bitemedotmp3

[bitemedotmp3]

"This is great, both of my worst enemies left the city, and I didn't even have to do anything!"

"Wish there wasn't some stupid pseudo-zombie apocalypse going on so I could, like, actually enjoy it..."

[bitemedotmp3]

"So no, is what I'm hearing. Really... frickin' awesome." Uzi sighs, screwing her eyes shut tight. Ugh, too tight, now her head hurts. Why are humans made like this?

If they weren't going through some kind of glitchy zombie apocalypse right now, Uzi might think this whole thing was kinda neat. They'd probably learn some kind of lame lesson at the end of it, like humans and robots aren't so different after all, or what-the-hell-ever. But now it's some stupid forced cooperation story, along with a lame bodyswap. We're just picking fic tropes out of a hat now, huh?

"I mean, pilot skills aren't worth anything if there's nothing to pilot, so unless you're hiding one of those mobile suits under a tarp nearby, gonna go with 'not helpful.'" Uzi glances over her shoulder; even her lame human senses can pick up on the moaning and groaning on the main street, and if the two girls hang around much longer they're going to be glitched chow.

There's something about the term 'mobile suit' that's familiar, something on the tip of her tongue... But that's not something to worry about when they could be eaten in the next few minutes.

Uzi shoots her ex-tail a glare, raising a hand to slap at it before remembering it's not her body anymore. "Yeah, it is alive," she sighs. "And it's a psycho, so whatever you do, don't listen to it. Anyways, unlike some people, I have cool and awesome powers, but they're the 'comes with a heavy price' type, so don't try 'em unless we're about to die. Alright? Now, let's..."

Let's what? Let's run aimlessly? Get eaten by not-zombies? Uzi sighs and scratches at her head. Real hair feels weird. "I dunno. You got any ideas?" she says, looking down at Suletta.

☆ Everything felt... weird. Everything had been normal one moment (aside from the zombies) and the next she'd become smaller? Not just smaller. Her movements felt weird. Thinking felt weird. All of the sensations that she associated with her body just weren't there. There was something beating within her chest, for example, but it didn't really feel like a heart. Her vision had... a HUD? Like a video game?

Her eyes squeaked when they moved. Actually, were they eyes? A robotic hand touched her face. It was a screen. Well, that kind of made sense. She was pretty sure she'd swapped places with the robot girl she'd just bumped into.

"E-Eh!?" The sound of her own voice speaking to her in a super casual way snapped her out of the trance she'd been in when she tried to come to terms with this new drone body. "P-Powers? I mean, I'm a Replichild I guess... I'm kind of strong? And really athletic... But what I'm really good at is piloting Mobile Suits."

The threat of the Glitched still loomed. Calibarn wasn't here, and even if it was? She wouldn't be able to pilot it. Uzi's body probably wouldn't be able to work with the Permet properly. There was something else, too. Suletta had a million questions, but something was creeping out. "Why... does your tail keep staring at me? It's not a-alive, is it?" It had a stupid face, with its tongue hanging out.

[bitemedotmp3]

Sonic's art style was a little different, now that Uzi thinks about it. Can people have different art styles, is that a thing? It might be better for her to just drop that line of thought completely.

She flinches back from the pink hedgehog's sudden burst of energy- it's really the opposite of her own vibe, and Uzi doesn't know how to handle it well. "U-uh, yeah, I know him. He was the first person I met when I came here, he kinda... helped me out, I guess? I mean, coming here was freaky, and then you meet a giant anthro animal and you don't think that'll help, but he was pretty chill."

Sonic seems like he'd be a hard guy to miss, but it's not like Uzi's hours match up with the general populace. Being allergic to direct sunlight will do that; it's a total social life killer. Yes, that's the reason she has so few friends, it's the weird hours she keeps.

Shoving her hands into her pockets, Uzi shrugs. "Sorry, been a while since I've seen him, so I dunno if he's still around. People come and go, so it's kinda hard to keep current." Kind of a lame answer, but it's all she's got. "Name's Uzi. If I see him again, I'll let you know."

❥ "Its been a while since...?" Actually, somehow she didn't think she wanted that statement clarified at that exact moment. There was probably a story there, but she didn't want to pry. She was just glad she had been forgiven for her rudeness! "Oh, well as long as its okay. I won't do it again, I promise!" Amy would never make a mistake like that twice!

She'd been a little dejected entering this conversation, but all it took was one familiar name to make the girl perk up. "Sonic!? You've met Sonic!? I've been looking all over the city for him!" That answered her question. The hedgehog was practically beaming.

"We've been friends for a long time, and he's always such a big help. He's saved our world a number of times, you know? Does that mean he's around here somewhere?" Even if she said something to the contrary, at least Amy had hope now!

[bitemedotmp3]

Chill time 💿🎶

They deserve to rest.

[bitemedotmp3]

>THOUGHT WE WERE BEING SN-OW OOF HEY

While Uzi's obviously not a fan of being trampled, she's gotta wonder if V is doing this on purpose. Maybe she has some kind of inkling as to how Uzi feels, maybe this is her stupid way of teasing her for nursing this stupid crush and acting stupid, stupid, stupid. Because there's that moment as V crawls over her, where Uzi feels the heat from her chassis and the weight of her limbs pressing down on her. Something about it makes her air venting hitch for a moment. She wants it to stop. She wants it to last for another hour.

Ugh. Let's forcibly repress all that.

"Don't need to be such a bitch about it," Uzi grumbles. She's still muttering expletives under her exhaust when the floor vanishes beneath her hands and sends her tumbling to the ground. Or into V's arms. Dammit, if only her reflexes were faster!

"Oh, no warning? Bite me," says Uzi. Frowning, she wriggles out of V's arms and onto solid ground, taking a moment to adjust her hat as she takes in their surroundings. It must be some kind of employee-only area, but muffled dialogue can be heard from somewhere beyond the walls.

"Alright, I'll admit it: this is a sweet find. Why didn't you tell me about it sooner? Planning for our Valentine's date? Wanted to impress me?" she says, nudging V's thigh. "'Cuz it's kinda working."

Here's the new tactic: by joking about it, it becomes less serious. It's just a joke! It's not a date! Uzi's not crushing! It's joke! It's working! This is working, totally! She's not blushing! She isn't embarrassed by what she said! When she turns away, it's not to hide her blushing!

"Anyways. Since you've apparently been scouting the place, I'll just follow you. Just no more dinosaur flicks this time or I'll lose my frickin' mind."

∞ "A hunter's gonna hunt, babe." V didn't hold back with her ribbing, but she waited for them to descend to the theatre roof to resume it. Typical of a predator, she saw a vulnerability in her prey and took advantage of it immediately. Uzi was acting all flustered for some reason. The fact that she couldn't figure it out was a testament to just how bad she was with things like this too, though.

Uzi had ducked in pretty quickly, leaving that conversation thread hanging as V followed in hot pursuit. Being a professional wall climber, she quickly got annoyed by how slow Uzi was being. And while she'd opted to use her visor to communicate with V? The opposite wasn't true. "Why did you go first if you didn't know where to go!?", she hissed and crawled ahead. Over Uzi's body, in fact. "This way."

It wasn't much farther to the drop out point, where V slipped down through another vent and into a dark, abandoned hallway. She held out her arms to catch Uzi when she came out after her, worried she'd hit the ground with a loud thump.

"Pretty sweet, right? We'll find the theatres when we take the next turn. Just gotta not be seen until we find a seat." Why was she acting like such a showoff tonight? Uzi knew she was hot shit, but V was trying to act like it more than normal.

[bitemedotmp3]

If you're me, then...

She's always wanted to be tall. This is a bit much, though. Way too high off the ground, and no balance-keeping subroutines to rely on. Humans do this all manually? This is awful. And then there's the... sensations. Do humans know they've always got fluids moving around and their bodies are making weird gurgling noises and there's nothing to filter every feeling bombarding her and the red is hurting her eyes and the air smells weird why does she think that what's going on?

"Ooh, this sucks. This sucks," groans Uzi. "Is this what human nausea feels like? I'm gonna be sick. I think?"

It's adjacent to drone nausea, but without the helpful pop-ups. She doesn't even have a HUD anymore, so it's just one awful thing after another. She looks over and up, then reminds herself she's tall now, and then looks down at her companion. Or, herself. Because it wasn't bad enough that Uzi became someone else, but someone else also became her.

"Hey, Suletta. Don't you have any frickin'... I dunno, any powers? Can you fly? Are you psychic? Magical? Cyborg? Literally anything?" she says, frowning. "Or is it just my luck I got stuck with a frickin' normie?"

@mercurywitch

[bitemedotmp3]

"Can't be undead if they can't die," says Uzi, peeking out the window. "More likely some kinda virus or something. Computer virus, I mean. I had a hunch this whole thing was some kinda simulation- Am I allowed to say that? Feels like a big spoiler."

Uzi doesn't love being dragged along, especially since she can just fly, but it's nice to know Mika cares enough to want to save her life. In fact, if it were up to her she'd still be out on the street, smashing stuff and indulging in all the looting and rioting fantasies she's had since she's come here. But Mika probably wouldn't approve of that, and if she got eaten by glitch zombies, Uzi would feel bad about it.

She squints at the shambling shapes on the streets. "Wait, I think... I think I know that guy. He runs a cool secondhand shop in Fibonacci, and he's definitely not dead. So that... What does that mean...?"

Her phone buzzes in her pocket, and Uzi pulls it out at the same time as Mika does. When she looks back out the window, every pair of eyes out on the street is looking right at her.

Oh, the jumpscare factor is great, but this still sucks.

"Oh shit," says Uzi, nearly tripping as she backs away. "Shit, shit, shit!" She throws her arms wide, and circular violet hologram imposes itself over the store's shelving units. Then she brings her hands together, and all of the furniture lurches forward, slamming against the door and window just as the glitched begin to throw themselves at it.

"Mika, need an exit!" she shouts, still holding the objects steady. "I can only do one thing at a time, and there's too many for me to squash! Ooh, or you can find a big buzzsaw! And I can, like, gravity gun it, heheh!"

"I think we can rest easy for a minute. It seems they are all calming down for now..."

The streets were looking just as awful as Mika was expecting. Even coming outside with Uzi and their combined strengths it didn't feel like the two of them would keep up with how many of the "Glitched" kept reappearing. So she dragged the drone off to a nearby store, taking a moment to recuperate from all the fighting they did as the student locked all the doors.

"This is the craziest thing that's happened so far. I mean these are just the undead right? But did this many people die here at some point? I thought death wasn't permanent here..."

Still like karmatic justice her phone vibrated in Mika's pockets, quickly picking up to see what message was across it's screen this time. All to see two ominous words.

"They're Looking"

"Huh? What does that mean?" The answer finally came to light when she heard loud shouting from outside, followed by the massive hoard of footsteps running towards their direction.

"...You've got to be kidding me."

@bitemedotmp3

[bitemedotmp3]

"Oh, hey Frye. Check this out!"

A brick lifts off from the ground and hurls itself through the shop window, propelled through the air by a triangular violet hologram. Uzi cackles as the glass shatters, altering some of the glitchy entities shambling around at the end of the streets. Paying them no heed, Uzi climbs in through the now-empty window frame and begins rummaging around. A few moments later, she kicks the front door open, throwing her arms wide.

"You're free now! Go and wreak havoc in this new apocalypse!" she shouts. A few quiet moments later, a swarm of small, disc-shaped... vacuums come rolling out of the building. A quiet whirring can be heard from each of them as they make their way down the sidewalks towards robo-god knows where.

"See? Figured this would be the perfect chance to rescue my imprisoned AI brethren," says Uzi, still grinning. "And yeah, I know they're not, like conscious AI, but still! Principle of the thing, right?"

The distorted voices from down the street grow louder, and Uzi glances over her shoulder at the approaching mob. They're not fast, but... they're coming. "Walk and talk?" she says. "Away from the don't-call-them-zombies?"

@moraypower

[bitemedotmp3]

✞ lets talk about our dead moms

✞ - for my muse to talk about somebody’s death

"He was a planet."

Uzi frowns. "No he wasn't. Don't BS me."

Peter leans forward in his seat. "Yes he was! If I was gonna make something up, why would it be something so obviously fake? It sounds super fake, therefore." And now he leans back, smirking. "It's true."

"That's stupid," she says, rolling her eyes. "If your dad was a planet, how'd he help make you?"

"Well, y'see, he was a living planet, and he made, a... a guy. And he sent that guy all over the galaxy to have kids with as many people as he could, because he was trying to have a kid that inherited his Celestial genes. And that kid-"

"Was you, right? Dude, c'mon, you're bad at this," says Uzi. She slouches back in her chair, wishing she'd just spent the night working on her Minecraft server like she originally planned.

Peter tries to wave her away, but he keeps coming back. Desperate, thinks Uzi. "What, you think I'm tryin' to impress you or something? You're a stupid teenager, if I was gonna lie to you, it would be about something way cooler, not that my dad was a planet and I killed him!"

That would be a weird thing to lie about.

"You killed him?" says Uzi, the edge gone from her voice.

"Oh, so now you're curious? Yeah, I killed him! Well, me and my team. Guardians of the Galaxy. No big deal. Barely knew him, so it was like. Totally fine." The man falls back, lapsing into silence. "Didn't bother me at all."

She sighs. "My dad's just a normal guy. Khan Doorman, leader of the Worker Defense Force. But when it came time to actually defend, he just locked me in a room with a murder drone. So, yeah. Daddy issues."

"'Least he's still alive."

"I guess. He's been trying to be better, but it's kinda like... Not really something that's easy to fix."

A rare moment of silence descends on the pair, both stewing in their parental trauma. Peter, forced to kill his omnicidal father, and Uzi, forced to to reckon with the fact that her father is just a regular person. Great conversation topic.

"Wait, hold on," says Peter, sitting up again. "Your last name is Doorman?"

Uzi waves her hand, and a crumped-up napkin flies at his head as she grumbles. "Why the hell does everyone fixate on that? Whatever, what about your mom?"

Peter's laugh trails off, and he clicks his tongue. "She died when I was just a kid. Brain cancer."

"I dunno what that is."

"Some disease, really hard to get rid of. But here's the kicker, turns out dad put it in her, to make it easier for himself to leave or what-the-fuck-ever. Was a lot easier to kill him after that." Peter runs his hand over his face, sighing. "Can we talk about something that doesn't suck?"

"My mom died when I was just an untrained- just a baby," says Uzi. Her mind wanders a bit, back to photos in her dad's office of quote-unquote happier times. "I didn't even remember what she looked like."

"I said something that doesn't suck, dead moms is-" He slumps into his seat with another sigh. "Didn't know robots even had parents. Wait, so do they, like-"

"They input code into an untrained neural network. Not whatever gross stuff you were thinking of," she says, shooting him a glower. "Anyways, found out, like, a few days before I got here that she wasn't actually dead. She was running around as a little fleshy core unit- well, not running around, she was in hiding. Kind of? I dunno, I haven't really been able to talk to her about it. Finding out she was alive was just..."

It was cool to know her mom wasn't dead. It was less cool to learn that she just... didn't come home, for some reason. Not that she couldn't, just that she didn't. She probably had 'good reasons,' like adults always do for the stupid stuff they do, but that doesn't make Uzi feel any better.

She shakes her head. "We didn't really have a chance to get to know each other or anything yet. Hopefully whenever I get back home. If I get back home."

Another silence descends. Peter is the first to break it after a few minutes, holding his fist in the air. "Parent stuff. It sucks, huh?"

"Sure does. But hey, even with all that baggage, you still became a- what did you say? -Guardian of the Globe, or whatever?" says Uzi.

"Galaxy," says Peter. "And you're still a reasonably well-adjusted brat, so I guess everything worked out in the end."

Uzi stands up in her chair, scuffing the seat with bootprints. "Bite me! This 'brat' saved the whole universe!"

Peter rises to match her glare. "Oh yeah? So did I! Like, four times, and I'm pretty sure four is bigger than one."

"They teach you that on Earth school?"

"Joke's on you! I never went to school."

"Explains a lot!"

"Okay, I take back all kind-of-nice stuff I said about you, you're just a regular brat."

"And you're a huge brat!" Uzi pounces on Peter, clinging onto him and sinking her teeth into his shoulder.

"Ow, what the hell is wrong with you?!" says Peter, grabbing at her. "This is real leather, do you know how hard that is to get out in space?"

"Bite me! And your music taste sucks!"

"God, this is why I don't deal with kids!"

[bitemedotmp3]

"You better frickin' not! Even if those are all mainstream bands, you- Hold on, what the fuck is that?"

There's some... thing shambling around at the end of the street. Uzi points at it, eyes wide. "Do you see that? What the fuck? Shit, is something happening? I gotta go, dude. Important things to do."

She unfurls a pair of leathery wings and takes off into the sky. "Try not to die, loser!"

Sephiroth looked beyond shocked at being called a loser. He glared at her, pupils contracting into pins as he bristled at her. Who did she think she was calling him a loser? It totally didn't hurt his feelings! he just thought she was wrong in her perception of him!

"N-no!" He held his journal close to his chest. "I'm not a loser! You... you dumb robot!"

Ok, not his strongest insult, but what else was he supposed to say? "In fact, I'm going to listen to all these songs! and I am going to tell people over twenty-five about them!"

[bitemedotmp3]

"NEVER BET AGAINST UZI DOORMAN BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS FRICKIN' WINNING!"

"Please put us in a horror movie, please put us in a horror movie, please put us in a horror movie...!"

[bitemedotmp3]

Oh, what? How dare this guy suddenly not want to be her friend when Uzi didn't care about it in the first place! Does he think he's better than her or something? 'Cuz he's not!

"Oh yeah? Well, I'm taking back all those music recs I gave you! I saw you write them down, tear the page out and give it to me! You don't deserve them!"

And now it's time for the coup de grace. Real teenage-bullying type shit. Let's get this guy, let's blow him up.

"You frickin' loser."

"No! I have socialized before!" He gave her a defensive look and bit the inside of his cheek in annoyance. It wasn't his fault that he had only talked to one teenage in his whole life. She should be happy that he was being reasonable!

"Wha-?!" Sephiroth nearly gawked at her. Most people were practically begging to be his friend! He huffed his cheeks at her and stomped one foot. "Well... well if you feel so strongly, I will rescind my offer of friendship!"

[bitemedotmp3]

"Believe me, that's just the entry-level stuff. You like that, and maybe I'll clue you in on some really obscure bands. 'Cuz, you know, the less people who know about it, the better it is. Everyone knows that."

Uzi gives an unimpressed snort. "You'll allow me? You new to this whole socialization thing? You're worse at it than me, and I'm - I'm great, shut up! Maybe I don't even want to be your friend, you ever think of that?"

That's a lot of music Sephiroth has never heard before and he is writing them into his journal.

"I will be sure to keep that in mind. You seem to know a lot about music." And she was even dressed like someone who knew a lot about music. Sephiroth cannot let this person pass him up. "I'll allow you to be my friend."

[bitemedotmp3]

✤ - for my muse to wake yours from a nightmare

Stupid Rebecca and her stupid boyfriend what's his name she doesn't even remember most of the other people in her class just kind of blend together but she knows Rebecca because she's an especially huge bitch and what did Uzi ever do to deserve that nothing that's what but it doesn't matter anymore nothing really matters not anymore everything is too loud and too hot and the only thing that feels good even a tiny bit is that sweet oil trickling down her throat just reach her hands into the gaping hole in Rebecca's boyfriend's midsection really what is his damn name it's kind of bugging her now but whatever he's dead it doesn't really matter anymore just rip the parts out and tear and chew and swallow but this is disgusting it's fucking people she's eating people she shouldn't be doing this but it tastes so good but just thinking about it she can't keep it down and she drops to all fours and vomits up pieces of Rebecca's stupid boyfriend what is his fucking name and when Uzi looks up she can see Rebecca's lower half still lying there but the upper half is missing and the door is open and where did it go where is she she's going to tell everyone and then Uzi is fucked she's fucked everything is fucked-

[HIGH TEMP WARNING!]

"Uzi? Are you al- oh, you're really warm right now!"

[SLEEP MODE ENDING]

The sound of Mika's voice makes Uzi snap awake, and she thrusts out her hand instinctively. A purple glyph floats in the air around Mika's wrist, but with its nerfed strength, it doesn't actually do anything. The girl just yanks her arm away, frowning as she rubs at her hand, before looking down at Uzi with concern. "Are you okay? I don't think I've every actually seen you using the couch in here so I wanted to check on you, but..."

"Fine!" No, that's too loud, try again. "I'm fine. V was just being... V, so I came down here for some space. And battery's a little low, so... Yeah."

"You're both just so... yourselves sometimes," Mika sighs. "I'm surprised you haven't tried to kill each other."

"We already did that, we're past it now," says Uzi, her gaze unfocusing. She's watching the readouts in her HUD; temperature gauges, emotional matrixes, intrusive thought measurements, just all standard stuff after a nightmare. Everything is in expected measurements, and so she sits up. "A-Anyways, I'm totally fine and normal, so I'm going."

Mika raises an eyebrow. "Totally fine?"

"And normal!"

The girl sighs again, and sits down next to Uzi. "You don't have to leave, you know. If something's bothering you, you can tell me."

Uzi opens her mouth to give some pithy comment, but it shrivels and dies in the face of Mika's genuine kindness. The girl is just too damn nice, and Uzi's cool teenage angst doesn't really stand a chance. Also, like, friendship, or whatever.

"Just some... bad memories," says Uzi, her hands gripping the edge of her hoodie. "Happens when we go into a sleep cycle, it's some background process that formats memories. Discards redundant ones, compresses older ones, flags, uh... important ones."

Like memories of when she killed and ate her classmates. Yeah, they sucked and maybe kinda deserved it, but still.

Mika puts a hesitant hand on Uzi's shoulder, checking for her temperature first. "Well, I don't know what happened on your planet, but from the things you and V have said it doesn't sound like it was... very happy."

"That's one way to put it," Uzi snorts. "Yeah, no, it... it frickin' sucked. Not that being here is much better."

"Too many humans, right?"

"And don't get me started on the sun."

Uzi doesn't look over at Mika- too embarassing -but she can feel the girl's smile. She hasn't had a friend like this before, it's... it's nice.

"You don't mind if I, like... just sit here for a bit longer, do you?" says Uzi.

"Of course not. You live here too, after all. And apparently, so does V... and N?"

Uzi nods, feeling a small heat on her cheeks. "I mean, probably. Hopefully. He knows he can always come over, it's just- I-I don't wanna talk about this! Don't take advantage of my emotional vulnerability!"

"I just thought a distraction might help," says Mika, squeezing Uzi's shoulder before pulling her hand away. "But I mean, one drone was already a headache, and now we're up to three..."

"Bite me! If it wasn't for me, you'd still be living alone, probably!"

Mika huffs. "And it would be a lot quieter! But... it would also be lonely, I think. So I don't mind having you three here."

"Well, we don't mind you either. I guess. Whatever." Uzi folds her hands over her chest, sighing. "...Thanks, by the way. Don't tell anyone I said that junk."

"I wouldn't want to hurt your rep."

"Yeah, can't have anything thinking I have feelings or whatever." She gives a small smile. "Next time, you're gonna traumadump to me, okay? It's only fair, 'cuz I feel like you know way more about my baggage."

[bitemedotmp3]

"My Chemical Romance, Good Charlotte, Green Day, Linkin Park, Blink-182, Sum 41, Jimmy Eat World, The Offspring, All-American Rejects, Fall Out Boy, Bowling for Soup, Simple Plan, Panic! At the Disco, Paramore, All Time Low, Yellowcard, The Ramones, and Taking Back Sunday."

"Word of advice, don't listen to what anyone over twenty-five suggests."

"I know there are horrific monstrosities beyond my comprehension banging on the wall, but I just learned I can listen to music on my phone. Does anyone have a list for someone who wasn't allowed to listen to music with words?"

[bitemedotmp3]

GET KABEDON'D

[bitemedotmp3]

"Please put us in a horror movie, please put us in a horror movie, please put us in a horror movie...!"