#i tried to include both the friendship and the ship for you as best i could

[ylangelegy]

⋆.˚ childhood best friend ♡︎ chan.

── .✦ the one where bang chan learns what 'home' means. #우리의_찬란한_청춘_방찬에게 #BrightestStarBangChan

✰ gn!reader, idol!chan, fluff!!!, angst 🙁, childhood best friends, long distance friendship, homesickness, hurt/comfort, ambiguous romance [pining/crushes], open ending. end notes included! ❤︎ all sfw. intentional lowercase. wc: 1,800+

🧸 childhood best friend chan who moves in next door, who came from seoul to sydney and was scared he wouldn't meet anyone his age.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who is the only one to attend your birthday party. he flashes you a grin and tries to cheer you up by saying, "that just means more cake for us!"

🧸 childhood best friend chan who introduces himself as christopher— but you can call him chris, he says hastily. he knows his full name is too long. you assure him no, it's okay, you'll call him christopher. he rewards you with another one of his signature dimpled smiles. the first of many.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who spends most of his summers with you. his next door neighbor, his new best friend. he tries to teach you how to play soccer. you burn songs you think he'll like on to CDs. the two of you learn to bike down your street. see? you both still have the scars to prove it.

🧸 childhood best friend chan whose fondest memories with you are set in beaches. you're both still too young to surf, so you kill your time trying to outswim each other. it's a tender rotation of portraits— hands sticky with fruit-flavored ice cream, sand in your slippers, the smell of sunscreen.

🧸 childhood best friend chan slash guitar teacher. you spend one too many evenings out on his porch with his beat-up acoustic guitar. as his fingers gently guide yours over the strings, you consider romance. but for only a moment. because you'd rather have him like this than risk not having him at all.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who sticks to your side at school. everyone thinks you're dating; the two of you give up on correcting peers. chan doesn't quite understand why he's so happy to have people assume, and why he's even happier to have you acquiesce.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who tells you, first, about what he plans to do. "it's just an audition," he tells you, but you already know. you already know what he's destined for, who he's going to be, as early as then.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who practices his bruno mars audition song with you over and over and over again until you forget what the original version sounds like. nowadays, whenever you hear just the way you are, it's only ever in the voice of thirteen-year-old christopher.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who calls you up excitedly, who only says two words. "i'm in," he breathes, and there's so many things you can say in that moment. of course you are, and i never doubted you, and you're leaving me?, but instead you settle on, "i'm proud of you."

🧸 childhood best friend chan who doesn't cry at the family dinner. doesn't cry at the airport. he laughs when you tear up, teases that you're being silly. think of it as summer camp, he tells you, and when he hugs you goodbye, his hands shake just a teensy bit.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who cries on the plane— because at least, there, no one who loves him will see.

🧸 childhood best friend chan slash trainee who keeps in touch. he texts a lot in those first couple of years. you'd like this café. these cherry blossoms look really good. dance practice today was tiring. you learn to read between the lines; he is saying i miss you, but he cannot say the words themselves, because then it becomes real.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who never misses a birthday, whether its yours or someone in your family's. shipping fees are too stressful and so he perfects the art of long-distance gift-giving. here, an 8tracks playlist. here, a digital flipbook. here, a video of him singing your favorite song.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who gets busy, who gets frustrated, who watches dozens of trainees debut before him. you try your darnedest to sympathize but there is only so much that you can know about this industry, about his lifestyle.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who never blames you. how could he? he made his choice. but still. but still. there are days, weeks, months, where he forces himself to keep his distance. because this is a whole other kind of hurting— saying goodbye and knowing that the door is still left open a crack.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who watches your life in pictures, in the squares of instagram photos, the tagged posts on facebook. you graduate high school, and then uni. you work part-time jobs. you finally learn how to surf. and he is proud, and he is hurt, and he is yours, still, in ways that neither of you can comprehend.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who, after being distant for what feels like forever, extends an olive branch in the form of a follow request. finstas are only just becoming a thing in his part of the world. every trainee has one. the first person he thinks to follow is you.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who starts reacting to your stories, who replies every so often. your haircut looks nice and how's your mum? and wow, that part of town has changed a lot. it's all so stilted, all so polite, but he's trying, he's trying, he's trying. he needs you to see that.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who finally calls you one evening to tell you everything. you are horrified by what he's gone through, by all the times he's been passed over, but chan reassures you. even as you apologize, again and again, for not knowing.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who tells you, "i chose this. i want to keep choosing it. but—" a beat. then, softly, the words he's held himself back from saying. "i just miss you, that's all."

🧸 childhood best friend chan who slots right back in to your life. he's still plenty busy. at least now he knows that you're always just one message away, that you'll appreciate his updates of i met another aussie today or there's a new day6 song or i can finally stop dieting.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who excitedly tells you about 3racha. about his genius lyricist j.one and his killer rapper spearb. his own moniker is plain and simple, he says with a laugh. cb97. but it's him, it's his, it's a start.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who sends you the first demo of a song he's genuinely happy to have produced. my heart is in your hands, he jokes in the e-mail subject line. j.one is good. so is spearb. but chan, cb97, your christopher, who sings "i'd like to start off this speech with a 'thank you' to everyone that helped little chris to grow up"? he's everything.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who tells you in vague terms that he might not be reachable for some time. there's a lot of things he wants to tell you, wants to divulge. there are other people on the line, now, though, and so he holds back. you understand. you tell him you'll wait. he is so, so grateful.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who is introduced as the leader of JYPE's newest boy group. he is not christopher or chris. he is chan, now. bang chan. you watch the survival show with his family. you give them a handwritten letter for him, when they go to visit him in south korea. you see him become everything he said he would be.

🧸 childhood best friend chan whose hair is two-toned dirty blonde and aqua blue when he debuts with hellevator. you buy his photocard. you still have it up in your room; it makes him cringe, but he is secretly pleased that you cared enough to do such a small thing.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who bears the weight of impossible expectations. leader, producer, idol. son, brother. friend. he is so many things all at once. they say he is too much. they say he is not enough. he doesn't know who to listen to.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who blames himself for things that are beyond his control. for 2019. for 2020. for 2021. for— there isn't a year where chan isn't blaming himself for something, really.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who finds comfort in the smallest of things. a noisy dorm with seven other boys. the thrill of turning a note in to a living, breathing song. you. your little updates. you. your easy responses. you. your unwavering support. you, you, you.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who wonders often sometimes what it would have been like if he stayed.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who can see it so, so clearly. the college you would have both gone to. working at the record store; busking in the mall. summers of surf and sun. your fingers fitting in to the spaces between his.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who thinks he would have been happy with that life. happier than right now?... he's not sure. all he knows is that he would have been happy. the two of you could have been so happy.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who often sometimes feel like his youth was taken from him. his teenage years were spent as a trainee; his early twenties were spent fighting for every scrap. he doesn't regret the choices he made. he doesn't want to. he can't.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who doesn't tell you any of this. a part of him doesn't have to. you know just how much he gave up. you know just how much he gained. you know why there are certain encores that make him cry, why there are songs he can't bear to perform live. why it's always so hard for him to name 'home' nowadays—

🧸 childhood best friend chan who wants to believe that 'home' means sydney. who, to make things easier, says 'home' is seoul. who will sometimes say that 'home' is STAY, 'home' is stray kids. who knows, deep down, that home is a three-letter word of y-o-u.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who, when he makes his way back to sydney, is scared shitless. he's been gone for so long. it's an endless litany of 'what if's. what if berry doesn't recognize him anymore. what if all his favorite restaurants have shut down. what if you realize you don't like the person he's become. what if, what if.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who is only partially reassured when he realizes there's still a spot for him at the dinner table, when his old friends don't treat him any differently, when the path to the park still feels familiar.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who realizes that all of his worries are unfounded when you greet him with "long time no see, christopher." not chan. not chris. christopher.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who smiles the same way that he had when he first met you. all bright eyes and dimples.

🧸 childhood best friend chan who holds out his hand, waiting to see if you'll take it.

✰ i think a lot about a line in The Myth of Sisyphus, where it goes something along the lines of "one must imagine sisyphus happy." in some way, this is me #coping (lol). one must imagine bang chan happy. because maaan, does he deserve it. happy birthday, chris.

[urlibragirl]

summary : you and eren were childhood friends, but you guys drifted apart. One day, Eren decide to stick the pieces back.

warnings/content : mdni!, fem!reader, jealous!eren, eren is a virgin, little bit of angst, p in v intercourse, unprotected sex, oral sex(m receiving)

word count : 1271

Sighing heavily, Eren rubbed his forehead as he tried to recall the events leading up to your falling out. You guys had been inseparable during childhood, always playing together and sharing secrets. But somewhere along the line, things changed. 

He remembered the day clearly, it was after Jean had joined your group of friends. There was something different about you, you seemed happier, more confident. And yet, at the same time, she seemed distant too. Like there was part of herself that kept hidden even from him.

Grinning widely, you clapped your hands excitedly as you talked to your friends about the tv-show you watched the night before. Your laugh echoed through the hallways, drawing attention from everyone around you.

You may have been known for being somewhat wild and carefree, but there was no denying that people enjoyed being around you. Even though Eren preferred quieter gathering, he couldn’t help but admire your ability to light up any room you entered. Watching you interact with others made your heart ache just a little bit more. 

He wished things could go back to how they used to be, but he knew that ship had sailed long ago. Instead, he forced himself to focus on his studies, hoping that one day he might finally gain control over his feelings. Little did he know, your paths were destined to cross again under unexpected circumstances.

One fateful evening during winter break, Armin hosted a party at his place which included most members of their original friendship circle. Despite initially declining due to personal reasons, Eren eventually caved in under pressure from Mikasa and Jean who insisted he needed some time off studying. Reluctantly agreeing, he arrived at Armin’s house.

As the night wore on and the party reached its peak, Eren found himself drawn to you, despite the animosity that had grown between you two over the years. With a determined stride, he made his way through the crowd until he stood in front of you, his heart pounding in his chest.

"Hey," he said, trying to keep his voice casual despite the butterflies fluttering in his stomach.

You glanced at him, “Oh, hey Eren,” you answered “It’s been a long time.”

You guys stood in awkward silence for a moment, the weight of your unresolved issues hanging heavy in the air.

“Look, I didn’t mean to ignore you or act like a jerk. It’s just that seeing you with Jean made me realize how much I missed having you around. We were best friends since forever, and suddenly, you were gone. I tried to move on, but my heart wouldn’t listen. So yeah, maybe I acted immaturely sometimes, but deep down, I was hurting too.” 

Your eyes widened in surprise as you listened to Eren pouring his heart out. You hadn’t expected such honesty from him. For once, he sounded vulnerable instead of aloof. “There’s also something I need to tell you,” you began, your voice barely above a whisper. “Something I’ve been wanting to say for quite a while now…” You paused for effect, taking a deep breath before continuing.

“The truth is, I’m in love with you. From the moment we met all those years ago, I knew there was something special between us. And as time went by, that feeling only grew stronger.” you finally said.

“But what about Jean?” Eren asked with a surprised tone. “Oh, with Jean it wasn’t anything serious,” you said. “It’s going to sound horrible but both of us needed someone to forget about the friend they were in love with, me with you and him with Mikasa, but apparently it wasn’t really effective”

“So why didn’t you say something?” he asked. “Well, I could ask the same thing to you Eren?” you answered, teasing him a little bit.

“I guess I was just scared,” he admitted sheepishly. “ Afraid that maybe you really had moved on without me – I’ve missed you Y/N,” he confessed, his voice shaking. “More than you’ll ever know”.

As your faces drew closer, the world around you seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in a bubble of intense emotion. Your hearts raced in unison, beating wildly against your chests as you prepared yourselves for whatever laid ahead.  Finally, after what felt like an eternity, your lips met in a tender, passionate kiss.

It was as if all the pent-up frustration and sorrow from your tumultuous past had suddenly vanished, replaced by a powerful wave of desire and affection. Time stood still as you were both lost in the moment, savoring every second of your long-awaited reunion. 

When you guys finally pulled apart, you gazed into each other's eyes, lost in the depths of each other's souls. "I love you, Eren," you whispered, your voice shaking slightly with emotion. "And I love you too, Y/N," he replied, his voice equally strained.

As your lips parted, Eren found himself struggling to catch his breath. This was new territory for him; he had never experienced such intense passion before. He looked into your eyes, wondering if she felt the same way. 

To his relief, he saw a mix of lust and tenderness reflected back at him. Gently guiding you towards the nearby bedroom, he led you inside and closed the door behind you. The room was dimly lit, casting eerie shadows across the walls. 

Undressing each other slowly, you were revealed in the sight of each other's naked forms for the first time. Despite being a virgin, Eren couldn't hide his excitement or nervousness. You sensed his apprehension and decided to take charge. 

Kneeling down beside him, you ran your hands up his thighs, stopping just short of his erection. Looking into his eyes, you gave him a reassuring smile before taking him into your mouth. Eren let out a moan as you teased him expertly, sucking gently on his cock while running your tongue along its length. 

Overwhelmed by pleasure, he reached down to touch your hair, encouraging you to continue. As you worked him over with your skilled tongue, he couldn't help but wonder how lucky he was to have found someone like you. 

Meanwhile, you moved up to straddle Eren's lap, grinding your hips against him suggestively. You wanted this to be special for him, and you intended to make sure it was. Slowly lowering yourself onto his hardened member, you gasped as you felt him slide inside your wet folds. It was tighter than he expected, but in a good way. 

You began moving up and down, meeting his thrusts halfway as you both sought release. The sounds of skin slapping against skin filled the air, punctuated by gasps of pleasure from both parties involved. Eren grabbed hold of your hips, pulling you closer as he buried himself deeper inside your warmth with each stroke. 

Your rhythm became faster and more urgent as you neared climax. Just when it felt like neither of you could take another moment, you both cried out in ecstasy, your bodies shuddering together as you reached orgasm simultaneously.

"Oh god," Eren groaned, his voice hoarse from exertion. "That was incredible." He pulled you closer, burying his face in your neck as he savored the scent of your skin. "I don't think I've ever felt anything like that before." You smiled contentedly, tracing gentle circles on his back. "Oh don’t worry, we're just getting started." 

With renewed energy, you two began exploring each other's bodies once more, lost in the heat of the moment. Every touch sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, heightening your senses and deepening your connection. 

a/n : i wrote this at 2 a.m, so there might be grammar mistakes sorry

[hdmsbsna]

Hello, I saw your post that you uploaded about Paul's writings😭😭😭, so I wanted to ask if you could make one of Paul x actress reader, I don't know, maybe he's going to see it behind the scenes or I don't know

REQUESTED: so i kind of got carried away with this, and i actually kind of love it. i'm deciding on whether or not i should make it a series, never done one before though😭 anyways...let me know what you guys think.

pairing: paul mescal x reader (fluff)

warnings: none

description: close, but not close enough follows two popular actors, you and paul, navigating a close friendship complicated by rumors and paparazzi. after a wild night, you both deal with the fallout of being misinterpreted as a couple, despite only wanting to stay friends. you both navigate your friendship with humor, understanding, and subtle flirtations, ultimately realizing how much you mean to each other.

word count: 2.2k

title: close, but not close enough.

song: lowkey by rochelle jordan

you wake up with a throbbing headache, which reminds you of the things that occurred last night but before you have time to reminisce… you all of a sudden have the urge to vomit. you quickly run to your bathroom and puke your organs out, it feels like never-ending vomit.

you’re about three minutes into just pure retching when you feel a pair of hands on ur shoulders, you’re too out of it to care who’s touching you, you just take the support and continue with your business. eventually the person’s hands pull back your hair, and as they graze over your neck that’s when you realize whose hands those belongs to

“PAUL? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?” you yell.

“jesus fucking christ, i slept over. do you mind?” he responds back

“do i mind? this is my house.” you respond lowering your voice. “do i mind?” repeating the sentence again wondering where he found the audacity.

“listen, i’m sure you remember we were all drunk. the others were able to get dd’s but i forgot to beforehand and when i tried to call an uber they hung up on me. i slept on the couch, don’t worry.” paul said clearly, trying not to piss you off any more.

“gosh paul, you know you can’t do shit like this. what if the paparazzi catches you leaving my house? i really don’t need another rumor going around.” you say, completely calm now.

“yeah, you’re right i’m sorry but at least we’re saving gas today.” he responds back, clearly not that sorry.

“pfhaha you think we’re driving to set together? you’re out of your mind, you sir are going back to your house and getting your own car.” you say matter-of-factly.

“really? you hate me that much?”

“yes..” you say watching his expression get mad. “now go get your stuff and i’ll see you in a bit.”

“fine whatever, hope you get even sicker.” he says as he walks out of your bedroom.

“FUCK YOU!” you yell back. you hear his laughter from across the house.

“love you too!” he says as the front door opens and closes.

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you and paul are both very popular actors, you guys have worked on a project once before and both of you guys are back to do another. he was one of your best friends and you genuinely enjoyed his presence but unfortunately because of the first film you guys filmed which was a romance, so many people have ‘shipped’ you guys together including fans, directors, writers and even your mutuals. it can be so frustrating when so many people want you together. you and paul of course don’t like each other, only friend feelings there, however you obviously take on more responsibility between the two of you, making sure that what you do doesn’t give people the wrong impression. unfortunately for you, paul doesn’t care at all.

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“i’m saying that we can’t be publicly hanging out, people will get the wrong impression” you say over the phone, currently on facetime with him.”

“who gives a shit? i mean we know exactly what we are and what we aren’t, people are going to come up with their own impressions anyways so we should just be ourselves.” paul responds not understanding your worry.

“yeah, i know but i don’t want to have to always worry about our outings being the headline of the next ‘people’ magazine” you say trying to get him to understand.

“we’re already in the ‘people’ magazine.” pauls retorts.

“okay, well this is my decision whether or not you agree with it. only private hangouts from now on.”

“fine,” pauls says clearly not happy with your decision “maybe we should just fake date and like give them what they want and then we’ll break up and no one will care about us again”

“you’re actually insane for that, tell me that wasn’t an actual thought of yours.” you chuckle.

“i’m just trying to think of ways where i can enjoy the company of one of my best friends.”

“i just told you, private hangouts. there’s no way around it, that’s that.” you say sternly.

“you’re hot when you’re serious.” paul says, expecting a reaction from you.

“okay and that’s where we end this call, talk to you never.”

“mhm, love you too sweetie.”

that conversation happened about three months ago and you must say, paul had done an excellent job making sure you guys were never seen together. that’s one of the things you loved most about him, he may not be happy with your decisions but he’ll always respect and follow them. you know paul loves you and just wants to hang out with his best friend, but you can’t afford the damage of one misinterpreted photo affecting you for months out of your life. paul may not know it now, but this decision is benefiting him a lot.

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you took a shower right after paul left, you definitely needed it especially with all the vomit on you. you took your hangover medications that you’ve had for years. 

after your shower, you got into some comfy clothes and tied your hair up. you didn’t feel like putting in any effort to your appearance today, especially since paul already saw you this rough.  you grab your keys, wallet and phone and head out the door. you walk to a coffee shop and order a matcha latte and have an uber pick you up and take you to set. 

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the uber has dropped you off, and you make your way to set. as you walk past everyone, you’re getting so many awkward looks. the tension is extremely high, you walk past your favorite producer and he just puts his head down. finally, you make it to your chair only to be interrupted.

“hey, umm the director wants to see you…” emily says awkwardly, she’s the director’s assistant.

“okay, where is he?” you ask.

“he’s over by the food.”

“mkay, thanks.” you respond as you start making your way to the food area.

on your way there you bump into paul…he sure knows how to clean up.

“hey, you heading to steve?” he asks.

“what? yeah, are you?” you ask clearly confused.

“yeah, emily told me he wanted to see me. you think we’re in trouble?” he asks.

“i mean we haven’t done anything wrong so he probably just wants to talk about a scene or something.”

“maybe, did you see how people were staring when you walked in?”

“yeah it was super weird, they did it to you too?” you ask him.

“yeah, they did.” 

you arrive at the food area and you see your director, steve. he’s grabbing some grapes and putting them on his plate. you and paul both give each other a stare and start walking towards him. you notice that some people around you were staring as you went up to steve.

“sir, you wanted to see us?” you say as you lightly tap his shoulder.

“ahh, hello guys. yes, i did want to see you both. i just wanted to remind you guys that dating while filming is not my preference, and although we’re almost finished shooting i will not hesitate to replace you guys.”

“i’m sorry…what?” paul asks, clearly upset.

“yeah, where is all of this coming from?” you ask irritated.

“next time you guys sleep together, try to be a little more sneaky.” he says as he throws a phone on the table and walks away.

you and paul both go to look what’s on the phone and to your disdain it’s ‘people’ magazine with the big and bold title of  “actor, paul mescal, was seen leaving co-stars apartment, proving all of the rumors true.” and right below that, is a picture of paul looking straight into the camera, only a block away from your apartment.

“fuuuuuuuuck” paul almost whispers.

“you’ve got to be shitting me. this is fucking ridiculous.” you say.

“listen, i’m so sorry. i really tried to be sneaky.”

“no, it’s not your fault. i knew this would happen eventually, i was just hoping it would be after we wrapped.” you say disappointedly.

“well, i guess we just have to explain ourselves to steve and hope for the best.”

“yeah, i guess so.” you sigh.

you honestly weren’t mad at paul at all, after all it’s not like he was the one who made these pictures surface. but you were however, mad at everyone else for believing that shit. you had assumed that over the year and a half you’ve worked with these people, they would be able to figure out what was false and what wasn’t. of course, you were wrong in that thinking…

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you had just finished wrapping up filming for the day, you were so exhausted and honestly all you wanted to do was go home and get drunk again.

“hey, you did a great job today.” paul says, interrupting your thoughts.

“thank you paul, as did you,” you think for a moment “you wanna come over and have a drink?”

paul laughs. “you’re joking right?”

“what? why would i be joking?”

“well i mean you’re the one that’s always saying we can’t be seen together.” paul says, chuckling.

“well, we’ve already been ‘seen’ together so let’s just enjoy ourselves.” you say, really wanting some company.

“god, if only someone had said that before.” paul says sarcastically.

“are you coming or not?”

“sureee, since you want me sooo bad.” paul says teasingly.

“yeah yeah, fuck you.”

you grab your stuff and walk off set with paul. “did you bring your car?” you ask paul.

“no i got an uber this morning.” he responded.

“mmm okay, well i’ll give you a ride then.” you say.

you open your car door and paul walks over to left side, getting into the passenger seat. you both are in the car and you turn the heater on because of how cold it was. you have paul put on some music and you head back to your apartment. the music honestly became useless considering you guys were chatting the whole time, mostly talking about the rumors going around. 

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you eventually arrive at your apartment, both you and paul get out of the car. you unlock the gate and head inside, taking off your slides once you reach your front door. you unlock your door and let paul shut and lock it.

“i’m going to get in some more comfortable clothes, liquor’s in that cabinet.” you say pointing your finger to a cabinet right above the fridge.”

“alright.” pauls responds.

you quickly go in your room and grab some loose shorts and a hoodie, changing your socks as well. you make your way to the kitchen and find two glasses of wine. you loved wine.

“good choice paul good choice.”

“what can i say? i know you better than you give me credit for.”

“it sure appears that way,” you say in response. “come on let’s go sit on the couch, i’ll put on a movie.”

you and paul head to the couch sitting next to each other, you grab the remote and turn on the tv scrolling through peacock.

“mmm, we should watch ‘speak no evil’ it just came out” you say.

“yep, that’s fine by me.” paul says.

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“why the fuck wouldn’t they just go through the front door?!” you say, upset over the character’s choice.

you’re about an hour into the movie and seven glasses of wine into the night. over the night you and paul had managed to scoot closer to each other, you lay your head on his shoulder as you continue to watch the movie. you’re a lightweight when it comes to alcohol which is why you only ever drink around paul, you find yourself staring at paul as he’s watching the movie. his blue eyes appear darker than they actually are and his skin lighting up with every flash of the movie. paul eventually turns to face you, both of you just staring at each other. you look down at his lips as he looks down at yours, you bite the inside of your cheek. you continue to hold his gaze before finally returning back to the movie.

the movie comes to the end, and you guys both shuffle around. paul stretching and you doing the opposite, you were so tired. all you wanted to do right now was fall asleep. “paul, take me to my room please.” you ask, not even thinking about it.

“yes ma’am” paul responds as he picks you up and carries you to your room, laying you down on your comfortable and unmade bed. as soon as your body hits that mattress, a sense of relaxation clouds your body. you mumble a ‘thank you’ to him as you slowly drift off. 

“i’ll see you tomorrow then,” paul says as he walks to your door, he pauses for a moment before saying 

“i enjoy you so much, you don’t even understand.” 

“me too paul,” you tiredly mumble. “i love you, see you tomorrow.”

“goodnight lovely girl.”

hope you guys liked this, let me know if i should make it a series💕

requests and dms are opened, feel free to get in touch. also just turned on anonymous requests, i wanted to keep your thoughts private. love you guys !!

[astronomoney]

bookends, bestfriends, deadends

Pairing + WC: Jason Grace x reader, 1.6k Warnings: slow burn, once again and as always with my love Jason this is NOT canon-compliant, Jason may be a tiny bit ooc but I tired Summary: In the months between saving Hera and setting sail for New Rome, Jason finds himself making a friend Authors note: ok, y’all, here’s the deal; I took a nap and woke up with an idea, so I started writing; then I realized I needed set up, so I wrote this. Now I have a full fic that doesn’t include my original idea, so I will have to make pt: 2, but at least it’s already almost all the way written

Camp was far too busy this year; even for the off-season, it felt like there were campers everywhere. With all the bustle, it was hard to find a moment of peace. That’s why you’d taken to the woods that day. Following the path you’d walked a million times to a little outcrop of ruins not far from the beach, deep enough to not be disturbed. You’d taken a thick blanket and draped it over a vaguely couch-shaped block of stone ages ago to use as a reading nook. It was calm and peaceful and empty, usually.

This time, when you got close enough to see your little piece of peace, there was already someone there. A blonde boy with a scar on his lip sitting on your faux couch and squinting at the book in his hand. Jason Grace. Of course, you knew who he was, everyone knew of him and Piper and Leo, all working to get ready for the next great prophecy. 

Sneaking up on a former Roman soldier didn’t seem like the best plan, so you’d spoken out. “Guess this place isn’t so secret after all,” geez, what an opener.

Jason looked up with a start and got to his feet before you could say anything else. “Hi, hey, sorry, is this your spot? I wasn’t sure who’s it was, so I stayed to read some. I can go.” 

“Oh no, please, you don’t have to,” you were quick to put up your hands and stop him from leaving. You two hadn’t necessarily talked before, but he had always seemed nice at meals and campfires, if not a little awkward. “You were here first. I can leave if you want to be alone.”

Jason paused, it seemed he was actually taking you in now, noticing the book in your hand, Don Quixote as opposed to the copy of War and Peace he held. “I don’t mind company,” he offered you a small nervous smile, it was so pure you had to just stare at it for a second before responding. 

“Neither would I,” you finally said, returning the smile. You walked over and sat down tucking your legs under you and leaving plenty of room for Jason to sit on the other side. 

He joined and read next to you for what felt like both hours and minutes. Two days later, you had beaten him there, so when he arrived, you smiled and scooted to the left, giving him room again on your right. Over the next month, you crossed paths at the ruins what must have been a dozen times. There was never much conversation; it was more of a silent agreement to enjoy each other’s company, and each day, the distance between your shoulders seemed to get ever so slightly smaller. 

After a while, you got comfortable being directly next to him. Your shoulders would brush each time Jason moved to turn the page, and you couldn't help but notice how warm and strong he was. Silent meetings became small discussions about your current read, which turned into talks about other books you’d recommend to each other, which eventually morphed into a solid friendship. You would invite him to eat with your cabin since he had no one else at his. He would update you on the progress of the ship and the quest, you even got to know the other campers involved. 

Over the next few months, your lives became completely intertwined. You spent most of your day with each other. You watched him train for the quest, pushing his limits in sparring sessions until he was too exhausted to do much of anything. You would drag him out to your spot in the woods on days when he’d gotten so focused he had to be forced to take a break. You’d even tried to help him get some memories back. He would eat with you, read with you, help you with whatever chores you had around camp, anything to spend more time with together. 

He was the first person you turned to when you had something to say. He was the only one who remembered which campfire songs were your favorites or which books you’d reread depending on your mood. You cared about him so deeply, and you weren’t even sure how you’d come to feel so much in so little time. You truly hadn’t realized how much you needed him around you until you thought about just how soon he’d be leaving.

Of course, he would go back to Camp Jupiter; you knew that. This was never meant to be permanent; you were sure he missed his old life, his old friends, his old home. But part of you, somewhere in the deepest, most selfish part of your heart, wanted him to stay. You wanted him to forget about Rome, and Jupiter, and the quest. You wanted him to stay here with the strawberry fields and the books and the beach and with you. You wanted him to forget his sense of duty to a place that never cared and stay with someone who would give their whole heart away just to see him be happy for a moment longer. It was a feeling that filled you with guilt every time it crossed your mind.

It had occupied your thoughts nearly the entire day when Jason came to your cabin that evening. He knocked on the door until one of your siblings answered, and they called you over, muttering something about stupid and lovesick and so annoying that you hadn’t totally caught. 

You stepped onto the porch and closed the cabin door, leaving Jason and you alone in the dim light of the setting son. He was handsome as ever, a fact that you had resolved not to dwell on; plenty of people found their closest friends to be stunningly beautiful, it wasn’t a big deal. 

In fact, it was totally normal for someone to notice exactly when their best friend had skipped their usual haircut and started letting the military style grow or how their eyes exploded with color when the sun hit them just right. And, of course, there was no deeper reason for why you would pick up on every scrape or bruise he’d gotten from training. You were just hyper-observant, never mind that it only applied to one person.

As you took him in, scanning for the weariness you so often saw and he so often dismissed, you noticed more than anything how nervous he was. “What’s up?”

“Hey, um, I just wanted to, well.” He took a deep breath and let his words spill out a mile a minute. He told you that the Argo II would be ready to fly any day now. He told you how they were going to find Percy and how the first place they were going to check was New Rome. He brought up his old life, a life he wanted to remember, a life he thought he would remember when he got back there. These were all things you’d know and that filled you with dread, but you let him talk without interrupting. His rambling soon turned to a topic you haven’t expected, it turned to you. He told you how important you were to him, how much you’d helped him adjust to life at camp, and how much he appreciated everything you’d done for him. 

As he went on and on, you felt your heart begin to pound. The way he was talking lit a spark inside your gut, and the borderline desperation in his voice made you dare to hope. The emotion in his eyes made you think maybe, just maybe, he felt the same kind of connection that you felt with him. You could tell it was going somewhere important, somewhere that made him nervous and hopefully at the exact same time.

“I guess I just realized while we were planning in the bunker,” he began to close in on his point. “How important you are to me, and I can’t imagine what it’d be like without you. You can say no of course, it’s a lot to ask of anyone but,” he took another breath. “Do you want to come with me to New Rome?”

That wasn’t exactly what you were expecting. The funny feeling in your gut shifted and morphed, flashing through disappointment for a brief moment. As Jason waited for an answer, you had to process exactly what he’d asked. Going back to New Rome meant he was going back to his old life, a fact you were all too aware of, but now, maybe you didn’t have to lose him to it. He still wanted you by his side. He still wanted you to be a part of his life.

“Yes,” you finally replied. “Yes, of course, I’ll go,” you watch the relief wash over him, his nerves visibly dispersing as one of the widest smiles you’d ever seen etched itself across his face. 

In the next moment, he wrapped his arms around you. It was a bone-crushing hug that squeezed the air from your lungs, and you wrapped your own arms around him as tightly as you could. “You have no idea how happy that makes me,” he whispered to you as you tried to stop your heart from exploding. This wasn’t how you wanted it, but at least for now, this would be enough.

≻───── ⋆���⋆ ─────≺

There's pt1 :) part two is almost done already because I wrote most of it before I even started all this, but what I can say, the keyboard got away from me. let me know if any of y'all want to be tagged in pt2 or in my general Jason taglist.

[shrinkthisviolet]

im curious. why do you ship flashvibe. i see them as just best 100% platonic bros and i cant imagine them romantic

Ooh this would be a better question for @alittleflashvibe (who can absolutely feel free to hop in with reblogs or comments or whatever, really 👀) but I will take a crack at it myself:

So first of all, let me preface by saying, none of this is going to be me going “see?? No platonic explanation!!” because that’s a) canonically false and b) nonsense. Barrisco, for all that I do ship them, is canonically a friendship, and I value that highly. You can absolutely choose to interpret this all as solely platonic, and that’s totally fine! Their relationship is strong either way, and it’s not “better” or “worse” from either perspective. So just keep that in mind.

Second of all, I’ll assume you’re someone who’s open to shipping Barry with guys (otherwise this discussion is sorta pointless 😅).

Third of all, this will include comparisons to Westallen because...duh, they're canonically romantic, and I need a point of comparison. I love both ships, mind you, this is simply for academic purposes.

With all that said, let’s begin! And since this got long, the rest is below the cut :) enjoy!

Heart Eyes:

Okay so we know Barry does this a lot, right? Almost exclusively with Iris (his canon best-friend-who-he-has-a-crush-on -> girlfriend/fiancée -> wife)…and with Cisco. Cisco, too, does this a lot. Observe, if you will:

This post by the amazing @icedteaandoldlace (who can also hop in if so inclined), compares the Westallen proposal and the "the unvierse wants us to be bros" speech. No, seriously. Look at how alike the scenes are. Barry's heart eyes in those scenes...IMMACULATE! He doesn't give those heart eyes to anyone else

Bonus: notice Cisco’s reactions when we do see them. Earnestly hanging on Barry’s words…and Barry’s encouragement gets him to smile 🥰 just like Iris whenever Barry encourages her (see: the s4 scene when he encourages her as Team Leader and she smiles sincerely through her tears)!

Also...this parallel: "You've always been my hero" ~Barry to Cisco as he's walking toward sort-of-death + "The Flash may be the city's hero, but you, Barry Allen, you're my hero." ~Iris to Barry in her vows

Physical Touch:

Physical touch is canonically the way Barry shows his affection/love (“we all know touch is your love language” is a canon line of dialogue). He does it with Joe, Henry, Iris…and a lot with Cisco, who constantly touches/hugs Barry too:

Something interesting about that last one…I feel like I’ve seen that one somewhere before:

(I made that gif :D)

Oh and uh...remember when I said we'd get back to talking about Cisco doing something risky to save his life? Let's talk about that for a second.

Let's talk about how Iris and Cisco react to losing/the prospect of losing Barry post-s3/s4 and s6:

Post-s3:

Iris: Quits her job, becomes Team Leader in Barry's absence so she can use her skills to help out, wanting to honor Barry's words ("keep growing, keep loving, keep running, for me") and knowing Cisco can't lead the Team alone because he's strung out. Argues with Cisco about getting Barry back, because she is understandably worried that it'll make things worse, cost them someone else...and/or Barry will either already be dead, or will die as a result of their actions (i.e. she fears losing Barry all over again)

Cisco: Hyperfocuses on saving Barry ("quits his job", so to speak, because he's not being Team Leader as Barry intended), uses his skills to help out by building a Quark sphere to save Barry, goes forward with his plan despite Iris's misgivings so he can honor Barry's words ("he also said that everyone would look to me after he was gone. So look to me."). In the aftermath, modifies the suit extensively because he fears losing Barry all over again)

s6:

Iris: Is distraught and horrified at how easily Barry accepts his death, tries to talk him out of it. She takes up the charge of recruiting Ryan Choi, Paragon of Humanity, empathizes with him about his fear, draws on their similarities to convince him.

(She does not pull risky manuevers here, since it's E90 Barry who saves our Barry, but she did back in s3, when she shot Savitar, a speedster and her almost-killer (and also a future version of Barry), to save Barry's life)

Cisco: Makes a risky call to try and save Barry's life, defends himself fiercely when Barry gets upset about it, is distraught and horrified at how easily Barry accepts his death

Bonus:

it's relief in Barry's eyes there, and worry. Barry was mad at Cisco earlier in the episode, but...in this moment, none of that matters. Cisco's doing something risky to save his life (as he canonically does often) and Barry's relieved but also terrified it might go sour. And...well, you saw from one of the gifs earlier how enthusiastic he was once this rescue succeeded - he beamed up at him, all "you've always been my hero" (canon quote) and took his hand to be helped up, just like in a fairytale.

Just a couple of guys nerding out together 🥰

Barry using a shared memory to prove he's not an imposter 👀

Iris and Cisco teaming up to pull Barry out of the Speed Force! Note that Cisco almost succeeds at this 👀 he only fails because Barry is not yet ready to leave - by the time Iris tries, Barry is ready. I've always thought Cisco could've pulled Barry out of the Speed Force too, lightning-rod style.

This post compares some Westallen and Barrisco moments! Specifically, some Iris and Cisco reactions to Barry (very similar, you'll note!)

And there you go! As mentioned, none of this is me going "AHA see, Barrisco is definitely romantic", but moreso pointing out why I ship them via their parallels to Westallen (which is widely considered one of the It Ships of DC in general, especially for Barry). Hopefully this changed your mind, and if not, hopefully you enjoyed the ride anyway!

(and I meant what I said: @alittleflashvibe and @icedteaandoldlace, feel free to weigh in. Same for any other Barrisco shippers! I'm sure I didn't get everything, though I did try to hit the major highlights)

[milesmyrales]

your watch read 11:32 PM, yet you're still awake, standing on deck and staring into the wide ocean that looks like it leads to nothing. maybe you weren't sleepy, maybe you're still hungry, maybe you needed a drink to calm you down. calm you down from what exactly?

maybe it was from the overwhelming thoughts about a certain blonde on the ship.

maybe it's because he's standing right next to you too.

it wasn't long since he joined you to watch the ocean waves and the moonlight shining through the waters, though he didn't bother to say anything let alone start a conversation. it was quite calming honestly, it wasn't bad to have some company at night.

you've had your eye on sanji for a few months now, not wanting to ruin the friendship you already have with him you decided to keep your mouth shut. it was a wise choice, seeing that he couldn't have possibly feelings for you too. you were just a mere crewmate for him, nothing more and nothing less.

girls practically fawn over him. i mean, who wouldn't? he's such a sweetheart, such a gentleman, and such a flirt too. he flirts with every girl he sees, including you.

but to you, sanji isn't just an amazing cook, a sweetheart, a gentleman, and a flirt. in your eyes he's much more than that.

you notice a lot of things from him. from the way he precisely follows the steps for a recipe, how he smugs his face whenever he argues with zoro, the way he refuses to use his hands to fight because he's afraid to lose them, and losing them means not being able to cook anymore, and how he looks into the eyes of every girl he flirts with that's not you.

the wind is strong enough to sway your hair back, you glance at the blonde that's beside you.

and there he was, holding his cigarette in one hand while the other fits comfortably in his pocket, his hair slightly moving because of the wind. oh, how you wish you could cherish this moment forever.

he turned to look at you, "enjoying the view, darling?"

the nickname rolled off smoothly as if he was destined to call you that. you smiled as you nodded, "what about you? and what brings you here at almost midnight?" you replied.

he sighed, "a lot of thoughts. seems like you're also here for the same reason." you slightly smile at his response, also curious about what could be on his mind for him to be awake at this time.

you both continued standing side by side, enjoying each other's presence. your heart beating slightly by just being alone with him.

"have you got any advice for confessing?" sanji asked suddenly, his gaze still hovering over the waters.

your eyes widened, what lucky girl could've received a confession from sanji himself? surely he was just bluffing, right? there's no way he's in love with someone on the ship-

"nami... she's just so incredible," he said softly like a whisper but still audible to your ears.

ah, so it's her. you should've known it from the start, the way he looked at her as if he was looking into a treasure chest full of diamonds and gold. the way he secretly cares for her and the way his gaze automatically searches for her in a crowded place says a lot.

she's something that you're not. she's everything else that you're not.

sanji continues to ramble about almost everything about her, you decide to play along and pretend to listen, pretend to be interested, and play along to give the pieces of advice that he asked for.

you felt slightly lightheaded, wanting this conversation to end as soon as possible. how you wished he was talking about you instead of her. but that will probably never happen no matter how many times you've tried to be your best and get the blonde's attention.

you felt stupid. why would you keep chasing him who wouldn't even give the same effort, why would you keep chasing him who doesn't even have feelings for you?

you held your tears back, and for right now, just for today, you decided to bury your feelings even more. if it's for his sake. if it's for both yours and his sake.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

That theory in Riddle being sexually abused by a Doctor figure and the behaviours he depicted + the talk on unsympathetic victims... Kind of violently reminded me of Severus, and especially his Worst memory where the Marauders did what they did to him. Even his bond with Lily was this unhealthy dependency I think? Well not the right word. But Lily was the only thing keeping him sane and going I feel.

Anonymus: Adding on to the previous ask about Sev and Lily and unsympathetic victims. Do you think the Evans ever acted for Severus the way the weasleys did for Harry? A safe retreat? Do you think they ever tried to report Tobias? How do you interpret Sev and Lil's bond? I know a lot of the fandom thinks Sev was infatuated with her/ romantically loved her...but I often felt that Severus raised Lily to a holy Mary status, and that while he did in fact love her, it was platonic (in which case there is a comment to be made about the way platonic love between opp sex PPL is perceived and ridiculed)

I'm not the op of the post you mentioned, but yeah, Severus is a great example of an unsympathetic victim. Personally, he isn't a character I like all that much, but he is undeniably an interesting one. This turned out a little rambly, but that's what I got.

We don't know how SWM ended, but, yeah... not pleasant regardless of how far it went.

Severus was definitely a victim of abuse, both at his home and school and what he went through was awful. That victimhood doesn't excuse his treatment of students in his care. Like, I had a temporary position as an instructor for teenagers, and Severus' treatment of his students makes me want to throttle him a bit.

But as a child, as a teen — he definitely didn't deserve the life he got. Dumbledore has a tendency to turn a blind eye to abuse for various reasons, which ended up fucking a lot of people over, Snape included. (Tom and Hary too)

As for Severus' dependence on Lily, yeah, I think he was incredibly fixated on her. I agree with you that that fixation isn't necessarily romantic. Lily, was essentially Severus' first friend — his best friend. Lily was to Snape what Ron was to Harry in a way. The first person he felt he could trust.

I went through The Prince's Tale to refresh my memory on all of this, and I wanna talk about his friendship with Lily first, actually.

“. . . thought we were supposed to be friends?” Snape was saying, “Best friends?” “We are, Sev, but I don’t like some of the people you’re hanging round with! I’m sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he’s creepy! D’you know what he tried to do to Mary MacDonald the other day?” Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, sallow face. “That was nothing,” said Snape. “It was a laugh, that’s all—” “It was Dark Magic, and if you think that’s funny—” “What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?” demanded Snape. His color rose again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

(DH, 569)

Severus sees himself and Lily as best friends. He's happy when she dislikes James, but, he never makes any attempt to become romantic with her. It can be read either way, but personally, I like to read it as a close friendship.

(A little unrelated note about the above quote I saw someone mention once somewhere: Severus knows James fancies Lily, and warns her about it in that same conversation above, and It's interesting he raises Lily's potential romantic interest in James as a retort when she says she doesn't know what he sees in Mulciber. Is anyone shipping Mulciber/Severus? 👀)

I mentioned in this post how I believe Severus' Patronus is a doe because he sees Lily as his defender. Even after all these years. And I think, that too, can be about friendship. Because Liy was his first friend, his first defender. The fact that in SWM we see her step in to defend him suggests to me it happened before. That Lily stepped in to defend Severus, so when he calls for a guardian, in the form of a Patronus, it's still Lily.

And after SWM, Severus is less concerned about what happened to him, he's more concerned about losing Lily. That was the worst thing about that memory. Not his humiliation or assualt, but the loss of his first, and probably only best friend. I don't think he ever trusted someone else like he trusted Lily:

“I’m sorry.” “I’m not interested.” “I’m sorry!” “Save your breath.” It was nighttime. Lily, who was wearing a dressing gown, stood with her arms folded in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, at the entrance to Gryffindor Tower. “I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.” “I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just—” “Slipped out?” There was no pity in Lily’s voice.

(DH, 571)

Is he a blood-purist who thinks Lily is a perfect muggleborn and therefore an exception to everything? Yes. Severus is in the wrong here about calling Lily a mudblood and thinking it's fine because she's a good mudblood, she's not like the other muggleborns. Lily has every right to cease her friendship with him over it.

But it's telling about his priorities the first thing he does is try to fix their friendship, to apologize to her.

Did he deserve to be hanged upside down and likely stripped in the middle of a large audience at school? Hell no. James probably didn't see it as a big deal, but it's so messed up I don't really know what to say, really. Like, I think Severus definitely fought back and wasn't always the victim of the Marauders, though. In the scene I mentioned above with Mulciber it's implied Severus and his Death Eater buddies are just as bad as James and the Marauders are. Their targets are just different. I think what James did is awful and inexcusable, but at the same time, I think, in the same way Tom Riddle hung Billy's rabbit to scare his bullies away, Severus tried to do the same, if less successfully. It's why he invented spells like Langlock (used in SWM on him) and Sectumsempra.

A lot of his demeanor is the result of abuse. He bullies and scares his students because he's mimicking his father, his abuser. he learned from him to control by force, with fear threats, and degradation. Because that's what Severus experienced as a child. Also, the fact he became a professor as young as he did, meant he felt had to force his students to take him seriously. Some of his first students probably saw him in his lowest moments as a student himself. So, he resorted to the fear and insults that his father likely used when he wanted to be taken seriously.

I truly think the loss of Lily's friendship is what stung the most about the whole ordeal of SWM. I mean, Severus has a lot of bad memories. I'm sure this wasn't the only time he was humiliated and assaulted. He was abused by his father. He was almost killed by Lupin as a werewolf during the prank. And then he joined a terrorist organization where he was likely tortured, where he likely watched people die. And in all of this, his worst memory is this one case of assault that I doubt was the only one? This doesn't make much sense to me, I think it's his worst memory not because of what happened to him, but because he lost his friendship with Lily over what he considers a "stupid slip".

And yeah, after Lily's death, in his mind, Snape raised her to a saintly status. He never has a mean thought about her, because he feels guilty over her death. He feels like he killed his only defender. So, of course, his memories of her are colored like she was perfect. That's how he wants to remember her so he can keep feeling guilty and hating himself over it. He feels like he deserves to feel that way. This is something you see with victims of abuse, they rationalize their abuse by convincing themselves they deserve it.

And Snape is a very bitter character who doesn't want to get better.

As for whether I think he found solace in the Evans household the same way Harry did with the Weasleys? The answer is yes actually. And there's some evidence for it.

Lily knew things weren't good at home for Severus:

“How are things at your house?” Lily asked. A little crease appeared between his eyes. “Fine,” he said. “They’re not arguing anymore?” “Oh yes, they’re arguing,” said Snape. He picked up a fistful of leaves and began tearing them apart, apparently unaware of what he was doing. “But it won’t be that long and I’ll be gone.”

(DH, 563-564)

And Severus mentioned later in that conversation how his father doesn't just not like magic — he doesn't like anything. Severus and his mother are very clearly implied to be abused by his father when his mother is mentioned. He doesn't describe much of what goes on at home, he tries to act fine, but I'm calling it abuse because of what it most likely is. Severus can't wait to leave home as an eleven-year-old. This isn't something that usually happens in healthy households.

Additionally, Severus spent enough time in their house it was conceivable he and Lily snuck into Petunia's room to find her letter to Hogwarts:

“You shouldn’t have read—” whispered Petunia, “that was my private—how could you—?” Lily gave herself away by half-glancing toward where Snape stood nearby. Petunia gasped. “That boy found it! You and that boy have been sneaking in my room!”

(DH, 566)

So, he probably stayed over with the Evans parents most of the day and only returned home to sleep. That's what I think happened. And, Lily's parents seem very kind and accepting of magic from what little we hear of them:

Lily glanced toward her parents, who were looking around the platform with an air of wholehearted enjoyment, drinking in the scene. Then she looked back at her sister, and her voice was low and fierce

(DH, 566)

“You knew?” said Harry. “You knew I’m a — a wizard?” “Knew!” shrieked Aunt Petunia suddenly. “Knew! Of course we knew! How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was? Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that — that school — and came home every vacation with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she was — a freak! But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!”

(PS, 41)

I think Severus preferred the Evans house over his own. His own where his parents argued and his father abused him and his mother. Where his parents both worked and left him wandering the streets as a young child.

As for whether the Evans parents ever tried to report Tobias, we just don't really know. I'd say no. Domestic abuse in the 1970s was still largely unrecognized and not treated legally and medically like it is today. So, I don't think they'd have anyone to report to even if they wanted to. Especially with where the Snapes lived, which was essentially slums that the police didn't bother with anyway.

[stromuprisahat]

Leigh treated change and development as a testament of greed and lust in SoB trilogy. She didn't let Alina grow into her power or ditch relationships where her boundaries were not respected. Nor did she let her actually make a change from a political viewpoint. In SoC duology, neither the narrative or the characters shame Nina for addiction or dramatic, dark change of her powers. (Ik helnik is unrealistic, but let's forget that ship for a second.) Also, flaws of the relationships between characters were more acknowledged. Like, Jesper and Kaz's friendship and one-sided crush is messy and is treated as such. Jan Van Eck gets treated like the asshole he is. Colm obviously loves Jesper and vice versa, but they both majorly screwed up, realize it and apologise. (Jesper screwing up his life is a direct consequence of his father screwing up). Not to mention Kaz and Jordie, or even the way Kaz treats other Dregs (I mean minor characters like Anika, Imogen and Pim). I thought Leigh learned her lesson but then the disaster that is KoS duology happened so now I just don't know. I haven't read any of her works outside of Grishaverse, so Idk if she keeps okaying abusive relationships or what values she's pushing outside of that. Any thoughts?

I think Leigh might've taken the success of SoC as too literal instruction manual for her next books without realizing a single formula doesn't fit every story.

She tried to turn Ravkan Gang into Crows 2.0, including banter, even though they're supposed to be half a generation older leaders of a country, not teenage criminals. I won't even begin about the tragedy of errors she turned her new best girl character design into.

She also doesn't seem to be willing to admit that a good leader cannot remain morally pure or that a "good" person doesn't mean an all-loving fool. When working in the criminal underground, she allows her characters to get their Hands Dirty (See, what I did there? :D), but as someone incredibly naïve and uncomprehending matters of politics, she's trying to maintain the pedestal she decided to put her state leaders at.

The result is a frustrating, unrealistic mess.

You can take a heist story with a grain of salt, but political drama requires completely different level of believability.

[critter-genfic-events]

Fjord: A Critter Gen-fic Rec List

This week, we have seven fics focusing on our favorite sea-faring paladin, Fjord! From his early days as a gangly ship hand to the charismatic captain facing down a demi-god, this list has it all. Check them out beneath the cut, and remember to comment and kudos if you like them!

Shelter by Demenior (30269,Teen) Warnings: None Pairings:Caduceus Clay & Fjord, Fjord & The Mighty Nein

Fjord is called to action by the Wildmother. Caduceus is supportive. The Nein have to admit they still aren't good with kids.

Reccer says: There's a lot of focus on Fjord's friendship with the rest of the Nein, great characterization, and some great kids

cabin fever by justlikeswitchblades (3032,General) Warnings: suicial ideation and filing down teeth as self harm Pairings: Fjord & Vandran

Fjord doesn't like staying in Port Damali. Vandran notices his restlessness and talks to him about it.

Reccer says: I liked it

Troubled Water by CitizenMocha (1327,General) Warnings: None Pairings: Fjord & Melora the Wildmother (Critical Role), Fjord/Jester Lavorre

With/in spite of most of the Mighty Nein gathered in their new home, Fjord takes a little time to himself to try and reconnect with the Wildmother.

Reccer says: Fjord deserves a little breakdown during the Mighty Nein Uk'otoa fight. As a treat. (it's also painful and very well described)

Fjord's Very Best Day by enemytosleep (3902,Teen) Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence Pairings:

A disastrous storm, a deep betrayal, and an unexpected stroke of luck: Fjord has had a very busy night, and now, a very wild day.

Reccer says: Fjord makes some interesting choices after washing up to shore, and this fic does a great job exploring them - along with having some wonderfully evocative language

Numb My Lungs in the Salt Air, Let The Breakers Heal My Bones by thetickingclock (1481,Teen) Warnings: Major Character Death, Grief/Mourning Pairings: Fjord & Caduceus, Fjord/Jester

The complicated relationship between Fjord and the ocean.

Reccer says: I liked it

Let the Current Take Me by Essek wants some peace and quiet and Fjord tries to pay forward a kindness (4424,Teen) Warnings: brief discussion of suicide Pairings: Fjord & Essek Thelyss

Essek wants some peace and quiet and Fjord tries to pay forward a kindness

Reccer says: Essek and Fjord have a great chemistry together - both are understated button pushers, and as the fic says, they can speak 'liar to liar'. This fic is a great demonstration of that

oh, the things you can hide under a corset (yourself, for one) by mx_mythical (1292,General) Warnings: usage of she/her for Fjord before he figures out he's trans, fantasy racism Pairings:

A study of transmasc Fjord, growing up

Reccer says: Fjord is all about performing masculinity and learning how to be comfortable as yourself, so it makes so much sense to see a trans take on him

This is one of our weekly communally-generated gen rec lists. Every week we announce a new theme and allow anyone to submit a fic recommendation. Please note that the summary and content notes are provided by the reccer, and may be different than what the author has provided. Please assume good intentions all around. <3

And hey, anyone includes you!

Next week, we'll be focusing on Mentorship! We are also switching to our twice a month schedule, so you can expect to see the Mentorship rec list on July 15th, followed by the Scanlan focused rec list on August 1st!

Any fics coming to mind? Well, then use this form to submit!

Oh! Also! Critter Gen Week is happening! We've been using the themes for our reclist - so if you're inspired by what you're reading, consider writing (or making art) for that week!

[loganofthenorth]

Thinking of writing a Shera Swap AU where Catra is the one that leaves the Horde and Adora is the one that stays behind.

Glimmer and Bo are switched with Scorpia. Glimmer is Hordac’s daughter and Bo is her best friend who was one of the orphans that lived in the Horde Base

Shadow Weaver is still at the Horde because that’s important for Catra and Adora’s characters

Glimmer’s parents were both trapped on that island and Hordac attempted to use Glimmer’s mother DNA to help make a more stable and more powerful clone of himself which is what resulted in Glimmer

Also just realized Catra would be Shera and have her own Shera form

Entrapta is recruited by the Horde first but during an invasion of Bright Moon gets captured by Catra and Scorpia. Due to being overworked and disrespected in the Horde she switches sides and joins Bright Moon’s forces

The Princess Alliance is still standing strong because rather than surrender to the Horde Scorpia’s Grandfather stayed loyal to the Alliance and Micah’s sister took over Brightmoon so Angelica wasn’t there to call off the Alliance. I’m thinking that some of the characters in the alliance are switched around but only Entrapta starts out on the Horde’s side.

Might switch Sea Hawk and Mermista’s roles and make him the ocean kingdom’s Prince and Mermista’s this angsty sailor that’s like: Fiiiine. I guess I can take you to meet the Prince that simps for me for some reason.

Perfuma’s kingdom probably takes a similar stance to the frost Kingdom where they claim neutrality. Since they don’t like the violent form of the current Princess Alliance but don’t like the Horde either they want nothing to do with the war. This makes things complicated when Scorpia starts crushing hard on Perfuma during Princess Prom, since Princess Prom is hosted here instead.

Frosta’s Kingdom is part of the Alliance but Frosta and Scorpia don’t get along because she doesn’t respect Scorpia.

Essentially Season 1 is, rather than trying to get back the alliance, Catra goes around trying to make everyone respect Scorpia.

Adora is this hard core rule follower that is angry with Catra for betraying their cause. She also believes there’s a lot of good in the Horde and she can bring it out. In this world the Princess Alliance and the Horde are both equally morally questionable, so it’s more a political war than anything. Adora is trying to make it so that the Horde is morally superior since the people she loves most (Catra, Shadow Weaver, and Glimmer) have a more negative view on the world as a whole including themselves and she wants to fix that.

Hordac is a menacing war criminal but secretly a dork and a really good Dad. Glimmer is a menace to society.

Kyle and the other two, Rogelio and Ladie I think, still are at the Horde. Bo has an awkward friendship with the three of them because he’s too nice to go away. Ladie and Glimmer constantly bud heads and Glimmer picks on Kyle so Rogelio gets angry with her a lot. Bo and Adora tend to play peacekeeper a lot.

Shadow Weaver is a very tired drunk Mom that sees Adora and Bo as her saving grace. Still a manipulative bitch though but since this is a swap AU she tends to manipulate things so they work out for the greater good rather than her own selfish purposes. She also tries to make people think she’s worse than she actually is rather than better than she actually is.

Also I think the Horde in cannon is based in Scorpia’s Kingdom, so in this one it will be based in Mustacoger because Shadow Weaver became Mustacoger’s Queen.

Glimmer doesn’t know she’s a Princess by technicality and will sense her connection with the gem during the invasion on Bright Moon.

Cannon ships still apply. Might also ship Castapella and Shadow Weaver but not sure yet.

Though now that I think about it Entrapdac might not work in this AU… Unless Hordac wasn’t aware that Entrapta was being mistreated. Then again he’s also her former friend’s dad in this AU which would be weird…

I’ll figure out where Entrapta stands later. She deserves to be loved and accepted.

Though I could just have Castapella adopt her and then she gets healthy parental love. She doesn’t necessarily need romantic love to be loved and accepted.

OH AND DOUBLE TROUBLE

Double Trouble probably gets hired by Adora to spy on Catra and the others but likes Catra better so switches sides. Then keeps switching sides to help push along Catra and Adora’s character development like in cannon.

Maybe I could have Entrapta and Double Trouble be together…

I dunno. We’ll see what happens.

I’ll probably go really in depth into all the characters because I love doing that.

Yeah the more I think about this the more I want to do it. Stay tuned cause I might post hero forges for the character designs later. (I can’t draw very well so hero forge is easier.)

[bryverros]

YAP MY LIEGE WHAT ARE THE HAPPENINGS IN THY KINGDOM

im going to be real immature on main so turn a blind eye guys

so. my beloved firefighter show. first, a brief introduction to the massive fandom drama. we have buck, eddie and tommy. buck and eddie are best friends since season 2 episode 1 (we are on season 8), tommy becomes an important(?) character in season 7.

- buck and tommy are canonically in a relationship. i want them broken up asap. its not even personal. i just dont think they work, even all the buckandeddie theories aside. and if they do break up, i will call it a win and clap my hands jollily. their fanbase is honestly making me feel stupid because theyre acting like bucktommy is this soulmates endgame couple and i tried seeing it. but i just dont.

exhibit 1. eddie appears in practically every single bucktommy scene. and when he didnt appear directly, he sure as hell was mentioned. a lot. which??? weird??? considering the fact that bucktommy are supposed to be in a relationship and very in love. like maybe i dont know shit about dating but im pretty sure that its objectively weird to include the best friend in all scenes the couple has. so far, in s8, buck and tommy had one (1) scene. and it had eddie in it.

then there’s the whole weird thing on how buck and tommy got together in the first place and one might argue that buck was trying to get eddie’s attention, not tommy’s. so like yeah eddie sure is haunting their narrative a lot and for seemingly no reason which kind of stops me from feeling attached to the ship. which i tried initially before i started praying on their breakup.

- in the scenes buck and tommy (+eddie. cant forget that he was there) did have. sigh. their dynamics is just weird. first of all, tommy is older than buck. like, he was in the flashbacks of the older coworkers (he was kind of racist and kind of homophobic and misogynistic in those too, but ok ill let that pass, people change blah blah). and he called buck kid before they got together. which. sigh. im generally against age gaps i dont fw that stuff and theyre not letting me forget that they do have an age gap. but fine, ill put the age gap aside. theyre both adults so yk. surely it wont be THAT bad. alas. it is. moving to the next exhibit

exhibit 2. the bachelor party. so buck is really excited to organise this themed party for their his brother in law (a dude tommy was kind of racist towards in the flashback btw). the theme is. 80s. buck and eddie do matching costumes (suggested by eddie. very enthusiastically)! matching each others freak! yay! what does tommy do. he arrives in a henley. and as a person who kind of relates to buck in a way that i get excited about things. tommy’s low effort uninterestingness wouldve kind of been hurtful to me? like the way he casually kind of discarded that excitement buck had about this party was giving “im not interested in your interests babe 🫶” and from personal experience! not nice! and buck already had like a shit ton of self esteem issues and like yeah im projecting but please please break up w tommy you deserve better buck please

- name. so evan buckley has been going by buck. everyone calls him buck except his parents (bad. he doesnt like that) and his sister. sometimes. tommy calls him evan all the fucking time. which feels. condescending. i do not like it in the slightest. break up bucktommy. for me. please.

now! onto the clowning part.

ok look. buck and eddie. theyre so special. their friendship is so special. and if they go canon. that would be absolutely historical. like a queer non established from the beginning romance? that has 6+ years of shared history? they were friends before they were lovers and they could be THE friends to lovers in my eyes. and look if they dont go romantic, i really wont be that sad? their friendship kind of remains regardless so like while i do think it would be bold and take some good writing to have them go down the romantic line. i also do really cherish their friendship. but i am strongly gaslit that they will go romantic. to the point where i fear that im clowning about it.

- the actor playing buck recently said that he wants some slowburn for buck. some will they wont they kind of relationship. that the audience will have to yearn for. like my man your character is in a relationship and that relationship came together in, let me check… 2 episodes? slowburn? bucktommy? i have a VERY hard time believing that. there were a whole bunch of other quotes that could be interpreted as bucktommy breakup (yay 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶). like you dont see any other member of the cast speaking about their love interest the same way this man does about tommy.

- the episodes 5 and 6 are centred on buck and eddie respectively. episode 5 will have tommy “weirded out by something about buck” (surprise surprise). episode 6 is called confessions. eddie has a lot of potential queer coding (eddie: “i just hate having to date. it feels like i have to perform”; someone else about eddies relationship: “just make sure youre following your heart. not christopher’s [his son]” ahh stuff). and episode 6 is centred on him. it also is coming out on nov 7th, 2 days after the infamous destiel election day. so having eddies coming out in that episode would be the funniest thing ever. and the marketing for these episodes is driving me insane. like. will they. wont they. will they. wont they. i feel like im clowning so hard but i also feel like i cant be wrong about this stuff yk? too many coincidences?

so yeah. episode 5 is coming out today. wish me luck (bucktommy breakup ⁉️)

[virtie333]

Trifecta

Well, hello! First of all, thank you to my regular readers who followed me over to this ship. Second, for those who don’t know me, I usually write for straight monogamous relationships, namely Damerey. But I’ve been wanting to sail on this ship for a long time, and finally got the guts to visit.

It must be noted that while Finn and Poe are in a committed sexual relationship at the beginning of this story, I myself do not know enough about gay sex to be comfortable writing it. Yet. Therefore, this first foray of mine will be focusing on Rey and what her boys can do for her. I may venture further into their relationship in the future.

As always, all sexual relations are consensual and loving!

Explicit Sexual Content, Polyamory (MMF), Oral Sex (both M and F receiving), P in V (all are on Star Wars version of birth control), Multiple Female Orgasms (It’s my party!), Creampie x 2, Way Too Many Emotions Just under 7k Words

Also found on AO3

Rey was dozing as she sat on the floor, her back against the sofa, the holomovie that BB-8 was projecting in front of her nearing the end, when a soft sigh of pleasure jerked her awake. Grimacing slightly, she glanced over her shoulder at the two people cuddled on the sofa behind her, knowing what she would see. Finn sat with his head resting on Poe’s shoulder, a smirk on his face, as Poe sat with his eyes shut tight, his jaw slack, his breathing heavy. A blanket covered their laps, but Rey was pretty sure she knew what was going on underneath.

With a soft sigh of her own, she turned back to the movie. She wasn’t mad. How could she be mad? The two people she loved most in the galaxy had finally realized they loved each other and had settled into a committed, faithful relationship. They were still her best friends and still in her life, sharing an apartment just down the hall from her own. She was so very happy for them.

But there were still times they inadvertently made her feel so alone.

It wasn’t their fault. They did an amazing job of including her in everything they did, and they never made her feel like she wasn’t wanted. She was busy enough that they had plenty of private time without her, so when she was with them it always felt like the three of them were whole once more, as it had been during the war, when they first bonded with each other. But when it was late, and they were all tired, the two men tended to get handsy with each other, and while she knew they made an effort to not make her uncomfortable, she was far too attuned to the both of them to not notice what was going on.

The last few months since the war’s official end had been busy for all of them. Finn had set off with Lando Calrissian and Jannah to start looking for his birth family as soon as he was able. Rey had hated seeing him go. She had formed a strong attachment to the former stormtrooper, and had even thought there might be more than friendship once upon a time, but when Finn’s attention had turned to Rose, Rey had stopped thinking like that about him. Eventually, he and Rose’s relationship had turned into just friendship, but then the war had ended and he had headed off to seek his past. She supported him completely, but missed him while he was gone.

Fortunately, she still had Poe. When the newly formed Intergalactic Alliance had asked her to join their efforts as they tried to establish a new, peaceful government on Coruscant, she couldn’t help but say yes. Temporarily. When Poe had also accepted their request for his help, she had been overjoyed, knowing she wouldn’t be alone. And Poe had indeed stayed with her through it all, joking that he was protecting her from unscrupulous politicians and making sure she wasn’t taken advantage of. She knew it wasn’t a joke; he really did scare off anyone that even thought about using her for their own political goals. They acquired apartments next to each other and spent most of their free time together, already planning for the day when they could leave the newborn government and do what they really wanted. Poe wanted to start a flight school and Rey, of course, wanted to start training young Jedi. Poe knew the perfect planet for both schools.

The day they learned that Finn had found his home planet, and that both his parents and his two siblings had been killed years ago trying to defend him and other children from the First Order, they had both immediately taken leave and come to him. They brought him back with them to Coruscant, and without almost any discussion at all, he had moved in with Poe. Rey had been so happy to see the two of them finally settle together; it was inevitable, she had thought. They were meant for each other.

Just as she was meant to be alone.

Rey closed her eyes and tried to focus on the words and sounds coming from the movie. She tried to tell herself she wasn’t jealous. How could she be jealous? It’s not like she had ever had a physical, romantic relationship. Why should she miss something she had never had? But maybe… maybe that was her problem. Maybe she was just… horny. Maybe she should take a lover, someone to help her discover the intimacies of sex without the emotional attachment. Could she do that? Could she trust someone enough to become physical with them?

The credits began to roll and she opened her eyes. Now was her chance to escape. She yawned and stretched her arms up into the air. “I think I fell asleep,” she said. “Did I miss anything?”

“Naw,” Poe grumbled good naturedly. “It really wasn’t that good. We need to pick something better next time.”

“I told you,” Finn argued back. “We should have picked Beckett’s Last Stand. That one looked good!”

Rey looked back just in time to see Poe roll his eyes. She laughed, then pushed herself to her feet. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” she told them softly, her heart swelling with emotion as she looked at her boys, still cuddled together on the sofa. She really didn’t want to leave, but she knew she couldn’t stay. “Have a good night.” She turned toward the door.

“Rey?” Finn sat forward suddenly.

She looked at him, then at Poe, who was watching Finn with a furrowed brow. She looked back at Finn. “Yeah?”

Finn glanced at Poe, then he sat back, his expression almost sad. “Nothing. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

Rey nodded and gave them a quick grin. Poe was looking at her again, his eyes huge in the dim light of the room. He almost looked… wistful.

She smiled again, turned, and left the apartment.

******

Tylan Montrose was on the same committee she and Poe sat on. He was tall, smart, funny, and very good looking. He was a few years older than Rey and had been a part of the Republic Navy when the Hosnian System had been destroyed. He had been visiting his family on Vernell when the cataclysm had happened, and he had stayed there to help protect his planet, but he had also been a part of the great force that had attacked Exegol, answering the call for help when it came. He and Poe had become good friends since their arrival on Coruscant, and he had shown a definite interest in Rey. When she had politely declined his offer to go out for caf, Poe, who had overheard, told her that she should have said yes. “He’s a good guy,” he had told her.

If Poe trusted him, then she could. Right?

So, she had found Tylan after their meeting and struck up a conversation with him. After a while, she had asked him to join her for dinner that night at the Rockani, one of her favorite restaurants. He had said yes without any hesitation, a huge smile on his face.

Rey had no clue what she was doing, but she must have been saying the right things that night, because when he saw her to her apartment after dinner and she asked him inside, there was once more no hesitation from him. Unfortunately, only minutes after he started kissing her, she knew it wasn’t going to go any further. She was uncomfortable and felt no desire whatsoever. When she pulled back, Tylan didn’t push forward.

“Too soon?” he had asked.

Laughing nervously, she nodded. “I guess.” She wasn’t sure she would ever be ready. Not with this man. Not with anybody.

He had left without any anger and Rey found herself sitting on the floor, her back to the front door, trying not to cry.

A knock sounded and she jumped. She had a bell. Only one person ever knocked.

Sighing, she stood and keyed the door to slide open. Poe stood on the other side, Finn right behind him. They both looked worried.

“He didn’t stay long,” Poe was saying. “Is everything okay?”

She huffed and turned to walk over to her sofa, sitting down on it heavily. “What? Are you guys spying on me?”

They followed her, and as they often did when they thought she needed comforting (they always knew when she needed comforting), they sat on either side of her, Poe on her left, Finn on her right.

“Of course not,” Finn was saying.

“We just knew you had a date with Tylan and were paying attention when he brought you home.” Poe was looking at her intently. “He… didn’t try anything you didn’t want, did he?”

Rey looked at him, giving him a smile with no humor in it. “Don’t you think you would have found him in two pieces on the floor if he had?”

He rolled his eyes and brought his arm up around her shoulders. “Yeah, yeah.”

“Just not your type, huh?” Finn asked, leaning into her.

She sighed, already more comfortable sandwiched between these two men than she had been with Tylan at any point during their date. “I’m not sure I have a type,” she said. “I just want…”

“What?” Finn whispered.

“Someone with a lightsaber as cool as yours?” Poe asked.

Rey laughed and turned to him. “There is no such person.”

Poe grinned. “True.” His smile faded and he looked past her at Finn. “But… there is us.”

Rey frowned at him, glanced at Finn, then back at Poe. “You?”

Poe nodded. “Yeah. Finn and I.”

Rey’s heart started to race. “I – I’m not sure what you mean?”

“We love you, Rey,” Finn said, bringing his face close to her. When she turned toward him, he brought his forehead in to touch hers.

“And I love you both, but…”

“But?”

“You have each other.”

“You don’t think we’re capable of loving you just as much as we love each other?”

“I… I didn’t think you looked at me that way.” Her voice sounded small. Hopeful.

“We always have,” Poe said softly. “We’ve been wanting to ask if you felt the same for a while. I knew you felt that way for Finn, I just…” he paused, glancing at Finn again, then looking back at her. “I just wasn’t sure you looked at me like that.”

Rey stared at him now, and she felt tears well up in her eyes. “I do,” she whispered. “I always have. Since the first day I met you.”

“I told you so,” Finn said, a smile on his face.

Poe shoved Finn slightly with the hand that was over Rey’s shoulder, then focused on her again. “Do you trust us, Rey?”

“Implicitly.”

He nodded. “Then let us take care of you.”

Rey felt a sudden tightness between her legs at his words, and she squeezed her thighs together, the shot of desire much stronger than anything she had ever felt before. She looked back and forth between the two of them, in awe of how they were both focused on her, looking at her the way she had only seen them look at each other before. Was it possible, she wondered? Was it true that she could really become a part of their bond in this way?

“Yes,” she whispered. “Please, yes.”

They ended up at Poe and Finn’s apartment because Rey mentioned that their bed was much bigger than hers.

Rey couldn’t believe how excited she was as these two men she loved and trusted more than anyone led her into their shared bedroom. Once there, Finn wrapped his arms around her and began to gently nuzzle her cheek. “You’ll let us know if we do anything you don’t like, right?”

Rey nodded, suddenly afraid. What if she didn’t like any of it? She’d touched herself in the past, but it had always led to less than satisfying results. Maybe she couldn’t enjoy sex?

Finn moved his face closer to hers and she closed her eyes as his lips made contact. He was so gentle, and so careful, and she liked it. It wasn’t at all like the kisses she had just shared with Tylan. She wanted more.

She brought her arms up around his neck and opened her mouth, inviting more from him, and he responded by opening his own mouth and letting his tongue touch hers. She shivered, loving the sensation, and began tasting him in earnest. He moaned, his arms tightening around her middle. All too soon, he pulled back, looking behind her at Poe. She also looked over, a bit dazed, and her eyes were immediately drawn to the older man’s bare chest. He had removed his shirt while she and Finn had been kissing.

He looked at her, a question in his eyes, and Rey reached for him, anxious to touch him. To taste him next. He smiled and drew her into his arms as she ran her hands along his bare shoulders.

“Poe’s gonna lead us through this, okay?” Finn said quietly from behind her. Rey looked at him over her shoulder. “I didn’t have a whole lot of experience before he and I became lovers, and none of it was really great until him.”

Rey looked back at Poe. “I have no experience,” she whispered.

Poe smiled softly. “I think you’ll figure it out pretty quick,” he told her. He looked at Finn. “This is going to be all about Rey tonight, Finn. Is that okay?”

“Absolutely,” Finn responded without hesitation. “I can’t wait to see her come over and over and over…”

“Finn!” Rey giggled, feeling her face heat. She looked at Poe, suddenly nervous again. “What if I can’t?”

Poe brought a hand up and stroked her cheek. “Judging by your reactions to us, I think you can,” he told her. “But even if you can’t, we’re still going to make this as enjoyable as possible for you. Deal?”

Rey nodded, and Poe’s lips quirked once more before he moved in to kiss her. Rey didn’t even hesitate this time, opening her mouth to accept his tongue, loving the feel as much as she had with Finn. As they kissed, she felt Finn’s hands on her hips, stroking her through her leggings, squeezing her. Suddenly, she wanted nothing more than to have them both touch her bare skin. She ran her hands down along Poe’s chest, enjoying the smoothness and heat of his skin. She looked down as her fingers trailed over his nipples, watching as they peaked at her touch. She looked over at Finn, realizing he, too, had removed his shirt. His dark chest was just as smooth as Poe’s but different. The contrast between the two men excited her. She wanted to explore them both completely.

Poe began to kiss and lick on her neck and she closed her eyes, letting her head fall back. Finn’s hands had worked up to the front of her body and were skimming up under the loose silky shirt she had worn for her date with Tylan. She held her breath as they reached her breasts, which she had left bare as she usually did when she wasn’t working. She let out a gasp as his hands cupped her gently, his large, rough fingers squeezing her firmly. A rush of moisture flowed from between her legs, and she wanted to be embarrassed, but she felt too good. Both of them touching her, standing shirtless with her tucked between their hard bodies…

She cried out, her knees feeling weak. She grasped Poe’s arm with one hand and reached back for Finn’s shoulder with the other to keep herself upright. “Kriff!” she swore. She never swore!

Poe lifted his head and she could hear his soft chuckle in her ear. “Yeah, I think you’re going to enjoy this, Sunshine.” He moved back more and she immediately missed his heat. “Let’s get you undressed,” he said, then looked at Finn.

She glanced at the man behind her, who was grinning and nodding. He also stepped back a bit, grasping the hem of Rey’s shirt and pulling it up and off of her in one smooth movement. Rey gasped again, looking at Poe in surprise, feeling far too exposed. He was looking at her breasts, biting his lower lip, and his appreciative expression actually soothed her. He looked up at her, maintaining eye contact with her as he stepped close once more. He reached for the fastener to her leggings on her hip, undoing it while he nuzzled her nose with his. He glanced behind her to Finn, and once more the two men seemed to communicate silently, as both reached for the waistband of her leggings and began tugging them down, taking her underwear with them.

Rey bit her lip as she reached out to brace herself on their shoulders, a laugh of pure joy bubbling up as they worked together to get her shoes and leggings off. Before she knew it, she was completely naked and the two men stood straight, both moving in front of her, both looking at her with hot eyes.

“Perfect,” Poe whispered.

“Kriffing beautiful,” Finn agreed.

Rey felt her whole body heat and knew her skin, so much paler than either of them, was turning bright red in various locations.

Poe smiled again, warm and inviting. “Why don’t you lay down on the bed, Rey?”

Taking a deep breath, Rey did as he asked, her legs still shaking. She crawled to the middle of the big bed, then lay down on her back, bracing herself on her elbows as she watched the men in front of her work at removing their boots and trousers. They were so different, she thought. The way they looked, the way they moved, the way they spoke. And yet, their hearts were almost identical. She felt tears form in her eyes as they gave each other a sweet kiss, suddenly knowing that was why she loved them both. They were both so very good, two extraordinarily kind people who had lived very hard lives and were now ready to live their happily ever after.

And they wanted her to be a part of it.

Her eyes were drawn downward as they turned to face her once more. Again, they were very different from each other, but both were rather intimidating. While she may have never had intercourse before, she wasn’t unfamiliar with male human anatomy, and both of these specimens were impressive. Finn’s was a bit longer, she thought, and the head was larger, but Poe’s was overall thicker. Finn was already almost fully erect, his dark cock standing stiffly out from a thin nest of black hair. Poe had more hair, and he was still only at half-mast. He gripped himself as she watched, running his hand along his length, and she knew it was age and experience that made him seem more relaxed, not lack of desire. She felt her pussy leak and she moaned softly, her hips rocking unconsciously.

Poe gave her a wicked smile and moved to the side of the bed on her right, still stroking himself. “Mmmmm,” he hummed. “You smell that, Finn?”

“Frick, yes!” Finn exclaimed, moving toward the opposite side of her.

They both climbed on the bed, stretching out on either side of her. “Let’s give her the perfect first time,” Poe whispered. Rey let herself fall back completely on the bed, and Poe followed her, taking her mouth with his once more and kissing her like there was no tomorrow. She felt Finn’s hand on her breast, and then his mouth. She arched her back and moaned into Poe’s mouth. She felt a hand, she wasn’t sure whose, gently grab her left wrist and direct her to Finn’s cock. She wrapped her hand around him, and as she did so the person directing her, Poe she determined, took her other wrist and directed it to his cock. Then he left her lips and moved down to mouth her other breast. She cried out, her hips jerking upward as they both began to suckle on her gently, her hands tightening on their cocks. “Oh, my stars!” she cried, as even more wetness leaked from her pussy.

Poe’s fingers found their way down her belly and were soon delving between her legs. “Shit, Finn!” he cried softly, lifting his head from Rey’s breast to look at his partner. “She’s so fucking wet!”

Rey watched as Finn brought his hand down to join Poe’s, and she almost began crying as they both fingered her, touching her where nobody but herself had ever been. “Oh, please!” she cried, tears leaking from her eyes.

“I want to taste!” Finn said, his voice rough. “If she tastes half as good as she smells…”

“Rey?” Poe was looking at her, one eyebrow arched. Asking for permission. At this point, she was quite sure she would deny him nothing.

“Please! Yes, please!”

Both men smiled and glanced at each other before sliding down the sheets. Rey automatically lifted her legs, spreading them wide, and they easily slipped underneath, placing her ankles on their shoulders, holding her open.

“Fuck, Poe! Look at her!”

“She’s dripping! All for us, Finn!”

Rey cried out, arching her hips up toward them, her heels digging into their shoulders, uncaring how desperate she seemed.

They heeded her unspoken request and dropped their heads, lips and tongues and teeth attacking her center. Her inner thighs, the super sensitive area between the crease of her thigh and the edge of her pussy, the lips of her pussy, her clit. They never stilled, working her over as she never, ever dreamed she would enjoy. As Finn toyed with her clit with his tongue, Poe inserted a finger into her cunt. She rocked against it, shocked how much she loved the intrusion and how much she wanted more. Soon, another thick finger joined the first, and Finn began sucking gently on her clit. She felt her body quicken shockingly fast, and the explosion took her by surprise. Her vision flashed white and she screamed, her hands coming down on top of the heads of her tormentors. She gripped Poe’s thick hair and her fingers tightened along the curved braids along Finn’s skull.

She felt her body go limp and she dropped her hands, opening her eyes to see both men smiling at her, almost giddy. “Told ya,” Poe said smugly.

Rey laughed, her body still trembling.

Poe turned to Finn and the two kissed, sharing her juices between them. Rey moaned at the sight, shocked that she could get so turned on again so fast. Poe pulled back first. “Keep her wet down here,” he told Finn. “I’m going in.”

Finn grinned. “Yes, sir.” Rey shifted, hoping she was ready for whatever Poe had planned. It was apparent as she watched them together that while she suspected Finn topped when they had sex, Poe was still in charge. She had to admit, she liked having him in charge.

He slid up to lie next to her again, then gently pulled her right arm upwards. “Lay on your side,” he said softly. As she did so, he positioned himself behind her and then reached down to pull her right leg up. She didn’t resist, but then whimpered as Finn immediately dived in to start licking her wide open pussy once more. “We want you wet and loose,” Poe whispered in her ear. He nipped her lobe, which sent a whole new batch of shivers up her spine. “No pain today. Not if I can help it.” As he spoke, he let her leg down to rest over his hip and he used his hand to direct his cock up to her weeping hole.

She felt him slide inside with no resistance whatsoever, the pressure was intense and amazing. “Oh, my Force!” she cried. “Oh, yes!” She felt Poe smile against the back of her jaw where his face was resting, and then his hips were moving. Back and forth he moved, sliding in and out of her. Finn continued to tongue her clit and she closed her eyes, so absorbed by the pleasure she was feeling that she felt as if she were floating.

“Oh Kriff!” she heard Finn mutter.

“Stay with us, Rey,” Poe growled in her ear.

She opened her eyes and realized she was floating. Not very high, but high enough her boys were having a tough time finishing what they started. She gasped a laugh and dropped back to the bed. “Sorry,” she huffed.

Poe chuckled, and she could feel it as well as hear it with his chest pressed against her back once more. “I’m taking it as a compliment. How about you, Finn?”

“Hell, yeah,” her best friend uttered as he continued his ministrations between her legs.

Poe’s thrusts got a bit harder and Rey could feel her body climbing once more, this time a little slower. But not much. She reached for her release this time, knowing exactly what awaited her and craving it. Her body spasmed even harder, and Poe’s arm tightened around her middle, holding her close to him until she came back to herself. It was an amazing, comforting feeling. She brought up her right hand to lace her fingers with his where they rested on her belly. She used her other hand to push gently on Finn’s head, asking him to stop, as Poe slid out of her.

Finn moved up again so that they lay face to face, and she smiled softly at him. He stroked her cheek gently, then moved in to kiss her. He tasted salty and a bit sweet. He tasted of her.

They lay there together for a long moment, letting Rey rest, but soon she became aware of Poe’s still hard cock poking her buttock, and Finn’s was bobbing gently between them. She looked him in the eye. “I want you, now.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, his dark eyes gentle but excited. She felt another gush of wetness between her legs at his husky voice.

“Oh, yes.”

Immediately, Poe moved away from her, gently pushing on her shoulder so that she once more lay on her back. Finn moved to Rey, his muscular body seeming huge as he kneeled between her legs and lowered himself over her. He settled on his elbows as Poe demanded softly, “Lift your knees, Rey.”

She did as asked, and felt the tip of Finn’s cock brush up against her clit. She arched up and cried out.

“You want me inside you?” Finn asked, his voice rough, his jaw tight.

“Yes!” she almost shouted. “Please, Finn!”

“Listen to your Jedi Master, Finn,” Poe grumbled, his expression almost wild.

Finn groaned and used his hand to aid in his entrance, then he slid in just as easily as Poe had. Instinctively, Rey brought her legs up further so she could wrap her ankles around his thighs as he began to thrust. She gasped and threw her head back on the pillow, closing her eyes. How did she never know how good this could be?

She opened her eyes to see Poe’s face next to hers. “You like that?” he asked, his eyes dark, his pupils dilated in excitement. “You like Finn fucking you?”

“Yes!” she groaned, then reached for him, grabbing him by the back of the head and pulling him down for a kiss. He devoured her mouth as Finn started thrusting harder. Rey once more felt her body ignite and knew what was coming. She pulled back, shouting “Yes!” into Poe’s mouth.

“Come again, Sunshine!” Poe demanded. “Come again for us!”

And she did.

******

Poe was the one who got up to get them some water a short time later.

She watched as he walked naked across the room, his penis still erect, the head red and weeping. She looked down at Finn’s cock as she sat up, realizing that he was still hard, too. As Poe brought back a large glass of water, Rey looked back and forth between them. “Are you..” She cleared her throat. “Are you going to… come?”

Poe just smiled at her as he sat on the edge of the bed, handing her the water. “Well, I would like to at some point,” he said, his voice teasing. “I’m sure Finn would, too.” Finn nodded his head vigorously. “I guess the question is where do you want us to come? On you, on each other, or in you?”

“In me!” Rey exclaimed without hesitation, then she looked down, embarrassed, as she took a sip of water.

Poe’s smile just got bigger. “I was hoping you’d say that. You’re up to date on your contraception shots, I assume?”

Rey nodded, looking up at him again, then looking at Finn as she handed him the glass.

Finn grinned as he accepted the water. “It’s gonna get messy,” he said, waggling his eyebrows.

“It’s already messy,” Poe argued. “Have you seen what this woman is doing to our bed?”

Rey reached over and slapped his chest lightly with the back of her hand. “And whose fault is that?”

The three of them laughed as they passed the glass around, finishing the water. Rey noticed that their erections had softened a bit during their rest, but Poe had a solution for that.

He lay on his back and patted his thighs. “Ride me, Rey,” he told her.

She straddled his thighs and watched as Finn sidled up next to them, laying half on his side facing them. He and Poe kissed before Poe looked at Rey once more. “Take us both in hand,” he said. “You’ve got two of them for a reason.”

Rey giggled and rolled her eyes. “Very funny,” she said as she took him in her left hand and Finn in her right. She began to slide her hands up and down their cocks, her breathing quickening once more. She could feel them get stiffer in her hands, and she was not surprised when her body responded with even more moisture.

“There you go, Sunshine,” Poe said softly. She was already dripping on his thigh. “Now, when you’re ready, mount me.”

She nodded, let go of Finn, then shuffled forward and up, slowly impaling herself on Poe’s cock. “Mmmmmm,” she moaned. This position was different, but felt just as good.

“Good girl,” Poe said, and Rey felt her breath catch.

“Hmmm, she likes that,” Finn growled. They had both noticed her reaction to Poe’s praise.

Poe grinned. “Just like you like being told what a good boy you are?”

Rey looked at Finn who looked moderately embarrassed. He sat up a bit and leaned toward her. “I guess we’re both lucky we found our Dom, huh, Rey?”

Rey nodded, not really wanting to contemplate the fact that she liked being told what to do. But only by Poe.

“So, does that mean you’re going to keep doing what I tell you, Rey?” Poe asked, one eyebrow raised.

Remembering what Finn had said to him earlier, Rey bobbed her head. “Yes, sir.”

Poe nodded, then shifted his hips, making Rey gasp. “That’s my girl,” he whispered. “Now, lean over and put Finn’s cock in your mouth.”

Rey’s eyes immediately turned to the cock in question, then she looked upward to see Finn, an excited look on his face, lay back down, scooching up a bit so she had easier access to him. Licking her lips, she grabbed his once more fully erect penis and bent over it. Carefully, she wrapped her lips around the large head, curiosity and desire driving her on. Poe was rocking his hips up into her steadily, and as she tasted Finn for the first time, she felt another wave of immense pleasure wash over her. She began to rock her own hips to meet Poe’s thrusts and matched the movement with her hand on the base of Finn’s cock, squeezing him as she sucked on his tip.

“Oh, fuck, yeah,” she heard Finn groan, and she looked up to see him lean over and kiss Poe. “This is a kriffing dream come true,” he said, breathing hard against Poe’s mouth.

Poe groaned and closed his eyes. “If this is a dream, I don’t ever want to wake up!”

His hips increased their pace and Rey couldn’t concentrate on Finn anymore. She sat up, her hands on Poe’s belly, rocking against him, seeking that amazing high she knew existed now. She reached for Finn’s cock again, trying hard to focus on him as well as her own pleasure, but the feelings were too intense. “Oh!” she cried. This felt different. Less like an explosion and more like a tidal wave. Her thighs started to tremor uncontrollably and she felt as if she was falling. “Finn!” she cried as she reached for him.

He sat up and pulled her into his arms. “Let go!” he told her. She did, letting the wave take over and crying out into Finn’s shoulder. She looked at Poe as she slowly came down, wondering if he had felt the same intensity she had.

He was looking at her with wide eyes. “You are so fucking beautiful,” he said gruffly.

She started to back off of him, only to realize he was still hard. “Poe,” she said as Finn let her go. “You didn’t come.”

He smiled. “I will, Sunshine,” he told her. “But I want Finn to claim you first.”

Finn’s expression was startled. “Poe?”

“You found her first,” Poe said with a soft smile. He pushed back and sat up. “But you better hurry. I’m not going to wait for my turn forever.” He gripped his cock, running his thumb over the tip and the bead of precum that sat there.

Finn looked at Rey. “Okay.”

Rey nodded. “Okay.” She bit her lip. “How..?”

“Can I..?”

“Oh, just take her from behind,” Poe interrupted. “You know you want to.”

Rey grinned at Poe’s outburst, then she softened her smile for Finn before turning her back on him, spreading her legs and leaning down to brace herself off of her elbows. She looked back at him over her shoulder. “Come on, General. Give it to me.”

As Finn groaned, Poe shook his head. “Oh, Kriff! We created a monster.” He shoved Finn’s shoulder. “Hurry up and fuck her!”

Finn did as told, moving up behind Rey and pushing into her in one smooth motion. Rey gasped, once again startled and pleased all at the same time by the different feel these different positions gave her. He was so deep like this. And he was so hard!

“I’m not gonna last long,” he huffed as he began to thrust.

Rey couldn’t form any words as the slap of his hips against her ass got louder and faster. Kriff! She wasn’t, either! His hands gripped her hard, his fingers biting into the flesh of her waist. He moved one, placing it flat against her back in between her shoulder blades, but he didn’t put much pressure on her. It was almost as if he was bracing himself, so he wouldn’t fall over onto her. Her fingers gripped the bedsheets tight.

“I’m coming. I’m coming. I’m coming,” he began to chant.

“Give it to her, baby!” Poe growled.

Poe’s exclamation was all it took for Rey to feel her body overload once more. It wasn’t as strong as before, but it felt amazing, especially when combined with the feel of Finn’s release inside of her. She could almost imagine his hot seed coating her insides. As she suspected, he fell onto her, but not heavily, catching himself before his full weight came upon her. He kissed her shoulder blade wetly, then turned to Poe, who was laughing joyfully. They kissed, then Poe leaned down to kiss her as well. “I can’t even explain to you how beautiful you two look together,” he said, his eyes huge.

Finn backed up, pulling out and pushing himself up to the head of the bed, falling back onto the pillows. “Your turn, General.”

Poe looked at him, then looked at Rey. For the first time that night, there seemed to be some uncertainty in his expression, and Rey remembered that they had not asked her if she wanted this sooner because Poe believed Rey didn’t love him the way she loved Finn. She smiled and turned over onto her back, keeping eye contact with him. She spread her legs wide, grasping herself under the knees, holding herself open.

“Your turn, General,” she repeated Finn’s words.

His chest heaving, his cock now rock hard, he moved to kneel between her thighs. He placed his hands gently under her knees, pushing hers away, holding her open himself now. Still looking her in the eye, he moved forward and slid into her without any assistance. Rey was super sensitive now after literally being fucked over and over again by these men and coming… five times now? But she wanted this. She wanted him. All of him.

“You feeling my cum in there, Poe?” Finn said with a grin. “Got’cha a little extra lube this time. Not that you need it with how much she wants you.” His voice had gotten deep and lazy as Poe started driving in and out of Rey. Long, slow thrusts. Finn’s words combined with Poe’s intense look was too much!

Rey threw her head back. “Oh, please! Fuck me! Give it to me!”

With a soft roar, Poe obeyed and began thrusting hard. The slap of their skin, the squelching sound of his entry into her now saturated pussy, the grunts as he worked his hips into her… “Ahhhhhh! Poe!” Rey screamed, coming hard, her body spasming. She reached for Finn and he grabbed her hand, hanging on tight.

Poe’s body seized up as he began to fill her with his seed, his hips pulsing a few more times as he emptied himself. Rey fell limp. She let go of Finn’s hand and brought both of hers up to her face, rubbing against her eyes as she felt the tears come, overwhelmed.

She felt Poe slowly back out of her, but his fingers were up against her pussy immediately. “None of that!” he said huskily. “You stay in there were you belong,” he said as he pushed into her sensitive hole. He was pushing his and Finn’s combined cum back into her. Finn moved to help him and the two grinned at each other, kissing as they fondled her sore pussy gently. She giggled, knowing they were intentionally making her laugh, doing their best to keep her from becoming too emotional.

They looked at her, and their expressions made her want to cry again. It was a combination of love and awe, and she knew exactly how they felt.

Poe cleared his throat. “Come on,” he told her, moving to help her sit up and move back up to the head of the bed. Finn jumped off and headed for the ‘fresher, bringing back a couple of wet washcloths. Together, they cleaned up Rey and each other before settling on either side of her.

Rey was so, so tired, but even as sated as she was, she couldn’t help wondering if they expected her to leave and go back to her own apartment for the rest of the night. Force knows she didn’t want to.

As if he was reading her mind, Poe’s voice broke the silence.

“Move in here with us, Rey.”

For a moment, Rey truly believed she was imagining things, that her hopes and wishes were just manifesting themselves through dreams.

“You don’t have to,” Poe continued, his voice nervous now. “I mean, you’re used to living alone. Having your own space. I get it.”

Rey lifted her head and looked at Finn. “Do you want me to move in?”

He smiled and touched her cheek. “Yeah. But we’re not going to pressure you. We know it will probably cause a lot of gossip if you do.”

She scoffed. “As if I’m not already the brunt of gossip around here. Besides, we won’t be here much longer.” She looked at Poe. “Right? We’re still going to Yavin IV when things here are settled?”

Poe blinked quickly, and Rey could see the tears in his eyes. “Yeah, Sunshine. As soon as we can.”

“Yes,” she whispered. “Yes, I’ll move in with you.”

“I love you, Rey,” he said softly.

She reached up and ran her hand along his beard stubble. “I love you, Poe.” She turned to Finn. “And you, Finn. You both mean so much to me.”

“I love you, Rey,” Finn told her, his eyes shining now. He looked up and over her head at Poe. “And I love you, Moof Milker.”

Poe leaned over Rey and pushed his hand into Finn’s face. “I love you, too, Fart Face!”

Rey started giggling madly as she started tickling Poe.

He jerked back. “Hey! No fair!” He started tickling her back. Finn joined in and they wrestled with each other for a moment, but exhaustion soon overtook them all.

Curled up between her boys, it didn’t take long for Rey to fall asleep, knowing that whatever the future threw at her, she had finally found her happily ever after.

THE END

[thegoldheartlocketandkey-blog]

911 Spoilers Season 2: You’ve been warned. 😅

Episode 1

Okay so I wasn’t kidding when I said I was taking notes during my rewatch of season 2. I’ll show you the first page out of 15 pages I’ve written.

My hand writing is atrocious, and my grammar is definitely all over the place, but if you find my hand writing difficult to read, I’ll have my notes transcribed below. With more of an analysis/summary.

Buddie ❤️

Season 2: Episode 1

• Buck meets Eddie (Shirtless). Buck is obviously intimidated and subconsciously finds him attractive.

Can we talk about the song choice the producers/editors went with for this scene. What do you mean “What a man” is playing in Buck’s head when he first sees Eddie.

• Eddie obviously not comfortable with team yet, wants to be impressive. Shows off Army skills. Buck is more jealous.

Eddie really just wants to be accepted and apart of the group, and just do a good job. And we have Buck over here being grumpy and realistically concerned over his own place in the team.

• Gym scene= Lots of peacocking. Eddie just wants to be helpful / impressive. Eddie obviously finds Buck attractive Buck is too jealous to actually notice that.

Why are they being so unnecessarily aggressive with each other. The tension in the room isn’t just a simple I don’t like this person vibe. It’s more of a lustful tension, that’s the best way to describe it. Keep in mind I thought the tension in this scene was weird when I first watched the episode, and before the idea of shipping them ever crossed my mind. Now rewatching it just solidifies my desire for them to end up together.

• Eddie & Buck remove a bomb and this near death experience squashes any bad blood between them and is the start of their friendship.

Possibly the shortest Enemies to Besties trope to ever exist. Not going to say Lovers yet, but the way they were looking at each other definitely suggests that possibility.

• Buck tries to come up w/ cute nicknames for Eddie. Eddie is enjoying the interaction. Both acknowledge the other is attractive when trying to figure out who won the calendar.

This scene. Eddie’s reactions. Bucks complete 180 behavioral change towards Eddie is the moment I acknowledged their mutual attraction towards each other. It’s still not the moment I shipped them, it was something I didn’t fully acknowledge until I watched more episodes. I just knew they were going to be really great friends.

* Lots of smoldering eyes from Eddie and lip biting. Eddie may not realize it, but his body language is screaming he finds Buck attractive.

Eddie doesn’t lip bite when looking at Chim, Bobbie or Hen. He only seems to do it when looking directly at Buck.

Transcribing my notes for the other episodes might take me a while. I plan to post my notes for episode 2 and 3 soon because they are short. I may even include episode 4. Idk, this little project is just to get me ready for Season 7 and possibly channel my obsession in some way other than reading fanfic.

Please feel free to tell me if I missed something or if you think I’m wrong about something I’m happy to discuss these episode break down.

[snarky-magpie]

You are one of the few people who ship prongsfoot and Jegulus. How do you keep that up in the fandom and what is so appealing for you about both Jegulus and Prongsfoot? Elaborate

Hi nonnie, thanks for such an interesting ask (and also thanks for confirming my vague impression that most people choose one or the other ship but rarely both), and I apologize for the incoming wall of text.

How do I keep that up in the fandom—well, tbh, mostly by staying in my corner and not interacting with the fandom all that much. Connecting with people doesn't come naturally to me in general (hello undiagnosed autism), so this is my usual mode of operation anyway. However, Jegulus shippers have been mostly lovely, even though they don't seem to engage much, which I'm guessing is partly because they have so much material to choose from, so it can get kinda overwhelming and impossible to interact with everything and everyone. I did meet a few great people through Jegulus, though, and I treasure those friendships highly. When I tried to interact with the prongsfoot people, I was quickly taught that Jegulus shippers are not welcome. (I mean come on, this is ridiculous, it's just making imaginary people fall in love, it shouldn't be this divisive). It almost soured me on the ship altogether, but I love James and Sirius too much, so I just decided to stick to my lane, quietly write about them, and not get involved in this part of the community. It makes me a little sad, but that's the way things are.

Anyway. Now onto the more fun part, what I find appealing about both of these ships. To me, they're two different sides of the same coin, sort of. I believe I already mentioned this once, but Jegulus has a lot of inherently popular tropes going for it:

Enemies to lovers

Dating/pining in secret

Best friend's brother

Grumpy x sunshine

Sport rivals (quidditch or any other sport in modern AUs)

Second chances (in case Regulus joins the DE and then changes his mind)

Starcrossed lovers (pun intended)

Redemption arc

Tragic endings (if that's your thing)

So despite the characters never interacting in canon, there's a lot to build on and that's what makes the ship so attractive to a lot of readers and writers, myself included. Also, precisely because these two characters never really interacted in canon, we have so much room for interpretation, and almost nothing of it can be called wrong (I mean, it's fic, so it inherently can't be wrong, but still.). If you squint, you can even imagine Jegulus IS canon. Do we know who James dated before Lily? Nope. Him so obnoxiously crushing on a popular girl could very well be overcompensating. So yes, there's a lot to play with.

Prongsfoot, on the other hand, has a lot of basis in canon (I know this doesn't have to matter, but my OCD brain kinda likes it when things align with canon. That doesn't mean I agree or support JKR. She can rot for all I care.) James and Sirius are canonically besties. And not only besties, they're completely unhinged about each other. We only see them interact rather briefly, but it's clear they're devoted to each other. (I particularly love the moment when a girl eyes Sirius hopefully and he completely misses it because he's too busy ogling James.) Sirius is the only one who can make James behave. James is the one Sirius runs to when he needs sanctuary. They created freaking two-way mirrors to communicate when the other was in detention because they're so co-dependent an hour or two without speaking to the other is just too long. I know people argue with "yes, because they're brothers" - excuse me, do you actually have siblings? This is not sibling behavior :D (Also, they're not. Sirius lived with the Potters for about a year when he was 16 before moving out, and that's that.) Tbh, I don't understand why this ship isn't top-tier popular because, in any other fandom, it would be, but here, Wolfstar stole their spotlight, and the rest is history. Probably partly because we don't actually see James and Sirius both alive at the same time. (That's just my guess, though.) Speaking in story tropes, they're the epitome of friends-to-lovers, (possibly bi/gay awakening), soulmates, oblivious idiots. I'm generally a big fan of the friends-to-lovers dynamic, so that's probably what attracts me most to this ship.

So for me, as a writer, it's fun to explore these different facets of the characters—because the James from prongsfoot is not the same James who loves Regulus (although sometimes it's confusing to keep all these headcanons separated in my brain, and they start to influence each other, lol). It's also fun to write the different dynamics, so I don't get bored.

TL;DR: Both ships are great for different reasons, I wish people were more tolerant of other ships (and characters), and I've got a long prongsfoot and jegulus story coming in case you're interested. Cheers, and once again, thanks for the ask.

(PS. this is what happens when someone tells me to elaborate.)

[hellcatinnc]

Vampire Dormitory Anime Review

Spoilers Included

Ok this anime has so much confliction to me in whole I loved it but at the same time it annoyed me. I do think it is worth anyone putting on their watch list though even though for people that fall into being Ren lovers you don't want to get your hopes up will not get you anywhere. This story is based off one vampire saving a girl/boy/girl from dying when she fell by accident when she was contemplating suicide. You go on this path listening to Ruka be a cute blush boy one minute and ridiculing Mito about her blood tasting horrible. He even kept pushing her aside past his own feelings so he could be the king of vampires and be with his one true destined partner. Like yeah he saved, yeah he took her in but come on this should not have been a open and closed love story. I don't get why when you add a second guy to some anime's and I end up shipping the second guy more, this is another anime that has that happen to me. So lets break down the characters then I will go over what burned my ass the most in this anime and what I loved.

Mito Yamamoto

Such a pretty girl and I do like her as a character she isn't useless. She has her own personality she does get hurt easily but then again I think this is why I like her I can relate. The being alone, falling too fast and getting hurt easily. They need her in an otome game for sure or at least a personality like hers. Anyways she is the main of the story and I'm glad in the end she got a happy ending she deserved it.

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The cute back and fourth scenes with both guys and Mito in the picture were perfect. She looked good with both of them I'm not gonna lie. Although I still prefer her with Ren I guess too each their on in the end. It really is her story though about how she finds love and friendship and a home.

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Ruka Saotome & Mito Yamamoto

I started watching the show for this pairing however I honestly think it didn't last long for me. I mean Ruka isn't a bad guy he just listens to everyone else too much on what he should do and not follow his heart. It really was the only issue I had with him because he is a sweetheart, and is a blushy boy too. He was too easily swayed even when there was a imitation Mito he jumped right to her and even chose to save her life over Mitos'. I'm not sure why so many were against Ren but loved Ruka when he did just as many stupid shit if not more. He broke her heart on several occasions, he pushed her away, he played this pull her in to push away again, and sometimes he could be plain rude to her. In the end not gonna lie the first time he really won me over when he more the less said fuck it all I want her before he even knew it was his destined partner. I loved this side of Ruka he finally grew a back bone and went after what he wanted at any consequence. Ruka isn't a horrible character I do feel like he fits a teenage age perfectly where I feel like Ren is more grown up.

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Ren Nikaido & Mito Yamamoto

Ren stole my heart pretty early on and I think he got the shit end of the deal. So most the show is about him and Mito I swear, cause everytime Ruka is hurting her she runs to Ren. He is like a big brother/best friend trope type for sure. He tries to come off as a tsundere early on but he isn't he just doesn't take shit off people. He is lonely and has been alone most his life just like Mito this is why their friendship I think grew very fast. In a perfect world Mito would have been better off with him he would protect her like know other. However after you get to a point you can really love this man and what they have together the writers fuck it up.

I mean it too, you know when you get a certain character and you get a idea of their personality and stuff is, well this is what you get with Ren you learn who he is and how much he loves Mito whether girl or boy. However writers had to make sure people didn't like the 2nd male lead much more so the last 2 or 3 episodes makes him in to a asshole that turns her into a male so he can try to force her to marry him. This is not or has not been once the kind of man he is. I was so enraged by this, so your telling me a man who wipes away her tears, beats peoples asses that bother her, holds her close when Ruka hurts her...your telling me thats the man that would force something on her...I think not. I will hold to the end Ren is my favorite and I would have gladly took him off her hands to have a real man. OMG and when this man blushes I want to kiss him so bad. I love my blushy boys.

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Komori

Now this man likes to flip back and fourth between being the vampire king and a somewhat cute shyish type guy who is everyones boss at his restaurant. Its funny until the end no one realizes this is the same guy. I mean look at this man how can you no tell he is the same lol. Now I can't say I much cared for his attitude as the king though came off like a ass at times.

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Takara Kagurazaka

Takara really isn't anything special he is pretty geeky and you mostly only see him in a group or when he is with Juri on his own. He is crazy about girls but not a one want him. However I loved how he was with Juri always protecting him and even after Juri confessed his love he didn't blow him off. I don't think he is gay but Juri means everything to him hoping to read the manga and see if these two become more would be so cute and so happy for Juri.

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Juri 

This boy is the sweetest and the cutest like I can't even he has this beautiful little face that makes me want to kiss him. He is much too pretty to be a boy probably prettier than Mito to me and she is a girl lol. Anyways its so sweet to watch him and his little crush on Takara like I don't its not a heavy influence so people that don't like BL won't have to worry but I would love to see a spinoff with him in the BL universe for sure.

[violivs]

NMTDaily: Hero and Ursula’s Transmedia Accounts Debut

- I don’t think I ever knew that Hero had a transmedia Instagram account. That’s new to me! I’m excited to see what else she posts on it throughout the series.

- I do remember Ursula’s tumblr but I don’t know if I ever scrolled back enough to see the photos in the most recent email before. It’s extremely cute that she includes links to follow “My Friend Hero”, “My Friend Bea”, and “My Friend Ben”. She’s a sweetheart. Ursula deserves the world and so much more appreciation.

- It’s also really interesting that she considers herself friends with Ben before the events of the series happen to combine the two halves of the friend group. It’s probably because she’s best friends with Balthazar and he’s the crossover friend who is close friends with both the girls’ group and the boys’ group. I think it’s very possible that Ben doesn’t fully realize that Ursula thinks of him as a friend and not just an acquaintance because she’s so quiet and it can be hard to know what she’s thinking. Now I’m really interested in what their friendship would be like. They probably wouldn’t hang out one on one, but they would enjoy each other and never quite know how to tell each other that. Which is definitely a type of high school friend experience people have that rings true to me. All from the tiny detail of her linking to his channel on her tumblr. I wonder if he links to her channel on his? I bet he does, I have to look out for that.

- Update: oh my god I just scrolled through Ursula’s tumblr and saw that she posted Ben’s first vlog and mentioned in the tags that she helped him edit it! He “tried to do everything himself” and almost managed it, apparently. That says to me that he was probably complaining about how hard editing was, and Ursula offered to help. And I checked, he thanked her in the video description on that vlog. Ben and Ursula canonically hang out and edit his first video just the two of them???? Excuse me, this changes so many things. I am now obsessed with the Ben and Ursula friendship. This is definitely, for Ben, an example of that thing where social anxiety makes you kind of selfish and unappreciative of the friends you do have, because you dislike yourself so much you never believe they really like you, and then you hold them at arm’s length and never realize that’s literally why you’re so lonely. Ben probably feels like he doesn’t know how to talk to Ursula because Ursula is so quiet, and I bet she can get overwhelmed by him, but also sees that his heart is in the right place. And this makes Ursula yet another friend who has doubtless hung out with Bea and Ben separately and heard them complain about each other, so of course she’s on Team Love Gods. She’s just so dear and eager to help her friends, I love Ursula.

- I am also still sad that Ben never had an in-world Tumblr account I could have followed. It’s not story-necessary, but I’d have liked it.

- I kept thinking the grass was bugs and getting scared, but I still like seeing Ursula’s nature photography. She’s definitely growing up to be a pro videographer/photographer/director/cinematographer or something.

- Ursula also posted a picture of a TARDIS cake she and Hero baked for Bea, which, first, why are there not more Hero and Ursula friendship fluff fics AND Hersula ship fics about them baking together? I love this. They are so cute and sweet.

- Does this cake post mean we have an approximate canonical birthday for Beatrice? Baking a cake for someone feels like a birthday thing. It was posted on March 30, so is Bea’s birthday March 30? This is huge, I don’t think we ever got anyone’s birthday except Hero’s elsewhere in the series! Unless the cake is a belated Welcome to Auckland cake? I haven’t rewatched Bea’s first video yet, I’m terrible, I know, so I don’t remember how long she’s been in town. They didn’t actually say it was her birthday, so it’s probably a Welcome cake. Oh well. Still sweet!

- Also, the tags say the cake is banana cake! So Beatrice already likes Ben’s favorite food, and she’s definitely a huge fan of Doctor Who even though she downplays that to avoid praising anything connected to Benedick. She’s so stubborn, I love her, and they are meant to be. This will not be the last detail indicating how much they have in common and see eye-to-eye. I love all of it.

- I also love that this isn’t the last themed cake to appear! I remember the dalek cake from the pizza party later in the series. Ursula and Hero were hobby bakers and shippers on deck from the start!

- The email with the cake post is titled “putting the Who in superwholock”, which is so incredibly 2014, and also makes me realize that the NMTD characters were really only WhoLocks, none of them were Supernatural fans that I remember. I just find that funny given what a behemoth it was and is on tumblr. I don’t blame them, it’s the one of the three I’ve seen the least of too, it’s just amusing. I actually don’t know if it ever even aired over there, to be fair.

- We also got Bea’s first tweet, in the email with her first video, but it’s pretty simple, nothing to dissect. We get some good tweets later on, though! I promise I’ll make a post about Bea’s first video before the next video email on Wednesday. I’ve decided I don’t have to post recaps day-of, I just want to do them eventually.

- MVP of the past few emails: Ursula! You go, Ursula. Jules 20genderchild is so right that you deserved a last name!!!!

💖🦩🥭