#i turned her into goth gf what have i done

[purensanity]

Some Liz warm up stuffs, i’m finally getting happy with her design direction

[gay-wh0re-slut]

Heyy, I just wanted to know if you could write a story with rhea x Fem! reader where the reader is ashamed of her body hair and Rhea comforts her,ending with a big smut✨️

Sorry for this request but my body hair makes me very uncomfortable and I need to read something like this🥺

don’t be sorry! body hair is normal and everyone has it! society has told us (women esp) that body hair is bad but it’s not, it’s natural! you can do whatever you want with it, shave it, don’t shave it, hell braid it if it gets long enough lol, i know it’s easier said than done but never be ashamed for things that happen naturally as a human being but don’t worry friend, i got you.

Ever, Ever

rhea x fem!reader

content: talks of body hair but then turns to hot sexy times with hot buff goth wrestler gf ooooo (slight choking, praise, oral, fingering, squirting hehe)

You giggle at a funny post you found on instagram, “look!” you turn the phone to Rhea who was sitting beside you on the bed.

She was doing some work on her computer but she turned to look, “oh, that’s a good one,” she laughed with you.

The two of you continue to sit in comfortable silence as she types away and you scroll away. You both loved nights like this, nothing going on, just being together, relaxing and enjoying each other’s presence. It was a good reset for both of you, with your nine to five job and her crazy one, it was good to just be.

She slammed the enter key one last time and closed her laptop, “finally,” she sighed as she placed it on the side table. “Do you want a snack?”

“Ooooh, yes please!” you smile at her.

“I’ll be right back,” and she walked out of the bedroom.

You smile thinking that there’s no where else you’d rather be. You’re with the love of your life, having a night in, doing absolutely nothing, well, now you were. She comes back in with a lot of things.

“I wasn’t sure what I wanted or what you wanted so I brought options,” her arms were full with cheez-its, fruit snacks and who knows what else.

“Oh,” you chuckle, “thank you, baby.”

She displayed them all out over the bed, she gestured dramatically over them twinkling her fingers to show you the options.

You decide on the fruit snacks, two bags because one is never enough.

“Good choice,” she said picking up the protein bar.

“C’mon, live a little,” you joke to her.

“Fine, fine,” she throws the bar down and taps her chin thinking. Finally she chooses the potato chips, “better?” she held them up, they were still the healthy ones.

“Yes, thank you,” you laugh.

“I’ll take the rest back,” she gathers up the remaining snacks and heads back to the pantry.

The two of you sit on your phones, enjoying your respective snacks, showing each other funny tiktok’s, memes, and cool drawings people made of her.

Her hand landed on your thigh, but you thought nothing of it, she loved to be touching you whenever she could.

You didn’t notice her put her phone down but you did notice when she moved herself closer to you and started kissing your arm. You kissed her head in a response but she kept going. Gently kissing up your arm until she made it to your neck. Wave after wave of pleasure sent through your body with every kiss. She took your phone out of your hand, that you weren’t really paying attention to anymore, and put it on your side table.

The hand on your thigh moved up to gently caress your hot center, “c’mon baby,” she whispered.

You moaned softly into her touch but suddenly stopped her, “no wait-”

“What’s wrong? You okay?” she immediately pulled her hand away.

“Yeah, it’s just… you’ve been away so I haven’t, uh… shaved,” your face was red from embarrassment.

“Baby,” her face softened, “I love every part of you no matter what. A little hair isn’t gonna hurt me.”

“But I don’t want-”

“Unless you got some crazy thing going on down there, like teeth or something,” she chuckled, “I don’t mind one bit.”

You tried to talk, “But it’s gro-”

She put a finger over your mouth, “It’s not gross, it’s not ugly, it’s normal. Do you care when I don’t shave?”

She didn’t move her finger so you just shook your head.

“Exactly,” she finally removed her finger, “if you don’t want to continue, that’s perfectly fine, but unshaven or not, I’m still gonna love you,” she smiled.

You gave her a weak smile, “are you sure? Because it’s pretty gnarly.”

“Baby…I promise.”

You stared at her for second to make sure she was really sure, “okay.”

“Now, can I get back to what I was doing or…” she said jokingly.

You giggle, “yes, please.”

Giving you a devilish grin, she bows her head to kiss your neck again, leaving soft slow pecks on your skin. She moved herself on top of you straddling your hips. Your hand tangled into her hair keeping it out of her way.

She nibbled at your ear until she whispered, “You’re so…” she kissed your jaw, “hypnotizing…” she kissed down your jawline, “and beautiful…” one of her hands snuck to your neck and gently squeezed, “and…” her hand clutched to your neck hard as she looked you in the eyes, “don’t you ever, ever think otherwise.”

Your eyes were wide but your smile was huge at the sensation, “yes Mami,” you choke out.

“Good,” she barked as she released her hand, “my sweet girl,” she then she dragged her hand over your shirt down to your pajama shorts, sneaking it under the waistband. Her fingers found your dripping center, “look at you,” she gently swiped her fingers against you, “barely even started and you’re already ready for me.” She teased at your entrance, but decided against it. So she settled for teasing your clit instead.

Your back arched as a long moan left you, “mmmmcan’t help it,” you released your breath. One of your hands was behind her neck while the other was on the back of her thigh pushing her in closer, digging your nails into the tattoos as she continued to work her magic. You pull her neck down so that she could kiss you, and that she did.

You didn’t expect it to be, but it was hot and sloppy and you begged for more. Her hand below went faster as the kissing became more intense. You made small whines into her mouth between labored breaths. Her lips finally let go of you as she pulled her hand out.

You huffed at the loss, but she quickly got off of you and yanked your shorts and underwear off and threw them onto the floor. Without hesitation, she spread your legs and immediately began to lap at your wet folds.

“Fuck,” you groan as your hands found their way back to her hair.

Her arms curled around your thighs, “you taste so good, babygirl,” then she began to suck on your clit.

You tightened your grip at her words as your eyes pinched closed but you could feel her smiling against you. You were squirming but she was holding you perfectly still with her insane strength. She finally let go of one of your legs, teasing her fingers at your entrance once more.

“Mhmm…yessss, please!” you whine.

“You know I love when you beg,” and she pushes her way inside.

“Oh fuck,” as your back arched again.

She was pumping in and out of you at a steady pace as she continued to use her tongue on your pulsing bud. You writhed under her grip but she kept your hips still. The pressure in your stomach was quickly building, “harder, mami, please!”

“Oh, you want it rough today, princess?”

“God yes, please,” you beg.

“As you wish,” she grinned.

You barely noticed but in one second she removed her hand, flipped it over, plunged back into you so now the heel of hand was facing up and her two middle fingers were pumping into you at an outrageous pace. She kissed your thigh before she maneuvered herself back on top of you. She kissed you, making sure that you could taste yourself on her tongue.

She trailed her kisses down your neck, then began to bite, rolling your skin in her teeth, “you’re doing so well,” she whispered, she sucked at your skin not caring if she left a mark, “you feel so good on me,” she said in your ear.

You were untangling beneath her, your eyes were in the back of your head, your hands were gripping at anything you could reach, her arms, her back, her hair, the sheets. You barely had any air in your lungs, your hips were riding her hand that was setting the ungodly pace, trying so hard to keep up.

“I know you want to, baby,” she grinned at the noises that were spilling out of you, “I’m not going to stop you,” her voice was calm and sultry, it was driving you insane, more than you already were.

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!” you screamed.

“C’mon baby!” she yelled over your deafening whines.

You gasped for air as you curled up with your mouth wide open and your eyes rolled back, “FFFUUCKK!!” the pressure inside of you released so violently that you slammed your head onto the pillow beneath.

She immediately pulled her hand out of you as you squirted all over the sheets and her hand that couldn’t move fast enough.

“Holy fuck,” you heard her say over your loud moan. She plunged back into you when you were done and continued her pace smiling from ear to ear, “again,” was all she said. Though this time, her free hand found its way back to your neck and squeezed.

Your hands gripped her arm as you gave her a wicked smile. Just a minute later, the pressure was back and ready to be released again. You groaned, whined and moaned as well as you could under her hand.

“Just one more time, princess, one more for me,” she commanded.

You followed orders and the knot in your stomach untangled again. You couldn’t say anything but a loud scream of pleasure, as she removed her hand, still not fast enough, and you squirted once more.

She released the grip on your neck and you immediately pulled her in for another sloppy kiss. Your lips smacked as she pulled away, “You’re so fucking hot,” she breathed.

You couldn’t fathom saying anything you were so weak so you settled for the wicked smile. You kissed her once more before going completely limp underneath her.

She sat on her heels next to you. She looked the mess you made underneath your bottom half and chuckled, “We gotta wash the sheets.”

[see-arcane]

we need to stop men from writing about female sexuality i fear

Possibly 😔

Honestly I feel so bittersweet (heavy on the bitter) about this. Because, like. It does have all the best bones of a good supernatural gothic horror. This is clearly a labor of love from Eggers and he put a ton of effort into scoping out visuals and keeping at least the skeleton of Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror at the story's core. I appreciate that. I love that! I adore getting to see actually frightening gothic horror in action, especially since it's so goddamn rare. The last good contemporary film in this vein I can think of is Crimson Peak. And you know what, for clarification: I'm not a prude about having eroticism or sexuality explored in film, horror or otherwise. I am very much pro-monsterfucker.

What kills me about this particular trend with the Draculas and Orloks and whatnot being always always turned into the magnetic sexpire to [INSERT DAMSEL] is that hey.

You guys know that this is Dracula and/or Orlok, right? Famous as they are, they are canonically the Only Two Major Vampires Ever Made whose canon is Explicitly Non-Sexy and Predator-Coded. You remember that, right?

You remember that Mina spent the last third of the novel in existential terror of becoming an undead slave and dragging Jonathan along with her?

You remember that Ellen was not having secret kissy-kissy sexy swoon times over Orlok and her decision to sacrifice herself to save Thomas and the people was all her actions and her planning, not a secret masterminded dark romance ploy aided by un-Van Helsing?

You remember that, right, directors??

Apparently not! Not even Bobby Egg, who languishes about the state of vampires these days, all too sexy and prettified and defanged and romantic for his edgy taste!

Smash cut to it being very thumbs up extra cool when Girl Wants to Get with Vampire (Corpse-looking version so it's fine and innovative now). Which, again, would be, could be done well!

In a film that is not using an already-established heroine as a goth gf stand-in who wanted that Orlok lovin' all along, actually xxxooo

Just...why?

Why can OCs not have their day instead of forcing other folks' public domain characters to contort themselves into directors' personal fanfic puppets?

[ofoceansandtombsanew]

taking away mc ships, what are you shipping in the our life cinematic universe?

okay so mcs are all off the table damn

hhhHHHHNNNNGHHH i had to think about this one for a minute

quick tldr:

lee/ren

derek/ren

baxter/liz

cove/baxter

opal/cliff

vianca/liz

serenity/tamarack

cove/tamarack

derek/tamarack

derek/qiu

okay so my first one might be a hear me out-er butー lee and ren. our sweet cousin lee and ren murray. LIKE CAN Y'ALL SEE MY VISION??? they would be the cutest girlfriends. like, lee is bright and forward but she's gentle and patient enough that ren's shyness wouldn't be something that grates her? and she'd gently coax ren out of her shell

lee doesn't give 'outdoorsy' girl, but she would definitely try out camping and hiking for ren because lee's the type to go out of her way like that. so yeah, definitely ship lee and ren for sure

another compatible person for ren that i can see is derek? like omg that would so fucking cute to me! both of them are sportsy, derek is literally a golden retriever in the shape of a person. he's very considerate and he takes that into account if ren comes over to hang out with his family, knowing when she needs her space

but if derek is putting too much pressure on himself, ren is there to tell him just that. she doesn't say it unkindly though. she just wants her bf to not be his biggest critic. and they love doing any outdoor activity together. when they get their families together, its suarezs versus murrays and afterwards they go to a family restaurant and talk the night away

ironically enough, even though baxter had a canonical crush on qiu when they were kids i don't see it moving past that. it's a crush fond to baxter's heart and he keeps it at that, a fond memory. definitely would never tell them ever. but if i was gonna ship him with anybody in the expansive universe of ol...

hear me out but i feel like liz and baxter would be surprisingly compatible. like, she doesn't take any bs and would get the guy to talk and open up. but if someone comes for him, she is right there in his corner ready to bat for her man. they'd have some good banter as well i think?

i think cove and baxter could also work if it's their step 4 selves. baxter is finally done running away from things and being more genuine and vulnerable and while cove is slow to warm up to people, he would see baxter is trying and slowly but surely their "we only hangout if our mutual friends invite us to the same space" turns into texting each of their own accord and eventually that becomes hanging out of their own accord

then the next thing you know, baxter is asking cove out on a date

oooh yes, i see it more clearly. cove and baxter would be a delicious slowburn for sure, it's drinking and leaving no molecules

i ship opal and yusuf together and i'm really hoping something comes from that when we get the full game however comma.... opal and cliff? i kinda see it and it kinda eats

outside of vianca's canonical gf, vianca and liz give power couple vibes. i don't think i need to expand on that, we all know i'm right and we all know it would eat

if i can't be with my autumn queen tamarack, i would want her to date serenity? they just seem like they would be the cutest cottage core gf/goth gf combination and the two friends in the group that everyone goes to for advice/drama. they gossip about it over tea and still they're the most wholesome couple you know

cove and tamarack also just seem like they'd be very cute together? summer boyfriend meets autumn girlfriend. in a childhood neighbors to friends to lovers type beat, i know they wouldn't get along as their step 1 selves. cove would be pretty put off by how loud and wild tam was at first. plus, neither of them would really like the same activities as the other

tamarack finds the beach boring and stagnant because she's a forest girlie and it isn't like cove is one to just be in the forest and forage mushrooms all day. but during one night when cove tries running away, strangely enough it's the loud girl he doesn't normally enjoy being with sticking with him the whole time and a friendship is birthed from that

step 2, cove is so there for tamarack when she is dealing with everything with her parents. and by step 3, he's telling tamarack he's been in love with with her since they were teens

chef's kiss, cove/tamarack hits different

step 1 derek sees this:

and immediately falls in love, i don't think i need to expand further on that. y'all know how derek is and i feel like everything i said about cove comforting tam can be applied here as well. he'd try to shoot his shot with making a marriage promise with tam too i see it very clearly

and, don't get mad at me for repeating myself but

step 1 derek sees this:

and immediately falls in love. but since qiu is a popular kid, good luck, my guy. at least derek can rest assured knowing that qiu's his good buddy and slightly more special than the rest. i think with qiu he might feel too nervous to do the marriage promise thing since qiu is a popular kid and who knows if he's already received a ton of those

in a scenario where they aren't close as step 1 folk though or qiu pushes derek away during their step 2 phase, derek is hurt but he still tries putting in the effort to rebuild that bridge, letting qiu know he's there regardless of what they're going through until finally... qiu reaches back

they had their ups and their downs but qiu appreciates derek not giving up on them and sticking with them through the hard times

by the time qiu is back to their normal rizzler self, derek's busy with sports and it is hard for them to meet up with each other but they stay in contact. but step 4 would be when they get together because derek let's it drop he had a crush on qiu when they were kids "haha definitely over it NOW though" (he is not)

qiu gains a crush on derek between steps 2 and 3 but never said anything because they kinda felt after being such a jerk to derek during a good chunk of high school, he doesn't deserve to pursue him but after hearing derek had a crush on him qiu decides they're gonna shoot their shot (happy ending ofc though)

i'm leaving terry and randy out of this though, they're too fucking cute for me to separate

[unnervinglyferal]

Saw a thing that made me think of you for some reason. Gonna paste the entire reddit post here rather than link it, because you need to read in real time for the funny:

"My (31M) wife (32F) and I are in a healthy and happy relationship. That said, we’ve been together since high school, so we both feel that we missed out a little by being each others’ only sexual experiences. We’ve talked about this at length and decided a few years ago that we’re ok with having a few hall passes in our relationship, since we very much intend to stay together the rest of our lives and don’t want any resentment over missed possibilites. Plus it’s pretty rare that we could even find such an opportunity, as it’s a little hard to find hookups when you’re in a committed marriage and don’t go out much. We even gave each other advance approval in case a situation arises, so long as we’re safe about it and tell each other immediately afterward. We’ve both used one HP, each with someone we knew well enough but would never see again, and no issues came out of it. In fact, it’s only made us more secure in our relationship and how much we genuinely appreciate being with each other.

Recently, I had to travel to London for work. I don’t normally get to travel for work, so I decided to make a trip out of it and spend a few extra days of my own time in the city after the project was done. My wife couldn’t join because she didn’t have any vacation time left but was very supportive of me taking some time to explore since I’ve never been to London and she has. Being cheap, and being a pretty outgoing guy when I’m so inclined, I decided to stay in a hostel. I was interested in meeting other travelers since I didn’t know anyone in the city and love being sociable with new people. I chatted with several of the people staying there, and in particular a very attractive French girl (mid-20’s) who dressed super goth.

For context, I love the goth girl look. I’ve been sucked into the goth gf propaganda online, much to the annoyance of my wife. It isn’t her style, but she has been nice enough to cater to me by putting on a sexy goth outfit on occasion, since she’s knows it’s a huge fantasy of mine. Still, I pester her constantly to be more goth because I enjoy it so much.

Anyway, I ended up spending a little bit of time with goth French baddie - we both went to the hostel’s happy hour event and hit it off there. I found out that she was recently single and was in London for an art show. It turned out we were both into emo music, and we talked about our favorite bands. I had the thought that she was acting a bit flirty towards me, but didn’t think too much of it, until I later found myself sharing a sink with her in the hostel bathroom.

The hostel was co-ed, so each floor had a small shared bathroom with a communal sink, and a door that was meant to be kept open but which people frequently closed for the sake of having more privacy than just a stall to shower in. So I’m brushing my teeth while chatting up the real-life version of Shadowheart (who, mind you, is wearing an extremely low cut top), when she suddenly closes the bathroom door behind us. In my mind, my wildest fantasy is about to come true. It’s even more exciting because of the adrenaline rush of being in a semi-public setting, and a girl being so into me that she would make such a bold move. I can’t believe this is actually happening to me. I instantly get hard. Then she turns around and asks “Are you interested in learning about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?”

She had me cornered for 10 minutes trying to talk me into salvation, while I grew increasingly despondent and immensely disappointed, with the whiplash of going from what could’ve been one of the crowning moments of my life, to pure and utter dejection.

When I told my wife this story, she laughed for a solid hour. She said it’s karma for annoying her about wanting a goth gf.

TL;DR life dream was to bang a hot goth girl. Thought I was getting the opportunity, but got cockblocked by Jesus Christ. god is real and he hates me."

The fucking mood whiplash. I was reading this nodding along like okay yeah I guess that could be us in like 10 or 15 years, who knows, neither me nor my girl are the jealous type or anything, and then it fucking struck. The christians have weaponized goth girls. Fucking lost it laughing, it's been a rough 24 hours, thank you.

[thefaeriefeatherdark]

I am so glad to hear someone else honest enough to admit the "BBrae" relationship is just not good. While I completely agree with everything you said, I also feel like it keeps persisting because of how it can be shoehorned into one or more of 3 boring relationship dynamics: 1. dog-like man/cat-like woman (i.e.- the sitcom relationship) 2. Turning beast boy into an empty shell for the reader to project themselves into so they can imagine having a hot goth GF or 3. #wholesome girlfriend/boyfriend

I mean. The fact is that there is a larger element to this issue which is.

Raven isn't a goth.

She's not even close to a fucking Goth.

She's probably the least Goth of the Teen Titans. She's distinctly a spiritualist person, her actual clothing she wears is all wool and is made up of bright colors. Even her costume is pretty solidly white for large chunks of the NTT era.

The only place she's ever been Goth is in the Teen Titans 03 show and stuff drawing on it after.

Like, the relationship they want her to have with Gar flies in the face of her actual characterization. At the same time it's just... boring? Like Gar and Raven dating doesn't add anything to the team?

The Starfire and Nightwing dynamic is fairly clearly established by their differing moral codes and expectations.

Starfire is more violent and emotional, but she's also more carefree. Nightwing is tactical and withdrawn, he tends to be more morally rigid, and tends to get caught up in worrying about things. Those present as clear differences, there's conflict there as well as the romantic basis no matter what.

Raven and Changeling don't really have that? I guess Changeling could be argued to be more murderous? Or more lighthearted? But it also just feels wrong? Raven is pretty open about her emotions and lighthearted after the destruction of Trigon and being saved from Brother Blood. She's more certain of herself and more openly emotional both in her joy and sadness. Same deal with Changeling to some extent, but not enough for an actual parallel.

Like where is the conflict or narrative to these characters if they're being written correctly as a relationship? At the same time, where do they actually click?

It's not just empty, it's literally a ship aimed at two different characters.

I'll also just throw out there that I think that most characters are in better places across the board when they're aloud to have romances outside of other Superheroes. Or at least if you're doing two Superheroes in a romance on the team do something interesting with that... but I've never really seen anything interesting done with Raven and Changeling.

[papercutsunset]

Hi parchment

Please describe your current wip (you decide what that means) in bullet points. They can get out of hand, that's fine.

more like... p-arby-ment (it wasn't funny, let's move on)

im typing something for kay gets cursed, so let's uh. yeah. that's the one

mix between monster hunting, fairy tale shit, and memory fuckery. also spiders

kay's a goth autopsy technician working in the basement of lake wonder's hospital and living with her mechanic gf mikey above the garage.

"swing" by taking back sunday

makes sense to me (it's romantic somehow. don't ask)(they're both fucked up. it's canon that they [redacted] and then went on a date after)

one catch: kay's got a shitty-ass curse that makes her eat living people when it can (WHOOPS)

so she goes and talks to a witch

it's christmas! you're gonna talk to a witch!

(it's actually early december. the point still stands)

whoops, now you're More Cursed

"i don't wanna be me" by type o negative

what's this? denny's also here

listen, it makes sense. we need someone familiar with this kind of thing, but it has to be denny

"pork and beans" by weezer

tiff's too smart to be here. sorry.

she's still there, though. kinda. they call her. she turns into a frog. normal shit.

("everything is going great" by tiny stills)

ok tiff is done now (lying)(you'll see her later)(she's in florida. don't worry about it.)

anyway, denny is still kinda feeling weird about what happened at the end of TGE when she bit through chip winger's neck while she and eddy were falling out a window (tiff's the one who asked her to be there anyway, whatever)

so denny gets dragged into it because she helps kay free her bicycle from these weird thorns around the tires

turns out they're both stuck in the woods. WHOOPS AGAIN

you know that relatable moment when an ax won't leave you alone so you call your best friend who you're kinda-sorta in love with so she can give you a ride, and then you have to send her away because her jacket turns red? #believewomeniguess??

"spellbound" by lacuna coil

instead, they call tiff, who is at a wendy's, and she theorizes about fairy tales. and then denny's phone dies, so they go to denny's grandpa's shitass cabin she's still trying to fix to wait out the snow

and then. you know. they wake up in an entirely different world in entirely different clothes and entirely different roles.

"fractured fairytale" by blackbriar

what do you do? you start in a fucking tavern

so kay yells at denny in an alleyway

imagine a, what

how tall is kay?

i don't remember. she's like 5'3 or something. i would have to check my notes (whatever)

imagine a tiny goth girl pinning a woman a foot taller than her to a wall out of anger and panic because they're in some WEIRD FAIRY TALE WORLD

anyway they slowly learn this is a completely different version of events than what they're used to. kay is analagous to this lost princess of the fallen, cursed kingdom they're in, and denny is analagous to the daughter of a local monster hunter who uh... killed his daughter... whoops again? ("big bad wolf" by in this moment)

none of this is spoiler territory btw. it's central to the conceit.

so they slowly start trying to fix this, because they figure that freeing this land from its curse will get them back to lake wonder (where they neeeeeed to be actually)

that takes them out to the woods, where they run into spiders and monsters and shit

listen, it's cursed. it's all fucked up versions of things they're familiar with. is jumbo there? WHO KNOWS.

(duckie is. in what capacity, im not sure)

anyway shit goes weird in the woods. we're not going to get spoilery HERE. tldr is that denny feels weird about these beasts that are in the woods and kay eats a raw rabbit and also thinks she hears her dad everywhere

memory fuckery starts here, too.

you WILL think about your dad and you WILL like it (lying)

(dan roth sucked. david mcfadden is canonically mediocre.)(also kay gets a bow here. something something "hunting with your dad as bonding gone weird, not clickbait")

they get back to the town when the beasts refer to something worse than they are coming for them in the woods (something has been disturbed! WHOOPS AGAIN)

so they head back to town and look for a place to stay the night, meaning that kay looks for somewhere to stay the night and sends denny to the apothecary because SOMEONE (cough denny cough) won't stop getting HURT

healing fast means nothing if your wounds get infected, forehead

so denny goes to the apothecary

kay church scene.jpg

(kay sees some thematic stained glass. the cursed princess (alternate kay) and her prince (alternate mikey). the fallen wicked king (alt dan), the queen/the king (kay's mom and stepdad)("skeletons" by new years day)(don't ask how)

anyway denny goes to the apothecary. who's that? it's tiff. it's also not tiff. she's turning herself into a frog. WHOOPS AGAIN. she's interested in the described curses and she and denny go to track down kay (also they can stay with her tonight, who CARES)(irena's back. that's alternate jessie. she keeps touching denny's scars)

conflict at the chruch as the Thing finally catches up to them

and what's this? the town hates you? yeah, you fucking werewolf. DUH.

anyway more conflict, and more conflict, and more conflict. bittersweet ending. etc etc.

my neck hurts!!!!!!!!

my POINT being: a study of monstrosity and what it means to be monstrous through this lens of stories told and subverted, and also denny is an idiot,

END POST

"audrey, honey.." by sarah and the safe word

[bitemedotmp3]

Uzi doesn't just go on a face journey. Her expressions go on a full-on book trilogy-turned-movie series, followed by a reboot fifteen years later. At first, her brow is just knit in gentle concern and confusion (Mika has a girlfriend? A goth girlfriend? That's what seeing someone means, right?) as Mika recounts recent events, and then her eyes go hollow in shock.

Mika's goth gf turned into a worker drone? Lots of people had changed over the recent weeks; Uzi had as well, but she kind of wished Mika had told her about that. And then there's mentions of a shape and blood and oil and robo-cannibalism and wings and oh my Robo-God she really wishes Mika had mentioned something when it was still happening. If Uzi was there, maybe she could've-

Nah, pointless to think about what-ifs. Whatever had happened was over, and Uzi's lack of feathers was proof of that. Even if that other girl had died, she'd be back by now, right? Uzi follows Mika as the girl wanders through the house, and she eventually takes a seat at the table adjacent to her.

"Wow, that's... That's a lot, Mika. I'm, uh, I'm sorry you had to go through all that. If it makes you feel better, you- No, that's..."

She trails off, biting her lip. There are reasons, excuses even, for what Mika had to do. Rationalizations that she can tell herself that might help, even if only a little. Uzi's had those too: she's a hormonal teenager, she doesn't know any better, it's better than doing nothing, she couldn't control herself, she'd been manipulated, she was hungry and hot and her classmates smelled so tasty-

It never really helps. You still did those things.

Uzi sighs. "For... whatever it's worth, you probably couldn't have helped her. If you hadn't done something, she probably would've just killed you, and then killed some other people too. Then she would've run out of juice and shut down anyways. Think of it as a mercy kill, if it helps. I dunno."

There's no reason to hide this from Mika, so she doesn't. "The stuff you're describing, I... I think I know what happened. You mentioned a shape, was it this one?"

The symbol of the Absolute Solver flashes over one of her eyes. "It's something from my world that- I-it's hard to explain. Easiest way to think of it is that it infected her and made her act not like herself. The wings, the blood, the... the cannibal stuff, that's all related."

A grimace stretches across her face, because she doesn't know how Mika will react. Hopefully Uzi doesn't get a faceful of bullets. "It happened to me, too. I mean, it's still happening. I just have a handle on it."

She has a vision of the girl's crumpled body lying wherever Mika had left it. Abandoned scrap metal, probably just hauled away to the junkyard- Is it still there? No, let's not bring that up.

"But, like, it's all done now, right?" she says, forcing a smile. "City's back to normal. If you guys are dating, I'm sure she didn't wanna hurt you either. So... Why not just text her? Maybe she's been crying about this too."

"Ehehe...yeah I guess you're right. You telling me to do anything is already like the world flipped itself upside down."

Still as much as Mika wanted to dance around the point it was truly never going to get better unless she told anyone the horrific experience she went through. And she almost forgot that the mechanical individual didn't need to eat, so at least whatever was in the fridge would work out well.

"...I never got to tell you but shortly around the time you came here I was seeing a girl around my age." Mika said as she slowly wandered on out of the room, making her way to the kitchen almost slowly as possible. "She was definitely worse off, always talking about death and love and trusting people. At the very least I was doing my best to help her out in any way I can."

Even if it didn't feel like anything was helping she did see some signs Nier was doing somewhat better. And there was still the opportunity to meet whatever entity seemed to be protecting her as well.

"Then of course a few days ago we met again. It was during the weird time when the Stars were doing their usual thing. I knew something was off because well..." How did she say this without her thinking she was already going crazy.

"...She looked like you Uzi. Mechanical and droney. I...didn't want to bring it up to her in case she freaked out but then she started acting weird. She saw a shape at the museum and started convulsing, bleeding and coughing up oil on the floor. And then she asked to eat me, like she ate her parents to help cool down..." Even at the table Mika took a seat and curled her legs up in a ball, knowing full well that the burns were both a combination of attempting to comfort them on top of Nier's own advances.

"...I-I-I shot her. Wings sprouted from somewhere and I hesitated but it was one of us. And then she was overheating from something and I didn't know what to do! By the time everything was over there was nothing on her face. I just ran away...leaving her there and ran back here."

Try as she might tears started to fall from Mika's eyes, knowing that despite everything she couldn't do anything in the end to save them. Whether anyone trashed the body or it still laid there was anyone's guess as well. But above all these things was the idea that there was nothing apparent to her to help comfort Nier beyond her own life.

"I locked the door and shut off my phone. I sat on my bed and hoped and prayed it was a nightmare. But everytime I think back to it, I realized just how real it was. And most of all I failed to protect her as well..."

[goneagainlol]

🄶🄴🄽🅂🄷🄸🄽 🅂🄷🄸🄿🅂 🄸 🅂🄷🄸🄿 🄰🅂 🅂🄴🄽🅃🄴🄽🄲🄴🅂

jeanlisa- mega flirt x oblivious workaholic, they act like a married couple 24/7 even if one of them doesn't realize it

zhongluc- dragon x phoenix, successful businessman x successful businessman, emotionless but tries to show emotion x emotional but tries to hide it, need i say more?

lumber- amber was in love at first sight, lumine thought she was annoying asf at first until she started to grow on her, slowburn at its finest

beigguang- smexy lawful queen x smexy rebellious pirate, they pretend to hate each other but (not-so)secretly think the other is the hottest thing since the big bang

eimiko- inazumas resident hot manipulative women, power couple / refined gays that have everyone licking their shoes

collber- best friends to lovers at its finest, i dont care if theyre gfs or platonic soulmates but they are literally the same person and therefore are perfect for eachother

kaebedo- another case of monstadt's signature flirt x oblivious workaholic, literal mlm jeanlisa with a drop of angst, couldnt be more perfect

chili- clingy flirt x emotionless blockhead, zhongli doesn't know what childe's doing half the time but is head over heals for him anyways

ganqing- rex lapis no. 1 fan x rex lapis anti, domestic enemies to lovers, probs one of the healthiest relationships in genshin if cooked right *chefs kiss*

monafischl- controversial, but if we established mona and fischl's ages then this has great potential, light hair goth witch x dark hair goth witch too and i believe that speaks for itself

xingyun- golden boys in love but they're too "he sees me only as his best friend><" to realize it, aka the epitome of slowburn childhood friends to lovers aka my downfall

kaether- kaeya's a flirt, aether doesnt take no shit, kaeya is in turn smitten. sprinkle in some angst in the form of miscommunication and youre set

kukitto- dumb-as-a-rock himbo bisexual x bamf bisexual who probably has a perfect sat score, shinobu is definitely done with the arataki gangs shit but itto is like a clingy-but-deadly newfoundland who thinks its the size of a chihuahua and shinobu is grudgingly infatuated

xiaother- love at first sight, "lovers oath" literally plays in the background of their first meeting. dump a bucket of angst in with xiao's hopeless devotion, while aether cant offer his whole heart bc his main goal is finding his sister. it doesnt get much gayer than this folks

zhongven- an old married couple, literally. the definition of "only you understand me" because they're the last gods still hanging around in teyvat (minus raiden but we dont talk about her) so it's a ship practically starved for an angsty reincarnation au

chaeya- they tried to out-flirt eachother and ended up falling for eachother in the process, plus the fact that childe is a harbinger adds some angsty spice

chiscara- "i hate you, do you hate me?" "no, i hate YOU, do you hate me?" and they were husbands

yelfei- "sorry about my gf over there she-" "WHATD YOU SAY PUNK?!" "nothing, dear^^" "oh ok pookie^^"

cynbedo- both crazy smart workaholics, they'd bond over sharing scientific theories and other scholarly things. plus the fact that lisa originally studied in sumeru and is friends with cyno, she could totally set them up

dehlou / nihya- hydro x pyro, gentle femme x bamf femme, not much source material for them yet but i dare you to tell me with a straight face they aren't already perfect for each other

shelan- if shenhe is chongyun's aunt, and yelan is xinqiu's aunt, then that means theyre gay for each other. do the math

[raevenlywrites]

Do you know how to sew poll

My tags

#church youth group by hand#punishment for being kicked out of school by machine

@inscrutably-coy tags

#i've done both but I'm not great at either#also raev I want to hear this story

Not that interesting I'm afraid. I was kicked out of my last two weeks of senior year and my mom thought I did it to spite her so she insisted I still learn something with those last two weeks so she made me learn how to sew (we worked together on some basic peasant tops and skirts I wore to renfair later that summer)

...okay, maybe it is that interesting? Lemme set the scene

The year is 2004. 9/11 is still very fresh in the small minds of my small rural town, and the powers that be (vice principal with little man complex) already hate me bc I'm goth and smarter than he is etc etc.

Be Me. Be voted "Delightfully Different" for the year book superlatives. Goth it up for picture day bc I know why tf I got voted this way. Give the people what they want. Dress like the motherfucking Crow.

(Fun aside, my now wife then girlfriend and I are responsible for SEVERAL amendments to the school dress code, including a beautiful line about "no trench coats, dusters, cloaks, opera capes, or other such outwear that hits below the knee. anyway)

Be me again, sick but at school bc that's how it fucken works. gotta train up teh work force etc etc. So i'm sick, tired, and in my fucking pjs bc fuck that noise. Get pulled out of homeroom by the wardrobe police (librarian) and be fed some bullshit line about how my pics for the year book "didn't turn out". On a digital camera. Bitch fuck you. whatever. take my picture, get out of my face, i hate you all.

Back in homeroom, buddy asks me what that was all about. me, grumpy, explains the above bullshit. complains, goes to last period.

get called to the office

principal mc inferiority complex stares at me, I stare at him. he asks if I have any idea why i'm here. i had honestly assumed it was to receive another scholarship and have my pic taken for the news paper, as has already happened a few times this month. smart senior, remember? so I just stare. Prin. Bullshit tries to do a hard ass routine, all cop drama style, am I sure I don't know why i'm here etc etc. I honestly have no idea and say as much. Something I said maybe? he asks smugly. Nope, no bells my dude. Something threatening?

Dear reader, I am truly lost. I'm sick, have a headache the size of texas, and just wanna go back to choir, the one period I share with my gf. I finally do the adult thing (sad but one of us had to be) and tell him I truly have no idea why I'm here so if he could just tell me we could both move on with our days.

He tells me a fellow student overheard me making a bomb threat.

I am floored. I do not recall saying such a thing because I didn't fucking say such a thing. I go over my conversations in my head, and it is only now after the fact that I realize what I must have said. in my tired teen tirade, I invoked the dreaded columbine and said something to the effect of "[in regards to my goth wear] it's like they're afraid I'm going to shoot up the school or something".

I really don't remember if I pieced that together there or later. I truly didn't care. Old dude says they can sett me up with ISS (in school suspension) which would take a week to set up so I'd only be in there for like three days anyways, or, and this is clearly his smug preference, I got home and never set foot on school property again.

This is, of course, the dream scenario. Finals are done; this last two weeks of school is seniors dicking around and practicing for graduation. I have no interest in any of this. It does not feel lik ea celebration or milestone to have slept my way through four years of high school. I gleefully accept his terms and drive myself home in my hot pink geo tracker I wrecked so that mom would let me paint it purple while it was in the body shop anyways (trying to impress a girl. it clearly worked, she married me)

Mom is furious. Swears I did this on purpose. I wish I had thought of it, honestly. Two weeks of crash course home ec ensue. I learn to sew on a machine and wear adorably bland peasant top to ren fair.

Graduation comes, I don't go (banned from school property). Friends after teh fact tell me that 1) the choir doesn't sing alma mater bc my beautiful gf refused to sing w/o me present, and we were the alto section. Popular girl in my grade who is unthinkably sweet and everyone loves and we were on the basketball team together in 7th grade goes on and on about how awful the person who made up lies about me must be and how terrible they must feel etc etc. Snitch is in that class, has to heard it, wants to die on the spot. Absentee victory.

See above where I was smart. Top 10 in my class. Announcer goes to read the students names. "Announcing, the top 10 graduates of 2004. Number 9..." Just skipped right the fuck over me. Goddamned hilarious.

So basically this is the story of how the adults in my life made fools of themselves and I had my Ferris Buehler's Day Off of it all.

And also sewed my younger sibling a monkey for their birthday.

[stevenbasic]

“So are we done vandalizing my beautiful new website?” Marisela Vazquez asked, a typical turn on her typically long-suffering smile as she sat at her Office Manager’s desk early that Saturday evening. She’d just had her Tito’s-and-cranberry topped off once again by her new blonde friend, Amelia, and was now drinking what was basically pinkly-tinted vodka over melted ice. Amelia strutted over to the couch, a tipsy sway to her broad hips...

They definitely shouldn’t be doing this, altering the “Meet our Staff” page of the practice website while drinking, but Marisela had to admit it was kinda fun. Josie and Lakshmi? “Babygirl” and “Boom Boom”? Herself as the Big Titty Goth GF? Kinda stupid but what the hell, right? Silly, just the vodka talking…but what they’d done to his pic was particularly evil haha. Will he see it? Do I care? EDM poured out of the speakers perched in the corners, and the three had all kicked off their heels.

“No no no, we still have to do that new Katarina girl,” Randi insisted, bouncing up and down on her toes but then sitting down again on Melissa’s desk, turning the widescreen monitor towards herself, “Did you see how much she pumped yesterday at her desk? She even calls herself a cow.”

“Moooooo…” Amelia brayed, tossing her long platinum hair, swaying to the music on her seat on the couch. She’d decided, against her better judgment, to skip her typical Saturday manicure so she could hang out and get drunk with Marisela and Randi after a long afternoon working with Melissa and those girls from Evolution on the construction plans. They’d just hijacked Melissa’s gorgeous new office for their impromptu little party and had - at Randi’s suggestion - taken to jokingly adding nicknames to everyone’s portraits on the company site, replacing the already-inappropriate pictures with new, even racier images. It felt a little like being in high school again, the girls at the cool table laying into the yearbook with a sharpie, but she had to admit it was pretty hilarious. She’d even come up with the “Big Barbie Bimbo Bitch” thing herself.

“Omigod fine…” Marisela huffed, shaking her head and laughing as she laid again into the code. “Mooooo…” she repeated, drunkenly, as Randi searched for the crazy-big boob pic she’d snapped of Katarina yesterday. The girl was good at keeping tons of images on her phone; the photoshopped “MOUTH” one of herself was a particularly good find. Melissa will probably find this all funny, Marisela thought to herself, but of course I’ll have to revert this all back to my archived files by Monday.

“I’m freakin’ plastered,” Amelia offered, marveling at how far they’d made it into the second bottle of vodka, which sat on the low coffee table alongside its empty twin.

“Haha me too…” Marisela agreed, snapping the chest-shot of Katarina that Randi had just emailed her into place, adjusting the new, luridly red text over the old copy. She was drunk, but she felt great. Invigorated.

“Haha omigod this is rich…” Randi snickered, eyes narrowing and pulling up a new text from Melissa, “Missy just told me he’s upstairs, and we’re being too loud for him. We’re making him nervous..!”

“She wants us to stop?” Marisela asked.

“She didn’t say that,” Randi smiled, “she just said he’s trying to sleep haha.”

“Long day alone, jerking off?” Amelia offered, dryly, “Little guy needs a nap?”

“Fuck that,” Randi answered, swiping off her phone to slip it down her top and stand, abruptly, from the desk, “let’s go get him!!”

Marisela’s thighs had started to tingle…

[thoughtfullyluckyperson]

I’m gonna be that person but whole “Light had hot goth gf with big boobies and lingerie and was indifferent to her therefore he must be gay” theme is starting to irk me. Especially in context of said hot goth gf being also an obsessive stalker who basically blackmailed him into relationship with her, threatened to kill his other potential love interests out of jealousy and almost got him caught and executed a few times. Oh, and she brought with her a shinigami who threatened to kill him if he’s not enthusiastic enough in playing her boyfriend. What’s not to love, indeed. I would run away screaming as soon as I could, lingerie or no lingerie.

That’s not to add that 1) Light is a prideful control freak who 100% felt furious and humiliated being cornered like this (and Misa didn’t outwit him on her own like L whom he could grudgingly respect even when angry, no, she just got power over him by sheer dumb luck), and he is so not a type to forgive and forget, 2) she’s his polar opposite personality-wise and he dislikes her airheadness and loudness and lack of seriousness even when he’s amnesiac, she wouldn’t have had a chance even if they met normally. They’re just exceptionally unsuitable as a couple and that’s kinda the whole point, one more shounen trope deconstructed.

And were the situation to gender-switch to girl!Light and guy!Misa with everything else staying the same, I’m kinda sure everyone would talk about what a cool trope subversion it is and be like “for once the girl does the sane thing and despises and uses her stalker instead of falling for him, you go queen!”. But when a guy does this, he’s either misogynist or gay, no other versions (like, that he’s a victim here and actually has common sense). Double standards stronk. Whatever she did to him, he is still supposed to madly desire her if she’s conventionally attractive. Because men are animals, everyone knows, they see boobs - they don’t see anything else. They’re not people who can have types, can be picky or be, y’know, turned off by a clingy annoying behavior or even stalking and threats. Self-control doesn’t exist too, apparently. Or is it a “if he uses her as the eyes, should as well use her sexually, what a waste” logic?

(Tbh, I was more surprised that he didn’t kill her in the second arc when she became useless and there was no Rem to threaten him. He was well on his way to insanity already and could enjoy his belated vengeance. When I watched the show first time I was almost sure that after Rem’s death Misa’s done for. But she wasn’t dangerous to him and he still had some boundaries left, I guess. Takada was probably added to illustrate that, he clearly liked her better out of two of them on personal level. Yet he dropped Takada off a cliff as soon as she became a potential danger but spared Misa who he had personal grudge against but who was currently harmless).

[darkdevasofdestruction]

When They Meet Your Ex

Risotto Nero

Risotto would crush your ex’s head between his goth gf tiddies if he ever tries to get anywhere close to you.

You were on a park date on a late evening, not wanting to attract attention, but Risotto’s hat bells seemed to attract all the attention from passer-bys...

And by that, I mean cute little stray kittens would tried climbing up his pants to reach the bells.

Seeing you giggle at that, he only sighed and with the ghost of a smile, he suggested you sit down by the tree and play with the kittens.

It was all super cute at the beginning, seeing your lovely smile made his heart go WRYYYY with happiness, but that was rather short lived.

“Huuh? Y/N, that you? What are you doing with that weird looking clown? And why do you look like you’re wearing his way too large and washed out Metallica Tshirt?” hearing that familiar voice, you gasped and looked up, only to see the irritating face of your ex. “Honestly...Can’t I get a nice and quiet night without you around? Actually, why did you even stop? Come on, go away! I don’t feel like killing my braincells speaking to you again.” you humphed, looking away from him. “Awe, don’t be so hostile with me, babe! You definitely weren’t like that some time ago.” he smirked, as your eye twitched in annoyance. “Don’t call me that! It’s disgusting hearing that coming from your filthy mouth! You lost that privilege long ago!” your voice was lower, dripping with poison with each word. “I don’t think you should be speaking to me like that, considering how much you downgraded. Were you that desperate that you just forced yourself on the first person you saw?” he asked in a patronising voice. “I’m not you to force myself on people who don’t like me.” your voice even harsher now, but your big tiddy goth gf decided to step in. “To think that someone like you would speak like that about my girlfriend in front of me...You sure are a dumb fuck.” Risotto’s deep and dark voice echoed through the park as he stood down, towering over your ex. “Y-You’re not that scary, y’know?” your ex stuttered out those words, but that only made your boyfriend smirk. “Is that so...? Y/N, do I have your permission to teach this shrimp a lesson? No Stand needed, just my fists.” he asked, cracking his knuckles. “Permission granted. Just give me a good view of his blood flying around and I’ll be happy. I’ve been dreaming for this guy to get beat up for so long!” you giggled, leaning down on the tree with a relaxed look, with kittens all over you, as you enjoyed the show, your sweet boyfriend cursing the bastard over and over again, with each punch.

By the end of it, after making sure there’s no more blood on his hands and the jerk ran away, you called him to put his head on your lap, and kissed him tenderly, a smirk on your face.

“Who’d have thought that the best revenge is served bloody.” you chuckled, playing with his beautiful silver hair. “I would know.” he said simply, letting out a calm exhale.

---

Bruno Buccellati

You were at the restaurant with the team, as Bruno was away on a little errand and asked you to make sure the gang doesn’t destroy the restaurant, which wouldn’t really be a surprise, to say the least, but still.

“Okay, Narancia, I know you can do it. This is pretty easy, but you have to focus and take it one step at a time. What is 5 x 6? Take your time.” you asked sweetly, as you stood behind Narancia’s chair, your arms around his neck, your chin resting on the top of his head as he kept thinking and trying to count on his fingers. “Uh....30! Right? Right?” he asked energetically. “Yes, that’s right, congrats! And now, how much is 9 x 7? I know it’s a bit more difficult, but take you time and you’ll get it right!” I tried to hype him up, which made Mista and Fugo chuckle. “I honestly don’t have a clue how you can have so much patience with that braindead idiot.” Fugo complained, leaning back on his chair. “OI! WHO’RE YA CALLING A BRAINDEAD IDIOT?!” Naracia jumped on his feet as if electrocuted, which made me gasp and throw my arms around his torso, trying my best to keep him from fighting with Fugo. “Guys, settle down already! You don’t want to give Bruno trouble, do you?” I tried to reason, but they were long gone in their own word, while Mista was laughing, Giorno was pretending he didn’t know them and Abbacchio was ignoring us by listening to music. “Woaw...You’re a mess as always. Who are these guys anyway? Your groupies? Nah, these 2 seem way too young for that...They couldn’t be your kids, could they?!” a weirdly familiar voice called out from the entrance of the private space where we ate our meals, which made everyone stop what they were doing, snapping their heads towards the new person. “Oh...It’s you. Great, my day can’t get any worse, can it?” I dragged my hand down my face in aggravation. “So they ARE your children! What the hell, you said you didn’t want any children! I begged you so much, and you still denied me! And now?! What the hell, Y/N?!” he shouted, his eyes wide with shock. “These guys are 15 and 17, so if you can come up with a viable explanation on how I, at Y/A years old, could possibly have them as children, then congratulations, you win. Otherwise, I have to say, you’re the most braindead person I’ve ever met...Which wouldn’t be a surprise, considering everything.” I sighed, walking in front of him, staring him down, despite the height difference. “And who do you think you are, speaking to me like that, you little bitch?!” he screamed in your face. “Oi, Y/N, need a little help beating up this guy?” Abbacchio’s low voice called out, but you merely shook your head. “Nah, this is more personal. Listen, idiot, you aren’t allowed here. Restaurant’s rules. This place is reserved only for us, so get your sorry ass away from here before I kick you...Not that you wouldn’t like it, seeing how much of a masochistic freak you are.” you growled, pushing your finger into his chest repeatedly, to make him step way, but he grabbed your wrists tightly. “I think I’ll be leaving this place with you-” he began to speak, before a hand grasped his shoulder from behind so hard that he yelped in shock and pain.

“Now, now, I think mia bella told you already that this is a private place and you should leave. Unfortunately for you, you were stupid enough to touch her, so now you must suffer the consequences for your actions.” Bruno, glaring at the jerk, grabbed him by the shirt and threw him out of the restaurant, before talking to someone on the phone and returning to you, kissing your temple and holding his arm around you protectively, as he guided you back to the table. “Are you my guardian angel, Bruno? You always come to my aid when I need it the most, yet least expect it.” you chuckle, leaning your elbow on the table and gazing at him with a tender look. “I’d say it’s the other way around, but I won’t complain either way. Don’t worry about him, he won’t bother you again, I made sure of that.” he held your hand, intertwining your fingers together, before leaning on his chair, smirking at the others. “How did they behave today?” “On their best behaviour, of course! They are always little angels, and look! Narancia’s getting better at multiplying!” I clap in glee, showing him the new pages in his notebook. “Great job, Narancia, well done! And you, Fugo, for not getting angry at him.” Bruno praised them, but the two only shared a look of unease, as they laughed awkwardly, nodding.

--- Abbacchio Leone

You and Abbacchio were enjoying your day off together at a little cafe in town, knowing very well that none of the guys would bother you the whole day, so you were both pretty happy with that.

Your hand was over his, on the table, as you discussed random bands and were hyped about upcoming concerts in Italy that you were definitely going to together and would buy matching merch that you could wear and flaunt off how cool the two of you were together.

The problem is, however, when someone suddenly put their hands on your shoulders, making you jolt in your seat in surprise, before twisting behind to see who it was -

Only to have the misfortune of seeing your ex.

“Oh great, just what I needed. I got rid of the gang’s annoying antics, but I have to see another, much worse...Argh, whatever, I won’t even bother. Just leave, I don’t want to deal with you.” you roll my eyes, turning back to Abbacchio, obviously with a dramatic hair flip. “Awww, come on, admit that you missed me. I mean, what is this? Your new goth girlfriend, or what? I know I’m irreplaceable in your heart, but come on, no need to pretend that you don’t miss me.” he smirks, sitting on the empty chair next to you. “Oh, bother...” you facepalmed, looking at your boyfriend with an exasperated look. “Your tea is ready, sir, madam. Cherry Vanilla with extra Cinnamon.” the waiter put the teapot on the table, along with two cute little purple cups. “I am sorry, I thought it would be only the two of you. Should I bring another cup for the new sir?” the waiter asked politely, and while you were ready to deny, but Leone was faster than you. “Yes, please.” he answered simply, making you widen your eyes at him, but seeing his mischievous smirk, you realised his plan, which made you put your hand over your mouth to stifle your giggles. “You are very polite, dear Leone. More polite than I could ever be, I must confess.” you confessed, which earned a condescending laugh from your ex. “Well, you were never that much of a kind girl to begin with, Y/N, but that’s why I love you! We complete each other so well! I’m the good one, you’re the bad one...!” he trailed on, until the waiter brought the 3rd cup, and your ex tried to reach for the tea cup, but you slapped his hand away. “Go wash your hands! You can’t sit at the table with dirty hands! I don’t really care if you do it when you’re by yourself, but you should know by now that I’m hygene-obsessed!”  you tried to reason without drawing suspicion to yourself. “Jeez...Can’t believe I stayed with a nagging bitch like you for so long...” he muttered under his breath, but got up and left for the bathroom anyway. “This is gonna be fun.” you giggled, as you poured the tea for for you and Leone, before putting the teapot back. “Now’s my part.” he smirked, as you looked away, giggling, not even able to stop as you imagined how funny it’d be. “I’m back now, babe! Did you miss me~?” he asked in what seemed to be a very failed smooth act, which made you scoff. “You wish.” you snorted, looking away. “Ah...You didn’t pour me tea too, how rude. Well, nevermind, it’s not like you ever had any initiative anyway.” he got the teapot and poured himself a cup, as you and Abbacchio sipped at the same time. “How do you like it?” you giggle, looking at him as he took a big sip from his cup, before gulping and choking. “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?! IT TASTES HORRIBLE!” he yelled at you, as you could barely stop yourselves from laughing. “It’s tea, what else could it be?” you smirked, watching his angry expression, as he tried to leap towards you, but Abbacchio was much faster, taking him by the scruff of his blouse and kicking him out, getting him banned from the cafe, before turning back and sitting with a large smirk on his face. “That was such a great success.” you laughed, high-fiving your smug boyfriend. “Nobody messes with my girlfriend...And honestly, this trick didn’t work with Giorno, so it just had to work with this idiot.” he chuckled lowly, before throwing away the remaining piss-tea and ordering another kind of hot beverage. “We’re the perfect duo, baby.” you kissed his lips while giggling slightly, before getting back to your seat and continuing your conversation from where you left it.

---

Kujo Jotaro

Today had been a very nice and peaceful day for Jotaro, and he intended on keeping it that way.

His mother didn’t annoy him too much with her goodbye kiss, the groupie that kept following him everywhere was rather tame today, not clinging on him as much, the teachers didn’t annoy him, the weather was fine, you promised to meet him in the park after school, with a bento prepared for the both of you, while helping him with some studies.

All went so well so far.

You were happy, and your bright smile managed to even put a smile on his face, and you two sat at the base of a very large and old oak tree, as you fed him the bento you cooked, and after that, you let him put his hat on your head, something he absolutely adored and made his heart beat faster, as he’d put his head on your lap and would let you stroke his hair, as you’d chat randomly and watch the clouds.

Everything was so perfect...

Or so Jotaro hoped.

But there just can’t be a perfect day without something bad happening.

Just as you leaned down to plant a soft kiss on Jotaro’s forehead, some people started approaching you. At first, neither of you thought anything of it, thinking it was just random people passing by, but that was far from the truth.

“Oi, oi! Who’s that over there? It that Kujo? With a girl?” the obnoxious voice echoed through the park, and while Jotaro was merely annoyed, you unintentionally remembered the voice, and flinched in annoyance. “Great, just what I needed today.” you grumbled, tipping the front of your hat, a habit you took from your boyfriend. “Yare Yare Daze...Do you know them?” Jotaro asked in a low voice, getting up and glaring at the 3 boys walking over. “Yeah...That bastard in the middle is my ex. Kill me now.” you sighed, hiding your face completely with the hat that was already extra large on you. “Ah! No way, is that you? Really? Y/N? What the hell? Didn’t you keep preaching how you wanted a smart boyfriend? Tsk...I knew it. You really aren’t as smart as you think you are.” he shook his head, whisking away the hat, making you immediately jolt to your feet, trying to get the hat away. “Get that back! Come on, don’t be a jerk! It’s not even mine, you have no right to take it away! Just give me the hat and go away, I really didn’t want to see you again!” you reached up, trying to get the hat, but it was out of your reach. “Only if you give me a kiss. Come one, Y/N, you broke up with me in such bad terms, why not make it better?” he tried to reach his hand towards you, but you slapped it away hard. “Don’t even think of touching me, you jerk! You don’t deserve anything!” you stepped back, glaring at him, but you didn’t realise you bumped into someone, until you looked up and noticed it was Jotaro. “You have 3 seconds to give back my hat and run away.” he threatened, but your ex was having none of it. “And who the hell do you think you are? Her little play toy? Don’t you know? He loves to play around until she gets bored! And then she’ll just throw you away like garbage! Come on, man, I’m looking out for a bro here!” your ex tried to reason, but Jotaro was having none of it. “I don’t appreciate trash like you talking like that about my girlfriend. You have 2 more seconds before you’re dead.” Jotaro glared threateningly at them, putting you behind him protectively. “E/N, man, you don’t know him? He’s Kujo Jotaro, he’s known in the whole city for beating everyone up, even teachers. He never lost a fight! I wouldn’t go against him!” one of his friends explained, backing away from him, not wanting to get caught up in this mess. “One...” Jotaro stepped forward, grasping the front of your ex’s shirt. “Fine, whatever, here’s your stupid hat, now let me go!” your ex threw the hat at him, which he grabbed with his other hand and gave it to you. “Time’s up.” Jotaro smirked slightly, cracking his fists. “What?! You said you’d let me go!” your ex seemed to have fear flashing in his eyes as he tried to step back. “I said you have 3 seconds to return the hat AND run away.” and with that, Jotaro unleashed a barrage of ORAs at your filthy ex, rendering him barely able to walk as he got away by his 2 minions. “Well, that was surely satisfying to watch.” you chuckled slightly, before returning to your spot at the base of the tree. “Thank you for that. It was a pretty fine revenge, to be fair.” you smirked softly, taking out your notebooks from your bag. “Yare Yare Daze...Only cowards these days.” he shook his head before smiling, seeing you with his hat back on your head. “I can’t deny that. But doesn’t matter, you’re the best anyway. There’s nobody who can replace you in my heart.” you put your hands on his face before stealing a quick kiss from him. “Come on now, dolphin boy, let’s see what you want to revise for the Entrance exam.” you grinned, lifting up the hat so you could see a bit. “That’s my girl.” the ghost of a smile plastered on his face, as he put his arm around you, leaning back the tree and having you leaning on his chest, relaxing with the notebooks in your lap.

[pettyprocrastination]

An Ode to Black Lipstick Spencer Reid x Goth!POC!Reader

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary: Spencer assigns certain memories and people to certain lipstick colors. Black will always have a special place in his heart. (Also known as Spencer Reid is a sub and love his goth gf very much.) Also Black Goth girls own my heart and my ass and that’s on God. 

Spencer never liked lipstick much. 

Then again, he never had experienced it. 

Maeve never wore lipstick. She preferred chap-stick. Simple but reliable, coconut flavored. A sensation he never got the chance to experience. Lilya used lip-gloss. Shiny, captivating, but waxy and slick like an adhesive. Luring you in until you learn the feeling you were longing for was uncomfortable. Pretty to look at and admire, but not one he wanted for himself. 

He didn’t enjoy pink lipstick, it reminded him of the girls he went to school with. Pretty pink lips curled into condescending smiles as they pretended to be his friend. Those bubblegum grins would turn into mouths open wide with laughter when the jokes would turn cruel and physical on him. His face flushed with shame, as pink as their rose smiles. 

Red made him anxious. 

It reminded him of the crimson blood spilled across the victims. Women who’s ruby red lips had giggled at the smooth words spoken to them in the darkened corner of a club by a man they didn’t know. Those red lips opening wide to scream for help before a hand is clamped over their mouth, smearing the lipstick she had applied so delicately earlier that day in hopes of attracting someone. 

Red lipstick not only reminded him of the victims but also of those who caused their pain. Women whose lips are painted a deep crimson as a lure, a hook so confidently thrown into the water that draws in so many fish. Those lips curl into a sultry smile. As they lead their prey to their home with promises whispered in a breathy moan. That coy crimson quirk of her lips would grow into a sick grin when she saw the red drain from her victim like a trickling river. A sadistic brick red, a reminder of those he couldn’t save and those he couldn’t watch. 

A mouth frozen open in a plea for help.

Lips curled into a twisted grin.

It reminded him of Lindsey Vaugn. Of Cat Adams. 

Chap-stick made him miss one he never got. 

Lip-gloss reminded him of what he thought he wanted, but lost interest in.

Red reminded him of what he could never stop. But black?

Black reminded him of what he worked to protect. 

“Paging Doctor Reid?”

Bare lips and eyes shining with amusement. “You alright there babe?”

He was caught staring, face flushed pink just like in high school. Except this time, there was no fear of bullying or insults thrown at the genius. Just a quick kiss to his face. 

“Just enjoying the view is all.” A response like that would've gotten him laughed right out of school. But your smile just got brighter. 

You turn your back on him to face the mirror, grabbing the raven tube off your nightstand, unscrewing it and dipping it in twice before pulling the wand out. 

An artist dipping their brush into the paint, ready to begin. 

Your lips are parted, eyes focused and brows furrowed as you bring your tool-your brush you use like a master to its canvas-

Your eyes flick from your reflection in the mirror to Reid’s once more.

Caught again. 

“Quick staring you goof! You’re gonna make me mess up my lipstick.”

The thought of you, lipstick smeared, appearance disheveled because of him made his heart skip a beat. His arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you into his chest where you fit snug like a puzzle piece.

Spencer smiled at you. “Well, You don’t have to worry about that-” 

He wrapped his arms around you, setting his head on the crook of your shoulder as you brought the onyx wand to your lips. 

“-Because even if it’s smudged, you look beautiful.”

In smooth movements, the lips he loved so much were painted in what is now his favorite color. Black.

Like the ink on the pages of his favorite books. 

Like the jacket you left at his house the first time you came over that smelled like your perfume. 

Like the blanket you wrapped him up in when he got the flu and you took care of him for an entire week. 

Like the nails that would gently scratch his scalp, twirling his curls as he slowly drifted off to sleep with his head in your lap. 

Like the boots you wore with such authority, confidence in each step you took. 

I’m dark. I’m powerful. I’m beautiful. 

And he agreed with every single one. 

You popped your lips, smiling with satisfaction before you looked to the alarm clock at your side. Red letters glaring at you both. 7:30 am. “We both have to go.”

Spencer nodded. “That we do.” He made no movement to remove himself from his place wrapped around you.

“Speeeence?”

He hummed, nuzzling your neck.

“Ya gotta let go babyboy.”

“Do I though?”

You laughed and wriggled out of his arms, dancing just out of his reach. “As much as we both want to stay, we can't.” Spencer huffed and threw himself out of the bed. Sending you a particularly pouty stare.

“Oh don’t you give me that look!” He looked at you again, before turning dramatically to the door and sighing like a woman in a soap opera. “We both need to get to work and you know it.”

He knows. Another day of staring into the lifeless eyes of somebody he couldn’t save in hopes to find the one he can. Fighting the darkest minds in the world so he can protect the innocent. The families who have weekend barbeques and pool parties, the men going to crowded clubs in hopes of finding love,

The woman with jade lips, waiting for him back at his apartment so they could have a movie night together. 

Spencer was pulled out of his trance, the long-winded mental spiral of his devotion to the color when a finger flicked his nose. 

“What is with you today?” You stared up at him, head tilted to the side with a look akin to a confused puppy. “You've been spacing off an awful lot.”

“I’m okay.” He reached for his bag off the coat hanger as you both went to the door. “Just thinking.”

“About?”

And there it was. The shy little smile, the slight quirk of your lips and shine in your eyes that had his knees feel wobbly and palms sweaty. Three months and the feeling still hasn’t stopped, he didn’t think it ever would. 

“You.”

Onyx lips pulled into a smile as you playfully slapped his shoulder. “Oh shut it, Romeo. You have to get to work.”

Spencer turned, opening the door and stepping outside into the hallway of his apartment complex when-

“Oh wait!”

A tug on his pant loop, causing him to jerk and spin around to face you, holding him by his trousers with a Cheshire grin. You reached up, fingers gently grabbing the collar of his shirt and tugging it down. 

“I almost forgot.” Your whisper fanned out against his neck. He stood stock-still, like prey frozen in terror. But if you were his predator, he would gladly be your meal. The sound he made-he didn’t know what exactly to call it. A choked moan, a muffled gasp, or a mix of the two he wasn’t sure. 

All he knew is when you pressed those lips to his pulse point, leaving behind a clear midnight mark on his skin; was that he wanted you to pull that sound out of him again and again and again. 

You let go of his collar, fixing it back into place with an impish grin. “So you have something to remember me by.”

He didn’t think he could forget you even if he tried. Even if he was doused with Scratch’s gas for hours on end he wouldn’t forget. Because the moment his eyes would meet that dark shade, that void of other colors. His heart would skip a beat and he’d remember. 

The woman who made him love that color so.

Authors note: Rewatching criminal minds and hnnnnn I love Spencer Reid so much that white boy has a special place in my heart. Might make this into a lil series idk. But if you want me to let me know!! Love hearing from yall :’). Gonna get back into writing for my king and husband Reaper but also some criminal minds stuff because quarantine is having me revisit all my comfort shows+movies for some sort of stability in my life lmao. Only a few more weeks and this semester will be done!!

[cottoncandyjester]

So, I’m on my main blog and not my oc blog but I was thinking about how some of our oc’s might get along since I’ve been loving the interaction between yours and some of your followers! (They’ve been so fun omg I always can’t wait to see what will happen next 🥺) but I thought about my one OC named Gabrielle being arranged into a marriage with Theo because of their similar religious beliefs and the thing about Gabrielle is she was raised that women were sweet, small, and submissive little things so she plays her part well but if any part of Theo’s scripture goes against her own she has a sadistic temper that truly embodies “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” and I can just totally see them being a whole chaotic storm of back and forths of one day they’re the perfect Christian couple household image and the next their toxic as fuck like actually beating the fuck out of each other…

Like Gabrielle will let Theo do whatever he wants to her at first, and for quite a while, patience is a virtue after all, my dear~ but eventually the camel’s back will break and Theo will wake up tied to his bed with the ropes he used on her, the drugs he used on her in his own system, and everything he used on her splayed about as she lays curled up next to him with the sweetest smile that literally spelled evil, blinking up at him with sweet blue doe eyes and cooing at him “I love you sweetie, you know this hurts me more than it hurts you, right?” And just telling him how much she loves him with the sweetest smiles and most chaste kisses as she goes thricefold on him versus what he did to her…and it’s okay that when she eventually unties the ropes he goes and punishes her. She got her release and she’ll take any punishment she deserves, she’ll take it with the same sweet smile on her cherry red lips and she’ll catalogue what he’s doing because she’ll just wait and so it thrice fold again.

Also maybe I have an idea of my big titty goth gf Rosie totally getting all heart eyes for Zeke and then totally having to go home and swoon over him to her smol butch gf before they decide to maybe try wining and dining the man into a throuple? Maybe? (Because what spells healthy relationships better than a 3 yandere throuple?!) but I don’t wanna make it too long so I’ll just stop here 🥺

👀 ohhh I have so many ideas

First off theo and Gabrielle would probably seem like such a power couple on the outside. Theo would act so polite and sweet in public simply smiling even when she does something that annoys him. The moment they are behind closed doors though he punishes her, could be sexual punishments or locking her up

Once done he’ll smile and reward her with kisses and praise for being such a good wife and taking her punishment. When it gets turned on him though he definitely has mixed feelings. Theo is a sado masochist so a part of him gets a shudder of bliss and excitement at the punishments especially sexual ones.

He’ll happily forgive her afterwards before punishing her for disobedient but that deep deep part of him wants more of her sadistic side so sometimes he would do things he knows will tick her off…he’ll ask god for forgiveness afterwards.

Okay but real talk zeke would try to act all cool but he’ll simp so hard for those two. Not only are goths/ alt his weakness but two people he can pour his affection on constantly?! Sign him UP! He’ll want to take them to his favorite jazz clubs or coffee shops just seeming hella wholesome but then his yandere side peeks out

Like how his poetry book is scrabbled with their names or how he is eager for the three of them to live together within a week of dating. Once living together there are more and more different kind of locks on the door and it goes to a point where the door has like 10 different locks on it.

God I love interacting with other peeps ocs ✨❤️

[nataliedanovelist]

C-137 Vs. 46'\

C-137 Vs. 46'\ = A Gravity Falls & Rick and Morty crossover fic for @stephreynaart! I meant to finish this, like, forever ago, but I did my best and decided this has stayed hidden in my files long enough. I hope y’all enjoy it!

Stanchez for life!!!

~~~~~~~~~~

Episode Placement: GF = after the finale (season 3) R&M = Between S1E10 and E11 (In S2E2, Rick dates 1/12/2015 on the drop-off papers for Jerry. Though Alex hates dating cartoons, it can be estimated that GF took place during 2013 thanks to Sev'ral Timez, so the next summer would be 2014. So… yeah. I put way too much thought into this.)

The vast galaxy in front of them was an endless sea of stars and space-clouds of many different colors. Some were green, some were blue, some were magenta, it honestly looked like a generic Hot Topic galaxy t-shirt.

But Rick didn’t give a shit about some fucking space-clouds or some fucking shop for teenagers who were trying too hard to be goth. Rick didn’t give a shit about the fact that Morty barely knew how to drive the fucking spaceship. Rick only have a shit about getting away from the other fucking spaceships that were after the humans, but he couldn’t drive because Rick had to repair the fucking weapon to kill those fucking bastards. Fuck.

“Aw, geez, Rick, hurry it up!” Morty yelled.

“Don’t tell me how to do my job, Morty!” Rick snapped back as he tinkered with the huge ray-gun that laid by his feet.

The spacecraft jolted to the side as a beam just barely missed it. Rick caught his screwdriver as it flew in the air for a second and he finished the final turn. Rick grinned maliciously and aimed the newest invention out at the enemy. He pulled the trigger and rather than a beam of light or a bullet escaping the gun, it appeared that nothing happened, until each spaceship seemed to be covered with blood and guts from the inside, covering the windows and halting the enemies’ spaceships.

“Oh my God, Rick, what the hell?!” Morty screamed.

“Relax, Morty, you’ve seen worse. It’s just a gun that released microscopic ninjas that slice people up from the inside until they’re nothing b-b-but guts.” Rick burped through the alcohol and leaned on the big gun proudly with a monotone voice and facial expression.

“No, Rick, what the hell IS THAT?!”

Rick looked ahead to see a wormhole of pink, blues, and whites glowing brightly in front of them. Morty was trying to turn the spaceship away, but they were being pulled in by gravity.

“Well, fuck.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Mabel was bouncing like she had springs on the bottoms of her shoes as she held her Grunkle Ford’s hand. They were both wearing ponchos and on their way to the magical part of the forest. Mabel, Dipper, Stan, and Ford had only been back in Gravity Falls for two days and Ford wanted to start off this summer right by bonding with his favorite grandniece in the Multiverse.

Ford felt guilty of the little time they had spent together the previous summer. True, he had arrived home a little late in the season, but he had spent plenty of time bonding with Dipper, leaving not nearly enough for Mabel. Ford loved her very much, but with Dipper things were more predictable. The boy was a lot like him, so Ford knew what to expect and how to bond with him, like playing Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons or working or investigating an anomaly together. Ford had no clue what twelve… thirteen-year-old girls liked and Mabel’s overwhelming flood of love and affection had startled Ford like an old alley-cat.

Still, he admired her positivity and loved to do arts-and-crafts with her. They had captured time last summer for her to make a beautiful hand-turkey on Ford’s six-fingered hand; she had said that the extra feather made it special. The old scientist had no idea what he had done to deserve Mabel… no, he didn’t deserve Mabel, but she seemed to like him, so he owed her some alone-time. Mabel seemed to like the supernatural almost as much as Dipper (Dipper took a more serious approach to it while Mabel seemed to accept everything with loving arms), so Ford offered to take her out to the magical part of the forest over breakfast and Mabel nearly choked on her Stan-cake out of pure joy.

Now, as the morning sun rose and was nearly above their heads, after about an hour of traveling and quietly talking, they were starting to reach the magical part of the forest.

“So, why do we need ponchos, Grunkle Ford?” Mabel asked as she used her free-hand to play with the yellow hood that was over her beautiful brown hair.

“Because the fairies we’re going to investigate are… rather messy.” Ford landed on. The Barf Fairies used to turn his stomach, but after traveling through dimensions for over thirty years, Ford’s stomach had hardened and since Mabel also seemed to have a strong gag-reflex, he decided that he would try to learn more about the less-than-pleasant type of fairies. “I would hate for them to ruin a Mabel Pines original.” Ford added with a smile down at the young teenager.

Mabel grinned braces-free (she had them removed back in February) up at the old scientist, loving it when he called one of her sweaters a Mabel Pines original, and her eyes twinkled when she saw the blue sweater through Ford’s poncho, the one she had made for him with a golden six-fingered hand on the front, like his old journals. “So, these are…”

“Barf Fairies.”

“Right. What do you already know about them?”

“Only that we should avoid whatever they eat.”

Mabel laughed along with him and said, “Okay. Well… I’ve actually never talked to or met a fairy before, so looks like we’re both starting from square-one. Did you meet any fairies out in the Multiverse?”

“Yes, but they were very different than the one here in Gravity Falls. I once landed in a dimension where the seasons changing was caused by the fairies, and in another dimension I met a giant fairy-queen that looked more like a slug with wings covered in glitter.”

Mabel opened her mouth to contribute to the conversation, but they both heard a noise and stopped walking in the woods. The sound had made them think of clanking metal and yells. They looked up and around at the trees, but a little puff of smoke confirmed that they had heard some sort of machine.

“What was that?” Mabel asked quietly.

“I’m not sure.” Ford said honestly and started to walk them to a clearing.

The two Pines left the cluster of pinetrees so they could look around the skies more clearly. It was a beautiful cloudless early-summer day. As they looked up at the heavens above, a flying-disk of a spaceship was whizzing over their heads, having trouble staying up in the air. Ford held Mabel close in fear of it crashing down near them, but the spaceship staggered over the woods and crashed landed from a safe distance.

“Aliens!” Mabel gasped. “Dipper told me about the one under the town! Do you think this is like that one?”

Ford, whose mind was racing, shook his head to try to think straight, and he said, “No, I… I think I know what it is, but… Mabel, I’m afraid the Barf Fairies are going to have to wait.”

Mabel peeled off her poncho and shook her hair free, revealing her purple sweater with a heart and sunglasses on it that matched her red skirt and headband. Ford also took off his poncho, pocketed both of the big yellow articles of clothing in his trenchcoat, but then pulled out his gun. He opened his mouth to tell Mabel to stay close, but she already pulled out her grappling hook and was standing behind Ford, waiting for him to lead the way.

Ford crept back into the woods with Mabel behind him. He had a good idea of what had crashed into Gravity Falls, but he had hoped that he was wrong. He didn’t want Mabel to meet him. Ford was hoping he would never show up in this dimension, but if he was still traveling around the Multiverse…

A low hissing noise from a busted engine told Ford and Mabel where to go. They only had to walk a minute before the spaceship came into view, landing in between two trees and leaving a trail of up-turned dirt in its path before coming to a halt. Ford and Mabel slowly moved towards the ship with their weapons in hand, but they found it unnecessary as a boy stumbled out and coughed into a fist, on his hands and knees and ruffled from the crash.

“Oh geez, oh man, we’re dead. We’re dead. We survived, but we’re dead.” The boy moaned as he slowly stood up. He looked about Mabel’s age, had short brown hair, and wore jeans and a yellow t-shirt with white sneakers.

Mabel pocketed her grappling hook while Ford let his arms fall to his side, but he kept the weapon in hand, just in case. “Huh. That was… not what I was expecting.” Ford said, more to himself than to Mabel.

Mabel stepped forward with her hands up kindly and she cleared her throat, gaining the boy’s attention. He blinked at the two humans and Mabel said in a soft voice, “Uh, hi, I’m Mabel. Are you hurt?”

“What?” The boy asked. He seemed jittery from the crash, his eyes darting and his forehead glistening with sweat. “Uh, n-no. No, I’m fine. I’m…”

“MORTY!”

The boy groaned and squeezed his eyes shut as he tilted his head upward. “Yup, that’s my name. Morty.”

An older man in a white lab-coat with blue-white hair stumbled out of the spaceship, and not out of drunkenness for a change. “Morty, you little…”

“Sanchez.” Ford growled and covered Mable’s ears. He knew this guy had a foul tongue, and while Ford and his brother might have sailors’ mouths, at least he and Stan knew to censor themselves around the kids. Ford’s old friend didn’t.

The old man in the lab-coat looked at Ford and his eyes widened in shock before he grinned. “Oh, no way! Good to see you again, Fordsie!” He laughed, amused by the scenario in front of him. “Great, another genius. Mind giving me a hand with this piece of… erm, crap?”

Ford groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine, the sooner I can get you out of my home dimension, the better.”

The man Grunkle Ford had called Sanchez appeared shocked again and he dug around his coat. “Wait, wait, wait. Your home dimension?” Sanchez pulled out a white flat gun with a green bulb on top and he seemed to be reading off a tiny screen. “Huh. Dimension 46’\. This one’s way out of the loop. There’s no way I could’ve gotten you home with this thing. How did you manage to pull that off?”

“Long story.” Ford said and pocketed his hand in his trenchcoat.

“Grunkle Ford,” Mabel piped and smiled up at the visitor. “Who’s this?”

Ford looked down at his niece and decided to share this piece of his thirty-year-long journey in the Multiverse with her. “Sweetie, this is my old acquaintance, Rick Sanchez. Rick, this is my great-niece, my brother Sherman’s granddaughter, Mabel.”

“Oh, hey, nice to meet you, little lady.” Rick said with a small smile and then jabbed a thumb back at Morty. “That little screw-up is my grandson, Morty.”

“Oh, yeah, like you could do any better, Rick.” Morty huffed with crossed-arms over his thin chest.

“I could do better, Morty,” Rick said and rounded on his grandson. “You know what else I can do? I can also leave you behind on Asteroid 3924987, but I won’t. I can also feed you to a five-headed mega-bird from Bird-Person’s homeworld, but I won’t. I can also send you to the citadel and trade you in for a new Morty, but I won’t, as long as you quit being a pain in the ass.”

“Rick, please!” Ford hissed.

“It’s okay, Grunkle Ford, I heard worse when I went to get a snack and Stan was watching football.” Mabel giggled, remembering the other night when Stan’s team was losing and he let out a long stream of colorful swears that made him turn red when he realized Mabel had heard him.

“Of course you have.” Ford groaned and shook his head. “Well, let’s see what the damage is, Sanchez. What caused the crash? Did your micro-verse battery finally start a rebellion?”

“No, because they know if they do, I’ll get a new battery, Genius. When we came to this dimension through a wormhole we hit a mountain side and a part broke off here…”

The two old men examined the spacecraft and were discussing ways to fix it, meanwhile Morty walked up to Mabel and rubbed an arm nervously. “So, uh… I guess they met out in the Multiverse, huh?”

Mabel nodded; she didn’t know how these two old men knew each other or why these two humans were in a spaceship, but based on context clues, Morty’s guess made the most sense. “Wait, so you two are from another dimension?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Morty said with a shrug. “This is 46'\, right? My dimension is C-137.”

“Wow, cool!” Mabel said with shining eyes that threw Morty for a loop. “So, what’s different over there? Was Benjamin Franklin a man and never accomplished anything? Are dinosaurs still alive? Oo! I bet your sky is lavender-purple all the time, right?!”

Morty laughed a little and rubbed his arm again. “Uh, no. It’s, I think, pretty much the same as yours. My Grandpa Rick says there’s an infinite number of realities that are just slightly different from one another. M-M-Maybe the difference between C-137 and 46'\ is so small and unimportant it’s not obvious.”

“Oh, okay,” Mabel peered over to watch Rick and Ford work together for a little bit and then she smiled back at Morty. “So, do you always go on adventures with your Grandpa Rick?”

Morty sighed in a shaky puberty-voice and nodded. “Yeah, he’s always making me go on these stupid adventures with him.”

“What?” Mabel gasped with a smile. “They’re not stupid! I’d love to go to a different dimension with my Grunkle Ford! I’ve already been on one with him and Grunkle Stan when they had to rescue me from Dimension Mab3L. The other mes were a little self-centered, but it was a lot of fun to punch myself in the face and rescue my great-uncles.”

“Yeah, but from the sounds of it, your - what did you say, Grunkle Ford? - is nice to you.” Morty pointed out. “My Grandpa Rick treats me like garbage all the time, but then again he treats everyone like garbage, so at least he’s only signaling me out to stay hidden from the Federation or whatever.”

“Oh.” Mabel said quietly and held her hands behind her back bashfully, unsure of how to respond, but she decided to try to make Morty feel better. “Well, my other great-uncle, Grunkle Stan, is a little tough sometimes, but that’s only because he cares about his family and is toughening us up for a tougher world. He’s my hero!”

“That sounds nice.” Morty said with a small smile. He didn’t think Rick cared about his family like this Stan guy, but Morty wasn’t in the mood to kill Mabel’s optimism. “I like your sweater, by the way.”

“Thanks!” Mabel grinned proudly. “I made it!”

Morty’s eyes widened. “Wow, really?” Mabel held out her arm so Morty could feel her sleeve. “Oh my God, that’s amazing! You’re really talented.”

“Hey, thanks! If you want, I can make you one!”

“R-R-Really? You’d do that for me?”

“Sure! What’s your favorite color?”

“Uh… y-yellow.”

“Got it!”

Ford and Rick walked up to the teenagers and the six-fingered researcher said, “Well, I’m afraid the ship lost a part we need, but luckily I have the materials we need to build one in the lab back home.”

“Great!” Mabel said and grinned. “Let’s go! So, how did you two meet, anyway?”

Ford and Mabel led the way with Rick and Morty closely behind. “We met about twenty years ago in a high-security prison. I remember feeling relieved to see another human. I had been without human contact for a little under two years at the time since I had been stranded on some desert planet.”

“Yeah, this nerd got into big trouble for the extinction of a few million species on Planet 8824816.”

“What?!” Mabel gasped and looked up at her great-uncle, unable to believe that he would cause such mass genocide. “Grunkle Ford, you didn’t?!”

“Of course I didn’t, Mabel.” Ford quickly reassured his niece. “That was the planet I thought was a sandwich. Anyway, at least I didn’t do what Rick was in for…”

“What did he do?”

“I purposely caused mass genocide on Sector 56, Dimension “”113.” Rick said in a scaringly monotone voice.

“What?!”

“Rick!” Ford and Morty both scolded at the same time.

“Hey, it was either me or the Valakawns!” Rick snapped back. “Those bloodsucking leeches didn’t see what hit them, until the Federation caught me hanging from a tree upside-down, passed out and drunk.”

“Alright, enough!” Ford said firmly. “Let’s just build the part we need so we can get you two back to your home dimension. And, Mabel, once they’re gone we’re going to patch the wormhole with alien adhesive.”

“Okay. Last thing we want is for Dipper to get stuck in Dimension Dipp-3R or something.”

“Who’s Dipper?” Morty asked quietly.

“My twin brother!”

“Oh, cool! I don’t have a twin, but I have met multiple versions of myself.”

“Hey, me too! I’ve met Table-Mabel, Explainble, Threebel, Military-Expert-Mabel, Brainbel, T-Rex-Mabel, Fire-Mabel, and even Anti-Mabel!”

“I’ve met an Evil-Morty with one eye-patch who worked for the worst Rick in the Multiverse. I’ve also… Well, let’s just say I’ve met a lot of mes.”

The two teenagers talked while the two old men chatted on ways to fix the ship as they got closer to the Mystery Shack. Rick looked up and down the place and then snorted, amused. “Huh. Not the kind of place I’d expect from Mr. Stick-In-The-Mud over here.”

“My brother had to make some… changes in order to pay off the mortgage.” Ford explained and led the way to the back door. He opened it and said, “My lab is downstairs behind the vending machine in the gift shop. I believe Soos is giving a tour, so it should be safe to enter.”

“Gift shop?” Rick laughed and poked Ford’s shoulder. “When did you get so soft?”

“I am not< soft.” Ford said dignified.

“You’re wearing a blue sweater with a gold six-fingered hand.”

“My niece made it for me!” Ford said proudly and puffed out his chest.

Mabel rolled her eyes with blushing chubby cheeks and a smile and decided to let the old guys fight. She took Morty’s hand and said, “Come on! I’ll show you my room! I have a huge sticker collection you’ll love!”

“Oh, okay!” Morty said and allowed her to drag her up to the attic; it was nice being dragged to something nice and safe rather than some new monster of a different dimension.

“But hey, you turned your lab into a gift shop.” Rick was saying while the teenagers did their own thing. “Least you’re making a profit.” Ford wasn’t sure if Rick was being sincere or not.

“Actually, it’s all my brother’s.” Ford said and waved the subject away. “We’re getting off track. Let's just get you and your grandson out of my dimension.”

“Geez, you used to be way more fun.” Rick said with sagged shoulders. “What happened to the guy who ranked up million on Lottocron Nine and got tattoos with octopus-armed piglets? What happened to the interdimensional criminal who once shot fifty Bureaucrats to save a fellow scientist’s ass?”

“He discovered what was most important, Sanchez.” Ford growled with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Oh, HO!” A voice laughed as he shook his head and left the kitchen. “I know this guy isn’t talking about Mr. Goody-Nerds-Shoes!”

Ford pinched the bridge of his nose. The last thing he wanted was for his twin and his old friend to meet, but it seemed like some greater being(s) really wanted this to happen, so here we go.

Rick grinned at the sight of a conman in his suit and fez, with a can in his hand, instantly giving Rick the vibe that this guy couldn’t be trusted but would be a hit at parties and wasn’t a total snitch. “Now THIS is what I’m talking about! Name’s Rick, Ford Two.”

Stan barked a laugh and shook his hand. “The name’s Stan, Genius. And please for the love of Moses you weren’t just talking about my brother?”

“Are you kidding, this guy was a total badass!” Rick jabbed a thumb back at the fuming scientist. “He was a total idiot, had no clue how the Multiverse worked, but he was always willing to barrel into whatever crap was out there and destroy some shit!”

“Okay, you and I need to talk.” Stan tossed him the can of soda and went into the kitchen to get some snacks. “I wanna hear more about what kind of crazy violent nomad Ford was back in the day!”

“You got it! Just tell me how the hell he ended up with a cool twin? What, did you inherit all the fun traits leaving him with hobbies like collecting alien stamps?”

Stan barked a laugh and was back, looping an arm around his skinny neck. “I love this guy! Now, please tell me you were there when he got his stupid tattoo.”

“Stanley,” Ford scolded. “We’re supposed to be working on building the part he needs so he can go home. Rick and his grandson are stranded here…”

“Please, I can make that piece of shit from scratch in my sleep.” Rick said. “And Morty’s fine. That niece of yours will keep his small brain entertained for hours.” He turned to Stan and asked, “You got any booze, we had a rough crash here and I need a drink.”

“I got a secret stash in my room,” Stan muttered. “I don’t like drinking with the kids here, but I guess you can have a shot of whisky to relax. Want some soda?”

“Sure, why not. There’s a bit in my flask to last.”

And the old men walked away for the ‘Employees Only’ part of the house, leaving Ford to grit his teeth in annoyance and then bite his lip in discomfort. This could only end one way and he was not looking forward to it.

To be continued...