a Mother-Goddess, I want to briefly return about a fascinating trivia of Gallic researches: the existence of a female version of Cernunnos, a "Cernunna" we could jokingly say.
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Little figurines and statues were found of a horned goddess - sometimes with antlers! - in both the area of Clermont-Ferrand (which was the domain of the Avernes folk) and around Besançon (the Séquane folk). Who were these goddesses? Local variations of Cernunnos? Sisters, daughters or wives of the god? Or completely unrelated deities? Were they one or several (some are more matronly, motherly figures such as the one with antlers above, others have Venus-like poses unveiling their breast and legs such as the bull-horned below)?
We will probably never know - but while they can be incarnations of this famed "Mother-Goddess" companion of Cernunnos everybody speaks about (and links to the importation of the cults of Demeter and Cybele in Gaul), it is VERY likely these statues date from the Gallo-Roman era and from a Romanized version of the Gallic religion. Indeed, they are all tied by their attributes - they hold a cornucopia, and a "patère" (sacred vase for religious libations). Attributes present in very Romanized Gallic goddesses (such as Rosmerta), but also in typical Roman deities (mainly the lares). Add to that how the adjunction of a male attribute (the stag antlers or bull horns) to a female figure is VERY unusual for Gallic depictions (where the genders are neatly split), while the divine androgyny was a feature of Greco-Roman mythology (the effeminate Apollo and Dionysos, the masculine goddesses Athena and Artemis, the mythical Hermaphrodite...), and it is very likely these statues of the "Cernunna" are the result of the Roman religion "breeding" with the Gallic beliefs...
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